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AlarmingToe8503 Archive

View 3 posts and 281 comments by AlarmingToe8503 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Judging by your characterization, it really sounds like you do actually feel women are entitled to honesty, and would like men to be less nefarious.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 12:29 AM
2

Obviously I'd help them if they asked. That's part of why they don't ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:39 PM
2

You wouldn't talk to them about hard stuff at work and expect them to listen? Not really. You wouldn't ask them to help you move? Definitely not. You wouldn't throw a party and ask them to bring drinks? 'Bring your own beer' is hardly needing help And if they did any of those things you would be uncomfortable? A little bit I guess, but for that exact reason, I know they'd only ask if it was a big deal. So I'd help regardless.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:33 PM
1

Prolly just my family, if anyone. I try to avoid needing help.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:29 PM
0

We know plenty about each other's lives, but we would pretty much never ask each other for help or support with anything. I wouldn't wanna put that my friends in such an uncomfortable situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:20 PM
4

Just found out that me and all my friends have no friends 💀
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:06 PM
3

I mean, yeah people in relationships lie to each other both directly and indirectly. Women will pretend to find their boyfriends physically attractive even though really they don't, and men will pretend to be sure about wanting commitment when really they're just interested in seeing where things go. But when dudes fall for those lies it's a skill issue and he should have known better, yet when women fall for it, the guy is an evil asshole manipulator and the woman is a victim.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 07:35 PM
5

Okay, but you see the problem with that, right? I can simply declare that 'women aren't entitled to commitment' or that 'women aren't entitled to honesty' and then there's not really anywhere else for the conversation to go because I've effectively just said "shut up and stop whining"
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 07:03 PM
3

I'll be less cheeky here than I was in that thread: I absolutely would not date someone for more than a few months without first discussing whether or not I want to get married some day. However, that thread was an entertaining chance to flip the "you're not entitled to X" rhetoric against the users here who frequently deploy that against guys when they complain about being mistreated by women. The OP of that thread was a real asshole to his girlfriend, but the comments are a goldmine for demons…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:28 PM
2

This is probably more of an "exception that proves the rule" thing but as far as I know I'm pretty sure there are actually a surprising number of vtubers who go for the "sultry older woman" archetype. Ironically, I have no idea if any of these women are genuinely in their mid 40s playing Warcraft on stream for money, or just 20-somethings putting on a more mature voice to corner a niche market.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:52 PM
1

Women already know they aren’t entitled to a decent man. I mean, it really sounds like OP's girlfriend thought she was entitled to a decent man. I would say that in my experience, the kind of "nobody is entitled to anything" rhetoric I was teasing you about it fairly uncommon outside of online gender politics spaces. I'd bet if I asked most women I know irl, they'd say they deserve a decent man.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:46 PM
3

Okay. So then she's not entitled to a decent man. Seems like that solves our conundrum.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:22 PM
2

Ah but you see, when women need help, it doesn't count.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:20 PM
3

"We" is the larger society we live in, and more specifically the parts of society most vocal about feminism and women's rights, who tend to be the same people complaining about the behavior of modern young men.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:03 PM
8

I thought we wanted to encourage men to ask for help more? I thought we wanted to teach men that it's okay to rely on others? Why are you acting like this isn't the obvious result of what we as a society pushed for well over a decade now. If you tell boys men are bad and men are the problem, you can't be surprised when many of them stay boys forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:57 PM
3

She's the one who wanted it, not him. Nobody is entitled to commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:48 PM
2

Yes, it's perfectly normal to have a conversation about marriage at that point. But she didn't, and that's nobody's fault but hers.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:57 PM
5

If no one is entitled to a relationship, then via the transitive property, no one is entitled to a committed relationship. Men aren't vending machines you put chores coins into to make commitment come out.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:53 AM
-1

It would be absolutely psychotic of me to expect every woman I flirt with or go on dates with to explicitly clarify in advance if she intends to have sex with me down the line. If that's something I really really care about, I need to ask about it directly. Same goes for discussing marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:43 AM
–

It rather illustrates the futility of trying to listen to women as opposed to listening to a woman, huh?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:38 AM
2

I get plenty of matches, so I'm not one of the guys complaining but in my experience I don't think these paid features really help you all that much. Yes, they want to encourage you to pay, but they also want to discourage you from leaving, so the incentives of these businesses are to drip feed you just enough attention from women to string you along. I would say the actual best thing you can do is to make sure your profile is set up to attract the specific type of woman you're interested in, ra…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:50 PM
9

or because complaining gives them a convenient excuse for their fear of talking to women. What do you even mean by this? Almost nobody is naturally afraid of talking to women. It's something they become anxious about by listening to women talk about how uncomfortable it makes them when men talk to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 02:57 PM
3

I'm dealing with you. Are you not a real person in the real world?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 02:35 PM
3

No, what's wrong is the follow up of other women saying "Actually that was a shit test designed to weed out gullible men" or men speaking on behalf of women, saying that normal women didn't say that, and that what normal women actually said is that they keep getting approached by socially unaware men who think insulting them is sexy.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 02:27 PM
5

Many completely normal women absolutely said things like "I'm sick of men approaching me on the subway." or whatever. Regardless, no woman has ever yelled at me for leaving her alone, so I think I'm gonna stick with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 02:19 PM
3

I was just turning OP's own logic back on her. I think we can probably determine from both the Women's March not being able stop Trump and the continued existence of the draft despite its overwhelming unpopularity, that there is more to achieving political change than sheer force of will, and that a particular policy remaining in effect cannot be used as an indicator that said policy is popular.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:29 PM
19

"Listen to what women are telling you!" I listen when they tell me not to approach women in public: "Actually that was a shit test designed to weed out gullible men." Please stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:15 PM
1

Why don't women speak up more about female rights? Surely if most women opposed abortion bans and supported the right to choose, then something would be done about it. Hope this helps you see the flaws in your logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:08 PM
3

Yeah that's why it's something to be discussed with one's wife/girlfriend well in advance to decide if they think starting a family is something they want enough to be worth the career sacrifices necessary to achieve it. And yes, motherhood is unfair. It's unfair that my hypothetical wife runs the risk of dying in childbirth while I don't, and it's unfair that the most logical division of labor involves her doing unpaid often invisible labor in the home. There are things I can do to make all of …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 08:05 PM
4

Part marks, show your work, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 02:06 PM
–

As a well off, financially stable and somewhat tall dude who was very short until suddenly getting taller at the tail the end of highschool, it just feels really shitty to know with near certainty that women despise my personality and interests but tolerate me because of my wallet and my skeleton. I'm sure attractive women feel the same way. What's unreasonable about this?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 01:56 PM
4

Men want their wives to work and then take a career hit while they raise their young children. It's quite normal for women to take a few years off and then return to work when the kid is old enough to go to kindergarten. At that point you might hire a babysitter for an hour or two after school. This is all fairly normal. That's what my parents did, and I would provably discuss doing something similar if/when my partner and I are seriously thinking about having kids. Although maybe a little more …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 01:38 PM
–

I thought it was the most selfless, sincere act of pure friendship, but it turned out he had ulterior motives, too. Bro did a selfless, sincere act of pure romantic sacrifice and you're reducing that to "ulterior motives" because you wanted it to be something you didn't have to requite to get more of. I'd be pretty miffed too if I were him. What's a guy to do? Just ghost you the second they develop feelings for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:19 PM
6

Yeah the gaslighting in this thread has been crazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 02:08 AM
0

Female college students in 2019 were five times more likely to say a male rape victim would like it I mean, based on your previous comments on the topic, isn't this a good thing in your eyes?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 01:36 AM
1

They obviously aren't, and never have been. They're just enough of a criteria that they have a significant impact on commercialized art.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 10:28 PM
–

It's also fucking maddening when older people talk about how sexist various aspects of society was when they were kids. Like yeah, I'm sure your teacher did tell you girls can't become scientists amen you were 11 years old in science class. I'm sure that sucked. I'm also sure that I don't give a fuck about it what some rando said in 1972 because it's 2026 and half of the scientists and engineers I know are women.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 09:10 PM
3

She proved my point that women do indeed think there's something wrong with men's preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 09:01 PM
3

I wasn't talking about being shocked, but since you mentioned it, what's up with so many women adamantly declaring that looks don't matter to them and they're only attracted to confidence and whatnot? Seems kinda dumb.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 08:58 PM
7

I don't think that's a fair comparison since people don't normally tend to get cancer more than once. It's more like telling someone who got really hung over that they shouldn't have drank so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:29 PM
2

Actually, I think this is a great example. A lot of fat people think they're fat because they eat too much NOW. But the reality for most fat people is that they're probably fat because they ate/were fed too much when they were a kid, so they literally have more fat cells than other people, rather than simply too much fat in the same number of cells. I think there's a huge benefit to a lot of people in knowing if the cause of their problems is something they can change in the present, or somethin…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:20 PM
9

Okay, so it sounds like we agree that there really was/is a whole cultural movement for several decades about how men have unreasonable expectations for female beauty standards and how that's awful and they need to be educated to change. So what was I wrong about?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:01 PM
2

Okay, so it sounds like you think male attraction is cruel and discriminatory and causes mental health issues in girls. So what part of my comment was incorrect?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:59 PM
9

They were also simultaneously targeting artists and creatives for drawing/designing their female characters "too sexy". Remember the whole "where are her organs" thing and other related culture skirmishes?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:47 PM
3

Men today seething about games catered towards women is direct response to the 2010s trend of deliberately desexualizing franchises that were previously popular because of their sex appeal. If that middle step hadn't happened and instead women just started getting more of their own hot videogame characters, there wouldn't be this much immature lashing out from men. For example: in the comicbook community it's widely accepted that Nightwing is eye-candy for women, and nobody has a problem with it…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:42 PM
9

Okay, well since we're just rewriting history then I'm just going to assert that there's a widespread height acceptance movement and that men always react totally calmly and rationally when a woman says she likes tall guys and you should disregard all evidence to the contrary.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:33 PM
4

No of course not, but men care more about seeing attractive members of the opposite sex in commercials and movies than women do. And regardless, women's response to all this was not to push for more hot guys in movies, TV and videogames, it was to push for fewer attractive women, because when you put a hot lady in movie, a TV show, or a videogame that's misogyny.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:25 PM
5

Thanks for proving my point. What is wrong with men wanting to see attractive women in the commercial entertainment they pay for?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:14 PM
6

Okay? You're right. That doesn't mean women don't also cry and scream when men give attention to hot women.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:11 PM
7

Women have been losing their shit about unfair beauty standards and how it's men's fault that girls have eating disorders for years. That's what I'm talking about. The term "fatphobia" was not something men came up with, for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:10 PM
20

There was/is a whole cultural movement for several decades about how men have unreasonable expectations for female beauty standards and how that's awful and they need to be educated to change.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:08 PM
16

Because women act like male attraction to attractive women is some kinda of cruel discriminatory practice we should be ashamed of?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:37 PM
3

I mean, it's not "normal" to have non-monogamous relationships either, but very few people here would really freak out about that except for certain trad red-pilled guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:18 PM
3

Alright now that's just an unfair implication. There's a huge gap between "I try not to get deeply invested in my partners" and "I'm a sadistic, narcissistic, machiavellian, psychopath". If I weren't nice to the women I date they wouldn't want to date me.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:16 PM
4

You don't have to validate anything, but given this sub's general "Nobody's entitled to love or affection" attitude, I'm surprised this is even remotely controversial.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 04:56 PM
2

Nah I meant going on dates and stuff. Sex is like, more of a chore than anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 04:41 PM
2

tbh I think people way overplay how bad "empty" connections are. It's still fun going through the motions even if there's nothing more at the end of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 04:22 PM
2

<image>
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 04:14 PM
2

This is kinda just a "water is wet" type post. I feel like the comparison between dating and "you need for years of work experience for your first job" type stuff is well known at this point. Reposted under automod
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:53 PM
1

This is why I just never get attached or emotionally invested in my partners in the first place 😎
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:51 PM
5

As the other poster said, most of the men you're talking about weren't even born when those standards were enforced. Stop gloating about our suffering because other people who aren't us were unfair to women in the previous fucking century.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:29 PM
11

Love the tacit implication that adult men and women are somehow below average lol It reads like you're implying barely legal boys the most attractive and women are just all more willing to settle for partners in their age range than men are.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:16 PM
1

I think women probably very rarely experience men feigning interest in a second or third date out of fear for their own safety, yes. Men pretty much never have the "I was afraid!!" excuse for being rude the way women do. And yes, I can simultaneously be annoyed at how women behave on/after dates, while also being annoyed at how hard it is to get a date. I don't have to silently tolerate infinite shit falling on me just because there's an asymmetry to how many men want relationships compared to w…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:09 PM
1

This reaction from this intense rejection sensitivity can be scary for women. Okay so in general I get it, but I think women take this too far a lot of the time. There is a limit where reasonable precautions for your own safety roll over into cruelty. Like, a lot of times I've gone on a first or second date with a girl, and she's ended the date by spontaneously saying "We should totally do this again sometime" only to ghost me or immediately hit me with a wall of text about how I'm really sweet …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 02:53 PM
–

Okay but if there were, would that statistical fact make you empathetic and patient with racists?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:47 AM
–

Can you be empathetic toward and patient with racists?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:41 AM
1

Actually, I was confused by your previous reply, I wasn't talking about kink. But I think my confusion is actually relevant. There's vanilla "submissive" women, and then there's **submissive** women in kink spaces, and while there's a niche for **submissive** men in kink spaces, there's almost no hope for vanilla "submissive" men who are neither traditionally masculine nor interested in kink. And then a lot of these vanilla dudes find their way into kink spaces because there's nowhere else that …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 01:09 PM
1

Yeah I mean, obviously trad couples aren't interested in being subversive.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:54 PM
1

That's the perspective most dominant women share, whereas most dominant men expect very little from their female partners, which is what that feels so unfair.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:19 PM
0

To be fair, there is an annoying thing where submissive women are allowed to be lazy and passive, but submissive men are required to still be just as active and put just as much effort in (if not more) as dominant men. Like, no man is ever allowed to be lazy in bed the way women are.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 11:31 AM
1

Its not about just giving up, its about understanding perhaps you are {fundamentally unfixable}. While this is in many cases true, I don't think this is actually very good advice for autistic guys and will simply result in a lot more young autistic suicides if were put into practice as the boiler plate advice we give to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 05:42 AM
2

I think allegations you don't report to the police could reasonably be considered slander, yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 08:59 PM
2

Wanting a paternity test is asking "Did you cheat on me?". Suing for paternity fraud is affirmatively making the accusation "You cheated on me!". These are completely different, and I doubt many men would want to preemptively sue their wife for paternity fraud before getting a paternity test.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 08:49 PM
1

Your question was seemingly intentionally phrased to punish guys who honestly guessed wrong, while in discussions of paternity fraud, the assumption that it's bona fide fraud is implied by that fact that we're calling it fraud. Genuine good faith mistakes, by definition, cannot be fraud.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 07:54 PM
0

What should the punishment be for false accusations of paternity fraud? Either the same as paternity fraud itself or the same as any other knowingly false accusation of a crime. What should the penalty then be for men who demand a paternity test from women and turn out to be the father? This is a totally different question. The legal system generally doesn't punish honest mistakes, so if the father genuinely believed the accusation he was making, I don't think he should really be punished for be…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 07:21 PM
1

Is consentual sex just imaginary to people on this subreddit? Do I need to specify the word consentual in every discussion of sex? No, I am not comparing picking up laundry to rape. I am comparing being a little messy to not being in the mood very often: i.e. they are similar in that they are both normal, reasonable things to do/feel and if your partner gets mad at you for either of them then they're being shitty.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 05:30 PM
0

Okay. I think it's fairly obvious I was not talking about rape in my comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:15 PM
0

Why do you compare a desire for more frequent consentual sex to marital rape?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:34 PM
3

If it's such a bad self own, what's so unbelievable about it? Do you think mediocre but otherwise normal dudes are just all incels or something?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:25 PM
7

Uh, no? I never said women can't commit to men they don't desire. I'm literally just saying that lots of people decide to settle for various reasons, and that's okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:17 PM
1

Neither is having sex a couple times a week, but lots of people (myself included) would find that excessive. But if we're going to blame people for failing to meet other people's standards, then this is just how that principle is gonna play out.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:15 PM
7

What dude? Nah these are the reasons I can often get dates worth women who are out of my league.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:02 PM
6

Why couldn’t she get the guy she desires? She's not attractive enough? She's too shy? No attractive single guys in her area? To name a few possible reasons. And if he doesn’t line up with her goals then how would that possibly be a person they’d desire?! Because what people desire in a partner and what they want out of life doesn't always match perfectly? Relationships are messy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:38 PM
5

Lots of reasons actually. She might not be able to get the kind of guy she desires. The kind of guy she desires might be unsafe, or socially unacceptable, or doesn't line up with her goals, or she's just simply not in touch with her emotions and what she really desires. Happens all the time, in my experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:09 PM
2

Okay, so then it's women's faults for not wanting sex often enough. You can't be frigid and then complain that men's standards are too high. See how stupid this is?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 01:47 PM
4

I think one could equally make the argument that a lot of dudes who are really liberal when the chips are down roleplay as conservatives because it gives them a sense of masculinity, but they drop the act as soon as they have a relationship. A lot of guys talk a big game about wanting to be a provider to a submissive housewife on a farm, for example, when in reality they want to split the bill with a tomboyish girl and buy a modest house in the suburbs.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:02 AM
60

​Then you look at the average single guy online I think this is the real difference. Lonely men complain about their troubles in anonymous forums, while lonely women are more likely to vent to their friends and family. Rarely do dudes ever bring this sort of thing up in real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 01:49 AM
6

Second, Hinge is awful in general in my honest opinion. I have yet to hear good things about Hinge. In fact, I hear better things about Tinder. So yeah, Hinge has a bad ROI and having something casual wont help. I've honestly never heard anything bad about Hinge, and I get way more dates on there than on Bumble.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 06:38 PM
–

Would I want the woman I'm already with to get plastic surgery? Hell no. Would I care if a woman I was interested in had got plastic surgery done before we met? Not at all. There are plenty of pros and cons to getting any medical procedure done that you need to weigh for yourself, but the opinion of men likely isn't one of them in this case.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 03:18 AM
9

What on earth are you talking about? Approaching a woman who doesn't want to be approached isn't even anywhere near the same ballpark as sexual assault.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 09:09 PM
10

If a guy is on the margin, he isn’t a good guy. I'm talking about behavior, not character. It is generally wise to incentivise the behaviors you would like so see more of. missing out on a sexual opportunity isn’t as bad at all as assaulting someone. I never said or implied it was even comparable. You're the one who brought that up.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 08:07 PM
4

Yeah, and like, I just generally think society would be better if more people had realistic standards?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 06:18 PM
10

Because guys on the margin between being decent and being shitty respond to incentives, and encouraging these marginal men to be shitty results in more shitty men treating women poorly? And I think it would be good if women had fewer shitty guys to deal with?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 06:09 PM
2

Not really a problem, but it's equally valid for someone to wish that my standards were lower as it is for me to have those standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 05:16 PM
6

That's better than just talking about what you want. At least abstaining from dating has more than 0 effect on bad dudes, even if the rest of us are collateral damage.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 03:08 PM
4

Women keep telling men for ages what they want and they aren't listening. And instead of taking some accountability its always "well, what am I supposed to do?" The problem is that the good actors are already listening, and the bad actors don't care about what you want, so just talking about what you want without taking steps to modify the incentives at play is going to have next to no effect on the behavior of the men you have a problem with.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 02:51 PM
8

In democratic politics, every voter has equal leverage over their elected representative. In dating politics, women have much more leverage over men than men have over eachother. I can do basically nothing to effect the behavior of shitty pushy men because: A) they don't care about what I have to say as long as they get laid and B) I don't have the ability to observe or intervene when they're being shitty because they do it primarily in private with the women they're being shitty to. I am simply…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 02:33 PM
2

For most people, if they can’t find anyone they’re attracted to, they just stay single. Which sounds reasonable to me. Is that even true? The number of people in relationships is far higher than the number of people who are attractive. I'd bet the actual statistics show most people who are faced with a choice between settling and staying single end up choosing to settle.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 02:25 PM
18

Except that women's strategies for dealing with pushy men disproportionately punish decent guys instead of the pushy men you say are the problem. It's like if a store said they were raising their prices to combat theft. The thieves are still gonna pay 0 dollars, and many of your paying customers are gonna get priced out. Yes the thieves are still the bad actors responsible, but the shitty solution is creating a larger incentive to be a bad actor. I think it's perfectly reasonable to point out th…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 02:23 PM
25

Okay, but like, if I'm only attracted to 10/10 supermodels, I think we could both agree that my preferences aren't very realistic, are they?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 02:14 PM
10

Okay so, yes, men should back off when it seems like the woman they're interested in is uncomfortable. But at the same time, I think women have kinda created a problem where the most well meaning guys are gonna end up unnecessarily backing off when they misread playfulness or shyness as discomfort, while the guys who don't care about making women uncomfortable are going to just keep on going without a care in the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 02:09 PM
1

Alright yeah being married is a whole different ballgame, but outside of that it doesn't seem like a huge deal, personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 10:15 PM
-4

a relationship with a woman who's not passionately in love with you won't fill that hole, it'll just make the hole even bigger. As a dude who frequently finds himself in passionless relationships (not through any nefarious means, obviously) I don't know why people act like this is the worst thing in the world. It's not even worse than being single. As long as you know that's what's happening, it's perfectly comfortable. idk, maybe it sucks more for women to be in relationships like that, but my …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 08:29 PM
10

If "she's" going to complain about male behavior, it would behoove her to think about how her own actions might be reinforcing the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 12:28 PM
2

2. Even other guys say he’s the problem. This would seem to answer your question. 3. He’s doesnt act desperate. Acting desperate is one of the most unattractive things you can do in dating. Everyone knows this. 4. Men can cause women to be filtered out and not realize it. Sure. But at the same time, women can also get "filtered out" by unreasonably small things that happen to give them "the ick". 5. Having a “numbers game” mindset is really dumb. I agree, but the solution is being MORE picky, no…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 12:25 PM
6

Yes but as a man, my good decisions only affect the behavior of one man (myself). But any woman can influence the good/bad decisions of dozens of men be choosing what kinds of behaviors she wants to reward.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 12:17 PM
9

Yeah women really could do a lot more to discourage pieces of shit like OP instead of rewarding him.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 12:13 PM
1

The women going their own way are simply..staying single. The men going their own way spend every free minute bitching about women and not being able to date them. Sounds like a perfect example of how men care about women a whole lot more than women care about men.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 12:07 PM
–

They "joke" (hate) men who actually act decent towards women. You'll just have to decide whether you want to take my word for it or not, but I act decently to women, and I feel much more hate directed at me by women than by sexist men.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 12:00 PM
-3

The way people love puppies is one of the purest, most selfless forms of love in the animal kingdom. The fact that men's love is analogous to this and women's love isn't is direct evidence that they are not morally equivalent.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:35 AM
–

Extremely hot women are extremely hot. Average women are average. Extremely hot men are extremely hot. Average men disgusting. That's the difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 10:34 PM
1

Yeah, violence is pretty much it. And yeah, I don't think there's any good solutions. Stuff is just gonna suck for a whole lot of people for the foreseeable future.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 06:01 PM
1

All of the things men are good at are problems modern society has mostly invented solutions for. For example, violence is basically always counterproductive in a civilized society.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 05:48 PM
0

There is no benefit in modern society for men <doing things men are evolved to do> This is the real problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 03:21 PM
–

Even if you are hot and have good pictures, you could easily get lost in the mix of so many men. For those of us who aren't blessed with good looks, this is one of the reasons the apps are so preferable.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 02:53 PM
1

Nah, my buddy had a serious fear of gods and religion because some PC ROM game he played as a kid fucked him up, but he couldn't remember which one. Eventually we were able to help him figure out it wasn't God, but the character Chuck Cheddar from Pajama Sam that had traumatized him, but it was real.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:27 PM
14

They are not interested in how the political climate has impacted casual sex. I don't mean to be so confrontational, but did you miss the last 10 years of men complaining about how feminism and #MeToo have impacted dating? Not saying you have to agree with their conclusions, but they definitely think about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:24 PM
3

This is stupid. Lots of people are traumatized by things like watching a horror movie too early but can't remember what movie it was.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:19 PM
15

You're trying to weed out men who listen to what women say and believe them?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 09:32 PM
7

I certainly don't think anyone would lament our absence.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 09:16 PM
1

I dunno, same as anything other social interaction. You can just feel it when someone's not into you or finds it uncomfortable. It's not rocket science.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 09:13 PM
9

Men not being valuable is what's causing frustrations.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 07:25 PM
–

Honestly sex kinda creeps me out anyway so even once a month is probably more than I'd be comfortable with.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 07:20 PM
3

Not really. Women agree to dates with guys they're not really attracted to all the time. As a "meh" but nonthreatening guy who appears to have his life on track, the majority of women who agree to go out with me are clearly just tolerating me. It's not the end of the world, but it still sucks.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 06:54 PM
0

I think that's kinda a privileged perspective. Being the one asked out is always easier than doing the asking. As a dude, I just have to accept the reality that some portion of women are gonna accept my invitation to dinner even though I'm just "meh" except there's even a good chance they'll expect me to pay for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 06:08 PM
3

I mean, you have the ability to set the pace of the relationship though. If a girl just asked me out to dinner, I'm not gonna think she's hoe unless she does something weird like being overtly sexual.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:41 PM
4

Okay, so that's why this hypothetical woman would stay with me in this scenario, but why would she be with me in the first place if she's had past partners she was more attracted to?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:34 PM
9

Okay so you just make blatantly contradictory statements in a single paragraph and I'm supposed to know which ones are serious points and which ones are a rhetorical bait? Be real. You can't seriously expect people to parse your posts when you structure them like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:18 PM
18

You literally said : No, I dont think a boy who is always told by family he is special, handsome, smart, sweet, and “any girl would be lucky to have him” is a problem. The problem is that his family rarely ever told him “hey! Youre being a little shit. STOP IT!”. Stop moving the goalpost back and forth.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:56 PM
5

If I'm not her best, why the hell is she with me and not him? My money? Yeah, THAT sure seems like foundation for a healthy relationship /s. Like honestly, I can settle for being settled for, but I don't have to be jazzed about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:48 PM
–

Nah man, the complete lack of any female attention for the entire rest of my life is all I need to know that's not true. I might be slightly above average, but not by much.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:34 PM
2

Do men spend time learning about what women like? It's like all they talk about on 4chan these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:39 AM
2

So are men happy being considered attractive but no one wants to be around him? Yes. Are men happy being considered attractive but doesn’t want to fuck him? Yes. Similarly, does what to fuck him, because he’s attractive, but wants to take things slow to get to know him for a couple of months? Yes. Would guys be fine hearing “He’s so hot….but he’s a broke ass bum and I can get someone just as hot but with money”? Yes. Hope this clears things up for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 05:04 PM
6

Not sex specifically, but every woman I've ever dated has wanted me to escalate physical intimacy faster than I've been comfortable with. I think the difference is actually just that men have a far greater tolerance for low libido women than women have for low libido men, so women get on reddit to complain about it more. I don't even think it's that I have a lower libido than any of these women, or that the men being complained about on r/deadbedrooms do. I think women are just completely unfami…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:47 PM
2

I dunno dude, I just read another thread on here talking about how insecure/low confidence men deserve to be rejected because they inevitably ask stupid questions like this, so I'm gonna say that any woman who asks this question as anything but a joke should be dumped on the spot.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:29 PM
9

It's their own fault they're never given a chance?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 06:47 AM
10

Sorry, and what exactly are misogynistic incels wrong about? It sounds like you're trying to prove them right.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:52 AM
–

Except in this scenario, one innocent person is getting shafted either way, so the real calculation is whether to reward the bad person or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:34 AM
–

You get no gold stars for offering protection when you're the reason why it's needed to begin with But like, I'm not the reason it's needed though?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:23 AM
–

Women are sex objects, men are violence objects. More news 11.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:20 AM
–

Nah, justice is justice. Having criminal parents sucks and puts you at a disadvantage for life, but that's no reason not to punish criminals.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:15 AM
1

Because generally the solution to collective action problems is coordination, not wordlessly throwing yourself upon the sword to make a point.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:07 AM
–

Bro that is literally the point of this thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 04:41 PM
–

Alien is actually the one I had in mind when I was making the post. My mom always thinks it's funny to tell people those movies are much, much scarier if you watch them while pregnant like she did.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 04:37 PM
1

Okay you seem to be badly misinterpreting my post. That was not a standard set by women. Women did not want to be beaten and murdered, no matter how much you fantasize they they love being abused. I was never saying anything like that. The devaluation of women's lives and health was obviously a result of the patriarchy, and it's among the parts of patriarchy I think pretty much everyone is glad to see abolished. There are certain other aspects of patriarchy though, that women have generally been…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:14 AM
–

Well, men with Klinefelter syndrome (XXY chromosomes) have similar rates of auto immune disorders to women. So that seems pretty conclusive to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:00 PM
–

I think you're reaching a bit trying to connect this to sociology. It seems far more likely to me that it has to do with the fact that women's bodies are set up to be able to have a whole nother genetically distinct person's body inside of them for time to time. So you'd expect they'd have pretty funky immune systems. Then there's the fact their cells have 2 different X chromosomes to express, which means they end up with a mosaic of certain X-linked traits being expressed (that's why calico cat…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 10:58 PM
3

Men in the past were permitted to be absolutely terrible to their wives and children. I’m also really curious why you think it is so horribly cruel and unfair that (as you believe) feminists have forced you to also be kind and respectful. Actually no. I think it's so horribly cruel and unfair that feminists continue to force me to be dominant and in charge, despite talking a big game about abolishing patriarchal gender norms. As a guy who just naturally isn't like that, it's among the single mos…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:36 PM
17

Oh if even those women aren't picking you, maybe....maybe...maybe you're a shitty dude?? Next time someone complains about how people act like the only reason a man could be romantically unsuccessful is if he's a bad person, and a bunch of blue pillers chime in about how that's made up and nobody says that, would you mind popping in to say "It's me, I say that." so we can all move on to more substantive discussions? That'd be really cool of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:25 PM
5

It's a collective action problem. Men as a whole would be better off if we got rid of this contradiction, but it's in my individual self-interest to play the game the way it currently is because I want affection from women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:55 PM
5

Sorry, why are quakers considered scum all of the sudden?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:58 AM
65

Feminism has set up a bunch of new more egalitarian gender norms men have to follow. This would be totally fine if feminism had successfully killed the old gender norms, but instead what feminism really did is set up a second parallel set of norms I have to fulfill alongside the old ones. I have to be emotionally vulnerable while still being stoic. I have to be kind and respectful while still taking charge and being dominant. I have to dangerous without being threatening. I have to be surprising…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:56 AM
13

Yes, but you are what you do, and asking men to repeatedly make women uncomfortable in public will inevitably form a groove in their brains where they view women's feelings as less legitimate. Like, there is very little risk to my wellbeing if I make a woman uncomfortable. The only reason I avoid doing it is purely out of empathy. Half the reason misogyny exists is because heterosexual dating demands that we turn off that part of our brains all the time. Doubly so for neurodivergent guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:58 PM
4

It’s fairly simple actually, you don’t view them as “women” but as people, you don’t view any interactions with them as having a purpose or goal. If you see someone with a Star Wars t-shirt, you simply say “hey nice t-shirt” Okay this is interesting. I would never say something like that to a man I didn't know. I've noticed women seem to complement random other women's fashion choices quite often, but as a dude, striking up a conversation about some stranger's T-shirt is something I would never …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:24 PM
25

I think your experience as a woman is just radically different from a neurodivergent guy like OP's. He doesn't wanna risk any action that could reveal his interest in a woman, even just in a friendly passing comment. Because from his perspective, interacting with women non-platonically is like one of those crocodile games where you push its teeth down until a random one makes it bite you with no warning.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:19 PM
–

Men choose not to pursue education. Okay so why the fuck are there still government grants subsidizing women's access to education? Why the fuck were there EVER government grants subsidizing women's access to education?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:09 PM
–

Why is men working for the good of society contingent on having access to women's bodies? It's really simple actually. If you can't get access to a woman's body, it's clearly because you're a bad person with bad hygiene and you need to go to therapy. Men are constantly told their value as human beings is intrinsically linked to their ability to get access to a woman's body by the very feminists who have the biggest issue with male behavior. The end result is that lonely men listen to what women …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:05 PM
1

I think a 2:1 sex ratio is more reasonable. Either way, once they figure out how to either selectively kill Y-chromosome bearing sperm cells or how to fertilize an egg with another egg, men will go nearly extinct very quickly and women will have the utopia they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 03:25 PM
5

Okay this is a huge disconnect on this subreddit. Complaining about how other people choose to exercise their rights is no the same as infringing on them. Even saying that you think it's morally wrong or disgusting to exercise certain rights isn't infringing on them. 95% of the time, when a guy says "Oh woe is me, girls should be less picky!" he's literally just saying he wishes women were less picky. He's not saying he wants women to be stripped of their right to choose who they have sex with.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 11:03 PM
5

I put respectful in quotes because the men that don’t approach aren’t actually respectful, they’re just scared. But now they’re realizing that too. lmao you just HAD to kick at the guys who are already down, huh? You are exactly the villain redpillers say you are. Anyway, it's not dying out, it's just reaching critical mass to the point where people are starting to talk about it. That's not the same as it going away or even slowing down.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:20 PM
1

So then why are you acting like being around average height is somehow unusual? I am, as the title of your post says, a regular average guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:06 PM
1

That's cool, and I feel for you bro, but 5'9" is literally below average where I live.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 12:01 PM
3

I just only send likes to girls I think are likely to like me back. That's what I mean by picky. Sometimes that means passing on women who I think are out of my league, but the result has been getting several matches a day whenever I decide to do some swiping.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:43 AM
1

Nah bro, I literally look like Ed Sheeran.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:15 AM
2

Bro 5'11" is literally 1 inch above average for Canada. I'm not tall.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:09 AM
1

5'11"
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 03:15 AM
9

So, I STRONGLY doubt I am a top-tier guy who hit the genetic lottery. I make okay money, and I absolutely do not have my entire life perfectly sorted out. But I get plenty of matches. I would say about half of the likes I send out end up as matches, give or take. I don't think dating apps are universally a scam. The only reason so many guys struggle with dating apps is because they think it's just a lottery and they're not picky enough, so the algorithm penalizes them. The real hard part is gett…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:54 PM
4

If you were in a class or a club, and some random guy joined just to hit on women, would you feel comfortable with him around?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 05:05 PM
6

You know what? It IS cool and masculine. My mother is currently dying of pancreatic cancer, and I know that when she passes I will be in complete shambles for a while. But until then, I derive great personal satisfaction from being an immovable stone and doing everything I can to make the final months of her life as happy and comfortable as possible. Spending all day coping and crying about it would just add to her problems. Being stoic and a cool sigma-dewalt-alpha-uber male is actually really …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:54 PM
2

I'm 26 0 approaches 0 results from those 0 approaches When the fuck am I gonna approach a woman? Just join a pottery a club and start hitting on the women who are there to relax and do some pottery? lmao no way.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:29 PM
3

A guy can ask a woman out and then show zero interest outside of a sexual encounter. This is called “sex-zoning,” and it happens far more often than you might think. Never done it. Don't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:23 PM
8

Hope this helps: How should a male navigate a situation where the woman is flatter than average? Say I have a first date with a girl, everything goes well but then I realize I wish her boobs were bigger. This has honestly been a fear of mine in dating. You can have whatever feelings and preferences you have, and you can break up with anyone for any reason at any time, but at the same time, if you feel guilty about breaking up for a particular reason, perhaps that is your conscience telling you s…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:21 PM
23

This. The thought "No I'd just be bothering her." is what stops most awkward guys from getting women, and the easiest solution is to just become sexist and stop caring about how she feels, which is not a good state of affairs.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:15 PM
–

I think you're probably right in the long run. They'll find a way to put two eggs together to make an embryo and men will go extinct not long after.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 06:52 AM
–

The whole argument just boils down to whatever your position on the "Trans women are/aren't women" question. There can be no productive downstream policy discussions until society has broadly agreed on an answer to that question. That debate is outside the scope of this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 06:46 AM
3

Women seem to have a very hard time predicting if a guy will be physically abusive, but a very easy time finding red flags that have nothing to do with being physically abusive, such as mumbling. Actually, is this whole thread just ragebait? It is, isn't it?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:04 PM
6

When I was in my first year of college, I had a crush on a girl in my program. We hung out a lot and had lunch together and stuff, but the microsecond she told me she was so glad to have "such a good friend" I ghosted her and never spoke to her again. I still feel kinda bad about it but the way people talk about "nice guys" honestly makes me think there's no winning as a man. No matter what you do interacting with a woman you have feelings for, it's the wrong thing. And at a certain point I thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 04:48 PM
3

Nah I care about people, it's just that when it comes to a lot of being women's issues, I'm powerless to affect things in any way. Most of these problems are acts committed in private by who aren't me, and whom I'll never meet. Women complain their partners don't do an equal share of chores, well that sucks. I literally can't do anything to fix that though.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 04:37 PM
0

According to observing the way people talk about this issue. If a man pushes on his partner's boundaries by threatening to leave if she doesn't give him more sex, then he's implicitly bad and he's part of the reason women are reaching out to women, especially online, and encouraging them not to compromise. But if a woman pushes on her partner's boundaries by threatening to leave because she doesn't get enough sex, well then "anyone has the right to leave a relationship at any time if they’re not…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 04:33 PM
-3

Men should take current problems seriously: harassment, violence, unequal domestic labor, reproductive rights, and sexist behavior from other men. Okay genuine question that maybe deserves its own thread, but why should I care about any of those things? I do care obviously, but only because I care about a lot of things that I realistically shouldn't. But in like a real intellectual sense, why should I care about any of those when the only thing I can control is my own conduct. All I can really d…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 04:01 PM
20

Some of the time. It just depends. Personally I'm lucky that there seems to be a lot of overlap between the types of women I secretly obsess over, and the types of women I can have. Will update you on marriage if that ever comes up for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:54 AM
-1

And yet, if a man leaves a relationship because he wants more sex, he's a pig. This "anyone can do anything" rhetoric only ever gets deployed to defend women. It's stupid and childish.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:38 AM
-2

Why is it, culturally speaking, that when the woman doesn't want sex, the man needs to just live with it, but when the man doesn't want sex, the woman has every right to leave the relationship because her needs aren't being met?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 01:44 AM
2

🤮
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 09:01 PM
6

Had me going for a second there reading that little blurb. Your imitation of ChatGPT's weird cadence is so good I almost threw up reading it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 08:54 PM
4

I dunno. Skill issue I guess. Or they're over 30 with different social norms. But Gen Z dating is like, we split the bill 75% of the time in my experience. One girl even insisted on paying for me and I had to bargain down to alternating every other date.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:49 PM
2

Yeah, and most people (or at least most men) need a romantic partner to not die of depression.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:25 PM
5

This is just not reality in my experience. Most women are happy to split the bill or alternate who pays every other date. It's only trad-rightwingers (cringe) who still have this expectation, and ironically, I would say that THESE are the most masculine women, and not in a fun or appealing way.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:22 PM
2

Yes, I wouldn't be here if the discussion weren't entertaining Why do you still want a job when you complain about working? Just go be unemployed and stop complaining.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:14 PM
11

Men rarely "miss" red flags. We just ignore them because we don't have the latitude to be that picky.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:14 AM
14

Women not wanting to split the bill indicates that they're annoying and I probably won't wanna waste my time with someone like that. I'm not running a soup kitchen.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 08:55 PM
1

Then you have even less of an excuse for being this out of touch with reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 08:51 PM
–

It's less common, but it happens. For a celebrity example, lots of people think Marisa Tomei is more attractive now than she was in her 20s. And like personally, I've always preferred to date women who are 1-2 years older than me. P.S. anyone who tells you dating girls older than you is easier is fckin lying. Very few women want to date men even a year younger than themselves, despite all the seething online about men seemingly always dating younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:45 PM
1

Part of how women are able to thrive without men and without sex is because of their social circle of support. The larger part of it is because many of them just don't like men very much in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:17 AM
1

Yeah, and my post was asking about what they may or may not find to be positive. Because I was curious. I would like to hear the opinions of women from this subreddit on this topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 05:56 AM
-6

I mean, you entirely dismissed the possibility that women's standards are the problem, which only leaves men not being good enough as the only other source of problem. What solutions do you propose other than the ones I put in my post?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:42 PM
1

The data does not show that Gen Z couples are way more likely to have started off as friends. In 2024, 60.76% of couples met online, and 46% of Gen Z is single.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:16 PM
-4

I mean to be fair, if you had a son who was struggling to find a girlfriend, I really doubt you (or pretty much any other woman) would tell your hypothetical son "Well sweetie, you're not entitled to a relationship. You should learn to be happy without romance in your life." That kind of advice is reserved more or less exclusively for getting lonely men on the internet to shut up. Now, I think OP is a little crazy for complaining that parents have more empathy for their children than they do for…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:08 PM
2

Realest answer so far.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 10:54 PM
-2

Because I think there almost certainly better at some things you are better at than women, and some things you are worse at than women. You might be equal in aggregate, but there are obviously some areas of distinction.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 10:47 PM
5

Bruh the number of women I see seething about guys playing videogames or having sparsely furnished apartments is INSANE. I think you just don't see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 07:27 PM
-2

Except that it can only imply they're equal if there are absolutely no negatives in the list, and I very much doubt women would say there are no negative traits about men.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:57 PM
2

I see the point you're making, and you're right. Obviously you, a presumably typical woman who happens to be carrying a gun, are not more masculine than an unarmed Macho Man Randy Savage. I didn't mean to imply the capacity for violence is all there is to masculinity. I was just saying that it is a significant part of it, but not the whole show.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:50 PM
2

Yeah, and everyone is a little bit masculine and a little bit feminine. All else being equal, I would say that the version of you who is prepared to use a gun is ever so slightly more masculine than the hypothetical version of you who isn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:39 PM
2

Yeah, kinda? Like, choosing nonviolence is certainly more masculine than being incapable of violence.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:29 PM
6

If you make a mental list of all the ways men are different from women, and you don't find any of them to be positive, doesn't that necessarily imply you think men are strictly worse than women?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:57 PM
7

Sorry dude, but no. As a man who's naturally pretty reserved, women either just assume I'm not interested, or feel that there's "no chemistry". If I don't force myself to make things easy for her, things go nowhere. You just have two people sitting at a restaurant waiting for the other to make a move.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:45 PM
12

(like a coworker, a classmate, a fellow member in a chess club, or even a friend) My dude, half of Gen Z is already finished college and unemployed. They don't have classmates or coworkers. Look man, I'm sure you think you're providing the wisdom of experience, but you just don't know enough to know what you don't know. Society is not like it was when you were a college grad in the 90s or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:37 PM
1

I've got ADHD and a coordination disorder, so I think it's just an extention of the fact my brain is a little undercooked compared to normal people.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 02:07 AM
1

Yeah sorry, that's what I was trying to say when I called myself an outlier. And that's very nice of you to say, but I don't think being uncomfortable with something as universally important as sex is a good thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:25 AM
5

I'm not really fully on board with all the redpill talking points, but as an "outlier" myself, here's my two cents: Some people are just wired different/wrong from the get go. Obviously trauma is a part of it for some people, but I think people tend to overestimate that because they like having neat little explanations for things. Like personally, I was never abused or anything. I think my brain is just set up wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 11:46 PM
6

​ Women absolutely love intimacy and romance just as much as men, I think this a flawed assumption, and this is the root of your confusion. As far as I know, the stats show pretty clearly that women are much happier to just be single than men are.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:53 PM
1

Yeah, I think I'd be way more uncomfortable getting unwanted attention if it came with a serious risk of violence. That's why I always find making jokes about like "lol what if I were a serial killer" when it comes to dating really uncouth.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:38 PM
-4

tbh I've been hit on by women I deem unattractive and it's like, slightly uncomfortable but mostly just funny. Granted I'm not really in any physical danger if I piss a woman off, but still.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 02:44 PM
-6

Women have the leverage to decide what is and isn't shamed, and men don't. It's just the way it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 02:40 PM
1

Not disagreeing, but just for clarity, I was thinking of a trend in political focus groups I've seen people talk about where older women are more likely to make excuses for Trump's misogyny and history of sexual assault, compared to younger women who have significantly less tolerance for that kind of behavior. Then again, perhaps people compartmentalize more than I realize, and their political views are more or less totally separate from the advice they give to family members. idk...
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 02:32 PM
3

Okay, obviously the experience of misogyny is separate from reading things online. But I think it's telling that older women who lived in more explicitly misogynistic times have a higher opinion of men than the women who live in today's obviously more egalitarian society. Clearly online discussions have done something to gender relations that can't be explained by real life behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 01:19 AM
5

Alright man, I don't even understand how you can interpret that as bad faith. But if your spidersense has gone off, you do you.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 01:12 AM
6

How? My entire original post was all about how interpreting online posts as accurate windows into the lives of the opposite gender is bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 12:49 AM
3

True-ish, but I think in primarily same-sex social spaces, people act differently and talk about things more carelessly. So having these same-sex social spaces be observable to the opposite sex leads to warped perceptions of reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 12:46 AM
5

I think it's kinda funny that you think viral online posts are broadly representative of how women feel, when there've been several threads in the last few days centered around the OP's failure to understand that women are not a monolith. I'm sure for example, that many women are comfortable with a kiss or something on a first date, and many women would find it very offputting, but only the latter group is going to complain about it on reddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 12:44 AM
1

No actually, the reason I didn't talk as much about men's private views of women is because I think it's fairly obvious and direct how some incels posting about subjugating women leads women to believe men today broadly support that.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 12:37 AM
1

I dunno dude, I'm 26 and I usually date girls 1-2 years older than me, and I haven't really had any issues. Like there are plenty of problems in the dating market right now, but I don't think zoomettes dating old geezers is really that prevalent.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 04:56 PM
8

the ones who look happier are those that the woman is kinda dumb/mildly incompetent and the man is basically superman Just be superman and go for dumb/ mildly incompetent women. Got it. First honest piece of advice on this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 10:07 AM
6

Would you be okay with “any woman” if she insisted on taking things slow? Yes. Bold of you to assume I'm not the one insisting on taking things slow, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 10:08 PM
–

This is known. Source: i like being told what to do :/
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 05:49 AM
1

Yeah actually, I do think it's fair to compare compelled access to someone's private property with compelled access to someone's body. Your body is intrinsically your own property after all. That's why you can donate organs. And either way, it's not actually relevant because my point is about how people discuss societal violence in response to disparities in life satisfaction. In both cases, the use of violence is morally wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 03:37 AM
15

Just look at Ghislaine Maxwell. My understanding is that according to a lot of the victims, Ghislane was actually the mastermind of that whole operation.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 01:11 AM
9

"If the 1% don't share their prosperity, then the widespread societal suffering will lead to spontaneous violence." Wooo yeah based critique of late stage capitalism! "If women choose to condemn a large portion of men to pointless, isolated lives, then the widespread societal suffering will lead to spontaneous violence." Ew you just admitted MEN are the problem because they're so disgusting and violent!!1!!!111 The only conclusion I can draw from this dichotomy is that clearly the violence we're…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 03:25 PM
1

I pretty much only use apps. It's much easier to get a first date when you know every woman you're talking to is interested in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 07:34 PM
–

This is also something I noticed with nice girls too. They’re mad that their hotness, sexual availability, nice clothes, doesn’t result in boyfriends/emotional intimacy. Men are not vending machines you feed sex tokens into and get kindess out of.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 05:58 PM
5

Nope. You can't trick me. I'm not falling for this no matter how many redditors try to convince me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 01:59 AM
2

Cheating is different from non-monogamy. Gays also dislike being cheated on, I assure you. I would bet if you look at super attractive men in relationships with less attractive women, they probably are slightly more likely to be in open relationships compared to the average dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 03:25 PM
2

Yeah obviously. I'm not saying women want men to die or anything crazy like that. I'm just saying society as a whole has a higher tolerance for male deaths. Yes war crimes happen, but the inspire a totally different reaction from society compared to male combat deaths. If a country kills 200 women in even an accidental bombing, it's outrageous and becomes a huge motivator for the target nation. If that same country kills 5000 soldier in a single night, it's just a statistic. Women's deaths are j…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 03:19 PM
1

my fear is that men just think “hot girl. Okay let me try to jump through the hoops I think she wants and act however will get me the opportunity to try to sleep with her” It's more like "Hot girl. Okay let me try to jump through the hoops I think she wants and act however will get me the opportunity to get dinner with her so we can have a real conversation in person." Like this is probably TMI, but sex kinda creeps me out and I'm not that into it. And yet, I still have to jump through all the s…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:42 AM
2

Women suffering and dying as a result of misogyny is bad. American abortion laws are bad. My comment was solely addressing the narrow claim that misandry does not lead to large scale violence against men. Women and children dying is obviously awful, but I would point out that rape and the intentional killing of civilians are botb near-universally considered warcrimes, whereas the male soldiers are considered "fair game." Men at war are the only type of people society considers "okay" to kill en …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:20 AM
7

Because I don't like being made uncomfortable and so I aim to avoid subjecting other people to things I would not like being subjected to?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 10:02 PM
14

Women are not taken seriously but their lives aren't treated as expendable. Men are taken seriously but their lives are treated as expendable. misogyny has repeatedly translated into large scale violence against women in ways that misandry has not. There is currently mass violence against men happening in Ukraine right now. Violence against women is bad, and war doesn't change that, but it's incredibly blind to pretend gender has nothing to do with the fact that society is totally comfortable fe…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 09:44 PM
5

Sure. Why wouldn't I?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 05:07 PM
7

And I think many men would be okay with that if they had as easy a time attracting women as women do attracting men. The main reason straight men are opposed to open relationships is the totally lopsided access to sexual partners. If dudes could pick up women super easily they would care less about monogamy, as evidenced by the gay community.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:37 PM
15

I hate being expected to be the brave one who makes the first move. It might surprise some women here, but I actually do see women as people and I don't like making people feel uncomfortable, so I hate having to be the one to make every move because no matter how much mental calculus I do to determine if she's going to be cool with it or if Jupiter is solar alignment or whatever, I'm still expected to repeatedly risk making the person I like very uncomfortable if I've gambled wrong. I don't like…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:14 PM
11

Because it seems like the happiness and fulfillment of each gender is only possible if the other one suffers. Men are only happy if women are forced into relationships by economic necessity, and women are only happy if they have the freedom to be single, leaving a large chunk of men unloved and depressed. Yes I know these two scenarios are not morally eqivalent. I'm not saying they are. It's just depressing.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:02 PM
7

I mean, gay men seem very happy dating dating people with male libidos. I think you're imagining red pill dudes are a lot more representative than they actually are.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 03:50 PM
15

Yeah. I'm really not feeling optimistic about the future of gender relations lol
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 08:09 AM
58

I had a whole elaborate thing typed out, but honestly dude, men want women to want them. That it. That's all there is to it. Until the day the average woman is somehow maniacally ravenous for the average men the way men are for women, there's going to be a lot of unhappy men on earth.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 07:24 AM
5

They literally do, you just take issue with people using flower language like "intimacy", "compatibility", and "a love full of passion" when they're discussing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 06:59 PM
5

I mean, to be fair that Drake example is mostly reviled by everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 04:56 PM
6

Polyamory and open relationships are something you should discuss LONG before you even consider getting married. They're not really relevant here.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 04:38 PM
2

Uh, the title "The entire strategy men are going for in life is to trade women like pokemon cards." does kind of betray your true feelings on the topic. That's not exactly a value-neutral thread title.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 04:07 PM
6

Uh, sorry but if your marriage is a religious ceremony, it absolutely is. Sex within a marriage is so culturally significant we have the specific phrase "to consummate a marriage." In some countries such as England and Wales, refusal to consummate your marriage is legally grounds for annulment. Cultural norms around marriage obviously change, but I think to say sex isn't built into the assumptions is a little naive. It's as dumb as a man saying "ANY PERSON WHO MARRIES FOR AN EQUAL SHARE OF HOUSE…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 03:59 PM
3

Women have also been telling men to raise their standards for forever too. Why shouldn't a guy sleep around for fun and wait until he finds a woman he really likes before he commits? In all seriousness, I think if you look at the entire opposite gender and don't find anyone that meets your standards, it's a you problem. Men who fail to commit are choosing to do so, and women who fail to commit are choosing to do so.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 03:45 PM
3

They do, absolutely. The issue is that a lot of them have found that there is not anybody worth committing to. One could say the same about men though, no? I don't really see a meaningful distinction between not wanting to commit and not wanting to commit because your standards are so high nobody reaches them. It kinda sounds like post hoc rationalizations for just not wanting to commit.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 03:34 PM
–

Man, now I'm just imagining the dogpile that would occur if a dude said just about any famous woman was a literal ghoul.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 07:54 AM
1

I think women are laughing at men who whine about not being picked. Damn we can't even complain about being lonely without being laughed at? That feels a little harsh.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 07:43 AM
1

Why would a woman want you? What does liking you look like? You seem to have stumbled across the fact that being unattractive is a deeply unpleasant experience. All I will say here is that I wish I had the type of personality women find attractive, but short of a brain injury that makes me into a completely different person, therexs nothing that's going to stop me from thinking "God, I wish a girl would just like me for who I am."
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 07:34 AM
1

Sorry totally random, but do people really widely consider Zendaya more attractive than Tom Holland? Like, she's an attractive woman, sure, but I've never seen anyone pining for her the way I see a lot of women I know irl adore Tom Holland. I always assumed the conventional wisdom was the other way around.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 07:26 AM
1

I mean, do most women want to commit? I hear all the time about how more and more women are happier being single now that they no longer financially require a man. Doesn't that kind of imply that in the past the only reason women committed to relationships with men was out of necessity? Now I suppose the real question is, why would men set up a society where people are required to pair up and commit, if they don't want to commit?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 07:19 AM
1

Honestly, I think if you're just mindful of how the person being scrutinized might be feeling, the rest will just come naturally. And I think the asymmetry comes from the fact that women don't really give you the chance to get to know them until you've won them over. Like, for example on dating apps I prefer getting to know women before asking them out, but in order to not get ghosted I have to turn the charm up to 110% from the minute we start texting or she'll get bored. So in order for the co…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 07:12 AM
–

I don't even do any of those tactics (except for acting flakey, but that's a personality flaw and not a deliberate strategy on my part) but like, I'm pretty sure they probably work on certain types of women. I think a lot of these are also popular because being mean to women has a feedback loop in your brain that makes you care about them less as people, and caring about women less makes rejection less scary, and not being afraid of rejection makes you more confident, and being confident is attr…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 04:19 PM
1

Yeah it is a bit of a dilemma because it is just the reality of things that women have to scrutinize men, but at the same time that scrutiny feels awful to be on the receiving end of. I don't really have a solution there. It just sucks. Anyway, to answer your main question: I think part of the problem is that as I understand it, women seem to view sex and romance as seperate in way that men just don't. Like, it's not that men value sex over romance, but that to men, sex is a structural part of w…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 04:03 PM
3

I swear that paper has to be trying to bait out more violence against women or something. The have to see how cutting 50% of all people out of society is going to end badly. If you're a mother, what is the point is raising your sons right if their only future is to jerk off with robot sex dolls in isolation? Every generation of men would become a social dead end, never contributing to the next generation and therefore not worthy of investment in the present. It would be pure evil.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:06 AM
6

I don't know if this is helpful, but ask yourself, with your low opinion of men and resentment, would you be a good partner? If your care, empathy, sensitivity, etc is reserved only for women, does it even count? Now think about being a man navigating dating with women who share your resentfullness. Would you be able to stick to your principles if people were always treating you like they assume you're an asshole before they even give you the chance to make an impression? It really wears you dow…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 06:49 AM
2

Western men are used to being treated like shit too, western women seem to take afront to western men saying we're going to date women who are nicer to us. See how unproductive this is?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:57 AM
24

This is gonna sound weird, but I think men and women basically hate eachother by about the same amount everywhere, the difference is that men in oppressive traditionalist countries are GENUINELY terrible, so when a girl from an oppressive country moves to a liberal country, she is shocked and amazed by how the men treat her. The dudes from the that country, meanwhile, are still terrible, so they think women demanding basic respect is misandry and don't appreciate the women of their culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 05:32 PM
–

Uh, did you read my comment? I have plenty of female friends, I just don't think having female friends is "useful" when it comes to dating. But as I said, I'm friends with people because I like them, not because they're useful.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:44 PM
–

Yeah, but knowing how to talk and socialize and be enjoyable around women is also step one for being friends with women. So I think it's the overlapping skillsets that matter, and not a cause/effect relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:33 PM
3

Going somewhere to hunt for "easy" women? Sure yeah that's creepy. I was mainly thinking about the women I've dated who were immigrants. I send likes to all sorts of different women on dating apps, and just happen to get more matches from nonwestern women. It's not like I'm aiming to take advantage of them, it's just the type of people who like me back. Should I just ignore immigrant women I come across who seem smart or funny? Anyway, since most women everywhere think men treat them like shit, …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:31 PM
–

So, I have several female friends, but I don't really think it makes a difference dating. Going to them for dating advice is rarely useful precisely because their perspective is so different. Women are generally used to prospective partners falling into their lap, so a lot of their advice is just completely useless to me. Now, that said, I don't pick friends based on how useful they are, so I'm very happy with my female friends and the terrible advice they sometimes give me. I'm sure they also f…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:17 PM
-1

I think you're being a little mean to the poor guy here. He's bad at explaining it, but I think he is talking about something real. You're looking at it assuming OP is a bad person taking of foreign women, but in my experience it's more that many nonwestern women are used to being treated like shit, and when a man treats them right, they praise him as exceptional. At the same time, it's not uncommon for (some) western women to complain that 95% of men are terrible, while continuing to date those…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:06 PM
2

Totally agree. And I've never been called creepy, because I have the social skills to know better than to compliment random strangers in public.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:43 PM
–

First, it's of young men who had sex within the last two years, so there's a large group of men(those who haven't) who would be left out here and it is possible a much smaller percent of those men would use these tactics if given the chance. Kinda demoralizing when you think about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:34 PM
1

Nope. Not falling for it. You can't gaslight me into acting creepy and complimenting random women in public.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:26 PM
4

31% of Gen Z women are gay. 12% of Gen Z men are gay. (This does not hold for older cohorts) That leaves a pretty sizeable chunk of men who are just out of luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:03 PM
1

you’ll have to find someone who appreciates you for who you are as a person. This is no more realistic than saying "Go out there and find yourself a manic pixie dream girl!" Like, I'm sure a minority of women genuinely are attracted to men as people, but I'm competing with every other guy for their affections. In terms of advice it's just so much more realistic to shoot for the center of mass and go after shallow materialistic women, especially when it comes to online dating, where showing your …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 01:09 AM
2

No, it's more that gendered problems like the draft are pretty much explicitly a deal men make with society in exchange for women's affection. For example, nearly every man who has ever been drafted has gone to war thinking of his wife back home. If we're gonna engage in a discussion about why men should accept romantically empty lives, then the whole bargain is up for renegotiation, starting with all the things you listed.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 09:10 PM
7

You know what? I don't actually care, as long as I get to live a happy romantically fulfilled life. There are a whole bunch of things I'll endure or give up if the deal is that I get to be happy the rest of the time. So OF COURSE I'm gonna start complaining abou the draft when the topic is an attempt to justify why I should accept living without those things that make the trade offs worthwhile.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 06:43 PM
3

Hinge seems to work more or less okay for now. All these apps are cannibalizing their userbase at this point so I wouldn't hold my breath for something better to come along.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 04:44 PM
0

I think women are often unwilling to punish men in the moment for behavior they find objectionable. If some dude is being pushy about getting a girl's number, some (but not all) of the time she's just gonna decide it's easier to give it to him, and he'll go forward knowing that sometimes women reward being pushy. If women were more diligent about punishing behavior they consider misogynistic or at least not rewarding it, the problem would be solved very quickly.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 04:12 PM
-1

Okay so yes, obviously ingroup bias and the "women are wonderful" thing plays a significant role in motivating misogyny. And I would even go so far as to say that misogyny is women's problem to solve (as a man, all I can really do is not be misogynistic myself) but I think saying this ingroup bias is the PRIMARY factor causing misogyny is kinda a reach. I think the real primary factor causing misogyny is the simple fact that men care about women a whole lot more than women care about men, and th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 04:04 PM
–

Dating a someone too attractive can be kinda scary. My first girlfriend was very attractive, and for a long chunk of our relationship I was super stressed out about her breaking up with me. "Downgrading" is an easy way to feel more emotionally secure, is my guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 02:39 AM
1

Frankly, seeing people in terms of "value" like they're stock options is disgusting. Any man would be (rightfully) criticized for using that sort of language about women.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 01:09 AM
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