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Confection_Efficient Archive

View 3 posts and 133 comments by Confection_Efficient on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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36

🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 06:02 AM
8

I’m so tired of seeing things like this. There’s absolutely no focus in any part of our society on men becoming “real” or emotionally healthy“ or becoming anything at all in order to be better versions of themselves. You will never hear of men frantically trying to “manifest” their perfect partner because they don’t have to. Brrrr. It’s all so antiquated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 05:59 AM
22

My favorites one is “you look great for your age”. Grrr.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 05:07 AM
2

One word. Ewwwwwwwww.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 04:36 AM
59

Here’s the thing. As soon as someone insults you overtly or covertly it’s time to get to steppin’. I dated two men over the course of my life who insulted me. One said my butt was big and the other actually told me he didn’t want to have sex with me after I came on to him. And the worst part? I made excuses! I found a way to rationalize both comments. Oh and guess what? Both men had no problem having sex with me in the end. So yeah. Just end it right there. No point in trying to understand, have…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 01:56 PM
8

I think she also needs to remember her own worth and love herself more. I would never take on a second job to go on a vacation with a man and his family. Matter of fact, I’d never date a wealthy guy who was that stingy emotionally and fiscally. Not to mention callous and insensitive. Boy, bye.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 12:59 PM
9

Omigosh! I have three guinea pigs! I have to hold myself back from adopting more 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 04:47 AM
5

Yeah. I grew up in a family like that. I was really just bringing some levity to the mix. 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 05:38 PM
10

Now I’m intrigued about all the bad things!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:53 PM
52

I dream of a world where women’s hair isn’t policed. Clippers, razors, wax, nobody cares. Can you imagine it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 06:47 PM
6

Ohmylord. What cards. Where. 😒
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 01:06 AM
2

I appreciate your thoughtfulness and the way you’ve articulated it in this reply!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 02:56 PM
2

Hey darlin’, I can tell that it’s frightening that he not only insulted you but also threatened you on LinkedIn. It was so unexpected! I just want to remind you that you are in fact powerful. Try to remember that you have options. If you have sexual trauma from your past this can feel extremely triggering. If you don’t, it can feel like maybe you’re in danger. So take a very deep breath. Know that you are powerful. Know that you’re fear is keeping you safe and then gently pat it on the head and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 02:54 PM
17

I also think some men are just incapable of change and have no desire to change for any woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/21 12:23 AM
13

So awful 😢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 03:06 AM
61

I’m never even stepping foot in the post-date hell that is: “I shaved my legs for this?” Never. Again. I dated beneath me for too long. I feel this post in my bones. It’s truly better to stay single than to step out on your own standards and self-worth. Uh uh. No m’am.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 05:52 AM
6

I can just hear the Shaggy song right now “Wasn’t Me”. Mhmmmm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/21 04:30 AM
45

Right??? Ugh. I’m sure you’re over it. Reminds me of that J.Lo song,”Ain’t your mama”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 05:20 AM
87

What??? I just can’t. I’ve always had men cooking for me. If a man so much as hints in that direction fuggedaboutit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 05:13 AM
24

That’s exactly what I was thinking! Seriously, if the man child can’t even sleep in a bed there’s absence no hope. This is a basic self-care thing. Ick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 03:52 PM
24

Yes. Girl. Yes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 10:42 PM
31

This poem made my day! Thank you! I’m pretty sure the poet didn’t intend for me, the reader, to burst into laughter , but I’m literally howling. It’s true the “I almost, was gonna” lasts a heck of a lot longer than the flowers themselves. But I’d rather bury dead flowers than a dead relationship because said guy couldn’t be arsed to follow through.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 07:23 PM
10

I hear you. In my case, I was set up by a friend. So it was less about getting attention and more about finding a life partner. I was nearing the end of my ability to have children even at 25, so settling down with a man in his 30s wasn’t out of the realm of appropriate for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 08:22 PM
8

I totally hear you. That’s a hard pass for me too. Good for you for leaving that mess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 07:38 PM
53

I’m reminded of a wealthy lawyer I dated when he was in his early 30s and I was in my early 20s. I was in a doctorate program at the time and on a very tight budget. Whenever we went out on dates he took me to expensive restaurants...Until one night, he asked me why I just expected him to pay. At that moment, I felt my mouth run dry. It was like a light switch flipped on. Suddenly I realized the honey moon phase was over. He’d been putting his best foot forward for three months and now the real …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 07:02 PM
85

Ugh. I had a bf once who got upset when I told him I wanted him inside me. In his words I was being bossy and he was the one who was going to decide when he would enter my body. I was honestly shocked. I ended things the next day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 01:35 AM
7

He wants to look like he’s a committed, mature man capable of building a life with someone. That’s the version of himself that is acceptable to society and to his coworkers. And, uh, of course it is!!! He’s angry you won’t go along with the lie because he knows he’s an immature boy man and that he’s stringing you along. I’m sorry sweetheart but you deserve so much better. Man children don’t change. I hope you get to experience a true partnership with a man who wants to walk every step of this jo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 01:18 AM
16

Men don’t “develop “ at all past a certain point. Abandon hope my lovelies. Embrace the reality in front of you and get to stepping from that “free pussy” man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 01:04 AM
4

Preach!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/21 07:51 PM
249

I was on a subway once and this really scary man kept staring at me. Because I know how predators work and because I knew if I showed fear things could end badly for me when I got off the train I confronted him—loudly. I screamed at him, “What the fuck are you looking at? Stop staring at me!” He got really defensive and said I was looking at him first. “Hmmm, umm, I felt you boring a hole in me. That wasn’t me staring at you asshole that was me calling you out on being fucking creepy.” People ar…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/21 09:45 PM
11

I’ve been waiting a long time to use the word “cockamamie” in a sentence. So here it goes: that’s blatant cockamamie!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/21 05:17 PM
27

I sad laughed at this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 07:09 PM
51

Whoaaaa. That’s really judgmental of him. Clearly he’s not generous or compassionate if he’s already decided you’re financially unstable just because you rent. Life happens. Adversity happens. Ugh. I’m glad you unmatched with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 04:56 PM
56

I love that you found someone who sees, supports, respects, and values you completely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 04:51 PM
26

If you’re with a NVM and get sick that’s as close to dying alone as it gets. He won’t take care of you in any way, shape or form. But you’ll now be too sick to work and with a man who kicks you when you’re down. That’s a big tall glass of no thanks. I’ve chosen to be single to avoid that situation again. And when I had surgery last year I hired a home health care aide. She was amazing and I felt completely cared for. It’s not worth settling, lovelies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 04:46 PM
3

Lol you are so welcome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/21 03:54 PM
39

I think you better call Tyrone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 10:56 PM
16

Good for you!!!! You reminded me of a night when I was a cocktail waitress. I’d been on the clock for 8hours with men groping me, cat calling and overall being animals. At about midnight this older man called me over and asked me what would happen if he put his ear to my pooka shell necklace and I replied, “ it would say fuck you in a really small voice.” He never bothered me again. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 10:50 PM
20

I’m gagging right now. This is absolutely vile! I’m really old school btw. So if a man ever asked me this I’d seriously go off on him. Sexual preference questions come wayyyy later in a dating sitch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 10:46 PM
20

Ummm. My stepdad spent five months defending Trump. Finally about a week ago I finally said, “Guess what? I’m allowed to not agree with you and bullying me to see your side and then magically convert to your way of thinking is NOT going to happen. Also, what do you get out of starting this same conversation every time we talk? Is there a world in which you live in where men and women can disagree without men having to foist their opinions onto women? Also, call me when that would comes into view…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:53 AM
3

Yesss. So when I was in my early 20s I got engaged to a LVM who was emotionally and verbally abusive. Thank goodness I got out of it before walking down the aisle. I don’t know if he would have ever gotten physically violent but I’m relieved I didn’t stick around long enough to find out! Seriously my life would have been destroyed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 06:22 PM
28

Ohmylord this is tragically true. As I once told a friend, “Women fake orgasms, men fake entire relationships.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 05:43 PM
11

She clearly needs FDS, higher self esteem and to dump his ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/21 05:48 AM
5

I totally understand and agree! And if you can’t afford adoption or IVF it’s really a huge problem. I’ve heard some women say “try to make more money” but that isn’t the exact answer either because that opportunity isn’t available to many of us. Also, not everyone has a huge support system so even if you can come up with the money it’s still a tremendous undertaking to have a child and really requires a village, truly, to do it well. To speak plainly, I don’t think there’s a simple solution here…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 04:34 AM
21

I want a man who can be self-reflexive and not projectile vomit all of his wants and needs onto me. It’s not just respect I want but to be seen as a whole person with an entire universe inside of me. When a man can see, admire, support and cherish that universe, well ladies, that’s the man I’ll be committing to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 03:49 PM
2

He’s the Yogi of mediocrity, ignorance and acceptance of a system that only benefits him. Yes, I totally meant that pun. Blech.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 11:12 PM
7

I think it's wonderful that Aaron is also involved in Next Gen Men. It looks like he's part of a new movement invested in developing HVM. I'm excited to see this. I hope this catches on. We need this at scale.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 06:25 PM
84

This is very common in countries where the patriarchy reigns supreme and women are only as valuable as their ability to serve as baby makers and indentured servants to the whims of their families and husbands. I’m heart sick reading this. I can only imagine her suffering.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 03:43 PM
20

One day in high school a guy with a deformed hand asked me out. I went because I felt like if I didn’t go I would seem like a shallow person. When I got home I was in tears as I confessed my guilt. My mother asked me one question, “Are you nauseous around him?”. I said “Yes, does this make me a terrible person?” She said, No sweetheart. If you’re nauseous, you’re nauseous. That’s the end of it.” Her philosophy was there’s no point in dissecting why and it’s ok to just walk away. You owe yourself…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 02:50 PM
16

Yes and never forget the moobs. If you see moobs run for the hills.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 04:22 AM
21

My stomach turned seeing this. The massage therapist who raped me used the words “tantric” and “spiritual release” right before it happened. Seriously these kinds of men can be really dangerous and you don’t even see it coming . Thank you so much for posting this. It really can save lives.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 04:01 PM
3

Sadly, I’ve found most men to be bottomless pits of need who often disguise their selfishness (at first )and pretend to be kind and attentive. Over time, it becomes clear they’re just being giving so they can get their needs met. I am not saying all men do this. But I am suggesting we all take time to scratch beneath the surface. Even the “nice” ones can be lifetime projects if you take a closer look. And honestly, ain’t nobody got time for that. I’m done playing mommy, therapist, chef, cleaning…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 06:41 AM
1

It’s true. I’m of the mind to change this word. Language is fluid and we’re some very evolved women here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 08:43 PM
2

But how sad is it that he has to tell him that? You can tell the husband feels resentful that his wife looked at his Instagram in the first place and that she’s making a request at all of him. Also randomness... but did you guys know “husband “ means” householder??? Ummmm. Takes the romance right out of things doesn’t it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 04:07 PM
6

I mean why not buy her a bag and comfort her? It’s called being giving and there shouldn’t be a type of giving. Just unconditional love. Very simple.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 05:14 AM
28

That’s just cruel.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 03:08 AM
8

Right? Lol. Poor guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 07:52 PM
123

Honestly? One bf of mine told me I had a fuller butt than he was used to and I snapped. I told him I was used to more than a four inch penis and while we were slinging preferences I was also used to just two nipples on a man. Homey had four! He also got teary eyed. Looking back I know this was cruel but at the time I felt he was so critical of me and constantly making comments about my body. Everyone has their limits.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 01:14 PM
13

I also think having healthy self-esteem is vital to setting and sticking to boundaries. Knowing your worth means having a partner who communicates and doesn’t shut down when he’s upset and doesn’t point the finger when uncomfortable emotions come up—that’s the foundation. If you can build from that healthy sense of self and self-worth then the fear of him walking away or of needing to be the fixer vanishes. You’re not trying to save or fix a man anymore because you know deep in your soul that’s …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 12:53 PM
12

Ummm I so wish I couldn’t relate. When i asked my ex if he could take me to my hysterectomy he said I don’t think so. I can’t deal with anymore of your surgeries. I’m over it. I had stage 4 endo and adeno and all of my organs were fused together! I literally couldn’t walk anymore. 😒
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 12:43 PM
5

“And it wasn’t my fault. Not where I was or what I wore”. Yes. This. Probably the most powerful part for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 08:18 PM
6

Absolutely. Abuse is always at the root of codependency. And being loving and gentle with ourselves is definitely the rule and not the exception ❤️❤️❤️❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 09:56 PM
24

I was all in until he said stop eating Cheetos 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 06:12 AM
22

Wait, you mean wearing big shoulder pads in suit jackets didn’t even the playing field? I thought that would fix everything! Day ruined.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 05:26 AM
12

A lot of men spend zero time on self-reflexive activity. Why should they when they have built in emotional laborers and therapists in their girlfriends and wives? This makes them very shallow and emotionally shut down not to mention apathetic. Good for you for GTFO. Im sorry about your thyroid 🥺. Sending huge hugs!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/20 08:11 PM
39

I’ve thought about this a lot over the years and I think a lot of men see sex as THE way to connect at all with women. So, they need physical connection to feel at all close to women and women need emotional connection and a true sense of safety and trust to feel ready to have sex. The more women feel this the more they can let their freak flags fly in the bedroom. This guy is not getting the connection between emotional intimacy and sexual freedom for women. Many of us have been sexually assaul…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/20 04:45 PM
2

I’d even argue that one-sided is abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/20 05:39 PM
7

Omg he literally is. Evil lurks in unexpected corners. Watch OUT.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/20 03:24 PM
19

🤢 Gross
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/20 06:16 AM
89

Ladies. My ex got me The Four hour body” as a Christmas gift. Ummmmm. What woman wants to be told they should work out more? And after that he got me a broom and a mop for my birthday. Nice, huh? After that I never got another gift again. We were together for ten years. Don’t even ask me why or how. I met him right after my identical twin died. I was vulnerable and broken. Please be careful if you’re going through something difficult. These kinds of men will literally find you at your weakest an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/20 06:12 AM
10

I can’t even tell you how many times I’d tell a friend about a conversation I had with my ex that ended with the cliffhanger question, “So what’d he say after you poured your heart out?” And that disappointed look on her face when I said, “Umm. He said nothing”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 04:56 AM
38

I feel like if he said, “I love to cook too. What’s your favorite to make?” I’d be all over that. But already sitting down and licking his chops makes me want to 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/20 03:21 AM
5

Gotta hand it to Taylor. She’s literally the subject matter expert in picking LVM and writing guides to getting over them in songs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 09:11 PM
17

Thank you for explaining this! I was seriously confused. I fell down reaching for the book and got up completely disoriented 🤪
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 01:09 AM
11

I can’t get past the bad grammar.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 08:39 PM
20

I told a male colleague last week to stop interrupting me and when he then tried explaining what I just said to the business execs I told him the group didn’t need a recap and they understood me just fine. I don’t think he’ll be doing that again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 03:24 AM
10

I’m curious to learn more. Are there psychological research studies you might share?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 06:16 AM
8

I completely agree. And just not engaging at all works too. It doesn’t pay to argue with fools.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 06:23 AM
17

Two words: Lorena Bobbit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 07:41 AM
25

I noticed when I was in middle school and my body became a baseball score board. I realized at the age of 13 that not letting my then boyfriend go to second base” meant I was a “prude”. And he used this to try to humiliate me in front of the entire school . Apparently not letting him have access to my body was a crime. And this is when my lack of interest in sex being a transaction or something I had to pretend to consent to as a way to belong or feel cared for began. Sometimes losing interest i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 07:34 AM
20

I’m not really a fan of a man who builds a story around this blanket generalization specifically to validate himself. An insecure man is the least attractive of all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 03:45 AM
19

Omg I got this from my last manager at a fortune 100 company. I’m so glad I realized HE was initimidated by me and stopped feeling f’ing bad that I’m a powerful woman with things called thoughts and intellect. We are allowed to be powerful, ladies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 10:11 PM
1

https://www.autismspeaks.org/signs-autism That’s a website that has info but again I’d take it with a grain of salt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 04:43 PM
4

Ummm. I’m really sick of this whole “manifesting” bs. Oh she “attracted” him to her, eh? She manifested a creepy sicko, right? UGH. No. I don’t think so. He was already in the world doing depraved things. This has zero to do with her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 03:08 AM
11

Change takes time. In theory, it’s not a lot to ask of a man, but in practice we’re undoing centuries of gender programming and division of labor. I feel like some men have been raised with that higher bar mindset and truly love and respect women. Others have a steeper learning curve. HVM really need to start educating these LVM and NVM. Clearly, it’s not our job as women. Systemic change can’t just come from our “not gonna take it anymore “ mentality. It has to come from within man circles and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 02:45 PM
25

There’s nothing that turns a woman on more than a man doing dishes, laundry and cooking dinner without having to be asked or bullied into it. Add him asking how our day was, remembering our birthdays and anniversaries and, well, clean up on aisle four.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 12:54 PM
2

Ugh, yeah.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 01:31 AM
6

So... my ex-hubs used MY struggle with life threatening reproductive cancer as a way to pick up women after our divorce. I’m not even kidding. He wanted these poor innocent women to feel sorry for him for all HE went through with me. Despicable, eh? It’s amazing what your eyes will allow you to see once you stop trying to look at a person for who you want them to be. Dangerous men usually pass themselves off as good guys and victims of life. Blech.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 04:05 AM
50

Yes! It took me ten years with my partner to finally realize he wasn’t ever going to become the man I needed him to be. Liberating myself has been mind blowing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 03:12 PM
12

And this is why I leave the house strategically. I honestly calculate the rape to safety ratio for every outing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 05:37 AM
5

Hello! So, criterion have changed over the years and the concept of a spectrum has become more prevalent. Autism as a diagnosis has been around for several decades, but it’s been having a moment more recently.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 12:15 AM
18

As a former psychologist, I can tell you that the DSM getting updated causes certain diagnoses to be suddenly in “fashion”. I’m hard pressed to believe that every person now diagnosed is truly autistic. This is partly why I left the field. Psychology is the new religion. Blech.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 11:19 PM
16

Don’t forget Dane Cook. Ugh. I heard him praise his very young gf recently for his current success and emotional well-being. 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 01:47 PM
9

Those people are called warriors ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 09:56 PM
5

Ugh. How terrible. Men are animals. But military men are animals with guns in packs. 😏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 01:12 PM
4

Clearly he doesn’t know the difference between literally and figuratively. Also, why is he SO exhausted? Was he crossing a dangerous river on foot so he could get to work on time in the dangerous cadmium mines, and then chased by a lion whom he defeated (yay, him) only to be attacked by a belligerent rhino who he outsmarted (duh, of course he did)? I’m tired of these weird humblebrags about being sooo busy and soooo tired. Girl, you dodged a bullet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 10:52 PM
2

Clearly he doesn’t know the difference between literally and figuratively. Also, why is he SO exhausted? Was he crossing a dangerous river on foot so he could get to work on time in the dangerous cadmium mines, and then chased by a lion whom he defeated (yay, him) only to be attacked by a belligerent rhino who he outsmarted (duh, of course he did)? I’m tired of these weird humblebrags about being sooo busy and soooo tired. Girl, you dodged a bullet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 10:51 PM
1

Clearly he doesn’t know the difference between literally and figuratively. Also, why is he SO exhausted? Was he crossing a dangerous river on foot so he could get to work on time in the dangerous cadmium mines, and then chased by a lion whom he defeated (yay, him) only to be attacked by a belligerent rhino who he outsmarted (duh, of course he did)? I’m tired of these weird humblebrags about being sooo busy and soooo tired. Girl, you dodged a bullet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 10:51 PM
7

Clearly he doesn’t know the difference between literally and figuratively. Also, why is he SO exhausted? Was he crossing a dangerous river on foot so he could get to work on time in the dangerous cadmium mines, and then chased by a lion whom he defeated (yay, him) only to be attacked by a belligerent rhino who he outsmarted (duh, of course he did)? I’m tired of these weird humblebrags about being sooo busy and soooo tired. Girl, you dodged a bullet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 10:51 PM
3

I’m not even outraged anymore just deeply, deeply sad. I think I passed outrage after my third rape. Something inside me closed shut so I could step away and truly heal. And I share this because when you feel you’re body is no longer your own there is more than rage that screams . There is grief and sadness too, The sadness tells me that the divine connection between men and women is broken. I can see that this war against women is a war against creation itself and the sacredness of all that is …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 01:21 PM
3

I totally understand the recovery time. Some lessons are more painful than others and exact their price in tears. I’m so sorry you suffered 🥺
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 05:52 PM
110

I almost married a LVM and I spent a year crying about why he didn’t pick me. Well, I found out a few years later after he broke off our relationship that he married a stripper who ended up cheating on him and taking all of his money. He manifested exactly what he believed about women and it came back to him in spades. I thank god every day I discovered I was a queen worthy of a king and not some low- life looking to keep me as his own personal blow up doll. Btw, he’s now living with a gf he tol…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 04:50 AM
3

Yes! He’s an ex. He didn’t take it well. And not long after I broke it off. Dodged a bullet there. 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 03:12 AM
14

So ridiculous. I had a bf who told me he didn’t like it when I wore lipstick. I was miffed and rebellious simultaneously. I decided that no man was going to dictate my physical appearance. Later that day he picked me up for our fifth date in which I wore a full face of makeup and three layers of red lipstick :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/20 07:13 PM
2

Omigosh. Yesss. My last guy hadn’t completed his college degree, was still accepting money from his mother at the age of 29 and had no plans of ever getting his driver’s license because he used growing up in Dubai as an excuse. Excuse me your highness I didn’t know I was supposed to be your personal chauffeur. When I think of what I put up with, in the hopes he’d grow up and finally love me the way I deserved, I have to stop myself from getting angry all over again. I was in a very bad place whe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 04:58 PM
13

I’ve been noticing this trend in text messages from men where they add “LOL” after every sentence. Is that supposed to soften the blow of being an insensitive/emotionally unavailable jerk?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/20 12:07 PM
5

Honestly? I had to have a radical hysterectomy at a very young age which has kicked me into menopause because of Stage 4 endometriosis ( which is a whole other Oprah) and I’ve lost complete interest in mating. I’m making a distinction here between mating and sex because before I had this primal urge whereas now I have more of a mild interest in sexual pleasure. It’s so freeing! And I love the concept of gonadal tranquility. It’s perfect. My body no longer makes terrible mating/dating decisions f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 01:47 PM
16

I am proud that I got his license taken away and thrown in prison. Because I was the first to come forward and press charges it gave 6 other women the courage to also step forward. I still have flashbacks and I’ll never go for another massage again but I no longer blame myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 12:57 PM
42

I felt this so strongly when I was sexually assaulted during a massage by a male massage therapist. Somehow it was my fault just in the language used. And others blamed me for going to a male in the first place. Didn’t I know all male massage therapists are predators? The onus was always on me somehow. It’s healing knowing we are helping to change that concept together. It doesn’t change what happened but it does help change the internal narrative and that means the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 11:32 PM
2

Ok, but is she in tears because she’s laughing at how ridiculous this all is? Because to me that’s the only sane thing to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 12:11 AM
232

Two words...Over it. I’m so done with “so busy” and I’m really glad a lot of us are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 12:57 AM
9

Can you really call them “men”? A true man adores women and doesn’t think negatively about them or feel the need to over generalize based on memes, past negative experiences or poor self-esteem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 04:22 PM
4

Le sigh. I totally get your frustration. Lots of men aren’t exactly pondering their existence, let alone their philosophy and belief systems around the dance between men and women. Wanting a man who thinks his own thoughts isn’t a huge ask. You’d think. In my experience, men who think outside the box (pun unintentional) are usually free thinkers, educated and a bit more sophisticated. You might find them at cafes or in entrepreneurial environments. They for sure aren’t huddled around an office c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 03:30 PM
8

THIS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 10:05 PM
7

Sweetheart, he lied to you in a really big way and that in and of itself is reason to RUN. The onus to understand why is not on you. I’m actually glad this all came out before you married him. Being tethered to a man like this will ruin your life. Please, enjoy your youth and find a man who’s got it together. There are gentlemen out there without baby mama drama. I promise. And I’m so sorry you’re going through this!!! Big hugs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 01:53 PM
15

It’s not an honor just be nominated, ya know? And even if he does pick you, is he a man you really want as your partner in life? I think we settle because our biological clocks start hammering inside of our chests and we are painfully aware we’re running out of time. We settle for the LVM because let’s face it, HVM are really hard to find. And LVMs are a dime a dozen. And on top of that, when we don’t find a good man, we’re told to give up on men completely and go it alone. But, not all women ca…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 10:21 PM
12

I totally hear you. I honestly think there’s just no way to know certain things about someone until you take the chance to get to know them. I think it’s great he showed his flaws early on. You weren’t really invested and you weren’t in imminent danger. Thank god! I think the question is did you ignore any part of your intuition?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 04:14 PM
39

I feel sick. It’s not really about forgiveness. He really needs professional help. PLEASE don’t blame yourself in any way. You didn’t attract a mentally guy. Unfortunately, there are more of them out there than there are of us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 04:08 PM
3

I went to a women’s only gym for years! It really was awesome. The only thing I didn’t like was the all nakedness all the time in the locker room.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 02:18 PM
17

Hahahaha. My favorite part of this is “men are dirty” yep, we were wise to give each other cootie shots against boys when we were little. Who knew?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 12:09 AM
2

I had a terrible habit of falling for “fixers” for years. I never questioned the belief that I was there as the object to be admired, consumed, blamed and sometimes abused. The idea that men need to do their own self-care, emotional labor and introspection seemed like something out of a mythical romance novel written by a woman as starved for these things as I came to be! And it didn’t help that other women told me to stop wanting these things and that I’d need to stop having needs altogether if…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 05:30 PM
3

Preach
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 12:20 AM
15

To be fair these women are all Hollywood actors who make a lot of money and get paid to look younger than they are. I’d really like for us as women to accept aging as a reality and as a mark of wisdom and time well spent on this earth. Wrinkles can be beautiful just as the rings on a tree. I’d love for us to move away from seeing our own value and worth as one with our appearance. That has to come from us and not from men. We have to rediscover what it means to be goddesses and wise women. ((( h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 10:46 PM
52

It really is. Learning to recognize these types of “men” when they cross your path is critical. I think raising the bar of communication has been the one thing I’ve changed over the years. I refuse to let men text me for actual communication. If you want to really connect you have to call me. Period. Anyone who tries to use text as their primary way of “making an effort “ just isn’t mature enough to be dateable for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 07:48 PM
6

I completely agree! Most of my female relationships center around men. If we’re not talking about them we’re competingfor them and tearing each other down over them. It makes me really, really sad. I literally have no value as a single woman with no children in my 40s. How is it my fault that I’ve had to pick through NVMS and LVM my whole life? I am not apologizing for choosing myself and authentic love and respect. I’d rather be a goddess who loves and cares about myself and the world, than a e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:53 PM
16

I used to live in the glorious capitol where these kinds of men congregate and flourish—Boulder, CO. So many fields there and failure to thrive guys. Ugh. Thank gawd I got out of there!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:23 PM
13

I’ve straight up told men I date to shave. It’s really ok to express your wants and needs without feeling guilty or bad. I’ve let the men know 1. I don’t find it attractive 2. It hurts my sensitive skin 3. It’s unhygienic . Unless we’re holed up in the Artic and his beard stands between him and survival.. ummm... make it stop. Ladies, it’s ok to voice your preferences! Throw it back!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 09:02 PM
2

I think the bigger question is how did reading his replies make you feel? If you feel his focus on your looks is shallow and you want a deeper connection then yes perhaps it’s wise just to let him go. Always trust your intuition.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:48 PM
2

Awww. I’m so glad to help in some small way ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:16 PM
10

Lol. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 02:10 PM
281

When I was in college I met what I thought was a very sweet guy. During one of our conversations as I was sharing some of my thoughts and feelings he called me “emotional” and “negative”. As we neared the end of the conversation he asked me if I was free that Sunday for a date and I point blank said “Nope. I’m going to be emotional and negative that’s day.” Be willing to throw it back ladies! They don’t get to create the reflection of you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 01:05 PM
8

Women fake orgasms. Men fake entire relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 12:33 AM
5

We often get so caught up in needing men to validate our worth through our physical beauty that we ourselves forget we’re whole and beautiful just as we are. If a man decides your imperfections are ugly, then yes this is a gift and a wonderful reminder to stare into your own mirror and remember to love you just as you are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 12:14 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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