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Boddicca Archive

View 0 posts and 40 comments by Boddicca on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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9

The Gift Of Fear pointed out stuff like that as building a false sense of common purpose or togetherness, Forced Teaming. Good job trusting your gut OP
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 02:36 PM
9

Yep. I grew up somewhere patriarchal so I’ve always been a strong feminist in terms of advocating for women’s rights - equality not supremacy over men. I loved men and dated so many and treated them fairly. And yet almost all of them have called me a man-hater for insisting on making my own decisions about my life and body. Not about theirs, about mine. So illuminating that refusing to bow to their will means you hate them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 02:30 PM
6

Yeah I know how it feels to watch all your friends get married and start families. An old childhood friend of mine just announced her pregnancy today and it reminded me that almost all my friends have done this by now. But I remind myself that I don’t know what her relationship is actually like beyond social media. Especially when almost all the couples I know IRL seem to hate each other in person but have glowing social media presences
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 11:32 PM
57

Haha so I had just started seeing a new guy. He told me one of his friends was worried that I might be a gold-digger. I acted surprised and I was like, “then I wouldn’t be with you because [other guy I was dating that he knew about] has a ton more money” (very true for the record and we all knew it). He looked taken aback for a second. Then a couple months later he started up a stink about how he feels insecure that my other guy is so much wealthier. They just want something to hold over you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 12:14 AM
4

Ignore them, being monogamous is 100% valid and you don’t have to explain or justify it. For the record, I’m poly but men wouldn’t dare try the “it’s what men want” line on me because I actively have relationships with multiple guys and I’d love to see them try to impede that. Honestly it fits my FDS principle because it keeps them on their toes and they don’t take me for granted- no low-effort BS because they know another one of my partners will do better. Helps me maintain the plentiful mindse…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 12:07 AM
1

Omg yes. Sorry for blowing up your comments but yessss I’m relating so hard. My ex got mad once - at the end of a fun day together, we were cuddling and I said I hoped he wouldn’t be too sad when he goes back home (we were in a LDR and he was depressive). He blew up over that. Was I saying he’s weak, how dare I bring him down after we had such a good day, I ruined his mood, etc. Ridiculous
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:31 PM
2

You’re so right. More to your point about them pretending to be empaths- their “empathetic” gestures just don’t feel right. Example: My narc ex would do strange things, like waiting for me to come home from the airport holding a glass of water to hand to me in a very servile manner, almost bowing. What? I don’t want to be served hand and foot like that. In a real context it comes across as very jarring, yet he thought he was being so thoughtful. But he lacked practical empathy- he dated a woman …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:14 PM
1

Yesss. We girls think we’re emotionally connecting and showing them the points we’re sensitive about so they know what to avoid and protect, WRONG. Unless they’re vetted, it’s just giving intel to the adversary. And I’ve seen men do a 180 in personality at the 1 year mark so it takes at least that long
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:09 PM
1

The insecurity is what leads to narcissism. I avoid insecure men like the plague, they will put you down to make themselves feel better. I took the Big Five personality test with my NVM ex and while I came up well-adjusted with very low neuroticism, his neuroticism levels were off the charts. He was shocked. The explanation mentioned how neurotic people tend to have unhappy partners and fractious relationships and homeboy was shocked, just shocked, that he was the root of his problems 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:01 PM
7

I don’t think this is fake. I worked front desk at a hotel in college, once saw this guy with a very young girlfriend come in. She seemed very shy and he was openly contemptuous of her- eventually I found her sobbing in our lobby. I actually asked the male guest about it. He seemed embarrassed and told me to pay no mind to her cause she’s “dramatic”. The next time I found her sobbing, I encouraged her to call her family to go home and she did
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 03:36 PM
4

Good luck, I really hope it works for you :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 08:25 PM
29

I’m sorry if this sounds like pseudo-spiritual BS, I promise that I’m actually a hard-nosed atheist but I think this might work for you, bear with me. Have you ever tried meditating? You know how you’re supposed to focus your thoughts only on your breath, but your mind inevitably wanders to other topics? Every time that happens, you’re supposed to simply bring back your thoughts to focusing on your breath, without feeling guilty for getting off-track. At first, your mind might wander off every 5…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 04:51 PM
53

Hmm in my experience they do not understand consent and boundaries. They only seem to care about what benefits them without thinking of the other person’s wants and needs. You see this here. He’s excited that he likes her and she lives conveniently close to him. Those are his only considerations
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 06:33 AM
1

While I agree with you, I’d say my expectation of WOC is that they do speak up so that diverse voices be heard, not that their every action/statement has to be perfectly calibrated and high-level feminism. That’s not an appropriate expectation of any individual - especially considering how every person’s definition of what is performative or not wildly differs. In that regard - my expectation that powerful WOC speak up - Jameela has met my expectation. She is using her voice/ fame to bring atten…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 06:16 PM
3

Hmm as a biracial child of Indian and black immigrants, everything we do doesn’t have to be nuanced and intersectional and PhD level. We don’t have that expectation of white celebrities, it isn’t fair. Sometimes we just want to help the best we can and it turns out to be not perfect, that’s still better than doing nothing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 06:02 PM
23

Agreed. She may be going about things poorly but at least she’s not sitting there going “I’m not a feminist” like that bland Divergent pickme Shailene Woodley. Misplaced anger in this thread
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 04:57 PM
7

Tech (lots of incel misogyny), surgeons and fund managers (arrogance), social workers (really good front at first then nonstop emotional abuse) and a chef kissed me after I said no once then when I called him out, yelled at me because he paid for dinner earlier (he insisted so loud he almost made a scene in the dining room so I let him)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 04:39 PM
10

The higher level the worse it is...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 04:32 PM
3

Noah get the boat🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 03:07 AM
2

The good old cinq a sept
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 02:40 PM
11

You’re right on so many levels. The culture sees it as the woman’s job to care for the man even as it grinds her down and she gets nothing back. When I met him, he was a neurotic wreck. He was resistant to therapy so I asked what his parents had recommended. They believe that him getting married will fix all his issues (!) Not therapy or medication, but literally his wife would swoop in and fix everything for him. Incredible. The enmeshment with his mom was something else too - shared bed during…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 07:15 PM
24

Notice how with Indian men it’s all about what they want without a thought for what you might want. All he could think about were his fetishes, I bet it never occurred to him that you might not want his gross self. And if it did, it wasn’t important enough to register. I remember that after the breakup, my ex said that if I truly loved him, I would change myself for him. So I asked if that’s true and he truly loved me, why couldn’t he change himself for me? Shocked Pikachu face followed by some …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 04:24 AM
33

Ah for fucks sakes, I’m so sorry you were creeped on by this absolute perv during a beautiful time in your life. I have a theory that the culture is so sexually repressed that it creates all sorts of depravities in the men. So many levels of disgusting. And the wife! Even in libfem circles it’s a big no-no to impose your kinks and morality on other people, much less ambush your friends with it. I’m so grossed out on your behalf, what an absolute pickme she was.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 03:55 AM
32

Omfg. What a familiar nightmare. He used to bitch about how white girls never want to date desis and also bitch about desi girls who date white guys, like me 🙄 he legit both envied and despised me for it. I straight up told him that it’s because other races treat women WAY better and I never have to hear anything about “gori ladkis” and the color of my skin being too brown. The parents too, ugh. The less said the better. I don’t blame you for staying away, I do too. I’m glad you walked away and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 03:45 AM
42

Oh my lord the narcissism. This guy actually told me that I’m lucky he’s so good in bed 🤣🤣🤣 He definitely was but good dick’s a dime a dozen 🤦🏾‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 03:24 AM
17

I appreciate it :) don’t worry, always had that gut feeling so I turned down his high-pressure proposals. He shares a bed with his mom when she visits! Even though there’s a spare room for a bed plus a couch! Should have left right then and there lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 11:52 PM
5

If a guy can’t put a label on it after 2 months (3 max) I walk. Life is short and we’re all adults here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 11:35 PM
16

Don’t give in. If you regret not having a child, your life will still be awesome and unchanged. If you regret having a child, you’re fucked. You can’t get rid of a kid and it’s a 20+ yr commitment that will change every aspect of your daily life. I’ve been under this intense sort of pressure before. I just kept repeating NO and kept my IUD in. What are they gonna do, rip it out of me? The story ends here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 11:30 PM
9

Hello OP. I’m childfree as well. I’m always upfront about it and I do tell partners that I don’t see a need for children- too expensive, takes too much time, takes over your life, ruins your body, every single parent I know is miserable, and for what? What’s in it for me? They’ve replied “to see a mini-you”. I reply I’m not that narcissistic. They’ve said “to shape a life and teach your values” well that’s why I’m in Big Brothers Big Sisters. I’ve still gotten dumped twice by men who thought the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 11:27 PM
96

Hear hear. I used to have a strict ban on dating Indian men for all the reasons you mentioned above, plus one more: I’m also half black and the racism is unreal. Then I met an India-born man here in the US who seemed like a HVM unicorn. Well-educated, dream job, bespoke suits, amazing and generous in bed, owns his own condo that looks great and is very clean. Seems great right? Nope. The entitlement that Indian culture breeds in their men is horrible and never goes away. He started negging me an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 10:45 PM
14

Let me tell you about my inexperienced pickme days. I was 22, freshly graduated right around the Great Recession making 24K a year and struggling. My SO at the time made 150K a year in tech. Guess who did the dance and paid 50/50 (so a way way bigger % of our salaries) and even bought him dinner sometimes? 🤡🤡 Then once we were at a corporate dinner for him and a coworker asked how he got a girl like me, and another tech bro drunkenly chimed in “lots of money”. Shocked looks all around. All this …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 10:00 PM
6

I’m glad you agree! And I’m totally with you on building a career and saving up for an awesome house and future too. Your goals may not be Instagram-hot but stability and community is sexy. Not worrying about bills is awesome. So is having “fuck you” money. Best of luck to you and enjoy your path exactly the way you want it to be!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 05:02 AM
17

So many women, too :) I was in a really bad car accident a few years ago. My life did flash before my eyes (hah) and it was all things I did and places I saw, not a thought for my possessions and money. Since then I don’t own a lot. But you’re right and there needs to be balance, a solid life foundation. Nobody wants a dude with nasty toenails begging for airfare from poor Cambodians 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:49 AM
76

Or worse, high-earning ones who don’t want a “gold digger” so their women end up paying more than 50/50 to prove that she’s not in it for the money. Barf.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:38 AM
45

Some people would rather drive a 2005 Honda and spend 6 months a year overseas, sounds like that’s not you and that’s okay. Some of them are running from responsibilities, others don’t prioritize material possessions as much. It’s just a compatibility issue. I work remote with flexible hours and this is something that I could do while building my career and being responsible so it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re all man-children BUT Honestly, fuck em 🤷🏾‍♀️If you don’t want to travel extensively…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:34 AM
5

I don’t accept money from NVM. It’s not given in a spirit of generosity and has strings attached, and I don’t do strings with NVM
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 12:49 AM
21

This doesn’t seem healthy tbh. You can’t grey rock the entire world. Honestly, I would try building up my self-confidence until I could act however I want and not care about the gossip. You should realize people will gossip about you whether you’re flawless, super flawed, or boring. Externalize these hurts- when people betray your trust, that reflects on them not on you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 12:41 AM
14

An insult to estrogen haha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 04:07 AM
9

Back in my pickme days I bought my fiancé an Xbox for Xmas, and he proceeded to play it for 8-10 hours a day for a straight year. Never again. Since then, they get adult presents, leather items etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 04:07 AM
18

I know, saw the news and almost started hyperventilating. So upset I briefly considered texting my LV ex (!) but came here for support instead
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 02:27 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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