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CoachToughLove Archive

View 2 posts and 129 comments by CoachToughLove on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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–

Yes, male dating success is much more a numbers game than many want to admit. And for the men here: have you actually seen your dating results improve significantly simply by approaching more women and caring less about rejection? Absolutely back when I was dating. Or does this only work for men who were attractive enough to succeed anyway? It's a lot less about outward attraction and a lot more about inner attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/26 11:41 PM
1

What am I supposed to do with this low effort comment? I can assume you're referring to the concept of "attraction level." This is your field right? Tell me how it is. Let's have a good faith debate.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/26 05:59 PM
1

I appreciate your reply. Yes those qualities would appear to be consciously sought after, what I'm saying is subconsciously the response is even more important than then conscious awareness. I like the Kindness trait, and I definitely think it holds quite a bit of weight in LTR's. I also agree with your "niceness" sentiment. The trickiest part for me at this point, is where exactly to cut off the trait descriptions, say having 8 vs. 12 vs. 16... . There's going to be some overlap. The key is if …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/26 03:46 PM
–

As kindly and gently as possible, what all have you tried to see if it works or not? Have you: Changed up your appearance? Altered how you approach them? Worked on being more charismatic, or more confident? Do you try different date venues? Are you aware of your emotional pacing? Have you read books on dating? Have you read well rated books on dating? I agree with the your general sentiment of men getting rejected more, but I can't buy into blaming it all on women.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 08:47 PM
1

“There’s no monkey-branching if you’re her best option!” That's not what I said. What I said was "as long as her attraction level is high." When her attraction level is high you're the only option she wants. But how many men can be a “best option”? 1% 5%? Well, that depends. Are they growth minded? Coachable? Since the attraction pattern is largely predicable, and it's about feelings and perception anyway for them ... and especially since modern dating is so broken for many anyway... I'd say mos…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 07:45 PM
2

For sure. You did what you had to do for that situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 07:24 PM
1

That's a situation no one should have to be trapped in IMO. So sorry! I have a friend in this exact scenario and fully expect her to leave as soon as the kids are old enough, whatever age that might be.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 05:01 PM
1

I’m sorry to hear that. Why did you stay?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 04:32 PM
0

Ok awesome. I'm glad you're able to manage your feelings to your best benefit. So as another example. Women that are with guys that abuse them emotionally or physically, why do they stay with the guy in your opinion?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 03:47 PM
1

Just a few thoughts as I'm afraid we're not going to be able to understand one another, yet maybe others could benefit from reading. Sharing information new or otherwise in efforts to help people is not Dehumanizing. Super Humanizing refers to AI. What is de-humanizing is directly insulting others, which on the sub usually comes from the polar opposites of "blue" and "red." It's demonstrated constantly. Look through the comments on this post and observe how many people are considering other's be…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 03:40 PM
1

At least we can agree on something and I'm happy for that. As a hypothetical, say there was a lack of understanding of what caused you to be attracted to certain men vs. others, would you want to know and understand that or no?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 03:16 PM
0

Meanwhile, men are the protagonists, Not my view. Men and women are complimentary. you get to criticize women for NOT seeing that bullshit. I'd rather them understand it as well, for their own health and well being sake. The human experience is basically defined by self-awareness. Says who? Why is us having a subconscious that compels us as humans "dehumanizing." It's a part of who we are. So when you assert that women lack self-awareness… what does that imply? I'm sure men lack self awareness i…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:23 AM
1

No human makes decisions with no logic at all, I have to disagree. It is dehumanizing to pretend women make decisions based on animal instinct. IMO. We. Are. Animals. We're just the most "advanced" on earth. That doesn't mean we need to go "savage", or not have morals, but it also means we shouldn't forget where we come from.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:18 AM
0

To answer your celebrity question, the most common attraction wreckers for LTR's are when a man either treats his partner too much like a roommate/lack of romance, or lacks self-control with issues ranging from jealousy, drinking/drugs, etc. There's a couple others but being a celebrity matters not. You're not going to want to hear this most likely, but it's us as men that are at fault, because it's us as men that drive their attraction and repulsion.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:14 AM
1

We have logic and reason to override our ancient instincts. This is what I just said above. there is no reason a woman with a fully functioning brain would be making decisions based solely on those instincts. Why not? You don't think both men and women are largely compelled to action by our emotions? It is by dehumanizing a woman into “women” that you forget they are cognizant creatures with fully functioning reason. How is recognizing we have subconscious processes compelling us "dehumanizing"?…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:09 AM
1

Totally agree yes. And hey, at least people can agree on confidence being universally attractive so there's that.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 11:20 PM
2

Fiancee cheated, then broke up with me several weeks later, then got into a relationship with same guy, then ended up married to him for many years. Second LTR broke up with me and was dating a friend of ours shortly after, so inconclusive I guess on this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 11:19 PM
1

If all women are nesters, why do many of them not have kids? Conscious override of primitive processes. Just because we feel emotions or urges doesn't mean we need to act on them. Any time you think a fully functioning human woman is making a complex life decision because her ancient mammalian ancestors made nests is laughably naive. I think they're making very crude and simple decisions subconsciously, and then following suit or trying to rationalize consciously. The nesting part was just an an…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 11:15 PM
-1

How so on the more subtle and taking months or years? There's short term attraction (up to 2 months) and long term attraction (after 2 months). Short term is very volatile. Long term is not nearly as volatile. Most men have experienced the slow fade of interest in a long term relationship, which manifests as Indicators of Disinterest like more arguing, less intimacy, etc. While in the relationship, these things are more subtle, running under the surface. I guess I’m confused as to how what you’r…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 11:07 PM
2

I think this idea that women are just going for the next best option is ridiculous. That they’ll leave you because all of a sudden there’s a better provider in the picture. I don't see it like this. It's more subtle and usually takes months or even years. I can’t see many women initially going for someone shorter, less educated, makes less, and is quieter/shyer than them. Exactly. I think a natural response to that would be of course, why would she want to partner with someone who doesn’t have t…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 10:23 PM
0

My understanding is women stay with men short, medium, or long after attraction is gone because they are "nesters" by nature. From my experience and those I know this period is filled with lots of arguing, nagging, less intimacy, and more chance of them cheating. Eventually in that period they build up enough conscious resentment to break free for good. Very few women are jumping from husband to husband trying to level up like Donkey Kong. Agreed. But men better be ready for the pain and confusi…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 10:19 PM
1

Monkey Branching could be used for either male/female IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 09:33 PM
1

Appreciate the clarification. My response is the first source only suggests that the relationship will likely be more negatively affected, which I've already agreed to in my first response to you above. I can't get the second link to pull up. I'm talking about the men that women choose to stay with, due to chemical attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:59 PM
1

I only found this when searching from the Pew Research Center. "National data shows that the median wait time to remarry is about 3.4 years for women and 3.7 years for men. Only a tiny fraction remarry in the first 12 months, though roughly two-thirds of divorced adults eventually remarry. " Where did you find the 60/20 stats?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:54 PM
0

I have to ask, you mentioned data. Which data are you referring to?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:41 PM
2

You're right. Women have different preferences due to outward appearance, style, etc. I'll admit, I'm speaking in generalities here. Women are going to generally be more attracted to men with high marks in the categories I listed above. Women universally have an attraction level that follows the same trend. That doesn't mean a man with high marks in the categories above can get any woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:36 PM
0

When men experience this, it’s because women are evil and superficial for liking someone else Not to me it's not. It's that the man isn't strong enough via the inner qualities I listed in the post. That's why they leave. Plain and simple.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:31 PM
3

For sure. That exact scenario happened to me with my first fiancee. And yes, a man could do it as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:30 PM
2

Absolutely not. Also, to me "attraction" in it's truest form is neither moral or immoral. It's a subconscious response to perceived strength.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:28 PM
0

Do women prefer men who have their lives together? Yes of course. Agreed. I refer back to the qualities I listed above as examples for them having their life together. Will women leave their partners if they turn out to be manchildren who can’t use a vacuum cleaner and can’t hold down a job? Also yes, probably. Also agreed. In this scenario a man would be too "needy" and that's not attractive and the antonym of Independent.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:27 PM
2

Isn't monkey branching when she is afraid to leave the relationship until she has secured someone else? Yes this is my understanding as well. I don't see attraction to be the major factor in those cases. She is no longer interested in her current BF and is looking for plan B. Ah. Ok to me interest and attraction are interchangeable, with attraction being potentially a more precise indicator. To restate, there's a vacuum of interest/attraction in their current partner that is being filled by anot…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:23 PM
3

From my understanding Monkey Branching is securing a new partner before they've left their current partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:20 PM
0

I'd consider the terms at least partially true. They're just different words to conceptualize what's going on with relationships from the RP perspective. I've had several women in past relationships leave me for someone else or already have someone else lined up before breaking up with me. I know quite a few other men that have experienced the same as well. Could a man do that as well? Yes. But I do think it happens more often with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 07:53 PM
-1

I certainly agree that issues like you mentioned such as trauma, abuse, etc affect relationships, often negatively. I also believe the concept of attraction level is more influential than those things, and unfortunately I think sometimes those issues you mentioned are referenced unintentionally from those that simply have low attraction. (If they have those issues and high attraction, they still would want to be with you)
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 07:42 PM
1

Trying to get a woman to like you is a waste of time. If you mean contemporary dating issues like putting them on a pedestal, overly neediness and approval, or any other rom-com type activities, then yes, I totally agree. However IMO men should absolutely focus on self-improvement both outer and inner appearance in order to attract a better partner. Personal examples: I was a scrawny dork in my teens and early twenties and couldn't get the type of women I wanted, so I spent six months completely…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 03:14 PM
1

Indeed These traits you list men value in women I propose women also value in men. I know I would not be drawn to the opposite. You bring up a great point here and it'd be hard for me to disagree. A big part of this to me is we're doing our best to use our language capabilities to understand and describe the "appeal". There's most definitely overlap. For example confidence and charisma, or ambition and status, etc. For your last three paragraphs, it's a balancing act for sure. No partner should …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 03:46 PM
1

These are the questions that need to be examined more so thank you. There is another reddit post that included discussions in the comments that if traits like courage and emotional stability were considered masculine, then are the opposites considered feminine? I'd replied in another comment on here that a few of the opposites of these qualities are lazy, cowardly, insecure, boring, needy, and "dead beat". To a woman's deeper attraction these register as weakness. I don't think these opposites n…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 03:02 AM
5

I largely agree. It's hard to get past one's ego and various levels of delusion. I'd add that this could be true for both men and women. Are they trying different things to see if it works better? Are they taking responsibility for their own success or in this case failure? Are they spending many hours researching dating and relationship strategies? Most likely "no" to any of those. I’m reasonable, I’m misunderstood, and everyone criticizing me is unfair, sexist, dishonest, or cruel. Incel 101 u…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 09:47 PM
1

For sure. I do think there are some "Red Pill" men and women that believe similar to me, but they're just outnumbered and out voiced by the women haters. I'm going to keep working on finding that area to differentiate. I appreciate your input.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:49 AM
1

That is the essential question yes and you're right on it's about how it's used. In Red Pill terms, a rebrand a away from "Just lift bro", which I do feel can be beneficial in multiple ways, to a more inner strength centered understanding. "Frame" for example to me is very similar to the concept of "Composure." The outer physical is just the tip of the iceberg for attraction. I want it to be understood more clearly, and whatever term gets that point across I'm game. This post was meant to test t…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:43 AM
1

And just wanting to clarify, you don't believe the term "alpha male" needs adjusting? Preferred carries a similar meaning?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:31 AM
1

All the trusts you mentioned are good traits to have, I don’t see why anyone would have a problem with them… Same here, especially when comparing them to the traditional hyper dominate/aggressive definition of "Alpha." I also don’t think these traits represent the kind of men who are actively and popularly talking about women non stop Meaning the outspoken men that hate women?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:22 AM
1

I largely agree on all of this, especially to keep dating your GF/wife and not becoming complacent.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:55 AM
1

I just don't really agree that such an outcome is feasible for a sizeable population of men or women. Maybe. I do hope that someday people understand this subject better and the world would be a better place because of it. I appreciate your respectful responses.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:44 PM
1

Ok well, to me the kayfabe is unfortunately more of the "blue pill" ideology. Disregarding our primitive instincts. There's a reason Red Pill and even PUA communities are sticking around... it's because there's some truth in the psychology that they present. If it didn't work at all, men would have abandoned it long ago. I for one love women, and feel there's no need for manipulation in attracting them, so that incurs quite a bit of misunderstanding when debating on posts like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:17 PM
1

Yeah Harrison Ford... high marks in just about all the qualities I listed. Nothing against Hayden Christensen, but IMO his interactions with Padme on screen were unnatural and it wouldn't have worked out IRL even to the point of dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:07 PM
1

But then if I'm wrong it'll be awkward lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:02 PM
1

Yes, could you elaborate on the "specific genre of American online content." What is the specific genre? What are it's parts? What are it's characteristics?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:38 PM
1

In my mind I'm agreeing with you, especially on the kayfabe, but then also wondering if we're thinking the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:35 PM
1

Yeah I've gotten that take before. How about: 100lb nerd attracts desirable woman because he is ambitious and sets boundaries? Still Red Pill or no?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:32 PM
1

Fair point so I added "anecdotal" to the post in that part.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:29 PM
2

Sorry I don't know how to respond to this. Could you elaborate?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:26 PM
1

"Pro social" meaning not as aggressive/dominant?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:24 PM
1

Twenty years in a relationship doesn't mean you understand women as a class. That's a nonsense response. Being married to one woman for twenty years doesn't establish that you understand some supposedly universal subconscious process governing female mate selection. I've also been very unsuccessful at getting women long ago due to having similar beliefs as you, then after quite a few mistakes and learning attracted multiple sought after partners before this one. And no, you empirically don't und…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 08:04 PM
1

Ah yes. You've seen some Shht... What bugs you the most? People saying one thing and doing another?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 06:48 PM
2

This is so weird. It reads like you’ve never actually had relationships with women and instead learned human behavior from pop evolutionary psychology. Sorry that it reads that way. I've had many years of successful romantic interactions with women, currently on year 20 of amazing relationship. And the funniest part is that the “alpha” framework you’re replacing with “preferred male” isn’t even an accurate description of wolves or primates. These are often close-knit social and family groups wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 06:46 PM
1

Philosopher?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 06:32 PM
2

Reminds me of this... OK I'll go back and respond.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 06:30 PM
0

Justin Bieber Of all time... Don't think so. Internet search agrees.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 06:16 PM
2

Sorry but it seems your position is based a bit too much in the "emotionally charged" realm and not in a practical/realistic one. Therefore I don't know how to respond differently than I already have to you and have via many other replies I've given on this post.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:58 PM
1

So, in your opinion, it's not that they're somewhere along the scale of these qualities, it's just something else entirely? I mean... sense of humor that you mentioned is Charisma to me... but ok you chose your boyfriend because you complete each others sentences and have the same interests. Those are valuable LTR qualities to have. Anything else?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:52 PM
0

Han Solo is a personal favorite. There's a reason the on and off camera chemistry was so good... Vs. Anakin and Padme = hard to watch.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:47 PM
1

I would counter that most dead bedroom marriages are because her attraction level is low enough that's she's now repulsed by him. Not physically, but emotionally. And yes, these inner traits could be considered "masculine" IMO. Will have to do a separate post on Hypergamy vs. Attraction level.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:46 PM
1

So... following that train of thought, your friends that are in happy relationships are with lazy, cowardly, insecure, boring, needy, "dead beat" people?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:42 PM
2

Does not mean this is going to attract every woman in the world Absolutely not, you are correct. However maximizing these inner strength traits (as well as outer ones) will be a HUGE improvement for most men in their dating success. Better understanding attraction and improving one's romantic odds isn't "facetious" at all to me. It's genuine if that's what they want, and many do.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:38 PM
0

I think we may be getting too much in the personal realm. Earlier you said, Well my observations, as well as the observations of thousands of other humans say otherwise. I'm curious as to what are those specific observations, so that I understand your stance?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:33 PM
3

Oh it's definitely not getting me or others nowhere. It's gotten me 3 amazing relationships over 25 years. It's gotten others I've worked with many years of amazing relationships as well. Sorry but to me this is like saying, "F science and discovery" and I can't agree with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:26 PM
1

The important biological signal is probably security, competence and experience. Agreed. These are key factors to their attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:22 PM
0

Nerds can be ambitious. Nerds can be confident. Nerds can be composed. Etc. It's about inner strength. I was once a huge dork long ago, and looking back there were (a few) women that still wanted to date me regardless. They preferred me because of one or more of the inner qualities I've listed. You're attracted to your boyfriend because of one or more of these qualities. And if you ever break up, it'll be because he's lacking one ore more of these qualities. In LTR's, it's usually it's treating …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:17 PM
1

I'd counter that they choose looks, then attitude, loyalty, and youthfulness.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:08 PM
0

"Echo chamber" yes, I know what that means. Not wanting to get off topic but I'm in the middle somewhere. I can pull up CNN and show you the bias and I can show up FOX News and show you the bias. Well my observations, as well as the observations of thousands of other humans say otherwise. As kindly and gently as possible... are those humans having success, or are they continually having issues and confusions. Because, and I don't know how to do this without coming off as arrogant... I'm happy wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:05 PM
1

So does "it's the will of God," Fair point. For obvious reasons, sometimes a complete explanation doesn't necessarily reflect reality. Yes. But then sometimes it does. I'm curious as to your stance on this topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:01 PM
-4

My evidence is yes, my own experience, plus thousands of observations of other humans, online and offline.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:56 PM
2

Your first paragraph is an attack. Paragraphs 2-4 either agree with what I'm saying via animal/human cooperation or also agree with what I'm saying via pointing out that it's not about physical aggression. I agree with your paragraph 5. For paragraph 6, no we don't live in the Paleolithic Era, but the mate selection process is indeed still there IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:54 PM
1

Many years of personal experience, observations, and intuition. It completely explains "why are women so confusing?!?"
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:49 PM
1

Popular would be another relevant descriptor IMO yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:45 PM
1

Is that preference natural or manufactured? I believe their preference to be natural, a process of the subconscious. Innate.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:44 PM
2

Ah yes! That's a good group as well!
/r/ExRedPill14/05/24 11:29 PM
2

It's very natural to get frustrated when realizing this. The amazing news is you or any other guy can do it without all the asshole-ness. (Source - reformed jerk) My list of the inner strengths includes Ambition, Courage, Confidence, Charisma, Compassion, Composure, and Self-Esteem. Most Jerks and Assholes simply display more of the sum total of these than "nice guys." That's why they get more attention from women. Learn to use playful banter, etc. Watch Charisma on Command YT vids. Experiment i…
/r/ExRedPill14/05/24 06:44 PM
2

Solid list! IMO #7 is the most lacking for the nice guys.
/r/ExRedPill14/05/24 06:36 PM
2

It’s so much more about how you present yourself (appearance and personality). Appearance isn’t nearly as important as many think. Ambition Status Courage Confidence Charisma Composure Self Esteem Rate yourself on these categories. For most men I’d say it’s lacking charisma and/or being too needy (part of composure).
/r/seduction11/09/23 01:32 AM
2

It reminds me of this https://youtu.be/5pftxSfWH3s (skip to 0:35) Funny stuff! I think if it were me I would have just kept running past her towards the train yelling "come on!" just to save face... I've been down those corridors and it's creepy in the middle of the day, can't imagine at 2AM. Now, as far at the OP's question. I have a confession. I never "cold approached." I always just made the most out of the interactions with girls at work, school, and social circles and that was plenty for m…
/r/seduction02/07/17 12:59 PM
5

Women have morals. But feelings aren't moral. Feelings win.
/r/TheRedPill25/06/17 09:39 PM
4

Okay, so I'm not going crazy. A golden booger. Don't see that every day.
/r/seduction21/06/17 07:14 PM
3

Dale figured a lot out about human nature. How To Win Friends And Influence People is a must read for those looking for deeper meanings into why we act like we do.
/r/TheRedPill20/06/17 06:36 PM
1

The thought of nonexistence, of everything I've ever known or done to be sliver between an infinite oblivion is....too much. It's strange, but I've noticed as one gets older, and if they set goals and focus on growth, it get's easier. Neil deGrasse Tyson makes some excellent points here
/r/TheRedPill16/06/17 07:47 PM
0

Sounds like they just weren't interested. And admire the gumption but it's an uphill battle when you're chasing older women at 18, as most are looking for older men. Sometimes there's just not a lot to work with, so there's no use beating your head against the wall trying to force the interest that isn't there.
/r/TheRedPill15/06/17 07:43 PM
1

Great post! The older I get, the less afraid I am of dying, and the more afraid I am of not truly living... My current goal is to improve effectiveness by getting an early start on house maintenance each day (usually by 7:30AM) Working with my hands and improving my surroundings helps morale and gets the blood flowing. Then shift gears around 9AM and work business for a few hours. I've found that a solid productive 4 hours of work before lunch makes my day go A WHOLE LOT better. And if I'm lazy …
/r/TheRedPill15/06/17 07:36 PM
3

No wonder online dating is almost impossible for most men Indeed. Just as with other animals, males are the approachers and females are the acceptor/rejectors. And in the online meat market, the phenomenon is exaggerated even more. So what is a guy to do? Up your game A LOT with your photos/profile info. Find apps that have better women to men ratios. Meet women in person and in social situations.
/r/TheRedPill15/06/17 07:27 PM
2

Great post and keep up the mental fortitude! Because they like being better than you. And they don't like feeling inferior deep down. The real question is this, do they know what they're doing or is it all subconscious?? We are compelled by our subconscious desires/emotions. Some of us just have better filters and a better understanding than others ;) jealousy/envy is a disease. Yep. The more jealousy, the more insecurity. You're better than them for maintaining your frame. Keep it up!
/r/TheRedPill15/06/17 04:25 PM
1

Thanks for your response, Coach. Subscribed to your subreddit for what it's worth. You're welcome and thanks for subscribing. Looking forward to getting some deeper discussions going over there. And yet my cousin's boyfriend has no ambitions and works a dead-end job, but has a funny personality and has been able to maintain a relationship. Good observation. Think of the "strength" qualities as a report card. The more you have, the better you do. The cousin's boyfriend is doing well in confidence…
/r/seduction13/06/17 04:39 PM
5

when I don't give a fuck, they get upset like I don't care. The sooner you learn that women can be upset, yet still want to be with you (more), the better ;) Them being upset with you is not directly correlated to their deep down desire to mate with you, and it depends on what they're upset about. It comes back to frame, and much of what's going on is subliminal. The more relaxed and in control of yourself and your emotions you are, the better. Women naturally gravitate towards the feeling of se…
/r/TheRedPill11/06/17 02:21 PM
25

Alright... I want you to ponder this. What if being "controlling" is just another manifestation of being insecure? The Alpha response is actually therefore to "not give a F." When you feel the need to control something, you've already lost. Alpha is more than macho man controlling tactics. It's strength through and through. Example 1: My first LTR. Fiance's interest in me was waning and she started interacting with old fling again. I got jealous. I wanted to control her and keep her away from hi…
/r/TheRedPill10/06/17 06:46 PM
2

As a single male in his late 20's am I starting to get close to or passed my use by date in terms of attracting a quality partner? Hell no! Just keeps getting better if you take care of yourself and have a purpose. But I can't help but have thoughts in the back of my head that my time is running out. Nooooooo. Upward spiral buddy. I really enjoy my lifestyle at the moment and the freedom I have but I do eventually want to do the whole wife and kids thing. 42 years old. 10 years with hot wife. 3 …
/r/TheRedPill10/06/17 06:28 PM
1

you got any tips? You know, it's not easy, or everyone would be doing it. My advice would be to watch others that have charisma (lot's of forms) and how they make it work for them. Most wouldn't believe it, but guys like David Letterman and Jerry Seinfeld did very well with attractive women. Be someone who can laugh at themselves but still have self respect. If you have a sense of humor, and work to understand human nature, it's easy peasy. Not everyone is going to connect, and that's A-OK.
/r/seduction10/06/17 06:21 PM
3

I've read Models, Good! One of the better books out there. and yet there is something that I just can't come to terms with, and that is the nature of attraction. Well, you could join us over at r/ScienceOfDating Just the idea that a woman can leave you at the instant you lose even the slightest faith in yourself doesn't at all put me at ease. It's not quite that abrupt. Women have interest level that is linear. The longer you've been together and the higher their interest, the more runway you ha…
/r/seduction10/06/17 12:38 AM
2

but I always get dudes asking me "You wanna fight brah? Hang out with some different dudes. European AMOGs use a fucking Kamikaze tactic. Okay... I'm intrigued. Play by play please.
/r/seduction10/06/17 12:28 AM
3

"What winks and screws like a tiger?" [wink] Use at your own risk/reward. Didn't ever use pick up lines actually. Just talked to them confidently and made them laugh. Also didn't PU. But have done my fair share of seducing.
/r/seduction10/06/17 12:24 AM
2

So in the animal kingdom, the risk is not surviving for the leader or the lead, due to poor decisions or from clashes with a competing faction or intra faction alpha "wannabe." People can be a bit more "civilized," and the good news is there is more benefits of being "Alpha" with less fuss/risk for humans much of the time.
/r/TheRedPill09/06/17 03:04 PM
1

Sounds like college... Lot's of Rob's out there unfortunately. AWALT She's never yours, it's just your turn. Agree completely on the AWALT at the deepest level, other than potential genetic mutations... but say Rob was instead Alpha and knew how to maintain her interest, wouldn't it be his turn therefore for quite a while?
/r/TheRedPill09/06/17 02:20 PM
4

Excellent thought provoking post with I believe a lot of truth. Have you ever been in the situation where a social group is entered by an individual whose energy, charisma and personality seem irresistible? everyone turns to him, everyone laughs at his jokes, everyone seems to try to please him, sometimes even despite themselves. They may dislike the guy for one reason or another, he may represent a type of person they'd normally hate to be associated with, but they can't resist him nonetheless.…
/r/TheRedPill09/06/17 02:08 PM
1

The older guy theory is not negated in any society. And I keep hearing the "Western Women" argument... All women at the deepest level, the one that controls who they choose and stay with, are the same. All women gravitate towards men with specific "Alpha" strength qualities. They are Status, Ambition, Confidence, Charisma, Challenge, and Self-Control. EDIT: And yes, there are physical traits women gravitate towards- Physique, Hygiene, Attire, Health/Vigor. Most men just overestimate those and un…
/r/TheRedPill08/06/17 02:46 PM
1

"Rate my opener?" "So, if I see a cute girl am i meant to talk to her? Too predictable. Girls can sniff that stuff out from a mile away. " Ok looks like im doing the right thing, if i talk to a cute girl should I also give them a compliment?" Waaay to much asking for permission/coming from a submissive frame. First, it's so much more about body language and sub-communication than what you actually say. Second, really try to look at it from the mindset of the girl, who has likely been intermitten…
/r/seduction07/06/17 07:36 PM
1

A couple years ago when I started to pay attention to the way I dressed, I realized most guys wear the same boring jeans and T-Shirt 99% of the time. Great observation! A simple shave, haircut, and wardrobe update puts you a cut above the rest, and it doesn't even have to be expensive, just wear a nice shirt Exactly. Made a huge difference for me too. Women gravitate towards men that stand out from the pack. If you enjoy discussing the psychology of women, and what makes them choose one man over…
/r/seduction07/06/17 06:14 PM
5

Some thoughts: Against my better judgement, during a night out I confronted her about the situation, as she'd been very stand-offish. As you are realizing now, this never works. Confronting a woman about a perceived lack of interest accomplishes nothing, and effectively lowers her interest (and respect for you) more. However once we went on dates I got oneitis, lost my frame and she got bored. Very common affliction. You have to learn to be more of a challenge - she should be winning you over. W…
/r/TheRedPill07/06/17 02:46 PM
1

Link or it didn't happen :) Either way, yes, even skin care is a potential gold mine of suitable women. Guys need to realize that the bar is so low in any of these female dominated interests, that all you have to do is express the tiniest bit of understanding into what they're doing and you've got an intrigue frenzy on your hands. And women compete over men.
/r/seduction07/06/17 02:06 PM
1

Sure, body building can be a hobby, and the only one I know of with roided out femme fatales.
/r/seduction07/06/17 01:01 AM
12

I disagree, typically what girls are doing isn't masculine, and to women, being and doing masculine things is attractive. Girls do a lot more male heavy hobbies than vice versa. As other posters have mentioned, dancing is one of the, if not the absolute best. Yoga is good. Maybe being masculine is a bit... misunderstood, and it's more about how you "frame" your interactions in whatever hobby it is. Just like men are typically not attracted to roided out femme fatales. I know I'm not. However tha…
/r/seduction07/06/17 12:25 AM
1

Here's my take: My dad and grandfather were toothpick-arm ectomorphs. I as well was a toothpick armed... well actually toothpick legged ectomorph. So was Edward Norton. Before and After Ryan Reynolds has done it. Mark Wahlberg used to be a scrawny kid. Here's a whole bunch of ectomorphs that have become lean and mean The ectomorph frame has it's own advantages. You naturally have more endurance and are usually younger looking, and when you do put on muscle it looks more "ripped" due to a smaller…
/r/TheRedPill07/06/17 12:19 AM
1

It's one of the best. His concept of vulnerability is a bit dangerous as it can get men in the trap of coming off as weak and needy. Think of it more as taking calculated risks. Also check out Corey Wayne's How To Be A 3% Man and if you want the original, check out Doc Love.
/r/seduction06/06/17 07:45 PM
1

Well the most misunderstood and mishandled by men is the concept of challenge (indifference and aloofness) versus being to needy/available. Close second would be confidence and charisma.
/r/seduction06/06/17 07:34 PM
2

Yes of course everybody can build some muscle but then you can't change your frame much. Are you and endomorph or ectomoprh? If you're a skinny bean pole it's all about grams of carbs/protein and the right workout. If you're an endomorph you're going to have to do a bunch of cardio. I try to be understanding when I hear someone say the "bad genes" argument, but from someone who was a 138 pounder soaking wet with severe acne until he was 22, and then decided to work his ass of to get what he want…
/r/TheRedPill06/06/17 07:34 PM
77

What hobbies attract the most girls? The hobbies with the most girls in them. Simple supply and demand.
/r/seduction06/06/17 07:10 PM
1

(e.g. one can go to the gym all he wants but if that person doesn't have the ability to build much muscle then he's hopeless) Can you be more specific on why someone wouldn't be able to build muscle? Many times it seems it's more a matter of how much you want something, and that may in fact be chemical (hormonal). But if you have desire, then it can most definitely be done.
/r/TheRedPill06/06/17 07:02 PM
1

They definitely accentuate it. So without the prevalence of swipe dating and the bar scene, you're saying people wouldn't fixate on the physical? If so explain please.
/r/TheRedPill06/06/17 06:06 PM
2

Well theoretically you could always be the highest - or one of the highest - SMV males in her life, and naturally she will never leave you. ^ This. ^ And SMV is a much misunderstood concept. Too many men unfortunately fixate on the physical aspects. Alternatively, you could find someone who has enough willpower and discipline to hold herself accountable to commitments that are in contrast of her biological desires - then theoretically she would be faithful for better or worse. But it is extremel…
/r/TheRedPill06/06/17 03:12 PM
1

I like to think along the lines of relationships, are at their root about creating children. In that all the good feelings and desire of attraction correlate to being with someone who's a fit candidate to be a mother/father. Indeed. Great point about affection as well. To add to that, men that are looking for LTR should be assessing elements of her attitude, whether or not she's a flexible giver, and if she's a competent human being. All of which get back to the survival aspects of our primal wi…
/r/TheRedPill06/06/17 02:59 PM
-2

It because you're being a challenge. It has to do with their deep down "lizard brain." EDIT: Irony Is: A community built on seduction techniques, those which directly deal with the deepest, most primitive parts of a woman's brain and "feelings", and still not having a F'ing clue as to what really drives women's actions. Weird. Wild. Stuff.
/r/seduction01/11/16 07:51 PM
0

I can see how a lack of knowledge would incline you to feel that way.
/r/seduction01/11/16 12:02 PM
1

Agreed. And admittedly, most guys go to the non-confrontational "boring" and "pleasing" side of the equation way too much usually, so you have to be careful.
/r/seduction31/10/16 09:29 PM
1

No no no. One is establishing interest, "you", one is creepy (house), and one is ahead in the feelings department, "I love you" and yes, those last two are definitely bad. You seem pretty smart from your other posts. You should probably read some of my other stuff.
/r/seduction31/10/16 09:00 PM
1

Playful teasing is great. I guess that means "rapport breaks" or similar correct? So what if She was interested, knew that you liked her and yet you pulled back, were aloof, a challenge. How do you think that would play out?
/r/seduction31/10/16 08:43 PM
-2

So to clarify, you think being direct with a woman that's checking for interest is "beta", and trying to get women to make the first move, which largely goes against nature, is... "alpha?"
/r/seduction31/10/16 08:26 PM
-1

No need to make a very easy situation hard. Sure all guys would like the girls to "make the first move." Because they're scared/afraid of rejection. Don't do this. Just reply to the question "you." Or if you insist on being romantic, "girls like you, that..." (describe 3 desirable and relevant NON PHYSICAL qualities here) Observe how she reacts, and then... Well, PM me for more. Good luck!
/r/seduction31/10/16 03:11 PM
1

Well the good news is, the further into the relationship you make it, the more you can be yourself. First 2 months is hardest, than after 6 months you can be more, and so on. Still have to utilize strength qualities though. I'm writing a series of books currently that will explain it in more detail.
/r/seduction26/10/16 02:14 AM
1

Anti-challenge is being too available (technology or in person), being overly accommodating, saying, doing, giving too early. Anti-challenge turns the warm and fuzzy feelings off, challenge turns them on. When they get low enough - no coming back...
/r/seduction25/10/16 02:24 PM
1

It's part of the game. It works best after physical affection has been accepted. If you need a moral reason for doing it, just consider it taking it slow so that y'all don't screw up the courtship.
/r/seduction25/10/16 02:19 PM
1

Oh it makes complete sense. You CAN be direct, just spoon feed them the information. Be aloof (hold back/take it slow) after you know they like you, then you'll see the power of challenge.
/r/seduction25/10/16 02:04 AM
1

It's because you're being too available/anti challenge. You said the truth yourself in your post title.
/r/seduction24/10/16 09:54 PM
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