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AshaStars Archive

View 8 posts and 37 comments by AshaStars on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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64

This post was articulate as fuck and don't let the scrotes bother you. This needs to be an op-ed pinned to the front of the New York Times.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 04:39 AM
0

"clearly FDS isn't for you" jesus christ, for the record I'm a literal teenager and fds saved my sanity and safety, so you have no reason to be this antagonistic and you're only proving my point about the defensiveness. yeah I could see some radfems being mad that FDS upholds a few gender roles, I could see them getting mad that we don't criticize beauty standards extensively bc that's not the scope of FDS, etc. My criticism still stands about the podcast hosts being too obsessed with defending …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 06:03 AM
2

I literally did not give myself the throwaway account flair and it isn't a throwaway; the mods gave it to me. We never said anything against your legit criticism of brigading, we pointed out the title, the perceived backlash against radfems when if anything you only have an issue with extremist tangential radfem thinking, and the fact that not dating is...a legit dating strategy, and it is very much FDS spirit to point that out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 05:57 AM
4

yes, exactly. The general bent of the podcasts and mods' posts is justifying ourselves and explaining what the purpose of FDS is and what people get wrong, when this is exactly the WRONG move for women to be making. We waste so much time and energy justifying things we don't need to justify. IK they need to protect the subreddit from being taken down, but this is just...no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 04:12 AM
32

k I already commented here but to add another thing--not dating men is important for pickmes who need to recover and find a sense of self, at least temporarily. If you're used to putting up with bullshit from men, you DO absolutely need to take some time away from the dating field to sort out your life. So you shouldn't be antagonizing women who choose not to date, because that in itself IS a dating strategy, and if anything it's the most important one. Men are desperate for female attention, an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 08:31 PM
38

I liked the majority of this podcast, but I get what the people opposing it are saying. FDS literally is based on radfem principles for the most part (maybe not the extreme separatist principles, but based on the same analysis and critique), and the title is irresponsible; you can't put radfems in the same group as all the others. OFC this is properly explained in the actual podcast, but people do see the title as their initial impression and will read it as anti-radfem, and Lilith and Savannah …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 06:41 PM
38

Can OP message the girl or dm me her @? this is a rescue mission, so someone pls talk to her
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 09:56 PM
8

She looks on the verge of a breakdown. And then he'll call her hysterical for having one. Whoever posted this--can we have a rescue mission and dm the girl on tiktok to get her out of there?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/21 03:05 AM
16

The issue I have with this is that, if you have a fair traditional relationship (husband works and wife is a SAHM), this shouldn't equate to the woman being submissive or the man having more authority. Both partners should have equal authority in their sphere of work. SAHM's work LONGER shifts than men do in most cases--it's a 24/7 job to look after a baby or a toddler, and men should be working to support them and then working additional hours alongside them to take some childcare pressure off …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/21 03:02 AM
1

Why do you have the pickmeisha flair lol? This is very sound advice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 07:24 AM
2

I'm actually worried about this pretty often, because I wear a lot of dresses (cover ALL my skin though, from a conservative background)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 01:52 AM
8

I'm 18F as well and when I was 17 I dated a 29M who sounded EXACTLY LIKE THIS. It's tragic how relatable this is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 03:05 AM
9

I've confronted her about things like this before and she says it's a symptom of my "BPD" when I confront her because I'm getting "upset easily." I'm like, WTF? She's very condescending and refuses to admit she could ever have done anything wrong, and she discounts pretty much everything I say because she's the one with a PhD. (She did, however, once imply to me that I was "manipulating her" because I'm smarter than other kids my age and am therefore capable of manipulating her...until she decid…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 01:48 AM
1

oh my god :((
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 01:45 AM
2

Thank you. All the responses here really helped, esp. this one. Next time I see her, I'm going to confront her about what she said and explain that it's illogical, unprofessional and amounts to silencing. I have to try. But I don't think she'll listen, as last time I tried to confront her, she chalked it up to being a "symptom of BPD" (which I didn't have in the first place) because I was "angry with her" (I wasn't, merely frustrated at being silenced). THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 01:45 AM
16

OH MY GOD. SHE ACTUALLY DID THIS. She gave me an (incorrect) BPD diagnosis when I was only 16 (which is too young an age to diagnose it correctly--usually they wait til the woman is at least 20). The moment I left the environment that was causing my "hysteria," the "BPD" went away. I never had it in the first place. I really want to switch therapists, but I can't. But I'm so relieved that I'm not insane, that y'all understand how hard it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 01:35 AM
37

The problem with liberal feminists is that they think casual sex is fine as long as you "consent," but consent here is a strawman for what is actually required, which is complete safety, commitment, and complete physical and emotional trust. Stripping this down to "consent" alone allows them to justify women having casual hookups to their own detriment. "Consent" when represented correctly should be part of a larger committed and trusting relationship where safety in every department is paramoun…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 09:50 PM
2

Also, women have seasons in their lives much moreso than men do. They're capable of raising/teaching the next generation and working professionally when they want to, provided that they have support and opportunities. This is the only financial arrangement that allows that flexibility.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 08:17 PM
3

I'm also Muslim, and u/3alabali is correct that this is how it works in our religion. Basically finances are ultimately his responsibility but you reserve the right to work and earn your own money within your ability. This is the most flexible and reasonable arrangement, because if/when the couple has a child, the woman is free to take time off work and knows she will be taken care of, and when she's able and willing, she can go back to work full or part time. It allows her to divide her time be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 08:15 PM
1

Facts^^
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 05:29 AM
42

yes this is a good point, women feel obligated to reproduce and therefore have to accept men's terrible behavior. I feel that the only way to fix this is to curtail the logical fallacy inherent in the assumption--show women that not reproducing is significantly better than reproducing with a man who is likely to abuse you and your children. Reproducing with such a man is unconscionable. Women need to learn to see things this way instead of feeling like reproducing with abusive men is a virtue. I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 08:15 AM
3

yes, this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 05:04 AM
3

I really love this! How did you recover well enough to find an HVM? Did you take time off dating to heal? I'm kinda scared that trauma makes me attractive to LVM at this point
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 03:45 AM
31

Oh my God this is genius!!! The clarifications especially!!! You're right it's correlation does not IMPLY causation and also THEY WERE ALREADY DUMB lmfao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 03:35 AM
24

See, this is exactly it. I actually do want to have children, love the idea of motherhood, but it isn't respected, men are useless as partners, and the majority of men I meet make me scared to have children with them. Like why TF would I have children with a man that I wouldn't trust to be around my children? If motherhood was actually supported and valued and men were decent partners capable of supporting families, I'm fairly certain most women would want to have children. And if they had suppo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 12:26 AM
5

Don't ever apologize for your brilliance <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 08:06 PM
5

haha facts! Yeah I'd open doors and pay dinner bills if I was rejecting him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 08:06 PM
29

Honestly, the mods should frame this post and put it in the FDS handbook. I'm proud of myself for this post. It's queenly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 06:36 AM
140

Definitely true and is confirmed in Lundy Bancroft's Why Does He Do That (which all girls should read). Anger management is pretty much never the real issue, since he controls his anger around everyone else. It's entitlement and immorality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 10:42 PM
2

Yes, am working with a therapist! <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:28 AM
2

This is what I've been doing so far since the latest altercation and it's working well! It just requires extraordinary willpower not to engage when you're being belittled or messed with and desperately want to respond. Unfortunately, responding just gives him more fuel with which he can mess with me, so I'm working on developing that willpower and getting much better at it :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:27 AM
21

A lot of pickmeishas project themselves as high-maintenance by chasing designer wear and luxury items; therefore, owning these things doesn't necessarily signal high-value. High value means you have a balanced combination of assets: You take care of yourself physically, but you don't obsess over your appearance to the point of insecurity or spend an irresponsible amount of money on purchases that don't serve you. I would definitely say a HVW takes care of her appearance and personal style within…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:23 AM
70

Leave him! And definitely DO NOT GO to his place for sex, wtf?! He's already ignored your boundaries by pressuring you after you suggested not doing it. You owe him nothing. This is concerning. Turn him down, politely if you're worried about retaliation, and cut off the relationship. He will only get more coercive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 04:02 AM
1

Wouldn't it be better to have voice verification for those without social media?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 09:29 PM
1

It's the complete lack of a support network. Absolutely NO ONE knows about the situation besides him, and he's the source of the situation, so...I have no idea what to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 08:42 PM
1

Thank you for your response. My problem is that there's zero support. I'd be able to stay away if I had something to occupy me, probably, but my family doesn't know and would be furious with ME (not him) if they found out, for cultural reasons. First quarter of college is online for corona reasons, and my family is incredibly strict--even with restrictions lifted, my movements are extremely controlled, yet somehow I still find ways to see him. I don't know what to do, because I don't trust mysel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 08:41 PM
2

Thank you for the advice. I think I failed to make clear that I'm pretty sure I'm the problem here. If I managed to cut contact entirely, he wouldn't chase me, I'm fairly certain of that. It's ME who keeps being attached to him, and he responds every time, and the trauma bond is so fucking strong I keep self sabotaging. It's me. I brought this upon myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 01:57 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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