BarnacleBill25 Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
3	The avoidant Let me tell you I have multiple books and hundreds of hours of attachment theory podcasts to discover this basic behavior. You have to look at a person’s past, not just how they treat you (which was awesome for years). Or just roll with it when the time is up.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/05/25 11:55 PM
2	The avoidant It’s turns out with further reading: limerence chemicals can overwhelm avoidance for a period of time. Mild depression also. But they both come back eventually. So we’re still married. I moved out for 9 months once, and I can see it potentially happening again.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/05/25 09:04 PM
8	The avoidant Welp, I married, not one, but two.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/05/25 08:35 PM
2	The avoidant There is a lot of behavioral overlap, hence the current crisis of narcissists everywhere all at once. Some people talk about “ethical avoidants” to distinguish. We shouldn’t try to diagnose from afar.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/05/25 08:34 PM
1	I married a single mom. Did I screw up? NMMNG for real. This is a solid example of the project woman.	/r/Divorce_Men	28/04/25 12:55 AM
1	I used to be nice… I feel it fading. True. I’m going to have to read/listen again.	/r/Divorce_Men	22/03/25 12:23 AM
1	I used to be nice… I feel it fading. That’s about a different problem than what he’s describing. Plus the book nearly invents a new definition of “nice” that I’m unsure is historically grammatically correct. Don’t get me wrong - I’ve read the book 3 times. (And Aziz’s Not Nice.)	/r/Divorce_Men	21/03/25 05:22 PM
2	Car crash conversation - now what? There seems to be an aggressive assumption of cheating. Meanwhile, professional counselors report actual rates of infidelity in women are like 1/6th of men’s. I don’t think this includes emotional entanglements. I recommend a podcast: the Husband Help Haven. This thing was a lifesaver in my first months. Things are aren’t resolved with the immediacy that you would want. These feelings take time to resolve. Invest in yourself. Revenge or over-analysis won’t solve her problems. I’m on month 1, 7, …	/r/Divorce_Men	19/11/24 03:01 AM
1	I made a mistake That’s a nice list actually	/r/Divorce_Men	09/11/24 03:01 AM
2	Ex-wife’s “Rolodex of hurt” Good series, thank you! On Spotify also	/r/Divorce_Men	23/10/24 07:12 PM
4	No More Mr. Nice Guy Try Dr. Aziz’s podcasts or his books, especially Not Nice. He’s got many exercises to help deal with the anxiety end of this. Aziz interviewed Glover (see it on YouTube). NMMNG was Aziz’s introduction to what is now his profession, social anxiety. I was part of a poorly moderated NMMNG group but left eventually because the red pill smell got too strong.	/r/Divorce_Men	23/10/24 05:39 PM