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BirdMedication Archive

View 0 posts and 1,477 comments by BirdMedication on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Teasing would be opening the jar and putting it on the top shelf
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 06:52 AM

Lol well that was out of your control so it's not specifically your fault looking back At least you had high school?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 06:46 AM

How do you think the generation that missed out on the in-person college experience during COVID must feel Mogged by a virus
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 06:36 AM

Maybe so, I just think attraction fades later than you think And even after the initial passionate love/infatuation/attraction fades, people can still stay together out of companionate love and a lifelong commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 12:49 AM

It doesn't matter how attractive a woman is, the minute she shows interest in a man, this man loses at least a percentage of his attraction to her. You're implying that the moment the chase is over the man loses "some" of his interest. So yes, a "morning of" analogy would be fair IMO. Plus you're also implying that this mythical pre-relationship period of time is even more exciting than the initial "honeymoon" stage of the actual relationship. Again I disagree, I would attribute that drop in "ex…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 12:32 AM

Interesting theory but I disagree. If you've been waiting one year to go on your dream vacation or get a restaurant reservation or attend your favorite artist's concert, and then eventually that day arrives, would you suddenly change your mind the morning of and say "screw it I was looking forward to this but now I don't want to go"? That seems totally nonsensical to me. There's a cliche that "people want what they can't have" but there's also a saying that goes "a bird in the hand is worth two …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 11:56 PM

How is your posture? Anterior pelvic tilt can exacerbate the appearance of a belly even if you have lower body fat
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 06:04 PM

All the fake sugar soft drinks taste weird to me
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 05:38 PM

Possibly but I doubt it, it seems to be more about coming of age (which is a common theme) and impostor syndrome (pretending to be a grown up). Also most of the comments are about the aesthetic and how beautiful and stylish and talented the members are, no real discussion about social issues if that was the point. That would be too risky a topic for a Japanese pop song IMO
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 05:02 PM

The purple pill is overlooked
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 04:36 PM

resource gathering Life is an RTS game
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 05:33 PM

I don't know about Vietnam, but the left (and feminism) in Japan has pretty much been a non-entity since the 70s. There's too much inertia from the ruling conservative party (LDP) enjoying a near-monopoly for any kind of opposition to coalesce, and people's lives are comparatively better than the rest of the developed world. And it's not just lack of political power, there's a lot of apathy towards the idea of modern feminism among Japanese women, to the extent that many actually say things like…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 04:49 PM

Sorry to hear that... Luckily for you cats are very skilled at making biscuits!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/23 12:27 AM

That's because friend groups are NOT random samples of the population (for either side in this debate), even if people think that they "randomly" make new friends. CS is pretty heavily male-dominated and tends to attract a certain personality type so it's possible there's a different dynamic there. Then again the people who claim "every 'average' guy in my friend group has no problems with women" might also be speaking from a bubble in the sense that charming/attractive people tend to congregate…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 08:35 PM

In some alternate dimension where being mildly sexist against men would actually guarantee the end of extreme sexism against women? Sure I would pick mild sexism against men, from a utilitarian standpoint. But that's easier for my moral conscience to admit because I am volunteering as a man after all.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 07:58 PM

Any kind of dance or fitness class? But you have to actually kind of enjoy doing the thing for it to be sustainable
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 07:33 PM

Nursing
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 07:15 PM
1

Disagree, that's kind of a common logical fallacy. Just because you're the same age as someone doesn't mean you've had similar life experiences. Type or quantity wise. You gain life experience from actually going out and learning new things and experiencing life, not from celebrating birthdays or repeating the same home-work-home daily schedule with little change. To use a work analogy, it's the difference between 5 years of work experience versus one year of experience done five times over. Lif…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 07:00 PM
1

Well a billionaire would probably outcompete the average guy 9 times out of 10, but they're still competing with each other a lot of the time
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 06:53 PM
1

We're not talking about a guy who could be a model You can't exclude "models" if you're trying to make the point that social skills are more important than looks. Because the reality is that different woman each have a different threshold for which a guy is hot enough to her that she doesn't care what comes out of his mouth. Looks are subjective to the individual so being "hot enough to get away with anything" is subjective.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 06:17 PM
2

I think both steams from the anger that somehow the Gender Traitor (the childless man marrying a mother, the young woman marrying 10+ older) is messing up their market by selling themselves for what they consider 'discount price'. Great point, the Gender Traitor phenomenon is the reason that terms like "pickmes" have proliferated in dating discourse. The politicization of our culture has really segregated people into opposing camps. Sure, dating has always been competitive in a way but not to th…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 06:11 PM
1

There's a power dynamic ...if the 35 year old single mother is the boss at a company that the man works at ...if the 35 year old single mother has more money than the man ...if the 35 year old single mother has more relationship and life experience than the man (which you'd expect if the man has never had children) There's a lot of potential power dynamics, it's just easier for people to ignore the ones that aren't neatly quantifiable with a simple number
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 05:59 PM
1

Also he'd have to be into you in the first place for that to even happen, so you're still relying on chance instead of going after what you want
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 10:31 PM
2

Then that would also work in your favor too I guess. But that's assuming he didn't actually notice you before you noticed him lol
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 10:28 PM
2

If a guy notices you before you notice him at a party let's say, then he has time to "act" differently by fixing his posture and his appearance, sucking in his belly, faking a confident voice, telling embellished stories to make himself seem cool, etc. OTOH if you notice him first before he's onto you then you can observe him silently and find out the baseline of what he normally looks like and acts like. So he's already "locked in" and committed to the persona he's broadcast and the details of …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 10:21 PM
0

A woman making the first move allows her to see the guy's honest self more easily because he wasn't expecting the interaction so he doesn't have time to "prepare" his appearance or his demeanor. It's harder for a guy to fake a persona when he's caught off guard and reacting in split-second real time, than if he had time to "rehearse" a witty pickup line and conversational topics beforehand by planning and making the first move.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 10:05 PM
0

You're shifting the goalposts from deception to lack of courage. If anything a woman making the first move allows her to see the guy's honest self because he wasn't expecting the interaction so he doesn't have time to "prepare" his appearance or his demeanor. It's harder for people to fake a persona when they're reacting in split-second real time, than if they had time to "rehearse" a witty pickup line beforehand.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 10:02 PM
2

The main reason why women should never make the first move is even if the man is not interested in you in the slightest he will still most likely entertain you for an easy hook up If I'm not attracted to a woman then her making the first move is not going to change that Also the biggest logical flaw to your theory is that players are precisely the type of guys who are going to approach women. If you're going to generalize then that's the more reasonable assumption to make. What phone scammer wai…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 09:49 PM

I mean it seems obvious that the point here is about her hypocrisy, not "attractive guys are attractive." Changing your mind is fine but when you complain about men only wanting superficial things then you pretty much open yourself up to criticism when you go against your principles after criticizing others
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 06:08 PM

I guess that depends on what you'd consider average looking, and socially charming
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 06:03 PM

Eh you might be oversimplifying it a bit, sure the office hot phenomenon is a thing but just because they work with you doesn't mean they'll significantly lower their standards for you, especially if there's constant turnover Otherwise if it were that easy then guys would have a "line cook phase" and people would stop talking about leagues like it's an extraordinary feat to shoot out of yours
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 05:59 PM

Wouldn't average women be easier to deal with if they're not the ones "playing games" though?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 04:32 PM

Not necessarily. A lot of attractive women who know they're attractive don't feel like they have as much to prove as average women, so they won't fixate on dating equally attractive men for the sake of showing off their status. And they've already been there and done that in terms of the hot guy experience, so there's no point in arm candy because it's not novel anymore. In fact even many average women prefer dating guys who are less attractive than they are so they don't get outshined in terms …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 04:13 PM
0

They're still different enough. It's hard to showcase your personality on a dating app, plus some people just look better in person than in a photo.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 10:44 PM
8

I don't need to demand individual names to know that fat shaming and slut shaming are societal stigmas that women suffer from. Same idea here.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:51 AM
2

Which one of these is going to go down better: It doesn't matter how nicely you verbalize your preferences, people are going to criticize you for them Also not all criticism is equally valid, so pushing back against criticism is necessary as well
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:45 AM
10

Peer pressure and social shaming exist and inhibit people's behavior, it would be unreasonable to expect human beings to be completely stoic in the face of judgment
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:42 AM
0

Sure, if you're in imminent danger. The point is one shouldn't make a habit out of lying or ghosting during peacetime just because they'd be mildly inconvenienced. And also that logic would have to apply to any "suspicious" variable aside from the approaching party's gender. After all the woman's safety is paramount right?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 11:02 PM

Because they're in the 5% of course
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 09:28 PM
2

Unwanted solicitation can be annoying whether it’s men, Girlscouts, religious proselytizers, or men. The difference of course being that "men" is the only one in that list that is an immutable trait, but you probably knew that already given your hesitance to list more equivalent examples of groups it would be considered bigoted to "caution" against thousands of times more likely Sounds legit
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 07:04 PM
4

In which case, the solicitor is in no position to demand or expect a response which suits them. Again, that depends on the nature of the response, there is such a societally recognized thing as overreacting or being a Karen. Bigotry, for instance, is rarely acceptable in response to a perceived nuisance.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 06:33 PM
3

Attraction doesn't just magically become voluntary just because someone is picky or has no options. Both people in your examples have 2 legs to stand on.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 06:02 PM
2

Whether the person being inconvenienced decides it's an imposition is not very meaningful morally speaking, because clearly there are instances where that person's subjective bias or bigotry can frame an innocent encounter as a threatening imposition based on the race or gender of the one approaching them.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:57 PM
6

Yep this is the nuance people aren't really grasping. Dishonesty (and even bigotry) are very unfortunate strategies that are unacceptable in normal life but sometimes understandably employed...but only if you reasonably believe you're in a life-or-death situation. It's not carte blanche for women to start lying to men or for people to start avoiding minorities out of a habit of pattern recognition just because "it's better to be safe than sorry."
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:52 PM
1

Until that risk goes away, women have every right to give out fake numbers and false hope. Sure, if you need to extract yourself from a dangerous situation and you're never gonna see the guy again then absolutely. But it's not carte blanche for women to encourage a habit of ghosting or leading guys on out of mild annoyance or a "someone better just came along" mentality. Also that wouldn't have helped in this situation because again the guy was her classmate and would likely have been even more …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:42 PM
2

Because there's a fine line between self-protection and promoting defensive bigotry in the name of self-protection. All these arguments about men being "dangerous" as a class and therefore a monolith worthy of suspicion are perfectly morally analogous to arguments about minorities and immigrants being "dangerous" and promoting active vigilance against them
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:28 PM

If by objective you mean society's opinion then yes that's true, some guys overrate themselves. But it's not like "celebrity = model" (unless they're a model), there are a lot of ordinary looking celebrities.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:12 AM

but we don’t talk about reddit men literally rating hot women and celebrities 4-6 Depends on the celebrity, some of them are overrated and some them are accurately rated from the guy's POV Attractiveness is subjective after all
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 03:43 AM

Giraffe has left the chat
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 11:34 PM
1

Sure those are all concerns, and you can add in "life experience" too. But since we're talking about assumptions none of those factors are reliably correlated to age on an individual level, past adulthood at least.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 11:30 PM

There's like 10 different subs with some variation of "Am I wrong" People really seem to like this stuff but at this point I consider it a creative writing sub just with more political outrage
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 11:24 PM

Where's the melody :/
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 11:07 PM

Was also told that I know how to engage the right muscles "Nice mind-muscle connection brah!" Seriously though good job, the mental work is like half the battle
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 11:05 PM

I was gonna say "Can't build a family without a woman" in defense of women But then I realized how problematically that statement could be interpreted nowadays So how about "Women help build families and fill up empty houses"
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 10:45 PM
2

You kind of hinted at it in your other comment, but replacing "level" with "age" is the reason why all the age gap discourse feels so comically meaningless to me lol Put aside all the assumptions about the dude being sexist or manipulative. And of course there's no hard age limit on beauty. But why are guys "supposed" to be attracted to and date women their age? Because some stranger feels offended that they're not staying within their lane?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 10:35 PM
2

The best advice for someone who's not photogenic is to stop using online dating. It's not the end all be all
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/23 04:55 PM

Some men, certainly not all and probably not a majority
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/23 07:04 PM

F A K E C E P T I O N
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/23 06:45 PM

Did you link the wrong picture? All I see are coconuts in Barbados
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/23 05:52 PM
2

Different cultures can have different values so it's not entirely a superficial distinction
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/23 04:19 PM
2

IME it's also easier to guess age when you're evaluating people the same race as you instead of a different race, at least within slim enough margins of accuracy
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 10:16 PM
1

I think you'd have an easier time convincing people if you chose a picture of a 30 year old black or Asian dude lol The age detection algorithm seems to falter across race and ethnicity, in my experience
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 10:02 PM

For sure, there's less pressure upfront to make a hard decision and it feels less like an audition in many ways
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 08:07 PM

With regard to the pickiness aspect, matchmaking is kind of a twilight zone because it retains online dating dynamics except in real life. You're still treated more like "stats on paper" and there's a weird anticipation of perfection before meeting the other person, instead of running into them organically in a social situation and being more forgiving with flaws thanks to shared chemistry. So I'm not sure that the conclusions are broadly applicable to the average couple who meets offline in a "…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 07:56 PM
1

OK you're talking about online dating which is an entirely different and gender-imbalanced dynamic than meeting people in, well, real life
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 07:50 PM
2

Age gap relationships are incredibly common 39% of Americans have dated someone with an age gap of 10 years of more This from the 2022 Ipsos poll
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 07:43 PM
3

"Women never hit the wall" is just as sweeping a generalization as "women hit the wall at 25"
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 07:42 PM
2

Physically we all know that youthfulness makes anyone look better, why would an unattractive man look better when he's older? Weight loss/fitness transformation perhaps. Also guys with baby faces look more masculine once they lose the fat. Most guys are average looking, not unattractive. And it's not like a huge difference between 20s and 30s where you suddenly start looking like a senior citizen the second you turn 30. That's what people who believe in "the Wall" like to think.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 07:16 PM

They've both been historically disastrous, but communism is more insidious because everyone already knows "fascist" is a bad word
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 05:38 PM

It's possible that their friends are much more attractive than they are and the posts are a slightly coded rant about looks jealousy. Especially the one where the friend married the "insanely successful" doctor at a young age.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 05:29 PM

How much of "female money privilege" is just apex fallacy I wonder At least at the cushy 7 figure level
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 05:01 PM

Grapes-of-Wrath-pilled
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 04:59 PM

If you're approaching a woman who is already familiar with your social status then I'd say that's not really a cold approach. Unless you mean your friends are literally in the same room as you and they're gassing you up and she's witnessing all this, that would just be a typical cold approach with wingmen/wingwomen.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 04:54 PM
1

It's a two-sided coin. In principle you should be successful with at least your looksmatch, that would seem "fair" at least from a really crude analysis. Not on an individual level ("she's a 5 and so am I so I should be able to date her"), but on a population level you'd figure it should work out that way. The irony is that a lot of blue pillers will acknowledge that you're not entitled to or guaranteed to end up with your looksmatch, but then shame guys who have trouble attracting their looksma…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 12:10 AM

Lying about yourself on an anonymous site for the purpose of bragging always seemed funny to me
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 05:03 PM
5

Yes I'm sure you personally know every interracial and gay couple and how "cool they are" with not needing social acceptance lol Which makes your little story quite funny, if they don't care then why did you intervene on behalf of those gay men if you're so confident that they're not bothered by social criticism? They should just "suck it up" right?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 04:52 PM
1

Your anecdote just demonstrates there are people out there who publicly hate gay couples, it doesn't prove that people who publicly hate age gaps don't exist. I can say I've never personally witnessed a public outburst against a gay couple, but of course that wouldn't mean much if I tried to use that to make a generic claim about the state of LGBTQ acceptance nationwide.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/23 04:49 PM
1

I have agreed not all are bad in multiple comment responses on this very thread. Sure, but that just makes your "grow a thicker skin" victim blaming seem out of place. That’s a far cry from what people who criticize age gaps are talking about. Plenty of people criticize age gaps based on "I stopped reading at the ages, run girl!!!" level of critical thinking. Regardless if it's a positive or neutral post. And if OP describes it positively then they'll rarely believe them and say things like "You…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 07:29 PM
3

You can’t take off the color of your skin or choose the gender you are attracted to. You also can't change your age or choose the age of the next person you happen to meet and connect with. This isn't a difficult concept, attraction is involuntary. There’s a reason the bigger the gap the rates for divorce are astronomical. Because of the confounding factor of people confusing cause and effect. Age gap divorces often happen because of the stress of friends and family members judging without reaso…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 06:40 PM

because fat people make the dating market less competitive. But obesity affects both men and women, so to the extent that one would prefer a non-obese partner the dating market would stay equally competitive
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 06:10 PM
3

So by the same principle do you just stay silent when you encounter racist or homophobic people and instead tell their victims they should just grow a thicker skin when they do complain? I don't buy it Also age discrimination exists in the job market and in entertainment and generally in our culture, but I'm sure as a woman you already know full well about how ageism in society is real. Despite you seeming to downplay it for the sake of getting a "gotcha" in an age gap debate.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 06:01 PM
-1

The strength advantage alone should be concerning enough if one is consistent on the principle of minimizing risk. Physical danger is the number one fear that most women have universally, not some ambiguous fear of being mentally manipulated. The latter involves naivety that is more directly correlated with personality than age. And the "exacerbating" point would also work in my favor if I countered with "then it's fine for a woman to date a man twice her age as long as he's smaller than her. Th…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:57 PM

Ok yeah I guess it depends on how replaceable the job is for you then lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:52 PM

There's a difference between "talking to" and "positioning yourself for a potential romantic relationship with" I don't think OP is going to bother asking Reddit whether it's a good idea for him to make small talk about the weather with a female work colleague
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:49 PM

Are we talking about a "pre-career disposable fast food job that I couldn't care less about" type coworker or a "dream job white collar office environment" type coworker
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:46 PM
0

You totally misunderstood my point. I'm saying you have no way to tell on sight whether guys your age prefer younger women than you So shaming age gaps is still beneficial for you because it makes your job of vetting men you find attractive easier
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:40 PM
1

That's convenient justification after the fact. It's not like you can identify these guys on sight. Women often report that their biggest frustration is filtering and finding the right guy, so having to deal with guys your age who may or may not date younger women (without you knowing) is still a time sink for these women who may have had their hopes up at first that this guy was a keeper. So of course older women who claim they wouldn't date these guys anyway if they could read minds would stil…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:23 PM
1

Ex-act-ly lol Which makes the hyper-focus on the age gap related power imbalance alone seem very calculated and self-serving, because people only seem to care about imbalances that don't align with their dating preferences. No one hyperbolizes about height and strength imbalances between women and men to claim that any straight couple where the man is taller and more muscular than his gf should be seen as a "creepy red flag." If safety and protecting women is such a paramount issue then deflecti…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:12 PM
8

Do you feel the same about criticism of LGBTQ or interracial relationships? "They're not illegal so those couples should just get a thicker skin" It's a bit intellectually dishonest to simply reprimand the people being criticized and ignore the other half of the equation. The critics themselves also have a moral responsibility to be informed and nuanced in their criticism beyond "it's wrong because I think it's gross" type bigotry.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 05:06 PM
5

"Ho ho! Then come as close as you like ... so I can PEPPER SPRAY THE SHIT OUTTA YOU!!!"
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 11:48 PM
5

*militant feminist narcissism There are women who mean well when they say "be yourself" but they just don't understand the male perspective of having to deal with scarcity, in order to give specific and actionable advice in the first place
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 09:34 PM
10

"Oh? You're approaching me?" ​ (Sorry, couldn't resist)
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 09:24 PM
3

That's an interesting theory. So you're saying when these women give advice it's strategically tailored to help guys with the kinds of women they "should" be dating but not the advice giver themselves necessarily (who perceives themselves as being "above" them) I'm not sure that's universally the case as opposed to people just not caring enough to be specific, but I can see it applying in many situations
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 08:25 PM
2

Hookup culture is good for society, notice that now men care about self improvement more than anytime before Good observation about self-improvement, but wrong conclusion. That more suggests that marriage and wanting to find a life partner are good for society and the motivating force for young men. Hookup culture exacerbates single parenthood and family instability. Vs the alternative where monogamy is enforced and "everyone gets a wife/husband". Enforced monogamy is not arranged/forced marriag…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 05:14 PM

If being socially stunted or autistic is such a deal breaker according to PPD (more than your looks) then being a good looking guy and having no experience are not mutually exclusive, presumably
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 04:18 PM

I thought we were fine with virgins wanting other virgins. That makes sense to me morally, you're talking about odds which is a different issue
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 04:12 PM

The super great part of dating within social circle, is... you don't have to be as careful. You certainly still have to be careful. Except in different ways. When you date within a social circle you risk destroying the dynamic of that circle if your relationship goes badly, or if the rejection itself is awkward. With people you know there's no easy exit strategy for you or her (or your reputation) if things don't go smoothly.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/23 04:35 PM

No if you're claiming that every guy who approaches you has bad intentions then even if the assumption is true for guys on PPD it stops being true anywhere she steps foot outside of a Reddit meetup.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/23 07:54 PM

Well it's dating advice, not "how to date someone from PPD" advice
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/23 07:46 PM

Even if that assumption were true what good is giving advice that only applies to the members of a specific internet forum you also frequent, instead of a random sample of people you actually meet in real life? Makes no sense Beyond that it's just excusing bigotry and lack of critical thinking
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/23 06:12 PM
1

Do you always post something and then barely respond to the comments? Anyway there's a middle range between attractive and unattractive called "average" The point is that many average guys are surprised at how average women will often pick attractive men over their looksmatch on dating apps and such
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/23 07:04 PM

It's one of those default subs that shows up on the front page pretty regularly
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/23 06:20 PM

How about shave and shower raises? I've heard those are an equally effective alternative
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/23 05:52 PM

No but I did two sets of just be yourself crunches Incidentally people started giving me a lot of space in the gym
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/23 05:42 PM
2

People don't want to hurt feelings. "I said no because you're a cool person and we get along except I think you're too fat" doesn't exactly roll off the tongue
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 07:27 PM
1

What do you mean
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 07:17 PM
4

Well for all intents and purposes no does mean no, consent works in immediate time frames. If I'm unenthusiastic about someone that doesn't mean I won't change my mind years later, but that's irrelevant to the here and now.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 06:57 PM
3

Yeah I'm saying it's not always effective to waste your time hoping for one person to change their mind when you can use that mental energy to meet new people while you self-improve
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 06:51 PM
3

Practically speaking it's not healthy to have a mentality of sticking around with someone who rejected you just so you can have a glow up and prove them wrong, what matters is broadening your horizons and adopting an abundance mentality instead of focusing too much on individual rejections and results. A lot of dating situations aren't going to involve the luxury of spending close to enough time with a woman where she will wait patiently for you to reach the finish line.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 06:46 PM
1

I was responding to one of the top upvoted comments at the time, which was a generalization directed at men. There's no deflection because I already said it's wrong no matter which side does it. Also I've spoken up plenty of times in this sub against Red Pill generalizations about the Wall and certain RP content creators
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 07:22 PM
1

Okay, I never suggested that's a good mentality to have. Or that it's therefore somehow okay for women to generalize because "men do it too!" That's like a child asking their parent to break their sibling's toy because "it's not fair that they got to break mine!"
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 06:48 PM
1

Or maybe you have nothing to say because you have no rebuttal
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 06:17 PM
3

I would be more amenable to your point if you weren't also a massive hypocrite about refusing to be equally magnanimous and accepting towards men's age preferences for younger women Instead of compartmentalizing that in your mind as a distinctly manipulative and creepy phenomenon despite attraction being involuntary
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 05:58 PM
3

Whining about men not having empathy for women but then turning around to call men's issues "issues" I guess women with internet access are just whining about nothing because there are starving kids in Africa...if we're going to play the "your problems aren't real problems" game of relative privation Real good faith participant you are lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 05:42 PM
4

Most men are emotionally stunted have really shitty character Is there something about Reddit that encourages so many people to speak in generalities with unearned confidence
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 05:39 PM
4

Oof, work is the last place I'd expect a feminist to recommend. This sounds more like boomer dating advice instead of something that Gen Z or the modern left would approve of lol It violates all the avoiding-creepiness-rules of "giving the woman an exit strategy" and "not hitting on women where they have to be nice to you." (Like hitting on cashiers, waitress, except much more awkward and the consequences are irreversible because you also work there.) Now if you're talking about a throwaway summ…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 01:37 AM

"Aww man she already thinks I'm boring three dates in!"
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 08:21 PM

Well that's the thing, "hookup material" is considered a compliment to a lot of guys because it's the opposite where they think you're sexy and fun
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 08:03 PM

"Husband material" kind of implies that you're dependable but boring, like half a step above "dad material"
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 08:00 PM

Yeah that's my biggest gripe with Red Pill content creator logic You can't preach about self-discipline in exhorting young men to better themselves. But then claim once you're successful that you should be allowed to screw around on your woman because "I'm just wired this way." Also the thing about high-value men providing stability but then endangering the stability of your family life by going out and cheating
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 05:58 PM

She could pretend like she's talking to her boys, or presenting at a public seminar Anything besides speaking to a specific kind of audience in an environment like TikTok where being combative and edgy gets you more attention
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 12:33 AM

I agree that toxic masculinity is harmful but she picked the worst way to express that message. She's trying to address male issues while still getting in a revenge jab at the same time, which just makes her appear petty and two-faced. If you're going to opine about male suicide then maybe don't make the tasteless joke and then double down on it without really apologizing.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/23 12:19 AM

"A society that is created and run by men is not beneficial to you, it's not beneficial to me or anyone" If society is "run by men" then mothers can't possibly be truly responsible for encouraging toxic masculinity because they're only teaching what they've internalized from the patriarchy /s Her whole spiel is preachy, victim blamey, and sets up a clear dichotomy between feminine (empathy, compassion, love) and masculine (angry, horny). She frames those traits as societal stereotypes, but she k…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 11:59 PM

Kinda ruined the sincerity of her message by leading with the snarky bitch energy and the "smile more" joke so her supporters wouldn't think she was being "too nice" to men. That said message-wise she offers no alternative to the "society run by men" which she believes is bad. Is she suggesting one run by women (exclusively or in collaboration with men) would be inherently less toxic? Which leads to my next point... She ignores the fact that there are also women responsible for encouraging toxic…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 11:40 PM

Not an expert but he can and should do both at the same time Also exercise should ideally include cardio and strength training
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 10:21 PM
1

Well we've gotta decide one way or the other, is social media worth worrying about? I mean Andrew Tate and the Red Pill is technically "not real life" right? Or is social media actually big enough by this point where it's not just a self-contained and isolated box that doesn't bleed into people's unspoken thoughts and public actions?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 10:07 PM

Some say Barbie is a feminist movie but others say it's antifeminist I say the director is still a feminist but made the messaging as vague as possible to make money off of both sides
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 10:02 PM

Was there any physical evidence against him?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 08:48 PM
3

The entire point of inequality is that people are severely limited from "doing what they want" due to societal biases. Hence the historical need for feminism, anti-racism, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 06:43 PM
3

The main point is not whether the creator endorses the message of the rage bait, the point is the message is still being spread. There are people in the audience who will support it and spread it unironically. Also it doesn't take "neurodivergence" to call out shitty trends.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 06:22 PM
2

Thing is you're mostly comparing with single people your age, not with the entire adult/married population. So "people of Walmart" is going to give you a false sense of security with regard to your competition, who will probably not be riding around in mobility scooters.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 06:37 AM
1

Lol plenty of Hollywood movies have roles for normal looking people, otherwise the cinematic world would look really odd because everyone would be equally hot Even Barbie has actors in it who aren't considered conventionally attractive at all
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 06:16 AM
1

There are plenty of average looking and even unattractive Hollywood actors. Normal people exist in movies too lol
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 05:08 AM
4

Are you sure you're not the troll lol
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 05:04 AM
11

With the exception of the second one where it's more obvious he's in on the joke, these kinds of things just incentivize the toxic masculinity mindset that they would probably complain about at the same time Also you can tell they're trying to play the "I'm just joking but not really" ambiguity game, because if they didn't believe the jokes were like 50% true then 40K people wouldn't all find it funny by chance
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 12:07 AM
3

"Forced" is kind of a meaningless term though. No one is holding anyone at gunpoint, but people do shame others for attempting to pursue people "out of their league" and not "staying in their lane." Which is where the objections understandably arise. Often they only begrudgingly retract their judgment after the couple in question has proven them wrong first, if at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 11:35 PM

I think the utter confusion on Japanese Twitter when Americans actually laughed along with them instead of getting offended by the revenge Bin Laden memes (payback for the Barbenheimer marketing fiasco) really put into perspective how weird it is to the rest of world that the US so casually makes fun of their own national tragedies
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 05:05 PM

Depends on the woman, i's a personal preference as well as a cultural thing. There is also the phenomenon of beardfishing that some women on Reddit seem especially concerned about
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 04:52 PM

Some people's loneliness is a problem of their own making Not exactly, social ostracism and bullying are disincentivizing and something you have no control over. Social skills are the one type of skill where improvement actually requires cooperation from an eager third party beyond the skill learner's own hard work
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 04:38 PM
1

My personal theory is that preselection bias only works if the woman doing the observing considers the woman who did the preselecting equally or more attractive than herself. In other words, his woman's "league" matters. Also being married doesn't seem like anything special preselection-wise because it's so incredibly common, it's more about the quality of the married guy himself
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 10:35 PM

Oh ok I didn't know my bad
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 07:16 PM

Ever since you posted that food pic with the maggots(?) in it I've been kind of skeptical sorry lol
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 07:08 PM
1

That one and the "first date gave me the ick the way he asked the waiter for the check" one crack me up
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 08:52 PM
1

I love that SpongeBob is still culturally relevant and an endless wellspring of memes
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 08:48 PM
2

Cho just seems to me like he's naturally reserved and not very talkative, and all about the music But yeah with the uber virtuoso types there are some who really do give off that tortured genius thing where they'd rather just play you something impressive to get you to stop asking them questions
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 08:45 PM
2

10/10 finger dexterity 10/10 musical sensitivity goes without saying
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 08:09 PM
2

It's kinda funny how the popularity of being a musician depends on the specific instrument. You gotta play something modern and cool like drums and guitar for maximum mainstream appeal
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 08:06 PM
2

Cool dude! Was pleasantly surprised to witness his progression from humble Youtube beginnings to just showing up at the Chopin Competition one day lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 08:03 PM
1

You know that wasn't the point
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 06:18 PM
4

Except according to OP her behavior had persisted for a week. So clearly his repeated "comfort and support" wasn't doing anything for her in lieu of an actual solution.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 05:21 PM
1

How do males with tons of options still end up picking the wrong woman I like how you can instantly tell who said that just from the way they said it
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 04:57 PM
7

Hey Reddit is it toxic for a man to not ask his gf before...*checks notes*...brainstorming ideas? I swear that sub is full of women whose favorite pastime seems to be taking the least charitable interpretation of anything a man does
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/23 04:53 PM
2

You're drawing the wrong logical conclusions from your data. Just because successful men marry women with college degrees and white collar jobs doesn't mean they care about the career as a first priority. It could very well be that those women met their looks standards first and also happened to be professionals. Having a college degree isn't rare if you're a woman anyways so I wouldn't take that as evidence of prioritizing a woman's earning potential.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 11:59 PM
1

I'm not referring to his open relationship, I'm talking about him ostensibly using his fame and his platform to hook up with younger and less well-known female content creators. Including Melina when they first met. Now that's not something I would personally jump to the conclusion of being "exploitative" without evidence, I have a pretty liberal stance on celebrities dating normies and age gaps. But according to some of his own criticisms of red pill it absolutely should make him suspicious of …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 08:48 PM
3

On the topic of dating specifically, he talks about certain red pill strategies being exploitative by using power and influence to one's benefit, but ignores the power dynamics present in his own relationships (with Melina and his female "orbiters") that would lead an observer to make the same negative assumptions based on the terrible optics.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 08:32 PM
2

Destiny strikes me as being an opportunist and kind of hypocritical with his principles. That said his debates with his opponents are certainly interesting to watch
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 08:16 PM
0

If looks are subjective then how can someone be delusional for underrating but not for overrating?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 08:15 PM
5

Men and women both want a small percentage of the opposite gender as the ideal. But they're also happy with a partner who might not fit the ideal. Hence a rather generous range of 25 to 35. By analogy I'd have no problem with a woman my height saying that her preferred height range starts at a minimum that's already taller than me. I'd be disappointed, sure, but she's allowed her preference. You can't control attraction for the most part because it's involuntary.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 06:05 PM
2

This I think is the real meaning behind the phrase "Ask the fisherman, not the fish." It's not so much that the fish don't know how to catch themselves, it's that they have no incentive to help you catch them more efficiently.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 05:57 PM
4

In today's episode: women okay with their own height discrepancy preferences calling men with age discrepancy preferences neckbeards for not "staying in their lane" "Progressive" my ass lol
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 05:44 PM
5

Yes that's why I say it depends on the type of advice. Professional advice about building a patio? Knowledge of structural engineering can be scientifically proven and statements are easily falsifiable. Professional person with moderate experience in dating's advice about what groups or types of men to avoid dating? Veers into bigotry and unfounded stereotyping based on over-valuing personal anecdotes and very little statistical evidence Sociological topics deal with human beings, who as we all …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 09:54 PM
-1

It would be wrong to assume that the majority of criticism comes from that one demographic without evidence, but it's absolutely the case that people will strategically shame certain couples that they feel are a competitive threat to their dating pool. You see this with racists who shame other men "stealing women of their race" like you do with older women (not all of them) who shame men their age and younger women for "not staying in their lane" by dating each other. That's just human nature, n…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 09:46 PM
3

Bad example because living in africa isnt realistic wat
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 08:05 PM
7

Fallacy of relative privation "As long as there are starving kids in Africa then 100% of people asking for advice on Reddit are just whiny first-worlders" Including guys with one leg, having both legs is not a need.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 07:57 PM
7

Depends on the woman and the advice. Unfortunately there are women who can't resist projecting and overgeneralizing about entire groups of men when they give advice, because of a bad personal experience with individual men from said groups. There's a lot of profiling and anecdotal smugness that goes on in relationship advice threads.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 07:22 PM
3

You can be vague and omit details without outright lying. Saying something like "I do pretty well for myself" is often interpreted as male bravado on a first date anyways so it lets you camouflage your net worth indirectly.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 06:17 PM
2

Well that's the tradeoff, if you want to enjoy the dating benefits of signaling to women that "I'm rich" then you can't run your experiment at the same time because the "control" conditions are unacceptable to you. I guess the only way to know with more certainty while maintaining your outwardly wealthy lifestyle would be to date a woman who's equally rich or has more money than you, but even that's not a guarantee because people with money don't always stop wanting more.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 06:07 PM
3

If you are a rich man, you cannot really know if she is there for the money. You can just not display your wealth lol At least in the early stages until you know she likes you for you It's easier for a rich guy to live a modest lifestyle or pretend to not be rich, than it is for an attractive woman to pretend to be ugly
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 05:56 PM
1

I'd say even if you're confident the average person will think you're cringe if your confidence is not expressed in a manner or in an interest that's considered socially "cool" and acceptable
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 05:26 PM
1

Well because social skills improvement is mostly about actual repeated practice and execution instead of just theory. And sometimes you need a "buddy" or a coach to keep you accountable and provide emotional support, like a gym buddy except with more feedback involved Same with learning an instrument or a sport, you can watch Youtube videos but having someone teach you is way more effective
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 08:31 PM
1

Hold up. No one said anything about advantages OR disadvantages. OK so what's the specific context of you mentioning people in their 20s being broke and attractive in a discussion forum? Was that just an unprompted and neutral observation? Seems like you were taking issue with an opinion that someone else had regarding being young and having certain advantages/disadvantages depending on gender ("but that's different!")
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 08:28 PM
1

Ok but that doesn’t diminish that typically a young person in their 20s is probably broke and likely at an attractive place in their life. The idea of being in your 20s as an advantage in dating all depends on whether your level of your attractiveness exceeds your level of broke. But yes, that's generally the case with regard to relative brokeness and relative attractiveness.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 08:04 PM
1

Yeah I agree, the criticism should be directed at the scammy business aspect but not the actual content necessarily. Or the guy for actually making an effort to seek the closest equivalent of professional dating help.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 08:01 PM
1

The value of youth and attractiveness is probably true for both, but the general consensus is that women care more about stability and that men can more easily compensate for lack of youth or attractiveness by being financially stable. Or with other factors like sense of humor, confidence/leadership, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 07:51 PM
4

To be clear I disagree with some of the more incendiary RP takes. That said, dating coaches get a lot of shit but as long as their critics keep criticizing without offering viable alternatives then these coaches are just fulfilling a market need. Incidentally I find it odd that a lot of the people who think men are weird for refusing to go to therapy to address mental health issues then turn around and mock them for taking initiative and enlisting the help of a dating coach to address dating iss…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 07:49 PM
2

Is it that unbelievable that men and women might generally find different things attractive in the opposite sex? Average woman is around 5'4" "You know there are good guys who are also 5'4" Female height preference: "But that's different!!!"
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 07:37 PM
1

Unfortunately human beings have a tendency to judge other people, men and women, differently based on how they look. Pretty privilege is real. One the one hand, it sucks to be young and beautiful and then lose your beauty in old age. On the other hand, it also sucks to have never been considered beautiful, young or old. Honestly I don't know which is worse, seems like the grass is always greener on the other side
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 07:11 PM
17

Yeah it do be funny how the woman "getting her 💰" often excuses any concerns about power imbalance, male gaze, life stages, life experience, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 06:40 AM
3

Yeah the people you're talking about are actually consistent, but I'm pointing out the ones who aren't lol So if the disconnect doesn't make sense then that's the point, they're being hypocritical
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 05:56 AM
9

Sure, and I would respect that argument a lot more if the people who actually believed it were equally passionate about 24 year olds with undeveloped prefrontal cortexes being too immature to vote responsibly. And not getting offended when a man calls a 24 year old woman a "girl."
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 05:13 AM
4

That's kinda my point, you can call yourself whatever political label you want but at the end of the day it's meaningless if you're going to selectively go against your principles anyway when it comes to that one pet peeve issue you hate with a passion. Leave it to the "let people love who they love" and "don't treat stereotypes like they're true for all individuals" tolerant left to do exactly the opposite of what they preach when they shriek about age gaps...in the same black and white manner …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 05:10 AM
51

The whole "18 is a baby adult" thing just seems to me like liberals and progressives acting oddly selective about being morally conservative, but only on the age gap issue. Like you rarely see these people clutch their pearls or opine about the dangers of an 18 year old drinking in college with their buddies, in fact they might even make fun of you for choosing NOT to drink before 21 because "you're such a goody two shoes, like, live a little!" But then when the topic comes to dating or hooking …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 04:19 AM
6

A better analogy would be a situation where the people approaching you actually had something that you really wanted, but you had to sift through them to find that 1 in 20 who actually carried a version of the product to your exact liking and specifications. Also these people approach you politely and professionally, and you live in a society where for some reason it's frowned upon for you to approach them first or proactively go to a store to buy the product yourself .
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/23 11:48 PM

Oh I'm not saying they're less attractive because of it lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/23 02:46 AM

I don't know about the girl in the pic, but a lot of Korean celebrities have been known to get (really well done) plastic surgery. That said Asians do tend to age very well anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/23 02:33 AM
2

CMV: Women who play the harp are literal angels
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 10:00 PM

She might be able to find love if she were willing to sign an NDA with whatever guy she ends up dating next, pretty sure more dudes would be interested if they had assurances of not ending up in her next "Dear Firstname" hit song
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 09:00 PM

Her name always reminds me of a kid trying to pronounce Halle Berry
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 08:27 PM

Upvote for classical music which is awesome and shamefully underappreciated
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 08:22 PM

POC are always gonna have it worse as a group in dating
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 07:48 PM
5

To the extent that creepiness is often subjective, it will reduce the number of inexperienced/shy/awkward men without actual creep intentions from getting lumped into the "perceived creep" category due to skill issues. It takes the pressure of having to initiate off of those men, knowing that they live in a culture where the women are very forward and the roles reversed.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/23 09:25 PM
4

Yes that was my point, the numbers are wildly off
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/23 05:33 PM
1

About time
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/23 05:38 AM
37

Either take the shot and have a 50% chance Lol that's not how it works, just because "can i get yo number" is a yes or no question doesn't mean you have a 50% chance of success "Just ask out Margot Robbie 4 times bro!"
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/23 10:12 PM
4

Am I the only one who thinks Dillon Danis is the one looking more cringe from all of this?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/23 03:46 AM
4

Apparently pitbulls never got the memo, those bad bois be one time thinkers
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/23 03:43 AM
1

Isn't Greta Gerwig a feminist? I don't see why she would willingly alienate her tribe unless she was making fun of radical feminism from her safe liberal feminist position
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/23 02:53 AM
2

Sorry I meant approaching and interacting with strangers, not bothering them after they've already said no. You're not entitled to expect strangers to "never approach me."
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/23 12:24 AM
3

No you're not, we live in a society
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 11:45 PM
2

You're not wrong, but those compensating factors muddy the discussion about comparing men and women's looks standards alone. For instance, your social capital theory doesn't apply in a lot of situations. Like online dating and casual hookup type situations where, naturally, immediate judgment of your looks determines like 95% of the equation for success. And where saying something like "Oh I'm kind of a big deal in my small town" to a woman in a bar doesn't really mean squat if they're not from …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 11:09 PM
9

Because the average guy isn't Post Malone famous, so it's not really meaningful as an example to compare the genders. Women have the potential to look past your looks, but that's more of a "finish line" assessment that assumes that average guys start out with celebrity status.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 10:04 PM
13

Those women are attracted to Post Malone because he's Post Malone though, not necessarily because of his looks. You're adding in the fame/status variable that shouldn't be a part of this conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 09:18 PM
3

They're only 6% of the US population but then 18-25 men are also 6% of the population. So you're still dealing with low percentages anyway, unless like you seem to suggest people go for a partner from a different age group. But i doubt you would condone age gaps?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 05:14 AM
3

In conversation a lot of their comments start with "I". Brb, referring to self in third person like Smeagol from now on
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 10:53 PM
4

"Stop looking for love and it will find you" is a common platitude in dating discussions
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 03:27 AM
1

Oh I see, that makes sense too lol
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 03:18 AM
1

Honestly I would prefer a bum who could speak perfect English as long as they could read from a script or just transfer me to a manager lol Answering "I'm sorry I didn't understand what you just said" a thousand times is painfully aggravating
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 03:12 AM
5

I feel like companies hire customer service reps who couldn't speak intelligible English to save their own lives, just so customers will give up and stop complaining because they're literally unable to
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 02:59 AM
18

They're also both done by women, the point is that women are primarily the victims of the first and men the victims of the second.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 02:44 AM
31

IME female virgin shaming mostly happens among women (different women comparing their sexual history), as opposed to the comparatively less common inter-gender phenomenon of men actually mocking a woman because she has no experience. Of course it exists along with male slut shaming, but on a societal level men and women generally shame the other for being too sexually liberal and too sexually inexperienced, respectively.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 01:36 AM
42

Slut shaming is a double standard weaponized against women, but virgin shaming and lack of experience is a double standard weaponized against men. So from an eagle-eye view the double standards "cancel out" and neither gender is spared from judgment.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 01:14 AM
4

Yeah thinking that "autism = screwed" seems kind of oversimplistic and black-pilley to me
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 12:08 AM
4

Smart means having or showing a high degree of mental ability. Being smart doesn't guarantee you have social skills or charisma, at all. Also, high levels of self awareness are a sign of great intelligence, you’re dumb if you’re not very self aware and socially inept people are not very self aware: Self-awareness is often correlated with intelligence, but they're not the same and independent of each other. This is a huge generalization
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/23 07:24 PM
7

Being socially inept or lacking charisma doesn't make you're dumb. "Smart" is a specific trait related to intelligence. There's a difference between knowing and executing. I could be smart and know all the rules and best strategies for excelling at football, but if I'm weak and a poor runner then I won't be any good at football. That would just make me unathletic, not dumb.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/23 07:13 PM
1

Starting to look more and more like Black Myth Wukong isn't just vaporware and might actually be released Fingers crossed cause dayum this game looks SICK
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/23 05:06 AM
1

It's not really affection if they want something you have
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/23 02:44 AM
3

It's not just about how big they look, but also about how strong you assume they are compared to you. Manny Pacquiao isn't very tall and doesn't look intimidating outside of a boxing ring, but I'm sure there are a lot of bigger guys who would be afraid to start a fight with him if they were untrained and knew who he was.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 07:15 PM
8

They're trying to highlight the size difference/danger aspect, so a closer equivalent of women receiving unwanted attention from average men would be like short, skinny guys who are attracted to big women twice their size receiving unwanted attention from particular big women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 06:52 PM
2

Just because you want something doesn't mean you're able to get that thing, people often make do to survive or until they're in a better position to acquire what they want
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 06:18 PM
1

Lol it helps if you watch the episode
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 02:35 AM
1

I'm making fun of straight guys who act out borderline gay shit and then vehemently affirm that they're straight dudebros while mocking the target of said homophobic act Ex: guy who falls asleep first and gets dicks drawn on his face by totally straight buddies, guy who happens to be eating a banana, guy who dies first in a game and gets teabagged
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 02:21 AM
1

I agree, especially if that woman is your guy friend who you're totally platonic with and only does the teabag motion on your character's face because he's "bored"
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 02:11 AM
1

"Bro no homo, it's just a game"
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 02:03 AM
2

Yeah but that doesn't mean they don't recognize that they might be one Calling yourself alpha would be pretty immodest and cringe, so it's an L either way lol
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 01:39 AM
3

Beta bux isn't always an insult, it's like a normie calling themselves "broke" in a half-humorous, self-aware kind of way
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 01:36 AM
-1

Just because the deception is easier to uncover doesn't mean the intent was less manipulative. That's like saying your spouse cheating on you is more forgivable if they're a bad liar.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 10:09 PM
1

Angles that aren't too extreme are fine IMO because the camera lens distorts your face, and "old photos" is kind of subjective depending on how much you've actually visibly aged. But agreed on everything else in the list.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 09:48 PM
0

There are countless "who needs men anyways" threads on the internet that I think the genders are about even at this point
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 09:43 PM
1

And if you don't have wealth, height/looks, status, you won't be getting any attention from modern women. I think they mean that you won't stand out or get positive attention just by existing, unlike an attractive or ostentatious man. You have to take risks and jump through hoops to step out of "NPC invisibility" and convince women of your value. That said Fresh and Fit tend to overgeneralize in a lot of the statements they make, but they do have a point in saying that the average guy is likely …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 07:51 PM

I mean that average looking men with mild autism aren't necessarily shut out of the dating game, they might have a harder time with getting into and keeping an LTR though
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 06:50 PM

Even autism is a scale though, it can be mild or debilitating
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 06:40 PM
3

It's not where you are, it's who you are
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 06:18 PM

Yeah sure it was good, from a certain point of view
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 04:09 AM

somewhere around 6 facially The cheerleader effect is immediate so if even that doesn't work then they're probably not elite* \in my subjective opinion)
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 03:59 AM

What life tasks require physical strength that women don't have? Tasks like moving heavy things? I don't know why you're trying to argue physical equality on this point They can't carry rejection Lol good one, here's hoping you summon all your emotional strength to open a jar next time
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 03:41 AM

What exactly are modern men bringing to the table? I'm guessing they're the ones bringing the table, like actually carrying it How are they biologically capable of bringing something different than I can bring myself? They can perform tasks requiring physical strength. Unless you happen to be an elite female weightlifter or something
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 03:19 AM

Yes I said their current psychologist is giving uninformed and unhelpful dating advice and should stop giving dating advice. Because guess what, psychologists aren't trained to give dating advice either, at least not by prescribing rules or taking sides. So really you're just saying I'm less qualified than an expert on a topic neither of us have expertise in.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 07:40 PM

Telling someone that their doctor might be giving unhelpful or harmful advice is not telling them to do the exact opposite of what the doctor suggests, it's telling them to consider a second opinion (professional or otherwise). By your logic no one could ever rate their doctors or report ethical violations or give a recommendation based on their experience (for or against) because they're not themselves a doctor, which goes against common sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 07:26 PM

That's just appeal to authority fallacy. Just because someone is trained to be a doctor, for instance, doesn't mean they're a good doctor. Any one with experience as a patient knows this, with or without a medical degree.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 07:07 PM

It's almost like I'm leaving open the possibility of ignorance instead of malice. At best it's unhelpful, at worst it's strategic.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 06:59 PM

Your psychologist is giving you anti-anxiety advice and dating advice that are contradictory to each other. It seems like she has a conflict of interest because on the one hand she's supposed to help you overcome fear through exposure therapy and not care so much about what other people think, and yet on the other hand as a woman it seems like she wants you to do that on her terms and in a manner that's favorable to women in the dating game. She should not be giving dating advice, at least not w…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 06:49 PM

If your psychologist was giving you mechanisms to not be as anxious, or understand why you are anxious, and what is causing it, that would be valid. But it seems your psychologist is giving you dating advice, and not good advice either. Holy crap you're absolutely right That psychologist is giving OP anti-anxiety advice and dating advice that are contradictory to each other. It's almost like she has a conflict of interest because on the one hand she wants to help him not care so much about what …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 06:45 PM

I'd say of your able to talk to someone for longer than 15 minutes without them wanting to leave, then they're probably pretty okay with you giving them your number. Don't Wait til the very last second of you're interaction to give someone your number. There's pros and cons to this. If they're stuck with you on a flight or some other environment without an immediate exit strategy then it's better to wait until the end instead of making things awkward 15 minutes into a potentially several hour in…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 06:34 PM
15

because ultimately it just makes things worse for kids who had no say in any of it and need looking after. You're not wrong, but I don't think this is an argument you can honestly defend if you also happen to be pro-choice
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 06:05 PM
19

Just because a woman prefers a man with a full head of hair doesn't mean she'll divorce him when he starts going bald. Same with men and youthful looking women, even loyal people tend to choose the best they can get and hope they age well.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/23 05:51 PM
-3

Because there's a physical power imbalance that can be exploited by the taller and stronger man to abuse the woman Because men only prefer petite women since they know women their size won't put up with their BS
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/23 10:59 PM
0

Not showing a part of your body or using different angles isn't lying, it's more like an omission. But using makeup is misrepresenting yourself to a degree, at least as much as using a filter would be
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/23 05:29 PM
5

Make sure he takes his shoes off too so he can't sneak that extra inch on you!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/23 03:18 AM
5

Makes sense. Whenever I see a tall guy with a short girlfriend I always assume he specifically picked her so he could dominate her physically and that she had a measuring tape on her to make sure he was tall enough when they first met. Also whenever I see a mixed race couple I assume they have an unhealthy fetish for each other's race no matter what they say.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/23 02:26 AM
3

Thanks for reminding me I forgot about her! She was definitely one of the voices of reason on the most controversial topics here with her nuanced takes, and about as impartial a judge as I can think of.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/23 10:29 PM
5

Which still seems like a half-measure. The replacement rate is around 2.1 or 2.2
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/23 06:38 PM
8

Agreed, assuming the man is following common sense (no dark alleys, stalking), asking respectfully and taking no for an answer. In fact it's entitlement to expect men to make the first move and then stigmatize them for awkwardly doing the thing that you neither have the social obligation nor the need to get better at yourself but still benefit from. That's trying to have your cake and eat it too.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 09:47 PM

most of them just want a guy taller than them ...with heels on, and would still prefer the taller guy among two options, all other things being equal
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 09:32 PM

"Therefore all short guys must have the same rate of success as my anecdotal examples"
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 09:18 PM

Most girls have height requirements so yeah I'd imagine that'd be fairly upsetting
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 09:16 PM

Almost looks like odds vs. evens lol
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 08:52 PM

Exactly, voluntarily redoing the same task beyond the point of diminishing returns shouldn't count as the other person "not wanting to do an equal amount of work"
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 08:23 PM

He’s 5‘6 and over, but still insist that his height is the reason why women don’t like him. That's not an unreasonable assumption, 5'6 is below average height. Change that to 5'10 and you might have a point. The thing is a lot of women would already consider him low-tier at first glance anyway regardless of what he thought lol
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 08:03 PM

What gets ignored in the "calculate how many hours men and women do housework" conversation is that there are easier but more frequent chores and there are physically demanding, technical tasks that come up less often. The latter gets undervalued and contributes to the illusion that men don't pull their weight. Also if only one person is working then the chores shouldn't be divided 50/50
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 07:32 PM
4

Yeah I think it's a combination of factors: personal taste, cultural messaging, biological tendencies, etc. Of course the proportional influence of each factor is going to differ depending on the individual.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 02:36 AM
3

TRP's limitation is that it's fairly Western society-centric, so the details might differ in other countries' equivalent ideologies. But I'm sure if you look at the underlying behavioral principles they share a lot of commonalities. Guy makes first move, confidence is key, "bad boys" are more attractive, preselection can motivate women to try harder for your attention, etc. Even for K-pop guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 01:58 AM
17

I think the reality that some people are afraid to say is at a certain point on the (un)attractiveness scale, the best advice is just to no longer expect to find a relationship and plan on a life alone. People tend to prescribe dating advice with the average person in mind. So the average guy who works on career, fitness, and confidence over time is going to be in a better position at the end of that period of improvement. That's just the nature of what it means to improve. For any skill you wor…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 01:50 AM
4

I don't think biological preferences are completely discounted though, women in those countries still prefer men who are taller and stronger than themselves, just maybe not at the same standards as Western countries. Even in East Asia evo psych is still operative in relative terms, if not absolute terms.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 12:55 AM
33

Because sexual preferences have biological and cultural components to them. In countries like Japan most women hate beards on men because they look "unkempt" or "dirty." Also most Japanese women prefer thinner men with some definition instead of muscular guys who look like they work out. So Japanese men adapt by wearing stylish, fitted clothing and get layered anime haircuts that would seem like trying too hard in Western cultures. For K-pop it's similar except Korean women are fine with muscula…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 12:08 AM
5

-Men no longer have to pay. In todays society men are not expected to pay for everything for women. Just because a society is equal on paper does not mean the the cultural conditions and traditional expectations that have existed for centuries don't favor one side or the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 11:51 PM
2

If there's no manipulative intent then having a physical preference is neither morally right or wrong, it's just superficial. As long as you don't insult people who don't fit your preferences, attraction is mostly involuntary. People shouldn't lower their standards just because strangers aren't okay with them. There aren't that many convincing moral arguments about why a 5 year age gap is cool but not a 10 or 20 year gap that doesn't rely on subjective markers of "what feels right" or cultural s…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 11:40 PM
4

I see, glad it worked out for you. But I think OP's main point about women not making the first move still stands, generally speaking. Since even in your case you were the one to initiate hanging out with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 10:41 PM
3

I just had a woman pay for a date this weekend? Did she make the first move and approach you?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 10:30 PM

Not dating skills though. General social skills are about getting along with people, dating and flirting involves taking risks and possibly offending people (because your goals might be at odds with one another).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 09:38 PM

Exactly, the women who say don't approach are also expressing their personal opinions
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 09:32 PM
1

To use an example from the other side, a lot of women don't want to date men their age with little relationship or sexual experience because they refuse to have to "teach" them. So it's not necessarily a moral condemnation but a lack of compatibility due to mismatch of experiential or developmental levels in the specific area of concern.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 08:40 PM
1

Sure, or level of experience generally
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 08:29 PM
1

Maybe not right away on the first date, but compatibility in that regard is important for a lot of people. It's a question one might eventually ask along with something like relationship history. Besides, everything you ask on a date is potentially judgmental. Not in the sense of "oh you're a bad person," but in the sense that you're trying to weed out people who aren't compatible with you. It doesn't have to be about slut shaming.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 08:16 PM
1

Why not ask, "when was the last time you were tested for STIs?" Sure you can ask that as well, but if the answer isn't satisfactory then naturally you're going to wonder about the number. It's not wrong to ask these questions, just don't jump to moral conclusions. What? Having sex prior doesn't mean someone can't form an attachment. It's not a guarantee of course, but people's preferences are often subconsciously reinforced by statistical correlations, whether or not they're true for the individ…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 08:08 PM
1

From a practical standpoint the most obvious reason would be likelihood of STIs From an emotional standpoint it would (arguably) be about likelihood of attachment to you compared to exes From a moral standpoint I personally don't care
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 07:59 PM

You're proving my point, plenty of women would disagree with you that approaching them in a grocery store or while she's trapped on a bus would somehow be acceptable. Especially Gen Z and especially the public transportation thing because you're not supposed to approach a woman where she has no exit strategy. And all that is just your opinion. You don't and can't speak for all women, that's the point. Taking risks and failing is pathologized as being creepy nowadays, instead of just the necessar…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 06:46 PM

Approach women in safe public spaces that are appropriate. This isn't brain surgery. What also isn't brain surgery is that different women have different opinions on which spaces are "appropriate," so even if you wrote out a detailed list your advice is only meaningful to the extent that guys will be able to spot a random woman in public and somehow magically know that she's actually "Stunning-Potato-1984" in order to respect your personal preference in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/23 06:35 PM
2

It's because it's a response that doesn't add anything to the conversation. If there's an incident of a black or Muslim person committing a crime then saying "not all black people"/"not all Muslim people" is almost the necessary thing to do to fight back against a generalization that can lead people to bigoted thinking. Same with men. It's like "All lives matter!" as a response to "black lives matter", it's pedantry over semantics that doesn't add anything. This analogy makes absolutely no sense…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/23 06:06 PM
1

That's a good one
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/23 04:23 AM

Like smoking a skunk that makes you feel funny
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/23 04:22 AM

Lol that guy's not "average" though, he's a minor celebrity with money I'm sure. He probably wouldn't be pulling Ariana Grande with his personality if he were a nobody.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/23 03:59 AM

But those responses come afterwards, they don't justify the inaccurate answers made beforehand. If you suspect that men won't believe you then why would you attempt to give an incomplete answer, either be truthful or just refuse to answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 10:59 PM
14

Because people would rather blame individuals for their own problems/assume people have some moral deficit that causes their problems But that doesn't explain why many people who are specifically left-leaning and recognize that poor minorities are screwed over by the system (and not because they're lazy or bad people) will then turn around and tell men to "pull themselves up by the bootstraps" when it comes to the topic of dating specifically. I think there's an additional element of prejudice a…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 10:51 PM

"Q4W: What do you find attractive in a man?"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 08:14 PM

Is it any surprise that the rise of online dating as the most common way that couples meet coincides with reported rising levels of loneliness among both sexes?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 07:56 PM

How is asking a person what they find attractive an irrational or illogical question? That's the most straightforward thing you can ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 07:54 PM
3

Right so people should just be honest and say "we want to protect <25 year olds from predators and our dating competition," instead of making universal claims about power dynamics that are in principle supposed to apply consistently regardless of age.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:52 PM
3

I actually think a better litmus test is if it works for the statistical "average" person, or slightly above/below, since that's where most people actually fall. What I mean by universally helpful is that even an ugly person can follow the advice and not have to say "Thanks for nothing, this hasn't helped at all" But yeah, advice for average people is going to reach a broader audience than advice that already assumes you're their physical type
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:49 PM
2

Nobody cares about a 7-year gap at 40. Which kind of makes all the "anti-" arguments seem insincere. So suddenly power dynamics and different life stages don't exist after 30 or whatever? If you're 40 and dating a 55 year old man then he was already in high school when you were just a baby!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:43 PM
5

In fact the opposite might be true, since young men are the most violent group of the population. Yeah no one mentions the fact that crime rates are disproportionately high among young men below 25 when it comes to "potential for abuse" in the age gap discussion. Also that makes the strength/height gap between men and women in heterosexual couples even more relevant, but that cognitive dissonance is so strong and people love their height/size preferences so much that no one is ready to have that…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:38 PM
15

Nah, female beauty standards are also unrealistic in terms of mutability and affect women more fundamentally. Being thin is easier than being muscular, but women aren't solely expected to be thin to be pretty. Women are also expected to age well (which you can't always control), not to mention they're judged on fewer variables other than looks so there's less alternatives to compensate for being considered less than a 7 in terms of physical attractiveness. Whereas men can make up for looking unr…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:29 PM
24

Yep the short answer is apex fallacy. A good litmus test for whether a piece of advice is actually universal enough to be helpful, is to imagine you're about to give the advice to the ugliest person of the opposite gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:23 PM
1

The OP isn't about women not knowing what they want, it's about women not accurately articulating what they want. If the idea is that women aren't obligated to instruct men, then why even answer those questions in the first place? Just don't respond instead of giving a wrong or deceptive answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:19 PM
9

This is why filters in online dating apps are counter-productive a lot of the time: because they don't take into account how someone could potentially make you feel outside of numbers and stats on paper.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:17 PM
3

He's talking about individual women being consistent with their own preferences and describing them accurately, rather than different women obviously having different preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/23 06:14 PM
3

Lmao that's perfect how has no one thought of incelles before
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/23 09:01 PM
1

You can actually meditate in your sleep. It's hard to tell when you've done it right but apparently you know you're doing it wrong if you dream
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/23 08:15 PM
1

Sure I'm not saying the stats are numerically wrong. Just that the correlation isn't really saying much IMO. Again that seems to me more like a consequence of defining the 18-29 time frame. Also what proportion of people are actually getting married at 18 for that age cohort's statistics to be equally meaningful? The average age of marriage is at least late 20s for most industrialized countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/23 06:04 PM
-1

Men cheat more, the only age group with the opposite numbers are people between 18-29, but the difference is 1% while for older age groups it can almost double with men cheating more than women. I'm not sure that that's a very instructive statistic on men somehow being more disloyal by nature. In fact the numbers and the timelines make sense, women have more power in the dating market between 18-29 when they're young generally speaking so they have more "extramarital options" during that time, w…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/23 05:50 PM
1

In theory sure, but this would work a lot better with example pictures. Your description is way too subjective
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/23 05:43 PM
4

That's not really the point though. There's a misconception that being skinny is enough for women to be considered desirable. Saying that women need only be pretty and are born with value (as opposed to men who must create value) is a moot point if you're a woman who doesn't happen to be genetically lucky, and a lot of dating conversations that reference "women" are just apex fallacy arguments with "attractive women" in mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/23 05:38 PM

They're eager to impart knowledge and share their interests with you, but are often uninterested in receiving any of that from you. Not in my experience, older people are more likely to be interested in youth culture than vice versa, because youth culture is cool culture and always relevant. Sports is about watching young athletes perform, social media, fashion, and cultural trends are dominated by young people, entertainment features mostly young people. Also someone younger than you might have…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 11:33 PM
2

Tfw your plate is a wheel of cheese
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 07:21 PM
1

Yeah I can see the appeal for both sides Shared cultural references? The fun is in the relatability Different cultural references? The fun is in discovering new things But shared values is most important IMO
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 06:58 PM
1

That specific argument is meaningless though. I dated a foreign girl my age once and despite us both speaking English I knew next to nothing about pop culture in her country lol
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 06:55 PM
1

I mean Mexican music is dope, so it's probably just that
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 06:46 PM
1

"Fellas, you ever catch your woman just lookin at ya, but not saying nothin?"
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 06:40 PM
2

Lol nah one of the most common "arguments" people bring up against age gaps is "but muh pop culture references!!!1" I say "argument" in quotes because it's like, yeah sometimes that's the case, but do you not realize you're also shitting on...same age inter-cultural and interracial relationships as well?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 06:33 PM
2

The difference beetween male standards for beauty and female standards is mutability almost all women can become sex goddesses to like 40% of men That's just an exaggeration, there are plenty of women with unfortunate facial structure. Framing the dating conversation as though "women" = attractive women must be endlessly frustrating for the ones who aren't genetically lucky.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 06:05 PM
7

If you're asking why as in the logical reason, then obviously people treat attractive people better because they're visually pleasant to be around. If you're asking philosophically "Do attractive people deserve to be treated better just because the person finds them attractive" then obviously not. I’m not a 19 year old Instagram model I'm curious why you specified the age in setting up the female version of Chad
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 05:54 PM
5

You're making the assumption that women with a certain trait prefer men who share the same trait, instead of men who have the opposite of that trait (because human beings and opposite sex attraction triggers are largely dimorphic). That's like thinking short women generally prefer men their height because they're more "compatible" that way. There are many introverted women who prefer an outgoing man who can take charge in social situations and compensate for the deficiency, rather than date a ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/23 07:06 PM
1

So go for the 40% of women who don't? Again the 40% figure breaks down into the 25% who actually want guys close to 6 feet. And the remaining 15% who would actually accept 5'8" guys says nothing about the percent who are happy with 5'6" guys, etc etc. Why focus on a small percentage of women? Agreed, that's the one attitude that won't spiral you into depression. But my point was that women have physical standards beyond "cook and be nice"
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/23 06:29 PM
1

"Taller than me" is a height requirement. A relative height requirement is still a minimum standard. Even if we're talking about absolute height requirements, there's enough women who filter out guys < 6 ft on dating apps for it to be a common phenomenon. On Bumble it's something like 60% of women want 6 feet tall guys, and only 15% of women want men < 5'9". Not just preference, they're completely excluding them.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/23 05:57 PM
1

Most women want a taller guy, in fact most women want a guy tall enough for her in heels
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/23 05:29 PM
1

"6 feet" is a stand-in for height requirements. Most women have height requirements for a partner, which you forgot to include in your summary
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/23 05:19 PM
1

Women's standards: be a nice adult Preferably 6 feet nice
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/23 05:07 PM
1

Looks like the sub is back up again lol
/r/AllPillDebate11/08/23 12:55 AM
2

😢
/r/AllPillDebate11/08/23 12:26 AM
8

Fellow refugee, reporting in
/r/AllPillDebate10/08/23 11:25 PM
1

She's a sturdy woman
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/23 04:35 AM
5

At first I thought the question would be a "which button do I press" meme type situation for you, but then I thought "they're probably not fat enough for him"
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/23 03:04 AM
1

When I say This level of Good Samaritan concern for strangers whose dating choices supposedly "don't affect you personally" I mean in terms of dating choices or preferences that are morally neutral, and where women are injecting their assumptions about a guy's character "unsolicited" in online discussions like these. Where the only interesting information in the post is their ages and then women "stop reading at the ages" and go on a spiel about serial killers exploiting younger women or some ot…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/23 05:24 PM
1

I'm guessing you don't understand what "morally convincing" is. Obviously a lot of people are biased in real life and give dating advice colored from their own experiences. But that doesn't mean the other people receiving their advice don't recognize that they're projecting their bitterness onto all men (or women) who match their exes' physical descriptions. People rarely use statistics and data to convince someone about relationship advice Thanks for making my point. There's a lot of shitty adv…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/23 05:22 PM
10

At least in my understanding "douchebag" has long been associated with the frat boy type who's definitely physically attractive but acts or dresses in an obnoxious way. So they do certainly get sexual attention, including from a very specific demographic (sorority girls) that most men would agree are also quite physically attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/23 05:15 PM
24

Fuckboy the opposite of in*l Bingo, you hit the nail on the head To the extent that "inc3l" is the favorite go-to argument of angry misandrists trying to shut down debate and the worst possible insult in their minds, you'd imagine that the exact opposite term would imply that you have quite favorable qualities as a man
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/23 05:11 PM
1

While true, that negates the whole point of this sub. All the threads are by definition founded on generalisation. PPD veers into giving dating advice sometimes, and personally I think any dating advice that's overly generic and overly prohibitive is counter-productive if it results in artificially limiting your options based on a generalization. Is there any evidence for this? I'm well aware of correlation vs causation. But confounding variables are by definition confounding Sadly I haven't enc…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/23 12:46 AM
2

It’s not always jealousy though sometimes it’s concern. Oh yeah for sure, I'm not claiming that's always the case. I'm just addressing the very defensive claim from some women that it's somehow never because of jealousy. Some age gap relationships are ok but I just get alarm bells going off for young girls in relationships where men list things like inexperience in the world as a good trait I think listing "inferior" traits can seem suspicious sometimes, especially when it's worded in a gross or…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/23 12:16 AM
1

How is it an unfounded generalisation? Age gap relationshios are more likely to fail than non-age gap ones. And the pitfalls are pretty well documented by just about everyone. "Unfounded generalization" was kind of redundant on my part, the point is that generalizations and stereotypes by nature are inaccurate and morally unjustifiable when applied to individuals. Statistics don't justify character assumptions about individuals. Age gap relationshios are more likely to fail than non-age gap ones…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 11:46 PM
3

So between one good age gap relationship and every example of terrible older men in sight my bias is obviously against age gaps. Anecdotal evidence is not morally convincing evidence. That applies equally to the reverse situation of a younger woman who advises other women to date older guys because "every dude I dated my age was immature and ambition-less." As well as a white woman who advises others not to date [insert minority] men because "all my toxic exes were [minority] and look what happe…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 11:23 PM
2

But the leap of logic that "men who fetishise younger women" means older women are against age gaps because of jealousy. As opposed to there are so many examples of how damaging and bad these relationships tend to be. That's because the arguments against age gaps tend to defy logic and rely instead on using personal anecdotes and small sample sizes to project universal moral claims. And these people love to forget about nuance and the dangers of stereotyping when it comes to age specifically. Ev…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 11:14 PM
3

It's not about being jealous of that specific woman, it's about being jealous (and anxious) in a general sense at the prospect of your dating pool shrinking, because subconsciously you might have a fear that men your age are open to younger women while you're fighting against time pressure and social expectations to settle down by a certain age. (Which I sympathize with, just saying though.) Claiming "I wouldn't have dated a guy like that anyway so it doesn't matter" is kind of a meaningless jus…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 10:48 PM

Preferences are allowed. It's more that online dating forces you to arbitrarily quantify your preferences in what basically amounts to a split-second decision influenced by broad group-level stereotypes. When you're forced to list what you like on paper you end up excluding a lot of people you would have really good chemistry with if you had met organically in real life. In other words, people don't always "know" their exact preferences when you put them on the spot. The fact that people's onlin…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 09:19 PM
2

Granted you'd have an easier time arguing the life experience thing for the average 20 yo vs. the average 30 yo, but keep in mind that the age taboo extends to 40 yos dating 25 yos as well, in which case the "life experience" argument quickly devolves into a lot of flimsy assumptions after college. A single, childless 25 year old with a full-time job would be closer in life stage to a single, childless 40 yo with a full-time job than another 25 year old with kids and an ex-spouse. Completely dif…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 03:05 AM
0

There is the maturity and wisdom as well You could say the same thing about the height vs. maturity variables, why go for the fun taller guy instead of the shorter more mature guy? People prioritize different things even after considering multiple variables. Not everyone dates for the same reasons, some want marriage, some enjoy intellectual discussions, some just want to have fun with another person they share values and interests with. If you agree that your looks aren't perfectly correlated w…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 02:56 AM
1

"Why date 20 year olds when 30 year olds are also attractive?" is an odd question that doesn't make much sense. "Why do women date 6 foot tall guys when there are also attractive 5'9" guys?" Because that's what they prefer? I don't agree with Myron that ALL women lose their value over time, but why on Earth are you trying to deconstruct and pathologize sexual preferences like they're some great mystery when everyone agrees: looks matter attractive people are generally more desirable the odds of …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 01:46 AM
6

Good thing not everyone's family has narrow-minded, conservative views about who people are "allowed" to date
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 01:39 AM
1

You're missing the point that being in the same stage of life is more dependent on when you accomplish or experience certain things than your literal age
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 01:26 AM

It's almost like you stop hating an entire group when you meet a decent person from that group
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 10:42 PM

Totally forgot about poppyblu, wonder if she still spends time here lol
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 08:46 PM

Isn't it obvious? The difference is that you can't systematize improvement at social activities because you can't control someone else's opinion of you with comparable efficiency simply by "practicing" Consent is independent of how skilled you are at socializing
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 08:44 PM

At least Lillth is more equal opportunity and bashes on feminist hypocrisy (sometimes) as well as male hypocrisy The worst types are ordinarily left-leaning types who suddenly think like conservatives when it suits them
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 08:40 PM
2

This post is a charcuterie board of bad logical reasoning and bad data
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 05:35 PM
3

And yet countries where murder is illegal still have murder. Checkmate!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 05:13 PM

I see, well as long as you're fine with the risks then go for it I guess
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 03:23 AM

I feel like the bigger issue here is mixing your business life with your personal life
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 02:44 AM
3

OK in terms of government then, the patriarchy ended the moment that the last remaining law prohibiting women from voting or holding public office was rescinded. Unless there's some local or municipal law in some podunk town that says the women of that town can't vote. For all intents and purposes the US government and most Western countries are not patriarchies anymore. You can argue that socially men are still considered the "head of household," but social attitudes are democratic in that both…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/23 04:41 AM
6

Only statistically, not by design. Men and women are equal under the law. It's nearly impossible to meaningfully and quantitatively determine that a government is a patriarchy based solely on a percentage.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/23 04:34 AM

Don't forget Chuck Norris
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/23 03:31 AM

Besides the three conservatives in Hollywood I'm sure they can always blame it on the liberal white men who need to sit their white asses down and LISTEN
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/23 03:05 AM

Yeah also risks getting their communities shut down
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/23 12:07 AM

That's because they're afraid there's not enough public support for their movement so it would destroy their progress to take ownership for the more hateful and extreme elements within their group. For incels that fear is even more extreme, because the original movement involving the meaning of the label without the "hating women" part almost doesn't exist anymore thanks to the way the public has perceived and redefined the term.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 11:44 PM

I doesn't help the discussion that people are often just working with a bunch of different definitions of incel to begin with
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 11:27 PM

I dunno, based on his interesting history of orbiter drama it feels like Destiny puts on a "liberal male feminist ally" facade in order to hook up with e-girls and then discard them
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 10:56 PM

There are plenty of 23 yo women who are fine with dating 31 yo guys, even if you go by the age formula that particular 8 year gap is not even considered taboo at that age lol
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 10:46 PM
1

Cursed comment
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 01:22 AM
1

Nah I'd rather not associate juicy fruits with stanky underarms ( ′~‵)
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 01:16 AM
1

I wonder what happens if you ask ChatGPT to write something ChatGPT would write
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 01:09 AM
2

Also ripe should be reserved for describing peaches and other edible things :/
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 01:03 AM
5

This is about as convincing as a dude saying "I love me some super-tall Amazonian snoo snoo, petite women are trash!" It's not common enough a sentiment to feel threatening lol
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 12:53 AM
3

I mean a non-pharmacist could easily use rat poison instead
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 11:23 PM
2

"Why do women love tall strong men with broad shoulders so much? Do they love being physically abused? Sexual preferences are so weird amirite" Galaxy-brain level argument "No one says men aren't allowed to have preferences, it's totally fine as long as they don't insult women who don't fit those preferences" Bull fucking shit lol
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 11:13 PM
8

I think both of those statements are overstated. It's kind of weird trying to debunk the wall by reversing it and upholding it for men. There are attractive older women who get attention from younger men, and vice versa. This isn't a competition. Ironically in your quest to fight back against against male fantasy you created your own revenge fantasy and overstate how much people hate age gaps based on...personal anecdotes and tiktok. Social media doesn't represent real life opinions of the avera…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 05:16 PM
2

Perhaps a lack of self-esteem holds back these individuals even more than simply being autistic would
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 05:11 PM
1

Standard just means normal, average, or not exceptional
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 04:40 PM
1

Why are anonymous social media platforms like twitch You mean Twitter? Twitch is a very public facing platform
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 01:23 AM
3

"Wow how objectifying, so you think men are fish instead of human beings? Way to tell on yourself Jesus"
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 01:10 AM
2

No I agree obviously these tendencies aren't universal
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 01:06 AM
2

Yeah it's kind of like the dating version of a restaurant getting 5 star reviews or having long lines every day. At minimum a person would be curious and take a second look wondering why it's so popular, even if they ultimately decide not to eat there.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 12:50 AM
2

No they're saying that being a man and having other women fawn over you is it's own type. As in, if a woman sees you hanging out with other beautiful women then she's more likely to find you attractive, regardless of whether you'd be her physical type if you were standing by yourself instead. Same with married men and taken men getting an attractiveness "boost," because supposedly they've been vetted already by other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 12:44 AM
3

JA is a necessary force for balancing out Lillth's tireless efforts in the "calling out opposite gender hypocrisy" competition. Although I'd say he's ahead of her in the "logically coherent" category
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/23 05:47 AM
1

Right but the bare minimum for success is that you have to first win the competition with her before you even get to worry about hypergamy
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 10:39 PM
1

Yes but you're also competing with her. It becomes more obvious with an example where you both work in the same industry (like you're both lawyers, let's say). Since women with that preference are more likely to be attracted to superstars in their industry as opposed to their subordinates, you making partner would put you in an advantage over a scenario where you were both associates.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 10:25 PM
1

In terms of romance, men and women aren't competing with each other since they look for different things in their partner If the woman you're interested in prefers a man who makes more money than she does then logically speaking you are indirectly competing with her salary for her attention. Any dating preference that's comparative and changeable (more successful, more fit than me, etc) involves inter-sexual competition
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 10:08 PM
1

What makes the entire rest of the country unlivable trash?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 09:15 PM
3

I'd say sky-high rents in places next to the pacific ocean make them unlivable as well for the average person
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 07:10 PM
1

Also idk what you mean by they don’t want to be creepy literal rich and famous guys have been publicly accused of being creeps That's exactly my point though. All the more reason for a rich guy to minimize his risk of being MeToo'ed by waiting for women to approach him and be the ones to initiate interaction instead. He can still get the caliber of women he desires, because once you have options at that level it's not as big a loss to miss out on any one particular woman who expects you to appro…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 07:52 PM

EVIDENCE that HEIGHT is not the #1 factor in a woman's attraction: Huh? No one's saying that height is linearly correlated to attractiveness to infinity There's a sweet spot of not too tall and not too short around the 6'0" to 6'4" range
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 07:39 PM
1

A rich attractive man is still a man at the end of the day. He will still pursue the women he finds attractive especially if he is the type of man to be successful. I wouldn't say that, men aren't all the same. Also rich men aren't necessarily good-looking or extroverted. The point is that a guy with wealth and status doesn't have to pursue women anymore, because even passively he'll likely be able to attract women who he deems "good enough" for him. That's a win-win for a lot of guys, why risk …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 06:30 PM
7

Actually when the guy is rich and famous (or incredibly attractive) I think the dynamic reverses, the woman is much more likely to make the first move. Because a rich man is more rare than a beautiful woman. It's like being a male celebrity surrounded by female fans, they're the ones chasing him.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 04:04 PM

People often transfer the ridicule they receive from those "socially superior" to themselves and unleash their frustration on targets that they perceive to be lesser than themselves. "The bullied becomes the bully" is an unfortunate quirk of human nature.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/23 05:40 AM

What are you rolling your eyes drinking wine about?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/23 11:33 PM

"Anyone who puts in effort to make a good point I disagree with is a nerd"
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/23 11:30 PM
3

That's true, but the cashier at the grocery store also recognizes me and makes conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 11:36 PM
1

If someone uses a hand gesture that's offensive in their own culture, it's not bigoted to think there was an offensive intent, even though you would've found it inoffensive in a different culture. But in that case you know that it's considered offensive, so you're not making an assumption based on how they look. Meanwhile OP seems to be referring to instances where people in certain subs might judge men and women of the same culture (or assumed to be American by default) differently. It's more a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 11:35 PM
1

I disagree, except in one specific context. Probabilistic statements (especially ones that attempt to predict someone's character or intentions) are not accurate when applied to individuals, and certainly not considered morally acceptable. I don't see how the concept of assigning group blame based on shared physical characteristics is either logically or morally defensible. The only time it's kind of understandable is when you believe your life is literally in danger at that moment, in which cas…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 07:31 PM
6

They already have something in common (friends with wedding party) and they both already have demonstrated social proof because they have friends and family who like them and want their company. Sort of, but being a wedding guest isn't social proof if you were invited by family out of obligation and not because they normally enjoy your company. Man at the grocery store or Target who appears to be hunting lone women to hit on? No social proof, no common interests. There's no social proof at the f…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 07:28 PM
1

Well men and women aren't the same Exactly, not all men are the same as other men and not all women are the same as other women
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 06:20 PM
1

Calling out a double standard is not "autism" What you're doing is called "gaslighting"
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 06:18 PM
1

The point is that you don't actually know if the woman is going to say no "for sure" without asking first. Unless she's already married or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 03:57 PM
3

"Women should stop whining about not having female spaces, have they never heard of something called...the women's restroom? Hyuk hyuk hyuk hyuk"
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 10:31 PM
3

It's funny because if you go on a lot of women's subs they're very unapologetic about making negative generalizations about men and banning users for saying even slightly sympathetic things like "now hold on now, not all men are like that." Meanwhile if you ask a question in the AskMen sub like "describe a time when you got turned off after you saw a girl naked" the highest upvoted responses are white-knighty feel good stories like "I once got turned off by a skinny girl with slightly visible ri…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 10:22 PM

Nah I think any online platform makes it easier to catfish someone and waste their time. Also the user base tends to self-select more easily for certain undesirable demographics.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 06:55 PM

Dating apps work for women Quantity? Sure. Quality? Jury's still out on that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 06:44 PM

but I’m wondering if all these TikTok’s about women telling men not to approach is finally gonna kill off that dating route. I highly doubt it, simply because the demand is still there. Online dating apps simply don't work for a lot of guys. Also I think people implicitly recognize that this kind of "terminally online" discourse is kinda insane and not representative of real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 06:35 PM

Salary negotiations also require "mutual choice" but normally there's one side that has much more power in the negotiation
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 06:15 PM

Reminds me of end credits in movies where they list the names of actors playing background characters like "Ugly Man #1" Imagine putting that one on your demo reel
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 05:49 PM

Ah yes, the elusive baby deer-cow
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 05:32 PM

"It's fine if you want to have this preference, just don't insult people who don't fit your preference" This sentiment is largely insincere and used by people to defend their own preferences in the heat of the discussion. Mostly because these people, when confronted with a preference they disagree with, will then twist the definition of "it's fine" to allow themselves the privilege of insulting others: "well ackshually...no one's literally stopping you from dating XYZ, so ignore me trying to sha…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 05:26 PM
1

I would expect gay men to have learned to be very socially observant and careful for obvious reasons, but I also haven't heard of a social epidemic of straight men with anger management problems going postal on another dude for flamboyantly complimenting them. Then again cities with higher LGBTQ populations tend to be liberal so there's that too.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/23 07:07 AM
1

I never said "following" (or suggested "stalking") either, you're tripping lol Have you never walked (while talking) with someone and waited until there were fewer people around to say something sensitive or potentially embarrassing for either of you? C'mon use your life experience here
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 11:39 PM
10

Gay men have better manners and are savvy enough not to proposition strangers if they aren’t certain their attention is wanted. Lol on the contrary, I'd say gay men generally have thicker skin and a sense of humor about realizing that people are just lonely and want to hook up Tell me more about isolating women from everyone so she has no escape and so a man can proposition her without repercussions Never said that at all, you must have overlooked the earlier thing I said about "not trapping the…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 11:28 PM
8

Cornering someone because a man wants attention is rude as hell. "Cornering" is painting men with a broad brush based on a rude minority, most guys are aware of avoiding doing things that might creep out the woman in obvious ways like standing between her and an exit. They don’t do that to men. Gay men exist. But if he is a man who follows women around to ensure there is no one around and no “white knights” to save her from an uncomfortable situation, Again the framing is kind of inaccurate. Yes…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 11:01 PM
15

People have a right to privacy and autonomy I don't think you know what either of those words mean Making small talk with a stranger in a public space does not violate privacy or autonomy
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 10:48 PM
3

I think you misspelled "creepier" and "more predatory"
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 02:04 AM

I see
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 01:13 AM

Don't they ever ask you? What do you say then
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 12:45 AM
1

Honestly, no woman ever wants you talking to her I have not wanted to talk to the overwhelming majority of the men who have tried to talk to me "No woman wants a man to talk to her...unless he's one of the small minority of men she wants to talk to And he should know that by somehow reading her mind without approaching her to find out in the first place"
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 08:20 PM

Perhaps women thinking baggy clothes aren't feminine is the reason why women's clothing doesn't have pockets
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 06:12 PM

Women can be funny but as a whole they probably don't feel nearly as much pressure to be funny, so I'd imagine it's not a skill that women are generally forced to develop.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 05:52 PM

I would still disagree because a broad statement like that can't possibly apply to 100% of unsuccessful men. Also there's no guarantee of success for any activity that involves the consent of another party, no matter how hard you "try." You can be a catch and still not meet the right person due to your location or your priorities or whatever. I believe this for single men as well as single women over a certain age, it's not necessarily their fault. "Bad luck" is an actual thing that exists. Sinc…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 04:55 AM

Disagree because dating apps are fundamentally designed to exploit gender imbalance and desperate users, and mixing profit with an artificial substitute for healthy social interaction (like social media apps or dating apps) means that whoever designs the system designs it so the house always wins. Even if you had said "dating" instead of "dating apps" your point would have been somewhat more arguable, but there's no question OLD is an imbalanced and undemocratic system statistically and intentio…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 04:45 AM
3

Maybe, but there are communities of women on Reddit who actually think like this Either way it's entertaining because the really ridiculous posts make the movement look bad
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 03:34 AM
6

"Women's only value is offering sex and children" I like this post because as a representative of your gender you took this great opportunity to raise up womanhood and yet still managed to shit on yourselves in the final act of your anti-male diabtribe
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 02:56 AM
49

However, if NT guys are willing to date ND women more, are they just willing to put up with their indiscretion more, or don't care as much? Yes, on two levels. Being awkward or shy itself is already generally considered an endearing trait in women but a very unattractive one for men. But also, men tend to be more willing to forgive personality quirks as long as he's physically attracted.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/23 09:28 PM
25

Short women also "understand" what short men have to deal with in life on an intellectual level, but when you're talking specifically about dating that understanding doesn't necessarily translate to romantic interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/23 09:25 PM
2

Why did you start talking to her? Who starts talking to strangers in a Wendy's? This is literally the time for a sir this is a Wendy's meme. I don't think it's weird to make small talk with strangers, especially if you're both waiting for something and that thing is taking a long time. Human beings are social animals. It's pretty apparent that most people often "want" to socialize but are afraid to because they don't want to "look weird." You can test this by observing how people act whenever so…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/23 06:59 PM

I'd would be able to stay professional but it would absolutely suck to be surrounded by people who it'd be a terrible idea to date
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/23 04:01 AM
1

That depends on a lot of factors. Are you using a shotgun method or are you more intentional in only approaching women who you think would be "in your league"? Also how old are the women you're approaching? The taboo against cold approaches seems to be more of a Gen Z thing, so a lot of younger guys get scared away from talking to random women in real life because of all the rhetoric about "being hit on by creepy dudes" on social media.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/23 12:36 AM

Putting aside the possibility that the (very forward) women who told you you were too short may not have given an entirely straight answer because they were hesitant to give the real reason... ...it does depend on how you frame it I guess. You see it as wasted time but I'd see it as creating an opportunity. If she rejects you upon meeting you because of your height then you get to save that hour or so you would have spent on the date. But at least you took the shot. If instead she rejects you af…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 11:25 PM

1) Either pick a photo where it's obvious which one you are or have someone else take a photo of you. 2) I think listing your height is counterproductive if it doesn't differentiate you in a good way, if she asks then tell her but don't volunteer the information outright. Let her reject you instead of rejecting yourself on paper. If she cares then it'll probably be one of her early questions anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 11:10 PM
3

There is no need for drama or awkwardness if you're polite and friendly. If you get rejected and lash out in rage, well yes, that's is going to be awkward for the person being reheated. Sure you can control how you approach, but you can't control how the woman will react. Some women are uncomfortable with being approached in a class where they're trying to focus and learn. In a closed environment where women doesn't have a good exit strategy and might find it hard to say "no" without being stuck…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 07:08 PM
3

Women whom you already have something in common with through a class or whatever that you both attend regularly Only if neither of you cares much about the class or the event you attend regularly (to avoid potential awkwardness or drama). It's not great to put women you see on a daily or weekly basis in the position of having to navigate an uncomfortable situation she didn't ask for. Cold approaches are better for this reason because the discomfort is temporary and one-time. The exception would …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 06:48 PM
10

Depends on how you define cold approach. A "cool approach" where you actually have a relevant and interesting conversation with a stranger based on environmental context is more effective than just giving a compliment and asking for their number right away
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 06:40 PM
4

You are violating rule #1: who cares what women say. More generally, who cares what other people say? You can't please everyone and not everybody you meet in life is going to like you
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 06:38 PM

In order to pass a law, you would need to define it clearly. Define creepy for us please? You triggered my TRAP CARD!!!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 01:03 AM

Sounds like a fun experience lol
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 09:30 PM

There are a lot of neckbeards who give up because they believe they are too ugly to be redeemable
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 06:45 PM

Average people have flaws so a neckbeard thinking they're average wouldn't prevent them from accepting that they have flaws
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:58 PM

On the contrary, thinking of yourself as "not even average" is often an excuse for people not to self-improve because they're convinced they're unchangeably low on the totem pole so why even try
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:57 PM

She either is or ain’t interested from the get go. You'd be surprised, the first impression is not always the lasting one. Especially if it's a behavioral thing or a nerves thing. "At first I thought he was a jerk/kinda lame when he approached me at the party, but then..." is not an uncommon how-did-you-two-meet story IME.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:26 PM

Self-esteem is a gradual process not something you get over after a magic number of therapy sessions Any lasting progress you've made so far is thanks to your own dedication and hard work, not simply because of a prescription or even a therapist's words (give yourself more credit)
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:21 PM

If you can't even think of yourself as average then your self-esteem must be below the floor
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:13 PM

Unless you're being sarcastic I would probably temper my expectations
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:11 PM
4

"I live in rural Ohio and I never see mixed race couples. It simply aint happening! CMV"
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:07 PM
4

A lot of women do at least. It's like those relationship posts where someone in the comments figures out that OP's story is completely fake, and then you see some women go "well it doesn't matter if it's fake, these things happen in real life so OP's made up story confirms my narrative."
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 05:04 PM

If I had to guess it's because of what happened after they divorced
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 01:55 AM

I like this image because you can just rotate it counterclockwise to tell a different story
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 11:07 PM

The first question you have to ask is whether it's likely for that guy to attract the neurotypical woman in the first place
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 10:43 PM

Gold digging is relative, a guy with less than half a mil net worth can still be gold dug by a woman from a poor country. Or even a poor woman from the same country. By analogy, scammers don't care if you're rich they only care if you're gullible.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 06:50 PM
5

Yeah that's a good point. Otherwise middle age (and also infancy, adolescence, etc.) would be different in developing countries where they die at 55.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 07:20 PM

I think most people with life experience past high school would agree that it's possible for a group of women to be ruthlessly competitive with each other just as a group of men can be. After all the "Mean Girl" archetype didn't just materialize out of thin air. As for the idea that if women had institutional power and ruled the world they would be benevolent this is clearly not a given at all, we know full well that female racists and criminals exist. The only thing you can say with statistical…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 06:55 AM

The part which would be controversial would be if one were to draw conclusions on the white race, such as "Being of the caucasian race creates a tendency in an individual to promote racial oppression". That certainly would be a controversial statement that would be not acceptable in modern public discourse, I disagree that the controversial statement would be unacceptable in modern discourse when applied to non-marginalized groups. Sentiments like "only white people can be racist" and "every whi…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 06:39 AM

"Stupid" is just a stand-in for negative stereotypes and statements of generalization "White people are complicit in racial oppression" "Why are men so toxic" "White feminists don't care about black women" etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 05:48 AM

Any group that isn't considered a marginalized group
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 05:39 AM

I'd say the difference is that advertising acts on market research (instead of blind assumptions) to make a product appeal to a certain subset of a demographic. I doubt that beer companies would claim that all men love big boobies, just that enough do for them to capture a large enough market share of attention. In fact the idea of overgeneralizing would seem like bad marketing in principle actually. (Bud Light, as a recent example.) Most importantly though, ad-based generalizations used to targ…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 04:10 AM

Generalizing an entire group of people based on their immutable traits is bad even if you've been victimized by members of said group. As smart as a lot of individuals on Reddit claim to be it still feels these so-called principled victims are just mentally incapable of grasping this point. And the fact that even a small majority of a default sub with 13 million members doesn't have the courage to be intellectually honest about this is really depressing as a barometer of the state of social medi…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 02:55 AM
16

Yes a lot of older women are attractive, but having to go to the gym and use skincare by definition means that you're not "automatically" staying hot after 30, precisely because you have to spend more effort actively fighting to stay looking young in a way that came naturally without intervention when you were 20.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 12:36 AM
1

Jeff Bezos being rich doesn't make him an HVM. Dude's a cheater and probably a ruthless business manager and romantic partner. I feel like even FDS women would be silently screaming at the fact you're making them look bad lol Also celebrity rules don't apply to average people, by the same token TRP could easily point to certain rich men to prove their own points that would conflict with yours.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/23 05:26 PM

Officer, I thought the thing I was doing was legal you can’t arrest me!!! You're being obtuse. Let's say you bought CBD gummies from a store where marijuana is legal and then found out afterwards there were illegal drugs in them (real life example), you're saying it's perfectly fair for the cops to arrest you for heroin and fentanyl possession? C'mon now lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 07:28 PM

Obviously if you knew they were a victim beforehand then you should be arrested. I'm talking about services that are advertised as legal. There's no moral standard for criminal liability that could possibly make the customer culpable for the seller lying about their services in this scenario or any other. Are you supposed to assume anyone you buy anything from is always lying? Again, that would be insane, like arresting any customer who buys a pair of Nike shoes for "enabling forced/child labor"…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 07:18 PM

The problem is that the people calling for voter ID aren't necessarily up for making them completely free or minimizing the discrepancies. Thus the question of bias and motivations.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 02:52 AM

The spirit of the law here isn’t “let’s punish men for buying sex” it’s “let’s stop people from engaging in prostitution but in a way that still allows trafficked people to seek help.” That rationale doesn't make sense though, because the solution to trafficking is to target the pimps, not to target the customers who may not even be aware of the situation. Also voluntary, victimless sex work exists. So they're effectively punishing the wrong men in a move that doesn't even address the problem. L…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 02:48 AM

It's about the letter of the law vs. the spirit of the law, I'm addressing your point about neutrality and not so much the morality of prostitution itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 02:24 AM

Yes the two issues aren't exactly the same, but the analogy still holds though. It's about the letter of the law vs. the spirit of the law, I'm addressing your point about neutrality and not so much the morality of prostitution itself. To use another example, it'd be like passing a law making it illegal to pray more than 3 times a day. On its face there's no language explicitly targeting Islam or Muslims, so you could claim it's faith neutral. But clearly it has a disproportionate effect on Musl…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 02:00 AM

In the same way that enforcing voter ID is supposedly race neutral? On paper it might be but that might just be a way of covering up biased intentions by latching on to convenient statistical trends.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 01:41 AM

Yeah arresting pimps makes more sense than arresting the johns. In the case of trafficking victims, the pimps are the ones knowingly exploiting the women. The johns have no knowledge of this (if they do then that's when you actually have a reason for arresting them). In the case of escort services where everything is by-the-book and voluntary then the moral question doesn't even come into play. It'd be like arresting the customer for buying sneakers made by overseas sweatshop labor instead of ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 01:36 AM

I'm not sure your analogies work because with age gaps there's a very specific logic where larger = more concerning and age = life experience. And people bring up that logic like gospel in their arguments. So there's no reason to think that a small age gap is somehow an exception to the theory. Why would you date a guy 3-5 years older than you if another guy your exact age is also available (and therefore the risk of your relationship being power-imbalanced is reduced to zero)? If you believe th…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 06:59 PM

It's not confusing because it's clearly a self-serving and conveniently calibrated scale If every year matters in increasing the life experience gap then small gaps should not be immune from suspicion just because they're more common and happen to align with women's preferences for slightly older men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 06:35 PM
6

Right, which goes to my point that the vast majority of the 63% self-reporting as single aren't seeing any action at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 06:27 PM
4

And the truly average guy is statistically a stranger to both those things. Most men have to go through the serious relationship route
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 06:11 PM

If it were actually treated like a spectrum (and not an arbitrary line) then it wouldn't make sense for so many people to call a small gap like 3 years "not a gap at all."
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 05:51 PM

If it's actually a spectrum it should be: "Small gap small creepy, big gap big creepy" In real life though: "Small gap not creepy, big gap big creepy"
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 05:46 PM

Yeah that's a fair point. I figured people would be worried about data privacy and trusting personal photos with a nameless AI program, but then again that ship sailed a while ago when FB started using facial recognition.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 05:44 PM

How would the AI be more accurate than an aggregate of human ratings? Because of scale? I'd imagine the way they train the AI would be by feeding them human scores anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 05:38 PM

The fact that it's a spectrum makes it kinda suspicious how no one cares enough about a 4-5 year age gap to call it "kinda creepy" by default. Almost as if the 28 year olds dating 24 year olds want to have their cake and eat it too, by conveniently drawing the creepy line right above whatever their personal age gap happens to be. Like if people care so much about the math that there's even a formula for it, then a 20 year age gap being creepy would make a 5 year age gap "25% creepy" if they were…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 05:30 PM
5

No, it's the person's name! Why else would dating sites have it on the first line in bold letters?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 06:12 PM
4

A trait being a necessary-but-not-sufficient dealbreaker still doesn't necessarily mean it's the most valued one. There could be another even bigger dealbreaker than looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 06:09 PM

The responses to that AITAH post were so unreal I'm almost starting to think they're contrived or something "You're an asshole for getting mad at your gf for flashing strangers at Mardi Gras even though she explicitly agreed not to. Women have bodily autonomy they can do what they want." What the flying fuck kinda logic is that lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 08:54 AM

There's also a possibility that negging him is going to turn him off if he has options. I don't know anything about this guy but I'd suggest bringing up a topic or a hobby that you know you're more knowledgeable about than he is, to see how he deals with you being more competent. That might humble him and give you some insight on who he is as a person.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 01:30 AM

If you want him to "prove you wrong" then naturally that would imply challenging him on things he can actually change about himself or reasonably accomplish
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 01:17 AM

Ultimate stealth and secrecy is no joke
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/23 07:12 PM

people start dressing like ninjas
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/23 07:00 PM

I have way too many pixels
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/23 06:58 PM

Right but I'm saying don't those terms literally mean "masculine" and "feminine" by definition?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/23 06:48 PM

Idk what super short hair cut you're referring to. Like Jamie Lee Curtis? Yeah that kind of hairstyle The butch lesbians I know are feminine af Then wouldn't that make them more femme and less butch than they think they are, almost by definition?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/23 06:40 PM

Long hair has an absolutely huge effect IMO, that super short cut that a lot of women get when they hit their 40s/50s doesn't do them any favors I guess in general just look at how butch lesbians intentionally act/dress and do the opposite of that
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/23 06:25 PM
1

Also makes it hard to play certain instruments
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/23 10:42 PM
5

Guaranteeing a resource that costs money like "free healthcare" also involves mandating that someone other than the recipient (healthcare providers) provide a service based on certain conditions. No individual doctor owes you free service in the same way that no individual person owes you friendship or a relationship on your terms. But health and relationships are both important resources.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/23 12:50 AM

What's the term for a figure of speech that's been applied to the exact opposite of the thing it would otherwise literally describe An anti-metaphor? An ironic metaphor?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 11:15 PM

"What's so bad about Stormfront?" "White people have opinions /s"
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 10:59 PM

It's an echo chamber where they ban you for having different opinions or pushing back against stereotypes You can't expect to benefit from front page publicity without putting up with front page criticism, that's trying to have it both ways
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 10:53 PM
1

How would you be able to tell? If you see a man and a woman talking to each other it wouldn't necessarily register in your mind that he approached her with romantic intentions. It would just look like small talk from your POV. The only difference is that he might politely ask for her number at the end of the interaction before one of them leaves. Personally I'd be discreet about it and not do it in a situation where there are nosy people within earshot, but that's just me.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 08:44 PM
1

Even worse is the ones where they just sit there with a blank expression while the person on the other side of the split screen is actually doing the thing
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/23 11:04 PM
1

What's even weirder is reaction streamers who make their money from people watching people watch people eat
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/23 10:54 PM
2

Sometimes standing still is better than either one "If it ain't broke, don't fix it"
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/23 10:33 PM
10

Obviously those environments are different from each other in principle, the point is that not every woman shares your opinion. In practice a lot of women will make exceptions for the right guy, such that "inappropriate" locations become "appropriate" temporarily. Hence the "is it OK or not OK?" confusion from inexperienced guys. There's a reason why so many couples meet at work, even though the #1 rule is "don't dip your pen in company ink." (Although I agree that the workplace specifically is …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/23 10:17 PM
1

Lol fair enough
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/23 10:03 PM
5

The only good thing about that sub is that they don't outright ban people for pointing out bias or having heterodox opinions, unlike some other popular subs. At least not yet. Then again they do have a seemingly sneaky habit of locking posts at just the right time instead of deleting them, so that the top upvoted comments that align with mod opinions are set in stone for everyone to see but unable to respond to.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/23 08:56 PM
1

I feel like the first atom bomb might have been the Roe decision
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/23 08:47 PM

Always is veering into AWALT territory. If those are her only two options, then giving up money and good looks (and even compatibility, to strengthen your hypothetical) in exchange for simply a more optimal age on paper seems too self-sacrificing just to prove a political point. Most people past 25 don't obsess about age gaps to that degree in real life like you see on the internet. Now if she found another 30 year old who could compete with the 40 year old in every area? Then yeah she'd be stat…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 09:53 PM
1

You can it's just more difficult because having every option at your disposal is the ultimate test of self-control. People who win the lottery can also donate their money to charity and live the exact same lifestyle as before. But obviously that's not easy to accomplish nor is it easy to imagine as someone not in that position.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 09:40 PM
1

It's just a motivational attitude. People often say "I want to become the best [insert job] in my industry." Like how competitive athletes say "I want to become the best basketball player in the league." Except even saying you want to become top 0.5% is more realistic than saying you want to become literally the top person. If you don't believe in yourself then how can you expect others to?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 09:34 PM

If there's any "sacrificing" of social skills I'd say it's being willing to break social rules and take risks in order to land the date. Sometimes you gotta be "that guy" and come across as "creepy" to five people in order to meet the one person who likes you.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 06:52 PM
1

How can you tell if he's never thrown a ball? From watching him throw something?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 12:40 AM
0

Maybe not in your case, but a guy who can't catch or looks like he's never thrown a ball is a turn off for a lot of women. Even women who aren't athletic themselves. It's just a primal thing like having a square jaw or broad shoulders.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 12:34 AM
2

In this situation the women who also watch or play the particular sport you play will be impressed (as long as you're better than they are). That's your niche. But I think most people in general think this way, certain sports are more popular and enjoy higher status than others (and therefore make you more money if you're good). It's like how playing the guitar makes you a bad ass but playing the recorder makes you look like a panhandler.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 12:29 AM
4

I feel like there must be some kind of disconnect between my IRL friends and these terminally online people. People tend to hang out with other people like them with similar interests and values. (Attractive people tend to have attractive friends, athletes hang out with other athletes, etc.) Usually the odd ones out get made fun of or hide their deficiencies to fit in. So it's not especially surprising that all your IRL friends are a certain way in terms of dating success.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 12:12 AM
8

Western women who have lived in Japan or native Japanese women? I think you'll find there's a notable difference in their motivations for being single that wouldn't adequately explain the phenomenon in the former case.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 07:28 PM
4

But people focus on the actual Age as a sneaky way to imply that this behavior is inherent to people this age. You know, the same way they say “I don’t like group X because of Y” That's my biggest pet peeve with woke discourse, the idea that group stereotypes and -isms are only acceptable in one direction and not consistently. It's like OK, if we're going to be that pedantic about intersectionality, then there's literally no criticism you can weaponize against a 40 year old black man dating a 20…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 05:48 AM
3

I don't see how it's a faulty comparison, every common argument used against age gaps can also be used against different race relationships. Some of the arguments even work against height gap relationships. There's nothing uniquely more dangerous about age difference compared to other variables like race, height, size, extroversion, level of fame, salary, etc. that result in power dynamics. People just exaggerate age difference for cultural and political reasons that don't stand up to the easies…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 05:00 AM
2

If you believe that age gap friendships aren't that weird then age gap relationships shouldn't be either. Since you've already established that people of different ages can have things in common and relate, the only additional step that's required is the physical attraction. And we all know people are attracted to different things.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 04:47 AM

Men rate on bodies more than the face (which is why butterface is a thing) Isn't it the opposite? I thought the point of butterface ("BUT her face...") was to highlight how having a nice body doesn't make up for an unfortunate face.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 12:55 AM
1

Yeah the ratio does depend a lot on the specific activity
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 10:29 PM
7

If you are are single with no kids, what’s really stopping you from doing basically anything you want? It’s not like this stuff has an age limit on it. There is kind of an unspoken "social age limit" on a lot of activities. People will think you're weird if you're "that old guy at the club/yoga class/arcade" for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 10:21 PM
-2

Yes that's true. But surely marrying a super rich man will put you in a considerably better position of privilege to make your own money, if you so desired. The social connections you potentially gain from that are just as life changing as the tangibles.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 04:46 AM
-3

Why would I marry someone rich when I could just get rich on my own? Because it's not easy to just become rich? Because if wealth is what we want, it’s far better to make it on our own than depend on someone else for it Under ideal conditions, sure. But then you're also lumping in personal ambition with wealth. If wealth alone is what you want, then it's better to have someone's wealth than none at all after trying and failing. It wouldn't matter how you got it, if we interpret that statement li…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 04:34 AM
2

Generally speaking, sure. If one values financial stability and the ability to live a comfortable life then there's no obvious reason why one would object to an "excessive" amount of either in theory. Granted there are negative stereotypes associated with super rich men, and some women might genuinely be happy with a frugal lifestyle. But it's hard to say how much of the stereotypes or the lack of interest can be attributed to sour grapes/inaccessibility mentality.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 04:24 AM
7

Because super rich men are scarce, and scarcity gives you the power to choose. Not every woman is in the "super rich man" target demographic.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 03:32 AM

There's quite a few sunshine liberals who turn into conservatives on issues that personally affect them. NIMBYism and affordable housing was always one conspicuous example of this, nowadays it seems like the conversation around dating and relationships is another one.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/23 05:45 PM
1

Makes sense
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/23 09:11 PM
1

Lol that's it? I guess that's what happens when you have users from more extreme subs migrate to more "mainstream" subs and then become the mods there
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/23 08:50 PM
1

What did you say to get banned by your fellow feminists?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/23 08:44 PM
2

I agree with Myron's diagnosis of the double standard regarding men getting shit for having certain preferences, but I don't agree with his prescription that this means men should be allowed to have side chicks while they're in a committed relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/23 08:42 PM

Depends on what you consider a bad argument and how close the friend is
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 04:29 AM
2

OP didn't actually imply it's necessarily due to jealousy, they said "mainly irrational." Which isn't wrong, any argument that assumes something to be true of every member of a group due to bad individuals within that group is an irrational way of thinking. And most age gap arguments hinge on assumptions about a stranger based on only their age.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 04:20 AM

That's such a bad faith response lol The whole point of PPD is to discuss issues, that's like saying to a female OP "why you mad about slut shaming, only a slut would care enough to write a whole essay about it hurr durr"
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 04:09 AM
2

Not quite, they are superficially similar in that K Pop stars are the Korean analogue to the boy bands of the 90s and 00s music and dance wise. The key difference is that most young men in the West don't identify with boy bands and are more likely to emulate classically masculine role models like athletes and hip hop artists in terms of fashion and demeanor. Also the fan base for Justin Bieber and One Direction are primarily really young girls, but the fan base for K Pop artists includes a much …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 03:47 AM
5

Yes absolutely, it's a regional cultural thing. The difference is that this most recent Korean wave has been significantly bigger than the last ones. Like we're talking from being a 2% subculture to like a 20% subculture (ballpark numbers). But 20% is still not enough to replace the mainstream perception of Western masculinity.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 03:38 AM
5

The West is just late to the game, this fashion-conscious "slim macho" archetype of masculinity has been the norm in Korea and Japan for a long time. Being an attractive guy in those countries isn't so much about having a weightlifter's physique or a big bushy beard (gorilla macho), in fact those are commonly turn-offs for many women. It's about being cosmopolitan, mindful and sensitive, and having impeccable fashion sense and a layered hairstyle. (Although Korea is slightly more Americanized in…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 03:33 AM

For some reason I thought your user name was a play on Porco Rosso
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 01:42 AM
2

I don't think "cold approaching = short-term pleasure" is a fair assessment. A lot of serious couples meet as strangers without the help of a friend or intermediary. It's just one method of dating. Cold approach isn't just asking out women you meet in public (which isn't bad if done politely), it's also asking out someone at a party you don't share any mutual friends with.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 08:11 PM
1

Certainly old cars seem much more dangerous than old penises
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 07:56 PM
1

A) For some it's honest misunderstanding, for others it's a convenient argument B) It's because of the Puritan ethic that still exists in some parts of American culture. Even a lot of feminists are conservative when it comes to these kinds of dating issues, because there's a general view that women are especially in need of being protected. Also IMO American cities are too spread out and car-centric, and public transportation is largely crap. So teenagers in general don't have the opportunity to…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 07:11 PM

"This just in: drinking orange juice will melt your esophagus"
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 11:23 PM
2

If you don't believe they are fully mentally mature or capable of proper judgment then you should have a problem with that, in principle
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 11:14 PM
1

I was referring to a different commenter
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 11:08 PM

Maybe so but I will say that a lot of black guys actually do look pretty decent with the bald look. So probably not the most egregious example
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 10:43 PM
2

Huh? Raising the age of consent is what OP is saying these people should be doing if they were consistent in the belief that your brain doesn't fully develop until 25. I'm saying that the brain argument is something that gets brought up nearly every time people have this discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 10:39 PM
2

Nope. Varying degrees of inconvenience and expectation. You can't possibly know the degree of inconvenience unless you actually interact with the person first. Every woman is different and people aren't mind readers. “Functioning human beings” know when to get out of someone’s way. Approaching a woman and politely taking no for an answer easily fulfills the condition of knowing when to get out of someone's way.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 10:28 PM
3

You're missing the fundamental point. ANY social interaction you instigate carries a risk of being at someone else's expense. Without exception. Making platonic small talk with a stranger could piss them off inside, maybe they had a bad day and don't feel like talking to you about the weather. Starting any conversation carries a risk that someone might be uncomfortable or unwilling without your knowledge and intent. The whole point of healthy socializing is knowing when to back off, but also hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 10:19 PM
1

so the drinking and voting being raised would not affect their freedoms therefore? Yes you're technically right. Actually I'd say it seems like 50/50 Gen Z and older people who really push that argument. However a lot of people over 25 (mostly political liberals) oppose raising the voting age even though they're not personally affected. So by protecting their personal freedoms they mean (and I'm more referring to) the general principle of not having your rights infringed upon.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 10:13 PM
4

It's not just pickup artists. They forgot to mention that psychologists and therapists use exposure therapy to help patients suffering from social disorders. "Not everyone you meet in life is going to like you, but just because someone dislikes you or finds you discomforting doesn't mean you did something wrong" is one of the core tenets. Basically don't overthink things and mind-read the worst possible interpretation of someone else's surface reaction towards you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 10:05 PM
1

Yeah they don't protest because it would backfire on their personal freedoms. Trying to argue that people aren't real grown adults until their prefrontal cortexes fully develop would make people reconsider the wisdom of letting "children" under 25 with undeveloped brains run around drinking alcohol and voting.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 10:01 PM
1

Yeah my bad I just edited my comment to add "More generally people want to be able to vote and drink before 25, so it serves their interests to be inconsistent about when someone is and isn't an adult." There's two definitions at work here: the "new" legal age and the "moral age gap range"
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 09:49 PM
3

That's absolutely what's being said. The whole "brain development at 25" thing is one of the most common talking points on this issue
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 09:47 PM
1

They absolutely should but many critics won't because fundamentally they know they can't accurately define where the boundaries of a creepy age gap begin numbers-wise. It's a subjective "ick" feeling they can't quantify and thus can't fully justify. These people (often couples with small 4-5 year age gaps shaming other couples with 10+ year age gaps) want to have their cake and eat it too because committing to a clear definition can backfire on themselves. Since there's always someone more conse…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 09:37 PM

Lol that's a good one
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 06:33 PM

Yeah it's just that there are few particular topics where that in group bias is...especially strong lol
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 06:33 PM

Lotta people in this sub who are against generalizations seem strangely okay with AWALT and AMALT the minute they start talking about age gaps. It's like an oddly specific twilight zone where critical thinking goes to die.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 06:21 PM

You're disproving your own point. If the only indication of an age gap being toxic is you looking at just the ages then that's not an indication at all, it's an assumption. THAT would be taking the easy way out and picking the low hanging fruit, instead of actually asking questions and looking at their personalities and histories before giving advice. Regardless, thinking 100% of large age gaps are bad because you or a girl you know once dated a toxic older guy makes no sense. Just like thinking…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 06:03 PM

Lol you serious? They're "silent" because any good or neutral age gap post on any relationship/dating advice sub gets downvoted to hell because people won't believe OP is a trustworthy narrator unless their opinion about their age gap is bad. Also shaming a taboo makes people hesitant to talk about it unless they're in trouble (surprise!) If OP is the older guy: "You're lying and you're a creep, you know your relationship is bad that's why you're asking on Reddit" (despite the purpose of the sub…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:46 PM

I dunno, there's a lot of serious discussion on Reddit Besides if it's not that serious then you should be giving your advice to the women getting offended by "whore" and "whale as well. They're just jokes right?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:41 PM

I said older men trying to date younger women my age is creepy, predatory, and creepy. What does "trying to date" even mean? Trying can be harmless (he made the first move and they clicked) or it can actually be creepy and manipulative (he followed/stalked/pressured her until she gave in). Even older men themselves claim they don’t have good intentions with younger women. Okay? They don't speak for all older men. If these same older men claimed they DID have good intentions would you believe the…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:36 PM

You just said older men who date much younger women are predatory, creepy, and disgusting, without even qualifying the statement. Even saying "many older men" would be a step closer to good-faith, kind of meaningless as a general description but still logically defensible. Are dads who warn their young daughters about older men and their often degenerate intentions with younger women more liking to think in broad brush generalizations too. A lot of them are, a lot of parents are over-protective …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:23 PM

This attitude of "they do shitty things so I should be allowed to do them too" is confusing and childish to me. If those men are assholes for disrespecting fat women like that they why would you imitate the behavior of an asshole you think is an asshole? Wouldn't that also make you...the very thing that you criticize? Unless you're totally cool with them calling fat women "whales" and have never spoken up about that. In which case then yeah I guess you wouldn't be a hypocrite, just an asshole.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:13 PM

Probably that you're prone to thinking in broad brush generalizations and in a way that's not too different from right-wingers who think gay people or minorities are disgusting because of one gay or black person they met who gave them a bad impression
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:08 PM

Suggesting that all women who want a large age gap are sugar babies is also a strawman Lack of nuance goes both ways on this topic
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:02 PM

"Men over 30 = 'grandpas'" is just the female version of "women hit the wall at 30"
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 05:00 PM

Don't forget Many PPD women: "Large age gaps are super rare, I don't know any women my age who like guys the second they hit 30, it's just a male revenge fantasy lolol Also many PPD women: "Large age gaps are toxic and manipulative, it's ok to generalize because there are countless anecdotal examples from me and women I know who were manipulated by much older men they dated"
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 04:56 PM

That's not the point lol Women's biggest complaint is that they have lots of options but have to sift through them to find the "good" ones. Picking out "quality" from quantity takes time and effort, and shaming age gaps benefits these women by decreasing that effort. So even if these older men aren't in your pool (speaking from hindsight) you don't know that just by looking at them, so they still take up your mental energy and time to weed out. Hence why many older women subconsciously find an i…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 04:48 PM
1

You can't always grow hair back. And again it's not usually youth for youth's sake. It's more about how attractive you look, which is not strictly correlated to age and relatively sustainable with good habits and diet. If anything the most superficial preference (weak qualification) is someone's starting level of physical attractiveness independent of age and gender. That's the genetic wild card that no one has any amount of control over. But that's true of virtually any relationship that wasn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/23 07:17 AM
2

Do you honestly think old women are trying to get with old men, getting rejected, so then shaming the old man hoping that will make him become attracted to her? Shaming isn't meant to make the specific individual attracted to you, it's meant to change the culture so the odds of that happening to you again are lower. It's like short incels who complain about women overlooking them for tall men. You can't change the past but you can try to influence how women think in the aggregate.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/23 07:06 AM
-1

I mean along with this most recent comment you seem to be pretty strongly suggesting that age preferences are more immoral because the end result is that men will inevitably ditch their younger partners when they turn 25-30 like they have no self control. That's like saying women who prefer men with thick vibrant hair will inevitably leave them if said men started balding a few years into the relationship. It's a rather selective lack of faith in the idea that someone might only care about super…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/23 06:57 AM
2

That's not a moral argument in favor of women being "less superficial" about height than men are about age, it only happens to work in their favor that men don't shrink fast enough within 10 years to call out a woman for leaving her man because he's now shorter than her in heels. It's like saying "I'd donate my money to charity if I won the lottery," it's meaningless virtue signaling because no one can prove you wrong within an observable time frame anyway. By the time men become noticeably shor…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/23 06:37 AM

I mean they'll admit it but you have to ask them directly
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 03:16 AM

Some do but most women don't IME they're just coy about it
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 01:35 AM

"Good personality" is kinda vague and also relative to her standards by definition
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 01:04 AM
5

Does that mean guys get to start doing funny dances in front of women birds to get their attention?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 12:57 AM

The looks part is usually unspoken because it's understood
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 12:49 AM

Oh they're growing them for sure
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 12:42 AM

:'(
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/23 08:59 PM

How do you wink and frown at the same time
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/23 08:52 PM
1

If you persist in assuming someone has ulterior motives in spite of evidence and statements to the contrary then it's not a simple "misunderstanding." I'm addressing specific examples I've encountered not saying it's intentional or malicious in every case where the word "ulterior" is used.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 09:53 PM
2

More like intentional misrepresentation. And the relevant fact that a lot of the same "ulterior motives" become acceptable motives depending on the identity of the person being judged. There's a lot of in-group bias with respect to the term's usage so IMO it's not really one that can be used responsibly or meaningfully in a forum like PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 09:21 PM
2

"Suspecting" doesn't change the basic meaning of the thing you are suspecting. Sure but again I'm making a point about its usage rather than its definition. Especially since the title of the post is a direct invitation to reevaluating the societal interpretation of the word's meaning. Kind of like the word "literally." People won't always be precise and include the "suspecting" part, that was an explicit example to illustrate the uncertainty that comes along with ascribing ulterior motives. To r…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 08:58 PM
0

From the Cambridge Dictionary He claims he just wants to help Lisa but I suspect he has an ulterior motive In that example sentence you can't say the motive is "hidden" as a general statement of fact because whether it even exists in the first place is simply the speaker "suspecting" instead of actually knowing
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 08:13 PM
1

I'm not giving an exclusive definition of the word so much as pointing out how it's used in popular discourse. If it's defined as going beyond what's "openly said" then there's an element of assuming what their motives are, unless you personally know them or you can read their mind. In the context of anonymous online discussions about dating the word "ulterior" is obviously going to be misused very often based on the speaker's assumptions about the person they're talking about. That's my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 08:09 PM
4

Motives are ulterior if they are hidden Not always. Motives need only be assumed to be deemed "ulterior." Often the person ascribing the motive is an uninvolved critic with no way of knowing
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 07:28 PM
1

Because some pitbulls end up protecting you from your kids too
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 06:32 PM
3

Ime when people talk about "not having much in common" it's college vs. post-college life. Sure but then you'd expect those people to consistently apply that logic to small age gaps that also straddle said college boundary. So a 22 year old still in college dating a 24 year old out of college with their own degree/job/place should also be morally wrong to them because of their different life stages.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 06:13 PM
3

I mean your own use of "most people" and "probably" admits of the possibility that becoming famous isn't enough to change everyone's mind. Personally I can think of people I wouldn't consider dating even if they did become a celebrity. Real life isn't a fairytale and attraction isn't a perfect checklist or some kind of vending machine where you can get what you want if you just insert enough coins. It's more complex than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 02:06 AM
4

But someone can simply not be attracted to you despite you being conventionally attractive and without flaws. They could simply see you in a platonic way because they're used to those kinds of interactions with you over a long time. That doesn't mean there's something wrong with either of you. Lack of attraction is like a square peg in a round hole, there's nothing to "fix" short of being a fundamentally different person.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 01:48 AM
3

You can't always improve your way into being someone's "type." Physical features like height, eye color, etc. are part of the same group of preferences like race and sex that you can't change.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 01:25 AM
20

But what percentage of that 45% will have voluntarily chosen to be single and childless (and be okay with it)? That's the part I'm interested in
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 04:34 AM
9

Wow I didn't know 3 billion men live in the same house
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 04:25 AM
1

That looks like an office phone, she's slacking on the job
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 02:37 AM
1

Way to assume that I don't also think some men have no obvious physical flaws as well lol That said your example roast does bring up an interesting point though, that physical flaws can be subjective (between individuals or genders). Like some people (especially women) might notice the tiniest details about someone's "atrocious" eyebrows or lashes, but personally I would not even consider that a flaw on a man or a woman because those aren't features I spend a lot of time lot of time focusing on.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 06:13 PM
2

"Looking good is, like, a full time job"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 05:36 PM
2

How would you roast someone who doesn't have any obvious physical flaws? You'd still end up having to make something up about them having a "weird nose" despite their nose being perfectly normal. Which makes no sense and defeats the purpose
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 05:32 PM
8

This post isn't even factually correct, lots of people hate on age gaps and age preferences even if the guy with the preference doesn't actually disrespect or insult older women
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 05:27 PM
10

Then perhaps they should use the words "specific asshole" instead of "men"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 05:20 PM
8

I just didn’t touch on the age gap argument cause the point isn’t about age gaps, its about how one presents their preferences. Either way the age gap thing categorically disproves the claim that "people don't care about your preferences if you present them nicely." Like full stop. I mention Leo because again it disproves your claim, but also because it's easier to work with an example people have actually heard of instead of "my neighbor Joe from down the street." But if you've spent any time o…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 04:41 PM
8

Your point clearly doesn't apply for the age preference thing, a lot of people will shit on age gaps they don't approve of just from the ages alone and without knowing anything about the older guy. Also I've never heard of DiCaprio once saying an unkind word about older women being "gross" or "used up," so that should have been the first obvious counter-example in your mind that this idea of karmic justice when it comes to other people judging or not judging your dating preferences is total BS.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 04:32 PM

I dunno that picture seems way too flattering for a mere mortal
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/23 06:37 PM

Right, so the person who wants to communicate verbally or nonverbally to express their discomfort should do so. And if they can't effectively do so because they feel intimidated then it's not their fault but it's not the other person's fault either, in most cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 06:46 PM

That's kind of a circular argument though. How would someone know in the first place that you perceive them a certain way for them to stop acting that way? Read your mind? It's not like every situation is a clear-cut case of "don't ever do this thing on a date," there's often ambiguity involved. Keep in mind we're not arguing the super obvious situations where you could immediately say "dude don't do that." Or at least I'm not.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 06:38 PM

Right, so who's fault is it that the message isn't being communicated or heard?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 06:30 PM

Yes there is nonverbal communication as well, sometimes it's obvious and sometimes it's not. The problem we're addressing is: if someone doesn't successfully communicate that they're uncomfortable in a situation, who's fault is it that the other person doesn't get the message? Person A, person B, both or neither?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 05:52 PM

"They thought and felt it was grape the whole time" The question is did they do more than simply just think and feel...and actually communicate their discomfort to the guy at the time? That's what people usually mean by "revoking consent," is that there was lack of direct communication on the part of the woman who felt uncomfortable. And that's how you end up with two different and incompatible "his" and "her" versions of the event, Rashomon style.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 07:36 AM

How do you know the ones who aren't holding hands aren't struggling? How would you even be able to confidently say that you've never seen any single guys you know "being desperate"? What does that even look like and more importantly why would they willingly make themselves look desperate and vulnerable in front of you? Also with random people in public just because they're holding hands doesn't mean they're actually a couple. They might just be on an early date that may not even make it to the r…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 07:04 AM

How can you tell whether someone is struggling just from looking at them? Unless they're willing to share with you something so private about themselves. Even comedians suffer from depression but you'd probably never know that unless they told you.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 05:40 AM
1

Not all couples are married though so he's not necessarily wrong
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 04:14 AM
1

That's the average for married couples, not all relationships + casual interactions. People tend to experiment before they settle down. And people who are in more unconventional relationships are less likely to get married and more likely to just cohabitate.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 02:16 AM

You can live any lifestyle on seven figures depending on how much you're willing to spend
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 09:06 PM

Your scenario of the guy who only dates younger women because he actually hates women his age for sexist reasons is a very specific incel-esque scenario that makes a whole host of moral assumptions about similar age gaps where such bad intentions don't exist. Notice you're making a lot of unsourced quantitative claims about "most" of these situations being a certain way and "rarely" involving good men. Even if I grant that's true it still doesn't absolve the moral issue of speaking of all such a…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 08:21 PM

Not necessarily, whether the woman pursues him or not is dependent on how easily she is influenced by the shaming.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 08:08 PM

Of course shaming works, otherwise people wouldn't bother to engage in it if it weren't at least somewhat effective on some people. It's not the only reason that deters people, but it's the one artificial (intentional and manmade) barrier that shouldn't exist in a society that claims to consistently abhor bigotry.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 07:47 PM

Except the sentiment usually appears in the form of "I think it's gross so it shouldn't be okay for anyone, that's why I'm bothering to verbalize my opinion unsolicited instead of keeping it to myself." And "have at it" usually implies that we assume that a perfect stranger isn't a predator without actual evidence or personal knowledge. It's not a blank check for any bad behavior or motivations.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 07:37 PM

Sure but "I think it's gross so it's not okay" is another slippery slope that has even less structural integrity
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 07:31 PM

It helps her image that she comes across as very wishy washy about her beliefs and not very aggressive in her criticisms of other people at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 07:29 PM

Just search for #notallmen on Reddit or Twitter or platform of your choice. Plenty of examples
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 07:15 PM

Mockery of the phrase #Notallmen is very common on social media and an example of the left policing "tone policing" and forsaking sensitivity and accuracy in the service of making a point about the toxic masculinity of certain men. All the while demanding the same sensitivity from their opponents.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 07:05 PM
4

There's also a spectrum between acceptably shy for a guy and extremely awkward and socially weird. So in your friend's case it's probably benign enough where most women will just interpret it as mysterious or strong and silent.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 06:56 PM
7

I kinda go back and forth on this. I think if you're that attractive as a dude it's equally likely for women to give you a pass and ignore your red flags as it would be for them to be turned off by extreme social awkwardness. Like it would probably depend on whether the prospect of dating a guy out of her league is a novelty for the particular woman or if she's already been there and done that.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/23 06:04 PM

How can mirrors be real if our eyes aren't real?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 07:38 PM
4

How is it not said as advice if it's their actual opinion and meant to change their behavior?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 07:36 PM
3

Lol you're concern trolling about "ableism" when you're the one who can't stop spewing ageist vitriol and assumptions. And yes ageism is a concept that has been popular in the discourse at least as long as ableism ever was.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 07:28 PM
8

"Stop bothering women" is certainly something spoken by many women (for obvious reasons) and counterproductive to the red pill idea of approaching as many women as possible to acquire "abundance" (for obvious reasons).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 07:08 PM
7

Yeah that's not a very good friend. To be clear I'm not suggesting that people should stop taking risks in life for fear of being perceived in the wrong light. Only that someone looking for a cure-all for their social problems should temper their expectations about how objectively well received or broadly agreed upon the idea of a "confident" person actually is.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 06:46 PM
1

No "choice" involved, these are comments explicitly made by some women. I have no reason to assume that they're lying
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 06:36 PM
32

You can build confidence that's not "supported" by your life circumstances or your appearance, but there's a chance that people will interpret it as delusion or lack of self awareness or cringe. For instance women who are overweight might have the confidence to wear revealing clothing, but it may not be perceived as confidence by other people or men specifically. In that situation you could either argue "good for her" (because she doesn't care) or "sucks for her" (because she should probably sta…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 07:53 AM
2

I know you know that's not the point. The crux of this discussion is that men and women shouldn't assume the other side is lying when they're explicitly telling you their opinions in a debate forum. Good-faith discussion and all that. That said, you do agree this is a thing that many women assume about men even when the bad intentions don't exist, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 06:27 AM
2

many women who don't give men the benefit of admitting that physical attraction is important to men I'm talking about "do men care about looks." As in, a lot of times when men admit that they date younger women because they find them more physically attractive women will disbelieve them and pretend it's NOT about looks. "Oh you must be dating a younger woman because you want to CONTROL her, no other reason!" And when guys respond "no actually it's about looks, I'm telling you my literal opinion"…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 06:14 AM
2

Yes of course, different people prioritize looks to different degrees. What I'm saying is that, going back to your original point, there are also many women who don't give men the benefit of admitting that physical attraction is important. And instead will try to speak for them as to why they "really" want to date certain women. In other words the mind reading goes both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 05:53 AM
3

The most obvious example is that these women will pretend looks aren't a thing that exists as a motivation when they assume men's intentions for dating younger women, for instance
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 05:26 AM
1

Since unattractive men decided that women don’t have the right to admit that physical attraction is important. Let's be honest, women themselves are often the ones online who pretend that physical attraction isn't a motivation, in certain controversial discussions. Namely because admitting that looks matter reminds these women of their biggest existential fear in dating: the politically incorrect idea that on average they will lose their physical attractiveness over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 05:11 AM
3

How does one objectively determine what level is superficial for them?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 04:56 AM
1

Lol be thankful the criticism for women prioritizing looks stops at "superficial" instead of "predatory." Now that's a whole other level of bad faith assumption that most women have the privilege of sidestepping thanks to certain societal stereotypes working in their favor.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/23 04:51 AM

Quiet nights of quiet stars Quiet chords from my guitar Floating on the silence that surrounds us ​ Quiet thoughts and quiet dreams Quiet walks by quiet streams And a window that looks out on Corcovado Oh how lovely...
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/23 04:37 AM
3

I understand what you're saying and I agree that happens. But these hot men are creepy because they act in definably creepy ways, in spite of and not because of their looks. Whereas point #2 was about unattractive guys being seen as creepy for doing something innocuous like a polite approach that a hot guy would get a pass for. To put it differently, the focal point of terms like "creepy-looking" is primarily about attractiveness, not rude behavior. And "don't be a creep"/"stay in your league" o…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/23 10:39 PM
2

I should clarify that I'm referring to a societal perception of "creepiness" and not necessarily the particular individual man/woman's perception of creepiness. Since creepiness is often a social conversation. Generally speaking the "leagues" thing is something that other observers say about two people and not themselves about each other. Same with the second point, I mean that the corresponding terms addressing young/hot creeps aren't nearly as popular (or even really used that much) in the dis…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/23 10:11 PM
6

Your second point actually contradicts itself because many people will interpret "commonsense appropriateness" as somehow dictating that being older than your target or being in a lower "league" than them is creepy. ("Stay in your lane!") Also you rarely hear the phrase "creepy young guy" or "creepy hot guy" despite womens' insistence that young/hot guys can also be creepy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/23 09:49 PM
1

while the older man is only attracted to her only because of her looks. Yes that's often the case where the "something else" is being used by the older man to mislead. And that leads to the stereotype that all such age gaps are manipulative. Group stereotypes are powerful precisely because they are true for some people in the group. Not every person, but also not "no person." However what's also often the case is that the older man might also genuinely be attracted to things like the woman's car…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/23 06:14 PM
1

Of course, but to assume that the "something else" doesn't also come into play for age gap relationships over time is to assume that the distinction between these and "normal" relationships is black-and-white instead of a spectrum. Or that on an individual level there is even a distinction sometimes between those two in terms of "why am I dating them?"
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/23 05:14 PM
0

So the poster using an argument that nobody has made isn't a strawman, but me using an argument that people make all the time is a strawman. Did you actually read my comment or is English your fifth language
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/23 05:09 PM
2

You used that statement "Men in their 30s shouldn't be trying to date literal teenagers." as the argument of choice to represent the entirety of age gap criticism. In the same way you point out that ppd_alt is misrepresenting age gap criticism with their "same birthday logic." So in calling out a straw man you mirrored them and made your own straw man. The question is whether you're too proud to back down now or if you're willing to admit "yeah you're probably right."
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/23 05:04 PM
2

That kind of "misrepresentation" exists with same age relationships though. Wife: What made you interested in me when we first met? Husband: I really liked your...intelligence Are you pretending that for the vast majority of people their baseline motivation for getting with someone is something other than the fact they were initially physically attracted to them? Or are we going to pretend that "looks matter" isn't a thing but only when we're talking about age gap relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/23 04:58 PM
5

"Men in their 30s shouldn't be trying to date literal teenagers." Lol your own example is a strawman of the discourse around age gaps. You know full well that criticism of age gaps does not stop once the younger person is no longer a "literal teenager." In fact the whole issue around it is that what constitutes a "creepy" age gap is entirely subjective and undefinable. Not to mention people will often make exceptions based on personal bias.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/23 04:52 PM

6 and 9 years
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/23 12:41 AM
3

Yeah wtf that level of hypocrisy is beyond obnoxious and actually dangerous. Hopefully they're not here because the authorities had a nice long talk with them... To be fair I've encountered a few PPD women who are respectably logical and consistent on the consenting age gap thing, but sometimes it does feel like they're a minority. I kinda get it though, being vocal on a controversial issue is not easy if you're on the "pro" side because it's an invitation to becoming a target for baseless insul…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 07:55 PM
1

Not all old people are manipulative and creepy but old people who actually go ahead and date barely legal fresh out of high school partners are statistically way more likely to be manipulative and creepy. Sure, but we all know the dangers of using group statistics to make character assumptions about individuals within the group. Even more so when you're not personally involved and just observing as a stranger with no information. I think you might have more a point sticking to 18 specifically as…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 07:09 PM
5

"Well duh, this pop culture age gap formula we came up with is totally scientific and never wrong!"
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 05:48 PM

true
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 05:45 PM

If the taboo didn't exist there'd be even more cheaters
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 05:26 PM
19

A lot of liberals/progressives selectively turn into conservatives on the issue of age gap relationships. All of a sudden they forget about "let people love who they love" and "it's nunya business what happens in my bedroom," and seemingly either don't notice the inconsistency or don't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 05:22 PM
14

I think it's fair to be concerned about women fresh out of high school I agree, if it's someone you actually care about in real life and not just virtue signaling about internet strangers. Also people like to play fast and loose with the definition of "fresh out of high school." The only 22 year olds fresh out of high school are the ones who had to repeat high school.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 05:11 PM
5

"Who cares" is a totally different argument from "no one's batting an eye (trust me)" I agree that people should adopt an attitude of not caring so much about other people, but that goes both ways. Meaning the people making bigoted judgments and assumptions about strangers' relationships have the responsibility of not acting shitty.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 05:08 PM
4

100 percent the 30 year old. He will have way more world knowledge and ability to manipulate the situation than some dumb 18 year old guy will. Ability to manipulate is based on your personality and your character, not your age. Crime rates are the highest among the 18-25 male demographic. Plenty of phone scammers are young people who fool the elderly into sending them cash. You're assuming that the older you get the better liar you become, or that life experience in a certain area that you don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/23 04:59 PM

The point is that it's odd for people to be okay with giving the vote to someone who's brains they believe aren't even fully developed
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 06:35 PM

the very real distinction between creeps like DiCaprio and the celebrity women who are in a 10-ish year age gap relationship versus men who are in a 20-ish year age gap relationship? "very real distinction" Can you define and justify, precisely and in numerical terms, where that distinction lies? I promise you can't. The whole point of the double standard is that people can't agree on where the line for a "creepy" gap begins, and that people will often change their definitions based on the gende…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 04:55 PM
11

Yup. No one cared when he was in his 30's. I wouldn't say no one but relatively fewer people than now. But to be fair that's because age gap discourse wasn't this extreme 10-15 years ago. That's apples and oranges. Plenty of people on social media nowadays think a guy in his 30s dating 20 year old women is creepy. But the reverse scenario typically gets a stamp of approval because "you go girl, the wall isn't real!"
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 07:16 AM
8

How about Kate Beckinsale 43, Matt Rife 21 (22 years) Kate Beckinsale 46, Goody Grace 22 (24 years) Unlike DiCaprio she actually has a daughter their age But not a peep about her being cReEpY and no fancy bar chart chronicling her "degeneracy"
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 07:12 AM
0

Lol it's not, we know this because the social media criticism existed when they first discovered he was dating this woman around this time last year before she got pregnant
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 07:03 AM
12

How about Kate Beckinsale 43, Matt Rife 21 Kate Beckinsale 46, Goody Grace 22 Unlike DiCaprio she actually has a daughter their age But not a peep about her being cReEpY and no fancy bar chart chronicling her "degeneracy"
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 06:09 AM
-1

How do any of those examples disprove the point that men generally get more shit for dating young women than vice versa? You'd have to make a comparative argument that also acknowledges similar "exceptions" granted to a women Clooney's age dating men about 17 years younger. Of which there are many.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 06:01 AM
1

Yep, gotta think in powers of ten
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 05:44 AM
2

Right they're still giving him shit though, so OP's point still stands. Also the thing about visceral grossness is that it's someone's subjective opinion and has very little to do with moral character. Lots of people think fat people are viscerally gross, as do lots of conservatives think gay couples are viscerally gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 05:37 AM
22

A lot of people on social media are giving Al Pacino shit, that's not a great example
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/23 01:41 AM
3

I've already conceded the second point, but you ignored the first part of my response and still haven't addressed your main argument where you seem to assume the intentions of the man in an age gap by framing it as "taking advantage" of the younger woman and something worth being annoyed by. That's objectively wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 04:17 AM
1

I'm annoyed about how many young women get taken advantage of and how normalized taking advantage of young women is. Except you omitted the part of my quote "What's there to be annoyed about, unless you're jealous." that says "where two people freely choose each other." There's not really an argument in your favor unless you (wrongly) assume just from an age difference that there's any "taking advantage" going on in the first place. You misunderstand- I was just using that as an example of men n…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 03:55 AM
1

The default assumption it it has to be thought about is usually that the younger man is still an adult man capable of making his own decisions. It's a combination of the sexist impulse to protect young adult women and view them as "children," along with the kind of societal sexism that's suspicious of men around children (and "children").
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 02:26 AM
6

We're annoyed not just about the couple itself, but also the consistency. That would be like bitter men being annoyed by the fact that women worldwide "consistently" date taller men. It's different people with their own preferences out of a population of billions, not the same person. "Consistency" isn't really the right word. Also annoyance isn't the right emotion. What's there to be annoyed about regarding a relationship where two people freely choose each other, unless you're jealous. As for …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/23 02:13 AM

Before the Neolithic revolution, men and women worked together hunting and gathering as nomads. Exactly, together. Who do you think did the physical labor of lifting heavy things? How can you say women can survive without men if there are no historical examples of women doing that?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/23 10:31 PM

Yes that's because men also existed throughout history...
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/23 09:49 PM
2

No, I am the troll!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/23 05:10 PM

The basketball gods are merciless. Thou shalt not come back from 0-3 indeed
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/23 03:13 AM

It's crazy how the Heat are seen as the underdogs now, you'd think the historical 0-3 statistic would carry more weight
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/23 10:41 PM

That's because people who are obese/overweight are more likely to avoid going to a beach
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/23 10:37 PM
6

For most my life I thought I was the most hideous human being to ever walk the earth. However, later on during college I decided to give OLD a try. I took some more high end photos and I was genuinely shocked at my experience was. It's possible you had an ugly duckling phase and then became attractive as you got older.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/23 05:59 PM

People have a moral obligation to live a healthy lifestyle. Even more so once you have kids. Generally the trend is that people get fat and let themselves go after they get married and settle down. But it should be the opposite because once you have a life partner and a family you kind of owe it to them as well to stay healthy and fit for as long as you can.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/23 07:18 PM

my dad only wants to see lions and basically won’t let us see anything else This is hilarious to me for some reason "I said NO monkeys!!"
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/23 06:46 PM
5

Being embarrassed to be seen with someone in public is different from not wanting them. Hiding your preferences doesn't change the fact that they're still your preferences. In fact you could say the desire is even "stronger" because you're chasing it in spite of the social ostracism. It's "easy" to desire someone who other people are already cool with and have given you the green light of approval.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/23 06:22 PM
2

Qualitative data is important, but being able to interpret them accurately and meaningfully and sniff out bad experimental design is even more important.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/23 06:20 PM
7

On OLD? Sure, women have seemingly limitless options. So they can afford to think in terms of potential and not population level statistics. In real life there's a huge factor that comes into play called "accessibility." Meaning, you're more likely to value things that are easily accessible and familiar to you. And since women tend to play the "passive" role in the early stages of dating and approaching, this factor is even more relevant. Ever heard of the "office hot" phenomenon? A woman might …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/23 05:08 PM

Oh I wasn't suggesting physically attractive = high quality, I said they were the most desirable. Which is empirically true since more guys tend to desire and chase the most physically attractive women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 10:43 PM

Yeah I wouldn't call them famous though Also believe it or not they don't all monetize their looks or post on IG
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 10:32 PM

Desirable as in very physically attractive women who aren't celebrities, I'm sure you've seen a few in your lifetime just from walking around in public
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 10:24 PM

I wouldn't know their names, they're not famous
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 10:20 PM

Demographic pill is strong and many of those famous, high status guys are more or less limited to women in the entertainment industry Not at all, a lot of famous athletes/celebrities end up with the most desirable women who aren't the least bit famous. Even Twitch streamers lol You can transcend the demographic pill by virtue of being well-known, that's what being famous involves. Your new dating demographic essentially becomes "anyone who's heard of you and is a huge fan," so basically limitles…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 10:10 PM

Agreed but it's not an either-or decision, it's increasing your dating pool in an additive way by not artificially limiting yourself on one variable. There are multiple ways to increase your odds, you can pursue a relatively lower number of "high probability" options or a high number of "lower probability" ones. Or both, like I'm suggesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 06:32 PM

Yeah all these things might happen, which is why I mention potential. Dating and relationships are a game of odds anyway, there are no certainties even if you're young and fit.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 06:06 PM

Degrees and jobs are relatively abundant, but women the same age as you (relatively) and at the same life stage as you are not. Same life stage doesn't always mean same relative age though. And the social taboo against age-disparate relationships creates a lack of abundance but it's an artificially induced lack of abundance. Which is to say it's more of a mental obstacle that you have the potential to overcome rather than an option that's forever closed to you, to a certain extent.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 05:48 PM

Yeah that's what I thought too, conventionally middle age was defined as between 40 or 45, and that was when the life expectancy was even lower than it is now. Apparently social media seems to have shortened the time between generations. Either that or it's fashionable nowadays for young people to exaggerate anything nearing 30 as being an old dinosaur. Kinda like a platonic version of "The Wall" but somehow socially acceptable because it's slightly more equal opportunity bashing.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 05:37 PM

I've noticed 30s is like the Twilight Zone for age where it can be both "young" and "old" at the same time depending on what narrative requires its use in a discussion about gender dynamics or "the Wall" or age gaps. Also "middle age = 30s" is a very interesting modern development
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 04:36 PM
7

So then simply saying "don't approach" when they actually mean what you just explained in great detail is still too vague to be useful for guys who are confused enough to ask for advice in the first place. Omitting all that (fairly critical) detail seems like a deliberate choice
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/23 07:50 PM
10

Right so then maybe it shouldn't pass for dating advice. The point of advice is usually to help the person you're advising, not to tip the scales in your own favor lol
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/23 07:27 PM
11

So maybe the larger point is "don't give dating advice as a woman if you know that men will be less successful by following it" lol At best you could call it strategic, at worst deceptive
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/23 07:21 PM
11

From a common sense POV sure. But presumably if these women are warning men against approaching them then the whole point is that they expect these rules to be followed. Otherwise the frustration and anger in their comments makes no sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/23 07:12 PM
25

Because in theory it decreases the "quality" of their options, since now the only guys who will approach them are going to be the ones less likely to follow rules and boundaries in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/23 06:52 PM
16

I'd say these women are hurting other women by cautioning guys against approaching. Namely, women with a certain disdain for public approaches projecting their preferences onto women who like the confidence of a guy who approaches her. In that sense these women are essentially throwing other women under the bus by shaming approach culture and removing a viable avenue for people to meet organically in real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/23 06:46 PM
1

You see it a lot here when the discussion is about a hot-button, controversial topic
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/23 10:33 PM
8

As problematic as 4chan-adjacent culture can be they do come up with the funniest shit sometimes
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/23 10:24 PM
4

There's a saying about that which goes something like "Hot people are their own race" Taken figuratively it means that people tend to compile their list of standards and dealbreakers with average partners in mind. Even strict requirements like "I don't date [certain ethnicities]" tend to become flexible and negotiable if the potential partner is incredibly attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/23 10:16 PM
1

6 is within average range. I don't think most people would take it as a compliment if you rated them a 6.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/23 06:21 AM
2

That's a weird assumption. A 6/10 is average, and average guys by definition aren't going to attract attention because they're ordinary looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/23 05:51 AM
4

This is only true for Redpill content creators and their diehard fans, not "men." Most guys with common sense will realize that the average woman isn't getting "flown out to Dubai."
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/23 01:36 AM
1

Huh? I'm saying there are people who give that kind of advice and also express annoyance at being bothered by awkward/nervous guys in public. You can identify hypocrisy from someone's self-contradicting online opinions without having met them.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/23 10:29 PM
1

I was talking about online advice though, hence the "if we met in real life" part
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/23 08:57 PM
2

Social skills involve talking to people in real life, not interacting with them online. Also someone shutting down potential conversation by being curt with you doesn't lend itself to practicing conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/23 08:41 PM
8

Not at all, people often give simplistic,, one-liner advice out of impatience to shut the person up, or because they don't feel like putting effort into a more comprehensive answer. So more like "advice" because it's often a gotcha in the guise of advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/23 06:41 PM
7

Problem is when people often give advice to guys like "work on your social skills first" what they mean is something more like "work on your social skills first...but not on me." As in, be an awkward/creepy problem somewhere else to someone else, but not in a way where I have to personally deal with your inexperience if we met in real life. And also don't be awkward or creepy while you're learning and practicing how to be less awkward or creepy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/23 06:12 PM
1

Yep, competency often takes time to build, and men are generally valued for their competency.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/23 06:04 PM
0

Not only are relationships transactional, relationships are often transactional in ways that you can't control for. So it isn't just a list of steps you can fulfill to ensure stability by providing value. If your gf is being harassed by another dude (or a home intruder) and you either get your ass kicked trying to confront him or fail to confront him then there's a real possibility she might instantly lose her attraction for you, despite that scenario being relatively uncommon and something you'…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/23 05:58 PM
16

Depends on your looks. A lot of guys with baby faces grow into them in their late 20s or even late 30s. At the very least there's certainly a lot of ethnic variation with regard to "looking young/your age." Confidence is the most important intangible quality for guys in dating alongside social skills, and it's not outlandish to assume that a lot of guys will become more confident in their 30s than in their 20s for a variety of reasons (but also possibly due to the earlier mentioned development o…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/23 09:14 PM

I went to twox and all of the upvoted take/ supported and defended the woman. Not not "all" this is a blatant lie smh Also I cited it in my first paragraph of my first reply. The way you worded it. And you brought up Emmett Till. You...do understand what the concept of indirectly quoting someone is right? That Emmett Till reference wasn't my own
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/23 02:57 AM

It's not "race baiting" to point out the irony of #BelieveAll women believing the word of a man over another woman by default because of her supposed privilege Please cite where I used "racially derisive" language or insults before falsely accusing me of doing something I haven't
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/23 02:38 AM

Actual insane takes from 2XC claiming the "bike Karen" was simply using her skin privilege to weaponize her tears, and that she somehow irresponsibly expressed a fear for her well-being because the men who were confronting her could have ended up like Emmett Till Even a sub for women can't stand up for women smh
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/23 11:34 PM

Sounds like a prisoner's dilemma
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/23 10:31 PM

What’s the anger about? Being lied to? Just a guess lol
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/23 10:12 PM
1

Except for age difference, apparently. Then people suddenly pretend like following an arithmetic formula isn't a totally autistic thing to do
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/23 10:03 PM
6

When women give advice like "Don't approach women at this place because we hate it" then just take it with a truckload of salt. Logically it doesn't make sense because there's no way any one woman can speak on behalf of all women.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/23 06:06 PM

Probably, there are a lot of dating/relationship associated subs that they started infiltrating well before the sub got locked down
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 10:33 PM

Sure, it's a good quality and a bonus. But a woman with consistent, lifelong direct personal experience is probably going to have more valuable insight on the topic than a guy who learned from twenty minutes of Googling.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 07:47 PM

Mothers: How to deal with periods, hair issues, certain hairstyles, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 06:53 PM
0

Past experience determines future behavior Yeah, for individuals, not groups lol There's no "collective male brain" That's like me saying ANY woman I date is going to cheat in the future because random ex #1 cheated on me once a few years ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 05:46 PM
1

Sounds like a really exhausting way to live if you're going to red flag entire groups of people because of bad individuals within those groups. That said at least you're consistent on this issue, most people sidestep the profiling double standard by saying "they're not the same."
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 05:37 PM
-2

Do you think this mindset of "eternal vigilance" would be morally justifiable if you replaced gender profiling with racial profiling (based on white people who may or may not have been previously victimized citing similar "statistics" about minority crime), or do you think this kind of defensive sexism against men is the only "-ism" in its own special category that's somehow above criticism?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 05:18 PM
-2

Because these women will mentally distort "90% of attackers are men" into "90% of men are attackers." Not only is it grossly inaccurate but makes the person susceptible to bigotry in their paranoia.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 05:15 PM
1

Agree
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 04:35 AM
1

Sure but I doubt the public would be very happy with the idea of the AoC being just a few years shy of the average age of marriage. Also people in their mid/late 20s want to have their cake (date across small age gaps) and eat it too (complain about large age gaps).
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/23 04:19 AM
1

Most people aren't willing to do that, because they still want to be able to vote at 18.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/23 11:29 PM
6

More like twenty four women if you assume only half the upvotes are from women Also the one woman disagreeing gets voted down
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/23 08:41 PM

You don't think PUA's have standards?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/23 08:26 PM
1

I like how you were skeptical of park but not work lol
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/23 07:11 PM
11

It's because women often treat themselves as a monolith when they give prohibitive dating advice to men online based on their own preferences (but assuming ALL other women share them). Woman A: "Men can you stop approaching women at the bar...they're there to have fun with friends, not to satisfy your ego!" (50 upvotes) ->Woman B: "I know right? The audacity" ->Woman C: "If you have to ask then it's probably a bad idea" ->->Woman D: "Eh personally I'm fine with guys approaching" (0 upvotes) Inex…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/23 07:05 PM
1

If the only scientific basis for concern surrounding age gaps is "brain develops at 25" then the size of the gap shouldn't matter after 25. At best the rule would be "either half your age plus seven, or 25. Whichever is lower."
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/23 06:46 PM

That's pretty much all dating in general. People don't normally have someone super specific in mind (you can't predict the future), but they do have basic standards so I wouldn't call it "anyone."
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/23 06:41 PM
2

It's meant to be in response to the common claim "women like bad boys." I think a better response would try to break them out of the AWALT mentality and say something like "Some women actually do prioritize kindness as a first priority." Because unless the person giving the advice knows you intimately, they can't tell you what you're doing wrong. Which goes to show that giving blind advice to someone, especially if it's unsolicited, is not always a great idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/23 08:34 PM

You said that women care at most about relative height. Clearly that's not true for women who only swipe right on >6 ft dudes on OLD.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/23 08:31 PM

The average woman is only like 5'4", so 6 feet being the male ideal is way too tall to be an average of everyone's height preferences based solely on "I just want a guy tall ENOUGH for me (relatively speaking)."
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/23 08:18 PM

No there certainly exists a preference for absolute height in addition to relative height as well. The perception of 6 feet being considered the threshold for ideal male height is not an idea that could have just materialized by coincidence regardless of the woman's height. (The average woman would have to be like 5'9" for "6 foot tall man" to be considered conventionally attractive only because it's tall enough for her in relative terms.)
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/23 07:54 PM
36

"Women like kind men" isn't a great example because it actually is too broad a generalization to be useful as dating advice. In fact a lot of dating advice is vague, especially the preachy kind that attempts to set rules and prohibitions based on the preferences of the individual giving the advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/23 07:43 PM

The baby doll makes T levels drop, and lower T levels makes it more likely you spend more time with your family, in cyclical fashion. There's actually quite a few studies on the topic floating around the internet but I just picked the article because it was more accessible. I would sooner hypothesize that babies are stressful and having them makes people more stressed, which decreases testosterone. They mention in the article that married men without kids experience the same drop in T levels as …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/23 10:16 PM

It's funny you mention that but married men actually live longer than unmarried men because they have lower testosterone due to the "parenting effect." So again it seems a hormonal explanation is what accounts for the difference. Maybe try having your husband hold babies while he's not lifting? That might prolong his lifespan, who knows
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/23 09:41 PM

Pretty sure women living longer is due to biological and hormonal differences. The whole thing about guys being allergic to the doctor is just anecdotal humor
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/23 09:09 PM

ease of seduction Lol I mean there's also that small and insignificant perk called "privilege of living longer"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/23 08:58 PM
1

I think that you NEED to have common interests because "what else are you going to talk about." Even more specific is the idea that you need to "understand the same pop culture references," that's so weirdly demanding lmao So I guess that means inter-cultural relationships are out of the question then
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/23 08:13 PM

No one should be allowed to give dating advice unless they have a PhD in Pillology
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/23 08:07 PM
6

It would be awesome if this happened more often, one of the most frustrating things about dating (and interviewing) is not knowing if and where you went wrong because people are too hesitant to give feedback.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/23 12:19 AM
1

Creepiness absolutely has to do with looks and attractiveness, there are studies on this. And by looks I mean physical characteristics that have nothing to do with hygiene, dress, or conscious decisions to present yourself a certain controversial way. Not only do the results explicitly demonstrate that a "muscular" guy is less likely to be seen as creepy than an "extremely thin" guy, but they even demonstrate that people are very likely to agree with the statement "Person is creepy, not just beh…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 08:31 PM
1

Creepy behavior might not be subjective, but calling a guy "creepy" IS subjective because the adjective isn't solely based on behavior, but also looks. (Hence the term, creepy-looking.) Not to mention the same innocuous behavior can often be self-justified by the woman being approached as acceptable or creepy depending on her attraction to the guy doing the behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 07:20 PM
1

I don't think this is a very effective gotcha question. Most women don't have to make the first move so they lose nothing by agreeing with you that approaching a guy they like is "creepy." Also guys are more forgiving about not seeing women as creepy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 07:17 PM
0

In varius forums there are women complaining that "cold approach" frightens them and warns not to cold approach. Which doesn't make much sense. This advise is only useful if the audience receiving it are guys who actually know these women in real life. Otherwise what good is respecting femaleUser1's preference not to be cold approached if you have no way of knowing whether the random woman you encounter in public is her or not?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 07:39 AM
3

The best science I can think of is that therapists often advise people with social anxiety to face their fears directly and repeatedly (exposure therapy) by talking to strangers, in order to overcome both the constant overthinking of "what if" and the tendency to catastrophize every interaction as "that person definitely thinks I'm weird/hates me." The point being that you can't go through life afraid of offending people simply because of a pre-imagined result in your mind. Also not everyone you…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 07:07 AM
-1

That's not my position, nor is that analogous to a cold approach
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 06:30 AM
3

You said it's not "immoral to fart loudly at a child's birthday party" you're not even quoting yourself correctly
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 06:12 AM
1

It's neither illegal nor immoral to fart loudly at a child's birthday party. Farting is an essential life process. Exactly, and if you do fart it's not that big a deal. Same with cold approaches. Socializing is a natural activity.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 06:07 AM
1

The way I see it it's not too different from making a friend or making small talk with a stranger. The same common sense restrictions apply, but otherwise there's nothing morally wrong about doing it as long as you're polite. With all of those interactions there's no guarantee it won't be awkward, but just because some old lady in the grocery store line talked your ear off about the weather doesn't mean that old ladies should be shamed from small talk because of your negative experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 06:01 AM
4

The strongest argument you can muster is "it's not illegal?" Pretty sure that was hyperbole, of course it's neither illegal nor immoral nor unnatural to talk to people seeing how human beings are social animals.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 05:56 AM
5

Don't forget that infatuation can make a vice look like a virtue, so these women don't realize that the cost benefit doesn't work in their favor until after the honeymoon period is over (later on in the relationship or when they break up). Or if the guy is good at hiding his vices. It's all about perception.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 01:23 AM
13

For this reason if you have an asshole who does nonetheless have some virtues such as courage, he is a better man than the undeveloped man That's too general, it depends on the virtue and the vice. I don't think a courageous man who beats his woman is better than a neutral guy who does neither of those things. Also the biggest (self-reported) issue that women face in dating is that guys are toxic, selfish, [insert negative adjectives], and that safety is their biggest concern. Not that guys are …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 12:59 AM

There is truth to the statement that at least for guys they don't need girlfriends they just need friends. Either both of those are "needs" or neither of them are
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/23 06:27 PM
1

However my post is mainly talking about how we condemn someone for engaging in a relationship without knowing how we would handle the suturing ourselves. I think there are people who would genuinely avoid workplace romance at all costs and still criticize them at the same time, but you're right there's probably a lot of hypocrites too.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/23 06:40 PM
3

Don't hit on people you work with is one of those dating "rules" which I actually think is a sensible restriction the vast majority of the time, despite it being somewhat popular to violate. You've got the power dynamics involved with boss/subordinate relationships, and even when it's coworkers on the same level you're pretty much stuck with each other if something goes wrong. The only exception is if it's a casual summer job or something where neither person really cares if they get fired or ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/23 06:20 PM

Is this a thing? I'm guessing it's because women who teach little kids tend to be nurturing and patient and easy to get along with. Or at least that's the stereotype.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/23 01:25 AM

I think that's a natural tendency for teens to rebel against their parents. And that each generation thinks the next younger generation is more wild and unrestrained than they were. Although I've heard that Gen Z supposedly breaks this trend in that they're more conservative and prudish than their parents were about propriety and stuff. Don't know what proportion of the population that's actually true for though.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/23 12:04 AM

If by "perfect looking" you mean those shiny-looking mofos on magazine covers with no pores then yes that feels kind of uncanny valley looking. But there are definitely people who pretty much have no imperfections who look attractive in person with facial expressions and everything.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 09:29 PM

Drink more alcohol, the real dating advice
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 09:11 PM
3

By your logic, would you allow an 18 year old to run for the highest office in the land and be your leader in the event they won, since they're just as much of an adult as anyone else. If they had the intelligence and the capacity then yes, without question. And this isn't even a hypothetical because there are many old politicians who voters of the opposing party would absolutely pick a more principled and less mentally incompetent 18 year old over if given the choice in a general election lol (…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 08:42 PM
6

That's disappointing, but not surprising I guess that this very politically convenient view of adulthood exists. "18 year olds are somehow magically responsible and smart enough to make decisions that affect millions of people, but not responsible enough to make decisions on behalf of themselves." Maturity applies across the board, it's not a buffet line where you can pick and choose when you think someone is a grown adult capable of handling the consequences of their choices, but only for issue…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 08:06 PM
3

So do you support raising the voting age to 25 or whatever age you think the brain fully develops?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 07:45 PM
11

Plenty of men are just as disgusted and confused as women when they admit their attractions to teenagers. Do you think many dads in society would like a 30yr old hitting on their 18yr old daughter? Not an effective argument. Plenty of racist white fathers are disgusted by their daughters dating black men. Does that mean their views on interracial relationships are valid? And parents in general are overprotective of their kids doing things they did when they were young. If anything this just demo…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 07:32 PM

Body count is largely irrelevant to your character, except a lot of people tend to care when it's one of either two extremes. It's just that there's more disagreement on what the upper extreme is in terms of a specific number.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 06:13 PM
2

But I'm not one of those men, so you're looking for hypocrisy in the wrong place...
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 03:37 PM
2

Be accurate about your level and the level you are pursuing. Young, fit, cute is the top 2% of women in North America and men from 18-65 are pursuing them. This is too subjective for actionable dating advice. "Levels" do exist in popular culture but dating success as a man is largely about your own confidence "levels" as well. And different people will have different opinions on what passes for "young, fit, and cute." Prepare for the worst, hope for the best. A little humility and self-awareness…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 01:59 AM
1

Think about it, you know absolutely nothing about this person other than their appearance. You don't know if she shares similar beliefs to you, you don't know if she's a good person, That's what the first date is for. Looks is usually the initial filter anyways, with a cold approach you're just changing up the order by which you're vetting her qualities. Someone who shares your values and is a good person, but who you're not physically attracted to, is a friend. Obviously since your first priori…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/23 07:08 PM
4

Being interesting and pushing the envelope a little bit is also important in social settings. Being interesting definitely helps (not so much the latter), but you can still achieve your objective of making friends and connections, or just appearing normal at a social function, without being or doing either of those things. So most people usually stop at "normal" and not "interesting" in terms of development because that's enough to get by. You don't have to stand out to be platonically successfu…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 09:58 PM
15

you have to learn to walk before you can run. Sure that makes sense, but it still doesn't solve the problem of "How do I run." So the advice can often come across as insincere because it can sound like you just want to quickly tell them about step 0 so they will shut up and stop bothering you about step 1, 2 and 3. A more specific example would be someone asking me "how do I play basketball?" and me casually dismissing them with "Go run two miles every morning. Ever thought of doing that?" Yes, …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 09:45 PM
1

Yeah the wording just happened to sound like a hypothetical that I could imagine him bringing up
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 09:32 PM
18

Romantic and platonic socializing isn't the same thing, but there is a lot of overlap. For people who really struggle, just learning to hold a conversation with someone new without coming across as "weird" can be a big difference. The bar for platonic interaction is a lot lower though. You just have to not be noticeably rude or weird. With romantic interaction you have to be interesting and transgressive on top of that. And by transgressive I mean you have to create sexual tension, which involve…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 09:26 PM
27

"Flirting with women is exactly the same as talking with a female work colleague with no additional skills beyond platonic interaction that I can think of" Then again, thinking that approaching women is somehow naturally easy for men and indistinguishable from basic socialization isn't too surprising if you're a woman who's always assumed the passive role in a romantic interaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 09:03 PM
2

If I’m born with the most psychotic brain ever in existence, can I choose to act in a normal, well adjusted way? No. I will always behave somewhat psychotically. Getting into Sam Harris-ey territory there with the "How free is free will?" angle, I see lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 08:49 PM
2

This is a great question
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 08:03 PM
1

OK I see what you mean
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 08:01 PM
2

Why wouldn't it? If you have different goals in your teens (get into a good college, pathway to good career) then naturally you'll prioritize other things like dating once you've achieved your earlier life goals.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 07:50 PM
2

Socialization is different from courting. This. Platonic interaction/collaboration with friends/coworkers and flirting are two separate skillsets. One is encouraged in school and work, the other is seen as disruptive and unwanted and therefore isn't encouraged or developed by default in those environments. You have to pursue it on your own time and at your own risk.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 07:43 PM

"This is different though" is how it starts. No one thinks they're being anti-women as long as they don't agree with the woman they're picking on
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 05:48 PM

Technically concentration camps are prison camps, it's just after WW2 that people started conflating them with death camps.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 05:44 PM

Germany banned the swastika and Holocaust denial, but their success in de-Nazifying the country has more to do with changing the culture and the education system to make being a Nazi a shameful thing. German students touch upon the Holocaust in like 10 different school subjects apart from history lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 05:38 PM

Maybe it was Gorilla Glued shut
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 09:03 PM

I hear they're trying to diversify their fanbase
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 09:03 PM

Baseball games are fairly slow compared to other sports, which makes for some interesting commentating
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 08:57 PM

Who's N Dracula? /s
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 08:26 PM

Reminds me of that buff guy trying to open a water bottle at a baseball game. I feel like it'd be faster if you just learned how to use a wrench first
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 08:19 PM

I see, assuming that's the case then it's kind of eerie how his social media is still publicly accessible then
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 08:04 PM

Googling the manifesto you copy pasted returns an internet forum post from about year ago, and the post itself (essentially the text of the manifesto) includes a collection of excerpts from various articles and studies. Are they saying they have definitive proof that this anonymous poster is the same guy?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 07:46 PM

Small hobby groups are only ideal in the best case scenario where she approaches you first or there's no awkward rejection/gossip. Otherwise if that's her favorite activity and she looks like she really enjoys it then I wouldn't risk it and possibly make her have to find a new one. Violates the "easy exit strategy" principle IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 07:38 PM

Source?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 07:32 PM
12

Lol if someone points out women doing something bad it doesn't make sense to prove that it's not bad by saying "but men do this other bad thing too!"
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/23 07:04 PM
2

k-pop look is still kinda niche. The artform itself? Yeah it will become more popular over time. The "look"/style specifically? It's niche because it's not easy to pull off. How many people do you think look like K-pop stars? You'd have to be at least decently facially attractive with great skin and the right build to make the look and the hairstyle work for you, even if you're Asian or Korean.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 10:36 PM
14

Obsessive fan behavior is typically only done by young people. Mash X to doubt A lot of women on celebrity gossip subs are older women, for example. You can be a housewife with enough "down time" to scroll on Reddit and obsess about celebrities or reality TV.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 10:28 PM
19

From a woman's perspective (where safety is usually the most important consideration) the only one of the two options that makes sense is the one where the woman approaches a guy first whenever she feels comfortable. Instead of reacting on the spot to an unexpected advance.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 10:19 PM
13

Statistically you're wrong, just looking at BTS (the most popular K-pop group) the 18-29 demographic accounts for more than 53% and under-18s only 30%. According to a survey of half a million respondents. So the average fan is likely a woman in her early twenties at minimum.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 10:16 PM
2

I don't think they're all actors, but they're a terrible sample of the average woman. Just because you've interviewed thousands of Miami club girls doesn't mean your sample is statistically meaningful for the general population of women who aren't club girl types.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 09:54 PM
24

The woman making the first move makes more sense because it's more likely for a man to intimidate a woman by approaching her than for a woman to intimidate a man by approaching him. And one of the biggest complaints women have is unwanted attention from guys she dislikes. This way she can control the interaction at her own pace and comfort level. And the guys don't have to read her mind to know whether to avoid her or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 09:30 PM

Complaining about women who give men shit doesn't mean you want to spend time with a woman who gives you shit. It means you're hoping to find the ones who don't do that. Although yes saying "women" without qualifying does make it sound that way though.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/23 09:54 PM

I can see that if you have a personality that's less reserved, but I'm not so sure that's the norm. At least in person that would seem like TMI to be oversharing all those details with someone you're not close with.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/23 09:45 PM

Which guys? What guys are going around trying to befriend women who disagree with them?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/23 09:27 PM
1

We learned to counter our pattern recognition, and fear of the unknown with critical thinking, ie. we are able to recognize what differences we have reason to be and not be afraid of, ergo something like racism becoming less of a factor Agreed, pattern recognition is a poor excuse for prejudice when you're dealing with individuals. It's mind-boggling to me how even a lot of left-leaning women will understand this concept when talking about racial minorities with the utmost sensitivity and compas…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/23 09:19 PM

But the women you'd be close enough to for them to tell you the ugly details about giving their BFs shit is not entirely a random sample to begin with, people tend to befriend other people who think like them and who agree with their political opinions
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/23 09:08 PM
0

You have no idea how often men fake hobbies to win a woman over Sure, and I'm saying you don't have to do that lol
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/23 06:42 AM
1

Nothing about improving yourself requires that you fake a hobby. It's more like if you already have common interests then you can work on other areas like your physique or your personality. Then again it's possible to develop new interests because of someone else. That's not really faking anything unless you're really forcing yourself to like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/23 06:27 AM
6

You believe the president of the D&D Club can steal the head cheerleader from the quarterback? The whole "jocks vs. nerds" thing feels a bit antiquated in 2023 and is not as black-and-white as it might have been in the 80s, let's say, where cliques were a lot more defined and when social media didn't exist to break down the barriers between subcultures. Nowadays interests that were considered loser-ish a few decades ago like video games or anime enjoy a pretty mainstream demographic of fans of b…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/23 06:17 AM
0

It's not about "weight classes" though, it's about types and niches. Weight class implies a hierarchy, niches are different but equal in value. Putting aside NACALT (not all cheerleaders are the same) and stereotypes about women's preferences, there's nothing wrong with shooting out of your league. One strategy would be to try harder to raise your own desirability. Then there's the defeatist attitude, which is to just give up and "stay in your 'lane'" because it's easier than putting in effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/23 05:52 AM
1

If a comedian calls you out while you're on a date then there's a good chance they'll squash your relationship if you're not witty enough on the spot
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/23 12:45 AM
6

If RP men believe that you can overcome all obstacles by working on yourself and that women are less rational than men, then that is undoubtedly going to result in a conservative outlook. But you yourself admit that something like personal responsibility "is not uniquely conservative," so the outcome of RP belief shouldn't inherently result in a certain political outlook by your view. Also sexist views aren't uniquely conservative either, at least on a personal level in private life (as opposed …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/23 08:20 PM
7

At minimum they should approach the subject with the same awareness that victims are often victims due to "socioeconomic and structural factors beyond their control that deserve understanding and sympathy." Instead of attributing the problem to character defect. Having said that, dating is a complex issue like racism that can't be "solved" overnight with legislation. But you can advocate for calling out bad actors and removing barriers to equal access to opportunity (like dating apps being succe…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/23 08:08 PM
11

Lol yeah it's really interesting to see political theory in action, especially when the consequences are obvious in a really short time frame
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/23 07:13 PM
76

TRP isn't a political movement though, and dating is the one area I've found where a lot of people have views that are inconsistent with their political beliefs. Like left-leaning women who support progressive politics but turn into "pull yourself up by the bootstraps" conservatives when talking about lonely men. And left-leaning men who support feminism in the abstract but also desire traditional arrangements and expectations in their romantic relationships. That said, frustration with dating i…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/23 06:49 PM
1

Proof? Haven't seen any news about drama between FNF and all these other creators
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/23 05:39 AM

Depends on her personality, but usually it's more trouble than it's worth When a woman says "but we can be friends" after rejection If you're gonna say that then you better mean it Don't get buyer's remorse and then complain afterwards about orbiters or guy friends having residual feelings for you
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/23 09:43 PM

Because it's not usually considered bigotry to criticize/insult an entire group that you're also a part of Still shitty either way but yeah
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/23 09:37 PM
1

Similarity tends to make relationships more stable, polarity makes them more interesting. So it depends on what you value
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/23 05:52 PM
1

What country do you live in where the life expectancy for men is at most 63
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/23 11:56 PM
3

I doubt that there would be as many complainers if older men were entering into egalitarian relationships with younger women. It's the total opposite. The majority of people who complain about age gaps are the ones who say that they're wrong because of the power dynamic aspect of a long-term relationship that isn't as present in a casual hookup where both people know what the deal is. Also the age formula deals with dating, not ONS.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/23 11:52 PM
3

"If that man approached me I would probably taze him!" "WHY AM I SO UGLY" Luckily for her the hint of self-awareness makes up for the bitchy attitude
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/23 08:25 PM

Nothing "proves" your point because you didn't even do the thing I suggested If you did you'd see the evidence you requested of women whining about him and other age gap relationships
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/23 12:42 AM

Just search dicaprio on any social media platform Also good on you to ask for an example without giving one of your own
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/23 11:02 PM

I've seen women bring it up constantly and not in response to a guy...in this subreddit, on Reddit in general, on Youtube, Twitter, Tik Tok, etc. Any forum to do with relationships/celebs/aging/dating over a certain age (which are primarily female users) will reliably see this topic pop up
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/23 10:44 PM

No, I see more men here not shutting the fuck up about it. Men aren't the ones who "started it first" on the whole age gap thing, they're mostly reacting defensively against the online relationship Karens. For the real culprit you'd have to blame the bored housewives who frequent celebrity gossip sites and, often by their own admission, make "petty" and unsolicited remarks about the relationships and lives of strangers
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/23 10:30 PM

Having social media is fine in a relationship as long as you don't post thirst traps
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/23 10:21 PM
3

Emphasis on young men though. Women generally do care about a guy's n-count past a certain age if it's zero, they'll see it as a red flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/23 06:13 PM
6

Depends on if you define it as "any woman with a pulse" or "woman you actually find attractive." People aren't all working with the same definitions in these discussions
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/23 05:48 PM
1

4) Does this person look like you or have a similar personality type? I don't think it's very helpful to take dating advice from the experience of someone who looks and comes across vastly different than you do
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/23 05:22 PM
6

I agree on taking opportunities as they come, and I wouldn't fault a guy for trying to take a shot as long as they were respectful. Just like I wouldn't fault a stranger of any gender for trying to make platonic small talk with me. Being hit on by gay men wouldn't bother me as long as they were respectful, because a compliment is a compliment and any opinion on how I come across to others is useful information. Also preselection and by extension social proof don't rely on the identity of the ind…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/23 05:19 PM
2

Great point, it's your friend's reputation too and not only yours on the line
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 10:38 PM
2

Yeah I agree, the "meeting new people" circle should be self-contained and more easily expendable
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 10:37 PM
4

That's interesting, your logic for not approaching in the workplace (you'll see them again if things go sour) is my logic for not warm approaching people introduced to you in your social circles (because you'll constantly see them again or hear about it if things go sour). I know that's a controversial opinion but I think "don't shit where you eat" logic extends past the workplace to close friend groups you wouldn't want to be forced to distance yourself from.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 09:14 PM
6

Yeah this is one of those things that depends on the person and how responsible they are. Kind of like how speed limits are designed for the worst driver on the road.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 09:04 PM

"You're not a minority? But you support civil rights, how is that possible!?"
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 04:30 PM

I don't have a problem with disagreement, just that too many people here make claims of "proof" based on faulty logic. There being more of something doesn't necessarily "prove" anything. Anyhow I feel like I'm misinterpreting your intended tone and word choice so yes it's probably better that we just agree to disagree
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 06:48 AM

In other words, LOL, you dissagree. Fine, LOL. It's not a "disagreement," your logic makes no sense LOL, plenty of men say that too. Lol. Right, and plenty of women also say it. Which contradicts your claim that stigma from society is the biggest thing stopping women from dating younger dudes I think it's stigma, you think it's preference. Lol What are you talking about, the stigma comes from person A directed at person B's preference. It's not like we're using different labels for the same thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 06:23 AM

The fact that it's more common for men to be with much younger women than women with much younger men proves that there's much more stigma in women being with younger men. Lol "proves" Or...that could just mean that on average women prefer slightly older men rather than much younger men. In fact you hear it quite often as a smug retort to "gross" men in age gaps, women saying things like "I could never imagine myself dating a 20 year old guy, he'd be like a CHILD compared to me!" (Putting aside …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 06:04 AM
1

I mean, I'm not sure that the definition of "preselection" demands that the people vouching for your desirability have to be attractive or morally righteous. So in theory yes, any attention is better than none, because it doesn't take a model or a saint to recognize that, say, Brad Pitt is a good looking man.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/23 02:31 AM
4

The advice given you listed aren’t mutually exclusive. You can not put women on a pedestal and also not show toxic masculinity as you put it. It’s called being normal. Well yeah, it's "simple" in theory. But obviously it's easier said than done in practice, especially as a woman who isn't expected to make the first move and can afford to make easy judgments about "unnecessary" behavior. It's hard to learn a skill and get better at it (including social skills) without making mistakes and learning…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 09:59 PM
6

I agree on your definitions. But I disagree that needing to be told this means men put women on a pedestal. More like it means that societal messaging around proper behavior when it comes to dating is very confusing because young men are told to "not put women on a pedestal" but also told to "not be toxically masculine" at the same time. When the actual solution is that you have to risk doing both in order to calibrate your approach and find that small sliver of middle ground that works for your…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 08:02 PM
5

I think you and OP (and red pill) might be interpreting it too literally. At least for the average guy that advice doesn't quite work if you're not attractive enough for women to forgive you for being rude. Yes, "negging" women outright is insulting and makes you look like an asshole. But the opposite of over-complimenting women is really lame and makes the guy look like an agreeable people-pleaser. Even playing it safe can be boring. The reasonable compromise is that you should joke around by i…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 07:20 PM
3

Not really, why would you care about your daughter being attractive
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/23 04:10 AM
1

Tbf they both have potential health consequences
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/23 02:45 AM
12

Reminds me of a certain post accusing certain red pill men of being "hypocrites" for prioritizing attractiveness in a wife vs. prioritizing educational level in a daughter
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/23 09:23 PM
3

"Brand reputation" is less of a problem here because people have considerably fewer options for meeting people than they do with product alternatives. For most women it's usually either 1) apps or 2) friend groups or 3) random guys in social settings or 4) random guys in public. Even if one group of women complains about the quality of men on online dating apps, for instance, another woman who is newer to dating or has different viewpoints isn't necessarily going to eliminate OLD from her to-try…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/23 10:09 PM
3

Do you not interact with at least 3 people a day? How long do you think an approach takes lol Now if you had said "I don't have the energy or the mindset to stress about approaching 3 women after a long day" then that'd be more believable.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/23 09:54 PM
0

and the standards that make a good wife are universal Not at all, different people have different standards for a partner If these RP values were of any value, men will be teaching them to their daughter Depends on the value, a lot of RP values are more gender specific than not, and therefore not very applicable to women. In those cases it'd be a bit like teaching your son how to deal with his period.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 10:15 PM
0

Either way you wouldn't treat them exactly the same, so not every difference is a double standard. Just like many women are attracted to a guy who can stand up for himself and not blindly agree with everything she says, but would prefer an obedient son once they become mothers.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 10:11 PM
-1

Obviously there's some overlap in the Venn diagram between "daughter" and "wife" where you can find something like "respect," but I'm saying that they're not two identical circles and it'd be fucking weird if they were
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 09:52 PM
3

It’s almost as if you can’t view women as a monolith. Lmao that's the whole point though...women aren't a monolith so you can't treat your wife exactly the same way you'd treat your daughter. You have different roles in relation to each, you can't possibly view them the same way. It's only hypocrisy in any meaningful sense if you somehow believe it's hypocrisy for a man to prefer a hot wife but then not care whether his daughter is hot. Yeah I'll take the "hypocrite" any day lol
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 09:31 PM
9

The "terminally online-ness" goes more the other direction with age gaps, where the people who seem to have a problem with them and blindly criticize them are often the loudest voices online. Especially Gen Z it seems. But other than those two topics I'd say n-count is another big one.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 07:15 PM
1

True but this isn't as meaningful as you might think it is, nor is it unique to Red Pillers. Most parents are "hypocrites" when it comes to seeing their spouse in a sexual way and valuing them for attraction-based traits vs. seeing their child in a holistic and platonic way and valuing them for self-sufficiency traits. You'd hope so at least. In fact it'd be kind of disturbing if there were no discrepancy at all between a parent role and a lover role. If there's any "gotcha" it's that parents ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 06:55 PM
1

Are you saying that never in the history of shaming has someone changed their mind about doing the thing they're being shamed for? I know PPD is a bubble but c'mon lol
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 08:11 PM
1

You're not wrong, people are more likely to listen if you don't offend them first
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 06:36 PM
1

All I'm saying is that shaming individuals can be effective in changing individual behavior, this is indisputable. Some people lose weight to silence their haters, this is an actual thing that happens. Populations are made up of individuals who may respond differently to external pressure. Some of them become more depressed, others use external pressure as motivation to change their habits.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 06:34 PM
1

I mean it does both those things. I think it's pretty safe to say that we live in a world where shaming and peer pressure exist and can be quite effective in making people change their behavior. Whether that's a good thing is another discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 06:18 PM
3

How is telling a short guy that most women like tall men dating advice though? It's not like they can do anything useful with that information. I mean sure, you're being more realistic than idealistic but you're still speaking for other women and offering no practical solution that can pass for advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 06:16 PM
7

If they were consistent then people who genuinely find the fish/fisherman analogy disgusting would also be offended at expressions like "there's plenty of fish in the sea" (gender neutral) and "big fish in a small pond" or "fish out of water" (topic neutral)
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 05:09 PM
3

Shaming helps to correct behavior that society deems problematic, if that's your goal
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 05:04 PM
7

Well at least you're self-aware. Of course we should try to be accepting but you do raise a fair point about potentially making things worse by trying to immediately force something that isn't natural to you
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 02:51 AM
19

"No, the stigma IS proof that these types of relationships are inherently wrong and should not be normalized!" ​ /s
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 01:33 AM
3

The bar for casual should be equally high in theory, because on the off chance that you get pregnant and decide not to go through with the abortion then you want a guy who can be a father to your kid and someone you can bear to spend time raising a child together with.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 04:07 AM
6

Only around 8% have an age difference over 10 years. Oops, I was off by 3% Lmao that's...not how the math works. 95% of the subset of men who actually pursue age gaps and 8% of ALL men in heterosexual couples are two different populations which means indeed that over 95% of 18 year olds are not coupling up with 50 year olds. See above. Do you think "30+" refers to 50 year olds at minimum? Also not being married to someone doesn't mean you don't find them attractive, the last part of which was th…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 07:47 PM
5

I never disputed "most." I wouldn't be surprised if most 18-year old women preferred 18-year old men (but certainly not to the exclusion of other ages besides 18). Even though anecdata making something "self-evident" isn't really a thing. But there's a difference between 51% and 95%, and the latter seems like a number that people just randomly throw out with, well, 95% confidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 06:52 PM
14

95% Citation needed Even if that figure were true, the average person here wouldn't call a short guy "delusional" for wanting to date tall women (despite the vast majority of women not having a preference for much shorter guys). Instead they'd probably agree that women aren't all the same and encourage him to break out of his self-denigrating, blackpill stance. But for some reason when it comes to age as the variable, even the women who take the opposing stance on age gaps here are content with …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 06:29 PM
26

I guarantee you that if you lined up 100 random men ages 20 - 30 and guessed their ages, you’d be wrong a majority of the time. Exactly, it doesn't take a PhD to realize that a study on age-disparate physical attraction that isn't actually age-blind is a poorly designed study.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 06:21 PM
19

Dudes aren't trying to hook up with most younger women, just maybe a handful of them. Some probably are, but generally yeah for most guys it's not about age for age's sake, it's about looks. Just like many women prefer tall, strong guys despite the "potential power imbalance." There's nothing wrong with admitting that most people care about looking youthful, women included. Even so, it's not so much that older women aren't as attractive, it's that the attractive ones are statistically already ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 06:17 PM
10

I'm not sure this post is asking for a solution to that problem really, seems more like they're just trying to get people to admit reality and not give generically prohibitive dating advice like they're speaking for all women
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 05:51 PM
8

I disagree, there's actual creepy behavior that's wrong NO MATTER WHO does them, but that doesn't negate the point that some guys are called creepy simply based on their identity or their looks despite following all the rules. Your own list is self-contradictory in a way, because: "Social cues" and "proper social behavior" are just vaguely defined loopholes meant to frame subjective judgments of how a person looks (and how they should "stay in their lane") as objectively creepy "behavior" that i…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 05:35 PM
17

You're kind of reinforcing their point. You'd have to go out of your way to stare intensely to be creepy as an attractive dude, whereas an unattractive guy can do everything by the book and risk the same label. It's just the amount of tolerance and patience changes depending on how appealing they look, generally speaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 05:32 PM
1

It isn’t going to capture the attention of strangers, is what I’m saying. A woman who is obviously uncomfortable is going to stand out. And that discomfort is not correlated with age, is my point. There's no minimum age for being a creep. Nah men here just love to punch down. Sure there are some men like that, but when I'm debating people here on this issue I don't verify their gender before challenging their opinions I disagree with. Why would a guy be afraid of another man on the internet who'…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 07:41 PM
1

If a woman of legal age desires the attention, it isn’t concerning. I mean, yeah. Which is why all the moral posturing on consenting age gaps makes no sense. Go on a men’s or parenting sub and defend chasing women half your age, you aren’t required to take women’s opinion on the matter. I don't care who's making the arguments, only if they're logically sound or not. A lot of parents (and especially fathers of daughters) are hypocrites when it comes to being overprotective of even adult children …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 07:09 PM
1

They are physically weaker Except that logic would also apply to a guy dating same-age and older women in equal proportion. If we're going to be paranoid about physical power imbalance then nearly every heterosexual relationship should be a creepy red flag regardless of the ages, simply because of the potential of abuse due to men generally being bigger and stronger. Power, size, and gender differential coupled with social mores which cause women to kowtow and acquiesce is the reason 18 year old…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 06:39 PM
1

When someone says "younger women don't date much older men" or "young women find old guys repulsive" without qualifying the first part then they're implicitly making a claim about ALL younger women. By analogy, if I said "women are dumb" then most people would recognize my statement as a baseless generalization. And they'd agree that I would look insincere trying to get off on a technicality that doesn't even work semantically or grammatically ("ackshually...I never said ALL women are dumb").
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 06:15 PM
1

No worries. I was just saying how many women here will presume to speak for other women they don't know when it's a viewpoint they personally subscribe to, like how they will claim that women their age hate age gaps
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 05:50 AM
1

Makes sense
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 05:20 AM
29

Wow a sane opinion based on reality So many people here, even women, seem totally fine with AWALT and describing all women as some kind of monolith the moment it comes to women's supposedly universal disgust towards age gaps. And comically oversimplifying the discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 05:03 AM
3

I don't think I've ever seen anyone argue that most women exclude them A lot of people here make sweeping statements like "younger women don't even look at guys over 30, they're invisible" and other such unverifiable claims. When someone says "women don't like short men" do you interpret that to mean no women would ever date a short man? I honestly can't tell on PPD, you hear folks whine about AWALT/AMALT-type mentality but then turn around and generalize about things they agree with without hes…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 04:55 AM
5

Older women don’t mind dating slightly older men. The dating pool doesn’t shrink. And what if these slightly older men are open to dating much younger women? That's always a possibility and she'll likely have to drop him from her pool because she doesn't date "creeps." Either that or... If a man is attracted to and pursues young women, an older woman cannot compete with young women. She’s not even in the race and knows it. ...there's still a chance she can compete, and she might try. Hence the r…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 04:46 AM
2

Absolutely, because we’ve all experienced it since our early teens. Yeah, I believe you when you say you've dealt with it before. But that's your experience, not every woman your age thinks the same way or takes offense at old or ugly young guys feeling "entitled" to approach them. How can it shrink? It shrinks over time because older men are open to dating younger women, and because now you have to weed those guys out of your dating pool (if you think they're creeps). Naturally it would make se…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 04:28 AM
11

But for old guys trying to pick up young girls? It’s just empathy. When you're not personally involved? Most people aren't that much of a Good Samaritan to police the dating lives of total strangers out of pure altruism lol It's definitely also envy in the sense that some older women might not be getting the attention they once did when they were younger. Especially around the average marriage age where you start feeling time pressure if you're still single. Sure you might not want to date "that…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 04:12 AM
13

For some it's empathy, for others it's envy. Even in the best case scenario of genuine empathy from direct personal experience, the protective instinct can be misguided and certainly doesn't justify the stereotypes. Also the fact that women often include unflattering physical descriptions of said older men makes it transparent that the disgust is as much about looks as it is about age. It's not too different from the repulsion and personal offense some women take when they're approached by ugly …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 03:59 AM
1

Consistent with previous findings, women preferred partners of their own age, Right, prefer doesn't mean "excludes men outside their age" You can find women who will like older guys, they exist, just like you can find women who like short guys. That was my point. So saying "young women don't like older men" is categorically wrong. Claiming that it's a fantasy is itself a fantasy. I'll try to find a blind image study for next time this comes up but the mental gymnastics is so insane Bruh I litera…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 03:50 AM
2

Yeah it would make sense even without looking at data that the majority of women probably MOST prefer (but not exclusively prefer) guys in their age range. But how much of a majority that comprises is mostly people making wild guesses. Unfortunately the first study has a sample size of less than 100, which is not nothing but isn't great either. And it's face-to-face so I'd expect some people to "sanitize" their responses out of embarrassment of being put on the spot with the fantasy question. Bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 02:34 AM
1

If there are studies and actual data that support either of those two statements then I haven't seen anyone present them in the 34897597 age gap posts that have popped up in this sub. And as your flair would suggest, I'd imagine one would have a very hard time trying to prove their moral assumptions on age gaps based on "they're bad because me and literally all of my female friends..." And all this is beyond actually coming to an agreement first on a definition of "young" and "older" and "normal…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 01:13 AM
19

I mean there's literally no way around that one lol Even with a stove you can tell it's hot by looking at it or being close to it. How do you know whether someone wants to talk to you without actually talking to them? Unless you're acting really out of place, most people aren't going to signal their disgust towards you in comically obvious ways. So either you approach politely and take that risk, or you don't and regret it. There's potential downsides either way.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/23 07:46 PM
1

That wasn't your hypothesis though. You're saying rizz is the most important singular trait out of the 5 you named. You probably came to that conclusion because you're already tall and in shape (without mentioning your face) but aren't doing as well in dating as "just be tall" stereotypes would lead you to believe. But in order for you to actually personally test your hypothesis and each variable independently, you'd have to live in an alternate dimension where you had exceptional charisma but w…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/23 10:15 PM
4

Height and body are much easier to stand out with because they're more objectively measurable and visually obvious. Being charismatic is more subjective because one woman's "confident" is easily another woman's "cringe," so it's harder to set yourself apart. Plus you'd have to get close enough and stick around long enough for you to demonstrate your charisma. Whereas looks are an immediate hook. Even if you're very charismatic your looks can still be a bottleneck. (And I'm not entirely convinced…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/23 09:43 PM

Yeah but it is kind of interesting that you think 0/1 is an unrealistic number for a woman lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/23 09:05 PM
2

It's not "whataboutism" to point out a double standard, which you can't do without explicitly mentioning the other thing you're comparing to. The point being that assumptions based on stereotypes aren't justified simply because they're more common in one population than another. Otherwise racial stereotypes would be perfectly acceptable because of the "commonality" (perceived or otherwise) of their occurrence among one race in particular relative to every other race.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/23 05:39 PM
1

Hey that's a good list but I think you forgot a few points so I figured I'd add them here for you! - Because older women KNOW men their age can see right through their bullshit so they want a young impressionable BOY (who's young enough to be their son) that they can mold - Because they're literally predators who would go way lower if they could...in fact they'd try even harder to pursue 24 year old children with undeveloped brains if it were more socially acceptable - Because they're intimidate…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/23 12:46 AM
6

The results of that study are quite sobering, but the trend of upward growth does seem unsustainable to me in the long term even just looking at the imbalanced gender ratio: online dating apps just don't work numerically for the average dude. Also there's too much disparity in outcomes because like most algorithms it favors a small minority of the most desirable accounts with a disproportionate amount of matches. If there's an explanation that resolves the numbers I'd be happy to hear it.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/23 05:30 AM
4

Never approach anyone in public transit, they’re more likely to be on guard It depends on the individual, so while this may generally be true YMMV and you should be wary of any advice that claims to apply universally. Airports and planes are a notable exception IME, a lot of people seem way more amenable to chatting up strangers when they're on a flight as opposed to a bus or train. Maybe it's the excitement of travel and meeting new people. Also you can usually tell when someone prefers not to,…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/23 05:10 AM
6

Cold approach also includes things that most people would find acceptable, like a random girl at a random party
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/23 05:03 AM
4

Yeah, I think a big part of the problem is that people online are very quick to associate neutral words with their worst possible interpretation. Like some women will see the word "approach" and think of a dude who follows you into a dark alley and physically blocks your path with an evil grin on his face.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/23 05:15 AM
7

That's a pretty bad faith characterization and, ironically, rather selfish coming from the gender that's not societally expected to take the risk of making the first move...but still benefits from men having to initiate while enjoying the luxury of calling them creepy. Wouldn't you say? There's nothing remotely selfish about politely approaching a woman, any more than it would be "selfish" to initiate platonic small talk with a stranger for the purpose of making friends. I can understand if the …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/23 03:51 AM
6

For all my criticisms of red pill, the one thing that they actually honestly address (and that blue pill is afraid to do) is to treat dating the same as any other area in life. Namely the message they preach is that you have to take risks (like the risk of making yourself and others uncomfortable) in order to get any success in dating. And that not everyone will like you or view you positively in life but you can't let that keep you in your comfort zone. Ordinary dating advice shies away from th…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/23 02:10 AM
1

I mean two of those three involve real women who are actually misusing the app and not for its intended purpose
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 05:18 PM
4

Pretty important I'd say. You don't want to be having dumb arguments all the time about political shit, plus it'd be confusing for your kid to be brainwashed from two extremes on every single issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 05:12 PM
12

I thought the point of that meme was to show how futile it is for normies by basically repeating the exact same rule in two different ways to give you that false glimmer of hope Also "be attractive" comes first so you wouldn't even get to step 2 anyways even if they were different lol
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 05:01 PM
1

That's a weirdly defensive stance to take. The opposite of "incompetent adult" is not "bangmaid."
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 04:52 PM
1

I was thinking more like raising a child, or managing finances. Basic as in essential, not stupidly simple.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 06:23 AM
2

I mean your point hinges entirely on the numerical value being picked for intelligence, and you're over-exaggerating. A 5 would be dead average but it's certainly not the caricature of an imbecile that you seem to think that the guys here (even the red pillers) are willing to put up with for a pretty face. Most people (men and women) are happy with a hot partner of reasonable intelligence, who's smart enough to figure out basic life tasks with a bit of effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 05:14 AM
1

Lol there's no way that's the reasonable conclusion to draw from this. 6/10 is fairly average intelligence, as in the average person who is neither a genius nor developmentally disabled. You don't need to be book smart or have a degree in theoretical physics to realize that common sense and emotional intelligence are more important for a healthy and functional relationship than having an advanced degree. And let's not act like looks don't matter, unless it's only superficial for men to care abou…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 05:03 AM
1

Yeah TV characters aside, I can see how watching comedy shows (or even better, comedy podcasts) could help, since being funny is an important social skill. But even that only teaches you the how, and not the what. Still need to come up with content on your own. Reading books and just generally learning about stuff helps with expanding your conversational vocabulary, as does taking risks and doing interesting things so you actually have stories people want to hear. Still it's not always easy to q…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 12:52 AM
1

Interesting list, but I'm not sure how one can actually "learn" wit by watching TV shows. Unless you're memorizing Hollywood-esque pickup lines and speech patterns, being able to think of witty things to say on the spot requires intelligence and exceptional recall and can't be copied through imitation. Granted, you can learn more technical skills like comedic timing and storytelling from watching comedy shows, but even that material is written and prepared in advance and not really off-the-cuff.…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 12:26 AM
2

It also applies if she's only an acquaintance and you have friends in common. Which is why I'm not a big fan of social circles dating to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 09:24 PM
6

Sure that's simple in theory, but in reality there are social consequences to unsuccessfully asking out women in your circles. It's not like people forget and your reputation "resets" the day after a rejection or a bad breakup, you can really only try once or maybe twice per friend group without jeopardizing the dynamic of the group. "Move on" only works well if you're lucky and she's a nice person who doesn't gossip, or you don't really care about staying in the group (nor does she), or if it's…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 08:28 PM
2

Most people of the same age don't always date and pick their marriage partners for "pure practicality" either, so that's a moot point that has no purpose being dragged specifically into an age gap discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 08:23 PM
2

Lol bro, it’s safer to vote than have sex. Only if you're solely thinking about the one person themselves lol Your vote can potentially negatively impact millions of people other than yourself, and in worse ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 06:23 PM
6

but if you like a girl then make it clear you want a relationship at first Doesn't always work out that way lol Being too forward with romantic intentions can come off as pushy and turn off a lot of women from even the possibility of friendship. It's the reason why these women also hate being cold approached. There's a certain window of time where it's not too early or too late to indicate that you're interested, but it's tricky because it depends on the individuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 06:08 PM
2

If an 18 year old is barely an adult and not mature enough to handle an adult relationship then how are they old enough to handle voting responsibly? There's gotta be consistency across the board on what being a "real adult" means, is what I'm trying to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 06:05 PM
1

Sure, but young voters and voters are also every different things to some conservatives who want to raise the voting age. If you catch my drift.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 05:45 PM
2

Or the respondents could be lying or undercounting their numbers because these kinds of surveys on sensitive subjects can often be unreliable for obvious reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 05:29 PM
8

a "hoe" is defined by their actions Not suggesting casual sex is bad, but actions can be due to a mindset that a person may or may not still have. Just like cheating. Cheaters are also defined by their actions, and many people believe "once a cheater, always a cheater." Also "you knew they were a cheater when you met them so you can't say it wasn't expected."
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 05:25 PM
3

I mean, no one would care about a 30 year old woman dating a 50 year old man. If that were the case then all the talk about "different life stages" and "life experience power dynamics" and "half your age plus seven" is BS, if people are just gonna stop caring after 30. It just makes it more transparent that it's largely men in their 20s and women in their 30s with self-serving reasons for gatekeeping relationships involving attractive women in their 20s.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 05:11 PM
2

They're obviously related, because two people can have their hoe phases at different times in their lives. It's not some set thing where everyone begins and ends their hoe phase at the same age. That kind of thinking is what gives ammunition to the people who believe the Wall hits women at a set age of 30, for instance. Everyone's timeline is different.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 05:06 PM
1

That's not on you though, you can't always predict the future.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/23 12:45 AM
3

Why not?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/23 10:38 PM
2

Okay, so then how are they "different standards" of gross if neither one of them is inherently immoral? Unless you mean different levels of perceived risk, but that doesn't make much sense to me because a woman who doesn't prefer a guy that sleeps around would already be very aware of the high risks involved with people who sleep around. ​ Someone who wants to date a lot younger is seeking to do something that could fuck up several people and isn't someone I'd want to bring myself to interact wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 09:01 PM
3

https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/120gwdp/being_attracted_to_18_year_olds_is_comparable_to/ As someone who isn't into men or women who does either of these things, I can say they're quite different standards of gross. Someone who has slept around isn't someone who I'd date, but they can't really hurt anyone other than themselves and I can respect their choice. There isn't anything particularly immoral about it unless you think having sex in itself is just wrong. [...] Someone wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 08:02 PM
4

You've explicitly expressed your opinion in the past that men who date younger women are seeking to do something you deem essentially immoral. As a reason for you not wanting to interact with said men. Young women are doing a fine job of protecting ourselves from these risks. Looks like you've ironically answered the question of whether you actually believe young women are mature enough for age gaps then.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 07:30 PM
6

Don't assign a position to me I never argued for. Don't lie about not taking a position you've clearly taken before based on what you've said in the past on this topic. Seriously, at least have the decency to be honest about your beliefs if you feel so strongly about protecting young women, instead of trying to steal valor and appear "open-minded" about age gaps being morally neutral.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 07:10 PM
7

The same reasons can be used to explain why this is silly and they'll probably be unsuccessful. This is a common pattern I've noticed when age gap opponents run out of steam in these discussions. They move the goalposts to the "practicality of age gaps" argument instead of sticking with the "morality of age gaps" argument because they know they can't prove that these relationships are toxic or immoral by default. Every argument about age gaps being inherently toxic is dependent on cultural stere…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 06:41 PM
3

Yeah the desire for upward mobility is usually a stepwise process. Although most people don't get to jump to millions or billions in one step.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 09:23 PM
7

There's a lot of ground between 140k and 1MM. Even 250-300K would be a selling point for a woman making 70k in New York versus other dudes making 70k. Your competitiveness is relative to the location but also to the other men that she actually has the opportunity to meet on a day-to-day basis.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 09:05 PM
4

The point is that that's only the first step though, it doesn't actually fully answer the question of the advice asker. If someone asked "how do I build a house" it's not enough to just say "Buy a plot of land first."
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 08:51 PM
25

What good is that advice then for a guy who's trying to date? It's not relevant to the problem. Simply having a hobby or volunteering isn't enough to date successfully, and we know that because if a guy told you "I have a hobby/volunteer but I still don't get women" you'd tell him the exact opposite of the generic advice: "obviously that's not enough." It signals you're not entirely sincere by putting only enough effort in your answer to reveal the brain-dead obvious first step (out of many step…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 08:46 PM
2

Your own post disproves your assumption. Guys date younger women because typically they look more attractive to those guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 06:14 PM
7

I literally know more 20/21 year olds who are mature than 31 year olds, age has 0 correspondence with maturity. In fact, beyond maturity, age isn't even directly correlated with amount of life experience. But most people aren't willing to think critically and calmly enough on this subject to understand why that is.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 10:23 PM
1

All things being equal (which they probably aren't due to spillover effects of being attractive), it would make more sense that ugly women have it harder than vice versa. Imagine a rich person claiming they have it harder than poor people because "managing your investments is a real headache, and I have to worry about people scratching my Benz in the parking lot." Sure but the term "first-world problem" was invented for this sort of thing. Having a lack (of options, resources, opportunities) is …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 10:15 PM
7

Well according to age gap mathematicians 25 and 18/19 would be creepy because of the half your age + 7 formula. Also the 25 year old would already have a developed brain, but not their partner. So a lot of people on Reddit would disagree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 10:05 PM
16

I would split the 25-35 demographic into two parts: 25-27 and 28+. By 28-ish most women are likely already paired with guys that they met either in college or early twenties. I agree with the general premise though, assuming you don't want a partner who already has kids. Typically the last group of friends that people are really close with are friends they made in college, whereas once you start working it's difficult to meet and befriend a high enough volume of people to cultivate a circle you …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 10:00 PM
13

Also if women who liked older guys were such an extreme exception then where are all those "horror stories" of women with toxic older bfs coming from? Either those stories are mostly fabricated in order to drive the "age gaps bad" narrative, or the fact that they happen "all the time" means the superset of all age gap relationships (good and bad) must also be a common enough occurrence for these women to have such a deep well of anecdotes to draw from. Can't have it both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 09:45 PM
3

Her friend group is a random sample of 10,000 people
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 09:39 PM

You will always eventually lose your attraction you had for your partner because she will always outgrow what you're attracted to. So no point in marrying someone if you know you wont be attracted to them in the future. Its a lose lose situation for you and your wife. This argument is not very defensible at all. This is like saying women who prefer guys with hair are not suitable for marriage because they will likely lose attraction when their husbands start balding in 10 years or so. Or that an…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/23 06:18 PM
5

The real question is, are those men asking shy, retiring men how to find shy, retiring women? There's no rule that says you're obligated to date someone who is exactly like you. People's preferences and attraction don't always align that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 05:30 PM
1

That's very gracious of you but no one would blame you if you took the opportunity to remind them that negative generalizations are pretty shitty. And the idea of someone telling a racist joke and then saying "Dude don't take it so personally!" to someone of the targeted race seems so conveniently selfish it's almost laughable.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 04:14 AM
1

Yes, and learn not to take generalizations personally. I agree, but again that's not advice that's appropriate for the person making the generalization to give. I definitely don't think that kind of statement would fly in response to a "not all Muslims" or "not all minorities" lol This might be controversial on Reddit but I don't think it matters what the X in "not all X" is. It's still a pretty valid point against remarks that are racist, homophobic, misogynist, misandrist, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 03:59 AM
1

That's helpful advice, but it's only half of the equation. The people on the other side actually making the bigoted remarks have a greater responsibility to stop generalizing as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 03:32 AM
1

Same way women want equality, but require their partner to be better than them. If these women are so aware of intimate partner violence being a thing, then theoretically they should want to date men who are considerably weaker and shorter than themselves in order to maximize their fighting chances. But that would involve admitting that "safety" isn't necessarily a woman's number one priority in finding a suitable (attractive) partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 03:00 AM
2

The irony of 23 year olds dating 26 year olds talking about prefrontal cortex development at 25 like it's a border wall "The only moral age gap is my age gap"
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 11:48 PM
3

Lol when it comes to "selective concern" over the topic of age gaps, the people attacking them are the ones whose nearly every argument is a double standard with regard to very strategic pearl clutching over power dynamics, age of adulthood, and just generally acting like progressive conservative prudes but only for this one type of relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 11:45 PM
5

maybe we can argue that the term “rape culture” in itself isn’t representative of the issue Yeah that's 150% the problem with these terms: they're grossly inaccurate to the extent that they create more division in the people who are supposed to unite and solve the problem, than actually solving the problem. The political left is great at galvanizing and bringing attention to social issues that marginalized people face, but absolutely terrible at talking about them responsibly and logically.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 01:15 AM
2

The problem with using super ambiguous language like "defund the police" and "rape culture" is that those terms have been redefined so broadly that any criticism of the terminology can be spun as an attack against actual victims of the literal definition of the associated terms (and who might only comprise a small percentage of the redefined category itself).
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 01:10 AM
7

Yes I read both halves of your comment and responded to every line
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 08:50 PM
2

This is not my opinion but a lot of people still associate him with "half-white" or "white-adjacent" rather than the average Asian. It's kind of like how saying you think Zendaya is an attractive black woman gets eye rolls from darker skinned black women because of the colorism they face in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 08:19 PM
1

I'm surprised bar/club dating is increasing, seeing how the "approach women you don't know" method has been kind of vilified by younger people and Gen Z in particular. Although that could just be social media amplifying certain voices. Also how much of the "bar/club" percentage is actually comprised of couples who talked on an online dating app first before meeting at a bar in real life?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 08:14 PM
5

That's an...interesting analysis lol I would have attributed it to the Kpop wave instead, I'm not so sure that the Asian dudes in that film were portrayed in an attractive or non-stereotypical way. But yes the publicity of that film certainly did help Asian people in general with staying in the public consciousness.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 08:10 PM
9

No one complains about that tbh. Yes I've never heard anyone accuse Dicaprio of being a "creep" for dating younger women. Literally "no one" has ever made a joke even remotely related to the number 25, no sir. Youth is more attractive in everyone because it correlates with health. Its only an issue when ancient old guys with moldy sperm try and target women with much less life experience for purely selfish reasons. So people (including women) like youth and looking young for perfectly acceptable…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 07:45 PM
1

Hedonism is only bad if you pursue pleasure at the expense of other things. By itself it's not really morally right or wrong, maybe just meaningless.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 05:02 PM
1

Sure, what's your point?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 04:18 PM
0

"Oppression is when no sitting in the front of the bus" It's really easy to make inequality seem trivial when you lack empathy and frame the issue in the least charitable way possible
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 04:12 PM
1

All im saying is some people don't want to be bothered on their daily errands and you should respect that. In theory that makes sense but it's impossible advice to follow in real life, because how would you even know who those people are just by looking at them? You'd have to at least approach them for them to say "no thanks" in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 05:15 AM
1

Well as long as you live in a society people don't need your "consent" for them to make the attempt at small talk with you. Even people with anxiety have to come to grips with that realization.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 05:02 AM
2

Not everyone with anxiety is the same You're right that was a generalization on my part, but to be fair I was responding to your original contention (and generalization) that parties > grocery stores for approaching women. By pointing out that for many if not most women with social anxiety, the grocery store scenario would actually be the better option of the two and less uncomfortable because there are no strings attached and because she can more easily and quickly exit the situation without so…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 04:35 AM
3

Lol if you have social anxiety then it's likely you're going to have a mini-freak out every time your "chaperone" friend leaves your line of sight to go to the restroom or abandons you with a group of acquaintances whose conversation you were content with observing but are now forced to participate in. I just don't see the logic that would explain how spending more time in a social situation would be preferable for someone with anxiety over running a quick errand where there are no expectations …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 04:17 AM
1

And a lot of people with social anxiety dread even more the idea of prolonged awkwardness or anxiety, especially an unscripted social situation like a party. Getting hit on at a grocery store would feel like purgatory but at least there it's acceptable to say "sorry I gotta go," as opposed to the 9th circle of hell that is trying to socialize as a neurodivergent at a party.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 04:03 AM
4

I feel like the grocery store is a pretty low-risk environment for approaching, you can just easily leave when you're done paying for your groceries and the interaction is over. Whereas if a guy hits on you at a party you're kinda stuck there listening to his awful stories or awkwardly trying to avoid him the entire night or until whenever your friend who you carpooled/walked with decides she's finally ready to go home lol
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 03:47 AM
1

There's a lot of documented evidence for this if you look at how the criminal justice system treats women with more mercy and gives them lighter sentences than men for the same crimes. According to this study for instance, men on average receive 63% longer sentences than women do, while women are twice as likely to avoid incarceration if convicted.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/23 01:21 AM
1

Obviously yeah it's the same as any social need really, like making friends. It involves consent from a willing party besides yourself. But the solution to someone seeking advice is not to tell them that bad people don't deserve those things. That might sound morally comforting but doesn't really solve the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/23 01:07 AM
1

That was just a parenthetical I included on the general topic of "needs" in relation to dating. I suspect part of the reason for OP's question was to point out the dismissive arguments commonly used by people who feel the need to stress that a lack of intimacy won't actually kill you so frustrated guys are simply just "whining about nothing." Not addressing your views specifically, I just added on that part because it's topical to how many women on PPD usually respond to this subject.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/23 12:58 AM
-1

Agreed. It's not first level but it's still like third level. The other levels include things that will still make your life miserable without. Think of it this way: if complaining about any non-lethal problem is just people being "whiny" then there's no point in discussing dating issues to begin with. Which would mean that every advice sub on Reddit that doesn't deal with posts like "I just got diagnosed with cancer" is a useless sub lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/23 12:40 AM
0

Sure. But in principle you're supposed to describe and discuss a hierarchy of needs based on the average person and not the extreme.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/23 12:24 AM
1

Even if it wasn't on the bottom of the pyramid it's still important for quality of life, in the same way that not having friends "won't literally kill you" but most people would agree having friends is indispensable for thriving if not surviving.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/23 12:01 AM
5

There's absolutely awkwardness and even offense taken among adults too, that's why "don't date your coworkers" and HR are a thing in the workplace. Two adults don't always communicate these things explicitly or interpret a situation the same way. Regardless, telling guys to "be smart and it will work out" sounds like advice from someone who's never actually taken the risk.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 11:47 PM
6

I'll assume you probably mean well but that's incredibly vague advice lol People often act stupid and awkward involuntarily around people they like and want to approach, it's not very...technical or actionable advice in terms of what steps you should take and what to avoid. Plus it's easier said than done to just say "be natural" if you're not the one who's societally expected to go on stage to be judged, so to speak.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 11:27 PM
4

"What's your name" and "Hi you're cute" are both great pickup lines Depends on the environment. Even at a bar it can be kind of unnatural or risky if you start with those as openers without following up with entertaining conversation, instead of something more platonic (like an observation about your immediate environment that gives you an out to just make small talk if you detect she's uninterested). If you're not attractive then it takes some charisma and social prowess to pull it off. Otherwi…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 11:21 PM
1

You’re THAT GUY if you hit on a hot girl who isn’t interested. Just… don’t do that. This isn't very actionable advice because it's so subjective lol How would you even know for sure if she's out of your league or whether she thinks she's out of your league? Always err on the side of grounding your self-esteem in "reality" and assuming she's not into you? If always playing it safe is the mindset then might as well not even hit on women in your social circles as per the original post.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 11:02 PM
3

There still might be if the rejection is awkward for her and makes her consider leaving the group. Even if there's no social penalty for you there could be for her, if she enjoys spending time in that group.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 10:56 PM
14

Well you're speaking from the POV of a woman, so "worked out just fine" isn't a very reassuring or accurate assessment of the risks involved IMO. It's likely the guy put his job or reputation on the line by making the first move on you. Even on the off chance you were actually the one to make the first move and ask out your coworkers/acquaintances you're likely not risking your reputation as much (or risking a chat with HR). Since most guys aren't creeped out by a woman approaching them romantic…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 10:47 PM
1

Lol I'm not sure if we just happen to agree word-for-word on certain topics or you're actually doing me the service of posting my viewpoints (that I've been too lazy to post) for me, but yes I agree 1000% and have often expressed this exact sentiment before pretty much verbatim. It's a "don't shit where you eat"-lite scenario of jeopardizing the dynamic of your friend circle that doesn't give the woman an exit strategy, and risks you developing a reputation for being "that guy." And the level of…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 05:29 PM
1

TwoX is a very dogmatic sub and I think default subs that benefit from front page attention should allow front page participation without excluding comments or banning users for ideological disagreement. Yeah we desperately need a neutral online space for discussing important topics, but keeping it neutral usually doesn't last very long
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 07:11 PM
2

I'm always for calling out dishonest debate and sticking to the topic, but to answer your question about gender issues and the statistical disparity of victims I think we should discuss them how we would discuss any other less controversial sociological problem: by focusing on solutions and not on the identity of the victimizers. As in: "Drunk driving is a problem we can identify solutions for" "Gang violence is a problem that I think these solutions might work for" instead of "[insert demograph…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 06:58 PM
2

It’s because of piece of shit men like this that better men get questioned and doubted. Men need to hold each other accountable before we can seriously question and challenge what we find problematic with modern feminism. I agree that POS men ruin it for other men, but there's no "obligation" for decent men to repair our collective reputation or exhort other men to act right. Nor is it impossible to do those things if you wanted to and criticize the bad parts of feminism at the same time. You ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 06:05 PM
7

Reminds me of that classic Chris Rock bit about women who like rap music despite rappers being misogynistic. "Well he ain't talkin bout ME!"
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 05:55 PM
2

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 07:22 AM
3

Don't forget standardcels are also arguably volcels. Which is ultimately meaningless as a label of character assuming they do in fact get attention from women but just not the ones they're hoping for.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 05:30 AM
1

Do you think it's likely that the proportion of lesbian women is that much higher than the proportion of gay men?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/23 06:59 PM
5

No one is arguing that the woman can't say "no"
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/23 06:46 PM
3

Do you live in a culture where you accost strangers on the street and ask if they want to be friends? No one who's properly socialized literally goes up to strangers and asks "wanna be friends?" Or goes up to a woman and asks "Can I have your number?" immediately without any small talk. That's oversimplying socialization. But yes I do live in a culture where it's normal and socially accepted to strike up conversation with strangers and become friends with them organically because you had a great…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/23 06:37 PM
2

One is an act of kindness, the other is an intrusion. I don't know if you live in a culture where small talk is taboo or something, but talking to a stranger isn't an intrusion. Also how do you make friends if not meeting people who are strangers to you for the first time and RISKING making them uncomfortable by initiating conversation? I reject condescension from someone who demands something of women he doesn't demand of men. Your agenda is showing. You're putting words in my mouth, I would de…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/23 06:20 PM
4

Why do you feel that unwanted interruption and solicitation is respectful? Why do you think it's "unwanted" by default? Every woman is different. More importantly should social animals avoid all uncomfortable social situations because they're potentially (unverifiably) unwanted? Is that level of (risk-)avoidance actually healthy or conducive to growth? We live in a society, by nature talking to someone is a neutral act unless the person protests otherwise or gives an obvious indication they don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/23 06:10 PM
2

I'm not sure if so many here at PPD purposely ignore the point or have a hard time understanding it. People aren't fighting against the idea of most young women not being attracted to older men, that's a personal thing that no one can control. They're fighting against the stereotype that age gaps are always inherently predatory. "AAGALT," if you will. In other words, no one is disallowing women's preferences. But those women are often insulting the people who don't fit their preferences (the old…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/23 05:39 PM
1

"Same energy" argument doesn't make sense here, because men and women often have opposing preferences. Most guys don't prefer women who are signicantly taller and more muscular than themselves, but that doesn't mean women feel the same way because you should "apply the same energy." Also there are plenty of older women who are attractive, there's no set "Wall." Thinking otherwise is ridiculous, equally as ridiculous as a young woman with a 3-4 years older boyfriend claiming that any woman with a…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/23 05:36 PM
4

That's one side of it. The other side is fighting back against a stereotype that age gaps are predatory, often instigated by women without provocation. So it's a vicious, never-ending spiral whenever the topic of age difference comes up.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/23 05:29 PM
3

Maybe so, but the point they have in common is that the system is inaccurately characterized as a meritocracy by its proponents (capitalists,many bluepillers) and most people would agree in the billionaire example that normies shouldn't have to work 80 hours a week to increase their odds of becoming rich by some small percentage. Unless you're a conservative, in which case that kind of "pull yourself up by the bootstraps" mentality would actually be fairly consistent with your views and not as h…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/23 03:34 AM
1

Unless he's socially awkward
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/23 03:26 AM
3

"Everything I disagree with is black and white, everything I agree with is complex and nuanced."
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/23 03:22 AM

Where else would you meet a Japanese nationalist trynna curve a Korean American obsessed with international dating Now I'm curious what that conversation must have looked like
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/23 04:56 AM
5

I just don't think that most red pill guys are going to publicize in real life that they follow red pill, unless they're already internet famous. They just silently believe in it. Even having a Reddit account is embarrassing for most people to admit in real life it seems like lol
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/23 01:18 AM
3

I think there's an obvious possibility you're overlooking here. Even if RP guys legitimately became successful and earnestly started teaching others their ways, to you they would still look like "pickup artists" and "dating coaches" and you wouldn't believe them anyway. And for you to hear about them in the first place they'd have to be successful enough on some social media platform for them to show up in your algorithm, but your first assumption would likely be "they're a grifter trying to get…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/23 12:48 AM
1

No medical or psychological treatment has a 100% success rate, real life doesn't work that way. That's like thinking everyone who's ever committed suicide must have done so because they weren't "trying hard enough" and "gained too much from playing the victim."
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/23 03:54 AM
0

Earning $50k a year doesn't disqualify you from every single woman, but it's also naive to think that "women don't care about how much money you actually make" or what your job is. Financial stability and lifestyle is a HUGE factor, let's not kid ourselves. "What do you do" is literally one of the first questions that people (women especially) tend to ask when getting to know someone, and there are pretty obvious material reasons why a guy who's a doctor tends to get more attention on dating app…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/23 03:48 AM
1

But I can't shake the thought that there are a significant portion of "modern" (I use that term very loosely) women who claim to be such strong independent women, fighting for their rights, career oriented etc. yet still somehow expect their man to earn more than them. Yeah I'm with you there, can't have your cake and eat it too if you purport to be a woman who's modern and progressive. At least if you act on that expectation in a shaming or combative way. However, from your initial comment I re…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 08:25 PM
1

Well using anecdotal evidence isn't a great argumentative strategy either. At least when you're trying to disprove something exists through lack of said evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 07:52 PM
1

Yeah ignoring stats without explaining why they're wrong isn't a great argumentative strategy.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 07:26 PM
1

Yeah the unequal distribution of housework issue is a real point of contention. But I'm talking more about the salary/attraction issue which the guy (and the woman to an extent) has less control over. As progressive as modern society tries to be, there are still many women who would be turned off if they made more money and were more financially successful than a potential date or an SO in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 07:25 PM
1

That also exists, but I'm talking specifically about the "makes more money than him"/"supports him financially" scenario and its effect on some women losing attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 07:20 PM
1

"I can see how that might make" means I understand how some women might think that way in terms of superficial attraction. "Understandable" as in the literal definition of "able to be understood," not that I think it should be encouraged necessarily.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 07:17 PM
-2

Yeah that's a bit of a reach. I doubt there's suddenly loss of attraction if they made the same amount or close to the same amount, for example. But if she made significantly more than him and there was no "progress" on his behalf then I can see how that might make some women second-guess their relationship or start having intrusive thoughts.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 05:54 AM
-1

I see. I'm sure a lot of women feel the same way in that they wouldn't mind it, but whether there's any resentment or loss of attraction that builds up in terms of supporting a male partner long-term (for reasons other than involuntary ones like illness) is another interesting question that I'm not sure what the proportion might be among women. Of course even if only a minority of women were okay with that scenario I doubt it'd be super rare to the extent that I'd have a hard time believing you …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 05:50 AM
1

Did he say women outearning men in general is rare, or women outearning their male partners? Because the first isn't rare, but the second is less common for reasons related to personal preference.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 05:17 AM
13

If you don't socialize, you very likely won't get a date. But the complete reverse isn't true. If you do socialize you likely still won't get a date...unless you actually pull the trigger and potentially change the dynamic of the group and make things awkward by taking the risk of asking her out. That only works well if the two of you are ready at a moment's notice to leave the group if it ends in rejection or you do start dating and then later have a terrible breakup. That residual drama sucks …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 02:58 AM
5

Having a social circle by itself and being surrounded by women isn't going to help you unless you actually hit on them in large numbers. Most guys don't passively get dates by playing it safe and not jeopardizing their friendships. Also if it's a more "homogeneous" group and your personalities don't match then the numbers game might still help but not as much as you think and not always worth the trouble. (If you're a bookworm who hates drinking and partying then it won't matter if you spend eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/23 02:49 AM
10

Theoretically it's not a question of not wanting to dating women in their 30s because they're "past their prime," it's that practically speaking the attractive ones are likely already taken or married with kids by their 30s. So statistically the women that these men on average find most attractive who are still single are going to be younger, all things being equal. Assume that the woman in her 30s is attractive and fit and that she is single at this age because she was late bloomer who didn’t s…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/23 01:17 AM
1

And in the case of women giving dating advice to men there's no "agreement" or "cult" dynamic on the part of the men. There's more than enough blame to go around.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/23 11:02 PM
8

On the one hand cancer sucks. On the other hand it was probably wildly irresponsible for him to promote smoking cigars to "raise your testosterone."
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/23 10:55 PM
0

I'm not speaking for myself, and your argument seems misguided at best and dishonest at worst. You're absolving content creators from being responsible for what they say on social media and putting the blame on their impressionable followers. If it were Andrew Tate dispensing advice to young men would you give the same dismissive response and just leave it at that? Or would you direct the bulk of your criticism towards the man himself for using social media as a platform to spread erroneous/obje…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/23 05:23 PM
-2

Nothing I said precludes men from listening to and accommodating the specific, individual woman he is interested in or committed to. I don't know why this is such a difficult concept for you to wrap your mind around. You're not listening to me. As I said, advice on social media is often presented as generic statements of absolute truth without this level of nuance at all. Which can be confusing for many young men (who use social media) and are in need of more targeted advice, since you can't exp…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/23 05:49 AM
3

Just because some random person presumes to speak for everyone doesn't mean you have to play along with them. Then the entire idea that "men should LISTEN to women and accommodate their PreferencesTM and heed their stern exhortations" that's popular on social media is impossible to act upon, precisely because women don't all think the same. Which means that giving any kind of advice as a woman that begins with "men, don't do this" or "don't do that" without immediately being followed by the disc…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/23 05:03 AM
2

How would even you know whether someone else you don't know is happy or not? You just come right out the gate assuming "they are happy." If most people are average then there's no reason to think they're not also feeling "average" on a daily basis. Not unhappy but not happy either.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/23 01:01 AM
2

ACAB (All Cats Are Beautiful)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 04:56 AM
4

Or just crap genetics
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 02:21 AM
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