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BeautyinBrevity Archive

View 2 posts and 87 comments by BeautyinBrevity on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

I disagree. I’m not denying that women face real and serious struggles, they absolutely do. But I think it’s inaccurate to say that acknowledging men face different struggles is somehow minimizing women’s pain. The issues men and women face are often very different in nature, whether it’s mental health, family court bias, dangerous jobs, social expectations, or yes, sexual harassment and safety concerns. It doesn’t have to be a competition where one side’s struggles invalidate the other’s. Both …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/25 04:52 AM
2

I think I’ve come to the same conclusion after posting this or at least I’ve been able to comprehend it better. Privilege is the absence of a disadvantage, and intersectionality shows how even if you lack one disadvantage, you can still experience suffering or hardship, while others may have privilege over you in different ways. I also really hope there’s more pushback against using “privilege” in a derisive way
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/25 06:00 PM
2

I guess it really gets into the existential weeds, lol. But when you put it that way, it makes sense, empathy is still possible even if you haven’t experienced the exact same trauma.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 10:09 PM
2

Yeah, I think I’m trying to untangle whether privilege is really just the absence of certain struggles. And then it makes me wonder can someone truly feel empathy for an experience they’ve never lived, or does it stay more in the realm of sympathy? Haha I like your flair too, lol. 😆
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 06:02 PM
2

I am new here, and I didn’t realize that. A mind focused solely on sex is a mind not reaching its full potential.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 10:03 PM
3

Exactly, the struggle is real and it’s different
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 08:54 PM
3

I never thought of it that way before. I agree, it’s a shame we didn’t choose different words to describe this phenomenon. That said, I don’t think it’s too late to shift how we talk about it. I also think it’s important to acknowledge our privilege. But at the same time, I’d argue it’s difficult to fully empathize with something you’ve never lost or never had the foundation for in the first place. Can you have empathy with our experience?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 08:54 PM
2

I think life is about learning to love one self & others & empathy is apart of that journey. So, it’s important to me to try and bridge the gap. I am an optimist.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 08:19 PM
1

I would agree with your distinction
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 08:17 PM
2

See I think it’s a different type of privilege maybe? You’re absolutely correct, most of the danger men face does come from other men and rape is legitimate problem for women…to the point I have bonded with other women over it. But I still don’t think it’s a zero sum game. Different groups experience different risks and struggles, and both deserve attention without taking away from the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 07:44 PM
9

You aren’t low value….you carry so much empathy in your heart, and that’s a beautiful thing. I really believe that deep down, most people want the same thing: to be happy and to feel loved. When those needs are met, it’s easier for people to be kind and to make the world around them better. Social media is so curated and fake these days. I learned early on that comparison steals happiness. It’s hard not to fall into it, especially now when people are constantly showing only what they want others…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 07:40 PM
2

Right they are doing a fantastic job. I am going to disagree with you and say there are efforts and funding going toward women’s resources as well. Maybe more is going to men, I am not sure and do not have the numbers. Regardless it’s not a zero sum game and I really do want all people to have the ability to get the access to the help they need.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 07:28 PM
2

Yesssss these are the most attractive men
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 07:16 PM
1

No need to apologize. That’s exactly what I’m trying to say. I agree it shouldn’t be men vs. women. We’re all struggling in different ways. And absolutely, we need to advocate for better mental health support across the board. What I am saying is at least from social media western perspective people seem to downplay mens mental health and struggles due to privilege.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 06:23 PM
1

I didn’t intend too, I said from a individual level mine are, but I think both men’s and women’s struggles get dismissed in different ways
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:29 PM
1

Valid, I don’t think either sex has worse or better and think we all struggle.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:27 PM
1

Oh well that was not my intent, women’s problems and men’s problems are both ignored. I’m not saying men have it worse I’m saying we are all struggling. Maybe I’m wording it incorrectly I apologize
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:21 PM
17

I think part of the problem is that sometimes people use “privilege” to dismiss or invalidate someone else’s struggles, which is where a lot of the defensiveness comes from. But what you’re saying is true too, a lot of these conversations are really just asking people to be aware of different perspectives and how the system works, not to blame anyone personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:20 PM
3

I think privilege has definitely become a charged word in English. Sometimes it unintentionally sounds like someone’s being accused of having it easy, when really it’s just the absence of a particular struggle. Like you said, it’s not always something extra, it’s just not having to deal with a certain thing. The language can make people defensive even when that’s not the intention. Like someone else mentioned, this is where intersectionality really comes into play.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:18 PM
1

I don’t think everyone hates them at all. But the media and certain groups are using them as scapegoats goat unfortunately
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:11 PM
2

Well, that’s kind of my point, right? Pain is perspective, who are we to say one is better or worse than the other? Though I think this applies more to emotional or mental suffering. I might actually disagree with myself a bit when it comes to physical suffering. These debates really make my brain do work lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:03 PM
1

Well that is a nuanced perspective for sure that I was not considering
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:00 PM
1

Mmm that’s fair, I do think I am one of those people that wants to be seen & feel validated and I’m assuming a lot of other people do too.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 05:00 PM
1

Hahahaha touché if this sarcasm
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:59 PM
1

You seem to carry a lot of empathy. It is nice to meet people like that 💙😌🦋
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:58 PM
5

This actually breaks it down really well. People always want to make it black and white like “who has it worse,” but it’s really layers of privilege/oppression depending on the context. You can be advantaged in one area and disadvantaged in another at the same time. That’s why intersectionality is helpful it doesn’t erase anyone’s experience, it just acknowledges how complex it actually is. Is society like an onion?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:57 PM
1

Well I attempting not to, and my be failing from your point of view
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:45 PM
1

Yeah on a global level you’re not wrong, there’s definitely places where women face serious systemic oppression. I was mostly speaking from my personal experience and what I see around me. Both things can be true depending where and how you’re looking at it. But I’d also say that a lot of men in those same poorer countries are dealing with horrible medical care too, dying from dangerous labor, war, no mental health support, high suicide rates, etc. It’s not like most men globally are getting gre…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:39 PM
9

Yeah exactly. A lot of these convos aren’t even really about gender anymore, it’s just people pushing whatever political side they’re on. Once you bring up nuance or admit both sides struggle differently, some people just default to their talking points. Nuance takes actual effort, and a lot of people don’t wanna sit in that grey area where both things can be true. That’s why nothing ever moves forward, everyone’s too busy defending their
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:36 PM
2

This is the way of a healthy relationship 💙🦋
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:32 PM
2

It is though, I am a women and I can assure you from my point of view it is acknowledged
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:28 PM
5

So maybe I could word it better like privilege does not negate suffering? But I do think people tend to what’s the word….downplay or non validate people based on the cards they were dealt in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:26 PM
3

Sorry what do you mean here? Like women’s suffering isn’t acknowledged?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:24 PM
2

The solution for lonely men is friends and community is correct! Honestly one of the reasons I married my husband is because he is so close with his family and keeps up with his friends. I love that about him & it means I don’t have to be the only one carrying his suffering.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:22 PM
3

Yeah I totally get that and honestly I respect you being able to acknowledge both sides of it. I’m an able bodied woman and I feel safe too, but I also know that’s not everyone’s experience. Same way not every man feels safe or secure either. I think a lot of it depends on circumstances and where someone’s at in life. That’s kinda why I keep going back to the point that suffering just looks different for different people. Doesn’t mean one cancels the other out. We all got stuff we carry.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:20 PM
5

Yeah but that’s kind of the point though. Not every man is at war or working dangerous jobs just like not every woman is facing the worst of female struggles. But that doesn’t mean the issues don’t exist or aren’t systemic in certain ways. Mental health, loneliness, family court, expectations to be providers, etc it still stacks up for a lot of men. I’m not saying men have no privilege ever, but a lot of what they’re dealing with isn’t even acknowledged as real suffering half the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:13 PM
9

Exactly!!! I think many people miss this point
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:06 PM
2

Yeah I fully get what you’re saying and I actually agree men don’t get much slack at all. My point wasn’t to downplay that or say it’s not a huge issue, cuz it absolutely is. I’ve seen it first hand in my family and it’s heartbreaking how ignored men’s pain is. I just think turning it into a competition of who’s suffered more doesn’t really get us anywhere. Like everyone’s pain is valid but different. And while we’re all arguing at the bottom, the handful of people who actually control the power…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:05 PM
2

This exactly, I totally agree social media is actually making this division worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 04:03 PM
5

This! People cannot fathom someone being attracted to both. When I am with men I’m straight and when I’m with women I’m lesbian…no I’m bi.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 03:58 PM
–

Came here to say this….
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 09:29 PM
2

i agree with you that the distinction between individuals and society as a whole matters. I still think mainstream media makes things appear different than they really are. but that brings me to my other point. we’re speaking from a western perspective. in many parts of the world, women still face extreme oppression and human rights violations, including situations where women can literally be killed for dishonoring a man. i guess from my corner of the world, i just wish both men and women could…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 03:50 AM
0

🙌
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 03:43 AM
3

I disagree with you and I also think we are 1 looking through western societal lenses. 2 as someone who was a d1 athlete and dealt with an eating disorder, yeah women are absolutely taught that thinness equals worth. but honestly i think both men and women get shamed, just for different reasons. the internet pushes this whole vibe of western women being sexually free now, like sleep with whoever whenever no consequences. but when it comes to actually finding a partner, women still get judged dif…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 03:40 AM
2

It does not sound crazy and I think a lot of people actually agree with you. Call me idealistic, but I tend to believe there are people out there actively breaking free or at least trying to. I have desires and give into them at times, but ultimately I want to be better, I want to make the world a better place and I believe in human “kind” pun intended…lol
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 02:18 AM
2

we’re animals. but do we actually have the choice to break out of our animal instincts + desires? tbh, one of the coolest things about being human is how fast we build & evolve social hierarchies. no other species does that. yeah we’re shallow, but beauty + social norms literally change all the time. i think we’re at a weird point in history where people are kinda lost. for so long it was: survive, procreate, repeat. now that’s not really needed or expected anymore. so like… what’s the point now…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 01:53 AM
3

Hahahaha chaos and suffering really is embedded in our DNA ehh?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 12:02 AM
4

I get jealous too, it’s a very natural human emotion both sexes want to pretend does not exist, so I think you bring up a really valid point. And women are also taught that their value comes from men wanting them, so you do have a lot of women battling for male validation. And I can totally see your side of growing up taught you exist to protect women, only to have society say “We do not need men”. That has to hurt. And yes you can blame society it’s better to point at society rather than contri…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 09:06 PM
1

Right!!! Especially in this economy when companies are haunting buying processes! Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 09:01 PM
1

As a sales professional 20% success rate of converting cold leads to actually opportunities is badass, that is spectacular and if I was a hiring manger I would hire lol
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 08:56 PM
36

I’ll never understand how these same men get mad at women for being comfortable with their sexuality or just enjoying sex…when they’re the ones constantly chasing after women in the first place. Women are taught self control from a young age: control your desires, your weight, your anger, your emotions, while men are excused with “boys will be boys.” But ironically, men are also boxed in emotionally. They’re often only allowed to express anger or ambition, while everything else gets pushed down.…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 08:21 PM
1

Fair enough, we can agree to disagree. I think historically, women may have sought partners with greater financial means because they had to. We literally couldn’t open our own credit cards until 1974. But I still don’t agree with the idea that women inherently want someone “better” in all aspects. In reality, we’re often drawn to traits in others that complement, not surpass, our own. Sometimes we admire qualities we lack, but that doesn’t mean we want someone who outshines us across the board.…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:18 PM
1

Emotional intelligence wise maybe? Is it societal due to the way we raise women, is purely biological, or a combination of the both, I don’t know. And I think most women want someone at their level not necessarily above. When choosing a partner i believe most of us want to know we can count on the other person and they want to know they can count on us. Especially in this economy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 08:14 PM
–

Generalized as much as possible? Why? And why are men hard to generalize? Every gender deviates from the average. Can you give me examples of why men can’t be?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 05:46 PM
3

And have science illiteracy. I actually work in the medical field and I was just talking to someone about this. I believe we should have access to that information but we need to better educated our population. If people were educated to understand the scientific method and have critical thinking skills society would improve. Or at least I’d like to think so.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 11:54 PM
2

This exactly, I get it, generalizations happen, but if we are going to make hypothesis about a category of people we should at least use studies.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 11:51 PM
4

Oh my gosh!!! Yes, so much this. As a former D1 XC and track athlete, I’ve always had amazing friendships with both men and women. I still run with running clubs to this day! You’re absolutely right when we build friendships with people of the opposite sex (or just different from us in general), we start to realize we’re really not that different. And totally agree, these days, it feels like everyone is trying to sell you something, even spirituality. If you’re selling me something, I’m immediat…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 08:36 PM
1

Oh do a miss nuance 😂
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 07:51 PM
3

Fair point, I think I worded my opinion poorly. It’s not that I believe generalizations are inherently bad; I’m just frustrated by how often they’re used to pit men and women against each other without any room for nuance. And personally, I do think there’s been a rise in the categorization of people…more than ever, it feels like folks are standing in arbitrary camps instead of engaging with complexity.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 07:35 PM
2

Touché, you have me there. My question is why can we not acknowledge there are struggles on both sides and work together to fix them?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:56 PM
–

Okay….
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:47 PM
2

I’m not denying that generalizations exist, I just think that when they’re applied without nuance and used to confine people (or ourselves) to a fixed identity, they become harmful to society. That’s my perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:33 PM
1

You’re right that hierarchies and groupings are part of human nature and history. I’m not arguing against recognizing patterns or biological realities. We clearly have differences. But the point is, how we use those groupings matters. Saying “there will always be an ‘us’ and a ‘them’” might be true historically, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t strive for more cooperation and understanding today. Tribalism served survival in early human history, but now we live in a global, interconnected soci…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:26 PM
5

Totally fair point. I’m not saying we should never make generalizations, just that we need to hold them lightly. Patterns can help us understand the world, but they shouldn’t replace curiosity about the individual in front of us. The issue is when generalizations get used as shortcuts for truth, rather than as starting points for understanding. If they help guide inquiry, great. If they become walls between people, that’s when we lose the plot.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:24 PM
1

I actually agree with a lot of what you said about generalizations…they can be useful for spotting patterns, as long as we don’t treat them as absolute truths. I really respect your point about being an individual within a group, and I think that message needs more airtime. We can acknowledge trends without demanding everyone fit them. As for the APA guidelines, I understand your skepticism. It’s totally fair to question sources, especially when they intersect with ideology. That said, the guide…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:23 PM
1

I get where you’re coming from generalizations can reveal patterns across groups, and they can be useful when used carefully and with context. That’s why ask the question is it necessary to make sense of patterns? But there’s a difference between describing trends and turning them into fixed expectations about individuals. The problem isn’t data itself. It’s when generalizations are used to justify bias or limit people’s choices and potential. That’s not about “emotional safety” it’s about recog…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:21 PM
5

Hahaha 😂 it’s easier to point outward than inward ain’t it
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 06:17 PM
1

Like I’ve said, categorization can be helpful..it helps us organize information and identify patterns. But when it becomes rigid and oversimplified, especially around identity, it stops being useful and starts being limiting. The world really is shades of gray, not black and white, and trying to reduce people to fixed categories can do more harm than good. This is my opinion and you are free to think I’m wrong and disagree.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:49 PM
3

You’re right…communication is hard, especially online where tone, context, and intent are easy to miss. A lot of people genuinely struggle to express themselves clearly, especially when emotions are involved, and that leads to a lot of miscommunication and frustration. It’s human, and it makes sense that people sometimes fall back on generalizations or simple narratives to feel in control or understood. You’re also right that science uses labels. It has to labels help researchers define variable…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:47 PM
–

I’d encourage you to look into intersectional feminism. Lately society has been putting down one group to lift up another. This does not have to be the case.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:43 PM
2

I couldn’t agree more, I think you bring up some valid solutions😌
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:41 PM
2

Thank you 🙏
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:40 PM
12

What do you mean I don’t believe in data or science? I asked for your dataset, your methodology, and your statistical analysis, because that’s literally how science works. Using data responsibly means questioning it, verifying it, and making sure it’s not being misrepresented. That’s not rejecting science, that’s practicing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:39 PM
7

We have to remember, though, that you’re only seeing one slice of the culture. Just because Hollywood promotes a more liberal lifestyle doesn’t mean that the pressure to have kids has disappeared. The judgment often shows up in more subtle ways…family comments, workplace assumptions, and even healthcare bias. Also, not all pressure comes from explicit statements like “you have to have kids.” It can be the constant implication that something’s missing if you don’t. That messaging is still very re…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:37 PM
15

I’d love to see your dataset and research. What was your sample size, and what’s the p-value of your analysis? Did you find correlations?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:35 PM
6

I appreciate the push for evidence. That’s a totally fair question. Cultural expectations aren’t always written into law or highlighted in news articles, but they’re deeply embedded in media, workplace dynamics, and everyday social interactions. For example, when women choose not to have kids, they’re often labeled selfish, cold, or told they’ll regret it. You can see that messaging in everything from celebrity interviews to political commentary. As for expectations like men paying on the first …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:31 PM
8

Actually, that’s a fair critique of some feminists, especially in past waves. But modern intersectional feminism is very much centered on shared human needs and personal responsibility. It acknowledges that patriarchy affects everyone, including men, and pushes for a society where we’re all free to be fully human…not boxed in by outdated roles. If we’re serious about unity and progress, we have to stop treating feminism like it’s the enemy and start talking about the version that’s evolved.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:28 PM
5

True I guess at the end of the day we need to all sharpen our critical thinking skills 😌
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:25 PM
11

I’d ask…what women are we talking about here? Because women, like men, aren’t a monolith. Some follow traditional trends, sure, but plenty don’t. There’s a huge range of what different people value in a partner, and reducing it to a single data trend kind of misses that nuance. Data can be helpful, but only if we remember it reflects averages, not individuals. Otherwise, we end up making sweeping claims that don’t leave room for real people
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:24 PM
10

I think you bring up a valid point. Rigid gender expectations harm everyone, but they often play out differently for men and women. It’s true that men face unique pressures around performance, stoicism, and productivity, and that needs to be acknowledged and addressed. And honestly society tends to dispose of men, who are struggling or do not meet expectations (i.e. between 60-70% of the homeless population in the US are men). That said, I don’t think the solution is to assume women get to do wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:20 PM
7

I agree that generalizations can sometimes be helpful, and you’re right that different situations and life experiences shape behavior. But when generalizations become too extreme or leave no room for nuance, they can actually harm progress and push people further apart instead of bringing us together. Generalizations can help us make quick judgments or feel safer in uncertain situations, but they also come with a cost. For example, saying “men don’t show emotion” not only reinforces outdated gen…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:13 PM
1

I think if you are going to generalize as we all do (because it’s hard not too) that’s an amazing prompt 😌
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:09 PM
5

This is a great question. I agree that starting with consent, family structures, and how we raise children is essential. So much of our cultural conditioning begins early. If we want a truly fair, gender-neutral society, we need to rethink the roles we assign from the start and make room for emotional intelligence, equity, and shared responsibility. At the end of the day, we all want to be loved, to love, and to feel safe. And while it’s often said, I truly believe education (thoughtful, inclusi…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:08 PM
3

Hahaha this meme literally made me chuckle. It makes me so angry especially since I almost lost my brother to suicide early last year.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:02 PM
–

I get that generalizations can sometimes help us make sense of things or move the conversation forward when we’re talking about the majority. But I agree, I can’t deal with how extreme and constant it is on Twitter.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:01 PM
–

So be it lol I truly believe vast generalizations are harmful and low eq. I feel like the world is getting more “categorized” than it has ever been. The world is scale of grey not black and white in my humble opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 03:56 PM
–

This. Men don’t share their experiences enough. I can’t tell you how many men I’ve met, often just in passing since I tend to make friends everywhere, who’ve ended up confiding in me about their experiences with sexual trauma, including rape. I’ve held many men in my arms while they cried, and it breaks my heart and finally released the pain. As a woman who’s also experienced sexual trauma, I know how devastating it is, but I had people to lean on, to talk to, to help me process. Many of these m…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 02:34 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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