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DivorceCoachGio Archive

View 4 posts and 55 comments by DivorceCoachGio on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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14

The fact that you’ve made a friend and are enjoying gigs and theme parks is likely a huge part of why she hit the wall. She expected you to stay distraught while she moved on. Seeing you at peace and enjoying life without her has shifted the power dynamic. If you abandon your new life the moment she shows distress, you lose the progress you've made.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 08:24 AM
3

When the routine disappeared. It sounds small, but that structure was doing a lot of identity work for me. Without it, I felt kind of… undefined for a while.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 09:27 AM
8

Pay attention when communication dies, resentment builds, and peace feels easier alone. If effort becomes one-sided, that’s usually the real warning sign.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 09:19 AM
1

Kinda like some people were taught not to say no.
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/26 09:25 PM
7

It’s not that she died, it’s that your reality changed faster than your mind could process.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/26 05:41 PM
13

Some dads choose it because of work schedules, distance, or stability for the kids’ school routine. Not always about wanting less time.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/26 10:08 PM
13

Intimacy is a foundational box. If it’s not there, you’re just settling for another mismatch.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 12:50 AM
10

Since you gave her permission to just enjoy the final year, her guilt has been replaced by relief. She can be nice now because the pressure to fix the marriage is gone.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 12:23 AM
2

What state? I work with attorneys all over Canada and the US…
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 03:09 AM
8

26 years is a Hall of Fame run. If you’re enjoying the peace, own it! Solo life isn't giving up, it's a victory lap. Your time, your rules.
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/26 01:40 PM
6

I kept moving at first, then the grief hit later. I didn’t celebrate. I had to slow down, feel it, and rebuild intentionally, that’s what finally helped me move forward.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 07:58 PM
0

I found it all and more !!
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/26 08:57 PM
3

And it marks the beginning of a new chapter!
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/26 08:18 PM
10

Relief and sadness can exist together and it's really common.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/26 06:06 PM
2

Dogs have a way of pulling us back into the present, no judgment, just love and need. You will be fine, trust me!
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/26 02:02 PM
2

You have every right to feel angry, hurt, and betrayed. This was a misunderstanding that was intentionally shaped by someone else, and you’ve been punished for it with silence, pain, and distance. I am so sorry you went through all this.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 06:47 PM
3

You’re grieving, but your survival instincts, protecting the house and assets, are spot on. Things get better with time, don't forget that! As at now, try to protect your peace.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 05:17 PM
3

You are being a protector at its best! Choosing your children's stability over a toxic cycle isn't being impatient.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 04:59 PM
3

Totally get it. At this stage, friendship doesn’t magically appear, you have to chase it. Try meetup groups, co-ed sports, running clubs, weekend workshops, or even local hobby classes. Small consistent efforts pay off more than waiting for invites.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 08:59 PM
9

It’s common to feel relationship burnout after a divorce. You’re mourning the picture-perfect dream while enjoying your new freedom. Take time to heal, don't rush into a choice today.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 01:30 PM
8

You’ve already done the right thing. Those recordings are your objective truth. They aren't just for a judge; they are for you, to remind you that you aren't "crazy" when she tries to gaslight you later. You need a coach, a therapist, or a solid group of men who understand high-conflict personalities. You cannot process a "breakdown" while still being actively broken down by someone else.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 12:21 PM
2

What does your therapist say? Outside of your therapist, do you have anyone to talk to? For me, the gym saved my life. Healthiest lifestyle possible. You can be alone. You can build the life you want. Just have to figure it out. Once you do, the sun shines again. Trust me. I've been there and more than once...
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/25 09:59 PM
1

Ask your attorney. Now.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/25 09:57 PM
2

If you've spent the night, you've crossed the barrier already.
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/25 02:32 PM
2

Coached sports for 25 years. Loved it.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/25 07:25 PM
5

Not everyone in your circle of friends should be asked for advice. Many will just project their own insecurities onto you. A true friend will listen, challenge, not judge and help you get to where you need to be. Choose carefully. If none fit the bill, seek advice elsewhere.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/25 01:17 PM
5

Sadly, I know many who 'follow' that code but don't. It's a sick industry where only few are true...
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/25 11:15 AM
2

Sadly, you know as well as I do, there are so many fakes out there that I am sure most don't understand the word ethics...
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/25 11:07 AM
10

As a Divorce Coach, let me say this. 1. Your post is missing a ton of info to make any type of judgement. 2. A Divorce Coach should be guiding their client to complete their marriage without judgement. 3. Divorce Coaches are NOT certified, IN ANY WAY, without exception, to use the term Narcissist as part of their coaching. 4. See point #3. 5. See point #3 again.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/25 10:07 AM
1

Ask a friend if you could join their plans If you have a few friends in the same position, invite people over Last year, at Christmas, my best friend had a 'relationship orphan' Christmas dinner. Most fun I had in a while then...
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/25 02:47 PM
2

Answering you now.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/25 02:10 PM
3

Planning, Planning and PLANNING. The more prepared you are, the better things will go and the less expensive things will be. Getting a good, better, best financial picture will be a huge help. Mediation can save you tons. There is a ton that you can do at a low cost to get you as ready as possible. I recently saved a client about 5K in legal fees just by getting them ready for the beginning of their divorce process. It's all in the planning and strategy.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/25 01:58 PM
6

Congratulations!
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/25 02:53 PM
8

- Plan. Get yourself ready. - Start attorney scouting. - Focus on you. Clean eating, gym. - Build your circle of trust. You got this.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 02:35 PM
7

No. No. and No.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 02:33 PM
2

People who got me through my divorce: - My best friend. No shame. Just being able to talk over a shot or two of Whisky. I asked him if he'd be there for me and there was no hesitation. - A Coach. Yes, I am a divorce coach but, during my divorce, I followed my own advice, and spoke with a Divorce Coach. - Hypnotherapist. 2 sessions with a hypno did me a lot of good. - Dr. Weights - Ok, not a real person but going to the gym and unloading everything into the weights.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 02:33 PM
1

Lawyer. Now.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/25 10:13 PM
1

Lots of missing info. Start scouting attorneys and get some consults. Based on your story and location, they'll tell you what you need to hear.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/25 03:53 PM
1

I still reco an attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/25 10:01 PM
1

Love this!
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/25 02:55 PM
1

Thanks! I moisturize twice a day!
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/25 01:54 PM
2

You are right but you should still be able to notice...
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 09:59 PM
1

You are doing the right thing by stopping dating. You need to heal. What are you doing to help your mental health?
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 07:29 PM
4

Men don't take the time to see the signs...
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 12:16 PM
1

Hire an attorney. Plan. Get your ducks in a row.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/25 11:32 PM
5

Marriage is love. Divorce is a business. The second she says she is not happy, she starts picturing life without you. The clock is ticking. Action is needed to fix things. 'Like usual, I give her some space' Sounds like major communication issues... Get an attorney. Quick.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/25 11:28 PM
1

Got divorced at 31 and 44. Started my business at 39. I have a son in shared custody. You can make it happen with a solid plan. I've helped many do the same.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/25 11:23 PM
1

Hire an attorney on a consultation basis to review the document and make sure that you are protected. If, for whatever reason, the attorney sees red flags, you can always upgrade to full representation.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/25 11:18 PM
1

Depends. Can be a mix. Did you have a clear plan going into this and are you and your lawyer in agreement over strategy?
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/25 04:18 PM
12

Nope. She made her bed, now she can lie in it. I go to bed knowing I did all I could. Not perfectly. But I did all I could. She can live her life. I've got mine. No time to look at the past, I'm not headed in that direction.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/25 04:08 PM
2

What you went through is absolutely NORMAL. You didn't take time to heal. Did she provide emotional support? Absolutely. Did it give you a false sense of security? Absolutely. Focus on your job and your kids but most of all... focus on YOU!!!!! You need to heal, understand your value, determine what you want, set your boundaries and then dip your toe in the dating waters again. It all boils down to communication.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/25 04:02 PM
3

What kind of therapists have you spoken to? I reco one that specializes in trauma bond and emotional abuse.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/25 10:13 PM
1

As detailed as your post is, there is still a lot that has to come into consideration, including where you are located and what the laws are there. Divorce Strategy is a big part of what I do with my clients, overseeing everything from division of assets, funds and then custody, child support and more. You need a solid plan covering all angles.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/25 09:43 PM
5

Why is the other guy the loser when it was HER decision to betray you? Also, you are giving her an intense amount of power. You are letting her live rent free in your head. There's no winning. 'I'll have a hotter b*tch' makes so many alarm bells. You're hurt. Hurt people hurt people. You need to heal brother.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/25 05:27 PM
1

Boundaries and knowing what you want. This is what gets you through. Have you set boundaries with your ex? How did she see the pic? Do you know what you want? If you are unsure, you'll never have stability and always wait for the other shoe to drop.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/25 04:22 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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