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Bazza90 Archive

View 0 posts and 43 comments by Bazza90 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

You've grown up in a subculture that has insulated you from real life. You are now being exposed to real life in a very visceral way, which is jarring. This is very similar to Neo waking up in the Matrix and asking why his eyes hurt. Neo tells him that it is because he has never used them before. You are here, it will get better from here and you will have the opportunity to live a life you never thought possible. Not in that community though, you are a pariah and will never be fully accepted ag…
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/26 05:16 AM
2

Wives have turned on their husbands en masse. Nothing but crickets from God.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/26 12:35 AM
14

The weight is part of the 'for better or worse' part of marriage. You will have to decide if you love her for her or what she offers you. I did experience something similar when I was married with my wife going from looking like a model to pretty similar to your link. I look back on those initial feelings I had with shame now, because once I confronted that part of me that was resentful of the weight gain, I realised how shallow I had been. Then I saw her as attractive again and it never bothere…
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/26 11:59 PM
1

No worries. The business is only an asset if it has goodwill. If the business is you and your repution than this doesn't apply. So a business can be classed as an asset, but a lot of the time for small businesses it is just plant and equipment. Still worth getting some legal advice about, our Community Legal Centres are a good start, and they tend to give more helpful advice the Legal Aid. Try to keep child support private, because if you do that then you can agree on the amount you feel comfort…
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 11:05 PM
8

Aussie here, our system is pretty good. Don't fold. 50/50 time with kids, and sell the house. Our system is very influenced by earning capacity, so the less disparity between your income and hers is important so you not on the end of a 30/70 property split.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 04:49 AM
1

Not sure why this guy is getting down voted, the logic checks out.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/26 07:36 AM
0

What are your motivations for being here? This is a group for men and one of the last bastions where men can express their views. Men are here expressing their concerns and negative experiences and you seem to be dismissing their experiences, why?
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 09:39 AM
5

I lost the typical couple friends and associates, which I anticipated. What I didn't anticipate was my family being so cold and being focused on being fair to 'both of us' while her family rallied around her. It made me realise that my family wasn't really my family and I have since repositioned them in my life. I still do all the same events, but I keep my business to myself for the most part. That part was actually more painful than the loss of the relationship, realising that I was more alone…
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/26 09:27 PM
2

Some of this really resonates. You're doing your bit, but she isn't cutting it. I'm a couple of years down the road and I can tell you that life is easier without dead weight. Your life will improve tremendously after not having her around.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 12:12 AM
10

You have to pretend it's not your birthday and celebrate it on your time with them. Anything that is in the other parties' control is something that they can leverage against you. It is easier to give up all expectations from the other side.
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/25 09:56 PM
19

Although I was married for 15 years, 2 years post-sep I have trouble remembering much of it (almost like memory loss). I get the occasional memory/flashback and they are always reminders of how stressed I was and how unnecessarily difficult family life was. My house is happier, more relaxed, and filled with more love. My relationship with my kids is better. I can see my family without a fight. I get downtime and can relax without guiltrips. I have male friends again (not just the husbands of my …
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/25 09:27 AM
9

They always cite mens inability to sustain the same social relationships that women do, but never take into account how women isolate men in relationships and how normalised this is. Try and go out with mates and see how much resistance you get ( a lot of guys stop going because the arguments aren't worth it).
/r/MensRights28/01/25 09:06 PM
4

Totally get that.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/25 12:38 PM
5

This is a really well thought out post. He defines a way to conceptualise the problem well and gives reasonable advice. But let me ask you this, who in their right mind would want to tie themselves to someone who is like this? If you were single you would never have to deal with any of this drama and your peace would skyrocket. It's up to you man, but all the work that you would do to win her over would carry less reward than if you just did it for yourself and told her to bounce.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/25 09:08 AM
12

Very doable. It's what I've done, I'm two years out and a decade younger. I work, take care of my kids, and when they are gone, I enjoy being solitary. I go camping, fishing, whatever I want, and I feel 100x more peace and tranquillity than when I was married. I will never date again and enjoy not having chaos in my house. I think the hardest part is adjusting to your senses being the barometer for what is right in your life and not another person's tantrums.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/25 08:10 AM
3

This is why I get annoyed with the 'just choose the right woman crowd'. The truth is you never really know if you're marrying a woman who will appreciate your sacrifice to support her and the kids to, or if she will look to instigate a death by a thousand cuts campaign against you. You have the latter, which means you will never be appreciated for your sacrifices and will be punished for compromise. I was in a situation like yours, and I learned that sticking to my guns and checking her when she…
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/24 10:34 PM
13

These particular responses are unhelpful on this sub. There is a clear theme on here, and it does not capture the full gamete of separating/separated men. This sub has a significant percentage of its members who are overfunctioning caregivers with really poor boundaries who partner with cluster b women. This obviously is a recipe for disaster and often takes 10-15 for things to inevitably fall apart. It takes that long because no matter how bad the other parties' behaviour is, these guys are try…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 11:12 PM
4

Divorce made so many things clear to me that had been confusing before. One of which was that my family was incable of being there for me or seeing me as a person worthy to stick up for. I stopped trying harder than they did. I stopped calling. I didn't get angry or confront them, I just re-positioned their place in my life. No longer parents, now just family of origin. For me, though, the realisation that my family was never there for me was worse than the separation.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 09:04 PM
12

Man, this feels close to home, the lying about cycles/birth control and then baby-trapping, the wanting to stay home but not being a productive stay-at-home wife, the laziness and lack of ambition. For me, it never got better, just worse. 15 years later when I separated, I got to be the dad I wanted to be and raise my kids my way in my house. My stress levels are 20% of what they were despite getting a promotion at work, running the household solo, and having pretty unhelpful family. What really…
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 10:21 PM
1

Thanks Harvey.
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 12:23 AM
2

I'd be keen for any of the down voters to share their points of disagreement.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 03:40 AM
2

I'm not closed off to exceptions, I just can't see them around me.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 02:53 AM
8

I have to say that this is my experience as well, and it has caused me a lot of religious doubts. My consistent observation is that women larp as partners only as long as they need to in order to extract value (wedding, kids, guaranteed ongoing financial support etc), and then the true version of them is revealed once they have extracted that value. In biblical terms it is framed in terms of 'not good for man to be alone', 'be equally yoked' etc but my sense is that every man is unequally yoked,…
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 02:11 AM
25

Been there done that. The social isolation. The leaving you without resources. If the genders were reversed, you would have people tell you that you are in a DV relationship and to run. Buddy, that is exactly the scenario you are in. It will only get worse. Leave.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/24 05:40 AM
12

I see this written all the time, but the woman you divorce is the exact same woman you marry. The mask has been removed, that is the only difference. All behaviour prior to that was filtered through getting something or maintaining something. When it's over, she doesn't need either of those things because the government system does them on her behalf. So the mask then falls, and you see the real her.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 08:07 PM
5

Dude, I had something similar. You need to tell her to get a job. A home maker keeps a home, you have an unemployed roomate that doesn't clean up after themselves. The added bonus of her getting a job is if you do pull the divorce card, then she is less financially reliant on you, which is good for everyone involved.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/24 10:36 PM
5

That's Darvo (Deny/deflect, attack, reverse victim and offender). Classic cluster b behaviour.
/r/MensRights10/08/24 04:33 AM
2

There is a set of steps you need to go through in Oz, but by writing to her you have satisfied some of them. You will have to do mediation, and pre-action procedures and then you can go to court. Trust the process, you've got this.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/24 10:10 PM
28

I think women think they do, but when you look at it a bit closer, you actually don't. There was an amazing post the other day on AITA, where a man said he had removed his wife's son from his will after he had discovered that he wasn't biologically his, the son had also known for a few months and was seeing his biological father behind his back. The post got picked up on Facebook as well, so I read through 100s of comments on each platform, and they were universally the same: You're the asshole.…
/r/MensRights25/05/24 12:08 AM
2

You can't negotiate desire. If she wanted to jump your bones, she would. I don't say that to discourage you, but to warn you that it won't go the way you think because the assumptions about how relationships work are slightly off. I hope it works out well.
/r/MensRights06/05/24 05:32 AM
8

Her not communicating with you is the communication. It is an indirect way to say I don't love or respect you, and it's all the communication you need to have. You are also communicating with her through your behaviour that you are willing to tolerate that, which leads her to respect you even less.
/r/Divorce_Men04/05/24 11:07 PM
3

No group turns on men more than church people in a divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/24 10:16 AM
25

Men think that way, women don't. That's how guys get blindsided by divorce and cheating. Women are more indirect in their communication, and this behaviour is her way of saying,'I don't respect you.' If he 'works on the relationship,' she will respect him even less.
/r/MensRights24/04/24 02:26 AM
221

Mate you are in the devaluing stage now, the disrespect is only going to get worse. Don't have any more kids with her.
/r/MensRights24/04/24 12:21 AM
5

Free men from gender norms. It's not that things have changed, change is a natural process. It's just the double standard.
/r/MensRights11/04/24 09:41 AM
9

Throughout human history, there have been clearly defined gender norms, and if you violated those norms, the people around you would correct you. Men were expected to provide, women to keep house. If, as a man, you had a family but no job, people around you would tell you to get your act together. What has changed is that we have removed all gender norm expectations for women. There is no cultural way to evaluate women's behaviour any more, in any way, it's all considered good as long as it bene…
/r/MensRights11/04/24 09:35 AM
4

There are no cultural influences moderating female nature any more. This is how they would have behaved through all of human history if they could have.
/r/MensRights11/04/24 09:24 AM
1

How is it different to the first book?
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 10:05 PM
2

Ok curious now. Why did God create women with a hypergamous nature then? Why did he create them ungrateful for all the good that they are given? Destined to turn on their husbands. And please don’t say free will, that’s the evangelical copout for “God’s” deliberate design. The one thing that really strikes me about my almost 40 years attending church is during “fellowship” how the woman bag out their adoring husbands. And the men don’t even seem to notice the contempt and disgust. I just can’t r…
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 11:11 AM
1

Run my boy, it’s a trap.
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 10:13 AM
3

Pure projection. This is what women do.
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 09:33 AM
3

Bro those are acts of service. I think you know the answer.
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 09:09 AM
3

I walked away from Christianity after my divorce. I saw that women were prized and men demonized. My wife was arrested and removed from our house, they all sided with her. It was the crack in the dam wall that changed everything. I did everything right for 15 years and it was a nightmare. I earned well and supported the family, I had us on a great journey. She couldn’t cook, clean or seemingly muster the energy to put pants on in the morning. I realised that things turned out bad, because I foll…
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 09:06 AM
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