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CosmicBioHazard Archive

View 3 posts and 1,535 comments by CosmicBioHazard on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

yes. a need for collective, that does not mean it's a need for an individual. Maybe in an ant colony where the individual emmets are all pawns for their queen, but in mammal species each individual is generally vying for the opportunity to contribute their genetics to the upcoming generation; if not consciously, then instinctually by seeking out opportunities for sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 07:32 PM
2

It wouldn’t help anyway. The height of the Bulimia Epidemic, iirc, was hitting naturally thin women and girls jealous of decrepit-looking vogue models hand-chosen by gay men in the fashion industry. Men have never been into that physique but an entire generation were influenced by popular culture to consider what they were interested in to be “fat.” Body positivity was a later overcorrection to this lead by overweight people with no desire to improve their circumstances but feeling entitled to t…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:04 PM
2

I mean, I agree largely with the points that bonding will ultimately take precedence over more shallow considerations, but I think it’s also important to take into consideration the type of environment that RP’s target audience is operating within. The least shallow among women don’t tend to remain single for very long, so finding someone they can start an intimate relationship with purely on the element of propinquity is extremely luck-of-the-draw. Social awkwardness reduces these odds further …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 06:10 PM
7

I think that the main reason bonding is ignored here is simply that, for any relationship with a sexual component, there has to be a willingness from the parties involved to, well, have sex, at some point. In the absence of that, the same progression of bonding won’t come to a head in a romance. Now I don’t think that the transactional red pill view is completely right about every claim it makes, but its adherents are right to strategize about how to get sexual attention, especially if they cann…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 04:17 PM
1

Don’t we all
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 02:03 PM
3

I mean that’s kind of what I’m saying; nitpicking between 3 and 5 is just compromise when giving up on 0.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 01:59 PM
1

Self evident to the people who talk about it, I mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 01:51 PM
3

N count discourse is damage control but that’s not to say I disagree with it. The advantage that being a virgin marrying another virgin has toward developing deep feelings is self evident to some, alien to others, but just follow my logic regarding those of us it is self evident to: if your own circumstance deprives you of the chance to have that advantage, or if your dating options are restricted to people for whom N=0 is false: she’d hook up before but demands a relationship from me for the sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 01:29 PM
1

Perfectly reasonable statement.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 11:16 AM
2

Sure but your arguments haven’t demonstrated that it’s ridiculous
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 10:24 AM
3

Most men are going to think it reasonable to not deny their woman an experience they had before her if she wanted it, so no it’s not unreasonable for a woman to expect that from a man. Why make a thread arguing a point you disagree with as some kind of ‘gatcha’?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 10:15 AM
3

Yeah none of that looks unreasonable
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 08:50 AM
2

How
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 07:57 AM
8

That sounds perfectly reasonable though; if you’re expecting disagreement I can’t fathom why. Cause if you’re trying to say “look how silly this mentality looks when you reverse the roles,” no, it doesn’t look silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 07:42 AM
1

my guess is many guys are having to punch down and settle for women on the heavier side in many cases. I won’t deny that a lot of men are desperate but I can’t imagine, in a world where men are inclined naturally toward casual sex and keeping their options open, that they’re choosing to commit with such low standards. If they’re compromising on looks it could be less for a lack of attractive options and more for a lack of attractive options who aren’t insufferable.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 12:35 AM
0

Anecdotal, but those apps, to my experience, are a cesspit and attract mostly a certain type of woman; you might not chance on any women worth pursuing IRL, but they’re not on the apps either, so hedge your bets and see if you can locate them.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 12:13 AM
–

Absolutely not. I had the misfortune of ending up divorced after saving myself for a marriage to someone who’d done the same; after all if I was going to commit, the sense of ‘specialness’ would have to be optimal. I started actively shunning commitment after that but if the woman with no history of casual whom started dating since doesn’t walk out on me I’ll probably end up married anyway, because I’m a massive hypocrite.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:42 PM
1

I’m not saying anything about reasons here; I’m saying that any sexual interaction between a man and a woman pushes the average for both sexes up by the same amount. Therefore it’s useless to count average n count for men and women if you’re trying to argue that there are just as many men with any sexual experience as women.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:22 PM
–

If top 15% men are committing to top 50% women in any significant numbers, surely that must leave fewer top 15% men for the top 15% of women. And is she really in the top 15 if she can’t secure a top 15 partner? The logic tracks if you’re talking about who’s hooking up with who but once you get to the point of marriage the math stops mathing.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:17 PM
1

And I’m saying, averages mean nothing if you’re comparing a huge population of men with no experience to a population of women who mostly average higher numbers than them because they’re largely gaining that experience with the same few hypersexual men.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:06 PM
1

If you factor out the LGBT crowd, the ‘average’ n count ratio should be 1:1 It’s only useful to compare populations of men vs women at any given number.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:00 PM
1

Are 22 year old men actually excluding 28 year old women from the pool of whom they’d approach trying to hook up? I would think that any lack of sexual activity between people of that gap would come from the preferences of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:50 PM
1

I think I can safely say that men’s disinterest in older women is on the level of the commitment; so the disadvantage you’re referring to applies to any man in his early 20’s beelining toward settling down. That same man looking for a hookup is directly within the niche tastes of tonnes of women experiencing some sort of post-divorce midlife crisis, and he would most certainly go for it, but a man trying to settle down that young probably has motives for doing so that force him to consider pesky…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:41 PM
1

I see a strong male preference for the slow-burn model that I think I’d attribute, quite simply, with male preference overall as to who they’d like to commit to; slow-burn allows him to vet the woman for things like sexual reservedness while someone who offers immediate sexual access works actively against that. I hear tell of women, on the other hand, trying to get commitment by sleeping with their object of interest quickly in the hopes that he’ll be impressed with the ‘quality’ of the experie…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:03 AM
1

I mean I’m sure if you ask any man they’d rather be cheated with than cheated on, too; but anyone would sooner take a spouse they knew for a fact wasn’t going to cheat than to risk getting diseases from someone they know is cheating, at least I would hope so.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 02:32 PM
2

Who exactly do you anticipate will argue against this?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 01:23 PM
1

Assuming that the same preferences from being a straight male would translate, then lack of experience with other women would be a major asset. Aside from that it’s hard to say; I’m realizing that I’m not so sure how many of my preferences are what I’d consider the ideal female half of a relationship and how many I’d also consider ideal for the male side; after all, what my counterpart sees in me is how I match her preference, not my own.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 12:30 PM
1

If they’re not goodlooking I would assume they wouldn’t get any kind of attention one way or the other; the presumably goodlooking ones are garnering attention for relationships, but not hookups. Which, if that’s what these men are after, means they’re doing something wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 04:13 PM
1

Mileage will vary, but on dating apps especially it seems that men are mostly meeting women with a history of hookups who’ve tired of the lifestyle and want to settle down. The problem that comes out of that is that the men in these spaces aren’t in the same boat; they haven’t done a lot of, or any, hooking up and their goals tend to be either to rack up experience or to find someone similarly inexperienced with whom to share in the early stages of sexual discovery. Committing to a ‘veteran’ mea…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:51 PM
1

They’ll go looking for hookups, be upfront about that to someone they meet, that woman will pick up an interest in them but won’t want to hook up casually and will instead request a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 12:37 PM
2

I dunno, I know of a good few guys who will get relationship offers but fail to renegotiate that to hookups when the woman is clearly adventurous otherwise. Those same men are failing to be deemed relationship material by reciprocally relationship material women. I guess that would make them incels in the sense that they’re trying and failing to become sexually involved but getting some attention doesn’t exactly fall under the scope of a complete loser.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 11:43 AM
2

These men seem to think women are trading sex for commitment and seem to think the primary purpose of a relationship is that they would then be entitled to the same kinky sex she has had before. Honestly I think the problem here is that these men are settling for relationships with women they don’t actually want to be seriously involved with because they feel like they just aren’t getting sexually involved otherwise. Are these men relationship material? It’s either that or they’re meeting women …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 11:16 AM
1

Most of them are just happy to finally have someone. Sounds like settling.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 05:18 PM
1

I can’t think of a single woman I’ve met in real life who wouldn’t refuse the prospect of a boyfriend who loves her less than he’d loved someone else. I’ve straight up seen women reject men on the premise that his ex girlfriend was more attractive than she would consider herself to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:09 PM
–

But you wouldn’t then turn around and pathologize them with ‘retroactive jealousy’ for turning you down on the basis of not wanting to marry them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 03:50 PM
–

Caring about the sort of sex she has had before and probing about it is retroactive jealousy. So what if it is? People aren’t out here being assigned romantic partners, if he’s uncomfortable with it it’s within his right not to commit to the woman in question. You are not entitled to certain sex acts. People aren’t out here being assigned romantic partners, if it’s something he wants, he’s within his right to find someone who will. Not wanting to do certain sex acts with you again does not mean …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 02:18 PM
1

They’re inexperienced, they don’t know how to pickup women for casual sex. They hop on dating apps assuming they’re casual sex forums and try to broach the topic cautiously and inoffensively. Gives the impression that it’s not all they’re after when in actuality they’re just scared to come off too forward.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 04:11 PM
1

To my observation many are, but their disposition doesn’t read that way and they’re often not believed.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 03:20 PM
1

I’ll ignore the population of fellers who are genuinely unattractive because they’re not getting relationship offers either, but the men who are upset that they’re only relationship and not hookup material must have some appeal to them. By my observations these are late bloomers and formerly relationship minded men who are now pursuing casual sex in places or on platforms where the few women they’re drawing in are the sexually adventurous type who are fatigued and currently considering settling …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 02:52 PM
3

Did I say that they were?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 02:47 PM
1

I dunno, the only thing left really enforcing these gender norms even for women is the threats of not being attractive, and the general consensus among feminists seems to be that this is a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 02:25 PM
3

Well, the first factor is that exoticism is making these men more attractive in the countries they visit. Second is that it’s exoticism making the women they’re pulling register as “10’s” to the women looking on in confusion from back home. Third is that after having a few women who fetishize exotic men approach them, these guys who had no self-esteem before get Prince Syndrome pretty quickly and start exuding confidence. As a former passport bro myself, though, I have to urge caution with every…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 11:29 AM
1

I think I’ve made enough mistakes to be qualified to chime in here; I did go abroad; and because learning a new language is mentally taxing enough as it is, I spent my academic energy getting English-teaching credentials. It pays really well in some parts relative to cost of living so finances wouldn’t have been an issue. And it’s absolutely true that being exotic in a place wins you popularity; women throwing themselves at you is a real thing. But I went over with the mentality that I was gonna…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/25 11:08 AM
1

it might be either this or nothing. Most men would take nothing. No man needs a girlfriend; we default to avoiding commitment unless a woman is deserving of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/25 07:24 PM
5

Considering divorce statistics, seems to be about 50% Yeah but previous divorcees are more likely to divorce again so I have a feeling that these 50% of marriages that fail a good few of them are happening to less than 50% of people who marry.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 12:35 PM
3

voted against their own self interests Everybody votes in their own self-interest. But they have to balance what they want versus what comes with it if they vote for a particular party. with things like free healthcare, strong workers rights, paid parental leave, free education, etc. Much more relevant, actually, to the family man trying to raise a kid than it is to the guy who can go out and sleep with anyone and never have to settle down. But you have to balance that with the fact that the sam…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 10:12 AM
4

Not everyone knows the actual statistics so your actual likelihood of falling victim to crime won’t necessarily be your perceived risk. Plus more fear mongering gets directed at women and culturally their confidence in ability to defend themselves trends lower.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/23 03:38 PM
2

there probably isn’t any sex happening And something I think a lot of these men have trouble articulating is that their willingness is to put up with an abusive relationship for sex, not that they’re willing to put up with abuse for a relationship. Present an ostensibly abusive woman to a lonely man and ask if he’d rather put up with her abuse just long enough for an ONS or long-term to secure a relationship with her, the guy who just wants to turn in his V-card will have a predictable answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/23 08:50 PM
2

Ah! But you’re forgetting one key detail: Pornography will never infect you with an STI, or commit paternity fraud against you, or decide it’s bored with you and take half your shit. If only everything in life could be replaced with a zero downside version of itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 08:06 PM
1

I mean I was a virgin when I married first. Divorced now. Sex is the most intimate thing I can think of, so if I can only be as intimate with someone as I’ve already been with someone else, that’s not special enough to me to deserve my lifelong commitment, and for that reason I’ve been trying only to hook up since and not get into another relationship. Of course that’s not happening either so I’m just kinda stuck doing nothing at all these days. I’d never want to pledge the rest of my life to so…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 10:46 AM
1

Being even everyone’s 9 isn’t good enough cause you’ll only get picked by a woman to whom you’re a 10. So 10
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/23 12:59 PM
1

Perhaps someone can confirm that similar cases to mine also exist, but… I married quite young, wanting just the one partner for life and all that, but of course divorce happens when you marry someone in her early 20s and neither of you have the maturity to keep a marriage going. Why do I want a hoe phase now that I’m almost 30? Well it’s partly the inability of a relationship relationship to live up to the ideal I could have had, but also; The women I’m capable of attracting have been around the…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 10:47 AM
2

That’s what happened to me. I’m irked that after moving halfway across the world to find someone who was both interested in time and not in it for the casual sex, after divorcing I’m back in Canada going ‘well if I can’t be a virgin marrying another virgin might as well go for variety’ only to have the only women interested be 100+ N who won’t touch me unless I commit and give up on having my fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/23 12:43 PM
4

My new approach strategy now is gonna be talking to a mannequin at a department store until a woman asks what I’m doing and starting a conversation from there.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/23 07:10 PM
1

Letting children starve as revenge for their mom choosing incorrectly who to open her legs for, morally based and epic lolol By not wanting to marry the single mom? So is it a vendetta against the children to not marry any given single mom? Like if you marry one single mom, but not another, are you a bad person for letting the children of single mom B starve but raising the kids of single mom A? Like you’re playing kingmaker?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 11:00 PM
13

Sex, to me, has always been largely vicarious; much of the pleasure I receive from it is directly about the pleasure my partner is feeling I’ve spoken with a lot of women who struggle to get into the mood unless it’s in reaction to the man’s pleasure, which causes encounters to sort of fizzle out if the man happens also to be in the same reactive state of mind, which sometimes we are. It gets to be a viscous cycle where the couples’ mutual enjoyment comes to a standstill because neither will ele…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/23 05:10 PM
2

Are they bothered, per se, or do they just turn those women down. I turn down childfree women because I want my own kids some day. That’s just basic incompatibility. I guess in fairness there are so many childfree women out there right now that it’s hard to find one who does want kids, which probably bothers a lot of the guys who are looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 01:58 PM
1

I saved myself so that I could experience with someone the most possible intimacy and attribute that to her exclusively. I did end up divorcing and now, because I’m not a virgin, nobody can give me that experience and therefore can’t be special enough to me as a sexual partner for me to commit to. I’ve just been trying to sleep around since, but of course everyone who’s into me demands commitment and doesn’t want casual sex, despite having had it in the past. If I knew that intimacy was going to…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/23 01:17 PM
–

I’m (according to people I know) quite attractive and mildly autistic. I’m that kind of shy, fears the consequences of talking to women and saying something wrong autistic, which limits my pool to women who are proactive enough to come talk to me. Small pool and a lot of them have a lot of problems making them undesirable. My friends in the shameless, won’t shut up camp of autism aren’t pulling very good either, but they’re pulling a lot which is not something I can say for myself. I’ve never be…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/23 10:27 PM
1

She’s been on birth control for the past 15 years I’d rather someone who wasn’t. Not gonna tell the average woman what to do but those fuck with hormones, it’s bad health consequences. Plus I’ve heard horror stories about women leaving the guy once they come off it because the hormonal fuckery was affecting their attraction to the guy. I go along with this, she comes off birth control and decides I disgust her now and I’ve made that sacrifice for nothing. Condoms are an option but they’re a hass…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/23 12:59 PM
1

I’m a man. My standards for a clean house aren’t that high, and if I’m out working all day and not home being a slob the only mess that’s being made in that house is whatever she and the kids are making. If she’s too busy doing something that benefits the household to clean up behind her then of course I’ll reorganize when I get home. I’ll also look after the kids; they’re a break from work for me, but they’re getting tiring for her after a long day. I’d do the cooking too, because it’s fun for …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/23 03:38 PM
2

That does present an issue; of course I just operate on the assumption that only a virgin could be genuinely so in love with someone that they’re just desperate to be with them, but of course I’ve had the experience of women with numbers way too high behaving as though they’re desperate to get with me, so I just have to take the number given at face value and decide based on that whether I believe the “desperate” narrative.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/23 05:13 AM
2

It would depend on one factor: N count. Because I’ve had an average-looking, below average even, girl desperate to date me and I turned her down solely because of that. Average in terms of looks is perfect. I basically perceive 6s as 10s. desperation can be an obvious red flag though; like when someone with a sky-high n claims to be in love with me I take it about as seriously as a fortune teller. When it seems genuine I like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/23 04:54 AM
–

If women weighed those higher, there'd be SO many single women because few men have these traits. If women weighed those higher, men would display those traits. Men stop being loyal because women like bad boys
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/23 11:34 AM
1

I maintain that something analogous to sunk cost plays into lifetime mating. Monogamous species develop an attachment through pair-bonding and the experience of breaking a pair-bond numbs one to the sense of loss when they end, making attachments easier to break and therefore more flimsy and less effective for raising offspring. So, naturally, both the males and females of the species start to select for signs of naivety, and it gets harder and harder to increase one’s lifetime mate count until …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 10:09 PM
1

Depends which continent the room is on
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 12:38 PM
1

You can be celibate Why would I want to, though?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/23 05:19 PM
5

It’s happened to me a few times now: A woman I know, who knows that I’m in the market right now for a hoe phase of sorts will come out of the woodwork making blatantly sexual comments. I’ll flirt back because this is great, I’m receiving sexual attention, and what she’s saying is all sexual so it’s clear that that’s all she’s after. Eventually she’ll ask “what I’m looking for,” though, and I say “what do you mean?” She’ll say she’s looking for a relationship and likes me, and I’ll say I’m only l…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 05:37 PM
5

I’ll be honest, I don’t really think of adoption in the same terms as stepparenting. As an adoptive parent you and, if you have one, your spouse, choose to take in someone unrelated to either of you and raise them. As a stepparent, that individual is directly descended from your partner, but not you. It’s lopsided, it’s bound to bring resentment. I’ve always maintained, best partner for a single mom; a single dad. Equally yoked partnership, so to speak.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/23 03:04 AM
6

Women want a monopoly on a man’s tears just like men want a monopoly on a woman’s sexuality. Got a woman insisting she’s in love with you but you don’t feel the same way and can’t seem to ‘ick’ her out of her position? Just let her see you sadding around. Be frownmiscuous.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 03:20 PM
1

What’s the scope of what we’re terming “sex life?” I would need the physical touch to be quality, so whether I say A or C depends whether A can still be skillful at playing with hair, stroking backs and other such pleasurable things.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 02:06 PM
1

Well, for example, I’m a wait-for-marriage type who unfortunately ended up divorced despite doing everything in my power not to be. I genuinely believe that if I was in a relationship the non-virgin status would put a serious damper on it, but if I had to have one, who do you think I’d want: a woman who likes me because she incorrectly believes I’m a virgin, or one who likes me because she incorrectly believes I’ve fucked over a hundred women? By that same token, who would I rather have falsely …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/23 07:58 PM
47

The sanctity of marriage is a republican value. Republicans enjoy their marriage because they like being married.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 05:36 PM
3

I’ve thought about this. If the eggs were fertilized externally and we didn’t fuck then social bonding in romantic relationships would have to develop in some other fashion. That would be a net positive for men because instead of having to take our chances being with a long-term partner when it’s so hard to find one who you can be special to, who hasn’t already had that bonding experience, you can just announce that you’d like to be a dad and one of your friends might gift you an egg so you can …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/23 11:23 PM
2

Working up the gall to talk to a woman, knowing how to hold conversation long enough to generate interest, realizing when someone is interested, reacting fast enough because you only get a short window before that interest is lost, being too nervous or awkward trying to act on it; there are so many points along the way that things can go horribly wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/23 02:45 PM
3

I am 6’3”, attractive (allegedly) and autistic. Even though I’m only mildly autistic it’s still an enormous bane; Nobody I’d be interested in wants me, at all. Looks do nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/23 12:27 PM
2

IMO I’ve seen plenty of women of the size in the picture who I thought were 10/10. Though when the opportunity comes up to actually sleep with someone of that size, in my experience that’s a bit less enjoyable, mainly for logistical reasons; the positioning can get awkward to the point of just being no fun at all. In terms of looks though, they’re good.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/23 02:03 PM
–

I don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love me. If I was, and she was financially dependent on me, for some reason, I’d have even greater motivation to leave because her lack of love for me is both robbing me of the opportunity for a better relationship and costing me money. Cheating just adds yet another motivating factor in the decision to leave her. If she wants some other guy she can be financially dependent on him.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/23 05:14 PM
1

Most men don’t care if we do really well at work. Men: women don’t care who you are as a person, they only care if you’ve got a good paying job. Women: why don’t men care about my good paying job? They don’t care if we have cool hobbies. My hobbies are pretty cool, I’m great at my trading card game of choice. This fact has never once attracted a woman to me. It’s pretty clear that all men care about is looks. I thought you were only valued for what you do? No one loves us either. They love to fu…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/23 06:02 PM
2

What the studies say, is that the same man becomes more popular (in surveys) when the respondents rating him are told that a greater number of other women rated him as attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/23 05:41 PM
–

I don’t think so. A truly bitter, unsuccessful man would want the men who are getting women to lose the resulting children. I just think that even before it’s alive in any meaningful sense, once you start debating the cutoff for killing your own children you’ve abandoned an important part of your humanity; that should never not be a tragedy. Like if someone else aborts long before a fetus has developed much at all, I’d still consider that killing in the strictest sense but I’d be grateful you we…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 06:55 PM
7

As the unfortunate victim of infidelity leading to divorce, fucking someone’s wife is my revenge fantasy. So yeah
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/23 06:21 PM
6

From my experience the only people who say “partner” are in a same-sex relationship. They think they’re being ambiguous.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/23 02:14 PM
–

You’re choosing a partner that you have to talk to for the rest of your life, potentially have children with, likely go through loss with, and forever turn to for emotional support. For the guys who care about N count, this is actually part of the argument. Hear me out: It’s meant to be a lifelong relationship, the love should be lifelong. Sex is the most intimate act, if she’s done it before, she can only be as intimate with you as she’s been before. She’s also demonstrated that the most intima…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 08:21 PM
–

do you think women should only go for men that have a small body count like woman A? Hey! Trying in good faith to contribute to the discussion here, but taking myself as an example I’m in that awkward stage of being divorced with an N of only the one, and the perspective that comes from that is as such; Sex, being the most physically intimate thing a couple could do, was something I saved for marriage because I went in with the intention of keeping the experience completely unique and special wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 07:29 PM
1

As a guy who really couldn’t be happy in a relationship now that I’m divorced and we couldn’t be each other’s first and only, the idea that ‘she should put out as fast as she did for someone else’ just feels like cope from people who, like me, would actually prefer an outright virgin. Compare the following: “Oh I’m winning because she slept with me faster than some other guy.” “He’s winning because I only wanted to sleep with the other guys, but I want him long-term.” Guys reject the later state…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/23 12:18 PM
1

She won't like an awkward, nervous man in her mid 20s Tell that to the women I’ve actually succeeded in seducing. Does being awkward and shy limit my options? Yeah. But to the women who aren’t put off by it it’s an absolute aphrodisiac. And it’s not experience that puts these women off shyness; the more experience she has, the more she’s listing after shy cherry boy over here. That sucks for me trying to date long-term because settling down with high N isn’t something I necessarily want to do, b…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 11:44 PM
0

People don’t actually think anything of a woman owning a sex toy, do they?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/23 04:25 PM
1

-Attend University -waltz into geekiest club available -listen up, fuckers -show of hands, who’s virgin here? -keep ‘em up if you’re waiting for marriage -keep ‘em up if you’re thinking of starting a family -you! In the back! -exchange numbers -refuse to elaborate further
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/23 03:39 PM
2

Disclaimer: My experience is extremely extremely limited, the following is just what I’ve found. Pleasing a woman: You can go in with the fingers for literally at least an hour, she won’t even get bored of it. You might. They’ll absolutely give you instructions if you ask. Ask what she likes, or better yet, if there’s anything she’d want to try. The requests are only ever simple. OK, you do get into that weird territory sometimes where she wants you to do something that you never would without m…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/23 09:53 PM
5

They dont care about real things of value like our career, our degree, our passions, our personality and experiences. We care about this stuff the same way we care about it on a man. Men will celebrate your successes just like they’ll celebrate a man’s if you invite them to the celebration. All men care about is our n count, our looks and our age. If I’m seeking a woman to be my sexual partner, though, these are the parameters I’m looking at, because they’re pertinent to the success of our sexua…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/23 02:55 PM
5

Any time I’ve been ‘friendzoned’ it’s been a woman with initial intentions to sleep with me who lost interest when we got to know each other and I failed to escalate in a timely manner because (allegedly) I’m ONS hot and getting comfortable with me kills the attraction. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve also had women just not interested in me to begin with and we’ve become friends instead but ‘friendzoning’ to me is when sex that would have otherwise happened doesn’t as one party reroutes their intentio…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/23 02:17 PM
-2

if they simply... can't form a connection without getting physical. Part of the reason men look for low-no N women is because the physical intimacy leads into a strong emotional connection, the likes of which we’d prefer to keep unique between us and a partner, because other forms of intimacy can’t really strengthen a connection past what being physical can.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/23 10:25 PM
2

I mean I have to agree that most people aren’t working on their attractiveness, but the low value women (and men) have pretty much the same standards as the high value ones. So at the end of the day lowering your standards won’t fix your problems
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/23 09:58 PM
5

Therefore, it is in a woman's best interest to APPEAR as though she is virtuous, modest, demur, and chaste - If she wants you to stick around. Yeah but if he’s not keen on a woman with a past then you’re not really compatible, so you might as well be honest about that. Guys here say it’s about getting sex at least as early as anyone else had, but I think that’s cope. He wants someone without a past, period, and it’s only failing that he goes “oh well she has to prove that she’s attracted enough …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/23 10:59 AM
2

I don’t understand this? We’re obsessed with optimization. For some that’s optimizing their performance in some sport, or the fuel efficiency of a car, for instance as applied to sex, you’ve got your guys who are strategizing to sleep with as many women as possible, but in a case like mine where the guy is so intent on remaining virginal, it’s not a religious thing: He’s applying his obsession with optimization to his relationship, wanting it to be special simply because that’s optimal.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/23 06:34 PM
1

The offspring could be his, but they might not be, so I imagine the males are also hedging their bets by having sex with as many females as possible to make sure at least one is likely to be bearing his offspring. In a species like humans where the women request the commitment of a man who will help raise the offspring, the men will either select for premarital chastity or resist commitment heavily. Depends how far back we’re going.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/23 06:22 PM
2

Honestly a man with a low count is probably an easier find than a woman with the same. You could demand a count of zero and still find a guy. He’d probably even be attractive. With a guy who’s saving himself he’s probably not even necessarily religious either, but rather invested in maximizing the ‘specialness’ of his relationship; one thing you must understand about men, there is always some parameter in our lives we want to maximize.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/23 03:42 PM
4

No, I think in the modern day hoe behaviour is being pushed on more people who otherwise would not have had anything to do with it. That’s not to say there haven’t always been hoes, but historically it’s been women who’ve invested more into keeping men monogamous than the other way around. Men have always had more anxiety around female promiscuity, though; if a man cheats and his wife doesn’t feel like leaving him over it she still has a chance to try to convince him to turn around. If a woman c…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/23 05:21 PM
0

We’ll set aside the issue of getting your foot in the door for a second; I know it’s the biggest obstacle as men just don’t have any safe avenues to approach a woman, but let’s assume he’s past that point. My experience has been thus: You get to know her, she likes you, you make arrangements to get intimate. Now, as a man who posts to this godforsaken forum, you may have some level of aversion to a relationship with a woman who’s gone through a hoe phase, as she has, or maybe you’re a relatively…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/23 05:09 PM
-2

If we’re speaking technically, I did have that kind of experience long before ever losing mine because I was doing it in lieu of sex. But I was also saving sex for marriage, so someone in your position still wouldn’t have been interested. Now I’m divorced and I can honestly say I have more experience with that than I do with sex, though, so if I ever meet someone who would prefer I have experience with that, how much sex I’ve had isn’t the question for her to ask me.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/23 02:28 PM
5

I mean, I have a preference for it, so if you want someone like me, there’s your incentive. If you don’t want someone like me, I don’t see the point in worrying about my standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/23 07:56 PM
2

oh I completely agree; I don’t think any guy would seriously advocate trying to negotiate his partner into it, rather than leave and find either someone more interested or (I think is as least as likely) someone who’s never done it and never will.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 05:53 PM
3

Having options will do that. I mean, ultimately I wouldn’t give the women who I’m able to attract the time of day if women to the attractiveness standards I could get all those years ago were still interested, but it’s loneliness; I may not even be attracted enough to her to be physically capable of sex, but if I turn down the hookup I miss out on kissing and bare-skin contact, which I’m frankly starved for.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 05:30 PM
6

I’ll be honest, I think at least one of the perspectives in this discussion that stands to be taken into account is that of the guys who don’t want to forego an experience that their partner did not. By which I mean, I highly doubt that many guys are all that interested in anal except for the fact that they’ll be jealous if they’re with someone long-term who’s done as much and they never have. These guys don’t want anal; If they found someone who’s never done it and who wanted them long-term the…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 05:17 PM
11

If the “why” is that she’s not attracted to him, then he should, and I think I’m agreeing with you here, not negotiate, but in fact just leave. A relationship is wasted on someone who isn’t attracted to you. Now, where this could be spun as ‘negotiation’ is if she wants to keep him badly enough that she offers to do it in an attempt to stop him leaving. Again, trying to negotiate here is a disrespect of boundaries; he should stick to his decision and leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 04:58 PM
6

eh, I can sympathize from a male perspective; I had options in my earlier 20s the likes of which I simply don’t now, and I enjoyed things then that I don’t want to do with the women I’m able to date now because I’m not really as attracted to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 04:50 PM
0

Bullet-point answer for you: I don’t really want to wife up someone with a history of any kind to begin with; I’ve had one marriage fail already and I won’t be convinced into another unless my unreasonable standards are met. I don’t want anal. I just don’t. It grosses me out. Whenever I’ve been told by a woman she “tried something and didn’t like it,” she’s later just proposed doing it anyway. Like I didn’t even ask. If I for some reason remarry, and she wants something that I’ve tried and didn’…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/23 01:49 PM
0

Women and men as long as they are single and not hurting anyone in the process, they are allowed to follow their hearts and do whatever they want. So she’s allowed to have sex on a first date, and I’m allowed to decide that I don’t want to marry her. Glad we agree
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/23 08:42 AM
1

I’m more on the Brian end; too socially awkward to make anything resembling an approach but my looks do receive compliments. The thing that both Brian and Brad have working against them is knowing when to invest more than a simple cold approach. Whether a woman is into you or not she has an expectation that you’ll take the lead in steering the conversation toward a date, hookup, or whatever. That comes to bite you because you literally don’t know if you’re pestering someone who’s not interested …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/23 06:31 PM
4

It’s a lifetime commitment for something that’s not worth your whole life. What you’re describing might be an ok arrangement for a couple of weeks, but a lifetime? Really?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/23 06:23 PM
2

You’re right on the money; “Traditional” in any circle I’ve seen it used is no more, no less than a couple who’ve both saved sex for marriage, or the guy is looking for a woman who has, and he himself is at least low N. Women’s work? Man’s work? Gender roles? The lives out grandparents had? Nah, fuck all that, mate; I just want sex to be special between us.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 03:25 PM
1

I don’t get the obsession with playing ‘gotcha’ over “oh you’re a straight man or you’re a lesbian woman, you should be into this transgender woman” I’m not physically attracted to every woman; do we need a new term because it’s not strictly ‘straight’ to be selective about which women you’re into? Because the way people talk about this makes it seem like ‘straight’ is by definition an interest in anyone and everyone who asks to be referred to as a ‘woman’. Contextualize this outside of the whol…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 11:54 AM
2

They’re consuming content with subjects who meet a high standard of appearing as though they’d been born female. Meeting the same in real life just isn’t that likely.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 10:41 AM
3

Although I’m unaware of how trans people usually approach dating, Assuming they could be more willing and open to dating any one and are less pickier than broken Due to being genetically male? Fair assumption, couldn’t tell you whether it actually tracks. is it a viable solution to the raising dating standards set by modern day social media etc especially when it comes to what is considered as attractive as men? What, that every average guy just start pursuing MtF transitioneers? Because I’m pre…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 01:48 AM
4

How so? I literally said a breadwinner wife is great until she starts disrespecting you for not being ‘masculine’ enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/23 12:27 AM
4

I mean, the article you linked seems to suggest that these ‘Ick’s are a defensive mechanism by women who don’t want to get close to someone for fear of heartbreak, and a lot of these icks seem to be things that take someone off a pedestal and make them seem more human. There’s a phenomenon that’s directly opposite of this, the name of which escapes me; you’ll see someone slip up, in some way, maybe they trip, or drop something, anything that takes your mindset off of this person being an idealiz…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 11:57 PM
10

Ha! Well, hot take coming through; I think if the breadwinner women are less likeable, it’s because of the resentment they’re showing toward their lower-earning husbands Because I’ve never met a man who wouldn’t be pleased to be with a woman who’s successful, provided she ticked all the other boxes in terms of what he’s looking for. The problems only arise once the disrespect starts pouring in.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 11:32 PM
3

I hate to make a generalization but also wouldn’t real traditional women be against casual sex with foreign men and marrying out? Yeah, by my experience most of the men saying they’re looking for ‘traditional women’ are looking for no such thing; they want an equal partner in a marriage that looks largely like the ones you’d see post-feminism, but they want it to be with someone who chose to save sex for marriage. Because at the end of the day, a marriage is an agreement to be someone’s official…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 11:24 PM
1

Learned Mandarin pretty much to fluency, though I’m rusty now. I always recommend passport bros to learn the language, English only gets someone so far.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 10:53 PM
2

I mean it’s only since I’ve been here that I’ve seen any real complaints about it either. When I went to China I would straight up admit I was going because I didn’t think I could find anyone who’d want to marry me here and the worst backlash I ever got was “sure you could.”
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 10:46 PM
1

Probably not now, it isn’t. I mean I’m here out of a divorce after spending some years married to someone I met there, as a passport bro. The point stands, though; I was there to capitalize on the charm that came with being a foreigner, it was only for my abundance of options that I could pick someone as reserved as I was looking for; I was of course very young at the time and didn’t pick optimally for what I ultimately wanted, hence the failure of that marriage. It’s the reason I do kind of cri…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 10:34 PM
1

well certainly there would be a correlation between traditionalist attitudes and a country’s economic prosperity; The option is always open to go to poorer places where the women have expectations put on them, but even going to poorer countries most passport bros are moving to big cities and selecting for middle-class women who absolutely grew up in a culture that could have pushed them either toward waiting for marriage or being less traditional and just happened to choose the former. The thing…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 10:06 PM
3

It’s a bit of both, I think. The guys are absolutely going to East Asia to capitalize on the value of being a waiguoren, a dayuhan, or a gaijin; that’s what possesses them to uproot their lives for greener pastures: Using the exotic charm to get what they can’t at home. Any guy who tells you it’s all about finding traditional women, though, is telling half-truths. You go somewhere you’re guaranteed popularity, you can absolutely select for traditionalist traits in a woman, but these guys aren’t …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 09:47 PM
1

I think the reason women are so quick on the ‘exploitation’ accusation is because they’re really invested into this idea that a romance has to be this effortless, predestined thing, and their experience largely centres around waiting around to be approached by the perfect potential partner. So when you get men here strategizing about ‘oh well women like exotic men, you’ll have a better time if you go where you’re exotic,’ or god forbid ‘the women’s attitudes over there are more similar to ours, …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 08:31 PM
0

The latter, but they’d have to be my biological kids, so it would have to happen at least a couple of times for pregnancy purposes. If you’re telling me I’m adopting, or even worse, that they’re her kids and not mine, you can sign me up for bachelor life right now, even if I can’t attract women for the life of me. By ‘anyone I want’ do you mean that in this scenario I’m so insanely irresistible that I’m guaranteed a ‘yes’ any time I ask, no matter if my approach is awkward or cringey?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 04:47 PM
2

they would’ve if they could’ve. If you’re a man who spent his 20s trying and failing to settle down with someone who, like you, had no experience, and you’re now on the cusp of 30 and still have no experience, you’re not going to want to settle for someone with a past because that’s a lifetime commitment to your first and only; you want the same back.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 03:03 PM
5

I mean I was a virgin getting married at 21. 5 years of fierce loyalty on my end because I didn’t want to ever be an unmarried non-virgin and putting up with tonnes of red flags that only started showing up after the wedding brought me to 26; divorce became inevitable, the past 3 years have not been productive in terms of meeting women, so now I’m 29 and still as keen on marrying an experienced high-N woman as I was at 19: not at all, that is. I came out of the gates emotionally mature and ready…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/23 02:53 AM
1

Which means half of them have kids, and a percentage of those are single moms, and they make up the minority of women who have any issue with age gaps
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 04:04 PM
0

Let me ask who do you think are the women who have a major issue with this? Momcels who can’t get a man to commit because they have their own kids in tow. The men their own age who are still single are late bloomers who don’t have kids yet and who are going for women who likewise have no kids and whose level of experience roughly matches their own. These single mom types have no issue seeking out the young, inexperienced men who think they’re lucky to be getting a woman’s attention, even if it’s…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 02:20 PM
2

If you did not find her attractive, what's up because you were intimidated perhaps? sounds like a bad faith question leadership is attractive in a woman. You won’t find leadership in a female CEO or whatever, though. ‘girlbosses’ are usually just cutthroats who bully their way through the ranks. which, I’ll grant you, is kind of intimidating. I don’t wanna get involved with someone whose whole personality is just bullying.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/23 02:10 PM
1

but isn't the best predictor of future behavior past behavior? Well, I waited until marriage, remained fiercely loyal, and only divorced once she admitted to cheating. Good track record, right? I’m the perfect guy to look for commitment from? Or… I care(d) so deeply about virginity that I see no difference between N 1 and N 100 so now in the absence of my purity I’m seeking a hoe phase that Im only not having because of social awkwardness and you’ll be fighting an uphill battle to turn me into t…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 09:27 PM
–

Sex for validation, having your hair played with because it actually feels nice. With the number of men who’ve got themselves rubbed raw and sensitivity destroyed these days I’ll be surprised if that’s even a hot take.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/23 12:31 PM
2

Well I know what my experience has been, wanting to keep an N of only one, ever, and not getting that because there’s unfortunately no accounting for other people if they want to leave you. The tingles from when the experience is brand-new, no longer happen. I have no interest in committing to a woman knowing she’ll never be the one who was able to give me that, but I might be swayed if I can be that for her. So yes, I assume that connection is lacking and cannot take a woman’s word for it if sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/23 03:56 PM
1

What's next, men who care about bodycount have little dicks, can't please a woman, are insecure? I never understood making a point of this like it’s some sort of own. Like let’s assume it’s true. “You want someone without experience so that she’ll be satisfied with your lacklustre skill.” As opposed to someone who’ll be disappointed? Are we shaming a man for wanting to make the woman in his life happy?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/23 12:09 PM
3

I’ve got several reasons I would wait: I wanted virginity for myself so that I could give it to someone worthy of it. After having that fucked up for me I wouldn’t want to fuck that up for someone else, especially if she was considering I could potentially be that person for her. Sex is only worth the validation that’s printed on it and I’m prone to sex-related injuries anyway. The gradual buildup would help in getting closer, which would potentially alleviate the issues I’ve had with emotional …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/23 08:50 PM
17

Ever since post-divorce when I’ve been on OLD my entire option base has been overweight. I never considered it a dealbreaker and got along with them just fine, but as soon as the clothes would come off there’d be issues. I could never really get into it, and it would more often than not fail to happen because I’d be that turned off. Maybe I’m shallow but it’s not like I was going around refusing these women. My preferences just aren’t tuned to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/23 05:26 PM
2

Looking back on the few successes that I’ve had, which were almost a decade ago now, it was never the shyness that was a deal-breaker. Did being a shy little bitch-boy limit my successes with women? Well, yes, of course. Is it even more limiting to me now? Absolutely. Why is that? We’ll see, now I’m trying to meet people through dating apps. The mental block keeping me from trying to escalate with women, or when I try, doing so smoothly, is a detriment because these apps flood women with people …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/23 02:54 PM
1

The least attractive women have the highest standards. If you’re struggling with women, try approaching the ones you were afraid to because ‘if the ones I approach now don’t want me, she definitely won’t, I mean look at her.’
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 07:18 PM
20

Yknow I keep seeing this discussed on PPD that younger women don’t like older men. But the women I know in real life (yes, even I touch grass every now and then) straight up say they have a preference for older men. …except the older women, who seem to be more into younger men? I dunno, talking to people in person I’d swear women's preference was just for any age gap in which the two parties involved are on opposite sides of 30 or so. But if you’re a man who’s had few enough options to still be …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 06:34 PM
3

I’m a twig and with overweight women there’s too much to wade through to get anything working. Closest you can get is with the woman on top but even then the damn thing won’t reach. It’s the most baffling mystery I’ve yet to solve.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 06:20 PM
1

I don’t know where you’re getting your power differential here, but if physical strength is your excuse for why a 30-year-old man shouldn’t date a woman of 20, I think you’d need to reverse that dynamic: 20 year old Cosmic wasn’t physically fit, by any measure, but he could run circles around 29 year old Cosmic.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 05:26 PM
3

Reflecting on it now, my greatest dating successes all came when I was highly inexperienced and awkward. And acting inexperienced and awkward now gives me better outcomes than acting natural. I think there must be some degree of charm to it. 🤷‍♀️Either that or I’ve never had any charisma and women forgive that, but only when I don’t pretend I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 05:21 PM
1

I get jealous of exactly one person pulling prettier women than me, and that’s younger me. Anyone else is pretty irrelevant
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 05:16 PM
2

If she/he already in the same boat ,and wanna work with you about it ,its better than someone with low n count that dosent admit there is a problem. True, but it’s generally the ones who are waiting who would even admit to there being a problem. I have the option of just not pursuing a relationship so if a woman decides she wants me it’s on her to convince me to give her a chance.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 03:07 PM
1

why can’t I make a choice to be straight or gay on a whim? How is that not a choice? I mean you absolutely can; whether or not you enjoy it is due to factors beyond your control. I could shack up with a man right now if I wanted. It wouldn’t be fun for me, because I don’t have that biology. Personally though I think even the terms ‘straight’ or ‘gay’ aren’t the most useful labels in the world; I’ve only ever had an interest in women, but that interest will never extend to every woman. Not even c…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 10:11 AM
2

So yeah its damging for both genders Thank you; I can hardly participate in any of these discussions because people assume that no man with a preference for low-N thinks anything of his own. Younger me absolutely made some mistakes that lead to not being virginal now, and current me suffers from lack of feeling particularly invested in a relationship because of it. That started being a problem after an N of only 1, and it may not have gotten worse, but it certainly hasn’t gotten better. Why, the…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/23 09:48 AM
1

Speaking to that, honestly if the choice was: 24 year old or 40 year old who, through the miracles of science, had been biologically age-reversed to 24, both with 0 N and the 40 year old also somehow regained her fertility: Still the 40 year old.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 11:47 PM
1

They have the same body count. Equally fertile somehow Yeah, it’s A. Not even a contest. In-her-prime looks, same fertility, N-count is in theory whatever I’m comfortable with, and all this packaged into someone who will be emotionally mature despite having no more baggage than option B? Where’s the catch, sir? Where’s the catch?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/23 05:45 PM
1

I can guarantee my presence on those things isn’t hurting anyone’s odds. matches are rare and the most responsive women tend to be overweight, single moms, etc. I’d advise most men to get off of them, they hurt your self-esteem, make you think you’re in a lower looks bracket than you are. Like I said, the extent of my success meeting women in person was never that I could attract many, but the few I could pull in person were hot. If I managed, anyone can.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 11:31 PM
2

Yknow what, it took me forever to come to this realization, but despite everyone I know insisting I’m better looking now than I was at 20, the quality of women I’m able to grab the interest of has fallen off a cliff. What changed? Ok, age, obviously, but back then I met women in person, now I’m on an app, and it’s not the age of the women that’s the issue, the 31 year old I attracted as a Uni freshman was slender while the 24 year olds showing me interest now are far from. It’s the apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 09:06 PM
1

Age: 29 Would have lost it at 18, but nerves got in the way; ended up doing ‘everything but’ Decided after this point to wait until marriage, had a couple (count: two or three) of encounters in the following years, none of which cumulated in full-on sex. Married at 21. Extremely dead bedroom marriage. That ended in 2019, a painful divorce considering I made the decision to wait. Decided to try for a hoe phase, so I got on the OLD. Resulted in a small number of meet-ups, but I really wasn’t attra…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 04:41 PM
1

I came looking for someone to make this exact point because it was starting to concern me that nobody was acknowledging the real elephant in this room. I have a friend who said it best; “She’s asking a million questions but really they’re all the same: ‘why aren’t you a woman?’.” I’m a guy who wanted, badly, to have a lifetime N of exactly 1. My ex wife had other plans, and there’s no accounting for other people, so my options were bring that number up again or never have sex. Now, getting laid …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 11:48 AM
3

Men who like purity wouldn't mind waiting for sex. Most would probably PREFER waiting a little. This. If marrying a virgin is beneficial because you’re more special to her then being one yourself is beneficial because you’ll derive more enjoyment out of your marriage, which is what you’ll probably want because it’s a lifetime commitment. If you’re a high-N man with a virgin preference what I can all but guarantee happened was that your first choice was to wait, she left you, and before you could…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 09:26 PM
1

Not for nothing, but in my experience sharing life stories with men, ideological consistency is what yields high-n men who only want virgins: He wants a life as a couple who are each other’s only. He waits. Loses it to some woman he’s optimistic about, she leaves him. After grieving he wants to try again, but he can’t exactly take it back. Somewhere along the way he’s reassured that women won’t care. He continues on caring as he always did, but does he remain chaste in the meantime to keep his N…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 05:30 PM
1

If I held relationships to the standards set by my maternal grandparents, there’d be no other relationship on the face of the planet that wasn’t a flop. Completely inseparable for over 70 years, died within months of eachother, were making googley eyes at eachother until grandpa’s last day. It was the gold standard relationship as far as I’m concerned.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/23 11:36 AM
4

I think if you’re a man dating an unattractive woman, either you think she’s the best you can do, or she’s, in fact, quite attractive specifically to you. Just as a matter of personal experience, I’ve got what many would consider strange tastes; having interest in women who others don’t really find all that attractive. I’ve also been involved with women who I don’t find attractive, because I wasn’t getting attention from the women I did. If you’re an attractive guy who can have basically any wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/23 05:35 PM
1

I know a lot of men don’t like condoms I might be a weirdo but I’m so squeamish about bodily fluids that foregoing one because I actually want to reproduce is gonna be an adjustment. STD fears also make it the better option, of course.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/23 04:27 PM
3

I’m 29. On average with a woman my age I’m looking at a huge experience gap; The single moms, the women with extensive pasts; That’s not what I want. If she’s got less experience than me (which equals essentially none) then my age isn’t too old. It’s just that at my age I can’t be with someone as old as I am and reliably expect that the relationship is as special and unique to her as it is to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/23 02:23 AM
2

I’m approaching 30, spent years in a marriage with someone who wouldn’t even touch me, and have had such little luck with women since that I spent a year with someone I wasn’t attracted to to the point of physically not being able to get intimate because I thought I could do no better; only to leave because I couldn’t handle trying and failing to have sex. Now, that last girl would tell me constantly about all the women who are allegedly throwing themselves at me, and would not believe me when I…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 06:30 PM
1

😒Manipulation, really? Well setting aside the obvious point of ‘that’s terrible’, if you’re trying to manipulate people you do incredibly well to have relationship experience because most of your prospects on OLD are people who say they don’t want hookups but think you can just sleep your way into an LTR; having the experience to fake that is the definition of knowing how to manipulate someone. But honestly, don’t even
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/23 07:33 PM
1

“if you are Chad she’ll want to try anal, if you’re not she’ll just come up with excuses not to” Being a man who pretty vehemently doesn’t want to do that, the more I think of it, a more attractive woman would have an easier time convincing me, so I guess the principle applies I’ve also got anecdotal evidence of women deciding very quickly they want to do something that they’ve since said was off the table, but I’m not a Chad, so I really doubt the main factor is attractiveness, necessarily. Tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/23 05:24 PM
1

No man cares what women do. We just have standards for what type of woman we’ll commit to. If you don’t meet them, more power to you, nobody’s mad at you for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 12:20 PM
–

Not everyone who wants to have kids can find a partner to have them with. We literally can’t go personal liberty on mate choice while at the same time enforcing reproduction. If we fine people for not having kids while letting them choose their partners you’re essentially introducing an ugly tax.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/23 04:27 PM
3

Since the second woman’s never loved anyone, though, being just another notch to her isn’t as big an L as being with the woman who has. If you were forced to take one, that is
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/23 06:28 PM
2

If the second twin has no diseases, she wins. Single moms are out; I really don’t wanna raise someone else’s. Prior commitment means the first twin is likely to be pining for some other guy. Sure, you’re not special necessarily to the party girl, but you’ll never be the first twins ex-husband, and that’s even sadder.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/23 06:21 PM
1

I think almost all men value personality and compatibility over looks. It’s to a fault, actually; men will get with women they don’t find attractive because of their great personalities and then be disappointed when that lack of attraction stops them from getting properly intimate. Once a guy knows better he’ll usually set a minimum looks requirement. It’s a fairly low bar, you just have to be bangable.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/23 04:46 AM
10

Women have told me stories that indicate what kind of strategies they use with ‘husband material’: In most cases it does involve sleeping with him as quickly as possible to try to hook him, but sometimes she’ll make him wait. When does he have to wait? Well, it’s when she doesn’t feel that other women are desperate to hook him before she does, i.e. if he’s not attractive. Sleeping with someone immediately always risks getting pumped and dumped, but if the guy is attractive there’s really no way …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/23 09:09 PM
4

I’ve seen articles calling the idea of a ‘friend zone’ misogynist fantasy, so I took a look to see what they meant by that; in short, they were arguing ‘in all cases where you get rejected by your friend with whom you wanted to escalate to a relationship, it’s never because you took too long to make a move, you’re just ugly and low value and she doesn’t want you.’ That reads as fairly angry, but it also doesn’t line up with something I always hear women say, which is ‘forming a relationship with…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/23 04:39 PM
2

ah, yes. I have no success with women because I’m “too hot” please continue to stroke my ego
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/22 03:23 AM
-3

If it’s mental health we’re talking about, though, we can’t be telling men that women like sex as much as men because ‘as much as men’ implies ‘will take it whenever it’s offered, regardless of the guy being handsome or average. A man who isn’t attractive enough to make a woman want to sleep with him isn’t disgusting, necessarily, and by telling him “you have to have something seriously wrong with you not to be getting sex” you’re doing unnecessary damage to him
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/22 01:00 AM
3

kissing like a labrador ouch, I felt that one
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/22 12:27 AM
2

If I could change mine to any value magically? 0. Only sex I’ve ever had ergo best sex I’ve ever had is what I went for in my first marriage and a second chance at that would be worth using a genie wish. What would I tell them if given the option to lie? Well there’s no getting around admitting being divorced so I’d probably inflate it; standing out as special is ironically enough easier against a large backdrop of others than next to one or two others so giving too high of an estimate could all…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/22 02:38 AM
1

In fairness, you’d only be lying to hookups to get your foot in the door so that when you meet a woman you actually want to be with seriously you can tell her the truth and it won’t be a number that makes her not want you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/22 01:12 AM
1

Oh absolutely Well, Fu Hao was a top general in the Shang King’s army around 1200 BC, and in 189 AD Himiko was the sovereign leader of Yamatai-koku. And since history always moves forward in exactly one direction that means that the whole of Earth has had perfect gender equality for the last 1933 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 08:15 PM
1

This just in: Most of the people getting married this year have been dating the other party for at least a year. Big shock. Where’s the divorce statistics?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 08:04 PM
1

“Men have the states the option to ban abortion so now men have to get sterilized so the births that would have been prevented by abortion continue to not happen. And if you don’t I’ll withhold casual sex from you.” The conservative guys who approve of the decision don’t care for casual sex and don’t want to be sterilized when they can just limit their sex lives to when they’re trying, or otherwise willing, to reproduce. The guys who were fucking around before and can’t depend on their offspring…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 10:43 PM
11

I wouldn’t say “worth the risk”, I’d say “low risk”. Men would prefer to approach women who seem like they’d be receptive, or at least not offended, that you’d approach them.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 10:30 PM
3

Honestly, when you’re trying to calm down your sweet-as-diabetes girlfriend who’s devastated that you’re having trouble maintaining an erection for her, “I love you for you” and “looks don’t matter” doesn’t cut it. I’ve heard dudes complain the woman in question told him to just ‘try harder’. Can’t imagine a more painful breakup, especially when her personality is spot-on perfection.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/22 07:27 PM
0

Women have been getting more promiscuous, at least visibly so, and men are just kinda rationalizing that with paternity certainty being a risk, do they really need a relationship? maybe with a virgin, if any turn up. otherwise no. Now, women with a past do still manage to trap these guys long-term, but it’s not easy for them, either and a lot of the time she’s persuading a guy who had every intention to just pump and dump.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/22 07:16 PM
1

I mean, by that definition of ‘need’ you’d be right; though Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs sets a definition that more or less describes, in tiers, the order in which people will prioritize trying to get things for themselves. What I don’t like about that hierarchy, though; he puts sex way on the bottom. below safety. Have I met people who act like it’s actually down there? yes. Do I think it’s that low? absolutely not; nobody is concerned about trying to get laid who isn’t fed, clothed and shelter…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/22 06:39 PM
11

As a former passport bro? Foreign women marry white men because they think we’re more “liberal” than what they can get at home. They still want you to be a breadwinner, of course, but they don’t want to be doing all the housewife stuff. ‘In white countries, the husband does all that, too! Teehee.’ You will end up marrying a psychopath. Either that ends badly or you luck out and she’s the good kind of crazy. Yeah, you’re more attractive there than here, but that’s only if you’re attractive. The a…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 01:26 AM
2

I fancy myself a decent home cook, I think I’d make for a good house husband. I’d be just as satisfied being home an income, though. I guess if I ever meet an attractive business woman who makes a fortune and is specifically in the market for a house husband, I’d bite.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/22 06:58 PM
12

I mean I hear it and think “400 pound woman being shared by several scrawny-looking men, most of whom would prefer a thinner woman to themselves and could probably have that, but their self-esteem is in a ditch somewhere.”
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/22 01:02 PM
2

Maybe it’s because I’m taller than most of the people I meet anyway, but it’s rare that I even see height, much less select for it. I only really notice if someone is incredibly short or taller than I am, and even then my brain just registers people as being as tall as I am when they’re far from it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/22 10:39 AM
1

agreed: Say for the sake of argument your girl propositions another guy, attempting to cheat, and he turns her down and tells you about it. You’re still leaving that woman for being a cheater; he could have taken the offer he hasn’t saved the relationship by refusing.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/22 12:10 PM
0

I’m sure any husband would be pleased to have a wife also bringing in an income, though. It’s not like there’s a strong preference for stay at home moms
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/22 05:56 PM
0

Giving up a career isn’t a great measure, I don’t think; I can assure you men are out there trying to advance in their career only because they want to make life better for their wives who they’re oh so in love with
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/22 05:49 PM
6

The BB is the stable guy who wasn’t attractive enough to have his fun in his 20s, right? What happens when he feels like he missed out and takes his stability to go hook up with women who think they can reel him in? Is a BB really stable?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 03:12 PM
1

iirc those apps try to show you people within your ‘popularity bracket’, which would be fine except women are swiping honestly and men are just going bibibibibibibibi honestly randomize who it shows you with the exception of top priority to people who’ve liked you. Find some way to encourage honest swiping from men: If you match this lady will you even attempt to talk to her, that kind of thing. Also, minimum character limit on your initial message to someone. I know it’s intimidating to say mor…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 09:24 AM
1

Same thing I do now; get crippling social anxiety at the thought of approaching a woman and just wait til one is so overwhelmed by my looks that she puts in the legwork for me, which no woman will do. I tell you, women would rather miss out on the perfect man than waltz up to him and risk rejection and that puts men in the same position of shyness at the bottom rings of SMV/RMV even when they’re 6’3 and attractive
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 05:12 PM
-1

I have to disagree with your assessment that post-wall women aren’t desperate, but that they’d go for low SMV guys is conjecture based on something men are observing and misinterpreting: I don’t see where the need is to predict that some day, years in the future, the 20 somethings rejecting you now will be old and desperate and give you the time of day: 30-40 year old MILFs exist right now. They walk among us! Are they easy? Yeah kinda? Are they into you? Your mileage may vary but if your proble…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 08:26 PM
39

Meanwhile, studies also show that autistic women are more likely to have been in relationships than neurotypical men. As for autistic men, only half have ever held a girl's hand, and most have never had sex. As far as my experience go, particularly on OLD, Autistic women are at the advantage of not “getting” that it’s the “man’s job” to approach. That guy you like too shy to message? No worries, you’re too autistic to not just send the first thing that comes to your head, make a comment that’ll …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 09:58 AM
-1

Yeah but so are the women. You reach top20% of men that only gives you a chance with women in the bottom rungs of attractiveness. That’s great if you just want a companion but being in the top 20% of men will naturally incline your standards higher than that; some good a partner is when you can’t get it up for her
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/22 04:18 PM
1

y’know, I’m on board with taking precautions around those types of men, but when I think ‘socially awkward’, there’s those crazies and then there’s regular shy guys. the crazies aren’t shy, not in the least. You’ve got to have mad confidence to build up the audacity to harass people like that. I wouldn’t lump quiet men who don’t approach women in with them, and I wouldn’t try to talk a woman out of approaching a guy she liked who was sure as hell not going to make a move because ‘awkward men are…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 09:59 PM
1

The reason evolution improves genetic fitness isn’t because women are selecting good genes; genetic fitness just ensures that you don’t keel over and die before a woman has a chance to select you. Whatever traits you have that help get you laid after that, nature has no way of knowing if those will help you survive; what’s sexy today is whatever was all women had to choose from 10,000 years ago because the alternative was dead.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 07:09 PM
3

the "wanna smash" approach is an example of a good communication as he doesn't weasel around with words like the dreadful "nice guy", this is until the same "Lets fuck" tactic is adapted by the guy they don't like. Then directness is lewd, creepy and objectifying. Remember; if it’s a dating app then she had to give you the approval of a swipe right before you had permission to talk to her: Just ask; if she didn’t want you to ask her that question she wouldn’t have swiped after reading ‘here for …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 03:14 PM
0

Imagine bitching at two grown adults for having a consensual relationship
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 04:37 PM
0

Imagine bitching at two grown adults for having a consensual relationship
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 04:37 PM
2

The guys I see around with attractive girlfriends are average as all hell. Usually when a guy who’s got anything going for him manages to date a woman, she’s got something wrong with her. Riddle me that
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 04:25 PM
1

The dudes who you were willing to bed were good at seducing women, and you didn’t invite them back when it turned out they sucked. They probably went on to rinse and repeat that process with other women and had plenty. The guy who had one lucky break and then you invited him back for more of the same couldn’t go on to seduce more women very efficiently. Like, there’s other women, is my point here.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 04:21 PM
1

As a guy it’s not like I ever get hookups, but my rule is ‘hands only’. I’ve never been called a buzzkill because with a good set of fingers you can actually get a woman to cum.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 09:52 AM
1

By then, the sweet guys that I wasn't attracted to when I was younger started to mature and grow their careers and (quite honestly) show more potential than any of the fboys I had hooked up with. Those guys who are only now starting to show potential after years of no success with women? Or maybe they were sweet enough to marry young and are now divorced because they jumped into it before they were successful enough to sustain it? Why yes, I also enjoy trying to get commitment after the end of m…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 07:08 PM
3

Myself and another similarly shy male classmate were told the other day that, being so silent all the time, we were ‘intimidating’. Both of us insist we don’t approach because we lack the confidence, which is pretty much the opposite of what should be intimidating, really. Makes me wonder if the best looking among us who aren’t getting dates due to shyness is because they and the women they’d prefer to approach are mutually afraid of rejection. Honestly many of us don’t want to face the conseque…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 09:26 PM
5

men are swiping on anything they'd stick there dick in Even the ones they wouldn’t. We don’t even look; when you match with a guy that notification is the first time he’s seeing you.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 06:25 PM
2

A good number of men who don’t have the opportunity for relationships now would if women would approach them. These men are good-looking but I have crippling social anxiety from rejection earlier in life, before they were worth anything and fear HR getting on their backs if they so much as say ‘hi’ to a woman. I don’t know if those guys are necessarily joining these commiseration communities where they turn to violent misogyny, but I can see where a man like this would find validation in one of …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 05:52 PM
6

Like none of this stuff is unacceptable to the right girl, but they seem to think most women are going to want to do this stuff. And most women do NOT want to do this stuff. I think that’s the bigger problem instead of any individual acts. Like, you can choose not to watch content with any of these acts if you find it objectionable; the content won’t ameliorate you to uncomfortable acts just because it exists out there. The attitude of “this should be expected”, though: I’m a man whose met women…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 06:59 PM
1

Honestly I don’t know where this notion that women are losing their shit over age gaps comes from; I see 8-10 year gaps or larger in relationships all the time and nobody really bats an eye. Now granted they’re less 20 and 30 and more 24 and 34, but still
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 01:17 AM
8

I honestly don’t get what problem OP thinks “women lowering their standards” would solve? Like my standards are low, but if a woman who just barely met my standards and one who’s drop-dead gorgeous with all kinds of good qualities both insisted I go with them, who am I gonna pick? It’s literally “behave like you have no options, for me specifically” at that point
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 08:38 PM
1

Even that I don’t think really influences men’s standards too much. I mean it’s hard to know exactly but from experience I’m confident asserting that men have no trouble be extremely attracted to women who don’t live up to the manufactured perfection of media personalities who they think are beautiful. Guys are plenty attracted to real women who they see every day. Contrast that with women; I mean most men I know who’ve been complimented on their looks; they’ve been compared in the same breath t…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 07:19 PM
10

I dunno? Who did say anything about them? You wouldn’t lower your standards if you didn’t have to, and if you have to for lack of options then you’re not controlling who you’re attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 07:08 PM
1

For what it’s worth, if dudes’ standards were shaped by what’s in mass media we’d find a lot of women attractive that we absolutely don’t. You can put anorexic, manly-looking women with no tits on the cover of vogue all you want, doesn’t change the fact that men strongly prefer average, everyday women to them. When a man settles for a 1/10, he lacks attraction to her because she’s less attractive than the girl next door, not because she doesn’t look like whichever ugly bitch won sexiest woman of…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 06:56 PM
18

If you had hundreds of extremely attractive women throwing themselves at you, would you train yourself to be attracted to overweight women just because ‘it’s the right thing to do’? Also, is your point even that people can control what they’re attracted to? How does that follow from ‘prison effect’? If lower standards come from lack of options, that’s not people controlling who they’re attracted to; a woman can’t help it if the guy she wants wants her back. And if she could, why would she?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 06:45 PM
1

I think as far as male attraction goes, there are fewer (maybe even just one) ideal female body types, but with much more leeway to still be considered attractive if you don’t meet it. Women, on the other hand, are attracted to a much wider range of male types, but have higher standards as to how attractive a guy needs to be in terms of pure percentage points before he’s worth pursuing.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 12:47 PM
3

“Taking what you can get” is the attitude that leaves a man with an overweight woman who he can’t get it up for whining because he keeps making excuses to avoid sex, and then if you leave her because you just can’t keep up the facade of being attracted to her, everyone knows you dumped her over her looks, they won’t believe any other excuse you make up, and your own family will shame you for the rest of your life for letting go of ‘such a nice girl’. So yeah, dropping your standards is a death s…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 05:49 PM
3

The cold hard reality for a lot of the lonely men who persist about the promiscuity of women on this subreddit are doing so out of a place of insecurity and ahem not measuring up or being personally satisfied with their partner. The implication that men shouldn’t be insecure is pretty patriarchy-tier to begin with. If I’m not likely to measure up my fear isn’t even unfounded. I don’t think I should be shamed into banging a woman I’ll end up disappointing, for her sake. You cannot expect a woman …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 03:40 PM
2

At those numbers she’s hardly picking one definitive ‘best’ to compare you to, but what you are being compared to is variety. I still don’t see the point of insulting men saying ‘you’re afraid you won’t measure up’ because…YES, that’s exactly the problem. If I’m stupid enough to sign up for a relationship, I’m signing up for an arrangement where I’m appreciated and if I don’t think a woman can give me that I won’t commit.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 02:55 PM
5

If those behaviours continue to be rewarded, they’ll continue. You reward good behaviour, if men are rewarded for toxic behaviour they’ll think it’s good.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 12:27 AM
3

Well if other women are sleeping with men who exhibit traits you deem toxic, there’s not much you can do without trying to police women’s sexuality. Women are free to accept or reject whoever they like for sex, and if you’re a man and certain behaviours make women want to sleep with you, you’ll think, understandably so, that those behaviours make you likeable and are good behaviours
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 11:05 PM
7

When a man exhibiting a particular attitude attracts women to want to sleep with him; He’s happy to be having sex, they’re happy to be having sex; it makes the feminists who clamour about how that behaviour is toxic seem like complete nutjobs: It doesn’t hurt anyone, it just works when you’re trying to get laid. Telling a man to stop doing what attracts women because it perpetuates the already in place beliefs of larger society just sounds like you’re policing men’s sexuality.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 05:48 PM
69

Years ago I had some male feminist lecture out into the online void about how men are picking up women with some sort of ‘toxic masculine’ behaviour that was unacceptable and we need to stop doing that. I pointed out that hey, when these guys pick up these women there’s no coercion or anything involved; women are responding to that behaviour and choosing to sleep with men who exhibit it; why would men stop doing what works? Women can’t be that bothered by it if they’ll sleep with a guy who’s lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 05:25 PM
0

I mean, I think if your aesthetic taste weren’t in line with what a particular ethnic group tends to look like, you wouldn’t be saying ‘I don’t date black women’ as a rule. You’d still assess people’s looks on an individual basis
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 03:42 PM
2

In fact, guys shouldn't care about women's sex lives either other than the woman that they are dating either. You could be anti-hookup culture, but still respect what others do with their sex lives, and then filter out the ones you would want to date. Essentially, yeah. But as soon as I’m asked whether I’d be interested in a woman if xyz, and I say no, women who don’t even want me and don’t even satisfy criteria xyz tell me I’m being exclusionary and terrible. I don’t get it at all; unless you w…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 12:10 PM
0

Someone with homophobic beliefs isn’t going to date someone of their own gender even if they literally are closeted gays. The moment a woman demands an explanation for my disinterest in dating other men to make sure it’s because I’m genuinely heterosexual and not because I’m a bigoted self-hating gay, because she’s got no time for bigots, is the moment I throw my arms up and go ‘this one’s not even worth casual sex’
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 01:25 AM
1

OP I was responding to specified black, so I just went with the example given. I asked what would be a ‘non-racist reason’ because any reason I could think of wouldn’t actually be one that excluded as race of people as a rule; they’d be circumstantial at best
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 12:24 AM
0

I mean, if you hadn’t run into a black woman you were physically attracted to, that’s technically an explanation as to why you’ve never wanted to date one, but like I said, in such a scenario you wouldn’t say that you don’t date black women, because you wouldn’t be excluding them as a rule.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 09:33 PM
3

Overall I doubt promiscuous women struggle finding LTRs irrespective of quality but if they aim for actual quality men then they will probably be rejected In my experience the lower end of men, experience-wise, seems pretty split down the middle; you get Low-to-No N guys who won’t take a non-virgin because ‘I never got that and I’d either be jealous or grossed out that she did, or scared of being compared’, but you also get the ones who go straight for the high N women and single moms because th…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 07:07 PM
7

What would you consider a non-racist reason for a guy not to want to date black women? I mean I can maybe think of a few but if someone out-and-out says ‘I wouldn’t date a black woman’ it’s definitely not one of those reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 06:47 PM
5

Values relating to the dynamics of sex and relationships are getting more and more political, which makes the incompatibility between any given pair of people rather obvious based on party lines. Unless you’re far gone in your political leaning of choice, though, I think that’s the only real issue; I’m far too conservative to date a promiscuous woman or a woman who doesn’t want kids, and those traits are relatively predictable along party lines. I wouldn’t disqualify a woman for holding just any…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 02:12 AM
1

Women having high standards really isn’t the problem; If they had no standards, they’d still just take the best they can get, and when you’re a woman that’s effectively whoever you want. Sure, he doesn’t have to be a 10/10 in looks, but the 10/10 is interested, why pick him over the 9/10? Could personality net me a relationship if looks weren’t a factor? Hell no, I’m a shy nerd who could maybe impress a gamer girl, but the female-to-male geek ratio is tiny, I struggle to impress them now and if …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 01:15 AM
8

I’ll chalk the failure rate from earlier marriage up to immaturity. The failure rate after, I bet, is from the likelihood that someone marrying at that age has divorced before, and still have the same things wrong with them that made it happen the first time.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 01:45 PM
3

I remember reading somewhere a writer decrying the fact that upper-class men pretend those sickly thin vogue models with no tits are attractive because it’s a ‘refined taste’ and they’d be seen as vulgar for liking decent T’n’A. She challenged the wives of rich men to hire maids with perfect double D’s to see how long it takes him to have an affair. Speaking of those models, I suppose that by even hiring them to represent the epitome of beauty some people are probably lying about what they think…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 12:32 AM
5

Eh, people who would have cheated in the past, I would wager, are opting these days to propose open relationships to their partner simply because the social stigma of the latter has fallen below that of the former.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 06:26 PM
3

you just need to have had it at some point to focus on the upper needs. By that logic, virgins don’t care about safety.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 05:49 PM
2

what does it exactly mean to treat someone like an object? See, the hardest thing about trying to define this is finding the cut-off where treating someone as a ‘means to an end’ transitions into treating them as a ‘mere means’; When you order a coffee, nobody’s asking you to really care much about the barista outside of a means for you to be served, but you’re not just going to disregard the fact that that’s a human being offering their service, and warrants different treatment from, say, a ven…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 05:39 PM
3

87% of women that moan during sex, do it to boost their partner self-esteem, not as an indication of pleasure: Ever hear women complain that men don’t moan? Cause like, as a man, can confirm that sexual pleasure doesn’t cause moaning for us, so if a lot of women wish we would ‘to let them know it’s good’, then I’d assume it’s a logically sound assumption to think that’s also their reason for doing it, and they also don’t just instinctively moan.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 02:29 AM
0

Easy solution there; just start shaming women for their preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 02:59 PM
2

wait at the finish line From the sound of it they don’t even want that; sure, they know intristically that you had to work to get where you are now, but a woman doesn’t want to even think about what it looked like before you proved yourself. You’ve got to cover it up and let her believe you came out of the womb perfect.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 02:29 PM
1

Me personally? It grosses me out. I’ve had a woman express a lot of enthusiasm to try it and I was so turned off I was visibly cringing.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/22 07:57 PM
1

For example, if Mary finds herself dating Jim and having more desire for sex than he does, If she wants more of it than she’s getting, then it’s a resource that has value to her we should not expect this couple to reverse the usual gender roles, so that she asks him out, pays for his food and entertainment, and brings him gifts, while he holds back and if necessary slaps her hand away. That does happen, though, sometimes Put more simply, Mary’s greater sexual desire may lead her to offer Jim sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/22 08:34 PM
11

Confident guys who can walk up to a stranger in a bar and exchange phone numbers minutes later are proof that a good looking guy who handles rejection well has nothing to lose by approaching women. On the flip side of that, you see very ugly men approaching women and getting branded “creeps”; doesn’t help that their social skills lend to a lot of miscommunication. What, then, about attractive men who always grew up shy? A man doesn’t know objectively if he looks good or not, and if his generally…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/22 04:17 PM
1

Men and women alike look for people with long-term potential for marriage, and men and women alike seek out good looks for sex. Realistically, they seek out good looks for marriage, too, because you can’t exactly expect to maintain a healthy marriage with someone you can’t sleep with. Now, the ability to plan for the future is easy to praise, and women’s standards are stereotyped as being only their standards for marriage; success, money, etc.. If this were true, it would demonstrate that she’s …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/22 03:02 PM
1

Why men preferring non promiscuous women is an insecurity? Men who want a virgin don’t want to be compared, and women who want experienced men want affirmation that they come out on top even when compared. It’s like men and women came to opposite conclusions from the same starting point.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/22 09:10 PM
7

Where do guys learn not to like feminism? From Feminists. They’re basically taught conspiracy theories in their gender studies classes and then shout them from microphones on the side of the road. They’re basically tinfoil hat right-wing nutjobs but for women’s issues. That’s beside the fact that they tend to reject being held to standards; hey, nothing wrong with slutting around and gaining a bunch of weight but when I don’t want to date that, don’t call it an injustice, especially if you would…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/22 06:35 PM
2

I’m assuming she loves me a lot if she’s still doing this to keep me happy, right? And attracted to me. The possible reason you’ve cited the most is a sexual disorder, preventing orgasm, so I’ll assume that’s the issue and she knows it. I wouldn’t leave, at least not right away, if it was clear from the rest of the relationship that she was loving and affectionate, and she indicated that she was happy with me. If I had reason to believe she was displeased with me I’d drop her. Now, assuming all …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 09:29 PM
54

Free reign to be unpopular? Sure I’ll bite -I’ve met women whose body fat is so concentrated in the front of their belly that it barely affects their hip-to-waist ratio and it is shocking how fat those women can get before it has all that much impact on their attractiveness. -women who are submissive all the time are boring and you only fantasize about them as a compromise because the appeal of assertive women is most evident when they pitch you ideas you’d never come up with yourself, which obv…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 06:40 PM
23

Can’t say anything definitively as a guy but more than a few woman have told me they’d slept with a guy quickly in the hopes that good sex would bleed into a commitment. Often it doesn’t work because quick sex like that gets interpreted as casual and he just goes and bangs another girl after that, but since I am a man I can confidently say that the strategy isn’t necessarily stupid, because I can tell you about a scenario where it will work from the man’s perspective; They’ll hook up. It’s casua…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 05:42 PM
1

I think ultimately, a secure relationship with a good woman is better, but it’s subject to anxiety. Dudes are not secure people, if she’s got experience you’re constantly worried you’re being compared. Every time she makes a change that improves her appearance it’s like “oh dear is this the change that makes her too good for me?” A new 20 year old every night avoids that issue entirely, so I can see the appeal. I mean, that and the benefit of variety.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 05:06 PM
17

I mean, I can’t really argue on a personal level; I’ve seen a lot of rejection in my life and ended up fairly conservative, but I have a hard time believing that an uptick in success with women now would change that. Also, for every right-wing incel I’ve seen I can also think of several loser men who go from there to full male feminist. I have to wonder, though, whether those guy’s support for casual sex and socialism is something they think will benefit them getting laid. Like I can see the log…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 03:36 PM
3

I get the sense that a version of this holds for men; yeah, there’s a lot of things that lot of guys want in a woman that opponents of these ideas would call ‘controlling women’; low n count, ideas about what’s proper that align with his. Accusations abound of expecting a ‘submissive’ woman but in fact assertive women are far sexier; it’s just less realistic to find someone who assertively wants these things for herself than someone who has these traits just because it improves her odds of being…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 11:42 AM
3

Physical: an ideal body type is basically one with a relatively low waist-to-hip ratio and a moderate body fat percentage. I’ve read that it’s so unanimous amongst men’s that body type has been effectively solved. On the other hand, men’s tastes in faces tend to differ. Ask me what kind of faces are 10/10 I’d maybe cite this actress and this actress but people I know have said both are only 6/10. I guess if I’m nit-picking, there’s something sexy about having a vocal range, too. I’m using that t…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 03:08 AM
1

7 boyfriends sounds to me like she changes them out way too easily. 7 hookups, though; like if she’s slept around at all I’m not interested, but if you’re sleeping around and have only done so 7 times, that’s not a lot of sex at all. Of course the reality is these numbers are averages and a woman with exactly seven could’ve picked up 5 during like a 2 month hoe phase in between two relationships that lasted years, or something
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 01:47 AM
1

The idea of double standards being bad in general is bullshit. Like, I’m a dude with a relatively effeminate body type and I’d love to sleep with a woman with a similar hip-to-waist ratio to mine, but those women tend to prefer you be triangle-shaped. Is that an injustice too?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/22 08:16 PM
4

Men on the other hand will often increase their standards in terms of what they deem psychically attractive enough for a relationship. On the one hand, I’d argue that men in fact compromise on looks for good other traits that make for relationship material. On the other I’ve seen men over-compromise and learn the hard way that your dick doesn’t care if you’re in love if you’re not attracted to her and you’re breaking her heart by trying. combine that with the fact that my age cohort is full of h…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/22 03:01 PM
1

Women look at late hoe phase men (again majority) as wanting “revenge” and making other women pay for the hurt and lack of sexual attention women showed him in the past. I’d argue this with it being necessary for these men to find out what they like and dislike, while “finding themselves”. I think moreso the reasons are thus; -if a man has achieved a workable RMV too late, his relationship prospects, at least those his own age, have decayed in value. OLD is full of single moms and pronouns in th…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/22 02:00 PM
4

Maybe it’s something wrong with me, but every time I’ve seen rankings like this I’ve thought the 9’s and 10’s through to the 7’s and even some 6’s should be in the exact reverse order. Am I weird for liking ‘pretty but plain’? Everything extra these 8s and 9s have that the 7s don’t comes off to me as a minor blemish
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 01:30 PM
2

Sex that isn’t at all transactional basically boils down to, the benefit he gets is sex with her and the benefit she gets is sex with him. No bribes, no exchange, whatever. Thing is, a woman’s interest in sex is simply a more scarce resource than a man’s. A “nice guy”, as most of us here picture him, believes that he can make up the value of having sex with him by simping for a woman. At least if a man expects to get more sex if he works out he’s directly trying to improve the attractiveness of …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 12:13 PM
1

If women do become desensitized to oxytocin, the most desensitized women are the ones who have spent the most time in committed relationships. That’s my expectation as well, although if she’s had a lot of hookups then you also don’t want a hoe
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 06:46 PM
4

women talk shamelessly enough about sex in mixed company, I can only imagine how shameless they must be in private with eachother. men, on the other hand, not so much, it’s usually surface level stuff when it comes up
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/22 03:07 AM
10

Fear of Emotions The kicker is that men’s emotions natural don’t fluctuate all that much; you could be upset about something and told by women that you’re ‘afraid to express your feelings’ because the way you show it is too mild, but god forbid something stress you to the point of tears, because then you lose her respect and attraction. never mind the fact that she thought it was toxic masculinity stopping you from bawling over menial nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/22 02:48 AM
5

Commonly, you’ll just be looking at a guy trying to pursue a girl who isn’t attracted to him and thinking that a relationship can be built from the ground up as the theoretical end point of a friendship becoming closer and closer. The thing is, if a woman wanted to escalate her friendship with a man to a relationship, she’d have decent odds; she’s probably attractive enough for his standards, assuming she’s average or above, and the pre-established trust and companionship would make her a better…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/22 09:38 PM
0

1) depends on past experience, really. 2) Long before it’s true, if you wanna keep seeing her. 3) A few months 4) Could take a while 5) Yeah
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 02:41 PM
1

overturning roe v wade gets rid of any responsibility a man has in these situations If the woman is able to abort and chooses to the man has just skirted responsibility. If she can’t then she’ll either force him to take responsibility or choose not to. He’s more likely to have to take responsibility now compared to before if he lives somewhere with restrictions. or just not having sex (the way they tell women to not have it after roe v wade) it was pro-abortion women saying en mass that they’d s…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 10:58 PM
4

As someone who spent his best years working toward building something with someone who just decided to fuck off one day, I’d rather now scramble to make up for the casual sex I missed out on by doing something so insanely retarded
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 06:47 PM
2

They will end up with something they wouldn't settle for in the beginning and they'll be happy about it. I think it’s more likely in todays state of the world that they just don’t settle at all; if the women that want you aren’t women you’d want to have sex with chances are that rather than take on the responsibility of maintaining a relationship with one you’d just give up and accept that you’re not gonna be getting laid. At least if a miracle happens and a desirable woman does end up wanting t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/22 07:44 PM
1

would she be less desirable for men than ver cisgender peers because guys would know that she was assigned maleat birth but has a female gender identity? I mean, what’s a ‘female gender identity’, anyway? That property of anyone who requests “please regard me as a woman”? ‘Cause like, fair enough, but I don’t wanna fuck every woman, so you get no guarantees from that alone. Moreover transgender women are esterile like women with Complete Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome. So if a man wants to have…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 01:03 AM
12

sex strike 🙄Oh no, women who would’ve never been interested in me to begin with are going to stop risking STDs to pleasure random strangers who don’t care if they even enjoy themselves while doing so. what an unfortunate turn of events
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 01:59 AM
2

I do think it’s different, and I’ve got no interest in being on the giving or receiving end of anal. It’s supposedly painful for the receiving party, and somewhat degrading as well. I suppose you could say the same of vaginal penetration, but I’ve only seen a small minority of women act as though that’s degrading, so I’m inclined to believe it’s not.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 03:38 PM
16

From my experience? Whether it’s a relationship or something casual she’s after, a woman who’s even passingly attracted to a man will push him for sex before even he’s ready. If the guy is the more eager of the two, she’s just not into him.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/22 11:16 PM
1

Well with stuff mostly gone back to normal now I’m sure any babies born today won’t be affected
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/22 05:47 PM
2

To logic it out, the alternative to cheating is leaving someone; if you’re choosing to cheat over walking away from a relationship, unless you’re branch-swinging you’re probably not interested in a relationship with the other partner. So, if it’s true that women are generally benefitting from relationships in a number of ways and men in a relationship sacrifice a fair deal because it’s consistent sex, then women would be expected to be the ones trying to hold onto their relationship with a man e…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/22 02:21 PM
5

Hard to be with someone for the size of his cock if you’re not attracted to him enough to let him show it to you. A bank account, on the other hand…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/22 12:48 PM
1

If this means getting the attention that the average woman gets in exchange for incurring the risk that applies to the average woman, I think it’s a good amount of benefit and I’m still pretty safe, where I am. The risk, of course, is going to vary depending where you live. If I took that deal in a big city I’d immediately move
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 02:29 PM
0

Accessible Healthcare: Guys who get a lot of pussy want to know they’re taken care of in the event of an STD. Minimum wage: Alpha fucks who get laid a lot are spending their time with that and not with getting the credentials for beta bucks jobs, so the value of the minimum wage matters to their future prospects. Alternatively, it’s that women generally support policies that bend toward equality of outcome, and guys who get laid a lot spend a lot of time interacting and being influenced by women…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 02:20 PM
2

I’m tempted to say no, because if I take a look at what’s considered top beauty these days, I don’t really agree with most of it. I do like some of today’s highly valued features, but I know for a fact that my vote for the best-looking celebrities is in the minority. I’m therefore not going to argue that the beauty standards of the society are set that way because they’re just objectively the most attractive features; instead I’ll propose that the main people publishing fashion magazines and the…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 08:24 PM
4

Overall, among almost all non white people, whiteness is the standard of beauty irrespective of other features. That’s why globally skin bleaching products are among the top three beauty products. Women are told not to play outside so they won’t get dark. I saw a lot of this in Asia; skin-whitening gels, double-eyelid surgeries… almost everyone I’ve heard comment on it insisted that those features have defined what’s considered beautiful in China since ancient times, and I can confirm that menti…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 08:09 PM
6

Finally, it’s hypothesized that the shape of the penis itself evolved in order to displace other men’s semen. The rebuttal to this that I remember hearing is that you would have to have sex so soon after the other male ejaculated to successfully displace the sperm that you’d need to be participating in a gangbang. If your wife cheats and comes home to you later that night, it’s too late.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 07:39 PM
1

I mean, I want my own kids so that scenario is off the table unless we’re having them some other way, or just the once in order to reproduce. I’m fairly low libido so if it weren’t for that… well I’d still want to at least occasionally. An arrangement where I could just go elsewhere for all that wouldn’t work because It’d be harder to come by if I’m technically taken already. Maybe if the details were worked out in advance.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 07:44 PM
12

I’ve seen a few commentaries on this kind of thing; a phenomenon of men agreeing to a “polyamory” arrangement (because it’s always the woman asking for it). Most of the time it’s just him getting the short end of the stick and the woman putting all her attention into someone else while sapping his resources, but assuming he does pick up another GF he’s got two things coming to him; number one the girlfriend gets jealous because only she was supposed to have a side piece, second the other girl he…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/22 10:31 PM
4

Sociologists generally regard gender as a social construct, with that in mind, wouldn't it make gender subjective? As in, one culture would consider you a certain gender, and another would consider you as a completely different one. That’s something I’ve thought about, and it does become a problem because if genders are societally defined then that makes it legitimate to call an effeminate male a ‘she’, even if he’s perfectly happy referring to himself as male. The gender activist crowd got arou…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/22 11:21 AM
1

Honestly, though it’s counterintuitive, a man with a lower libido may be in a more favourable position being good at getting casual sex. You’ll only get it every so often, because it’s difficult, but with a low libido that’s all you want anyway. Your steady girlfriend, on the other hand, will worry you’re not attracted to her if you’re not into it often. High libido, on the other hand; who’s saying more want for sex makes standards higher? You’d take what you can get, I’d imagine. that type of p…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 03:38 PM
5

We’re clearly on the Ancient Greek ‘a mother is no parent’ model here
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 03:04 PM
8

It’s hookup culture. Women are having more casual sex. Men are seeing this and wanting in on the fun, but average guys maybe only succeed in this once or twice, ever. Average guy is sweet, though, and one of those successes asks to be his gf. Average Joe either thinks, he’s not ready for that ‘cause he hasn’t had his fun yet, or doesn’t like her promiscuous history. He says no, and has another extended dry spell because relationship sex isn’t happening, but at least the second and final time he’…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/22 08:19 PM
1

Well, having been burned by one marriage, it was between catching up on the casual sex I missed by marrying too young or making another attempt to start a family. Both, in that order was always an option. Most men though, I agree, pick an LTR over casual sex because the sex is more consistent, which is something about which I've had an epiphany; If you're a man with a low libido, you may find it preferable to learn to pick up women for casual sex. You'd think that casual sex would be ideal for s…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/22 08:57 PM
1

Nah, I agree with the observation here; women’s threshold for how long they’ll wait for sex is shorter, in all contexts, than mens. I’ll break that down into different contexts and what I’ve noticed. First is LTR. Common scenario the man and the woman meet and interact, have some dates, etc. The man risks being turned down for not initiating something quickly enough, while the man can tolerate waiting longer than that as long as things are going well. (I know the common topic here is when she ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/22 04:21 PM
1

Calling it entitlement makes it sound like he’s demanding sex, when in fact what most of these men are doing is turning down one offer to wait for a better one. Not the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/22 12:11 PM
1

If you’re hooking up casually with random guys, That tells a man that sex is just sex to you, not something special to save for someone important. You’ve got your guys out there who will lose interest on that basis alone, but we’re here to discuss the ones who turn you down for making them wait. What it tells them is that, although you don’t particularly value sex at all, it’s nothing special, you still choose to withhold it until he gives you what you want; You don’t want to have sex with him f…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/22 11:18 PM
1

My experience with religious and non-religious women alike who want a virgin guy is that they’ll take a guy who wishes he was a virgin because they’re looking for a particular attitude toward sex. Men with the same expectation aren’t so lenient because they’re concerned mainly with the experience itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/22 10:47 PM
2

Your life is very limited and under scrutiny, especially as they start to unconciously know you don't enjoy being with them anymore. Things that Experience tells me must happen regularly; a man falls in love with a woman for her personality and she pushes him away once she suspects that he’s mostly having sex to make her happy, and not because he’s physically attracted to her. What recourse does one even have there, marry an insufferable whore just for her body? Who the hell gets punished for be…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/22 08:00 PM
1

What are we defining as "maturing", exactly? let's be socially conservative and say that mature means that you recognize the value of stability and the emptiness of whoring around and aren't tempted to discard the former in favor of the later. Let's also assume that maturity is a one-way street and that once you've learned that lesson, it's learned. One possible outcome of a hoe phase is that you get burned by the emptiness of it and learn that stability is better, sure, but just as often feedin…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/22 06:21 PM
1

I have to wonder if there are any facial features that are widely considered attractive today, simply because in the distant past there was, for instance, a man who produced an insane number of heirs with all kinds of women, who also happened to have a random fetish that ended up getting passed down.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 09:03 PM
17

Yeah, until you get to that age and your stable guy has since been scooped up in his early 20’s, divorced, and is now going around catching up on all the fun he missed, largely by feigning interest in a long term relationship. And women fall for it because ‘She may have left him, but the fact that he married early means he was commitment-minded, and should still be because men never change.’
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/22 05:54 PM
12

Call me whatever names you like for being in the ‘happy wife, happy life’ camp, but “ many woman are left with men that aren’t that sexually appealing” sounds like those men will suffer all kinds of indignities in said LTR. At least if you’re trying and failing to get casual sex, you can rest easy in the knowledge that if you eventually manage to get an ONS it’s a girl with niche enough tastes to find you attractive and treat you accordingly.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 03:24 PM
1

You can experience spontaneous sexual desire and have the self-control not to act on it (if that’s where your morals are) Or, like many men, you can experience spontaneous sexual desire and come up short looking for a partner to do anything about it with. You can also experience responsive desire and be really slutty because the opportunities keep presenting themselves and you keep acting on them. So I think if you’re being selective about a ‘slut’ vs a ‘good girl’ you’ll want to consider both m…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/22 03:53 PM
7

“you’re supposed to be a good parent, what do you want a cookie?” This is a big one; it’s easy enough to say that something is the bare minimum and not deserving of reward, but when outright bad behaviour that goes against that is being rewarded you might want to incentivize not doing that.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/22 03:16 PM
3

I think for most men there’s a few different factors at play. Sex with a lot of casual partners (or any, depending on how strict you are) before being ready to settle down will make the guy you choose feel insulted if you’re not as quick to initiate sex and that makes him feel like you’re not attracted to him enough to drop the inhibitions. Also, if he’s less experienced, which he probably will be if he’s the type that women want for a relationship instead of casual sex it could be a matter of ‘…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/22 03:03 PM
2

Women who have casual sex with men tend to do so only with men who have shallow, quickly pleasing characteristics like physical attractiveness. If a man has deeper potential, she's going to take things slower and be more invested in the relationship. In a society where women have both education about birth control and access to birth control, she's only going to reproduce with men who have deeper qualities. Our instincts are based on a time when anyone and everyone having an ONS was inviting the…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/22 01:06 PM
0

Married women are more conservative than single men. ‘Cause nobody wants to marry a liberal woman
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 04:15 PM
1

Men definitely do treat women sometimes like objects. When guys look to hook up they treated women as interchangable with one another. They are perceived mostly as a body or vessel upon which they want to have sex. This form of objectification, however, is still compatible with the Kantian 'mere means principal'; if a woman agrees to hooking up casually with a man because they both find eachother attractive, they can objectify eachother all they want while still respecting eachother's agency.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/22 09:16 PM
2

No dude ever wants to be the one stuck providing for a woman who's taking sex elsewhere. Every Beta out there who was told "I like you, be my boyfriend?" would unanimously respond "I don't need a girlfriend right now, but casual sex would be fine".
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 02:58 PM
1

women’s fertility would not remain the same either Evolution in that case would still favour a man not pumping effort into impregnating a woman who's past her fertility window when he could have more success with someone younger. If the men can't tell whether the women are still able to bear children, they might become more promiscuous to avoid being locked into a steady partnership with someone who won't produce children.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/22 02:42 PM
3

Population in parts of the world with historically high infant mortality is going down to accommodate better survival. We’ve already experienced that in the west and now we’re full of people who were an only child who don’t want kids because that would mean directing care and attention away from themselves. It’s a lot like a child learning that mom is pregnant and worrying that he won’t be the family baby anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 09:24 PM
1

folks This is how you know someone is spouting bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 08:39 PM
2

I'm unwilling to invest any resources into raising a child, if those resources could be better spent on children who carry my genetic code. Simple as. There might be other reasons depending on what the individual single mother's circumstances say about her as a person, but that's the constant across all of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 01:20 PM
2

As in, if a man was vocal about being depressed and suicidal and literally said "I'm going to kill myself if somebody doesn't show me affection", a woman STILL has no moral obligation to give that to him. If he’s gonna do that, that’s on him. It’s a manipulative thing to threaten and he’s likely mentally unwell. I came in here expecting a hypothetical like ‘he’s got some rare disease that for some reason can be cured by her magic vagina’ Still not morally obligated, but if she decided to do it I…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 11:30 PM
2

Pronouns in the bio “BLM” “If you can’t handle me at my worst…” Single mother “Here for a good time not a long time” “Done playing games”
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 12:09 AM
12

IDK, wanting me as a long-term partner after she’s already had her fun banging around seems pretty disrespectful to me. If she respects me and respects the sanctity of marriage and saves herself for it then option 1, if not then neither because getting fucked by a woman who just wantonly sleeps with men she doesn’t respect on the first date sounds like a good way to contract an STD
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/22 05:15 PM
1

40 percent of relationships are currently being started via dating apps so the whole pump and dump is bs. From my experience the women on dating apps are out for relationships, the men to pump and dump; the relationships are forming when and if the women are quality enough to make the case for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/21 04:07 PM
1

Men can’t be sure, without the intervention of some very modern science, that their woman hasn’t secretly gone off and gotten pregnant by some other guy, and if you invest in the offspring of that cheating thinking it’s yours, your bloodline won’t continue. So, understandably, we evolved a lot of paranoia about having this happen, which inclines us to use signals that this might be happening as a cue to divorce and go find a more faithful woman to get pregnant with our actual baby. Rare though c…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/21 02:19 AM
0

That would be in line with the study’s conclusions about gay men being much less fluid than lesbian women; recall that straight women are attracted to the features I listed as well, so they’re of course not inherent turn-offs. My point, I think, was supposed to be that male features, if you’re not attracted to them, illicit disgust while female features, if you’re not, are at most boring. There’s probably more to it than that but I think there’s plenty of discussion to be had about how much disg…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/21 03:59 PM
15

I was legitimately theses girls exclusive boyfriend(longest one lasted 8 months) and none of them could “bring themselves” to have sex with me. This is the sting felt by any man who’s waiting for marriage and finds himself a woman who can respect that; a virgin even. If she’s a virgin you might think it’s because she has self-control but that’s a myth; she’s never been inspired to fuck a guy out of wedlock before, sure, but if you don’t either don’t think that’s because of your lack of trying. T…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/21 05:08 PM
2

Well as far as straight men not wanting to snack up with other guys goes, I can give you a list, starting with the biggest reason, why I’m turned off by other guys: They smell musky They’re hairy When they cum they make a mess everywhere Unattractive face Being in good shape makes their muscles hard which I can’t imagine is comfortable to cuddle into I’d imagine that it’s easier for a straight woman to enjoy some form of sexual activity with another woman because these issues don’t exist; women …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/21 05:33 AM
1

I’ll answer with simpleton man logic, but clearly if these women are being mislead by these gestures it’s sure as hell not how women think; Sex is the height of intimacy, paying for dinner for someone isn’t. If you can have casual sex, and it’s ‘just sex’ then you can buy someone dinner casually and not have it mean anything; if you can readily afford it treating your platonic friends isn’t weird at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/21 10:23 PM
3

the ones I’ve seen? always the woman and she always forbids the men from seeing other women. I had a lesbian friend who joined a bisexual woman’s harem once and was subject to the same boundary.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/21 02:00 PM
1

Sex is absolutely love, until it’s not. There’s not really anything more intimate that you can employ, so at any N-count above 1, I don’t think there’s any good basis on which to say you’re in love; diminishing returns and your partner not having a monopoly on the experience forces you into a corner where either intimacy together doesn’t count toward love, and therefore nothing is intimate enough to count, or it counts, but only as much as the first did at best, and you already fell out of love …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/21 06:14 PM
4

A relevant analogy can be drawn with different ice cream flavors. If you have only been exposed to one flavor, that flavor will satisfy you whenever you have a craving for ice cream. If you've been exposed to multiple flavors (vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, etc.), you will develop a diversity of cravings - one flavor is unlikely to perpetually satisfy your desire. It's not to say that one flavor tastes better - it’s about the cravings for variety that will arise from being exposed to other flav…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/21 02:12 AM
1

Let's say your partner gave oral sex to his/her ex. But now he/she refuse to do so with you because he/she is not into it anymore. Would that be a Dealbreaker ? Just from my experience, most women who’ve told their new prospective boyfriend they “tried oral and didn’t like it” ended up really enthusiastically asking him to try it as soon as she decided she liked him enough Edit: the oral sex is only an example. You can replace it with anal sex Anal seems like a better example because it’s a lite…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/21 07:32 PM
6

I read it as ‘the reason high n-count women are avoided for relationships’ implying, this holds true for men, but women aren’t avoiding them on this grounds, as often
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/21 02:43 AM
1

but overtime professor became skeptical and presented mate switching hypothesis: women looking to trade up (hypergamy), transition mates, or see if they are still desirable, so they can transition into mating pool easier, or a back up mate This reminds me of that common movie plot, where the husband will be cheating with some woman and she’ll be hurt emotionally by the realization that his cheating with her doesn’t mean he wants to leave the wife for her. I wonder how often such a scenario happe…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/21 05:55 PM
3

I hardly even see the point in making a checklist; there’s a few key things you’re going to want information about, personality, attitudes toward sex, appearance; get that info and see whether having it turns you off completely or makes you feel good about them. Easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/21 05:57 PM
4

On the timescales we’d be working with looking at history as a whole, there was never a solid 10,000 year period in which gender relations were consistently conservative and no liberalization could ever be undone. You give me any period in Chinese history, for instance that had women being mostly kept inside I guarantee you it came after General Fu Hao served as the top commanding officer in her husband’s army.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/21 05:37 PM
5

Is that how it was for the majority of women for the majority of history? Most of history was written by the literate, about the literate, and before technology starts to pick up in the Industrial Age that’s basically synonymous with ‘wealthy’. The speculation is that the way marriages were handled by the poor to middle class back then was worlds apart from the ‘buy a bride off her father’ shenanigans the aristocrats were getting up to, but anyone who tells you they’ve got sources to prove one w…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/21 05:23 PM
3

lol this article makes it look like those men have good traits because they're less attractive than their wives. I suspect it's more that women are happier when they're married to someone who they picked for a good reason, and not a shallow one.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/21 05:32 PM
3

I think you’re on the ball with women’s interests playing a role, but whether or not that was moderated by women themselves or by men is hard to pinpoint, because history tends to tug back and forth with regard to gender relations, and women’s agency. having an extra pair of hands to help raise the kids is in the interests of any woman, sure, but it’s also in the interests of the kids themselves, and the father of those kids has just as much reason to want to invest in them as their mother does,…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/21 05:55 AM
1

Or that women who work a lot tend to be more stressed out and not want to have sex, which causes the man to look elsewhere. I mean this would’ve been my guess
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/21 08:12 PM
1

I don’t think experience really proves useful at all for relationships, casual sex perhaps it does. If you want to look for casual sex, more experience will teach you your target audience and what generally works to seduce them. Men I know with varying degrees of relationship experience just tend to all have the same experience regarding their current girlfriend, which is ‘I don’t know what the fuck I did to make her like me.”
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/21 07:15 PM
2

I only ever hear ‘intimidated’ to mean ‘she wasn’t up to his standards and he turned her down’ Like ‘oh he’s intimidated by sexually liberated women’ or something. I never hear ‘she’s too good-looking and the dude was intimidated to approach her’ which is something that actually happens. It’s the same line of thinking as when a woman gets turned down and she says ‘his standards are too high, he’s not that desirable’, to which my response is ‘if you don’t think he’s desirable then why were you ho…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/21 04:22 PM
1

As a man I think I’d be more willing to indulge the sexual fantasies of a woman the more attracted to her I was; but that’s not purely a matter of ‘physically’, the more I like her overall the more I’d want to do with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/21 04:54 AM
1

This has been my experience to the point that even bothering to approach a woman who’s not already actively aggressing on me feels like unethically pressuring her.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/21 09:04 PM
2

Accurate. Although I’ve seen ‘maybes’ graduate to ‘fuck yes’ at the drop of a hat; like the push they needed was so small as to be virtually nonexistent.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/21 06:54 PM
8

I’ve come to the conclusion that ‘impressing’ a woman or ‘earning’ her sexual interest just doesn’t exist; if she’s interested in you she’ll just go from 0-60 completely unprovoked leaving you to wonder what the hell you did to make that happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/21 06:21 PM
1

Losing half your shit to a woman’s “mature response” to seeing you fall victim to the inevitable loss of attractiveness that come with aging isn’t a healthy path to a good life or relationship for a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 08:46 PM
4

I mean at the same time having kids is self-interested in the sense that you’re fulfilling the biological imperative of passing your genes down, evolution and by extension your basic instincts treat that as a victory. Case in point people’s jealousy over someone they hate having a baby when they don’t. That’s not to say that abortion as birth control isn’t selfish in its’ own right; we could argue whether a fetus is a human life that it would be unethical to kill, but whichever side you’re on yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 07:53 PM
7

modern men who are inundated daily with photoshopped images and edited videos exaggerating slimness and WHR to unnatural levels. Those photos tend to show up mostly in magazines aimed at women, who see them and feel bad about themselves. Men aren’t paying a tonne of attention to them. We see real women with real proportions daily, and the thin ones among those are the attractive ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 07:36 PM
3

Well it’s mostly the fact that she’d get better at falling out of love. I mean, I was a virgin when I first married; in the misery leading up to that divorce “working things out” was my only option, now for the sake of an N count of just one, assuming another woman comes along and convinces me to start a relationship, it’s not even an option. I refuse to fight to keep another relationship healthy, especially when I wouldn’t be losing out on a woman with the sentimental value of being my one and …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 05:49 PM
4

More like how Gender Studies is a thing; an entire field dedicated to repeating over and over again that reputable academic studies have been ‘debunked’ not because peer review failed to replicate their findings but rather because they go against the narrative we’re trying to construct here. Oh, and like, food companies paying off nutritionists to promote their products, and junk.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 05:33 PM
2

I mean, if the premise is that you shouldn’t worry about meaningless ONS because she’ll enjoy being with you more than them, I guess, but you’d still be compared to previous “love and connection” sex if she’s ever had a serious boyfriend before, and it’s not like women are transitioning straight from ‘slutting around’ to marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 05:28 PM
2

Well given the tone of the article like it’s trying to support some ‘female liberation’ shit and going on about ‘society’, I’m reminded as I read it of the fact that anyone trying to push an agenda is perfectly capable of manipulating data. At that point I’d sooner just figure out by asking what the situation is for the one woman, if that, whose level of sensitivity would even matter to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 05:23 PM
2

Men are wary about marriage regardless. When you take the possibility of being special to her as her only partner off the table that’s an added risk on top of everything that keeps married men up at night, scared.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 05:17 PM
3

Just speaking from experience it’s a reasonable assumption considering that men do get desensitized to sexual stimulation over time. Why wouldn’t I assume that women work the same way I do?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 05:04 PM
1

Why did i need to be "you must be weak and submissive so that i am incentived to protect you"? Except feminine stature probably had nothing to do with incentivizing males to protect them. Once you’ve become the dominant species who can afford to live far from threats like lions and bears neither the men or the women need to really be muscle-hunks anyway. Not every animal needs to be, even; you get species of monogamous monkey where the male and the female are equally small and cute and can just …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 03:55 PM
1

I mean, you’re basing this argument on the assumption that women are attracting men to look after them by being as helpless as possible, and defining that as ‘feminine’. It’s not. In a species like us where the male and the female both contribute to the well-being of children, we’re able to divvy up the tasks and become specialized in our roles. What passed for a feminine woman back thousands of years ago was one with at least some important skills she could bring to the table; gathering food, f…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 08:10 AM
1

…what? The whole idea of the dual mating strategy theory is that women want Chad for his good genes and the beta for resources. You don’t advance that strat by aborting Chad’s baby. You could maybe make the argument that these women want to abort the beta’s baby to replace with Chad’s, and that’s happened before from some particularly malicious women, but aborting to hide sex with Chad so the beta is still willing to impregnate you makes no sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/21 07:11 AM
2

I know mid-20s women dating early 30s men; the women tend to be, like 23-24 with the maturity of a 28 year old, and the men 31-32 with also the maturity of a 28 year old. That’s not a huge leap forward or backward for either of them, neither of those 4 year differences makes any *real difference. It’s not like the jump between 20 and 24, or the jump between 30 and 34. An age gap that size works when it’s perfectly timed.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/21 09:24 PM
1

looks; 8 success; 2 status; 1 social skills; 4
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/21 06:07 AM
3

What's your view in virginity in a spouse and why? Assuming I do marry? absolute requirement. Do you hold yourself to the same standard, e.g., you're not a virgin and would not hold it against your spouse for not being a virgin since you slept around? I saved myself for marriage, before ending up divorced. Not being a virgin has me pretty much ruined for marriage, because I’m a romance hedonist and could never appreciate a woman enough to commit to her for a lifetime unless she can give me the f…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/21 12:17 AM
1

Gee I hope not. By which I mean, there's a particular way that I'd absolutely love to feel for a woman, and being divorced already I feel that's been spoiled. If a woman does manage to illicit that from me, though, I'll contend that my ex-wife never counted. How can it have been love if it got surpassed later down the line, after all?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/21 02:09 AM
5

Better to grind for new pussy than grind than grind to stop existing pussy from running off with half your shit. Casual sex next to marriage is like bowling night with the boys next to the plot of “Squid Game”.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/21 01:39 AM
4

I'm sure there misinterpreting this as suggesting that "women like unavailable men", and of course some of them do, but that's not even the strat here. The strat is to come off as (or in my case, be) a good "safe" option, but with a sad backstory that makes her think she think she can manipulate you if the sex is good enough, cause pussy redeems the lost or something idk. Once she's got in her mind that sex is the way to manipulate you, you can even say "no", sex will still happen if she's got a…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/21 01:08 AM
39

What is your advice to men on how to get the most sex? Find a woman who’s “done with the games and ready to settle down”, maybe she sees you as the beta option, don’t worry about this for now, just follow the plan. Tell her a relationship sounds like it would be nice, but your last relationship left you feeling numb to romance so you don’t know if you can be of any help. Congrats, you’ve unlocked the mode where her beta-securing strategy shifts from “hold off on sex so he doesn’t think you’re ea…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/21 01:47 PM
1

before any pair-bond that's destined to be disrupted can form, you get reloaded from a previous save.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/21 06:30 AM
1

In my experience, a lot of women try to get something out of a man (that’s commitment, more often than not) by sleeping with him to get him emotional. it works, unsurprisingly, on virgins, but any guy who’s got any experience is desensitized to those ‘tingles’ and can’t be convinced. Gotta get in early.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/21 10:58 PM
12

He’s identified a problem; men doing the bare minimum to support themselves and staying occupied with video games and porn. It’s because the culture has shifted such that securing an LTR is a difficult task with stiffer than ever competition, but the rewards have dwindled, divorce is more likely than ever, you can’t count on companionship. Men with the means to do so would rather bang women short term and avoid putting in effort beyond that since the returns on successfully securing an LTR are b…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/21 08:15 PM
2

Likely not all men are; I mean I tend to be OK with doing that stuff because I meet so many women who enjoy it, and I can empathize with them enjoying it only because I'm such a fan of having that stuff done to me. Beyond that I'm fairly neutral to being on the 'dishing it out' end, and a lot of the men I've heard comment on the topic seem to be the same way.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/21 04:31 AM
1

better than being treated less well.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/21 04:25 PM
1

I’ll be more specific in my answer; You know the visceral disgust that men have about dating a woman with much of a sexual past? If it was all other women it’s not so disgusting. Maybe it’s a red flag, but it wouldn’t register as one.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/21 04:19 PM
1

Neither seems very good, but if woman A is treating me better than woman B but worse than she treated people before me, while woman B is treating me better than anyone else but worse than woman A, I’ve got to go with woman B.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/21 04:03 PM
2

The vast vast majority of people feel in their mind as the same gender as they are in the rest of their body. As they should. How would you even quantify that? I’m a guy, I have no point of reference for what most people with a vagina “feel like in there mind”. If my mode of thinking corresponded more closely to that of a woman, making me ‘transgender’, how would I even know?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/21 03:36 AM
1

I’ll have to make up an example to get around the vagueness here, but as far as sex goes, let’s compare two women real quick; Let’s take one, she had a guy, the love of her fucking life who she always wanted to take to bed, couldn’t contain herself at all. He’s out of the picture now and she’s not happy about it, I don’t really appeal to her physically, but she wants me because for some reason I’ve got the resources to at least take care of her and it’s not like she’ll ever be as madly in love a…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/21 07:36 PM
0

51% of men are single and 32% of women are (age 18-29) Sounds like almost half of boyfriends haven’t been notified of their condition.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/21 03:44 PM
21

women with low numbers tend to mention those low numbers before you’ve so much as asked. it’s the ones with unacceptably high numbers that refuse to tell you.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/21 01:20 PM
1

On the other hand, the argument can be made that the existence of the sex bot is like the existence of rape porn i.e. it may amplify the man's desires for aggressive sex, which increases the risk that women are harmed. “Amplify desires” in this context is basically equivalent to “cause addiction”. In such a case, the content that caused the addiction in the first place will always be easier to access than real women, and it’ll be no more common than it’s ever been to take that addiction out on t…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/21 04:53 PM
1

Good parental leave and low birth rates both correlate with western countries. The west is seeing high rates of child-free women because of fears of overpopulation, Peter Pan syndrome, and white guilt.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/21 11:18 AM
1

women to whom ONS didn’t appeal when they were single probably won’t have them behind their partner’s back, either.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/21 02:35 AM
2

I remember reading that couples who are together for a long time with no children in the picture tend to split up; the ‘icks’ are a byproduct of instinctual ‘infertility panic’, their instincts tell them to go off and test whether finding someone different remedies the situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/21 05:30 PM
1

A fat girl can definitely still be really pretty, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a disadvantage
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/21 08:01 PM
1

I think it’s a better argument than saying “men get into all kinds of weird stuff they wouldn’t normally be interested in because all that porn conditions them to like it” People choose the kind of content they watch, and they’re not going to click on something that doesn’t appeal to them and get acclimatized to it. Though they might discover something they wouldn’t otherwise online, unless their immediate reaction is that they like it they won’t get enough exposure to be conditioned. I do have …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/21 07:53 PM
1

Isn’t this just ‘can’t make a hoe into a housewife’ for women? Just TRP ‘bang the sluts, sure, but settle down with a virgin, if anyone’ for women? The first guy isn’t having trouble getting marriage offers, Sheryl here is having to advise women against trying to marry them. ‘Only use them for fun’ is basically saying ‘no, you can’t change him, stop trying’. You’ve basically got two camps; you’ve got the women trying to lock down commitment from the bad boy, and are fucking him trying to achieve…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/21 03:56 AM
–

I'm thoroughly convinced that the size of a man's dick is purely the product of how much the girl he's with likes him. If she's into you she'll perceive it as bigger than it really is.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/21 11:09 PM
1

A single mother looking for a provider already has the kid in hand; she's delusional, but she's not committing paternity fraud. If there's some hormonal shift causing the woman to seek out a BB after she's pregnant with Chad's kid, she wouldn't be securing the BB first and then cheating on him, on the contrary she'd leave the Beta alone. That's what I observe, anyway. Single mothers go after Betas, Women who've never been pregnant don't give them the time of day until after the fact, obvious exc…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/21 11:03 PM
1

7 seems reasonable when you consider largely promiscuous women being offset by women trying their darndest to keep their number as low as humanly possible. The sluttiest woman I know, actually is slutty not because she takes home a different guy every other day, she more kinda passes herself back and forth between about 10 or 12. lots of FWBs but ONS is rare, hence more sex not necessarily translating to more partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/21 10:43 PM
2

How to get women: Be too busy for women. You can try to be productive all you want; once a woman has her sights set on you suddenly every night is movie night. Then where's your productivity?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/21 12:12 PM
2

In contrast, attractive participants had more insights into how attractive they actually are. If anything, they underestimated their attractiveness. So in other words, everybody thinks they're above-average attractiveness and actually attractive people would be right.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/21 01:03 PM
0

I'd go so far as to say it's more being short than autistic; I've got a friend with severe Asperger's who's the biggest man-whore I know (though struggles to turn those into LTR.) I'm mildly austistic and get offers. Then there's the short guy in our group. Autistic for sure, but us other two are 6'2", he's 5'3". No luck, at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/21 12:53 PM
19

Women reaching the tail end of their fertility window are, biologically speaking, desperate to get knocked up one last time and thus hornier than they were when they could afford to be picky.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/21 12:05 PM
2

In light of recent anecdotal evidence the best definition of FWB I can come up with is “when a woman fucked or tried to fuck you so early on that you were lead to believe she considered it casual sex” Putting out quick just isn’t wife material, so of course you don’t wanna LTR her if she did that for other guys. On the other hand when she does it for you and then sees you a second or third time to do it again, attempting to convince you to commit you think “oh, it’s a FWB arrangement”. And can y…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/21 09:41 PM
1

If I'm being cynical, I' say women would rather miss out on something good than to have it good, but not as good as she was hoping. What I wouldn't be accounting for is that being single opens up room to fantasize about what better deal may be coming. Most women won't get that, though. Blame it on high expectations. A man who's in a workable, but not ideal relationship usually won't be under the illusion that he can do better, unless a better deal is right in front of him making an offer, and a …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/21 10:40 PM
–

I mean, I’ve got to agree just by virtue of having once been a man on the receiving end of lacklustre sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/21 08:14 PM
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eh, a woman will write different fiction than a man; it'll still be fiction and it'll still be divorced from reality. The difference is in whose fantasies it portrays.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/21 01:44 AM
–

Is that really an argument? Don't get me wrong, yes that's what happens, but a show on Netflix can follow any plot that the writers want, doesn't prove anything. You want proof that having fun in your 20s and then settling down leaves her lukewarm about hubby and not as into him as the bad boy, real life has examples, you don't need to point to a TV script that can just as easily be divorced from reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/21 01:31 AM
2

More likely to have better oral sex skills (deep-throating etc) As far as I've heard from both men and women themselves, virgins will way more readily even do oral. More past experience equals more of a chance that she's run into a situation that's just completely turned her off the idea of giving head altogether. If she's never tried it that puts you in position, provided only you know what you're doing, to make it an appealing thing for her to do. 7) More likely to have a wider range of things…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/21 12:37 AM
–

Look, whether she's jumping straight into bed with you or with Chad, that's still a woman with poor impulse control. Drop. Now the problem is; When she makes you jump through hoops is that because she has principals, or because she's not into you enough to even have an impulse to be unable to control in the first place? give her hoops to jump through, if anything. I understand the safe bet is to assume that she doesn't have principals, but under that assumption you're not going to be LTRing any …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/21 12:10 AM
–

In understanding where they may be coming from, everything in a relationship can be considered a trade-off; what are men and women looking for and what are they withholding on their end if something that they're looking for is withheld. A sort of supply and demand dynamic enters into that; the "average market value" for which a man can get sex and companionship, but not a child, is generally from women who either don't demand to be provided for in return, i.e. an FWB situation, or women who will…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/21 11:50 PM
1

I mean, you’re absolutely right; why would a man (or anyone) just provide for the sake of providing? If I have money or resources, I worked hard for them, and I’m not going to give them away without getting something in exchange, nor do I think that any woman in her right mind would, either. If it’s a childfree guy then maybe not specifically an offspring, but even that guy isn’t going to get into a relationship and throw money into keeping a woman happy if he’s not getting anything out of it, t…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/21 04:21 PM
1

I think I'm kind of the reverse of that; wanting an LTR early on where by virtue of having no experience she's special to me, losing that and, out of fear that marriage comes with the risk of getting cheated on going "What I really want is an offspring, and my odds are, ironically, better if I knock up someone's cheating wife" That's the cynic and terrible person in me talking, though. In reality What I've done is gone from 'don't wanna fuck around' to precisely what you're describing
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/21 01:40 AM
0

With today's politics being so thoroughly steeped in sexuality? I think it's reasonable (though not necessarily fair) to operate on the assumption that political leaning is a predictor of attitudes toward relationships. Pretty much the main point of contention in politics right now is a culture war with sexuality at the heart of it; I'm generalizing, but the left is generally seen as the wing of nonmonogamy, having an extensive sexual past, hook-up culture, experimentation... The right is more t…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/21 01:29 AM
1

A theoretical couples' financial situation is only made better if the woman is bringing in an income, and outside of the most tradcon of tradcon men you won't see objections to this fact. Men who get left by their wives because her financial success shrinks or eliminates the gap between them making him less of a provider are left blindsided because he, projecting his male work ethic upon her, thinks "this is great! More money, better life!". Any unhappiness that womens' financial independence is…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/21 12:44 AM
-1

I'd like to know who's actually complaining. "Discrimination" in dating is really a concern of liberals moreso than conservatives, like saying "oh your dating preferences are transphobic" etc. The other thing to note, and I'm going anecdotal here, but women will say they don't want a conservative until one comes along who's good looking, and importantly, more good looking than all the effeminate liberals she could be choosing from; those values go out the window so fast. It's to the point that I…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/21 12:27 AM
8

Option 1; tonnes of attention and she’s waiting until marriage? Could she be any more perfect?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/21 03:31 PM
1

No, you’re pretty on-point. Most of us don’t. But the ones that do define a relationship in terms of sex because without that it’s just a really close friendship, and even with sex the line between a relationship and a fuckbuddy scenario is really just the rules and regulations; I guess emotions kinda factor but those can’t be controlled so it’s not useful to use them as a tool for defining things
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/21 08:07 PM
2

Friend, boyfriend, and fuckbuddy are all different situations. If you’ve got some way of differentiating ‘sex is special with this one and not with this one’ I’m not the one to ask about this because for me that line is “if she’s the only sex partner I’ve had she’s a girlfriend/wife, otherwise she’s a fuckbuddy” so take it up with one of the other men here as to why making them wait makes the difference to that distinction, all I’m doing is saying that this is the core of the issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/21 07:24 PM
3

Category C is definitely just par-for-the-course as far as casual sex-havers go. The problem I have with it pretty much starts and ends with the fact that it’s casual sex; being able to separate love from sex like that just makes love not worth it for me. I get the sense that these are, in fact, the types of women that we’re talking about when we complain, though. The difference is that there’s a social pressure on us to have to rationalize it in a way that doesn’t imply “look, a girl with any h…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/21 07:09 PM
2

God for bid that a woman who actually wants a relationship doesn't want to be used like some fleshlight. I keep hearing this line of reasoning, and combined with ‘I don’t care about guys I’m only using for sex’ it feels like women who have hookups, surprise surprise, don’t view sex as intimate and separate it from love. If that’s the case, why even try to date a guy and make him a sexual partner, especially one who you like more than the guys you’re letting ‘use you like some flashlight’? Why no…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/21 05:42 PM
2

I’m not saying that it’s special with the ONS, either. I’m saying that once sex is ‘just sex’, as far as any man is concerned all intimacy is ‘just intimacy’, and therefore not worth investing into a relationship for.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/21 05:35 PM
1

Love, or more accurately, romance, is basically the feeling that comes from uniquely special intimacy. Sex fits the bill, because there’s no higher form of intimacy, but once it’s no longer unique and your virginity’s gone, there’s no longer any form of intimacy strong enough to produce love; the intimacy I’d have to have with a woman to love her would need to be enough to invalidate my experience with anyone who’s not her. If sex can no longer do that, then obviously they’re separate, but so is…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/21 05:23 PM
4

I think men just don’t want a relationship, period, with women who’ve had ONS. It’s a promiscuous mating strategy and no man really wants to be bogged down pretending that sex with his partner is the peak of intimacy when the meaningfulness is worn out of it for her; if it’s good, pleasurable sex then maybe he’ll keep her around so he can continue to indulge, but won’t expect any feelings or attachment. He wants to be ONS guy because as LTR guy he’s never going to feel loved knowing that their i…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/21 04:32 PM
1

I suppose that being just another lay to her isn’t so bad if that’s all she is to you, but I find it hard enough to think of any girl in serious terms because of the standing inability to have her as my one and only, and if I can’t be that to her either it’s all the harder. Committing to one partner to have all my intimacy with is pretty contingent on that intimacy being special, which a past undermines. Just speaking from experience, dating a girl with a past doesn’t even actually feel like dat…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/21 05:01 PM
2

Is it really that hard to get a woman to orgasm? When I was an inexperienced college guy trying to preserve his virginity I managed just fine on fingering alone despite having no sweet clue what I was doing. The first I ever failed was owing to having married an apparent prude who wouldn't let me do that and demanded that foreplay be completely axed altogether. Maybe in a hook-up situation where I'm inherently objectifying her and I'm not gonna see her again I wouldn't actually care enough to ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/21 11:29 AM
2

This applies to men as well, but it's pertinent here: Your emotions are a team of incredibly short-term thinkers trying to solve long-term problems. The fact that they have your best interests at heart is only half the story, and they can't make game-plans on their own. That's it. That's my advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/21 12:34 AM
1

I can only agree here. I wouldn't call myself asexual but my relationship with sex is really love-hate and no relationship I could possibly be in could survive without some high-level meta conversation about that. "Playing the game" would ruin me, my situation is in need of mutual understanding with no room for assumptions.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/21 12:22 AM
86

Are they just at home watching Netflix while thirst guys flood bars and clubs at night? Of the friends I have who are single women, more than three quarters are doing exactly this most nights.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/21 12:30 AM
-2

If men only wanted a relationship then they wouldn’t have an issue with being friend zoned. But they want more than just “a relationship” they want to have sex. Oh look an aisle I’ve been on both sides of. I recently had to ghost a woman I really liked because she friendzoned me. My friends ask me “why is it when A friend zoned you you ghost her but B friendzoned you a while back and you’re still her friend” Well, I’d only really intended, if anything, to fuckzone B, so as the good friend she tu…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/21 10:17 PM
6

Annoying as it may be, that’s not the intention. For instance I was seeing this girl for a bit; met through OLD, things seemed to be going well, really well, but I apparently made her wait too long on a first kiss and she friend zoned me. She’s nice enough that I’d enjoy being a friend, but that means I now have to look elsewhere for a relationship, so I started chatting up a girl who, for now, I’m only mildly interested in. This girl who things seemed to be going well with would serve as a dist…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/21 09:05 PM
10

Know Thyself, know the meta. I'd be absolutely sure to communicate not just my goals, but my strategy openly and honestly. I'd discard any advice that says "listen to your heart", I'd question my heart and demand it explain itself. I'd make healthy use of the phrase "There's no way to sugar-coat this".
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/21 01:21 PM
1

I can’t imagine a huge number of lesbians particularly care whether they meet the definition of virgin, anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/21 01:56 PM
1

Now, bear in mind I’m not actually in an LTR, just stating my future plans assuming I ‘settle’
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/21 11:47 AM
2

Maybe this is just me, but I don't think I can say lack of affection, in the traditional sense, would come from me as a sign that I'd settled. It's simple why; all the LTR stuff, the cuddling, the kissing, etc. is still addictive no matter who I've settled for; just because I'm not much into her wouldn't mean that would stop, 'cause where else am I gonna get my fix?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/21 10:29 AM
0

A non virgin male is not “deflowered” or “used” yet a female is, the men complaining that non virgin women are somehow changed by men fucking them is interesting. It ties into the notion that male sexuality is destructive & defiling. In my defence, I feel very much “deflowered” as a man longing for a lost virginity. Women, however, largely don’t care and plenty have shown interest despite not having it and despite my moping about not having it. That’s where the double standard comes in; I keep b…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/21 08:18 AM
1

In the context of wanting a virgin for LTR? A virgin is anyone who hasn’t experienced a sexual act that makes me want to stop pursuing her.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/21 08:06 AM
12

Dating is similar to war: You get good at it by reading Sun Zi and you get ethical at it by reading the 1949 Geneva Conventions.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/21 05:45 PM
3

I mean yeah, a woman asking in good faith for an open relationship is a dealbreaker and most men wouldn’t want to deal with it. Can’t say I’ve got a lot of experience about how a woman would react to her man honestly banging other women, but anecdotally I can bring up times when the girlfriend of someone I knew would encourage him to fuck a specific other woman because she wanted to see it happen; I’ll never understand that situation, but it occurred.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/21 05:39 PM
1

I'm not satisfied risking it with someone whose got any history, really. No amount of intimacy would ever be enough in that case.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/21 12:38 AM
2

On this topic, I mean, I'll continue to rag on the 'strong, independent woman' as long as that continues to be associated with things like promiscuity and branch-swinging, but any time those traits correlate with virtue and faithfulness they're really attractive. It's like, good luck finding a woman who can get shit done but who will also cuddle you, play with your hair and doesn't believe in casual sex, but you're set if you do.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/21 11:20 AM
4

and 70% chance of an orgasm from relationship sex Roughly 30% of men in relationships aren't educated about how to induce Female orgasm. That's not a terrible percentage considering it takes a while and requires stimulation that isn't immediately obvious. Generally these numbers are reported as around 30% chance of orgasm for casual sex Roughly 30% of men, so like 45% of men who apparently know how to give a woman an orgasm, are putting in the effort for someone they'll never see again. Why's th…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/21 12:23 AM
3

Single mothers want all of a man's resources going to support HER kids, not a man's kids by another woman. Oh hey, that's why I don't want a single mother. I'm chastised for it, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/21 12:07 PM
1

I may be divorced and therefore necessarily N>/=2 if I ever get into a relationship, but I’d go so far as to pay if I could undo that and just be lifetime N=1 with someone. Not getting that really upsets me, even makes me kinda not want a relationship to begin with; unique connection or no connection; I’m well aware I’m like a spoiled child about this. Lifetime N=1 would be perfect, to the point that I envy people who have that when I can’t. I’m serious.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/21 02:35 AM
1

I generally want any and all kids I’m raising or helping to raise to be biologically mine, that’s just how men work. Would you apply the same judgment to single dads? All the single moms I know who found a workable relationship are with single dads. When you’re not filling the role of ‘father’ for free, and she’s actually trading you a mom for your own very biological kid that’s also not hers, you’ve now taken what’s detestable about dating a single mother and made it a fair transaction, so that…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/21 02:22 AM
1

If she’s making every guy wait for sex until she develops an emotional bond with him, then she’s much less likely to cheat or branch swing because it takes time and a lot of work to develop an emotional bond. Fair, but if the emotional bond she claims to have toward me is the same she’s had toward someone else then she loses if I can instead opt for someone whose one-and-only I could be. Non-virginity is never actually optimal.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/21 06:47 PM
1

‘Not being wanted’ is the exact problem men have with ‘hoes’, you generally want to marry someone who actually wants you. For a good majority of men it would take being her ‘special first and only’ to even be wanted; promiscuous women saying ‘He’s not worth being with anyway’ aren’t pulling a gotcha, they’re confirming precisely why the man would want to marry a virgin, if anyone, to begin with. Now if a woman were head-over-heels for a guy but he refused to believe she loved him because he coul…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/21 06:19 PM
1

For me, it’s the amount of intimacy inherent in sex; if she was that intimate with someone then I can’t be more intimate with her. I feel shitty myself, having been divorced for the same reason; another relationship just can’t be the most intimate one I’ve ever had if the ex-wife got to be who I saved it for and she doesn’t. A history of long, rather than short relationships doesn’t help either. I’ve had to turn one girl down because her longest relationship was 9 goddamn years. If I said yes it…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/21 03:52 PM
2

I was already suffering a lot of abuse from her, but having saved my virginity for marriage, and that being sacred to me, I just put up with it. Once she cheated I didn’t really have any excuse anymore. Most people who know her think she’s got some sort of mental illness that may have contributed, as well. I’m convinced I developed one myself putting up with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/21 09:43 PM
1

How important are sexual compatibility, and "good bedroom skills" relative to other qualities (looks, personality, family background, finances, future plans, etc) in a potential long term partner? “skills” I don’t particularly care. How important is regular sex? I’m a ‘none before marriage’ guy myself, but I’m also unfortunately a divorcee, and what I’ve learned is that if it’s infrequent, something is wrong. Very wrong. How important is being sexually open/adventurous? I can’t say I’d be picky,…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 08:24 PM
3

the bill requires that a person who is seeking to raise the defence of “reasonable belief in consent” must demonstrate what actions they took or what words they spoke to ensure they had consent. In any sexual event there will be one person who initiates and one who’s initiated upon. I suspect ‘going along with’ your initiation, whatever it may be, will not be considered proof of consent, depending on the situation. In theory, if gender bias doesn’t enter into the equation, any two parties will t…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 08:18 PM
1

Absolutely matters, and I think it should matter for everyone. Political leaning translates 1-for-1 into attitudes about sex. I couldn't go near a lefty since they see no issue with premarital sex and I'd be pressured.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 01:12 PM
3

Which women do you mean? I see all kinds of women these days who don't give a toss about their male partner; disregarding his consent, cheating behind his back, caring only about herself. That's fucked up in itself, but it's a far cry from disregarding yourself to please someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 12:20 PM
1

As a child I only remember crying over physical injury (makes sense, shedding tears is a natural painkiller) and as an adult it took extreme abuse. But being sad about something, even extremely sad? The reflex doesn’t exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 05:33 PM
1

Women who express an interest in me disproportionately admit to being into BDSM. I’m still trying to find the source of the correlation
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 05:08 PM
2

odds are she's slept with a guy she just met That’s not a woman I’d be comfortable sticking my dick in under any circumstances. I would fear for my health. You want a traditional relationship: in current year 🤣 good luck buddy, but at the end of the day what choice do you have but to pay? If a traditional relationship is off the table then I just won’t go on dates.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 05:06 PM
7

I know plenty of guys over 30 dating women in their 20s; common denominator is that they look young and healthy themselves, you'd never think to look at them that one was over 30. Conversely, when I was only 20 I caught the attention of a handful of women just over 30, but the ones who felt comfortable making the approach didn't look 30, they still looked young. Makes me think it's a looksmatch thing
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/21 10:15 AM
0

Don’t approach her, she’ll approach you. Just look free and available.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/21 07:14 PM
4

but regardless, if most all women are wired the same way They’re not. Neither are men. We’ve got multiple reproductive strategies bouncing around the gene pool and which one you inherit is a dice roll
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/21 06:08 PM
8

I think men just generally don’t prioritize a lot of the ins-and-outs of ‘being organized’, which puts a lot of pressure on women when they end up organizing for two, and falling into that ‘mom’ roll. Ask any guy, he’d probably be happy enough with a woman whose standards for a clean house are as low as his seem to be. My own parents are admittedly a reversal of the trend Im proposing, and it’s not like either of them are too lazy to clean, it’s that father is terribly anal about it and mom is s…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/21 06:06 PM
2

Premarital sex is a no-go for me, as is wifing up anyone who's been into it. A girl like that I'd expect to be really vanilla, so it's like, you get what you accept. Now, if a girl like that suddenly busts out the "can we try something absolutely degenerate?" I'd be surprised, but it's not like I'd tell her no or anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/21 12:17 AM
1

You wake up one evening in a strange room with a slight concussion, notice your wrists have been bound and she's standing over you in a low-cut crop top going 'oh, you're finally awake'.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/21 02:11 AM
2

Based on all the single mothers I know, if you're a married mother you're probably relying on only two people, yourself and your husband, to get everything done that needs to be. This is true regardless of the amount of work the husband puts in. When you're a single mother help with the child is coming from Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins... When I was in highschool our single-mother cousin needing a babysitter was considered a great excuse to see our baby second-cousin, who everyone just l…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/21 11:31 AM
1

Effeminate men, in my experience, still do plenty of work, earn money the same way all the other men do; that's not the exclusive realm of dudes with enormous biceps and buzz-cuts. What we're seeing isn't so much a decrease in masculinity as an increase in the workplace value of nerds over meatheads, now that there's the technology for it. K-pop dudes, on the other hand, are celebrities and largely popular with women, who like the aesthetic, and there are perfectly masculine, tradtional-gender-r…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/21 12:18 PM
4

I love my children, my freedom and love being alone. Oi, well there's your problem. If my first marriage had produced kids, freeing me from having to worry about that, I certainly wouldn't be looking to remarry. My pair-bonding is stunted and kids are my only motivation to even talk to women anymore. I don't know that I'm necessarily happier alone, though. I just cringe at the thought that I'm forced, for the sake of the kids, to get into a relationship that won't be good enough to maintain exce…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/21 10:28 AM
2

Avoid bringing it up until after she’s slept with you. use the fingers. The clitoris is in the front, small nub-like thing, just feel around for it, it’s not hard to find. Circular motions. That alone will convince most women you’ve done this before. If she asks after the fact, go ahead and casually mention ‘ah, no, haven’t done that before’ if you did it right she should be beyond the point of caring
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 11:39 PM
1

If I was capable of maintaining a relationship with someone I had no physical attraction to... I'd be gay. I wanna have kids, sure, but fertility clinics jump on the opportunity to give gay men options. I'd just get fake-gay-married for the fertility clinic help.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 12:14 PM
1

Have you?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/21 03:53 PM
1

increase our chances of finding partners who love us and see us as special due to the unique, irreplaceable connection we share. I can think of a good handful of things I’ve heard women say to imply that a relationship can function if she’s into him without the reverse being true; comments which I’d like some insight on, how true is this?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 07:54 PM
5

To cheaters or would be cheaters - If you’re an adult then have an open or poly relationship In every open relationship I’ve had the displeasure of observing, the partner who requested it was an abuser.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 03:52 PM
1

I know a guy; Really nice guy, generally inoffensive, gives more than he takes, with his friends. Same guy manages to get all kinds of women, with a different approach for each. With some, he’s an absolute prick, and gets laid, some he’s just the embodiment of a capital N Nice guy, and gets laid. Sometimes he shrinks down and plays a shy virgin: and gets laid. And the kicker is, you can tell which personality will get you results just by looking at a woman, their looks tell you everything you ne…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 11:52 AM
-2

This came up in a recent discussion I had; I want biological kids, out in the world, to fulfil that biological imperative and have a legacy. That pretty much excludes childfree women from my pool of potentials, but I was asked, basically, ‘if you could have an arrangement, for whatever reason you’re helping along some unrelated couple with fertility issues and they’re having your biological kid(s), meanwhile there’s a childfree woman who’s into you’ I think I’d take that trade, at the risk of so…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/21 02:56 PM
17

Men are more into relationships when really young (when they think women are special). Older men want the family...heir, not the relationship really. Oh no, they're onto me. But yeah, this is accurate
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/21 11:48 PM
2

I'm sure she would; she can skip over me in that case
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/21 12:25 PM
0

Easy; having experienced first-hand the kind of damage that experience does to pair-bonding, I can't afford to throw more baggage onto the pile.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/21 12:19 PM
-1

I think the point of the mantra is that a woman who's getting railed by Chads while I'm trying to build myself up shouldn't expect that, if I'm lucky enough to hit it big in my late 20's-Early 30's, she can just scoop me up and lay claim to my hard work. If I cross this 'finish line' next year, say, and find a handful of women there waiting for me, I'll pick one who's younger and less experienced, every time. I am a divorcee, though; statistically we marry into larger age gaps the second time ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/21 11:21 AM
1

If a woman pays expensive dinners and trips for me, I’m a trophy; she puts the work in because I’ve got inherent value. Of course a woman would feel bad about leaving that position; she’d be demoted from inherently valuable to having to put in the work because she can’t just be carried by her beauty. The reverse of that is an upgrade.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 07:04 PM
10

I’ll imagine a scenario here; I suddenly come into money. Like a lot of money. Plus my appearance improves, I get more fit and everything. Some girl who was off fucking Chads in high school is still single and now interested in me, but I can manage to attract younger college-age nice church girls now, with my status. What argument can my old high school classmate actually put forth that she ‘deserves’ me? What entitlement has she got to me, honestly?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 06:56 PM
3

I dunno, that’s pretty much the same argument as calling a woman free game if she’s a slut; a bit worse than that really because it’s presupposing the sluttiness of men in general and then arguing based off that. I mean, picture a scenario where a woman doesn’t get consent from the guy, she just jumps on him, holds him down, does what she wants. Best case scenario he was wanting to shack up with her anyway and consents retroactively. She didn’t know that, so it’s still rape, but at least he’s no…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 06:46 PM
3

Is this the hill we’re dying on? “It’s not rape because he probably liked it”?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 06:35 PM
1

Well, the full story is that when I say I’m not a fan of makeup, that’s vetting. But, also, in terms of aesthetics I can honestly say that any attractive woman I’ve seen without makeup looked leagues better without it. Ugly women, sure; the makeup is an improvement.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 02:52 PM
2

If you have to practically chase after them, they are not into you! Yeah that’s why I don’t approach women. If I have to I’m already not good enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/21 08:29 PM
2

I’m upset that more men aren’t doing something about it; sure you get the virgins who simp for any woman with a pulse; the starved dogs, but what the fuck is up with celebrities who are attested on national fucking TV banging every woman stateside and then settling down with a divorced women with a couple of kids? Their needs are met, there’s no good reason for them to want the burden of a wife now that their pair-bonding is broken beyond reasonable repair, hell they divorce after a few days in …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/21 07:37 PM
1

If I'm a middle class guy hoping to find someone to have kids with, then yeah, she should have an income as well to make sure we meet the standard threshold of a 2-parent family income. But on the flip side, and going off my own ex-marriage trauma, certain jobs I wouldn't accept at all and indeed if I struck billions tomorrow and got approached by a woman, her having a job at all would be a dealbreaker.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/21 11:34 AM
5

I don't believe a commitment or romance is really even worth the effort if you're not special to eachother; sex is the most intimacy you can get and so if your partner isn't the one and only to get that from you then there's nowhere higher to go. As an unwilling divorcee I think that excludes me from being fit to date myself, but even the most Christian of Christian women seem to be "willing to forgive", in my very specific case. So, given that fact, if she wants to undergo the massive project o…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/21 01:04 PM
1

Now the deeper stuff. Isn't the process alone, from going through all different levels, doing all different types of things the "real award"? Is getting to the point of sex within a romantic relationship the ‘real reward’ vis-a-vis seeing an escort? Yeah, but it’s that way vis-a-vis picking up a bar slut for casual sex too, which is what an escort is really a substitute for. And if it’s casual sex we’re talking about, you don’t really skip that many steps with pure ‘pay-to-win’ strategy; if you …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/21 04:32 PM
1

This is why I hate mobile games. I can pay somewhere in the ballpark of $50~$100 for a console title that offers decent graphics and gameplay that only asks me to hone my skill with practice, or I can download a ‘free’ game with no real depth to it save for a rigged RNG that kills me and then demands I either pay a dollar or sit through an ad to try again.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/21 04:08 PM
1

I’ve read a statistic that men who remarry tend to go younger, and with an inflated age gap. I’m 27 and divorced and in line with said statistic I’ve got an aversion to women over 24.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/21 09:22 AM
2

Not to bring in another prairie vole comparison, but it turns out males with previous bonding experience weren't bonding so well with a second partner if they didn't mate fast enough; probably because it's too heavy a source of oxytocin/vasopressin and if you've already experienced it that's your 'bar' now. of course, this bar is less of a problem for a virgin, but if sex is more special to him than it is to her, because she's had it before, he's not going to be happy about that, either.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/21 12:26 PM
57

Youthful mistakes I’m willing to give certain women the benefit of the doubt in saying it’s this; I’ve listened to a few admit to thinking men were vending machines that you could put sex into and have a relationship pop out.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/21 07:45 PM
2

This is, actually useful, will do
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/21 10:54 PM
1

while I was abroad? they just kinda approached me after class
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/21 09:03 PM
2

is it your natural looks? Height 6’3, trying to get back the jawline I had a few years back (help a guy out?), thin... In China I got constant offers because foreigner bonus, now that I’m in a position to take them I’m really just trying to get back to Asia and eat healthy enough to de-age a bit. tldr; looks don’t seem to be an obstacle. lifestyle I don’t get many opportunities to meet people outside of OLD; Not a big bar fan and It’s not like I’m in Uni anymore meeting women. I’d blame my age b…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/21 06:56 PM
5

boob to belly ratio I was thinking to myself; some women are fat but also fairly attractive to me, and it’s a wonder to me why I couldn’t place the difference, but that’s exactly it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/21 06:22 PM
2

I need this power badly
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/21 05:04 PM
9

If your woman is so desperate to keep you around that she’ll forgive cheating, she’s probably not high enough in value to be worth the monetary investments you’re making into the relationship. Always look for the best deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/21 05:13 PM
4

I believe that's just another way of putting down women. A typical misogynist narrative: if a woman doesn't do what I want, she must have a mental illness or in this case "daddy issues". Oh, boy. How many times have I heard women put down men like “he won’t do what I want, he’s ‘uncomfortable’ with what I’m trying to force on him; must be a Momma’s boy trying not to do anything that would upset mommy.” A lot, it’s a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/21 04:31 PM
1

I mean, if you can find a rich guy who's willing to treat you to the sugar bowl then more power to you; I'd do the same myself, Just be honest about it. I guess that puts me outside the scope of the people you're debunking. Still, it's hardly coherent to judge lazy guys when the idea behind sugaring is to just not do work yourself. I know most guy's looks can't carry them, but most women's looks can't either when the top rich guys are as picky as they are. Women usually invest way more emotional…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/21 01:03 PM
4

I, too, would like an elaboration
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 04:49 PM
1

I could say Christian as a matter of family background, but I haven’t been to a religious facility in years
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 04:39 PM
1

Most women and men under the age of 35 on average are very immature and have no idea what they want. Pick your poison; you want the former party girl whose libido finally tanked out so she’s ready to settle with a man whose not getting the enthusiastic sex she gave others and can forget about head Or do you want the divorcee who settled early, foregoing his fun on promise of the perfect connection and now just wants the fun he never got to have. Commitment? What’s that?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 04:31 PM
1

Morally, yes, but the problems are the same
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 04:09 PM
1

I’ve met all kinds of women who are saving themselves for marriage but insist that they, and women like them would gladly forgive my male impurity. I can’t even forgive my impurity, so I have to wonder how committed these women are to the concept.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 03:09 PM
1

They don't even need to invade; It doesn't matter how many muscle-men and high-tech weapons we have if our democratic process is electing people who refuse to beat the oppressiveness out of people from backwards cultures who just keep coming here. We beat White men over the head for failing to use gender-sensitive language but when a horde of Islamists go around raping women indiscriminately it's just their "culture". I swear, if the Chinese learn to fake-cry the way American and British muslims…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 10:13 AM
1

It’s lazy advice and I’m in a uniquely good position to prove it. The same exact advice is parroted every time, solicited or not, by people who’ve just decided they need to give you advice. For me, post divorce and with my priorities lying where they do?: Hey, it’s been a while, why don’t you try to put yourself back out there? Nah, I would never be satisfied with a woman I can’t pair-bond to; if I can’t call her my first and only, or experience the uniqueness of losing my virginity to her, She’…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 03:41 AM
2

Losers who commit and then complain about it, maybe, but choosing not to commit is just his right, nobody’s forcing him to.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 03:24 AM
1

I don’t know about anyone else, but if for some reason I were having sex with a woman who hadn’t first passed the ‘friendship’ threshold that interaction would be relegated to ‘casual sex’ with no hope of escape. In fact, even if I was having regular sex with someone like that, and whatever else you’d describe as ‘relationship stuff’, I’d still tell you I have no girlfriend. If you insisted I did, and I had a good platonic female friend who maybe hugs me every so often, I might confusedly ask if…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/21 12:10 AM
-1

Tells me that hoes ain’t loyal, is all it tells me
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/21 08:22 PM
21

Dude, if a woman was buying me dinner I'd want people to know. Especially if she was close to me in age, how often do you meet real life male sugar baby material. I'd be like "I'm worth it".
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/21 09:13 PM
1

definitely have to agree there; I can attest personally to the idea that this 'friend zone' fiasco is partly to blame on peoples' insistence on dating strangers only.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/21 09:08 PM
2

To what extent does personality matter? As a category, personality is home to more deal breakers than any other category. What do you think constitutes a good personality for dating as a man? One woman's ideal is another woman's insufferable, is the impression that I get. IDK I'm not a woman. What do you think constitutes a good personality for dating as a woman? The ideal personality for a woman is like candy; all flavours are good, provided they're sweet. To what extent can less-than-ideal loo…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/21 05:49 PM
1

immediately aware of their romantic and physical attraction to one another. "Romantic", really? Unless you're one of those 'love at first sight' types, maybe. Gotta vet before you know romance. I mean, physical attraction, sure, but there are men who can be physically attracted to a hotly drawn woman, it doesn't mean much.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/21 10:49 AM
1

I’m in Eastern Canada. Because of reluctance to respond to sexual advances I’ve definitely had women give up on trying to go anywhere with dating, even if those advances were uncomfortably early. I’m sure a religious woman who’s waiting until marriage around here would be more inclined to transition first from friendship to a relationship, unless maybe they want the first “date” to be as early on as possible to establish intention. That’s certainly the type I’d prefer at any rate, and the only t…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/21 05:09 PM
1

as far as OLD goes? Feels like a half-decent number of opportunities pop up but I can't seal a deal for shit. For instance with one girl who was making blatant advances I may have taken too long to act on them, and they stopped once we got too close as friends. Recently I was talking to a match, asked what she was on OLD for; she says "looking for something serious hbu?" I respond simply, "eh, depends" and she switches tone immediately to "oh well a casual fling is fine too". I'm half disappoint…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/21 01:45 PM
3

I've got plenty of female friendships that I do value, but I can see where these guys are coming from in that the number of women who aren't interesting enough to be friends with seem to make for a plurality; in other words, there are a lot of "basic bitches" out there. I wouldn't value a relationship with such a woman, either; She's got to be friend material before she can ever be relationship material. I think a lot of men don't want the burden of a friendship with a woman specifically because…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/21 01:29 PM
5

Is the height thing even a thing or is it just a meme? I'm about 6'3" and it really doesn't get me any attention to be so.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/21 12:27 PM
1

It’s sexist, and it should be equal. Tell women that? Most of my not wanting to remarry post-divorce is that I'd only accept being a virgin marrying another virgin. No double standard there, but then any woman I meet who's interested says she's more than happy to forgive me my fuck-up, even strict, abstinent christian women. Saying something is a double standard is kind of like saying; why should a customer pay money for a loaf of bread? They're getting a loaf of bread they should give a loaf of…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/21 10:32 AM
2

Assuming I wake up one day married and this happens after the issue of having kids has been squared away, I just might? But I do get off on kissing pretty hardcore so I should hope that enjoying that a little too much isn’t a loophole or anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/21 08:45 PM
4

It’s a good question; I know what a 6 looks like, and I know what a 4 looks like, but it’s hard to think what would make for a 5/10 woman, assuming 6 or higher is ‘attractive’ and 4 or lower is ‘unattractive’ If I’m speaking just for myself, 5 would probably be what passes for the most attractive girl at a night club? Sure they’ve got the symmetry in their face and stuff but I absolutely hate the aesthetic. 6-10 is populated with a surprising number of plain-looking women; fanciness doesn’t seem…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/21 03:23 PM
2

Q1-Is ''John Shaming'' (guys paying for sex) mostly a Western thing? When I was in China groups of friends out for some Shaokao (outdoor bbq) would end their night by just all going to a red light street, splitting up and meeting back when they’re done. Some women who were dead-bedrooming their men would even tell him outright to go there instead. If I understand correctly the same culture exists in Japan, to some smaller extent. Q2-Do you really think it's about paying for sex the problem (pros…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/21 12:07 AM
2

I mean, you won’t see me whining that fat women should lower their standards or anything, so that some guy more looks matched to her can have his shot; that 10/10 model the fat girl wants may not want her, but let’s be honest, by the time she lowers her standard down to a guy she can settle for, that guy is settling too, because he’s probably also fat and if I know fat guys, they set their sights on models and work their way down to realism. The only difference is that for a fat guy, a fat woman…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/21 06:21 PM
1

Money is a resource that a woman might want to secure by marrying you; If she's the type to try to convince you to do that with sex then you'll get sex, but you're not getting women for ONS with money unless there's something in it for her; maybe "oh we can spend an afternoon on a private jet" or something. I mean, if you had your pick of the litter for ONS but were assured that's all you'd be getting, you wouldn't go with the plain-looking girl who'd be your first pick for wife material, though…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/21 02:17 AM
1

Sometimes I feel like the goldilocks of outgoingness; My extrovert friends spend too much time going to parties or other outings that I just have no interest in, and my introvert friends get overwhelmed by their social anxiety and retire long before I'm satisfied we've had a fulfilling outing. I share more of my interests with introverts, though, so we find more things to do and I'm better at attracting them. That said, if you put a gun to my head and tell me to progress an interaction with the …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/21 02:02 AM
1

Counterpoint; there's a guy in our friendgroup, he's short, he's fat, he's poor, he's got a stutter, relies on tarot card readers for romantic advice, we just managed to convince this guy that the interactions he was having with a girl he liked were borderline stalking; This guy asks us for dating advice. I haven't got the experience to help myself so I offer the bare minimum, our other friends know the guy a little too well; they don't wanna be flinging insults all the time at someone they hang…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/21 01:48 AM
6

OK so first of all, how fucking horny do you have to be to be 'tempted' by scantily clad women who are still covered up enough to be legally allowed out in public? Do you think this is fringe men only? 'fringe' would be panicking so much about your purity that violence is your first response and not a last resort when a relatively thin woman who you could easily overpower is going so far as to physically touch you without your consent. This guy is just insane. How can we stop men from blaming wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/21 01:39 AM
1

finding someone who has their stuff together should be an absolute minimum Depends on the girl, I guess? If I'm already successful and a woman wants me, but what she has on offer in a relationship is that she's a good cheerleader, well then I could have used her when I was building myself up, not now.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/21 01:25 AM
1

How many problems does it solve? Not really any unless someone gets knocked up, squaring away my "want kids and don't have any" issue. regular casual sex or and FWB might in truth give rise to a few problems, though depending what happens the enjoyment might end up being worth it, idk.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/21 01:08 AM
1

Sure, unless you can only be bothered to get into a relationship for the sake of having kids. Once the apathy toward this whole ‘love’ concept sets in you’re either trying to be a fuckboy who’s adamantly against the women you sleep with trying to weasel their way into the rest of your life or you can be bribed into commitment by a woman who’ll pop out a child for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/21 01:18 AM
1

So, I'm divorced from a marriage that I was careful to save my virginity for, in order to make sure there was no lack of appreciation; you get your one and only, no comparison no nothing. I guess you could call whatever came before that a pseudo-ho phase; every kind of sex was completely off the table but there were some similarities. as far as I'm concerned, if you're wanting to settle down you should only be getting sex from that one person, so they get a monopoly on the feeling that comes wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/21 02:54 PM
1

what kind of "charm" are we calling "subtle pressure"? like flirting? Well, like I always say, if you've known her five minutes and she hasn't raped you yet, the only consent you'll be getting from her will be dubious. That's why the ethical way to date is to just make yourself real vulnerable and hope you get a bag thrown over your head by a decent-tier dommy mommy.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/21 12:01 PM
2

Waking up in a strange room a little dizzy with my wrists bound and a woman I’ve never met before standing over me going ‘how many fingers do you see?’
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/21 09:25 PM
1

I think mainly when you describe ‘alpha-widowed’ women, you’re talking about a girl who still thinks about the guy, resents her current partner because he’s not him; it’s different from a woman not ‘pair-bonding’, when sex and intimacy are played out and her partner is nothing special. From what I’ve experienced and heard, men with our instinctual drive toward sexual variety suffer a lot from the later issue, much less so with the former.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/21 08:47 PM
2

Guy 2 if he gets the pair-bonding benefit of being a virgin at marriage, but if you lose that you don’t want to downgrade to being guy 2 a second time; a second marriage or sexual LTR is basically same investment, diminished emotional returns. Between my options of remarriage or switching to being guy 1, I’d go with the later
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/21 12:40 PM
1

Most of the features that makeup emulates on your face are features that, in theory, could be the product of amazing genetics; you contour to make the shape of your face look like you fared better in the genetic lottery, you redden your lips to make it look like you’ve got an impossibly impressive quality of bloodflow, etc. If the makeup makes you look good, it’s not easy to tell how much of the attractiveness you were born with compared to how much is from makeup; therefore we’re forced to make…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/21 02:49 AM
2

If we assume that older people will be more financially stable, and possibly even enough so to take on a provider role for a partner (which, let’s be honest, is the assumption being made by people talking about the ‘wall’) then these richer people both will be better at attracting young, good looking but financially low-grade partners as ‘sugar babies’. However, the fact that men value youth so much more than women do means that the value that this provides to men is greater than what it provide…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/21 09:36 PM
0

I'm probably not the best to answer, but If I was into casual sex, why would I put any effort into her pleasure? I'd save that for someone I love, make it special.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/21 12:31 PM
1

on a side note; there’s oxytocin replacement therapy? where?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 06:09 PM
8

I don’t even think you necessarily need an abundance, as a man, to pump&dump a woman, if she’s up for sex, you want to capitalize on the sex (because you like, never get an offer), but you can see your life worsening if you actually commit to her, for whichever reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/21 03:25 PM
3

...On average, which is the product of the distribution of the genders into different jobs. Jenny the Optometrist is making more or less the same as Rob the Optometrist.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/21 10:39 AM
9

People today, women especially, who hop from relationship to relationship get addicted to ‘new relationship energy’ and get bored in marriage. You see women complaining about and divorcing from boredom en mass. I have my doubts that women who aren’t getting themselves accustomed to constant novelty have the same issues of boredom that drive a lot of divorce in the promiscuous population. Maybe they’re unhappy for other reasons but they’re not problems that can’t be overcome due to the brain’s re…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/21 05:06 PM
1

The reason why they’re miserable in marriage is because when women sleep around and have lots of casual sex, they’re doing it with men who are above their level who would never LTR them. I think it’s more like; when a promiscuous woman gives up promiscuity to settle with just one guy she gets bored with him, being used to variety. A woman who’s willing to wait is one who’s happier with a partner who’s familiar to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/21 02:36 PM
2

Most women who I tell about my situation irl don’t seem to consider me creepy at all, that being that I’m divorced and tell them I won’t be getting into an LTR anymore because the privilege of handing over my virginity to the woman I marry is the only thing that would be worth that marriage commitment to me in the first place. People consider that situation to imply a virgin obsession when they hear it, which they’re not wrong about as far as who I’d consider LTR material in general, but I can’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/21 05:37 PM
1

A stalker? Meh, as it stands my litmus test for ‘does a girl like you?’ Is ‘you wake up one morning with a slight concussion, wrists bound and she’s standing over you going ‘how many fingers do you see?’’.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/21 09:44 PM
20

I don’t think I’m ‘disrespectful’ per se, but I do find that women show more interest in me the more unlikable I behave. maybe a correlation there.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/21 04:59 PM
1

Well if we’re speaking from personal experience, I seem to be popular with women who are doing the whole ‘open relationship’ thing, though it isn’t something I can get behind myself. Women intent on cheating behind their partners’ backs on the other hand, aren’t approaching me so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/21 04:54 PM
2

Male Physical touch 110%. I guess second would be words of affirmation. did you experience them to be of importance in your previous dating/relationship experience? I do a lot of complaining about my ex-wife on here, and when your wife treats your wanting physical intimacy as a "sick fucking fetish" you leave that marriage with a lot to complain about.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/21 10:39 PM
2

40% of women said they climaxed during their last hookup, compared to 80% of men. If you didn’t cum then how do you know when it’s over?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/21 03:09 PM
2

I prefer one who saves herself personally, but I had likewise saved myself before I was married the first time, and I dislike the position that divorce puts me in to not be able to enter into a relationship having saved myself for only her, to the point that a relationship seems like it’d be wasted on me. I know for myself the kind of reduction in ‘strong feelings’ for a future partner I would suffer from not getting to lose my virginity to her, and so I also know that if I was still ‘pure’ I mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/21 06:52 PM
1

However vibrators won’t cause the same problem if they are not overused( a short vibe session is every now or semi regularly won’t cause problems) I'm way out of my field commenting on this, but I generally agree; the average woman, as far as I've been told by people who speak openly about this stuff, isn't likely to overuse them; those that do I've heard complain about lack of sensitivity. Warped expectations don't appear to be a problem AFAIK.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/21 02:15 AM
1

Honestly in a hypothetical hookup situation I'd be infinitely more comfortable using a vibrator on her than to risk putting my dick in a stranger. Thank god for them, really.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/21 02:07 AM
0

The thing is with wanting a girl with a low or no body count, is does she want you? The odds are in my favour. On OLD for instance if I match someone whose bio indicates she’s a party girl, presumably high N, I’m unmatched before I’ve even sent a message. The ones who do give me the time of day eventually end up casually mentioning being virgin or extremely low N, with almost every exception being a single mother. actually locating a virgin may be an obstacle, but getting one interested is absol…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 04:14 AM
2

If my only concern was that nobody will want me, since I’m divorced, I’d have those worries dispelled fairly quickly when women continued to want me, but the way it’s impacted my own emotions and my own attachment is something I’m having to experience first-hand; I’m not enjoying a relationship any time soon. Not that that’s hurt my value as a mate at all; I’m more sought after now than I was then, I just don’t get to enjoy it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/20 04:11 PM
2

I mean, independently of what this study says, virginity loss has certainly been causing me the types of difficulty in feeling any bonding toward someone that would account for that 6% of respondents who lost marital satisfaction as a consequence. I do think that the amount of self-reporting we’re seeing here may skew the numbers; some studies show likelihood of divorce also increasing with N count, for instance, so those separations could skew the numbers by trimming the couples hit hardest by …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/20 03:02 PM
2

For men, there aren’t statistically significant differences in marital quality between men who have two partners and more than two. “Low N” is basically ppd’s attempt at a compromise that puts the pressure of finding a virgin off of them. I’m an unwilling divorcee myself and it’s abundantly clear to me that the experience is ruined forever, but people insist on telling me ‘it’s not that bad, at least you weren’t sleeping around indiscriminately’. Wouldn’t have made a difference; only virginity m…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/20 02:10 PM
1

With my N of exactly 1, from a marriage ending in abandonment, I can at least tell you what a hypothetical virgin woman would be getting from me, point-for-point. Is it better if he’s never slept with anyone like her or if he’s more experienced? I’m extremely discouraged that missing out on sharing that first time with someone could mean missing out on feeling attached enough to her to be happy in a relationship; since there’s no shortage of women who insist they can ‘fix’ someone like me I vet …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/20 01:38 PM
1

When I was preserving my virginity strictly for marriage, so as to make the experience special and create a perfect bond with my one partner, I would think that was virtuous, as in theory it should have lead to a good outcome. When she turned out to be an adulteress though? Suddenly that first time I had elevated so much wasn’t available to experience with someone who I’d actually be committing to, effectively ruining any future relationships before they started because they just don’t meet that…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/20 03:21 PM
1

I do; in fact I’ve got what appears to be two iterations of the same study plus a third, https://www.northeastern.edu/rise/presentations/rewritable-fidelity-how-monogamous-pair-bond-are-affected-by-a-history-of-previous-bonding-experience-in-the-prairie-vole-microtus-ochrogaster/ As far as I can tell this is the earlier study. Whereas naive males showed a clear preference for their partners during their first pair bond, repeated bonding led to a gradual decline in social selectivity. the males d…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/20 03:17 PM
25

A woman that she also has had her fill of handsome, good-looking guys and is just looking for someone more stable, so she has the incentive to make it work. I used to be extremely wealthy, and had a girl who I loved a lot, made her the centre of my life and spent all my money on her. Now I’m with you, I really don’t feel that strongly and I don’t spend any money on you, partially because I’m not as attracted to you as I was to her and partly because I spent so much on her that I went from wealth…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/20 01:54 PM
1

At this point you might be asking how is this relevant? It's relevant because if casual sex reduces a woman's ability to pair-bond, how come that nobody claims that oxytocin release from visiting many massage parlors, overeating or traveling to the tropics also hurts pair-bonding in women (or in men, for that matter)? the amount is different. It’s the same reason something like heroin is more addictive than something less potent like sugar. why the belief that a woman who slept with 20 different…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/20 01:02 PM
3

A girl taller than me would be absolutely ok by me. I’m like 6’3” (~190CM) though so it’s not happening, at any rate.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/20 04:32 PM
1

Well for me (male) personally I’m pretty adamant that lack of virginity precludes me from the type of attachment that I would have wanted in a relationship; like I think I’m pretty consistent on that. Women, on the other hand, don’t mind that I’ve lost mine and some even still want me. There’s a disconnect between what these men (like me) want and what women (like the ones who insist they’re still interested in me) want. When I turn down these women and get demanded for an explanation, I should …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/20 04:01 PM
1

about 5’9”. It’s Canada
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/20 01:28 PM
1

nope, pretty thin. not a lot of muscle though
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/20 03:15 AM
1

BUT I feel like some guys will overestimated height. As a guy who's like 6'3" and just doesn't get womens' attention at all ever, yeah they overestimate it a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/20 01:14 AM
2

access to abortions are crucial as a last resort. Pro-lifer here. Yes, last resort. So let's be up front - a fetus is NOT a baby. Even if it is- doesn't the existing woman's life take precedence? Is she killing it as a last resort or just because it's inconvenient? In modern society, abortion is important as women and couples have other things to balance than just childbirth. An unwanted baby can ruin a life or career. That sounds like a decent reason not to conceive one in the first place. I kn…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/20 12:53 AM
1

When have you ever seen a normal, healthy woman more attracted to a man after he does something bad/rude? If I’m honest? I haven’t actually taken notice of other men being assholes and getting laid for it, but when I’m talking to women, the few times I’ve gotten unsolicited nudes have been times that I’ve felt maybe I’ve been unduely rude to her. I’m not super vocal about “women only like assholes” though.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/20 08:33 PM
3

I'm not saying it's a problem; I'm just saying it's the reason that so many men consider sex to be a favor from a woman, for a man. They're not picky (not with casual sex, anyway) and women are, ergo the man is the one "earning" it when it does happen. As far as having a worse time of it goes, I mean, that's hit-or-miss regardless of who she picks. Chad who goes home with a woman he just met very easily might well just jackhammer it every time; if he's discreet enough about who he's fucking they…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/20 11:36 PM
2

My point is that women who are having casual sex are having it with men who meet a relatively lofty standard of attractiveness. With men the mentality is ‘if you’re not going to marry her then what do you care how attractive she is; she’s letting you so just smash the pussy and get out of there.’ If a man turns down a woman for casual sex, nine times out of ten it’s an objection to casual sex itself as opposed to not thinking she’s not fuckable enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/20 10:14 PM
1

these guys cannot fathom that women are having sex for their own selfish reasons. I mean, depending on the girl, they do, of course, however; if a man is out looking for casual sex, most any woman will do, while a woman tends to have more options and won't simply grab the nearest guy because she wants something casual.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/20 04:41 PM
2

If they were, N count wouldn’t matter. But they’re human, so it does.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/20 06:39 PM
1

Is that really any different from a woman who’s slept around and then marries a guy with the exact same flaws? If she’s not religious then she’d be more likely to walk out on him, but knowing that I should hope they don’t marry in the first place. OK, theoretically she’s test-driving the guy before then, but say I’m a guy who won’t sleep with a woman before marriage; what benefit do I get marrying a woman who’s slept around vs. a virgin if neither are allowed to test drive me?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/20 03:05 AM
2

And me personally, I don't want my girl to have a high body count because I want the sex to be special. Pretty simple, if I'm the second time a girl has slept with someone the sex is much more special than the 20th person. even being the second; where sex is special but someone else got the first, which is the most special... One year on from divorce and I’m still not comfortable with the prospect of giving a woman my second. It’s not a valuable enough instance of sex to be befitting of a woman …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/20 02:34 AM
1

When male Voles establish pair-bonds with their monogamous mate, it activates a function in their brain which basically changes the type of dopamine that will be released during sex with a different female, should they choose to cheat. This prevents the formation of a second pair bond to override the first, which prevents the male from trading their long-term partner in for a new one. I definitely think there are some human men who operate that way as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/20 11:26 PM
-1

I mean, this CMV in itself is coming from the perspective of someone to whom sex has long since ceased to be ‘special’ and now basically has no meaning. The problem that I find with that is; thanks to the release of relevant hormones, sex is the most potent action for giving someone those feelings of intimacy and attachment to their partner, it’s like a finish line for intimacy. As a divorcee with an N of literally just the one, I’m already not satisfied to commit to someone else when I don’t ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/20 10:07 AM
1

The whole women's breast being highly sexualized thing is pretty much the reason why women can't be completely topless in public, and I think that's pretty sad. Really though, what situations are men going around topless to begin with? Usually the same situations where women are in a bikini or something. That may not be topless but it's pretty darn close, it's definitely a "sexualized" level of undress to be in. If you're a guy at the beach wearing a pair of swim shorts, you're revealing basical…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/20 12:02 PM
1

I can't help but think that the logical extreme of that, though, is that tribesmen out in the jungle who outright don't have a concept of "clothing" should be hit by mass erectile dysfunction. people in most countries walk around with their face out all day, doesn't stop me from judging a good-looking face as "sexy" and, if it came down to sex, getting aroused by said good-looking face.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/20 10:33 AM
1

TIL the reproductive strategy employed by fairies is employed by an actual animal. Terrifying
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/20 04:43 PM
4

iirc the cuckoo bird doesn’t literally fuck its’ neighbours mate but instead sneaks its’ eggs into other birds’ nests. that’s kinda worse in a way; they’re pushing the raising of a child that belongs to neither the male or the female that’s raising it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/20 01:12 PM
1

I think as far as emotional baggage goes, that’s something people are trying to avoid by going with a virgin woman. On my part, not getting to still be virgin is source of enough baggage to outright disqualify me from relationships altogether, so it’s not like there’s any winning either way.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/20 01:07 PM
2

basically early-to-mid-20's white women. Mind you I don't live in some big Metropolitan city, and with the exception of the area nearby the local University we're a lot more ethnically homogenous here than in the rest of the country, so that might have something to do with it, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/20 12:27 PM
6

If any of your ex's were more physically attractive? That's the ultimate jealousy-inducing factoid that will never leave her brain. It doesn't matter how terrible of a person that ex was. When I’m talking to women trying to arrange dates or what have you and it gets to the point where she asks a question that forces me to disclose that I’m divorced, well, that’s always fine, and when she asks why I make it clear enough that she was pretty abusive. more than a couple of otherwise interested girls…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/20 02:02 AM
2

Not so much sex, but after a poor marriage that was lacking heavily in affection I do feel pretty entitled to X's and O's, so I can vouch for entitlement stemming sometimes from disappointment and not from being spoiled.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/20 11:49 AM
2

It's more the fact that there aren't enough fuckboys to go around. Sure these women can all sleep with Chad and sure they can all date him for some length of time, but legally Chad can only marry the one woman, and that's if he decides he wants to marry in the first place. I'd imagine if you're a guy who's already managed to knock someone up then you with your genetic legacy squared away wouldn't care to marry unless she was really great.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/20 11:40 AM
1

So how often is this true, if you had to estimate a percentage? I haven’t got the experience to make any sort of a decent guess, but maybe more than half? Have you ever had a partner like this, and if so did you try to bring up a solution for better sex? Did it work? The ex-wife behaved like this, she was terrible. literally just Starfished everything, and furthermore got upset if I tried to do anything more than just jackhammer. Is this kind of sexual apathy more common in ONS? I can’t speak sp…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/20 10:36 PM
2

Lacking in terms of novelty, maybe, and in that level of intimacy not standing as the only tier of its kind in memory. That said, you hear a lot of this trope around here of the female fantasy of being that special girl who ‘fixes’ the broken guy. I don’t think that fantasy would exist if it wasn’t under some circumstance attainable, so for a woman who can do that I can at least offer fulfillment of said fantasy. Plus the narrative of being ruined and then restored (by someone exceptional) prese…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/20 07:27 PM
4

Sex, imo, is something special. It's a physical way to say you love someone, or at least care for them very much and want to see them happy and give them pleasure. I don't want to be with someone who doesn't share that mindset. That’s certainly the mindset I’ve got, but after being abandoned in one marriage it’s that exact mindset that lead to me giving up; loving someone enough to give her my virginity is the most I can offer, and how am I supposed to love a woman if the most I can feel for her…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/20 06:22 PM
3

I love cooking because you can straight-up invent your own recipes. Anything in my life I can get away with personalizing, I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/20 11:50 AM
1

You could selectively erase certain parts, like just the sex so you get the satisfaction of discovering it for the first time with a new partner. And like the movie shows, you would lose all the good with all the hurt. good memories are just pointless bullshit to compare a new partner to, anyway. I’d just maintain only the bad and start fresh to where my new partner makes me feel “like I never have before”. I don’t need some unnecessarily raised bar, I want the girl who picks me to have a piss-e…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/20 02:18 AM
1

I’ll weigh in as a divorcé with what I’ve observed Would women therefore feel that their marriage is less desirable, and maybe feel less special? I worry that if I try to date another woman it won’t be a special enough experience and I’ll either let her down by not being in love enough or... No, you know what? Letting her down has nothing to do with it, I won’t be sufficiently in love for the relationship to make me happy and so I’ll be dissatisfied. No woman I’ve ever told about this worry beli…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/20 02:09 AM
1

Men seemly move on and are able to maintain relationships after a break up much faster than women, but are often not able to properly process thier emotions before committing to the next woman. Did someone say “prairie voles study”? Ok, so, a group of researchers wanted to see whether (male) monogamous prairie voles can reassign their pair-bonding after separating from the first partner, and moreover whether a second bond was as good as the first. Time was a factor they looked at. one experiment…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/20 01:21 AM
0

Yeah, so I could make whoever’s still willing to marry me my first, complete with novelty and butterflies. Reason being I can’t get off to anything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/20 01:05 AM
3

A woman who insists on having three different husbands sounds to me like the type who'd allow me to get her pregnant instead of any of the three without making me join her harem in exchange. That to me seems like a much better deal than taking responsibility for a woman who's getting dicked by other dudes and probably doesn't care for me at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/20 11:55 PM
2

I notice in this article that women appear twice as influenced by environmental factors than men, which brings some points to mind: How many women have you seen talking about how they want a man of a specific height, or those memes where they mock short guys while listing a specific number of feet and inches, and how many of those body-positivity types have you heard saying something to the effect of "weight is just a number on a scale" as though this is something they can just refuse to disclos…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/20 11:44 PM
1

It’s only anecdotal but I have had the experience several times of having female friends whose personalities I liked a lot (though not necessarily highly attracted to at the time) and then some time later down the line being attracted to strangers’ appearance with similar facial features. no idea if one influenced the other or what the story is there.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/20 05:06 PM
2

Plus also, vis-a-vis other people you probably share that much DNA that the “special” you contribute is like, one mutation that can potentially propagate like wildfire into the population. There’s no sense In Thinking of it as your genes being ‘diluted’ when the gene responsible for your own unique identity can spread in the population. So it’s more like: Gen 1: two kids with 99.9% of your DNA, they inherit mutations A B C and D that are unique to you between them Gen 2: four grandkids with vari…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/20 03:35 AM
2

I wonder how many of Ghengis Khan’s kids were raised by some cuck father and how many by their single mother alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/20 03:20 AM
3

I mean, I do agree, but as far as the benefits of a relationship go, a lot of the time you’re only really in the relationship in the first place to feel good.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/20 03:52 AM
2

only problem i have with that is that looking at a relationship objectively is a good way to quickly get dissatisfied with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/20 03:14 AM
0

Species with females with promiscuous tendencies tend to have more evolutionary pressure put on the males in favour of mate guarding, up to and including chemical means. This applies even if the males are promiscuous because sexual fidelity in females generally favours their male counterparts’ reproductive success
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/20 05:31 PM
1

Why not though? It would make perfect evolutionary sense for seminal and/or vaginal fluids to contain chemicals that elicit a reaction that helps keep a partner satisfied, and thereby faithful.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/20 04:26 PM
0

I’ll run a cost-benefit analysis Divorced woman: Pros: lower number, marriage-minded Cons: First was probably special to her (can’t measure up), almost certainly had unprotected sex (footnote 1), possibly divorced because she’s just easily dissatisfied, standards likely raised in midst of trauma “slut”: Pros: if never been raw-dogged, see (footnote 1), No one guy up on a pedestal Cons: visceral disgust, sex not special to her anymore, probably not the type to commit anyway, same investment for l…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/20 01:55 PM
3

upvoting for truth, but it’s a sad and tearful upvote.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/20 08:31 PM
4

I’ve experienced the same thing, although not getting those virginity butterflies and the ensuing oneitis upsets me. what I wouldn’t give to be able to still feel those; sex is pretty garbage without them. Of course, I can’t speak to whether the nuts busted with a proper harem are adequate compensation for a oneitis nut, but I imagine the harem would have to be sizeable.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/20 08:28 PM
-2

Unless you've become a born again Christian or something and decided that you feel devalued for your past and you hate yourself for it and you don't want to be part of that lifestyle anymore 🙄 My situation makes this the convenient answer, but some still call it hypocritical. Not that I mind being hypocritical if it's better for me that way anyway, and I can get away with it, which anecdotal evidence suggests I can.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/20 11:49 AM
1

or do those not count because of some gatekeeping nonsense? Not gonna argue semantics just to discredit mobile games, but the women playing candy crush on their lunch break aren’t on average interested in, say, discussing how to optimize a low-turn-count playthrough.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/20 03:04 AM
6

I think the problems are different, on average. In both cases you have to deal with sex not having it’s specialness, which in itself is fine, but what follows is different between men and women; Women, it seems to me, still appear to want a relationship after sleeping around; only thing is, a lot of men aren’t interested; sex is the height of intimacy for them and if that’s not special to her, then she doesn’t value him for intimacy, clearly, since it’s so run-of-the mill for her (alternatively,…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/20 02:01 AM
2

good lord, you've given me flashbacks of my crazy ex-wife who thought I should cheat on her "for ideas". Is a possessive, jealousy-prone girl too much to ask?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/20 12:59 AM
1

Polygymy I really wanted to have just one sexual partner my whole life, so we’re out there. On the flip side of that, that’s ruined for me now after divorce so if a woman comes along who still wants me she’s got her work cut out for her feeding me positive affirmations about how what we have is special enough to negate that, assuming that kind of affirmation even works. Baggage is more of a problem than male nature. Coolidge effect Maybe, but if a pair-bond is formed by then he should never get …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/20 05:01 PM
6

Either approach us immediately, and don’t fake being a friend first In the “immediate” I don’t know if I like her yet. for an ONS, maybe, if that’s what I was in the market for, but an LTR? I’d need to gather more data, preferably as a friend. I’ve had a lot of opportunity windows close because of that. Even women who were interested initially but then the ‘friendship became too strong’. I’m not bothered by it anymore, but the way it plays out really does make the friendzone seem like a spin-off…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 01:45 AM
2

A man had his "LTR* phase. Now he wants to be a fuckboi. this can also a consequence of the hormones at the core of attachment, I think; dopamine which is behind sexual pleasure, and oxytocin/vasopressin is for social memory: matching that pleasure to a person. an LTR, especially one ending badly, takes the extreme novelty of virginity loss out of the pleasure ceiling for how good sex can be. If the first sexually charged LTR for a man turns out unsuitable, the sex from the second will be missin…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/20 04:50 PM
1

They’d have to be better than the ones that do come with the novelty of the first time, though. I mean, when the topic comes up people say to me “oh, a woman won’t mind not getting your first, she’ll forgive you; now go out there and put effort into securing a girl” To which all I can think is; by all rights, she would need to prove she can completely eclipse any intimacy I’ve experienced before she’d be worth an investment from me; If there’s a woman out there who still wants me I want the resu…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/20 06:53 PM
1

Even “experienced” people can have the novelty of learning about each other’s bodies together. If a woman manages to hit on that last novelty I’ve got left, such that it leaves my ex-wife in the dust and secures her as the most intimacy I’ve ever had, then I suppose I’d reluctantly wife her up and cry for a bit over not giving her my absolute first, but I’d feel bad about loving or being loved only as much as someone else already got at some point. I‘d much prefer to be a couple of virgins marry…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/20 06:05 PM
1

No, but I mean, that’s exactly the problem. More partners would make a guy more used to variety and more easily bored with the same woman. It’s no good to even try to marry at that point; only marry on a blank slate where there’s no chance to compare.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/20 05:47 PM
1

What about being bored of the same food, over and over?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/20 05:27 PM
1

Extra excitement upon discovering something for the first time, which isn’t present subsequent times? That’s exactly how it works, isn’t it? This is a problem for me though, because it means I can’t get that ‘extra’ from a new partner, and if the first woman wasn’t ultimately worth my commitment, the lack of that ‘extra’ disqualifies any other woman, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/20 05:16 PM
3

Dude sex is better when you aren’t young and inexperienced Virginity loss was a novelty with tingles and butterflies and it's been garbage since.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/20 04:21 PM
2

Men don't give away anything unreplenishable. IDK man, lost virginity followed by divorce has killed me outright; no way to get those tingles anymore, sex isn’t pleasurable enough to really trigger any feelings for a woman. plus, if we logic it out, commitment only works if virginity is sacred, anyway. If there are diminishing returns on feelings of attachment and pleasure from sex, then it’s only viable to stay with your first, because another is never going to give you enough pleasure to justi…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/20 12:58 PM
1

Video game consoles/PCs cost money one-time expense, versus consumable products like makeup good clothes cost money Through most of my child and teen years my parents couldn't buy me clothes when they wanted to, because that would require dragging me to a shop to try them in the fitting room and I couldn't be arsed when the clothes I had were perfectly fine. Starting to disintegrate a little, but 15 year old cosmic didn't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/20 03:04 AM
5

All I’m saying is people picture something much creepier when they hear “30 something man with 20 something woman” than is actually the case. Actually I myself would rather remarry into a decent age gap than a woman (shudder) my age
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/20 09:43 PM
1

Never heard of it
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/20 09:10 PM
6

I mean, as far as looks go, picture a man of thirty-something next to a 19 year old girl. If you’re anything like tonnes and tonnes of people I know, the man you’re picturing is somewhere in his fifties and the girl is in fact underage. I met a couple; the woman was 28 and the man looked to be about as old as she did, and she looked more like she was in the lower 20’s to begin with. He’s 48.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/20 09:08 PM
1

Speaking from experience? It's the oxytocin. I divorced a woman for cheating and the act of her taking my virginity from me has ruined my entire somatosensory system for other women; the interaction is garbage, If a woman kisses me, touches me or anything else that would have set off tingles pre-virginity I can't even feel it anymore; like I literally can't feel it, it's just the constant sensation of having a crust over my skin that blocks me from being touched. This is completely the fault of …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/20 10:39 AM
2

Edit: Then again, my dad is almost exactly 20 years older than my mom. (Don’t worry, it started at 50-30.) And I think the differences in their generational thinking, interests, etc has made life together pretty difficult. So as someone else said, the age difference is very important. I read a statistic that divorced men in particular have a high rate of remarriage to women with large age gaps, and personally as a guy in that exact predicament it feels like the impact it’s had on my thought proc…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/20 01:18 PM
1

This but if she does consider it special and did it with someone else that’s also a problem. I see sex as the holy grail of intimacy and after my ex-wife taking the first time away from me I simply have nothing left that can elevate another woman up into territory where no woman’s ever been before; and I’m sure as hell not commuting my life to a woman on the same level as someone I hate now. The evidence I’ve been forced to accept against my love being eternal makes to where it’s not worth attem…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/20 11:51 PM
1

Well on my end, where I’m taking sex as the holy grail of intimacy, having the ex-wife walk out left me with no such holy grail to experience with another woman, which means I’ve got no motivation to marry again since nothing at all can make another woman uniquely special; I need her to be the only one I have any memory of with relation to that high level of intimacy. “Better” Sex doesn’t matter to me because “best” can’t trump “first”; the first time experiencing something like that is just som…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/20 04:46 PM
8

I would if I could
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/20 02:37 AM
9

Actually, a girl nobody wants sounds pretty good, not gonna lie. Her body count is zero after all Yeah! For that exact reason! you get it
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/20 02:29 AM
2

If we’re defining love like we should be; oxytocin/vasopressin, because those hormones regulate partner preference i.e. unwillingness to cheat, what we’ve got to realize is that there are junkies who need a constant stimulation to counter their especially low impulse control. Multiple partners can really exasperate this. If your impulse control is much better, you may be able to take an oxytocin hit from your partner and spend the time until the next one masticating on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/20 07:33 PM
2

Protection's nothing to do with it; If he's leaving a trail of single mothers behind him everywhere he goes, then in all likelihood so will his son, and if that son is carrying her DNA, she gets a free ride on the 'shit-tonne of descendants' train.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/20 05:14 PM
6

The women can't build those robots, then? How very feminist of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/20 10:24 AM
1

I mean if we’re digging into fiction, I can think of a tonne of stuff she could do for me, or I could just choose a sorceress who can slip me literal love potions and bypass all that; in fact to get around the sadness of having someone perfect who I can’t give up my virginity to, having been married before that would certainly help. Beyond that though; We’ll go N=0, and faithful. Pair-bonds like a prairie vole. I guess I should also include the stipulation that she sees something in me, obviousl…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/20 09:43 PM
1

well, to speak to: Whenever you do something for yourself (going to the gym, eating healthy, dressing up better, taking hobbies), is the ultimate end goal in your head that hopefully women will find you more attractive as a result? going to the gym I wouldn’t do for myself, I don’t particularly care if I’m fit or not. eating healthy for myself. I live more comfortably when my diet is good. dressing up better I’d only ever do this for women, I’m not picky about how I’m dressed taking hobbies My h…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/20 01:31 AM
1

It’s hypocritical, but it’s not like women are applying these standards to men either. I’ve interacted with women to the tune of; “I like you” “No can do; I’m divorced and not in the market to try again.” “It’s ok, really. I still like you” “Look, I’m a weirdo to the point that nobody’s winning my love without taking my virginity, which I don’t have.” “Please?” TRP does have some hypocrite tendencies in taking these stances, but I don’t think that the process behind abandoning them should be fue…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/20 04:42 PM
0

But the hormones, brain chemistry is a big thing in women AND MEN and people don't seem to like to talk about it, especially since in a lot of cases it's too late. That’s my family, after divorcing having saved the first time for marriage. No first time to look forward to means no strong pair bond and an unhappy second marriage, should I enter into one. No marriage means no kids and no future, but the whole family fails to understand why I don’t want to do a second degree or quit my cushy, easy …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/20 04:03 PM
2

that would suggest that the women are readily swapping men to leech for resources, who they might not care about. Men choosing to remarry when they're on the wrong side of this incentive is less easy to explain.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/20 03:02 PM
1

For me it was about saving the strongest intimacy for someone who deserved to be put up on the resulting pedestal. Now I'm divorced and screwed out of any intimacy strong enough to secure someone as 'love of my life'. Not all sunshine and rainbows is right; I've inadvertently barred myself from any relationship whatsoever.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/20 02:38 PM
3

Sex brings with it the hormones responsible for bonding as a couple, and in the highest amounts of anything they could really do together. If either side has done it before then the uniqueness of the experience is gone and your long-term partner just doesn't feel like your 'true love' anymore. A couple more times and you start to become incapable of feeling romance as an emotion. Why would you? If 'maximum dosage' doesn't do it then what will? And if maximum dosage does do it, you only achieve w…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/20 02:05 PM
1

You all act like women are even considering you when they want to fuck/feel ready too. It has nothing to do with you & everything to do with how we feel about having sex. Yeah, my ex-wife refused to take me into account in any of her decisions, too. Treated me like property.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/20 01:17 PM
0

Some of the most stable marriages I know, the husband survived a succubus attack when they were young and stupid, and then learned from his experiences and was ready to settle down with a much younger virgin as he matured and learned what mattered. Maybe you wanna say that if they were so intent on a virgin they can’t have matured that much, but I’ll refrain from saying that because I have the examples to think that bridal virginity was the factor that allowed for these marriages to succeed and …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/20 12:58 PM
2

yeah and I'm saying women with money leave their husbands for being redundant. Not their dungeon slaves, though. Those are forever
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/20 09:31 PM
1

I mean, who doesn’t want a 22 year old millionaire who was too busy becoming successful to ever have a sex life to lock him in her basement as her own personal fuck toy? ...oh, Marriage? Nah, I’d worry my lack of resources compared to her would make her grow to resent me and walk away.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/20 09:26 PM
2

No, it depends who they LTR. There are quite a few situations where the physically attractive guys get ONS while that same girl marries a “stable” guy; Has money, N-count low to none; she’ll marry him, locking him into an agreement not to even try to get involved with other women, while she herself was involved with all these men. It’s an unequal partnership because as his only (or one of only a few) sexual partner, you’ve got a degree of specialness to his mind that he doesn’t feel is reciproca…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/20 09:14 PM
1

The operative question is "will this have been worth it--the memories, the experience, whatever it is-- if this ends up destructively collapsing" I like to think my ex-wife did me more favours by being an abusive psycho before deciding to walk away; imagine the state I’d be in if the next girl had to live up to the standards set by an actually good predecessor. This way it won’t be any harder than it needs to be to be happy with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/20 08:59 PM
2

this, basically. I’m in the unfortunate position of being divorced without kids, always had baby fever and a distaste for casual sex. Now that I haven’t got my chastity to share with one lucky woman, the baby fever is proving to be the stronger of the two. If the need and opportunity arise you can bet I’m knocking up some open relationship wife. It’s not casual sex, it’s family planning.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/20 02:11 PM
2

I’ve learned very recently just how effective lying to women is, but you really do get results. The only real issue is keeping it up for a while; if you’re telling the right lies to get sex as quickly as possible then it’s all well and good because by the time you’re exposed, mission accomplished, but if you want to continue to harvest affection from a woman for a while you do have to keep it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/20 01:54 PM
1

Sounds like you’re in a better position for it than a lot of people; casual sex is no easy feat for a lot of guys, and those less-than-attractive guy are usually the ones to end up with wives who aren’t attracted to them, hence why they push to open the relationship. I do think that a lot of factors go into it; I’ve heard tell of a number of such women bully the guy into an open relationship because she wants him around for resources but doesn’t want intimacy from him while there’s someone else …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/20 01:20 PM
1

Giving your arguments a read-through, is this swingers who go together to events in which each of them if hooking up with another couples' respective husband and wife? I'm personally on team monogamy, but even I know that an arrangement like this is not the same as an Open Marriage where each side has "permission" to go off and fuck other people, but in practice the wife goes off and does that and the husband receives no intimacy from really anybody, including now his wife and none of it is for …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/20 11:57 PM
1

Who said attractive? It’s frowned upon and sometimes even persecuted to fuck someone who’s drunk because they can’t meaningfully consent
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/20 06:37 PM
-1

Because they’re too impaired to consent
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/20 06:34 PM
1

I thought banging someone while intoxicated was already a big no. It inhibits the brain functions that we consider necessary for consent to be meaningfully given; it’s basically paedophilia.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/20 06:25 PM
2

If you're assuming that marriage is a prerequisite if a man wants to have a child, well...it's just not true. Most births in this generation are in fact out of wedlock. On the one hand, it takes a sneaky individual to base his family planning around out-of-wedlock “accidents” but on the other hand even my monogamy-worshipping ass is leaving that option on the table if worse comes to worse and the only women I’m meeting would rather have my child and go than stick around.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/20 12:33 PM
12

I think it comes down to inaccurate imagination. Everyone I (26) know who’s in their thirties could easily pass for 22 or even 18 if they lied about their age, but my knee-jerk reaction reading on this sub comments about ‘older guys in their thirties’ is to picture literally my late grandpa. Judging by the comments here I think that’s the crux of it
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/20 04:19 PM
1

If the reason for the sexlessness is lack of attraction then no. What I'd want out of a relationship is my own biological child, which necessitates sex, and if for some reason sex becomes an impossibility after that I still want perks that require her to be attracted; pseudo-sexual acts like kissing, back-rubs, maybe some kink stuff. The honest assessment of the situation is that stuff like that would probably do it for me better than PiV, but it's hardly in the spirit of the question to give my…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/20 11:25 AM
0

Stephanie sounds perfect but she'd probably resent me for having been married before and want a pure guy. I guess "spend the rest of your life with" implies getting a freebie. Plus my morals are in the right place.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/20 10:42 AM
5

How often do you see women divorcing because they’re “not happy” compared to this stereotype of a man who hates his wife with a passion but never lifts a finger in the direction of divorce. “Love” for a woman is purely an emotion, when you cease to be happy then you’re out of love. That same, or a similar feeling exists in men, but men’s “Love” is a code of conduct, a duty owed to a life partner. (some exceptions apply) Mens’ experience of the emotion serves as the startup payment to initiate th…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/20 03:33 AM
4

I think a big part of this problem is the inescapable reality of the hormonally-driven emotional attachment that’s tied to sexual intercourse; If marriage is a contract regulating sex, and people experience romance and sex out the same opening, then the two have to be tethered to eachother and simply opting out of the institution still leaves the problems caused by an unrealistic view of romance. I think it’s easier to fix that than it is to decouple romance and marriage; don’t get me wrong, the…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/20 08:48 PM
1

How many relationships have you had total vs how many were "Good Relationships"? Well, one marriage. I'd say "if it was good it wouldn't have ended" but you might interpret that as "fine while it lasted", which it wasn't. It was toxic, control freak, psychopath shit. How old are you? How long did/has the relationship last(ed)? I might as well start saying I'm 27 already. First meeting to clear signs of breakdown was 5 years. Is there a difference or consistency you've observed in what causes a r…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/20 10:33 AM
1

The degree of improvement would have to eclipse the novelty of the first plus any decrease in sensitivity, though. Which I suppose is doable, but with higher N it gets harder and harder, with the first hit being the most crippling. I think that really hits at the crux of the matter, as well; I want to avoid raising the bar for me any higher than its already been raised, and because I won’t be accumulating the experience and know-how to top a woman’s previous experience by making that choice, I n…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/20 04:14 PM
1

I mean, I was fine before all this went down. Plus, sex is the most amount of intimate I can manage, so the best I can do with someone else now is sex again, which isn’t enough for me to be satisfied with. I’m not going to bond with someone unless she’s more than anyone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/20 03:37 PM
1

that’s been my experience
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/20 03:07 PM
1

Maybe I’m projecting, but my experience confirms what I always believed about chastity for me, and I can only assume based on many women’s behaviour that the same goes for them; woman takes my virginity, get the feeling of ‘what we have is special’, big messy divorce, date other women, sex doesn’t feel special, nor does it bring out the same hormonal response, no other act is enough of a bonding experience to create ‘something special’ between myself and another woman, ergo no love. other people…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/20 02:18 PM
1

I'm saying I don't see the value in not having the 'illusion'. having feelings is all illusion.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/20 11:57 PM
1

Well from the other side of that coin, I'm a (divorced) guy with seemingly the same wiring, and my beef is that I can't fall as hard for a woman due to sex as I could if I could hand her my virginity. What that essentially means is that any woman to come along now will be, through no fault of her own, lacking. A woman can sit with me at the negotiating table until the cows come home and argue why being with her objectively improves my situation vis-a-vis my current state, but nobody's winning my…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/20 11:36 PM
1

it'd be subject to all the same kinds of lying as happens now. I don't think it's any bit plausible.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/20 10:55 PM
12

Basically the comparison would be which life is more fulfilling: the fuckboi who leave a trail of bastards who never knew their father (and vice versa), or the boring dude who might have raised a child that wasn't his in blood but still identifying him as the dad because of his presence as a father figure. so my options are ‘have a progeny or don’t have a progeny’? oh, decisions decisions
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/20 06:36 PM
4

race Yes. “Working on your appearance” for a man is a matter of moving from Africa to the west, the west to east Asia, East to Southeast Asia and Southeast Asia to Africa.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/20 02:22 PM
5

Bottom line is that women treat “the losers” they don’t want to marry better than the men they choose to father their children It’s the same guys in many cases, the entire purpose behind casual sex is to get pregnant with the spawn of some ‘loser’ and then weasel some poor provider into raising it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/20 01:21 PM
4

Gotta catch ‘em all
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/20 08:31 PM
1

Women are pretty visual in everyday life (fun fact women have a higher density of cones in their eyes, you guys literally see a wider range of colours than we do), but the claim that men are visual is as it relates to sex. Men really, really like to get a good view of the action during sex; seeing the look on her face, sex positions that offer a view of all the key parts of her body, etc. Contrast this with the handful of girls I used to help get off who were really into getting a good focus on …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/20 08:30 PM
0

If she’s fucked anyone at all, investment or no, then she’ll never love you like she loved them. One date for sex isn’t a terribly steep price point, and while yes, the fact that she’s done it with someone else spells trouble for any future relationship, that’s easily remedied by not entering into one. Personally, I wouldn’t even go so far as to fuck said woman for fear of STDs, but that’s beside the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/20 08:04 PM
5

Women on FDS and PPD talk about “effort” and how men do not put that much effort into dating women. But one thing women do not answer is why some men have to put in more effort than others. at this point the women say “one is only good for casual sex, the other is for a relationship and I don’t want him thinking he’s ‘not good enough’ for one by putting him into the ‘fuck zone’”... then the men say “well I don’t particularly want a relationship with girl who’s also had casual sex, so, fuck zone,…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/20 03:44 PM
2

What we are more likely to see is a shift away from monogamy towards polyamory, where both men and women share each other. Every time this happens today the end result is polyandry. I saw a story shared today of a wife bullying her husband into an open marriage only to freak out and try to convince him that she 'realized' it was a bad idea after he started seeing another woman. Y'know, as per the arrangement. Having said that though I feel like it supports your point of not wanting to share. Peo…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/20 05:47 PM
5

I think a lot of women think they're more appealing to a man after having sex with him. I think this because women have told me that they'd had sex with men in the hopes that after they did they'd be more appealing to him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/20 05:32 PM
7

I do remember reading and/or seeing something on discovery channel or Youtube, which outlined the general mating trends of polygynous monkey species: This is exactly what's observed in them; You get a handful of "Alpha" types who have harems, while the other males pair off monogamously with females who are not of interest to the alpha.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/20 05:25 PM
2

I don't think there's enough information there to be sure. I live in a place with a tiny, tiny population and I had been lucky to match one a month, never any bit attractive for most of the time I was using the app. Recently decided "OK this isn't serving it's function as a dating app, so I'll grab the passport feature, drop myself in the capital on one hand and fuck it, drop myself in Asia on the other hand, not to trawl for girls but just for language practice." Jeezy Creezy, the damn thing st…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/20 10:38 AM
1

Over half of all women (57.7 percent) reported having received or sent sexting messages with unsolicited dick pics being a thing, you have to wonder how many are on there because they're doing it on purpose.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/20 12:52 PM
23

Your ex wife is a fucking psychopath. Well at least someone agrees with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/20 09:53 AM
10

which isn't a huge problem if you think of "you'll run out of choices" in the same terms as "act quick if you want to just burn all the money you own; the firewood's running out!"
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/20 09:44 AM
29

Unsurprisingly, your partner will initiate sex more often if they enjoy it more. My ex-wife berated me for not initiating despite her constant turn-downs, saying shit like "You're supposed to not take 'no' for an answer, I'm a woman, of course I'm gonna say no" Later on this girl who later admitted that she'd been trying to get me to fuck her was going about it only in a very roundabout way; I mean, blatant enough that I could tell what she was hinting at, I just didn't want to fuck her because …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/20 09:37 AM
1

This is right up my alley. I’m here a lot, divorced guy, N1, pairbond-impared after just that So a couple of questions. Do you feel that once a woman or man gets to the point that there is no bond, just the mechanical thrill, can they ever be faithful? Well, If I ever marry again, the problem won’t be staying faithful; I’ve got no tendencies to suggest that I’d be even tempted to fuck around behind her back. The problem for me would be the feeling of attachment and bliss that’s not gonna be ther…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/20 01:17 AM
2

After I divorced my friends and family came out of the woodwork with examples of how what she’d been doing over the course of the relationship was clearly abuse, and it was. It’s understated in the extreme
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/20 07:22 PM
-6

What should happen to this donor? He should be thanked for giving me an idea for a reproductive strategy. How should the parents respond? however they like, I'm not the boss of them Sperm banks versus egg banks? they're both cool Requirements for donation? nah Is this some form of eugenics? it's freaking genius, is what it is Is lying about your genetic background worthy of punishment or criminal charges? I dunno, is lying about N count worthy of criminal charges?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/20 01:49 AM
1

The primary difference between men and women, from which all other differences stem, is that the women carry the child and the men produce the sperm. Almost everything downstream of that is sexual behaviour. We differ vastly in that area, and if we didn’t we wouldn’t need PPD, now would we?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 06:59 PM
3

in some cases. Not a common thing, by any means but Simping patrons can go a long way apparently
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 03:51 PM
7

In fairness I’ve known waitresses to make more than doctors with the tips some of them bring in. Waitressing was like the original Onlyfans with the kind of Simp money it brought in.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 01:46 PM
2

Isnt it kinda hypocritical to try to be the first of someone when they're not your first ? Not when the fact of the matter is that I took every measure I could to make sure I had only one lifetime partner and had someone else ruin it for me. To abandon my standards just because the ex-wife decided I wasn’t worthy of my own god-damn virginity would be to let her even further dictate my life. another question, Idk about the chemistry part of the "first" that you mentionned (seems dubious af to me,…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 01:43 PM
2

Being OK having sex and/or romance only with only one person possibly until your death Is what I wanted. With the specialness of the first time being what it is, and the apparent downregulation of the receptors for hormones like oxytocin and vasopressin after breaking a pair-bond making that feeling nigh unobtainable with someone else, I’d have preferred to stay with someone who I could appreciate as the woman who gave me that. Never having a long term relationship Technically the science says t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 01:06 PM
1

Should quantify that; unresolved horniness
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 12:27 PM
2

The way I see it, you want to be horny enough entering into a marriage that the sex is neurochemically causing you love and appreciate your spouse, but later on you want that same spouse to have burned out your libido enough that you’re not always wanting it, because horny is an unpleasant experience all things considered.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 01:52 AM
1

What is the point of a man or woman having feelings for another when he or she has ultimately had plenty of experiences and will continue to have more after the relationship has ended. you’re right on the ‘what’s the point’ angle but having feelings isn’t so much choice as it is brain chemistry. Why should a man or woman commit ? on the practical side, I want kids. On the emotional side, if I were a virgin doing it for the first time I’d be unable to help having feelings and then I’d want to com…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 01:37 AM
2

Male I'm not so sure most of this stuff is important enough to rank relative to eachother, but if I'm tiering them: Hugely Important: Compatibility At All Important: Intelligence, Personality, Facial attractiveness, Physical state Unimportant: Amount of friends, Status, Ambition, Height, Financial gain
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/20 10:09 AM
3

Actually, speaking from experience, I find a man can pull his own weight as much as he wants, and if the woman, even by her own volition, finds even mild success on her end, like a job with pay that isn't absolutely dwarfed by his, then she'll find him redundant. I see where you're coming from because I know women to be like that, and I disagree with it because as a man that's not the attitude my DNA encodes for. In the crumbling Roman empire I do believe the increasing independence of women pro…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 10:44 AM
1

But being a bit older, I know that when I’m ready to commit again all of the fun will be out of the way and I want the same for whoever I’m with. I'm gonna talk about myself, now. N-1, from an ex-marriage. I was perfectly OK associating sex with one and only one person, because it made that person special in a way that nobody else got to have. The experience of having the person you're with being the only source of 'fun' you've had makes it actually worth being with her. I'm ruined beyond the po…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 10:23 AM
1

They're just going to accept it bc they're essentially stuck too deep and don't want to cheat. as a man the only thing I'm missing out on after one divorce is the joy that comes from being with the only person you've ever slept with and not being able to compare/not knowing any better. I'd kill to be perfectly pure, oxytocin receptors fully functioning and getting attached to a woman because she's my one and only. So say for the sake of argument I now go through a hoe faze, and get 'good' at sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 09:51 AM
1

that’s what people say. and if he’s committed... what tips should I know, then?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 09:29 AM
1

eh, that sucks. She really stripped me of something important, and I hate her for it. It’s discouraging, not being able to get it back, ever seems like reason enough not to remarry sometimes. Sometimes it seems like enough reason to give up on having any future at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/20 01:11 AM
2

And the more people I've done it with, the less special it is. My husband's number is also low. I feel the same way but feel ruined after my 1 (who I was married to, and abandoned by). When and if I remarry I need that consummation to be the biggest deal, bigger than any time before it. Based on this low-n husband of yours, doable?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/20 11:23 PM
8

be able to have had their fun and be done with it I’m the fun. Me. Not Chad from 5 years ago, if she’s not having fun with me then I’m fucking someone who is instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/20 11:14 PM
2

cuddles Well, those were absent with the ex. Alright then, if someone up to par will have me I guess I’ll go for it
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/20 10:17 PM
2

It does suck, especially having no recourse to fix the situation. Pains me to think that I remarry and have that girl forever be my second. As a rule I’m trying, if I remarry, for it to be to someone who’s saving herself. The fact that women are that much less picky about marrying a virgin says it’s possible. I still feel terrible about missing out on making it a one-and-only experience though. A lifelong commitment to someone would be a lot more worthwhile if she’s got that memory attached to h…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/20 08:27 PM
4

I had every intention of having only one lifetime partner, and then she fucking abandoned me. Having already done it, I fear, will detract from the experience and the feelings of attachment that come with it, so.. Yes I’d absolutely date a girl like that and yes I’d wait. She’d actually understand what the problem is, unlike someone with religious reasons who just thinks “oh, you’ll be forgiven”. I’ll assume if the option of dating her is there that she doesn’t hold it against me or anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/20 07:50 PM
2

I’m upset enough to be divorced and not have the opportunity of only one lifetime partner (short of not remarrying). The problem I see with it is that sex generates dat oxytocin and dat dopamine, which causes attachment, but with my next partner, should I have one, I’ll get diminishing returns on the happy chemicals. It’s the same problem as with addiction; you end up needing more to get the same level of satisfaction. Now the benefit of one lifetime partner is being able to perpetually associat…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/20 05:17 PM
3

Based on what I know about women, probably because their pair-bonding ability is depleted really quickly so with the exception of the first couple boyfriends/partners they were never really attached to the guy to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/20 08:37 PM
1

I mean, technically I was married to a virgin the first time around, but it’s become more of a dealbreaker than it had been since in the absence of my own virginity one of us has to be the virgin of the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/20 04:57 PM
4

Nobody wins. Everybody loses
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/20 07:20 AM
1

that’s exactly why I’m posting here, looking for answers how to make it work again.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 05:35 PM
1

well to a mans’ mind the factors that go into a romance are like an extreme concentration of the factors that go into a friendship, which means that if a friendship gets close enough a guy will end up wanting more, most probably; women don’t think like that. The exception, of course; I’ve got a good female friend who’s got one or two quirks that for me are a romance dealbreaker, so I can just get as close to her as I like without wanting for anything. That friendship didn’t start out completely …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 05:29 PM
1

worked fine the first time. I just can’t get it to work again
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 05:03 PM
1

Inability to pair-bond is pretty tangible. I’ve got all the symptoms
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 04:48 PM
1

True, but I still can’t get my virginity back. This isn’t just some inconvenience, it falls under irreparable.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 03:48 PM
2

would that include divorcing someone who you told you valued making absolutely sure you only have one lifetime sexual partner as much as they do? ‘cause that’s what my ex-wife did and I’d certainly like to see her in prison for it, but so far I haven’t met very many people who are on board with punishing virginity deprivation. But with that said which gender do you think would get in trouble most for this if the law was enforced equality? men, I suppose, simply because there are more factors tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 03:16 PM
1

I’m not, I’m divorced, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 03:00 PM
1

literally the only thing you have to do is be taller then 5,7 and have a symmetrical body/ face. I dunno about that, I’m 6’2” and that doesn’t net me the time of day from most women.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 02:38 PM
1

lol might have but it's hard to make a fair assessment of the memories now because of hate-tinted glasses.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 12:39 PM
4

I mean if I knew that I might be able to fix it. I mean I haven't been able to really feel anything for any woman since; that doesn't bode well for pair-bonding. No tingles, nothing. What's likely the problem is that the most intimate act I'm capable of is just completely wasted now and I don't have anything to look forward to with a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 12:15 PM
1

Just about anything is called homophobic or transphobic these days, and frankly the attempts to shame people for turning down sex with someone that I’ve seen are just disgusting as well. I’m a bad one to ask though ‘cause I say balls-to-the-wall transphobic stuff all the time, at least by PC standards
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/20 01:01 AM
8

well, for me as a guy it was PiV that left me crippled and unable to form a pair-bond. Actually, forget pair-bond, I can’t even develop a crush anymore. I was also married to her though, if you think that makes a difference. point being for me as a man there was a nail in the coffin, and it wasn’t a few blowjobs
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/20 07:00 PM
2

Eh, ever since divorcing I’ve not been able to even begin that process of getting interested in someone. No butterflies whatsoever.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/20 02:44 PM
2

When I was married I didn't cheat because I didn't see the appeal or satisfaction of sex with anyone aside from my first and only. Now I hate her because evidently she didn't feel the same way and so a relationship or sex simply won't be fulfilling to me at anyway, but then neither is the single life. Something I really want to learn from these branch-swingers is whether it's really possible to be happy with someone if there aren't any 'first-time tingles'. How much better do they need to be to …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/20 12:24 PM
4

Is it only sex acts? Is a emotional connection cheating. Im trying to find out what people will allow their partner to do upto it being cheating. I mean, I wouldn’t strictly call emotional connection ’cheating’, but that’s just semantics; I’d still leave someone over it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/20 08:16 PM
2

I think we should just do what some cultures do; neither party in a marriage takes the others’ last name, but the kids take their last name from one of them it makes sense to name the child after the person who is certain to be the parent. There are no questions or surprises as to who the genetic mother is. Here’s an idea. The fathers last name should be assigned to the child only after a DNA test has proven its his. Then we can shame women who refuse
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/20 02:46 PM
1

The only time she would ever go out of her way to ask out a man would be if he was head and shoulders above any of the options she currently has. Why would you want a woman with options, knowing how much of a joke loyalty is to them?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/20 09:49 AM
6

Women not acting traditional is one thing, but it’s got less to do with ‘gender roles’ and more with negotiation, that is to say, traditional isn’t the way to put it because tradition is defined only by time: In the past it was certainly expected that men would be the chivalrous types, putting all the effort into making a woman happy, and women would refrain from premarital sex, maybe not have careers at all, just be passive and that. Nowadays the problem is that these women are breaking away fr…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/20 03:08 PM
1

What do you think causes transgenderism? Is it biological, “brain in the wrong body,” mental illness, societal pressure, or something else? It’s trendy and all their friends are doing it. That’s not to say their isn’t an inborn difference between them and most other people, it’s just that it takes the promotion of genderbending to lead them to think that the anomalies they have are a result of being born ‘transgender’ Is affirming transgenderism and medically transitioning beneficial to the pers…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/20 09:36 PM
1

I could definitely see it happening; I’d say ‘simp behaviour’ but if you’re saying these were attractive guys.. Yknow, if they were guys who were looking for low N (cause even that’s not as universal as we make it out to be) your complaints could have held some hint of suggestion that this was the first time you’ve had this happen, for an estimate of N-1. Them being Christian probably plays into it too. My values just happened to line up with Christian doctrine so I started looking there for wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 08:32 PM
3

I dunno what to say to that. Do you mean something about monogamy? If your claim is that high N doesn’t affect pair-bonding, and we’re defining pair bonding as ‘not being interested in other partners’ but you’re interested in having multiple partners, then you’re not pair-bonding and you’re disproving your own point.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 05:42 PM
5

I honestly don’t know what you’re trying to dismiss here, you’re not getting attached to anyone nor are you interested in monogamy, people point that out and your only response is “not true! See I don’t pair bond at all, so all you may-sayers claiming I can’t pair-bond at all are wrong, ‘cause I can’t.”
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 05:30 PM
5

“Pair-bonding” is a term that describes the behaviour of species such as prairie voles that mate for life. They become absolutely disinterested in other partners once they’ve had sex with their first mate and refuse to philander with others. If you’re fucking all kinds of people and open to fucking more that’s not what you’re doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 05:18 PM
4

If you’re not pair bonding you’re not pair bonding. However much fun you’re having is not something off which to base a decision concerning Whether you can pair bond.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 05:05 PM
2

I mean, if you can define ‘bonding’ in a way that allows for ‘not wanting to be tied down’ and being perfectly capable of leaving the guy for someone else, but that’s not what we here are on about.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 04:58 PM
5

I think this is the crux of it; anytime I hear a woman say she’s perfectly capable of ‘bonding’ it’s all about how she hopped between sixteen guys and was ‘head over heels‘ for all of them. It’s all well and good in the short term but then why’d she bounce? I doubt she’s old enough that these were long-lasting relationships, and she had a good 16 of them. Reminds me of a friend of my brother who would get one cigarette’s worth of smoke out of a whole pack in one sitting because ‘only the first 3…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 04:55 PM
2

I had a study that says that for men one partners’ worth of damage is about the same as fifty. That leaves women with virgin guys as their only good option.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/20 03:56 PM
6

Virginity is hugely a safety concern ("insecurity" seems to be a huge buzzword, but I don't think anyone should feel bad about being insecure, they're just using the word to attack us.) Let's take a look at common reasons for valuing virginity; 1.) high sociosexuality predicting infidelity and pregnancy by someone else: Big name celebrities are out fucking groupies and fathering children who they'll never see or hear from again; if the wife is coming home pregnant with someone else's child, so w…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/20 01:27 PM
2

Reminds me of a discussion I had with a friend a week or two ago. The context, we’d just binge watched some sci-fi show: ‘who would want to marry a girl with no emotions? like she can’t actually love you’ ‘yeah but she also can’t just stop loving you out of nowhere for no reason whatsoever. Could be a point in her favour depending what counts as ‘emotion’.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/20 07:34 PM
1

Online dating is different; there’s expectation and social contract. I’m saying that while women often disqualify their friends from their pool of potential romantic interests, a man isn’t so opposed to dating out of his existing pool of friends. Therefore it’s viable for a woman to establish companionship with the guy she’s interested in order to improve her chances.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/20 08:09 PM
1

I think that's the gist of what I'm getting at, though I'm saying women aren't as attracted to their friends, which ends in friendzoning; but on the flip side this works wonders on men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/20 12:17 AM
1

Men don't really friendzone, though. That's largely women.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 11:52 PM
1

is this the same high value male who won’t agree to a relationship to begin with when he can just fuck a new girl every day of the week? I think any guy, high value or otherwise who’s still capable of being convinced to commit would start an LTR with an established friend who he’s attracted to over someone he met not long ago and hasn’t had a connection with because they haven’t gotten acquainted beyond sex. Committing to someone because the sex has been good is more of an investment than a HVM …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 05:25 PM
2

that’s the thing though; friends aren’t a heavy investment relative to the value they provide; it’s a chance for her to prove herself without an illicit social contract demanding his investment and providing him incentive to shed her as quickly as possible. She doesn’t bar him from pursuing sex, because there’s no social contract saying he can’t, but at the same time she can make her case for an LTR when she says ‘we’ve established companionship already, if we add sex to that we’re in business f…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 02:50 PM
1

if we take an LTR as ‘sex+companionship’, and accept that some guys just want sex, then either providing it early or having a formal date that establishes in no uncertain terms that he’s ‘waiting’ for it allows for him to exploit the arrangement for sex (or bounce on it) before there’s been time to establish companionship. By proving herself a good companion, a woman can establish a better argument as to why a guy should LTR her, instead of pumping and dumping. “Hey I gave you sex now give me a …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 02:42 PM
2

I mean, she can escalate whenever she wants, but if he’s only looking for sex and she puts out, he’s done with her. By trying to escalate the relationship from friendship, the ‘companion’ element of an LTR is accounted for first, which strengthens the girls’ argument as to why the guy should LTR her instead of pumping and dumping; “we’ve already established that we enjoy eachothers’ company, and ‘now I’ve fallen for you’”. or some bullshit. Order of operations.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 02:31 PM
2

I’m not into hooking up either. I’m mostly speaking from that perspective, though expanding on it to say that basically any woman can benefit from arguing to the guy she likes “hey you should date me because we’re already good friends so I’ve proven that you enjoy my company already.“ any guy would consider that an air-tight argument. The same argument on a woman gets a response like ‘we can’t date, we’re such good friends I don’t wanna spoil that.’
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 02:23 PM
5

Chad will go off and do whatever he wants regardless of this girls’ input. I’m saying that if she wants an LTR then being vagina #76 doesn’t secure that for her, and dating the guy without granting access (so that he is, in theory, stuck waiting around unless he drops her) is an even worse proposal. Meanwhile if she’s just a friend, and a good one at that, then in making the upgrade to an LTR she’s got more of a leg to stand on arguing her case; a scenario where she doesn’t is one in which locki…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 01:51 PM
3

dating consistently for a long while until you vet him before sex would be ‘making him wait’. I’m saying vet in secrecy so that he doesn’t drop you for having him wait, while at the same time building rapport of your own.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 01:34 PM
1

admittedly, what I’m saying isn’t a scenario where the man has to work, per se. It’s one where the woman is hiding her intentions until she builds rapport, and then pounces on him like she would have early on (because he’s Chad or something, idk.) point being she’s not so much making him wait as she is establishing herself as an LTR candidate before running the risk of being pumped and dumped and without demanding that he wait around or work for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 01:31 PM
3

I mean, a guy who just wants to fuck is quite well-serviced by the common model of having a date on day 1. The rapport a woman builds via friendship would definitely make her a better candidate for LTR
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 01:21 PM
1

I’m not sure if that’s a dismissal of LTRs altogether or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 12:42 PM
2

I think ‘forced’ is a good way to put it; of course OLD would be like that because, well, it’s OLD. At the same time though the cases in which a platonic friendship is able to elevate to an LTR could make ‘targeted’ dating seem forced by comparison, whether or not that happens all that much in real life is a bit ambiguous because like I said, a lot of women now are advertised the ‘ONS-LTR’ pathway, but how often in fiction do you see the protagonist marrying a childhood friend? It’s not somethin…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 12:41 PM
2

I think men are geared toward valuing companionship and that sense of being a ‘team’ to the point of requiring it in a long-term sexual relationship. Dating with that goal in mind from the get-go because you find someone attractive is more of a woman thing. Women go for that straight away, they don’t try for ‘friends first’ and they therefore don’t make friends with guys they’re attracted to; if they’re attracted they shoot their shot almost immediately. We’ve all heard the complaints from women…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/20 11:33 PM
1

Y'know, if not for womens' behaviour, Earth might actually be a planet worth living on.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/20 12:00 PM
0

As a divorced guy who was waiting before that marriage, I've got to agree; trying to even date without the inexperience, simple things like being attracted to new women, even good-looking ones, is a conscious effort chore, if it's even achievable at all. whatever chemical mumbo-jumbo women do to their partners to keep them from chasing other girls I figure must be overstaying its' welcome or something. It's to the point now that I'm convinced that unless I could somehow get my virginity back tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/20 10:20 AM
1

I’d elaborate on why you’re spot-on but you’ve covered it all. Spot-on.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/20 07:53 AM
2

I think there’s a huge appeal to having just the one partner, one lifetime partner even, in that if you only know that one partner you can direct all of your pair-bonding resources toward her, which could help satisfaction in her. It’s for that reason I so dislike having to have an N of 1 while continuing a post-divorce partner search, it’s a stain on my efforts. I can see the appeal of trading those benefits in for the benefits of a harem in the traditional ‘king with a handful of faithful wive…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/20 07:27 AM
1

On the flip side, a divorce put me at N 1 and I seriously want to swan dive off a building over it. First time is for the wife; if I don’t have it to give then I can’t date anymore. Pairbonding is impossible now
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/20 11:19 PM
1

Men also have an inherent revulsion to being sodomized, or cheated on, and guess what? These fetishes capitalize on metastrophilia. It's through metastrophilia that people get to insanities like snuff and scat. Every time you feel pleasure while masturbating, you associate pleasure with what you find negative and that association branches out. From what I remember reading on the topic, most pornography users, even avid ones, tend to avoid stuff that they find distasteful. If you’re consistently …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/20 06:13 PM
1

because a lot of people don't think that far ahead and you don't want to be an accomplice to that fact
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/20 06:30 PM
1

I'm not saying lawsuits, I'm saying if you change your mind, there's no way to rectify the situation. If I'm employing something like abstinence or condoms as my method of birth control and change my mind, doing so is free and easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/20 06:05 PM
3

very much so. If you change your mind later you're screwed. There are like, 101 other ways not to have kids that are perfectly reversible, why intentionally damage your body?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/20 03:35 PM
0

I think tube-tying should be a lengthy process; if and when someone changes their mind, it’s not particularly reversible, compared to other birth-control methods; physical barriers, pharmaceuticals, abstinence even. I guess it’s a little hypocritical since I don’t believe in divorce to say that we should favour methods that don’t screw you over if you change your mind, but that’s just me believing that the consequences of sex aren’t reversible and that that’s out of human control. I don’t think …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/20 02:37 PM
1

supposedly the immunoreactive neurons that go into deleting the former, now-unviable pair bond end up staying in the brain, which dampens a future bond. I haven't seen the research, if it exists, to know what kind of effort you'd put into removing them. Right now I'm working on that, in addition to maybe hiding a divorce in order to attract a woman who hates divorce as much as I do. I'm continuing to pursue low-to-no N, I'm having enough trouble recovering, if that's even possible; women demonst…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/20 11:50 AM
1

I mean, there’s an argument to be had for getting one or two ONS out of the way over marrying someone who then has to share the spotlight with exactly one other girl. The jealousy, amirite
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/20 06:09 PM
8

‘cause it’s so much better to appreciate intimacy with someone as your one and only than to treat a bunch of them like sex objects.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/20 01:43 PM
1

well on the flip side of that how great would it be if someone leaves you and you retroactively never loved them. A second love just isn't special like a first
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 07:40 PM
2

I wish I could ask more women who are bothered; I complain non-stop about wanting my virginity back to give to someone who deserves it (and pair-bond better) in search of solutions but it all falls on deaf ears saying “you’ll meet someone who doesn’t care, most women don’t” Not if there are women out there who do realize how important this is to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 06:59 PM
3

I mean, it works as an analogy because what this hypothetical girl is saying this hypothetical guy does for these women induces a comparable amount of cringe as a woman offering sex to a guy and then going off and marrying someone who can raise the baby for her(in the case of single moms, cause trust me single moms are quite common in OLD and they’re there saying they’re a catch) or who they’re otherwise not valuing for sex (the ONS she valued only for sex, a man would see that as a purer form o…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 05:51 PM
5

Men don’t like a sexual past, women don’t seem to be as bothered. It’s two groups of people confusing the hell out of eachother going “why aren’t you like me?”
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 05:42 PM
1

That’s absolutely true, so I guess I’m not disagreeing at all, though after my last relationship the promise of less sex in exchange for any kissing whatsoever is... Starfishing doesn’t cut it
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 05:22 PM
1

Your logic checks out, though I feel like I should throw in; and this marginally relates to N count and why I think that the fact mine is 1 instead of zero is a tragedy; I like intimacy, a lot. I’d go so far as to define love as the feeling that comes from intimacy, which motivates wanting exclusivity. Now, if I were just a playboy or something getting sex from whoever then that association of ‘this is the one I get intimacy from’ is gone and I don’t end up loving really anyone. If I get into a …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 05:05 PM
1

I'll semi-admit to intimacy being the primary and perhaps even only utility men get out of women, but I think in my case at least you'd be a little off; if you just want to stimulate ur dick, there's porn, but I can't kiss myself, or cuddle alone, or nibble my own ear.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 03:42 PM
1

If this were purely about going against their evolutionary drive, they'd be abstinent, too. They decide they don't want kids because there was never a need for evolutionary pressure to steer them toward wanting kids. It only had to drive them to fuck, and then drive them to take care of the kids once they successfully popped out. A better example would be those god-fearing abstinent Christians who've suppressed wanting to fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 09:55 AM
1

I'm 26, N=1. I'd rather be at 0. Any higher is incapable of pair-bonding. I waited until marriage to get involved but the ex-wife couldn't respect that and she was sneaking around. She took that 0 from me and I hate her. Pair-bonding just isn't possible for me anymore, so I don't get the marriage that I had wanted, or kids. She's basically destroyed my life in its' entirety. N count is no laughing matter. I'm experiencing first-hand what it does to pair-bonding. Even if I could still have feelin…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/20 09:42 AM
2

women initiate divorce far more often than men, so simply correlating N and divorce rate without accounting for the initiator gives us an incomplete picture, but one which is more complete on the female side.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/20 09:48 PM
1

I’d like to see that reading; I’m (assuming that I’m) in a tight spot for pair-bonding and I’ve been trying to understand how a possible fail-safe could work for me
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/20 09:44 PM
2

“Bêta” as it applies to dating is investing in a woman without getting what you want from her, i.e. her best. In the context of acting, is he investing more than he gets back if he’s doing what he wants to do and staying out of hosting? sounds like he’s got a preference and goes for it. not beta
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/20 08:15 PM
1

If a woman is open about what she looks like without makeup is it okay? And people who change DRASTICALLY are really honestly rare, and it’s quite obvious in real life, so are you guys only talking about the minimal percentage of women who wear makeup-artist level face morphing makeup? But if that’s the case I don’t think it would be such a frequent topic. The majority of my personal objection to makeup is basically this, yeah. A lot of the language I hear from women (who stress about ‘needing’ …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/20 08:09 PM
2

I mean, there’s a small element of petiteness being good-looking, but most of it is anxiety because women keep calling us ‘useless’ or ‘not good enough’ if we’re not smarter/stronger/bigger than them. Competent women can be quite attractive in their own right, in theory, but in practice they end up being the type that ‘don’t need no man’ and that sets off all kinds of red flags where we just know that we’re not getting what we want out of a hypothetical LTR with her. Doesn’t stop us from fantasi…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/20 07:48 PM
4

Fluid exchange is another concern factoring into n-count, we don’t know how long a partners’ fluids stay there when they get into the body. I certainly wouldn’t want to remarry when I’m already “stained” with someone else’s chemical footprint. Plus, as far as pair-bonding goes theres research out there to explain how that works, and basically a second pair-bond in males just doesn’t end up reaching its’ full potential vis-a-vis the first.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/20 02:56 PM
4

I wanted to marry my first and she still cheated and took from me 5 years of my life, and the experience of a first time, probably also contaminated me with her genetic material. I haven’t been happy since. Only by being my first can a woman be good enough for me and she ruined it. I want my 0 back. So, I lose either way.??? I kinda understand why women are rejecting marriage so drastically now. Jesus Christ. Sounds dystopian now that I wrote this out. Holy shit. I feel the same way, and I’ve be…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/20 02:07 PM
4

I’ve always conceptualized “starter wives” as women who (quite foolishly) walk away after getting the ‘motivation ball’ rolling because they’re not ‘building you up’ as quickly as they’d hoped; they leave you upset and not really able to focus on much outside work and of building yourself up which sets the stage for, almost accidentally, attracting what I’ve been calling a ‘healer wife’/‘cleric’ That’s the scenario that I’ve seen a few times now.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 08:07 PM
1

I Often see the extremes being discussed here, aka virgins are the best LTR material OR women with 100+ n count will be cat ladies and die alone. But what is the appropriate, rational number for you that doesn’t fall into extremes? I mean, if you held a gun to my head, then failing 0, there’s a few factors to account for. First of all, I’d be worried about paternity and couldn’t trust that exchange of bodily fluids wouldn’t have some adverse effect; so, with the stipulation that any possibility …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 06:20 PM
3

Who's more used? A woman who has been passionately madly in love with 3 guys before you but only slept with 4, or woman who has slept with 30 guys but you're her first love? The former already hit the height of attachment and without any way to top it I’ll never be the world to her. The later dissociates love and intimacy and isn’t generating that oxytocin response from sex. My personal excuse as to why I’m not compatible with that is; y’know that quiz online that pops out someone’s “love langua…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 05:08 PM
1

definitely agree there. I’m not too worried about how well a girl fucks when given enough time she could get good with just the one partner. My N of just one is something I’m not even happy about because I reckon the value of ones’ only partner trumps the value of being their best by virtue of how far ahead of other people it puts you. I’d sooner be a new model than in my current condition, and I’d sooner pick that kind of woman, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 04:41 PM
1

on the “had better” front (and I guess on the “worn out” front) I’ve got a story, too. So post divorce I met this (high N) girl, she did try for sex but I ended up kind of friend-zoning her; still a good friend though. of course, en route to trying for sex she was pushing for the ‘lead-up’; make-outs one day, then half-naked cuddling, general build-up stuff. One huge factor as to why I lost interest was that despite her apparent enthusiasm, stuff that she’d do and get me to do back to her just d…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 04:24 PM
1

both before I married (was abstinent, however) and after divorcing, not many women would even give me the time of day, but the ones that did were bringing up sex within hours of a first outing together. of these, most were low N, though one was N in the double digits. my takeaway from that fact? A woman agreeing to a date and not rushing to bed may well just be abstinent, but if she’s not then that’s awfully suspicious. If I can’t get romantic attention that isn’t also sexual with my below-avera…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 04:33 AM
4

A woman shouldn’t do shit unless you turn her on. That's 100% fair but I wouldn't LTR a woman I can't turn on. Yes, even if it's my fault.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 02:46 AM
4

What is your body count? 1 Gender/Age? Male/26 Number of past LTR and ONS? Not many. One marriage, but it's not still in effect. Introvert/Extravert? (No ambivert answers, if you feel like you’re ambivert just choose what is more likely to be truth) Mostly Introvert Your level of satisfaction with your history from 0 to 10 and elaborate why? (ex: N count - 15, level of satisfaction - 5. I wish I did more/less) 0, I really wanted to save that first time for a permanent relationship, get a "love h…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/20 02:43 AM
-1

Dolphins use gay sex to bond with potential hunting buddies, and then they go out and, ahem, rape females together. I wonder what evolutionary pressure lead to gay/bisexual humans..... could give us an answer
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/20 11:29 PM
1

I sure hope it's not a progress indicator; young, abstinent me may not have had a lot of takers, but the ones he did have would try to negotiate whether sex could be on the table within days, sometimes hours of chit-chatting about how shitty public transport is around here. With OLD it's just match, message, no response. damn, where'd my boyish charm go? When I had it I was coming up with every which excuse to be miserable, but knowing what I know now I'm remembering those same things I was mise…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/20 11:23 PM
3

I'm hovering somewhere in the range of 6'2 last I checked. No real physical bulk at all; I gained a bunch of belly fat last year that I haven't gotten rid of yet but I'm not big around, by any stretch; muscle or fat. I was trying to find an example of feminine and muscular at the same time; I remembered seeing a youtube video where a woman was showing off the results of a workout routine geared toward mimicking the body type of a videogame protagonist by the name of "Edelgard", but I can only fi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/20 07:46 PM
6

outside of visible muscle not being all that attractive to me, I haven't got any values-based aversions. Plus to be stronger than me wouldn't really require her to be visibly jacked to begin with, I don't think. taller than me is fine, too. Trying to picture what that would look like; I'm one of the tallest people I know, at least in person.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/20 07:18 PM
2

There’s always the possibility that I wasn’t really. I certainly wasn’t at any point getting up-to-standard affection from her, that’s for sure. Sex, though... As far as things like hormone levels are concerned, sex is gonna set a ceiling for how attached I can be to someone. I can’t just find someone and bond deeper by being more intimate. Nowhere to go
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/20 12:36 AM
2

lol I basically came here to see If I could figure out what I might be able to do about the pair bonding issue since N-count is such a hot topic here. I’ve always wanted kids, which is what makes the current situation so difficult
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/20 12:01 AM
1

Yeah. Blood related, preferably
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 11:52 PM
1

None, I still need a couple
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 11:47 PM
2

lol I feel like I’m just gonna have to, for the kids. Oh how in my favour it’d be to just be claimed, or taken, or auctioned off to the highest bidder or something. Put into a situation where I’ve just got to roll with it and my feelings don’t matter
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 11:35 PM
3

I mean women don't send angry threats when they don't get what they want. ...could I, meet these women, who don’t?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 11:07 PM
1

I mean a lot of people take my concerns to mean I’m still pining but, not so; it’s just that if discovering all that for the first time wasn’t impactful enough to give me a bullet-proof attachment, I can only expect the second run to be less so.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 10:56 PM
2

Sounds like a good way to fall out of love quickly. like knowing how a magic trick is done, or having heard that joke before.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 10:40 PM
2

AFAIK the women in said story were low ns and even virgins across the board. Hmm, I need to talk to more people about this kind of thing, in hindsight it seems like an AFBB case study
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 10:33 PM
1

The glue gives you an excuse to add something to the object that increases its value. If I had an analog to that wouldn’t it be something I could do to bring up the quality of a potential marriage? Wish I knew what that was
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 10:28 PM
2

The gold glue? Where’s this going, I wonder
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 09:53 PM
3

Did I hear “embarrassing story time?” So my ex-wife; cold, heartless thing, had an approach to sex that was basically ‘Can’t handle anything but jackhammering’: refused to kiss, refused to let me touch her, at all, for reasons I later found out were something to do with fake resistance, or something? Anyway, not important. Point is I hate her guts and she did everything you might see someone do if they were told that orgasm literally kills you. Now, Prior to that, it was no sex before marriage f…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 09:35 PM
1

When you’re a virgin discovering sex and intimacy for the first time, the value that a woman provides for your life is an introduction to that comfort as source of pleasure; the ‘tingles’ and the ‘butterflies’. Once you’re ‘impure’ You’re used to it and another partner just doesn’t hit the same way. If it’s analogy I’m providing: there’s not actually any reward in defeating the tiger, I tried to play nice with the tiger and the bastard bit me, but whether he but me or not isn’t the problem, the …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 04:19 PM
4

Culture is one thing, but it would have shifted anyway and the interesting bits will always be preserved by enthusiasts because people love history. Haplogroups are another matter; like when Christianity displaced Roman religion, two things happened; one was that the Roman haplogroup still survived, and the other was that Ancient Rome became really cool. I quite like having multiple ethnicities hanging out together, I don’t want one drowning all the others out.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 03:07 PM
2

Well I’ve definitely been taking religion seriously because it agrees with things that are obvious to me and don’t seem so obvious to other people. Namely the decline that you’d get in relationship quality by having more than one partner. If I’m spending the rest of my life with a woman it should be meaningful; I can’t not discover intimacy for the first time when I’ve still got memories of when I did with someone else. I don’t want the memories, I don’t want whatever bull crap genetic material …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 12:07 AM
2

doesn’t seem like something that’ll ever go away, though. I could wait any amount of time into the future, still won’t make me a blank slate, or acceptable to a woman who wants a blank slate
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 09:25 PM
2

my main concern is losing a chance at a relationship with someone who can be the only. first one obviously got to have that, and I had to experience that, but remarry and that experience isn’t with her. the two big obstacles coming from that are attachment and a way to still have kids of my own considering not being able to form a strong enough attachment to sustain a marriage. I guess as well that finding a religious girl who’s waiting and wouldn’t let a marriage crumble is an issue as well sin…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 08:16 PM
2

the panic’s definitely been coming back lately, but sleep hasn’t been an issue. support is hard to come by because nobody really knows what, if anything, can actually be done about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 06:47 PM
2

I would have been about 20 or 21 at the time. 20 and 19, iirc? I'm 26 now, so that's an unacceptably large chunk of my youth to just go missing.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 05:32 PM
1

First time took the ability to pair-bond right out of me. If I’d been ‘experimenting’ that would have happened ages earlier.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 05:05 PM
2

yeah, absolute waste of a marriage and my twenties.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 01:39 PM
2

Most people prefer this to arranged marriages, believe it or not. Also, divorce exists, thankfully Bit of a hot take, but as a divorced guy who may well miss out on a perfectly good opportunity to form a connection with someone due to romance no longer being fresh and new, I think I deserve the right to, instead of going out looking, to just be auctioned off to the highest bidder. And no, there's no /s here.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 10:42 AM
2

since about 2014 up until the late spring of 2019. Basically a long-ass time to have wasted and nothing to show for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 10:33 AM
2

In addition to this, trans women somewhat more recently have been more encouraged and promoted as being okay As far as acceptance goes, a good deal of the trans women I know make no changes whatsoever to their lifestyle outside of going by "she", or crossdressing. They also appear to date bisexually and when they're with dudes they're basically indistinguishable from gay men. and even fetishized and desired more than cis women for a lot of men. Otherwise straight men with a fetish that they'd be…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 10:30 AM
0

If a man is a decent lover And what comes out of the practice you'd need for that? Habituation, weakened response. Sex is less pleasurable because you're used to it, you meet some girl, really hit it off, get intimate and BOOM; tingle immunity. You think "oh well maybe she's not the one" and drag your unfeeling ass off to go be dissatisfied somewhere else.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/20 10:18 PM
3

I still don't get the experience of a first time with a one-and-only. What I'd fully expect from a marriage in this state is a carrot-and-stick scenario where there's not enough intimacy in the world to erase missing out on having her as my only.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/20 08:41 PM
5

Not that they would want you if you're not a virgin too. Having done everything right and saved it for marriage, and then having fallen victim to infidelity and my virgin marriage taken away from me; it turns out women are in control of that too. They can just dictate to you that you don't get to have the pure marriage you were after because they can't respect your right to a pure, lifelong marriage. Like where do I sign up to just die already? there's nothing for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/20 08:26 PM
1

A man who's already fucked one woman and felt something is already spent and won't bond with the next one. Source: I'm a man who's already spent and can't bond.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/20 02:33 PM
1

I divorced due to infidelity. That’s an N of one (just one) and of course one LTR. She couldn’t respect me. It’s the sex that triggers pair-bonding, on a neuro chemical level. It’s the most amount of intimacy two people can share; the most in love I could possibly be would have been the direct result of being with the one and only person I’d ever had sex with. That’s my ceiling. Considering the kind of trash my ex-wife turned out to be that’s a pretty low ceiling. intimacy just hasn’t been pleas…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/20 10:29 AM
17

"How 'bout I do, anyway?" -that judge
/r/PussyPass18/07/20 10:23 PM
1

Why commit when you can just fuck? even with my wanting commitment I was sure not to have sex before marriage specifically because commitment is such a steep price to pay for anything but the full-scale oxytocin high you get the first time, and only the first time, because after that habituation brings the strength of your response down a notch. Now I’m divorced and struggling to justify committing to someone else despite really missing commitment. On the one hand, she’d have to be a first-timer…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/20 07:04 PM
1

and those religious women often want virgin men, too. Every time I've complained to religious women who were willing to listen about my predicament, it's just been an absolute miscommunication clusterfuck: "I'm not happy because I'm already divorced and I don't feel that I could be happy in a remarriage since the oh-so-special experience of giving up my virginity will not have been with the wife." "Well your morals favour waiting until marriage, so a woman with the same convictions would still a…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/20 12:46 PM
1

who?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/20 09:27 AM
2

how hot was she? starfish behaviour, even if looks were up there. even so, people with even one previous partner still have this steep decline in marital satisfaction. Plus since the Ex-wife was virgin at marriage I’m dealing with a bit of a high bar: getting someone who’s saving herself as a divorcee? Even if she was terrible settling for less than that is still a downgrade. I don’t intend put effort into a downgrade.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/20 11:48 PM
4

I can’t even stand non-virginity for myself. It’s bad enough to have lost a good 5-6 years of my life to a marriage gone nowhere, but after that first time there’s just no discovering it for the first time anymore, no experience to be had with any woman that can contribute more to making her special than being the first. I don’t know how I’m expected to pairbond when the most oxytocin I’ll ever release is already spent on someone who’s now garbage to me, not unless some woman is planning to drug…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/20 09:57 PM
1

Then found a partner that was thirsty for ME, and I thought that was really hot. I basically need a woman chasing me before I even humour the idea of a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/20 11:40 PM
4

No worries, I covered that base when I was deeply wronged and raged so hard that an in-progress bioweapon escaped from a Wuhan lab
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/20 10:24 PM
1

I waited until marriage to do it. Had her get bored of me, as women are oft to do, and now I'm left childless with no choice but to fuck somebody else, against my better interests, if I ever want children. I think as far as "justified" goes, that's a pretty goo justification. It's just flat out not my fault that this happened. A woman who saved herself certainly wouldn't be subject to the same fate involuntarily.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/20 12:13 PM
1

I’m absolutely disgusted with myself for falling victim to divorce. There’s nothing more intimate than sex, so now that I’ve had my first taste of that taken away from me I can’t be more intimate with someone else; which means I can’t be more in love. Those butterflies when it’s a brand-new experience, nobody can ever be the one who gave me those ever again, and even if they could, they still wouldn’t be the only one. Once a man gets that oxytocin rush from the first time and the receptors start…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 08:03 PM
11

Any man would much rather his wife hit him than cheat. But for a woman I'd speculate the other way around. That's just a guess though.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/20 01:28 AM
1

Not with the state of dating as it stands. If I’ve got a close friendship developed with someone, We can be reasonably vulnerable with eachother and just generally make a team effort to support and encourage eachother with lifes’ frustrations. And, I’ve got enough reason to believe that such a trend would continue if a relationship ever managed to grow out of a friendship. Relationships in reality, however, and this is courtesy of women’s expectations, start and end with an effort to impress. Wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/20 12:06 AM
1

I have trouble from personal experience accepting that there’s some gold standard of looks. I do, on occasion, get pursued by women purely on the basis of looks, without having to do anything, but not overly frequently. If looks were up to some gold standard, you would think that it’d be either that I’d persistently get approached or I wouldn’t. Instead it’s just on occasion.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/20 07:43 PM
-1

leaves a sense that emotional intimacy is the least attractive thing to a woman, and the last thing you should want or ever trust her with. Learned this the hard way. Got married, got screwed out of hard-protected chastity (OK not that hard to protect, but whatever). Emotional intimacy would be great if I thought that I could still have it, but with "first time" being, by definition, a peculiarity, that would mean committing to a woman whose significance to be cannot be maxed out. That women wan…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/20 10:42 AM
1

there were some studies in Prairie voles that came to this sort of conclusion. After losing the first partner, male voles would be easily convinced to pair with a different female, albeit he’d spend less time with her, perhaps not being completely satisfied since she’s not his one-and-only. Meanwhile no amount of time after losing a first partner could convince a female to take another long-term mate. at most she’d let one fuck her before chasing him off growling and hissing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/20 10:16 PM
1

I want that info. When am I due to be virgin again...
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/20 10:11 PM
3

26M one, an ex wife. It’s one too many, as far as I’m concerned. There’s no substitute for discovering it for the first time and I want to associate that with someone who I’ll actually be spending my life with so that she gets that status to make her, y’know, worth spending my life with. I want it back, really bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/20 09:55 PM
11

If you’re having orgasms with everyone, how do you develop feelings for one particular person though?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/20 02:13 PM
1

Sex at all. If a man is going to offer commitment and provide for a wife, he needs to of course get some value back. The sentimental value of discovering sex for the first time, plus the ability to stand out in her mind as the only person to share in that with her, is a pretty good deal. If he's already fucked someone else before and the magic is gone, why offer commitment? He doesn't get enough value back in exchange.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/20 10:22 AM
2

the evidence is on the hymen’s. One that's not reliable and two even if it were you'd have to sleep with her to find out, which defeats the purpose.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/20 10:02 AM
1

Both initiate sex and are open-minded regarding the other person's kinks The ex-wife would expect me to always initiate and still felt the need to play up this ‘false resistance’ (her own admission after it ended) which made me eventually give up on trying to initiate. If I ever marry again she’d be doing well to initiate more than I do and DILLIGAF if that sounds selfish
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/20 04:02 PM
3

Betabux doesn't win and it's simple why, but first, story time: Even as a guy I saved myself for marriage so that the person I'd spend my life with would also be the person with whom I'd experience the magic of discovering sex for the first time. There's no replacement for discovering it new, and so when she turned rotten and left me without the option to discover it for the first time with whoever I do spend the rest of my life with (if that ever happens), obviously that's when the suicide atte…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/20 11:13 AM
1

My Ex-wife despite being horny all the time would not kiss, hardly at all and honestly, if I somehow meet someone else and she doesn't smother me in kisses I'm not wasting an N+1 on her. Seriously compared to getting kissed up and down sex is so non-stimulating that I hardly care for it. Maybe sex is only any good if you're kissing at the same time, I don't know.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/20 10:21 AM
1

Nobody, but nobody, should ever be touching you there. You might think "oh but only one person is..." No. You can't know ahead of time that they're not just there to ruin you for the next girl. Behave as though you've got the same "nuke everything" switch on your crotch as the robot from that cartoon. Seriously. Find a way around it, somehow, just whatever you do, don't let any woman touch you, not one.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/20 10:30 AM
1

Self improvement for myself looks a lot different than self-improvement to get women. I don’t think, for example, that I’d chose the same look for myself for vanity that I’d chose to look good to women. I’m a dude who’s not attracted to dudes, and who’s never in any universe going to be able to look like what I am attracted to, that being a cute girl, so all my self-grooming is aimed not toward looking good, Per se, just toward not being ugly. Aside from that, the skills that I’d want to pick up…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/20 04:34 PM
1

Many men make jokes about how vaginas look/smell/feel. Smells like fish jokes, roast beef flaps jokes, loose vagina jokes. I think this is the crux of it. Vaginas are wet, they're sticky, because they're lined bodily fluids and mucus membranes; obviously dicks aren't much better but until the bodily fluid comes out of them they're wrapped up nice in skin, they're easier to wash, they're not constantly leaking sticky substances. They're also much easier to wrap up in latex in order to avoid havin…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/20 01:10 AM
6

I'll have a guess: Most of the time these kinds of serious illnesses affect older people, who are past the sort of "child-bearing" age. The average woman with a sick husband, even if she's opportunistic, is already past the point of having anything to gain by leaving him for someone else; they've got savings, they've got insurance, and it's not like she can land some rich guy who's out to waste money on sugar babies. Meanwhile, an opportunistic old(ish) guy with a terminally ill wife is in relat…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/20 12:43 AM
7

M26 1 From a marriage that suffered from abandonment. I really wish it was 0. I couldn’t bear to be in a relationship while missing that extra appreciation you’d have to have for a woman because she’s the first and only. All or nothing for me. Well, just nothing, now, I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/20 12:18 AM
9

Men are also slightly more likely to pass whatever they have onto a woman than the other way around, all else being equal.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/20 12:11 PM
6

I know this one girl.... Fuck it, the story's too long. Its' lack of education.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/20 10:17 AM
2

I've spoken to women I know who've been in the position of trying to use sex, and especially early-access sex, to secure commitment from, in their view, high-value males. The thinking seems to be that, if she has sex with him he'll pair-bond to her and commit. That line of thinking should work, for a guy whose butterfly factory is fresh out of its' box, but these women are going after men who have access to a lot of women. Why would sex push your brain in the general direction of 'spending the r…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/20 10:10 AM
1

hey hey, story time: So you know me you know premarital sex is a no-go. Or, it was, until that became no longer possible. still yet to decide if it’s ok going forward. Now I don’t have easy access per se, but I did meet one woman who I’d have gotten easy access from, if I’d have gone for it. She was quite aggressive in going for it, is what I’m saying. Now having just come out of a divorce I was quite reluctant, but she’s cute, and what I did want was physical touch. Which I was able to get, for…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/20 06:49 PM
1

We do it with Voles. They have this whole system; they pair-bond when they lose their virginity, then the mechanism shuts off so that when and if they cheat it doesn't override the existing pair bond. The males can turn it back on if they lose their partner, jury is out on whether or not that's at full capacity.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/20 11:50 PM
1

The problem I have with that is the same problem I'm having in my own life. I'm a guy, N=1, not my fault I got betrayed in a marriage. Technically speaking, my track record is treating sex as absolutely sacred and not engaging outside of marriage. That's all well and good, probably makes me a good prospect for a woman looking for a reserved guy, but now there's an awkward problem; say some woman tries to husband me up for some reason; she likes that I'm reserved and my attitudes about sex and bl…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/20 10:48 PM
3

Meh, I'm more concerned about missing out on the excitement of the first time. Not getting to have that with a particular girl makes the experience less than it could be. it's like movie spoilers but on a level that could fuck with my feelings toward a potential relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/20 11:29 AM
1

They shouldn't. If he's already given someone his first time, he can't elevate you above the special status that that ipso-facto gives her. I'm saying this as someone who's been ruined in that exact way.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/20 10:35 AM
2

works in the other direction, too. I'm used up, for example, from having been married before. That shit doesn't leave the body.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/20 10:32 AM
1

"but so is every other part of women's bodies. Men who rush into genital sex are clueless about women." Convinced that sex equals genital play, some men recoil from "all that touchy-feely stuff." I mean, I can only speak for myself but I think you'd have to be clueless about men to think we don't like being touchy-feely.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/20 03:43 AM
1

What’s the thing that’s holding you from wanting to experience the feeling of making love with the same person for the rest of your life Want to, can't. She would have to also be the first and only, so that I could get those butterflies, too. Bitch Ex-wife had to go and ruin that, so now I can't have genuine love for someone else because I'll always be missing out on that experience with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/20 10:05 AM
1

I suppose so, but there's nothing I can do about it now. I just want my virginity back so I can experience it with someone who I'll actually stay with. What am I meant to even do now? I did everything right and the only thing I've ever wanted in life was still ruined.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/20 09:55 AM
2

I settled down early and she fucked off leaving me broken and used. All I wanted was a pure marriage and now I can't have one; I hate being tainted.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/20 09:46 AM
7

somewhat off topic, but I think the number of couples who watch porn together must be vastly outnumbered by those who totally would, if suggested, but never think to bring it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/20 01:38 PM
1

going off my own situation, a guy who views sex as an expression of love, but is in the unfortunate circumstance of not being a virgin is in quite the predicament; If sex is an expression of love, which I think it is, then the willingness to make someone your first (and hopefully only) is an even greater expression of love. So when she ultimately abandons the marriage to start slutting around, I'm left with no way to express to a new wife that she's the love of my life; I don't get to discover s…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/20 01:20 PM
3

The real red flag is when she feels it's only fair you should know about it. If I found out she'd been hiding it then that tells me it's not actually an indicator of her attitudes or expectations in a relationship, if that makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/20 12:17 PM
1

"recycle" divorced men As a divorced guy, why? I can never discover sex for the first time again, which means no particularly unique feeling of intimacy that I can associate only with the one partner and nobody else, and so no way to have a satisfying relationship. Woman touches me now, I can barely even feel it, it's like I've grown callouses. It wouldn't matter at this point if I married and had a really active sex life, it's probably gonna feel the exact same as a dead bedroom situation with …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/20 11:59 AM
1

It reminds me of a post where a career woman thought that since she wanted a wealthy husband she needed to become a rich woman only for a wealthy male friend to tell her after she accomplished this that rich men for the most part don’t care about a woman’s money. There’s something I don’t understand about women; You try to get a wealthy husband so you can share in that wealth, but on e you’ve made a tonne of money yourself, you already have that; wouldn’t a woman in that position focus on someth…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/20 02:31 PM
1

Your partner could be attracted to twice as many people. I mean, anyone would be pissed off to be cheated on, but girl-on-girl cheating would piss me off without also disgusting me, so idk, take that for what it's worth, I guess. Plus lower risk of having her bring home an STD if that does happen. All this assuming the hoe ain't loyal, though she really ought to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/20 10:32 AM
3

probably just a biologist
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/20 12:59 AM
3

So like, Y'know how if you're addicted to drugs you need more and more to get the same effect and then keep moving to harder drugs? So like, if you've already lost your virginity, you need more intimacy than even that with another woman in order to be the most in love you've ever been. Problem is that just doesn't exist. What's more intimate than sex? There's nowhere left to go. the whole thing just ends up being pretty pointless at that point.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/20 01:31 AM
3

that only really works if you're the kind with the same size hard as flaccid though, right? Otherwise you're just the weirdo walking around with an unconcealed erection
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/20 01:12 AM
3

Let's say for the sake of argument that I'm an average guy with a colossal PP. under what circumstances is a woman going to come upon the knowledge that it's colossal? Girls don't just go around asking to see PP's on the off chance that some random guy has a big one.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/20 01:08 AM
2

I know women who've gone through all kinds of hardship and are still children, mentally. like, they've adapted just fine to poverty, or starvation, but still whine and cry over the fact that there's a limit on who does and does not approve of their life choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/20 12:19 PM
1

I want Yo-Jung to step on me I want Tulsi to tie me up Cortez isn’t very pretty I want Shappiro to kick me
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/20 01:05 AM
1

From what I can tell, physical attraction just seems to be an illusion where you associate certain values with certain physical characteristics. actually, the power of science has allowed us to predict things like homosexuality and criminal behaviour via facial recognition AI with a high degree of accuracy. https://theintercept.com/2016/11/18/troubling-study-says-artificial-intelligence-can-predict-who-will-be-criminals-based-on-facial-features/ the role of appearance in selecting for certain pe…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/20 04:49 PM
4

one who knows how to build a shelter that can actually protect us from radiation poisoning? fuck yeah
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/20 09:50 AM
1

It seems there's no middle ground. Either the bottom tier men get wives and are happy and productive while their wives are miserable. Or the women date who they want and are free to be single while bottom tier men suffer from loneliness. A woman who's not particularly in love with her man in more useless than no woman at all. Women married men they didn't feel anything for. They had sex with and raised kids for these men. The utility of being able to bear a mans' child is extremely useful and so…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/20 09:48 AM
5

I’d have thought IQ would be the factor for ensuring survival in an apocalypse, but what do I know?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/20 08:57 AM
3

M, 26, only one, from a marriage that didn't pan out. You could maybe call it higher depending what counts, but it's all been kept above the waist. I hate it. The first time is supposed to feel the best, and now if I want to find a woman I'm meant to commit to her when I don't get to get that feeling from her? It's really not a fair exchange if you ask me. Feels like I've been robbed. So, unless I can find some way to heighten my sensitivity by an enormous margin I'm going to be really salty abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/20 03:10 PM
1

In addition, love in of itself is just the manifestation of neurotransmitters firing so that copulation and the rearing of children can take place. . Yet everyone makes love out to be this special thing that we should all seek for the sake of its specialness. One of the problems I have with losing the specialness of a potential future relationship to previous experience is that it dampens said neurotransmitters function, which hurts my ability to produce and rear said children. On the one hand, …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/20 11:29 AM
2

would the drawbacks of what usually comes with adult virgin women (usually frigid/disinterested/anorgasmic, starfish sex, dead bedroom, etc) be worth the concept of virginity? My preference for the virgin is that she hasn't "been there, done that" and so less likely to be disinterested due to it being less of a novelty to her. Plus sex is the most intimate thing I can think of, so if she's shared that experience with someone else then I'm SOL trying to surpass that. Do you think it's fair for no…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/20 02:21 AM
1

I care about mine insofar as it affects my potential relationship satisfaction, and I care about a potential partners for the same reason; I'm not partnering with someone to whom I'm not special. Value? well that depends on what the opinion of women is since they seem to go for men who have been able to score higher N as an indicator of high value. The only solution I've been able to find is to politely dislike how women think on this matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/20 12:18 PM
1

I'll go ahead and be another counterexample of men all wanting to be dominant. I'd certainly prefer a passive role, if any.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/20 12:11 PM
1

I'm not about to fuck someone who's slept with other people because I don't want that peak level of intimacy if it doesn't translate to me being special in her mind. If I'm marrying her (staying with her forever) I want it to be because I'm the only person who's ever meant enough to her that she would do that. Now, on the womans' end, either she sleeps with only one guy and treasures him for it or she sleeps around and it means nothing; I'm not saying one is the 'selfish' option and the other is…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/20 11:37 AM
1

Yeah IDK what to make of any of this, but I tried. What do these test results end up looking like when you're conservative to the point of having a vendetta against sexuality? Let's take a look-see: 99% Rope bunny 85% Owner 77% Dominant 75% Pet 74% Vanilla 61% Primal (Prey) 61% Daddy/Mommy 59% Boy/Girl 59% Switch 58% Sadist 58% Submissive 56% Brat tamer 56% Brat 53% Rigger 51% Degradee 50% Masochist 47% Ageplayer 47% Degrader 47% Slave 41% Master/Mistress 21% Experimentalist 11% Primal (Hunter) …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/20 10:06 AM
1

I’ve always seen sex as a really special passionate thing but can it even be that for guys? The catch-22 is that if it’s special then it’s ruined if you’ve done it once and she’s since abandoned you. Now you don’t get to share in this special thing with your one and only woman because you’ve gone and wasted it on someone else. I think you might rather someone who doesn’t find it special than someone like me who does because when I inevitably force myself to remarry, having never had a kid in the…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/20 02:08 AM
1

I'm well aware that women don't want to be approached, so I don't approach them; I just wait for them to approach me. On the other hand, that doesn't happen either because if a girl likes you she'll expect you to approach her yourself. I have no way of knowing if that's the case, though, so I continue to wait around. And sometimes, I do get approached. She's never my type though. So sad.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/20 11:19 PM
2

Outside of PPD, sexlessness isn't even really an issue, but the sad thing about it, sexless men might shrug and go "oh well", and they're not even consciously upset about it, per se, but they do end up lacking motivation, which means a hit to their contribution in society. I don't think we'd get to the point that sexless men become such a drain on taxpayer resources that social programs collapse, but that's the worst-case scenario we're working with on a societal level, realistically. Even then …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/20 09:51 PM
1

Having sex only with one person makes that person de facto special, and honestly as a man if you've already ruined that for yourself you're now seeing your standards raised for a woman you'd want to commit to. The main resources a man can extract from a relationship are affection, validation, attention, and things to that effect, so obviously if your standards are increased you want the attention you get to be valuable attention. You want it to be from a girl who's saving that kind of attention …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/20 03:09 AM
1

a 30-year-old Unicorn is still a unicorn, so sure. Age isn't so much an issue as the increased risk of accumulating baggage the longer its' been since you were born onto this godforsaken planet.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/20 12:31 PM
8

The same thing I do. Nothing whatsoever
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/20 10:31 AM
2

Like most 26 year-olds, I look basically the same now as I did at 21. The wasted time and wasted chastity I had taken from me by marriage to a two-timing bitch makes me really just want to hurl myself into a younger crowd and claim to be the wide-eyed early 20's kid I was back the last time I was happy. I can definitely see the appeal
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/20 10:29 AM
0

women who fit those requires also require the same of the men they marry. People (Religious women) tell me that despite being involved in a divorce I could well find a woman who doesn't care, but the fact of the matter is that a woman who doesn't require a virgin husband doesn't take this seriously enough for my liking. I know I'm ruined, they don't have to try to cheer me up. I've had all my worth taken from me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/20 10:09 AM
10

I mean, why not, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/20 04:46 PM
1

Sometimes I'll neglect to call a date a date, but on the flip side of that myself and some female friend who's in the same boat (attempting to get back out there after being missing in action) will re-familiarize ourselves through the use of quote-unquote "dates", so the terminology doesn't always match the situation one way or the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/20 11:44 PM
5

with proper worldwide quarantine we could be clear of this in a few months. But the shithole countries where they refuse to do that are spoiling it for the rest of us
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/20 09:59 PM
2

What are your plans for the immediate future? Get as many people as possible on board as possible to force a border closure on my island, then ride out two or three weeks at home to make sure no cases have come in. If we keep the border closed after a quarantine has proven us safe, then we should be good
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/20 09:56 PM
1

Ontop of that clingyness can be seen as desperation, which is weak, and it's more acceptable for women to appear weak than men A man with a clingy Girlfriend has more relationship security than the other way around, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/20 10:32 AM
1

I've known a few women who've gotten out of such a situation and they all behave like the 'adopted pet' of the friend group; somewhat traumatized and apparently in need of affection, which the friend group happily chips in to provide. Now as likely as I am to score "physical touch" on one of those "love language" tests, and as much as these types of women line up with that, fact of the matter is that someone like that is extremely vulnerable and to date one would be constant worry, you'd have th…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/20 10:20 AM
1

I suppose I did, and that ended really badly. Though if we lower the threshold for what counts as "dating" we might be able to squeeze in some earlier female friends. in that case, I might not have been in the worst possible situation, but I've no way of knowing that with my shaky memory of what any of those people were even like. I'd say about average.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/20 09:49 AM
1

Women aren't raised with the idea that their future boyfriend/husband belongs to them and only them. tldr; what you're saying is accurate but I don't see a problem with it. I would have liked to belong to my future wife, and only her. I could be an outlier, but absolutely I think that way and absolutely it's supposed to be a mutual thing. That's what makes me so upset about divorce. If I remarried I feel like I'd be disrespecting the bride-to-be by even agreeing to be with her as a husband she g…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/20 09:38 AM
1

Male 26 Purple I don’t like serial monogamy at all, like you LTR one girl, love her a lot, you don’t have any recollection of loving someone that much, it’s all for her. Second girl already gets almost no honour reserved for only her. By the third you’re just going through the motions. at least with a harem you’ve got all these wives at the same time, you’re not committing to spend your life with someone who’s not really special to you, per se.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/20 12:50 AM
1

Even with the guy having an N count to speak of? I have seen studies showing that female relationship satisfaction predicts male satisfaction, which would indicate that a low-n woman without the capacity to compare is more important than a guy in the same situation for a good relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/20 01:17 AM
2

I struggle enough having an N=1 myself because there’s no guarantee that I can even pair-bond with someone else now; the divorce pretty much forced it on me so now all the waiting I did for marriage is completely wasted. So assuming you still find it in you to love a woman in an LTR despite plate-spinning, how do you do it?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/20 04:36 PM
2

0, including me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/20 12:56 PM
1

This being Mainland China
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/20 03:19 AM
3

My ex-wife is from such a culture and took the fact that I didn't cheat on her as some indication of low-value and inability to get womens' attention, for which she decided to throw me out. I've seen (a small minority of) women from that same culture go to great lengths to hook their husbands up with certain women they, I guess, deemed "high value", so they could be "the woman married to the guy who fucked such-and-such lady." Dealing with women and trying to understand them never ceases to prov…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/20 12:56 AM
2

IDK why the Telegram feels the need to shame women for the stuff they're into; I mean, not even I go that far.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/20 12:48 AM
1

unless enetering into an LTR is the only way in which a given man can obtain access to sexual interaction. The oxytocin receptors in my limbic system tempt me to say no to sex, even. Develop feelings and have them be lop-sided? Fuck that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/20 11:09 AM
3

This sort of works as an argument against marrying; in theory you'd be happiest in a marriage with a woman you love, but any love you've got for her she'll inevitably pick up on and be repulsed by. There's no winning.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/20 11:06 AM
4

would a woman who likes sex make you commit to her for it, though?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/20 08:33 PM
1

Canadian white male here 1) Do you have racial preferences when it comes to casual sex or/and LTR ? Not really. Bit of a thing for redheads, if that counts. 2) Have you ever dated out of your race ? I divorced a Han Chinese woman, so yeah 3) Are there racial types of men/women that you find unnattractive or that you will never date ? I could only speak to averages here; some ethnic groups I find have a lot of not-so-attractive members, but the good-looking ones are really attractive, to my eye. …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/20 07:53 PM
5

Before I met anybody I was waiting ‘til marriage; first time for the wife. She couldn’t respect that, snuck around, and so with no first time to save for some future wife I see no reason to enter into another LTR. If I, a man, can wait, no man should involve himself with a woman who can’t. I put myself off the market because a woman who doesn’t want her husbands’ first is much too low value for me to even go for in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/20 07:36 PM
1

When a woman cheats or When a man cheats? By a hair's length, women. Explain why, for both genders, why one is worse than the other. With women, a man could be duped into raising a kid that isn't his, which is a huge waste of resources. Women are also ever so slightly more likely to pick up an STD and bring it home. Bonus question: When is it ok to cheat? it's not. And would you ever take a cheater back? Yes/No? Why? No, that relationship would be tainted.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/20 12:43 PM
1

This whole sub seems to think STDs are a joke. But beyond that why the fuck marry a woman with experience elsewhere? The whole institution of marriage has turned into men putting all their eggs in one basket for the sake of women who continue to keep their options open after commitment. Y'know what's in my best interests as a man? the exact reverse of that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/20 12:15 PM
1

I’m cataloguing through my female friends to confirm or deny that men aren’t getting anything out of a friendship with a woman he finds attractive if he can’t fuck her... I’ve got a bunch of female friends who are perfectly interesting but who I’m not attracted to. check. I’ve got female friends where we mutually benefit eachother, but they’re not attractive. check. I’ve got female friends who are quite attractive, but the friendship offers enough benefit that not getting to fuck her isn’t a hug…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/20 09:08 PM
0

No. Throwing away a perfectly good thing is some kind of neurotic woman shit. does... does being geared toward monogamy make women worse at it? men 2000 years ago used to have harems: collections of women, so to speak. When you adapt from that to a situation where you’re limiting yourself to only one, you’re still treating her as a “collectible” as far as value is concerned, which means that under no circumstance is it a better idea to get rid of her than to keep her. Her value, and your subsequ…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/20 08:48 PM
1

desire harems is a different beast from totally losing attraction for a body you’ve become so used to men with a fantasy of having a harem don’t picture themselves wearing the novelty out of a girl and then replacing her with another; they picture themselves building a collection; adding more and more girls to the harem, but going back to the older ones quite often. whether you’ve got one nifty bottlecap or a collection of them, it’s still a nifty bottlecap.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/20 08:09 PM
1

GENUINELY believe they can get girls while looking, quite literally, any kind of way. I’ll be honest, I don’t observe looks mattering when it comes to girls. I see all kinds of slobs who have some other source of value with pretty girls all the time, and I see a lot of perpetually single good-looking guys: they have looks, but they’re not attractive per se. I’d throw myself in the later camp. I’m tall and fairly well-shaped, but still pretty low value.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/20 09:36 PM
2

So marry a woman with no career to avoid being abandoned when she gets bored~got it. I mean, a career is a good thing for a woman to have, don't get me wrong, but I base my decisions on what's good for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/20 06:17 PM
1

She’s resisting a man who won’t love her (because he doesn’t have to) in favor of a man who will (because he does). You’d think they want to be loved, wouldn’t you? That’s what any man wants.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/20 01:09 AM
3

Is this just another one of those “I want a virgin who waits until she meets me, then becomes a slut only for me” fantasies? Meh, have enough sex you’ll get bored with it eventually. At least if you marry and spend your life with a virgin you get the entirety of her ‘still enjoys it’ period, and that enjoyment is what you and you alone are known for to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/20 12:59 AM
1

how does that fare in the context of getting back into a monogamous relationship? I’m pissed I don’t get to have a pure marriage anymore; I avoided sex with anyone before this first marriage, now it’s completely wasted. No way of feeling more strongly for her than what the first got, which makes it hard to justify staying with her for life.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/20 07:24 PM
1

I had the reverse happen, one divorce having me ruined for other girls, I’ve met people online who are into casual sex; Though I may say ‘fuck it, I’m spoiled anyway’, when it comes to actually meeting I’ve just got a mental block; can’t do it. guess that just means no sex one way or the other. I don’t get my exclusive, single lifetime partner, so nothing will do and my brain shuts down for the express purpose of not making exceptions.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/20 06:55 PM
5

fingers crossed it does. Male Titi Monkeys whose first mates did not produce them children and who went through a separation and re-pairing with a new female showed signs of being more closely attached to the new partner than those who had fathered children with their first in one experiment, so you might be on to something.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/20 06:17 PM
0

-with the first partner, sex is pleasurable, but eventually you become numb to it, or worse, addicted, needing it to feel normal but never getting any real high from it. -I want to be loved in a relationship; I don’t want someone who has sex with me because she likes sex, I want it to be because she loves me. -having a past marriage 100% ruined me for other girls; There’s nothing I can do with another woman that’s more intimate than what someone else already got, so I’m completely nequient when …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/20 04:48 PM
1

define “mature”?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/20 11:14 PM
8

So what kind of job and income level should I be demanding in a woman? If she treats me well and has something to add to my life you think I'm gonna go "ehh... but she's only a barista though.."? Sounds like projection
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/20 01:18 AM
4

Do the adulterous men even love/like the other woman? I won't claim to know, but based on the low RMV of a woman who would sleep with a married man, I'mma go with "no". I see the irony, but just because it's ironic doesn't mean it's inaccurate.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/20 11:46 PM
3

If they believe a woman will leave them for someone else at the drop of the hat, it makes sense they wouldn't believe they could open up or be vulnerable or trust a partner. I don't think enough people realize this
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/20 10:37 AM
-1

an LTR is a terrible way to get 'being loved' as a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/20 10:28 AM
3

Whichever option you choose, these are the ONLY kids you'll ever have. Having Bio children is top priority, 10 of them running around with me off the hook for their finances is a dream come true vs. the absolute nightmare of sinking money into a kid who isn’t mine. but, with the choice being so obvious, you’d be just as well off asking if I’d adopt a child in exchange for having 10 (a whole goddamn 10) of my own kids running around and propagating my genes. absolutely I’d do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/20 10:20 AM
1

So like, just JO or something, idk
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/20 07:01 PM
1

Until it passes
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/20 06:20 PM
2

just wait it out?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/20 05:56 PM
2

without food you don’t continue to breathe. Without sex you don’t continue your bloodline. In that sense sex is a need on some grandiose evolutionary scale, but it’s not a super urgent one.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/20 05:14 PM
2

If you’re saying that a guy trying only to get laid and nothing else is low value, then I’m inclined to agree, but that low-value applies to the women who are fucking them, too. Nobody really wants someone who’s ‘had their fun’, do they? that gets truer as time goes on; the rarer it is to find women who are waiting until marriage, the higher the value you have if you can net one.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/20 02:23 AM
5

in fact there’s an entire second population of women that men don’t even know about because we don’t want to fuck them so the brain just doesn’t bother to process them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/20 02:09 AM
1

I... said more or less the opposite of that
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/20 01:53 AM
1

Historical marriage used to exist to punish infidelity and abandonment. Now it rewards them. Literally all that changes, legally, is that she gets half your shit in the event that she cheats on you. In China there are even couples applying for divorce and then proceeding to continue to share their life as a married couple because being legally single comes with a tax break. I’d have a ceremony, but if a woman is willing enough I’d rather not sign something that, if it does anything, will make th…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/20 10:43 PM
3

Obviously you don’t wanna wife one but who the hell wants to get married anyway? I kinda want to get married, which I of course wouldn’t do to a high-N woman, but if I didn’t just wanted to be with as many women as possible.... the two additional issues that I see are a.) the risk of catching feelings. Keeping my n count as low as I can muster and marrying a low n girl assures that I’m getting the best sex possible because the attachment is there on both sides which allows for those warm fuzzies…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/20 10:32 PM
8

Opportunistic hypocrisy I'm not sure how else to word it but my jaded ass knows I'm less capable of giving love fully to a woman, which means that I'm gonna be looking for all kinds of reasons not to date someone: a partner isn't going to give me the satisfaction that she could if I was more naive. If that's my situation then it stands to reason that a naive woman would treat me better than a jaded one. I'm not saying I demand naivety, but that's because I don't demand a relationship to begin wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/20 09:29 PM
2

I was concerned about satisfaction in a marriage suffering because I’ve already divorced, which robs any future girl of the chance to be the first and only. first time is special, y’know. someone told me not to worry, it’ll be ‘the first time with someone else’, which apparently is supposed to make me feel better? It’ll be just as good or better? My brother has a friend who smokes heavily; believes the first 3 puffs of a new cigarette are the best, so he lights one, takes 3 puffs, puts it out an…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/20 06:00 PM
24

in simple terms: Girl is pretty I try to flirt with pretty girls all the time they turn me down because they’re out of my league this one is giving me the time of day try flirting It didn’t put her off She’s still giving me the time of day now more often than not maybe she didn’t realize that he was trying to be flirtatious, so she didn’t shut him down or anything; what happens then is that additional instances of him trying to make a move and not getting stopped in his tracks pile up, so he end…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/20 05:46 PM
0

Honestly I'd take no issue at all with a sufficiently low-n stripper if that's what I found out about someone who was showing an interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/20 12:18 PM
1

I want my own kid so that I can pass on my genes. That's not to say I'd be opposed to, say, running an orphanage, but it's two different things.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/20 11:28 AM
4

intimacy is to my mind the primary generator of those feelings of attachment and love. Sex is the strongest trigger. If she did it before me, she’s got memories forever of those feelings. I can’t one-up them, I can only hope to match them, but even then the first cut is the deepest and all that jazz. end result, I don’t feel loved. One more question, when it's fine to date, commit, marry such a woman? What could she do to be worthy of commitment? worthy of commitment? I would have a mental block…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/20 01:26 AM
1

You mean to tell me both straight men and women show a tendency to be more upset about the prospect of a partner with a past shagging men than women? I want a unified theory on this, really, really badly.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/20 08:27 PM
5

given the fact that lesbian encounters so often fly under the radar when reckoning a woman’s n-count for the purposes of not being interested in her, Men and women with these two standards are basically exhibiting the exact same standard. That gives me all kinds of warm fuzzies, none of which can be explained that easily.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/20 07:43 PM
10

see, I know the evolutionary basis for straight men holding this view, but the fact that it’s common in women as well is... Worth looking into.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/20 07:38 PM
1

maybe 6? I’m not certain what number to assign but my thinking is: I’m not normally picky about looks, maybe a 4 on your scale there, but there are some very specific personality flaws that can absolutely be compensated for with looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/20 06:30 PM
1

I’ve got an image in my head as to what passes for conventionally attractive, and I’m not the least bit attracted to it. women who prove themselves to be more interesting to me I generally end up ranking as more good-looking, but the motherfucker of it is that other women with similar features also get ranked better on their looks when this happens, because it’s not so much a case of liking her looks because I like her as it is: the feature in question is attractive already, paying attention to …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/20 06:24 PM
0

Where such men love they have no desire and where they desire they cannot love. Ask any woman here who racked up an N count how she feels about her partners and you get basically a version of this. The whole basis of the Madonna-whore complex is women projecting. That said, I’d pack together ‘desire’ and ‘love’ to fall in line with how men want to be loved and amend the statement to; "Where such women love they have no stability and where they are stable they cannot love."
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/20 06:09 PM
1

Is it not possible for a woman to just genuinely enjoy getting laid and experiencing new people? perfectly possible, even relatively common; all I’m saying is that for me to commit my life to a woman with a track record of wanting to experience new people is a terrible idea. She’ll be bored of me after a week, if she decides she doesn’t want to give up experiencing new people I could end up raising someone else’s kid, just the fact that she experienced the hight of intimacy plus the first time b…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/20 03:27 AM
1

while a woman only valuing a man (let’s say me, for the sake of argument) for resources does make her selfish, I’d judge two different women who think like this differently based on the indication she gave me that she experiences “love” toward me, that being the actual butterfly-type feelings and ‘partner-preference’. While selfishness is unattractive, I don’t think it has a direct impact on that experience; there’s a difference between a woman who is with you for your money but feels nothing fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/20 03:09 AM
0

Why the vasectomy? Knock up some woman so you can pass on your genes.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/20 03:25 PM
2

See, what I've observed happening in the past is: A woman and a man enter into an FWB relationship; she's trying to secure commitment from him by luring him with sex. The guy, meanwhile, is quite happy with the arrangement because that combination of sex+friendship is basically his definition of a romance anyway. She's exclusively fucking him for the time being, so he refrains from putting a label on it for fear of ruining a half decent romance by putting it on her terms.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/20 03:37 AM
2

the odds of being satisfied in her marriage starts on its’ way down after the first. For men there’s a large decrease after the first, though the actual number after that doesn’t have much of an impact.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/20 07:45 PM
6

There’s nothing more intimate than sex, and the first time especially has the benefit of being new, and creating a strong attachment, etc. Having divorced a woman for cheating, and not having a first time still to have, no woman can really be as special to me, and she certainly can’t be special enough to spend my life with, so of course I won’t be marrying p, or dating, a second time. Extrapolating from myself, if a woman likewise didn’t have her first time to look forward to, but still insisted…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/20 03:01 PM
14

It's not that the bar is low for seducing women, it's that the bar is low for 'accidentally stumbling into some slutty woman's line of fire when she decides to slut it up'. In situations like that the reason the bar is so low is because that woman isn't even looking at you, she picks you out of a crowd with roughly the level of care you pick a bag of chips off the shelf.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/20 11:29 AM
2

a list of bad choices which often result in them being unable to pair bond as well (higher notch counts in women are correlated with higher risk of her filing for divorce). I worry about this for myself as well; first use of the hormones responsible for pair-bonding will trump anything that comes later due to the novelty of it, yet women don't seem to care about this in men. Now, my point in bringing this up is; where the hell do women get off thinking N-count is irrelevant when they must be obs…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/20 10:24 AM
1

every woman my age praises their boyfriend in the same way all the men I know praise a well-written villain in a video game; they take as a given that their goals are at odds with them, and commend them on the challenge they offer and occasionally their cuntishness, which makes curb-stomping them (i.e. forcing them to abandon their interests) more rewarding.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/20 01:34 AM
7

well because you literally just said neither is a foundation for a relationship
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 04:42 PM
2

income is not a foundation for a relationship though
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 04:39 PM
2

a lot of those ads take the form ‘no means no’ when the unfortunate incidents they’re aimed toward have a guy getting a clear yes but by underhanded means. Not disagreeing I’m just saying we need better campaigns. I’m also low-key kinda saying we need campaigns to tell women when a guy saying ‘yes’ still isn’t consent but hey, one fight at a time.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 04:21 PM
2

You still miss out on the opportunity to get the excitement of the first time with him. Being able to associate him and him alone with that excitement could make you much more satisfied to be with him long-term. If you commit and marry him that’s the rest of your life you’re talking about, for an undertaking like that you benefit greatly by keeping the human body’s most potent social bonding tool away from other people, especially the first time where those feelings of attachment hit as hard as …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 04:13 PM
5

It makes relationships seem like this cold, cerebral game of manipulation on both sides. lol I wish. Once you’ve spent your whole life saving that first time for marriage, letting fireworks go off for that one girl and having the chemical cocktail going off in your brain that makes you view her as special (i.e. worth committing to) only to have her leave take all that away from you so you never can feel that for someone else, much in the way you lose sensitivity to an addictive drug that doesn’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 03:59 PM
8

lying about it won’t make your relationship better though. The consequences will still be present.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 03:45 PM
2

Is anyone seriously suggesting they do? really?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 11:24 AM
1

I'm a bit confused, in this situation do I also not have a choice? What's my backstory?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 10:28 AM
1

I agree, it’s about balance. Distancing yourself from a stranger is no way to get them interested in you, for example, because he won’t think you’re worth pursuing if it’s not going to work. meanwhile, cold-shouldering your boyfriend out of nowhere will just make him resentful. If I had to be honest, I don’t think this is anything to do with making him more attracted to you; really you’re just giving him permission to take the initiative. Of note, too, is that there’s a difference between allevi…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/20 03:52 PM
2

Females on the other hand usually dont use guys to get off, because most girls cant expect an orgasm from casual sex. Also women usually have to be physically and mentally attracted to the guy. If she’s willingly fucking a guy she just met, she clearly intends this to be some casual thing, right? I don’t like hookups, but they’re not the type of thing with a victim and a perpetrator, its’ two consenting adults who wouldn’t be fucking if they didn’t intend to get something out of it, and who shou…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/20 03:23 AM
6

Why assume that the guy(s) she slept with had their way with her rather than that they shared a mutual experience? Sex is special to us. Having sex with only one person means that said sex makes them special. If you’ve already done it with someone else, especially out of love, we’ll next you for someone to whom we can be more special than we could ever be to you. IDK why other guys use such harsh language to convey this, probably frustration. Do they innately see ejaculating inside a woman as a …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/20 03:08 AM
1

your cause-and-effect is a bit backwards; If a high N woman wants me long term, agreeing to that is bad for me because I’m low value to her. Sex isn’t a scarce resource to her, and so she won’t value me for it, which means in that relationship that I’ll go unloved.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/20 07:42 PM
1

see, my male brain can’t make head or tail of this. “sure, it’s fine if he loved someone enough to have sex with them before, making his love for me less special, but god forbid he paid for it.” I mean, neither is good, one is worse to my mind and it’s the one women are OK with.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/20 07:37 PM
1

Does this hard nope them for relationships? It's a red flag for things that I would hard nope, but I'd look past it if I knew for a fact it was a false flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/20 03:15 AM
1

If you’ve cheated a crime has been committed - her having a sexual past b4 you is not a ‘crime’ unless you’re an insecure misogynist beta Male. Neither of those things are illegal. It's up to the person in question whether or not to accept them.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/20 10:53 PM
0

Not that I'm in the market to date anyway, but on the off chance a girl is interested enough to give me a second chance, it's an immediate red flag. I don't trust second-chance givers.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/20 10:47 PM
2

well it’s a bit late to want anyone now, so..
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/20 09:34 AM
1

For me, sex is the highest level of intimacy and bonding, through hormone release and its’ subsequent effects on the brain. If its’ been done before meeting ones’ lifetime partner then more than one person has to share that highest position. I’m already divorced, so I’ve excluded myself from having any kind of relationship ever again. Being with anyone but the love of my life, which she can’t be if I haven’t experienced the highest intimacy with only her, just isn’t acceptable. It’s a waste; the…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/20 12:49 AM
1

It’s pretty petty to say anything insulting to someones’ face, which is why not all men insult women who reject them; not all men are petty. of course, what men think is another matter entirely, and the sour grapes thought is generally a good way to deal with something like rejection. pretty girl turned you down? No problem! Think about her flaws and how shitty she’d be as a partner anyway. Once you’ve secured a woman you can thank your lucky stars that she was able to get with you because that …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/20 01:55 AM
1

That’s true. It probably wasn’t predictable. still though, my next wife will be missing out on so much. It seems almost contradictory to think that I could call someone the love of my life when the highest level of intimacy I could offer wasn’t reserved exclusively for her and there’s no higher level for me to bust out and offer her either. I can’t experience the first time with her, hence I miss out on the experience of uniqueness.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/20 06:28 PM
1

Of course, both you and your partner love each other immensely. Like, magically? any preexisting impediments be damned? Yes, please. Kissing is fine Fuck, count me in. I never got that in my first marriage. sex may or may not happen on the long run I want my own biological children, is the only thing. Sex once, or at least until we can conceive? Meanwhile I’mma load up on those kisses, that shit is cash.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/20 05:56 PM
1

Do you interact much with guys who have ‘a couple mistakes’ in their past? I was married once and she was unfaithful; prior to that I’d waited until marriage, and now with regard to marrying again I’m really not keen since the new wife could never receive the benefits that the first got from my having waited. If she’s not the first and only, that means there are fewer degrees of attachment for me to feel for her and only ever her, which cheapens it. The question, then, is how to go about overcom…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/20 05:38 PM
0

Love is pair-bonding and partner preference. It’s chemical, and it’s generated by intimacy, especially sex. The returns on this are diminishing. Exiting a sexual relationship leaves one’s pair-bonding mechanisms with much less functionality. Love can only exist once; someone can’t be the love of your life if they’re not getting a feeling of attachment from you that someone else never got. It’s cheapened that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/20 03:45 PM
1

I’m saying I didn’t attempt to game them and they persisted
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/20 01:25 AM
1

you’d go to the trouble of training a tonne of restaurants to do that instead of just one?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/20 11:34 PM
1

We have to LEARN how to enjoy sex What, by getting used to variety and then cutting said variety at the source by committing to just one guy? yeah, my gourmet food tour to 67 different countries really trained me to enjoy the same meal everyday for the rest of my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/20 10:45 PM
0

diminishing returns on the neurological process responsible for romantic attachment, sex triggers the strongest response, which wears it down, and even if it didn’t do you really want someone who can only feel as strongly for you as she did for someone else? wouldn’t you want to be the love of her life? none of this “equal” nonsense. It happened to me. I’m reluctant to marry again knowing she won’t mean as much to me, and I therefore won’t be as happy to be with her. Women get hit even harder.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/20 10:39 PM
2

this was not the case for the last three girls to approach me, which is 100% of the approaches I’ve gotten since the divorce. They just attempt to convince you from the get-go
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/20 10:27 PM
5

it affected mine. That’s just fact.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/20 10:14 PM
2

being dominant? I mean it’s OK, but it’s not my favourite. I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship where I’m only ever dominant; burying her face in a pillow, whipping, tossing her around and whatever. I’d want to spend some time either close to her or underneath her or something. What I’m forced to imagine the appeal is, going off my guy brain, of being dominated in such ways as having ones’ head buried in a pillow let’s say, is that blocks some of your vision and let’s you focus on whatever it…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/20 10:08 PM
2

too nice It hurts
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/20 07:55 PM
1

From an early age I wanted to have only one sexual partner so that she'd be special to me and I could, y'know, tolerate her long enough to have a baby; I even got, I shit you not, suicidally depressed when a divorce ripped that away from me. I can't imagine life with someone now who doesn't carry with her the benefit of that strong attachment you'd have toward a woman by virtue of her being the only person you've ever been intimate with, and the fact that the women I have to choose from are limi…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/20 01:22 PM
1

supposing she abandoned him, would you still need to be divorced or widowed yourself to accept that? what's the thought process?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/20 12:59 PM
1

Similarly (since I know this is what you're getting at), if a guy cares about hot pornstar sex then he should date a girl who's willing to give him that now, point blank period. I don't understand being fine with not getting something until you find out that other people got it. If you want the thing, find someone willing to give you the thing. What a man really wants from a woman he's committing to for the long haul is to be special to her. He wants to be the love of her life, and that translat…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/20 12:55 PM
1

knowing why Men remarry at a higher rate than women would fix all my problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/20 12:20 PM
1

what about a divorcee then?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/20 12:15 PM
1

I do know this and my motivation is gone completely. I never do anything anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/20 12:13 PM
0

second is worse. She’s absorbed the DNA of the few she’s had. First girl has at least the hope of having someone be the first and only to do that to her. Neither are great though, having the experience of sex cheapens it when and if she does it with you; she doesn’t see you as special.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/20 08:35 PM
2

that’s been my admittedly limited experience, yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/20 08:08 PM
3

Someone I know, for that matter, a woman I know, very recently expressed the sentiment that by sleeping around and "getting good at sex", a man will make himself more worthy of marrying a virgin. I was a bit confused too.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/20 11:28 PM
2

I would want to lock down a partners' sexuality, but it's no good to do so after someone else has already gotten to her, and it's risky one way or the other. I've been married once already, and I wanted that for myself as well, so my happiness in a relationship would be adversely affected since the experience wouldn't be unique anymore. That puts "relationship guy" off the table. I want genetic offspring really bad though, so I'm kinda relegated to knocking someone up. It sucks.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/20 01:12 PM
1

The male imperative abhors providing for someone else's child, and it abhors offering much of anything in the way of commitment to a woman who's had her fun elsewhere; i.e. he's not special to her. Beta providers are the stepdads; they're the men who stepped up and married a woman who's already had her fun. Providing for a virgin woman? Perfectly Alpha. Marrying an ex party girl? Beta.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/20 10:57 AM
8

You’re half right. I was in China so I’ll use that as a reference point. Chinese women believe a lot of things about westerners that simply aren’t true, namely that we’re all loaded and wealthy. An incel in the west can easily take advantage of these types of myths and get laid, or married, fairly easily. I recommend the former, the later could bring some serious problems, not necessarily that she’s using you or anything, though some certainly do, but she’s not sticking around once she’s disillu…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/20 04:53 PM
1

I held myself to the same standard, and got really upset after a messy divorce to not be able to continue to, and now my female friends yes, female are slowly but surely talking me down to just keeping a double standard about it because, get ready, men and women are different
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/20 03:49 PM
2

They say they've always had a better relationship with someone who is like guy no.2. (and often are still in that relationship). But had more fun at the start of the relationship with dudes that were like guy no.1. And would have a ONS more often with this type of guy. The male preference regarding marriage is a woman without ONS experience, or sexual experience whatsoever, for that matter. In the absence of that (because it’s somewhat rare) sex with women without commitment carries the advantag…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/20 03:40 PM
2

seconded. Hands off the kids, they didn’t do anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/20 05:18 PM
1

except it's aimed at men and no equivalent aimed toward women exists. I mean, you wouldn't start a program to teach women "only yes means yes, so only say 'no' when you mean 'no'" because that's patronizing, but as far as the "don't be a rapist" program goes, they don't really gear themselves toward women respecting "no" in and of themselves. Actually, remember that case way back when, where a woman took advantage of a dude who was passed out drunk and had no idea what was going on, but then he'…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/19 12:14 PM
2

My cheating ex-wife blamed me for taking ‘no’ for an answer when apparently it didn’t mean ‘no’. moral of the story, don’t stick your dick in crazy. alternatively; teach your women about affirmative consent, you yourself know all about it already, she’s the one who don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/19 01:27 AM
2

To the best of my knowledge, strip clubs are where you take your shy friends to demonstrate to them that they can have a passable conversation with a woman and not die. That they’re more engaged than real women on account of it being their job is irrelevant, what’s relevant is the fact that you didn’t die. My experience with OLD makes me think this is similar to what a lot of the women on there experience, but different.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/19 01:17 AM
2

the hormone receptors for oxytocin supposedly down-regulate, and immunoreactive fibres supposedly form preventing a pair-bond from forming. the concern is not being able to feel attachment
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/19 10:07 PM
2

before, I knew about the lower odds of being satisfied with a partner if she wasn’t the only one, so I avoided having more.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/19 01:41 PM
6

divorce due to infidelity, basically. I could marry again, but she’d be the second. Better than her being the 28th, but that doesn’t mean I’m happy with the situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/19 01:09 PM
9

I’m a guy who’s both perpetually horny and deeply upset to have lost the ability to limit sex to only one lifetime partner (and before that of course, committed to limiting myself to only one) So it’s hardly contradictory to my mind to want an exclusively monogamous slut.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/19 01:04 PM
1

I mean, that’s the exact image, and I’m more than sure it’s instinctual. There’s no helping it, but that’s how it manifests, with an image of cross-contamination in the same vain as cutting meat and vegetables with different knives. I’m still abiding by said image, I trust it’s there for a reason. A sound, evolutionary one.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/19 03:46 AM
1

True enough, I'm this close to done claiming to be honest.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/19 11:01 PM
1

Something like that, honestly
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/19 10:57 PM
3

Or even worse! “But women have sex with serial killers!” Solution: Behave like a serial killer in every aspect except purposely causing peoples' deaths.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/19 10:49 PM
2

Agreed. If she cheats and you have kids, worst case scenario you stay with her and those kids aren't yours and you raise genetic dead ends, best case scenario they are your kids, but you leave, remarry and diversify the spread of your genes into the next generation.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/19 10:47 PM
0

The red flag inherent in 2 is that if she loves sex that much... 2 if both women are necessarily the exact same in terms of N count (0 being optimal, of course) 1 otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/19 10:43 PM
1

When a woman is upset that maybe she’s not that attractive, Feminists won’t tell her that ‘looks don’t matter’, they’ll tell her that all women, including her, are beautiful. This does not line up with an ideology that says male approval is not the be-all, end-all. Like what the hell benefits does beauty get you, realistically? it’s certainly not the practical skill that a degree in mathematics is, but women in STEM only gets lip service, when it comes down to college applications, those same fe…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/19 04:02 PM
18

My guess based on a small sample size of people I know is perhaps that men who get less sex within their marriage are stressed, stress makes them anal-retentive about how neat the house is, they clean and do laundry out of dissatisfaction for how well the wife does those things. Because they’re stressed.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/19 03:55 PM
2

I don’t; I think the muslims who keep raping women and the Central africans who keep getting involved in gang violence are subversive. Koreans are the best kind
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/19 08:34 PM
0

I've heard tell from women who rack up a high(-ish) N count because they go through fuckboys, thinking, for the longest time that a good way to get a commitment is to give the guy that high from sex so they'll be attached. The men, however, interepret the easy sex as a sign that she doesn't want anything more, and once she's racked up that N count they don't think she's serious due to that (and some understand that she's looking for that, but themselves would prefer a low-N to Virgin for commitm…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/19 07:07 PM
1

I get the sense that women in general, if you ask them how happy they are "in their lives" will consider how they feel in the moment, instead of their overall happiness in their situation, while men catalogue through their situation in life and answer according to a fuller picture. This, again, being when asked.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/19 06:46 PM
1

There are plenty of older women, even post-menopause, who I'd find attractive, but I do ultimately want my own kids, which puts them off-limits for marriage. So I don't care in theory but the logistics don't pan out in all cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/19 06:35 PM
2

I’d spend a lot under two circumstances: I already know the girl, she’s a friend who agreed to a date I just really want to go out for a nice meal and it’s nothing to do with her, I just in the moment need a +1. in my own life, both those scenarios are pretty likely. I’m not spending big to go out with someone I just met online though.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/19 05:43 PM
1

Prairie voles have been studied extensively as a model for monogamy. They form a pair-bond with their first mate, part of that process is that two different types of dopamine receptors flip their effectiveness. When cheating happens, a new pair bond isn’t formed because the wrong type of dopamine is released. Loss of a partner causes the brain to attempt to revert back so a new partner can be recognized as ‘the wife’, but studies show that the voles spend less time with their new mate than the f…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/19 05:10 PM
4

Males of more or less all species dislike female promiscuity, but especially in species where individuals pair up, because it hurts their paternity assurance. Females, on the other hand, get anxiety about male promiscuity insofar as it’s a symptom of his likelihood to abandon her. contrary to that, if you were a man banging a known promiscuous woman who afterward wanted to make you her life partner, you’d make every effort to escape that fate in favour of a woman who could offer you paternity as…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/19 04:17 PM
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