ChildTherapist Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	The Steubenville rape trial and /r/MensRights. I've heard similar reports of the small group/most rapes theory. I agree and am very supportive of Men Can Stop Rape type groups that ally men and women together on this issue. I don't see it as one vs another, but all in this together. Thanks for the Dr. Lisak reference. I'll look it up.	/r/MensRights	21/03/13 05:36 AM
1	The Steubenville rape trial and /r/MensRights. Excellent article on exactly your point here. http://feministcurrent.com/7339/the-steubenville-rape-case-this-is-masculinity/	/r/MensRights	20/03/13 10:01 PM
1	On Teaching Men Not To Rape I had a very similar experience. I made a comment on an MRA-type site and was "outed" as a crazy, uber-feminist, man-a-hatin' woman-type-woman. Made the SAME freaking comment on a feminist site and was "outed" as a rigid, narrow-minded, MRA, rape apologizin', patriarchal bastard man-type-man. I sat back from that experience and thought, okay, am I doing something very wrong...or very right!	/r/MensRights	08/12/12 12:31 AM
1	On Teaching Men Not To Rape Yes, I so agree with this. It's fascinating to read them both saying that the Other Side doesn't want what they want then go on to espouse beliefs that are nearly identical.	/r/MensRights	07/12/12 06:58 PM
2	On Teaching Men Not To Rape Well done, shittake! I tried to make a similar point on another post and it was not well received. I agree Feminism and Men's Rights have a lot in common, but the extreme elements of both don't see this.	/r/MensRights	07/12/12 09:25 AM
1	I'm a little confused You do see though, that to some extent you make the OP's point. If you accept that your position is outside the moderate and don't see the common ground you share with your counterparts in the feminist movement, that's fine. I agree with the premise that there are areas where everyone agrees that people are harmed by sex and gender based stereotypes. Those on the extremes on both sides, however, don't want to see that. This comes across in the underlying anger and pettiness you see in a lot of t…	/r/MensRights	06/12/12 08:20 PM
2	I'm a little confused I do, but I'm guessing they are all ones you have heard to date and won't be convinced or impressed by. I agree with your basic statement about houses, robbery and precautions, but as I'm sure you've heard ad nauseum, it's the repetitiveness of this stance that's patronizing more so than the idea. And the underlying limitedness of it. That women must be more vigilant, more careful, more mindful of where they go, how they dress, how they behave lest the failure to do so be raised as A reason they…	/r/MensRights	02/12/12 09:03 AM
2	I'm a little confused Then you spend very little time with law enforcement, which is only one area, but an important one, where these attitudes exist. I have worked alongside them on cases, done rape intervention work and have done trainings with police. Some of them are brave enough to challenge their attitudes by asking questions and still don't change their minds. The ones who don't ask scare me more. You write off the Akin situation as one of "those rare ones," but again for someone to rise to that level of promi…	/r/MensRights	02/12/12 03:16 AM
3	I'm a little confused I agree with your basic assumption. I prefer to listen than counter. Not that I pretend to be great at it, but I try.	/r/MensRights	02/12/12 12:37 AM
1	I'm a little confused Wow, tying all feminism, its philosophies and history together and essentially calling it fascist. That's never been done before. And it couldn't equally and easily be done for men's rights ideology. Come on, people. When we deliberately villify a group to this extreme, we are engaging in the ancient human practice of demonizing an "other" in order to justify treating them differently. It's just so obvious and basic a ploy that we should all be able to laugh at its poor logic and walk past. Plea…	/r/MensRights	02/12/12 12:34 AM
3	I'm a little confused I can get behind this. Good point.	/r/MensRights	02/12/12 12:15 AM
3	I'm a little confused Aaaaand point made! Thanks for the assist, tmg.	/r/MensRights	02/12/12 12:14 AM
3	I'm a little confused Sorry, no, tmg, I'm calling bs on this. There is an international movement, which I'm sure you've heard of, called SlutWalk. It's a huge multi-cultural, worldwide cause that came out of a comment a man made. Not just any man, but an official law enforcement officer IN the capacity of his job providing a lecture at a major university to an audience of hundreds of college students, professors and community members. In this lecture, he stated, ""women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not t…	/r/MensRights	02/12/12 12:09 AM
10	I'm a little confused Because of my field, I also do a lot of reading on various sides of the main issues that get discussed by mens and womens rights groups. I agree with you that what I call the middle of the road types; the ones who are educated on the issues and interested in human justice, are pretty much on the same page. Then the further you go from that center, you start getting those extreme ridiculous opinions. Like the old "all men are rapists" or "all women belong in the kitchen" crap that you hear. I con…	/r/MensRights	01/12/12 11:48 AM
1	If we're too scared to have the discussion. We aren't going to learn anything. You mean if one person says they're using birth control but really isnt? That's awful. I would think that is a sort of rape, yes.	/r/MensRights	28/08/12 04:33 PM
1	If we're too scared to have the discussion. We aren't going to learn anything. Thanks for linking this, PierceHarlan. I had no idea your site existed or that this issue was represented by anyone. I'm a psychotherapist dealing with abuse, sexual assault, a wide variety of issues affecting children, teens, young adults. I'm an advocate for survivors but I am very glad your site exists. It's not a largely talked about area, but I'm aware of many clients I've had who lied about being sexually assaulted. Your site says about 8% of reports are false. It pains me to say it, but I…	/r/MensRights	28/08/12 01:56 AM
2	If we're too scared to have the discussion. We aren't going to learn anything. Wow, that's a really thorough explanation. From my experience, most of the unclear situations have to do with varying degrees of alcohol/drug use AND partners not knowing how to communicate well, not with someone acting from obvious "malice" as ckfighter wrote. I've had any number of teens/young adults tell me, "Well I said he could but I really didn't want to" sort of thing. And we walk through that to see where s/he might have known that s/he really didn't want to.	/r/MensRights	27/08/12 07:11 PM
1	If we're too scared to have the discussion. We aren't going to learn anything. The problem with that first scenario is also the fact that many rapes are inconclusive. MOST, in fact! There is no clear answer from a legal standpoint that there was a rape. There won't even be a trial in many cases. So, does that mean those women won't have access to the choice of aborting?	/r/MensRights	27/08/12 06:04 PM
0	If we're too scared to have the discussion. We aren't going to learn anything. And this is what makes you one of the good ones, not to use a cliche, but seriously! Being able to talk about this stuff openly/honestly with each other is what will help make change. That and getting a more reasonable balance of women and men in office. This is why I get frustrated with women who do shut this stuff down or are afraid of certain topics being discussed, because then who are we helping??	/r/MensRights	27/08/12 05:46 PM
1	If we're too scared to have the discussion. We aren't going to learn anything. As far as I know there hasn't been a study on this particular thing, but there have been a number of studies on women's behavior during ovulation; increased odds of cheating, increased one-night-stands, basically an increased interest in sex, that kind of thing. Combine that with what we know about rapes occurring more frequently in women of fertile age. It could lead to the conclusion that there is more opportunity for a rapist to find a women when they are fertile. This of course is different …	/r/MensRights	27/08/12 05:19 PM
0	If we're too scared to have the discussion. We aren't going to learn anything. I think part of it is scary for us because who gets to define when a rape is "legitmate" or not? So, yeah, we shut it down because there are so many variables and a lot of people that want to excuse rape or other kinds of sexual assault as not being real. I just finished an AMA on the experience of women orgasming or responding to rape and, though there were a lot of really good responses, there were some people suggesting that it made it "not real." I think our fear comes from where the line ge…	/r/MensRights	27/08/12 05:01 PM