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ComteDeBetamax Archive

View 1 post and 74 comments by ComteDeBetamax on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
9

ComteDeBetamax/r/askMRP15/06/19 10:25 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. My first response would be to start dropping ultimatums...but I think I need to try other approaches to lead us out of this. I agree with your advice that it will be taken as inflammatory, and provoke the opposite response I need.
/r/askMRP09/07/19 07:57 PM
3

Thanks for the good wishes. It really helped me consolidate my thoughts and see my weakness by running through this dumpster fire. I'm in a better place for having done it.
/r/askMRP20/06/19 02:25 AM
3

UPDATE 2: Thank you, sincerely, to all who have taken time to weigh in. Mods banned me, work called, but I’m not going anywhere... There is A LOT of valuable input here from a lot of voices that I have processed and appreciate. ----------------------------------------------------- <rant> I originally made this post after coming up with a MISSION and a PLAN that I’m 2 months into: As prescribed, I work through 12 months of MRP, improving me, escalating dread and THEN see if I have a marriage or n…
/r/askMRP19/06/19 08:30 PM
1

No he did not. That is clearly something I magically thought, and will need to get clarification on.
/r/askMRP17/06/19 01:09 PM
1

The obvious thing is to remove the money ASAP. I've been counselled NOT to do that by my attorney, or face serious reprisal from any divorce judge in the future. My time and attention seem to have no value to her except sporadically. ​ I seem to have 3 options going forward: 1) Controlled rage. She will understand I'm serious, but toothless. 2) Increase my value to her.... This is the right answer in my heart. Put in the 12 months work needed. Then make a decision on whether it's livable or not.…
/r/askMRP17/06/19 01:45 AM
1

Last clarification. I actually want to move to the city and leave my current job ASAP. I just want to secure a job first that doesn't hose me for the next 10 years (non-competes and such) and I have a 12 month wind down in my contract. She is coercing this onto her own timeline for several of her own reasons: For several years she talked about it, and I ignored her, until her pleading escalated. Then I started looking, and nothing happened. Finally, she gave me an ultimatum..... And when I looke…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 11:43 PM
-2

I WANT to move to the city. I just want to secure a reasonable job before doing so, and I don't have one yet. And I don't want to be coerced into settling for a bad decision I have to wake up to every day for the next decade... I want to be near culture and people again, and I want the kids to grow up in that as well. Her desires align with mine in that regard. Our expectations on the timeline don't...she wants it now.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 11:34 PM
1

Also, part of what some of you are calling me out on is for holding onto some "fantasy" of what could be. The reality is that I was petrified of my wife's emotions in the past for whatever reason. Working through MRP the last few months, now I DNGAF about them. And I have seen that it truly is no different than a crying 3 year old. She bitches and whines and huffs and puffs....and then she gets distracted by a shiny object and everything is fine. The part of me that sees this, knows that all the…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 11:17 PM
0

UPDATE: (Thank you to all who have weighed in. I'm very grateful to be challenged as I fumble my way through this by myself.) ​ I met with my attorney today. (They are also a family member, so there may be bias. But, also the best divorce attorney around here.) ​ He said that he would "crucify me" in front of the judge if he were the other party's attorney and saw that I did anything to restrict her access to the money. Because the amount I'm trying to restrict is much less than the 50% she's "e…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 11:02 PM
1

I'm appreciative of your input and for challenging my thinking. Not claiming I'm right or wrong, but thanks for taking the time.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 03:23 AM
0

No nuclear bombs. No more beta buxx...Turn off the spigot. Emphasize my desire to have the family whole again and have her as a leading part in my life (which I think is what she genuinely wants - see comments above) ​ But at the end of the day, it's still the MRP plan. Fix ME and improve my shortcomings. She will follow my lead...or not.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 03:17 AM
-3

Religion is irrelevant at this point. It's not holding me back. ​ I want to salvage this, or fail trying. ​ To be honest, the dialog below has helped me understand that some of her bahavior may have been an escape from me.... I think she is sexually attracted to me. I don't think she ever wants to divorce me. I also think I had no fucking clue how to handle her spoiled bitchiness in the past, and I passive-aggressively used to avoid her and not want to have sex with her. That meant I threw mysel…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 03:05 AM
1

And in retrospect, I used to avoid her a lot (passive-aggressive) when I didn't know how to handle dealing with her. I can envision an honest scenario here where she wanted more, but I wasn't really around/didn't want to be around her, and worked a lot/engaged in other things. Sort of a lonely housewife....who doesn't cheat. So, rather than divorce (which she does not do), maybe she extricated herself to resolve some of that conflict...and cheated with a horse.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 02:48 AM
1

More like she doesn't need anything else if she has unfettered access to it... slippery slope.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 02:43 AM
1

It's the first time she's outright deceived me (that I know of) in 9 years. ​ I'm sure she's going to justify it based on me recently lying/misleading her about going to the red pill conference I went to. I owned it and told her it was a mistake. But, I bet she's rationalizing a tit for tat here. We'll find out tomorrow.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 02:37 AM
0

It's good to reflect on this a bit more. Prior to our current shitshow, my wife used to complain about not having sex frequently enough. She wanted more. The real issue was that as a spineless simp, and I would shut down sexually when she was nagging and cunty (which she was a lot because I didn't know how to handle it). Essentially, I had low libido around her because of this. It wasn't until very recently that things got much worse and I started seeing denials outright. She's never been totall…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 02:30 AM
0

OP, with the excess income you have coming in, you could far more quickly than most build passive cash flow that lets your next wife have a horse (to me, current wife is a goner). Yes, you are correct. That has been our fundamental financial fight. Invest VS Spend. And I've failed to lead and let the kids have their run of the candy store... ​ EDIT: ....The more I think about this, the more I like it. I put a cap on it now, but she can do horse stuff in the future in proportion to passive income…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 02:15 AM
2

Let's cut through the bullshit.... There are two paths forward here: Fix shit and make progress Give up and blow it up You seem fixated on #1. EDIT: I meant #2. ​ You brought up great points about being held back by fear and I've stated those fears (Divorce, Kids) above. ​ If I can't FIX SHIT because I'm AFRAID OF THE CONSEQUENCES, then I should just give up and blow up the marriage. In the meantime, I've got a lot to gain by having a functioning family with two young kids and a wife who used to…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 02:12 AM
1

Thanks for the constructive feedback. I am speaking to the attorney tomorrow. I understand the need to STFU if I'm pursuing divorce. ​ But I'm not pursuing divorce yet. And I have to talk about the boundaries to enforce them, so after thinking about it, I'm going to only talk about the financial boundary right now until we fix it. If she complies, then we move on to the living situation boundary. If not, then I don't have a marriage....and I STFU and work with the attorney.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:46 AM
1

If the rules were never posted or discussed? And the nurse just kept demanding a pay raise and we kept giving it to her? ​ More like shitty management. And you don't fire her without fixing your own shit and making clear the expectations. If she can't live with the new rule set/arrangement, you fire her. ​ So here I am, trying to enforce boundaries and expectations.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:41 AM
0

Not mine. And not anyone else's... I've never really had to worry about that. It's weird. She wouldn't give you or anybody else the time of day. The only time I've seen her gravitate toward men, is toward beta simps who flood her with attention....but I don't think she has sexual feelings for them, just emotional. (I guess that includes me too....)
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:39 AM
-1

This is the most constructive answer so far. Thank you. ​ I'm starting to see this in phases: First, we deal with the card and have her turn it over. Might take a few months for her to give in. Then we deal with the living under one roof issue...when her rent is up and I keep the keys to the new house. I hold the horse as my trump card and sell it if she fails 1 or 2. ​ After the first volley, she knows I'm serious and not going to blow over again. That makes the more serious secondary issue hav…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:36 AM
1

You're deeper into beta bux zone than I think we have ever seen here. I think this summarized my situation well. Good luck, but if my wife pulled this shit she would definitely be seeing my controlled anger I feel like I need to demonstrate control, but maybe O-renshi style is more appropriate....
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:32 AM
0

She has no reason to respect me. I've pissed and moaned and capitulated in everything she ever pushed for.... ​ ​ THSI IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE STOOD FAST AND HARD ON ANYTHING... It's on me I am calling an attorney tomorrow to ascertain if I'm in a weakened custody position by being a state away...I need to understand this further before doing anything drastic. I'm trying to find the deed to the horse so I can sell it if I choose to. I'm reaching out to an attorney to take control of the 2nd house…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:28 AM
0

she was earning 6 figures and only had to see you 2 days a week... It wasn't always like this. She was a pretty good wife in the beginning... If I take these monetary things away, I will have a LOT of value again....or I will be a manipulative, abuser (in her mind). ​ Believing she could be responsible with the horse was a mistake.
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:24 AM
1

My wife moved here for me and to gain a family she desperately wanted bc hers is shitty. Conflicts between my mom and sisters resulted in a falling out, and now she has no reason to be in this shitty little town other than me and my job and her friends. She always wanted to move back to the city at some point and we talked about that timeline in the beginning. Once I bought the horse, it became a bigger priority. She drove 4 hours a day 3x a week to ride and do lessons because there is no facili…
/r/askMRP16/06/19 01:15 AM
2

You're not wasting your time...this is incredibly helpful. And I'm up to the task. (I couldn't say that 2 months ago.) I had no INTERNAL frame and lived in total EXTERNAL expectations for a long time. I ignored what I wanted in life. So I blew in the wind, and only saw the options others placed before me. You're right that doctors (myself included) are about 10 years slower at maturing because we live in books and our heads for too long...so I'm a little slow to the party. ​ My primary fear was …
/r/askMRP16/06/19 12:54 AM
2

I'm a master boundary-maker, but one of my boundaries is my family lives with me, in my house and it has yet to be broken. By the end of my writing, I recognized that this is the fundamental issue I have to tackle. Might as well make it now... I guess I'm having the main event.
/r/askMRP15/06/19 10:56 PM
1

It’s just that I feel as though my “real self” detaches from my physical body in such a way that anything can happen to my body (get beat up or whatever) and my “true self" will still be safe. Sometimes (during extreme circumstances) I’ll see myself do something against my will Missed this earlier, but that is pretty consistent with some dissociative disorder (likely not full blown DID, but somewhere along that spectrum). Finding a label may not matter since even the shrinks can't agree on this …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/06/19 11:55 PM
1

My childhood is typically not something I dwell on -quite the opposite - although my therapist is encouraging me to do so. She believes that I’ll never find peace in my current relationships if I don’t confront my past and attain “closure.” So... typically I would subscribe to the philosophy that dwelling on past hurts and reliving those emotions is the bluepilled superhighway toward reaffirming victimhood and giving up your personal power. In your case, I don't think so... You should consider a…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/06/19 06:22 PM
1

What does she bring to your life that you put up with this? She's a good mother. Beyond this I struggle. I know there is potential for more, so I will reassess this in a year. ​ To me that’s the same as her duct taping you to a chair and forcing you to watch a bunch of dudes run a train on her. I've previously felt powerless in these issues...afraid to say no. But that stupidity is 100% on me. I was woefully unaware that I am the one who actually allows this shit to go on, and I am the one who c…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/06/19 12:29 AM
3

I haven’t written about this yet, but I tend to dissociate when I get stressed. (It’s not a bad experience - it’s actually kind of numbingly pleasant - but I don’t think it’s healthy.) This is not normal behavior 00Pi. I'm not a psychiatrist, but I've been exposed to a lot of stuff so I can give my 2c on this and you can see what sticks. ​ First of all, good on you for getting in here and working on you. But by now it's clear that your story is very different from the average story you are compa…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/06/19 12:19 AM
1

OYS #9 Flaccid Boundaries Stats: 45 6’4” 197 lbs 16%BF 1RM squat 200 lbs, 1RM DL 275 lbs, 1RM BP 205, 1RM OHP 140, Ring Dips (+20 lbs) 6 reps, Strict Pullups (+10 lbs) 10 reps Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, SGM, 16 CofP, SaLSM, Lots of Sidebar, Lots of OYS, WISNIFG, RM (50%), MAP (50%), Book of Pook, Current: Unchained Man Overview: I live 5 hours away from wife and kids while I work in the countryside. Caught some rest and feel a lot better. Wife got back from Europe. I had an opportunity to spend Saturda…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/06/19 12:20 PM
1

These are great thoughts. I hadn't really considered how much she didn't need what I have to offer.... Puts a different perspective on what I assume I'm bringing to the table. But if you're the codependent type, filled with convert contracts, needy for validation, and seething with your own passive aggressive anger, how are you possibly providing value to her? I definitely was these things. I see much less of it now with the exception of the last one (passive-aggressive). I don't think I'm actin…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/19 08:27 PM
1

Drop this bluepill victim narrative. Any abuse you're getting from her is because you've made yourself a willing "victim" in hopes of fulfilling your covert contracts. You have abused yourself with your covert contracts and Nice Guy behavior, and to adopt a helpless victim narrative is the antithesis of MRP. 100% agree. I should have explained my thinking in more detail about this. Other than learning about Nice Guy syndrome (NMMNG), the other major "epiphany" for me so far has been realizing th…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/19 02:54 AM
1

OYS #8 A Late Entry While Letting Go of the Disney Dream This week has been a mess. My wife went on a 12 day first class trip to Europe courtesy of her parents. I’ve worked 12 days straight including 5 days on call for holiday. I’m full time Mr. Mom with the 2 kids, incontinent dog, and enjoying being a single parent. Unfortunately, I’ve done nothing for myself and have not advanced a single thing for ME on my agenda. Stats: 45 6’4” 197 lbs 16%BF 1RM squat 200 lbs, 1RM DL 275 lbs, 1RM BP 205, 1R…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/06/19 11:44 PM
1

Thank you for spelling the "direct" approach out. It helps contrast against my behavior. Internally, I've gotten rid of butthurt and am OI pretty well. I visualize the turndown and have my plans in place beforehand so I've dealt with it internally already. BUT, when she suddenly starts escalates demands for shit and I don't say NO and then I passive-aggressively don't do what I said.....it comes off as butthurt. I recognize now that she vigorously escalates her demands as she senses me pulling a…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/19 06:17 PM
1

Solid feedback. Thank you. Part of this is me learning to trust the MRP process more and more. I am more appreciative of the work put in by the men before every day. I think I'm a few reps shy of making the changes you mentioned above second nature...
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/19 06:08 PM
1

This is passive-aggression Yep. I simply failed to say NO. Lesson learned. I found the texting advice helpful.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/19 03:21 AM
1

Are you against cheating? I gurantee you she's only doing because she knows 100% you won't cross that line I would see cheating a major break in my own moral frame. I lived a full single life before marriage and got everything I needed out of my system. However, I totally find it reasonable in the context of BPP's "failure to hold up the marriage contract" after moving through the levels of dread. I understand that as a reasonable reaction to someone else's failure rather than a moral frame brea…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/19 02:59 AM
1

You need to be more direct with your initiations. Not this soft back rubbing stuff, Rereading my wall of text, I can see how it comes off that way. I'm not usually a slow creeper.....but when she won't kiss, it's hard to heat up the engine. However, I think it's worth talking about this a bit as I only know my own behavior and opinions on this may really differ. Also cut the “only eye for you” BS and let dread work in your favor. I understand. I knew the question would come up and I consciously …
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/19 02:47 AM
1

If you hadn't deleted your older OYSs like the fragile-ego pussy that you are, I could have pointed out exactly how far you've come in terms of her respectful behavior and respect for your financial and other boundaries As I've learned more about this community, I understand the importance of those old posts to the next group of guys who come along. I've been planning to just edit and repost them for that benefit alone. By the way, I appreciate you taking an interest and providing guidance throu…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/19 02:30 AM
1

OYS #7 Welcome to MRP in real life Stats: 45 6’4” 197 lbs 16%BF 1RM squat 190 lbs, 1RM DL 265 lbs, Ring Dips (+20 lbs) 8 reps, Strict Pullups (+10 lbs) 10 reps, Handstand Pushups (3” from ground) 4 reps, Pushups (+55 lbs) 12 reps Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, SGM, 16 CofP, SaLSM, Lots of Sidebar, Lots of OYS, WISNIFG, RM (50%), MAP (50%), Book of Pook, Current: Unchained Man Overview: Wife and kids live in the city 5 hours away while I work in the countryside. Big work week for me with lots of late hours …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/19 06:18 PM
1

Got it. My annoyance is basically an unmet covert contract that I need to terminally extinguish.... ​ I'm pretty handsy with touch and affection normally. I will keep doing this, but I have to get rid of reciprosity expectations... I like this better than trying to just shut it down. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/19 06:18 PM
1

OYS #6 My Wife Is Just An Antenna Stats: 6’4” 195 lbs 15%BF 1RM squat 190 lbs, 1RM DL 265 lbs, Ring Dips (+20 lbs) 5 reps, Strict Pullups (+10 lbs) 8 reps, Handstand Pushups (3” from ground) 4 reps, Pushups (+55 lbs) 10 reps Life and all it’s demands are calling. I have pushed many things aside to carve out time for MRP, reading, and lifting. They are starting to push back. I feel disorganized and overwhelmed at times with the number of professional obligations I have and the little time left ov…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/19 12:00 PM
1

Interesting day... Whereas I thought I didn't handle the missing Mother's Day situation well, STFU actually worked in my favor. Despite her initial anger, she has been a total sweetheart today. I swear she has tied her shitty behavior to the shitty Mother's Day wishes....even though it was accidental on my part. Maybe STFU has greater power than I appreciated? (Or maybe her reading the RP playbook is helping tie the dots?)
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/19 01:23 AM
1

Great comments. Being half way is a pretty fragile place to be....and the inconsistency is a stench to be smelled half a mile away. As a minor tactical point, you mentioned that you assumed your wife/SIL traced you to the hotel through credit card statements. So what you're saying is that the woman who racked up 4800 bucks on the CC just to spite you, still has access to your online account? Yeah, no. Still figuring this out. I think now that they just cold called hotels and found my name. ​ I t…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/19 08:11 PM
1

Thank you for your thoughts. After doing more guy time and having it be a rewarding experience, I realize now that I've been trying to use my wife for the conversational/discussion pieces that I should be getting from other men... It's damn nice to just shoot the shit on a topic and use your brain from time to time....just never happens with the wives!
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/19 08:01 PM
1

That part of you is correct (Stop tolerating bullshit. Start showing controlled anger; and STFU and you), when you can do so within frame and congruently (Talking - why you shouldn't do it and why you sometimes should) Thank you for the links. It's still fuzzy, but I get it on some level... Raising kids is a long game; you can afford many months of parenting at a distance without greatly damaging your kids. This is where we are, and it is good information to internalize. I think a slow increment…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/19 07:51 PM
1

OYS #5 Bottling up Anger and Lifting Away the Gay Stats: 6’4” 195 lbs 15%BF 1RM squat 190 lbs, 1RM DL 250 lbs, Ring Dips (+15 lbs) 10 reps, Strict Pullups (+10 lbs) 8 reps, Handstand Pushups (4” from ground) 6 reps, Pushups (+55 lbs) 8 reps ​ Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, SGM, 16 CofP, SaLSM, Lots of Sidebar, Lots of OYS, WISNIFG, Book of Pook ​ I spent a week and a half traveling on the road. Had a nice contrast between two different conferences I attended and got to analyze male leaders and leadership f…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/19 01:18 PM
1

What is it about her reaction that you fear? Is it the 'upset mummy' archetype? Are you afraid that you would lose her over it? I will need to spend some time reflecting on this. Right now I think it is just an overall behavior pattern (habit) of avoidance of conflict and not wanting to deal with defending those conflicts with potential escalation....maybe because I've never developed the tools to handle escalation effectively. I am getting those tools now, though. WISNIFG. embrace the truth and…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/19 04:01 PM
2

The real question is, did you get any value out of the con. A definite yes. -I am anxious around other men and avoidant. Never realized this before until I found a group like this that I could relax with. I'm still trying to figure out what the discomfort is coming from.... fear of Judgement? Rejection? But why would I care from total strangers? It still doesn't make sense to me. -I need to build more support outside of my wife and family. ​ ​ I have to confess that I am still struggling with my…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/19 05:33 PM
1

OYS #4 Cross Country edition/ Making things worse Stats: 6’4” 195 lbs BF% 13 Lifts: on the road and don’t have my records handy. Hotels and random gyms. I reached my weight goal of 195 and stopped my cut. I will recalculate caloric needs. I need full energy again to deal with all the emotional flooding of this week. Wife: This week I was on the road for business, and I royally fucked up. I followed MRP advice to plan my life based upon what I need to do for me, and to keep fight club’s first rul…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/19 12:15 PM
1

The marriage sounds like a religious or minority ethnic thing. Those often lead to the dancing monkey attraction program. Not so much ethnic, as she just comes from a long line of abusive/controlling family. I think it is either anxiety or control with her. Not much middle ground. Add /u/weakandsensitive to your reddit friends list. Read his old posts and follow his comments. Will do. Thanks for the direction.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/19 11:02 PM
1

Your comment is very helpful. I need to shift my mindset from "punishing" to "securing" my boundary. That helps immensely in defining the defense strategy. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/19 01:15 PM
1

I believe there are a number of Visa prepaid cards which are "refillable", you might be able to give her a card effectively as cash where you refill it regularly. This is a great idea, especially if there is a way to track expenditures. That is the problem with going to cash...
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/19 01:00 PM
2

OYS #3 Stats: 6’4”, 197lbs, BF 14% (Navy method), 1RM squat 190 lbs, 1RM DL 250 lbs, Ring Dips (+10 lbs) 8 reps, Strict Pullups (+10 lbs) 8 reps, Handstand Pushups (4” from ground) 6 reps, Pushups (+45 lbs) 11 reps Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, SGM, 16 CofP, SaLSM, Lots of Sidebar, Lots of OYS Next: WISNIFG (90%), MAP (50%), Mystery Method Current situation: Driving 5 hours every weekend to see wife and kids in the city while I work in the country. Diet: Day 19 of cutting - 1500 cal/day (protein sparing).…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/19 12:29 PM
1

Great reference. Thanks for sharing
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/19 12:41 AM
1

Your analysis is quite helpful. What value does she add to your life and sense of fulfillment that you wouldn't get from her in a divorce? I'm struggling with this one. I mean, to listen to MRP the only value she has that I can't provide for myself is sex...but this would be the definition of every woman by that standard. At this point in our relationship, she does little for me, and requires a lot. However, she is a great mother to our kids and our values, worldviews, and aspirations are pretty…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 09:42 PM
1

Hard boundaries don't require being a nice guy and giving second chances. Message received.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 09:25 PM
1

OK, I interpreted this as a comfort test and tried to provide it. Historically, I have completely been the run to mommy and placate her bad mood guy in the past, so I can see how these things could overlap somewhat and be abused. I'm clearly a bit muddled on the distinction and will have to be more thoughtful on this point in the future. What you should have said to her question is: "I'm standing right here." and then smirk at her. Flip it. Who is the prize here. I get it. No problem with this.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 09:17 PM
1

Bullshit, you won't do shit. she walked right through your flaccid boundary and are still talking like it was an accident. I definitely think she did it with intent. I absolutely think she viewed it as a 'flaccid boundary'. After all, I've never set any hard boundaries on her before and she doesn't believe me. It's basically a shit test. If the money were infidelity, Unlike infidelity, there is precedent for these spending patterns that I have implicitly sanctioned in the past by just paying for…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 09:10 PM
1

Thank you for providing that link. The write up was immensely helpful when I read it previously. It's never to late to find your balls. I've been looking for my balls for most of my adult life.... I just never realized that they've been in my mommy's purse. For fuck's sake. What an eye opener this whole MRP thing has been on many levels: wife, work, parents. More than anything, I'm simply relieved to be taking back control of my life instead of being reactively buffeted by whatever cross-winds I…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 07:33 PM
1

Cut the credit card up, right in front of her. She will cry and get angry, give no fucks, you're chastizing a child. From now on she gets an envelope with cash and thats it. Thank you for the suggestion. I have been thinking about how I will escalate this if she is non-compliant, and I'm completely prepared to do what you suggest. The next level of fall back will be that the food for the kids will be spent by me and will be taken out of her envelope before I give it to her. What you should have …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 07:28 PM
1

Thank you for commenting. I am prepared to escalate as needed. I believe this initial expense was a fitness test of sorts and I need to maintain firm against it. The budget is on autopay so there is no negotiating. I'm prepared to move to cash envelopes and close her card if I need to. I made arrangements to control all the finances months ago before finding MRP. She usually delegates the finances to me anyway, but I opened up new accounts that are not jointly held and took away all her unfetter…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 07:22 PM
1

What helped me upon finding RP is to think through (like really really think through) the absolute worst case scenario that could happen. Thank you for sharing your experience. It helps to ground my thoughts in context. For better or worse, I sort of hit rock bottom before I discovered MRP. Meaning, I took the stoic approach and tried to embrace everything I was afraid of in advance and deal with it. It helped a lot. I'm past any anger/frustration now and am just energized to make positive chang…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 06:50 PM
1

Thank you for you thoughts and input. What does your lawyer say about your likely financial situation after the divorce is formalized? After talking to a close family member who is a divorce attorney, I believe she gets half . Based upon that discussion, I actually did a 2 month trial living on half my income to reduce my fear and found I could get by and continue saving to get ahead. Will your wife be entitled to significantly more that her current budget? Yes. Significantly more... The budget …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 06:00 PM
7

OYS #2 Stats: 6’4”, 199lbs, BF% ??, 1RM squat 190lbs, DL 230lbs, Ring Dips 12, Strict Pullups 12, HS Pushups getting closer, Pushups with 45lbs 8 reps Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, SGM, 16CofP. Next: MAP (50%), WISNIFG (75%) Current situation: Wife and kids live a state apart. Bouncing back from rock bottom in the relationship. I drive 5 hours most weekends to see them. Fitness: 3 months of weighted calisthenics this week. Ready to add weight to Ring Dips and Pullups. Push/Pull/Legs split is working well …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/19 12:43 PM
1

Thank you. mayor game...This one here? https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/4fv3rb/be_married_like_its_your_job_career_betabux_get/d2cs26v/
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/19 03:30 AM
2

Thanks. The context is going to matter at some point. Will do.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/19 01:52 AM
1

(Here is a short synopsis, minus the wall to text victim puke) Long Distance MRP Challenge: OYS #1 ver.2 Me: 45, 6’4”, 205lbs, BF 22%, still have most of my hair. Wife 43, in shape, married 8 years. Kids: 5 girl, 4 girl Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, SGM, 16CofP. Next: MAP (50%), WISNIFG Current situation: Wife and kids live a state apart. Bouncing back from rock bottom in the relationship. I drive 5 hours most weekends to see them. Fitness: Week 10 of weighted calisthenics training. I’ve made good upper b…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/19 07:30 PM
1

Overall, it’s a good weekend. Everybody is happy and having fun. I think I mess up once. I’m working in the garage and cleaning out my car interior while she’s jumping on the trampoline with the kids. She yells at me to pick up the poop on the driveway that the dog just dropped. All she has to do is put her shoes on and walk 10 steps….I’m busy working, I’m further away, and I have to turn off the vacuum and leave the car just to hear her. She’s chilling on the trampoline on her ass. I just do th…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/19 01:18 PM
1

Next few months are rock bottom. She lets me talk to the kids, but doesn’t even give me the time of day. Sleeps in the other room on weekends. I start my own coping process. I start facing the reality of divorce. I think about what that looks like. I start living as sparsely as possible…. Sleeping on the floor in a sleeping bag, no heat, cancel all bills, minimal food. Just to see if I could get to financial independence with half my salary. It takes some of the fear away. I come to grips with t…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/19 01:07 PM
1

#ComteDeBetamax Long Distance MRP Challenge: OYS #1 Me: 45, 6’4”, 205lbs, BF 22%, still have most of my hair. Wife 43, in shape, married 8 years. 2 Kids Read: NMMNG, MMSLP, SGM, 16CofP. Next: MAP (50%), WISNIFG Background: Raised a beta bitch my whole life and had no fucking clue. Thought the world ran on effort, honor, and commitment….just grind away and you shall receive from the world….when that was in fact covert contracting. Got far in life despite those cement boots, but never got firing o…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/19 12:54 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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