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BonsaiSoul Archive

View 0 posts and 64 comments by BonsaiSoul on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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10

Society on average when a woman laments being valued conditionally dependent on how well she fits traditional gender roles: "That's oppression, why are men like this" Society on average when a man laments being valued conditionally dependent on how well he fits traditional gender roles: "Stop whining, why are men like this" That gap is why Chris Rock's bit lands despite it being pretty obvious that both genders experience this.
/r/MenSupportMen01/02/25 07:45 AM
1

Because "these people need strong group identity to protect themselves from you people" is just the matching shoe to "you don't need a group identity you're the oppressor" messaging that artificially causes this intentional, systemic disparity.
/r/MenSupportMen27/01/25 02:48 AM
7

A straight person having in-group bias is defined as homophobia. A white person having in-group bias is defined as a white supremacist. There's no "ist" word for opposing cuckoldry yet but there will be soon enough! Only the "cultural proletariat" is allowed to have an identity or an in-group. The "cultural bourgeoisie" is not. It's not an accident, an oversight, hypocrisy, or a double standard.
/r/MenSupportMen25/01/25 07:00 PM
17

Boys aren't taught that they have an in-group. Men are socialized to aggressively compete with each other. Collectivism for them and atomized 'rugged individualism' for us. A common power dynamic in the west.
/r/MenSupportMen25/01/25 06:51 PM
25

Gendered abuse trauma
/r/MenSupportMen26/12/24 10:34 PM
2

Shaming people and judging their whole character for shit that's literally outside their control is a red flag. I wouldn't want to date someone who thinks that's OK. Attraction falls under this too- it's largely biological! Thankfully, people are only emboldened to act like that on dating apps and pseudo-anonymous social media. No shot they act like that in front of their dad. It's EXTREMELY overamplified by the internet.
/r/MenSupportMen09/12/24 01:59 PM
2

She's right but this petition is from 2018 I've never in my life seen a change.org petition result in something important changing. Internet petitions are in general a circular file for people who don't have a better platform to be heard.
/r/MenSupportMen28/11/24 01:20 PM
5

Just wanted to say I know how hard it can be to find a place that you can feel like you belong when you don't quite fit into a neatly defined archetype, and I hope you find something. I do have a suggestion. I had some good experiences with a peer support app called innerworld- it's actually built on discord, but also has a simplified 3d "game" interface on top of that. It's explicitly LGBT-friendly and there was a regular mens' group that was trans-accepting. The main instance is also adults-on…
/r/MenSupportMen17/09/24 03:43 AM
4

A lot of those same groups, and other less specific ones, have resources on their websites for people looking to start a new chapter. If your ideal is to start a local men's support group, then you'll be able to get information, training and materials like handouts and programs to help with that. In a more general context, the keyword to search is "peer support," and there's a lot of resources(some of which are free) aimed at building out peer support in communities. You can find online workshop…
/r/MenSupportMen10/09/24 02:56 AM
6

This phenomenon is way bigger than "feminism," there is a fundamental dishonesty in some segments of society that they're willing to distort reality to fit their feelings. Entire branches of science have this issue and then it's still used to set policy and people who question it are accused of being anti-intellectual. Rather than feminism I would say it's centered on sociology which is heavily inflenced by marxism and other extremist views.
/r/MenSupportMen13/08/24 01:33 AM
25

Do you think they talk like this to their father? Who am I kidding, they don't talk to their father at all lmao. These people are dregs, you are better than them. You don't want their approval or their diseases. Body dysmorphia is a problem that you're going to need therapy to solve. You need to build your self-worth and change how you think. You deserve to feel like a king and not let peasants tear you down. If any penis enlargement product worked, it would be one of the most-consumed things on…
/r/MenSupportMen01/08/24 07:18 PM
8

Guys get called "creepy" over trivial/subjective things: smell bad, breathe loud, autism affect, wrong haircut, acne, physical characteristics. Made someone vaguely uncomfortable once. Then it's used to treat them like a murderer or rapist sometimes behind their back, people will tell their friends and post their picture online without consent and shit. This behavior starts in middle school too and can hurt someone's entire life. On what planet is that not just harassment and slander? Anybody su…
/r/MenSupportMen01/06/24 12:37 PM
2

chatbots are not up to the task of providing safe, ethical therapy/"meditations" etc
/r/MenSupportMen10/04/24 04:30 PM
20

Most people are wholly ignorant of what it's like to live with a mental illness, with personality disorders, with trauma, in abject loneliness. And when presented with it they turn to apex fallacy reasoning like, obviously we're just not working hard enough or doing something else to deserve it or because you're not feminist/religious/traditional/some other ideology enough. And some will then take advantage. I do not believe it's a gendered problem but a problem in opening up to people who haven…
/r/MenSupportMen23/03/24 01:24 PM
3

I have a few but I wouldn't want them to get dirty, plus my bed is already full of pillows
/r/MenSupportMen12/10/23 04:49 PM
4

Judge their parents, communities, and society first. Children don't raise themselves
/r/MenSupportMen01/09/23 05:02 PM
29

This, too, is the manosphere. Some people try and reduce that word to just its hardest-to-sympathize-with denominator, but it encompasses spaces that center men talking about our feelings, lived experience and things affecting us without being talked over. In the same way that feminism is more properly a plurality of "feminisms" that don't always align and may even contradict each other, men's spaces also vary wildly. There are also spaces like this one. There are places and lifestyles that are …
/r/MenSupportMen04/07/23 02:22 AM
8

Dating apps are already an unethical hellscape and these "journalists" said nothing because it was imbalanced in favor of women. Now there's a chance a man might use this to get a chance at a date, and it's not like it's going to give him any kind of advantage in person! But now they're offended. That's nothing but anti-male bias. This sounds like it's tipping the balance on an unfair platform and costing predators money while pissing off misandrists... sounds like Ws all around. You haven't don…
/r/MenSupportMen27/06/23 03:00 PM
4

old.reddit and RES on desktop are the only version of reddit I intend to use, and I also use the third party tool reveddit very frequently to check what's been removed and why; this path forward for reddit doesn't include me. But that's how it's been with every technology-related thing for decades and any attempt at thwarting it has consistently been drowned out by countless millions who simply don't care because they were raised to fall for anything. It basically requires a legal solution, and …
/r/MenSupportMen03/06/23 06:57 PM
4

Those are mostly just stereotypes my dude.
/r/MenSupportMen18/05/23 11:06 AM
6

All men are good men by default.
/r/MenSupportMen18/05/23 11:06 AM
10

From what I hear, they're full of illegal revenge porn, identity theft, stalking and calls for harassment. That definitely has real world effects when it happens to women so to imagine it doesn't affect men would be absurd. Unfortunately expecting anybody to protect boys and men from that kind of behavior is similarly distant from reality. You'll just have to accept that a horrible person who hates your gender voluntarily saw themselves out of your life as a consolation prize.
/r/MenSupportMen17/05/23 07:37 PM
1

It's in the same realm as any other kind of twitter/tumblr politics, it's traumagenic and very rare among people who have lives outside the internet; it will be hyperconcentrated in online spaces at a rate directly correlated with the relevance of the space you're in to mental health and inversely related to age and success.
/r/MenSupportMen11/05/23 03:06 AM
1

Well do you want to take up a martial art or be a UFC bloodsport knucklehead? If the former, a lot of times you can find classes for common arts at the YMCA, and your parents would be hard pressed to argue against "I want to get a YMCA membership." Can be better quality than you'd expect too, I did TKD for a while and the instructor was an ITF 7th dan; he had his own school but also led classes at the Y. If the latter your parents are right, getting CTE doesn't make you brave or strong it makes …
/r/MenSupportMen07/05/23 01:58 AM
7

Anybody going around promising they have the one secret that will change your whole life is not above board no matter what kind of pill they're claiming to be
/r/MenSupportMen25/04/23 07:29 PM
1

It's not healthy, no, but it's something you have to protect yourself from.
/r/MenSupportMen02/04/23 12:59 PM
1

You're getting offended by words and it's affecting your empathy. Case in point: Attraction is not a choice. You are only applying this to one side of a two-sided interaction. He is attracted to her. She is not attracted to him. They want different things from the relationship. Neither did that on purpose or did anything wrong for feeling the way they do. It doesn't make either of them emotionally undeveloped, that's rude. Thinking you can read other people's minds is not intuition. People whose…
/r/MenSupportMen31/03/23 01:55 AM
1

A relationship where one side has unrequited feelings and wants something else out of it cannot function as a friendship. And you don't fix it by leaning into it, denying your feelings and playing along. You fix it by separating from the person until the feelings subside. You can be friends then.
/r/MenSupportMen31/03/23 01:50 AM
5

Garbage in garbage out. The defaults and most large subs are garbage. Ads are garbage, most "news" is garbage, politics is garbage... your brain deserves better food than that
/r/MenSupportMen31/03/23 01:36 AM
4

That article is about overcoming social anxiety due to fear of rejection. That's only one out of a hundred factors behind the loneliness problem.
/r/MenSupportMen29/01/23 05:07 AM
2

I don't watch youtube personality cult gurus like that, but it is so huge for someone to get this because no therapist seems to- I've been planning and wanting to improve in so many ways for so many years and my mental health is the thing getting in the way. But you talk to anyone and they can only talk about the reverse, saying my mental health would be great if I'd just do all those things, like I'd never thought of that. Nah the consequences of trauma and neglect weren't caused by not lifting
/r/MenSupportMen30/12/22 05:38 AM
4

We've got needs as people and being able to get those needs met is a marker of social success- but not the top marker, plenty of people bumble from one shitty situation to the next or use sex as self-harm and other unenviable patterns. And not having that success is not a moral failure in the same way that being poor, not having some level of education etc are morally neutral. It's not moral however to see someone who is down and kick them and laugh... these people aren't your friends and your f…
/r/MenSupportMen05/12/22 04:46 AM
10

“He who is not angry when there is just cause for anger is immoral. Why? Because anger looks to the good of justice. And if you can live amid injustice without anger, you are immoral as well as unjust.” — Thomas Aquinas Instead of trying to "fix" being angry, indignant, sad or other painful, inconvenient or disruptive emotions, learn to manage your feelings better so you can live with them. Because the parts of you that you neglect will stab you in the back later.
/r/MenSupportMen25/10/22 10:49 PM
1

Two problems here. First, external problem, "I'm uncomfortable." That's a fact statement, and other people shouldn't want to make you uncomfortable on purpose. So telling someone that should be a signal for them to at least reel it back regardless of what it is. Second, internal problem, "inappropriate/dirty/disguting." These are opinions- no doubt derived from a lifetime of exposure to negative messages about male sexuality. I think you should take a good look inside yourself to make sure you d…
/r/MenSupportMen12/10/22 03:27 PM
4

It's definitely used that way, and this is an example imo
/r/MenSupportMen24/09/22 07:24 PM
5

I mean "incel"
/r/MenSupportMen24/09/22 07:10 PM
9

The word is just a slur at this point and we should start treating it like one.
/r/MenSupportMen24/09/22 06:56 PM
7

He's not renowned for being a clinical psychologist or a professor, he's renowned for telling traumatised and disenfranchised boys and men that they just need to man up, a position that is not supported by psychology, justice, reality, or anything other than convenience for the corrupt status quo. Emeritus is an honorary title for a former professor, and he was not "teaching" his current brand of BS when he was an actual professor, or he would have been fired. He doesn't deserve to be called a d…
/r/MensRights07/09/22 03:47 PM
1

If advice sounds insulting, it's probably because it's bad advice. That can include advice that might help someone with a much smaller or different problem. Which can often be because, yep, people project themselves onto you and give "advice" based on the limits of their experience instead of trying to understand.
/r/MenSupportMen28/08/22 10:18 PM
2

They would rather help us die than help us live, it's easier and gets us out of their way, just like has always been their first priority you shouldn't let them have their way
/r/MenSupportMen28/06/22 03:17 AM
7

Sounds pretty simple- she doesn't date clients/potential clients. She is probably just being charming for professional reasons and not personal ones. And the things that are hurting you are probably not things she's doing on purpose- it's likely she's not thinking about you at all. Hurts to be told you were misled, but that's what it sounds like. If you can't move on, switch gyms. Most important thing is your own sanity, and the best thing for that is physically removing yourself from the situat…
/r/MenSupportMen15/06/22 09:46 AM
5

Addiction is a mental health issue. How did you get diagnosed with this condition? What professional resources have you sought out for dealing with this problem. Because I'll tell you, there are a lot of young men who have "self-diagnosed" and suffered great guilt and shame after being exposed to inaccurate, harmful information about their sexuality from online groups ideologically opposed to masturbation and pornography. If that's you, you need to escape from that situation and have your issue(…
/r/MenSupportMen01/05/22 06:17 AM
6

Good choice. I hope you succeed!
/r/MenSupportMen23/04/22 01:36 AM
5

The only time I have ever seen "privilege" brought up in public discourse has been to tell whoever the speaker's least favorite gender, skin color, sexual orientation etc happens to be that their perspective doesn't matter, their problems don't count and their voice isn't wanted, because of an invisible, unquantifiable conspiracy We don't need words and rhetoric like that, anywhere, aimed at anyone.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates09/12/21 09:22 PM
1

Bad news and news with a bad guy gets more viewers News presented by an attractive woman in a bikini would get more views too. Do you think that would be acceptable in 2021? If e.g. the BBC started having all of their female anchors wear bikinis, what would the public reaction to that be? It's a men's issue because stereotyping and objectifying men is acceptable in 2021 while stereotyping and objectifying women is not acceptable. We want both to be unacceptable; you want to keep stereotyping and…
/r/MensRights13/11/21 12:42 AM
2

Data doesn't really care whether you agree with it or not. They literally COUNTED the times men were portrayed negatively and you're here like "well I don't believe in numbers... I think you're just sexist"
/r/MensRights13/11/21 12:38 AM
12

Sensing a shifting public mood many brands have already taken steps to weed out stereotyping in their communications as well as respect the unintended consequences of their messaging. Among these are consumer goods giant Unilever which has already pledged to end the regurgitation of stereotypical portrayals and work with more businesses run by women and minority groups to improve diversity. I love how the first example they give of things changing actually demonstrates nothing has changed by ver…
/r/MensRights11/11/21 09:15 PM
5

Imagine if someone tried to use this defense in a thread about a guy who cheated on his wife. They'd be thrown out a proverbial window. It's a ridiculous thing to say.
/r/MenSupportMen02/11/21 07:46 PM
1

Measures are taken to protect people from shark attacks. Shark survivors don't get told it's their fault or told to kill themselves or told that people hope they get raped. Shark survivors are treated for the injuries they receive. Shark survivors don't lose their career, family or friends because of it. Shark attack victims are acknowledged and treated with compassion- men accused of sexual impropriety are not, so we have to protect ourselves from getting into that situation in the first place.
/r/MenSupportMen25/09/21 05:38 AM
2

It is an insult. It's used to further otherize and dehumanize outcast men with legitimate feelings, or... even just someone who would make or participate on a subreddit about "men's issues." The people who popularized that word as an insult likely see you and me as potentially being "an incel" just for being here, and that's not something you should accept. Likewise with misogyny- they define misogyny not as hating women but as disagreeing with their opinions about politics and sociology.
/r/MenSupportMen25/09/21 05:18 AM
3

You don't owe anyone a fight. If they demand that of you, they are the one being selfish
/r/MenSupportMen23/09/21 05:27 PM
3

I didn't mean move out, I meant like, go to a friends house or the library or something. So that you're not physically present when the police arrive. Being the lone male in a house when the police are responding to a DV call is not a safe situation
/r/MenSupportMen23/09/21 05:24 PM
9

I hate to have to say this but if it gets bad enough to call the police, OP needs to leave the house and be somewhere else before doing so. Otherwise he's at risk of being targeted by the police instead of his sister
/r/MenSupportMen23/09/21 05:34 AM
1

It's no big deal, most people who know had to find out the hard way. Wait until you check reveddit for the first time and find out how many of your posts and comments just got silently hidden or deleted without telling you
/r/MensRights21/08/21 12:35 AM
10

The guy is full of it but "extremely controversial"?????????? What? He is the most basic of basic selfhelp guru types!
/r/MensRights21/08/21 12:30 AM
1

Several major subreddits have an automated system in place which automatically bans anybody who has ever participated in certain communities. Doesn't matter when how or why. And, if you've never commented or posted on the sub that bans you, you won't even get a notification about it. First time it ever happened to me was many years ago on a long-deleted account, I picked up a ban from /r/offmychest because I commented on what they considered a "hate sub", I think it was fatpeoplehate... I got th…
/r/MensRights21/08/21 12:26 AM
1

Society disregarding the suffering of men is not a novel issue or something limited to Afghanistan. This is just one straw in an entire pile, but it is nevertheless part of the pile. You can't ignore the context.
/r/MensRights21/08/21 12:01 AM
0

20 million people are suffering, and you think they aren't worth mentioning because another 20 million people are suffering more. Do you not understand that those people suffer for each other as well? That what is happening to each affects the other, because they are friends, family, neighbors, co-workers? I cannot believe you would try to disregard the suffering The thing you are accusing others of is what you yourself are doing. nobody here is disregarding the suffering of women- but you are d…
/r/MensRights20/08/21 11:53 PM
1

Yes, women suffer numerous atrocities under theocratic warlords. Humiliation, murder, vitriolage, genital mutilation, forced marriage/rape, the dehumanization of the extremist islamic head and body coverings. This isn't news to anyone who has been paying attention at any point since 9/11. Yes, most people, including most people here, are worried about Afghani women. Nobody here supports or defends such things, and so much as IMPLYING that is absurd and despicably dishonest. The difference is, yo…
/r/MensRights20/08/21 11:40 PM
1

Yes. Not just news articles but posts on reddit. Women women women women children women women. They can be talking about the entire country and still say "those women" like the men don't exist, or are all complicit, or won't be harmed by it.
/r/MensRights20/08/21 11:17 PM
2

Unfortunately, that's true, the nerve endings can't be regrown(Yet. Foregen is working on it.) The physical function of protecting the glans and acting as a lubrication-retaining bearing can still be restored though as I understand it.
/r/MenSupportMen06/08/21 04:54 AM
2

I used to greatly enjoy following current events. But I quit following the news online YEARS ago. For a while I tried to avoid the garbagification of news by controlling what I consumed. I was sticking to specific topical sites like ars technica(which then got gawkered and never recovered) or consumerist(which got bought and shitcanned gee weird.) I focused on interactive aggregators like reddit and fark where even when news was negative or untrue, there were usually better perspectives on it in…
/r/MenSupportMen05/08/21 02:55 AM
5

Most men are good men
/r/MenSupportMen04/08/21 04:19 AM
5

To me, whether it's the "true" meaning of stoicism or not, the word represents to me all of the people out there who think mental illness isn't real and people just need to take responsibility. Who automatically assume people with problems just haven't tried to do anything to fix them, and offer such nuanced advice to them as "touch grass." Libertarians going "actually socioeconomic struggles don't matter because those people are choosing to feel bad about their situation." The people who go aro…
/r/MenSupportMen03/08/21 09:40 AM
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