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Creative-Drop1816 Archive

View 0 posts and 72 comments by Creative-Drop1816 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

If. -Spartans response to Phillip II of Macedon
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 04:25 PM
1

I filed, not what I signed up for. She did not work hard enough . Wanted to coast and ride my coat tails all the way to retirement and spend everything I made until I got there. Making half of what I used to feels like a 100% raise.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 06:14 PM
1

No, not a good reason. Stick with it, nothing wrong with being bored. Find some hobbies, maybe find some that you can do together. Life has ups and downs man, the key is staying on the ride and enjoy it together. Celebrate her accomplishments and she will be your cheerleader again. Be her rock and she will repay your stoicism with compassion and feminen charm. You both have to try and be present in each other's lives. Spark is not something that happens unconsciously, it is both parties being fu…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/23 11:15 PM
2

I can confirm that in MN there is no jail time for Alimony, but you can most definitely go to jail for missing your child support payments. It is rare, but I have seen it happen. The courts will sometimes keep them in custody on cash bail only in the amount of what they owe in back support. You have to prove you can't pay it and if you can and they find out they will force it out of you one way or the other.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/23 02:11 AM
3

If you have no kids together you have no reason to be on the phone with her for hours. She is continuing to get comfort from you. If I had the option I would have cut my Ex out completely. WALK AWAY!!!!....for good.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 01:52 AM
3

It doesn't sound like this guy is struggling at all, doesn't need anything from anyone, things are just coming easy. Seems like a pretty good spot to be in. I think what you are missing my guy is a true goal. Not a hobby with an end goal, not an accomplishment, but a true life long goal, or life changing goal. If things are just seamlessly happening for you and you don't feel accomplishment, set your bar higher. Either that or become comfortable with just being comfortable. Try joining a school …
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:50 PM
1

Document....Document ....Document. keep your texts, record whatever you can. Do not interigat your kids though. It is in your kids best interest not to be with someone who would do something like that or even threaten it. Unfortunately, the courts are not in favor of men, but the more BS she spews out, and the more unstable she appears the less likely they will be to give her more custody/days than you. Just do what ever you need to do to keep your kids safe. If it gets to be a dangerous situati…
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/22 04:17 PM
1

Just keep being a "cold gray rock" just like it sounds you have been doing. Some women will never get over the fact that they hold no power over the relationship they once had. This may continue for years. It has been 4 years since my divorce and my Ex will still try to bait me into arguments, text me for something "urgent" and then not respond in kind. These little things are very easy to ignore. If all she does is ignore you just do the same and eventually things work themselves out. What I fi…
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/22 08:13 PM
1

Look at the person you are hiring, not the firm or the fancy titles. You want someone willing to go the distance. If they start telling you what to expect or don't like the picture they are painting move on to the next attorney. Stay away from the paper pushers. If they start talking about filing excess paperwork and requesting to do the work themselves they will churn papers for days with your hard earned money. They are hard to find, but if you can get one that wants to make an honest buck and…
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/22 10:06 PM
3

It is very hard to predict. Seeing as how every state is different. I made 3x as much as my Ex and I pay for about 85% of max child support which is $600 mo. It doesn't seem to bad until you add the $400 mo In alimony. $1000 bucks a month still not to bad right? Wrong, plus I am court ordered to pay for all of my child's insurance through my job. Which is a government job that I am now incapable of leaving if I wanted to even if I could get a job that paid more. So in all I pay my Ex $1000.00 ca…
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/21 09:20 PM
2

I agree, it is all in your mind. Even the pills are mostly a mind trick for some men. You got to get your confidence back. I know it is easier said than done, but I was literally in the same position as you a few years back and I suffer from chronic knee pain from shattering my patella years ago. You have to dig deep and realize that you are still the king you once were, and that you have that beast trapped inside that you have to let out from time to time. Set some PR's (personal records) it do…
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/21 08:57 PM
4

Let's just hope that these changes and reforms don't put us men in a more disadvantaged position then we already were. I hope this does do some good and change things for the better.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/21 03:27 AM
1

And thank you for an insightful, deep, and meaningful conversation.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/21 01:46 AM
1

That seems to be the go to argument when someone is told to take responsibility for themselves. Echoed in the chambers of the leftists of Reddit. "Things were hard for one, so they should be hard for all" BS. I got a slogan too "life is suffering" -Buddah The point of the story wasn't that my life was hard or her life was hard. It was the fact that she did the hard thing anyway. She could have played a victim, but she didn't. She took the higher and much harder path of walking it alone and shoul…
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/21 12:16 AM
3

Your anecdote is just that an anecdote. Here is mine: I was raised by a woman who was left with nothing by 3 different men and 4 girls to raise. She was powerful enough to raise those 4 girls and then have all 4 of them become resentful that they didn't have designer name brand things. I was taken in by this angel who had not been given anything from anyone her entire adult life. She is my grandmother and I am a son of one of those resentful daughters. We had a roof, clothes and food and the big…
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/21 09:44 PM
4

Alimony and child support are a scam and part of the problem. It is the same as being sold to slavery. If a man is forced to pay child support and alimony the government is essentially making you an indentured servant to another person. Life is a gamble for men and women a like. If you were happily married one day and your bread winner that had no savings or life insurance gets hit by a bus you now have nothing. Marriage should be treated the same. Women need to take the 50% and hit the bricks a…
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/21 07:18 PM
6

Don't mix business with pleasure. Your son us to young to remember where, when, or who he spends Xmas with. I would not start setting a precedence for doing holidays together. Do your own Xmas with him and get him used to the new normal as quickly as possible. Kids need stability and consistency.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/21 06:47 PM
1

Not necessarily, depends on the state your from. Some states consider it abandoning the home, but others do not care as long as you continue to foot the bills.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/21 06:38 PM
5

Exactly this^ Don't look at other men as your adversary....she is....and don't lose sight of that. Try and use it to your advantage if anything. If a guy helped me out like my man Jbr74 got helped out I would have bought that man a Rolex for all the money he saved me in payments. Let her think another guy will take care of her and she will expect less from you. She is not your problem anymore and you have to detach yourself from her. Good luck my Brother
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/21 06:34 PM
13

Yes, absolutely divorce hurts women less. We have a system that is set up to cater to women's every need. They have financial aid programs for single mothers and an endless sea of help for the poor damsels in distress. I think women do go through more emotional pain from the severing of the relationship, but men suffer more over the long run. Men have to endure the abuse for years on end especially when a clean cut cannot be made i.e. forced government payments, support, children custody issues.…
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/21 03:57 PM
2

Amen Brother lol
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/21 03:21 AM
1

Yes, I'm paying the correct amount lol. Regardless of custody amount. Unless I have 100% and she is deemed an unfit mother it was based purely on the amount of income I make compared to hers. I make about triple what she makes and my attorney was a fucking scumbag and convinced me to lock in my payment rather than be able to go back and adjust it later. So I can't go back and change it even if she got a better paying job. I always advise people to get a good attorney and find one that actually c…
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/21 02:43 AM
2

Exactly this^
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 11:59 PM
5

Even with 50/50 I still pay maximum the state allows in child support alone, this isn't counting maintenance as well. Our system is so broken, because women refuse to except their financial responsibilities for children.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 11:58 PM
5

Put your expectations out there. If she is unwilling to at least try harder and make some progress then by all means show her the door. Watching kids and being granted the ability to spend every waking minute with her kids is a gift and it sounds like she is squandering it. Good luck my guy
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 10:59 PM
3

You know what to do. Reread your post. It's time to move on. They will say what you want to hear for as long as it takes then when you least expect it she will go back to business as usual. Women pray upon men's nature to adapt and adjust to uncomfortable situations and use it against us. They can make things seem better when they are in fact worse. Don't be manipulated. Good luck my guy
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 10:44 PM
1

Yes to this^ Preach Brother
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 10:34 PM
9

This is Honestly one of the only safe spaces anymore on reddit. Seems like people on other subgroups only come onto this platform to seek validation or to hear the answers they feel to already be true. Seems like most the men seeking advice hear are actually looking for honest opinions and real tangible advice. I don't know how many posts I have seen with some gender, race, or politically baited question that someone obviously knows is going to piss people off and some reddit monitoring lackey t…
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 10:27 PM
1

If you finance it you will pay for it out of the proceeds of your assets when they are liquidated at the end of your divorce. I had my attorney keep track of how much my bill was going to be and saved money doing a job on the side so I had enough to pay it off quickly after everything was settled and I was able to use my proceeds to go toward setting me up with a place and some furniture. Of course this only applies if you have enough assets to cover all your debts and then some. All debts will …
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 02:36 AM
2

You don't have a wife and 3 kids, you have 4 children. Get out of this disaster as soon as possible.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/21 01:41 AM
7

Take it one day at a time. Find some hobbies and get out their and enjoy just being with people. Maybe go to the gym or find places to talk with people. I've recently started small talk while in line at grocery store or pumping fuel. They don't need to last long, but it's good practice and enjoyable. Stay strong Brother
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 08:44 PM
6

No worries, if someone could have given me similar advice years ago I would have greatly appreciated it and it would have saved me a lot of money, time, and energy. Seems like you got your shit together though, and it's good to hear that you look at everything in life as an investment. You are way ahead of the game already, best of luck to you. Stay strong Brothers
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 08:37 PM
5

Not possible in my state and many others. WI is a No-fault marriage state. Both parties have to go to a class about divorce and kids (if you have children) An initial divorce appearance to start the divorce, quarterly progress hearings and if terms are already met before the last hearing you can get divorced in about 1 year. It is crazy to me how much divorce varies from state to state. I've herd stories of divorce taking 6 weeks a d feel sorry for the poor bastards that it takes over 2 years. P…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 08:22 PM
11

I would say this: I didn't see the red flags, but look at her family very closely. Does the mom work? Is the Dad a pushover? What about her parents relationship upsets you? For men we are built way differently. A man can leave everything behind and is not influenced by his parents/family. In my experience I did not look at the roots of the tree and realize where the fruit was coming from. Women gravitate back to their family.....every time. Even after they sign that contract stating that you are…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 08:11 PM
3

I'm living my best life now. Glad you are too. Cheers Brother
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 05:25 PM
9

My Ex accused me of cheating once, nothing crazy, no fighting or anything, but it broke my spirit that she would even say something like that to me. I think deep down that was the day that broke our relationship. It was like all the trust and foundation of the relationship I had spent years building got wiped away with a single accusation. I remember thinking to myself how could the person I care for so deeply and has promised to do the same and is supposed to feel like this for me even consider…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 05:10 PM
5

It just takes time brothers. Keep yourselves busy. Pick up some OT, go workout, hang with friends. Be free. Good luck my guys
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 02:04 AM
4

Reread my post, I think you got to the part you didn't want to hear and knee jerk responded. I am talking about the overall hierarchical flaws in our system. I am truly concerned about what they try to put into our children's heads. Whether we like to believe it or not attitude is everything and no person has the right to tell anyone they are less than or greater than anyone else. If you read the post thoroughly you would realize I was talking about my child in particular, and that is exactly wh…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/21 01:37 AM
1

Find a cheap apartment for now, absolutely don't buy anything of value and lock down debt. If you are planning a divorce make sure your stbxw does not spend you into the poor house. Get an attorney involved ASAP and see if you can freeze any credit accounts. Good luck my guy
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 05:34 PM
4

In the words of Admiral Ackbar "it's a trap" -Star Wars. Be careful for the love bombing. Sometimes women do that whole I understand thing meanwhile they deep dive your finances, hire an attorney, and take you to the cleaners. Keep a close eye on the situation. If it works out for you good for you, just be cautious brother. Good luck my guy
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 05:09 PM
3

Preach Brothers, Everything on this thread so far is gold. I can't stress the plan part enough. Get a lawyer involved before you tell her. Have him break down the costs and the timeline. Figure out if you can move out right away. All the things man, do all the things. Get every little detail worked out and have a backup plan for your backup plan before you tee it up. If you can do it somewhere with witnesses I would even try and do that. Sometimes when you drop the D-bomb the crazy really comes …
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 05:02 PM
11

No worries, Rant away. That's what we are here for. You are lucky compared to some. I only get about $1200 a month to take home and that is before housing and car and insurance etc. I can barley afford to feed my kid without going into debt. For some reason society recently has taken a turn and decided to shit on men for all of its problems and heaven forbid if you are a white man. Sidenote: kids school has been cramming white privilege down his throat. Anybody else furious about this? Since whe…
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 04:41 PM
2

Depends on the severity of the trauma I suppose, 3 years post and it still creeps in from time to time. I do notice that every passing day it gets less painful and the frequency and severity of thoughts becomes less and less. I don't believe it will ever go away, but I do feel like I will be comfortable about it one day. A big trigger for me is seeing my paycheck. Every other week I get a nice little kick in the balls to remind me of the mistake I made. I think once all of that is done I will be…
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 03:03 PM
1

The sooner the better. The longer the two of you are together the longer any potential alimony might be. If she losses her job and follows up with divorce papers you'll be on the hook. If she is trying to control you then you need to leave. She does not respect you if she thinks she can manipulate you into doing what she wants. Cut and run Good luck my guy
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 03:52 AM
10

Be careful with being noble. I feel like you are probably well off, but things can change rapidly. Being fair in this situation turns against men very quickly. I didn't believe my attorney when he said the courts would be more than willing to make me live off of $1200 with 50% custody. I told him that was basically destitutely poor. He literally told me the courts do not care about men. I am basically an indentured servant. I am tied to my job that I wanted to quit as soon as the divorce was fin…
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 02:53 AM
4

Amen Brother, Thanks for sharing. I'm so happy for you and glad you are are making progress in your journey of healing. I am also grateful for this group. It is incredibly helpful just knowing that others are going through the same thing and advice is sometimes all you need to make powerful changes in your life. Stay strong brothers
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/21 03:57 PM
6

EPIC!!! LMFAO. 🔥 That was so good I had to go back and read it again
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/21 03:15 AM
2

It is amazing. You have to make small adjustments, but it is so worth it. I would suggest sitting at the counter/bar at the diners or when eating out. You meet lots of interesting people. If going to the movies alone weirds you out you can always invite a freind. I usually go by myself, but from time to time I have my son come with. It will feel weird at first, but eventually you realize that the "norm" you thought everybody follows is really just a construct of your own mind. Nobody else thinks…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/21 03:45 PM
2

Rock on, good for you my guy. Hitting zeros on Credit card was an amazing feeling for me as well. It was like I finally hit the reset button on my financial recovery. Keep grinding guys
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/21 08:35 PM
2

Get a lawyer, you make to much to gamble with. The attorney fees will feel like a Swedish message compared to what could happen if she blind sides you with an attorney. I am divorced myself and have several buddies that are divorced. Very different circumstances for us. We have kids and average of 12 years of marriage under our belts. Out of all the of them only one couple was able to get all the way through it without an attorney. At some point an impasse is usually met and it gets ugly. If you…
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/21 09:27 PM
1

Nope. If he charges you and you shot him in the leg and he is able to overpower you...you are dead. Shooting to wound is much more difficult than non-shooters realize. It takes years of practice to be that good, and you have to constantly go and practice at a gun range to maintain that skill.This is why shooting to wound is not trained. Shooting is a daminishable skill.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/21 10:37 PM
2

This is 100% facts: I had it set up where pick up and drop offs are done at the kids school and in a designated public place in the summer time and Holidays. The school year pick ups are amazing, I can go months without having to see my Ex and I don't have to have the stupid arguments.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/21 03:29 PM
3

Get a temporary child custody agreement ASAP so you can have some custody of your daughter, but definitely get your drinking under control first. Sorry you had to go through that mess. Good luck my guy
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/21 03:23 AM
18

Yes, please be careful guys. There is no reason why this needed to happen. Get everything in your divorce decree including child custody and follow it to a T. If pickups and dropouts become an issue get the cops involved. Never go on another man's property and threaten them. This should be obvious, but apparently it needs to be explained. Keep your temperature in check, remember to be a Grey rock. This guy is never going to be able to see his kid again and the child will have to live with this f…
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/21 03:15 AM
3

I agree, this is going to be self defense. This is in Texas and he came on to another man's property then threatened to take his self defense weapon away from him and kill him with it. I got to completely disagree with you on this. The short guy is definitely trained and probably prior military. The way he is holding the firearm he is preparing for the guy to try and take it. He follows a clear escalation of force. He tried talking sense into him: Shout: He shouted at the man to tell him to get …
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/21 03:03 AM
1

Just keep doing your thing, don't rush into anything or try to force feelings that aren't there. It can take a long time before you feel like you can date someone for real again. Find a good hobby, and keep hanging out with the kid, the women can wait. Keep your head up King
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/21 09:36 PM
2

Wish I could my guy, and thanks for starting the conversation. I haven't been able to cry in what feels like forever. I havent been able to properly mourn losing a family member since I was little. I truly wish I could. I lost the ability to cry somewhere in my late teens. I think there is a time and a place for everything. Including a good cry when necessary. I am raising a strong and independent young man and I make sure to encourage him to cry when he needs to. Telling young men crying is a s…
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/21 08:09 PM
2

Yep, unfortunately society makes it seem like only men wreck homes and sleep around. As a lot of us know this simply isn't the case. It's a shitty situation to be in and I feel for you. The purgatory stage of waiting for the divorce finalization was the worst part for me as well. My friend went through your same predicament, but had 3 kids. His Ex was sleeping around with guys from their tiny town and hardly ever watched their kids. The worst part is after he watched the kids through the entire …
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/21 04:56 AM
1

Edit: oh the courts may also want you to use your savings to first pay off her car before the savings is split, but again this is a state by state basis
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/21 04:10 PM
1

It depends on what your states laws consider to be "fair". This money that your parents gave you would be considered a gift and you might be able to keep said money. However, you did make a boo boo by using the money to pay her student loan and it can be considered comingeling your funds now. You might be able to make the argument that you paid them off as a "gift" for your wife, but it is unlikely they would let you do that. If it is a considerable amount of money then it would be worth spendin…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/21 04:06 PM
3

Amen, preach my brother. This is 100% facts. Half of something is still more than what you are getting now. Also, have you seen a bank statement from your MIL about this alleged money? I also wouldn't be surprised if your MIL is destitutely poor and they are leading you to believe that all your support will pay off in the end, but really their could be no money. Either way it's a lose lose situation.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/21 02:46 PM
4

It seems like you have already made up your mind. Just do it. You don't need anyone's permission. I had similar issues with my Ex and my MIL. I never had to live with mine though...thank God. If you haven't already and feel like things can be saved you might want to have that conversation first. It seems like you are struggling with more than just your marriage though. You should read "No More Mr. Nice Guy". It's a game changer. You don't have to let your MIL live with you and you don't have to …
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/21 04:26 AM
1

Yep, I wish I could have gotten mine done in 75 days, over a year felt like an eternity at the time. I
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/21 09:30 PM
1

This is true, even if you leave that anxiety will not go away until you know exactly what you will owe in the long term and you get those final walking papers. Like I mentioned earlier I was able to move out, but I paid for everything for the entire year while I was waiting for it to be finalized. I still felt like shit, but I did not have ti worry about losing my shit in front of my son. You can have an attorney set up a temporary agreement until your divorce is finalized so you can see your ki…
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/21 08:40 PM
14

First off I'm sorry my guy, but you got absolutely played. If she is getting 2k a month in child support that should have been your first clue. I have a female cousin who does this like it's her fucking job bro. She's got Seven kids from 5 different guys now and is living the dream. She makes more than I do in child support alone. Each baby daddy makes close to 100k a year if not more. Unfortunately, you just added to your soon to be Ex's payroll. I would get the fuck out of that in a heartbeat,…
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/21 07:52 PM
3

Check with an attorney first obviously, but see if you can end the cohabitation. There are some states that consider that "abandoning the home". I was able to move out without losing legal standing. Move in with a single buddy, or parents, or if you are extremely well off rent a small affordable apartment near by. Optuon#1 It is going to hurt the kids no matter what you do. Just consider what type you want them to go through. In this case sit them down and tell them mommy and daddy love them, bu…
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/21 07:37 PM
2

Definitely time to pull the plug my guy, I had the same epiphany with my Ex, everything I wanted to do she hated. I just new that if I'd stayed with her I'd never get be me.....maybe a version she wanted, but not the real me. It was like we came from different words at that point.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/21 06:17 PM
1

A lot of good comments in this thread. You will continue to feel it is a waste until you realize that you are so much more important then the relationship you had. You are the only one that you will truly spend every waking moment with. Take some time to appreciate yourself and look forward to all the things you can accomplish. Like everyone has been saying it was a good chapter, but the book is far from over. Good luck my guy
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/21 02:02 AM
3

If you are asking the question then it's time to go. After a mundane argument I had with my Ex, I could not stop thinking about how much more value I brought to the relationship. I saw everything at face value and I could not unsee it. No matter how much I thought about it. I couldn't put jack back in the box. I came home from work the next day, looked around my over priced home that I didn't even want in the first place with a whole new perspective. It was like I was a stranger in my own home. …
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/21 01:34 AM
6

First things first congrats my dude, and welcome to the club. The freedom is amazing isn't it. I've been divorced for a few years now and reading this thread was interesting. I forgot about all the dumb ass half done art projects and the shoes everywhere. The garage filled with someday projects, or the reject/ no longer the in thing junk that once sat in the house for some God awful reason. I still to this day find it hard to believe that I lived my life that way for so many years. Giving up my …
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/21 09:08 PM
1

Read these comments carefully Kings, There is a ton of good info on this thread for men in your position, these guys know what they are talking about and sound like they have been through the divorce wringer. I have been here and done all of this and got the bumper sticker as well. So here is my advice....hopefully she does not already have a plan in place. If you want things to work out and don't want a divorce your best bet is to take back your life first. Start doing things for you (just like…
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/21 02:49 AM
2

I couldn't agree more with most of this post. If you are looking for an actual answer to your question only you can answer that one. Your subconscious is at a struggle with your conscious mind and what is happening in reality is destroying the framework your mind had meticulously planned and constructed for you in your subconscious mind. It takes time for your brain to rewire and create your new eutopia. That being said some of these will help. I totally agree with #1 and #2. I do not have or us…
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/21 09:33 PM
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