DiningWithTheDonners Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	What's it like walking away from your kids? My brother, I understand your frustration. You said you "realized nothing but suffering was coming from this". You don't have to be a Buddhist to appreciate their belief that life IS suffering, that working to live within that suffering is where joy and enlightenment come from. So, the question from my original comment remains - are you doing everything in your power to keep a relationship with your child so they don't believe you just turned your back on them and walked away? Other side of the …	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/24 01:35 PM
3	Why are there no consequences for them? "If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle." Sun Tzu, The Art of War	/r/Divorce_Men	16/05/24 12:14 PM
4	What are the best ways to protect yourself in a divorce with two kids? Why has nobody stated the obvious?!? DOCUMENT. EVERYTHING. Get a notebook or create a Google form to keep track of any and every detail - you never know what's going to be important later on. Parenting time spent with the kids? Document it. Argument with the STBX? Document it. Kids comment about mommy's new boyfriend sleeping over? Document it. Courts view these types of records as generally accurate if they were made contemporaneously to the events documented. Keep track of specifics like the d…	/r/Divorce_Men	27/12/22 12:44 AM
0	What's it like walking away from your kids? Well then, I guess your opinions on this question about walking away from your children are pretty worthless. Thanks for trying to contribute something to a topic you know nothing about /s	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/22 02:23 PM
0	What's it like walking away from your kids? I didn't attack any man on this sub. To the contrary, I wish I could empower more of them to step up and stop ceding their rights as fathers and their dignity as men to any of the overbearing women in their life that they've had the misfortune of calling family. I'd include a lot of mothers, yourself included, in that category too. Guessing by your earlier statement "I raised four sons" that you think you did all the heavy lifting, their father's role was inconsequential? Only reason you probabl…	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/22 01:54 AM
1	What's it like walking away from your kids? Lady, I can tell that you're the kind who won't be happy until you hear exactly what you want. Been there, divorced that. I don't know the details of anybody else's situation but mine, so I can't give a perfect answer. I said improvise, adapt, and overcome. Find new ways to be involved to whatever extent possible. There are countless ways to show up for your kids but, at the end of the day, a parent still has to look in the mirror and decide if they did the absolute best they could.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/22 01:24 AM
1	What's it like walking away from your kids? Read my other comments in this thread. A man who wants to be involved as a father will find ways to do it that don't happen to fit the female-driven stereotype of the angry, violent, lazy man. Thanks for trying to reinforce that here though /s There are tons of ways to show up for your kids. People choose to curse the darkness instead of lighting a match. Like anything else in life, effort counts.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/22 12:38 AM
1	What's it like walking away from your kids? All due respect, but this is a sub for men...I mean, it's in the name and everything. If you want to dump your verbal vomit on other people this really isn't the place. FYI...some mother-in-laws suck too.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/22 12:32 AM
3	What's it like walking away from your kids? It's the same sad story that too many men share, every one of them alienated from their children. The kids lose, the fathers lose. The only one who gets what they want is the mother. My question is why give in and let the dirty bird win? Why walk away instead of improvising, adapting, and overcoming? Be a good person, set the right example and I guarantee kids will know who's there for them and who isn't. I would do absolutely anything for my children, wouldn't think for a second of abandoning t…	/r/Divorce_Men	25/05/22 11:12 PM
0	What's it like walking away from your kids? My dude, you've already answered your own question that come from single parent households What good comes to a child whose father walked out of their life? You want to be a father then you have to act like a man. I believe you're making excuses. Time to take a hard look in the mirror.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/05/22 09:18 PM
-2	What's it like walking away from your kids? Parents are supposed to do what's best for their kids, even if the children don't realize it until they're grown. If mommy is prioritizing her feelings over the children then they will see it for what it really is soon enough. When you give up and walk away you legitimize all the bad things mommy tells the kids you are.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/05/22 08:32 PM
3	Male or female lawyer "A good lawyer knows the law; a clever one takes the judge to lunch." - Mark Twain	/r/Divorce_Men	25/05/22 05:48 PM
-5	What's it like walking away from your kids? Custody or not, every man can find a way to step up. Lunch at school with the kids or helping with a classroom party? Do it. Volunteer to coach sports or lead activities they participate in? Do it. Sit front row at every recital or performance cheering your ass off? Do it. Having custody doesn't automatically mean that you're a better parent...the truly great parent is the one who shows up for their kids no matter what.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/05/22 05:44 PM
9	Divorce that won't end Isn't it wild how it all starts seeming like Monopoly money after a while? Once you get to a certain point, it's like the brain doesn't want to process the ugly reality of the number anymore.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/05/22 03:59 AM
3	Divorce that won't end I begged, borrowed, and stole to get it. After a certain point, my attorney just told me to do what I could when I could as far as payments went. Everything is documented and all of her delays and games will hopefully cost her in the end if the judge makes her pay some of my legal fees. I'm hoping it's enough to make a dent in what I owe.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/05/22 03:55 AM
7	Divorce that won't end It's a process. One day, when everything is finally done, I'm looking forward to finding this elusive inner peace people keep telling me about. Some women go after what they know hurts a father most - his children. False CPS allegations, protection order, financial fuck-fuck games...she threw it all at me. What she didn't realize was I would spend every penny and then some if it meant I was able to be a 50/50 parent to my kids. 100% worth it.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/05/22 03:50 AM
6	Divorce that won't end Perspective is everything my friend. My divorce was dragged out 3+ years and cost me well over six figures...if I don't spend another penny on anything but repaying the money I borrowed to cover all my lawyer fees then I should be free of that debt in few more years. Of course, I still need silly things like food, shelter, and clothes so it's probably going to take more than just a few years...	/r/Divorce_Men	10/05/22 02:25 AM
4	Holidays and gifts for your ex? It has nothing to do with your EX and everything to do with setting the right example for your children. My EX never encourages or helps them get gifts for me - birthdays, Father's Day, Christmas. I always make sure they get something for her. We made her Mother's Day gifts this year and that's a special memory I get to share with my kids. They might not see her selfish, resentful nature right now but the time WILL come when they do. Be the best father you can by showing them how to be good peop…	/r/Divorce_Men	01/05/22 06:53 PM
2	[NY] Can a father get a fair judgement in a custody case? I hear you. I'm 3+ years on and I still have my days of bitterness too. This stuff is personal and it hurts. Don't let anyone or anything keep you from making an effort with your kids. Fatherhood is a marathon and you have to play the long game. Don't give up on a relationship with your kids. Show your EX and the "system" that no matter what you are going to be the best father you can be. One day, those kids will appreciate how hard you fought for them.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/22 05:01 PM
2	[NY] Can a father get a fair judgement in a custody case? From one man to another, you have got to let that go. Keep holding on and it becomes the reason, the excuse you tell yourself and others for why you "couldn't" be a father to your kids. Use that energy to find ways to do something, anything you can to be involved in their lives. Set an example for them that rather than being destroyed by adversity it is possible to rise above it and make the best out of even the worst situations. More than that, holding on to all the anger and resentment keeps y…	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/22 04:49 PM
2	[NY] Can a father get a fair judgement in a custody case? Name one assumption I've made? Fact is that you said fathers should walk away from their children and give up their parental rights. Doesn't take an omnipotent genius to figure out you're a bitter man who hasn't dealt with all his anger and resentment yet. If you step in a pile of dog shit, do you stop to smell your shoe or do you wipe it off and keep walking?	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/22 04:37 PM
3	[NY] Can a father get a fair judgement in a custody case? You advocated forgetting about the children and giving up parental rights...that is 100% your choice. Not the "system". Not your EX. Yours. Looks like you're pretty active in certain proselytizing subs so you clearly have no issues with tales of grown men lamenting why their fathers would abandon them in their hour of need. That book is such a cherry pickers delight. Seems like you're conveniently ignoring a few facts of your own and that's your problem.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/22 04:26 PM
2	[NY] Can a father get a fair judgement in a custody case? Are you talking about the system where some fathers say "Just forget about the children...relinquish parental rights"? You're right, that is absolutely disgusting. Guessing you don't have children or you do but you're little more than a sperm donor to them...either way, you've got no business handing out advice to another man that clearly loves his kid.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/22 04:12 PM
2	Considering leaving, but I was unfortunately born with testicles Can you explain the SS benefits comment more?	/r/Divorce_Men	15/12/21 10:26 PM
2	Michigan: found out spouse is having sexual relations with a man during our pendency period Out of curiosity, what would the potential impact be if she did bring the dude home to meet the kid?	/r/Divorce_Men	21/09/21 01:43 PM