Toxic femininity is an interesting term for that behavior. All the feminist groups I've seen that talk about "cattyness", or however you want to say it, to refer to it using the term "internalized misogyny" which is similar to toxic masculinity, but different because of the difference in the way men and women are taught about how to related to their own gender.
Toxic Masculinity isn't saying that men are toxic; it's saying that coercive messages like men shouldn't react when someone has done or said something hurtful are imposed on men all the while with the guise that they need to accept these messages as apart of masculinity. So many men are completely unaware of these messages which can completely destroy a person from the inside, but if you want to deny it, fine.
