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Acceptable-Success56 Archive

View 0 posts and 44 comments by Acceptable-Success56 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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5

Yes, I agree. It's more of a societal issue that encompasses all relationship types, romantic, platonic, even familial. Our "community mindedness" has moved in large part online (there have been significant positives with this also) and with that, physical interaction is diminished across the board. We are the first society that is just now discovering some of the cons that come with that. And that is a problem that I think people are becoming woken up to individually but it still might take a d…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/09/22 12:09 PM
4

I think this aspect is glossed over too easily yet is possibly the most important. The self evaluation and bringing oneself up to what you actually want of yourself as opposed to constantly seeking validation externally. Identifying our own personal standards and making numerous small adjustments toward them is a way that all people can become somebody that is a force that we like and by virtue others will like and be attracted to that. Most fundamentally mental health care resources and self co…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/09/22 12:01 PM
-4

Thank you for being a voice of reason.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/09/22 11:50 AM
0

This irony is baffling. It seems SO and you share some tendencies of what you identified as inaccurate and unfair interpretation of actual statements made. You received that statement very heavily as misandry. It means something more to you I can see. You probably feel the effects of the ramifications of what you interpret that statement to be. What you are feeling is incredibly valid I'm sure. I hope you can work through what you are feeling. SO heard OP's statement very heavily as misogyny. It…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates16/06/22 07:01 PM
0

I do believe this is a specific tender spot. There is plenty of context to see this. This is a common one - female value being dependent upon how pretty others find her and her other attributes not mattering in finding a partner and trying to not have that internalized into her daughter. One that is not experienced "as a man" -To me, it would be similar to the 'compliment/praise' given to a man "Well you make enough money, so you'll have girlfriends." As though his value is tied to what he provi…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates16/06/22 04:48 PM
-1

? I read. My SO makes jokes and I don't get offended. Meaning that they probs don't hit OP's sore spots, or that OP has done extensive work to heal those spots and they aren't so tender. Either way, OP doesn't feel hurt at these jokes. SO could probably, if she was actually an asshole and wanted to, make a joke that she knows OP is tender to, but she doesn't. That leads me to think she isn't bad person. She may not have the words to explain what and why she is feeling how she is feeling, but she…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates16/06/22 03:19 PM
-1

Lol, I did not in any capacity say that OP is emotionally stunted. My words meant she has injuries or tender spots from the way the world treats women that he can't easily fully grasp, and he has injuries or tender spots from the way the world treats men that she may not be able to fully grasp. It isn't indicative of lacking emotional intelligence or being emotionally stunted. I am trying to see how it could have been read as malice. I'll reread it a bit and try to understand what would cause it…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates16/06/22 03:15 PM
1

Maybe write it in a note and leave it for her. Yes go on with your day. Bring something home that she likes, like nachos to feel better lol, IDK you know her. Ready for what? Defending yourself? No. Ready to try to understand why this keeps popping up. You know it is not you. If she tries to say that, simply, calmly stop the accusations with the same phrase. "We know this isn't about me. We are trying to understand you and your sensitivity to something. Where does that come from? What does it br…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates16/06/22 02:49 PM
-6

She's hurt. Anger is hurt's body guard. Your comment may have triggered a tender spot that has been hurt a lot throughout her life and is still tender, so even though your comment was very benign it still could have hurt. So if she is hurt it is not necessarily your fault as much as her wounds from life not being healed. Healing herself is her responsibility. If you wanted to give a shit, you could acknowledge the various wounds that she has and adjust the way you regard her at those times, but …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates16/06/22 02:23 PM
1

Light agree. It's Unethical for sure, Immoral yes, but speaking about ones own experiences (and those involved) with other people is something that is very widespread. Men and women do this all the time. It is reprehensible behavior IMO and the sign of a bad person, but this is very common amongst all genders.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates04/06/22 01:49 PM
5

Thank you for this perspective and drawing this parallel. Thought provoking and presented well.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates18/05/22 12:55 AM
3

Although I think tone policing is incredibly annoying, if you were actually looking for a way to get the idea across, you could try different phrases that include acknowledgement of their issue and that don't include the token "not all men." Example "Yeah, There is huge issue with society has a bunch of awful people that think that they can sexually assault people and that it's no big deal. It's fucked. For example this person I know [insert story of male victim/female rapist] and it's so awful …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates05/02/22 05:58 PM
0

Although the terminology is outdated, in a historical sense, my understanding is that which has been dubbed "the patriarchy" is referencing the gendered social construct that placed men into the primary power roles. Ie, political, economic, and religious. (I don't doubt that men suffered under this construct also.) Is this what you view as a load of crap? How do you refute that those roles (and thus the powers in them) were held by men? Do you believe that historically the roles that women were …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 04:40 AM
1

The same way that MRA bringing up their issues in the context of feminist conversations can sound dismissive to another person while not actually being that?
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 03:57 AM
-1

All absolutely valid points. I do struggle a bit with the "women's discussions are built on the faulty premise that an issue is only a women's issue to begin with." I don't see that sentiment in my circles, but I not denying that it's probs out there.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 03:51 AM
2

Yeah the double standards are a big yuck from both directions. I don't need to imagine that scenario, I know what that feels like. And *deep breath* that is what it feels like a bit before I make myself sit down and rationalize it all out, MRA comes at me with some "woe is me shit." Initial reaction of eyeroll, and then wait....stop.... consider... still think it's small (as they probs do my big things) but stop and consider. It's a process. And I get that it's something to just not have patienc…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 03:47 AM
0

That's fair. It helps to understand the motivation of why that context and very very true about the absence on the larger scale of the varied male perspectives. I might think the reverse is also true. Is that something that can be considered? That male advocacy does try to tell me what problems I don't have when I very much do have them.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 03:41 AM
-4

I really like what you wrote. The automatic belief of ideas presented without reflection is a damning thing for society in soooo many ways. Thank you. Do we dare recognize the underbelly of MRA as a big factor in women viewing this as anti-women? Because it is so sharply there and it rears it's teeth in ways that maybe you guys can't fully see, not sure. Concrete example. A lot of my conversations in the gender discussions are around issues of sex assault/harassment, molestation, sex intimidatio…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 03:28 AM
1

I would really need to see sources on these comments. That is a hard one for me to sit with. DV, yeah I believe that for sure, but sex assault not being seen as something that affects women way way more? That's a tough one for me to consider, if I can be honest here.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:40 AM
2

Why are radfems considered representing as feminism? When the radicals in these circles are not your poster people?
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:38 AM
1

.... because the day came and I had employee and parent responsibilities that took priority, so the more nuanced conversation sections needed extra time. Forgive me?
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:35 AM
0

That is a fair perspective. Can we take a pause and LOL at how easily your sweeping experience of "99%" was accepted/overlooked and my more gracious "98%" was chopped with machetes. LOL. Only kind of kidding. If I am honest, for every study there is an equal and opposite, funded by an equal and opposite biased source many times with political and financial ties to questionable entities. It's so hard to ensure credibility overall. I have my life, statistics/books/articles that are so heavily mani…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:34 AM
1

Yeah, I've read some things about how the disposability of men could have come about evolutionarily speaking with regard to the notion that if a small village of people warred with another and most men died, then they could rebuild with just 1 or 2 men and have many children in a few years, but if the women were all killed or taken then the village is fucked because they could only rebuild with 1 child a year and that won't turn out well, and therefore men gradually became disposable people to u…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:28 AM
3

Especially the awful way that it is joked about with regard to prison rape that men experience. Ugh, I hate that part of this society, completely awful. That's heavy that the people close to you couldn't consider other ideas. Sucks.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:16 AM
2

Hmm. Are there any organizations or institutional forces that you are aware of that are have a dual-gendered focus to gender issues? (if that makes sense)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:14 AM
0

Interesting. I'm curious about your beliefs that people that react to MRA content as though it is anti-woman as malicious? Please expand if not too inconvenient.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:09 AM
0

Why are knee-jerk reactions based on engrained conditioning considered malicious as opposed to ignorant? I don't think hardly anybody is more concerned about blaming men than they are about helping women. What an interesting view.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:07 AM
-2

>bluntly said that most anyone advocating for male issues only does so to invalidate female issues. I don't feel like I said that at all. I tried to say that most of my exposure to male advocacy was in that context (literally awful men spewing nasty) and that is a big factor in reacting to it as anti-woman, not that it is representative of legitimate male advocacy. I used quotes to try to convey (badly it seems) that I don't view that the most common and loud type of my exposure to this is reali…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/02/22 02:05 AM
2

That's fair, and something I have (and continue to try to do) asked myself, is if my awareness is skewed (which of course it is, everybody exists in a skewed perspective). Question, do you think that women experience a similar sort of realization of similar possible minimization after perusing MRA communities for a bit as you did in feminist communities? Because the notion of receiving this content as anti-woman as an initial reaction is common?
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 09:33 PM
3

I appreciate you verbalizing that. That helps with understanding where to co-opting is coming from, a possible sense of frustrated hopelessness. Expand more on the "having worth in society" if you can. I have heard that sentiment a few times recently and it confuses me that MRA view women as "having worth in society" and men do not. As opposed to the idea that each gender is devalued in a variety of ways that differ a bit in application socially, but are just as harmful holistically.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 08:59 PM
-3

Harsh it out. Best to keep to topic at hand of "how to bring women around to understand that advocacy for male issues isn't anti-woman." but harsh it out if you have the time and wouldn't be too inconvenienced to do that labor. Each brick builds. Decency be damned (although needed in the end.) I say "I feel", "my perspective", "in my experience" as a qualifier that what I am saying and my statements are obviously formed by my unique exposures/readings etc and therefore do not indicate actual rea…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 07:05 PM
0

? I use "In my experience" as an qualifier that I don't take my paths of coming to perspective as the correct/only ones, free of problematic formation and conditioning, nor as fact and I am open to the idea that I am wrong and need adaptations and exposure. What qualifier should I use to invoke this sentiment if that is not acceptable? Your "guarantees" indicate you do the same as you just said I do in making grand claims and generalizations. The same that you said feminists do to men speaking a…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 06:21 PM
1

Oi. I answered OP's question, why does it seem to carry that feeling for women and how do we move past it? This is not indicative of my rationalization, and therefore conclusion, this is indicative of initial reaction and therefore the obstacle that I (an women possibly like me) must climb to the place of mutual understanding. Ya'll here have serious reactionary obstacles to figure out also, yeesh.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 05:44 PM
1

I'll sit with what you said, as I don't feel that I've made those assumptions or expressions at all, but I am open to me being wrong and possibly expressing a conditioning. I don't think being critical of radical feminism turns decent people off. I myself am critical of, as another said- bigots trying to use feminism as a platform to spew nasty. This isn't representative of the fundamental ideology that feminism advocates for in my conversations at all. But as we've seen our experiences in these…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 05:05 PM
6

Ugh, that's awful. And this sort of reaction is normal for you guys? I'm shocked. All my discussions that I've about genital mutilation have always included how awful it is that this is done to baby boys so readily and that any body modification done to a minor is a violation of bodily autonomy. Context, 4 sons, all intact, I get regularly asked about it so this topic comes up a lot in my circles. So you are saying that the solution to bringing to conversation to more inclusive gender discussion…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 04:55 PM
6

? I didn't complain that women's issues don't have enough discussion. Must have not expressed myself in an understandable way. The context of OP's post was that for male advocacy to be effective in the larger capacity we need women to join to advocate for male social issues. The question was eluding to how to get through to the hopefully rational women in this regard. My response was to recognize what their blockages are. I will sit with what you said about unearned defensiveness and try to work…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 04:44 PM
-2

I'm curious about this. Gendering issues that are not gendered? By this do you mean an issue that affects both equally but is discussed as affecting one more than another? I would say there are many times that issues are gendered by male advocates that are shouldn't be. Example the notion recently (I think a celebrity said something.. but it's been common) that men are the only group of people that are not unconditionally loved. When all people experience conditional love that is dynamic through…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 04:34 PM
4

That's fair. But isn't that part of the question. Why do women feel this way? Them feeling this way isn't blatant maliciousness. I have never intentionally perpetuated an environment that disallows men from bringing up their issues on their own but surely accidentally (by virtue of being a gender discussing woman) do just that. I should/could be more intentional in inclusion of broad effects of gender crap. The few times I have intentionally made the "what about the men" comments from what I've …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 03:58 PM
8

Hmm. Yeah that's what I try to force myself to think as my rational thought, after my irrational conditioned reaction. That this is a gender discussion and there are fewer socially acceptable platforms for them. Gah, honestly this is scary for me.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 03:37 PM
-3

I don't dismiss it. I am here. Trying to understand. This was an answer to "why do so many women feel that we are being anti-woman when we bring this up?" My answer for myself personally working through what I do feel as anti-woman sentiments is because of the context in which is usually brought up. Ignore me if annoying please. I am literally just trying to gain mutual understanding.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 03:35 PM
3

That's fair. Assumed the reasoning possibly inaccurately. I do still wonder how reactions would have panned out differently as based on my experience of the way people treat your questions based on perceived gender in male advocacy discussions. Emphasis on the "TRY to provide discussion on men's issues solely on their own." Even on this sub many (most?) posts (I could be subconsciously noticing inaccurately) are reactions to sentiments invoked around social issues that women experience and carry…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 03:29 PM
-6

I understand that is how a woman speaking on her struggle with trying to understand at all on this sub would be viewed. Just as a white person expressing difficulty understanding BLM perspective would be hated on. My mistake was thinking the question was similar to "how do we get the "colorblind" people to advocate correctly with us?" and assumed that meant that there was an effort to understand what is stopping them or where their points of allowance are to open them up to bigger discussions, o…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 03:03 PM
-12

Lol @ the downvotes to a reasonable person actually answering the question of why women are hesitant to adjust views of male advocacy in a positive way and being a woman expressing the obstacles to understanding yet trying to do so all the same. I wonder what better conversations would have happened if I hadn't disclosed that I was a woman. Just pretended to be a guy trying to understand and expressing the trouble with doing so. Lol Ok then.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 02:28 PM
-15

I am a woman. I follow this sub to purposefully expose myself to this sort of thing (I do this with many things that I have a hard time understanding and that my conditioning needs adjustment). If you want my perspective at all, I have a very very hard time with "male advocates" when the only time any "advocacy" about the plight of men in our society is brought up is when it is a response to a conversation about women issues or in response to "feminism" and they feel the need to hi-jack the disc…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/02/22 01:08 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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