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Due-Fix-1038 Archive

View 0 posts and 18 comments by Due-Fix-1038 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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7

Great reply. The lawyer will indeed give you a sense of direction and understanding that will address any anxiety brought about by this. Do take some time to ensure you look after yourself, too. Change related stress is very different from work or family stress. Reconnect with friends and hobbies/interests, go for walks, have hot baths/warm showers - whatever it is, create a new, metaphorical space for yourself to support yourself during this time. Friends and family and good therapist can be a …
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/26 07:18 AM
1

Well said. This ain’t the school playground.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/26 12:39 AM
7

The pattern to truly look for is whether or not the woman takes any accountability for her own role in the demise of the marriage. My experience is both people make mistakes, some to varying degrees but rarely is it one person. If it is all the bloke’s fault, run away fast. The labels etc are impossible to know for sure but the evidence of poor emotional regulation sits on the surface. I recently spoke with my ex after 2.5 years of occasional texting only about the kids. While it was nice to mov…
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/26 11:39 PM
6

3 years in and past the worse of it. Ex continues to behave in an emotionally dysregular way but I know how to handle it now. I’m fitter, happier and a much better dad and employee as a result. Starting to date again but taking it slow. Had to hit rock bottom first all those years ago to get to here. It’s hard, but I am grateful for the life I have and to be away from that toxic person.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/25 02:05 AM
2

People change and if values and needs no longer align, that is fine. Think of the good times you had and move on. If you give in and make those big life commitments when you don't feel right or ready, you will absolutely regret it. Kids are hard work and expensive. Relationships naturally take second place to kids. Marriage is just a social norm but it can also be costly if you think there's a chance it won't last. Whatever you do from here, don't rush it. Speak to family and friends, a counsell…
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 10:46 PM
1

The difference in my case is that it wasn't a source of any problem. It was an excuse designed to provide that person some relief from the discomfort of the reality we found ourselves in. It became one of a number of excuses where blame for her actions was assinged to something or someone else. Anyone but her. When both people acknowledge they need to do the work, the repair is much more likely. If one allows themselves to continue their behaviour because of something they feel they cannot contr…
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/25 08:43 PM
7

My ex blames the 'patriarchy' for her very poor and abusive behavior towards me. My view is we are always the ones in control of our emotions. When people blame concepts for their poor behavior I personally view that as a lack of accountability. Whatever the reason, deal with it and please stop being emotionally dysregular. Hormones can certainly do strange things - hopefully with this insight she will still take accountability and apologize for the hurt. The accountability piece was really a bi…
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/25 07:53 PM
8

So my situation was the ex seemed caught off guard and had a meltdown when I told her I wanted to separate. This despite years of emotional abuse towards me, checked out entirely and depressed (but in denial about it) and an earlier temporary separation where I attempted to discuss the issues. At the end of the day, when I got counselling for myself, I quickly learned that I cant be responsible for her emotions - only mine. She either joined me in the journey or we had to be apart. She had also …
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/25 06:37 AM
3

There’s no 50/50 in Australia. 60/40 or 70/30 are the best outcomes, the male the one receiving less of course. Then there is child support and in cases where the mother doesn’t work and the father does, spousal support on top of that. There are just as many ways to be bled dry here, brother, and our cost of living is extremely high, meaning restarting as the working partner is very difficult. To answer OP I wouldn’t change anything - it’s been life changing for better and worse but I’ve my wond…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 04:57 PM
1

Yeah I’m two and a bit years post separation and my ex has had about five boyfriends and I’ve dated one chick an been on a few coffee dates. It’s difficult because I always think the worst will happen: they’ll be like my ex and disengage in the relationship and just put me down. Like you said, it’s a sign of insecurities from the marriage, just gotta keep working on it. But there are some pretty fucked up people out there who probably should be doing work before dating and it does pay to never s…
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 10:21 AM
4

This is spot on. If you've left an emotionally abusive relationship and are separated it is absolutely right to set boundaries. It's up to their mum to manage her emotions. It's not up to the kids to be her therapist. I had to cross a similar bridge and setting the boundaries has helped all parties.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/25 04:53 PM
3

I'm in a different country but similar issues, however it largely relates to separation of assets and child support (what I think you call alimony). Funny how in the age of equality when two adults decided to go separate ways one ends up with two thirds of the assets and the other is expected to start over again and then pay child support, too. This needs to be sorted: 50/50 for assets, and mothers capacity to return to work calculated into choke support so they don't laze about collecting dad w…
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/25 04:58 AM
10

I notice every woman calling a man a narcissist has also self-diagnosed with ADHD. These women are broken and there something ill about social media that seems to cause it. I’ve been fortunate to not date the two years after my divorce and just focus on my own wellbeing and it’s been amazing. I honestly don’t think I could date again with some of the bozos I see online
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/25 10:34 AM
5

You start by being accountable, which you are certainly doing. Use this moment to grow as a person. The accountability has to stretch back to the challenges you were having with emotions. See a therapist and discuss it. But most of all, go easy on yourself - it takes time to heal.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/25 05:07 PM
4

Mine was Instagram reels of feminists and women telling her to leave her husband. She didn't, I left her because she withdrew so much and I felt like a financial cash cow and she also became emotionally abusive. But I totally agree, social media is toxic. I'd have accepted it if I was a lazy prick but I wasn't. By the end, I was cooking and freezing the week's dinners, doing 50 pct (and usually more) of the domestic and yard work, and was keenly involved with the kids. I was the one who was burn…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 11:48 PM
12

The less involvement the ex has in your life the better. She will always be the kids mum and it’s important to leave the dispute out of their lives as best you can, but just don’t invite her into it. Ever. The other person will always be annoying, just have to learn to accept it. Takes time, trust me!
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/25 06:06 AM
2

It can be very tough and please know it’s normal to experience grief during a separation. You’ll have good days and bad days. Try to find a peer support group of other guys who have similar needs just now and are being facilitated by someone who has been there done that. The reality is a divorce can be savage both emotionally and financially. There is no sugar coating it. A lot of our fear and anxiety comes from wondering what will happen next. Fear of the unknown. Being in a psychologically saf…
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/25 11:33 PM
1

First thing you need to do is say this out loud to her. Clear is kind even when it feels awkward or hard to do. End of the day, she needs to acknowledge her part and her flaws too. She may not be in the right space to do it, but nothing can truly change unless you both acknowledge there’s problems and commit to working on them. It’s wonderful you want to stay. Again, it takes two and is not solely your choice sorry. You will both work this out as you go. Get a therapist - a personal one and sepa…
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/25 11:17 PM
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