AstuteStoat Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	Do you know of any anti-red pill channels that address this issue with empathy? Ok, thanks for the clarification! so why do you need a channel about mental health to "get you"? I feel I asked the question in a meandering way before? Because hard work can involving collecting a wide range of opinions and options and trying them iut to see what works for you. When you say you need a channel that gets you, it sounds like you want people to coddle you and spoon feed you comforting information.	/r/ExRedPill	03/02/26 08:25 PM
2	Do you know of any anti-red pill channels that address this issue with empathy? God, I hope that's sarcasm. If so, it's a good additude for emotionally distancing yourself from your problems so you never feel like you need to solve them. So, I'm goong with 1) youre looking for excuses/reasons to not change. Otherwise you would be looking for excuses/reasons to keep trying on different perspectives that might not feel comfortable at first.	/r/ExRedPill	03/02/26 12:36 PM
2	When women actions align with certain claims about redpill In general, how to break out if assumptions is to try on new assumptions. And the safest assumption is to assume you don't actually know enough about them to be sure. So, journaling helps a lot of people work out theri thoughts, so you could start a journal (could be entirely online if you want. Where when you catch yourself in an assumption, you try to figure out how/when would you know for sure if that assumption is actually true. It helps to have a counter opinion and also try to prove that t…	/r/ExRedPill	03/02/26 03:08 AM
3	My sister To mirror what others are saying therapy is important because getting to the specific intersection of what's contributing to the thoughs the issue is difficult and not necessarily something you'd want to share online, even anyonymously because it could be too revealing. Did you have a particular trauma that contributed to obsessive thoughts on those topics? Did you already have a tendency for obsessive thoughts? fear can also contribute to obsessions and that intersection can be particularly dif…	/r/ExRedPill	03/02/26 02:51 AM
3	Do you know of any anti-red pill channels that address this issue with empathy? Healthy gamer isn't an anti red pill channel, Dr K has said there are elements of redpill that are healthy, like encouraging guys to work on their physical fitness. And he also doesn't just focus on "anti" red pill stuff, it's more just he touches on red pill as one of the many mental health topics he covers. I'm a woman and I don't feel like I'm the target audience for healthy gamer, but I still learn a lot of useful things about myself and others on the channel. ... So, what specifically are y…	/r/ExRedPill	03/02/26 01:59 AM
5	How do I stop romantically distrusting women when they have judged me for my bisexual past? I'm going with the find women who are better allies and get therapy so you don't sabotage your chances with the next woman because of past bad experiences.	/r/ExRedPill	31/01/26 10:19 PM
2	Never dated and anxious about the future/ resentment of gender roles There are ways to do it sensibly, the key is to not be pushy. And to accept a NO answer and let it affect your attraciton to them in the sense that you shouldn't be as attracted to people who aren't interedted in you like that.	/r/ExRedPill	31/01/26 07:42 PM
11	Never dated and anxious about the future/ resentment of gender roles Part of the struggle for someone your age is all of gen z is relatively reclusive compared to previous generations. The only comfort(?) I can offer is that while we assume men should cold aproach women, most part, people apparently actually knew each other before deciding to date. And I've personally never dated strangers, and have long recommended the friend-to-partner pathway. I'm also autistic, so maybe it was just my way of rejecting what wasn't working for me. https://www.psychologytoday.co…	/r/ExRedPill	30/01/26 10:31 PM
1	I believe that my sixteen year old brother has been red-pilled. Open to interpretation, I’d love to chat. Ahh, yeah, I could see how he gets a message from her that she doesn't think she's teaching him. It might help your mom to follow and take note of good men, we rate dogs, those animal channels like the dodo and geobests can pretty often feature a guy who saved an animal. and i think the way other guys can be so threatening, mindfully learning how to distinguish between gokd and bad guys might help her talk more about what a good man is specifically, rather than just talking broadly. I also like …	/r/ExRedPill	30/01/26 10:17 PM
2	I believe that my sixteen year old brother has been red-pilled. Open to interpretation, I’d love to chat. I'm a woman with limited direct experience, but I spent a few years specifically focused on men's issues from a feminist perspective. I'm gender gray and was raised to be masculine, so it was an issue I had a personal need to address my own men's issues and feminism didn't (and probably shouldn't) cover much, so there is a big gap in how we think about men's mental health. So consider this a bunch of thoughts to consider. One of the things that I notice with a lot of guys, is in their friend gro…	/r/ExRedPill	30/01/26 03:35 PM
3	What's a good way to find people for relationships these days? Odly specific list of hobbies where you might become a part of a community: Net Runner Join a Streamer's discord Look for men's mental health groups in your area - get evaluated for ADHD or Autism depending on your suspicions. then join groups related to that. Black smithing As for the pet part: Can you visit cat cafes and get to know the staff there to start to get a reference? Would the animal shelters let you volunteer to walk the more agreeable dogs to help them get to know you? Maybe just k…	/r/ExRedPill	29/01/26 08:04 PM
3	A Better Apology I haven't seen the original post, and I don't know how helpful it can be, but since it seems you're in a better head space now here's some stuff for you to consider. Why do you want people to tell you you're hopeless? That sounds like a terrible thing to do to yourself. I certainly understand not wanting to instill a massive false hope, but recognize that until you've scientifically proven somethig is impossible, you don't know when a hope is completely false. So, instead of engaging in "thought…	/r/ExRedPill	29/01/26 07:50 PM
5	What do you think about TikTok's relationship standards? What do you think about the idea that these standards should be respected? It's also just so reductive. They reduce the beautiful variation of an entire population into one pattern where everyone "should" aspire to behave identically. It's cult like and gives me the creeps.	/r/ExRedPill	27/01/26 08:42 PM
1	Could Jordan Petterson be one of the voices of the manosphere? They say he's a very good psychologist. I don't like him at all. What don't you like about him specifically?	/r/ExRedPill	24/01/26 01:57 AM
15	Could Jordan Petterson be one of the voices of the manosphere? They say he's a very good psychologist. I don't like him at all. Oh my god, I was skimming and thought you were trying to say something, I didn't realize this was Jordan peterson's writing. He's very clearly trying to be confusing so he looks smart to people who don't know better.	/r/ExRedPill	24/01/26 01:56 AM
13	my oneitis As a 40+ year old, this is when you should have ended the relationship if you were emotionally well adjusted: We argued constantly. In many of those arguments, she crossed serious boundaries. Boundaries are about what you do when they're crossed. And it sound like you didn't do anything meaningful when she crossed your boundaries. A person with healthy boundaries walks away, ends relationships if they feel they can't trust someone to respect the boundary. You might have something like codependen…	/r/ExRedPill	22/01/26 08:29 PM
2	My experience with women being normie at 16 years old. It almost sounds like uou know you should work on your character but you're addicted to looking better. An addiction is when you do something that feels good in the moment, but in the long run makes you feel worse, and then it stops you from doing the work you need to do to stop feeling bad to begin with. You need to work on your mental health. If you don't feel like you have the resolve/control to do that, talk to your primary care doctor about it you might need a referal for a media detox and …	/r/ExRedPill	19/01/26 09:28 AM
3	Opinions on Connor Beaton/ManTalks? I haven't watched many videos. Just parused a few because you asked. Considering where you've been, he seems like an alright transitional channel out of the way you're thinking, but I would hope you're looking for more professional input after a while. And moving onto next steps. My biggest concern is he has no actual credentials, and I don't see any posted reason why he in particular would use himself as an example to look to for mental health. That feels like a grift to me, like he doesn't wan…	/r/ExRedPill	18/01/26 08:00 PM
3	The RedPill ruined my life and I’m attempting to pick up the pieces and rebuild my life… Can you listen to podcasts at work? Maybe you can look for female hosts for topics you're interested in. I'm sure it's probably not as effective as real friends, but it might help? Like, maybe listening to old episodes of sci show? The science expert Ceri Riley strikes me as one of the sweetest people and I didn't watch many episodes. Maybe watching people who clean hoarder homes etc. like Clean with Bea seems like a good channel to start with and a lot of people like to watch the videos them se…	/r/ExRedPill	17/01/26 11:48 PM
2	Worried that love is shallow, as evolutionary psychologists and neuroscientists suggest with how they write about it. Is there evidence that it isn't? Her values as in the things she values, like in the example video, the wife valued actions more than gifts.	/r/ExRedPill	14/01/26 11:48 PM
4	Worried that love is shallow, as evolutionary psychologists and neuroscientists suggest with how they write about it. Is there evidence that it isn't? I don't know if he sees her as high status rather than as someone he personally values inside and out. So, because his sense of her value is coming from within himself, rather than from other people's opinions, stepping up feels intrinsically worth it. So, If a person doesn't feel worth the effort you put into the relationship, then you're either in the wrong relationship or one or both of you need therapy. And the point was that instead of dwelling on something you have limited control over, co…	/r/ExRedPill	14/01/26 08:42 AM
2	Worried that love is shallow, as evolutionary psychologists and neuroscientists suggest with how they write about it. Is there evidence that it isn't? Did you stop reading there? it feels like you missed the point. Even the most depressing data about attractiveness doesn't gave to apply to you, date smarter not harder. There are two videos I've found by a creator, Will, who is exredpill himself (which is what lead me to this page, because I'm curious about the guys who decide to leave redpill.) And he highlighted two positive videos of guys who are married, and personally, I don't see either of the the guys as very physically attractive especi…	/r/ExRedPill	13/01/26 06:24 AM
10	Its getting very scary to be a woman, or am I just paranoid? In many ways, yeah, it can be bad out there. That's why a lot of women are focusing on everyother part of their life than dating. I'm an introvert so I've always been that way. A pot of guys begin to see the unfairness of redpill and make their way out, and others still never fall for it. I just think that any dating done through a "dating system" like apps or speed dating is going to be full of guys that fall for that stuff, so while you still might find the right guy, you're probably going to …	/r/ExRedPill	13/01/26 01:57 AM
4	Worried that love is shallow, as evolutionary psychologists and neuroscientists suggest with how they write about it. Is there evidence that it isn't? I appreciate that you asked the question too. I had written up a bunch of stuff about how using science as personal guidance is less about believing a specific study, and more about thinking of other studies that might challenge assumptions, and doing your best. And I know that by asking the question, you already understand that everything I'm saying below is possible, so, I'm more just saying it because it bears repeating, in case someone else needs to hear it. So, back to how people use resear…	/r/ExRedPill	12/01/26 12:40 AM
3	I’m worried that my dad is becoming red-pilled I don't have a lot of advice, because you don't have much sway over someone who doesn't value your opinion, and them being an older family member just makes the effect worse. You mentioned in your reply how your parents are from a culture where they don't value therapy. It also sounds like your mom might also believe in staying even when the other partner isn't reciprocating support. Most of my advice is for your mother. If the Grandmother and Father don't like the contributions she's she brings…	/r/ExRedPill	11/01/26 12:52 PM
16	Worried that love is shallow, as evolutionary psychologists and neuroscientists suggest with how they write about it. Is there evidence that it isn't? I think this might be the crux of the issue. Have we been doing the right research? the following quotes are from here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/social-instincts/202108/how-often-friends-become-lovers/amp Our research reveals that relationship initiation studies published in popular journals and cited in popular textbooks overwhelmingly focus on a romance that sparks between strangers and largely overlooks romance that develops between friends. This limited focus might be justifie…	/r/ExRedPill	10/01/26 11:39 AM
3	How to red pill detox? I'm not a guy and not ex red pill, but one of the therapists I follow on youtube seems to be particularly helpful to guys, you might have heard of him. He's Dr K with healthy gamer gg. Hypothetically, any licensed therapist should be a good place to turn to try to understand relationships and mental health, but Dr K seems to be particularly good for guys who are tempted by that thinking. I think he's better because is he is more personally familiar with the types of guys that end up in a red pil…	/r/ExRedPill	10/01/26 12:26 AM
12	Do you know any women who love their stay-at-home husbands? I'm young, 17, and I'm coming off the red pill. Kate Winslet aparently loves her stay at home husband, he is dislexic, so I think that affects the kinds of work he can do, but she does nothing but gush about the guy. and they both look content together. It doesn't look like one is slowly sucking the energy out of the other, they both look happy. I looked it up before commenting, and this is the article I found: https://www.harpersbazaar.com/celebrity/latest/a63512673/who-is-edward-abel-smith-kate-winslet-husband/	/r/ExRedPill	08/01/26 10:43 PM
4	Falling down the incel pipeline has made me realize how unintelligent I really am. My default assumption is the guy is young rather than unintelligent. Intelligence is learning from your mistakes. Seems like you're doing just fine. reducing social media is always a good idea, and you need to decide for yourself if you're capable of regulating it to a sensible amount.	/r/ExRedPill	02/01/26 06:54 AM
4	My struggles with dating/loneliness are starting to weigh on me mentally and emotionally. I feel like I'm starting to fall into the "Blackpill" mindset. How has your luck been with making friends with women and having regular interactions with them? Because the one thing I'm potentially detecting here is you know how to socialize with guys, but you don't know how to socialize with women. I'm adhd and autistic and most of my friends have always been guys because I'm also bad at understanding a lot if the nuance but also because of my own trauma, but it's wild to me how interactions with women are just different. It's great to be able to log in wi…	/r/ExRedPill	31/12/25 10:54 PM
1	How do I get over patriarchal views for women? If therapy is a possibility then consider exploring different kinds, part of me thinks something like EMDR might help. so, basically the parts of our brain don't talk to eachother very well, and yourl might be experiencing this bu having your old thoughts resurface, and so EMDR uses various ways to stimulate both sides of the brain to help thoughts integrate better. It's usually used in trauma therapy, but I also think the way Red pill makes the dating scene feel very threatening and competitive…	/r/ExRedPill	31/12/25 03:02 AM
5	my GF checking out other dudes A few people suggest you could talk to her about it, but I want to talk about how that conversation can go. Because if she tells you she's not and you don't believe her, then there's a chance you're not suited to being in a relationshpp with her and need to break it off. Obviously you should try to decide if you want to work through it, like with therapy. But ultimately if you can't believe her, it doesn't matter if she's doing it intentionally, for unfaithful reasons or if you're just exaggerat…	/r/ExRedPill	30/12/25 06:58 PM
1	The Red Pill and Narcissistic Mothers I've seen it in others and I didn't have any idea of what to do about it. It's great that you were able to make this realization! A therapist I like, Patrick Teahan, made a series on toxic parents effect on their kids, so I'm linking the video on toxic mother's effect on their sons. https://youtu.be/btgRMHZUVgY?si=6RqY-LedbrX5CI29 I haven't watched them yet, because I'm not in the right headspace. But I love this guy because he has a way of organizing information that's at least a good start for…	/r/ExRedPill	30/12/25 09:01 AM
3	Being vulnerable is bad I don't see it that way at all. When I'm vulnerable and someone reacts in a toxic way, I have my clear answer to cut that person off. If you keep the relationship shallow, you're inadvertently keeping toxic people around. I'm a woman, and I'd rather go crazy from loneliness than keep a toxic person around.	/r/ExRedPill	22/12/25 06:45 PM
4	Can we all agree black pill is wrong? It's long been known that guys don't have to be as attractive to be successful in society, including in dating. And that in guys, self confidence has a lot to do with attractiveness. Their posture changes, the way they hold their face changes. A lot of guys confuse confidence with bravado and try to act over confident and an obvious cover for insecurity, which is not attractive. I ended up here because I stumbled on will hitchins and I was curious how his experiences match other people's and the…	/r/ExRedPill	16/12/25 09:48 PM
1	I think I may be starting to doubt the 80/20 rule and I may be more attractive than I think. It's hard to describe. Because most of it is subconscious. So, first I want to describe how hard it was to get me started feeling safe. First I had to learn what family felt like. And, it took me getting married, having a pretty good marriage, getting divorced, getting sick, and having my exhusband always being there to drive me to the hospital never acting like it was a problem for me to understand that he genuinely cared about me for me, not because he wanted to have sex with me. (There's a lo…	/r/ExRedPill	13/12/25 10:15 AM
6	I think I may be starting to doubt the 80/20 rule and I may be more attractive than I think. So, I'm a woman and I want to describe to you how my subconscious attraction system works. It's been wild to learn about. and I think it might help you. Tl;dr: The short version is attraction level changes based on emotional connection and safety. So as long as you're not completely repulsive there's a solid chance someone who's compatible with you will like you. The 80/20 rule is probably made by people who feel very unsafe so they don't understand the emotional side of attraction and how shari…	/r/ExRedPill	10/12/25 07:29 AM
8	My Mom married a Red Piller (I'm Destroyed) I hear you, I'm sorry your mom is so determined to repeat her past mistakes in dating.	/r/ExRedPill	07/12/25 07:26 AM
10	My Mom married a Red Piller (I'm Destroyed) Are you in a country with Child Protective Services? It sounds like you'd be better off getting custody of your sister and finishing raising her yourself. Not great. But at least she's not in the middle of that abusive chaos.	/r/ExRedPill	07/12/25 06:39 AM
6	A few things I noticed in real life I love the observations about meeting women in person and how different it is from the internet. I'm a feminist woman here to learn more about red pill & what healing from it looks like and I feel like some online circles of feminism get sucked into men are only dangerous. Certain FB pages started to move me that way, but when I noticed (i was in my 30s) I unfollowed those pages and added more general good news pages to off set it. And I'm personally interested by false accusations. I try not to…	/r/ExRedPill	04/12/25 07:37 PM