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DesignerUpbeat5065 Archive

View 2 posts and 46 comments by DesignerUpbeat5065 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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10

What world do you live in? Parents can't ever leave their kid's side now? Really odd take man.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 05:11 AM
4

The kids are grown! What "obligation to family"? I think your question is a good one in the right context, but this ain't it. If it was for the sake of several young children, I could see a case being made. You're situation sounds more like he's getting back with the mom because she's so pathetic that he (and the adult children) feel bad.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 04:03 AM
9

What everybody else said, but I want to add that you didn't need to specify men in the title. Any person that does this is probably cheating and has been. By far it is more often the woman.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 11:12 PM
2

Do you know if he is in a state where it matters? In my state you can fuck around as much as you want and it doesn't matter one iota in court. Adultery is perfectly legal.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 09:35 AM
2

Whether or not she is talking shit about you, the only thing you can do, and the only healthy thing to do, is to move on. You also have to realize that this subreddit is full of super bitter men, we've all been left by our wives. I find that most of the guys on here are really really anti-women. And it's understandable. But, I don't think the perception is quite accurate. I don't understand why guys are saying 100% she's talking shit about you. Where does that come from? Because their exes talk …
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/24 01:51 PM
2

Exactly what I came to say. No one randomly deletes texts. Most people never delete any texts, ever.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 03:54 PM
15

You could have stopped after the second paragraph... When do people ever erase texts? Never... Unless they are cheating. Pretty cut and dry. Sorry dude. I advise you to do whatever it takes to move on.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 03:53 PM
9

There's no law that says you can't film her in public. Perfectly legal.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 06:44 PM
6

Wym "thoughts"? Probably most of us would kill for that scenario.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/24 02:15 AM
1

Thanks for the reply. I'm actually glad about the inheritance/parent gift thing not counting, as I have actually received some recently (hers is in the distant future, when her parents die). Thanks for the insight on the judge not necessarily being involved, and the fact that I should avoid trial. I feel like I have a much stronger case on all fronts, but we are still amicable as of now. Yeah, I'm 47, and I started this job only 12 years ago. Losing half the retirement is gonna hurt, but it is w…
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 03:28 PM
1

I'm curious, what state are you in? I of course am aware of judges historically leaning more towards the women's side. I like to think that's less of an issue these days, especially in California. But I don't really know what I'm talking about.
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 02:17 PM
6

Why are you taking the stbx out still? I mean, I did something similar a few times, but they were always for the kids birthday. And that has now ended, I don't really want to hang out with her in any context anymore. I strongly suggest you move that direction.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/24 12:55 PM
2

That's not quite what I meant... Those sound like women that are relationship material, which you're probably not ready for yet. I meant finding some people on tinder for some fun. Some light no strings attached dating. However it goes for you, I wish you luck.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 11:17 PM
4

It will get better. It happens in waves, non-linearly. I'm fully over mine now, took a good year though. I recommend trying to date if that is something you feel up to. Really helps.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 06:52 PM
1

Yes, it's a common colloquialism that is spelled "naught" (or sometimes "nought"). It means all for nothing. "Not" is a misspelling.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 03:32 PM
2

*naught Sincerely, Grammar Nazi
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 09:12 AM
3

We all have jobs, that's how.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 12:21 PM
3

"I made every payment on the vehicle." No, according to the law you both did. Everything that is yours is actually hers as well. My stbx racked up $25K + in debt without me knowing (on self improvement/pyramid schemes, etc.). I "lent" her the money to pay it off, every cent I had saved plus the last 5K I put on my card. Plan was for her to slowly pay it back (which was really to the family fund, not me personally, I'm not super controlling with the finances or anything.. and we have three kids).…
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 03:43 AM
4

Any kids? Honestly, ending it now rather than later may end up being a blessing. You're still really young. Hope she doesn't get half your money ... 10 months isn't long but I don't know the rules on that
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 01:26 AM
6

She's probably been on the dating sites for quite a while. Talking to several people at a time, but don't we all? I'm guessing somebody else asked her to make plans that she liked more than you.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 12:51 PM
6

I don't think domestic violence and protection orders are the norm...
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 12:50 PM
3

Okay, several red flags here. First, you're still having sex?!? That must be terribly hard on you, since you are still in love with her and she should be the one stopping the sex. Also, maybe I'm mistaken, but I don't believe Gray Rock has anything to do with your situation. I thought that's about only communicating like through email, and barely talking to them at all. It certainly doesn't mean seeing them in person, and most definitely doesn't mean living with them. It kind of sounds like mayb…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 09:25 PM
1

Underrated comment. IYKYK
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 09:23 AM
3

I'm in a similar boat, except with three kids. Very involved with them, moreso than their mother I would argue. So the hard times for me, is when they are all at her place, and I'm at home alone with nothing to do. But I have gf now, and as long as I'm occupied, I barely miss them (at least not until the end of the week approaches... I'm more than fine for the first several days without them). In fact, you may find yourself looking forward to the break. If you are finding yourself struggling whi…
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 07:37 PM
20

After years of marriage, these women really get the itch and think the grass is greener on the other side. Then for quite a lot of them, they realize they were dead wrong. And then they want to come crawling back, please don't take her back. If you do, she'll just leave you again and sleep with a bunch of other guys later down the road. She's gone dude. It resonated with me about her being your best friend, same with mine. But once that's seals been broken it's over.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 11:33 PM
1

They wouldn't be a stranger, they would be your girlfriend. This stranger is going to be the dude that your ex wife shacks up with.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 09:09 PM
3

It's really really hard, but listen to these guys. Remember that she did this, not you. It's going to affect the kids. Hugely. She cares more about herself. You can't stop it now, and I'm sorry you have to go through this too.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 11:25 AM
6

Yeah, the living together isn't gonna work man. I had the same delusion at first. Just realize it's you not really accepting it yet
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 11:17 AM
2

I can second what everyone else is saying as far as it will get better, and you will actually end up happier. But this is the one that really got me, I was shocked to read that you've already signed something. My wife left me over a year ago and I still haven't signed anything yet, seems like you guys are moving really really really fast.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 10:42 AM
1

And I understand and agree with what you're saying, in theory. But in reality, if you have your kids half the time, and you're dating somebody who you really like it's going to be really hard to just live half of your life completely without them. But if you're able to do that, kudos to you!
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 03:09 PM
10

Is this an advertisement for why you should use a lawyer? Even in the poorest states, you need roughly twice that to afford an apartment. So how are you paying your bills?
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 12:28 PM
3

Here's my take: I agree that she was not for sure already talking to this guy, I myself got left by my wife unexpectedly, and was happily dating someone less than 2 months later. It was a rebound fling, didn't last, but was fun. As for the 99% chance that it blows up, I doubt it's that high. But still pretty likely I would say. Just don't count on it, it's also possible that they end up staying together. Expecting someone to not introduce your kids for a year sounds great at the beginning but th…
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 12:14 PM
2

That's great advice, but have you met men in their 30s and 40s? What friends? 🤣 (Only half joking)
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:59 AM
1

I will also respectfully disagree. Sure, maybe most are like that. But there's plenty of women out there that just want a man to take care of and help. I know it sounds weird. But I've experienced it. You just have to keep sifting through them until you find the right one.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:57 AM
1

For what it's worth, I was on a couple apps for about 6 to 9 months before I didn't need them anymore. I never paid extra for anything. So it's not like it's required. It's like spending extra money on those free phone games. You don't need to spend the extra money, it just may be gives you some slight advantage.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:54 AM
1

I've heard that a lot of guys on the dating apps have pictures of themselves holding fish they just caught. Lol. I think that's maybe more equivalent to the dog licking your face.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:49 AM
2

Short AND awkward? Ooof
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:46 AM
1

Women on dating apps are looking for different things. Some are looking for a serious relationship, a lot more are just looking for a good time. The photos key you into that. If they're in a bar with drinks and their lady friends, they're looking to get fucked. If they're on the beach with their kids and a dog, they're looking for a relationship. It's not that complicated guys.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:43 AM
0

Lol
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:38 AM
2

But you have no problem with your gf helping to raise another woman's kids, huh?
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:38 AM
4

They are putting their kids in their photos, because they're looking for a partner in life. It's a way of communicating the fact that they are not just looking for a one night stand. I don't understand why that seems weird to you. You would be the stepdad. And you honestly think you'd be dating someone for over a year and not introduce your kids? I mean maybe... Seems really odd to me though. You don't think after four or five months of connecting with someone you wouldn't introduce them to your…
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:35 AM
8

Wait, you're saying this is the first woman you've dated since your wife? Um... Yeah I think it's definitely infatuation, on both sides. Hope it will last, but don't expect it to. Don't most of us feel like that with our first "new woman" after a long divorce? I know I did... And I don't even talk to her anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 09:37 PM
2

Thanks, I know... There are a lot of understandably bitter divorcees here. But the warnings are helpful too. Just glad that a few of you HAVE had good experiences with keeping it friendly. I will move forward cautiously.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/24 04:07 PM
1

Thanks for the reply. No it hasn't been discussed, she is just now starting to meet with a lawyer. I personally do not want reconciliation (anymore), but we are friendly and the "friendship" does seem to be important to her, moreso than to me. I'm in it for the kids, she actually wants to still have a friendship with me I think. I have a live in gf now, since before Xmas, she is still single and also struggles with mental health. I think she may regret leaving me, but that ship has sailed (and I…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/24 04:00 PM
2

Or just use Tinder for a hook up
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/24 09:38 PM
1

Or just use Tinder?
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/24 09:34 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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