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Character-Change-507 Archive

View 4 posts and 86 comments by Character-Change-507 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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5

Don't make the same mistake I did. I fought for 2 years trying my hardest to save it. I lost myself along the way while she put me through hell. My biggest regret, not accepting the reality I was living in. Once she decides it's over, there is nothing you can do to stop it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/26 02:31 PM
4

Youre gonna hate hearing it, but sadly it's the truth. It takes time. It does get better but you need to be the one who makes it better. Start small. Sometimes just taking a shower is a big enough win for the day
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/26 02:48 PM
8

Go out into the woods and let it out. Scream. As loud as you can. Smash branches on trees. Have the ugly cry
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/26 01:38 PM
3

I'm 2 years out as well. Progress has been slow. I struggle with my independence. Not really sure what to do with myself. Even if I had an idea of what I wanted to do, I'm years away from financially comfortable again. Shit sucks some days
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/26 03:33 PM
2

I go to the gym, idk maybe I'm not putting in enough effort but lifting doesn't give me this healing effect everyone claims it does
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 05:19 PM
1

Feels like I'll never get through it. I know im far better than where I was last year, but yes. The feeling of failure, the trauma still haunts me pretty much daily. 2 years later and I still think about it all the time. Forever changed by this and I fear for the worst
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 05:16 PM
3

My purpose was to start a family. After 15 years together my ex cheated on me right as we were actively trying to have a kid. We didn't rush into kids, we built our life and careers 1st, I felt like we were on top of the world and my ex destroyed it in a matter of moments. Hobbies and meaningless sex don't fill the void I have of wanting a family
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 05:13 PM
2

My therapist saved my life in the real early days. They helped me gather my thoughts, set goals for myself and taught me how to handle the stages of grief. After about 6 months I felt like they could no longer help me so I stopped but I'm forever grateful for their time
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 02:16 PM
1

Thank you for removing the burden from my life and saving me from making the biggest mistake of my life of marrying her.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 02:14 PM
16

I'm no good at this single thing
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/26 06:23 AM
1

I thought I'd be afraid of it, now I can't get enough of it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 08:45 AM
5

It will feel like that for a while. Eventually you will come to see that it's not lonely, it's peaceful, its quiet, it's clean.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 09:43 AM
1

People who were part of my life for 25 years. People I thought I could trust and rely on. Once my ex started her lies, sides were picked.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 06:04 PM
2

I agree, having the right people in your life is vital. How many of us lost that support when the divorce happened. How many of us learned who our true people were and who were just acquaintances
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 03:03 PM
1

Myself along with millions of other men will beg to differ. We've lived through the hell of having a woman rewarded, supported, and encouraged despite clearly being in the wrong while we are discarded after getting gutted. You say bullshit, I say it's the cold hard truth. I don't use it to victimize myself, I use it as a very hard lesson learned so I don't make the same mistakes again
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 12:22 PM
14

Girls are easy to get into bed. Even at my fucking lowest, fat, no confidence, devasted from my ex cheating on me, hundreds of thousands in debt and FAR from ready to entertain a girl and even I was able to get one in my bed. Take this opportunity to find peace in the solitude, don't worry about the next girl.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 12:15 PM
2

Welcome to your red pill moment. You sadly learn just how this society truly is. Women are encouraged, rewarded, and supported no matter what, us men, disposable
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 06:18 PM
1

Maybe. Idk. The three of us grew up as friends, she cheats and he sticks his head in the sand. He is in a miserable sexless relationship himself so maybe he's hoping for some
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/26 09:17 AM
5

I just had this last week. A life long friend just turned out to be an acquaintance.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 11:55 AM
1

Yeah. In my anger as I learned what happened, I said some unforgivable things
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 06:08 PM
3

It's hard as hell, it will be for a long time, don't fight to get her back. She wants to go, let her go. You will get through it. It'll take work. It'll take time. It's gonna suck, but it does get better. You're still young, you still have your whole life ahead of you. Use this time alone to find peace. Embrace the solitude, because once you have your peace, you will never give it up. The most important thing I can tell you, do not make a permanent decision for a temporary problem, not over a wo…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 01:52 PM
1

Yeah. I felt I needed to make this move so I can become the man I'm supposed to be. Every time I interact with him I just feel like I'm dragged back down into the past, the negativity, no more.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 01:33 PM
3

Sad but true
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 01:31 PM
3

I told him that right now I need people in my life who will pick me, who are on my side. He would constantly tell me I'm not here to pick sides. Otherwise I feel I'm doing okay, progress is slow as the complete rug pull absolutely destroyed my life. But it's been nearly 2 years, I like to think I'm through the worst of it.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 02:32 AM
1

I'm gonna be brutally honest. It'll never get better. Shell allow jealousy of others from social media to consume her. Trust me. I lived that hell. It did not end well
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 06:05 PM
3

Took my dumbass about 1.5 years to accept that our relationship was over
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/26 02:37 PM
7

No. Trust is gone
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/26 06:55 PM
3

I kept the king sized bed
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 01:29 PM
6

Women are rewarded in divorce
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 11:17 AM
2

Unfortunately she made the choice and your whole family now must live with that choice. It's hard as hell, for a long time, but it does get easier.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 03:16 PM
4

The longer you stay, the more you loose yourself and the more expensive it becomes. Trust me. It's better to end it and find what makes you happy because clearly you're not. It's scary as hell, but end it in your terms, at least you have that luxury. I, like many others was blindsided and had no choice but to end it and move on. Don't wait for her to end it
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/26 05:41 PM
2

I fear I'll never have another relationship because of it. After trust is shattered, it feels impossible to ever let someone close ever again
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/26 03:31 PM
3

Beyond disappointing. We worked so hard to set ourselves up for a stable calm life. Now she gets to live in chaos
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/26 04:12 AM
3

My ex went running off with a dude fatter than me. No job. Multiple kids with multiple girls. Living on moms couch and doesn't even have a car. 15 years thrown away for that. I'll never understand
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/26 08:40 PM
2

Love Feels pretty hopeless for me ngl. Afraid to let anybody close to me anymore. Success? absolutely. Saving big and paying off debt. Just need time. Happiness? Eh. Some days are good. Some are bad. It's difficult
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/26 08:30 PM
8

Yeah probably never again for me. I'm considered one of the lucky ones for not having child support or alimony but the mental damage she did to me forever has changed me. These women are not worth it
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 07:25 PM
3

If I ever have a kid no fucking way in hell I'm letting them go through the same slaughter house I did
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/26 02:46 PM
1

You deserve to be happy too. Sticking it out just for the kids is a sure fire way to live a life of regret and misery. At least the kids will appreciate you just being an ATM.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 02:39 PM
1

Disappointing for sure
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 02:34 PM
2

He's not ready plain and simple imo. Biggest reason why I haven't dated. I know I want a relationship, would love to start a family, but I simply do not think I'm capable of committing myself to another woman after what Ive experienced. Right now I feel I would just be wasting both my time and any girls time if I tried dating. I know I'm not ready, and not sure when I will be. He sounds like he's not ready
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 02:29 PM
4

The biggest disappointment is knowing how despite your best efforts to save it, it was hopeless. She only cared about herself. Didn't matter who she hurt
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 06:38 AM
13

I worked my ass off for my house. It was always a purchase for me. Not her. I refused to give it up and throw my money away renting. Yes owning a home costs money in repairs and maintenance, but I consider it an investment. Sitting on a pile of cash
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 06:34 AM
2

It takes time, the silence will destroy you. But I promise you on the other side is peace. And it is so sweet. Start small. Keep your home clean. You feel good about your place you feel good about yourself. It takes time
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/25 02:48 PM
3

Cooking. Hiking. Tried fishing but the fish didn't agree with that.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/25 05:15 PM
9

Have some self respect and answer this question yourself. Your wife is entertaining another and your asking if that deserves divorce
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/25 02:21 PM
4

I'll never forget that moment of doubt. Glad I trusted myself and waited. Sure enough my ex revealed her true self
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/25 07:52 PM
3

My friend messaged me and told me he was concerned about my ex. I was in denial fighting her over it for months. Seeing someone else recognize her actions and it wasn't me. He helped me see through her gas lighting
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/25 06:10 PM
1

I have seen a therapist, haven't gone in a while though. I have another session booked for next week. My mindset is not scarcity, I learned how women operate, I learned their hypergamous nature, I learned how the courts and society reward them while the man is destroyed and tossed away like garbage. Knowing all that, I have accepted that I will not take the gamble with my life. Not worth it. I worked far too hard to set myself up for stability and success and I will not lose that. I've tried mul…
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 07:50 AM
3

Yes. I lost 15 years of my life to my ex. The only reasoning I got was "you worked too much" we had a wonderful relationship right up until it wasn't. She blew it up in an instant, I will not go through that again
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 02:24 AM
4

As of now I have zero desire to add another woman into my life. I'm not wasting anymore time chasing after girls
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/25 04:23 PM
15

Nope. I let everyone know what she did. I'm not worried about protecting the reputation of a cheater.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 12:27 AM
4

I realized just how long she was lying to me. Made me feel like the biggest fool in the world
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/25 10:31 AM
15

Sorry to tell you, it's already over. She's got single friends telling her shes better off. Hope you're prepared. I spent 2 years trying to stop it and save it. Don't put yourself through that hell
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 12:09 AM
4

About -16 months. Maybe longer. I was in denial for a long time
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/25 12:02 AM
2

I wasn't perfect but I wasn't the one lying, cheating, betraying
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/25 12:42 PM
3

Very fortunate to have locked up a solid career in my late 20s. Losing my ex and her income was a big set back but I've adjusted. Also thank God she had issues conceiving because we were trying for kids
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 11:36 PM
3

Been in that rut for nearly a year, its hard as hell. I'm slowly crawling out, the desire to do something with myself is taking over. I can't mope about it forever, gotta move on. I'm gonna start fishing once the ice thaws.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/25 12:01 AM
5

My coworker told me something very similar
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/25 11:52 PM
10

I always told myself. If I end it now she wins the house and my life insurance would pay it off for her. FUCK THAT AND FUCK HER. I can end myself after the house buyout is done so I can leave it to my mother. Turned out that mindset got me through the hardest darkest days and I'm doing much better now and I have a long lengthy (delayed multiple times) house buyout process to thank.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/25 11:49 PM
2

It just sounds like you're in an impossible scenario and I feel for you. I totally get it.... My ex was unhappy with my job as well and demanded I change careers, after thousands of applications and dozens of interviews, I could not, would not take a $30-$40k pay cut. Sadly my unhappy ex did not appreciate that I prioritized our stability. I'll pray for you, but do your best. Work as hard as you can and my wisdom to you is this... No one is coming to save you, you will move mountains to get it d…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/25 05:40 PM
5

$400k mortgage on $90k salary? And 3 kids? Serious how the hell are you guys afloat? Now the wife is talking divorce.... Sorry bro. There's no easy way to say this ... Your fucked. Best advice I can give you is brace yourself for when it all blows up.... Expect child support, alimony, losing your house, and years of depression... I wish I could offer help, offer suggestions but I have no fucking clue how you can fix your situation. Getting a new better job will mean nothing for your wife because…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/25 08:01 AM
7

I'm in the process of buying out my ex. I refuse to let her take my house I worked for. You should keep it for yourself and sell it if you don't want to keep it. Don't trust an ex to be a tenant. It will not end well I promise you.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/25 09:13 PM
1

You did not fail. Don't ever blame yourself. You wanted to fight your relationship, for your children. Your wife wants it to end, she doesn't want to work through it, she wants to rip apart the family for her own selfish desires. She failed you and your kids. Don't ever forget that
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/25 07:32 AM
19

No mercy. Go for the throat and destroy her the way she destroyed you. Win custody of your children and thrive without her. Sorry you're going through this
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/25 07:24 AM
–

Reddit has been a major help for me. Many of us share the same story and experience so there's a ton of guidance as well as just people to listen to you. Definitely get therapy for yourself. Sorry you're going through this but "I'm unhappy" is a death sentence to any relationship. No matter what you do it won't be good enough. She needs to find happiness with herself and she's going to cast her family aside to find it
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/25 09:37 AM
11

If you feel you need proof of domestic abuse it's time to gtfo bro. Save yourself
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/25 12:40 AM
1

I have no desire for meaningless sex. Tried it for a bit, I want more. I know I want companionship but I'm nowhere near ready and as I heal more n more the less I think I want another woman in my life like that
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/25 05:36 AM
5

Dating definitely helped for a bit but the dating scene is awful
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/25 07:24 PM
8

She destroyed me and I cry for myself because I know I'll never be the same I shed a tear nearly everyday. Have a good cry at least once a week.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/25 07:23 PM
16

You loved her. Just like I loved my ex. You cared about her. You want her to succeed and you don't want to see her fall. Unfortunately it's no longer in your control or your concern. She made this choice and you both must live with it. I'll never forget the disappointment I felt when our friends told me she quit her career of nearly 15 years and how far she set her self back. You're a good man and I'm sorry for what happened to you.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/25 03:23 PM
3

I blame both. He manipulated her, told her everything she wanted to hear, but ultimately she made her choices. Both are at fault
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 02:42 PM
3

10 months after I ended it I'm still waiting for her to take accountability
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/25 03:03 PM
1

Get my fat ass to the gym, enough excuses. Work work work, get the loans paid off and start banking big again. Meet new people, I'm very introverted and my divorce has shown me how alone I truly am. Do my best to stop dwelling on the past and starting moving forward towards happiness again
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/25 12:27 AM
4

Get your own lawyer now. Sure she's agreeable now. I promise you as the divorce carries out, it'll get uglier and uglier and shell get more and more greedy. A single lawyer cannot represent both sides.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/25 12:10 AM
5

Nope. She wanted this life despite my best efforts to convince her otherwis. We both have to live with it. Im thriving while she's falling
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 11:36 PM
4

Well we were still together and living under the same roof so I was pretty devastated and handled it probably as poorly as one could. I kicked her ass to the curb
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 10:56 PM
3

Do what mine did. Lie to her and sneak around for nearly 2 years until she hates life with you so much she ends it
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 12:39 AM
2

Word for word this hit hike on every level. I'm so sorry man. I know it fucking hurts. It does get easier but it's hard as hell.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 11:54 AM
1

Dating was a big help in realizing I could be happy without my ex. But it made me miss so much about when I was with her. I also fear truly being able to connect and love someone new like that again. I feel like I gave it my all and it still wasn't enough
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 11:48 AM
1

I'm heartbroken but thankful we never had kids. I couldn't imagine being strong enough for them where I can't even be strong enough for myself. We focused on our careers and bought a house before children. Children was the next step in our plan and I was going to ask her to marry me. I'll never forgive her for the betrayal. The lies. Her destroying the life we spent half our life building together. All for nothing.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 11:46 AM
1

I got a great career that will set me for the rest of my life. I need to motivate myself to work on my health
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 11:44 AM
1

I spent the last 15 years of my life building myself to become a husband a father. We focused on ourselves before children. Got careers, bought a house a few years ago, the next step was to start our family. Now I'm alone with no direction. Complete reset in my 30s
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 11:42 AM
1

I think about it every single day. A man alone with his thoughts for 8 months now.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 11:34 AM
12

You cannot do any worse than my 1st time after my breakup. 1st time using a condom in nearly a decade. I couldn't stay hard between the condom and the anxiety of "holy shit I'm actually having sex with someone new" I was a disaster
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 10:39 PM
7

Your children will understand. If they are real young they will learn over time. Sadly your wife chose this life for you and your family and everyone has to live with the consequences. You can be a better father to your children without your wife. I'm sorry. Your family is ruined thanks to her actions... She failed you guys the same way my ex failed me
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 01:27 PM
7

Been through this myself... Put up with it for nearly 2 years. It was hell. I'm sorry. Save yourself and walk away. Love yourself before her. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. Get a good lawyer and ready up. Divorce is hell and very long. And warning. She will absolutely be petty about the money no matter what she says. Protect your money and your bank info ASAP
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 01:19 PM
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