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Basic_Advance7627 Archive

View 1 posts and 417 comments by Basic_Advance7627 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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5

It took at least 5 years, but the pain still comes and goes at times
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/26 07:49 PM
7

Yes. Forever is rare nowadays. It’s the hardest and worst thing that ever happened to me, but I have survived and figure I can pretty much handle anything now.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/26 03:45 AM
10

They always 100% of the time downgrade, no matter what the guy looks like or how much money he has. He’s a cheater with a cheater.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 02:35 AM
13

Dude they always cheat down.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/26 03:00 AM
4

I guess that may be true. We had 3 kids and she gained quite a bit of weight, but I loved her more than anything and still thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world. She utterly shattered me.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/25 03:12 AM
18

My ex was fat and still managed to cheat with multiple men behind my back. If they’re willing to throw it out they’re will be someone willing to take it.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/25 09:48 PM
9

I’m all for you, but be wary. The system will beat you down and cost you tens of thousands. My own attorney told me to stop.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/25 02:19 AM
6

27 years of marriage when I found out. Over 4 years later unfortunately the after effects are still pretty strong. I’m not sure you ever really get over it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/25 03:53 AM
10

We were also religious people. My now ex wife had multiple affairs and became a harlot. Don’t know what happened, I guess that’s just who she has always been, I just wasn’t aware. Shame on me.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/25 01:24 AM
14

I really used to want too. Now, who cares. She got loverboy and after she cleaned me out I have more money than I ever had while they broke up and she’s stuck in a dinky apartment right beside his. Blowing up our family and a 27 year marriage was extremely rough on me but after over 4 years I’m in a decent emotional place however my trust is completely broken. I’m kinda a loner now.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/25 12:04 AM
6

Well before I ever knew. Heck she was taking him supper and leaving me peanut butter with the groceries I bought!
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 02:37 AM
1

I actually had to do it myself. I had 23 years government service. So I gave her the house equity, furniture and everything else to keep my retirement. I couldn’t bare the thought of giving it to a cheater. We were married 27 years btw.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/25 12:35 AM
1

Years down the road when you retire you certainly don’t want to give her half then. Bite the bullit now and give her the home equity
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 08:44 PM
3

You can’t. Just start doing your own thing and she can come along or not.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 12:57 AM
4

Very religious marriage so I thought for 27 years until I found out she was having multiple affairs. In the end marriage is always a leap of faith.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/25 11:18 PM
5

I’m telling you this is not true. Let everything come to light and you’ll see. Also, get a therapist for yourself to help frame everything correctly.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/25 11:16 PM
4

Mine was too. She met up with hers at the grocery store.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/25 11:14 PM
11

27 years and exactly the same situation and same reactions from me. It’s probably the hardest thing life can throw at you. I’ve lost people extremely close to me in death but those memories are intact, my memories of her were lies.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/25 11:13 PM
1

Exactly. Mine was cheating for years and did all the little things to turn my kids and get her buddies and parents on her side. It’s disgusting and evil. After a 27 year “good” marriage I’ve learned I will never be hurt like that again. I barely survived, never again.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/25 09:11 PM
8

Yep she’s cheating. This is straight out of the cheating wife’s manual.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/25 08:20 PM
5

When I left I spit tobacco in the crotch of her new underwear she’d bought for her AP
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/25 03:18 AM
12

This is the typical stuff they all say. It’s like they all have the same go to script. Usually they are cheating. May be hard to believe, but it’s usually the case.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/25 04:17 PM
2

Just gave her mine and she kept hers. She had multiple affairs over 27 years so I sure didn’t need a reminder.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/25 02:00 PM
7

The lies, the throwing away 27 years like nothing, her turning my kids against me, the multiple affairs I found out about.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/25 01:21 AM
2

I think me leaving may have traumatized my 3 kids, but they told m to move on, in hindsight I think they wanted me to wait for their mom. However she wasn’t interested, she was finished and I was in shock. I should have known because she’d been living in the basement for over a month saying she needed time and space. What a crock! I’ve learned over time there’s no way we could’ve stayed together because I would have never got the images out of my head and would have never forgiven her.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/25 06:24 PM
1

No judgement here. I left the day after I found out. We signed the papers and dissolved 27 years in a mere 2 weeks. I was blindsided and devastated because she wanted to be with loverboy as soon as possible. My kids were in shock. She systematically turned them against me for about 3 years. It’s finally better now. I gave her everything material thing we had with the exception of my pension. Now I have more money than I ever had and can actually retire someday. My big error was getting remarried…
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/25 12:47 AM
2

You’re correct. It was just tough getting to acceptance. I reckon I’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way. But, the wisdom I have now is pretty immense.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/25 04:11 PM
3

Absolutely agree. I do love my kids and grandkids though. Otherwise, I wish I’d never met her. It will be 4 years for me in April. Been in therapy about 3. I’m good with myself nowadays but it’s been a tough road.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/25 01:15 AM
3

27 years for me too. And yep, heard about some other prior affairs also. 27 years loving a piece of trash.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/25 06:14 AM
1

You’re the winner!
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/25 01:48 PM
3

Legally 50/50. Reality 0
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/25 01:05 AM
8

Yeah. Messes with your head.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/25 02:40 AM
2

A broken home and family but she can’t cheat on me anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/25 04:35 AM
6

Oh yeah she was so depressed she had time for multiple affairs behind my back while I was working to provide her lifestyle
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/25 06:36 PM
9

YES! Apparently mine was so depressed being around me she couldn’t do anything so I worked 60-65 hours a week to give her everything she wanted. Oh well 🤷‍♂️27 years down the tubes.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/25 06:35 PM
3

No. She’s a serial cheater. Refuse to be anywhere near her.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 03:00 AM
1

It’s taken me almost 4 years out from a 27 year marriage to a behind my back serial cheater. I still get angry if I think about her or loverboy or if I see her on the road. Truly it’s not worth it, they are both pure trash.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/24 04:14 AM
5

I’m pulling for you.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 12:41 PM
2

Be glad it wasn’t 27
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/24 02:37 AM
3

Went through my 50th like that after wife cheated, left and turned my kids. Keep going. 52 now and my kids have come back.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 02:01 AM
14

1.Get some therapy or at least level headed friends to help you. 2.Remember that she is now the enemy and will exploit you for everything she can, get a lawyer and don’t give up what is yours. 3.Don’t drink or give into any addictive bad behaviors, you need a clear head. 4.Think with your head and not your heart.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/24 02:16 AM
4

After you’ve been betrayed by infidelity I don’t think you ever fully trust a woman again.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 07:12 PM
10

I’m an environmental scientist and now I live with my mother after my wife of 27 years cheated with multiple men, then divorced and took everything.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 12:08 AM
5

Yep
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 08:56 PM
6

After almost 27 years she leaves for her loser loverboy
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 05:51 PM
4

I wore mine 27 years. She left for AP and it took about 2.5 years for indentation to go away. I don’t think I’ll ever put another band on.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 02:28 AM
7

It takes years.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 01:20 AM
20

This is what happens. People don’t make their relationship a priority and drift apart. I would try everything I could to make it work. Divorce is not a happy ending for anyone if they are being truthful.
/r/Divorce_Men06/07/24 11:33 PM
2

Same here. Married 27 years in a very conservative Christian family. When she left for her AP and her multiple other affairs were discovered it became MY fault. They dropped me. Hypocrisy at its finest. They even tried to convince my children that I’d had an affair. Lies to make their little girl look better. Now I want nothing to do with them, I don’t want people like that in my life.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 12:40 PM
2

I did. Wife left and drained me after 27 years for her AP. I was about 50 so I moved in and help my elderly parents. It’s been pretty good and after 3 years I’m loaded.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 10:07 PM
12

Don’t be mad at God. It was her, and God is the one giving you your life back brother. Trust me. Married to a “Christian wife” 27 years. She had multiple affairs. I found out by the grace of God.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 12:41 PM
2

I did exactly the same as you. Gave her the house and kept 100% of my pension.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 06:17 PM
12

She told me she didn’t like sex, but come to find out she loved it with plenty of other dudes.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 11:15 PM
9

It’s surreal. The person I thought she was for 27 years was not who she actually is.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 04:42 PM
3

Podcasts, working until I absolutely exhausted myself.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 04:59 PM
1

3 children. Yeah, messed up.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 12:43 PM
3

After she left I found out about more affairs. What was even real over all those years. I lost my past and my memories.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 12:22 PM
2

Yeah it’s lonely sometimes. I miss her sometimes, well who I thought she was. It’s a hard pill to swallow.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 02:31 AM
6

Yup. Been there brother. For 27 years. Worked 60 plus hours a week for years, gave her everything, then she leaves for her deadbeat loverboy.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 12:48 AM
3

I went to Las Vegas for 2.5 weeks after my wife of 27 years cheated and left me. I didn’t gamble or drink, I just walked, lost track of time and disappeared in the crowds. It was helpful. However, my recommendation would be South Dakota, Wyoming and Montana. It’s beautiful, and will give you time and space to reflect. Peace be with you, brother.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 04:09 AM
4

Nothing you can do. Seriously. Just forget it and move on. I’m telling you this to save you a lot of misery down the road.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 08:33 PM
1

Yep. My situation too. Of course, she cheated and ruined a 27 year marriage and family so yeah, I get angry still.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/24 06:25 PM
4

After discovering her multiple affairs over our 27 year marriage and her eventual departure for the latest AP and destruction of our family, I struggle mightily with anger and hate. Therapy has really helped me see her for who she is. The anger and hate will kill you. I just accept she’s cheating garbage I used to know. I still have to see her on occasion but I’ll never speak to her again.
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/24 07:59 PM
13

I have not and probably will never forgive her for what she done to me and our kids, but I did have to let go of the anger because I believe it was going to kill me. I just accept she’s a cheating homewrecking piece of garbage and do my best to forget she ever existed.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 04:16 PM
9

If she refuses, give her what she wants. Sorry brother I know exactly what you’re going through. Mine left after 27 years and the multiple affairs I discovered. I fell into a deep depression and struggled for 3 years to dig out.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 01:09 AM
16

Got to give it about 3-5 years to let the memories fade.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/24 05:09 PM
5

3 brand new vehicles in 2 years. Expensive watches. Finally chilled out on the spending spree.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 01:23 PM
6

I wasn’t as lucky. 27 years. Loved her more than anything. Found out she’d had multiple affairs. Has taken 3 years worth of therapy to climb out of the pit.
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/24 03:37 AM
3

4 months is nothing. It takes years. At least 2-5 in most cases. However, some guys are luckier. I’m sure it depends on length of marriage and if the discovery was a surprise.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 08:08 PM
8

Exactly the same. She had multiple affairs and I am the “abusive monster.”
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 05:15 PM
5

Her cell phone. Someone told me to do some checking. I didn’t believe them, but a week later she got anew phone and plan and I checked her old phone and FB messenger was still active. It crushed my soul.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 08:20 PM
6

After discovering multiple affairs she had over our 27 year marriage
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 05:05 PM
3

I begged my ex for a long time to try to save our 27 year marriage after discovering her affairs. She wasn’t interested and wanted to be friends. I haven’t seen her or talked to her in a year and hope I never do again. Even though we have children everything is separate. I refuse to attend anything with her and her loverboy.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/24 10:50 PM
7

After a long long marriage and being over 50. My ex cheated and left. I don’t trust anymore either. Wish I could, I try, but I can’t.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 08:13 PM
8

Ditto. But I can’t stand the thoughts of loverboy being around my kids.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 06:05 PM
13

You wanna kill yourself over someone like her??? Who could care less?? So she wins??? I don’t think so.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 02:46 PM
7

I will never accept her AP loverboy piece of garbage as anything to my children. Period. He is to never be anywhere around me either.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 06:02 AM
2

There is no why. Bad things happen. God have them free will. Truth is they gave in to the devil. Unfortunately, sin affects everyone around us.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 02:55 AM
4

That’s one thing I would want to know for sure. Plus, could you even touch her after she’s been with another man? Married to him???
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 08:33 PM
6

Big question…. Did she cheat on you with him or someone else?
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 07:57 PM
4

Cut him a break. His wife cheated and his marriage is over. If his desk and chair are important to him then so be it. We all lost a part of ourselves. It’s a pain like no other. I understand brother.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 03:43 AM
2

True.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/23 07:10 PM
9

Yep. Mine too. And had multiple affairs.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/23 07:10 PM
5

Same, but 27 years. You loved her and took your vows seriously. She’s something else now. Get some therapy and heal yourself. It will take time, lots of time.
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/23 05:43 PM
3

Yeah, but it’s a miserable road to walk.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:54 AM
8

I do too. About 2.5 years for me. I was married 27 years when I caught her affairs. She has been a monster ever since. I loathe her and love her, or at least who I thought she was. But that’s it..she never was who I thought. She’s a despicable lowlife cheater who has manipulated my children and made my life miserable. I never want to see her again. If we ever, and we won’t, got back together it would last about 2.5 seconds.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/23 02:39 PM
24

Space, time, breaks= cheating. Heard all this before
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/23 02:14 AM
11

Marriage #1 lasted 27 years before she left for her lowlife loser boyfriend. Marriage #2 I wasn’t thinking clear. Don’t do it again. You’re begging for problems.
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/23 10:33 PM
1

Get a good mean lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/23 09:23 PM
1

It’s real. Little did I know she was turning my kids against me while we were “together “ so when she left for loverboy they 100% blame me.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/23 12:19 AM
1

Wow!!! You’re story echoes mine except 27 years. I thought she was depressed but she was having multiple affairs. She was also systematically manipulating my kids and now that she left for her lover it’s all my fault!!????!?!?
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/23 07:15 PM
2

Mine knew the loverboy before I even knew we were getting a divorce
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/23 02:02 PM
3

Cash my friend
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/23 01:23 AM
7

Same shoes. It takes a whole lot of time.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/23 06:02 PM
3

Seriously, once you’ve had a relationship you don’t need another one. You can become the best man alone, living a life most only dream of. Embrace it. Freedom and life and peace.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/23 05:34 PM
10

Trust me you do not need to start dating and get emotions and tied up in another relationship. Take time to heal and focus on yourself. It actually takes more like 3 years. Listen to wisdom or find out the hard way.🤷🏻‍♂️
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/23 05:24 PM
20

Facebook is where my now ex wife found her loverboy. Yes she never put her phone down. Social media is from Satan himself.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/23 04:26 PM
10

I wouldn’t touch or even look at my ex once she had cheated. It’s vile and disgusting 🤮
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/23 11:09 PM
6

Nope 10000000 times no.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/23 11:07 PM
1

Once she left for current AP, people started telling me about other affairs. I confronted her after our divorce and she admitted to one after I dragged it out of her. I am positive there were others. I mean, she is a cheating liar.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/23 01:40 PM
2

I’ve been divorced about 3 years. Married 27. She left for AP, and after she left I found out she’d had multiple affairs. It was soul crushing.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/23 12:17 AM
2

How long were you married, friend?
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/23 07:06 PM
3

Get outta your heart and in your head.
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/23 12:52 PM
3

Yep.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/23 02:08 AM
3

I didn’t hug her needless to say.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/23 02:06 AM
40

Besides every single thing you mentioned, when I caught her in her affair and she made clear she was leaving she tried to give me a hug and said, “I still hug my friends.” We were married 27freaking years!!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/23 05:56 AM
4

She was tasting something alright…
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 09:08 PM
4

Me too. For 27 years
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 03:12 PM
29

Well she was screwing other dudes. But I’m not sure that was a symptom of Covid
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 12:44 PM
6

I understand exactly your convictions as a Christian concerning divorce and remarriage. It’s a tough situation. I’m 51 and my wife left after 27 years but she was cheating. I found someone else, but it’s not the same. Now I’m stuck. DM me if you need a friend.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 06:50 PM
5

Her cheating and couldn’t wrap my mind around the loss of a 27 year marriage. The pain and destruction of a family.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/23 01:56 PM
3

This is exactly my situation. I try and try to move forward but she uses the kids as weapons to make me miserable. I don’t get it. She cheated, she left, she wants me to leave her alone(which I do), yet she constantly keeps it stirred up. I’m like you, I found out about multiple affairs.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 01:09 PM
1

Maybe what you mean is when a wife cheats with a lowlife loser(even if they’re a billionaire) it’s more possible just because they are pure garbage. Like almost every guy here, I absolutely abhor her trash AP around my kids.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 12:19 PM
5

Brother she is your enemy. Get out of your heart and in your head. This is a fight for your life, your future.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 02:20 AM
1

Lol!!! Apparently not small enough!
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/23 12:28 PM
5

My now ex of 27 years had psoriatic arthritis and took these injections. Of course she had multiple affairs and left for last AP. Was it the meds?? Doubt it, I think she was just a liar and the county bicycle.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/23 03:03 PM
1

Lol! I don’t think she needs a 1k per month prescription to loose weight. If she had an autoimmune arthritis then sure, but weight loss???
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/23 02:55 PM
16

He’s a loser and she is trash. Everyone knows it. It may take 10 years but her time will come. Focus on kids and career and get some therapy. It really helps keep you from doing something crazy.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/23 02:05 AM
4

Sorry brother. It’s been about 2.5 years since she left our 27 year marriage. I truly think she lied too me the whole time. I’m not sure how many affairs she had or when she started. But as soon as I found out she dropped the mask and even though we divorced she has ruthlessly came after me ever since using the kids and child support. I don’t understand, she doesn’t want me, but she wants to destroy me.
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 12:01 AM
5

It’s surreal. Did I ever know her? I sure don’t now. She cheated and left and has been hell bent on destroying me ever since. I loved her beyond anything. Why? For what reason? What is she gaining? I guess I’ll never understand.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/23 09:36 PM
6

I’m with you. 51 years old married for over a quarter century. She just an off for AP. We had it all and it was gone in literally a second. Wow.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/23 09:23 PM
3

You may I have hit the mail on the head. I have zero trust, I’m jaded. 27 years married to a cheating, lying, manipulative “wife” will do that to you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/23 12:46 PM
4

Lol! Nah, sex just isn’t all it’s cracked up to be at least for me nowadays.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/23 04:35 AM
10

Me too. In my mind, it sounds good. After it’s over I’m always like I should have just ate a bologna sandwich.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/23 04:19 AM
4

Ps….strike while she’s in the affair fog. She will be much more negotiable while she has loverboy on her mind.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 11:27 PM
2

Try to buy her out with something else like the house.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 10:33 PM
17

When they cheat or when they aren’t “happy” anymore watch out. You won’t be able to believe or fathom who they become. 27 years married and apparently I never knew her.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 02:39 PM
15

Sorry brother. I know. I’ve lived it. There’s a good chance your daughter has met him already a good while back. It’s so painful on top of everything, but I know from experience there isn’t one thing you can do about it. Ps…please get yourself ready from the alienation from your daughter at your ex’s doing.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 01:55 AM
2

This is my cheating ex wife. A pure monstrous piece of garbage
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 12:26 PM
5

I’m with you. Almost 3 decades. After she left for AP she turned into an unrecognizable monster
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 02:40 AM
17

I love that. I too made an idol of my wife of 27 years. She left for her AP. Do not worship idols. They have mouths but can’t breath eyes but can’t see and ears but can’t hear
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/23 09:52 PM
6

Mine actively alienated my children from me after I discovered her affair and she left for her AP. So I don’t even have the chance to see my kids much. And I certainly don’t want to see her. Ever.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/23 12:45 AM
13

I get it brother. It takes a long long time.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 02:52 PM
4

The truth is all we have. People can believe it or not. Those who don’t are no longer your friends.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 12:53 PM
22

You say anything to a cheater woman and off with your head.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 05:22 PM
3

Lol well I wouldn’t go that far. I absolutely adored her for our 27 year marriage. The damage it has mentally to me and my children has been devastating. It has taken me almost 3 years of therapy to get my head back together.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 07:17 PM
5

I thought this also and sometimes still do. I kinda live in the moment and don’t think about the future too much. I just let it come as it happens. I can’t control the future, but I know everyday has its own challenges and I try to make each thing a learning experience instead of an emotional experience. I guess I’ve kinda become like a Vulcan, and don’t live emotionally any longer. I’m not sure this helps, but knowing I don’t control anything except my own emotions has brought me much peace.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 03:49 PM
3

I’m sorry brother. It’s an excruciating process.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 03:38 PM
4

I was the primary. In my case the ex wife was having an affair and in the fog so hard she gave up everything. All I paid is child support on youngest. I gave her the home, contents, vehicle which she sold it all. I kept 100% of my pensions. She has nothing now and I’m financially very well off.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 03:38 PM
18

I’m 51. Was married 27 years. I’ve really focused on finding out who I am. Hobbies are fine and dating is ok, but I’m talking about really taking a hard introspection of myself. I enjoy being alone and I like to delve into the psychology of the mind and kinda figuring out the philosophy of life. Again, I have found I enjoy being alone. I think the key is being comfortable with yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 03:16 PM
1

You need to call the judges office specifically. Explain your situation. You may get out this time, but maybe not the next time.
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/23 05:12 PM
6

Brother after the initial cost of my divorce my income and bank account has been straight up↗️⬆️
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 05:40 PM
2

March 22??
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 05:27 PM
2

Ps… it was my ex wife of 27 years that moved in with my kids with the trash
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 04:10 PM
2

That’s what I wish. 27 years is hard to forget and it’s hard to fathom she was never who I thought. She was in reality a serial cheater and I was oblivious to the signs. PTSD…definitely. It’s been 28 months since she left for her AP and I think about it everyday. How could she do this to me and our kids? But that’s victim mentality. I can’t fix it or do anything about it. All I can do is be content with my life now and keep moving forward. Don’t wanna waste what time I have left.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 01:55 PM
21

Because deep down they are trash that’s lower than dirt. It’s who they really are. I speak from experience.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 01:43 AM
10

You need too get a lawyer who will fight tooth and nail. Basically the house should be sold and split. You shouldn’t have to pay for her. Child support… yes. Her a home.. no. Assets at worst should be split.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 03:40 PM
3

Bad thing for me is after my ex left our 27 year marriage for her loser alcoholic meth teethed AP and we divorced, I found out SHE was the serial cheater having multiple affairs behind my back for years. Oh well, she’s his problem now.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/23 05:47 PM
6

Thanks man. I’m about 2.5 years out of a 27 year marriage to a cheater. Been tough, but I’m getting a whole lot better.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/23 02:45 PM
5

Exactly. Me too brother.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 09:11 PM
4

I have had absolutely zero communication with my cheating ex for months. 2 kids are adults and the youngest is 16 so I don’t need to talk to her at all. Plus, I loathe her.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 09:10 PM
2

Any time you need to talk there are thousands of us here willing to listen.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/23 06:37 PM
5

Wish I’d known she was cheating years earlier. Wasted too many years.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/23 07:44 PM
8

She’s 100% cheating. Sorry. Seen it too many times and have experienced it. 27 years married to my ex wife.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/23 07:43 PM
5

Just fighting to hold it together brother. That’s all. 27 years and she left for a friend. Then I find out about others. I guess I was the only one who didn’t know. Didn’t see it. I loved her too much and ignored I suppose all the signs. And she alienated my children on top of it all. Felt like I lost everything. Like a lot of guys here. Then I just let the mistakes pile on. I just struggled to breath. I’m better now, but my trust is shattered and I have a hard time finding joy and peace. Again,…
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/23 10:56 PM
10

Discovered finally that I need no woman to achieve my mission. I’m a warrior of one.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/23 09:14 PM
1

27 years with a serial cheater for me. However, I had no clue. When she left for last AP 2.5 years ago I was destroyed. I’m better, but still a very long ways to go.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/23 08:15 AM
11

My now ex of 27 years was pretty much useless. I did everything and worked myself almost to death about 65 hours a week while she did nothing and our house was an absolute mess. She also had an undiagnosed “disability” and I had her to every doctor in the state. Well I finally ended up in the hospital with acute pancreatitis for 6 days. High blood pressure and diabetes and on antidepressants. Guess what? She was cheating behind my back. At least 2 affairs I found out about and finally left me fo…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/23 07:58 AM
3

100%. I too learned the hard way. Please listen!
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/23 07:06 PM
1

Well since she screwed every dude in the county behind my back, I’d say the divorce was 100% my fault.
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/23 12:39 AM
6

Man I was there also. About laid down in front of a Peterbilt. I just didn’t care anymore. However, for the first time I’ve learned to live in the moment. I don’t worry about money anymore either because I have plenty now she’s not spending every dime I could make. It takes a long time to get better, 2.5 years for me and counting. I still get depressed sometimes and still ruminate. 27 years is a lot to get over and to find out she cheated for many of those. Hopefully by 5 years my mind will be b…
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/23 03:39 AM
3

Right on spot 21! Lol! I had 27 and loved her completely before she fell in love with a loser and took me to the cleaners and manipulated my kids!!!! Every man needs to learn this☝️
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/23 11:10 PM
3

Oh yeah, the old buddy. Mine left for my childhood friend. Needless to say, even though he may have done me a favor, we are not friends. And I will not forget nor forgive.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/23 03:50 AM
1

Get lawyer. If you’re not a child molesting convict who hates his kids you should get 50/50 no problem. Seriously, mine tried the same thing. I fought tooth and nail and got my 50/50 from the cheating monster. Stay strong brother. Be ready for her to do her best to alienate the kids. It’s hard, but this is gonna take every ounce of strength you can muster.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/23 03:47 AM
30

She cheated. I loathe her. She’s a monster.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 03:43 PM
4

I call BS on “emotional affairs”. If they meet up and they are close enough for an emotional affair then I’ll put 99 to 1 odds it’s physical.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 01:18 PM
6

I don’t know if any pain can top the pain of a adulterous spouse who leaves. One you loved so much, to find out they were something else. It really messes you up for a lifetime.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/23 04:29 PM
16

I did. I do not recommend it.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/23 01:23 PM
7

Lol!!! You can’t trust her. You better listen to everyone here and get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 12:24 PM
6

Thanks brother
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/23 04:55 PM
20

Basically she cheats, leaves for a scumbag, takes your kids and gets the reward of taking everything you worked for and half your retirement. This is the American dream???
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/23 02:20 AM
2

Play it smart brother. Gotta use your head. Good lawyers and a good game plan. Then when you go to court you win your case.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/23 03:48 AM
2

Oh yeah, and I’m bipolar too. I forgot. I have so many bad traits. Heck, I’d leave me too. Lol!!!
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/23 01:10 PM
11

I was labeled mentally and emotionally abusive. Therefore, she had multiple affairs and left me for the first AP that would take her. Go figure 🤷🏻‍♂️. The only one abused was me.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/23 01:05 PM
1

Lol! He IS NOT better than me. I look down on no one for socioeconomic reasons but I do look down on trash
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 05:49 PM
1

Yeah I agree. Still need another year or 2. Gotta kinda clean up mistakes I made after Dday.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 04:44 PM
3

It comes and goes still. Still hard. But I know I didn’t do this and I realize I do not regret anything I did. I always tried my best and to do the right thing. I work hard on me everyday. How are you brother?
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 03:29 PM
9

I found after loving her completely for 27 years only to discover multiple affairs and she definitely did not affair up, in fact he’s a meth teethed alcoholic loser, I have zero regrets. I did my best. She’s the one who’s broken. (She just left me broken, but I’m getting better and she is not)
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 12:55 PM
10

Don’t worry about if it’s illegal. Put cash away and do not tell her. I’m sorry, I’m probably jaded, but I will not loose everything I’ve worked for to another woman ever again.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/23 10:04 PM
6

See an attorney asap.
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/23 04:59 PM
1

It’s high time you start hiding and stashing assets as well. This should be the last woman to ever know your full finances. Cash is king brother. Hide it in as vast amounts as you can.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/23 02:28 PM
1

You got the time with the boys. So much more precious than the money. I don’t have cancer, but I understand having to fight to get my kids from my cheating ex wife. Please live each day fully. Do it for you, your sons and us, your brothers. We are behind you!
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 11:47 PM
2

Music. Loud loud music. And time. Eventually it will subside.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 04:49 PM
5

You just need good boundaries in place when you get healthy again so you don’t end up right back here.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 04:55 PM
1

Lol yeah… she shared the love all around. What a W.!
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/23 08:09 PM
1

Scared. That was the reason she gave. I tried to be understanding. What a complete idiot I was.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 12:41 PM
7

Yep, I loved her and I thought it was the right thing to do. She would do the BJ. Come to find out I think she blew every man in the county over the course of our marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 02:03 AM
6

I done it for 27 years. Ps… no sex, I mean zero the first 5 years. But I loved her, I stayed. Guess what? She left me after 27 years for her AP. The epitome of selfish. Destroyed me and our kids.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 12:17 AM
6

After 27 years of marriage and giving myself completely to her, only for her to leave with AP then find out there were others. I consider myself cautiously wise.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/23 03:28 PM
2

Well she committed adultery and wanted to be with loverboy so bad it was over as quick as can be in KY. 27 years marriage down the tubes. But now she realizes she gave up half my pension and she uses the kids every chance she gets to make my life miserable.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 06:38 PM
1

90 days after signing dissolution and that was only because of underage children
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 06:32 PM
7

Won’t get you anywhere unless he’s a convicted child molester or something
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 03:38 PM
6

Heck brother my ex left me after a 27 year marriage and 3 kids. It was all gone in 1 day, 1 day and 27 years wiped away for a piece of garbage loverboy. Oh well, 2 years later it still hurts but I’m better for it.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 01:37 PM
1

5 miles. 50/50.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 12:34 AM
3

It happens and is quite normal. I listened to a lot of music and podcasts to fall asleep too. Even after a couple of years though I still wake up and don’t know where I am for a couple of seconds.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 06:25 PM
3

There is no understanding it, so you need to stop trying and just accept this is reality. Acceptance leads to peace. I too went into a severe state of depression for about 2 years when my wife left for her AP. But now I regret nothing I did. I wasn’t perfect but I always tried my very best and gave her all of me. She was the one who chose to throw it away. It’s hard, but get some good therapy and give it more time. Again, you will never understand or comprehend. Stop trying, you’re wasting your …
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 06:17 PM
2

Divorced after 27 years of her cheating, lying and manipulation. It was still tough, hardest thing I’ve ever done or been through.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 03:41 AM
10

The court order doesn’t mean crap. I’m in the exact down to the AP situation. I have taken her to court and she gets a little slap and then does whatever she wants. The whole system is ridiculous and rigged for the women. Some women are good and deserve busting the dead beat dads tail, but unfortunately even if she is pure garbage she wins.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 06:30 PM
2

She was a serial cheater over our marriage. However, 3 kids and a family destroyed, I regret she never even gave me a chance. I regret a broken family. But she got what she wanted, I’ll never understand it.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/23 08:19 PM
2

You love her too much and you let her stomp on you, disrespect, cheat, use…etc.. until she finally thinks she’s found someone better (she found a loser) and leaves.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/23 04:04 PM
14

Yep, been there. Manipulation at its finest. And to think I gave in for 30 years while she cheated behind my back. But I caught her and the gig was up. No more Mr. Nice guy. I was repulsed by her.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 09:52 PM
7

She’d already cheated. Forget her. After awhile you’ll see she’s not worth the energy.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 12:13 PM
3

I think you did good. And it’s hilarious watching her cheating rear struggle. Added bonus.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 01:13 PM
3

I get it. My advice would be if you pull the plug, do not get in another relationship. I promise it isn’t worth it.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 11:55 AM
1

Are you just divorcing because she doesn’t want to work?
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 11:31 PM
1

Man I’ve been through some of this. My ex wife was a serial cheater and major manipulator of our children. I left because the last affair was of course with a childhood friend of mine. I couldn’t take anymore. She immediately moved my kids in with him and started work to replace me as their father and make the kids believe I was bipolar. (I’m not, had tests run for my own peace of mind and been in therapy 2 years for trauma and parental alienation). It has been 2 years of pure misery. Maybe I sh…
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 11:03 PM
2

Mine was just my 40 hour salary. I work more and make more but it wasn’t counted in my state.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 01:18 AM
4

I also am on my way to court more than likely. Went once and won putting my kids in therapy. Not had my 50/50 custody in about 2 years. Gonna get it.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 12:23 AM
3

It’s the hardest thing you’ll ever do. And absolutely no one said it has to be amicable. I hate my ex for what she did.
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 10:48 PM
7

It takes a long long time. I’m over 2 years out and I’m still furious.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/23 02:31 AM
0

Be very slow and cautious.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/23 12:41 AM
2

You’re looking at it all wrong. I promise I am 51 and my wife left me for her AP and took everything from me after 27 years and I still pay her every month child support on top of that. It sucks bad. I also considered ending it. BUT… I took responsibility for myself and got into therapy. I walked out debt free and free of her cheating rear end. Now I can do whatever I want, and I do. Small steps every day.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/23 02:12 PM
11

My goodness all these years he was emotionally abusive, no good, hard working, excellent father, loved me and provided piece of trash. My loser loverboy is so much better!
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/23 12:30 AM
2

Can I DM you? I have very similar religious beliefs.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/23 12:54 PM
7

Fist bump brother
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/23 09:06 PM
1

A good male therapist. You may have to try a couple. AND… you aren’t gonna be able to hold it together and act like everything is ok living with her. You are gonna either implode or explode. It will be extremely messy. Get out of your heart and get in your head. She is now your enemy. Trust me on this. I went through it.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 02:14 PM
1

Time definitely moves slow now. I spend most of it alone. I’m not quite the mess I used to be, so I guess time did help with that.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 06:43 PM
29

It’s very hard. My now ex wife left me after 27 years of marriage for her AP. I loved her beyond anything and she was my life. I don’t know how to cure the heartbreak but I’m here to talk if you need too.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/23 04:53 AM
6

Brother this is all the cheating trash ex wives.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/23 04:10 AM
1

Cheaters are morals are in direct conflict
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/23 05:32 PM
2

Trust me they never affair up. He is a loser piece of garbage. Mine was 27 years and left me for an utter lowlife.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/23 01:18 PM
10

Mine was 27 years and ended the same. You DO NOT want her or need her back. Trust me. Get some therapy and get your life back together without her. I know what you’re going through, but you are much much better off.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 03:47 PM
11

Lol… because all women know everything there is to know about everything already.
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/23 10:15 PM
8

My ex was the same exact way. Never cooked, cleaned or anything. Drained our accounts dry constantly. Did not work. Guess what! She was going to the grocery everyday and getting her brains pounded out by her AP while I worked 12 hours a day and 4 on Saturday every week to keep us floating. 27 years of marriage gone like a vapor.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/23 01:14 AM
1

I’m gonna be the bad guy. Divorce is the most horrible thing. You better think long and hard.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 06:51 PM
2

And no comfort to the enemy
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/22 08:37 PM
5

Truth ☝️. Do not be naive and think she won’t.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/22 12:45 AM
1

I’m right there with you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 01:41 PM
6

You gotta cut her off. She wants to be on her own then she has to be on her own. She is destroying you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/22 03:56 AM
4

Brother there is a 99.9 percent chance there is infidelity. I’m sorry. All of our stories are eerily similar. Those of us here have been there and know all the tricks, lies and manipulations.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/22 05:33 PM
1

Gave her mine and hers. Why would I want them? She gave me all our family photos over the 27 years marriage just to hurt me more. She was a manipulative, lying cheater.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/22 04:11 AM
5

Not yet. She’s stubborn. But she basically lives on government assistance and child support with her AP and my kids while I have more money than I know what to do with. I gave her the house, car , everything and she has blew it all. What a loser.
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/22 01:28 AM
4

Well, she was cheating. I told her.. you want a divorce, you got it. So I filed and divorced her on grounds of adultery.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/22 09:56 PM
4

Her cheating over and over. 27 years down the tubes
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/22 08:07 PM
3

I will never be friends with a cheater! Stay strong brother.🦾
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/22 02:13 AM
3

You can’t if your ex hoe has manipulated the children into believing you’re an abusive monster. She’s the monster. Affair after affair over our 27 year marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/22 11:21 PM
2

I knew something was wrong when she didn’t want a 25th anniversary party. She was very odd. Said she didn’t want to be around people. Finally on year 26 I find out she’s been involved in an affair with a childhood friend of mine. She left me for him. After our divorce I find out she’d had other affairs over the course of our marriage. I was absolutely devastated to say the least. I’m sorry brother.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/22 02:46 AM
1

I’ve gone through the exact same thing with my 3 children. I just text them sometimes and try to be patient. It is the most horrible thing.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 03:14 PM
4

Same for me brother. 27 years I enabled her. The only work she ever did come to find out, was on her back.
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/22 12:51 PM
6

She’s having an affair. She’s fell in love. Sorry brother.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/22 12:17 AM
2

Thank you. I will not give up on them. Right now I’m just trying to give some space, but still text even though they don’t answer.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/22 03:51 AM
1

lol I was married to her 27 years and loved her above everything. She turned pure evil somewhere.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/22 03:49 AM
2

My kids are 16 and 17. Too late
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/22 07:06 PM
4

Same deal here. My wife cheated and left me and has convinced my kids I’m terrible. I go months at a time without seeing or being able to speak to them even though I have 50/50 custody. I’m mentally and physically broken
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/22 06:13 PM
2

You summed it up exactly. Worked very hard because she was a stay at home mom apparently with way too much time on her hands. I spent 27 years building a life for us and was almost too the point where we would be financially set. Unbeknownst to me she handled the bills and was spending 5K per month on anything and everything. I tried everything I could to get her back, from giving her all assets (except my pension) to even giving her more child support than required. She’s gone, never looked bac…
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/22 01:17 PM
1

Doesn’t do any good. I’ve been mad, sad and everything in between. I just don’t really care anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/22 01:18 AM
2

Had to buy my retirement pension out. She’s manipulated my kids. They refuse to see me. She was a serial cheater but blamed me and slowly manipulated my kids to believe I caused everything.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/22 08:16 PM
3

I’m in KY. My cheating wife took everything and we have 50/50. I never get to see my kids, but have to follow the court directive to the “T”, while she doesn’t have to do anything. Doesn’t matter where you are, if you’re a male, you’re screwed.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/22 07:07 PM
4

I learned that life goes on.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/22 12:51 AM
11

Very good chance she’s cheating. Get out of your heart and use your brain. You’ll need too. You may not feel so sorry for her when the dust settles.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/22 05:58 PM
12

It is horrid that the wife cheats and leaves and with her takes everything you worked your whole life for AND you pay her alimony and child support to keep her cheating rear end and loverboy up. The system is broken. Men are beaten down until utterly broken.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/22 03:18 AM
9

You’re not alone. My now ex wife of 27 years left me for a childhood friend I grew up with. The anger and bitterness can be consuming. Definitely get into therapy asap, it has really helped me accept her for who she really is. I also discovered she’d had other affairs over our almost 30 year marriage. It’s devastating and you will need help.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/22 07:48 PM
7

I definitely believe this is true. I actually loved her, it was very real for me.
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/22 03:12 PM
30

Mine did this too me after a 27 year marriage. She hooked up with a loser I grew up with. She played the angel so well, depressed, couldn’t work or do anything around the house for years, etc. Well I knew something seemed off since our 25th anniversary but never would have imagined she was cheating. Anyway, long story short, she left me for her boyfriend and then I find out she had other affairs during our marriage. I will tell you I loved her more than anything and worked 65 hours a week for ye…
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/22 01:32 AM
5

Any man messing with a married woman is a lowlife dirtbag
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/22 04:34 PM
8

Lol! Mine too. She left a 27 year marriage, big house, fancy car and being a SAHM for a meth teethed alcoholic loser. I don’t get it. I loved her beyond anything.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/22 01:45 PM
1

Do something for you, or just make sure it’s a regular day like any other and celebrate new anniversaries.
/r/Divorce_Men10/08/22 12:43 PM
1

All the above at different times as I move through the day.
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/22 07:03 PM
3

Married 27 years. Me 22, her 19. She had multiple affairs and left for last AP.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 10:29 PM
5

Spot on my brother. Add “She can cheat all she wants and you will still be the bad guy.”
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/22 08:01 PM
6

My opinion only. Divorce is the most horrible devastating thing that ever happened to me. I would say just start investing in yourself and doing your own thing. She will see how cool you are and may want to get onboard. One last very important thing. Do not cheat, do not destroy this woman. No human deserves that pain.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/22 01:17 PM
14

Gave mine the house and everything I owned and built over the last 30 years just to retain my pension. Still pay 800 a month in CS. Not a lot, but I only got my clothes and a lawn mower. And she’s the one who cheated!!??!?
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/22 02:15 PM
3

That was a good laugh!!
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/22 02:13 AM
3

Mine moved on way before divorce. Multiple affairs. Just had to find the right one to take her sorry tail
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/22 12:21 AM
3

Lol!!! Mom is 69 and Dad is 72. I’m a vietnam era baby
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/22 12:14 AM
6

Moved in with parents. Even at 50. Paid everything off.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/22 01:02 PM
3

Hopefully it will not happen, but unfortunately 9 out of 10 times there is so much pain, anger and resentment that’s the path it takes. Good luck. I wish you far better than what I’ve suffered.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/22 03:52 PM
3

Do not believe her. As bad as you don’t want to believe it, she is the enemy now. I promise.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/22 02:01 PM
3

I love the idea, but have found it doesn’t work. You just end up miserable and driving yourself crazy. But I agree, it’s awful and horrible to live and watch. Women no matter just get by and men have to follow the law to the “T”
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/22 01:35 PM
5

My brother the same thing happened too me. I was furious for a long time. I still hate her and loverboy. But what can you do? It’s not fair. Just say screw it and go do you and be freaking awesome.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/22 01:32 PM
2

My cheating ex wife turned my 3 children against me. Hoping one day they’ll see the truth. It’s excruciating pain.
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/22 02:05 AM
2

Trust me, I’ve thought about it. He Will Not win a fight against pure rage.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/22 10:39 PM
2

They saw it all go down. I left the house, but she was going to continue relationship with AP and asked for divorce. 1.5 years ago. They finally sold my house and they moved in an apartment next to AP. Was I angry and bitter? Absolutely. 27 years of my life was flushed. The AP was a childhood friend of mine. I utterly despise him and her for what they have/are doing. Yes, I’m in therapy but I believe my kids need it also, but she won’t do it.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/22 10:28 PM
2

My question would be whether to file contempt charges because they won’t visit, parental alienation, and force it therapy?
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/22 10:19 PM
3

My ex wife of 27 years cheated multiple times. I have 3 children age 21, 17, 15. They hate my guts and I don’t know what to do. My ex completely changed the narrative. I never cheated and was a good hard working dad. They refuse to see me and talk to me like I’m dirt.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/22 09:34 PM
4

Being on this sub helped me tremendously, plus I see a male therapist weekly. I still haven’t been able to forgive and, like you were, I cannnot even look at her. The anger is consuming. For her and her AP.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/22 06:45 PM
1

Some dumb cheating mom I’m sure. I pay child support to keep mommy and AP’s sorry rear ends up. Ridiculous. It certainly doesn’t go to the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/22 02:44 AM
7

You’re probably screwed. I’ve found the court makes mommy do nothing no matter how much of a piece of trash she is.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/22 01:33 AM
1

You have me and OP mixed up. I hate my ex wife and her loser AP.
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/22 10:27 PM
2

Meth teethed. Don’t know if he still does drugs. But I do know for a fact 3 or 4 years ago he was.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/22 11:37 PM
2

They won’t do anything cause their not abused. It’s just not the way they were raised, but it’s what they live in now. How can I be the terrible one. I’ve never stopped attending church and being a moral man, while she has been disfellowshipped for adultery.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/22 09:59 PM
3

My ex makes me out to be terrible so my kids don’t want to go to church with me or spend any time with me. I turned 50 last week and not a peep from 2 of the kids who are underage and we share custody. She won’t send them to church now and she is shacked up with a meth teethed alcoholic loser. That is their new normal.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/22 09:50 PM
5

My ex wife of 27 years was. She always blamed me for her cheating. Finally she left for last AP and It was the best thing for me cause I couldn’t and wouldn’t leave her. It’s a terrible place to be my friend.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/22 12:15 PM
7

It would if you could stone a cheater or they leave with zero assets and zero custody.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 06:08 PM
7

My ex wife cheated and has been disfellowshipped from church.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 12:39 PM
8

Ohhh…. I have been and am currently in your shoes. My cheating ex wife took everything I owned and has turned my kids against me so she can run around with the new daddy. She’s a complete wh*re, and my anger towards them burns like the fire of 1000 suns. I have to work 2 jobs to pay her so they can play house.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 12:37 PM
1

Hang in there brother.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 01:00 AM
2

Heck yeah. My check up after she left was the best I’d had in years. Mentally I was a mess, but physically my health improved after I lost the 180 pound baggage I was carrying all the time. It’s amazing how you can lose that much weight over the course of the 3 months it took the divorce to finalize. Lol!!!
/r/Divorce_Men04/05/22 06:05 PM
14

Lawyer now. She’s in affair fog. Strike hard and fast. No mercy.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/22 03:01 AM
1

Next time she goes out, throw her stuff in the yard and barricade the door.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/22 02:37 PM
3

Congrats brother!!
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/22 12:32 AM
5

This is absolutely correct. I’m living it myself except my ex wife’s only personality disorder is she is a who**.
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/22 01:06 AM
3

It is the way it goes. Mine was a SAHM also and had multiple affairs and moved in with last AP.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/22 01:26 PM
5

Please!! The courts are biased to me mommy. No recourse my brother. My kids won’t even hardly speak to me.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/22 03:56 PM
3

I have to let them go in a sense. I can’t keep letting them hurt me. I can’t keep on like this.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/22 01:25 AM
2

My kids hardly see or talk too me. I have 50/50, but it’s about 0% with 2 and about 50 with one who told me last night he wants less time with me. Their mom lives with AP and kinda lets them do whatever. I hope someday it will change.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/22 07:07 PM
6

No it’s not. I loved mine even though she was cheating and had before. Love is a funny thing. Thank goodness she left and didn’t give me the chance. You have a trauma bond. It will takes at least a year or two to break. Every day will be hard, but you can do it. I don’t think you’ll have a choice. She’s gonna lie and gaslight you like crazy, but she’s cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/22 01:43 PM
9

My brother she is cheating on you right now and has been for awhile. I saw this in my own wife and many others here have saw the same. Get the evidence you need for your piece of mind, leave her, and start pulling yourself together. It will take time, lots of time. Your instinct is to reply there is no way she is, but she is. I’m sorry and sending you virtual hugs and love from one brother to another.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/22 12:55 PM
3

I would never downvote you. My wife of 27 years had multiple affairs and left for last AP. It’s incredibly hard to deal with and incredibly hard just to live in misery. Try going to church and also getting some antidepressant meds to help get out of the funk.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/22 01:11 PM
7

I’ve seen a lot of men do crappy things but I’ve seen a lot of women take it to a whole other level in absolutely destroying their husband especially if she’s cheating and the husband loves her enough to let her ruin him. Pure evil.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/22 12:57 AM
2

Who really knows? I tried to be a good husband and father, but in the day I wasn’t enough.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/22 04:46 PM
5

Lol!!! It’s a joke
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/22 08:14 PM
7

50/50, but I don’t get it much. She does as she pleases and the courts give me no recourse. It’s a joke.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/22 07:54 PM
3

There may have been problems, but I am sorry, that never justifies cheating and I will not accept blame for her broken vows. The end of story.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/22 12:58 AM
6

No I do not accept that. I have things I could do better, but stepping out and cheating is 0% my fault.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/22 12:02 AM
23

Can I survive being alone? Yes Can I actually ever get past the betrayal? Probably not.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/22 07:16 PM
24

She would never cheat..until she did and did and did.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/22 02:35 AM
3

Do not. I am 50 years old. My wife of 27 years cheated and left. I am starting from scratch, she wiped me out cause I let her, I wanted to keep her. If I can do this at 50 so can you. It does get better. Get out and meet people and give yourself some grace and time.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/22 06:15 PM
5

Nah…she’s gonna win no matter what. You’ll spend a fortune. My ex does everything she can so I don’t get kids. We have 50/50. With one it’s 50/50 cause he wants to see me, the other it’s 100/0 cause mommy has manipulated her.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/22 08:11 PM
1

Absolutely. No matter how awful she is, and if she’s anything like mine she is a most despicable person.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/22 01:35 PM
3

I never get to see my daughters, but my son does visit even though I have 50/50 custody of all my under age children. I could fight but I’d just spend myself out and not gain anything. I just tell them I love them and in time I hope they figure out who was there and who wasn’t.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/22 01:16 PM
8

I grieved horribly and still grieve today some. 27 years was a long time for her to throw away for a POS.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/22 07:29 PM
7

You can avoid him. My ex had an affair and left a 27 year marriage with a friend I grew up with and our kids were friends. Really, he has avoided me for over a year ever since I found out. And that’s a very good thing.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/22 01:52 PM
4

You can’t change or stop what she does. Just know the past is over. You’ll never like he guy really, just stop having anything to do with him. You’re causing yourself pain and agony.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/22 01:39 PM
1

Gotta get past the anger and bitterness. Nothing you can do will change any of it. The past is over. Don’t let this consume and define you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 03:47 AM
5

This is 100% spot on. Reach out to a God fearing faithful man who had been through this and overcame. They will help you. The past is past, leave it there. Nothing you do can or will change that.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 03:45 AM
1

I talked and cried. Talked and talked to people. Read tons of this very sub. I still talk to folks everyday that have helped me. It’s a looong process. It’s the most difficult process. I beat my mind up sometimes every minute to stay in control. I extended love and trust to people and I never blamed God. I stayed in church and became more active: and I put myself out there.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/22 12:55 PM
17

I felt the same way. Everyone would be better off without me. I almost did it. NOT TRUE! For all the pain, I gained a life at 50. I gained a new beautiful wife who loves me completely. Hang on, this will pass!
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/22 12:42 PM
2

Oh no. She is so in love with her piece of trash AP it’s pathetic.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 09:34 PM
2

Oh no. She is so in love with her piece of trash AP it’s pathetic.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 09:30 PM
4

Oh mine too exactly, but now she has to work and pay her own way. She can’t lay in bed all day then get up and screw her lovers while I’m at work.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 09:07 PM
3

Yep, if your bored then work it out. If they cheat, then legally burn them down through the court. Make their life a living hades. But you’re right, you’ve been faithful and she cheats and gets everything you’ve worked so hard for. I absolutely hate a cheater.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 05:47 PM
2

You won’t get any arguments from me on that. We definitely need fault based divorce. A cheater deserves nothing but misery.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 04:09 PM
2

I would qualify that with “cheating” women. Most women are very intelligent, but a cheater just loses their mind.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 01:11 PM
2

I did, but my girls got so mind screwed by their mom, they blame me. So, maybe just let them figure it out.
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/22 08:40 PM
2

But after you get away from her you’ll like work better. Same here hung happened to me. 3 more years to my pension. And I don’t have to give her a dime!!! Win!!!
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/22 05:24 PM
2

Mine still does. Man, I really can’t stand her!
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/22 07:18 PM
2

You got that right. I was married 27 years to a cheater and narc. She pushes me daily and knows exactly how to get me. Her main thing is to weaponize my kids and to do everything she can to replace me with her AP as their new daddy. He’s awesome while I work my butt off to pay child support so they can play house.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/22 03:05 PM
6

It’s ok! You’ll make some mistakes. This is a super hard process, especially if she is a cheater and narcissist. It’s an emotionally draining process.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/22 02:58 PM
2

Agreed
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/22 01:30 AM
3

Oh my how I hate my cheating ex wife wh***, and her POS AP. Not made it to indifference yet cause I have kids with her that she weaponizes against me. But I’m getting closer by the day where I just don’t give a f anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/22 01:28 AM
4

There is no good time for the kids. Mine were 15,16and 21 and it destroyed them when they’re cheating mother left. They ended up mad at the world and super depressed. I couldn’t help them much either cause I fell into a bottomless pit when she left me after 26 years of marriage for another man.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/22 02:24 PM
8

My ex is a serial cheater who kept my last name just to bug me.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/22 11:57 PM
3

You got rid of her for a reason. This is what a cheater says. Remember…she’s a cheater.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/22 01:53 PM
23

More therapists need to stand up and let them know they are a horrible person. But a whole lot of therapists are broken people thinking they can heal other broke people. It’s the proverbial blind leading the blind.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/22 03:48 AM
4

Protect protect protect your assets. It will move from amicable to nasty very quickly.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/22 07:41 PM
6

Also remember most times she’ll leave you for a loser who is not even a third of the man you are. I’ve seen it time and time again, even with my own ex wife. The problem is no man who is worth anything will have her. Watch and see, I’ll be right. You got this OP. My guess is she’s been cheating for awhile. You may not know it yet, but the truth will be exposed.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/22 07:15 PM
5

Married 27 years to my cheating wife. She took everything from me including alienating my children. Fast forward today I married a beautiful amazing woman. She is so good to me. I was blessed. I met her in my darkest time and she stood with me and I’m 1 year out from divorce and very happy. Life is short, when you find joy grab it and don’t let go. If you are a younger man you have time to get there. Be patient, but don’t wait to long.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/22 06:54 PM
2

Reach out anytime
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/22 05:43 PM
2

I know you’re right. It’s horrible. Trust me, seeing my kids mental state is excruciating and getting mommy to see it is impossible in her selfish state. I’m broken and I just laid it at the Lord’s feet. I don’t know what else to do.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/22 02:09 PM
3

What’s your problem? My ex wife does the same thing. It’s exhausting and mentally exasperating. Men get destroyed by these evil women and there is nothing we can do but helplessly watch.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/22 12:25 PM
2

We are here brother.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/22 12:21 PM
3

I wish I had done that. My head was spinning so bad from her betrayal I just gave her the house and everything and left. 27 years of marriage down the tubes. I started again from square one.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/22 09:00 PM
4

Said you just work all the time….she lived in a big house, drove a fancy car and wouldn’t work. Then left me for a meth teethed alcoholic loser to live in an apartment.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/22 08:17 PM
4

Yes sir. My wife had me convinced I was bi-polar also. Went to dr and of course I’m not. I guess when you’re screwing other guys your husband is just automatically bi-polar cause he doesn’t support it.
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/22 04:53 PM
4

Trust me on this also, amicable will not last long. She will eat at you until those kids are grown and do anything and everything she can to keep you tore up emotionally and manipulate you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/22 01:42 AM
16

She has a new man. 100%. Sorry my brother, so sorry this is happening to you. It’s utterly devastating. Move immediately while she’s in the fog.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/22 11:05 PM
2

My friend my wife was a narcissistic cheater. 27 years of my life wasted. I get it. Divorce was still terrible though.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/22 03:19 AM
0

Emotions run very high. Usually for a long time. Divorce is messy, ALL divorce. If there is no infidelity my advice would be to do everything to save the marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/22 03:00 AM
9

And it will not be amicable.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/22 01:35 AM
2

Nope. Divorce. My ex said all the same things. It’s total BS, they believe their own lies.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/22 07:48 PM
1

Yes Fewdo you do. It’s very very hard. I know.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/22 09:33 PM
1

Mine too, but they will come back one day. Please have faith it will happen brother. I have been to the depths, I wasn’t hospitalized for depression, but my health suffered tremendously and I was hospitalized for the effects. It is one day at a time for me, sometimes one hour and sometimes one minute. But I remain and I constantly buffer my mind and thoughts. How can someone you loved so much do this too you? I wish I had the answer for you, but even though I struggle with the same question dail…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/22 09:08 PM
4

My brother you are not alone. It breaks you and the only person that can pick you back up is you. Your kids will come back and you need to be there when they do. It may be 6 months or 6 years but you need to be there.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/22 08:27 PM
3

The pain is so intense but I do know it lessens the longer out I am from Dday. So I do find hope in your post, but I’m not sure I’ll fully recover. I hope! I am much better about 1 year from that fateful day.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/22 05:52 PM
4

This is me. I do the best I can and see the kids when they want to see me even though I have 50/50 custody. I know they are going through hell just as I am. It’s so very hard. I can’t communicate with my ex at all. After I discovered her cheating she changed into someone I don’t even recognize anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/22 05:27 PM
3

I’d have to go back to court. Just not worth it anymore. When we divorced I was too distraught and a mess to know what I was doing. I couldn’t think straight. I was just reeling.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/22 09:09 AM
5

Mine gave me all of the family pictures and pictures of just us. She kept all of the childrens pictures and refuses to give any too me. My goodness I hate her cheating pathetic rear end.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/22 01:38 AM
2

Mine takes every opportunity to destroy my reputation and relationship with my kids. Why? She’s a liar and cheater who blew up our family to satisfy herself. I ignore all this. Trust me, everyone and I mean everyone knows exactly who the bad actor is. She has to make herself look righteous but she’s not nor will she ever be. I may have lost it all, but in the end she will. It’s actually pretty pathetic and sad.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/22 11:07 PM
3

You better get it in the final. I’ll tell you things have a tendency to turn on a dime.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/22 01:29 AM
3

I give her child support and nothing more. Mine tries this. If the kids need something they can come directly to me and I will decide.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/22 07:40 PM
1

She’s a monster. I asked how could someone I loved so much take everything from me.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/22 05:14 PM
1

I have 50/50 but they are teenagers and their mother does me to them like I’m horrible. So maybe once a month for a couple of hours is it. My oldest is married so I see her on occasion when she can schedule her old dad in.😢
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/22 01:47 PM
0

No fault state. Plus I was in beg mode.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/22 08:05 AM
21

I make a significant amount of money, she was a SAHM who decided to have multiple affairs. Now she lives in an apartment beside AP. She took 100% of assets in divorce. Now she squandered it all and lives on $800 a month child support. Still no job. She is so jealous that I recovered and now have much more money than any point in our 27 year marriage. Sorry, but I will not give her a penny more. She made her choice and gave up Everything destroyed our family. She will now live in poverty unless s…
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/22 12:15 AM
4

Bought a brand new Ram truck. Solid black.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/22 01:26 AM
1

Trust me, she’ll blow through it. Mine did. Now she has no job and lives just on child support but won’t let me see my kids. I’m signing a warrant this week on her if she don’t comply with court ordered custody.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/22 09:04 PM
3

Or want more money cause she’s backed herself into a financial corner. With mine it’s all about the money. More, more more.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/22 07:31 PM
9

When they say they need time and space they generally already have moved on to a new relationship. I’m sorry my friend. Truly very sorry. This is what my wife said too. She did. Now she’s gone.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/22 03:00 PM
2

Something is up if she told you to go cheat!?!
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/22 12:03 AM
1

She needs help.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/22 11:44 PM
3

My cheater ex took mine too. I feel you my friend. Virtual hug.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/22 01:37 AM
1

“How’s it gonna be” Third Eye Blind, “Hate Me” Blue October…lots of emo bands. I was super depressed.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/22 01:36 AM
5

It suck’s major. But you can do nothing about it. Nothing. Be the best dad you can. Heal yourself first, then help the kids. In time they’ll see for themselves just how big of a wh**e piece of crap mommy and her pathetic boyfriend is.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/22 11:27 PM
3

I totally agree. Thanks to all my brothers in this group. You guys have helped me beyond measure and I love you all even though we are complete strangers. We are a true band of brothers.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/22 02:16 PM
2

Hmm. No infidelity or the other things mean I would try very hard to work it out.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/22 11:54 PM
1

Depends on the situation. What’s the problem? Infidelity? Abuse? Drugs/alcohol? Something is not right if you want out so bad and a child is in the equation. I mean it’s bad enough you say you’re willing to risk it all. And maybe it is.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/22 11:42 PM
6

Yeah. Leaving is the hardest thing I ever did. It would have been easier to just take it and not have to go through the pain, but no matter it wouldn’t have worked. She’s gone and I have to keep telling myself that, there’s no going back. I’m drained.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/22 06:32 PM
6

You too my brother. We better take care of each other cause it’s all we have. They refuse to see the carnage they have caused. Self absorbed *ishes.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/22 05:55 PM
28

Wow. Mine to the T. Only thing is she only moved across town right in an apartment next to AP. She has the kids and they are more comfortable with their mom and really like AP. He’s a cool dude who gets child support and I’m a bore who has to work to provide chid support. I’ve moved on but my goodness it’s hard. She still won’t work and soon will run through all the assets I gave her. I guess she’ll try to live on 800 a month. She’s a monster, but she’s smart and has really screwed my head up.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/22 03:19 PM
1

I can’t argue with that my friend. I just don’t want to stay in this cycle. I’ve watched my friends go through this and 6-7 years later not recovered. I don’t want to be like that. I’ve fought really hard to move on and find a life of joy for myself. So I fight like crazy keeping my mind in check.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/22 02:39 PM
1

You have too fight it all the time. My mind wants to wonder at times so I have to fight like crazy to not fall back into the abyss. My life is good, I have someone who loves me more than imaginable and more than I deserve so I focus on her and the good now. But still have to keep a constant check on my mind.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/22 02:13 PM
4

Good one !Definitely what a lot of people think..lol! But seriously pathetic for those who look at it that way my friend.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/22 07:00 PM
37

What is wrong with you? You would renew your vows and then send her divorce papers?
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/22 04:22 PM
17

Because your wife is a narcissist and you’re stuck in a trauma cycle. Been there brother and it sux.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/22 04:38 AM
2

No use. I know. Just suck it up, be the best you can and in time they’ll see who they’re mommy really is. May take several months to years so you’re gonna have to be patient for the long haul.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/22 10:35 PM
1

My friend my ex portrayed me as a workaholic. In reality her lifestyle kept me working 65 hours a week. Now she is trying to get disability and government assistance so she don’t have to work. It kills me to see my kids in this environment, but I know someday they’ll say “why is dad doing so good? I think I’ll go to him.”
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/21 09:10 PM
1

It will definitely get worse. She is living in a reality that she completely fabricated to the point she believes it. It’s horrible. Best thing is too move on and ignore her. You will probably have to make concessions on the kids and I’m telling you, there is no use fighting it. It will cost a fortune and you will get nowhere.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/21 04:41 PM
0

Yep the hate is intense and burning. Especially if she weaponizes your children like mine has and moved them in with her AP. Over time you really just accept that she’s a worthless piece of trash and then you can move on and even find love again if you choose too. You will learn more over the course of this year than you have your whole life. You’ll find out that you were tricked and deceived and a little gullible, who your real friends are and you’ll learn that the things you used to think were…
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/21 06:20 AM
4

Dude stop this. She’s the cheating trash. Good riddance, the guy done you a favor. If she’s gonna cheat then she ain’t worth having. Plus, who wants a wife that other guys have used.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/21 02:48 PM
8

So true. I was an emotional wreck, but I set her tail on fire financially. She was to “in love” to see anything beyond Mr. Wonderful and his magic stick.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/21 06:32 AM
6

She’s a psychopath. Ignore!!!
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/21 03:00 PM
3

After 26 years of marriage. She lost her mind🤷🏻‍♂️
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/21 10:36 PM
13

They get desperate. The first few months after my ex left for her AP everything was great. He was Mr. Wonderful. Now she sees he’s never gonna take care of her and she’s spent herself out, she’s playing the old I could live you again card. Lol. Hang in there, enjoy the show.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/21 03:55 PM
3

Golden my brother. I’ll take this advice.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/21 05:03 AM
7

For sure, sometimes it is just to detrimental to your health to be anywhere near them. Make your memories separately, I think I would be afraid of myself and definitely for myself if I had to be around her and her AP, Mr. Wonderful.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 05:45 AM
0

I worked 2 jobs for mine also for most all of our marriage. She left me, so coming from that perspective, she almost destroyed me mentally and physically and my family is now in shambles. But of course she moved with her AP so that is different than your situation.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/21 07:24 PM
-5

Man don’t leave her. Sounds like she needs you. Remember your vows. I may get tons of crap for this but in a marriage you put each other first. Go get some counseling. If you go out and screw around that’s on you my friend. Please don’t destroy 25 years. I promise I know.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/21 05:41 PM
8

My brother. This is me 100%. Now that she knows there is no way I’d help or take her cheating adulteress butt back, she weaponizes the kids against me. She has created her own narrative and is so mind controlling of my kids. Her AP is Mr. Wonderful and I’m a piece of crap.
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/21 10:25 PM
7

Absolutely.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/21 07:16 PM
22

My was like this and come to find out she had multiple affairs over the course of our 27 year marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/21 02:55 AM
3

Who cares. Leave her tail and divorce her ASAP!
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/21 04:47 AM
1

Yes sir. I know what you’re saying.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/21 06:59 PM
5

Excruciating pain finding out after her multiple affairs during our 27 year marriage. She was a stay at home mom who spent about 5k a month. I loved her with my all but after a few months saw how she drained me of everything. I picked myself up, met a great lady and plan to marry again first of the year. She loves me like I’ve never experienced or like I never knew possible. And yes I have more money now than I ever have in my entire 50 years of life.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/21 04:14 AM
4

Valid points
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/21 08:19 PM
2

Wow! Amazing. So true.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/21 07:32 AM
13

I found that if they say they want space and time it’s pretty much a guarantee they are having or had an affair and need to decide whether they want to string you along and for how long.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/21 08:18 PM
1

Mine didn’t work or clean. But she did manage to carry on at least 2 affairs and left me for the current loverboy.
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/21 08:17 PM
6

Amen!!! Been there, still there!! Even turned my kids! Despise her, she is your enemy!
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/21 05:18 AM
8

Oh my goodness this is a carbon copy of my ex when I caught her affair. I’m a monster??? I only loved her unconditionally and she cheated then come to find out it wasn’t even her first affair over the course of our 27 year marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/21 05:15 AM
1

Forget her and you find a great lady to date
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/21 10:54 PM
1

Maybe. All I know is she’s went freaking crazy
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/21 08:22 PM
4

Never be nice to a cheating piece of trash.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/21 01:40 PM
10

Amen my brother. I’ve been through all of this with my cheating ex-wife. She turned into a narcissistic psychopath.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/21 01:38 PM
4

I am definitely speaking from experience. My wife of 27 years did the same thing. It took about 2 months and I found out she was screwing another man. I was stunned and devastated. But I divorced her and after hitting the bottom of the pit, finally picked myself up and moved on. I found a wonderful woman and she had a meth teeth loser. She’s a piece of trash adulteress idiot.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/21 05:12 AM
19

Dude, she’s cheating. There’s another man. Trust me, you don’t want to believe it but there is. Classic behavior she is exhibiting. She can’t be with you because she would be cheating on her new man.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/21 02:06 PM
4

27 years here. She cheated, she’s so happy. I feel your pain. You have to accept the past(it’s impossible to forget it). She moved on without you and does not care. You are left with the pieces. Pick up what you can and leave the rest alone. Only you can pick yourself up because no one else really cares, they have their own lives and problems. Get mad, remember how bad she screwed you over, then move to “I could care less about her.” Then find a great lady and find joy. It’s out there, just have…
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/21 04:12 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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