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BusinessTwistofLime Archive

View 5 posts and 350 comments by BusinessTwistofLime on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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63

He seems like such a kind person. I wish more people with kind hearts were given such recognition. We could start to change the world by prioritizing good people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/22 06:35 AM
328

Why is FDS making posts that look like Instagram tabloid stories? I miss our threads filled with discussion and women trying to uplift one another. Gah. I'm glad they're allowing comments though so I guess there's that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/22 06:33 AM
112

There's also the misrepresentation of what they're looking for. For the more relationship oriented apps, they have "looking for a relationship" but then on Tinder/more hook-up oriented apps they're down for everything! One woman on here commented about creating a fake profile so she could see if these guys were posting more hook-up oriented profiles on Tinder (which are probably closer to the truth) vs Hinge/Bumble. If she saw that they were down for hook-ups on Tinder, she stopped talking to th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 05:24 AM
1

I love homemade tamales! That recipe is probably a family heirloom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 10:15 PM
25

Yikes. My heart goes out to the women in Virginia.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/21 01:03 AM
13

My understanding is that it's basically a coping mechanism to help protect yourself by better knowing the mindset of your abusers growing up. You're more attuned to their moods and emotions in an effort to neutralize them or know when to avoid them if they're angry/upset. As adults, being an empath is a sign that there's more boundary work to be done with a therapist so that you can avoid taking on people's emotional states. Thanks for sharing the quotes from the studies!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/21 12:45 AM
17

Congratulations on helping heal the intergenerational trauma your family experienced. It isn't easy, and it takes a lot of courage to undo those patterns. I hope you celebrate yourself and the work you're doing. Hugs to you. You're making a difference in the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/21 07:21 PM
3

Did you play any games at the cabin? How did you entertain yourself?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/21 07:15 PM
12

This brings joy to my heart. Thank you for sharing this memory! ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/21 08:56 AM
8

I would not be surprised if they shared mutual feelings.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/21 08:40 AM
13

OMG! I can feel the belly laughs coming from this photo! Thank you for sharing! This is a great two-for-one post! Gift ideas and sharing such a fun memory!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/21 04:10 AM
18

That sounds like a lovely gesture! How thoughtful of him. I'm glad you found someone who cares about you enough to plan these kinds of things. I hope you both have a wonderful holiday season this year.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 11:09 PM
23

The activity was voluntary. Other people chose not to participate. They didn't make it about themselves like this guy did. It's ridiculous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 10:32 PM
15

Oh man! Mixed tapes and CDs were a love language to me growing up! I'm glad to hear they haven't gone completely out of style.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 10:23 PM
32

This sounds like an amazing Christmas for yourself! I'm glad you were able to make it special for yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 10:22 PM
13

That sounds like so much fun! Thank you for sharing! I love seeing the excitement of young kids celebrating the holidays!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 08:43 PM
32

Yum! I love the fragrance of citrus fruits! I had roasted chestnuts for the first time last year and it was such a treat! I wish they were more of a holiday tradition in my country!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 07:07 PM
14

You had me in the first half. Thought the mods let a scrote post for a second. 😂💀 Where the hell is my coffee.....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 04:49 PM
220

Don't forget to tell him to chill out because he's overreacting in front of the kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/21 03:32 AM
32

It's for the homeless looking hipsters when they aren't wearing their stringy, oily man buns.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/21 10:44 PM
23

But but but age is just a number! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/21 10:42 PM
9

On and off? Why? What changed each time you two decided to get back together? It seems like he can treat you however he wants and given enough time you'll get back together with him. I would stop wasting my time on someone who can't be bothered to CoMmUniCaTe. He might have even done this on purpose with the screenshot to try to rile you up and make you feel insecure. He's been "friends" with this person for 10 years and this is the first time you've heard about her? Doesn't seem like much of a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 08:37 PM
29

A woman in my group of high school friends is dating a LVM. The other women in our group have commented on her changing behavior that more closely resembles his behavior and outbursts. We've also noticed lots of projection where she accuses different friends of behaving in ways that she is notorious for doing herself. Your explanation makes a lot of sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 07:41 PM
32

Don't forget to call 311 for that large item trash pickup. 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 07:15 PM
15

Your selfie is a piece of information that can be used to doxx you by other Redditors (usually angry scrotes/misogynistic folks). There are women who have posted on here that have received death threats merely from posting things on the FDS sub. Personal security on the internet is important especially with Reddit and FDS. The other commenter was trying to help you stay safe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/21 03:58 AM
40

For greater visibility, would you mind making a post about this? I've never heard of this before, and I'm sure women could find this helpful if they're living in countries/states that restrict or outlaw abortion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/21 03:48 AM
20

Yesss! I was scrolling down for someone to say this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/21 03:39 AM
13

You're welcome! I usually can't stomach gross loss of human life like in gruesome horror movies (like human centipede). While the violence was quite tragic and horrible at certain times in the series, it helped create a sense of dread that is all too often similar to what I feel in real life. I think that was what made it so incredibly heavy for me after watching an episode. Like we aren't that far off from the Handmaid's Tale world especially when we see the very real possibility of Roe v Wade …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/21 03:16 AM
36

I roll my eyes so far back in my head that it manages to swipe left on their profile when I see that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 11:15 PM
19

They probably think that they can be like the women who advertise their OF accounts on OLD to get more followers. "If it works for women, surely this will work for me." It's good though that they list it on their profile because they're basically telling you that they'll be too busy on their computers to ever invest in the relationship properly. Yet again, another example of them telling on themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 11:13 PM
66

Have some social support when you watch it or after you watch it. It's fucking bleak AF. Hits a little too close to home you know what I mean?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 10:43 PM
24

Can you tell us more about the Haven coalition? I'm not familiar with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 10:41 PM
7

I'm not familiar with the site. What makes it toxic? (Other than having men on it apparently?)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 04:27 AM
45

You still deserve proper bc. American insurance system is like the LVM of first world nations' healthcare systems.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 03:16 AM
95

You missed the part where he still does this 56 years later! I'm reading this like he's still looking at 11 y/o even though he's 67. Dear God. I hope that man had 0 access to children and young women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 02:38 AM
9

Same! There was another video by GGGamer that was discussing p0rn use in society. He seems to think that we are on the cusp of VR / waifu era where humans eschew relationships with one another in favor of sex dolls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/21 07:30 AM
35

That sounds like my aunt and uncle. He's also misogynistic and is constantly telling her to shut up or stop talking. It's abysmal. She's so sweet and he's so mean to her. Her "joke" is that since he's nicer to his subordinates than he is to her then she should have gone to work for him instead of marrying him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/21 05:47 AM
28

That was my last relationship! Although I suspect that he was using avoidant attachment as a code for being one of these: sociopathic, only capable of cognitive empathy, psychopathic. Fun times! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/21 04:47 AM
28

I had a friend who recently went through and initiated a divorce. The reason her ex waited so long? Bc he couldn't be bothered to figure out how to file the paperwork properly and was too broke to go through a lawyer. She had to figure out everything herself and tell him what to do. My favorite part is that they went through mediation. My friend had been supporting him trying to "find himself" and several career changes. (spoiler alert: the jobs where he was required to work were the ones where …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 08:08 PM
106

The FDS approach seems easier than a Masterclass! Block and delete at the first sign of trouble. Seems like this Barb the Builder lucked out with her approach. Her bf seemed to actually experience shame. My impression is that most men are incapable of feeling shame about the most basic of experiences or situations.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 07:42 PM
202

That reminds of the AITA post where someone in the comments was the epitome of malicious compliance. Her bf "accidentally" bleached her black dress. Rather than get angry, she was so supportive of him that she wore the dress to a family function. When people made comments about the bleach spots, she acknowledged that she knew about it but loved how it turned out when her bf did the laundry. She also made a casserole. Asked the bf to put it in the fridge when it was cool. BF did not do as request…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 07:25 PM
26

It's no wonder that women are out achieving men as each generation of women removes their financial and domestic handcuffs. Literally these men cannot even listen to someone discussing negative health impacts of p0rn addiction/use without turning it into something sexual. 🙄 These LVM can't even focus on something that is negatively impacting their health! You would think they would care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 05:59 PM
333

Spoiler alert: He is!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 04:45 AM
44

It made me sad to hear. Yet, foror those who might doubt the stance of FDS on porn (I'm looking at you scrotes), this is a great resource discussing some of the research on P0rn's negative effects. Addiction is terrible. P0rn seems to be the only substance that is readily available and on demand -- at least alcohol requires you to be a certain age before consumption. There's no age enforcement for viewing. Yet it has far reaching societal impacts that not enough people are talking about. We need…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 02:31 AM
54

The only triangles I'm interested in are isosceles, acute, and equilateral. Ain't nobody got time for triangulation against other women. Glad you blocked him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 07:22 AM
35

If you've been talking to him and he still hasn't planned a date especially with all the Halloween activities.... stop wasting your own time. It's time to ghost. Couldn't resist. You're right though. Is the guy you're talking to starting to resemble Dracula because he sucks so much? Block and delete. We aren't here for their entertainment on demand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 07:16 AM
56

That's so funny because in The Ethical Slut they portrayed children growing up in a polyamorous household as the modern-day loving supportive village necessary to raise a child. More proof that it's propaganda and not actually steeped in any kind of truth. That book always struck me as people copping out on their relationships and not doing the work required to stay in love/cherish their partner. The authors even suggest just giving the book to your partner that you want to open up your relation…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 07:08 AM
442

How dare that strange man give you a compliment when your date is trying to bomb your self-esteem by dictating when you get told that you're beautiful. Your date was working so hard to seduce sabotage you and this guy ruined everything. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 02:03 AM
25

This was before FDS existed so if anything I would have been like "that's great but how?" It's why I really appreciate what FDS teaches us. Literally generations of pickmeishas in my family who have been used and abused by LVM and NVM men. How are you supposed to be a HVW when you've never had it modeled for you? Years of therapy and FDS has helped. I'm still not what I would consider HV, but I'm getting there. Progress/improvement is never a straight line. I'm getting better at blocking and del…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 01:00 AM
20

He immediately tried to gaslight me saying ''those are just wants, not needs''. I'm sure they would be wants until he needed something more to get and keep an erection during sex. I'm glad you walked away. I have a feeling if you had stayed he would have been trying to wear down your sexual boundaries throughout the relationshit. Good for you! I hope you are relishing your progress.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 11:22 PM
9

I'm sure the men were meant to feel some sort of shame by confessing, but in reality they probably saw it as bragging about their conquests.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 11:13 PM
50

I recently reconnected with a friend who told me that she essentially dropped away because of my pickmeisha behaviors when we were younger (she doesn't know FDS, but that's essentially what she was saying). I wish she had been kind enough to tell me the truth that I so badly needed to hear. I'm grateful to FDS for highlighting the importance that it's okay to be kind, sensitive, and empathetic but only to people who value and deserve it. I wasn't valuing myself and it meant I was susceptible to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 08:27 PM
59

They think they're spreading their pheromones to attract more women. Meanwhile, over here in reality, women are having an easier time discerning where the trash is located.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 07:08 PM
71

My grandmother needed male "sponsorship" for her financial accounts. Now I'm her sponsor since she waited too long to teach herself the best practices for her financial health. Her personal saying was essentially, "learn to do it yourself or earn enough to pay someone to do it for you." FDS is essentially teaching us what our elders wanted us to know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 06:45 AM
2

Appropriate username. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 05:01 PM
96

I made the mistake of getting caught up at a friend's wedding. I should have read the handbook beforehand to remind myself what to look out for. Instead I got future faked and triangulated. Ugh. My solace is I cut everything off once I realized what happened. Drinking never helps at these things. Follow. The. Handbook. It would have saved me a waste of a beautiful evening by not spending time with a man who only wanted an ego boost of sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 06:04 PM
7

Probably laughing with her!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 05:25 AM
9

Maybe when he's done writing all those checks? 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 01:56 AM
88

Absolutely! Is this what a reverse mortgage looks like? She lives rent free in his mind while he pays her?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 10:50 PM
38

I can see the status updates now: Hanging out at our "spot" making better memories! Cheers to true love! I love you forever! (He never found new places to take wife #2 so they frequent the same establishments that he and wife #1 went to) So happy I found him! Can't believe such a great man could be tossed away like that.. my blessings though! #godsgift
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 10:49 PM
65

Absolutely! The kind of energy that goes into holding space for this kind of resentment must feel like an additional person in the relationship!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 10:25 PM
65

“ruined themselves with colored hair and tattoos” Sounds like some BS pill shit. Glad you got away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 09:10 PM
232

Facts. How could you not see how his current behavior towards his ex is an indication of how he would treat you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 09:05 PM
9

I haven't listened to this episode so I wasn't sure if my previous questions had been addressed in the podcast. Thank you for your response!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 10:37 PM
116

How can you be conservative AND be pro-abortion when American conservatives are very much anti-abortion? How does that work exactly when it comes time to vote?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 10:19 PM
7

You'd think the subreddit title would explain it well enough for folks. Even with the thesis statement I'm sure there would be another complaint that would pop up in its place. The good ol' whack a mole of misogyny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 08:18 AM
45

I have run into guys like this on OLD and IRL. I have to say their honesty is refreshing. While NSA sex isn't for me, I appreciate that these guys aren't trying to be manipulative about their intentions. I wish more men were honest. Although tbf the default thinking should be that all men only want NSA sex, let them prove they want to be a HVM in a relationship with you. Someone on here shared a quote that was like, all men are nice to you until they sleep with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 08:04 AM
7

How were his teeth? In pretty good shape? Jk I am watching What We Do in the Shadows (series) and love that they have an energy vampire on the show. That guy probably thought he was cosplaying as the sexy Anne Rice type of vampire when in reality he was an energy vampire. Glad you escaped that dingbat!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:44 AM
23

Seriously! You aren't a therapist. It's like when people are posting for relationship advice... If you have to ask other people or resources for what's wrong, that's your answer -- now leave. That guy sounds awful. Was he so charming that people forgave his trespasses or did he just move on to other social circles?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:37 AM
235

3. 3. Change locks and kick out husband.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:23 AM
19

Did..did he miss the meeting entirely and try to make up for it by spouting off at you? My God.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 07:56 PM
6

Thank for your response. I'm just shocked bc this organization has such a thorough vetting/hiring process. I'm surprised he was able to make it through... Luckily we're completely virtual right now so I can keep my camera off to minimize his ability to see how his haranguing me is throwing me off. He can't see my body language and I can be silent/grey rock as much as possible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 06:27 PM
14

I'm done with all the ince$t/sexualized comments as well for even non-NSFW subs. I don't want my entire user experience to be sexualized, and more often than not it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 12:26 PM
27

How do you manage this when it's a man at work? I'm being targeted by an older man at my work and I'm not sure how to respond in the moment. For example, he was asking if I'm a miss, Ms., Or Mrs. Like WTF does that have to do with my job or my skills. It sucks because I'm an intern so there's a power differential in play. Luckily he's not my manager. I'm "on loan" for a side project that was presented as a collaboration opportunity by our department head and has turned into me doing all/majority…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 11:37 AM
22

What did you talk about during that time you were driving? Any green flags or red flags there? Glad you had some help! Moving by yourself is rough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 09:45 AM
2

Yes! It's tons of fun!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 09:31 PM
2

What are you trying to send to Europe that you can only get in the states? Skin care? Food? Clothes? It sounds like the $600 was from shipping costs?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 09:30 PM
3

Green flag Friday?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 07:40 AM
27

Tell me you're a psychopath without saying you're a psychopath.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 04:37 PM
13

I don't think we're supposed to be directly linking to other subreddits or else it looks like FDS is trying to brigade other subs. You should probably share direct links via chat instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 04:32 PM
130

Men in the background screaming: see?! Golddiggers man! They're everywhere. Be careful out there kings! This is proof women just want our money. None of them understanding that this is meant to reflect on their sexual depravity and unconscionable behavior towards drunk women and women in general.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 06:16 PM
3

I think it's important to believe these things you mentioned and internalize these things as part of our having standards. One reservation I have with your premise is that it forces the blame on us if we aren't able to manifest a HVM because we "didn't believe enough" or "didn't truly change our thoughts." We see consistently on this thread that there are societal, political, technological, and sexual trends (etc.) that have interacted in such a way as to bring about the influx of LVM. Manifesta…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 09:17 PM
8

Your friend group becomes your and your child's family! Some of my friends are having kids and we're now becoming the aunties. It's great!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 07:57 PM
117

I think someone forgot to add the /s on their post. Although the bar is so low, this could almost be a not the onion comment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 07:52 PM
44

I point it out all of the time like at a festival or something nearly every woman is gorgeous or at the very least well put together and thoughtful in their appearance and then there’s just like a sea of men just existing around them. OMG! So much this. Men basically walk around with cargo shorts and their shirt off when women put time and care into curating gorgeous looks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 07:39 PM
17

"But but but Belle accepted the Beast just as he was and her love transformed him into a handsome lad! I just need a woman who isn't a superficial bitch and doesn't let me pay for anything so I know she isn't a gold digger... Oh! And she better be ready to build me up so I can reach my full King potential by peeling back the layers of dirt and fat from my body to reveal my inner Chad." --- Scrotes probably.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 06:07 PM
2

I'm not familiar with the military wives culture so I appreciate your explanation and clarification regarding the use of dependa. Culture is nuanced and appropriation of certain terms without understanding the context of their use can be harmful. I only know about that subreddit because Reddit has been throwing random subs at me. I got sucked in one day watching videos. Thank you again for the explanation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 05:12 PM
6

FDS bingo?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 07:32 AM
28

How else will she keep it warm and ready for him to use for his Post-Work jerk sesh?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 06:33 AM
15

The dependa subreddit is full of stuff like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 06:31 AM
2

The dog doesn't deserve that though! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 05:50 PM
51

Yikes! More red flags to watch out for! Thank you for sharing. Are there any experienced therapists who specialize in NPD that can detail the differences between the different types of narcissism and how they play out for women dating these types of narcissistic men?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 05:47 AM
7

"That's too hard! I'm being discriminated against! "/Scrote
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 05:31 AM
9

'I mean sCrotE sCiEnCe FinDs a Way..." --- Jeff Goldblum, probably
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 05:30 AM
4

I think LOA is about telling people to become.more aware of opportunities related to the thing they're trying to manifest. Most people don't understand how to look at a situation objectively to understand where they can obtain opportunities that help them towards their dreams. It's like giving someone a cue to pay attention to their goals so that they can more readily.obtain their goals when conversing with other people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 05:03 AM
70

She PaID fOr tHe SoFT DrInK
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 04:41 AM
-3

I don't know why you're being downvoted. I believe this is essentially an act of allyship by using their platform to advocate for others who do not have an equivalent platform.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 04:07 AM
9

There are so many videos of cops planting "evidence" that I can understand why you wouldn't want to introduce an unknown variable into an already chaotic situation in addition to the other reasons you have listed. Thank you for sharing your perspective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 04:00 AM
18

I see your comments consistently on this sub and I want to thank you for sharing your lived experience. For someone who does not have any experience with any Indigenous communities, I appreciate the emotional work and energy you're expending when you share your experiences. I'm so sorry you have not been given the care and consideration you deserve. Thank you for sharing and I hope you know you are helping build an ally community with your efforts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 03:53 AM
14

I think an additional piece to the problem is that the people who are paying for journalism subscriptions are most likely white middle class or people with expendable incomes. Working class most likely would not subscribe to news sources if their ability to pay other bills or save for other more important financial goals is impacted. Given that WOC make considerably less than white women, this would probably also impact their willingness to pay for news subscriptions. Papers need to make money s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 03:49 AM
45

I like your original comment. Your description of intimacy sounds quite lovely and something to aspire to. There's definitely something to be said about waiting and getting to know someone before acting on physical desires. I think you did a lovely job of describing why you should wait. It's too easy to objectify someone when you don't know them and haven't gotten to a point where you care for the person yet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 01:39 AM
77

So. Original. 🙄 It's not like we haven't seen this before.. like cave paintings of naked women from early millennia. Same shit. Different medium.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 01:29 AM
4

It has been over 7 years now. I don't know if there's a time limit to report for my state.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 05:45 AM
30

Probably because you can manipulate the endorphins from working out by pairing them to yourself. It's like an extra boost of fake intimacy/limerance/feel good neurotransmitters that become associated with that person. It also distracts the woman from being able to be aware of any red flags depending on the workouts you're doing. They're great for manipulators. Terrible for women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 09:40 PM
77

Yeah, I had a male therapist once. Never again. He asked me specific details about how I was subject to SA by my cousin and wanted me to explain exactly what happened. 1 - this goes against every single best practice for SA survivors because it causes you to relive your trauma. 2 - the level of detail he wanted was completely inappropriate and creepy. Almost like he wanted to go home and jerk off to it. It was disgusting. I do not recommend male therapists.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 07:23 PM
7

For anyone struggling to quit smoking, Zyban was a complete game changer for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 06:25 PM
3

Aww thank you! This is so kind of you to say. I really like using watercolors (I love watching the colors spread across the wet page) and then I use colored markers/jelly pens to write on top once the page has dried.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 04:54 PM
11

Absolutely! It's why you block and delete at the first sign of trouble. No need to let their behavior get any worse! Ain't nobody got time for that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 04:21 PM
26

It definitely shouldn't replace reading the handbook, but as a visual person these kinds of images really help me summarize what I need to know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 07:21 AM
24

I have an art journal where I draw out these things that I want in my life. While I fill in colors for the shapes/images, I meditate on the phrase/quote, traits, or green flags that I'm trying to manifest. It helps me to read through it when I need a reminder of why I won't settle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 05:47 AM
70

Block and delete hits back harder though. Sending you love and light with the hope that those flags and the man attached to them are well behind you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 05:31 AM
233

When the quality of your day hinges on how well his day went
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 05:30 AM
13

Or what would happen if they had brought a woman police officer to the scene instead? Would she have felt safe enough to detail the abuse going on within their relationship?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 05:21 AM
26

Found this on Instagram from BoxlessDesigns. Thought it might be a nice reminder for our community on common red flags we need to be wary of!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 04:56 AM
24

Yikes 😬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 01:15 AM
599

I would love to see this same person's comment/message history speaking up about not using misogynistic terms like cnt, bitch etc because he has a daughter and doesn't want people to call her those things. Or lemme guess.. it's just for his son that he feels he needs to interfere? Is having a daughter supposed to give him credibility points?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 07:14 PM
175

This is a two for one special with FDS strategy. Not drinking on dinner dates protects you from the potential disgusting and dangerous Scrote date-rape tactics while also seeing how they handle you putting up a boundary. Putting up the smallest boundary and seeing if they respect it is telling. If they get angry or try to knock down your boundary, then that's your 🚩. No cocktail dates. Period. It's not worth it bc they've basically told you they want to drug you with alcohol 🚩 and take advantage…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 06:01 PM
48

“just being playful” bullshit. Translation: "It'S JuSt A jOKe" 2.0
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 05:40 PM
1

Google helps with this by telling you which days and times are busy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 04:10 AM
5

FDS working irl ☝️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 04:05 AM
168

Ugh that or "you must be single." 🙄 Like what does my relationship status have to do with the logic I just laid out dismantling your argument? Would my having a boyfriend or husband somehow change the veracity of my statements? Or make it easier to accept what I've said? It's ridiculous. The only reason I can see for engaging is to show women (maybe men?) who lurk on Reddit that we don't have to accept misogyny, the patriarchy, and shitty LVM/NVM treatment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 03:29 AM
17

I love the red flag posts from women on here because they help me calibrate my boundaries better. Thank you for a great post!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 07:00 AM
4

Any time I run errands, I try to experience something/someplace new that I have saved on Google Maps nearby my errand location. It makes running errands less tedious and I have something to look forward to when I have to "adult." Music/concerts/ballet/art shows and also fancy dinners are on my regular roster.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 06:36 AM
6

Ahhh I can't agree more with you about traveling alone. I've got a big group of friends going on a trip coming up in a few months. Unfortunately, one couple likes to fight any time either of them drinks anything alcoholic. Their fights are loud, long-lasting, and overly dramatic. I'm hoping they break up before the trip. Otherwise I plan on staying in a separate room away from everyone to escape the drama.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 06:21 AM
4

Asking about certain components in the dishes you're tasting can be another way to connect with staff while also learning more about the food you're eating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 06:12 AM
8

My grandmother is having to face the fact that my grandfather's health is deteriorating. He dealt with all the finances during their marriage. Now that he is slowly succumbing to dementia, she is starting to realize that she has to take over everything. I'm trying to help, but I cannot stress enough how important this post is for women. Being able to make healthy fiscal decisions is integral to a happy life. Trying to learn these skills and/or new technologies when you're older is difficult at b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 05:47 AM
34

That feeling of relief is so powerful! Seeing and knowing the patterns of red flags and then cutting men off when you see the beginning of those red flags is so powerful! Instead of spending months or years in mental, emotional, or even physical turmoil, you cut them off by blocking and deleting while congratulating yourself on escaping the next Scrote. There is no longer any agony about what your future would hold with them. Instead of wondering "what would have happened if I had JuST cOMMuNiCa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 08:19 PM
64

“I have a son and he’s my world so don’t even think about trying to change that” <—— Yes I expect your child to be your priority and I would never try and change that so this is completely unnecessary. Their child is their world but only sees them every other Sunday...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 08:51 PM
25

Don't forget the kitten fishing where they use photos of themselves when they were younger and in better shape!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 08:45 PM
38

Felt cute while stuck in traffic might delete later! Teeeheee.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 08:40 PM
94

Literally was on a date where he was showing me a song on Spotify on his phone when his gf messaged him asking him what time he was coming home. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Blocked and deleted. The audacity knows no bounds.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 08:33 PM
144

This made me tear up a bit. This is the kind of partnership I am looking for in a relationship. Thank you for sharing your story so that others may know that these kinds of relationships are possible and exist. It's worth it to hold out for something better, something beautiful, and something meaningful. The scrotastic shit sandwiches they're attempting to force feed us to accept just ain't worth it when there's 5 star dining out here. Thank you for the hope you've added to my heart. I hope your…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 11:00 PM
112

Don't forget the extra time managing jealousy/drama across each of these relationships. Although I guess if they're lucky they'll have a partner who is really good at shoving their negative feelings down I'm sorry meant to say compersion..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 09:10 PM
5

Same. Stealthing is fucked up. I'm so sorry you went through that. The pain, anger, confusion, and shame I felt when I realized what this guy had done to me. Casual sex be damned. FDS is the way. 🙌
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 08:43 PM
8

More like their version of being tested is to wait for the woman to come back to him and tell him he gave her something and to get treated. I'm sure in their minds it's easy enough to rationalize away their dick burning when they piss.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 08:38 PM
14

Are there any nurses, doctors, or public health practitioners on our forum who could make some sexual health posts about a specific STI or STD that women are at risk for if they engage in casual sex? Possibly include pictures of what they look like if you are symptomatic? Like each week or day could be a specific post about a single STI and include treatment information etc. If there are pictures, we could tag NSFW just in case someone doesn't want to see it, but i definitely think it could be v…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 08:33 PM
18

In the pick up artist community, some coaches encourage their students to learn about maximizing female orgasms. These men use those feel good hormones /neurotransmitters women release from orgasms as a way to further reinforce and manipulate you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 08:26 PM
28

This should be another add to that epic male hypocrisy post that was posted on here a few days ago. Guys can't even be bothered to wash their dicks let alone get tested for STDs, etc but lose their minds at the thought of DiSGuSTiNG periods /period sex. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 08:16 PM
765

"Searching for our 🦄! Are you her?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 08:10 PM
23

"f*mcel terrorist forces man into slavery" 🙄 /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 01:25 AM
10

Not sure if anyone has heard about this, but there is also the concept of bro-sex/dudesex/heteroflexible Basically men may identify as heterosexual but still give or receive sex acts with other men to satisfy their urges.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 12:59 AM
49

Don't forget drug users who shoot up their drugs. Sharing needles/syringes puts you at risk for blood borne diseases.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 12:44 AM
9

Why can't you just leave? Put your 30 day notice in at the same time you move out ? Essentially, when. He's gone at work, you move everything out and leave a note saying you gave your 30 days, and the landlord was notified too. Get your deposit from the landlord, provide contact information for the next tenant to repay you, or be willing to write off your deposit? The love for yourself > any guilt or sense of commitment to this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 08:22 AM
14

Any time you feel like you have to rationalize something, put yourself down, or somehow feel "less than" yourself is a red flag. You should never feel less than for being a sexual and sensual being. It sounds like he's seeing your sexual desire + nice birthday gift as an "Aha! Got her!" Moment. Now he feels that he can align himself to the bare minimum of the usual scrote-tasticness we see on here while feeling self-assured that he's still got you hook, line, and sinker. You have nothing to be a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 08:15 AM
4

Ahh! A classic Schrodinger's Scrote in the wild! Hate to see it, but not surprised. I'm sorry for your friend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 07:59 AM
7

I wonder if "male depravity" posts can be tagged NSFW/NSFL and spare those who don't want to be subjected to the negativity?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 07:53 AM
10

Oh man.. I had a new friend date tonight and realized how much FDS helped me. This lady was going on and on and on about some NVM/LVM coworker scrote who she was hooking up with the past 3 years while I kept trying to tell her to forget about him and move on. She had story after story of him breadcrumbing her. I felt sad hearing her story, but I also felt relief knowing that FDS strategy protects us at the first sign of these red flags. I also felt relief that I don't invest this kind of mental …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 07:49 AM
9

I think that's a totally appropriate saying especially when guys from the past try to rekindle or reconnect with you. There was this phase in college where guys from high school who dated other girls during high school were single and trying to hit up the women the women they went to high school with who had major glow ups during college. Thanks for sharing this. I'm going to put this in my art/quotes journal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 07:08 AM
155

Bravo! Thank you for compiling the list of utterly misogynistic hypocrisy we are bombarded with. Can we have something about always interjecting with "not all men" when women are detailing experiences of trauma or assault they have faced at the hands of men even though the vast vast vast majority of assaulters for both men and women are..... You guessed it! MEN!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 06:22 AM
91

I saw a post on offmychest about a guy who stays up late on his phone while his girlfriend is sleeping. When his own baby cries to be fed, he turns off the phone and pretends to be asleep making his girlfriend get up to feed their baby. Someone commented about feeling sorry for his wife and most importantly his baby and why he would want to avoid an opportunity to connect with his child. Spoiler alert - the post was deleted within minutes of that comment. Their phones are more important than the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 07:16 PM
83

I am loving this success story. It warms my heart. Thank you for sharing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 07:10 PM
32

I take a some solace from the fact that places like exredpill exist. It may not be super active, but any movement has to start somewhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 06:23 PM
28

BUt bUt biOloGy! 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 06:02 PM
19

Lack of situational awareness = lack of empathy = block & delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 05:49 PM
16

Future faking the next event/date they want to take you on, but then they ghost you after the date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:12 AM
7

How has Hilary used her trauma? I'm not familiar so I'm interested in learning more about this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:09 AM
48

He was probably like: BuT mY sUgGesTiON wAs LoGiCaL. 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:02 AM
11

Mods please pin this or put it in the handbook! This post is 🔥🔥🔥🔥. Thank you OP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 09:16 AM
16

I have been rewatching New Girl and in the words of Winston: "emotional fluffer."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 06:01 AM
10

+1 for your level up! 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 04:17 AM
44

Sounds like she might be feeling entitled too since she went to the same elite university and didn't end up with a guy like your BF. I'm sorry she made such a rude comment to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 07:14 PM
45

When you leave for the bathroom and come back to the table, the date is "looking at their finances" on their phone, but the phone screen is easily viewable (laid flat out on the table rather than being held up privately). I dunno about you, but I'm not looking at my bank accounts out in public.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 07:09 PM
51

There goes his retirement...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 07:04 PM
30

You forgot half rotten ➡️ half-limp 🍤. God knows what disease crusted contagion (s) they have stored inside their penis. I sure as hell don't want to find out. ❌
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 06:48 PM
8

Or you see people splitting hairs between ephebophilia and pedophilia.... Either way there's an unhealthy power dynamic and unhealthy obsession with youth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 06:13 PM
12

I don't understand that point. It's pretty clear to me that FDS encourages a pretty narrow age range for dating. Like most women here aren't dating outside of their decade (30s/40s/etc are focusing on other 30-39/40-49/etc year olds give or take on your specific age, 20s seem to be even narrower).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 05:51 PM
34

It's not allowed to link to other posts because FDS could be accused of brigading. Maybe the OP can message you or try searching for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 05:23 PM
11

If not, I would strongly suggest you reach out to Zendo and ask them to participate at that festival. Sometimes production groups know there's a need but they don't know where to go. If you can notify them both, that would increase the likelihood of seeing Zendo there. (Or a group somewhat similar to Zendo)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 05:13 PM
5

I absolutely agree with this post. The one thing that I see useful about OLD is that it helps me master boundaries and keeping up with red flags. PRE-FDS I was always trying to keep up conversations and entertain like the pickme that I was. Now I'm practicing not over investing and allowing conversations to fade because the man isn't investing in the conversation. I know at some point I'll probably get tired of dumpster diving, but right now it's helping me assimilate what I'm learning on FDS. H…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 07:25 PM
27

Someone made a graph on data is beautiful about Leo's increasing age and the age of his partners which makes it very easy to see that Leo has an obvious age cut-off with partners.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 07:18 PM
151

If this ever happens again or for people who need to hear this: Look for Zendo at your festivals. They're a psychedelic harm reduction group that attends most festivals. They offer a safe space and trip sitters for people experiencing bad trips. Often times psychedelics can bring out things that people need to process with the help of a guide (in tribal communities you would have a shaman to guide you).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 07:04 PM
39

Absolutely! The guy is thinking: Let me pretend to be a nice guy who wants to make sure you're safe and not driving drunk, but will absolutely take advantage of you once you're inebriated and isolated at my apartment. Usually this is from a "platonic" male friend so you're not prepared for their sexual assault when it happens while you sleep and/or blacked out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 09:54 AM
28

Oh my God. I hope his daughter is safe and was never actually harmed by him. I just can't. What a sick fucking man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 09:07 AM
32

No. Just no? This is a joke right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 08:43 AM
98

Or "I'm going to encourage you to get too drunk once you're at my apartment where you'll feel like you have to rely on my prior invitation to stay at my apartment but then I'll try to take advantage of you when you're too incapacitated to fend me off."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 08:41 AM
5

Two questions: 1. Is there ever an appropriate situation where a man can discuss his ex while on a date? 2. Does anyone allow men to touch them on the first date? I have noticed men escalating physical touch (increasing kino) while on a first date. What's a classy/funny response when guys try to escalate touching and you aren't into it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 07:51 AM
6

Absolutely! My favorite is the dumb fox from the handbook. Just smile and nod, "I see. That must have been hard," while mentally counting the red flags as he continues to dig the hole deeper and deeper. I'm grateful when it happens because I'm not wasting any more time investing in the person like I would have in my pickmeisha past. If anything, it tells me I didn't do a good enough job vetting. That post about red flags = deal breakers was fire. I'm so grateful we have such a supportive communi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 07:44 AM
7

I had a first date today where he shared his depression and anxiety diagnosis, self-medication with weed, and his ex gf who abused ecstasy every week who has extreme mood swings and took it out on him. 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 03:36 AM
26

Apparently there is a Korean word for emotional intelligence or anticipation that I found out about: "Nunchi, sometimes noonchi, is a Korean concept signifying the subtle art and ability to listen and gauge others' moods." Are there any Korean native speakers who could elaborate or clarify? It seems like this could be somewhat similar to what you're talking about Op. Like it isn't mind reading if he can read your body language and know you well enough to see if you're upset or having a bad day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 06:14 AM
4

That's what I was thinking! Like he's definitely not washing his sheets everyday after his booger picking spree. What the hell do his sheets look like?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 01:23 AM
44

I'm sure it was one of those bundled product offers where they literally bundle the extra product they want you to try to the product you're originally trying to purchase. The guy probably doesn't even use it, but he was too lazy to throw it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:28 AM
16

"he's the perfect husband except he never takes care of the kids and cheats on me with the babysitter. What should I do?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:02 AM
147

We should add nails done, hair done, and waxing/shaving/hair removal! Although it might end up being a two page meme once you incorporate all the images of date requirements for women. 😆 Nice job though calling out how much effort we put into looking nice for a "simple date night." It's only simple if you're a guy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:59 AM
8

I also think those women remind them of the shitty times they were going through. It's like once these a$$hats level up, they don't want any reminders of the hard times so they throw out their loyal girlfriends too. They want a fresh new woman/arm piece who symbolizes their level up in life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:51 AM
7

Also real life "Tinderella" stories about women hooking up with guys on Tinder who ultimately end up marrying the guy don't help. It reinforces that soulmate or hook-up roulette.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 05:58 AM
2

Op - post discusses being forced and unwilling participant to sexual acts her partner wants and is feeling overwhelmed by his constant hounding for a threesome. Male commenter - WoW yOu'RE so WiLLiNG! WIsH I hAD a GiRLfRIeND LiKE yOu tHaT I cOULd bULLy InTo AsK To pERFoRm sExUAL aCTS LiKe ThIs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 05:53 PM
5

If you're feeling like you're ever in crisis or need someone to talk to outside of your therapist - check out RTS - they have a 24 hr crisis hotline, toll-free. The people on the phone are trained peer-to-peer crisis counselors. (650) 692- (7273) is the toll free number in case anyone is triggered by this post and needs some support. Sending you hugs. Keep advocating and fighting if you are able to. Take breaks when you need to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 04:45 PM
43

Ah yes. The classic deflection of blaming the woman/victim versus placing the onus on the male offender. Very cool. Very legit. Nothing to see here folks. Just more classic mainstream misogyny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 07:49 PM
25

I enjoy making my own from scratch! Ice cream makers can be pretty inexpensive/free (if you get one through a Buy Nothing community for example). You can experiment with your own combinations of non dairy milks/yogurts and add in your own toppings or flavors.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 06:12 AM
37

You should read a book called The Power by Naomi Alderman!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 06:01 AM
92

Probably why the world is going to hell in a hand basket....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 05:57 AM
9

She's probably lonely and needing to level up/get comfortable with being alone. Maybe that's her way of hoping that you don't have the same fate as her. Which you won't because you found FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 08:08 PM
9

What a fascinating question! You remind me of Watzoo- she always has the best conversation starters! Have you two met? 😉 Am I doing it right? Haha.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 08:02 PM
1

I wonder if this will eventually spawn more male plastic surgery to further manipulate women?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 04:48 PM
60

I think it's supposed to be high intensity interval training (HIIT)? Definitely supposed to last longer than 10 minutes. Probably an indication of how long he lasts in bed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 01:09 AM
15

😂😂 That should be their follow-up study.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 07:12 PM
11

It's a general trend they've described. From a research perspective, you shouldn't assume that an individual with these traits is automatically going to have these preferences, but it's more likely than not. Therefore, you need to vet more and be prepared to leave if you see additional red flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 04:35 PM
87

People are complaining about money loss and aren't even trying to get creative about protecting children from seeing porn. This is repugnant. Instead of fighting the issue, these companies could be working together which could mean lower costs for verification and ensuring children's mental health is (somewhat) preserved for a few more years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 04:53 AM
18

Yet another flag to add to the list...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 02:43 AM
122

Essentially the men answered a survey indicating what they were looking for: hookups or naw. Women guessed their preferences based off of the photo alone. So the women were essentially confirming what the men had indicated separately in the survey purely off of their photos! Isn't that wild? This is ever more reason to trust your instincts ladies!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 11:02 PM
249

TLDR for the article: "Heightened sociosexuality (aka hook-ups) in men was associated with longer faces, higher foreheads, longer noses, and larger eyes." Edit to note (from a deleted comment) - their sample was all Caucasian males.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 10:38 PM
9

It's not available in my country. Can you explain what the video is about? It's titled "what took you so long" by Emma Bunton so I can imagine it has to do with this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 06:13 AM
75

Have you actually seen his daughter or is she a figment of his imagination?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 05:30 AM
7

I think it's unfair to assume that women have equal access to birth control and abortions. For example, women with certain types of metal allergies can't use Paraguard IUDs or their anatomy rejects the IUDs. Their physician can implant the device incorrectly which means the birth control isn't effective. States have different abortion laws which means a woman may not be able to have an abortion once they realize they're pregnant. Different insurance plans cover different types of birth control o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 01:03 AM
6

Red pillers and PUA: "simp!" Then they spend hours on the internet talking about how they just need more dread game and to hold their frame better to get results on dead bedroom. Gee I don't understand why it isn't working? /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 09:13 PM
14

Hats for every picture on their dating profiles except the last one with their bald head showing. 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 09:07 PM
15

Ah yes. My "Southern gentleman" literally told me that he was only capable of cognitive empathy, Aka psychopath. And I still stayed bc "he's got all the things I've been looking for except for the manipulation and abuse, but it's okay bc I'm developing a thicker skin and it's a neurological disorder that he's working on!" 🤡🤦‍♀️ Thank you FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 08:42 PM
9

Were you the older sibling? I wonder if that was part of it. Plus your parents might have been exhausted from having multiple kids so they relied on you to be the babysitter essentially rather than encouraging your brother to be self-sufficient.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 08:35 PM
3

Rant - family is using the pool in my apartment complex and the "Dad" (I'm assuming?) keeps referring to his daughter as "Momma" everytime he speaks to her. Like this little girl hasn't even had to go through puberty and she's being reduced to her reproductive abilities rather than her name. WTF? Like why even bother giving her a name at that point?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 12:46 AM
18

I have a picture near my doorway that is about following your intuition (from the artist's description of her inspiration for the piece). It's my reminder everyday I see it to follow my intuition. I'm a visual person so having these kinds of reminders helps me reaffirm and internalize important messages. Thank you for the post OP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 05:21 AM
27

Congratulations on ending it when you did. You are now a year away from a situationship that was not serving your needs that deserved to be met (at the bare minimum!). Think of all things you've accomplished without him in your life! You're leveling up. I'm so proud of you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 05:16 AM
25

I think you forgot to mention the mastiffs as well judging by your username. 😉 Joking aside, I absolutely agree. There's a power in knowing that you aren't at the whim of other people's interests/availability if you're keen to do something. You can go by yourself and know you'll be 100% happy with the activity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 05:02 AM
17

Absolutely. That's why the 10 is in parentheses. 😊 That's why I love FDS because we share the latest and "greatest" field tactics fads being used by these manipulative men to prevent women from being bamboozled by them. I wish I had known about FDS in my 20s. I wouldn't have put up with all of the utter nonsense that I did. HVW know they deserve better and leave at the first 🚩.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 04:55 AM
54

Honestly it may not even be boredom. Usually you're viewed as "practice" so they can bag their ideal "10." They see women as objects that they can use for their own devices. In this case, you're just a step in their PUA skill development. Edit: most guys are essentially manipulating the situation to push boundaries. They push people/women so the men can become desensitized to anger and convince themselves: "eh it's not that bad to be yelled at. Now I can practice dread game and hold my frame bec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 09:28 PM
13

Hello from LA! I would love some specialized tips /pointers for navigating the dating scene here in LA. The PUA scene here is huge. I was in a long-term situationship (pre-FDS) with a coach who was based in San Diego, and apparently they host PUA conventions here in LA. 🤢🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 09:23 PM
27

If you need any anonymous support, there's an organization called RTS that operates a 24 hour crisis hotline for people who have experienced sexual assault. The number is (650) 692- (7273). There will be a trained counselor on the line. I hope this helps!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 12:43 AM
30

I'm sorry for your experiences with her. Are you feeling triggered? Do you have a support system?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 12:34 AM
2

I had a similar situation as you! Not only were heels not enough but my posture was too straight for him. He encouraged me to slouch so that I would look the same height as him even though slouching is TERRIBLE for you! Literally this guy wanted me to injure myself for his insecurities. 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 08:10 PM
29

To me, work usually indicates that there are protections in place for laborers. This is anything but the case for people who are using sex as a means for income. Very rarely are they afforded any kind of legal protections in the way that workers in other industries are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 07:19 PM
43

Some more: Conversations with him are platforms for mansplaining to you and always start with, "well AcKuALLy.." Tries to claim "not all Men" when he is a perpetrator of sexual assault and domestic violence
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 04:57 PM
16

I'm sorry! I hope you're 🤡 free now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 03:48 PM
136

This is like further proof of how bad porn degeneracy is. According to them, anal can only be sadistic and misogynistic. How dare women enjoy sex!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 06:46 AM
158

They left out the part where she tried to CoMmUnICaTE multiple times about issues that were important to her only to have her needs ignored. She unemotionally dumped him because she was done trying to make the relationship work. As usual, scrotes only pay attention to the break-up because they lose their 3D Fleshlight bangmaid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 06:43 AM
5

Has anyone read this post on Medium titled: “Pick Me Girl” — The New Term Being Used to Shame Women It’s not OK, and we need to stop it? I can't read the article (paywall), but it seems relevant to this subreddit since it seems like it is alluding to us. medium article
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 07:18 PM
19

That looks and sounds lovely! Hope you had a wonderful evening.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 08:42 AM
7

So did she and Elisha Cuthbert have some drama then IRL? I'm assuming that's who she was referring to when Iliza mentions something like the cute neighbor in the movie vs "The girl next door" movie. One of my favorite quotes: " great copy paste from Reddit."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 06:48 AM
5

It's networking for their pp.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 09:07 AM
5

I appreciate hearing how supportive you are with women in your sphere of influence! Good luck with the renovation and website! Hope things go smoothly and stay on schedule for you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 09:02 AM
3

Drinking water right after I drink alcohol has helped me. One glass of wine followed by a glass of water or have both glasses and sip back and forth. Eating food as well helps (before and/or during). Honestly it's such a slippery slope I can empathize with you. Best wishes to you on your journey. I'm on a post-covid, lose the lockdown weight game plan. Trying to trim after stress eating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 08:52 AM
2

Are you referring to Shadow and Bone? I loved the series. I'm not sure if it's FDS approved, but I did like that she (the female protagonist, I forget her name) was strong enough to persist in her beliefs to follow her morals/values in spite of LVM sabotage. In some ways, I think the female main character is an apt example of naive young women being manipulated by "nice" older men which can serve as a reminder to viewers (similar to old school fairy tales which served as warnings as well).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 07:18 AM
10

I feel myself going through cycles of wanting to give up completely versus going back and hoping for a better outcome ( is this insanity?). This post is a helpful reminder that I have to actually practice the strategies laid out for us in this sub in order to know if I've changed my pickme behaviors. Thank you for the reminder. Your post and Jammies post is like a kick in the butt to pull myself out of this defeatist attitude. It might be tempting to stew in self-defeat, but then what am I doing…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 06:50 AM
19

I wonder if we could do a reading club of the handbook? I would be interested in reading about other women's perspectives, additional updates, or tips. One day a week could be dedicated to one post in the handbook?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 05:19 AM
67

Thank you for the inspo! I love hearing about success stories. Congratulations. I hope he continues to bring high value to your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 03:27 AM
21

My grandparents were my primary caregivers because of my Mom's work schedule and my father's inability to actually coparent as a single Dad. I don't think I could have gotten pregnant in my early 20s like she did. Even with public assistance programs, I wouldn't have had any ability to pay for childcare. My family members would be too old and/or overworked at that point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 03:14 AM
13

My take is it stems from the sentiment of: "it's just a cartoon.. it's not hurting anyone!" But that sentiment doesn't address the fact that IRL role play is most likely going on with lolicon fans since IRL role play also happens with other types of sex play.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 01:47 AM
33

Is it just me or is he possibly cheating on her? Having unprotected sex with multiple partners is another way to continually have infections since the male partner is essentially taking "foreign" bacteria/yeasts from one partner and transplanting it into another partner. This is further exacerbated if you're constantly taking antibiotics because the antibiotics decimate your normal levels of natural bacteria and cause imbalances with the yeast colonies. The bacteria and yeast ecosystem are suppo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 12:07 AM
11

Same. Me in Pickmeisha days / rationale: BuT hE hAs NeEdS tHaT mUsT bE fULfiLLeD.🙁🤡 Spoiler alert: they did not share the same mentality to my needs (sexual or otherwise).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:14 AM
38

My impression of poly after reading The Ethical Slut was that people used poly/open relationships to run away from the hard work of a monogamous relationship when it gets boring or needs work to spice things up or to use it as a way to run away from facing issues going on in the primary relationship. I had poly roommates at one point and it seemed miserable. They were always fighting or having passive aggressive interactions if they were jealous about a shiny new partner that their primary was e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 10:22 PM
1

TBH that therapist was male so maybe that's why?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 03:26 PM
7

Exactly!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 03:23 PM
56

Ugh. I want to 🤢 when I see the obligatory peddit comments splitting hairs and rationalizing their depraved choices: iT's ePheBOphiLIA noT pedOpHiLia. 🙄🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 07:26 AM
30

The fact that hardcore and mainstream are being used together in a sentence makes my heart hurt. Those two words shouldn't coexist in a sentence. 🤢I wish men's porn would stop warping innocent children's minds.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 05:45 AM
7

Followed by block and delete. Because 🤡 free is the way to be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 06:26 PM
62

WoW, I'm sO fLatTerED! OF aLL tHe nAKeD wOmEn yOu cHosE mE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 05:43 AM
3

Lactose is a type of sugar found in milk. It requires an enzyme (lactase) to break down during digestion. If you aren't able to produce the enzyme, the milk sugars can't be digested which results in the stomach issues. Taking Lactaid is essentially supplementing yourself with the enzyme. Calcium exists in other dietary sources besides milk so taking a calcium supplement shouldn't have lactose, aka milk sugars.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 05:19 AM
28

I think it's a typo. Casual not causal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 05:13 AM
1

I love the school of life! Their YouTube channel can be helpful as well!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 04:27 AM
14

I was harassed by a guy standing in line behind me while I was being processed through a bag check/security line. I was not wearing overly tight clothing or wearing a low cut shirt. Like no sir I have no desire to converse with you while in line after calling me Mami and telling me I'm "fine." 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 08:57 PM
2

Don't be sorry! I appreciate your help! Sorry if my writing/tone came off as terse/unfriendly! I've done some research into attachment theory, but I haven't seen much in the way of how to change your attachment styles if you're anxious, avoidant, disorganized, etc. I haven't read The Body Keeps The Score. I'm a little nervous about triggering myself. I don't want to ruin it for you, but I read on the CPTSD sub that the main client Van der Kolk writes about "was an abuser." Edits: trying to black…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 08:52 PM
1

I read Attached. It seemed like the authors' stance was for an anxiously attached person to find a securely attached person who can teach them a secure attachment style. Avoidant people didn't really have many options (imo).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 07:55 PM
17

You see so much hatred towards single mothers on that sub especially. It's really sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 11:03 PM
7

Thank you for your explanation! I don't see many posts in the level up group that get a lot of comments which is why I was wondering if it could be a stickied thread here in FDS. I'll keep a closer eye on the level up subreddit though and post as well. I sort of assumed that the career guidance would be coming from the Queens in the FDS thread whereas the level up sub might have more of a Queens-in-training /less established audience. I need to do more due diligence though. I'll start researchin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 10:06 PM
6

May I ask the rationale on two master's degrees? When is it a good idea to get a second master's? Was it for a career change? I'm thinking I might need to pursue a PhD so I'll be less likely to hit a glass ceiling. I wish we could have a career guidance /coaching thread where women can post their career questions and women with experience in that field could offer their advice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 09:47 PM
39

He had to make sure you were a good match for his daughter. /s If she didn't like you, he could move on to the next potential step-mommy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 09:35 PM
7

I sometimes feel that way (be ugly) when I lose weight. I'm not good at handling the extra "attention"/ low value men objectifying statements directed my way. There's something comforting in operating underneath their radar. I don't even have to lose much - 20 lbs - and somehow it just invites all of these unwanted comments about my body. I hate it. FDS is helping me feel empowered and more comfortable in speaking out against them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 08:21 PM
25

I sometimes feel that way (be ugly) when I lose weight. I'm not good at handling the extra "attention"/ low value men objectifying statements directed my way. There's something comforting in operating underneath their radar. I don't even have to lose much - 20 lbs - and somehow it just invites all of these unwanted comments about my body. I hate it. FDS is helping me feel empowered and more comfortable in speaking out against them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 08:21 PM
33

Translation for women: play dumb as he tells you vacuous factoid. Tell him how smart he is and ask a non-threatening follow-up question that pieces together what he's talking about in a way that is insightful (aka intelligent). 🙄 Edit: emoji emphasis
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 06:44 AM
3

Seriously! I hope OP can speak to this in more detail. It felt like OP had been inside my brain when I was reading this section.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 04:31 AM
128

🤮🤮🤮🤮 I hope those women are safe from the kinds of harm these sick scrotes are capable of inflicting upon these women. I shudder that men like this exist. Where are the men who say "not all men" that are calling out this disgusting and harmful behavior and insisting these posters seek help?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 12:01 AM
43

When you use humor as a coping mechanism...poor parents. They probably feel so conflicted because they want to be supportive of their daughter's career, but probably not supportive for something like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 05:46 PM
4

To be fair, they are literally designed to be addictive. I am trying to get off of all social media. Endless swiping and/or scrolling isn't worth it. I need to start reading again and filling my mind with knowledge that I can use for my career or to help level up personally. OLD turns into a thankless part-time job that isn't worth the risks or the energy expenditure. OP is right in the sense of OLD being the ultimate Pickmeisha platform. You're providing all of this information in the hopes for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 04:35 PM
30

I got a second job! Can't be tempted if I'm too busy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 04:04 AM
51

How dare you have that salad /standard! That's misandry! Can't you see it's clearly poisoning me? /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 03:56 AM
62

Me: contemplating giving OLD another try Also me: scrolls through FDS URGE TO SEEK OUT OLD = DESTROYED
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 03:47 AM
5

They must have asked the Pickmeishas for their opinion. 🤦🏻‍♀️ I was shocked as well by their comments. The poor woman lost her insurance coverage for anything related to treating cancer which can normally bankrupt people even with insurance coverage. That 1.5 million may not be enough to cover her medical costs if she develops cancer from this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 03:33 AM
189

🤮🥴 and this guy exists in the world...I hope the women who must interact with him are kept safe. Disgusting 🗑️. Guys like him are why women have to look out for one another.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 07:12 AM
12

z lib org can offer some free resources as well
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 05:47 PM
25

What about creating a Google drive for women to access the books and have a Google sheet with the book list? Users can sign up and indicate if they've submitted their review/summary. It could be helpful for a few people to review a book since each person might glean different details from the text. What a great idea! Thank you! ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 05:46 PM
3

Sex is their ultimate goal. Actually it's getting their d°ck wet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 04:45 AM
39

This post made me want to brainstorm some alternatives... These are what I came up: Value me before he. Red flags if he lags. Fail me? Bye baby! Won't stay if he's PUA.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 01:17 AM
18

This would be a good warning to add this post:ways scrotes build a false sense of intimacy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 12:52 AM
2

shocked Pikachu face uphold patriarchal values? How do they propose FDS is doing this? I literally see comments saying things like: decenter yourself from men, level up without relying on men, etc. Are they so narrowly focused on the fact that FDS says no 50/50 dinner dates that they think that is upholding patriarchal values? They failed to see the rest of the equation with all of our other investments so making a man pay for dinner is like the least they can do. Edit: left out a word.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 11:41 PM
11

Calendar sharing is another one. Setting up events in the future on the "couple's calendar." Except you haven't been together for very long (< 3 months).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 11:24 PM
28

Or when they post photos of themselves with babies and/or animals to their OLD profiles (to show that they are nURtUriNg). Bringing up babies in their life (like a friend's baby that they don't have a lot of involvement with but want to make it look like they're HV).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 11:18 PM
5

I'm here for that Veuve Clicquot. 🥂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 06:04 PM
16

I don't know who this is, but you've got my attention now!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 05:33 PM
28

I was recommended to purchase property in the place that I want to retire to (in anticipation of inflation of property values). The other option I have been contemplating is looking at Golden Visa type programs where you can obtain a passport by purchasing property or creating a business in these countries. After Covid, I realized the importance and privilege of having multiple passports. Since you like to travel, that could be an option as well if you haven't considered it. Happy travels!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 05:22 PM
4

I think normally that makes sense, but paired with all of the weirdness in the post it seems like he is more questionable than the cell service.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 03:21 PM
93

If you use a paper map, there's no way for police to track you via cell phone. Guy could have been using date 1 to scope out where he wanted to bury her body on date 2. Date 2 rolls around, he leaves his phone at home and uses the paper map to navigate instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 08:37 PM
76

From the article: ".. those who had known the suspect as a co-worker for years also “expressed generalized concerns about his mental health.” I wonder how many people lodged complaints or tried to raise the issue up with HR? How tragic for the victims' families. This could have been prevented if someone had intervened judging from this quote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 05:53 AM
27

I was looking for someone to point this out. Any text or OLD profile that reads like an elaborate extrasensory rollercoaster experience is definitely red pill. Ain't nobody normally writing like this on the regular except maybe George R.R. Martin...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 04:07 AM
102

I had this happen to me. 🚩🚩🚩 You're absolutely right. I was too naive to see through it at the time, to my detriment. I hope you were able to escape successfully.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 03:48 AM
109

I'm glad you were able to get free and get back to being the best version of you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 12:24 AM
3

Thank you for the lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 12:23 AM
5

"Why? Do you need me to tell you what's wrong with your brain?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 09:03 AM
13

Oh oh oh! You forgot the part about blaming women for them never being happy and avoiding any personal responsibility for their life outcomes! 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:57 AM
7

Because it was considered IRrelEvAnt cOnTeNt by the scrotes who were upvoting "sigh unzips pants."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:39 AM
9

Emotional manipulation and abuse will do that to you. I'm sorry you went through all of that. Sending you hugs. No one deserves that kind of treatment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:22 AM
15

You could record them saying something like: "I, full name, actively consent to the following sex acts: _______ with name of partner on this date." Although if the man deviated from the acts that the woman had given verbal consent to, that might be difficult to prove depending on what it was. Honestly if men stopped using alcohol as a date rape drug, men wouldn't have to worry since the woman would be able to remember everything (like giving consent!).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 07:58 AM
5

Try to ask them beforehand if "hanging out" means "date" or "hook-up..." See how they respond. If it's met with some vague response or an LOL...🙄 🚩 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 09:43 PM
5

It was eye opening for me once I started using it. I didn't realize how often I minimized myself when I was writing emails to people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 08:35 AM
20

If you use Chrome, search for the Chrome extension called Sorry, Not Sorry. It will highlight any time you are "kneecapping" yourself in emails (or apologizing unnecessarily).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 01:21 AM
10

I think the Kardashians are notorious for this. It's almost like the gravelly-sounding vocals you have when you first wake up in the morning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 01:20 AM
32

Hello sister! I wanted to share a few things in an effort to alleviate some of your fears. I had a roommate who graduated from an undergraduate degree and then started escorting/sex work after she graduated. She brought in a lot of money, but realized that there was a quickly approaching expiration date in addition to being unsatisfied with being an escort. She told the admissions committee about her escort experiences and was accepted. She got a master's in social work and public health and is …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 01:02 AM
1

Well in this case, I couldn't because it was someone I was working on a school project with...we have some other academic connections so it isn't feasible for a block and delete. Edit: I realized upon rereading my original comment that "erase your crush" might sound like erasing a contact. I am asking how people minimize or reduce their feelings for someone when FDS teaches us that crushes aren't working in our favor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 12:42 AM
3

How did you erase your crush? I renamed a contact as a descriptive somewhat generic phrase rather than their name so every time the person texted me I would have to think about who it was. Do you have any other tips?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 06:42 AM
3

My great grandma had the most incredible rose garden. They smelled incredible. I can't wait until I have space for a garden. I have a lot of plans for future flowers I would like to grow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 05:30 AM
17

I mean he cheated on his wife with Carrie Fisher while they were filming Star Wars. I think HF was in his early 30s while Carrie Fisher was 18/19? Carrie Fisher talked about the affair in her biography I believe. Edit: here's a link https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2016/nov/20/carrie-fisher-harrison-ford-affair-star-wars-memoir-interview-simon-hattenstone
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:17 AM
14

This reminds me of someone's comment talking about the relationship/love pie they imagine whenever they are feeling romantically lonely. This is a nice reminder of the various sources of love and affection we can have in a fulfilling life that aren't part of a romantic relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 10:27 PM
147

Ugh. This is one of many reasons I won't entertain having male friends anymore. I would get coffee with them and hang out for a few hours thinking it was friends catching up. I didn't realize it was a date (in their mind) until they started face lunging me. 🤦🏻‍♀️ It's like men want to have these ambiguous, casual hangouts without stating their intentions. Because then they're free to act in whatever capacity is most convenient for them: turn up the physical contact when they loose their current …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 10:12 PM
45

Abusive? I think you meant to say BDSM. 🙄 Wouldn't want to be kink shaming the alpha males. /s.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 04:24 AM
20

"Eat well out of spite." Your prioritized well-being and best life lived is the "revenge." At least that's what I tell myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:05 PM
61

"I dIDn'T fEEd mY SeX DoLLy aND iT dIED. I cAn'T gET aNoTHeR oNE. Waaaaa. fEEL SoRRy fOR mE bEcAUsE NoW I cAn'T hAVe SeX. Waaaaa"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 10:59 PM
72

Sounds like his "anorexia fetish" slid into necrophilia territory without him willing to admit it. I'm willing to bet he had sx with her while she was in her coma the next day and realized that something was wrong when she didn't react to him rping her. Fucking disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 10:54 PM
1086

Besides those dudes, there is somebody else who is willing to put me through school, start a business, fix my credit, and boss my life up: ME. 💪💪
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 10:48 PM
43

FDS should do an experiment where they post the same scenario but change the gender of the person posting. Then do a side-by-side comparison of the advice from posters. That should satisfy the "meN aRe RaTiOnAL crEAtUReS and usE LoGiCs" crowd.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 08:27 PM
22

It's like the sexual eye of Sauron gets turned on you when they've got it in their head that they want to be more than friends, especially the sneaky, let me try to hook up with you when I'm drunk so I'll have an excuse for my shitty behavior attempts from guy friends. I'm done with men in my life as "friends." None of them have been able to keep it in their pants even if they're dating someone else. 🙄🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 08:23 PM
16

It's better to use multiple dating apps if you are going to use OLD so you can screen these kind of guys with multiple dating profiles out of your dating rotation. If they're making swiping a full time job, then you probably don't want to invest time in them. They're most likely going to be the kind of guy that is swiping for new dates while you go to the bathroom while on your date with them. When you see these incongruities between OLD profiles : 🚩🚩🚩.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 03:42 PM
3

What was her philosophy for pushing the legal proceedings? That uniting the two of them against you would bring them closer?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 05:17 AM
32

It hurt my heart that he denigrated her for singing in the shower. That is such an obvious sign of joy on her part, and he's trying to crush it. My ex used to do something similar with me listening to music and dancing around while I did chores. #neveragain Partners should share your joy with you. I want someone who can be excited with me even if it might seem trivial to them. This poor girl needs to run as fast as possible away from this guy. She's sure to end up a shell of herself if she conti…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 04:54 AM
5

Thank you for the suggestions. This is perfect. ❤️🥇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 04:00 AM
11

Do you have recommendations on how to learn auto-mechanic maintenance? I want to learn more, but I'm not sure where/how I can do that without potentially messing up my car. I can change my lights, change a tire, add fluids to the appropriate container, add air to my tires, and that's about it. I hate not knowing more. I feel like it's a vulnerability that can be exploited at the mechanics.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 03:33 AM
55

"We need to make books cool again. If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, don't fuck them." John Waters I love this quote! Reading is so important. It's how we improve ourselves and keep our minds sharp.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 02:34 AM
17

Thank you for the recommendation for Charlie's Toolbox! ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 02:20 AM
70

Probably for two reasons: 1) you're suggesting the phone call screener so you're operating outside of their "ALpHa" frame which isn't allowed since they didn't suggest it 2) in person means that they can escalate physical touching in an attempt to manipulate you or move your date to multiple locations. They can't do that through a phone call.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 02:08 AM
13

Absolutely! Information = vulnerability because redpillers & PUAs will use it against you. They'll try to mirror your life or your interests with the information you provide them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 02:00 AM
36

Redpillers/PUA view women as objects that they psychologically and neurologically manipulate by using a variety of strategies that FDS does a great job of revealing. It's a game of numbers to them. They have lost any sense of women's humanity when they interact with you. They are "consuming" women. Due to their behavior, it's why women shouldn't care about using block and delete and why women shouldn't waste their time CoMmUniCATiNG. Don't waste your time. You can't convince someone of your huma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 01:55 AM
9

If it does work, it's with pickmeisha types who are likely to ignore the parade of red flags waving in front of their face. FDS women see the games being played and walk away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 09:35 PM
3

Not sure if you have visited skincare addiction subreddit, but they have an awesome wiki about different products (e.g., moisturizer, sunscreen, toner, etc.). I found their subreddit suggestions quite helpful. There is also one for skincare addiction over 30 as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 04:29 AM
74

Don't forget trichomoniasis. It isn't usually tested for and (of course) 🙄 it's usually asymptomatic in men. Before I found FDS, I was stealthed by a guy who took off the condom when he was behind me. We had been on a drink date (🤡🤡🤡) so I didn't notice him taking it off. 30 days later I got a surprise from him! (He must have thought my love language was receiving gifts! 🙄🤡)I had to get treated for it. He had the audacity to claim that I got it from other guys I must be fucking when I told him t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 01:23 AM
10

Some protection is better than no protection in my book. Some HPV strains are so nasty (cancer causing etc) that it's better to get some sort of protection going. Obviously can't rely on men to protect us from HPV (on top of everything else). And if a guy stealths you about using a condom, then you've opened yourself up to some potential issues.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 02:43 AM
27

You can get the HPV vaccine if you're 35+ but it is considered to be an off-label use of the vaccine. The vaccine was originally validated in younger women so I think that's partially why they can't guarantee efficacy for older women. There's also the issue of older women already possibly having some of the HPV strains since it's so prevalent. It's definitely worth getting though.(the vaccine, not HPV)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 12:05 AM
5

I love great Mom wisdom because mine has not shown me wisdom. She loves me, but she doesn't seem to ever have her life together. Her life is an example of what not to do. I've always sought out substitute Moms growing up. Posts like these are so helpful! I hope more FDS women feel comfortable sharing their mother's wisdom. ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 03:29 AM
5

I also have words of affirmation, but I have to be careful of LVM who are too/overly flattering. I find I can conflate flattery with words of affirmation. I think it's an artifact/symptom of my pickmeisha self and wanting to be "seen." Do you find this is something you also experience? How do you prevent yourself from being easily swayed?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:21 AM
3

I loved that show! It was so eye opening. I would love for it to be a regular series.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:17 AM
40

Releasing myself from the need to know "why" they treated me badly stopped me from needing closure. The bad behavior was answer enough: they didn't respect me. Loving myself and valuing my time means that the bad behavior was enough to turn away from them and move on. Closure was just an excuse to extend emotional pain and suffering with the hope that somehow the other person would change their mind and start treating me better (#pickme).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:12 AM
1

Jeff Allen --> Real Social Dynamics.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 04:58 AM
44

I tried to talk to my therapist about it and she basically pushed me to look for "alternative explanations" for these men's behavior. I don't know if she didn't believe me and/or wasn't aware of the movement, but you can come off as paranoid. I would warn women here to not tell men about it. I did that and the male friends I told both started practicing TRP tactics. They made it a point to consistently neg me and show me their plates that they were fucking. They are no longer in my life. Dumb fo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 04:55 AM
10

It sucks that women could be relied upon to play the trailing spouse role for men, but the reverse doesn't hold up. Another reason why we need to prioritize our careers and ourselves because men never will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 04:39 AM
124

"Rules for thee but not for me" - LVM
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 02:30 AM
62

Even that is being threatened. I saw an OF ad in my FDS thread. I reported it as harassment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 02:48 PM
3

Literally would be like "If I skip lunch this week and eat the $1 pizza pockets i got on sale for dinner, then I'll have enough gas money to last until payday."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 02:42 PM
3

What about women's leadership development? Best practices to develop as a leader and how to avoid backlash when enacting leadership characteristics?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 04:46 AM
26

That sounds like an at-home ingredients remedy when you need a full-strength prescription. I hope your friend was able to fully heal. My first thought is that it would be retraumatizing more than it would be helpful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 03:05 AM
11

I'm sorry that you went through that. I hope you find a good therapist. I once had a therapist who "pushed" back because they felt it was important for their clients to practice advocating for themselves. I hated it. Felt like i was having to rationalize / argue for everything with them. Did not feel good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 03:41 AM
7

Look for a therapist that specializes in CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) and/or EMDR (Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing). These are the two most effective treatment modalities for treating C-PTSD. While you may not be in a romantic relationship for much longer, you always have the relationship with yourself -- and that relationship is never too late to find a new therapist for. "To find out if this therapist would be able to gauge the subtleties of a vulnerable covert narcissists …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 02:11 AM
10

Do you have suggestions on a weight training regimen?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 01:43 AM
4

Gives new meaning to Palmela Anderson and her 5 bossbitch sisters! (I say this in a jesting spirit).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 02:30 AM
33

Haaaahhhaaa. Had a situationship for years and left. Guy finds another partner. Pickme answers when he's in town and wants to hang out as friends. Plot twist: he's drunk when we meet up. He tries to make out with me when he has a fiancee back home. Pickme buys him an Uber back to his airbnb. Few days later tell a girlfriend about the situation who hangs out with him and his fiancee back in my.home town.... Now I'm no longer welcome in that friend group even though I didn't do anything wrong and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 02:25 AM
7

Check out the website "put a cup in it." They have a quiz to help match you with a few cup options based on your answers. They also have coupons.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 10:15 AM
105

It makes me think there's a "one who got away" in his life she doesn't feel great about. This is her way of trying to feel better about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 12:29 AM
8

Check out the website "put a cup in it." They have a quiz that helps match you with the right cup. It suggested the Super Jennie to me and I have been happy ever since. Edit : sometimes they'll have coupons too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 12:23 AM
27

LVM/ZVM : "YoU sHoULD hAve ChoSEN bEttER!" If you're too naive and trusting, it's your fault. If you protect yourself from being abused or manipulated by having standards and vet, then you're "too picky and doomed to die alone." I'm sorry you went through those things. Glad you found FDS, queen!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/21 02:54 PM
5

I respectfully disagree. If we consider the efforts businesses are putting in to accommodate neurodivergent applicants and employees, then this doesn't work. https://qz.com/work/1981466/ At the end of the day, employees can provide a lot if they aren't stressed out. Google and other large tech companies prioritize making sure their employees aren't stressed out for the long term. (Neurodivergent or not) When people can flourish, they can be incredibly productive. Hours at work doesn't necessaril…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 02:38 AM
13

Essentially pick-up artists realize that women out and about during their day are harder to approach because they aren't inebriated (vs their night/club game. Since women's guards are up, they have to have a "valid reason" for approaching us which is where they ask you for help with something like asking for directions (Google maps wasn't working for some reason... Weird?).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 12:50 AM
1

Do you think you might need to move away if he has such easy access to you? At some point he will figure out that you've put him on the pay no mind list and are ignoring him. Will that realization be enough to stoke his ire and anger? I did not see a.comment in the original post that he had such easy access to you and your home. I wish you well and hope that you stay safe. Have you created a safety plan in case he feels instigated to become more violent towards you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 12:44 AM
68

This is also a Pua tactic for "day game" strategy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 08:50 AM
3

It's like save yourself the trouble. skip steps 1-4 and replace with: bought myself some flowers. 💐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 08:04 AM
1

How do you balance transparency with oversharing? I want to be honest/transparent with people, but I think I often enter into oversharing. It isn't always one-sided though. I make long standing connections with my coworkers. I really want to be better at managing my oversharing though. My treatment goal in therapy has been to work on boundaries so I really resonate with this post and your comment. I'm always looking for more resources and perspectives. Thank you. 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/21 12:52 AM
4

As an observer of the comments section, it seemed like you actually didn't go full no contact though. You muted the person which leaves room for you to be contacted by your ex (especially since you're still able to see what your ex has written you) which is one of the points that was being reiterated by commenters. It seemed like splitting hairs about going NC when FDS is pretty straightforward about block and delete. I know it's hard to completely push out someone who has been in your life sinc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 10:45 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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