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Doubledolla Archive

View 2 posts and 195 comments by Doubledolla on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Great analogy!
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 10:44 PM
9

Bye Felisha.... the sooner you actually accept what's happening and move towards separation/divorce the better you will be. Its a hard choice and reality but once you respect yourself and focus on yourself not what she's doing the better off you will be. Be strong and realistic about whats actually happening.
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/25 01:13 AM
2

Find out what state law is and hold to it..... its really that simple. They can ask all they want. No, is the answer unless it is less than what the law state for separation states. Lawyers can waste a lot of money getting to that fine point of stated law vs wants.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/25 05:32 PM
1

Look up what rules are in Maryland. Just go by the calculator. Once you get a number just offer her to buy that portion out for a small discount so you don't have to keep contact with her. That's the only reason not to really is that you'd have to have ties to her over a period of time regardless of how small. No kids, no reason to keep her tied to your life after the paperwork and final decree. May your future be bright.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/25 03:59 PM
11

She is not the woman you married. She is in her " live her best life mode" and it doesn't include you. Be diligent behind the scenes as she will change on a whim about everything if she feels like shes losing control of the situation. You said she makes way more than you..... you get spousal support and child support just like a wife would if roles were reversed. You get 1/2 the retirement fund since marriage just like a woman would if roles were reversed. Search this board and consume as much k…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/25 09:15 PM
6

Focus on that last sentence and live forward. Don't waste another second on her. Don't project who you want her to be as she's shown you who she is...... and that's not changing anytime soon. Put your love and effort into yourself and your daughter. That you can control.
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/25 04:49 PM
8

Wise words
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/25 10:41 PM
1

No is the answer. Cut all these connections and responsibilities especially financially and be the best father and person you can be. They will take every inch you give them. Start setting boundaries now!
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/25 11:37 PM
12

This is a tribute to the power of choice. Control what you can control. You didn't cheat and end the marriage, but you do get to choose how to live from that point forward. Easier said than done, but the sooner one realizes that they are in control of their future, the sooner it begins. Happy for you OP!
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/25 05:28 PM
2

Target
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 07:49 PM
2

Pick a day and see if she'll meet you down at the court house...... split the cost and get on with your life. Limbo is just like purgatory but you have a choice in outcome. Choose you and your bright future. Good luck sir!
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 05:51 PM
2

Auidoslave: What you are
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 04:58 AM
4

I controlled what I could control. It wasn't my choice .....from that point of acceptance it was what am I going to do for myself, my kids, and our future. Seemed she just thought that because she wanted this or that that she was entitled to it. NOPE. Broke it down as to what the realities are and what the state law said.... made it easier to remove those "feelings". When I started out whenever we were going to dicuss I would start with an outline of reality (print out what the state says about …
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 06:13 PM
4

It's a business negotiation now...... remove feelings and emotions. Easier said than done but does help when entering into conversations/ negotiations with stbx starting with that mind set
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 05:48 PM
5

" The lesson" is something that men starting the process should have knowledge of. It's a grueling tale but when your actions are pure you shall stand tall and be able to watch the dumpster fire from a distance. Happy for you OP
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:43 PM
7

Why involve a third party or more (Government/lawyers) into a 2 person agreement. Yeah everything's all good, until it's not. Now more people and more money are involved to uninvolve someone in your life. I don't even see complete co habitation let alone marriage in the future. Sure shared expenses are nice but at what expense when shit hits the fan because BBT (B!tchs be trippin).
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 03:34 PM
3

My dude..... what she wants vs what she is entitled to are 2 totally different things. Educate yourself on your state laws regarding this. Usually 50/50 of current assets and debts. That would also include that loan that you just took out, she's 50% liable for that debt as well. You're in a much better position than you think. Really comes down to can you be a 50% provider for care of your children. That will determine a lot on how much $ you will have to pay for child support. Good luck. Be a g…
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 04:47 PM
9

She wants you to be plan b while she plays the field.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 04:48 PM
3

YOU are thier home my man. Yes it's easy to get sentimental on the family house and all the previous memories. Being present and involved is what they need. Stay consistent and take every chance you have to spend with them as they will be grown before you know it. Don't get to stuck on these labels...going home vs dads house. Dad is home not the wall that hold him.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/24 07:46 PM
4

Def no kids. I'd be careful. Woman will go through incredible lengths to get what they want and not care about the consequences. If you are still having intercouse regularly I'd use a condom because she may lapse on birth control without your consent or knowledge. Good luck. Not all things work out. Love is a choice not a given. Also you've stated 5 weeks.... she may act differently for 5 weeks only to turn later. Give the attention the relationship needs but do not extend yourself beyond what y…
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/24 05:03 PM
2

They will feel like that if you are not consistently present. No amount of phone calls or packages will hold in place of that. If you are not consistent with presence and engaged they will disown you and you both will feel abandoned. Really hard to come back from. On your death bed it'd be losing your kids as your most regretful thing I'd imagine.......
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/24 12:08 AM
3

If it's kid focused all good. Seems more to it than that though.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 06:01 PM
6

You feel uncomfortable about it because for you it's not right and feels like shes going outside the relationship even if she isn't physically cheating. People talk about emotional affairs all the time being cause for turbulence or break ups. The ex husband probably also doesn't have many friends or hobbies and she's his focus obviously. What does his wife think about this? You said he'd get back with your girl in a heartbeat so there's obviously a reason he's devoting so much time to her....kee…
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 01:42 PM
3

Run it by her see how the conversation goes.....?
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 06:31 AM
1

I think many of us had those same feeling the instant it happened and we heard those words. Truth is you will survive and thrive. It will be an hour at a time then a day at a time etc.... but yes you will come out better after this. It doesn't feel like it yet but yes you will. Definitely be physically active as much as you can through this as it will help curb all the emotions and bring clarity to your thoughts. File now...... see if you can ask her to agree to take on her debt before she start…
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/24 02:03 PM
6

He'll to the no f'n way. These chicks are nuts. Soooo I'm gonna ruin everything you/we've worked for. Throw your vows aside and stomp on your heart. Give zero fucks about how it affects the kids and take away thier home, your home. Be a total psycho the entire time and fuck half the planet just to say I thought we'd get back together......... Hard pass on that. The nerve of these ladies is just out of this world to even think that it's possible. Enjoy your new life OP w/o that hot mess
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 04:40 AM
5

You'll never get the answers or an apology. Best to not give her any space in your mind as it's just wasted time and energy.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 03:13 PM
1

Good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 01:40 PM
3

She's already shown you who she is....... and that's not a person you will be a le to fully trust. Just by saying you're uncomfortable with her current work situation you'd be walking into a bad situation. Trust you gut. Don't do it. Focus energy on you kiddos and YOUR new future.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 04:24 PM
3

100%
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 02:36 PM
6

That about sums it up. You will never get a realistic answer or apology for their behavior. Chin up be strong and don't search for answers that don't exist.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 02:35 PM
11

I moved all pics that included her into a folder that's says do not open. For (daughtes name). Just so my daughter could have them later when she is older. They are part of her life and would be cherished by her.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/24 05:40 PM
3

Only referencing the people that I know that enterend counseling, not a general population census.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/24 11:01 PM
3

I have yet to have any friends enter counseling either as individuals or couples and not divorce. Also the female 90% of the time has been exposed as a cheater before the divorce or after. If not exposed as a cheater they become a flouzy shortly after and makes "whorable" decisions while living thier best life and finding themselves. It's batting a 100% of all the people who have entered counseling while married have gotten a divorce out of the people I know. None have come out saying it saved t…
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/24 03:23 PM
3

Good bye and good riddance. Turn up the tunes and get to work chucking all the left behind shit. It's a process and can be emotional but sooooo awesome to know she's not your problem anymore. She'll ask where's xyz and the answer is gone to the dump with all the other shit you left behind. It's a chance to learn from the relationship and start anew. All my friends now just stop by and say what's up and hang like the old days. They just hated her bitchy energy. Things get better my man. You get t…
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 03:39 PM
1

Also payment history...... if there were loans then there would be a history of payments. Right? Otherwise, I just made up BS
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 03:54 AM
4

Stay strong, stand your ground, you got this. Wintertime doesn't help either because you're kind of stuck inside and stuck inside the feelings as well. Try to get outside and get some sunshine on your face it helps.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 04:02 PM
1

Good luck with all!
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 03:52 AM
2

On the other side you also get 5 in a row too...... allows time to really set up and prepare for them and get all the things done and out of the way so your time is focused on them instead of running around with your head cut off. Also makes it easier to schedule vacations because you have the days sequentially together already. I found it works for us it's not for everyone.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 03:27 AM
2

Yeah and the kids know where they will be on certain days no matter what. Def makes it easier for them..... me too. I know if it's Mon or Tues I've got my kiddos rain or shine.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 03:00 AM
4

Hard pass for so many reasons. 9 days away from your kids..... uh no. If you want to be their father you should stand up and accept nothing less than 50/50. Ours is I'm every Mon/Tues her every Weds/Thurs and then alternate every Fri/Sat/Sun. Allows for no direct transfers other than the occasional outliers. All others are me drop off at school and her pick up and vis versa. Don't have to see the ex which helps. 99% if you want to see your kids you get to in today's court unless proven unworthy.…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 07:20 PM
13

Bat sh!t crazy. Have no idea what reality they live in. Ex and I would have a conversation then within a day it's like it never happened and things agreed upon were never discussed.....now I'm trying ruin her. Um what? It was so confusing until you just turn it off and realize they are lost and nuts and it's not worth your time and energy. Things got better once I chose to detach from the crazy. You want a divorce you got it. Bye!
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 06:11 PM
8

Dude she's looking for an out and you're her only hope. Not a chance man. She's already looking for her next victim again before she's done with the last failed shit show. She's showing you who she is. You'd be in the same situation if you let her back into your life again. Save yourself the time and emotion turmoil the children would also go through and pass on that offer........ if she settled things up and finalized the divorce with the ex,had her own place, LOTS of counseling, and after a fe…
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 05:39 PM
1

You can't change the past but you can control how you conduct yourself from today forward.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 11:59 PM
5

Um what kind of car are we talking about........ I mean I like cars...... and I'm sentamenal too. Maybe it works out that you can get her back when your ready.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 05:46 AM
2

My experience is that any woman that has brought up divorce has been thinking about it for a minimum of 6 months and that's when they made the choice. Now she's going to get a job so she doesn't need to rely on you for financial security. She's distancing herself little by little and you've got to accept what's happening. Don't downplay any of this. It will only make it worse. I would say to offer going to counseling and see what her response is. If she's not willing to set aside time for that t…
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 11:27 PM
5

The forms are available online via state website. It outlines spousal support based on yrs married and such. Also what child support would be if you know the income numbers. You are also entitled to 50% of marital debt. Something to keep in mind. Also 50% of her 401k stocks or other investments made during marriage. Also 50 of savings accrued during marriage. And vis versa. 50/50. Really you should settle for nothing less. That is what the court would decide if all documents have been provided. …
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 10:15 PM
2

Just bring an long enough HDMI cable and have at it
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/24 08:17 PM
6

This
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/23 05:54 PM
6

He's got a five yr plan..... what is it? Don't die🤣 This is totally the right place to come my man. This is something that a lot of us quietly deal with on our own. I'm in the same boat with this sh!t ass behavior. Last night even at daughter's Xmas singing thing for school she texted and said there are seats over by her and her parents........ get bent b!tch. No I want nothing to do with you and the only reason you exist in my life is because we have kids. I get the same things like we are frie…
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/23 05:52 PM
2

Unfortunately something we had to learn this way. They really become different people that you cannot recognize. Keep up the self work and improvement. Don't get back into being complacent about the things we know we need to address. Rock on brotha🤘
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 05:56 PM
4

People are like the weather. You can't control it or accurately predict it. You just get to deal with it. Accept that it's out of your control and move forward. She will not take accountability and you shouldnt waste your time wondering why it rained. Be happy for the clarity it has brought you. Put your energy into the future endeavors but learn from the past and bring a jacket because it might rain again
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 05:17 PM
1

Absolutely not. You can get through all the basics of the separation based on local law available via state website. Separation of property and finances..... how to split home by out vs sell. See what spousal support and child support payments look like. All avaliable le online and figure all this out and present it to her as fact..... 50/50 kids yadda yadda. That's usually the basics of separation and it helps to present that to her before lawyers. Lawyers at the end or a lawyer shared....... f…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 06:48 PM
7

This. I went through this last year same time frame. Nope, I'm not gonna fake a freaking soul crushing, family destroying, disrespectful act by her. I tried to make sure that was her choice. Talked and she said that's what she wants........ had a tee time with some friends that day and bought a bed right after. Came home moved our now broken vowed marital bed into the guest room and told her she can stay in there until the house sells. Blew her shit up. That's what you wanted. I'm just getting i…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 06:35 PM
7

I've often found that they seem to live in a different reality. Their wants are how they perceive the law and feel justified in that nonsense. Then they get the reality check of what is actually going to happen and double down on irrational behavior...... Disgusting.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 06:56 PM
10

Having friends just stop by for no reason. So many people did not like her or her presence and just stayed away. Almost instantly, all my friends would stop by for no reason and its still that way. So much better on the other side.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 06:04 AM
3

I'd say this depends on the "loan". Do you want to share in the repayment? If she did not disclose it..... why bring it up if it will come from your share of split assests?
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/23 05:36 PM
4

We feel for you. Imense emotion and pain. Nothing you could have done my man. She chose this. You just get to finish it on your terms. File. Don't wait for the future, you have to accept it and move forward. She'll try to blame you..... Don't be coy when someone asks "Why are you breaking up"...... shes a cheater, simple answer. It's better on the otherside. Don't wait it will only tear at you and prolong the inevitable. Give her what she wants and Grey rock her. She obviously can't be trusted. …
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/23 02:11 PM
5

This⬆️
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/23 01:45 PM
3

Do not move out!!!
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/23 02:53 AM
2

This is the reality and we'll stated. You can't reason with what was and your role. She broke the moral contract and you got the short end of the stick. Nothing you could have done really...... she's a horrible person. Control the things you can control now. It's gonna be rough but focus on a being the best you, you can be and put your energy towards the kids and moving forward. Trying to make sense of the past is wasted energy.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/23 04:12 AM
11

Been there done that. Man, she doesn't want you there......... it's her family that will never change. Get used to it now because that's your future. Sorry to be so blunt but the writing is on the wall when they start acting like that. Especially with her trying to save face in front of the kids. You have to change your thinking to what your future looks like without her. This Xmas will be brutal especially if you think it's going to be anything different than what it already is. Save your $ and…
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/23 02:26 AM
16

Seriously, when the divorce started I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone. We'd have a conversation, and within hours, it was like it never happened or the main points that were agreed upon are now up in the air. I had to reality check myself multiple times.
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/23 08:28 PM
3

Grey rock her if you are not already. She chose her path. Offer to take your child more to get more time with her. Ive been taking my daughter golfing with me since she was little and she is part of the crew. Knows all the rules and gets to play and drive the cart. She's an awesome lil caddy. Helps pull the cart around and brings clubs to people. Don't focus on her playing so much as just learning how it all works. Kudos on finding "your" life. Rock on brotha!
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/23 11:49 PM
1

Start the process of separation now while she's in her I want someone else fog. I was in a similar situation, and she's gone bro. Hate to say it, but she's already broken the bond and there's really no turning back. File the paperwork and grey rock her. Talk to her about only the things that need to be talked about regarding kids, separation, funds dispersion. She will want to be "friends" and say I'll always love you yadda yadda. Nope don't fall for it. Keep your wits about yourself through the…
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/23 05:44 PM
4

That guy has the best analogies in the video
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/23 04:17 PM
1

She's already gone. Hate to tell you. Instead of wallowing and wondering use the energy to better yourself and focus on moving on without her. She filed...... that's a huge step and a clear sign of her intentions. She's been in that mind set far longer than you can imagine. Get the divorce done as soon and as clean as possible. Don't play her games. Don't fight or react to her bullshit. Give her what she wants and move on with your life. It hurts now but the sooner you look into yourself and put…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/23 02:48 PM
2

It is amazing how the ex can get even scummier than you thought possible at the beginning of the separation. Heartless souls. I too found out more than I could have thought possible towards the end of the divorce. Her new ex.... reached out and told me how she'd done this or that with screen shots from her not just his words. I'd stay away from trying to get more info or more detail as it were. Can't un hear it and it won't change the current situation. It actually just validates moving on and g…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/23 02:23 PM
3

Be the best you. For you and your kids....... seriously when your in it it's a bag of dicks. In hind sight it's a blip that led to your beautiful future. My ex did alot of what your are living and the best way is to not engage. You want/miss the image in your head of what it was,not what it is. She's done lost her mind and there's no coming back bro. Get through this without having regrets on your choices and don't engage in BS. You will get through this. She's not the woman you fell in love wit…
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/23 08:45 PM
9

Separate rooms first off while in the same house. Go get a new bed. Then grey rock her. If it's not about the kids or separating house/finances there is no conversation to be had. She made her choice and it's not you. Don't give her any attention. Compose yourself and don't react to her BS.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/23 08:17 PM
1

Be stoic and control the things you CAN control. Being present in the moment and not reacting to her BS is key. Having been there I can look back without remorse and not regret how I handled myself...... her not so much. Stay strong brother it does get better.
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/23 06:40 PM
1

That anniversary is not one that would apply to the woman she is now. Don't give it any energy. Use that energy to better yourself and your future. Living in the past and dwelling will only hold you back. The future is bright. Focus on that
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/23 01:08 PM
3

Nope. Can't trust her as a wife, how the heck could you trust her to be your "friend"..... she betrayed you to the fullest magnitude. Let her time with the kids be just that. Your time is yours. There will be those things that you go to that are combined like school, sport functions but you don't have to go together or sit next to her. Just be cordial, but heck to the no on letting her be part of your life. She probably is realizing she lost a trusting friend who actually cared about her and als…
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 07:42 PM
3

Unfortunately. 2nd time was just common law but had to divorce because of all the legalities. Way better place now. Hate only seeing my little lady 1/2 time but I make it count.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 10:31 PM
9

Unfortunately speaking from experience...... NO! Blamed it on so many things one being post pardom. My little girl was 1.5 and all I wanted to do was be with her. Her son that I had raised since 2.5 yrs was still coming to my house once a week he was 11 at the time. All I wanted was them really. She seemed like she had changed. Fast forward 8 yrs later again with all the same sh!t. We've grown apart, I'll always love you, blah blah blah. Tear the family apart AGAIN. Well turns out both times she…
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 10:19 PM
1

If you don't want more kids then yes it's a good choice. I was just about to do it....... cost $500 approx. Had it scheduled and then met a woman that had a hysterectomy...... did have to but was definitely going to.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 02:22 PM
10

This 100. Then didn't want to go to counseling anymore. Hated being seen for what she is and held accountable for her actions from an qualified outside party.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 02:02 PM
11

Veruca Salt syndrome. Hard work, communication, team work, health eating, exercise........ nope I want it now. Fake woman ( 40yrs old +- 4 yrs)are everywhere now and a dime a dozen. Falling into this same recipe for destroying family's. Recognize this. Tik tok minded, instant gratification, weak foundation having ho@$. Stay clear felllas
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/23 02:54 AM
2

Mine had more of a Veruca Salt approach. Working out would require...... well work. So 2 rounds of lipo and some high end fat drugs. I of course told her she was beautiful and we didn't have to do it this way. I was told it's not for you it's for me. Instant gratification for that one. But I want it now daddy. In hindsight, I should have seen the writing on the wall.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/23 01:32 AM
1

Unfortunately you can't make that choice to be happy for her or to choose to love you. People are like the weather you can't control it you just get to deal with it.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 02:56 AM
5

It would seem that men trying to get the other to marriage counseling and they won't go is usually they've already crossed the threshold of infidelity and don't want it to come out. She's gone. File and move on to the new life. It's sucks you're not a failure it takes 2 people to make it work. At first it's painful but as the new normal and routine starts its so refreshing to be free of someone's negativity. Start it now waste no time. Be cordial but don't concede anything based on fairytale wan…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 10:04 PM
6

Time, patience, and love. It does get better. They are going through thier own grieving process just as you did and they haven't had as much time as you to process and be in thier new reality. As parents one of the worst things is to see your child hurting emotionally. Especially when in your eyes it's an easy fix to show love and attention to your child. She's in "her" mode where she just wants what she wants and she wants it now. Control the things you can control in your space on your time. I…
/r/Divorce_Men10/08/23 05:21 PM
0

If she doesn't want to work on the relationship you should go get a new bed, move the old marital bed into another room and tell her that's hers now...... don't ask her just start asserting yourself now. The new you starts now!
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 04:39 PM
1

Yep. Go back to YOUR home. If she needs space let her go somewhere else. Likely when they say that they have already made the decision. See how she would feel about marriage counseling or a couples counseling trip...... you'll likey get your answer right then and there. Unfortunately, she's like most of the ladies on the other end of the thread and have already left months ago and just now brought it to your attention. Divorce is brutal so try as hard as you can if that's what you want but also …
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 04:33 PM
4

Ahhh dude that was and is my new life. It's so refreshing to be loved in your language. Start now as the clock is ticking. No amount of effort was enough with the ex and with the current woman life is so much better. My efforts are appreciated and she approaches me and genuinely looks me in the eye with love. It still feels surreal to have tried so hard for so long. If given a blank piece of paper I couldn't have written out a wish list of all the wonderful things I'd want in a woman that this w…
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 04:43 PM
6

Just because you had to move out doesn't mean she "gets" the house. All assets will be split 50 50 in the end and then you will pay child support and maintenance there after. She essentially just gets to live there until the division of assets unless you guys come to a different agreement. She will try to take it all but in reality it's 50/50 even if you made and paid all the $. If you owned your house before she came into your life you get the value/equity before that point and the rest is 50/5…
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 03:41 PM
0

That's probably a better question for your lawyer. Realistically, you have to have a place for you and your kids...... They need their dad regardless of how soul sucking that woman is.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 03:37 PM
3

You are in for a long ride my friend especially if this is how it's starting. Yes your gonna have to pay out the kiester and yes she is going to try to ruin you. Stick up for yourself and don't be a push over. At the same time you have to accept that most of the things you have worked for are long gone and you get to start over without that miserable witch. Take it slow one thing Ata time as when to catastrophtise the whole entirety of it all and future think negatively it will consume you. Focu…
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 03:04 PM
2

Sounds like it's basically all worked out and all you got to do is file the paperwork. Sounds like you already prioritize your child and time with them. Future is bright and keep that focus forward.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/23 05:42 PM
3

Run!!!!! Get out now. You are not her ticket to happiness that's found within her. Seems like you value you place in life and have a rooted personality and perspective. Don't reach and try to save this one. She will ruin all you have worked for and nothing will ever be enough for her. Get out while you have a chance and minimize the damage.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 04:30 PM
10

Instagram and all the socials. I believe they sit and search just to see the 1% of everyone's best lives and assume that it's thier 100% reality. It's all just clear blue waters and sky over here..... so they burn everyone's life down only to find that it's actually 1% of what they thought it would be
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/23 07:49 PM
6

Fear of facing accountability
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/23 07:46 PM
1

Do this NOW!
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/23 01:18 PM
2

Get a lawyer and get her to sign everything now before she starts to actually get a sense of what she is doing. Right now she's in a relationship with some else and nothing matters in that old life. Get it done and signed before she comes out of the fog. Like right now!!
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/23 01:08 PM
5

Go find yourself a California girl and don't look back.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 06:47 PM
1

It will probably be a fight because it does not benefit only her. We do set days during the week I get every Mon/Tues she gets every Weds /Thurs and then we rotate weekends Fri/Sat/Sun. There are many different options for 50/50 custody. Week on week off etc. This one just allows for consistency during the week and not such huge time gaps before you get to see them. Good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 05:14 PM
2

My house is now basically spotless and in better shape than when she was there and had cleaners coming weekly.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 03:52 PM
1

I made it a point to regularly check in with her and ask if there is anything she needed/wanted or how things are going. No everything is great and you're amazing........ I want a divorce and ive felt this way for a while. Um what the actual f#*ck OMG no words can describe that feeling. Such disgusting selfish behavior that they've somehow rationalized and now thier the victim because you should have known.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 03:42 PM
2

Classic
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 03:32 PM
2

He's got a 5yr plan....... what is it- Don't die.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 03:16 PM
5

She left you long before she brought it up. It's easy to say amicable on her end....... until you stick up for your then she plays the victim. Stay in the house get everything in writing. Everything! Regardless if you do want it to end some what peacefully especially if there are children involved there is a lot of legal language that needs to be part of the final separation paperwork. Things like first right of refusal for the kids. That's where she can't pawn them off to her family or friends …
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 02:36 PM
3

Fucking beautiful!
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/23 04:20 AM
2

You got that right. Its pointless to try and get answers. The woman you knew and married is long gone. She changed and left the relationship long before you even had a clue. Kudos on moving forward and your new future!
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 02:22 PM
2

Absolutely that as well. It's always funny when you have an open spot if somebody can't show up or something that you get to hang out with a stranger for 4 hours and those strangers are always freaking awesome. I know some of the guys on this thread say that they don't have anybody. I would say get into golf. Some of the loveliest strangers you could ever meet
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 09:50 PM
3

Nice work! I too find that my mind will float towards thinking about her from time to time but it's less frequent and when I see it at face value rather than the myth that was It's easier to move on. I coach my daughters softball team and see her on her phone 90% of the time not watching the game..... just like when she was in the house with her nose in her phone. Insta programing a feble mind for dopamine. So glad it's over. Just like you I've found a 180 in a partner and it's so refreshing. Wi…
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 06:48 PM
3

Part of golf is getting outside. I find that to be the best part of golf. My game waxes and wanes but the mental health of just being outside is immeasurable.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 06:53 PM
3

Don't do it!!!! I once let my ex wife now ex ex wife back into my life and regret it terribly. Good for a while then the D word out of no where with no explanation other than we have grown apart..... I got to spend that time with my daughter in her early years so it wasn't a total waste but would have been in a better situation. You did it once and know what she's capable of. I know that feeling of lost love and wanting your family to be together. I get that but it will backfire. It's not an if …
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 06:27 PM
2

People are like the weather you can't control it/them you just gotta deal with it/them. Man I feel for you. Especially right now in a state of limbo. This is such a hard stage as your entire future is up in the air with so many tangents and possibilities. The feeling is gut wrenching. The one main future that you've focused on for years has been shattered and that vision is now so far away. The feeling of loss is alot. Especially when your here doing, loving, trying....... Going through past act…
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:39 PM
3

As seen in all these posts she's probably already started the process of distancing and leaving you if you are here. Act now if you want a chance at saving what you have and can be. As stated above find a counselor ASAP and don't ask her just do all the work so all she has to do is show up....... You'll definitely get the temperature of the room so to say when you ask her to join you. Good luck. Regardless be the best you can be for you and your littles regardless of how well/poor your relations…
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/23 01:34 PM
13

Sorry to hear brother. Simular situation as nothing could be done no infidelity no lead up just she wanted a divorce..... totally blindsided. Seeing my little girl struggling was absolutely the hardest part. I can control my emotions and feelings but seeing her sad was gut wrenching. Yes she's gotten better and it's still a work in process but the initial blow was rough. Forge forward and be the best version of you from this point on. Take every moment with your kids and let them be your focus o…
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 05:29 PM
2

You've got the right attitude. Give them your full attention when you've got them. They seriously grow up so fast. When you choose love you can't lose. Sending good vibes. It is gut wrenching but they will be ok. In the moment it sucks so bad to see your kids sad. Just kill them with love, patience, and kindness.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 02:48 PM
3

I think you tell them. There's never a good time..... at least at school they would be surrounded by friends and be able to vent about it outside of the home. Random things to break up the day to distract from the heaviness of what's happening.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 10:10 PM
1

Get a dog...... love and purpose come instantly. Take it for walks every day religiously and get outside.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 04:00 PM
22

This 100%. Live your life. Your new partner of over 1 yr is not so new at this point and obviously a big part of your life and they should start to get to know each other. Unless stated in the court documents let her know she has no control over this and should focus on herself and her life not meddling in yours.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 03:20 PM
1

Also why the security cameras were ripped out..... leave her behind and forge a strong path forward. Focus on your needs,wants,goals. She's gone don't give her any head space. I know this sucks and you have so many emotions and what could haves but those are all in YOUR head. Do you and start now. That's what can change and that you have control over. This is gonna sting for a bit. If you get down give yourself few minutes to be there then lite that fire and forge forward. This is the best time …
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 03:00 PM
6

You don't get divorced to stay best friends....... friends and especially best friends don't do that to each other. Being able to coparent cordially would be ideal. Still having her in your friend circle is a whole other ball game. Let her go in that aspect. It's important to set that boundary early to help you move on mentally. Your next relationship will be soooooo much better off without her in your life.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 02:45 PM
2

This was her decision I would not do anything more than court mandated amounts. Stick up yourself. If she's losing her marbles, then she shouldn't be able to focus on how much money she's getting........ if she can't take care of herself. Then you get the kids more often which is less maintenance and child support for her. She will probably throw a card saying, Well, then I'll just be homeless when I have the kids. Nope they will be at your house. Do not give her an inch because she will take a …
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 05:57 PM
3

Even in an amicable situation you should still include all the parenting legal jargon. First right of refusal etc...... don't let her dump your kid(s) on someone when you are more than willing and able to be with them. Make sure drop off times are included....... Give them an inch they will take a mile unless you've taken care of this
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/23 05:10 PM
1

This--- get things done and signed before that"new" thing is over and you become the focus again. It was over as soon as you guys started the process. Don't focus on these little behaviors and live yours.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 08:55 PM
12

Yep, don't say anything. It would only reaffirm her position in doings so.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 10:36 PM
2

No financial responsibility = no contact if that's what "they" want...... is how I'd see that going down. To ask for reimbursement for what they decided to buy... no friggin way. Especially with that financial security. Her dad obviously is money minded and probably know better that his daughter is one of "them" so he wants that to be your problem not his.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 10:16 PM
7

Shitty feeling.... yes. Just be the best loving dad you can be. YOU are her dad. She knows that. Be the best you that you can be for yourself and for her. Manage the off time to better yourself and set up your time with her for success and allow her to be the focus and be seen. Yes that sh!t will sting but the better you become the less that sh!t matters. Put your focus on living YOUR life and not thinking/wondering what she is doing. Rock this life you've been given you only get 1 and worrying …
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 03:59 PM
1

Do simple things like take a walk and be outside. Life finds a way
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 06:54 PM
1

Yes this. Even with an amicable separation. There are still terms that need to be involved for future reference. Things like first right of refusal for when things change and they are not going to be with the child/children on thier time you should be the first contact.... Yada Yada. I would have a lawyer put all the verbage of suedo horrible divorce into the agreement to protect yourself and future craziness. You may think it's fine now but.... BBT bitches be tripping.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 04:19 AM
4

I've started dating an eastern European and the diffence is 10 fold from American woman. Values,work ethic both around the house and life, cultured, conversation, sex,everything has been better.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/23 01:05 PM
7

It seems like you took the time to better yourself and do the work. Doubt she did the same...... hence showing up back at your door. Proud of you for bettering yourself and your world.
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/23 09:55 PM
4

I wish you all the best and a favorable outcome. Your determination should speak volumes.
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/23 09:50 PM
3

Just tell her you can alternate birthdays but always have a party for him either way if that what your child wants....... Always listen to him (your child) and his needs and wants. If it's her time on his birthday she can do whatever.. And then you can do a party for him either before or after that at your house or somewhere else fun with a few friends. It's your time with him either on his birthday or befor/after and she can't do anything about it. If she gets mad just tell her it's not a compe…
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/23 02:03 AM
5

Absolutely 100%. It's hard to see right at first. Giving the Ex any head space is a waste of time and effort that can be used elsewhere.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/23 06:34 PM
1

Just the words...... Stability Freedom Then it's not directed and more of a presence and reminder
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/23 04:49 PM
4

You get your time. They get thiers. Don't ask about him..... do your time wholefully and genuinely. Don't sound interested in him or what they are doing. That's desperate. Do you. Live your life! LIVE YOUR LIFE!
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/23 12:48 AM
1

Oh helllz yeah!
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/23 03:37 AM
3

Absolutely involve a lawyer and track every payment. It will get even worse if that is where she is already taking it. Stand you ground stick up for yourself and the kids. Once they turn there's no coming back. Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/23 11:58 PM
8

Blessing in disguise...... her loss. I love the positive energy. Keep grinding and manifesting greatness.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/23 09:44 PM
1

It's OK to be frustrated. She can "say" this and that but you know the truth and reality. Find peace in that and carry on. It's one step in front of the other and eventually, you will not be walking in the mud. A man that walks with his head down misses the beauty and possibility in front of him. Her words have no more value or space in your life unless you give them space to. From what it seems your doing the right things and this is a safe space to vent. Try not to give her words any power in …
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/23 05:58 PM
4

I'm so sorry you are going through this. Maintain that bond and commitment to your children as much as possible. I too had those moments of complete rivers or tears when leaving them. It's human and shows how much you care. It's hard to turn and walk away knowing that's the last thing you want or they want. It would seem the wife will be ex wife soon enough. She left and is not coming back. Catalog everything from this point forward. She says amicable as possible now but that rarely is the case.…
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/23 05:21 PM
4

Dude don't beat yourself up. Learn from the past and accept the present. She said she'd be there through thick and thin and when you needed a little help she dumped you. Selfish instagraming women these days. Stay grounded and focus and Manifest positive future for you and your littles. The choice is all yours from here on out.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/23 09:50 PM
2

I actually kinda went through a scenario where she said she was going to refinance the house in to her name. Turns out she didn't qualify so then she basically stopped caring about anything within the house kind of trash it moving out........ Go about it in a way that is not mean or malicious to not invoke the wicked witch anymore than needed but protect your ass. Most of the time if a judge gets involves they give them a 180 days to sell it or start paying you. I'm in Colorado I'm sure that cou…
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/23 01:33 AM
1

This
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/23 02:45 PM
3

She'll just want more......
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/23 03:23 PM
3

This
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/23 09:20 PM
2

This. Also that's a lot for anyone in a short amount of time. Be easy on yourself and follow through with the above. The counselor will help with all that and then some mentally. The doc will do with what ever the test results comeback as, but without addressing the mental side of it can you trust the results....? Start at the counselor. Most ins covers a huge portion of it. I know it takes time to find one and set it up but the results will be more conducive and long lasting than a boner pill t…
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 08:27 PM
2

I'd say don't jump! You stated not feeling ready and wanting to see whats out there..... go do that too. Communicate that to her. She may not like it but she may see where you are coming from. Thats a legit way to approach it. Maybe after some time you find that she is right but dont live with regret so go do you. Also you'll have to watch your ass as in little swimmers as she may take things into her own hands and decide for you. Seriously! A woman on a clock is not exactly seeing things in rea…
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/23 07:51 PM
2

It's worth the time to call the ins company just to find out
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 08:23 PM
2

Almost all health insurance covers a majority of the cost believe it or not. They at least subsidize a huge chunk. Going through an actual divorce will take all that time and money and then some... it's worth the investment regardless as you'll be better for yourself moving forward which allows you to be better for your kids.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 08:22 PM
1

I would try couples counseling in addition to individual counseling as well. That would be a great start as opposed to breaking up the family. Divorce should be the last resort. Going through all steps to see if something can be done beforehand allows for you to have no regrets about divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 03:49 PM
3

I only respond if there is a question regarding the kids. Other msgs are just ignored and do not require a response. Also msgs that are answered are as short, consise, and brief as possible. No,yes are acceptable answers.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/23 02:21 PM
1

Yeah I had to do the living together situation too. Once you know there is no turning back it's just business after that. You absolutely have the right idea of putting you sons intrests at the top of the priority list. Once they turn on you it's game over. If she's so worried about your son on her side then she can make adjustments or just give you more time as you seem mentally fit and financially stable enough to take on more time. She of course will never admit to that because that's less $ f…
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/23 02:12 PM
2

She can ASK for that all she wants. I'm in Colorado and it's straight forward on maintenance and child support based on income and length of marriage. Everything else is 50/50. If you had say a house/business prior to marriage then it's just half of the appreciated value for marriage date. Not much to argue about...... they think they can take you to the cleaners but then reality hits them. Stand up for yourself because it's you and your child's livelihood. She'll have to make due on her end and…
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/23 01:30 PM
1

They start to realize this after making the decision to destroy the family only when you stick up for yourself. Mine tried to basically just ask me to walk out the door and then take 5050 of the kids just so she could have her own time. Id take 100 if shed let me. Devils in disguise. Stay rich in love and the kids will see that. They see it all. Stick to your guns. It's all usually 50/50 assets and then what the court decides for maintenance and child support. Stick to that and don't engage in a…
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 07:56 PM
1

Stuck up for yourself and get everything you've worked for. If she can't provide a safe stable environment then you get the kids more or all together. Don't give an inch to her as she will try to take 1000 miles. Let her figure that side out and if she can't you get more time with the kids. They will be ok just know that. They understand way more than you think. I remember going through this shit when I was a kid and what carried me was the love. I remember we had a 1 bedroom apartment for a few…
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 07:08 PM
1

You'd regret not having time/being there for your children. 8k is not worth anything regarding the childrens time with you and love that you'll get to give them. That's what's important
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 10:16 PM
4

This!
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 01:01 PM
3

Most apps have a section to block profiles from contact list....... id do that and move on down the road. HINGE seemed to work the best for me
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 03:50 PM
2

I used to feel that way. Now that the space has been created she's disgusting to me. Personality the whole thing. Introspective it made me question my motives and why I even cared. Men can trick themselves and stay sooooo much longer that we should. Do you x10. Work out and keep that focus. It will all pass and you'll have another hottie in no time
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/23 04:35 PM
3

Nurses and beauticians are the biggest floosies of them all
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/23 03:57 PM
2

Hey brother be strong. Your choice to love and be there for your daughter is whole heartedly the right choice. Just love her and maintain the communication and live with her. I'm in Colorado and it's literally the same process as with a legal marriage. Here it's the same 50/50 of all the shit you've accumulated. Basically you'll have to choose a start date as you didn't get married per say. Usually it's the date you moved in together. Stay strong and focus on your betterment. Let go of all that …
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/23 03:52 PM
3

I agree with this answer. Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/23 06:31 AM
1

You could just get a vasectomy and not tell her.....
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/23 05:50 PM
1

I know amicable in the beginning is always what everyone wants. Then all the other things and emotions start to rage and it changes the whole dynamic. They will talk to people, search the internet, and all of the sudden what worked yesterday is now off the table. Typically the courts are going to award 50/50 across the board depending on the state your in. Check the interwebs for you state/county. A lot of them have divorce calculators that they use just so you can have an idea of what your spou…
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/23 04:28 PM
1

I have the same 50/50 custody arrangement. This has worked well. Then the kids at least know where they will be based on that day and gives them some certainty in the whole thing. Just try to be present when you have them. Your time with them is the most important thing and will strengthen your bond. Be engaging and have no regrets about your efforts. They grow up so fast and the last thing you'd want is to wish you did more.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/23 04:10 PM
2

Go to a restaurant then comedy club. Girls always say if you can make them laugh then they will be yours. Also most comedy place require you buy a few drinks. So now you don't even have to be the focus all night and you have a shred experience to boot. Always turned into a 2nd date without fail...... good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/23 09:25 PM
1

USB it is then....
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/23 09:05 PM
2

Wow, that's a crazy scary #. Stay strong boys!
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/23 07:55 PM
2

I would keep a copy of all of it as is does come up every once in a while. If not digital already I would scan them all and save one set to a USB drive and then also email yourself a copy. Email is accessible from anywhere which makes it convenient if needed and USB as a backup.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/23 07:43 PM
2

I'm in CO. Basically here equity is split 50/50 from the time she entered the house. Depending on how much the house was worth when she entered to how much it's worth now is split 50/50. The origional equity before she entered is yours EVERYTHING after she entered is 50/50 including shared debt not just positive assets. So if house was worth 200k when she entered and is worth 400k now she would get 100k.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/23 03:06 PM
1

How did you meet her? If you don't mind me asking of course.
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/23 11:39 PM
8

This is the way...... love yourself. Don't give her space in your head. Work out anytime those feeling creep into your head. Head to the gym if not hit the push ups,jumping jacks,standing squats. Get some weights for your personal environment in case the gym is not an option. Do things you want to do. With friends if possible but it's good to do them as an individual as well. Live YOUR life and the rest will fall into place. No its not an instant snap and those feelings disappear but this has be…
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/23 04:41 PM
1

Maybe try to sell her half of the bar to someone else. It will help to have new blood vested in the joint and you help further the process of ditching her.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/23 11:34 PM
1

You just gotta do you. If you have hobbies and interests outside of the marriage or something you want to pursue. Just go out and do it. The divorce will be an option at any point but you'll have to deal with you so if you got a way to spend your time you've got at least something. Regardless of how you feel if you really don't have many friends you will be loosing one friend who knows more about you than any. albeit she maybe not a great one but still it will hurt.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/23 05:57 PM
1

It really does too.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/23 05:41 PM
27

Stay positive. Kill her with kindness. When you choose love you can't loose. If you keep cool and don't react to that behavior you win in a sense. You can look back and have no regerts for how you handled that bag of shit of a situation. It will be hard but you can do it. Know going into situations to fortuitously keep your cool. It will just kill her cuz she wants to hate you but you're not giving her a reason. Not sure of the back story but you can control what happens now into the future. Tak…
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 06:09 AM
1

Thx for the info.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/23 02:47 PM
1

I'll start burning ink..... Even if I don't need it will at least be there.thx
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/23 11:46 PM
2

Yep...... so stupid. The road looks long. I know will be fine but before that comes a dump truck of fuckery.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/23 11:06 PM
3

Yeah. All rationality has gone out the window with her. She now thinks that just because she wants something she gets it. Harsh reality coming if she can't see that is not the case. It will only poison her soul more and hurt our kids more. But you can't reason with delusional.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/23 09:36 PM
3

I know! As of right now she doesn't have an attorney and is just talking to the tax guy..... who may or may not know more about this. She just had to do tax reporting to make it look like she makes more to qualify to take the house minus my equity. She didn't qualify so goes the money grab for whatever she has up her sleeve. Disgusting
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/23 09:07 PM
1

Found 1 but now starts the long road that I really wanted to avoid at all cost. Just kills me. Less for the kids, less for our living future. Who knows how deep this will get as I don't know her side of the business Financials and how she spends it. She recently got a boob redo and liposuction too about a year ago. Fake hair extensions. That should have been my first sign. Nothing is real about her anymore and all trust is now broken. That might be the worst part.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/23 09:05 PM
3

I know it's so unfortunate...... smh
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/23 08:37 PM
1

I would advise marriage counseling. Maybe go by yourself first..... The words coming out of your mouth will be seen as an attack. Coming from a counselor or her our mouth will seem like a breakthrough. Worst case it doesn't work but you've said your piece and will move forward with much more purpose and less regret. Good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/23 07:10 PM
1

Don't look Don't search. As hard as is.....choose to live. Your friends your life......happiness is with that
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/23 08:15 PM
2

No problem. Rooting for you brotha. Your choice to live YOUR life will lead to your happiness
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/23 03:25 AM
2

Control the things you can control. You may not want this but her decision has effects for you. How you choose to move forward is your choice. I have dealt with this twice now with the same woman with mental health/ depression issues. Choose the high road and do not engage in any of the bullshit and don't do anything that you will regret. Patience and self love while you are separating. Dont focus on what she is doing or give it merrit in your head space. Yeah it sucks but again you dont get to …
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/23 12:14 AM
1

It's hard but now is the time to focus on you and bettering you. You'll have plenty of what could I have done moments but give yourself a minute of that then motivate yourself via work out or meditation. Get outside!!! You are the one who deserves your attention right now. Fill your cup so you can be great and share that cup of positivity with your kids. Be great. A better you is what is going to come outta this. She's shown her colors and they will fade while you do the work for long term shine…
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/23 04:44 PM
1

I would also look into how the order changes as she finds employment afterwards. As most likely the amount you have to pay her will not be enough for her to live on in her "normal" world so she will get a job. Once that happens usually the agreement changes based on her current income and the terms adjusted accordingly. Consult with a lawyer in your area as they should know if this is what is sanctioned in your area. Fucked right at first but long term adjustments sway your way. Either way if yo…
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/23 04:23 PM
2

There is some type of vibration, low light therapy that helps bring closure to past traumas. I unfortunately do not know the name of it right off hand but when I went to marriage counseling we did individual sessions and this helped with past traumas and they have been basically squashed and not part of my current reality. Worth looking into....
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/23 04:01 PM
2

Keep the shit up. You're choice to be proactive and present for them is the best thing you can do. Keep that shit up and your relationships with them will be stronger than ever and mutually rewarding. When you choose love you can't lose and you'll have no regrets. Don't forget to take care of yourself as well. Filling you happy cup allows you to share your happiness with them.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/23 02:29 PM
2

It seems amicable so you guys will just have to decide a schedule of who gets to claim with the kids each year and go from there. If you're going to get a bunch Of leniency via your medical bills this year let her claim the kids this year and that starts the schedule.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/23 04:29 PM
1

It's a hard thing to do but you gotta let got and start manifesting a better future for yourself and your kids. She's gone bro. Yes, there's a ton of shitty feelings that come with that. Loss, you feel betrayed. A feeling of failure. The truth is you didn't make this decision but you have to live with it. Control the things you can control. Make time to be a better you. Start with your health and the rest will follow. Join a gym if you haven't already. Getting in shape is the best motivation to …
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 02:35 PM
1

I hope this story is true because it's epic!
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/23 04:33 AM
3

I say manifest what you need. If you're still gonna try to work it out you stay grounded and self improving. If it's over and she's already burned the bridge there's no better day than today to look forward to the rest of your life.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 06:41 AM
3

Rarely do you see the opposite..... BBT bitches be tripping. Most men pivot much more smoothly and choose to love. The overwhelming slide of a woman who initiated the divorce is quantifiable and usually leads to less happy than before. I think the reason most men move on and love is because they have no regerts for how much effort they gave. The life with regret is a miserable one. I suppose we should all invest in boxed wine because I'm guessing that market is booming!
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 12:32 AM
1

Thank you for the reply
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 04:33 AM
1

Just means she owns the business by herself.....
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 02:07 AM
1

Nope they are legit
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 11:55 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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