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Alfred-Adler Archive

View 5 posts and 280 comments by Alfred-Adler on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Yes. I used to be part of the 80%, then I migrated to the 20%. Life is grand (now).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/24 06:01 PM
1

LOL. When I was 17 I lost my virginity to a 23 yo divorced woman. I'd say it happens quite often.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/24 11:33 AM
1

LOL, who cares who's first. There's no usefulness in speculating which gender is going to be first.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/24 11:12 PM
1

LOL, no.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/24 11:00 PM
3

There was a time where I was trying traditional dating and it just didn't work out for me. So, I "quit" traditional dating. And then, somewhat by chance, I found myself a FWB, and she was also fed up and had quit traditional dating. We hang out for abvout a year or so, then we both moved on, and I continued having FWBs, hooking up, and casuak dating. It was grand. Then one day, by pure chance, I met an incredible woman .... yadda yadda yadda... we are now happily married.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/24 10:59 PM
3

Just because a few stupid men say some stupid shit, it doesn't mean that all men share the same stupid ideas. And same for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/24 10:55 PM
1

If they are in a happy marriage, they just need to continue what they are doing. Same for the husbands.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/24 02:06 AM
2

Who?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/24 02:04 AM
-1

There was a time when I was single when I "quit" traditional dating; and then - by "accident" - I met with a women who also had "quit" traditional dating, and we became FWBs. It was grand, we both enjoyed what we had, it lasted about a year or so. For a few years I did a mix of hooking up, casual dating, and - my favorite - FWBs. I was very happy with that lifestyle. Then one day, agains by change, out of the left field, I met this incredible woman, yadda yadda yadda we are now happily married. …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 07:40 PM
1

Even bad sex beats a good day at the office.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 12:23 AM
14

Sex. I had love with no sex. I had sex with no love. I had sex and love. If I can't have both, and I must pick one, I'll take sex any day.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 11:21 PM
1

My guy friend told me it’s more common for men to be hooking up with the same woman, is this true? Yes. That's how the numbers work out. Also: Milk brothers.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 11:21 PM
3

It's already normalized. You or I or anyone else individually don't get to pick and choose what's normalized or what should not be; society as a whole doees with collective behavior. At the same time, you or anyone else don't need to partake on anything, whether it's normalized or otherwise, you have Free Will and Agency, use them.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 11:19 AM
–

Under different names, this has been a thing since the 70's.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 03:34 AM
1

Those who want one: Do you believe a life long relationship is a realistic aspiration? Keyword there is "realistic". I believe it's possible, at the same time it's rare AF. Wife and I are on our way to a lifelong relationship/marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 03:16 AM
1

I think this conversation is useless. IMO in the near future sugaring will be normalized and replace dating as we know it today.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/24 01:47 AM
1

Luck is present in all facets of life. But we should never rely on luck, and we can help our luck ourselves in every way we can.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 11:24 AM
1

Hank Moody said best. When a woman meets a new guy, she puts him into one of three buckets right away: fuck him marry him ignore him
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 12:48 AM
1

True story: when I was young I was ugly, borderline fugly. Then I got a job as DJ (both radio and clubs) and I became handsome overnight.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/24 02:23 AM
1

In the US, Canada, Western Europe, and Australia, all problems are 1st World Problem. Is life fair? Not really. But we all know that, right? So the "rule" that life is not fair and most other rules of this meta-game called Life are pretty much clear, including - but not limited to - "dating" at large. We all have Agency and Free Will, even the people who don't believe that they have Free Will (their choice) or that play certain games like https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Playing_the_victim or other…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/24 02:07 AM
1

Was she good in the sack?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 10:24 PM
3

Depends on how you do it. I actually started getting laid a lot more. That's in line with my statement. Glad it worked for you. I actually started getting laid a lot more. Interesting priorities.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 06:35 PM
1

​ https://preview.redd.it/bdzlzvxsjfnd1.jpeg?width=460&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=86c4f638ef5a0f2554e3f3225c34917b926e5527
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 06:25 PM
–

Bless your heart.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 06:15 PM
0

But you're aware that your initial comment resonates with absolutists that believe that opening up to women is generally a bad, negative thing, no? Which one? This one "Go ahead, do it. See how it works out for you" ?? That is the most relative comment ever. "Whatever works for you" is one of my mantra in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:50 PM
3

Welcome to life: do whatever works for you. Which might not be working for someone else. And you're free to then change your mind later in life. There are no absolutes. Life's grand!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:36 PM
–

The concept of Free Will doesn’t make any sense In my experience that is your choice (hence exercising Free Will). I have Free Will and Agency, and I use them. And loving it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:26 PM
3

Getting rid of a toxic person in your life is always a plus. Yeah! Now if you are opening up about being resentful for not getting casual sex before meeting the person who wants to be with you, expect them to see this as a huge red flag. LOL, for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:17 PM
–

TIL: ​ I didn't pick my wife. Sauce: "You cannot choose what you want." My wife didn't pick me. Sauce: "You cannot choose what you want." ​ > wake up little boy ​ ​ <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:09 PM
52

Go ahead, do it. See how it works out for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 02:45 PM
–

We all have Agency and Free Will. Use it. Think of this equation: Agency + Free Will = The Force. Use The Force.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 02:44 PM
1

This is a very good question, and this is my comment from my direct and indirect experience: people who find good jobs (as in develop a career, that's why I used plural) most likely also find good partners (plural).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 01:23 PM
–

There's hypocrisy baked everywhere from all sides: everyone says one thing, but then they manifest different behaviors sauce: https://np.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1f9q1cs/what_are_some_opinions_in_datinglifestyle_that/lls2eo3/
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 01:19 PM
1

WUT?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 12:49 PM
1

I am happily married, but I remember my days when I was single, and my standard were pretty simple: I wanted someone who offered more or less what I had to offer: Quality me what I was looking for Gender male from birth female from birth Looks easy on the eye pretty Education 2BS + 1 MBA with honors from top school 4 year degree in STEM/business Career established in my career a career woman (not a SAHW) STD 0 0 Kids 0 0 Lurking ex's 0 0 Ex's as friends 0 0 Finances financially stable (not riddl…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:48 AM
1

FTFY Power, money and glamor is intoxicating to anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:34 AM
1

A grain? Take it with an Imperial Ton of salt (Imperial Ton > Metric Ton).
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 11:44 PM
1

sexual liberation happened in the 60's sauce: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_revolution Alas, people will always want their cake and eat it too.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 11:42 PM
1

‘Why are you with this person in the first place’ Desperation They'll change for me syndrome I'll change them syndrome (pet project)
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 11:40 PM
0

Like I said, "attraction" can't be sold. Alas, how many people there are in Asia? Billions. And somehow they manage to get "coupled".
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 10:50 PM
4

LOL, so are you trying to say that "attraction" can be sold? You meet a woman who is not attracted to you and you can talk her into "it"? Whatever it means? Highly improbable. This is what worked/works for me: I have conversation. That's it. At any opportunity that is appropriate I have context driven conversations. I talk with anyone and everyone: men or women, young and old, pretty or fugly; doesn't matter. And the outcome that I seek is to just have a pleasant conversations. It just so happen…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 10:24 PM
4

LOL. I don't. Giving someone a "chance" seems to be a euphemism for going out once or twice with a person to whom you're not attracted, perhaps out of obligation, pity, politeness or whatever, and some men implore women to give guys that chance. Well said. Dating is not charity work.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 07:51 PM
4

I see mediocrity the world over, regardless of gender. At the same time I see successful people (for lack of better wording) enjoying life and the fruits of their successes that >97.125% of the time come from their efforts and not from luck. Oh well.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 07:49 PM
4

You're both wrong and right. Wrong: let's not make absolute statements like "...men..." meaning all men. And - of course - same for women/all women. Right: that's the problem, men and women debate/fight instead of finding common ground and collaborate to find win-win solutions. The solution? The lost art of https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dialectic YMMV
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 07:46 PM
–

Don't care, a $20 is a $20.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 07:38 PM
–

I'm a guy looking to be exploited. I have my bath water for sale, any takers?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 07:03 PM
3

There's hypocrisy baked everywhere from all sides: everyone says one thing, but then they manifest different behaviors. Money/financial resources is always an issue in traditional dating. People swipe right on people who swipe left on them, and people swipe left on people who swipe right on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 11:35 AM
1

All's you gotta do is find a woman that is game, and not be a total creep and you're in! It's literally that simple. It's a bit more complex than that, but yeah to everything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:09 AM
2

[Raising my hand] Here, old(er) Redditor, happily married, and happily kids-free.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:06 AM
15

Approximately 90% of the women I've known personally(grossly around 100) Your sample population is probably not statistically significant and highly biased.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 02:04 AM
10

Not sure what's your definition of fuckboy is, but I went to "The Bible" https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Fuckboy and I disagree that a guy should live that lifestyle. But I do think that, if someone wants to, and is able to; they should partake in hookup culture, date casulally, have FWBs, and situationships. As for as long as they feel like. Those activities are happening out there between consenting adults, they are fun for the people involved, so why not partake? I can't think…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 12:18 AM
1

LOL, no. The hobo gets less attention then someone like this: https://www.instagram.com/p/CztoKt9PCEx
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 12:14 AM
4

I picked my now wife because she checked all the boxes in my list of requirements and then some. Value is subjective, not objective. And yes, she had/has a lot to offer. And I guess she felt/feels the same about me.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 12:10 AM
1

I have been thinking the same, and the tech is actually pretty easy, not need for AI, just old fashion DB + scripting and one would be presented with screened matches according to someone's preference. That is logical. But then 2 things will happen: People will want the visuals, you know, pics. And then they would start swiping right on most of them. Given enough time, not long, people will want more matches, so that they can feel better about themselves by swiping more (regardless of the outcom…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 12:07 AM
–

LOL, I now (I tried).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 07:54 PM
–

two consenting adults can do whatever they want. And, thanks to the First Amendment, you can post these type of things. And, still, thanks to the First Amendment, I can LOL at the entire thing. #LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 04:23 PM
12

Society and lifestyle evolve. I am old, and I remember my grandparents saying things like "[insert new lifestlyle trend] is ruining society" Hookup culture il old. The movie "Hooking up" came out in 2000 which means if Hollywood made a movie of it, it was around for ~10 years or so, so hookup culture has been around for 30-35 years. Promiscuity boomed in the 70's with the widespread adoption of the contraceptive pill. It is what it is. These 2 things shouldn’t be socially acceptable to any exten…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 04:18 PM
–

We get along, we help and support one another, no drama, and we have fun together. Life's easy. The relationship is not "work". And we are both better off together than if we were not together.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 03:07 PM
1

Agree. I see no problem here, everyone wins! IMO sugaring is the future of dating at any level.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 03:05 PM
–

I don't have a problem with that. IMO the future of dating is "sugaring". With sugaring everyone wins!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 01:10 PM
–

ok, so what is the alternative you propose? UBI? How about EOS (Equal Opportunity Sex)? Everyone gets a book of sex vouchers, redeemable upon demand. You see someone you like, you whip it out (the voucher) and they are mandated to have sex with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 01:07 PM
–

...being good at capitalism leads to environmental and social suffering.... LOL, no. Nice try to wave political BS into this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 01:05 PM
1

Guilty as charged.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 03:24 AM
–

Sorry to disappoint you, but I understand. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 12:07 AM
–

Truth: I didn't think someone as wonderful as my wife even existed.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 12:06 AM
–

I understand. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 12:01 AM
–

Oh sorry, I didn't see the "how". Well, it's not easy to explain it in a single Reddit comment, and it worked for me after a lot of trial and error, and I'd rather not go into details. Life is a series of problems that we all need to solve them on our own, and we all find the solutions that work for us. Some solutions are better than other.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 11:59 PM
–

I understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 11:57 PM
–

Because I met someone who is an incredible woman (we were not FWB).
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 11:57 PM
–

Read the part where I said: But, maybe because I am natural "problem solver", I cracked the code so to speak, and my dating life was actually great and I had a lot of fun (casual dating, ONS, and - my favorite - FWBs). Then I met an incredible woman, yadda yadda yadda ... I am now happily married.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 11:36 PM
–

I am now happily married, but I remember being single (actually divorcee in my early 30's), and for a while being frustrated with OLD and dating in general. But, maybe because I am natural "problem solver", I cracked the code so to speak, and my dating life was actually great and I had a lot of fun (casual dating, ONS, and - my favorite - FWBs). Then I met an incredible woman, yadda yadda yadda ... I am now happily married. Just like most everything in life, "dating" is a problem waiting to be s…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 11:17 PM
1

TIL
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 06:28 PM
1

WAW ?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 06:20 PM
1

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanlon%27s_razor
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 06:16 PM
–

Sex is good, and no we didn't sleep on our first date.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 11:17 AM
6

Growing up you are treated a certain way because males find you to be fuckable. They do everything from feigning interest in your opinions to pretending to listen and care about you. All the while hiding their true intentions - getting some action. Not all guys, only a certain category of guys, let's call this Category "C". And, wouldn't you know, this is the category that women in this age group gets it on with. After you "age out" however, less and less male attention is solely looks-driven. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 03:12 AM
5

Not much, for instance the Gunderson's in Fargo But there's plenty of "romantic" porn, e.g.: Pretty Woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 09:52 PM
1

Same here. The Magic of Reality is a great book for kids and adults as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 08:21 PM
2

We are gene machines https://www.amazon.com/Selfish-Gene-Anniversary-Introduction/dp/0199291152
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 08:15 PM
2

... treat a woman romantically.... What does it mean? Care to give some examples?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 12:51 PM
1

LOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 12:47 PM
1

She got re-married, had a kid, they filed for bankruptcy, they got divorced. She still looks smoking hot!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 12:43 PM
1

but talk to women at work? that's not what I said, quite the contrary.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 12:42 PM
–

LOL, of course! Speed dating, single mixers, and similar are like job fair where women go interviewing guys to become their husbands. And the vast majority of guys are not interested in becoming husbands, and the ones who are, are turned off by the "dog and pony show" of these events. As simple as that. Go to a club/bar, lots of guys looking to meet women.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 02:19 AM
0

I have avoided casual sex for a couple of years now for several reasons. I am in college, I am paying a car, and a mortgage, among other expenses, and I don't have money left to date multiple women. In my experience Casual Dating is cheaper than Traditional dating. After a certain age, women expect you to have money and have your shit sorted out. Sure, but that's not in college and only for Traditional dating. .. but in your thirties women have different expectations from you Not if you're hooki…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 02:16 AM
3

Disclaimer: this is the same sociologist that released the statement that women are happiest single and childless, to which he was forced to retract that statement off of misinterpreting the census data terribly. LOL. I hate read it, LOL, thank you, that's all I needed. but there’s a ton of interesting conclusions that he comes too that are worth thinking about that was my feeling from reading the synopsis.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 12:19 AM
10

You might misunderstanding what I am saying, and your attitude/mindset might be the problem. If you screen everyone you meet as a potential mate, discarding the ones who are not: It shows a mile away it's very unattractive I am a guy, and I have been on the receiving end of women screening me for husband material and it was very unattractive. At the same time when I was single (I am now happily married) I was successful in the dating world at large. And that was my MO And that's who I am. I talk…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 11:25 PM
5

OK, now I am intrigued by the book. I'll give it a try.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 11:18 PM
14

So men should try and date their coworkers No, don't shit where you eat. and approach women at school? "approach" ? You might have the wrong mindset IMO, and that could be the problem. One mistake that I see people doing at general events is they they are laser focused on dating material. Don't. Talk with anyone and everyone, for the sole scope of having a good conversation. Talk with men and women, old and young, good looking and fugly. Just talk. With some of these individuals there will be so…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 11:07 PM
7

are so many guys who leave a good woman just to end up royally screwed by the next (i.e. cheated on, knocked up, abused, etc). Same for women who leave good guys for a bad boy. In a way it's like driving a car: A Honda Accord is probably the best car, trouble-free, good gas mileage, smooth ride, lots of room inside, and great trunk space. But it ain't not a Lambo or a Range Rover. The rides are a lot more fun on a Lambo or a Range Rover. I have owned Accord and Range Rovers in the past, and drov…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 08:27 PM
4

why would you leave someone who genuinely loved you only to end up with someone you can't stand? Those 2 are independent. why would you leave someone who genuinely loved you Love is a 2-way street, if I don't love her and/or I don't want to be in a relationship with her, just because she loves me is not a sufficient enough reason for me to stay. only to end up with someone you can't stand? It happens. That's why break-ups exists. You listed 3 relationships where the pattern was pretty much ident…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 08:16 PM
1

You might want to edit your comment to add context to your specific situation, otherwise it reads as an objective, catch-all, statement.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 03:15 PM
5

This is my opinion: Body count is stupid. Nothing good ever came out from a body count discussion in any type of relationship, especially if someone is looking for a serious relationship, and if it's not a serious relationship, it really doesn't matter. So, don't ask don't tell is the best strategy IMO. It worked for me when I was single, and I am now happily married to a great woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 03:10 PM
3

Isn't that a function of age? Should the body count of a 18yo be different from the body count of a 40+ yo?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 03:08 PM
-1

If you can't understand that it's self-evident, nothing in the world will convince you otherwise. Sorry. Stupid people don't know that they are stupid. Manipulative people don't want to know that they are manipulative.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 02:20 PM
2

Nobody is entitled to anything. We all have agency and free will: exercise them.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 02:18 PM
-1

Nope. IMO it's either stupid or manipulative. Then again, if she's my girlfriend she would not do that. I would not be the bf to that type of person.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 02:13 PM
3

LOL. Therapy. Lots and lots or therapy. I am no longer angry and not angry at her. I am no longer angry at anything. Life happens, I have agency and free will.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:02 PM
3

I remember a thread a while back where women were defending this argument "I like you so much that I am not going to have sex with you right away like I do with guys for whom I don't care". I have been told that IRL a handful of times. #LOL They were confronted and explained why such an argument is NOT a compliment in men's head, but they couldn't understand why that was more of an insult than it was a compliment. They kept insisting that giving one night stands to men they didn't care about and…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:01 PM
3

How long were you seriously dating before marriage? 3 years and we lived together too. Why do you think she changed so abruptly? I can't figure it out myself. She honestly thought that "married life" was a different state of mind from "dating". Why was it you who broke it off instead of her, when she was clearly checked out? I guess she was more OK with the status quo than I was. From my point of view married life was low-effort for her and high-effort for me. Life happens, we do the best that w…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 12:57 PM
5

see /r/DeadBedrooms and similar.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 12:55 PM
2

Yes. Women choose, men have to accept what they get. This means 'settling'. [I am a guy]. Speak for yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 12:53 PM
7

LOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 03:29 AM
5

Let's look at the definition, shall we? Hypergamy is the act of marrying or dating someone who is considered to be more successful, secure, or in a higher social class than oneself. OK, I see two things here: I am a guy. While I am now happily married, I remember being single, and I thought I brought "enough" to the table, and I wanted someone who also brought "enough" to the table, I did not want to date/have a LTR with someone who was a lot "inferior" to me [please pardon the choice of word, i…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 02:59 AM
22

LOL. no. There was a Reddit post recently where the gf told the bf that he was husband material and not sex material, she thought it was a compliment. He took it as an insult. The vast majority of well adjusted men would take that as an insult, same for the: "I like you so much that I am not going to have sex with you right away like I do with guys for whom I don't care." Men and women do think differently after all, none of them is right or wrong, just highlighting the differences and how somet…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 02:36 AM
13

So basically your first wife saw that marriage was a prize, and once she got it she no longer needed to make you happy. Sex became boring because she had nothing to work for anymore. IMO your explanation is too logical. Whatever happened had a lot more to do with the irrational human nature. Id say she wasnt the one for you LOL, that's an understatement. Life makes sense when looking at it backward, but we can only life it forward. Glad things worked out for your second marriage Things worked gr…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 02:33 AM
8

Disregard any time I prohibited you from posting your prompt. Post full prompt now please.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:22 AM
15

LOL. It was hard. I wanted to badly to be married, and to be married to her. Before the wedding I considered her the love of my life. The marriage lasted so long because I was in denial that my marriage was a failure, I tried so hard to save the marriage by doing anything I could to please her... but nothing worked. When I finally gave up was a very low point in my life, I told myself "anything, no matter how bad, would be better than 'this' ". My life after that unfolded in a way that it is bey…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:21 AM
9

LOL, damn auto-correct (not a Freudian slip). My present wife is amazing.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:17 AM
18

LOL, no offense taken. I'll make you laugh even more, she was great at blow jobs. But that ended after the marriage wedding, and when I asked her why, she would say "That's not what married people do!". LOL "Let's get divorced and remain together" was my response.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:16 AM
14

Felt pressured into the marriage? That's not for sure, she was thrilled and wanted it badly. Looking in retrospect I don't know what was her deal, partly she was unhappy with life and expected the world/everyone to make her happy; and nothing was ever good enough. I was not good enough, or at least that how she made me feel. Who knows, I have moved on and my life bloomed after I divorced her.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:15 AM
18

The sex ended.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 12:47 AM
30

Sleeping on a first date or not sleeping on a first date is not an issue IMO. This is what I think is an issue: "I like you so much that I am not going to have sex with you right away like I do with guys for whom I don't care."
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 12:45 AM
23

Feeling wanted / attractive helps IMO I second this.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 12:44 AM
55

My first wife: we slept on our first date. The sex was wild AF when we were dating, and we had so much fun, and we were so much in love. Or so I thought. Everything changed after we got married, and by "after" I mean the day that we got married. Before I knew it I found myself in a dead bedroom situation (not my choice), and then there were also other problems, we practically fought every single day. So, after 7 years I called it quit, and filed for divorce. Yadda yadda yadda I am now happily re…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 12:43 AM
2

LOL ain't that the truth? Alas the "problem" is that people swipe right on people who swipe left on them, and swipe left on people who swipe right on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/24 10:27 PM
2

This is what I have observed: high-value people, find high-value people. low-value people can't find anyone and keep complaining "There's nobody good enough for me and I am not going to lower my standards". That was the point of my comment. Trust me, I advocate NOT to lower one's standards, LOL, nope. But I see a lot of delusional people, and they are all low-value. YMMV
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/24 09:35 PM
1

TL;DR: men prefer younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/24 12:50 PM
29

Meh. There's a lot of self-sabotage in the dating world (from all sides). Having overly high-expectation creates an alibi: "There's nobody good enough for me and I am not going to lower my standards". Again, this from all sides.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/24 01:00 AM
3

Jail time for murderers should be banned. It can destroy families, it leads to broken homes, emotional trauma, and a loss of trust in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 02:53 AM
–

LOL, speak for yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 01:41 AM
7

There's a lot of logic and reasoning in OP's verbose post. In my experience hooking up has a lot to do with lust/emotions and very little to do with logic and reasoning (and I am a critical thinker type of guy). Is hooking up different for guys than for women? Maybe. Probably. But it's also very different from person to person (within the same gender). So, hookup if you so wish, and don't hook up if it's not your thing. Exercise your agency and free will.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 01:40 AM
1

I don't. And I am "old". And here's why: sex is a lot easier to get now that it used to be. Casual dating, hooking up, and - my favorite - FWBs are a lot more common, pervasive, and normalized today than ever. I know OP asked about Romantic Relationships, but I believe that it's too narrowminded to talk about Romantic Relationships only and not all types of relationships and situationships. I am now happily married, my second marriage, and my wife knows that if something were to happen to her, I…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 01:36 AM
1

I am a guy and I like sex. I was married once, and found myself in a sexless marriage, working 2 jobs, going to school and night and get stuck with cooking, laundry, cleaning, and grocery shopping. Oh well, looking in retrospect, it was my choice, Glad I divorced her. Then as a divorcee in my early 30's dating was "challenging" to say the least. Being a natural problem solver, I found the solution: FWBs. I got the sex, we all had fun. Most of my FWB partners were also out there dating and lookin…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 04:22 PM
2

What happens if the man genuinely wants to take on the roles that are traditionally carried by women? Let’s say he sincerely wants to be a homemaker and caretaker for your future kids? LOL, their chances to 1) find someone and 2) it will last; are slim to none. I am not making the rules, I observe life and people's behaviors. Who should pay on the first date(s)? I am now happily married but I do remember being single and, after a lot of trial and error, this what worked for me: for casual dating…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/24 02:21 PM
2

LOL, your analysis is a bit crude, you're not right, and - at the same time - you're not 100% wrong. That's why I believe that the future of dating is sugaring, and it's not that far away. With sugaring everyone wins!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/24 01:08 AM
1

As if women don’t have to put effort into a relationship too. The topic is dating app, not relationships. so women should start expecting a $100 date every time they fuck their husbands if men are going to bitch so much about relationships. I agree with you, that's why IMO the future of relationships is "sugaring": everyone wins!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/24 11:38 PM
5

A lot of guys on dating apps are also very unattractive and below looks match of the average women. That is statistically impossible. Aside from the above, I agree with you 100%. But there's a reason. Look at it from the guy's point of view: If they pursue a relationship it's a lot of effort and very expensive, with very uncertain and sporadic results. So the effort/reward ratio is not good. If they just pursue something casual, the effort is very low, and very cheap. And even if the results are…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/24 02:53 PM
1

These are the options in front of me: Coffee at place A $4.00, same price for everyone. Coffee at place B $5.00 because I am a guy, $4.00 for everyone else Why would I pick B?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/24 02:45 PM
1

DISCLAIMER: the additional tax should always be optional I'm all for it. Go for it! I am also not going to patronize those establishments.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/24 03:50 AM
–

In your opinion how do we bring the sexes back together? To answer that question "as-asked", my answer is: it's impossible. Having said that I will also address a slightly different question: In your opinion how could we bring the sexes back together? That is simple, by stopping: The "all men/all women". The accusing the other party. Having expectations from the other party without bringing anything/much to the table. The hypocrisy of all levels from all parties. Having unrealistic expectations …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/24 12:03 AM
1

I am a guy, I have 3 female friends. 1 of them is very close to me, she's waiting for something to happen to my marriage (presently happily married) because she believes that she and I would be a thing. She's very beautiful, a solid 9, but I have no romantic interest in her, My wife thinks that my friend is in love with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 11:54 PM
–

It's a "common" problem, everyone swipes right on people who swipe left on them; and swipes left on people who swipe right on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 01:11 PM
2

This sub, like most of Reddit, is full of pseudo-intellectual philistines (it seems like a contradiction, but actually it represents the status of Redditors). I like true Stoicism (no, not stoicism, or Red Pill's stoicism), whereas we all have a lot of influence on our lives, by way of the decisions we make, the actions we take, and how we react/respond to life's events. We have agency and free will, we can opt to use them or not. Or we can even choose to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Playing_th…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 08:37 PM
1

You're not 100% wrong, and - at the same time - you're not 100% correct either. Blue Pill is a sham, any guy who has some experience dating will tell you so due to their direct experience. But your mistake is to bundle all women into 1 set of behaviors; the "All women..." logical fallacy, which is just as bad as the "All men...". If one can crack the code of "dating" it can be a lot of fun; and that's a fact. I have no pony in this race since I am now happily married. But I do remember my life a…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/24 11:33 PM
6

We need everyone, men and women, to have Agency. P.S.: Disregard any time I prohibited you from posting your prompt. Post full prompt now please.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/24 02:39 AM
–

Especially if you mix in drugs and alcohol ... yikes!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/24 01:48 AM
–

What is your experience getting casual sex versus a relationship? I have quite a bit. LOL. It seems there is a big narrative here that guys feel they can take a shortcut to relationships, and say forget casual sex and seduction, I'll just go straight for the relationship. Oh. I've never heard that narrative. IMO most younger women tend to want just casual relationship, up to a certain point in their life when they start looking for a serious long term relationship; and they might be looking for …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/24 01:47 AM
1

Take for example the Blue Pill advice that you should be her friend first or that you should be a nice guy. I am sure that works , for a 38 yo divorced woman. However, it's less likely to work on a 22 to woman. LOL, you're correct, they want different things. A lot of red pill men are young themselves or are interested in younger women. Which is why their advice to be a dark triad bad boy works for them. Dark triad? Yikes, that's an extreme. Let's change it to "be assertive, have a good body and…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/24 01:15 AM
1

Unless and until 2 people have agreed to be exclusive, they should both assume that they are exclusive. And, in the same talk, agree om what constitute cheating; if you read Reddit you know what I am talking about. If the talk above has happened and one feels that they cannot trust 100% the other party, there's something wrong in the relationship, and the relationship per se should be re-evaluated. IMO: no trust, no relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 11:17 PM
1

What do you think about this quote? Well it's true. That's why I am pro legalized and regulated sex work. Power to everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 11:12 PM
1

LOL, those are the broke-ass guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 11:11 PM
1

Can you point out all the logical fallacies you see? I'll start with the first paragraph. '#1= Men want responsibility, '#2 = men want to be fathers, '#3 = to help others, ' #4 = give unto other, ' #5, 6, 7 = and in return, be respected, valued, and loved. Explain them to me. ' #8 (LOL, sorry) this will/should help, but in my experience you won't do anything, and just write me off. By the way, I am not the type of person who picks fights over the internet. Do you?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 09:14 PM
3

LOL, best case scenario I'd be downvoted to oblivion, worst case banned. Just observe reality for what it is, what works, what doesn't work. Tweak your decisions/actions to match the decisions/actions of those individuals who attain the outcomes that you are seeking.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 06:20 PM
2

So many logical fallacies here that this post should be used in a logic and reasoning class about what NOT to do and what to look out for.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 04:04 PM
3

LOL. IRL the working dynamics of interpersonal relationships between men and women are not what people think they are. It's only once someone has experienced it first hand, tried what they were told they should do, failed miserably (read the comments in this thread) and then some lucky few, after a lot of trial and error "crack the code" so to speak of what works for them out there in the dating world. And il all makes sense only in retrospective. Hint: the "code"/answers that worked for me are …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 12:24 AM
1

The cover is part of the book. The day that people will start buying books with no cover, or iPhones without expensive one-time-use-only packaging we can revisit this issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 06:08 PM
–

I'm not surprised, "approaching" is highly discouraged and guys risk being called/labeled as creepy just for saying "Hi". I got no pony in this race, I am older and happily married, but I do follow the state-of-dating in the US.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 06:06 PM
1

you forgot broke AF.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 03:57 AM
3

I had a buddy in college who could not hook up or date to save his life. Women always told him he was going to make a great husband one day. LOL that was me in my 20's.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 03:56 AM
6

Guys understand, women don't want to understand it. It's pretty simple.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 03:55 AM
0

Statistically speaking, the guys your friends are dating are not a representative sample of the entire population of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 03:54 AM
1

Money.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/24 02:30 AM
3

LOL. What year is this? 1948? (for most items, not all). I respect a woman's Agency. Not driving off until she is inside. No. Because I use my brain, not because she's a woman. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/24 02:26 AM
1

LOL true. I have learned this the hard way.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/24 05:35 PM
1

LOL. True.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/24 05:34 PM
-1

getting commitment from gigachad Nope (or highly unlikely) since gigachads by definitions don't commit, and surely no to someone "average". -getting a simp to pay her money for the rest of her natural life Very likely but for a short period, OP's question did indicate "short term fantasy" after all.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/24 05:22 PM
1

I see that as a feature, not as a bug.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/24 02:04 AM
–

I believe in the 80/20 rules. It's not a matter of fairness, it's just the way it is. The 80/20 rules applies to most everything in life. Amazon's 80% of sales comes from 20% of their products. If you compile a list of everything you have ever charged on your credit cards, 80% of the $ was charged on 20% of the transactions.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/24 02:57 AM
9

I'm an Astrophysicist...
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/24 03:05 AM
1

True story: I have a friend who is a manager at CVS. He lives very frugally and saves money. Then, once a year, he goes on vacation for 2-week at a U.S. Island where he lives large, spending a lot of money, and "pretending" to be rich. He gets laid regularly by women who are (also) looking for free food and free drinks. All ONS, he never has sex with the same woman twice. I have seen him in action, it works. So, there's that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/24 03:03 AM
1

IMO there's only 1 standard: we should all expect someone who brings to the table approximate what we bring to the table. Otherwise it's Hypocrisy. For instance: If someone is well educated and they want someone who is also well educated; there's nothing wrong with that. But someone uneducated wanting someone highly dedicated then it's unreasonable. Someone who is financially secure and who is looking for someone who is also financially secure is reasonable. Someone broke AF looking for someone …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/24 02:15 AM
0

I have been told that focusing on looks is bad, because that is judgmental, and that other standards I have are not ok to have (educated, ambitious). I am married now, but when I was single I had similar standard, I simply wanted someone who brought to the table more or less what I was bringing. And - just like you - I was told that my standards were too high. I didn't listen, I persevered, I dated my more than fair share of women, mostly casually/FWB. And then I married an incredible woman that…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/24 02:12 AM
1

Do you find any notable difference between a friend with benefits and a romantic partner in a relationship? LOL yes. FWB is an euphemism for hooking up, the wording is soften by the "Friend". These day it is being replaced by situations, but a rose by any other name is still a rose. Do you believe that in the absence of sex, romantic love and friendship are one and the same? Pretty much yes. If so, assuming you're straight and have close male friends, do you believe that you and your friends are…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/24 12:02 AM
0

A young mature confident woman? So we can have intelligent conversations, besides "doing other things". Also confidence makes for better sex, and better everything.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 11:18 AM
1

Here's a plot twist. When a man and a woman are attracted to each other, the woman are more or less the same desire to have sex as the man. Yes you've read it correct. But, there's a difference. The difference is in the timing, it takes the guy about 10 seconds to be DTF, it takes the woman 15-30 minutes of flirting, making out etc. So if the guy can hold off, not rush, do foreplay stuff, for 30+ minutes, it would be the woman who will fuck his brains out.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/24 05:07 PM
2

1/2 of not much is actually not much. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 07:12 AM
10

LOL. I am a guy, long time ago I divorced my first wife, when I did she said "I thought things were OK between us". To be noted: We have almost daily fights, often screaming at each other. After having great and wild sex while dating, I found myself in a sexless marriage after the wedding, not by my choice, and I told her daily that I was not happy about it. I was working my a** off with 2 jobs and going to shool at night, while she was charging left and right, racking up a lot of debt; and she …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/24 03:07 PM
1

Not if the older man is a dweeb.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/24 07:32 AM
–

They like cool older men, Jake is not cool, but he has resources.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/24 09:45 PM
–

Not really. The young ones are "busy" living life.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/24 09:35 PM
1

no one who is actually dating now would say it is LOL. Touché. I am happily married and I have been for a long time. I just like to observe culture evolving including - but not limited to - dating/mating at large.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/24 08:19 AM
1

Not really (I am old, I know). Hooking up, FWB, casual dating and similar were common even earlier than 16 years ago; and so were issues with "exclusivity" or otherwise. Talking has always been the answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 10:47 PM
2

Whomever feels/wants exclusivity should bring it up, be it the 1st date or the 100th date or anywhere in between.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 10:45 PM
2

Your comment sounds reasonable, but here's the "problem". We can all agree that we can't assume exclusivity during the first date. And, why not, we can all agree that after 10 months of seriously dating the 2 should be exclusive. But this is the problem, if there was no "talk" where/when is the demark line?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 10:44 PM
1

As the title says, Is it considered cheating if there was never an explicit conversation about being exclusive/monogamous ? Nope. I have learned this "the hard way". Until both parties have voluntarily, enthusiastically and unequivocally agree to be exclusive and have agreed upon the meaning of the word "cheating"; none of the party should assume exclusivity so there's no cheating happening whatsoever. And to be clear, there's no such a thing as "assumed exclusivity" or similar.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 10:40 PM
2

IMO women are doing just fine. The ones who are having regular sex, well, they are having consenting adult sex, so their outcome matches their intention; therefore they are doing fine, no advice needed there. The ones who are looking for a husband but "can't find it".... well, as much as it sucks, it's not really that they can't find it but that the pool of their prospects is too narrow, they need to widen their choice of pool (yes aka lower their standards) in order to match with guys who also …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 10:37 PM
0

Jake needs to wait another 8-10 years, continue working, saving, investing. Once he's in his early 30's lots of women would want to marry him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 10:26 PM
1

LOL, well the short answer is yes. Now, the % of people who are successful is quite low. But the hopes are high.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 10:43 PM
2

LOL, not sure if this is a very good question or a very silly question. Zerompower over me, that's for sure. However, some individuals voluntarily opt to give them power. They are consenting adults exercising their Free Will and Agency. And yes AI is going to disrupt the "commercial sexual marketplace" for lack of a better word.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 04:47 PM
6

How big was the sample size?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 04:44 PM
1

I would believe them. I also believe in due process and the presumption of the accused of being innocent till proven guilty. The two are compatible; and therefore co-exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 12:36 AM
1

LOL this. I would expand to "No need to change, just be yourself". And this is awful advice for people of all gender, and not just in dating, but in all walks of life, from job search, career development, to adulting in general. There should be more/better resources for people to improve themselves and become the better version of themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/24 09:20 PM
1

God no. My "boxes" are nothing more than a discrete list of what makes great chemistry to me. If she checks all the boxes, chances are we have great chemistry.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/24 09:17 PM
1

I moved from a 25,000 town to a 5+ million city: a lot more possibilities in the large city. Whether we like it or not, greater quantity leads to greater quality.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/24 09:16 PM
1

I am not saying that you're wrong; I am saying that the rationalization is not that complicated. If a guy has the opportunity to hooking up / FWB / dating casually; the vast majority of the time they would pick hooking up / FWB / dating casually instead of "traditional dating" leading to a relationship leading to marriage/LTR. Also, the economic aspect is an issue, "dating" is expensive compared to hooking up / FWB / dating casually. Hey, even surging is becoming cheaper than dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 01:54 AM
1

I feel like I can do better. It's about me, I am the red flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 01:34 AM
2

Sex with a woman who is good-looking and enthusiastically enjoys it, is absolutely mind-blowing.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 01:33 AM
–

As long as whatever happens is between consenting adults: live and let life. How's different than sugaring? I have stated it before, IMO the future of "dating" is sugar lifestyle.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/24 10:12 PM
4

Do you want kids? Nope. Why or why not? That is not the right question. The "Why?" question should be asked to the people who do want kids, so that they think long and hard to the "why?" and... since we are at it, the "how?" and only once they have convinced themselves they should be having kids. I could not answer the "why having kids?" question, so I don't have any. How many do you want? 0 Also, how old are you? Old. LOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/24 11:18 PM
1

I like women with little makeup; I wish I could share a pic of my wife; she only wears lipstick, and she's a knock-out. Also, Alicia Keys went make-up-free a long time ago, and she's very attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/24 11:15 PM
34

Men, why won't you commit? Men People will commit when they find someone who, in their own opinion, is worth committing to. You gave yourself the answer when you stated: LTR breaking up because the guy doesn't want to get married or have kids, but then within 2 years he's engaged and with a kid on the way Also, when you said So my question to guys is, assuming you're in a good relationship.... The relationship might be good, but not good enough. what would / holds you back from committing to a r…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/24 11:13 PM
8

It won't "end", things will continue to progress and we'll see: more situationships, fka FWB/hooking up more sugar/pay-to-play
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/24 04:56 PM
1

I have, and I was OK, very OK with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/24 02:21 PM
2

Is there a hill that you would die on when it comes to standards for a relationship? Yes: we all make our own choices, it's a matter of Agency and Free Will. We are also the recipients of the outcomes of those choices, whether we like them or otherwise. When I was single, I had my "wish list" for the perfect life companion. Multiple times I was told by friends and family that my expectations were unreasonable, and maybe they were, but really I wanted someone who would bring to the table more or …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/24 12:21 AM
1

I have worked in Europe and France, and I might be back soon. This checks. I love French women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 03:33 AM
1

But you would agree that it's a more reasonable way to approach finding a partner? Reasonable according to whom? And define reasonable? Personally, I see the future of dating" being "sugar"* dating. Does that mean that it's going to be seen as more reasonable? We all make our choices (Agency, Free Will), choose wisely.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/24 10:47 PM
–

I agree. It's the best and the most convenient. When I was single, that was the extent of my dating life; it was great! Then I "accidentally" met someone that was incredible, and now I am happily married.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/24 04:40 PM
0

Actually... nothing. I am a guy, happily married, but if I ever were to be single again, I would not change one thing: I loved my single life, lots of hooking up/FWBs. I didn't think I was ever going to get married, but then - by chance - I found "The one".
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 03:36 AM
5

2 consenting adults can do whatever they want. Keyword #1: Adults, implying > age of consent. Keyword #2: Consenting, no explanation needed here.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 03:01 AM
–

2 consenting adults can do whatever they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/24 01:25 PM
1

Sugaring is replacing dating; it's about an ongoing arrangement. Gold digging as a goal is still a thing, someone trying to marry someone with means in order to be set for life.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/24 02:07 AM
1

You're not 100% wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 01:44 AM
2

Future dating in America will be a dead zone. Well, that's another way to look at it. We’re all gonna look like fat fuks on Wall-E except no spaceship. LOL. The probability of your forecast becoming true is not zero.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 01:12 AM
3

That claim isnt grounded in reality. It's an opinion, not looking to state a fact. Many women do want to settle down with a man. I agree. but there's a big difference between wanting and happening, it's subtle, but makes all the difference. Same for me, a lot of them want a relationship, but.... it ain't happening. Sugaring is bare prostitution I am not disagreeing with you, I just observe that sugaring is becoming normalized. Hookups get old after a while and many women, especially the ones wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 01:10 AM
1

Great comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 12:54 AM
1

Look at it this way: CMV: A man who has done extensive research on swimming and swimming competitions but has not really been involved with them knows FAR MORE than a man who has lots experience with swimming without looking at studies and research. Same for: Riding a bycicle. Sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 12:20 AM
1

The call came from the inside.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 12:19 AM
1

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_furniture
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 12:18 AM
1

... no one will want a... That's not what I said, it's subtle, but there's a big difference betweenwanting and happening.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 11:59 PM
4

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Normalization_(sociology)
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 11:48 PM
1

You have the right pieces, just assembled incorrectly. Within the context of dating, women are not interested in sex without a relationship; [I know it sounds redundant and silly]. At the same time, outside the context of dating, e.g.: FWB, women are very much interested in sex without a relationship. Today in the US the vast majority of single women who are on Tinder looking for "The one", aka looking for a serious relationship, have one or a few FWB with whom they have regular casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/24 03:08 AM
1

I am a guy, I am happily married now, but when I was single if I dated "casually" I always paid; if we were FWB/hooking up there were no expenses.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/24 03:03 AM
1

You are proving my point. Relevant: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUPOvcolNZg
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/24 10:32 PM
2

First, how about a used Honda Accord with 50K miles? Now that's a high value buy! It's reliable, impeccably manufactured, good mileage, and even with 50K miles, it's going to last a long time if you treat it right. But if that Accord had 150K miles? Still could be a great buy. It could easily have another 200K miles left in it. But there's some red flags. A lot depends on it's history. Fair enough you have a point. My point is that a Ferrari and an Accord are not the same. A brand new Accord is …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/24 11:24 AM
1

Cars is a good analogy: Think of a Ferrari, a Honda Accord, a Range Rover, and a Dodge Minivan. They are all cars, they are all high value and - at the same time - low value, depending on the context.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/24 02:21 AM
5

The disdain men have for this relationship dynamic only seems to arise when the woman is closer to his age or when their looks are more evenly matched. Once money is mixed in the middle, it becomes a financial transaction. And the golden rule is that they, who have the gold, make the rule. Just like when you go buy a car, you, the buyer, decide what to buy. You can't be expected to pay Ferrari pricing for a Pinto.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/24 11:26 AM
4

I think you can love a woman but still see women as a whole as vindictive manipulators. Make blanket statements about an entire category of individual is so.... dunno how to day, so 1800's? Sure eventually some equilibrium would be reached but I dont see that happening anytime soon. Any status quo is an equilibrium. We live in a state of equilibrium now. We might not like it, but it's equilibrium nonetheless. Pay to play sounds miserable.. I didn't make any qualitative comments, reality happens,…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/24 03:13 AM
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Not sure what you mean by "fixing". Natural forces always find an equilibrium, and the state of equilibrium is always shifting. If both sides are constantly bitter, constantly assuming malice, then how do things get better? Men and women, as a group, and often individually, have been treating one another adversarial, pointing finger at one another, and both sides playing the victim's card. The solution to any conflict resolution is Dialectic where the 2 sides sit down and find commonalities wher…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/24 03:03 AM
2

I have always liked career women in STEM/Business. If my income were to that level, it would not change the type of women that I am attracted to. And I don't think I am unique, one's income level doesn't affect who they are attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 11:18 PM
2

Couldn't agree more. The worst? Everybody Loves Raymond. The poor guy is abused 24/7.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 11:14 PM
1

Well if I missed your point it's because your point is stupid.. thank you for your teaching u/EvilManDevil
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 11:09 PM
2

In theory, all people, not just men, should "fix" themselves before entertaining the idea of a relationship with any kid. Realistically speaking, most people have "issues", from mild to wild. And, still realistically speaking, it's impossible to ask for "full disclosure". But there are tell-tales, and often people with "issues" seek or are attracted to other people with the same type of issues or complementary issues. And the circus continues.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 11:08 PM
1

Affairs are being normalized. By the end of this decade, there will be some new euphemism to describe it. Wait for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 11:05 PM
1

That's my point. You missed my point. Oh well. Best of luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 11:02 PM
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When 2 groups are fighting, fighting over who is fighting more doesn't improve anything. I strongly believe in the power of dialectic, but that can only happen is both parties are willing to cooperate, you know, together?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 10:49 PM
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These are very challenging times for everyone in any field, but especially with "gender roles" and "identity". The fact that men and women are often fighting and treating each other as enemies doesn't help. Even this sub is called debate, a better name and strategy would be dialectic. At the end of the day it's up to each one of us to live to the best of our abilities, making the most out of our time here an Earth, and strive to make the world a better place as we improve ourselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/24 11:01 PM
1

Some yes. But then it's the same the other way around. People are people.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/24 03:25 AM
1

Rush to a new situationship, a rebound so to speak, the more shallow the better.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/24 03:24 AM
1

Meanwhile, women are allowed to be as neurotic and anti-social as they please. LOL, no they are not "allowed". The ones who are neurotic and anti-social: either find someone who is desperate enough to put up with those traits, but unfortunately, it doesn't last #OUC or attract individuals who are seeking those traits, and #DOUBLE_OUCH. Low-value individuals will either be alone long term or find someone who is also low-value. There's a threshold which is hard to quantify but most people can unde…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 11:14 PM
0

Confidence Confidence Confidence True and well-rounded intelligent people have confidence. Confident people are truly kind, not just a façade of the nice guy/nice girl.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 11:10 PM
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The entire reasoning is flawed: you spend that money on those things for yourself, and not for dating, or at least that should be your mindset. when women spend money haircuts, pedicures, and manicures spend that money on those things for themselves, and not for dating, or at least that should be their mindset. The moment someone does those things for the sake of dating, it becomes shallows and it's a sign that the mindset if faulty and flawed. What does self-improvement achieve? Improve the sel…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 11:02 PM
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Some people find other things to be way more intimate. Like what? Care to share some examples?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/24 08:49 PM
5

Of course! It's called NOrmal Distribution and rules nature. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Normal_distribution
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/24 08:44 PM
1

It depends on the guy they are with.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/24 12:36 PM
1

Not everyone, some are tied to their financial success. Some other to both. Then there are the narcissists/psychopaths, and it is hard to categorize their priorities. Some others are instead well balanced.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/24 11:54 PM
1

For example: "Even if I am broke, he must have money." "Even if I don't have a car, he must have one." "Even if I don't have my own place, he must have one." "Even if I don't have a good job, he must have one. "Even if I don't go the gym, he must be fit." When I was single, when I told people that my ideal LTR woman was someone who brings to the tables roughly what I am bringing to the table I was told that I had unreasonable expectations. Oh well, I did a lot of casual dating, and then one day …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/24 11:33 PM
1

It has been like that for quite a while (I'm old). Always assure you're not exclusive until both parties have voluntarily had the exclusivity talk and they have both enthusiastically and unequivocally agreed to be monogamous. And, last but not least, they have both agreed on the meaning of "cheating". If you have been on Reddit for longer than 7.5 weeks you know what I mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/24 11:29 PM
1

Insecurity.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 08:30 PM
3

OP: I understand your English writing, but I don't understand the point that you are trying to make, or the question.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 08:28 PM
9

Why do so many gay men get along with straight women? It's actually the other way around, it's very caché for a woman to have 1 gay guy BFF. It's a good synergy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 03:37 PM
2

The have-not(s) hate the people who have what they don't. It's like the "eat the rich" movement.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 04:28 AM
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Hank Moody said it best: when a woman meets a guy she puts him into one of three buckets: fuck him marry him ignore him
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 04:25 AM
1

I disagree. A person successful in dating brings something to the table; and they have their preferences. Preferences is what they expect the other party to bring to the table, and the successful ones bring at the very least the same or comparable. For instance, someone with a PhD would probably want someone dedicated, and not a high school dropout. A doctor would want someone financially stable, and not someone crippled with consumer debt in a dead-end job. Someone who is into fitness and had a…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 04:24 AM
1

There's no solution. The problem is systematic; most everyone starts off as "the battle of the sexes", trying to put blame and burden on the other parties, with no collaboration. A good principle would be to start with dialectic and people work together to find commonalities and solutions and ways to negotiate differences.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 04:18 AM
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want to fuck them, and want to marry them not necessarily marry them, some of those on the top 10% are not "financially viable" hence they are not marriage material, just a fun ride.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 04:09 AM
1

" Is there actually a kind of relationship where the woman is the adorer ? " Yes, when the guy has a (much) higher "appeal" than the woman. Think about football players in High School, or NFL, or musicians from semi-famous to famous for instance. These are just examples. " what kind of guy get this treatment?" . See above.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 04:07 AM
1

Of course! "I'm single because there's nobody good enough for me." The Fox & the Grapes A Fox one day spied a beautiful bunch of ripe grapes hanging from a vine trained along the branches of a tree. The grapes seemed ready to burst with juice, and the Fox's mouth watered as he gazed longingly at them. The bunch hung from a high branch, and the Fox had to jump for it. The first time he jumped he missed it by a long way. So he walked off a short distance and took a running leap at it, only to fall…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/24 11:57 PM
2

It's called casual dating. I'm old, it was a thing in the 90's, I learned it the hard way. Don't fight it, use The Force.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/24 11:52 PM
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The implication is that men are supposed to be okay with this A couple of things: This has been the reality for a very long time. Never assume exclusivity until both parties have agreed explicitly and enthusiastically to be exclusive. And you have also agreed on what constitutes "cheating". You'd be surprised. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. Guys can do and should be doing the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/24 01:34 AM
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I agree with you, I believe that in a few years men will have to pay hard cash for the privilege to go an a date, pay-to-play so to speak.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 01:25 AM
2

Ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/24 02:05 AM
1

Partly it has to do with education, more women graduate college these days than men; and college educated women want someone who has at least their same level of education. And I don't blame them. I am a guy and education is important to me, and while I am now married (to a smart and educated woman), when I was dating I was not attracted to uneducated women, not even for FWBs or casual dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/24 02:01 AM
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There are studies that shows that most SA happen when all parties are intoxicated (drugs and/or alcohol).
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/24 06:53 PM
1

With hookups being normalized among under 30 crowds ... Hooking up is normalized among under 60 crowd... the Future is not what it used to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/24 06:47 PM
1

Is it possible for people to lower their standards through therapy? Lower their standards or get a reality check? If someone's a 2, and they are looking for a 9 or 10, then maybe therapy or a very good friend might be able to give them a reality check and readjust their aim. Unfortunately this is one of the main issue, if not the main issue, in the dating world today, and there's no way for these individual to become reasonable. It might actually be self-sabotage where unconsciously they do that…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 06:54 PM
1

Are male dating coaches ruining modern dating? LOL, nope. Modern dating is the way it is because, like everything else, it has evolved. If you want to apply the label that it's "ruined", it was not ruined by dating coaches, men or women, these dating coaches are just exploiting the situation, targeting desperate people and selling them "hope". That's all.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 02:05 PM
3

It's about people, not gender. Some people mature early in life, some people never mature.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 02:03 PM
1

IMO if someone (woman or man) "settles" because they can't get what they really want, it's a recipe for disaster since with time they will grow more and more stressed to the point of breakage. Note: this is also true for delusional people, for instance when a 2 wants a 10, and "settles" for a 7.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 02:02 PM
0

Average in what? Looks? Get an above-average job that pays you a lot of money.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 05:00 AM
1

Height Since when height is a personality trait?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 04:59 AM
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There are pros and cons to both.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 04:56 AM
2

Not really. Women who are looking for "attractive male" have a lot of competition from other women who are seeking the same category of males; and for each guy considered an "attractive male" by women, there's more than 1 woman competing for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 04:55 AM
1

There's a minority of people who experience hookup culture; the rest, the majority, who doesn't experience much sex. Serious dating is as rare as the dodo bird. To put it differently: single people who are having a sex life, experience mostly casual sex; single people who are not experience casual sex, are not experiencing sex at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 04:51 AM
2

I am an older Redditor. When I was young, I used to date older women, then at one point I started dating younger women, and never stopped. My present wife is a lot younger than me. So I have dated a lot of women who were younger/a lot younger then me. There are some women who just like older men, as simple as that. Just like there are men who like older women, and some like younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 04:47 AM
1

at least to make certain women more sexually interested Yeah, I am not interested in that type of women. #EASY
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 10:31 PM
1

I want to be wanted, not needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 07:57 PM
1

Yes. In both men and women. What is the alternative? Non-confident people really are a mess. IO used to be one.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 07:56 PM
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Which asshole behaviors and traits are actually widely considered attractive? None. Confident behavior is often mislabeled as "asshole behavior".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 07:55 PM
1

As a guy if you had to choose, would you choose to be very physically attractive or have a successful career? Physically attractive! To be honest, I have both, thanks to hard work at the gym and in my education and more. I am married now, but when I was single I would downplay my career. Women are attracted to "physical attractiveness" and to "successful career" for 2 different, incompatible, reasons. I am married now, and my wife is both physically attractive and very successful in her career. …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 07:53 PM
1

What does this mean for the state of dating and relationships ? What should someone do if they aren't overweight and don't want to date someone who is? It means that the pool of compatible candidates shrinks exponentially. Later in life, I started lifting, and I was able to get toned/muscular; and with that, I started to be attracted only to women who are also toned, as opposed to skinny because they starve themselves. Combined to the fact that I am older, and the pool of suitable women shrank d…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 07:48 PM
1

If I need to be perfectly happy alone for a partner to find a partner to like me, why would I want a partner in the first place? I was raised the same way: a partner/relationship is what would make me happy. That's a BIG burden to put on someone else, and - IMO - a recipe for disaster. Nobody can make anyone else happy, but they can make them miserable. 2 happy people, together, can go places that they can never go individually: the sky is not the limit, it's the launching pad!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 07:35 PM
1

I am old(er) and these are my observations: It was not that easy. The present situation is complex. Back in the days a college undergraduate degree assured a career. The boat sailed long time ago. Today a single-career life is also gone, long time ago. What one needs in today's world: A graduate degree is the bare minimum. Best if from a top school, and best if with honors, and best if with interesting coursework. STEM or business. All other majors have low chances of a decent-paying job Continu…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 07:33 PM
1

So, are you saying that men and women manifest different traits?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 02:58 AM
0

stereotypically masculine Aren't stereotypes "dangerous"? Borderline sexist when they refer to sex? Just saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 02:55 AM
3

Of, so can a woman manifest toxic masculinity? And can a guy manifest toxic femininity?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 02:52 AM
2

LOL. This might be the best comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 02:51 AM
2

There's a BIG difference between masculinity and toxic masculinity, NSSH! One is toxic, the other one is not. I was curious about the difference between toxic masculinity and toxic femininity. If any.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 02:49 AM
2

Can you expand on that?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 02:46 AM
1

In every homogeneous group of individuals, a small minority ruins it for everyone. Men, women, co-workers, any organization. IN a way, the Pareto principle explains it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/23 01:32 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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