TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

DudeMyHeartIsBroken Archive

View 1 post and 15 comments by DudeMyHeartIsBroken on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
8

DudeMyHeartIsBroken/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 05:08 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

This was really helpful to read, thanks for taking the time to type it all out and share.
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/23 02:20 PM
1

You're absolutely right. If I could get myself to settle down and get some sleep it would be very helpful - this week its been a combo of having a few beers/melatonin, and cannabis to get me chilled out and knocked out for a few fitful hours - which isn't healthy. I am in therapy, and I have 1 solo appt with our marriage counselor, 1 appt with my therapist, and 1 joint appt with our marriage counselor lined up next week. I've also been looking at support groups. My last breakup put me into the l…
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 10:59 PM
2

We actually had a conversation about eventually working our way to being friends afterwards and discussed some logistics over the next few weeks. I'll have some alone time tomorrow and plan to start getting an inventory of the things I need and want. It has been helpful coming to terms with the reality that we will not be able to work things out - getting my head into the right space for the coming changes.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 05:52 PM
1

Coming around to this reality still. I won't qualify for anything retirement related, but I can make claims for equity in the home and savings, as well as allocate portions of debt incurred if needed. My plan currently is to see what she offers during mediation while having these numbers in mind, and if we hit an impasse we'll get lawyers involved. I am confident I will not have to worry about alimony, and I am realizing that while it's stressful at the moment I really do have a lot of the power…
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 05:45 PM
2

Just starting the process after being asked for a divorce on Monday. Getting my plan together and proving to myself on paper "I'll be ok" has been tremendously helpful for me mentally. Still struggling mightily, especially with sleep and appetite. We're keeping things as positive and amicable as possible so far, and I'll admit there is still a big part of me that wants to work things out. This forum has been very helpful in getting some stark reality-check feedback, and getting my position firme…
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 05:31 PM
1

Keep your head up man, it takes a tremendous amount of determination to turn away from our vices - and even more when we're going through a difficult time. Addiction truly is a disease, and it needs to be taken seriously. I know that both my wife and I have developed and unhealthy relationship with cannabis, and have been using it to numb ourselves for quite some time. I've taken a few "tolerance breaks" this year, and as we are going through our separation kicking this and nicotine are going to…
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 05:13 PM
1

Thank you, and honestly this is where I am at currently. Respecting boundaries, communicating clearly, being open, and really addressing my issues. Developing a plan has really helped me feel more confident and secure in myself, more so than I have felt in the past several months. Worst case I am headed in the best direction for me personally, best case (admittedly for now) we are able to recommit and move forward together. I'm literally so close to being in a radically different place financial…
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/23 07:55 PM
2

Yep, I’m going to likely go with a short term furnished rental for a few months to have some flexibility. This will give me the opportunity to figure out where I want to live without committing to a lease, feel out the tweaks at work, and figure out if I want to take the opportunity for a “clean slate” and to relocate closer to family. Work will have me traveling a good bit as well, so it might mean living out of a suitcase with a storage unit and a PO Box for a bit - but what better time to get…
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/23 05:12 AM
1

I will likely have a consult with a lawyer soon. We had a very brief discussion about the financial aspect of things and logistical plans for the next few months tonight. Based on that conversation I expect things to remain amicable, but I have no clue what I really want and need to ask for in the long term. I get it, men constantly get screwed in this deal and I look like I am lining myself up to do the same. I really do appreciate the insight and people looking after my best interests - but it…
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/23 04:41 AM
1

Thank you for the clarification, and I appreciate your stance as it is the fact based way to look at everything. Things are still very raw, and at the moment I am most concerned with 1) getting my plan developed and in place for the next 3 months and 2) keeping things as amicable as possible while not digging myself a hole. I am able to do that without a huge fight and move on with my life.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 10:50 PM
0

While that is true, I don't want to open myself up to alimony. I'm not sure how real the possibility of that is in our situation.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 05:44 PM
1

If 100% of her income had been going to savings I'd agree with you; however, she did pay some bills and had some expenses. I shouldered the vast majority of our daily expenses (food, entertainment, etc). She has a solid amount saved up for an emergency and rainy day funds, but not enough to get into a drawn out case over or risk alimony for. And it might sound strange, but I don't hate her - I hate the situation, but we're talking about someone who is my best friend. I don't know what the future…
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 04:22 PM
2

Thank you for taking the time to write such a thorough response. Actually talked with a friend of mine who is a lawyer, and at the moment we are looking at a “fast uncontested divorce”. I started researching apartments last night, but I’ll admit that process is going to take some time for me to come around to. She is heading out of town to spend the weekend with family, so likely going to go apartment hunting this weekend.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 11:39 AM
1

Thank you for the insight, and you’re absolutely correct. Ego helped get me into this mess, it definitely won’t help me get out of it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 06:52 AM
1

Trying to stay ahead of that. Honestly it’s been the weirdest time - almost like a pressure has been lifted and we can actually talk and communicate again. We even talked a bit about what my next steps would be, whether I stay in our area or relocate to be closer to family. I’ve been bitching about my job for quite some time, but I can’t help but wonder if all of my marriage stress has been what’s burning me out.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 06:03 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter