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Bookchi Archive

View 10 posts and 28 comments by Bookchi on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Thanks for your response! How long were you engaged, if at all?
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/21 03:27 PM
4

I highly recommend OLD. Of all the messages I've received over the years (not counting the low effort ones that just said "hi"), about 75% were "impressed" by my comments in my bio about wanting a family and maybe being a SAHM. Those messages usually included statements like "very few women want that these days" or "it's a breath of fresh air".
/r/RedPillWomen01/08/21 09:44 PM
3

I do this at work already, just didn't know if it translated! Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/21 07:07 PM
7

"What do you think" is a great alternative! It shows you care about his question as well as his input. Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/21 06:15 PM
4

Thanks for the response! Kind of off topic, but was there anything you had to learn or unlearn to make the relationship work? In college, to avoid being a distraction, I blended in by being "one of the guys". My feminity was almost non-existent and I'm trying to get that back. I also tend to plan for the worst case scenario and have backup plans just in case someone can't complete their part of the project (I'm a project manager now). RP is about trusting him and not having backup plans like tha…
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/21 06:13 PM
2

"Men don't vet". Thanks for the clear answer! :) As for red flags, I will keep an eye on this. The first example sounds worse than it actually was. Context matters. The second could be concerning, but I also try to give people the benefit of the doubt once (maybe twice), especially when there are no other red flags.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/21 01:49 PM
2

That's kind of what I was getting at. The "don't initiate/pursue" idea makes me not want to send anything at all in case it could be misinterpreted. I'll figure it out!
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/21 12:14 PM
3

"You’re not sitting around waiting for him because you’re too busy improving yourself as a person and a woman. That’s something men instinctively respect and will respond to much more genuinely than petty relationship games." Yup, this is why I'm not super worried. He knows I'm starting a side-business and was excited to hear last week that I'm shifting to production.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/21 12:11 PM
3

This incident was prior to having read that book. I thought back to this example several times as I read... I'll try not to let it happen again!
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/21 12:03 PM
2

1) yeah, I realized too late that could have been it. I expressed "child-like wonder" a couple times that day, so hopefully that made up for it. 2) I guess we'll see!
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/21 07:16 AM
2

1) haha, yeah, I did say they aren't really the same, but I was a bit distracted by the fact that he brought it up in the first place to actually make a good argument. Not that it matters. That really wasn't the point. I just thought that progression in the conversation was kind of interesting. 2) he's changing roles at his job right now which means he's doing two jobs and working past 7pm every day, so I would totally understand if it's just a matter of being overwhelmed. I'd like to send him s…
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/21 06:56 AM
1

So instead of offering at the time of payment, offer in advance, citing a reason (i.e. you paid last time, I invited you, etc.), and then let him pay if he insists? Sounds reasonable!
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/21 08:44 PM
1

I brought it up during a conversation about work stress and how I was surprised I hadn't gotten one because I'm kind of stressed out. Turns out, he gets them too, haha! Still didn't go past a hug (a longer hug), but that's ok. It didn't feel right yet.
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/21 05:44 AM
2

Yeah, cold sores. I only get one every 2-3 years or so now, but I still have it and it's contagious, even when it's inactive. That makes kissing someone without disclosing that first kind of, I don't know, inconsiderate. :( In hindsight, I should have brought it up during the more serious conditions discussion, but it slipped my mind because it rarely affects me...
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/21 07:59 PM
2

Unfortunately, neither of us drink, haha! (personal preference, not for religious reasons) And in my city, you have to drive everywhere. :( I think I just need to loosen up in my brain. I plan things out and then get all worried about the potential "what if's" and all the things that could go wrong and how to mitigate those risks. It's great for my day job, but not for my life. :)
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/21 07:49 PM
1

What if you've got HSV-1? Would you bring that up on the first date?
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/21 03:15 PM
2

That would be way too intimate for me that soon. Luckily, I'm past the first two already. ;) I've always viewed kissing as a sign of basically being committed (which doesn't make a whole lot of sense). In the past, I've worried way too much about accidentally leading someone on, so I would always keep my distance. In this case though, I'm definitely not leading him on, so really, I should have no problem with this...?
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/21 06:38 AM
4

Thank you for your response! I'll admit that reading that caused a bit of anxiety. I think my main problem will be overcoming my own fear of any sort of physical contact from anyone. I got plenty of hugs and cuddling as a child, so I'm not really sure why I get chills and pull away anytime someone touches even my shoulder. It's something I have to work on. In the meantime, I don't want to scare him off by appearing cold. Your advice should help a bit with that!
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/21 06:30 AM
1

I think it was to have men do some of the weeding out themselves, but it seems like that could easily backfire.
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/20 06:33 AM
3

I've seen a lot of 36ish-year-old profiles who set their preferences to 25-45 and the ones who specifically say they're looking for marriage don't usually have anything lower than 28. People often mistake me for a college student, so I've got that going for me!
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 07:38 PM
3

Your profile sounds kind of masculine, like you have something to prove. "See guys, capable AND feminine! This is my plan for the future, and I can do it all!" I think I've created the profile I want to see, not what he wants to see. I've never been super feminine, especially going through an engineering program where I had to suppress some of that to "fit in". I'm getting better, but it's not properly reflected in my profile. Gotta fix that!
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 05:53 PM
4

Good perspective. Sounds like I'm lacking patience more than anything else!
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 04:43 PM
3

As a little experiment, try taking out ALL the references to your work aside from the parts that are personally meaningful to you. Not monetarily, but show your passion a little. I'll give it a shot! ​ And I think that being up-front about that and that my work was fulfilling-but-not-ultimately-as-fulfilling-as-marriage can help point the spotlight in the right direction. I actually used to have exactly that in my profile, but I replaced it with the starting my own business thing. Maybe I need t…
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 04:42 PM
25

How do they not feel slightly superior and lose respect for their partner? This is what worries me about myself. I'm not a stuck-up person, but deep down, I know that this would likely become an issue for me. ​ You'll filter out the boring guys really quickly this way. Haha, ohhhhh, I've done that already and it dies really quickly. I guess I just need to be more patient.
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 04:15 PM
2

Good advice. Two years ago, my profile was all about my career and accomplishments. After discovering RP, I changed it completely to be more about my goals as a future wife. That definitely improved the quality of the responses I was getting! What I gave above was the short version of what's actually there; it's definitely more family than career oriented. But I'll see if I can tone down the career part a bit more. I'm struggling to find the right balance between accomplishments and future goals…
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 04:10 PM
4

I just read about Hinge today. I'll look it up. Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 03:46 PM
12

In any case,I personally find putting your salary up on your account a bit off putting. And they might think you're also more interested in money above all else. That's exactly what I thought. It just seemed like such strange advice. I'm in the low 100s and I'm perfectly fine with 75k+. I'm more interested in how he handles money than how much he makes. I live frugally, haven't given in to lifestyle creep, and am looking for someone who does the same. But would me making more than he does put a …
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 03:42 PM
1

Thanks for the tips and encouragement! The push to get myself to be more social was intended to increase my chances of actually meeting someone in person, but maybe I shouldn't focus on that so much since I haven't been successful up to this point? I cook all my own (relatively healthy) food and rarely eat out. I've been working on my acne for two years now and while it's not perfect yet, I've made tremendous progress. I'm all set weight-wise (5'8", 125 lbs.), although adding some sort of exerci…
/r/RedPillWomen29/06/19 01:49 AM
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