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Bernie51Williams Archive

View 4 posts and 186 comments by Bernie51Williams on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

You're fucking insane. She will fuck who she wants when she wants ypu will pay for her to do it.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 04:53 PM
1

If she has kids she destroyed another man for the excitement of getting her face jizzed on. They're disgusting.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 12:56 PM
0

There is no family. Family is a privilege and so many people whine and bitch endlessly but have parents siblings uncles etc....everything anyone coukd ever want but their privileged ass is just complaining they don't have more. I'm so tired of people with perfect lives destroying mine.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 11:20 AM
0

Some of us don't deserve love
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 11:18 AM
4

Not even. Spark is gone once the chance of a cock enters the room. Work so hard to destroy you but then complain the spark is gone.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 11:18 AM
3

You dont love anyone and they didn't love you. Stop acting like a movie. You know damn well there is no such as love its called responsibility and she will never have responsibility but you do. Stop confusing things and making them more than they are.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 09:24 PM
12

She's a bitch because she's a useless piece of shit. She knows it so she tries to hurt everybody else instead of working on her own shit. Why would any woman care about her own issue if she has a line of people waiting for her dump it on them, use and abuse them?
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 05:34 PM
1

Well that's the rules of a relationship. You support they abuse. Those are the FUCKING RULES. Now you know. Don't play the game if you don't want to lose.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 05:32 PM
4

Worthless
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 03:02 PM
3

The key is to learn this very young and never care about it.
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/24 02:58 PM
8

Hey Not cool. No guns in this situation at all.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 06:36 AM
1

No offense and it shouldn't be taken personally it's just the way things are. A woman hits her prime in her 20s while a man's hits his in his 40s. Now this doesn't mean as a man in my 40s I should be shopping for women in their 20s, I much prefer a mid 30s woman who has her shit together. It's almost unfair to both sexes that this dynamic plays out the way it does. As for leadership I am still learning. Leading is HARD. The one thing that we men tend to do is begin the relationship with attracti…
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/24 02:20 PM
1

My wife did none of this, not one bullet point and I'll never understand why when I was so willing. Our issues were manageable, simply show each other love, listen and make each other a priority. Boom marriage fixed, happiness incoming. Shrug
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 02:16 PM
2

Scorpion and the frog. It's just in my nature should be the answer you get when asking WHY.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 01:57 PM
1

Exactly what I was going to say. Insurance is for the unexpected, with 70% of marriages ending in divorce with 70% from walk away wives no way it's going to be insurable. I could see gay male marriages being insured, they have lower rates seeing as how men want to own their shit and work on their relationships with others.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 01:36 PM
3

It will ease the ruminating.
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/24 02:27 AM
12

Be glad. Better you find out who she is now than years later. I'm sorry man but look at it as a blessing. Own your part, she was likely bored and you didn't keep her entertained but that in no way justifies cheating. Remember if you take her back she will never stop once she knows she can get away with it. Lift in the morning, cardio in the early evening, sleep by 9pm if you can. Exhaust yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 11:55 PM
3

Well said.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 09:27 PM
7

This is true
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 04:12 AM
2

It's hard to be a man these days, very hard. It's pretty lonely for us around 40. But yea you have to get out there and do things, as for online conversations those days are over. There are a few social spaces and that's about it. Best idea would be to find a support group nearby, I've found a few. Meet in person and talk it out.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/24 04:38 PM
1

Well damn you def went much further than you should have. If there's cheating I don't even think reconsiliation should be considered. The cheater has to show true remorse and attone and EVEN if they do the other party has to think about thr cheating forever. I've heard some people reconcile but then it usually fails a year afterwards or even 5 years afterwards. Spending all those years trying to forget something terrible someone did sounds like torture.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/24 03:28 PM
1

Was there infidelity on your side or what was the reason for seperation? Did she date anyone while separated and then come back? I'm wondering your reasons for not trying to reconcile seeing as most people here want to at least try? What's the reason for not attempting to save it? I'm also trying to figure out what I want, if she's srs and if I think she can really change the things that need to be changed.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/24 01:40 PM
1

I crave and miss. The fucked up thing is I can deal with the missing, but I don't ever want to lose the craving. The crave makes me feel ALIVE.
/r/Divorce_Men04/05/24 08:54 PM
3

I say this with all due respect. It can only work separated if both of you TRULY want it to work. That means not waiting for someone to prove something to you but you focusing on proving it to them while they do the same. Both of you have to be able to TRULY understand what the other is saying and changing your behaviors. You have to LISTEN and accept maybe if you had the right intentions your delivery was flawed. That's hard. It's not impossible. But that's marriage works, it must be the same a…
/r/Divorce_Men04/05/24 08:52 PM
8

All night on the phone? All weekend with another woman? Think again my friend.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 10:08 PM
10

I mean I couldn't even add anything if I wanted to. 1000 up votes. If your woman does this or acts this way, the above is why. Stop trying to figure it out or beg for mercy, that will make it worse.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 10:07 PM
14

To reinforce their decision by pulling a reaction out of you. They can't understand maybe just maybe they contributed heavily to their own downfall, that you weren't responsible for thier actions. So they are going to hurt you in any way so you react and your reaction is their proof. It's classic projection/deflection. But to answer why? I have no idea, just own your shit ladies. But that's all we really wanted the whole time.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 10:05 PM
1

Shitty thing is most them do get there to that point where they push through things, most of the time we all HAVE to. Men reach this stage earlier I think because there is so much pressure on us to protect, provide and be a rock. It just sucks that she couldn't do it to save us. Fight for it! Who cares about what anyone thinks also, like I'll never make a decision based on what other people think of it, especially if it involves my future or happiness. It's my life and if other people have a pro…
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 09:03 PM
1

💯 I have been a simp to my wife as much as I hate to admit it and always said I'll never be that guy. She gave up, she was abusive and I was the one asking her to talk, pleading. I should have just left when she showed me she wasn't willing to cooperate or work towards change. It takes alot to say that, I never saw myself as that guy. But marriage changes you, it's that much harder to stay true to yourself when you have so much to lose.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 08:58 PM
2

It's funny how it all works out the same for so many of us. Actions actions actions.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 04:33 PM
3

Yep yep same. Even though she quit on us, stopped trying literally anything, raged for months and walked out. Anything I said or tried just made her angrier. She misses me now but I need to see she loves me.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 04:30 PM
1

This hits hard today. Sad but seems true.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 04:09 PM
1

It's what you have to do when faced with reality. If my ex don't want me, someone hotter will. She has her opportunity to keep me but if I'm not getting what I need from her, not seeing what I need to see in order to believe she really wants me....then move on. My ex is smoking hot as well, but she's one of many. If I lose her there will be another and I never date down, I always date one hotter than the last because I keep improving. That being said I still want reconsiliation I want to keep wh…
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 04:07 PM
1

Hell yra brother, know your worth and good job on killing it out there. Get yours, she quit on you.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 04:02 PM
1

Tell that to our wives
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 03:56 PM
2

All I want is someone willing to fight. For me. For once. If that fight means they have improve themselves then fine. But I want someone who will not look at their unhappiness and then immediately point at me. I don't feel that's too hard but for my wife it is. That's emotional immaturity and I begged her to find growth and change. It's ironic leaving me was the one thing that prompted her growth. I built my life around her, bought the house for her and her daughter but I guess that doesn't mean…
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 03:55 PM
3

Same. I was gaslit all over the place. What did do? I kept trying harder..and harder.. and harder...and the harder I tried she withdrew. She was DETERMINED to MAKE me the reason for her unhappiness. She was going to pin me as the reason for unhappiness no matter what. So I finally let her and she walked. I've made mistakes in my marriage. I am a human man, but I NEVER made her the REASON for my unhappiness, I tried to work on it from within in order to show her I love her and I can grow. I'll ne…
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 03:03 PM
5

I feel this so much. She based her happiness on me while I based mine on myself. There were many times she made me UNHAPPY but I never tried to find my happiness because of her. All I want, all most of us want Is a partner. Someone who can LEARN to be happy, not shift blame. Anyone who is unhappy is unhappy with themselves. Period. We are to support each other in that regard. Help them FIND happiness. She moved out and is happy. Why? It's not because she lost me it's because she proved to hersel…
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 02:51 PM
0

Women will never be equal when it comes to emotions though. Hers will always trump yours. You have to understand that.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 01:25 PM
5

Hey man. You didn't have much to lose and that's hard to hear from others that have lost lost thier families and sense of self. But it doesn't make your journey less difficult than any other. I do think you will look at this as a blessing at your age and years invested. You just made the wrong choice, you thought with all your heart she was the one but she proved you wrong. It's OK. By your post you are in incredible shape and beaming with confidence except....I know...loss hurts no matter how g…
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 02:15 AM
6

Save the goodbye message. Write to yourself and burn it. She gave up on you, your "goodbye" means nothing to her. When someone let's you know for serious there is no going back there is no working it out you don't OWE them anything if you tried with your heart. I'm sorry but also proud of you. I feel all the feels you do. I'm not saying I'm better than you or I know better, but....write those things for the one person that cares about them. You.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/24 02:04 AM
2

You know. I had a talk with the wife today. I am trying hard to hear her side but I will also NEVER excuse HER abuse. When you say we can be abusive without even knowing it...that's what I'm learning, POSSIBLY. When a woman is abusive you know it, it's clear cut venom and mine is crazy AF and will not calm down, I almost love her for it though (bad I know). What they think of abuse could be a single comment, a certain attitude one afternoon. You chalk it up to being in a bad mood but they truly …
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 10:10 PM
1

Agreed. Because it's usually one party asking or begging the other to do it. The only way it's successful is if both parties are 100% invested and committed to improving themselves as INDIVIDUALS. I want that for my wife, it hurts that she excited and happy at her new place but if that's what it took for her to get her confidence back...I guess it ok. She moved in with me at 22, she never lived IN HER OWN, I think she needed to prove she could do it. I wish she would have been comfortable here s…
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 09:50 PM
1

This is a great point. Being Mr. Responsible doesn't warrant abusive behavior from her but you need to look at why she's upset. If I could do it again I just try to show my wife I am exciting and fun still. But I can't do it on the backburner or on the side. Shed have to commit to change in herself and our dynamic. Separated that's hard and I don't think she cares enough anymore. But that's life, my next woman will unfortunately get the best me, it's not what I WANT, but if my wife won't work wi…
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 01:38 PM
6

Good Read. Sad but true.
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/24 01:33 PM
5

This sounds pretty spot on with narcissistic bpd behavior man. Especially the apology portion.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/24 09:15 PM
2

Ata boy. Drill it in your fucking head. Understand your value.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 08:30 PM
3

Because she will do anything to make herself happy in the .moment. she can't take temporary discomfort and pain for the benefit of others, like her own children. She is worried about nothing but her and getting that dick. Now ask yourself, after she shown you who she is, would you really want that? You can do better. People often show you who they are. Belive them. Edit- Women will only work as hard as they have to. Keep them working on keeping you around.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 07:03 PM
10

That woukd probably be the best advice in your situation. Other than that? TAKE IT EASY ON YOURSELF, men are way to rough on themselves. It was not OUR job or responsibility to fix her, realize your value, see your potential and slay some pussy. Think of all the possibilities that just opened up for you. Enjoy yourself, there are woman out there who WANT to do for you all the things your ex wouldn't and want nothing in return. There are woman who WANT to earn your love and show you. Make sure yo…
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 06:46 PM
3

I thought I did too. But I found out I was living with my enemy. For some reason she turned me into her enemy....betrayal. If you're down about this that means you're a good man, likely pure of heart. They will see the grass isn't greener on the other side and they will self destruct. Many if not most women all regret divorcing their husband's but they will never let you know it, now the next guy has to deal with her and her frustration she carries for leaving you. Since women live and die with …
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 02:11 PM
1

I don't. I have no idea what your dream is but if it is with someone who doesn't respect you then you need to reevaluate your dreams.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 06:54 AM
5

You want "your girl" back not that washed up bitch. You want to put you dick in that now? Tainted, forever. Let someone with no goals and a weak reputation bang that puss. It's worthless now. Likely looks like roast beef out window at 55 mph. Reality will hit her and she will regret leaving you forever. Take solace in that. Stop saying those things. It was just your turn remember that a woman is never YOURS. You however 🤴 are yours and you should know your worth. A woman deserving of you would N…
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 01:42 AM
2

Yea I was swindled into thinking I actually mattered. I know I matter to the child and she will be in therapy for what her mom has done, I was the only man in her entire childhood that showed her genuine love and that she could count on.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 02:32 PM
7

I would also suggest r/NarcissisticAbuse
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 12:44 AM
2

Same. I can relate to this. I was ashamed I chose someone so lost and childish.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 12:26 AM
4

Um look. My situation is very different as there never was any intimacy just sex, she didn't have real soul. But if she left you and likely fucked you over there wasn't intimacy, even healthy women don't really experience intimacy you just give them the tingles. If she genuinely loved you why did she give up on you, or cheat on you, or abuse you? Understand it for what it was and get your intimacy from within. You got this. You know when you look back on things with rose colored glasses all the …
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 10:12 PM
5

Those men are the strongest ones. I am one of them. Do you know how much strength is takes to stay with someone for years who hates you and purposely shows you disrespect. It's maddening and it takes STRENGTH. These men aren't weak by any means, confused yes but not weak. That's why guys like us blossom so much afterwards. We can now use all that strength on ourselves.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 01:25 PM
7

Yea they got me too. Not an even a goodbye at the end after fathering the child for almost 13 years. And I supported the shit out of them. Every practice, band rehearsal, soccer game, CC meets etc...I was there for all of it and I got ghosted in the end. Can't make this shit up.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 01:20 PM
7

Don't forgive them at all. Forgive yourself for staying and losing your self respect. You don't need to forgive anyone else for the terrible shit they've done. They are not remorseful, forgiveness is earned through showing new actions. Forgive yourself, understand your value.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 01:19 PM
3

Appreciated. Stay up King.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 03:37 AM
3

My blood pressure was stroke level, had to get on meds for months. When she finally left my levels were normal. The amount a damage an abusive person can do to your health is staggering.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 02:39 AM
3

Unfortunately she was never there at all. I lived in a fantasy where this person once loved me. But i see I was used from the very beginning. The person I divorced is the same person I married. I just wouldn't accept the truth.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 02:36 AM
2

More importantly, you are in control of YOUR life. NO longer do you have to be burden and saddled with someone else shame, guilt, insecurities and projection. Cheers.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 02:33 AM
2

More importantly your emotions are likely JUSTIFIED while your worthless wifes emotions were CREATED to justify her actions.. Think about that for a moment.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/24 08:06 PM
2

The women are. Use them as they use you. Mutual.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/24 08:05 PM
5

Dude. It's not talking that way. You're setting yourself up for failure. I know easier to give advice than take it but srs, you have to get the fuck up and stop letting someone control you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/24 08:04 PM
8

I'm not afraid of shit. I'm good looking and so are you. If you're not then get good looking you know what to do. I have the world at my fingertips without anyone holding me down. Do I miss my wife? Every hour ATM. But I miss who I thought she was. If she loved me she wouldn't have so much difficultly showing me..
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/24 08:02 PM
1

Aye
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/24 07:56 AM
7

Mine is hot as fuck to me as well. 10/10 would fuck again. I worshipped her body. It was her mind that destroyed her and thus...us. Bodies can be sculpted. My shit is looking chefs kiss. I won't ever care about a woman's body ever again if I'm looking for a relationship. If I'm looking anyway she will have a nice body cause I wouldn't commit, but her mind is more important, her childhood, her relationship with her parents, her respect for men. I feel you though, it's in your DNA to guard your pu…
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/24 08:01 PM
1

High class escort.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 01:42 PM
4

100%
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 01:33 PM
5

Shit. I have no net worth now. Most of us don't. Who cares you're just DATING you're not marrying the broad. Rebuild your shit, fuck a woman's net worth lmao it will never matter to me as I ain't signing a legal document with anyone ever. And even a relationship doesn't mean you're in any way responsible for her financial health... Sorry. I don't get it or understand the post u less you're already looking at marrige. And if it means that much to you for dating or a relationship then you have you…
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/24 11:59 PM
19

They burn every bridge to force a reaction so that's what they can remember. To justify their selfishness and crazy behavior, disloyalty etc... It's all to make themselves feel better by destroying you. Pathetic and weak. And if you're with one who's TRULY disordered, they will try to burn your WORLD down. Stay up, fuck em, look at their weak frame and childish actions for what it is. Weakness. Cowardness.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/24 10:47 AM
4

Let me ask you, what are you doing to promote your healing? List the things you have worked on in the past 2 years. You should be better than you were in every area of your life with her. So let's fix that.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/24 01:01 PM
2

Flanders is ripped dude.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/24 02:12 PM
2

Can you arrange one for me? Contact my wife and let her know I'd like to be married and not waste 12 years of me building a future for us.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/24 12:42 AM
7

I probably gave her this speech 100 times in the last 5 years. She was determined to show me how little she cares about me.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/24 11:47 PM
5

Affection, connection, respect and kindness seem so foreign to me.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/24 11:46 PM
1

Expand on the last line please? Also I don't want to date. I actually despise the word date and the phrase dating lol. I'm here for the fun.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 02:39 PM
2

I recognize it was my fault it lasted so long. I deserv3d so much more, I deserved basic human respect. That's what I'm working on, my role was letting someone treat me like a fucking object who then sprinkled in an I love you a few times a week. My obsession prevented me from doing what I should until It didn't, and in the end I was validated as she refused to fight, change anything or even admit to rampant abuse, just as I foretold. So yea I'm working on it, however our experiences can not be …
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 02:36 PM
1

And that repeats every other day forever.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 07:18 AM
3

Hell no lol where's your self respect. This is how you get wrapped up with predators. There's a million hot women out there.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 07:15 AM
2

Oh I've done research for 8 years. I basically have a PHD. Not to mention what I've lived through. It's devastating when you woukd do anything for someone if they only did something for themselves. I love her more than life itself. If you've been through it you understand the trauma of not being able to leave nor stay.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 07:13 AM
3

Oh I do. Even though it was mostly reactionary I still cringe for participating. But someone coming at you for 2 weeks? Silent treatment for 30 days? I thought I had it under control at one time but I woukd invetibly break around day 10 of her episodes. All the stress, lack of sex, and just her spending our money, throwing trash all over, not participating in any household chores or cleaning her dishes...she would just quit living and force me to pick the pieces of her own actions. It was pretty…
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 07:02 AM
2

Same. Same. And I still fought for the marriage knowing all this until I finally gave up when the realization hit she either actively enjoys this and/or had dug herself so deep with lies she wouldn't dare admit the truth to family cause then HER reputation is on the line. So I suffer more.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 06:59 AM
1

What's your quota 3? And some flags have a higher score than others.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 06:56 AM
6

Well mine wasn't my fault. As much as I would love to assign myself blame, it would make it so much easier to deal with, loving someone so much who hates you, wanting nothing more in life than to be with them but they are Incapable at looking at they behave and ridiculously abusive they truly are. I know it sounds ridiculous but the trauma bond is real. I would walk through hell and back for that woman if she would have only gotten some help for herself. I've never been so attached to one person…
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 06:55 AM
1

Oof.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 03:51 AM
4

It sucks for the actual 20% of women out there who are telling the truth. But it's your people ruining your own reputation ladies. Not my problem.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:59 PM
3

Don't worry. I've heard worse and I've heard it for 8 years. I promise you, I understand. If you've been with one, you know.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:52 PM
5

Aye. After going through it I can't help but be disgusted when I hear it from their mouths. In reality its about 20% of us yet 80% of women use it as their primary justification for not being accountable and sucking your neighbors cock. She just HAD too, THERE WAS NO CHOICE! THAT DICK WAS SO HARD, WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:49 PM
1

Good. Fail it. Let her know if she wants to see failure you'll give it to her. She deserves for you to fail her. Some chump can play Captain save a hoe and she can be emotionally abused him now.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:47 PM
3

Yea. I almost wish mine was like this, it woukd have been better than her being extremely abusive and blaming me, I'd rather just have her blame me and NOT be the abusive sack she was. But this is exactly it. She sitting down with someone explaining your abuse, well not explaining just lying, to get into my pants. I just say I don't belive you so no need to justify your actions to me. Every woman that says she was emotionally abused without some concrete specifics is automatically tossed in the …
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:44 PM
3

Next time don't end it, just slow it down and let her make the decision. Stay in control, call the shots, let them walk you'll have others lined up anyways.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:37 PM
2

Word 💪 👑
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:36 PM
2

Not narcissistic to be proud of what you worked for. At all, I'm very sensitive to the word narcissistic. But I think right in line with that thinking. As high value men, make sure you dictate how your time will be spent and how your life will play out.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:35 PM
3

I mean, I wouldn't mind living with a good earner. I'll never sign any joint paperwork, but I'd live with someone again. Bjs on demand are pretty nice.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:33 PM
5

Fo sho. Now it's about variety and I don't think there's many women out there that deserve me all to themselves. My ex wife certainly didn't. I seem to find some good hearted ones at a few places I do volunteer work but AWALT eventually. I dunno, MAYBE when one comes along who's also hot enough, regulated and a decent earner? But marriage NEVER, there's no point, her mental illness could come out after that, prenump not worth the risk of it being tossed. I've got about 3 months of physical self …
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 02:29 PM
2

Agreed. I can only speak for what I went through and that shit wasn't baseline or shit tests. However I see many stories here and there are NOT always 2 sides to every story, reactions to abuse are not offenses.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 01:44 PM
4

Aye
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 04:34 AM
2

Only way to win is not to play. Don't get married, nobody can take shit from you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 10:11 PM
3

She will realize what she lost, tell her ypu know she fucked up and it's her turn to deal with it. Tell her you love her but you're not in love with her in 2 years when she reaches out.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/24 05:08 PM
5

Pffft. Sounds like you're living in the past and not enjoying your life. The way you feel is on YOU. You are letting yourself feel this way "on this side of divorce". What about the dreams you have with the ability to now achieve them? What about the quality women and pussy way better than your shitty ex? Life on this SIDE, is miles better than being woth someone who treats you like shit and/or doesn't want you. Always remember that last sentence King. Life is miles better on this side than bein…
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/24 05:06 PM
13

She's worthless. Would a best friend not work on having a relationship with you or taking accountability for how she feels?
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/24 05:03 PM
7

Covert narcissism is running WILD in women. Between this sub and r/narcissisticabuse it's the same story over and over.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/24 01:22 PM
2

They try to wear you down. It's exhausting when you're constantly defending and explaining which you should NEVER do, but they DARVO so hard you get caught.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 12:13 PM
3

Well you know the inevitable trait that defines a psychopath is empathy. Ask yourself, can she demonstrate empathy to you? Scary, but you must face it.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 12:12 PM
14

There some that enjoy causing pain and I think about 25% here have been down that road of the covert. Only thing that matters is you stay on your grind. And I hate the word grind, it's grinds my gears, but it's applicable. My Kings here know they have a much better quality of life and much better quality of women now that the person working against them is gone. It's about never letting yourself to get to that point again where a woman any power of you, financially, emotionally etc...cut them ou…
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 12:08 PM
1

Mine bring up divorce from the year we were married every month after for 8 years. Then we would swear to never say the D word she would say it and accuse me of brininging it up which of course didn't happen, just gaslighting. I never doubted for a minute I'd be divorced. She showed me at every turn what she thought of me, what she wanted me to know and where this was going. I just didn't care for whatever reason until I did. Most of us married to these people already know where it's heading bec…
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 01:06 AM
1

Yea man. Its the same story everywhere. Happy you were able to identify the problem and correct it. I feel like I have a true unfair advantage now after being with a female narc for so long. I can identify them within hours. Play the game, cum on their face and never ever reach out again. They are worthless.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 10:08 PM
1

It ain't stopping. It's going to ramp up the more you attempt to address it. The only win here is not to play the psychopaths game.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 10:05 PM
1

That won't do shit but make her go harder. She will go until she forces your hand to bounce her then start the smear campaign against you. Ignore it, everyone knows it's fake. And women all know what other women do. They don't even belive each other when they are "supporting" each other, they're talking shit behind her back while yelling her I'm so sorry you had to go through that emotional abuse. They know she was the one who couldn't control herself. It's a game, it's all mental and subconscio…
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 10:04 PM
2

Dog. They realize it. All of them. Even the ones who aren't full fledged narcissists which is now about 25% of all women those are pump n dumps. Don't fool yourself dog. Stop convincing yourself this human isn't aware of what they are doing. Everyone is.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 10:01 PM
1

Oh I'd been doing that for 3 years lmao
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 09:59 PM
1

When you're in it it's kinda hard to see through the FOG. As it gets closer to the end you can clearly see through but once it's done you miss the cycle. You've been trained by the drama machine to look forward to it. The lows are low but the feeling you used to get when it over and things were OK were highs. Get used to a constant happy baseline. This baseline is full of opportunities, women, money, trips, a better you and all the things you want but we're held back from by that nagging bitch. …
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 09:59 PM
2

How about don't ask them for shit and let them come to you? That's how I play homie.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/24 12:52 AM
13

Should be top comment. Give zero fucks. You should be concerned with YOUR life, your happiness, the quality of pussy YOU want. Period.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 10:24 PM
4

Ata boy
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 10:23 PM
7

LMAO Just be glad it wasn't a true covert narcissist. May have been who knows. But after this I can smell the bullshit and easily bounce any bitch from my life in a single afternoon. No thoughts, no guilt, just get the fuck on. Remember boys, women are meant to COMPLIMENT your life, once that is no longer apparent its time to cut them off. We ALL win in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 10:21 PM
1

Change is fine. Complete lack of respect and forms of abuse are a different story.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 03:00 PM
2

Women get married hoping the man will change. Men get married hoping the woman never changes.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 11:08 PM
0

Yea but I'm not attracted to dudes.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 11:03 PM
2

It's really hard the older you are. And I know I deserve better, I've deserved better from many things in life. It just doesn't seem to work out for me.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 02:39 AM
11

Another female covert narcissist. Start researching the terms above, you'll find your entire relationship was fake. She never cared about you at all. Ever. She's an abusive POS.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/24 04:27 PM
5

I'm not dating. I'm fucking
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/24 02:14 AM
4

Your wifes payments are classified as "income".
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 11:35 PM
3

Fuxking bitch drinks from another man's cock and wants equity in the house. There's is no such thing as no fault. Unless 2 people agree there's no fault. Fuck these hoes. She she be awarded NOTHING and have to pay for your therapy. I will bounce a bitch the second she mentions marriage. Bitch will have to put a hefty deposit in my off shore account.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 09:18 PM
6

I'd give anything to be a shower. At least you always get the benefit of the doubt.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 03:53 PM
15

Friendly reminder If a woman says marriage or I'm leaving she's leaving. No woman is more important than MY future. Because YOU aren't more important than HERS. And you did it again, I wish I was there bitch smack you into reality. Like my ex brother in law. Bitching about how many kids he had at 4, proceeds to try for 2 more, now miserable and always bitching.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/24 11:52 PM
0

This is my EXACT life. I can't seem to correct the behavior ever. It's validating to see all these people assuming narcissism in a non narc sub where over there every person is a narcissist. People say my mom and dad and sister and girlfriend and my aunt are narcissists..help! This is the behavior of someone truly damaged and out to hurt others for their own relief. I just wish she would work on it or even TRY to prove me wrong, stop the behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 06:11 PM
1

This seems to be an epidemic as I see more and more reports of this female behavior. The broken family that began in the 90s with the woman's divorce movement making divorce just not a real possibility but the actual preference when they have to put forth effort, it has caused hundreds of millions of broken childhood trauma which is where and how these disorders are formed. We're are now seeing the effects from blowing up the nuclear family. A nation of psychopaths. Edit- Men too. The fact that …
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 06:07 PM
1

OP I lived your life for years, this same behavior for 8 years..longer actually but I didn't really notice it was on purpose until year 4 so about 8 years of this abuse. I'm still in it. I'm still stuck. You need to start really digging into the "female covert narcissist". It's thing that will make sense. You also were married young so you probably don't remember what a normal woman does when she's upset or hurting. This has become all you know. My wife will read this post, she will find it, she…
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 06:00 PM
1

God I need to repeat this every hour. I have for several years but just can't disconnect from the woman I love and committed to. She has done WAY more much much more than in this post if you can belive it. It seems OP has only went through a year of this at this point. I'm on year 5-6 of this behavior. Bawling tears, uncontrollable all the time, she smirks, walks away and gives me silent treatment or locks me out of the room for weeks. Weeks at a time. I know she's a bad person. I just swear tha…
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 05:44 PM
2

This is my story 100%. I can never do anything but anything is not enough. I am just told I am a piece of shit and I'm stonewalled for weeks at a time. I don't really work anymore, the pain and anxiety is crippling. I have nothing left, no reason to fight, my one true love treats me as her worst enemy and all I ever wanted was her love. I feel I can't go on, it's hopeless, I used to have the strength but she has wore me down time and time again creating the extreme fear that she literally hates …
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 05:04 PM
1

Childhood, which leads to entitlement and personality disorders.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 11:17 AM
0

I hear you. I said yes to my wife on all the major decisions (moving, spending larger sums of money, remodeling, buying property, etc.). She got what she asked for, and, shockingly, she was unhappy. She didn't want to do any of that. She wanted you to take control, she wanted you to deny her if it wasn't the right time, she wanted YOU to have a plan and make her feel secure. Instead she felt helpless as she now leading the relationship. She wanted to feel small and cared for. giving a woman exac…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 05:02 AM
4

All wives emotionally abuse. A woman's MAIN tactic is to get in YOUR head, what they would consider emotional abuse if you were to do this to them. In most cases SHE will accuse YOU of emotional abuse. Understand they cannot help it. They are emotions first, reality second, logic last. This does not change with age until very late in life after menopause. If you do not develop the ability to see this when its happening and for what it is you are going to experience this again and again, woman af…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 04:53 AM
6

It's no different than a child wanting the junk toy when you're trying to explain the better option is the same price. There's simply no critical thought it will always be about justifying behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/24 02:09 PM
12

If its a gay divorce then I assume youre both fucked by proxy. The man gets all the blame and all the responsibility so I guess it will be just as bad for him if that makes you feel any better. I have no idea how these situations play out or if there are kids involved, but whoever is claiming the "mommy" role will likely be the most vindictive and dishonest and also rewarded for that behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/23 07:47 PM
8

With no kids yea. It was for nothing but to feed her ego and compulsion. She did nothing, learned nothing, demanded everything. Never was able to show respect. At that moment I knew I married a shell, not a person.
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/23 03:33 AM
13

Nothingburger meant to get a reaction from you she can use. Move on. No woman has self control
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/23 01:28 AM
7

It is. Once you understand they don't respect you they can't try to fake they care. Understand she will never ever care for you no matter what she says. If she offers an olive branch it's to keep you on the hook while she spreads her legs for random guys. I understand not wanting to admit it. I've been there along time. My marriage was over 9 years before I had to admit the truth.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/23 06:01 PM
1

I don't have any friends. It's fucking hard. I don't have any close family either. I just go through the motions everyday and try not to think about my lot in life and that i married a monster. I do have my dog who will never leave my side. A true friend.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/23 02:44 PM
2

The worst part was: Married to a zombie that will never ever EVER show she ever cared about a single bone in your body until you leave her.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/23 04:17 AM
6

Only way to think. Never. EVER. Under ANY circumstances loose that mindset. If you do the same problems will return. Proud of you
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 11:13 PM
1

I think you got it the wrong way around. Women perceive you as disposable flesh. What do men want? Usually just one beautiful, kind, feminine woman. That's it for most men. Most women however want much much more than that they want a LIFE. Why are what is it 80% of divorces initiated by women? Women tell me it's because men cheat. However 80% of women admit to cheating or have cheated. Correlation? She's always got her eye on something else instead of working towards making something better in h…
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 05:37 PM
1

Understandable and thought out response. Women are temporary. Everyone here knows this and has first hand evidence. To make something work it requires effort. The current social structure gives women no incentive to put forth said effort. The reward actually comes in the opposite. 80% of women cheat or have cheated. According to the "latest" surveys. I think it's a pretty fair argument that women eat dicks on the regular. The Point is to understand she is always ready to eat a different dick. Sh…
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 05:20 PM
3

Only a matter of time until it's shut down for bigotry and toxic masculinity. They can sur down whatever they want but they ain't altering DNA. A man will be a man no matter how long you hold his head underwater. The longer this bullshit goes on the more just the revolution will be.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 01:44 PM
2

I disagree. I'm not himogenizing all women but rather speaking from a DNA standpoint. You can deny until you doubt your own reality again and that's fine. You'll be back reading it again.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 01:39 PM
2

Never get valet my bro.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 01:37 PM
4

Yes sir. They want a strong leader who they will constantly test in an attempt to take them down a peg. It's all a game to see if you're REALLY a leader. In the end it's about frame. Not caring at all, the willingness to burn it all down if you're not happy and satisfied is the only power you have.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 01:37 PM
2

It is and I'm not necessarily proud. I guess it's a thing from being single so long and trying to show others here that you're capable of getting females attn. It's cringe. I did it in attempt to relate with a brother who has not yet made the mistake we did.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 01:34 PM
1

You're fucked. Just have a kid with someone you know can work for themselves. You're not going to have a family unless it's an immigrant or foreign woman with values.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 06:07 AM
5

If I had anyone to tell me this 10 years ago I'm 45 now. Never ever have children with a woman if you're married. The only way for you to ensure you can be a good father is not get married. You don't control those kids future she does and there's no sense in having her rip them from you at 5 6 9 years old fuxking their life up. She will use them against you in anyway possible but you know this. If you must have children knock up a nice girlfriend but do not marry. After a kid She will eventually…
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 06:05 AM
1

Lmao
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 05:57 AM
1

I already do. I'm proud of myself. I was just saying the possibility of having sex with someone who enjoys it and wants me is some good motivation to keep putting the work in.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/23 06:43 PM
6

I just want to get laid again. Or at least have the possibility of regualr sex.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/23 12:44 AM
2

LMAO all i did was make the mistake of getting married. I already live this life and always have. I just feel now that ill never be content unless I'm not married. Ill give her up to be single and not worry about my future. To repeat myself: I'm the one thinking of initiating divorce just because I don't find marriage beneficial to me. I'm coping with the mistake I made after NEVER letting a woman take control of my future. For some reason I thought my separate accounts, my separate 401k etc...w…
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 01:04 AM
0

this is fucking sad man, get ahold of yourself. you lived for a pussy instead of yourself
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 01:02 AM
1

Permanent legal separation and we can stay together. How could that work?
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 09:20 PM
2

This whole thing just LMAO
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 09:15 PM
1

Of course
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 09:14 PM
1

LMAO we didnt have anything dude. No home, I made shit, I've 6x my salary in 8 years , house in my name etc...now im valuable. A prenump simp, is to hold on to your wealth from before the marriage. A prenump to hold onto my 6k in equity on my civic? Cause thats what I had.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 09:11 PM
1

Doubling my current salary would take a very long time and lot of luck. It could be done but its at least a 10yr process to get over 200k
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 09:07 PM
1

She works and makes 70% of what I do. It doesn't matter she gets 50% of mine so its a 30% gain for her and 50% loss for me. And nobody. NO HUMAN EXCEPT MY MOTHER AND DUAGHTER justifies getting 50% of my salary.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 09:05 PM
1

Postnup is my idea but I doubt it will even hold up in court since Pre doesn't seem to matter anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 09:02 PM
1

I don't have any assets. I have not a single asset except for a home with 25% equity. I just have savings and I will continue to have more and some investments. And If I stay married to ANYONE its just asking someone to steal it from me. How can any man live like this? Knowing this? I'm literally about to have a panic attack, I have no reason to move fwd in life if I'm married, to ANYONE. My wife and I could work it out, she knows i know it were both just stubborn. But i don't want to live in FE…
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 03:16 AM
5

IDGAF who she loves or if she loves me at all. She can feel however she wants but I will not tolerate a thief.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 02:43 AM
5

I have no debt except for the house and car. I spent 30k paying it all off in the last 2 years, also paid off hers. However my checking acct balance and 401k balance she is entitled to 50% of that and that's all I have. And that MY acct not a joint acct, it doesnt matter its 50% of everything I have....PERIOD. Shell fight to sell the house and ill never be able to own another house but I'll likely move down south to very rural town and rent very cheap. So I get the point about positive cash flow…
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 02:42 AM
3

Weve been speaking about or having the conversation for 4 years every couple months. She hasn't seen a lawyer if she had Id be served. Trust me on this its nothing knew its just the threat thats been thrown around BUT I know its coming eventually she wants it to be me so she can claim victim. I have spoken to several lawyers in the past few years but free consultation meaning they dont tell you shit. As far as financial institutions that's what lawyers are for. In the US your SSN will find any a…
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 02:35 AM
6

Put money where? Withdrawl cash and bury it? Wont they question my cash withdrawls every month for years? Thing is I want to work on it and I love her. But after realizing all this and not being able to save for retirement I'm ACTIVELY fucking myself over and PROHIBITING myself an actual chance at retirement. I know all circumstances and divorces are different but its always at least 50% right? What about postnuptial agreements?
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/23 02:22 AM
-2

We all do. If you want children the key is to NOT get married. You can get 50/50, save foe the court costs in advance when you know you're going to have a child if its a surprise, start saving immediately. Some child support is cheaper than raising the kids with her and paying for her entitlement and eventually giving her half of things she never contributed to. It will REALLY come out even 50/50 only if you DONT marry. I guess this applies to the non married boys out there. But yes once you get…
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/23 03:51 PM
1

God marriage is just a piece of shit. I have to kill myself at 70 since I'll not have money to live and no retirement.
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/23 06:40 AM
0

LMAO shit mindset but relative
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 01:32 AM
0

This will likely happen and you will be all the better for it
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 01:31 AM
5

Trust me and be happy. I got a vasectomy just to protect myself from having a kid with my wife. I knew the person she was and I gave up my future of having more children just to make sure Id have the possibility of a decent life/clean break ( there isnt one). That being said I was back and forth on the subject of me wanting another so it made it a little easier. Id be lying now if i said i didn't want a son. I made my choices, i made the choice to spend that time with a venomous woman who only w…
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 01:29 AM
1

Another one who has finally come to understand marriage was outdated in 1975.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 01:09 AM
0

Look at your faults. You have them. Dont have to marry but it doesn't mean you cant be happy
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 01:08 AM
2

That it burns hotter than before and reminds me that this was it a good idea. Some bros have to learn 3-4 times before it sticks
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 01:07 AM
5

I'll rebound the shit out of whatever but if I catch feelings its over. Nothing will distract me from my ultimate goal. I'll discuss marriage day 1 and the answer is no. If she cares about you this wouldn't matter, they know its leverage for them. If a woman is dependent on her leverage in the relationship she is not worth my time. If the goal is equality what does marriage have to do with anything? Period. Call it selfish call it immature call it what you want. There simply is NO BENIFIT. Know …
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 01:04 AM
1

But what did you love about being married? The ability to use the term "wife"? What do you think made you happier? With all respect that something you were trying to find happiness in instead of creating your own. Everything in "marriage" can be accomplished without it with less stress and worry. Unless youre involving children which my state you have ZERO rights to the child unless married. Even with your sig on the BC, child support etc.. I knocked a woman up, was there at delivery, signed the…
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 12:59 AM
2

Never. Nothing. Unless she is incredibly wealthy I have no understanding how it could possibly benefit you. They can kill you (pull the plug) they offer nothing in marriage and it makes no logical sense. Never, it will never even be considered and I'd leave a woman that day if it was her dealbreaker regardless of attraction, situation etc...I've left them for a lot less. I'm simply out to live my as I planned and achieve the peace I've worked for.. Nobody will control me, I will follow the path …
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/23 12:42 AM
1

Cash?
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/23 08:51 PM
1

Online credit union or online only bank.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/23 12:16 AM
-1

The credit card in her name only is his debt and vice versa? I thought it was only accounts where both parties signed.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/23 11:53 PM
1

Its very hard to keep keto and lift heavy. Yes it can be done, most severely struggle. Keto worked too well for weight loss but I now dial in some complex carbs with dinner and maybe a 1/2 -whole banana before workout. Still certainly under100g maybe 75g a day and working well. To each their own. I suspect your wife is successful as most women don't lift for hypertrophy. Feel free to correct me if Im wrong or give pointers.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/01/23 09:33 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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