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DumbWordsmith Archive

View 0 posts and 3,069 comments by DumbWordsmith on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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7

Considering that one group believes that looks are all that matter in life, the difference is pretty significant. At least the Red Pill sees a purpose in getting your shit together, even if the direction they take it after that is completely degenerate.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 05:07 AM
17

Same if she's on an app for an extended period of time. The extremely picky/delusional/validation-seeking women are overrepresented on apps as well. Most grounded women aren't dating nonstop. And a lot of the women at these events are probably women who weren't satisfied by the buffet they had on the apps, where they can filter based on shit like height.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 12:35 AM
11

Isn't Clavicular technically a black piller? AFAIK the Red Pill was about becoming high-status, charismatic, wealthy, strong, and dominant, not about focusing on your bone structure. But, yeah, most influencers of any kind are just trying to get money from attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 12:13 AM
0

Stop consuming Red Pill and feminist content. Just stop. It's trash. Neither "side" gives a shit about you, and they're all useful idiots. You're never going to be an "alpha Chad," and the women you want in your life are not the type who spend all day rambling about dating nonsense online. Focus your mental energy on pursuing your interests and taking care of yourself and the people you care about. Ignore women who exhibit red flags.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 06:52 PM
1

Women break up partnerships for "the dildo" all the time. Men have seen it and have experienced it themselves. It's understandable that some guys don't want to fork over their time and money for something that is unlikely (genuine love from a woman).
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 01:39 PM
1

My husband for example is much fairer than me blue/green eyes dirty blonde hair but we both have good arched thick brows, and similar faces structure. Good example to demonstrate this would be Tom holland and zendaya - on surface look nothing alike but look at their face shapes and bone structure quite similar. I notice this with really attractive people. I don't really notice it with average people. My parents, for example, don't look anything alike, and they've been married for almost 40 years…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 01:24 AM
1

Most people actually partner up with someone of similar attractiveness Right, there's no doubt that long-term partners are usually of similar attractiveness, because most extremely attractive men (there are exceptions) have little incentive to commit to average-looking women, even if they're occasionally physically attracted to them in the short-term. humans are even more attracted to people with somewhat similar faces That would explain my issues back in the day, because I've never seen a woman…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 12:20 AM
–

I agree—obsessing about it is silly, because you can never really know anyway. It's better to pay attention to how she treats you. However, I also think that a relationship will likely fail if there's a big enough gap in physical attractiveness between the husband and the one that got away—unless the woman is very grounded and isn't prone to fantasizing, which is rare (as is a guy who isn't pron-brained).
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 11:58 PM
–

I'm not interested in dating at the moment, and I don't need to be the hottest guy a woman's been with (because I know that's impossible anyway). Marrying a woman at my age would be ridiculously dumb IMO. But you responded to a guy who does care whether women hooked up with "Chad," so I figured it's worth bringing up. Most women aren't going to marry men who are anywhere near the hottest men they've been with. Those types of men are wanted by all women and can commit to the hottest women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 11:42 PM
–

Ok, but average-looking women (the vast majority of women) can hook up with men who are significantly more physically attractive than the men who are willing to marry them (in most cases). Any hookup app will demonstrate that. For average-looking men, the opposite tends to be true IME. The women I've had serious, stable LTRs with were way more attractive than any woman I can hook up with. It's not even close.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 11:15 PM
–

Of course, if she makes every guy wait, then every guy is being treated equally, so there is no relative disrespect towards one man compared to another. There's absolutely no reason to expect this type of behavior in a secular culture where female promiscuity is seen as empowering. The hot man is often worth the risk by default. The non-exceptional man (i.e., the vast majority of men at their peak) must demonstrate that he's worth the risk Honestly, at a certain point, we all know whether or not…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 10:23 PM
–

For me, a mixture of curiosity (always been interested in human behavior), entertainment, and a desire to have my views challenged (though I've realized that most here aren't exactly engaging with you in good faith). I've been visiting this place from the beginning, going back to the decade that I was in LTRs. .why are you dwelling in a space most women would be put off by LOL. Who cares? It's an online forum. Women are put off by a lot of things (including my face).
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 08:03 PM
-1

You might be attractive enough to do that, but most people aren't particularly physically attractive, tall, or wealthy. There's quite a bit between "better than nothing" and "my first choice."
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 07:27 PM
0

An average-looking person (i.e., the vast majority of people) is likely not going to be anyone's first choice. Why would any person who's not stunningly gorgeous or handsome (and in the case of men, also tall, wealthy, etc.) expect to be anybody's first choice? Settling for nothing less than someone who loves you and cherishes you is reasonable IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 06:05 PM
3

Yeah... Do you not understand my point? Men with high standards are selected against by nature. Men with low standards spread their seed whether we like it or not. I'm not advocating for low impulse control.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 12:09 PM
2

I'm a man. When it comes to romance, I don't engage in any behavior. I've been with two women my entire life (both LTRs) and haven't bothered dating in 5 years (and likely never will again). I'm very picky (not about looks), and this severely limits my already limited options. Most men who behave like me are bred out of the gene pool, even if some of our physical traits are above average, as women are very picky as well. Nature selects against men like myself. Meanwhile, it selects for men who a…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 11:55 AM
3

It's neither good nor bad. Men evolved to have lower standards. If men had women's standards, humans would probably be on the brink of extinction.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 11:40 AM
1

Political cults.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 02:33 PM
1

I'm not into cults. I let individuals show me who they are.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 02:19 PM
0

it’s always the most misogynistic men and misandrist women spewing it No, there are plenty of sex positive men and women who are misogynistic/misandrist. Sex negativity isn’t itself sexist, but it’s bigotry adjacent. Which is meaningless, because you determine what's "bigotry adjacent" according to you. Nobody else cares.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:57 PM
1

Again, you're making assumptions about double standards. not a physical quality that their body is responding to physically Physical qualities are not the only qualities that people respond to physically. The sexist part is believing that men and women’s value is inversely affected by sex. None of this applies if the man holds himself to the same standards and is attracted to a woman who shares his views on intimacy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:43 PM
1

You don't have to justify it, period. There's no reason for a woman who's not attracted to short men to have to justify her lack of attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:30 PM
1

Right. She might have different views on intimacy, and you might prefer a similar level of experience (for whatever reason). Regardless, if you're not feeling it, you're not feeling it. Allowing another person to talk you into being attracted to something is foolish.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:25 PM
1

Good point, and choosing not to date due to differences in views would be just as valid.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:16 PM
2

Maybe he wants someone with similar experience, similar views on intimacy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:08 PM
2

My bad. He was responding to a person who made those claims. That said, it's perfectly reasonable to feel that your lifestyles are incompatible to some degree.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:07 PM
2

Your position just got even more absurd. Just because you're not attracted to someone doesn't mean you think they're "bad." If a woman doesn't find a 5'1" man attractive, and she doesn't want to grant him access to her body or life, it doesn't mean she thinks he's bad, and it doesn't mean it's hateful.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 01:05 PM
-1

Maybe he's not attracted, for whatever reason, and prefers someone who's similar to himself. That doesn't make him a sexist. And it doesn't mean he's holding a double standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 12:59 PM
0

That doesn't even make sense. Basically, if he's not attracted to the same type of woman you are, he's sexist (even though he's still attracted to people of the same sex who behave differently). Pure brainrot. The reason most of them even explain themselves (they shouldn't BTW) is that people like you start lobbing insults. You're also assuming a double standard when he might have the same standards for himself.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 12:52 PM
3

Feeling pain isn't a choice. Holding resentment is a choice. Building up walls that nobody can break through is a choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 07:54 PM
1

Not really. What you're repeating is blackpill/radfem propaganda (though I know you're not in either camp). I’ve read that young women are earning just as much and often even more than young men. That's been true for quite a while, and it's only true for young women in a minority of metro areas (and young women tend to flock to the big cities more than young men). For example, Pew found that women earned the same or more (not much more) in just 22 out of 250 US metro areas. Overall, women's earn…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 04:30 PM
4

theres no magical way to make you become a playboy chad if youre unattractive physically and your personality is too Unless a man is a 10, he shouldn't expect to "bed 10s" without effort. Personality helps, but only to a certain extent. Most dating advice isn't useless IMO, but either way it has to be paired with the man having to learn how to live with rejection and stepping out of his comfort zone (if he feels like the possible outcome is worth more than being single to him). We all know what …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 03:23 PM
0

Who is “most people?” People who fit within the average range, which means they're likely a fat person (indicative of poor self-control and delayed gratification) who's very influenced by social media (at least in the US). That reads like some “all women bad” rhetoric. No, that's your interpretation. IMO, both sexes do it. A small chunk of women and men actually care about finding a good "partner." I wouldn’t have children with someone if I didn’t feel like we could take care of said children fi…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 01:16 AM
0

Sure, but a lot of young women nowadays aren't even having kids within stable relationships. Also, if a woman actually wants a good "partner" (and not just a means to an end), a man's current salary isn't necessarily the most important aspect to look for when it comes to long-term support (though his intelligence, work ethic, and passion play a role). It's just that most people don't really want a "partner"; they want someone they can use to boost their ego and status.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 12:50 AM
1

is predicted that almost half of all women will stay child free. What's your source? Who's predicting this? Morgan Stanley estimates that 45% of 25-44 YO women will be childfree and unmarried by 2030. They're counting women in their mid-20s, and people are starting families later nowadays. Morgan Stanley didn't predict that these women will never have children. This is blackpill/radfem propaganda. You have no "legacy". And thats fine. I agree here. I think legacy is a foolish thing to be obsesse…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 11:20 PM
4

So you can admit that your point doesn't follow? Nice. Also, 99% of all crime? That's not true either. Keep it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 05:06 PM
5

Most "bio-men" are neither, so your point doesn't follow.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 05:02 PM
2

I'm not taking accountability for the actions of the worst men, and I don't expect all women to take accountability for the actions of the worst women. The individuals who do wrong should be held accountable. I agreed with your main point (so there was no argument from me). However, that doesn't mean I'm obligated to stop there. Focus on what you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 03:28 PM
2

That would make them a prize in a way that men are not Yes, in a way that the average man is not. Men were a prize in the past for their greater financial earning capability A lot of men are still seen as "a prize" for their earning capability. Like the average man, the average woman doesn't earn a good wage. Obviously, average-earning women are not earning as much as high-earning men, and low-earning women are not earning as much as average-earning men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 03:21 PM
5

No, it's just that women are desired for sex, so they're inundated with attention and validation from the opposite sex. Many women are constantly fishing for attention from attractive men. Unlike men, however, they often get it (temporarily). It's easier to convince yourself you're "a prize" when you're constantly getting praise and attention, regardless of the other party's motivations.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 03:05 PM
2

That's a great point—though the way you frame makes it clear that you hate men ("many men" and "men's own actions").
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 02:54 PM
2

Obviously. That's text-based AI, though (and women are the primary consumers of erotic literature). That stuff is what tends to appeal to women, as discussed above. I'm talking about the possibility of interactive video content that would involve men generating endless hot women and giving commands to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 02:09 PM
1

maybe we just have extremely high IQ I doubt it has much to do with intelligence. I think it's about being addicted to a certain type of emotional stimulation. I promise you most feminists don't care if men talk to AI girlfriend. "Talk to" is putting it nicely. Most feminists wouldn't do anything. It's the loudest and most aggressive who would likely complain about objectification, among other things.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 01:40 PM
1

I have my AI tools set up to be as critical and cold as possible, which is the exact opposite of what I'm attracted to in a woman. I don't understand the appeal of pretending to have emotional conversations. I only have those with real people I feel emotionally connected to. I can't even imagine how normalizing this is going to damage future generations socially. What I find ironic is that AI partners seem to be more popular among women. Right, I think that will even out when men can generate in…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 01:09 PM
2

Objectively, I don't know. Perhaps? But I can only speak for myself (with my own biases). It's impossible to nail this down, because I know IRL we would've already discussed it by year 2. Expectations would be set, so there would be no need for her to worry about proposing by then (as I'd already be planning it). Also, I wouldn't even consider marriage if she couldn't give me a healthy family, as in my eyes, legal marriage means stability for the kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/26 08:08 PM
2

In most cases, they do finish last (if at all). Just like men, women are very flawed people. I still strive to be the best person I can be, even though I know that the vast majority of women aren't viscerally attracted to that type of man. Some women (very few) can control themselves and appreciate a good, strong man on a certain level (and recognize/confront their own flaws), rather than take advantage of his kindness. And they expect the man to temper himself as well. The average woman's uncon…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/26 04:34 PM
1

It depends. In my 20s, when I was fully committed to building a family, I would've found it weird, but in a really good, endearing way. I would've been flattered—because a) I know she has the illusion of endless options, and b) I know how badly the average young woman seeks to protect her ego. It would've strengthened my desire to bond with her. However, if we're both in our mid-to-late 30s and have been dating for less than a couple of years (not sure what you mean by "a while"), it would come …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/26 03:28 PM
5

You're attempting to argue with people whose selves are completely wrapped up in their ideologies (mostly due to a weak sense of self). Therefore, they perceive any legitimate criticism of their preferred ideology to be a personal attack against them. No ideology in this flawed world is anywhere near perfect. If someone's incapable of criticizing an ideology they closely align with, they're in a cult. This sub is full of cult members of all types, some of whom spend large portions of their days …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/26 03:04 PM
6

Uh, yeah—if she's going out half-naked, it's time for a talk. I wouldn't get with a woman like that, and I'd consider leaving if she started to do so, as that's a blatant red flag. If I started dressing like shit, should I be surprised when she has a negative opinion about it? Should I be surprised when she leaves me for dressing in a manner that she finds off-putting? Dafuq.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 05:11 PM
5

Right, I think most of those men are pointing out women's hypocrisy rather than attempting to be anybody's "allies" (LOL). My only "allies" are my family and friends, people who truly care about me as an individual. I'm not "allying" myself with anybody based solely on immutable characteristics or surface-level partisan bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 04:54 PM
2

I think a lot of men that are incels are incels because they won't lower their standards. They could always go lower, but "those women" (insert offensive slurs) don't exist to them. They can't accept that "those women" are an appropriate pairing for them in the state they they are currently in as men. Why would any man or woman pair with someone they find unattractive? People get together because they're attracted to each other. It's not your "appropriate pairing" if you're not attracted to the …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 03:35 AM
3

Sure, some will find decent men. However, I've seen plenty of ugly men married to objectively attractive women as well. The average ugly man isn't as lucky (or attractive in other ways). There aren't an infinite number of attractive, sane, driven men.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/25 11:50 AM
1

According to what? Morgan Stanley projects that 45% of women 25-44 will be childless and single by 2030 (not the majority), but they're counting "unmarried" as "single." A lot of women are in committed relationships but not married, and a lot of women are in short-term relationships. Marriage requires the man to propose.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/25 12:51 AM
1

Not all, especially among the ones that rarely comment. And a few are just temporarily angry/hurt. But some of the biggest posters are clearly Dark Triad types.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 03:17 AM
4

Attractive, warm, fit, grounded women often get sex and commitment from attractive, tall, masculine, fit men with good jobs. Just admit that the type of man you want is rare and exceptional, and only a small percentage of women will ever get it. And the type of woman those men tend to want is rare and exceptional. If you can't become that woman, deal with it. There's no gender war. Winners will continue to win.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/25 03:06 PM
17

They're not boycotting shit anyway. This is histrionic-esque nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/25 02:43 AM
4

A giant chunk of women can't even figure out how to get commitment from a man with a sense of honor and a well-paying job before letting a deadbeat hit it raw. I wouldn't count on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/25 01:54 AM
1

Yeah, but why the need to justify it at all? Do women ever need to justify things like this? Just do it. Walk away and stop looking for approval from other people. Use that freed-up time to get what you want from life. You don't owe anyone your time and attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 01:28 PM
1

Sure, but just because someone wouldn't be alright with this doesn't mean they're drowning in insecurities about everything. First, we don't know anything about this "guy" besides what he presents online. Second, we don't even know if he's actually a guy or if he actually has a fiancee. Third, someone who is secure wouldn't be posting this on multiple subreddits, asking other people for their opinions.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 12:42 PM
1

Yes, that's what agreeable people tend to prefer. That's not necessarily what disagreeable people prefer—regardless of intelligence.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 07:26 PM
1

Very telling you can't come up with an example. I don't think we need to go into detail about violence and callousness. It's pretty obvious. Someone can be twice as intelligent as you yet have absolutely no empathy or desire to feed/house the needy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 07:09 PM
3

And that's not logical to you? It's very emotional. I have empathy for the innocent kids and fear that the quality of my life would suffer otherwise. Even a person with a low IQ could come to that conclusion. Which is? What highly intelligent people who are very low in agreeableness are capable of doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 06:31 PM
1

I'd prefer not having starving kids on the street or desperate people robbing my house and nearby stores. However, someone else could be higher in intelligence (and lower in agreeableness) and prefer to take another approach. And again, that has nothing to do with personally raising a kid.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 06:13 PM
4

YOU SAID: We're talking about having to raise another man's child Yes, if you choose to be in a serious relationship with a single mom, you have to raise another man's kids. That doesn't mean you have to choose to be with a single mom. Ah. You just really don't like that society gives a fuck about kids in general. Based on what? Again, you're comparing our society's efforts to help ensure that innocent kids have food and shelter vs. personally raising another man's kids. Being a step-daddy doesn…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 05:33 PM
7

So it's intelligent to support the genes of another man. It has more to do with agreeableness than intelligence. Then don't. No one's forcing you guys to be stepdads. It's not normal behavior to deeply hate people you simply dont want to date. I don't hate single moms (though I would never be in a LTR with one). I'm telling you that being in a serious relationship with one (and having to raise another man's kids) doesn't make you more intelligent.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 05:21 PM
10

That has to do with ensuring that you can continue to live in somewhat of a peaceful society, though. We're talking about having to raise another man's child. There's nothing unintelligent about refusing to raise someone else's kid. To me, it's beyond off-putting. Some men love doing it—and a lot of them are much less intelligent than I am.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 05:06 PM
2

I never said they shouldn't have hope. However, the ones who succeed come to understand that it requires an entirely new lifestyle, brutal honesty/accountability, and diligence. It's not a set-it-and-forget-it type of thing out of the gate.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 12:46 PM
3

Sure, we all can do that through persistence, but most people will fail to shake long-term habits. Novelty and butterflies hit the dopamine system fast and hard. Solitude doesn't. To be happy alone, you have to get good at practicing delayed gratification and learn how to regulate your emotions without relying on instant dopamine highs from other people. IMO, people who seek novelty and butterflies tend to have a certain baseline temperament to begin with. Years of "training" just strengthen tho…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/25 03:29 PM
5

I agree—it doesn't just apply to women. That said, I never claimed that it did. I was referring to human beings in general. We're the sum of our habits, which are tough to break (especially the ones we fall back on during challenging periods).
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 11:46 PM
2

I don't take these bubbles seriously. It's normal to be in a poly relationship on here (and other similar platforms).
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 09:17 PM
1

Trust me, I feel the same about you. LOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 08:47 PM
5

There's a lot of gray area in between. Not everyone wants to be a slut.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 08:45 PM
1

Yes, it's about habits. I'm glad you understand that part, at least.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 08:34 PM
5

If sex is just sex, then it can very quickly become just sex again when the relationship hits a rough patch, and the addict needs their validation, excitement, pleasure, relief, or comfort. When shit gets rough (and in LTRs, there will be rough patches), people tend to go back to what they know. Obviously, that doesn't mean all of them do, but most do. Your habits make you who you are. If you have a habit of seeking strangers when you're short on validation, excitement, pleasure, relief, or comf…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 07:09 PM
5

if you are looking for someone who won't cheat, then you should look at the amount of cheating they did Again, this is impossible to ascertain. You're relying on the word of a liar (a cheater). She's not incentivized to tell you the truth, and there's no Hoefax. if you want to be in a LTR you look if they were able to commit to someone in the past Right. If I'm looking for someone who is likely to value long-term relationships, then I'm seeking someone who a) has a history of stable long-term re…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 06:49 PM
6

I hope they run away for the lack of logic lol What's illogical is expecting a liar to tell you the truth.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 06:29 PM
4

It's all good. But even that dude didn't claim that every high n-count person is a cheater.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 06:20 PM
7

Is this in the Red Pill bible somewhere? And what does that have to do with me or what I wrote (especially considering that I'm not even a Red Piller)?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 05:47 PM
9

Not every sex positive, high n-count person is a cheater. I'd love for you to quote exactly where I claimed that everyone with a high n-count is a cheater. If you're not willing to address my points in good faith, we have nothing to discuss. Let's not waste time.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 05:46 PM
3

I'm a very dumb moid. However, if someone says to me, "The average man in my social circle is 5'11", I'd have to be even dumber to respond with, "Yeah, but I'm 6'2", doe."
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 05:38 PM
7

So we agree about habits? Cheaters are liars, so I wouldn't necessarily get an accurate picture of a cheater's past. That's like politely asking a criminal to turn in all of their guns. I'm better off observing how a woman reacts when expressing my views about promiscuity in general. Wasting time is pointless. I'm looking for an equally yoked relationship. I'd rather invest in a person who hasn't spent years training themselves to see casual sex as a reliable source of comfort, pleasure, excitem…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 05:29 PM
15

As criminal and drug recidivism rates demonstrate, habits are hard to break. They rewire your brain. If you spend years training yourself to seek novelty and butterflies, that's going to have long-term effects in many cases. Pretty much anybody can find a long-term partner if they're willing to settle. That doesn't really say much about fulfillment.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 04:39 PM
7

Congrats—but I said "not all." I know ugly guys who are in happy marriages with conventionally attractive women as well. I don't think most ugly dudes can pull that off, though. And your 10th guy? A couple of the women I know probably go through at least 10 men a year.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 03:52 PM
1

On both sides: loyal, attractive, intelligent, curious, grounded, driven, gracious.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 03:40 PM
15

I'm talking about two types: women who I know for a fact were loose, and women who had an endless line of "serious" boyfriends. I don't know many women with substance issues, to be honest—aside from a couple of alchies (maybe). I was never close to druggies, and I grew up in a conservative area. I'm not saying all of them ended up being train wrecks, but most of them did. I don't think those who chase novelty and thrills make for good long-term partners most of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 03:18 PM
3

Uh huh. Somehow, worthwhile women end up with worthwhile men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 03:04 PM
3

You're over here whining about men and putting women on a pedestal. Look in the mirror, lady.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:53 PM
2

I didn't deserve to be treated like that, but I didn't deserve a good relationship either. And it was an excellent learning experience. Had she flipped the table in my 40s or 50s, it would've stifled my growth. But she flipped it a few weeks after my 30th birthday.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:51 PM
2

IMO life gets a lot better when you're completely honest with yourself and work on improving what you can control. I'm tackling every controllable negative one by one.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:45 PM
3

I wasn't worthwhile. I didn't deserve a good relationship. For starters, I wasn't physically attractive enough; my teeth were jank, my hairstyle/vibe was nerdy, etc. I wasn't masculine enough; I didn't set firm boundaries, I was too needy, I had a weak sense of self, etc. Also, I overlooked her red flags, as I was desperate to fuel my own ego. I'm able to admit that most of it was on me. And our personalities were incompatible, as I'm orderly and she's chaotic. My dad set me up for failure, to b…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:41 PM
51

Yeah, I'm in my mid-30s, and most of the 304s I know are absolute train wrecks. Also, I don't think that merely being married and having kids means that you're in a high-quality, loving relationship. Any woman can get that.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:34 PM
2

Not sure what stats you're referring to, but men who don't throw money at 304s exist. There are plenty of fat women who would rather read weird erotica than lose weight and work on building a real relationship with their partner. If you put up with that, it's on you. It comes down to being worthwhile and going out of your way to find worthwhile people.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:30 PM
5

I bought my ex-fiancee flowers all the time. I've never shelled out a dime on content. She cheated on me with a man who never bought her flowers. The average human, male or female, is very flawed. It's up to the individual to a) make themselves worthwhile and b) find worthwhile people. It's a lot easier to hype yourself up with narcissistic bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:14 PM
3

the system rewards men who take freely and women who over-give The average person, male or female, is selfish, entitled, and greedy. Men who don't set boundaries get taken advantage of as well. Been there, done that. It's not men's fault that you've spent your life operating under covert contracts. Learning how to set boundaries (and refusing to ignore red flags) is great. Acting like a bitter, entitled, self-absorbed, whiny brat? That leads to other problems. I certainly have no desire or inten…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 02:06 PM
4

If you were worth it, you'd get it. Accept reality, keep whining, or work on improving. The truth is harsh: No amount of narcissistic rambling and shitting on the opposite gender as a whole (while propping up your own gender) is going to fix it. Compete (or don't). The average person is not special.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 01:12 PM
6

Honestly, in the average relationship, women give men: Nonsense. The average woman is overweight and entitled. She can't cook from scratch, is addicted to attention from random men, and wants a man to come along and fix all of her problems. And the average sax worker is an even bigger train wreck than the average person. Most attractive, warm, grounded, loyal women end up in relationships with attractive, masculine, grounded, loyal men. With all due respect, if you can't compete for that type of…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 12:43 PM
3

I'm not getting mad at women. I'm drawing attention to your foolishness. Instead of attacking his opinion, you said, "As usual, men don't deserve any empathy." addressing the real issue Take a good look in the mirror. The behavior you're choosing to engage in is part of the issue. (Or keep spending your free time rage-baiting lonely, lost dudes on this subreddit who are likely 10+ years your junior.)
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/25 03:20 PM
9

As usual, men don't deserve any empathy Y'all post this type of blatantly misandrist shit and expect young dudes to take you seriously and see you as the reasonable side? LOL. FOH.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/25 02:00 PM
1

Yes, you're stating the obvious for those who see it as immoral behavior, like me. However, that means nothing to someone who doesn't share your moral framework. It's on you to do whatever you can to avoid it. As I said, it's not going to stop. In many cases, it provides a useful learning experience for those who are actually paying attention and willing to admit their mistakes.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/25 01:40 PM
3

Being willing to play the part of a romantic person yearning life long commitment Yeah, this happens on both sides. Human nature, at its core, is rotten. Welcome to reality. Many men use women; many women use men. Finger wagging isn't going to make it all go away. It's up to you to pay close attention to how much the other person is actually investing in the relationship. The other person isn't "doing all the right things." You're just choosing to overlook the negatives and prioritizing the wron…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/25 01:24 PM
6

This isn't about deserving anything. Other people can choose to give you much more than that, and you can choose to give more to others. I don't know what caused you to be so full of spite, but you're creating your own hell.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 08:42 PM
8

So you've adopted the mentality of an entitled brat? Nice. Humility, warmth, and gratitude—without those, what's left for a man of high character to love?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 08:13 PM
1

I know a handful of average/ugly men who have that and a lot of good-looking men who don't. Finding the type of person I'd want to share a life with has less to do with looks and more to do with luck and looking in the right place. But I'm not holding my breath. And yes you owe women everything inside and out. LOL. No.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 10:35 PM
1

I'd love to find a fit, sane, warm (feminine), childless woman who shares my values and is actually attracted to me. I would be more than happy to uphold my side of the bargain for her. I thought I had that in the past; knowing what I know now, it's probably not gonna happen, but never say never. You owe them everything. I don't owe the average woman a damn thing. She's not my mother. She hasn't done anything for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 08:04 PM
1

Sure. But most don't qualify for a serious relationship with physically attractive, smooth, sincere, successful men However, if they admitted they don't qualify for a serious relationship with those men, they'd be admitting that they're not as attractive as they say they are. In reality, they can't compete. Instead of acknowledging their shortcomings and working to better themselves, they spend all day online shitting on/rage-baiting men they see as losers (who are often a decade or more younger…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:27 PM
17

And many men want the same. However, the average woman doesn't have purer intentions than the average man. A lot of women only want validation, status, and money from men, just like a lot of men only want validation and sex from women. And plenty of women just want hot men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 02:22 AM
1

I don't think you're dumb at all. I think you're brainwashed and allowing yourself to be ruled by ego/anger. There are no victories to be had here.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 02:12 AM
–

Again, not what I said. We have nothing to talk about because you're programmed to repeat the same nonsense (and apparently can't read).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/25 12:27 PM
1

Feminists ignoring the suffering of average men throughout history doesn't change the fact that it happened either. You don't have to take women's historical suffering That's not what I said. I can't take feminist nonsense seriously. Average people were always treated like shit. The feminist narrative is that average men had it easy compared to women. It's nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 02:37 PM
1

I'd rather be at home than working in terrible conditions (just to die at a young age) or being viewed as cannon fodder. My great-grandfathers on both sides did the same. None of those men abused their wives. I can't take modern feminist nonsense seriously.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/25 10:22 AM
0

You don't have to remind anyone to do that. Average men were always work horses and cannon fodder. My grandpa (I'm from Eastern Europe) fought in a war and worked in the mines (where most of his 5+ brothers died) while my grandma was "oppressed" at home. On an individual level, this is the best time for both average men and average women (in the West), and neither seem to appreciate it. We're as free as we've ever been, and likely as free as we're ever going to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/25 11:27 PM
–

Vibes. If she seems like she won't, then why bother? Maybe she comes off as entitled or high-maintenance. Maybe she behaves selfishly while interacting with you or others. Maybe she seems inauthentic/untrustworthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 09:27 PM
–

It depends on the man. In a lot of cases, probably. Personally, I wouldn't give a promiscuous woman flowers or do that romantic nonsense with her, no matter how hot she is (and I doubt she'd appreciate it anyway). I can't fake it, and I don't have the patience to try. The woman has to be aligned with my values and "worth it." For me, it comes down to values, emotional warmth, and chemistry. Looks do play a part in the sense that I don't think I could fall for a slob who doesn't take care of them…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 09:10 PM
1

If you seek validation and admiration from others, you don't love yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 06:38 PM
1

It's not worth much to the average person, sure. However, self-control typically leads to better outcomes than impulsivity in the long run. Being a kind-hearted man, on its own, is worth absolutely zero on the dating market as well. That doesn't mean it's a bad thing, though—far from it. There's just a lot more to it than that, and you have to accept that a lot of people are broken and crave instability.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 06:51 AM
1

That's not what I said, that's what you're saying. They're "losers" for being with their matches. What makes their marriages "shit?" Because they're not hot? People who partner up with decent, attractive people with good self-control are winners in my view—and they're rare. If someone wants to settle for being unattractive, indecent, and impulsive, that's on them. However, I think a person who aims to be anything less than their best self (and puts up with indecency and a lack of self-control in…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 06:09 AM
3

Most people mate assortatively. There is evidence that bears this out. Yes, that's what I said: Winners win, and losers lose. Most people are in shit marriages. Most people are overweight (have poor self-control). I have no idea why you're telling me this. If you want to soapbox get a blog Because you're talking nonsense. There's no reason for us to accept that it's the case for all women. Not all women sleep around. Some women are significantly better than others. A decent man has no reason to …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 05:43 AM
3

There's no need to accept that it's the case for all women, as not all women sleep around or sleep with "toxic" men. But many men can accept that it's the case for the majority of women in this cultural environment (or, at the very least, a non-negligible chunk of them). In reality, the few decent, attractive women with self-control will continue shacking up with the few decent, attractive men with self-control. Everybody else loses in the long run—some much more than others. Do what it takes to…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 04:45 AM
1

Ah, you're not American—my apologies. But, yeah, I was talking about the American South. The fuel costs in LA are insane compared to ours. Where I live, gas is almost two dollars cheaper per gallon than in LA right now. That said, I was born in Eastern Europe (and just got back from a very long visit there a few years ago), so I know how bad fuel costs are on that side of the pond. The housing prices were pretty bad in the urban areas there too. I remember this shitty house near the main road (w…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/25 11:19 PM
2

I live in a small or mid-sized city in the South, and 4 times the median salary is about right for a three-bedroom home in a decent neighborhood here. 11x the median salary is bonkers. However, I have an old friend who now lives in LA, and that seems to be the case for him (which is even worse considering fuel costs).
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/25 02:18 PM
3

It's time for American Zoomer men to pursue overweight women who have dozens of men in their phones, and dedicate years towards landing a job in the future that will likely be handed to AI or someone from another country. And they can look forward to renting their home forever. I can see how that's a tough sell. And I can see how women aren't exactly excited to get with passive men either, but anyone with common sense could've seen this coming. Incentives—they're just not there for many.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 08:29 PM
0

I'm a naturalized citizen. Many of my family friends brought their spouses from overseas, and it took them years (and a lot of paperwork) to do so. There's a process. It's very clear. Follow it or GTFO. When my family came to the US legally (with green cards) during Clinton's second term, my parents were told that they'd be sent back if they even asked about applying for benefits. I'm for granting amnesty to those who were brought here as kids and are now hard-working adults without criminal rec…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 07:44 PM
1

Having to be a rock for a woman who's an emotional roller coaster is one of the biggest reasons why I don't want a relationship right now. It's draining. Relationships are mostly "emotional labor" IME. Not all women are like that, obviously, but most of them are (especially the ones who are single at my age). I see it with my friends and family. Only a very mature, self-actualized woman is appealing to me on that level, and those are very rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 07:28 PM
2

But they are also picky to get in relationships in the first place bc they want a relationship that's they think is desirable not good enough. They seem to be less picky than they are with hookups, for obvious reasons. Women don't really seem to have a lot to lose by getting into a long-term relationship these days. They can bet on a man's growth and leave whenever they feel like it. But they value having easy access to sex and validation whereas women pretty much always have that. No reason to …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 07:32 PM
2

I definitely wasn't rich. Most men in their 20s are far from rich. I was in my last semester of college when I met her, but I graduated as the top undergrad in my school a few months later. Actually, my ex made more money than me during that relationship (which lasted 6+ years), though I helped her land her job (and keep it). I don't consider myself to be a particularly funny dude, no. My friends think I'm funny, but that's about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 04:41 PM
3

Because they really liked my personality and thought I was stable and sweet? One of my exes called me cute and kissed me every day for years while writing in her journal that she found me physically unattractive. She really tried to make things work. (I find that smart women are great at faking enthusiasm.) Anyway, my point is that average-looking women can get with much more attractive men outside of LTRs, whereas for average-looking men, the opposite is true. To me, it's obvious which one is m…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 04:09 PM
1

Yeah, I'm not talking about hunks. I'm talking about fairly attractive men with a few shortcomings. Most women can't get commitment and a stable LTR from those men either. I doubt any woman I've been in a LTR has found me cute (in fact, I know one definitely didn't). I damn sure wasn't their type based on their celebrity crushes. But, again, the women I can land LTRs with are much more attractive than any woman I can get outside of that. Unlike women, I'm not getting attention/validation from at…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 03:54 PM
1

I disagree. The opposite is true IME. Data shows that a small percentage of women are single at any given time—and most are not with handsome, fit men, as those men are rare. Most women can get more attractive men for short-term relationships, so they often feel like they're settling for what they get in long-term relationships. The women I can get for a long-term relationship are more physically attractive than the women who'd be willing to be with me without commitment. Men who crave variety m…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 02:13 PM
4

So when you say “every hobby group and event is a sausage fest,” that’s true, but it’s not just because women are at home swiping. It’s also because a non-trivial percentage of men have been radicalized by the online manosphere into believing that showing up to salsa class, co-ed sports, volunteering, church, whatever, is “cope” or “beta” or pointless unless you’re already a 9/10. This part doesn't make sense to me. If they are sausage fests now, how will they become less so when more men show u…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 12:00 PM
2

That's why a man has to make himself better than most men if he wants a high-quality life. This applies to everything, not just romantic relationships. And a very attractive, sweet woman's beauty rarely fades if she takes care of herself (especially not at 30). It's mostly average women whose leverage tends to fall off a cliff from 30 to 45, as they become giant liabilities to any man worth a shit (much of it by their own doing); even then, it tends to happen gradually, not when they hit a speci…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/25 05:20 PM
–

No question, it was the body I had when I was doing bodybuilding in my early 20s: giant chest, thick biceps and triceps, and a wide upper back. I wasn't on the level of competitors or anything, but I was way too big for my frame. I had to force myself to eat throughout the day, and my training sessions would last 1-2 hours. Had I maintained that lifestyle, even as a natural, I probably wouldn't have lived to see 60. It was so unhealthy. I'm 6'1". My natural frame holds about 178-184 lbs at 10-12…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/25 12:24 PM
3

Nothing at the moment—but in my 20s, my goal was to build a family/life with one awesome person. I overlooked red flags and let my ego guide me, and that bit me in the ass. Once my bite/palate is fixed (and then my dorsal hump is reduced), I'll give it one more go with a woman in her late 20s or early 30s, but it's probably not going to be the same. I expect it to be a lot more transactional and a lot less lovey-dovey than it was in my 20s (though maybe that's for the best). I think I've develop…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/25 03:52 PM
3

So? Only a people-pleaser cares about the opinions of degenerates whom they don't respect. If I'm going to listen to another adult give me advice, it's going to be someone I look up to (or trust), not some coomer without self-control, common sense, or foresight.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/25 05:50 PM
2

Then I'm sex negative at best (in your view). I prefer being with a woman who's sex negative at best (in your view). Call it what you want. I want someone with a similar past (steady, stable relationships) and similar values.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 01:38 AM
2

IME, very few men see 1 as a high body count. At this point, I'd never expect to get with a woman who hasn't already had other stable, serious boyfriends, but I don't want to be with a woman who has had hookups. I want to be with someone who shares my views on relationships—or just stay single.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 01:19 AM
3

That's not the same thing, though. And what's "high" to one man might not be "high" to another. What's too "short," "broke," or "ugly" to one woman might not be too "short," "broke," or "ugly" to another.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 01:02 AM
2

In this exchange, nobody other than you mentioned anything about virgins. If an individual is not attracted to someone for a certain reason, they don't need to talk themselves into being attracted to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 12:50 AM
2

I'm not the same guy, but if I were forced to choose, I'd take the first. That said, it's a dumb question. Why pick either when you can just look for someone cool who shares your values? There might be nothing wrong with a hypothetical 5'5" dude, but a woman doesn't have to date him just because he has a personality she likes. The height may be a dealbreaker for her; ultimately, it's up to the individual to decide who they want to share their life with (if they wish to do so at all). You're prob…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 12:38 AM
3

What's more unfortunate is that those are just the women who admitted it (and it obviously doesn't necessarily include women with other jacked up fantasies and motives). I'm way ahead of you, Chief. I've long accepted that the type of woman I'm capable of loving dearly probably only exists in my fantasies. Unlike most men, I can't love someone who's into that shit; maybe something is wrong with me—dunno and don't care at this point.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 12:53 PM
3

CNC is the only one that gives me "the ick." I'm fine with billionaires and monsters—sure, you fantasize about psychologically dominant men who are the richest, largest, and strongest. The monster stuff is weird, but whatever. However, I can't respect someone who's into CNC. I can't imagine calling someone like that my "partner" or "wife," or living with them—especially knowing that they did that with other men. Nah, I'm good. That's too much for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/25 01:23 PM
1

I'm legitimately happy when I see a "good," handsome man who has a beautiful, kind wife (and a family) who treats him with respect. I wish we rewarded those people. So, no—not at all. I don't care about not being picked. Being chosen by (and choosing) the average woman in this culture is not a win IMO. If a man over 30 commits to an average woman in the West, whatever comes from that decision is his fault.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/25 06:13 PM
2

You're talking about the Morgan Stanley report saying that 45% of women 25-44 will be single by 2030? In that report, "single" means "unmarried." Single doesn't mean they're not in a committed relationship. In order for a woman to become married (in most cases), the man has to propose. Until their senior years, the vast majority of American women are in committed romantic relationships. I've been with women who didn't find me physically attractive. Most women can't seem to live with romantic rel…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/25 04:25 PM
1

I don't know if you can read this (or whether you were being sarcastic), as you seem to have deleted your account. We probably disagree on a lot of things politically, judging by what I've seen you post (as well as your old flair), but I think you're an extremely rational, intelligent, and sharp young man—for whatever it's worth coming from me. Truly.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/25 04:22 AM
2

Yeah, because it isn't attractive in most cases. Women aren't any better than men. Very, very few women are actually emotionally mature. Very few of them can recognize the dangers of giving in to their passions. (There's a reason why we used to go through great efforts — through the use of realism disguised as myth — to keep all of this behavior in check. In many ways, human nature is revolting, and a lot of people can't keep it together without guidance.) Emotional maturity isn't attractive on …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 04:02 PM
3

Went on amazon and searched for romance book, looked at the first 15. There is only one book with dark themes called lights out. Everything else doesn’t seem to imply a dominant, sadistic, wealthy male love interest. Right, I guess what I'm referring to is "erotica." Would you say that if a person is dominant, wealthy and high status, they are a product of the patriarchy? Would you say rich people cannot exist without the patriarchy? Why? No. But the man in these fantasies is just a taller, weal…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 08:48 PM
3

Okay but what are you basing this on then? Are we moving away from the discussion about movies and books? Since there are many popular books about tall, handsome, non-sadistic guys. Much more than books about tall, handsome sadistic guys. I'm basing this on the trash that litters the front page of Amazon. I just looked it up and a very large percentage of the audience is above 18. The average audience age (in the cinema) is 34. Sure, I enjoyed The Hunger Games books at 20 (actually found out abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 08:18 PM
3

Do women want poor, low-status guys with cancer or rich sadistic crazy guys? They want tall, handsome, rich, sadistic guys who worship them (and only them). IMO the heart-warming story is appealing to certain women in some ways, as it makes them feel like good people. But that doesn't mean they're not fantasizing about the tall, handsome, rich, sadistic guy when thinking dirty thoughts. And Hunger Games is YA. It's not relevant to this discussion. I wouldn’t say a woman having liking wealthy or …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 07:25 PM
5

https://www.nbcnews.com/pop-culture/books/fifty-shades-grey-was-best-selling-book-decade-n1105731 The data was from a market research company named The NPD Group (now Circana). Again, we're not talking about a book that sold well for a short period because it performed well within a certain niche. We're talking about the best-selling books in the United States for an entire decade. I don’t see how that has anything to do with the patriarchy? Sure, take tall and handsome out of it (though OP ment…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 06:56 PM
5

Except it was the most popular book of the decade. Clearly, it hit the spot. Also, the go-to example of the dream man from literature that many more 'refined" women use is Mr. Darcy, who was described as tall, handsome, and high-status (but the author was a Christian woman, so she had to keep it tame).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 05:44 PM
5

which is not to say it doesn’t exist. It’s just not as popular as you make it seem You're downplaying it quite a bit. Fifty Shades of Grey was the best selling book of the 2010s. A book can't really get more popular than that. 365 Days, the movie based on the book, dominated the Netflix top 10 for a large part of 2020. (My ex was friends with a well-off woman who left her husband and planned a trip to Italy after watching that movie. That's the only reason I even heard about it.)
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 05:25 PM
1

Yeah, fat dudes. Just exercise and eat well. If a man can't do that much, I don't know what to tell him. If you live like a normal human being—from before this clown-world lifestyle was normalized—you won't have as much of a testosterone issue. I'm saying it's avoidable. It's not in the genes.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 04:00 PM
1

For fatties and idiots who juiced their testicles into peanuts, maybe. The decline in testosterone with age isn't even that drastic if you control for obesity. The real issue is that the average 40-year-old dude is fat and has eaten hyperpalatable slop for at least 10-20 years (if not his entire life). If you eat well, sleep well, exercise, manage psychological stress, and stay away from booze, andropause ain't beginning at 35.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/25 03:21 AM
1

Conscientiousness, inquisitiveness, and warm-heartedness. I want someone who'll self-reflect and hold herself accountable, someone who thirsts for wisdom and asks questions about the world around her, and someone who's eager to provide care and grateful to receive it. The world is brutal, and there are enough problems to deal with outside of the home. I don't want undependable, dull, wicked people in my circle.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/25 02:57 AM
1

Not the same person—just speaking from my perspective. Unlike OP, I'd rather not know about her past. I'm not interested in hookups. As soon as I know, the emotional attraction flips like a switch. But you can still feel turned on without feeling special. So what I said could apply to the OP as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/25 12:23 PM
2

That's obvious: Because she chooses to give you what she wouldn't give to any other man. And it's 100% her choice—unlike with long-term relationships, where much of it has to do with what the man is willing to give her (so a lot of it is out of her control). Women are bombarded with options. A lot of attractive men will sleep with pretty much anything given the right circumstances. If she had all of those options and never flinched for any man but you, then of course you feel special. She chose …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/25 08:28 PM
1

The childless part is a mistake but now I realize it doesn't effect any of our arguments so it doesn't matter. But you brought it up. What really matters is that it's unmarried women, not actually single women. You didn't address that. "Single men are more likely than their female counterparts to be searching for romantic experiences. Half of these men are looking for a committed relationship and/or casual dates, while 35% of single women say the same." Pull up the article for the 2019 Pew surve…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/25 11:39 AM
-1

You do realize "single" means "unmarried" in that study, right? That doesn't mean those women are actually single. (And, obviously, a man has to choose to propose for a woman to be married.) And that's up from 41% in 2018. That's just a 4% projected increase over a 12-year period (again, projected), and there are likely many factors at play. Second, the page you linked to says nothing about childlessness (nor does the more recent one that I found and linked). Finally, here is Pew's data from 202…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/25 04:40 AM
-2

The vast majority of young women (18-49) in the US are in romantic relationships. Unless all of those men are Chad, most of them settle for men who aren't Chad. How is this even upvoted to the top? LOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/25 11:25 PM
1

It's online feminist nonsense (often echoed by black pillers), though. He says half, yet the vast majority of young women (20-50) are in romantic relationships. Most women settle for men who are nowhere near Chads (even when it would be best if they didn't IMO).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/25 11:02 PM
1

You didn't address anything the other person said.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/25 01:50 PM
1

100%. I'd be willing to give one warning. After that, I'd GTFO without saying anything. I've never even thought about tolerating it (or treating someone like that). It's pure disrespect. Somebody failed to raise her properly, and I'm not responsible for fixing a broken woman who should've figured it out on her own. That's another reason why I don't understand men who hop into marriages. She can fake it for a while. Give her a few years to expose the worst aspects of herself, and then see if you'…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 12:57 PM
1

And it misses the point that most women don't qualify for that. The women who do qualify for those men tend to get those men. Aside from delusion and entitlement, there's no reason for an average-looking (and in the US, overweight) woman to think that she should have results that compare to that of a woman who looks like Scarjo or Christina Milian (or any other attractive woman) at their peak. Anyway, what you seem to be saying is that most men can become more attractive. I agree, but OP isn't e…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 02:44 PM
3

There aren't that many good women to choose from either, especially nowadays. In this world, there are winners and losers. A lot of men and women are destined to be losers.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 02:33 PM
–

If everyone tried to get rich in a disciplined manner there would still be winner and losers. If every man is a competent leader, then no man is. The bar will always move higher. If we compare ourselves to others, we can't all be winners.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 02:23 PM
–

I agree. That said, you're missing my point: He can, but that doesn't mean he will. Most lack the drive, for whatever reason. Pretty much any individual in the US can get rich if they make the right decisions each day. However, the average person will never sniff wealth. They don't have it in them. People have to overcome trauma (and decades of programming from parents/media/society) and deal with distractions. It's just not in the cards for most.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 02:11 PM
–

Focusing on how men act doesn't change anything, really. The average man will never be "60% alpha" (whatever that means), just like the average woman will never be anywhere close to the ideal woman. The average man is not a sliver-tongued, hyper-competent leader; he's a follower. Either way, OP would say that most women are "sacrificing" attraction. IMO everyone, outside of the most attractive, "sacrifices" attraction to some degree.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 01:58 PM
–

There's just not enough attractive males to go around, and the ugly male propaganda is only making attractive males rarer. It's not that certain women can't compete. It's not that they're too unattractive (either physically or otherwise, or both) to get love and devotion from a modelesque man. It's that the average man is not attractive enough for the average woman — you know, the "rare specimen" who would be with another "rare specimen" if not for a lack of "rare specimens." Right.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 01:01 PM
–

So you're still rolling with the "I have friends" angle? Very insightful. I hate the black pill (and made that very clear in my first post)—don't even know what you're rambling about. None of the people I've been friends with have ever talked about the stupid shit listed in the OP. Questioning your genuine attraction to someone based on what they'd look like without hair (or different hair) isn't normal, and it never has been. It's definitely not normal for mature adults.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 01:56 AM
1

Is that supposed to be insightful? That doesn't change anything I said.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 01:14 AM
2

I don't think what OP presented is common, but your response doesn't make any sense to me. A woman thinks a man is cute but needs to ask herself whether it's just because he's a coworker (or whether it's just because he's not bald), as if a man failing to be objectively physically attractive in every way invalidates the attraction she personally feels towards him. These women are looking for confirmation from other people. That's indicative of a weak sense of self. IMO it's the same type of self…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 07:55 PM
–

Yet plenty of individuals benefit from finding God, or having faith. One of the main purposes of having faith in God is to surrender your burdens (i.e., to let go of things that are out of your control). Embracing adversity as a test and holding yourself to higher standards, rather than chasing short-term highs (like casual sex with strangers), often pays dividends as well. You can't save people who don't want to save themselves. If someone wishes to believe that this (the material world) is all…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 01:55 PM
1

I don't prefer any particular insult. If I had a child and someone was throwing insults at them (accurate or otherwise), I'd have a huge problem with the person, especially an adult, bullying or provoking my kid (or younger family member). But anyone can insult me however the hell they want. I'm right with myself and God. Go for it. Let loose. I'm human being with endless flaws, and I've heard it all. Anything outside of a direct threat is meaningless to me. I'd rather someone show me what they …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:42 PM
8

Just stop taking what they say seriously. Some person with incoherent views calls you insecure — big deal. By giving a shit, you grant them power over you. What did they do to earn that?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 11:14 PM
1

unattractive men hitting on women waaaaaaaaay out of their league Natural selection. Bold men who are always confident in themselves vs passive men who assume they're unattractive — guess who's going to have more offspring on average? I'm not blaming anyone because it's a self-protective mechanism, but there are countless men in marriages with women who are not attracted to them. It is very obvious to me, from the outside, but these men find all sorts of excuses to avoid facing the fact that the…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 12:28 PM
1

I barely know anyone who has that. I'm on the extreme end, but guys like me used to be monks. Some still are. (And in a lot of ways, I sorta live like one.) God knows how many people never experienced what you described. If you have (or if you're currently experiencing it), consider yourself blessed, but life goes on without it. Thanks for the kind words, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 08:33 PM
1

Women hide things as well, and "love" isn't in the cards for most men anyway. IME the only thing that really matters if you're an average-looking man is what you can provide (and are providing), both emotionally and financially, compared to other men who are willing to commit. I was with a woman for 5+ years who found me unattractive. Both sides do it for different reasons, and the person on the other end often won't realize it until it's too late (if ever at all). Men and women value different …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 12:42 PM
2

The point of these scenarios is to try to think about what you value more—in this case, sleeping with a hot woman vs getting affection and loyalty from a hot, pleasant woman. You kinda have to make it extreme.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 04:51 PM
1

If I'm forced to choose, I'd take Option 1 and stack cash together. That said, I don't want to share a home with another person for the sake of it. I wouldn't bother with either, honestly. I got the lovey-dovey nonsense out of my system in my early 20s, and the second option sounds like a turbo-304 that poses too many risks.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 03:21 PM
–

I agree—merely having muscles won't improve your chances that much. But it will improve it. And some men realize that they have a finite time to find a decent, healthy woman and start their own family. If that's what they really want in life, then it's beneficial for them to use that as part of their motivation IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 03:09 PM
–

So? What's the alternative? By going to the gym, he has a shot at getting a much more attractive GF than otherwise. Unless he wants to pay, there's really no other way to improve his chances. And, as you said, if going to the gym increases his confidence and gets him to socialize more (and sharpen his social skills), it maxes out his chances entirely. Otherwise, he can keep an average physique and have little to not shot at dating anything other than an unhealthy woman (again, unless he becomes …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 03:02 PM
–

Most men are considered ugly by most women anyway. If an average-looking dude wants to get with women, he might as well focus on what he can control to a significant degree: physique, social skills, grooming, and money (requires a bit more luck). The average man is never going to be handsome (and the average woman is not going to get commitment from a handsome man). He has to deal with reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 02:48 PM
4

Yeah, I'm sure if you surveyed everyone, the vast majority would "prefer" to be fit — but, somehow, most in the US find themselves to be fat. If only all humans could resist all unhealthy, irrational temptations, especially those that are normalized by their culture. Certain things about "304s" or "bad boys" make them irresistible to many individuals of the opposite sex, even when those individuals know that those options are bad long-term. (Also, a lot of people believe they are the exception.)…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 07:00 PM
1

Last time I checked, Andrew Tate didn't marry an old single mom. If the dude you mentioned in the OP is so high value, why are his results so average?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 01:14 PM
4

LOL. A high-value man would be capable of getting with a high-value woman. Nothing about either of these people screams "high value." Are you saying the money alone makes the man "high value"? Is a 5'4" average-looking dude who inherited his father's wealth "high value" as well? Or is he just a walking wallet to use and discard (which is probably what a lot of dark triad women seek)?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 01:09 PM
4

There's no need for me to imagine when most of the guys I know feel the same way. Of course women are going to value the most physically attractive and exciting men more. There's a reason those men don't need to demonstrate unbridled loyalty or have a steady job. It's common sense. Wanting to be "husband material" in a secular culture just makes you naive IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 11:52 AM
3

I'm a man who doesn't do anything of those things. But here's the thing: I'm a broken man (on some level); my ex-fiancee (who I trusted more than anyone else) cheating on me nearly half a decade ago broke my brain. Men who don't do any of the things you listed aren't really interested in being in romantic relationships with women; either they never have been or they lost the desire along the way. A man isn't supposed to be like this. If every man were like me in this particular way, humanity wou…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 10:26 AM
1

Exactly. Originally, she wasn't even leaving room for any exceptions. She's attempting to wiggle her way out.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 10:09 AM
6

Based on what you said, it doesn't seem like you respect men as individuals. What you're doing is the farthest thing from showing an individual man respect, so it's laughable to paint yourself as morally superior in this case.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 10:02 PM
1

I didn't ask anyone to be outraged, and I hate Big Pharma. However, I asked a simple question in response to the other poster saying that the murderer did no wrong: At what point does murder become "wrong"? Also, do you want to live in a society where it's normal for any individual (or group) to determine (without due process) that a person no longer deserves to live and take matters into their own hands? I don't.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 04:56 PM
6

complaining about how desperately horny and sexually deprived they are That's only some men. So we’re surprised when men turn down the very thing they obsess over Just because an attractive woman is attractive to most men doesn't mean that a random woman (average or below) is attractive (or worth the effort) in the eyes of a random man. Some men are willing to sleep with almost any woman, and some men would rather commit their energy to a woman who's worth it in the long run. How is that surpris…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 02:44 PM
–

Luigi did nothing wrong. Lunacy. At what point does murder become "wrong"? Perhaps you believe that you (or anyone who shares your views) have the right to determine which human beings should live (outside of a self-defense situation and without due process).
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 02:27 PM
3

I mean, we agree there. But I'm not the one claiming average men can't get average women - men here are. I'm not either. My belief is that average men can get occasional LTRs with average women. But if she doesn't want that average dude, why is he still average? Because she's one person. Just because my ugly ass doesn't find a particular female celebrity attractive doesn't mean that she wouldn't be above average if you surveyed the entire male population and compared her results to those of the …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 05:41 PM
1

Yes, and if average men were average, they'd be getting average women. Based on what I see around me, average men are getting into occasional LTRs with average women. Based on statistics from Pew, the vast majority of men are in LTRs after a certain age. The men who can't get into occasional LTRs with average women are below average. This is still essentially saying men get to determine their own leagues and women's. "I determine I'm average so you should want me even though you don't." Flat-out…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 04:42 PM
2

You're right, and it does work both ways. But what determines whether a man or a woman is average is how they compare to most people of their own sex. If all women have little to no issue getting sex, then the question is, which women are getting a lot more from the most attractive men than the vast majority of women? Those are the above-average women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 04:19 PM
4

Exactly. Forget 1%, though. Most won't ever secure one with a top 20% dude. Those men are out of the average woman's league when it comes to stable LTRs. If a woman can't secure a stable LTR with an above-average man, then she is not above average. If the best she can do is an average dude, she's average at best.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 02:48 PM
3

That and the fact that most women are flat-out incapable of securing a stable, serious, long-term relationship with a wealthy man or a hot man.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 01:51 PM
9

Oh, I see what she meant by that comment now. What I was trying to say is that women can easily pair up with average men if they choose to do so, but the vast majority of young women are not pairing up with wealthy men. The vast majority of average young women are pairing up with average young men in long-term relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 01:13 PM
5

Yeah, if we're talking about long-term relationships, then average young men would pair up with them easily.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 12:14 PM
23

If that were the case, most young women would be dating wealthy, hot men. However, most are not, so they're average. Most of the young women that are called 'average' are not. Your 'SMV' match as a fit young man is not always a fit young woman, because youth and fitness are far more important in a partner to men than they are to women. This is true. That said, older women can get pumped and dumped by wealthy men, too. Women always have higher SMV. RMV is a separate issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 11:46 AM
2

Oh yeah, it was real. When I scanned my passport, the alarm started screeching and the lady at the computer, who had just flashed me a giant smile, began scowling at me and refused to tell me what was going on. Then they gave me the full treatment. It was absurd. Another tall, clean-cut, 20-something YO dude got the same treatment. They were waiting for me to land as well. What made it worse was that I'd gone at least 24 hours without sleep at that point due to a 12-hour ride in a stuffy, packed…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 04:10 PM
2

Unreal. So sorry to hear. I remember seeing a video during the riots of 2020 where a couple was pulled out of their home and beaten with pieces of wood by a gang of looters for no reason. I was dumbfounded. After "progressives" took back power in 2021, I flew back home to the States. I had the same designation as Tulsi Gabbard did on my boarding passes. That regime treated me, someone who has never committed a crime (or even received a traffic ticket or missed a payment) like a pile of shit and …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 03:42 PM
1

Trust me — I believe you, and I agree with you. (Also, from the few post of yours that I've seen, you're one of the most grounded and sane posters on here IMO.) In the US, the Dems have been the main ones doing it (for I'd say the last decade and a half or so) because they completely control the mainstream media narrative. To me, the most insane thing about the Kirk murder is not that some lunatic did the vile thing that he did; it's the response from a good chunk of leftists in respectable posi…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 03:26 PM
8

I mean, once you see it for what it is, there's no reason to do it. (And there's definitely no reason to be angry at anyone.) But when I was young, I thought I had to do it to be a man. I was raised to think that's what men are meant to do: suck it up. I realized at a very young age that I was never going to get what I preferred. So I was thinking, "Oh, she's not even close to being the type of woman I actually want? Well, I should go for it anyway, because she's interested in me, and that's rar…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 01:47 PM
2

Because one goal with this type of propaganda coming from partisan hacks (on both sides) is to create a threat narrative — and then lump in their biggest political enemies. This enables virtuous victim signaling. It's one strategy that dark triads use to gain moral authority and social immunity (and, obviously, manipulate others).
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 04:34 AM
1

No. Are divorcees and widows the only ones who fit that description? I wouldn't enter a serious relationship at my age (mid-30s), as I've missed the boat on finding the type of woman I'd want to live with. That's an L on my part. However, if I were in my mid-to-late 20s and single (I wasn't single at that age), I'd look for a woman who had long-term relationships with quality men that just didn't work out. Widows would be fine as long as they didn't have kids; I'm flat-out uninterested in raisin…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/25 03:03 AM
2

We build habits based on what we choose to do on a regular basis. If I'm looking to build a stable long-term relationship, I'd rather invest my time, energy, and resources in a person who has demonstrated the ability to settle with one partner in a long-term relationship over a person who spent long stretches hopping from one partner to the next. Yeah, some people change, but based on what I've seen, most people don't change very much (and very few change at all without grueling effort). And mos…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/25 01:23 AM
3

It's often two different groups of men. I'd prefer women to up their standards, and I'm not interested in a relationship with a woman who isn't physically attracted to me. I think men who've already been in serious relationships with women tend to have higher standards and less of a starry-eyed view of relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 10:15 PM
7

It's much more likely for women to compromise by getting with men on their level. The vast majority of men aren't anywhere near "Chads," and the vast majority of women are in relationships with men. Very few women stay single with cats.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 09:32 PM
2

Plenty of men are aware of it as an option. And many of them will grow to accept it in the future whether or not they see it as an option now.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 09:12 PM
4

Because it's pointless.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 09:10 PM
1

But the actual topic of discussion has everything to do with initial attraction, so it's easy for someone to assume you're actually somewhat attempting to participate in a relevant discussion instead of having a super-serious one-on-one interaction with a dude who's asking whether most men should even talk to women. Maybe ask better questions?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 09:10 PM
8

How is that worthy of a post? You're telling a bunch of 20-something year old dudes filled with testosterone to "just accept a dignified solitude." LOL. Just accept solitude, bro. Accepting it takes a level of maturity, self-control, and perspective that most 20-something people don't have.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 08:59 PM
6

So you just like them and like being around them? A dude might as well marry his male best friend and split the bills at that point.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 08:51 PM
2

I'm not going off on a tangent at all. I'm on topic (even when it comes to the overall post). This was your question in this particular thread: Do you think of all the women in relationships, only a 10% is attracted to their partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 08:43 PM
2

I responded the question you asked. It didn't say anything about "talking." And you're not sure why I'm bringing it up? Do you want me to quote it again? OP is talking about immediate attraction. That's mentioned in the initial post.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 08:29 PM
3

I was responding to your comment. Like OP, I don't think most women were viscerally and immediately attracted to their long-term partners. This is OP's quote: Women at large don't have visceral and immediately sexual feelings about the overwhelming majority of men. If you're an average-looking dude (and the vast majority of men are), then there's no reason to expect a woman to be completely obsessed with you based on looks alone. She might become obsessed with you based on your job, personality/…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 08:22 PM
8

In most cases, I doubt they were viscerally and immediately attracted to their 5'10" husband with love handles and unremarkable facial features. OP's point is that most men (i.e., average men) aren't immediately attractive to women. I think OP is right about that. Women here say it all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/25 08:06 PM
1

Money is often important for men to have, whether or not the woman can even give him a family.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 08:43 PM
1

So why don't you believe that women are morally superior? There was an older, childless woman on here that I interacted with quite a few times. I think she was in her mid-40s, but she deleted her profile (username had Mireya in it) a while back after it seemed like she was spiraling and dealing with some shit IRL. She was cool AF, but even she made it clear that money was still important.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 03:54 PM
1

Neither one of us can prove anything here. I don't really know how you want me to find these comments given that I read only a few posts on here each week and don't save anything. If you want to pretend that older women don't care about money, that's fine. I'm not buying it. Women are not morally superior.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 03:45 PM
1

The only time a woman says a guy has to earn enough is when she wants children because again - that will lead to economic issues for the woman. Not at all. Even 40+ women who can't give a man his own family still want the man to earn more than them. Whether or not an average or below average woman can obtain a stable relationship given those demands is a separate issue. I'm not going to dig through this subreddit. I don't save comments. If you're going to pretend that most women just want a genu…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 03:36 PM
1

Where do you see women complain about men not earning enough? All over the place, even on here. Even when a woman isn't giving a man his own family, she still wants him to have a certain level of money and status, unless she's a badboy chaser. Don't pretend like men just want connection. I've never pretended that all men just want connection. I think, for the most part, men want sex from average-looking women and women want status/money from average-looking men. Very few on both sides want a gen…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 03:26 PM
1

I'm not convinced guys in general prioritize genuine connection any less than women; women just prioritize status and money over sex with average-looking men. It's a challenge for average-looking young men to get laid, so the men who really want it are going to complain about it. Women don't complain about that because it's easy for them to obtain; instead, they complain about how most men aren't good looking enough or earning enough money. Genuine connection is very rare and foolish to chase pa…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 03:06 PM
1

Men are obsessed with getting sex, and a good chunk can't get it without providing compensation—which, again, takes time to accumulate. However, that's talked about frequently. Within both groups are people who prioritize genuine connection.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 01:50 PM
3

My point is that it's not just because young men aren't seeking commitment early. There's another side to it: Women don't want young, average men without money and other masculine traits. However, money takes time to accumulate. Status takes time to build. Confidence and poise take time to cultivate. Few 20-something YO men fit the mold. Men have to scale the wall to become worthwhile, and they often lose their starry-eyed romanticism in the process. I think our society would be infinitely bette…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 01:24 PM
3

Then why would women in their 20s commit to guys in their 20s either? Doesn't make sense either. Exactly. That's my point. Women want compensation ($$$) from average-looking dudes. It's just most can't get commitment from wealthy men. Cheating has nothing to do with the commitment either. It's not a case of "men bad, women good."
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 12:55 PM
6

Why would men (in general, of course) want to commit resources to women in their 50s over women in their 20s? That doesn't make any sense. Most young men want to be in committed relationships. Also, young women admit to cheating at the same rate as young men. It's not a case of "men bad, women good."
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 12:50 PM
4

The older the women are the less likely they are to be in relationships. Yeah, and for men, the opposite is true. We've covered this already.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 12:45 PM
3

Women are seeking commitment early while men in their 20s dont want to commit and be a good partner. LOL. Commitment from which men? If men below 30 were ready to commit and be good partners women wouldn't have to date slightly older men. Women want men with money, and careers take time to build. Not after menopause. After 30 its basically equal. "Basically equal" (meaning that women are still more likely to be in relationships) still doesn't line up with what you said.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 12:22 PM
3

Yet women are more likely to be in romantic relationships than men until after menopause. It's almost like women are valued for looks and fertility and men are valued for status/usefulness/money. Most women don't prioritize finding a "good guy" (whatever that is). They prioritize status, dough, size, and looks (to a lesser extent than men). Women are not perpetual victims, and they're just as slimy as men (just in different ways).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 11:26 AM
27

I don't feel worthy for the type of women I find worthwhile. On top of that, I don't find the average relationship to be worth the effort, and at my age, it seems like the most virtuous women have already been taken (just like the vast majority of the most handsome and wealthiest relationship-minded men have already been taken). Also, young men tend to be more starry-eyed about the potential experience. Older men know what they're dealing with. The fantasy is gone. They're very unlikely to jump …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 03:32 PM
1

No, you're right: Both sexes focus their messages near the top. The one I posted mentions that too. However, almost all women received messages here (and almost a fifth of men didn't). Also, I wanted to include that bit because people here often talk about how women still message guys they view as unattractive, according to some sentence in the OkCupid blog about their data.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 03:16 PM
5

Where are all these hot dudes who are chubby chasers? LOL. How am I supposed to answer this? Ask the chubby women who admit to sleeping with hot guys. A lot of women here say the average dude is ugly. Does that mean average dudes can't find any women? Of course not. Also, just an FYI, this is an absolute claim: This is "women only swipe right a small percentage of time therefore they must all be swiping right on the same percentage of men" fallacy. You're presenting the weakest possible position…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 06:32 PM
7

That is the red pill claim, which is what this post is refuting. Even then, you're attacking the weakest possible position that's easy for anyone to refute: absolute claims. That's kinda lame and pointless. (IMO if you're not steelmanning, you're ego-tripping, but w/e.) So people are broadly dating laterally until they get married when women suddenly go up? I think it's definitely a lot more common in dating. A wise man with money might be willing to date broke hot chicks but won't marry them. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:06 PM
-3

No shit. IMO modern feminism, in its current form, is little more than a self-worship cult — and they're useful idiots (as are black pillers).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:59 PM
6

This is "women only swipe right a small percentage of time therefore they must all be swiping right on the same percentage of men" fallacy. I never made that claim. This completely contradicts the other popular red pill claim that women only date "up." I think only a braindead idiot would say that women only date up. But that quote has to do with marriage, not dating. And they're talking about spouses (you know, married people). It's common sense that in a monogamous society, the guys at the top…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:43 PM
16

There is data from Kreager et al. (sample of 8,000+ men and 6,000+ women on a dating app) suggesting that the vast majority of men on dating apps are viewed as below average in attractiveness (Figure 2). Ten times as many men as women received 0 messages, and all but 2% of women received messages. Less than 10% of women in the lowest quintile of desirability sent messages to men at similar desirability levels, and more than half of them sent messages to men in the top two quintiles. Now, if we'r…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 03:54 PM
1

No, that's what you're trying to do. You're trying to force the second sense, for whatever reason, and make false claims like "familiarity implies a personal connection." You admit it's false statement but stand by it anyway. Oh, that's right — when I said that people are familiar with J-Law, I must've meant that they have a personal connection with her, because the average person has personal connections with super-wealthy celebrities. Just like when I said they saw headlines of people, it mean…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 12:29 AM
1

And I even addressed that by pointing out that you're conflating the two. LOL. Absolutely ridiculous. I'm using one sense ("familiarity with" implies no personal connection, which was made clear already). For some reason, you said that familiarity implies the other sense—which, frankly, doesn't make any sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 12:04 AM
1

familiarity still implies a personal association This is just flat-out false and easy to check. The word "familiarity" has two different senses. Yeah probably, but if someone said "hey, that one woman that you see at the grocery store sometimes just released some nudes on Reddit," I'm not whipping out my phone to track them down. You're not even trying to make a decent comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 11:40 PM
1

I'm not saying women shouldn't be choosing hot guys. (IMO we'd all be better off if they only went for the hottest and richest guys who are virtuous.) I'm saying dudes shouldn't give a shit about "natural selection," because even if you're a fit, responsible dude with a decent job who pops out a couple of kids with an average or ugly woman, the most manipulative and irresponsible hot men (and, in some cases, not-so-hot men) are still outbreeding you. They're spreading their seed with more women …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 08:31 PM
1

I guess if someone asks you, "Are you familiar with Oprah Winfrey?" you'd say, "No." Is that right? Limited familiarity exists, and a lot of people fall for personas and characters. (I believe that's even more common among the people who would seek this out, but I could be wrong). You don't need to be personally or intimately familiar with someone to have a level of familiarity. Because they wanted to see a famous woman naked. A very attractive woman they're familiar with, yes. I doubt a woman w…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 07:01 PM
1

Yeah man, people were googling "Jennifer Lawrence nudes" because they just wanted to read articles about it. Are you serious? Common sense would indicate that they saw the article headline or social media post title and then googled it. But they aren't familiar with them. They don't know anything about these women, other than what they look like and how famous they are. They've seen them in movies, music videos, and interviews. They know who these women are. So when an article or a social media …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 06:38 PM
1

You're literally agreeing with me, you're just trying to argue that it doesn't count the same way it does for women because of reasons. Are you dense? I'm not agreeing with you. I agree that more people are going to Google the famous person after seeing them mentioned in a headline or hearing about them on social media. And I think that men are attracted to seeing women they're familiar with do risque things. Yes, it's not a surprise that someone who millions of people know about will have milli…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 06:11 PM
1

It indisputably was their fame, and I've even demonstrated it to you multiple times. No, you haven't demonstrated anything other than the fact that name recognition will attract more eyeballs due to the fact that people recognize the person. And that's common sense. said for the purposes of our current discussion (and I'm going to guess the vast majority of discussions), your beliefs match those of red pill. Completely false (and slimy). I just explained why, yet you keep smearing. For some reas…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:55 PM
1

Because recognition is not a requirement any other time in consuming porn. But most porn doesn't make the headlines. In those cases, it's not a big deal because the internet is littered with people that nobody can recognize. Again, nobody would have a reason to seek out someone they don't know exists. What made this different was that the women were recognizable. You're claiming it's because of the fame; I'm saying it's very possible that fame has little to do with it. So you're saying their fam…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 02:43 PM
1

How do we know which ones got the most views overall? How can we make that claim? Again, here's the thing: How do we know it's not just the case of "A hot woman I recognize is doing something naughty"? Unless I'm missing something, that Wiki page doesn't have much info. Among the ones named are J-Law, Kate Upton, and Kelly Cucuo — all three of whom are drop-dead gorgeous. Aside from Kirsten Dunst, those are the only one I recognize; I couldn't pick the rest out of a lineup. Yeah red pillers love…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 01:57 PM
1

Sure, if you want. So far, you haven't provided anything other than your browsing habits at the time of the leaks (which isn't what I asked for) — and your word doesn't mean much to me given your tendency to misrepresent the truth.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 01:13 PM
1

I don't know. Tell me how you determined which leaks were the most popular. Answer the question.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 12:58 PM
1

How do you know who was popular? Your entire argument hinges on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 12:43 PM
1

The same applies to men and famous women. And average men don't "chase" them either. Some weirdos beat their meat to leaked pictures of them without leaving their homes. Cool, that doesn't disprove my point. It does, because those women are low status. The pictures spread and then came the headlines. You keep bringing up which ones were the most popular. Please do tell how you know this.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 11:26 AM
1

Most women aren't chasing rich and powerful men. Because most women don't stand a chance at landing a stable long-term relationship with rich and powerful men. One night stands? Some of them can land those. Most men don't chase supermodels either. Average dudes don't stand a chance with them whatsoever. However, that doesn't mean that they wouldn't prefer a supermodel version of their wives. Most women would definitely prefer being with a tall, wealthy, powerful, dominant, high-status version of…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 11:06 PM
1

You mean men? No, I mean dipshits. Most men aren't leaking and spreading other people's private pics. Jennifer Lawrence is not in his social circle. Obviously? I never said she was.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:47 PM
5

Kinda. But so what? The most manipulative and least responsible hot men are the most sexually successful, as they spread their seed with the most women. And there's nothing natural about it either, as we're all forced to pay for their irresponsible behavior. If you shack up with some woman and pop out 1-2 kids, you're not even close to being as sexually successful as that type of dude. So why worry about "natural selection"? Humans won't be around forever anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:42 PM
1

If both of their nudes were leaked at the same time, in the same batch, on the same site, the famous woman would get shared more because men are attracted to fame. No, for the most part, they'd get shared more because the dipshits spreading those pics could get more people's attention with the names and faces of celebrities that most people are familiar with. Again, this isn't even disputable. Movies have literally made millions based on the strength of a famous woman appearing nude. Yeah, and a…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:33 PM
1

The celebrities are going to get more clicks because their names and faces are recognizable. It's common sense. Let's say you have a smoking hot gf with a public Instagram. Just because your gf's Instagram pics have a fraction of the likes of a celebrity's pics doesn't necessarily mean the celebrity is more attractive to men in general. Both of their profiles are easily accessible on Instagram. Most men just don't know your gf exists. It comes down to exposure.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:48 PM
1

So...their fame matters. The reason why it matters so much here is that the fame exposes the celebrity to hundreds of millions (if not billions) of people. If her nudes were leaked along with Taylor Swift's, they should be spread equally (or more so if she's more attractive). How? Why would anyone seek them out if they don't even know who the person is? It's not going to make headlines either. But you already know that no matter how hot the barista is, Taylor Swift is going to get spread orders …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 06:59 PM
1

How is that even a serious comment, dude? It's because most people know about celebrity women. We're talking about megastars who've been all over TV, radio, and the big screen. Barely anybody knows who some random chick from Starbucks is. Barely anyone has seen her or interacted with her. Even with women, I think their attraction to certain actors, for example, often has to do with a character they've portrayed in a movie. I just think their attraction to status and wealth is clearly on another …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 06:17 PM
1

Verifiably? LOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 06:02 PM
1

No. Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:56 PM
2

Yeah, that's clear.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:41 PM
2

I've already pointed it out several times. I've even quoted you from earlier.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:39 PM
2

What matters here is the definition of the word and not what's swirling around in your head.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:37 PM
2

one's own importance or ability And you're ignoring this part?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:22 PM
3

Yeah, now read the rest of that definition. Also, do you remember this? It has nothing to do with being rude or boastful.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 05:10 PM
2

So what is that definition? I don't have access to the OED (not paying for a subscription), so I don't know what definition you're using. But here's the Oxford Learner's Dictionary definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 04:41 PM
1

If you knew, why did you choose to misrepresent my view? Men largely do not go to Taylor Swift concerts or buy her albums, there's no parasocial relationship. So? Most men have been exposed to her plenty. Most have heard her speak. I think more men would be interested in their female friends than Taylor Swift TBH. And I think most women would be more interested in a wealthy hunk than their male friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 04:33 PM
2

Which definition of arrogance? Let's say you have two competent players on a championship basketball team. The first knows he's talented and doesn't flinch in clutch situations. He takes care of business on the court (completely locked in), moves the ball around, and hits the game winner. He daps up the other team after the game and commends them for their effort. The second player, his teammate, knows he's talented and balls out, hitting all of his shots. However, he taunts the other team all g…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 04:11 PM
2

If it was just "I wanna see a hot woman naked That's not what I'm saying. I just broke down my view for you in one sentence in my last comment (the last sentence). Again, most men won't know every celebrity woman. In those cases, there's no illusion of familiarity. They don't know anything about their personalities (or personas).
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 04:10 PM
3

Because most men don't know those random low-status women. I'm talking about the men who are familiar (or close) with those women IRL. I think familiarity (or the illusion of it) is what ramps this up.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 03:54 PM
2

If you're not capable, you're incompetent. You can be confident and incompetent. You can be arrogant and competent.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 03:51 PM
3

A person can be both competent and arrogant (and confident).
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 03:45 PM
6

That's demonstrably false You don't think the dudes doing this type of shit would do the same with their low-status female friends/acquaintances?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 03:26 PM
4

Spreading people's personal shit online is abhorrent, but I don't think men's attraction to celebrities has that much to do with status. Celebrities portray certain characters on screen/stage. If those characters/personas vibe with certain men, then those men will find those celebrities more attractive. I think this happens to women as well, but women are also attracted to wealth and power on top of it all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 03:18 PM
1

I don't think about being on my death bed. That's just a sliver of time. When I'm on the way out, I'm going to be sad about dying either way. If my options are to be stay single or date an unhealthy woman who'll be a liability, a single mom who'll be a liability, or a crazy woman who'll be a liability, I'm not going to bother with dating. Living with a person like that (and all of their baggage) makes the quality of my everyday life significantly worse. And I know a lot women feel the same about…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 05:02 PM
2

You didn't say anything about the fact that young women in that age range are much more more likely to have kids than young men in that age range. And that means that those women wouldn't be looked at in that survey. That's the part you left out. Again, you seem to be hell-bent on pushing a narrative. This isn't about you or me. It's about the argument you're making.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 02:14 PM
1

You weren't even interacting with me personally, so this isn't about proving anything to me (LOL. Dafuq?) You failed to provide the necessary context and attempted to use that source as evidence to bolster your argument. That's my criticism. You're trying to push a narrative. That's especially clear given the fact that you're unwilling to address my criticism in any way other than this: I wasn’t trying to prove anything to you. The source establishes a directionally insightful data input.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 02:00 PM
1

Well, yeah, you haven't really proven anything. Again, 34.6% of men have first child between 30 and 49, compared to 18.2% of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 01:45 PM
2

What you're failing to mention is that men are about twice as likely to have their first child after 35. So when you take a random sample of 18-34 YO women and men without children, it's worth considering that more women than men in that age range have already had children. Obviously, ones that have already had kids are not going to show up in those results, as that survey looked at people without children. Therefore, you can't use the results of that survey to claim that men overall are more li…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 01:26 PM
3

You've made this post before. It's not about devaluing friendship. Relationships offer a completely different dynamic, and many people crave it. IME genuine friendships are less transactional than romantic relationships. My dudes will be around after my partner is gone (especially nowadays, where transient and shallow romantic relationships are common). The connection I have with my genuine friends is deeper in many ways — with bite-sized moments of immeasurable closeness. However, we'll always …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 06:11 PM
7

They struggle differently. However, like women, men also struggle to get a solid relationship with a solid person. The average woman isn't likely to be good long-term relationship material either.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 08:54 PM
1

The other guy said most women like a challenge, and you said it's false because you reject men for being assholes. So you represent most women?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 02:42 PM
1

Bingo. I've reached the same conclusion myself. And I've never heard anyone parrot that stuff outside of shitty articles (typically written by radfems) or black pill social media content. In their own communities, it's cool for radfems to shit on men at all costs, and it's cool for black pillers to be as negative as possible. IMO, the people who are actually happy being single aren't online screeching about how happy they are to be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 01:45 PM
1

To strengthen their arguments, they often use the survey that shows how young women are now less likely to want kids, but what they don't tell you is that young women are more likely to have kids earlier (and men are much more likely to have their first child later), so there are more childless men than women in the younger age brackets that are being surveyed.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 01:35 PM
7

so that means 65% of single women aren’t looking for anything and goes against what you’re saying about women not being happier single. Not really. The 2019 Pew survey found that it was mostly the older women (40+) who were significantly less interested in dating. (And you can see that it's the 65+ crowd, which includes a lot of widows, that's pulling most of that weight.) In the 18-39 YO age bracket, it was 39% of single women and 33% of single men who were not looking for any relationships. Ho…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 12:00 PM
–

Finding a woman under 30 who isn't in a relationship or temporarily in between relationships is pretty difficult. A young woman who's not delusional or a bit insane? Yeah, no doubt. Those women are reasonable and have infinite options, so they're never single for long (if ever, honestly). Of course, shy but reasonable single women exist, but they're rare, and you're probably never going to meet them. And IME women are always the ones who ask about your relationship status or why you're single. M…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 11:41 AM
1

No, I wish women would raise their standards (especially for things like responsibility and earnings) and stick to them instead of settling and ruining other people's lives. That would benefit us in the long run, but it's not going to happen any time soon (or ever).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 02:52 PM
1

In general? Not in the West. Very few women will see him as physically attractive on any level. There's nothing particularly wrong with his genes; it's just that his physical characteristics aren't enough to get women excited on their own. He's likely going to click with a few women who'll settle for him due to his personality (paired with his stability and commitment), and he'll likely need to maintain a decent job for that to be the case. Of course, there are exceptions. A small chunk of these…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 02:43 PM
1

Okay, let's try a more straightforward way: IMO, most women want resources/security, good genes, and excitement. In modern society, the average woman has enough resources/security for survival (though not much beyond that). She doesn't look up to the average guy, and she can always snag an average man later in life (and most do). The hot, unpredictable guy (who's very rare due to how men evolved) offers good genes and excitement. So why would we expect the average young woman to find the average…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 02:21 PM
1

Also if the money is only factor (because i don't see anything else) doesn't that mean that women will lust over men with money? Some, I guess. Traditionally, women have sought financial security and power in average-looking men, primarily for survival; however, that doesn't mean it's what women find most attractive. For example, many men find the gentle, sweet, demure woman ideal for long-term commitment, but that doesn't mean they don't lust after the crazy, hot bimbo as well. But it doesn't a…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 02:02 PM
6

It's not really that. It's that a woman wants to look up to a man and get something from him that she can't get on her own. Women evolved to seek men with power and resources. Also, humans aren't necessarily good at making choices that benefit them in the long run. For example, most people in the US are fat because they'd rather choose a sedentary lifestyle and hyper-palatable food over a disciplined lifestyle and nutrient-dense food. When women can interact with exciting, unpredictable hot guys…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 01:21 PM
6

Women desire men who earn more than they do (and have more power than they do). The problem is that we've set up a society in which the average woman earns about as much as the average man (and, arguably, has more social power), so the average woman has very little reason to be attracted to the average man, who's neither exceptionally tall nor particularly handsome. IMO, we can't expect average women to find average men attractive in this setup. Most women still settle for their "equal," just a …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 01:02 PM
2

He's the most honest person I've ever met, and he's always been there when I needed him. We're very close. However, my father is a perfectionist, and it held him back in life. When I was growing up, he was never satisfied with anything that I accomplished. I was always expected to continue excelling. He was also a simp towards my mom, and it cost him quite a bit, especially over the last few years, as she's dragged him down to her level health-wise. Both of their parents lived into their 90s, an…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 05:27 PM
3

Sharp. I learned a lot — about myself, relationships, and human nature.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 01:03 PM
2

There was plenty of failing on my part, for sure, but cheating is a moral failing. It won't happen to me again, that's for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:59 PM
3

Yeah, women are human. I don't blindly trust anything with an amygdala.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:53 PM
3

Nope. Women are human beings, and human beings are very, very flawed. They often cheat because they have fleeting wants, not needs.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 12:49 PM
1

Yeah, it's over. You spent 20 comments to link to a magazine article that discusses the data in my first comment to you — the data which you told me to ignore. LOL. Unreal.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 02:39 AM
1

Dude, you told me to ignore my stats — and now you just linked to an article that references the Pew Research Center data I posted earlier. I've already covered all of this, but you don't seem to be paying attention. The young men were almost twice as likely to be single, so if you do the math, the young women were slightly more likely to either be in a relationship or seeking a relationship, and it was mostly the older women who were uninterested in dating (especially 70+, probably because thos…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 02:23 AM
1

I can't access the WSJ article or study, and the second link just references the WSJ article. Where's the data? I know it's cool and virtuous for lefty feminist chicks to say men and relationships suck, but where's the actual data? Because the entire conversation is about how there are more men on dating apps! You replied to me, not vice versa. Bingo. So why are you bringing up people in relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 02:09 AM
1

This is about what they do while they're single, though, so I really don't know why you keep bringing up what happens after they find someone. That doesn't make any sense. the problem is that when they find someone, whether they are on an app or not, they remove that man from possibly being on the app. LOL. What does this have to do with single people? Neither of those people are single or dating. The man could've been on the app but found a woman IRL who wasn't on the apps — which is likely bec…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/25 01:15 AM
1

The problem with that reasoning though... is that once they become a couple, the man is no longer on the dating app. Understand? I gotcha, man, but the majority of 18-29 YO men are single; most of them are not coupled up for very long. And, again, young people are the most likely group to use online dating apps. The reason I kept bringing it up is because you kept mentioning relationships. At any given moment, most young dudes are not in committed relationships. In the searching phase, average w…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 11:47 PM
2

Nobody would really care if Bill Gates or Bezos entered the room, though. Those dudes are filthy rich, but the average person sees them as nerds. They seem to lack charisma, and they might be more paranoid about gold diggers — who knows. The top rappers and rockstars would draw a much bigger crowd. Marilyn Manson and Lil Wayne, for example, wouldn't have had much success with women without their status, but they attracted a lot of women in their niches when they were at their peaks.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 11:36 PM
0

I mean, Lil Wayne is 5'5" and looks like a gremlin. That dude had a kid with Lauren London (and several other women), and he probably has a line of attractive women at every show. Also, the average woman earns a shit salary. Independent? Uh, yeah, sure. Thriving? No. And the higher levels of status come with power and attention that goes beyond $$$. But the average man will never reach those levels of status, so whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 11:23 PM
1

No. Again, I'm talking about dating. And, again, some men are more skilled (and more attractive), so they can land dates with more women. A skilled, bold (or hot) dude can go on dates with 10 average women, while 10 average, passive dudes can land 0 dates IRL. If both the women and the dudes have reasonable standards, who's more incentivized to seek alternative ways to find a partner or hookup (e.g., online dating apps)? (And that's not even considering that women get a lot of interest on social…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 10:57 PM
1

I'm talking about going on dates, not entering relationships. That's what you're missing. Average women can get dates and hookups with ease; average men can't. If you're getting dates IRL, you're actually going on dates until you find someone you click with. If you're not getting dates IRL, you're going to be more likely to pursue other avenues to find dates. So if a woman doesn't go on the apps, but still dates, she still removes a man from the apps. This doesn't make sense. What if there are c…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 10:45 PM
1

But a lot of average and below average dudes on the apps aren't getting any interest IRL. And the majority of women, especially kind and warm women, are in relationships, so finding decent single women to interact with is tough to begin with. Meanwhile, any woman who has a social life, regardless of how overweight and lazy she is, has plenty of single men hitting on her IRL. She doesn't need to go on an app unless she has very high (or delusional) standards. If I'm getting dates and hookups IRL,…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 10:27 PM
1

It's simple: Young women don't need apps to get attention from the opposite sex; only really picky women need to use an app. Women get approached IRL, and they can get hookups at any time. The data shows that young men and young women are looking for relationships at a similar rate — and that young women are more likely to be in relationships. The Tea app and the "Are We Dating the Same Guy" groups seem to suggest that a chunk of women are indeed sharing men. Plus, there are more young men than …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 10:12 PM
7

Of course it's rage bait. I was cheated on by someone I trusted a lot. As a result, I haven't had the desire to pursue a romantic relationship in 4 years now, and I'll never trust anyone to that extent again. I have two friends in a similar boat. OP claims that men have accepted settling over being alone, but she hasn't provide any evidence to support that claim. I doubt that most men would be fine with this setup.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 09:48 PM
1

If that ever becomes the norm, a lot of dudes just won't even think about dating anymore. Once some user-friendly, plug and play VR/AI setup takes off (and I'm not saying that's going to be great for humanity in the long run), I think a lot of dudes will be even less likely to pursue romantic relationships with women. Imagine dudes being able to generate a new woman to their liking at any time. Then think about how few of them would choose to go through humiliation rituals just for a chance to l…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 09:33 PM
1

There are more men on dating apps because more women accept being single or not dating Yet more young women (the women most likely to be on these apps) aren't any less likely to date or be single — so how does that make sense? In fact, young women might be a bit more likely to date. Look at the 2022 Pew Research Center survey: 63% of young men (18-29) reported being single (not in a committed relationship), and only half of single dudes were looking to date (either seriously or casually). Only 3…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 09:13 PM
1

According to you, 50% of men are physically attractive, meaning that they're either f-boys or "holistically attractive." I'm not buying that 50% of men are "sexy," especially nowadays with low T and high body fat being the norm. Maybe you're in the upper class, so that might be true for that small group of men — many of whom were born with silver spoons in their mouths and fed optimal diets. I would be able to buy that the vast majority of men can enter the "aren't desirable but also not desirab…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 01:16 PM
-1

Romantic love is a fantasy. "Finding love" just means deluding yourself into thinking that you found it. As long as you're still capable of deluding yourself, you can still find love as a man. Once you've lost that ability, it's impossible to find love IMO. Black pill content is pure brain rot because it puts you in an inescapable negative loop. According to black pillers, all that matters is the one thing that you can't change to a significant degree — and then finding any enjoyment outside of …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 01:55 PM
–

All but one of my five closest friends are fit and well-groomed. Right now, the four most attractive ones are either married or single — half and half. My one and only fat friend has a bunch of GFs every year, but he has very low standards (and he's an alky). The women he dates are physically attractive, but they're also train wrecks with baggage.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 09:59 PM
1

I can believe it. My sociopathic, narcissistic grandpa cheated in his 80s. He even told me about his affairs earlier in life and encouraged me to have mistresses. This happened during a trip I took to Eastern Europe, and my grandma was in the other room with my GF at the time. That was the first time I talked to him as an adult. The dude was charismatic AF, intelligent (spent most of his life as a professor), handsome, and tall, but he was a complete POS.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 01:30 PM
4

Why would you be with anyone if you're not willing to go out of your way to give them the best possible treatment that you're capable of providing? If you're not actually attracted to them on that level, why not stay single instead of using them until something better comes around?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 12:59 PM
3

It still wouldn't be worth shit to me. There's no incentive for me to enter an arrangement like that, and I wouldn't have a desire to stick around. I'd rather be free to do whatever I want (and leave the door cracked for a genuine connection with a grounded woman whose values align with my own — at least for the next decade).
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 10:18 PM
4

No thanks. I'd rather live a drama-free life. I'd feel lonely in that type of relationship with a 304 I'm not emotionally attracted to and a bunch of random dudes I want nothing to do with. Decent woman or bust for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 08:14 PM
1

No, for the most part, they're not getting wined and dine by those dudes; they're getting plowed by those dudes. Those women's "struggle" is having to settle for ugly and fat guys — which involves admitting to themselves that they're ugly and fat. Dating is easier for women. Of course, you can call a fat and ugly chick's experience a struggle in comparison to the experience of the average and above woman; however, from the perspective of ugly and fat dudes, that experience would seem like anythi…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 08:04 PM
1

Some decent-looking dudes definitely hook up with those women occasionally. A lot of men crave variety, and they often go for the easiest option for ONS and short-term relationships. Again, getting dates is not an issue for ugly and fat women; it is an issue for ugly and fat men. A lot of men actually fantasize about fat women; I don't see a lot of women fantasizing about fat men. I'm not defending fat, lazy men. I'm just pointing out that this is not an equal playing field. Women have it easier…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 07:53 PM
1

Again, my point is that you're wrong about those women not being able to get dates. They can get endless dates and hookups — just not stable LTRs with hot guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 07:17 PM
1

I agree. I wouldn't put up with either, as romantic relationships are too much work to justify disrespectful behavior, but I can't take people seriously when they excuse their trashy habits while shitting on the opposite sex for doing something similar.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 03:45 PM
1

So you'd continue doing it as long as he was fine with it, but he would need to stop watching pron in the meantime?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 03:37 PM
1

Maybe, but from the beginning of this comment thread, I was talking about only the cases in which the woman lets herself go.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 03:30 PM
3

Many fat and ugly men do, though. Those men can't get anything else, neither short-term nor long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 03:28 PM
3

They're single because they don't want the dudes who want them for LTRs. I don't blame them, but they're not single because nobody wants them. There are very few fat women who "can't get dates." Getting dates isn't the problem for them. The difficult part is getting serious relationships with men they're attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 02:39 PM
2

If porn is cheating, then reading about tall badboy billionaires is cheating. Amazon is filled with smut that women read while in relationships with average men. I'm not someone who would put up with either, but if a woman thinks watching porn is cheating, is it okay for her to fantasize about other men for hours? By buying these books and reading them, she's going out of her way to feed her fantasies of cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 02:31 PM
1

It's common sense. It doesn't require a study. If someone lets themselves go, why would you expect the other person to be as attracted to them? Is that always the case? Obviously not. Is it the case in the majority of situations? Who knows. But it does happen a lot because many people let themselves go.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 02:25 PM
1

Many? If he's average? No, he's going to need to become far above average in other ways. And he's going to be found attractive by a much smaller group regardless. Female sexuality works differently for the average male, because the average male is not physically attractive; he's not worthy of being selected just for his genes. If a woman encounters an actual physically attractive man — one that's tall, handsome, symmetrical, and of her preferred flavor — it's a different story. She'll be immedia…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 11:25 PM
1

I'd like to see the actual data. As a group, the women rating men showed some preference for thin, muscular subjects, but disagreed on how attractive many men in the study were. How large was the group of men they actually found attractive? What is "many"?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 11:07 PM
1

The average woman has many people of the opposite sex who are physically attracted to her. You can't say that about the average man.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 11:04 PM
1

I'm not a fan of any of the things you mentioned, but I also know that I'm an outlier — in a some ways, an oddball or weirdo. I find both disgusting. In some ways, being obsessed with people who don't even exist is even more disgusting to me. Women act like the dudes who are obsessed with cartoon women. I don't blame you for thinking you're not compatible with men, though. I don't think women are good "life partners" for men, and I think the concept of romantic love is nonsense. I have no intere…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 11:24 AM
1

I'm saying that in a lot of cases where dudes don't want to sleep with their wives, it's because those women have completely let themselves go. IS that always the case? No. But if a woman lets herself go, she shouldn't be surprised when her husband doesn't want to touch her. Same goes for guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 04:11 AM
1

Even if that's true for you (let's just assume you're being honest with yourself), 365 Days broke records on Netflix. Fifty Shades of Grey was the best selling book of the 2010s. It's not a minority of women who fantasize about those types of men while in relationships. It's the vast majority.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 04:03 AM
1

They have a really high divorce rate as well. What "tools" could we possibly give to make them better? If you choose to form a blended family, that's on you. Figure it out. It's a choice; nobody is forcing anyone to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 06:03 PM
1

Most dudes get settled for as well. No woman truly wants to be with an average dude who's not tall, handsome, and well-off; she settles. And a lot of women read and fantasize about billionaire bad boys while being in relationships with average men, so they're far from innocent themselves. Either way, the other person has the option to leave. I think most romantic relationships are dog shit anyway. Very, very few people are capable of genuine love IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 09:05 PM
1

Fit women play the dating game on the easiest difficulty. If a woman chooses to be overweight and lazy, that's on her. It might be time for her to look in the mirror and leave the relationship. In that scenario, both are choosing to be pathetic, and both are putting up with shit that I'd never tolerate.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 08:48 PM
1

She can leave as well — hop on a dating app and upgrade. If she knows he's doing it and isn't okay with it, she should leave. If she stays, she's choosing to enable it. She should look in the mirror and stop making excuses for her lack of discipline and the amount of BS she's willing to put up with.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 08:09 PM
5

How many of those women have completely let themselves go? In those cases, it's a choice. If a man gets shitcanned and refuses to even look for a job, I'm sure his "partner" would find his lack of drive intoxicating.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 07:54 PM
4

There are nowhere near 4 billion women in the average man's pool. Most women live nowhere near you. Most women are not in your age bracket. Most women are not single. (And, obviously, 99% won't even be physically attracted to you whatsoever.) If you want to be vulnerable, work on building friendships with other men. Women come and go — especially nowadays — and if you're not ridiculously handsome or rich, they're few and far between.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 07:37 PM
15

Aren't there obese women on the site making millions?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 06:16 PM
0

Date? Not get on my knees and propose to her? Not share a home with her? Not build a family with her? Yeah, I wouldn't care. It's not serious.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/25 03:58 AM
1

I don't prefer either, and I wouldn't support either. I'd fully support Marxists and modern feminists forming their own country and letting them do whatever they want in there. Just do it far away from me.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 10:41 PM
2

In a handful of cases, maybe.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 05:11 PM
2

It's teaching them that they, too, can change a top 0.00001% man.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 03:05 PM
3

It's a hypergamy fantasy. It's not really teaching anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 02:59 PM
3

Yeah, it's already established that he's the alfalfa of all alfalfas.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 02:55 PM
3

That doesn't take away from anything I said. He's arrogant? Nice. It's just demonstrating the female fantasy of a normal woman winning over the most handsome and wealthiest guy with her super-special personality. It's a hypergamy fantasy written with good prose by a Christian author. It's a story of a traditionally masculine man of high status falling in love with a woman who's not traditionally attractive herself.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 02:18 PM
1

I don't support outright abortion bans, but unless feminists agree that abortions should only be used for extreme medical reasons, I have no interest in allying myself with them over this issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 01:06 PM
1

I support them for medical reasons. But I find all other reasons off-putting.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:59 PM
6

Dude, that's how Darcy is introduced in the book. We start with the fact that he's tall, wealthy, and handsome — to the point where everyone, including the men, is obsessed with him. Confidence in men is attractive. But that's one component, and far from the most important. Ultimately, looks and power are the most important.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:55 PM
-1

Well, yeah, because those are real men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:30 PM
9

From the book: "Mr. Darcy soon drew the attention of the room by his fine, tall person, handsome features, noble mien, and the report which was in general circulation within five minutes after his entrance, of his having ten thousand a year. The gentlemen pronounced him to be a fine figure of a man, the ladies declared he was much handsomer than Mr. Bingley, and he was looked at with great admiration for about half the evening." Say what now? He was just the tallest, most handsomest, most riches…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:14 PM
8

I never denied that. Like I said, it's the classiest version. That said, a man can be as confident as it gets. If he doesn't have money, looks, or height (or a kickstand and a rap sheet), women aren't going to care. And if Darcy were the average-height, average-looking, average-earning man strutting around with all the confidence in the world, he'd have zero appeal as a fictional man.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:01 PM
12

Those men are also usually filthy rich, tall, and handsome — the top 0.000001%. And Darcy? You're presenting the classiest and most socially acceptable version of those fictional men. Often, what's really popular are morally reprehensible POS (who are also filthy rich, tall, and handsome).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 11:40 AM
9

Men are already competing with fictional men (as well as amalgamations of real men). And these fictional guys are often complete POS. They're not masculine men that good men would look up to. Truth is, very few women are worth having a relationship with, and most of those women are already in stable relationships (and have been for a while). If a woman truly wants a stable and healthy relationship, she can have it; however, she usually doesn't actually want it. Most women want what the herd want…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 11:23 AM
1

I mean, if that's the primary issue for you, do your thing. That's your business. However, I wouldn't want to be with a woman who'd be willing to get an abortion, so that issue is not something I wish to ally myself with feminists over.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 10:30 AM
2

Men need a movement that would be able to cooperate with feminism - not fight with it. Do I think women should have equal rights? 100%. But they already do in the West. Modern feminism in the West is a self-worship cult. And the MRA "movement" is absolutely useless. Either way, I think this soft period is a blip. Human history (and the worst of human nature) speaks for itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 01:55 AM
1

What's attractive to women are traditionally masculine men, and given that women (and the highest status men) are the ultimate selectors, traditionally masculine men will reproduce the most (and with the most women). Traditionally masculine men are just meant to thrive in this world, period. Also, a group of men starting a movement that counters the negative influence of society will be viewed as a legitimate threat by the most powerful individuals and groups (unless it's a movement that unwitti…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 11:35 PM
6

I don't think the average woman is that mature. IME there are plenty of introspective men as well; it's just they're often invisible (to women especially) because that's not what women (and other men) consider to be masculine and alluring.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 01:26 PM
9

Most people do the same thing. When a person brings something up about women in general, women (all over Reddit, especially) respond by claiming that it's because of society and how women were raised to think and behave. Often, it's because of "the Patriarchy." It's rarely admitted that each individual makes choices each day. That said, while I don't resent "the Sisterhood" or simps who twist themselves into pretzels to make sure men are blamed for everything wrong in society (I understand why t…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 01:04 PM
2

Yeah, my life has been more challenging as an ugly dude who grew up in a poor family. Most people assume the worst about me (as a man) — until they get to know me. As a result, I take less for granted and can enjoy the smaller things in life without being obsessed with external validation or relying on others for contentment. But am I granted special privileges by society? LOL. FOH.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 11:11 AM
2

I'm not 7 feet tall and 400 lbs of pure muscle, so there's always a bigger and stronger dude out there. I'd rather stay strapped. Yeah, we live in a relatively low-trust society, but the world isn't that dangerous for most of us. Of course, some things are unpredictable, but wise people generally know which areas and situations to avoid.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 02:05 PM
2

Staying fit and learning a martial art? Awesome. But constantly sizing up other dudes and looking to fight dumbasses over absolutely nothing? LOL. I'd rather just carry. If a man wants to act like an aggressive, violent, unhinged animal in the wild, he can get treated like one.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 11:07 AM
2

It's two percent of American women between the ages of 18 and 45, which is probably about right. There are 4-5 million creators. According to the latest count, approximately 1.4 million are American, and 70% of them are women. A decent chunk are probably over 30. To put that into perspective, there are approximately 34 million female Zoomers in the US alone, and definitely over 34 million female Millennials. Sure, 1 million American women is bad, but it's not that bad yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/25 11:28 AM
–

better to be hookup material than husband material Nowadays, that's a fact. Maybe it was always true. What makes being the long-term dude bad is that it takes so much work and sacrifice for such little ROI. And all the appreciation you do get is phony, because she gave all that and more to dudes who did none of what you're doing (and, honestly, she'll probably do it again). The cat is just out of the bag.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 11:25 AM
2

My ex had several family member and friends who would only post about their perfect lives on social media. Behind closed doors, they (including her sister, who was at our place every week) were spiraling, so I rarely take what these people say online seriously. Feminism in the West has evolved into a self-worship cult where women earn status from exclaiming how amazing and powerful they are and demeaning men. The well-rounded and content people I know typically aren't anywhere near as boastful a…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 10:39 AM
–

I hope youre not an American saying that, I am. I live in the South, too. Although I'm an American citizen and have lived two-thirds of my life in the US, I was born in Eastern Europe and have always felt most attracted to Eastern European women. There just aren't a lot of Eastern European women where I live. Also you: I meant the "hate for pets" part. Obviously, obese women and single moms are very common, especially in the singles pool after 30 (and especially in the South).
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 10:17 AM
4

Many women probably do. But if I'm in great shape, make good money, and know that I'm going out of my way to do the right thing each day, I couldn't care less about an average person thinking I'm a loser or a bad person. I know genuine losers who get plenty of women; those men often just don't have any standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/25 09:15 PM
–

I see them as beautiful, but I'm not actually attracted to most of them — probably for some of the same reasons. However, I find a handful of them ridiculously attractive, such as Ana de Armas and Bryce Dallas Howard. The plastic surgery addiction definitely doesn't help, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 08:52 PM
2

IMO if you truly love yourself, you do whatever it takes to put yourself in the best position to thrive given your limitations and opportunities (and only you know what thriving means to you). It's your responsibility to find opportunities. And if your perspective makes you unhappy, then it's your responsibility to shift your perspective/focus and take action, because the world is never going to bend to your will. Take control what you can or embrace misery; either way, the rest of the world won…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 07:56 PM
1

It's a two-point percentage gap. Do you think that older men are more deviant than younger men?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 03:03 PM
1

So? You can't make sweeping claims about men under 50 because the difference in cheating rates between young men (under 50) and older men is stark, and a two percentage point gap doesn't cut it. Make the claim about men over 50 then. You're not even willing to answer whether you think older men are more deviant than younger men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 02:30 PM
1

Except there's a big difference between the cheating rates at 18-49 and 50+, so attempting to lump it all into one and then focusing on the overall relative difference doesn't give us an accurate picture what's going on during women's fertile years (up to 50). A two percentage point gap is not enough to make a sweeping claims for men below 50.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 02:25 PM
1

There's a 1-2 point gap until 50. No skin off my back, dude. You're attempting to mislead with sweeping claims based on age-driven relative differences (older men show much higher rates compared to younger men), and you're just ignoring basic questions. It's not like I'm getting anything out of this interaction either.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 02:11 PM
1

It is happening to some extent. I think many younger dudes crave structure and order. I was raised Catholic and always thought religion was bullshit. Leading up to my first communion, our priest showed us a photo of his X-ray with Mary holding up his spine and tried to say that she was responsible for his successful surgery. That was a bad start, and all of the exorcism lectures at Sunday school just made me lose respect for them even more. I stayed in the church until I got confirmed at 16, as …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 02:05 PM
1

To say that men are more deviant partly because of a 2-point gap? Two out of a hundred supports sweeping claims? You're also ignoring over the entire population, men are 50% more likely to cheat. You're taking a relative difference, which is mostly driven by older men and women (50+), and applying it to all age groups equally. And again, do you think that older men are more deviant than young men?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 01:34 PM
1

So the 2-point gap is enough to make broad generalizations?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 01:17 PM
1

...infidelity rates clearly show that women are not as deviant as men. And you claimed this. So if a 2% difference justifies broad generalizations (LOL), you would say that old men are more deviant than young men because they cheat significantly more?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 01:01 PM
1

Until 50, the data doesn't show a strong gap, as a 2% difference is barely statistically significant. They cheat at roughly the same rate from 18 to 49.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 12:36 PM
1

Cheating after 30 still counts Until we're nearing grandma and grandpa status, women admit to cheating at the same level. Perhaps OP thinks old men are more deviant than young men? The closest it is to "even" is the youngest age group Uh — what? In that group, women cheat more. The next two groups, men are slightly (2%) more likely to cheat.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 12:17 PM
5

obese women or single mom and suddenly they act as if that's below them If you're a childless, fit man with a decent job, it is below you (unless you're a chubby chaser, of course). Why raise another man's child or date a woman who's unhealthy and lives an incompatible lifestyle? Get off Tinder and meet people elsewhere, rather than compete in the meat market that doesn't exactly allow average-looking men to stand out. Or stay single until you find someone who's actually compatible and not a com…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 11:37 AM
2

It shows that over the entire adult population, men are 50% more likely to cheat. Yeah, and during their fertile years, women are nearly just as more (or more) likely to cheat. It's damn near (12% vs 11%, 12% vs 14%, 14% vs 16%) even until 50. where these contradictory red pill views are never held by the same people, yet these people never debate against the opposing view either. Yeah, it's kinda like I never see blooper posters like yourself debate other bloopers who spout nonsense. You're not…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 11:12 AM
0

Let's say "not fat" then. Only a quarter of 20-24-year-olds are overweight, and a small chunk of those men are just muscular, which puts them in the overweight range of BMI.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 11:09 AM
1

What study are you referencing here? The Institute for Family Studies one that used GSS data from 2010-2016. (I know far leftists hate that source, so I'm sure IFS rigged the results to paint young men in a more favorable light than older men.) I didn't say anything about conformity. Ultimately, that's what we're debating here. If you disagree with OP's argument, fine. Feel free to disregard then. Edit: Data came from GSS.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 01:11 AM
3

Right (and I was talking up to 50), but for the entirety of their fertile years, women admit to cheating about as much as men. Also, just because you cheat on your husband or boyfriend doesn't mean you're not generally a conformist. Cheating is done in the dark. A lot of people conform to boost their social status or to appear as a "good" person (both to others and themselves). A married Christian in a Christian community can still cheat on his wife with a dude, for example. So it comes down to …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 12:41 AM
0

Young women have similar self-reported infidelity rates. Only once women become infertile do they report cheating significantly less. So when it comes to the age range of the average male poster here, it's pretty even. And we can't measure emotional abuse, which is what women tend to resort to given that they're significantly smaller and weaker on average.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 12:22 AM
1

No, it's just that women tend to marry a few years older. Of course, a small chunk of women could be sharing men. Also, second marriages result in significantly bigger age gaps. According to Pew Research, 5% of men's first marriages have a 10+ year age gap, and 20% of their second marriages do — so a good chunk of those 40-year-old divorced dudes are likely dipping into the 30s dating pool. Then consider that there are about three extra men for every 100 women between 20 and 39. And like I said,…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 11:59 PM
1

I said between 18 and 49. I figured you knew what survey I was referring to, as it's been posted like 1,000 times on here. Yes, it's 66% for 18-29 and 83% for 30-49. So between 18 and 49, it's definitely 70-80%. And that's just committed relationships — at least, from the woman's perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 11:37 PM
1

So few women are doing it because most young women are in a committed romantic relationship. They get approached by plenty of guys IRL. For the most part, only the pickiest young women go online. Between 18 and 49, like 70-80% of women are in committed relationships according to the latest Pew survey. A lot of men in their 20s are single, and since men have to approach to have even one option, it makes sense why there are more men on those apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:55 PM
0

This isn't about me; I'm in my mid-30s anyway. I realized I'm not getting what I want a from a woman a long time ago. I'm asking you about dudes in their 20s. Average joes and millionaires alike are chasing after the same small % of pretty young women. Millionaires are chasing everyone but overweight, infertile women? LOL. Most of them are not chasing average 20-something women for long-term relationships. And a lot of male millionaires are far from physically attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:45 PM
-1

I don't expect anyone to want me. My last ex was a lot more attractive than me (or the average American woman) anyway. But are you saying that the average but fit young dude's equal is an overweight, infertile woman? Maybe for short-term relationships, but for long-term relationships, I'm not buying it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:36 PM
-1

Women aren't expected to pursue, and they don't have to pursue. That's all I'm saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:24 PM
0

The average but fit dude's "equal" is an overweight, infertile woman? In that case, dating is a wrap. Also, why would men approach women they're not attracted to? By doing so, they're just wasting everyone's time.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:22 PM
-2

Yeah, you play the passive role in the conversation. A dude has to rizz his matches. It's not the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:10 PM
12

I agree, but that's just how it works in modern Western culture. Women can playfully clown on broke guys (which really just means "not filthy rich" in many cases) without any major social repercussions. Most normal men stomach it. If you respond as a man, get ready to own the "insecure" label. It is what it is. In an ideal world, we wouldn't have to do many things.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 02:57 PM
4

For sure. In my case, I'm viscerally attracted to women with a certain type of legs. If necessary, I can hyperfocus on that. I don't care what a woman looks like otherwise (or how she behaves); I still find her physically attractive. If I DGAF about anything but getting laid (i.e., if I had an underdeveloped prefrontal cortex), I'd be able to ignore everything else about a woman and put up with it all in a relationship, even if I wasn't attracted to her in any other way. I just don't want to do …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 01:27 PM
21

More importantly, the most well-off men are more likely to be off the market after a certain point. Broke dudes are unattractive, so many of them will be left on the shelf and ignored.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 01:22 PM
13

Because IME some dudes just have to find one thing physically attractive about the woman, even if they find her unattractive overall. Or maybe they find a woman's body physically attractive enough but aren't emotionally attracted to the woman whatsoever. However, their drive is so high that they're willing to put up with it just to get off on the regular. I'd definitely be capable of sleeping with women I'm not attracted to whatsoever — be it physically or emotionally, and to a reasonable extent…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 01:12 PM
14

If you're actually angry and bitter, then take accountability. But being brutally honest isn't the same thing. Like I said, I'd never mention anything about not dating single moms IRL (at least not to the average person). I keep my mouth shut about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 12:05 PM
19

Sharing your blunt and honest opinions about dating single moms doesn't necessarily make you angry or bitter, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 11:55 AM
23

I mean, we're on a subreddit that focuses on sex, relationships, and gender issues. We can expect for these things to come up. (And the most mentally stable men and women don't frequent Reddit to begin with.) Also, it's not surprising that people are willing to be more honest and blunt online. You can't really be honest about it IRL. As a man, you're better off keeping your mouth shut about it. I don't think most dudes care how they come off on here. I can see dudes being jealous about fat chick…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 11:51 AM
67

These guys know deep down, they would date these ‘unattractive undesirable women’ because their current situation is NO WOMAN wants them. That might be true in a small percentage of cases, but most childless men can make a long list of genuine reasons why dating single moms is a bad idea in general. I've never even considered it an option, but if other men are willing to do it, that's great. IMO, you have to be either obsessed with sex or pathetically desperate to date someone you find unattract…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 11:30 AM
1

The same men who want us to feel bad about ourselves are usually overweight men with neckbeards and a weird hate for pets. LOL. That's super-specific. Who are these men? I was always into a woman for her mind and personality as well, but how a person — especially a 30-something or 40-something adult — takes care of themselves and their body says a lot about their values, approach to life, lifestyle, and personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 11:11 AM
2

Yeah, any woman can get unlimited dates. That isn't exactly revelatory for most adults. How many decent options would actually take an obese, sloppy single mom seriously, though? (And what are dates worth if any woman, even the ones at the bottom of the hierarchy, can have a never-ending supply of them?) Are there exceptions? Sure. But there are only a certain amount of tall, fit, handsome, and well-off men. Any woman who's that obsessed with attention from men isn't worth commitment anyway IMO.…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 02:02 PM
1

This study is measuring "social desirability" which introduces a whole lot of other factors that I can't comment on. Good point, but I still don't see any real data to support your claim. This part from the shitty blog article you posted is just poorly written and doesn't even make sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 01:24 PM
4

The average man in the US is an overweight simp, so no.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 01:20 PM
0

I'm asking because the peer-reviewed study I posted above seems to show that women's tastes (based on the message distribution) don't vary more than men's. I haven't found any actual data that backs up your claim.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 06:13 PM
1

yet 38 of the profiles were "disliked" by that same group of participants. What does this mean? No offense to you, but that's a crappy article. Do we have any actual data to work with — something that shows that women's tastes are more varied? I mean, even if one Chad was liked by 80%, there could have been more who were liked by 60% or 70%. We already know that very few men are attractive according to women, so there would only be a handful of men in that group of 100 with a high success rate.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 06:07 PM
1

Kreager et al., (2014) found that almost ten times more men than women received zero messages (18% of men vs 2% of women). This was an online dating study published in a peer-reviewed journal with a large sample size (8,259 men and 6,274 women). And based on the message distribution in that study, it looks like women were a bit more focused on the most desirable dudes than men were focused on the most desirable women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 05:55 PM
1

had poor agreement on which guys were hot Can you prove this claim? Kreager et al. (2014) found that almost ten times more men than women received zero messages (18% of men vs 2% of women). This was an online dating study published in a peer-reviewed journal with a large sample size (8,259 men and 6,274 women). And based on the message distribution in that study, it looks like women were a bit more focused on the most desirable dudes than men were focused on the most desirable women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 05:41 PM
2

Mind-blowing, dude. Absolutely mind-blowing.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 05:29 PM
2

Can you please explain? I mean, I know what you're insinuating, but like you, I really need someone to explain.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 05:14 PM
2

First off, I explained my take on this like three or four posts ago. And I literally just said (again) that it's well-intentioned. They lie like religious people lie to themselves. They want to believe so bad, because believing in a just world feels good. They think that giving their kids a rose-tinted view of the world will protect them from suffering. I don't blame them. It's up to the individual to learn everything on their own, as I've said several times already.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 05:11 PM
2

But I did state that it is ultimately a lie (usually a well-intentioned one) — like many replies ago. What are the goal posts?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 05:06 PM
2

No, I was addressing what you wrote. Then you tried to pull it back to the other dude who didn't even write what you claimed he wrote. Catch up, champ.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:54 PM
2

I just posted his comment above. Do you want me to read it for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:42 PM
2

If my grandpa wasn't a player and a ladies man I would've grown up completely blue pill. This is what he wrote — which is probably true. Had he not seen his grandpa behave differently, he would've likely followed the same script as everyone else around him. A lot of people want to believe in a just world, so they teach their kids that the world is just. I know they're well-intentioned, as it's probably a result of trauma, but it is a lie. Ultimately, it's on the individual to figure it out for t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:29 PM
2

It's fine to admit that you were influenced by well-intentioned people at a young age. I'll say it for a third time, because I can see your gears are grinding really hard: People's perspectives and values change over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:18 PM
2

Seems to me that you just post a lot of low IQ nonsense and refuse to engage people civilly (or put in the minimum amount of effort in reading and thinking critically). I'm not a victim, and I never will be. I like to think that every failure that I've had is ultimately due to my own faults and choices, and that's how I choose to approach life. IMO a good man can't exist without accountability. What's ridiculous, though, is thinking that I'd have so much figured out while I was younger.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:14 PM
2

My parents were teaching me about lovey dovey bullshit (for years and years) long before I could even comprehend what the hell my grandpa was even doing, dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:06 PM
2

Yeah, because, like I told you, I was taught to have different values, so my perception of success was different when I was younger. I was raised to value marriage. I don't even watch anime, so I can't help you with that last sentence.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:02 PM
3

It's not a conspiracy. It's about values and cultural programming. My grandpa was a player as well. Growing up, I was told taught that the ultimate "success" was getting married and giving everything to your wife. Only later, after I tried everything that I was taught to embrace, did my perception of "success" shift, and I started understanding my grandpa and his values. Young people don't exactly have everything figured out, obviously, so most of them tend to lean on those around them.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 03:52 PM
3

Lucky bastard Yeah, I know; I don't take it for granted. It was in their own F'd up way, of course. But it was genuine. Unfortunately, because they do everything wrong when it comes to their health, I don't think they'll be around for very long — despite their parents living into their 90s. if I don't get to pour my heart into someone then I don't get the point of anything at all I used to believe that as well, but along the way, I may have poured it into the wrong person. I do wish more people …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 03:48 PM
3

So one of the 4 who had success was the one he didn’t listen to? The opposite. The other dude said he did listen to the one out of the four; from his perspective, his other grandparents lied.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 03:44 PM
4

I got the love I needed from my parents, but I admire your mindset. That said, I don't think it's either "FU, got mine" or "love another person completely." Both are foolish from my perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 03:29 PM
3

I'm not the other guy, but I'm also not dense enough to assume that he was talking about solely fiction books.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 03:17 PM
2

There's more than one definition of romanticism. Maybe do a quick search and figure that out.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 03:04 PM
11

Morally, I agree. Many of them don't die alone, though. This is not a just world, and nobody cares what you or I thinks anyone "deserves." In this world, the only thing that objectively matters is what works. Unfortunately, what works is power.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 02:50 PM
3

Yes, a lot of dudes here know that most men are seen as walking wallets, at best. It can be tough for some people to accept, though, especially with all the romantic bullshit the media (and sometimes family) has fed them their entire lives. Also, I do think that men's tastes vary a lot more, so it's not quite the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 02:17 PM
3

It's different flavors of the same small group of men. Maybe one friend prioritizes height a bit more. Maybe one friend prioritizes facial harmony/symmetry a bit more (not literally thinking like that, but you know what I mean). Maybe one friend prioritizes money a bit more. And maybe each is willing to settle (to a certain degree) in other areas if absolutely necessary. What spreads things out a bit more is the fact that most women can't order exactly what they prefer, because most women can't …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 01:51 PM
6

I ate nothing but steak tartare with eggs, homemade butter, and homemade cheese for about 6 months straight. It's something I'll only admit on Reddit. LOL. But, yeah, you have to be a special kind of weird to order tartare at a restaurant. And you have to be a special kind of weird to be attracted to people that pretty much nobody else is attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 01:28 PM
1

But if she’s in the middle, I might find a girl cute and you might think she isn’t. It's just that women's middle is completely different from men's middle. According to online dating studies, men actually find most women more attractive than average. Women find the vast majority of men straight up unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 01:01 PM
2

I have a GE washing machine sitting to the left of my GE dryer. Moving my clothes to the dryer from the washing machine takes me about a minute. The same goes for moving my clothes to the basket from the dryer. Putting them back in my closet takes like 5 minutes. And I only do it once a week. When I lived in Europe, we washed by hand, so I can see that being a pain (especially with bedsheets and blankets) — but when you have washing machines and dryers?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:32 AM
-2

Except slaves didn't have a choice in the matter, and they weren't being pampered.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:16 AM
1

No it wouldn't. The top dudes wouldn't have a reason to take it, and women would still gravitate towards the hottest and highest status men. Testosterone levels in men have been on a significant decline for decades now, and that hasn't done anything to "even the playing field." In fact, we've probably gone in the opposite direction. Social media, the internet, and smartphones just changed everything.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 12:41 AM
5

Nobody is doing that in this comment thread, though, so you're just making irrelevant statements. If you just want to complain about random people complaining, that's cool.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 12:43 PM
3

If you know you're unattractive, you know your equal is unattractive. Most people aren't attracted to unattractive people. That doesn't mean you'll stop being attracted to attractive people. The person you replied to wasn't even complaining. There's no reason for everyone to pair up. A good chunk of people will be left pining for attractive individuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 12:28 PM
3

It comes down to being human. I don't think many people are capable of being happy with a 25th percentile person. That's far away from anything resembling an attractive person. Below a certain point of physical attractiveness, there's nothing wrong with staying single IMO. Also, considering that a man has to go out of his way to pursue a woman, where's the drive to pursue when you don't even find the other person remotely attractive (and you know the other person doesn't find you attractive eith…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 11:15 AM
8

Because women have so many options IRL that only the pickiest ones have to head to the meat market.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:09 PM
6

They wouldn't crave it as much, obviously, but they would enjoy it. Take away the risk of pregnancy with birth control. For the most part, men just have more varied tastes and DGAF about status markers nearly as much as women do.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 12:59 PM
7

Not if women only find a small percentage of men attractive (and those men tend to have similar immutable characteristics).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 12:41 PM
1

No. Most women aren't in abusive relationships, because most guys aren't abusive. The average woman can easily find a non-abusive average man who's physically attracted to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 12:55 AM
1

For most women, it is that easy, because most guys aren't abusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 10:59 PM
1

Contact law enforcement or reach out to someone they trust. Reaching out to a stranger and offering sex is foolish. Dafuq?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 10:28 PM
1

I said the average woman can easily find an average man who's not abusive and who's physically attracted to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 10:04 PM
1

No, but I also don't think that most women are getting abused by most men. Leave the dude, heal, and then (if you want to date again) go for it. And I looked at your thread. Hell no. That's sketchy AF. I don't want sex from a random woman (God knows what STDs she has), and any woman who's reaching out to a random man (especially a man that isn't particularly handsome) by offering sex in exchange for housing is probably either batshit insane or looking to rob him — or both.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 09:57 PM
1

Dude, if you're "significantly below medium," it means you're considered unattractive. Without a doubt, I'm uglier than at least two of those dudes, even if I'm in better shape or taller (impossible to tell, obviously). Considering that the average dude is probably fatter and presents themselves worse than all four of those guys, it makes sense that 80% of dudes are considered physically unattractive. The average dude's "looksmatch" is basically a bottom 20% woman; most just make up for their lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 09:53 PM
1

My browser doesn't let me access those pages when you post them BTW. This is like the second or third time in the last year that I've run into that issue. Take them in how? I don't "take in" random people.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 09:35 PM
1

Then who were the 4 guys who the writer of the article described as "significantly less attractive than so-called medium" according to women?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 09:33 PM
1

Ok, all kinds of people "mistreat" each other, and individuals will have their own idea of "mistreatment." Women don't really have issues finding men who think they're physically attractive. These days, an average woman can open a phone and find an average dude, one who will likely not be abusive, without any problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 09:19 PM
1

Exactly — it doesn't say that (or explain). Also, look at the photos of the dudes who are significantly less attractive than "average" To women, relatively fit, normal dudes with normal jobs are just flat-out ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 09:14 PM
2

Ok, so that means it doesn't apply in most cases. Then your chances are good of not finding an abuser. In most cases, what's available are just normal dudes, and normal dudes aren't attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 08:42 PM
2

Show me where it says it's done by percentiles and not by the exact same categories they use in the other graphic.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 08:40 PM
2

Most dudes aren't abusers. I'm not going to pretend that they are.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 08:36 PM
2

So now you're just going to ignore what you posted? Your data shows that a female 5 has a better success rate shooting for the stars than a male 7 or 8. What you failed to consider was that 80% of men are on those bottom three lines, whereas only 40% of women are. That's crazy. LOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 08:24 PM
1

Because most men aren't abusers, and most women can open their phone and do better these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 08:19 PM
2

According to that data, 1/4th of the male population is in the two "least attractive" categories compared to only 1/20th of the female population. Less than 20% of the male population is at or above that yellow line (medium attractiveness), compared to 60% of the female population. You do understand what that means, right? It means that the majority of women have a higher success rate in messaging the most attractive people of the opposite sex. Your data is strengthening the opposing argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 08:12 PM
2

Maybe. But the fact that women can easily find a relationship in which the man is physically attracted to them shows that most women are found physically attractive by plenty of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 07:51 PM
0

I mean, a lot of dudes can do whatever and still won't be physically attractive (just "loved" for their money). That's life. At least those women can change their body composition with effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 05:31 PM
-2

No, those women are viewed as sufficiently physically attractive by a lot of men. All they need to do is actually take care of themselves and make an effort. They have the hard part nailed down. No matter how much work a dude puts in, there's no guarantee that a woman will consider him physically attractive. He should do it anyway, for his own sake, but women have it easier finding potential mates, especially if they put in their bare minimum effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 05:07 PM
-3

If someone isn't taking care of themselves and putting their best foot forward in life — which is what any healthy human being does — why in the world would they assume that they're somebody else's first choice? In that case, they're not even bothering to control what's controllable; they're settling for mediocrity in their own life, so they should expect mediocre relationships with mediocre people.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 04:27 PM
2

In most cases, it does mean that, though. You might be an exception, but the average person who stops caring about how they present themselves is unlikely to be someone who has shed their ego. Unfortunately, the average person is just a slob. And how much effort does it really require? To me, the benefits are worth the small cost.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 01:16 PM
2

I don't think you have to be terrified of anything to put on decent clothes. I've been through periods of my life where I didn't care, especially in my early 20s, and that mentality isn't one that I want to embrace again. It didn't benefit me. I get a lot more from holding myself to high standards when it comes to aspects of my life that provide benefits and aspects that I can control (especially ones that require so little effort).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 01:08 PM
2

Terrified? LOL. Come on, dude. I'm not sloppy. I hold myself to higher standards, whether someone else is watching or not. And I do enjoy expressing myself with clothes. Plus, it's probably the easiest thing one can do to benefit socially, so I don't see the downside. When you dress like shit, you communicate to yourself, "I'm a sloppy dude who doesn't give a fuck." If that's the message you want to send to yourself every day, cool. That's not the message I want to send to myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 12:57 PM
2

I guarantee that the vast majority of people who dress like shit and eat like shit feel like shit about themselves. Of course, you shouldn't obsess about what other people think about you, but ignoring reality (i.e., the fact that most people are going to judge you for your appearance) has consequences. Staying fit and dressing well are two things that are completely in the average person's control, and neither hurts the individual unless they're taken to the extreme. You're jumping straight to …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 12:46 PM
2

It doesn't take much effort to put on clean, well-fitting clothes (or, in the case of women, clothes that don't have your fupa and love handles hanging out the front and sides). The first thing people see is how you present yourself. If you present yourself as sloppy, just understand that people are going to see you as such, and your opportunities will be limited. If you're cool with that, good for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 12:33 PM
3

To me, staying fit and dressing well is basic shit. You do that out of self-respect, and if you're not doing it as an adult, then you probably hate yourself on some level. But I'd imagine what's stopping most men is the same thing that's stopping most women from being anything but overweight, sloppy, and social media addicted — and doing anything but living paycheck to paycheck (or relying on men for money).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 12:16 PM
3

In most cases, that depends on how he acts. If the dude gives off the vibe of being desperate to get into someone's pants, yeah, how could everyone else not assume that? It's never been an issue for me. However, I never expect women to find me attractive. I don't expect anything from them. I don't even care if we stop being friends. I'm good either way. uninterested Right. I just don't think you have to be gay or married to give off an "uninterested" vibe.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 05:54 PM
2

I'm calm and warm, I think. If anything, it's just a sign that I'm comfortable to be around. I'm sure plenty of people look down on for being single, but I don't really care.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 05:31 PM
1

Not bars, as I rarely drink. Yeah, I'll get invited to holiday parties (e.g., Thanksgiving), Super Bowls, beach/lake trips, etc. My closest friends are all dudes because I just have more in common with them and enjoy their company a lot more.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 05:18 PM
2

I'm a middle-class white dude in a predominantly Hispanic area. I was born in another country, so neither my name nor my face screams American (even though I'm a US citizen and speak fluent English with a general American accent). I have some of the worst Eastern European male features smashed into one face. Still, most women are very kind to me in person — not at first glance, but definitely after they get to know me a bit. These are women who would never date someone like me. Perhaps upper-cla…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 03:42 PM
3

Falling for it once is understandable. But after 25? After 30? I don't understand the ones who continue to do it. You have to be really out of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 03:41 PM
3

IMO the friend zone is a choice. I don't understand why anyone would choose it. But if you're a physically unattractive man, you're going to be viewed as a source of entertainment and a neutered male by many female friends, especially the ones who are way more physically attractive or higher status than you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 03:23 PM
7

That's how they see a lot of straight male friends too. IME a lot of women like collecting male "friends." I have never really found them to give much of a shit about a man's looks when it comes to "friendship" (from their perspective).
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 03:12 PM
1

Most people are often selfish and often kind. Are they "good"? I wouldn't go that far. They're neutral at best — sometimes good and sometimes vile. The more room they have to be selfish, the more selfish most of them will be. They're not out to get you; they're out to get something from you. It's not personal. You're a means to an end.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 02:14 PM
2

Obviously (almost everyone has aspects they should/can improve), but if you lack enough of the immutable, you're most likely going to struggle or end up being a BFF/wallet at best.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 01:02 PM
4

I think most dudes like that here admit that they lack immutable characteristics that would make them attractive. I don't think there's anything to debate on that front.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 12:55 PM
4

Yes, unless you're very handsome, tall, rich, or low-inhibition as a man, you're most likely going to have very few options. However, many people will infer that you're a bad person, because most people want to believe in a just world to comfort themselves. (Almost always, though, these will be people who don't know you well, so it doesn't matter IMO.) They'll also tell you that you should settle — and then they'll chastise you for settling when, inevitably, the relationship doesn't work out. Th…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 12:53 PM
1

I agree with your first paragraph. You, likely, decide on that matter before you have that relationship with a woman. Hm? Why get entangled with a woman who has glaring red flags? If she's fat (and you're not into that) or has kids with other men, why bother? You have to put in genuine effort to land a woman. If you're an average-looking dude, you need to pursue her, especially nowadays when you're competing with countless other dudes in her phone. But if all you see are red flags, you won't be …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 11:04 AM
1

Being in a relationship with an attractive woman (at least enough for you to find her physically and emotionally attractive) who takes care of herself, shares your values, doesn't have major mental issues, makes wise decisions, and shows you love can be worth it. Everything else? I don't know about that. If you can't get that, you're absolutely better off alone IMO. We evolved specifically to prefer mating over not mating... for obvious reasons. Humans also evolved to shove as much hyper-palatab…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 10:37 AM
1

I'm happier as a 34-year-old single man than I was as a 29-year-old engaged man who used to look forward to getting alone time. That said, I'm also wiser than I was then. Some dudes are so codependent that they project their desperation onto others. He could be worse off in a relationship with a woman he's not attracted to, or with a woman who has baggage and kids from other men. She doesn't need to be abusive for it to put him in a worse spot.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 10:33 AM
3

Dating isn't necessary, so this isn't a "beggars can't be choosers" situation. We're not talking about a job or a home. A sane person, man or woman, can opt out of romantic relationships without harm. A bad gf or bf isn't better than no gf or bf. A bad job or house is better than no job or house for someone who's destitute.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 10:22 AM
1

You're wasting your own time. Like I said, the itch doesn't go away.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 10:59 PM
1

Deep down, the motivation for most women is to experience a wedding, have children, and achieve financial security. Other women pairing up just puts more pressure on a single woman. For example, let's say Sarah and Ashley are friends. They earn about the same amount of money and live similar lifestyles. Ashley is more attractive, and she hits it off with a really attractive guy who falls for her and eventually proposes. Now, Ashley has a servant and at least twice as much disposable income as sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 09:03 PM
1

Yeah, what shifts is that they see their friends finding man servants and they don't want to feel left out, like they're lessers. They want their princess party too. My point is that a dude has to be a fool to believe that a woman "scratched an itch" and now she's good to go. No, she's just checking off another box on her list of life goals. In most cases, that itch isn't going away.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 07:33 PM
2

Madonnas basically don't exist. Humans didn't evolve to be together for life; for that to be expected, a culture has to enforce it. If a dude thinks that some woman has "scratched the itch" and is ready to settle down forever, he's a fool. Most of those women just want a wedding and security. And when the honeymoon period is over, most will eventually get bored and start craving their old highs again, because that's what most long-term addicts do. There are exceptions, obviously.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 04:24 PM
2

Many women just want a wedding. Many women just want $ecurity. Many women confuse SMV for RMV for years. Most humans don't just scratch an itch that strong for years and move on forever. It happens, but most people develop habits and addictions, and they accumulate trauma that many of them never overcome. That's why recidivism rates and relapse rates are so high. I don't need to be a woman to understand that. I've seen it all around me for all of my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 02:05 PM
3

That itch for the short-term is never scratched permanently. They want their princess party and wallet with legs. The hot short-term dudes won't give them that, because they can get that with hot women. So, really, they just learn that their RMV is nowhere near their SMV, and they settle for a fool who thinks they have "something special."
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 03:01 AM
1

Obesity is recognized as a chronic disease. If she's obese at 50+, she's not healthy. In all likelihood, it's only a matter of time before her health gets even worse (which apples to younger obese women as well). If he's in good shape and wants a family, why would he marry an obese woman who can't have kids?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/25 12:18 PM
–

Yeah, that's my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/25 12:00 PM
–

Why do feminist journalists and some people on this sub act like the average young woman in America is driven, wealthy, intelligent, and fit compared to the average man? In reality, she earns an average salary, has an average IQ, and is overweight. That's how I know a lot of it is propaganda.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/25 11:44 AM
5

So she is unhealthy, has had poor habits for decades, and can't give the man a family — why marry at that point? The other dude listed "open to having kids."
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/25 12:09 PM
1

Individuals should take accountability for their own foolish decisions. In other words, they should just be able to recognize and admit they were wrong. Typically, that's what people mean. I'm pretty sure you know that too.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 09:18 PM
–

Self-accountability — it's a pretty simple concept. If you make poor decisions (especially repeatedly), take responsibility for them. That said, a lot of terpers also fail to hold themselves accountable, as they act like gold diggers aren't easy to spot. (Why not just avoid women who don't want to work?) Then you have the idiot terpers who believe that men should be able to shirk responsibility for getting women pregnant, leaving the rest of society to deal with it. It's just that bloopers want …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 06:55 PM
2

Sounds like a shit deal for trad men. You just want male workhorses.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 10:49 AM
2

So you want women to work the same jobs as men, but you also want men to provide? How does that make any sense to you? And have you thought about what the average provider male wants from women?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 07:51 PM
1

In the past, we didn't shop all of our blue-collar jobs overseas either, right. It's not about blaming women. We will never live in a utopia. There are trade-offs for everything. If women want men to provide (and if men want to provide), then they can deal with reality and push for changes that would allow that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 04:46 PM
9

Is it "moral" (you brought this up) to feel entitled to someone else's resources? Is it "moral" to ask the most powerful people to force other people to cough up their excess productivity and give it to you (or someone else)?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 04:29 PM
1

Most men aren't settling for a life of poverty. However, most men aren't destined to be wealthy. It's impossible for most people to be loaded and "provide." And to top it off, the average woman is no longer trying to be the type of woman a man would want to provide for anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 04:19 PM
1

We've spent decades raising boys in the West to desire equality, and then, when they got older, they were told that women still want them to be providers. It's ridiculous. You can't change a giant aspect of society so drastically and expect everything else to stay the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 02:14 PM
11

Again, that's MOST attractive. What would be the MOST attractive height for a man? What would be the MOST attractive salary for a man? If men were that picky, the average woman would have trouble finding men who want to date her. But she doesn't, so this is ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 11:17 PM
1

There is a finite number of high-paying white-collar positions. Fewer good positions available to men means fewer men can "provide." Also, prioritizing women over men in education (and then celebrating it when the reverse was condemned) means there will continue to be fewer educated men who can compete for those positions. If we want men to be able to "provide" again (and I don't), we have to prop up men instead of women (with the right propaganda and programs). Otherwise, we'll keep rolling wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 11:01 PM
2

LOL. I didn't blame women for inflation. Inflation is another topic for another subreddit. And I'm not blaming women for anything. I'm pointing out how ridiculous it is for women to flood the labor market and then complain that most men can't provide for them. This is what happens when politicians and propagandists sell a group of people a load of horse shit. Whenever you make any significant change, you should consider everything that is going to be affected by that change down the line.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 07:23 PM
1

Women made their choice. There are trade-offs for everything, and politicians are professional liars, so I blame the idiots who believe them. If you want a man to provide for you, why take away opportunities, resources, and years of training/experience from men just so you can give up your position at 30-something? I don't have a problem with women choosing either path, but they can't expect most men to be providers in this system; it's impossible. Deal with it. Also you suddenly claim to be abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 06:06 PM
3

I don't have a problem with women working. In fact, I prefer equal relationships. But I have a problem with women en masse demanding that men still provide after decades of hooting and hollering. How the hell do women think that's going to work? LOL. Massively increase the labor supply and what happens?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 03:44 PM
9

The average woman has a wealth of options compared to the average dude. It's not all about sex like the other poster was trying to claim.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 03:30 PM
13

Yes, it's unfortunate that not all women are landing sex gods, just like how it's unfortunate that not all men are getting with gorgeous women. But all of this goes beyond sex anyway. Women get a lot more options for relationships as a whole.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 03:12 PM
1

Yeah, most of us don't get what we want. But men seem to give a lot more attention to members of the opposite sex who are not conventionally attractive. Also, if women wanted to be "provided for," maybe they should've thought about that before pushing women to increase the labor supply and driving down wages, making dual-income households necessary for the majority of the population. This isn't fantasy. Actions have consequences.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 03:06 PM
13

Yeah, 100k in a month might not mean shit to the rich guy either. They want something more. Women don't want it as much because they can get it anytime. And for people who don't want it (lol), they sure consume a lot of written content that centers around it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 02:37 PM
1

Yet older women and fat women are inundated with DMs from dudes, and there are fat blobs who make millions on OF. Average dudes who are feminine? LOL. Good luck, bud.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 02:32 PM
3

And it was worth it for me. It turned out to be a huge blessing, because I see a lot of people who are depressed with a lot more than what I have now. For example, I was close friends with a slightly older guy who was always very handsome, tall, and wealthy; he passed away a few years ago after he OD'd on meds. I'll never understand his hell, just like he could never understand what I was going through early in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:52 PM
2

No, I was responding to someone who claimed that feminine heartthrobs were attractive. My point was this: What makes those men attractive is their looks, status, and wealth.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:44 PM
5

The graph you posted doesn't show what you think it shows. It talks about what men find MOST attractive, not "attractive enough to most men." Most men aren't pumping and dumping a damn thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:40 PM
3

Poverty. I was born in a shitty country. My parents did their best to get us out, and we eventually moved to the US. We ended up living near the projects. Also, I always had very little going for me physically. I couldn't use it as a crutch. I was very skinny for most of my early life. I was also short until I experienced a massive growth spurt that caused me to grow over a foot in just two months. In other words, I never really had much, so I find that I appreciate the little things more than m…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:38 PM
6

LOL. They said he's lucky because he doesn't have to deal with their problems. I come from the dirt, and I just don't expect people to relate to my issues or experiences in life. It's very rare to find someone who actually tries to understand, and I go into any interaction knowing that. In most cases, it's not personal at all. People, especially younger ones, just tend to be very self-obsessed.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:25 PM
8

I know it's not personal, but that attitude is not going to garner sympathy to begin with. And it's just as foolish for the dudes to try to get sympathy from the women.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:18 PM
3

Yet women have no issue getting matches online or attention from men—just not always the creme de la creme (or for serious relationships). If you asked women what height and salary they find MOST attractive, 99.99% of men would be eliminated, regardless of age.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:17 PM
1

AFAIK nobody in this comment thread said anything about feeling sorry for him.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:14 PM
11

The guys they're outright comparing to undrinkable water — they want those dudes to be sympathetic to their struggles. "Like, yeah, we're surrounded by you guys, but pretty much all of y'all are unappealing. Please sympathize with my struggles now."
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:09 PM
2

Most women have no issue finding men who are physically attracted to them. They tend to struggle with getting HAWT guys to commit to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:05 PM
2

Can you please explain what that has to do with what I said? I'm missing your point.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:03 PM
8

I'm saying that you really can't expect the average person, male or female, to have sympathy in that case. Of course, it's the right move, but it's not going to happen for most people. Unfortunately, very few people are that emotionally mature.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:01 PM
18

But women want those dudes, whom they compare to undrinkable water, to be sympathetic to their struggles? I get it, but good luck with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 12:33 PM
27

Cliche — but it's like a rich guy born into wealth asking a poor guy to be sympathetic to his struggles. Sure, it would be nice. But given human nature? Good luck. Very few people want to hear that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 12:19 PM
15

The vast majority of dudes don't look like heart throbs and never will. Yeah, it can be cute to some women if it's coming from a very handsome, high-status, wealthy dude. The halo effect will do a lot of the heavy lifting.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 12:05 PM
2

Bloopers are now spouting the same points that Terpers were spouting 10 years ago on this subreddit. Really, the biggest difference is that Bloopers are eager to criticize men in general and refuse to criticize women in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 11:49 AM
5

Single mothers help create themselves by having kids out of wedlock with scumbags like Tate. It's not like Tate hides who he is.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 11:47 AM
3

I never said they should do anything. I'm saying that their desires are unreasonable. They don't need to lower their standards. They can continue being delusional. And, as I said, pretty much everyone has baseline requirements. Most average-looking, average-earning men would choose no woman over the most unattractive women. But if those men want supermodels, then they're delusional. That doesn't mean they should do anything. If they want, they can cross their fingers and hope for the best.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/25 12:41 PM
2

When it comes to relationships, they're delusional because life has shown them that they don't qualify for the man they want. If these women are choosing No Man then they are attaining something they want more than the men below they’re standards You can say that about almost anyone, though. Almost every person has baseline requirements. Just because someone's baseline requirements are higher than those of another person doesn't mean they're not delusional.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/25 12:22 PM
3

Nobody needs to lower their standards. But they're delusional. If someone wants long-term commitment from a very attractive and wealthy person and never gets long-term commitment from a very attractive and wealthy person, then their standards are likely unreasonable. They can still cross their fingers and play the dating lottery for the rest of their lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/25 12:09 PM
2

I mean, the vast majority of women already do it. If some guys are offended, so be it. If short-term relationships with hot dudes make a woman happier, good for her. On both sides, there are people complaining. It's just that women can get laid infinitely easier, so they usually complain about other things. Most women will enter LTRs with men who are not as physically attractive simply because physically attractive men are very, very rare according to women (and according to studies). If the fem…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 05:29 PM
2

I used to do stuff like this. In my case, it was due to holding in my frustration for too long. Basically, I was a pathetic coward, and she was ungrateful (and I resented her for it). I should've just left long before the relationship ended, but because of the sacrifices I made, I didn't want to acknowledge the sunk costs. No matter how many times I told her to take care of basic tasks, she continued to be careless. It would come out in short bursts, and I don't blame her for resenting me for it…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 12:47 PM
5

Some women will treat an ugly dude with basic human decency and expect the guy to worship at their feet. The only reason a lot of these women even entertain these dudes is because they believe that women are entitled to being treated like queens by ugly men who are beneath any men they've had short-term relationships with. Ugly dudes know that ugly women aren't physically attracted to them either. If the dude is going to get the same treatment in the end either way, I can't blame him for aiming …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 12:19 PM
2

Btw, that same “study” that showed the 80/20 - it also showed that the women messaged men across the spectrum whereas men only messaged the hotties. An actual study published in a peer-reviewed journal with a sample size of 8000+ men and 6000+ women didn't have similar findings. If you look at Table 4, you can see that the women also sent more messages to the top guys. And almost 1/5th of men received zero messages, compared to only 1/50th of women. When it came to the least desirable women, les…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/25 01:44 AM
1

"Human doing" is not a typo.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/25 04:23 PM
1

It's not necessary for most men to approach. Some dudes just get around. It would be a waste of time for most men to approach random women anyway, as women view average men as unattractive (until they see compatible dudes thriving in their social circles). I've seen the DMs of my exes. Often, they were from men they'd already met.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/25 03:53 PM
24

Any dude who's ever had at least one average GF for an extended period knows better. Even if they're not fooling around on dating apps or posting thirst traps, average women still get plenty of messages on social media and approaches from men IRL. It's in a woman's best interest to pretend that she's always at a disadvantage, as this allows her to get more out of men who are eager to save the damsel in distress. Most women enjoy having security and being pampered. What's new?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/25 02:13 PM
76

If you have to treat a woman significantly better than the other dudes she dated for significantly worse treatment in response, then the woman is not attracted to you. She wants you to compensate for your lack of physical attractiveness. Women don't have to compare themselves to top models because even average women are consistently pursued by the opposite sex and treated like physically attractive human beings, not physically unattractive human doings.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/25 11:34 AM
11

The problem for a lot of young men is they can only get a consistent supply of sex and validation from the opposite sex within a long-term relationship, and I think it's very rare for any young adult, male or female, to have that level of self-possession. It's a great goal, but it takes time and a lot of effort for many men. And I think once you do reach that point, it's hard to be emotionally invested. The focus shifts towards protecting what you have, including your peace, rather than building…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 11:29 AM
2

Men have much fewer options than women, but most average-looking men have options for long-term relationships. The men who women can get for short-term relationships are often out of their league for stable long-term relationships. The vast majority of men get married and have kids eventually. When it comes to committed relationships, the average man can always pair up with a less attractive woman if he really wants to (and settle). But below a certain threshold, he doesn't want to, as it's not …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 10:28 PM
6

If these young, lonely men are truly as unhinged and lost as bloopers claim, then maybe 20-something, 30-something, and 40+ YO men and women coming here to prod them all day for shits and giggles (and ego trips) isn't very wise. It would be wiser to look in the mirror and put out what you expect to get back. I don't have an issue with playfully teasing someone or calling someone out on their BS. But constantly rage-baiting young, self-hating, vulnerable, lost people—many of whom clearly have lit…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 11:55 AM
15

What does that have to do with what I said? Just because some of the most unattractive women have BFs or husbands doesn't mean that the average dude would want to be in a serious relationship with those women. I wouldn't be with a 400 lb woman, and neither would any of my friends. How do we explain how some of the fattest dudes in the world have wives, while some fit men don't even have GFs? Just because some people have very low standards or put up with abuse doesn't mean that the same applies …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 03:04 AM
–

If most average men are not eager or willing to enter serious relationships with unattractive women (the fattest and ugliest single moms serving as an extreme example of what most men would find repulsive), then whatever OP said applies to men as well. I'm not sure how you couldn't put that together yourself. I agreed with the poster above me. Most men know what it's like to choose between being in a relationship with an unattractive person and staying single. OP is doing nothing more than rage …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 02:00 AM
–

That's a you problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 11:34 PM
–

100%. OP posts pointless rage bait that targets a handful of black pillers. Misandrists upvote it and comment because they come to this sub to poke at the loneliest young dudes. It's not like the vast majority of average dudes would enter LTRs with the ugliest and fattest single moms—especially not once they've actually experienced how exhausting the average real relationship can be.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 09:01 PM
1

Except that data doesn't demonstrate what you're claiming whatsoever. Women are, by and large, in committed relationships—and that doesn't even count the ones who have FWBs or short-term arrangements. Some just date men who are slightly older on average. And if some dudes don't want to date promiscuous women, so be it. Humanity didn't designate people like you to be in charge of modifying people's beliefs to suit your fringe preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:27 AM
1

You're not referring to anything specific, so I doubt you're interested in anything of the sort. Do you see yourself as some kind of hero or something? You're not helping anyone. You're on Reddit whining because some promiscuous dudes don't want to date promiscuous women.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:21 AM
1

Alright, so you're really not interested in having a worthwhile discussion. Just keep reiterating nonsense. Again, I couldn't care less if women I'm not emotionally attracted to don't want to date me. That's not a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:17 AM
1

It's data? What's data? What exactly are you talking about? Until you make that clear, you're spouting nonsense. You didn't answer my previous question either. What is "shaming"? Would it be shaming for me to state that I don't find promiscuous women attractive for LTRs? There aren't a higher percentage of women seeking relationships. According to the 2022 Pew survey (or the 2019 one), for example, there are a higher percentage of single young men seeking to date than single young women, but acc…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:05 AM
1

LOL. A minority of women are not in a committed relationship (especially after 30), and there's a lot less shaming than there was in the past. I don't think we're in any danger of women as a whole giving up on dating. Frankly, I don't really care if any promiscuous women give up anyway. Why should I care? Women have been financially independent for decades, and nobody with a decent job "needs" anybody anymore. It's very easy to fulfill your needs. Also, what do you mean by "shaming"? If I state …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:55 AM
1

Because that dude is not necessarily rejected. I'm in favor of individuals determining what they want from each other. I've never wanted to be with a woman who sleeps around. I can't be emotionally attracted to a woman like that; I've tried. I don't sleep around, but it's not my business to demand that chaste women prefer men like myself. I know a lot of chaste women (if not most) prefer dudes who've been with a lot more women; that's their choice, so why should I give a shit?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:45 AM
2

I have. Why should a man determine what standards a woman should have? In the West, women determine their own standards. If a woman doesn't want a dude like that, she'll just reject him; if she does, both individuals get what they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:27 AM
-4

The man has his standards, and the woman has hers. It's possible (and probably very common) for a chaste woman to prefer experienced men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:24 AM
5

Isn't that up to the individual woman to decide?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:21 AM
17

If anyone acts entitled to something from me, I'm not paying for shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 04:13 PM
1

They don't?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 02:10 AM
1

Yet women never have a shortage of options.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 01:31 AM
1

I never said men aren't attracted to niceness. IMO niceness is pretty much irrelevant to most women unless they're looking for BFFs and pet wallets.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 11:59 PM
1

Why? Men and women are attracted to different things.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 10:00 PM
1

Interesting. I never said men only care about niceness.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 08:45 PM
4

I find most people annoying and boring (and the feeling is likely mutual), but I think the friend zone is a self-created problem. If she's not up to par with your best friends, why not cut ties and move on?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 04:43 PM
2

They like handsome, tall, strong, wealthy, charismatic, fun "good" dudes and "bad boys." Problem is, there aren't enough of the first type to go around for most women, and the "bad boys" are hot, experienced, and exciting (sometimes way more exciting than anything else an average woman can get in a stable LTR). Are there women who only want good men? Sure, there are some. But most dudes would benefit from letting the lovey-dovey shit go.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 04:33 PM
3

So now women (in general, I assume) actually love fit dudes and bullies above all else, and dudes should pay attention to actions over words? This sub is hilarious. Bloopers are turning into Terpers from 2013 (just without the willingness to criticize women's behavior).
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 04:19 PM
1

Yeah, I guess I'm too heterosexual and vanilla to comprehend the appeal of any of that. I do think that fantasies often leak into the real world because they reflect hidden desires on some level. For example, I couldn't be with someone who was constantly fantasizing about torturing me and being extremely violent towards me while I sleep. Of course, that's an extreme example and there's no way for me to know something like that about a woman, but if I did know, I'd never get too close to her. The…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 09:16 PM
1

Yeah, I'm not buying it, because they do such a poor job of explaining why a dude would be sitting there enjoying watching two guys go at it. I think they're bi on some level. Maybe the attraction is weaker, but it's there.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 08:13 PM
1

He said he believes it’s not that uncommon for men who identify as straight to still be attracted to or even hook up with other men. I don't believe those dudes are actually heterosexual (straight); IMO they're bisexual. Being heterosexual means you are attracted exclusively to people of the other sex. Honestly, I wouldn't doubt that 1/5 guys have some bisexual tendencies.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 07:48 PM
0

Not at all. I think they wouldn't be so bummed out if they actually wanted that; more of them would focus on trying to change those women (kinda like how some women try to tame "bad boys").
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 05:49 PM
0

I don't know what a straight dude would get out of watching two guys go at it. I'm straight and wouldn't find that appealing whatsoever, and I don't think I'm special. I wouldn't be surprised if there are that many bi men (though I doubt that stat is based on data from a legit study). It does seem a bit high, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was like 15% or more.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 05:39 PM
-1

LOL. At the very least, they're definitely bi. And in the right situation, they probably would. I doubt straight guys can get off to that. Ain't no way.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 05:15 PM
4

We're talking about serial killers specifically. And I never accused you of inventing any system. I quoted what you wrote in another reply.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 02:38 PM
4

You'd be wasting your time in prison. Once someone has murdered an innocent human being, they've surrendered their privilege to be part of civilized society or in the gene pool IMO. Also, if they really are as charismatic and intelligent as you think (not all of them are), then what would stop them from playing therapists like a fiddle? Who says serial killers aren't kind or of good character? This one blew me away. Yeah, who's to say that the monsters who seek out innocent human beings like ani…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 02:33 PM
6

They also tend to be psychopaths who murder innocent people and rob families of loved ones. A person cannot get any worse than that. I'm sure you'd want to ensure there's plenty of security around to protect you while you work as a therapist for those unsalvageable animals.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 01:47 PM
4

What about this study in a peer-reviewed journal? There were 8,259 men and 6,274 women. Very few men were rated as average or above (Figure 2), and women tended to go for the most desirable men (Table 4). Almost 10 times as many men as women received zero messages.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 10:49 AM
3

Women are the ones who are much more likely to write fanfics. And those stories usually depict a painfully average woman who becomes the object of obsession for a 0.0001% dude. For LTRs, ugly and average women have a longer list of options compared to ugly and average men. And they can hook up with men who aren't ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 10:41 AM
12

Also, there are an infinite number of things to do and learn about on your own. I have professional music production software (with basically any instrument from around the world) that cost me just a few hundred bucks. On YouTube, I have access to free lectures from people who are the best at what they do. This type of stuff was reserved for a select few half a century ago. When I was young, I was obsessed with sports (and I still love playing basketball), but a few years ago, I lost interest in…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 10:39 AM
1

First and foremost, I want someone with similar values who knows that fantasy is bullshit and isn't looking for a savior or a dancing monkey. And there's no way I'm ever going to become a stepfather; no matter how awesome someone is, that life is not for me. Ideally, I'd like to be with the female version of myself. At this point, it ain't happening, of course, but that's what I want. I don't give much of a shit about looks, as long as she's relatively fit (comes down to values and lifestyle) an…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 10:53 PM
1

There aren't enough high earners for every woman. Marriage rates are low AF, and more than half of heterosexual marriages have a male breadwinner, compared to just 16% with a female breadwinner. The primary change is that there are fewer high earners for women to pair with.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 03:40 PM
1

The thing is, I've felt like I was broken before, and I had to take accountability to fix myself. Viewing myself as a zero (an absolute failure) and acknowledging that everything was my fault (even if it wasn't, as some things are obviously out of my control) helped me escape my hell. I believe that once you accept yourself at your lowest, and take a sledgehammer to your ego, you can rebuild from scratch. What made things easier for me was that I've never used drugs or been addicted to alcohol, …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 04:20 PM
1

I mean, I think you're right for the most part, but the people who realize this at any point are rare. And I think they'll become even rarer with as many broken families as there are going to be moving forward. I do think a lot of people are broken, though, especially in the singles pool.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 04:07 PM
1

No, they were. By any measure. So you're just going to declare that sexism was the reason for Kamala's loss (without any conclusive evidence or room left for alternative views)? Is that just so you don't have to critically analyze at the Dem's shitty platform? Oh you mean the COVID year where Trump killed 600,000 Americans and crashed the economy? Did he also kill everyone else around the world and crash their economies too? Very interesting. Also, we have a very obese country, and people with c…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 04:00 PM
1

The fact is three vastly more competent, vastly more qualified candidates have run against Trump, and the only one who beat him was a man. Then maybe they weren't so competent or qualified? Or maybe the Dem's platform has sucked for over a decade and they got lucky during the abysmal Covid year? Nah. Blame on the dudes (even though young women shifted slightly right compared to 2020 as well). Conservatives can never seem to decide whether Biden was too easy or too harsh on the border. I'm not a …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 02:42 PM
1

Read that again, because you don't seem to be comprehending it. There's not much to comprehend. You keep saying people didn't buy into Trump's lies, but people definitely didn't buy into the Dem's lies. There were lies everywhere, because that's what politicians do. Good thing he wasn't on the ballot. He almost was. And then they appointed his replacement (real democracy right there). The very unbiased media's (and the Dem's) attempted to cover it up and push him through is the most disgusting p…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 02:14 PM
1

Right. I think few people reach that point, unfortunately. Even most older women seem to fantasize about saviors. Another person can't fix your internal problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 02:02 PM
1

I don't think you are, since I pretty clearly said I don't think most men are stupid enough to believe Trump's obvious lies. Read that again, because you said it again. You're saying that a politician lies. LOL. SHOCKER, dude. The one where he sounded like a rambling dementia patient? Our last president sounded like a rambling dementia patient 24/7. He was the sharpest he's ever been, though. Harris did nothing but ramble, even during short, edited interviews with friendly networks. When they as…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 01:57 PM
1

You're right. And in most cases, they're probably right about their assumptions (and fears). A good chunk of people have to either settle hard or stay single. Desperation is foolish, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 01:01 PM
3

What I'm saying is that, aside from asexual people and gold diggers, nobody on this planet wants to be with someone they're not somewhat physically attracted to. Why not just be friends at that point?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 12:55 PM
1

Most of the ones who don't probably aren't swimming around in the singles pool for long. So when you enter that pool after a certain point, get ready.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 12:53 PM
2

In most cases, a dude who can get with a hot woman has options other than a woman who's ugly. I'd assume that for a guy who's that attractive, both of the options you presented are unappealing. They'd probably take the average-looking nice woman over both.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 12:46 PM
1

Obviously, I'm talking to you. Politicians are liars, period. Expecting them to be anything else is foolish. And faking laughs is inauthentic, yeah. That's also obvious. I remember Trump did a 3-hour unscripted interview with no breaks or edits. A lot of people like him because he shows everyone exactly who he is.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 12:06 PM
1

Politicians are liars? What a shocker, dude. But that can't be — because people who've sought power and control have typically been the most moral among us. (And they've typically been propped up by saints.) Actually, Kamala's main problem (aside from the Dem's goofy platform and Biden's terrible term as prez) was inauthenticity — from the camo hats to her grating cackle. She couldn't go off script for shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 11:40 AM
3

He chooses women based on looks, and he talks to several women at once, so a lot of it is his fault. IMO the women he dates are way out of his league looks-wise (though they're almost always single moms, and he's childless), but he's very outgoing and likes to party, so he meets women all the time. (I think what helps him quite a bit is that our county is predominantly Hispanic/Latino, and he dates exclusively within his own culture.) Every now and then, one of his relationships will stick for a…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/25 08:33 PM
7

In my opinion, average young men are going to have to eschew distractions and start building strong communities and supporting each other like they did in the past. When it gets to the point where the average young man can't afford to be distracted, I think many of them will shift their mindsets. It'll be a gradual process. This weird, brief period we're living in now — one with constant internet access and sedation — is nothing like anything a human has ever experienced before. Isolating yourse…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/25 04:33 PM
7

If you hate men, just say that. Men have always organized, but men are more tribal; women are smaller and physically weaker (and are less likely to take risks on average), so they basically have to organize as one big group to gain an advantage. In reality, most men aren't asking feminists to do anything. When the men at the top actually have a reason to pretend to give a shit about the men at the bottom and middle class (i.e., their potential competitors), things will change. In the past, they …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/25 04:14 PM
7

Yeah, dude, not surprising; it's not like men helped build civilized society and risked their lives to defend their loved ones from invaders for thousands of years. Organizing is something only women do.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/25 03:59 PM
7

Also, contempt can be mistaken for confidence. If you're around people you don't respect, it's easy to appear ridiculously confident.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/25 03:26 PM
7

I have a friend who always has to go home and talk to his GF on the phone. He doesn't have the balls to just say no to anything a woman tells him to do. (He gets a new GF every few months, and she's always a thirst-trapping bimbo, so it's not like they have anything particularly important to talk about.) He's been doing this for 10 years now, and it has never ended well for him. The more failed relationships he has, the worse his health and motivation seem to get. His binge drinking is definitel…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/25 03:11 PM
5

IME finding a woman who shares my experiences, interests, values, and energy is so rare that when I do find one, I pursue her if she's single (and those women are pretty much never single). I'm not saying that women make bad friends. I'm saying that I'm infinitely more likely to be naturally drawn to men as friends. (And by friends, I mean actual friends, not acquaintances.)
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 10:41 PM
2

Maybe you do connect with your partner on that level but you don't connect with most women on that level. That's been my experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 10:33 PM
1

I have to like the woman that I'm with. I don't have to like the vast majority of women; that's ridiculous for women to demand, as most women don't even like the vast majority of men. When it comes to dating, my main problem is a) I'm an ugly MFer and b) the most interesting women I've ever met were taken by good dudes a long time ago (and I'm happy AF for those dudes because I love to see good men thriving).
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 10:15 PM
1

Do men feel they are somehow more interesting and complex? No. For me, it's just that most women have completely different interests, and women tend to take everything way too personally. Those are the two main impediments. Leering, weird fetishes, "death grip," "sports ball," neckbeards, gamers — I don't know what that has to do with me or what I was talking about. And I can't speak for other men. I love to cook, but that has never been attractive to a woman I know. And I wash dishes by hand, b…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 09:44 PM
1

I'm guessing some do and some don't. I can't read their minds, obviously, but sometimes when I'm talking to people, I can tell that we're never going to legitimately give a damn about each other's interests, and that's fine. Every now and then I meet someone I can talk to for hours even though it feels like only a few minutes have passed. That's very rare, but it's one of the things I look for in friends. Usually, the people I find interesting also find me interesting. I don't need everyone to l…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 07:59 PM
1

Because I don't view her that way. I find most people annoying or boring (though I treat them as well as possible as long as they do the same). Most people probably find me annoying or boring. What does that have to do with an individual that I actually like? Am I required to view most people as interesting? What if we find each other and our friends interesting?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 06:52 PM
2

LOL. Dude, how do you always jump to that? We'd enhance each other's lives by supporting each other in every way, having fun together, and building together. If her right to "satisfaction" and "independence" involves banging other dudes, then I'm out. However, given my life path at the moment, I realize that I'm probably going to remain romantically lonely for the foreseeable future, which is for the best given that the woman I desire is only single in my fantasies.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 03:12 PM
2

I mean, I'd love to build a strong, mutually-beneficial relationship with an awesome woman, but desperation is foolish. I can clean my own house, though. Also, I am romantically lonely, and I don't think desperation is required to participate in this discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 02:29 PM
1

LOL @ sociopathy. Thanks for the diagnosis, Doc. None of my friends have low standards for friendship, so your perspective is alien to me. And if you "need" a partner to be fulfilled, then something is probably wrong. When I was a 20 YO dude, I "needed" a partner, and I was a mess.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 02:21 PM
2

What exactly makes my standards for friends so "discriminating"? (You don't even know my interests, so I'll assume that's what you meant.) I view most men with disdain as well, and I don't have an issue maintaining friendships. I don't care if I don't bond with 99.99% of people on a deeper level.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 02:13 PM
1

Oh, I disagree. I've learned to value my friends even more as I've gotten older. They've always been there for me. I'm not the type of guy who gets much from acquaintances. I'd rather be alone or with my friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 02:03 PM
2

For me, we need to connect on a certain level (beyond merely sharing values and interests), and there has to be a certain level of trust built between us. As we both know, it's not a checklist; it's intuitive. And, of course, each woman will have her own standards for friendship that I'll have to meet on her end.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 02:02 PM
1

I never said I had an issue with acquaintances. But acquaintances aren't friends. I have a handful of genuine friends that I actually consider to be friends. I'm willing to go out of my way to help friends, and they'll do the same for me. I don't have the time or willingness to do that for each acquaintance, and I damn sure don't expect them to do that for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 01:56 PM
6

There are a lot of people I share common values and interests with that I'm not "friends" with. LOL. I do think that access to a person on that level is an exclusive club, yeah. Being anyone's genuine friend (and not just acquaintance) is absolutely a privilege. And if you want to talk about dafuq — being a good friend goes way beyond merely sharing values and interests.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 01:45 PM
3

I never claimed they were. I'm not required to do anything either. But if I expect to become their friend, I have to win them over (and the same applies the other way around) — unless you're saying that you should accept anyone as a friend?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 01:40 PM
6

Because I treat individuals with respect and give them a chance to win me over. And once they win me over, I'm an extremely loyal friend. I don't owe anybody anything until they prove to me that they deserve it. And the same applies the other way around. It makes you a bad partner who only desires a woman for use he can get out of her. No. I understand that every person carries their own biases and traumatic memories. I judge people by how they treat individuals. You can do as you wish. To women…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 01:36 PM
7

I can think that the vast majority of women are boring and have vapid hobbies without thinking that all women do. I can also think that the vast majority of women are spoiled and self-obsessed without thinking that all women are. IME men are just better friends to me. That doesn't make me a "bad" person. I wouldn't think a woman is a "bad" person if she said that women are better friends in general; I'd believe her. To me, it really comes down to how you treat individuals, not how you view the g…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 01:24 PM
2

If you marry a woman who demands that you prop her up and shower her with attention (i.e., the average woman), get ready to hold your L in due time. The vast majority of women are not marriageable IMO. Either you find a self-actualized woman with a strong sense of self (rare AF) or you don't attach yourself to a woman. Why cater to her emotional roller coaster to begin with? What did you expect would happen when you stopped? Hold yourself accountable FFS (because she's not going to hold herself …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 01:13 PM
1

For the same reasons as the women: gluttony and laziness. Also, a lot of people just weren't taught how to take care of themselves properly, and there's a lot of low-quality "food" on the market.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 09:33 PM
–

the bell curve for intelligence for men is much flatter than it is for women - as in, there are a higher percentage of men who are below and above average This isn't an established fact. There's still disagreement about that hypothesis, as contradictory evidence exists. Also, even now, most proponents of that hypothesis are not claiming that the curve is "much flatter."
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 07:29 PM
5

No, but telling yourself that working a job for a company that doesn't give a damn about you (while chasing status and fake validation from fake friends, and accumulating material possessions) is the ultimate win seems foolish to me. We've ended up with a fat, materialistic, nihilistic population filled with broken families (and obsessed with escapism). Mission accomplished, I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 03:21 PM
6

It's not just women. Many people in the business world look down on you for having an Android. I'm not switching to an iPhone, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 12:43 PM
20

If you want to celebrate being self-worshipping, status-obsessed consumerists and corporate drones, go for it. Just know that poor countries can't afford to play pretend.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 11:08 AM
11

To some degree, yes. I wouldn't be perfectly content with the bare minimum, but I'm perfectly content with optimizing what I have now. I've realized that a decent family life isn't in the cards for me, so I've decided to go back to school and pivot to a new career in my 30s rather than commit to the highest paying job I can get in a field that I hate and grind as much as possible (even if I'm good at what I do). There's no point in wearing myself down. It doesn't necessarily involve living in sq…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/25 11:14 PM
11

Because certain things sound good to others and feel good to say/believe. Unfortunately, humans tend to suck quite a bit.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/25 08:05 PM
11

AFBB. It's basic Red Pill, so I doubt very few men here realize it. Those are the same type of dudes a lot of women will cheat on their husbands with too.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 09:51 PM
2

Average women get a bunch of attention and validation, and below average women get some. Another thing is that men rate the majority of women as above average, whereas the opposite is true when it comes to women rating men.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 08:19 PM
1

Let me ask you this: Have I denied that men looking for a mate are most attracted to fertile and healthy women? I don't know what you're posting that graph when this was established from the beginning. If we made a graph like that with earnings, height, and every other attribute that women are obsessed with, we'd quickly realize that the type of man women are most attracted to doesn't exist in the real world. So I'd hardly say that women are reasonable with preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 04:53 PM
0

I think the framing of the male loneliness epidemic is complete bullshit, because it doesn't just apply to men, and the stats reflect that. The self-reported loneliness rates between men and women are exactly the same. Anyway, I've made it clear: Ugly and average men don't get any positive reinforcement from attractive people of the opposite sex. None. There's no reason for ugly dudes to think they have a shot at hot women, unless those men have an intellectual disability or significantly strugg…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 04:14 PM
1

Most dudes will be seen as ugly regardless, even if they look more youthful at 20. Women value wealth, charisma, power, competence, and confidence in average-looking men (i.e., pretty much all men). The men they see as physically attractive make up a tiny percent of the male population (see Figure 2 here), and the vast majority aren't capable of landing those men for stable LTRs. Furthermore, even if the average age gap isn’t large it doesn’t change what men wish they were doing. And women wish …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 03:58 PM
2

It goes both ways. But I already made it clear that both sexes were shallow. My point is it’s the exact same for women who aren’t hot or fit into conventional feminine roles Only difference is that those women will still have plenty of serious options from 18-50. Women are not short on options; they just don't want their equals, and I don't blame them past a certain level of unattractiveness.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 03:48 PM
1

First off, being a young man does not make you above average at all, as the vast majority of men are seen as physically unattractive whether they're in their 20s or their 60s. Being a broke young guy who's still trying to figure out the world (and his purpose) is neither masculine nor attractive; unless you look like a model, you're not attracting many women in that situation. What matters most for average-looking men are masculine traits that are typically developed through experience and hard …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 03:28 PM
2

The percentage of 26 or younger women who are single and not obese is a lot higher—and that's what's relevant to 26 or younger men, who also make up a small percentage of the male population. In the US, the average age gap is 2-3 years (and the largest age gaps occur when men get older, typically during 2nd marriages). Bringing up elderly ladies in a discussion about young men and their preferences is asinine.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 03:16 PM
1

Because young men who are looking to mate don't want to commit resources to infertile women who are decades older than them? Yeah, sure. Those women don't want average young men either. And every woman in her 20s and 30s is a Stacy? Do you believe that?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 03:02 PM
2

My point is that most women don't view men as human beings either. (Obviously, most dudes are shallow, but they're mostly looking for other traits, as you said; they're definitely not looking for height.) And "dream girl"? I accepted that I would never get my "dream girl" back when I was in my teens. Average and below dudes don't get any positive reinforcement from hot women, so they adapt early. They don't have the option to turn on a phone and receive validation, attention, and intimacy from v…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 01:08 PM
7

The average dude isn't asking for a woman's height or prodding for her income before deciding whether he should actually get to know her as a "human being." The vast majority of women don't give a flying duck about men as "human beings" either. Who cares? Because the women that don't behave like that are still seen as the same because all they can get is sex. What?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 12:05 PM
1

No, because an elderly woman is out of the mating game. I wouldn't bother dating if I were an elderly man. What's the point?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 11:22 AM
4

Generally, men don't tell women that they struggle to get interest from the opposite sex because they're not good people. (That's partly because all women get interest from the opposite sex, but w/e.)
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 07:34 PM
1

Dude, most women aren't fat because they're pregnant. They're fat all the time — before and after pregnancy.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 01:31 PM
9

Also, no, good looking people don’t act worse than non-conventionally good looking people. That has to do with life experiences and bitterness and defensiveness actually have a lot more to do with that. They just told you that it doesn't have to do with good-looking people acting worse, but with good-looking people who are also "good" being less likely to be in the singles pool. And they're right. On average, the ugly-looking "bad" men are going to be ignored (and definitely left-swiped just bas…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 10:07 AM
3

High standards when it comes to what exactly? Do you only want dudes over 6'3", immediately eliminating 97% of the dudes (probably more in the singles pool) available to you? I mean, yeah those are high standards — dumb AF on their own (especially if prioritized above all else) but high. Priorities are the issue. If you choose to prioritize things like looks and money at the expense of character, why would you be surprised by the outcome in the long term? If you skimped on character because you …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 07:09 PM
3

More common for sure. In 1880, the average age gap was 5 years. Since 1970, the average age gap in the US has dropped from 3.0 to 2.2, but it hasn't really moved much since 2000. My mother is a year older than my father, and they got married almost 40 years ago; the same goes for my dad's best friend. But I also know several couples with 10+ year gaps (including two women I was friends with in HS whose husbands are 25-30 years older, making those men about as old as my father). Age gaps (and div…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 12:06 PM
1

It has to do with what you said. You're the one who said that at least women have a reason to be fat, as if the fact that they can get pregnant is a valid reason to be obese (despite the fact that obesity was much rarer until recently). Most people, male or female, don't have a reason to be that fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 07:07 PM
1

Meant to reply to your other comment, but the vast majority of obese women have no excuse to be obese — especially considering that they're putting their children at a much higher risk of growing up without a mother.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 02:36 PM
–

The feigning of victimhood is often the main source of power for evil women — and a "In Case Of Emergency, Break Glass" box for many of the rest. Also, I don't know why so many men are obsessed with getting them to admit anything. The truth is right in front of you. Process it in a healthy manner, and move forward with your own life.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 02:33 PM
1

Obese women also have a significantly higher risk of maternal death compared to healthy women.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 10:42 AM
1

The men I connect with are just more emotionally stable and share more common experiences and interests, even if we disagree on a whole host of things. Friendships with women can be a great thing, and obviously there's nothing wrong with them; however, for me, friendships with women just tend to be way more superficial and distant — which is fine, because I only have enough time for a handful of genuine friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 11:51 AM
1

Living on an average salary isn't really "living" in the mind of the average person. If the average woman sees her friends getting married and having more money to spend, odds are high that she's going to want that (and the status boost) too.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 08:41 PM
1

don’t need the money these days For the average person, this is bogus. IME few people are satisfied with the lifestyle of the average single person, especially when they're bombarded with snapshots of the good life on social media. The cost of living is at the point where you need two salaries to afford the lifestyle level that families could afford back in the day on one blue-collar salary. With long-term BFs and husbands, women get some extra disposable income and a man servant. And he can be …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 01:06 PM
6

And don't marry a single mom, because the chances of divorce for blended families is like 60-70% (almost as bad as it is for third marriages).
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 09:41 AM
–

What you're saying doesn't make any sense to me. Some men were rated significantly higher, and those men received significantly more messages from women. Even the women in the lowest quintiles of attractiveness went after much more attractive men; the least desirable women sent only 10% of their messages to men at their level of desirability, and that's saying something considering that a much larger chunk of men than women were at that level of desirability.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 12:06 PM
–

The ratings in that study came from other people.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 12:02 PM
–

Online dating studies have found that women rate most men as below average. That's at first glance and based on photos for the most part. I'd say in real life, an average-looking guy has a better shot of charming a woman. Just look at how few men are actually attractive to women on a physical level.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 11:40 AM
10

I'd commit because, when it comes to romance, all I've ever really wanted to do was build a strong, stable, wealthy, healthy family. That would lead to the most fulfillment for me. However, I think the majority of my friends wouldn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 12:13 AM
3

For the most part, excitement and novelty at the expense of character and the willingness to provide/commit. IMO what I listed are the things that matter most for developing the healthiest and most stable long-term relationships, which then tend to produce children who grow up to be mentally and physically healthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/25 01:58 PM
6

The issue is that the vast majority of women do eventually lower their standards quite a bit, so you end up with the same situation described in your first sentence, just a few years to a decade later. Most can't seem to go without having at least something similar to what their highest status friends have, which is eventually a stable marriage and a family with an attractive and high-status man (and a nicer house, a nicer car, trips, etc.). However, most don't qualify for a high-quality man, so…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/25 12:55 PM
3

Pew Research Center surveys — either one of the most recent ones, 2022 or 2019. After 30, like 3/4 dudes are in committed relationships. Even among single dudes, plenty just aren't looking to date at the time they were surveyed. I'm not saying those relationships are great; I'm saying most women don't think that staying single is better than dating an average man. A minority of women think that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 06:59 PM
1

LOL. I don't think anyone aside from a few nutcases care.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 06:35 PM
3

Most women do find replacements, and stating the obvious is pointless, because nobody needs to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 06:27 PM
4

You said "we." You don't speak for all women.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 05:58 PM
5

That's a very powerful (and very feminist) thing to say online, but the vast majority of women are in committed relationships with average dudes. All that digital hooting and hollering amounts to little more than fleeting man hate.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 05:54 PM
3

Some people are just ugly, so they either settle (accepting that the other person won't find them to be hot) or stay single. In my 20s, I never found any of the women who were into me physically attractive whatsoever. I just accepted that I wasn't particularly physically attractive (given that I was already in shape) and prioritized other aspects of them, thinking that lust had little to do with love. However, I think your sentiment is correct, and I know better now, which is why I'd rather stay…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 10:17 AM
8

I mean, the only way either one is a threat is if they're aggressive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 10:22 PM
3

I want to live alone but do so in a community with people who have intact families. I'm a bit selfish. And though I'm a libertarian, I'd be fine with rewarding healthy, intact families through tax credits and cuts, as those people (as rare as they are) a big reason why our society functions so well IMO. I don't want to be in a culture where a significant chunk of the future generation are being raised by single moms (with absent fathers) who have "relationships" with one dumbass to the next. I d…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 09:20 PM
6

I would still take the man because it's undoubtedly a wrap if the bear is aggressive. With an aggressive man, there's at least a chance to buy time, de-escalate, or even get a lucky hit in the right place. I completely understand why women might choose the bear; I just think it's a foolish choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 08:56 PM
12

Man. The vast majority of men aren't violent, and I'd have an infinitely better chance of being able to defend myself from an aggressive man (especially if I have a gun with me).
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 08:45 PM
1

Right, I'm not saying your perspective isn't valuable, but I think people should be willing to look at the average person and take that into consideration. You brought up that women can achieve on their own, but most women are not even close to being high achievers; most people — men and women — don't even possess the drive, discipline, and/or intelligence required to excel IMO. And people tend to compare themselves upwards, especially nowadays with social media. Being an average person who can …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 02:15 PM
0

But that's just you. Like the average man, the average woman doesn't achieve much in life, so she's drawn to a man's money and status. Even if she lands a dude who barely earns more than she does, her spending power increases. And like the average man, the average woman isn't crushing it; she is overweight and undisciplined, earns an average salary, and has an unremarkable IQ. The few women who are high achievers are drawn to men who've achieved even more. Also, men are very much objectified for…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 02:05 PM
1

Nobody is crying, and that is how accountability works. If someone can't be accountable, they shouldn't be in charge.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/25 03:18 PM
1

If you know they're a criminal and you prop them up, you're an accomplice, period. I was talking about the bigger picture. If you select for "bad" dudes, you're going to get more "bad" dudes over time. You're not only helping perpetuate their genes, but you're also incentivizing that type of behavior. So whining about that behavior is asinine if you're helping to perpetuate it. It's like dudes who whine about 304s while paying for OF subscriptions. When an average 304 can earn as much or more as…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/25 02:41 PM
1

If you prop up a criminal, you're an accomplice.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/25 02:12 PM
1

I agree with your second paragraph. However, if we can agree that it's extremely popular, then maybe feminists can stop blaming everything on the moral failings of men. If you're selecting for poor behavior, you're perpetuating poor behavior. Terrible priorities beget terrible outcomes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/25 02:02 PM
2

I didn't say that's where he's met all of his GFs. But a lot of single moms do go to bars, especially if they have older kids. What I'm saying is that he's a party animal (and a bit of an alcoholic IMO). He works at a higher-end restaurant and a restaurant/bar — one as a server and another as a bartender.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 09:43 PM
6

It's a good way for them to marry up. Yep, I have a friend like this. Over the last 10+ years, he's dated more beautiful, curvy (actually curvy) women than any man I know despite being an inch shorter than average, balding, and significantly overweight (with serious health issues in his early 30s). However, every woman he's been with has been a single mom (including a couple who were like 5+ years older than him). His ex-wife was a single mom. He flunked out of community college. He has a shitty…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 07:53 PM
1

I don't compliment strangers whatsoever, and I'm very careful with compliments toward women at work. I definitely don't compliment anyone's appearance unless it's a close friend in a casual setting. F that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 07:27 PM
6

Most of all, I don't want to deal with another man and his family, and I'm not incentivized to raise another man's child. I just don't feel a desire to burden myself. Plenty of dudes are fine with getting with single moms. If a single mom's dating pool shrinks a bit, so what? Broke dudes with a bad credit score have a smaller dating pool. Ugly dudes have a smaller dating pool. Short, fat dudes have a smaller dating pool. Some of those guys are great human beings, but they're not particularly att…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 07:12 PM
4

I want someone who's going to make my life better, not worse. I don't want to be chosen as someone's savior again. The fewer burdens, the better. Right now, I want serious commitment with someone who's similar to myself. However, if I'm still single in my 40s, and starting a family is no longer possible, I'll opt for serial monogamy with long bouts of singlehood.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 03:55 PM
1

until I start to find a buyer for my car that actually wants to keep it for the long haul. Unlike with cars, there aren't enough satisfactory options for everyone with something to offer. Human connections are a lot more complex. On an individual level, we don't need each other anymore, so there's little reason for anyone to settle hard. Of course, most people settle anyway, often due to FOMO. and at that point will need to double down to dodge regret Any regret they feel will be based on fantas…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 12:06 PM
0

I disagree with both of you. That first comment didn't come from me.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 09:29 PM
2

I disagree with you. Respect is not owed.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 06:25 PM
2

Not quite sure what you're asking, as that question can go a couple of ways. I choose to treat random strangers with respect unless one gives me a reason to do otherwise. But random strangers don't owe me respect; they can choose to show me respect. If they choose to disrespect me, it's my job to enforce my boundaries. I don't think I'm owed anything — be it respect, kindness, money, opportunities, or whatever. Of course, I refuse to associate with people who treat me poorly, but I never take re…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 04:59 PM
1

My only point is that nobody is actually owed respect. I choose to show respect to people who show me respect because I want to. I enjoy being kind and respectful towards good people. I'm grateful for acts of kindness when (and if) they come. Nobody owes me kindness. Nobody owes me respect. Nobody owes me anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 03:54 PM
–

I strive to be as good of a human being as possible, living in accordance with my values. That doesn't mean the respect will be reciprocated (as demonstrated throughout my life) — and it doesn't mean that anybody owes me anything. As a grown man, it's my job to defend myself, provide for myself, and enforce my boundaries.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 03:00 PM
–

Respect? In what world? I've never been owed respect. It's my job to enforce my boundaries. Random people don't owe me a damn thing. I'm not sure where all of this entitlement comes from. Men whining about being owed anything, especially sex (which anybody can live without), are pathetic IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 02:43 PM
-2

What do you mean? Who's not dating? Only a third of women 18-29 are not already in a committed relationship — and only like one-sixth of women in in the 30-49 age bracket are single. And that's just committed relationships. Young women are, without a doubt, dating. They can't seem to get enough of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 02:22 PM
3

It's fake, though. They just project some imaginary version of you onto the real you. IME as long as a man somewhat fits the mold on a superficial level, the woman fills in the rest with her imagination (and ignores some of the man's flaws). Eventually, the real person shines through — because it's impossible for anyone to live up to an imaginary version of themselves over the long run — and the woman might not like what she sees.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 10:23 AM
2

emotionally available , considerate , kind , one that listens to their feeling , pays attention to details None of this is actually "attractive" to a lot of women. Neither is washing the dishes and vacuuming, or whatever feminists come up with. These things just make some women feel comfortable (and in some cases, comfortable enough to take everything for granted). It they run into a handsome, tall, and/or high-status dude who's charismatic (with an edge) and makes them feel something "special,"…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 10:00 AM
–

I agree, but you also don't have to dehydrated to be cut. In that pic, Eli has an average build for an upper-class male in his 20s or early 30s IMO. He's a tad fat but fine. Dude in the OP is at like 10% BF. Dudes like DK Metcalf play high-level football at a much lower body fat percentage. I perform much better when I'm at a lower BF% (down to a certain point, though not willing to go lower).
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/25 03:30 PM
–

He's really good at throwing a football (compared to the average person). That doesn't mean he's not fat in that pic (though it's probably not him in peak condition, as it looks like that pic was taken either during the offseason or after retirement). Did it warrant the mockery? No, and the average person shouldn't be throwing stones.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/25 03:09 PM
-1

I had a woman tell me she's not into a certain type of dude only to eventually cheat with said type. Her sister did something similar before that, though she didn't cheat. She'd rant about how she's not into a certain type of dude; then she got in with said type like half a year later. IME women's emotions are so fleeting that I've learned to just appreciate their words in the moment. Beyond that, there's often very little to take away from whatever they tell me.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/25 02:05 AM
3

That's not a doom mindset. It's an observation. (I don't even believe that most women aren't actually into ripped and muscular dudes.) I'm just saying, if that's really the case, then guys are incentivized to become more unhealthy because we've become so deeply detached from healthy habits and standards. Most people settle, yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 11:01 PM
3

That's a good point. But it's kinda hard to accomplish for healthy men now that the average 5'3.5" American woman weighs about as much as the highest end of "Normal" BMI for a 5'10" male (i.e., a healthy American man of average height). So dudes who want a mate are now incentivized to become less healthy just to look bigger than women and increase their chances.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 10:28 PM
3

I'm about the same build as the dude in the OP, and I'd say it's closer to 3 in normal lighting (and with the arms down). The best thing about #3 is that finding clothes that fit perfectly is easy. I think the lighting is throwing a lot of the women off. That's the type of lighting they have in certain dressing rooms IME. When I take my shirt off in those places, I look ridiculously shredded, to the point where I blow myself away. When I take my shirt off at home, my torso looks good, but it's a…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 09:17 PM
1

Grifters gotta sell you a problem only they can solve. IMO the black pill is what sells men the message that they have to be perfect specimens. I think getting into a LTR is fairly easy as long as you have a decent job and low standards. Getting into a relationship you actually want to be in (and staying in it) is the hard part. And for that, some of TRP's advice may help, though "spinning plates" and "negging" aren't things I would do.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 09:16 PM
2

I've been 8, 9, 7, 11-ish, and now 3. I was bulky when I did bodybuilding in my early 20s, but dudes with my frame require so much food and heavy lifting to maintain that level of muscle. It was so unhealthy and pointless. I basically had to spike my insulin throughout the day and force myself to eat, so I just gave that shit up after like 5 years, knowing that it was going to hurt my longevity. I feel way better at #3, and I'd rather live into my 90s like my grandpas. And my current lifestyle d…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 08:24 PM
1

It's complex, but some things are clearly more attractive. Like, sure, you can find dudes if you're an obese, aggressive woman, but working to change certain aspects of yourself is going to open you up to a whole other world of options, increasing your chances of finding someone you're actually interested in. Same goes for dudes; except it's probably even more important for dudes, because the average dude has fewer options to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 08:15 PM
1

I'd say almost all women take personality into account, but some masculine personalities are more attractive than others. The the only reason I've ever had women interested in me was personality (aside from when I was in higher status positions compared to certain women). It sure as shit wasn't due to my ugly mug.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 08:10 PM
8

TBF the most popular one in that image was a dude with a lot of water retention and bulkier biceps (most likely due to certain enhancements). Under normal lighting and with a normal pose (and no lens distortion compared to the pic on the left), the dude on the right in your original post would probably fall under #3, which was a very popular choice according to that image.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 08:06 PM
1

He's also flexing a bit on the right and is under slightly stronger lighting, which makes the grooves pop even more (and his head shine like the sun). His head looks a bit squished in the second pic — probably lens distortion. In reality, the version on the right is likely stronger and has better endurance after 3 months of training.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 07:59 PM
3

I have that type of build (with maybe 10-12% BF) and my BMI is above 28.5. If we've reached the point where a dude with 10% BF and an overweight BMI is considered "skinny," I think we can disregard body standards. And given that the picture on the right is after 3 months of hardcore workouts, I guarantee you that he has more muscle on the right.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 07:10 PM
5

I've seen women claim Jason Momoa had a dad bod in one of those beach pics. And Eli Manning was never known as an elite athlete. He was a good (but very lucky) QB who was far from athletic. Hell, I ran a faster 40 yard dash as a scrawny HS kid than Eli ran at the NFL combine, but I was never close to being an "elite" athlete, or even a good one. You don't need to be in amazing shape to be a good NFL quarterback. You need to be able to make good decisions on the fly and have solid arm talent.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 07:07 PM
4

A lot of those dudes are far from natural. I think one problem is that women and dudes who've never done bodybuilding think those are natural physiques.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 06:45 PM
8

Uh, yeah, sure. I have something close to that physique and an "overweight" BMI. That's not skinny. It's a naturally jacked physique. Even OP is saying the dude on the left looks strong. However, that version has less muscle than the version on the right, so I don't know what you're talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 06:43 PM
2

IIRC one study found that women rate jacked physiques higher for one-night stands and less jacked physiques higher for LTRs.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 06:18 PM
1

Yes, he has some definition. Those are the few grooves. I'm talking about six pack abs. Unless someone is flat-out fat, they're going to have some ab definition. The guy on the right is jacked underneath the fat (and he has a naturally strong frame that many guys don't have).
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 06:16 PM
5

Because most people are legitimately fat. They're not 3 months (or less) away from being shredded like he is in the first pic. Again, he's in lighting that makes abs pop, yet you can barely see any grooves.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 06:02 PM
5

He looks strong, but he doesn't have abs. He's in the best lighting possible for abs, and there are barely any visible grooves. Put him in the average room and you won't see anything. The lighting applies to the version on the right as well. His abs are super visible because he's in the best possible type of lighting. There's nothing freakish about his physique; he looks really healthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 05:42 PM
12

Most dudes are fat (or skinny fat), so jacked dudes are rare, and most women wouldn't be able to land a jacked dude for a stable LTR (or offer him a compatible lifestyle).
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 05:36 PM
21

Sure, and many probably do. However, I've heard women say height, money, and other things don't matter. I've heard women who choose one POS after another say all they want is a kind gentleman. I've heard a lot of people say a lot of things.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 05:31 PM
4

And it's a relatively handsome dude. Take the average dude (most guys) with the average frame. In most cases, he will look better ripped (to a reasonable extent) than not ripped, even if he's wearing clothes. His jawline will pop more, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 05:30 PM
17

Again, we've seen women go crazy for our abs and toned muscles. Most of us have never seen women go nuts for our love handles. Also, look on the cover of erotica novels for women. Most of those dudes have visible abs (and roided physiques). Women can say whatever they want, but dudes see what actually gets results and attracts the most attention. Handsome and high-status dudes will get attention no matter what, of course. IMO the dude in the photo is handsome, and the version on the left looks s…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 05:07 PM
34

Because I've seen women in general go crazy for abs and toned muscles. I don't deny that many prefer the body on the right, but generally, surveys tend to find that body fat isn't attractive in men. Also, the dude on the left is already very fit. You're not going to look like the guy on the right after just 3 months of working out and eating well unless you have a solid base. He just lost some body fat. That said, I don't think dudes should base their health goals on what women want. A lot of du…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 04:58 PM
4

You said I was "worried" about something when we're just having a discussion. That was just an odd retort. Anyway, the person you responded to was talking about unattractive women, and the OP was talking about people who express disgust and take offense. I thought that's what we were talking about. IMO it's important for everyone to be grounded and respectful (as long as the other person is respectful). People can do whatever they want; they can delude themselves for all I care. I'm just saying …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 04:13 PM
5

I'm talking about the OP and the other person's comment that you responded to (the one about "owning it"). I don't know what you're talking about or wishing to accuse me of. If someone has severe facial asymmetry and several facial features that are not conventionally attractive, they're most likely ugly. I know this well. They need to get over it and stop taking it out on others who haven't done anything to them. Why only focus on the ugly ones? It’s shitty when attractive women flip out as wel…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 11:57 AM
8

If someone is flipping out on another ugly person for respectfully showing interest, they likely have significant unresolved issues related to their ego. I'm not worried about anything. I'm responding to a comment on this subreddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 11:52 AM
7

I mean, maybe you'll never get anyone who sticks around; that's a real possibility if you're genuinely ugly. Oh well. Focus on what you can control: stay fit and well-groomed, dress well, be kind (not a people pleaser), and get money. If you express disgust or take offense when another ugly person hits on you, then you clearly have an ego issue (and probably other internal issues) that needs to be resolved. I'm ugly AF due to things that are out of my control. I'm not surprised when certain peop…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 11:46 AM
9

Nobody is required to do anything. But it's best for them to get over it. There's nothing wrong with owning it. If you're ugly, you're ugly. Learn how to build real confidence around things that are actually under your control, and stop deluding yourself and seeking validation from others.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 11:31 AM
2

I have. It's annoying. But the few loud ones complaining about that have a few screws loose (and a lot of them are not the brightest). I've also made it clear that if a person prioritizes physical attraction, dominance, and money so far above everything else (and at the expense of other things that contribute to successful long-term relationships), I really don't want to hear their whining and finger-pointing when it turns out that their partner lacks character or loyalty. But I'm going to hear …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 11:17 AM
8

Young men are too focused on being good-looking enough/strong enough/lift enough that swarms of women will throw themselves at him for his choosing. And you’ve got young women wanting to make connections but nobody wants to use that much energy on one person without results first. Typical "men bad, women good." A lot of women are chasing attention and validation (particularly from high-status men); they just get a lot more of it. But we're gonna pretend that women are just looking for wholesome …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 04:04 PM
2

IMO truly loving someone else in a healthy way requires having so much love for yourself that you can share some with another person without being completely destroyed if the relationship ends for whatever reason, be it betrayal or loss. People who are obsessed with their trauma tend to seek love from others (in an attempt to "fix" themselves). They don't have any real love to share. I don't think people who haven't dealt with their trauma should be looking to date. They should be focusing on ac…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 01:10 AM
1

I don't really have a problem with distrust. I don't even consider that baggage TBH. Trust should be hard-earned. My issue is when they've spent 10+ years hopping from one toxic dude to the next and, as a result, developed habits that prevent them from staying loyal to (or genuinely appreciating) a man who isn't like that. The next decent dude who signs up for that type of reclamation project is likely getting his life f'd up in the long run.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 12:19 AM
–

I wouldn't be offended, though. I don't change my grooming habits, so if my facial hair (or whatever) wasn't a problem when we got together, then why is it a problem now? I just know that I carry myself about as well as I can given my limitations. I'm fit and well-groomed, and I wear clean, well-fitting, elegant clothes. If I were a fat slob who dressed like shit and didn't wash himself, shave, or keep his hair tidy, a wake-up call certainly wouldn't hurt. I've always thought that most women loo…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 01:56 PM
–

I don't care. I keep myself well-groomed. If they don't like how I look at my best, then they can move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 01:02 PM
6

It's not, but older people tend to look sloppy. The vast majority of people just don't take care of themselves. Two decades (or more) of poor habits do a lot of damage to a person, and many people accumulate stress and unhealthy crutches as the responsibilities of adulthood pile up.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 11:12 AM
12

Everybody settles to a certain degree. The lucky few are those mature enough to accept reality and support each other despite each person's immutable shortcomings. However there is no indicators saying that she's not attracted to that. The same applies to men: Just because the husband finds other women attractive doesn't mean he's not physically attracted to his wife. Also, let's not act like the average woman wouldn't prefer being with a 6'5", handsome, and jacked version of their BF or husband…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 01:56 PM
2

When they are challenging their mate value, sane wholesome people are pairing up. You're right—and this seems to be more common nowadays, especially with what's littering people's feeds on social media. In some ways, I guess I'm challenging my mate value right now. However, I'd rather be single for the rest of my life than attach myself to a single mom who's not compatible with my lifestyle. (Not to mention, blended families have an abysmal divorce rate.) I have only myself to blame for wasting …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 09:36 PM
2

I don't think OP realizes there were enough women who didn't have such standards, and the majority of the men she is describing are already taken by those women. That's a great point. This absolutely gets worse over time, as you seem to have realized already. Bingo. IMO this is why it's so dumb for older dudes to tell young men that they'll have more success later. If a man's idea of "success" is more low-quality options, sure. But if he wants to maximize his chances of landing a high character …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 03:06 AM
2

I'm 33, so I'm a millennial, and I'm above everything she listed there when it comes to physical attributes. I don't see myself as far above average at all—aside from maybe being significantly fitter than the vast majority of men my age. One of my best friends is a year younger than me. He and I are very similar—though I'm a few inches taller and in better shape (he's still relatively fit), and he earns a lot of money and has more conventionally attractive facial features (including blue eyes). …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 11:13 PM
25

I just avoid approaching (as a result, also avoiding marriage for now) and minimize interactions with women who aren't family or genuine friends. I'm not interested in dating in the foreseeable future, and I don't want to deal with any drama or get into some kind of "friendship" where I'm expected to do XYZ or text all the time. I'm pretty happy with the people I have around me right now—and I'm pivoting toward a new career, so I'm focused on that more than anything else (and don't need any dist…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 10:54 PM
2

Most of her physical requirements are average at best; that makes things easier for her. She's willing to date up to a decade older; that makes things easier for her too. A lot of dudes don't start making good money until their 40s, so plenty of dudes who struggled to find a decent options in their 30s solely due to lacking in the income department can really hit their stride in their late 30s or early 40s. Sure, it's not necessarily going to be easy, but it's never really easy for dudes to find…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 10:03 PM
3

I disagree. Average-looking dudes in their early 40s don't have a lot of fit, childless women to choose from. IMO the average single woman in her 30s is not marriage or LTR material: overweight, likely has kids from a previous relationship, and is likely in debt. Given her description, she's above average for a single woman of that age group, so she stands out plenty.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 09:08 PM
1

I'm not denying that men need it or claiming that platonic relationships offer "zero benefit." I think friendships and a loving community are very important. Just two things: Given the stats we have on self-reported loneliness, it seems that men might not require as many platonic relationships as women on average. I don't think having many "caring friendships" significantly impact how much a man craves intimate relationships with women, particularly during the most virile years of his life.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 01:57 AM
1

Even when it comes to what you're talking about, I think what you're failing to consider is that maybe men neither crave nor need quite as much support or as many "caring friendships" as women do on average. Given that both sexes report similar levels of loneliness (despite the woman "nurturing community and love around her," as you put it), I'm going to lean toward trusting my hunch on that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 01:45 AM
-1

What does that have to do with what the other guy said? Imagine a world in which every average dude could receive hundreds of messages on his phone from eager women who find him physically attractive; sometimes, these women even approach him in public. Some of these women are down to initiate casual relationships, and others are down to take him out on dates and explore the potential of something more serious. Now, imagine another world in which every average dude receives endless hugs and const…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 12:37 AM
-1

Ok, so do you believe that a lack of "caring friendships" is a bigger reason why many average young men are more desperate? You don't think that significantly fewer options (for both casual or long-term relationships) and significantly less validation (if any) from the opposite sex have more to do with it? IMO if average dudes knew they had a never-ending line of FWB options and long line of relationship options to choose from (while playing the passive role of the pursued rather than the active…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 12:06 AM
1

Young women are rarely single, though, so I don't think friends has anything to do with this. What average women have over average men is an abundance of dating options. They also have a never-ending supply of validation from the opposite sex, which makes them less desperate. For men, it's often feast or famine. Either you're that guy or you're just another guy (who lands occasional LTRs that cost you a lot of effort and money to compensate for the fact that you're not that guy).
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 05:56 PM
2

There are lots of men who have standards and requirements for women they date, they just tend to be in relationships more often than desperate men do. If you mean that men with standards tend to have longer relationships, I can see that. However, my male friends who fit that mold also tend to go through much longer periods of being single. Meanwhile, my male friends who are desperate to get laid are single for very brief periods; they're constantly in relationships that last anywhere from a few …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 12:19 PM
3

The average dude here is a young man. Why should he want an older woman? Less than one in five women in the 30-49 age bracket are single. Therefore, the average woman (5'4", 174 lb, and 37 YO) is in a committed relationship. The majority of 18-29 YO women are in committed relationships. The majority of 18-29 YO men are not in committed relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/25 10:16 AM
–

Some just want a woman with similar values. And then you could say that high n count people are more likely to cheat and even that makes no sense because people are generally single while having different sex partners. Ok, but people who sleep around are building a habit (and feeding an addiction) that revolves around novelty. In many cases, it's going to make it more challenging to stay loyal to one person. Either way, I don't think a logical explanation is necessary here. If someone finds some…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/25 01:19 AM
9

LOL — what? On average, women are way pickier about pretty much everything. Also, the vast majority of young women wouldn't want anything to do with the man I described above, and rightfully so. If they really want a relationship, they can get one with a young guy who's neither bald nor fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 09:46 PM
9

So? I'm sure women in the same age bracket as the average dude here would respond very well to a 5'9" 37 YO chubby dude who earns an average salary and has significant hair loss.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 08:19 PM
2

Actually, my partner has all those qualities, and I'm happy to be with her. Awesome. That's what I'm talking about. So did my previous ex. If I wasn't with her I'd rather be single, that's why I keep on encouraging men to find their equals, but then again, maybe some will be happier settling, though I cannot understand that concept. I told myself the same thing before we broke up. It's values over everything for me. If you don't take care of your body, our values don't align. If you sleep around…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 03:50 PM
1

Yeah, why would most fit, healthy, hard-working men be eager to attach themselves to unfit and infertile women? It makes sense for young women to have much higher physical standards (due to seemingly endless options), and it's true that men and women look for different things; however, it also makes sense for healthy men to prefer being single over pairing up with someone who can't even respect their own body or someone with only problems to offer. I'd be with the female version of myself, but t…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 02:28 PM
2

Of course it doesn't make sense. If a woman wants a stable relationship with a respectful guy, she can get it. Reasonably fit young women who put themselves out there have an unfathomable amount of options — especially these days. IMO if a woman has a history of unstable relationships, it means she has other priorities. Deep down, she most likely doesn't value stability, respect, and mutual support as much as she values other things. And if you're a respectful guy who's only interested in stable…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 10:55 AM
2

To me, the point of marriage is to raise healthy children while working to build a nice life together. If I can't do that, then I'm good. Marriage was never for me, the man. It was for the kids I thought I'd have. I won't need a caretaker, and I wouldn't expect a woman to take care of me these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 01:30 PM
3

I mean, if you're saying that men don't help keep society afloat and only bring bad things to the table (some mentioned by you in other comments here), then you are vilifying men. If we misinterpreted each other, then whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 05:54 PM
3

To say men are the only ones keeping society afloat is bullshit though. I agree. I didn't say that, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 05:25 PM
2

Do you think men help keep society afloat? Or do you think men only bring their flaws to the table?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 03:52 PM
6

See, the fact that you're itching to vilify men and glorify women says it all. It's not normal behavior. It's the fruit of bitterness. Are most men flawed? Certainly — and you can make a long list of common flaws. But they help keep society afloat.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 03:17 PM
5

With all due respect, I don't care whether or not I get a virtual pat on the back from you or anyone else. Also, not being a POS is normal. It doesn't deserve a pat on the back.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 02:54 PM
13

Enough with the threat narratives. Most men, as flawed as they are, help keep our society afloat; they're not violent criminals.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 02:17 PM
5

That chubby, uneducated single mom might really desire a tall, handsome, jacked, wealthy, charismatic dude, but such a dude probably doesn't want her for a stable long-term relationship, as he has much better options to choose from. Odd are that she will get with a dude who earns a bit more than her, though. And if she can jump to a higher status man later, she might go for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 02:07 PM
10

If we're talking stable LTRs, it's very rare. Does it happen? Of course. Is this the norm? Hell no. The only way it's even possible for it to be the norm is if most women are sharing men. But, yeah, nobody is entitled to shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 01:25 PM
–

It's just the coward's method for seizing power: paint yourself as the ultimate victim and concoct threat narratives against people of a certain group (most of them innocent) that you wish to weaken. Nothing you give them will ever be enough. The demands and self-victimization will never cease. Nobody I surround myself with expects for me to shoulder that nonsense. I don't have to pay for anything I didn't do.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 01:12 PM
2

I mean, I don't have to be a huge fan of something to do it together with a friend and so do my friends For sure. I get that. But life is short, and I don't develop very close friendships with women. I don't feel the desire to cling to things that don't benefit me anymore. I hate pretending. Either we click or we don't. Avoidance comes with the social label of being "that is masculine norm" so most don't even bother having a closer look at it. I became avoidant over the course of my 20s due to m…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 01:01 PM
2

I'm odd. I'm not a big movie or show guy. I watch like one show per year (aside from rewatching episodes of Always Sunny). I'm just now going through Better Call Saul (still on season 1 and I started in February), and last year I finished watching Succession. I rarely go to a movie theater because 99% of movies that come out nowadays don't interest me. I went to see Dune 2 with my friend like a year ago, as we both loved the books, and I'm going to see Warfare with him later this month. The wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 10:52 AM
3

Most men need to worry about taking care of the kids that ARE theirs. Uh, most men do. Y’all’s child abandonment rates are embarrassing. Again, most men aren't abandoning their children. Deadbeats are an embarrassment. Women who choose to reproduce with dudes who have countless baby mamas are an embarrassment.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 01:46 AM
20

For a LTR? I'd stay single. Relationships are a lot of work, and shitty relationships aren't worth a damn thing to me. In the real world, though, a dude who can only get with single moms isn't getting with a gorgeous single mom.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/25 11:57 PM
27

IME some women seem to prefer having as many safety nets as possible. Useful men might come in handy later. However, I don't think most women consciously view men that way. Other men's experiences, interests, and views are much more aligned with mine, so I prefer male friends. Growing up, I had a very close female friend; however, the older we got, the less we had in common. When we see each other, it's still hugs and all that, but there's not much to build a close friendship around at this poin…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/25 11:18 PM
6

The women who lack charm are not going to "fix themselves," so waiting for it to happen is pointless. Vilar expressed similar criticisms more than 50 years ago. Schopenhauer expressed similar criticisms nearly 175 years ago. For most people, romantic love isn't real. What other people choose to do doesn't concern me.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 10:48 AM
2

I'm in my early 30s. It's common for me to agree with women IRL. It's rare for me to agree with women on this subreddit — but a lot of that is just because the people on this subreddit are a lot different than the people who live around me. However, if someone comes here to subtly bully other people or revel in their suffering (which is clearly what a lot of them are doing), I'm not going to give them any kudos. There are more than a few older female posters here who do little more than stir up …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 09:07 PM
2

No, I'm pretty sure they're not here. The older women I look up to are empathetic and respectful. Also, researching is one thing. Being a 50+ YO woman and behaving like most of the women here do toward young dudes who are struggling in life is not normal; these women aren't doing anything positive here.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 07:59 PM
2

The vast majority of happy, grounded women I know don't spend hours each day lobbing thinly veiled insults at unattractive 20-something YO dudes who are struggling to find their footing in life. So I doubt it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 07:41 PM
-1

You're not wrong, but I've read an avalanche of bullshit about men here as well. To be honest, if the average woman around me was like the average female poster here, I'd never bother talking to a woman IRL again. When you see takes you disagree with, why not just engage civilly or ignore them?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 02:43 PM
3

It's just a silly generalization IMO because traditionally conservative men aren't the ones known for being in favor of abandoning their children. They're also against out-of-wedlock births in general. But you sound very grounded.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 02:37 PM
6

There's a lot of straw in that pile, but you and I would definitely disagree on quite a bit LOL. The free market will solve everything I mean, the steelman argument would attempt to make the point that capitalism is the best available option, not that it solves everything. The media is lying (unless it’s conservative media) All media pushes propaganda — except for the few (though I don't know of any) who only report the known facts without using loaded language or injecting their own takes.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 01:29 PM
3

IME traditional conservative (i.e., religious and family-oriented) men in general agree with me — but I'm not a tradcon (more of a libertarian/classical liberal), and people in my camp are probably less likely to agree with my take on deadbeats.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 01:18 PM
7

No, most of them are just people who disagree with a lot of what you believe. You seem very eager to dehumanize the opposite side of the aisle — and a lot of conservatives are guilty of doing the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 12:59 PM
3

It's just a typical straw man. Even among men who entertain the sob stories of deadbeats, the vast majority don't believe that every man is telling the truth. She's stating the obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 12:16 PM
8

Largely incapable of rational reasoning? That's pure hatred. I'm conservative and don't have an ounce of sympathy for any deadbeats. If you're of a sound mind and choose to engage in an activity that involves a very obvious risk, accept responsibility for the outcome. I don't care what options women have compared to you. I don't care how crazy the woman is; why didn't you vet her? You knew what the risks were going in. Learn how to control yourself and make better decisions.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 12:12 PM
3

Earned wages and household income will decline for most divorced women (as men are much more likely to be primary breadwinners and sole providers), which is what those studies tend to focus on. I know an older dude, a family friend, who was a doctor. Like 10+ years ago, he came home early one day and caught his wife cheating. Despite her infidelity, she ended up getting his ranch during the divorce. Surely, her household income declined significantly after divorce. However, she moved on to anoth…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 03:43 PM
8

Who IS the one that initiates divorce? The person who has given it their all, who has tried and tried and gotten nowhere. The person who is tired of being taken for granted and has finally accepted that the other person just doesn’t care enough to try. Sometimes, it's just the person who has less to lose financially — which, more often than not, is the woman. I have two male friends who want to divorce (and know that it's inevitable) but fear going through the process. They can't wait to get rid…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 01:59 PM
2

This has absolutely nothing to do with anyone "rolling in dough." As I said, men are significantly more likely to be the primary breadwinner or sole provider. If a dude isn't "rolling in dough," chances are good that his wife would be in an even worse financial situation than him if they split. Her pushing the eject button at that point would be really bold/foolish, especially considering how society will view her actions.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 12:43 AM
0

Have what stuff? Most people around me have assets and life insurance. Also, whatever you're referring to doesn't even have to apply to most people. The observed difference between the sexes wasn't that much.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 09:46 PM
5

No, we don't know that. A lot of people, men and women, are just users.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 08:45 PM
-2

I think it's likelier that the woman is staying for the inheritance and insurance payout, if anything. Men are much more likely to be sole providers or primary breadwinners. IME neither men nor women are more likely to be genuinely good human beings.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 08:41 PM
2

But you just said that the average dude isn't judged on his weight I never said that. I said they're judged more harshly in other ways. You managed to put words in my mouth. I'm glad you could at least make yourself feel better about being fat. Lying to yourself never makes you feel better in the long run. I'm not fat and see no reason to make excuses for being fat. It's easy to tell if someone's fat. Just get a tape measure and calculate their waist-to-hip ratio or waist-to-height ratio. Men ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 01:48 PM
1

So you agree that being fat isn't an insult towards men? No. I sure as shit wouldn't want to be fat — and I don't know any man who does. It's just men are more sensitive to other insults because they know they're judged more harshly in other ways. Uh huh. It's true. As that article points out, they should use waist-to height ratio (or waist-to-hip ratio) instead. It would be more telling. I mean, a jacked professional athlete like Derrick Henry is "obese" according to BMI. Ah, so....all of time?…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 01:26 PM
2

apparently it's only an insult if you're female for some reason It's an insult if you're a male too. However, dudes don't tend to gravitate towards "Healthy at Every Size" movements to justify their sloth and gluttony. And the average dude is more judged by his lack of status or lack of size more than anything else (unless he's ridiculously handsome, which is ridiculously rare). The average modern American dude is obese The average dude is certainly fat, especially after 30, but BMI tends to ove…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 12:55 PM
0

Old-school American male, sure. And what a throwback — I love to see it. The average modern American dude would have to ask his overweight "partner" (Howdy, partner!) for permission first, as he has a responsibility to help fund and raise other men's kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 11:38 AM
1

If I may ask, how do you know? People witnessed my grandmother riding a motorcycle with a German dude who had similar facial features to my aunt. Also, I can see it being true, because my aunt doesn't look like anybody else on my mom's side of the family (aside from my grandmother). So he was cheating in old age still? Who was he cheating with? Old women like him? I didn't ask. He told me that he fell in love with a younger Gypsy woman when he was in his 60s and had an affair with her that laste…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 09:16 PM
0

Just off the top of my head, there are a couple of things that could have an impact on the differences: First, women tend to be more sociotropic, making them more sensitive to criticism and how they're perceived by people in their social circle (and beyond). If I had to guess, it's probably partly due to the fact that women, on average, evolved to be significantly physically weaker and less physically imposing/intimidating than men, so they tend to be more concerned about maintaining a virtuous …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 06:33 PM
5

No worries. I can laugh about it now. In retrospect, the whole thing was ridiculous. But that messed me up for a couple of years. Well, it messed me up permanently in some ways, of course, but I was in limbo for a couple of years. In a lot of ways, I'm better than ever now.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 03:46 PM
4

I agree with most of what you wrote, but I mentioned high-quality men (in all ways). High-quality men aren't doing that shit. A long-term relationship with an average man is nearly worthless, and women know that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 03:45 PM
1

Trust me, there's no bitterness anymore. There's just radical acceptance. It's probably impossible for you to see my perspective, though, so I don't blame you for thinking that. That said, I've lived my life for long time and am more than comfortable with my situation. Not everyone is meant to have a "partner"; however, that doesn't give anyone an excuse to be bitter or cause other people pain IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 03:16 PM
1

Oh, for sure. I know it would never be enough for the vast majority, but I don't have anything else to give at this point. Thing is, I'm 99.99% sure I'd rather be single for the rest of my life, as I haven't had any motivation to pursue anyone since my last relationship ended 3-4 years ago. I'm just not ruling out the 0.01% chance that I stumble upon someone before it's too late to have a healthy family. If the stars align, so be it; if not, I'm going to continue dedicating the rest of my life t…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 03:05 PM
4

She treated me better than anyone I've ever met — like a king, with daily massages. This went on for more than half a decade. She constantly told me how much she loved me and was ridiculously affectionate, which is probably why affection really rubs me the wrong way now. She really liked me and respected me. She just didn't find me physically attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 02:57 PM
7

It's pretty clear that women really value sex from the short-term guy. He doesn't have to do much to get it. What I'm saying is the short-term dude can get everything the long-term dude gets and more. The long-term woman who lands a high-quality man can get everything the short-term woman gets and more.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 02:54 PM
2

Assuming I can find someone I trust enough, I'll give her the best life that I can. I just don't really enjoy receiving affection anymore due to my past. At this point, I wouldn't expect her to be capable of loving me like that anyway. Mutual respect would be enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 01:50 PM
2

I already explained. IRL It's much easier to tell even in videos compared to photos. I don't feel an attraction towards them. Also, I prefer women who wear much makeup. And I don't want to date anyone who I can't build a family with. I'd rather stay single. I'm not they type of dude who's into the lovey-dovey stuff anymore; I got that out of the way in my 20s.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 01:29 PM
3

I don't see many happy relationships around me. If I did, I'd probably have a different view. "They seem happy, but she's actually settling and using him for his money, we can't see that, but I know the truth" I lived this, though. I found out my last ex didn't find me attractive, but she loved me and everybody (including myself) thought we were perfect. So the shit random Redditors say isn't going to convince me of anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 01:25 PM
2

Them existing doesn't bother me; I'm living my own life. However, I'm not attracted to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 01:09 PM
2

I wish women would raise their standards and stick to them, actually. Anyway, the short-term dude receives genuine affection. The long-term dude pays for a fake romantic relationship with a person who will eventually grow to resent him. she has to take care of the house 24/7, take care of the kids, feed them etc etc and still go 50/50 Nowadays, there's a good chance the long-term dude is going to help raise another man's kids, as there are a lot of single moms in the dating pool. Any kids he has…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 01:07 PM
2

I don't really see the pros of being a beta in the long run, especially in this culture, but that's just me. It comes down to what the individual wants.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 01:03 PM
2

I live in a rural area in the Deep South, so it's possible but very unlikely. I saw a crossdresser staring at me in a movie theater bathroom in the early aughts, but that's about it. And when I lived in Europe (both times), I lived in a very Christian area.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 01:02 PM
1

Except the Madonna gets everything the man has to offer. The beta is used for his money and emotional support and has to jump through endless hoops to receive affection. IMO the short-term dude and the long-term woman have it the best.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 12:45 PM
3

What you see IRL, with a person's mannerisms and voice (and without excellent lighting and filters), is a lot different than what you see in cherry-picked photos, and women admit this all the time when it comes to men. For me—and probably a lot of other dudes—it's like an uncanny valley situation at best.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 11:02 AM
35

No. I'm not physically attracted to people who were born men. I wouldn't be open to it. Excluding the point of maybe wanting to have kids in the future That's the thing: If I can't do that with a person down the line, then I'm not interested in dating. I'd rather be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 10:18 PM
7

Kids have to live with all of the shit that their parents pile on them. If a person wants to give their son a feminine name in an effort to progress humanity towards "gender equality," I can only imagine what other baggage they'd saddle him with. To Americans, I have an odd name (that most can't even pronounce properly), so I know what it's like to get bullied for your name early in life, but I don't understand why anyone would be eager to make their son's life worse for no good reason. As a par…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/25 04:21 PM
10

Gender equality? Most women desire men who are better than them across the board: taller, stronger, smarter, more experienced, wealthier, etc. Naming your son Karen or Susan isn't going to change human nature; it will probably just make his life more difficult.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/25 03:39 PM
3

That's part of it for many. I know people like that for sure. However, I think there are also people who fall for the sunk-cost fallacy, such as my grandmother. My grandfather told me that they had my dad because my grandmother wanted to save their marriage. To some degree, I guess it worked, because by the time my grandmother passed away, she was married to my grandfather for 60+ years. My grandfather also told me that he felt like my grandmother was holding him back due to her miserable attitu…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 07:43 PM
1

I don't think women only go for assholes at all, but I do think that women are more attracted to genuine assholes than they are to 80% of men (i.e., average-looking men and below). Some women are just wiser than others.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 02:28 PM
4

Sure, they're the primary selectors — though the vast majority of women can never "select" dudes above their RMV for long-term relationships because those dudes would never commit to them. However, none of that goes against OP's main point. Perhaps you agree with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 12:47 PM
14

It's that a lot of them are just so... unremarkable. The vast majority of people are unremarkable. The average woman is far from remarkable herself. In fact, she's likely an overweight person with an average job, average facial features, and a basic personality. If you're an unfuckable loser, it's because you suck in some fashion. Most are just physically unattractive. If you want to say they "suck," that's cool. Deadbeats "suck," but sucking doesn't prevent a lot of those dudes from having seve…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 12:24 PM
12

Highly unlikely. I don't think she cheated on any of the dudes who treated her like garbage. The only guy she cheated on (that I'm aware of) was her husband. Ironically, he was a good guy and did everything in his power to take care of her & her kids. This part reminds me of my grandfathers. The one on my father's side cheated on my grandmother until he was in his 70s. Dude looked me in the eyes and told me he never loved my grandmother while she was in the other room with my ex fiancee. Despite…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 10:31 AM
7

Marriage itself does not protect a person from a scumbag. Aside from you, who said that? It's not the marriage itself. Through his actions, a guy who's willing to go through the rigmarole of courting and marriage is demonstrating some level of humility, patience, responsibility, sacrifice, and a genuine desire for something serious with a specific woman. If all a woman can get from a dude are empty promises and his you-know-what, good luck to her. Sure, both dudes can turn out to be "scumbags," …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/25 08:14 PM
–

Some men marry ugly women. That doesn't mean the vast majority of men don't prefer beautiful women. The vast majority of women don't have a chance in hell of bagging a decent-looking rich man for stable LTRs. Those men are rare and coveted. A lot of women settle, and a small percentage of women have other priorities.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/25 01:43 PM
–

When you find that oasis in the desert, there's a very good chance that all it has to offer is mucky swamp water anyway. As a man, you're doing all that trekking for the same toxic shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 04:06 PM
–

She's very physically attractive IMO. However, the only times my friends or I mention her is when mocking some of the dumb shit she says or does. She seems to have histrionic tendencies and always pulls attention to herself, so she's always in the limelight.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 06:43 PM
2

Ha. I was born in Europe, but I moved to the US when I was 5 or 6. I grew up in a southern farming town of roughly 3,000 people, so I can relate. Everybody knew everybody. I was screwed too. I think there were like 50-60 people in my graduating class. Half of us jetted as soon as we got our diplomas, but the nearby cities aren't that big. My handsome friend outcompeted me for the one decent woman who was into me. She and I were close for a long time. I love both of them, so no hard feelings, and…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 11:12 PM
4

You're not wrong. However, after a certain point, the vast majority of single women are either single moms, women who don't take care of themselves, "reformed" thug chasers looking to try something new, promiscuous women who can't sustain stable relationships, brainwashed feminists, or women who think they deserve the princess treatment from hot and wealthy men yet can't get it. Many are a combination of several. For a lot of dudes, none of those women elicit any desire to provide or protect. Wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 10:41 PM
8

I'm not sacrificing my sanity or freedom for what's on offer at this point. If I were to find someone who shares my values (someone who values her health and body, for starters), sure. But the vast majority of women in my league are far from that. I thought I found that person last time and sacrificed quite a lot for her (as she did for me), but she ended up banging another dude. The worst part is that she was the sweetest and most respectful woman I've ever met aside from that incident. Now, no…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 10:01 PM
5

Why would you expect most men to sacrifice for most women? Are most women worth sacrificing for? Also, I don't have any interest in SAHMs. We have modern technology. It doesn't take that long for me to clean my place or wash my clothes, and I enjoy cooking my own food from scratch. No thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 09:37 PM
10

I'll always strive to be physically and mentally strong, because that's necessary for me to thrive, and I think it's pathetic for a man to strive to be anything other than that. However, I'm not interested in being responsible for an ungrateful 304 who can upend my life at any time. I'm not emotionally attracted to today's average train wreck, who's less virtuous and more demanding than ever. The average woman doesn't deserve that type of sacrifice from a man IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 09:24 PM
–

Thanks. I'll be digging into Lewis' apologetics soon. I'm leaning towards Orthodoxy, and I've been toying with the idea for 2-3 years; I think I'm ready now. There's a small Orthodox church nearby, and I want to join the community. Recently, I read Seraphim Rose's short book on Nihilism, and it resonated with me quite a bit. I was raised a Catholic, but I don't see myself going back to Catholicism for many reasons. I stopped attending church after my confirmation, which will be 18 years ago next…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 05:44 PM
–

Due to the fallen and corrupt nature of humanity, none of us can love perfectly. See, it seems like some Christians are the only people around me who realize this while striving to be better. The older I get, the more I'm drawn to Christianity, especially now that I truly understand faith and its virtues.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 12:41 PM
–

I've always been loyal because I value loyalty. I can't live with myself otherwise. I'd rather be single than hurt someone I care about. But, yeah, other than that, I agree with most of what you wrote here. In the long run, I don't expect loyalty from a woman. She'll be with another dude sooner or later. The best I can hope for is respect and loyalty in the short run, which I've enjoyed in the past. I'll never settle for less than that. I'm at peace with it, and I'll do whatever is necessary to …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 12:20 PM
–

And women want to bang the hunkiest, richest, most devilish MFer around. They "love" good genes and resources, and they'll pretend to "love" you as long as they can benefit from it. How is any of this surprising? Men evolved to be drawn to women who can birth healthy offspring, and women evolved to be drawn to men who can manipulate their environment to their benefit (and provide good genes for their offspring). For the most part, love is bullshit, and romantic relationships are all conditional …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 11:07 AM
9

Sure. But by Blue Pillers (and specifically blooper dudes, who are eager to say that to men)? I've never seen that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:50 PM
2

I think they just assume that women are more beautiful than men, as they find a very small percentage of men to be physically attractive (failing to account for the fact that men and women evolved to have different advantages). However, that would be like calling a 5'10" dude "tall" because he's half a foot taller than the average woman. In reality, he's average. When it comes to monogamous pairings, it's about how women compare to other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:49 PM
5

Exactly. Are loser women eager to get into long-term relationships with loser men? Can they accept that they're losers? Are bloopers going to encourage those women to lower their standards for stable LTRs as well? I doubt it. Why the hell should anyone be with someone they're not attracted to? Just control what you can control. If it happens, it happens. Not everyone is capable of being a good, attractive partner, and not everyone is meant to have a stable, rewarding romantic relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:04 PM
5

Most unattractive dudes struggle to find partners. Money can help, sure, but most men can't be high earners. Ugly men with pretty GFs are outliers. I know ugly and average women with handsome husbands as well. Those are also outliers.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:59 AM
2

Yet somehow both the ugliest dudes you know and the most handsome guys are all dating "pretty" women—even though there are more young men than young women. It doesn't make any sense. Are the disabled and fat guys all dating pretty women too?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:47 AM
9

So there's just a virtually unlimited amount of pretty women? Interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:42 AM
8

the ugliest men i know all have pretty girlfriends Who are the handsome dudes dating and sleeping with then?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:40 AM
1

So they're just craving dominant men? Feminism was a revolt against the previous monogamous setup, which wasn't appealing to most women either. Women don't want to be underneath most men. they need to concoct the most extreme possible fantasy to make them strong in order to make them attractive again. Dominance and wealth seem to be constants in female fantasies. I don't think women evolved to be attracted to the average man of any time period; they likely evolved to be attracted to healthy, vir…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/25 05:36 PM
1

It's still kinda due to your appearance or some other flaws. I've rarely had a chance with women I'd actually want to be in a relationship with, but I know that I'd have way significantly more options if I were actually a good-looking dude (so I probably wouldn't have been single for so long). It's not really worth worrying about IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/25 01:29 AM
1

There's no reason to be depressed about it, and it's definitely possible to be "not boring" and "not a literal psychopath." I don't think dudes benefit from dating women who want dark triad men anyway. Who cares if most women are like that to a certain degree? Good women can control that impulse. IMO the best would be to become a fun, fit, confident, kind, tough, wise, courageous, charismatic, successful man (which is even more rare) and never give a shit about what most women find attractive, e…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 11:19 AM
2

Well, they do, but most women cannot have stable LTRs with physically attractive men, so they have to take other things into consideration when choosing a long-term partner. (Plus, they can always cheat with those guys if they really want.) I'm talking about average men (i.e., men who will never be in the top whatever percent of physical attractiveness due to immutable characteristics). I think looks and status are pretty much all that matter for male attractiveness. After that, confidence and s…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 09:45 PM
2

Sure (though married dudes tend to earn more, especially over the long run), and some people get together out of convenience. But that's not what drives a lot dudes to shack up with women IME, as men tend to have different priorities (not necessarily more noble ones). I don't have any interest in it, so that probably makes me a bit biased. I'd rather enjoy a comfortable life on my own than live with a woman for money.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 04:44 PM
2

So? That doesn't change the fact that women care more about their potential partner's salary. If I earn 20k more than my gf, we could still be in the same social class. We might still interact with a lot of the same people each day.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 03:46 PM
1

Most non-disabled adults have "an income." I'm not talking about merely "having an income."
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 03:32 PM
2

On average, married women and single women earn almost the same across all age ranges. Women care about their potential partner's earnings more than men do. The average man is viewed as unattractive by most women. Most women can't get stable LTRs with attractive men, so they eventually settle for compatible dudes who can at least double their income.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 03:26 PM
0

Single women earn a bit more than married women, but married men earn way more than single men. You said women have already settled, but it's clear that a person's earning potential appeals a lot more to women than men for obvious reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 03:13 PM
4

Well, everything is a bit transactional, but not all women are like that. However, I think only a small percentage are actually worth dating. That's why it's important to socialize as much as possible and meet high-quality women in your 20s IMO. There's nothing to lose.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 02:44 PM
1

Young women are less likely to be single, though, and the average married man earns significantly more than the average married woman (and the average single man). Aside from a warm personality, the average woman's appeal is her beauty. The average man's appeal is his status (paired with high social skills and confidence). Only one of these tends to improve over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 02:19 PM
10

For sure. I definitely can't love a woman like I loved in my 20s. I can never build anything from scratch with them, and I definitely can't trust them wholeheartedly. On top of that, a lot of them have kids and/or are still in touch with exes (and we all know young women tend to have excellent tastes in men). For me, serious relationships just get more and more unappealing over time. The same standards don't apply because a lot of women (not all) love money and status more than anything, and the…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 02:06 PM
10

Yet 30-49 YO men are significantly less likely to be single than younger men. There are many reasons for that. Hot, fit, super-successful people are rare. Most people are average. The average woman doesn't earn much money; she has average intelligence, average drive, average looks, etc. Shacking up with a dude who earns at least as much as she does enables her to more than double her income (and eventually secure a decent retirement while boosting her social status). We should stop pretending th…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 02:02 PM
3

I'm 33. I have instant access to any information I want. I can watch endless online tutorials, and I can order pretty much any book and have it delivered within the next few days. My great grandparents weren't going on fancy vacations or riding in boats all day on a blue collar salary. That's Western boomer shit. The ride was nice while it lasted, but that type of lifestyle has never been normal for any other average man throughout human history. Accept it and move on. Life is short for everyone…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 07:46 PM
4

you guys are in for a rough ride. How are we in for a rough ride? My great grandfathers were practically malnourished. They worked in mines and fought in trenches; I think my life is pretty awesome in comparison. In the US, it's easier than ever to learn anything that interests you, eat clean food, and do whatever the hell you want to do — especially on your own. "Romantic love" and the idea of women as "partners"? It was all bullshit from the beginning. It's just way easier to notice now that w…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 06:31 PM
2

Uptalk: “a manner of speaking in which declarative sentences are uttered with rising intonation at the end, as if they were questions.” That's what I mean, though. I always thought uptalk was when people ended their sentences with a higher pitch, like many annoying online content creators and Valley girls do. I'm talking about a woman raising her pitch throughout the interaction and then immediately lowering it back down after being rejected. You should have taken Linguistics, it’s fascinating t…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 03:29 PM
2

It's not uptalk; combined with the other behaviors, it's straight up flirting. And raising your voice an octave throughout a sentence isn't uptalk, as far as I know. Some men can see straight through it, while others can't. The point is that they're flirting in order to try to get something out of me. They're attempting to use me for something. And, again, I'm not complaining. It's natural. I'm saying that many women seek to use men for countless things outside of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 03:02 PM
1

Men do this too. My point is that men tend to do this for sex, whereas women don't give a damn about getting sex from average-looking men, so they tend to approach men for other things. I'm not complaining. I'm just telling the truth. Neither sex is morally superior.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 02:43 PM
1

I don't recall whining. I thought we were having a civil discussion. If you're only acting sweet because you want someone to do something for you, then you are the problem. Here's what I'm talking about: You're minding your business doing something, and some woman comes in acting flirty and asking you for help later. You say you're busy (because you are), and all of the sudden her behavior changes. Her voice goes back to normal; her body loosens up; she stops being nice. I can recognize it's all…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 02:36 PM
1

Kind of amusing that you claim founders of religions have women’s best interests in mind, when women are utilized as wombs. Producers of followers; the supply chain for insanely wealthy and powerful men. I never made that claim. They don't give a fuck about other men (their potential competition either) Wealthy and powerful men run the world and attract most of the women. That's how it will always be. You don’t feel obligated to help your own family? JFC, how much effort did your mother put into…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 02:22 PM
1

Obviously??? Why else would women take the risk to have sex if it wasn’t really fucking awesome? Pretty sure the three major religions figured out how to make men demonstrate their commitment first. We got rid of all that, so we're back to a low-trust market. That was the trade off. What things do women ask of you? For the most part, doing something at work or helping with some heavy lifting at home. In college, it was the same thing with homework and tutoring. (And my exes did the same.) I thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 02:04 PM
2

Bullshit. There is no bigger risk than a woman who takes off her clothes with a man. The risks range from violence to lifelong commitment to raising a child from birth to death, and women do it all the time. If it's really that risky, why are they doing it? They're that thirsty? LOL. I doubt it. Honey, women don’t even notice the difference between men and women unless a man is someone they are actively attracted to. “Men” are merely humans. Neuters. Just another random person deserving of respe…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 01:46 PM
0

IMO men are just more willing to say things that will elicit social backlash. They're also bigger risk-takers on average. Women will say all of that shit behind your back (or think those things), but they fear social shame more than anything IME. A decent chunk of men DGAF about social shame, so they're willing to tell you exactly how they feel. Also, many women use men for favors. They use men for money. I don't think women are any kinder towards the opposite sex; they just have more uses for t…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 01:29 PM
1

Because men despise unattractive women, older women, and unavailable women. Most normal dudes just don't think those women are worth the sacrifice or risk. That doesn't mean they despise them. That's like saying women despise short, broke, or socially inept men. In reality, women just don't care about those dudes unless they bring something worthwhile to the table. It's all transactional, and humans act on incentives.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 01:14 PM
7

That's not what it said. It said that most of women's messages went to below average men. Also, the average dude sent 13-15 messages, whereas the average woman sent 3-4. However, the vast majority of men were rated below average. Consider what that means: A man in the 75th percentile was considered below average in attractiveness (rated by women overall) despite the fact that he was above average (for a man) when it came to success on the apps. And women sent significantly fewer messages. The av…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 11:39 AM
3

If all men did that, most of them would be "strengthening themselves" for the opportunity to shack up with an overweight woman who is raising another man's kids and/or has a load of debt (and emotional baggage). Honestly, most men will probably end up doing that regardless. Should men build themselves up anyway? Hell yeah. However, it goes both ways. There aren't enough winners for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/25 12:32 PM
1

Especially if you're a young woman who wants kids one day. Yep. I wish more women would actually follow through on this, though. The world would probably be a much better place if women were actually picky and most just accepted that they can't land the right dude. Not everyone is meant to have kids IMO. Women online hoot and holler about how they'd rather stay single; unfortunately, real life says the opposite. The vast majority of them gotta have what other women have. Dare I say it- I miss be…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/25 12:24 PM
5

Sure, very few things in life are guaranteed, and the average man can hardly practice self-control. (Just look at his waist size.) However, the outcome shouldn't really be surprising. It's like an old, average-looking dude with money being surprised that his 25 YO wife with an abundance mentality and endless options doesn't really give a shit about him. I don't have any sympathy for either, really.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 08:47 PM
2

Sure, I can see that, and it goes both ways. I definitely have a biased perspective. I think ugly people either become very cold and hardened or act overly nice just to avoid putting up with the world's bullshit. I'm a fairly ugly dude, and I tend to use both approaches depending on the situation (and how I feel that day). IME the worst people are typically insecure average-looking people who think they're the shit, as they're desperate to prove that they're better than others. For the most part…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 07:09 PM
1

Yeah, I know. I'm saying that those dudes don't have much to offer from her perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 07:03 PM
9

No, it assumes that the dude with an abundance mentality and infinite options is likelier to do so, which is probably true. I'm not going to sit here and act like ugly dudes wouldn't do it at the same rate in the same position, but the truth is that ugly dudes have a scarcity mentality, which tends to make people more desperate and clingy. more logical for women to pursue men they at least find attractive Agreed. But don't settle for marriage then. Chase the hot dude until you get him.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 07:01 PM
4

Oh, there's a line of simps, but they can't give her anything close to what she considers "the world."
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 05:44 PM
5

Some women do act like that. And there is a line of simps ready to step up. Give her the world? Well, very few men on the planet can do that, and very few women are worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 05:40 PM
11

I never asserted that. Magical trap? It's very easy to avoid, which is why I have little empathy for most people who complain about dudes not sticking around.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 05:25 PM
5

Yes?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 05:12 PM
13

I think the point is that you shouldn't be surprised if you're an average woman and top dudes pump and dump you. You're competing with the creme de la creme for LTRs. IMO very physically attractive people, men and women, are better people on average because they're treated better by society, but that's just my controversial take.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 05:09 PM
7

To me, it's only a genuine compliment if it comes from like 1% of women. If it comes from women who sleep around, hop in and out of relationships, or date morons, it's an insult, because those women clearly don't value "husband material."
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 04:16 PM
3

The ones I'm talking about never even went to college. I'm talking about a few dudes I know who are straight up deadbeat criminals yet have several baby mommas, some whom graduated from college. I don't think enough dudes understand how attractive genuine bravado is to a chunk of the female population, particularly young women and foolish older women. I think the demand for those types of dudes is outpacing the supply, which is one of the reasons why they're so successful with women compared to …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 03:29 PM
4

I don't think you're necessarily correct. I think one issue is that it feeds those men's scarcity mindset (which is already pretty bad considering that it's rare to find women who are even remotely attracted to them). They hear women complaining about these dudes nonstop, yet they see these lowlifes hopping from woman to woman (and knocking many of them up); as a result, they begin to believe that women who aren't into dudes like that are very rare, as they're having very little success with wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 11:39 AM
8

I know several gorgeous women who had kids with short, broke, scrawny, tatted thugs, so I'm not really buying that last sentence. I think for some women, the bravado and dark triad traits are enough to elicit attraction. For most women, no, but those dudes definitely have an appeal that the average dude doesn't. Average dudes are just boring and even keel.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 11:27 AM
2

It's not really something that any dude I know would be interested in unless they're taking their children. Even as a kid, I never liked Disney movies (aside from The Lion King), and I still haven't seen a Marvel movie after Iron Man. (That said, I probably would've loved to go as a child.) I'd certainly go somewhere else with my parents.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 02:12 PM
1

Honestly, that's idiotic IMO. There's a very easy fix for that hunger, and a little self-control never hurt any of us. To me, B is the easy choice. Still, both dudes are cooked in their own way. B is cooked because he seems naive and childish.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 01:04 PM
1

B. No question. I'm 33 and likely won't date again, so it wouldn't be that big of a deal to me. But going to Disney World (with mommy, nonetheless) as a childless 30+ YO dude? Inching toward middle age and obsessing over some woman you don't even know who lives in another state? LOL. Dafuq.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 12:55 PM
13

Years ago, lived with a chick who posted on that sub. We met after chatting on this sub. Spoiler alert: She wasn't alone. She was getting hit on often, and she eventually cheated. I'm not saying all of them are like that, of course, but that was my experience with one. And that was the last time I took online dating of any kind seriously. I'd rather meet someone organically or stay single.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 02:53 PM
–

IDK. Seems like the three biggest religions figured it out a long time ago — though they didn't necessarily understand why. Now a bunch of dudes who grew up in secular cultures are figuring it out again and acting like it's never been known. Hell, just one a quick skim through a history book will show you how messed up human nature is.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 12:22 PM
1

Can you please link to a source that mentions that part (about first messages rather than just messages in general)?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/25 05:51 PM
4

A very small percentage of the entire US population is homeless at any given time. We're talking about less than a quarter of 1 percent of the US population. And less than a third of the homeless population in the US is female. Anyway, average-looking women can get free meals if they want; they just need to use dating apps or post thirst traps on social media. Women can pretend to like men and enter relationships (and potentially be supported and genuinely loved by a man in a decent position) if…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 08:35 AM
1

Being "traditional" in a world where your wife, who has most likely has slept around at some point (and may have even had kids with other men), can cheat on you and get rewarded by the courts (and cheered on by the people around her) is dumb AF. I'm certain that I can cook better than the vast majority of women (and actually enjoy doing it). There's nothing "traditional" about the current setup, so no. I'm not playing any role in a game of pretend.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 11:17 AM
3

IMO a lot of guys eventually lose the ability to love idealistically by their 30s or 40s. After you get cheated on or discarded by a woman you helped build up for years, you may snap out of it and start to view things more transactionally. Not every dude, though. Some men are suckers for life.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/25 01:17 PM
1

I think TRP is right about plenty of things. However, I can't take a Red Piller's gripes about degeneracy seriously. TRP is capitulation to degeneracy. That becomes evident when they chant, "Enjoy the decline." I don't want any part of the decline.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 06:29 PM
1

I think using a man for money is just as bad. Those women barely see their "partners" as human beings. And I'm sure you can find TRPers who actually like their partners for whatever reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:55 PM
1

FDS is about finding a rich dude who will pamper you. They're looking for men to use.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 01:07 PM
1

As far as your last sentence goes, I don't get that feeling at all. And I don't think I would agree with an actual misandrist woman's or misogynistic man's idea of a "good man" or "good woman."
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/25 08:38 PM
1

I think people should distrust random people, and I agree that nobody should take it personally. But genuinely disliking individuals that you don't even know? That's foolish. A lot of women speak poorly of men in general. Do I think that those women are terrible people? No. Most of them are likely just immature, lost, or hurt as well. IMO it's up to each individual, male or female, to earn another individual's trust. Women are no exception.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 07:15 PM
1

Aside from being cheated on and lied to, the only times women have treated me poorly was when they were in a group and I was by myself. That's when they feel comfortable doing it IME. And you said in the previous response that only some men are bad people (according to women), so that must mean that most men are decent. I don't think I'm a good man or special for treating women well; I think that's par for the course.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 06:42 PM
1

After a certain point, yeah, especially if they don't take care of themselves. Fit, knowledgeable, experienced, skilled men who are in their 30s, 40s, and 50s are probably the most masculine and command the most respect. Also, men are not drawn to charisma, wealth, and genuine confidence (all of which take time to develop and are components of perceived masculinity) as much as women are. For the most part, men are drawn to looks, warm personalities, and fertility (men who want to have families, …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 06:36 PM
3

Yep. And it's not just calories. The type of food you eat has a significant impact on your body composition. Here's one example: 15 baked tater tots provide you with 228 calories and 2.5 grams of protein. 3 large boiled eggs provide you with 234 calories and 18.9 grams of protein. Regardless of which of the two you choose, you'll consume 220-235 calories, but one food will support muscle mass a lot more than the other. (Also, consider that foods like eggs are a complete protein source — containi…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 04:49 PM
1

I'd say that's a bit disingenuous. A lot of those men are upset at women for viewing all men as bad people by default. That doesn't necessarily mean those men have misogynistic fantasies. How do you jump straight to that? Many of them are likely just immature, lost, and hurt, and the same goes for women who do that to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 04:11 PM
1

Well, I don't think most men are the men that women complain about. Most men are not sociopathic, violent individuals. That said, I think it's wise for women (and men) to be cautious of random people to a reasonable extent.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 01:24 PM
1

That's fair. I can sympathize, which is part of the reason why I don't take it personally, but I don't think that makes me a "good" guy. For example, I wouldn't put my life on the line for the average woman on the street; I would for my family. IMO good guys are selfless. I've met a few of those guys, and I'm not that guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 01:20 PM
1

I don't think it makes sense to harbor resentment toward individuals who haven't done anything to you yet, but I think it makes sense to harbor suspicion until someone proves to be trustworthy. I don't trust random people. Power tends to corrupt, and average women are in a position of power (relative to law-abiding average men) due to the women-are-wonderful effect.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 01:16 PM
2

Different in what way? Every dude is different. I don't take it personally because I know it's based on their past experiences and observations — and there are plenty of biases involved. It's not based on what I've actually done. Most women will take my distrust of them personally. It's not personal, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 12:57 PM
4

It's really that simple. A lot of our biggest problems come from overindulgence and a lack of self-control on an individual level.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 11:34 AM
3

Of course not. I find them to be the only stomachable romantic relationships. I don't have the patience to deal with someone who will make my life worse. I think this is one of the biggest reasons why it's a good idea to steer clear of women with wild pasts. There's a good chance that they're eventually going to start craving that novelty and spontaneity again, and there's not a sane man on the planet who can give those types of women what they want in the long run.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 11:44 AM
1

Only if you put yourself in that position. Just don't waste money on them or get married.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 03:40 AM
–

Why should anyone care? Date whoever you want, and treat people well. Call me whatever-phobic. My life will go on.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 11:14 AM
1

Well, yeah, I never claimed that dating apps had anything to do with it. Fertile women and the most powerful men are the choosers. The vast majority of women want a handsome, powerful man, and there are very, very few of them, so that makes them even more valuable IMO. Dating apps have just made it infinitely easier for women and top dudes to seek out new options. There's always something new around the corner — at least when it comes to short-term relationships (because stable long-term relatio…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 08:40 PM
1

Are you competing against men or something? Who cares? Pretty much all women have a lot options, especially for short-term relationships. Beyond a certain amount of options, it really doesn't matter. If you have a lot of options, you have a lot of options; you're never going to go through all of them anyway. For men, it's closer to a feast or famine situation. The dudes at the top have a lot of options, and the dudes in the middle and below have very few. Most women and the top dudes operate wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 08:13 PM
1

Like most women, top dudes (i.e., physically attractive, charismatic, and wealthy men) have endless options for both casual relationships and LTRs. The average dude has to enter a LTR to get laid consistently. Either he accepts what's on offer every now and then or stays single. A top dude? Not at all. He needs a really good reason to commit.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 07:20 PM
1

I don't understand what the problem is. Women are inundated with attention from men, and average women get plenty of messages.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 05:44 PM
7

IMO women want powerful, influential men who can manipulate their environment to their benefit, and being socially awkward makes that very difficult for a man to achieve (unless he possesses other traits that enable him to do so — like looks, size and strength, talent, wealth, etc.).
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 05:35 PM
1

Women still message average men more than the top 10%. As you mentioned, women barely message. And what study are you referencing? The study I linked to found that both men and women tend to focus their attention on the most attractive people.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 05:26 PM
1

Again, the average woman got 4.5 times as many messages as the average man. The amount of messages an average woman gets is plenty from the average man's perspective, as most men barely get any. And, clearly, it's not like most women are dying to get attention from men outside of the top quintile.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 05:15 PM
0

My point is that average women get plenty of messages, and women (regardless of their attractiveness) also gravitate toward the most attractive people of the opposite sex. I actually meant to respond to your other comment above — the one about average women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 05:06 PM
1

Kreager et. al (2014) found that less than 10% of women in the lowest quintile of desirability sent any messages to men at a similar desirability level. More than half sent messages to men in the highest quintiles. The study also found that men were 10 times more likely to receive zero messages, and that the average man received 4.5 times fewer messages than the average woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 04:20 PM
2

I'm neither hot nor wealthy, so no.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 04:01 AM
–

Gaining some weight is normal. Becoming more than twice your size and continuing to balloon for several years afterward is not. Those women might be severely depressed or something, but I don't think our modern lifestyles and diets are conducive to good health. And this is really only something I've seen here in the South. I never saw this amount of permanent weight gain among my European relatives and family friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 02:10 AM
2

Why would you not expect them to be in the minority? As I said, most people have already paired up by then. Two women I graduated with had kids with 45+ YO wealthy, fit dudes when they were in their late 20s. Back then, I though it was weird (and still kinda do), but their marriages outlasted my last LTR, an they still have happy, intact families. Dudes like that are rare to begin with, so yeah. If a dude is a short, fat, bald bum, he should expect his options to be very limited. However, succes…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 07:55 PM
2

Well, yeah, but the vast majority of 50 YO dudes are broke and/or out of shape — and most most dudes are already paired up or divorced by then. Also, large age gaps are much more common in second marriages. I don't think I'd even risk having kids past 40.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 07:41 PM
2

That specifically? No. I'm inferring it based on the fact that a very small percentage of them are single in that age range. Those women are creeping towards infertility, so their window is closing. It would make a lot of sense for them to settle for the best they can get before their window closes entirely. Older women (50+) are more likely to be single, yeah. But those women are infertile, so it makes sense as well. Meanwhile, older men are less likely to be single. Men tend to have kids at a …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 07:23 PM
–

I'm saying I'd prefer if they didn't settle.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 07:12 PM
4

Because it's the women in the 30-49 age range who seem to be the most likely to settle. If you look at the 2022 Pew data, for example, it seems that there's actually a slightly larger percentage of young men (18-29) who are neither in a relationship nor looking to be in any type of relationship. AFAIK there's not much reliable data to indicate that women are more okay with being single. What we have is data showing that young men are more likely to be single, and considering that a lot of dudes …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 07:04 PM
4

Problem is that modern women are not getting to that desperation phase and modern men hate it. All of the statistics indicate that the vast majority of women are paired up. So I'm not buying that. A lot of us don't want to be with women who are settling. That's the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 06:47 PM
–

That's cool. Women should do whatever they want; it's not for me to demand them to do anything. I was answering the OP's question.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 04:53 PM
–

I'm not saying they should be required to do anything. I'm describing what I would prefer in an ideal world. Also, I'm really talking about women who sleep around without protection and actually get impregnated by idiots or very attractive dudes who clearly don't want to commit to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 04:48 PM
–

I've been engaged to a woman who settled, and I don't have any interest in experiencing that again. Trust me, I'm not arguing for anyone to settle; I'm arguing for the opposite. The top dude is still typically going to be a guy who has both a good bone structure and high-earning potential, along with a list of other things. There's only a small percentage of men who fit those criteria; among that small group of men, there will be plenty of variance, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 03:19 PM
–

That is one form of "alpha," but that doesn't mean it's good IMO. I think that the handsome, selfless, intelligent, brave leader and father figure is also alpha, and I think that's a much healthier version. It's just a lot rarer.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:57 PM
–

No, you're misunderstanding me. I think picking good men (i.e., handsome, fun, kind, wealthy, intelligent, etc.) is ideal. I'm saying they should wait for those men. IMO what they do to inflate their egos is sleep around and use men they're not really attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:47 PM
–

Most women don't qualify for commitment from a top dude. I don't think there's anything wrong with settling if you can accept that you settled for your equal; however, if you're going to treat your husband like shit after securing your marriage, it would've been better for you (and your kids and the dude) to stay single and wait for an attractive dude instead of settling.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:44 PM
–

How is it reinforcing anything? OP presented two options. I prefer women having a heavy vetting process. If it's crucial, go for it all. That's what I'm saying. I'd rather only 5% of the best-looking and most selfless dudes in the world reproduce rather than morons knocking up 10 women and then having everyone else pay for the fallout.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:38 PM
–

Less than one-fifth of women 30-49 are not in a committed relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:30 PM
–

Yeah, staying single would require them to get real.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:27 PM
–

Have a very heavy vetting process. Hell, go for the top 1%. A lot of women do need to choose better, and they need to look in the mirror. When I say that, I'm not encouraging women to choose an ugly dude like myself. But maybe they should find a hot, tall, fun, intelligent, selfless, well-off guy — and if they can't find a guy like that who's willing to commit to them, then maybe it would be better to get real. But that'll never happen. Too many of them can't accept reality. They'd rather just k…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:15 PM
3

I live in a fat state as well (and in a rural area). It goes both ways: there aren't that many fit people of either sex. Several of my friends from high school married gorgeous women who can now barely fit into a truck. The dudes are now a bit chubbier too; however, they work blue-collar jobs and aren't nearly as sedentary, so they're not even close to being as big as their stay-at-home wives.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 12:48 PM
3

It just comes down to self-control and daily habits. I've lived in both places (spent two-thirds of my adult life in the southern US and one-third in Europe) and never had a problem staying fit in either part of the world. All I eat is fresh meat, eggs, dairy, and a bit of seasonal fruit — no grains (except on special occasions) or sweets. I get 90% of my food from local farmers; however, even when I got most of my food from the cheapest grocery stores, I was able to keep my body fat low and my …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 12:19 PM
1

I don't know if y'all have noticed, but feminists and women in general are much more prepared to stay single than men are. Source?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 01:42 AM
1

I don't expect love (unconditional or otherwise) from a woman who's not my mother. At best, I'm getting a very high level of respect, and it's going to be temporary and conditional. Even most attractive men experience lust, not unconditional love. That shit usually burns out too.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 02:41 PM
–

I'm sick of traveling, so B. I still want to do a lot of camping and outdoorsy stuff. However, I'd rather go to local forests and beaches.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 11:57 AM
1

I agree with 4 years for men in their 20s (or for men who either already have kids or are uninterested in having kids). My parents waited like 4 years before getting married, but they met when they were 19 and 20. I waited 4 years as well, but lockdowns prevented my wedding from happening for a year, and then we broke off the engagement. I'm in my early 30s, and I'd wait a minimum of 2 years now; anything less is way too little time to get to know someone on that level IMO. I can't believe some …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 11:54 PM
1

For sure. I have a six-pack and look skinny with clothes on, and I'm overweight according to BMI. A lot of jacked NFL players are obese according to BMI — especially those at positions like linebacker and running back, as they're usually not as tall as lineman and must be not only strong and durable but also fast and agile to excel at their positions. Even Derrick Henry, a taller running back, is obese according to BMI, and he's ripped.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 04:35 PM
–

Let's continue to make excuses for people to treat their bodies like shit — and then let's scratch our heads as to why our society is unhealthier and unhappier. somehow less deserving of love because their bodies have changed I don't think I deserve love from other people. Truth is, some people (skinny, muscular, or fat) don't deserve love from other people, and some people will never be be loved by other people. If you're significantly overweight, love yourself and treat your body well. Learn t…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 04:04 PM
17

When an unattractive woman feels like she's unattractive, she can go on a dating app or open up her social media and get an ego boost. She can then set up some dates or hook up with some guys — if she wants. When an unattractive dude thinks he's unattractive, he has two options: either he works his ass off until he receives a shred of positive attention or he stares reality in the face until he accepts it. There's never an immediate ego boost.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 12:54 PM
22

Dude, young women are rarely single. Let's not act like they've all "learned" how to stop seeking validation and/or gratification from the opposite sex. Also, the 2022 Pew survey found that half of single male respondents reported being uninterested in romantic relationships. If we take half of the 63% of young men (18-29) who are single, we're looking at almost a third of young men who aren't looking for dates or relationships whatsoever at any given time. According to that survey, only a third…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 12:35 PM
2

They don't want them. Only dudes who are desperate to get laid would take those women seriously, obviously. I think the issue is that some single men realize that their pickings are very, very slim and many of them will be SOL when it comes to finding viable mating partners, because the type of women you're describing are overrepresented in the singles dating pool. Dudes with an abundance mentality (or those who DGAF about stable relationships) won't care. They get what they want regardless.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 03:31 PM
1

Guys often complain about fat women and single moms. Women often complain about how ugly and wimpy the average guy is. That's on top of everything else you listed there.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 03:03 PM
2

I wouldn't say it's "self-imposed" if the person (male or female) isn't attracted to someone who's at an unhealthy weight. How do you force yourself to be attracted to someone you're not attracted to? And let's say you find a way to ignore the fact that you're not physically attracted to the other person — if you lead an active lifestyle and eat a clean diet, how do you live with a person who hasn't cultivated healthy habits?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 09:53 PM
1

I have no interest in being promiscuous. I don't see it as a virtue. If I'm going to get married, I want to marry someone who shares my values. If non-promiscuous women want to get with promiscuous men, that's on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 09:21 PM
11

I think that's part of his point. He seems to have accepted that part. Most ugly dudes know they're going to date ugly women unless they rake in top-tier dough and accept being walking wallets and retirement funds (which they might be for ugly women anyway). However, what he's saying wouldn't fix most problems in dating; it might make dating a bit better for some ugly dudes who are fit but aren't attracted to (or compatible with) fat women. That's about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 04:07 PM
4

In most cases, it's because they're just nice people. In rare cases, it's because they want to ask me about something or want me to do something for them. Now I'm either mean as fuck and lash out, or I act bored and monotone with them. With the former its rare, and only happens when I feel like a cat backed into a corner. That makes sense. It's funny because I do the opposite of what you do. I try to be as sweet as possible when interacting with women I don't know. I kinda have to behave that wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 04:21 AM
6

I think it's more so that women are rarely nice to most men, especially unattractive dudes. So when a woman is nice to them, it's a huge surprise. I know that if a woman who's neither a family member nor a friend is really nice to me, it's either that she's really nice to everyone or she wants something from me.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 03:53 AM
2

Let it stand as a statement. Disagree if you wish, but you won't.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 07:46 PM
2

Yes, you're my source. You're left-leaning and believe that straight men are privileged, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 06:35 PM
2

Yes, you consider yourself a leftist, no? Do you believe straight men are privileged?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 04:58 PM
2

If you answer my last question, we can use that as a source.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 04:29 PM
3

Sauce for what? So you don't think straight men are privileged?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 04:25 PM
5

As I said, they tell us that we're privileged and responsible for the ills of the world. That doesn't sound like something you say to someone you're fond of.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 04:15 PM
5

Anybody with quarter of a brain cell rolling around their skull knows why leftists are bringing this up now, and it has nothing to do with the fact that they really, really care about men either. Also, there are socialists and moderate leftists in the big, bad manosphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 04:01 PM
4

Actually, we can't see that. What we can see is that their supporters think straight men are privileged and responsible for the ills of the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 03:53 PM
4

No. Politicians still need to get elected. They'd never win an election after that. Many of their supporters would surely love it, though. People who look like me are born privileged, after all. I'm not under the illusion that politicians and bureaucrats give a damn about me. They care about watching their stock portfolios skyrocket, buying ocean-front properties, and flying around the globe in private jets while lecturing the rest of us about wealth inequality and carbon emissions.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 03:42 PM
9

Yeah, I don't want help from anyone who doesn't want to offer it out of kindness. I know most people don't really give a shit about dudes like me anyway. It's all on me to sink or swim, and that's the way I like it. Anyway, most leftists would gladly get rid of all programs directed at helping men with my superficial characteristics if that meant that women could get more programs directed at helping them. That's fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 03:24 PM
2

Kreager et. al (2014) found that less than 10% of women in the lowest quintile of desirability sent any messages to men at a similar desirability level. More than half sent messages to men in the highest quintiles. I don't think what you're describing is a male-only issue. Unattractive people aren't attracted to unattractive people, but they're very attracted to very attractive people. However, I think unattractive men are much more likely to be locked out of the dating market entirely, as women…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 02:37 PM
1

Women who are merely "a little husky" have no issues finding attractive men. Also, a person doesn't need to be on a scooter to be unhealthy. That's beyond unhealthy. At that point, a person is pretty much SOL.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 02:23 PM
1

This study found that less than 10% of the women in the lowest quintile of attractiveness sent any messages to men at the same desirability. More than half sent messages to men in the two highest quintiles. I don't think what you're describing is a male-only issue. Unattractive people are just not attracted to other unattractive people, and they're very attracted to very attractive people.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 12:20 PM
1

In my case — compatibility? I live a healthy lifestyle, and I want to be around someone who does the same, especially if we're going to live together. I want to be around someone who values their health above all else and takes care of their body. However, I want to build a family with someone like myself. If I can't have kids with a woman, I'd rather stay single. Also, I think there's a point at which it's no longer worth dating. Like if I know that I'm unattractive to the woman and she's unatt…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 12:12 PM
8

If anything, physically attractive men are probably more outgoing, fun, and interesting on average; IME they tend to get treated a lot better by strangers and women, so they're more open to doing new stuff with new people (which means they develop more robust social skills and have a warmer vibe). The real issue is that hot men are few and far between, and they aren't that crazy about most women. There are only a certain amount of hot men, and most women aren't hot enough or charming enough to s…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:17 AM
14

It's also easier to distract yourself from the truth. Even as recently as back in the 90s, if something was wrong with you or your behavior, you were forced to face that shit every day, so you had to either come to terms with your shortcomings or straighten up your act. Now you can just bury yourself in an extremely immersive and engaging but false reality — through social media, dating apps, video games, endless on-demand entertainment (binge-watching), pron, etc. — and it could be years before…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 05:09 PM
3

I just disagreed with you saying that it's normal. That's not normal in America or any other country I've been in. I don't think that you need to do all of that to be a "good" person either. You could be a moral person and still be a "good" person IMO. All of that other stuff makes you extraordinary.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 02:45 PM
2

No, they're adults. I don't blame children for being overweight because they're fed what their parents give them, and they don't control their lifestyle. Adults are responsible for their children being overweight, and they're responsible for being overweight themselves. Does this mean that this person isn't an adult if they can pay their bills? I'm saying those people aren't properly planning for the future if they're overlooking two of the most key aspects of their future. The other person desc…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 02:33 PM
3

Living paycheck to paycheck means you're not saving much for the future because you don't have much money left over to save. Does being overweight mean someone isn't taking care of themselves? Adults? 100%. Consuming more food than you need (or consuming junk food) and failing to get enough exercise increases your risk for developing chronic diseases in the future. They're neither taking care of themselves nor planning for the future.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 02:11 PM
3

Who said that? You responded to the other person who rattled off a list that includes both of those things ("plans for the future" and "takes care of himself physically"), and you responded by calling it the "baseline for a regular human being." If an adult is overweight and lives paycheck to paycheck, they need to sort out some serious shit, because they have a lot of room to improve. By your own admission, they're below the baseline.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 01:47 PM
5

In what world? The average American is fat and lives paycheck to paycheck. And that's not even considering everything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 01:29 PM
2

Confidence and aggression (paired with a certain level of looks) are attractive traits in men. They indicate a dude is willing to go out and get what they want and need. During interactions, disdain can come across as pure confidence, and many women fall for it. However, it's not hard to ooze confidence when you don't actually respect the other person.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 12:45 PM
–

I agree that casual sex isn't good for me and that people who have casual sex wouldn't be good partners for me. However, I know plenty of 304s (male and female) who are very kind people. I don't think kindness has anything to do with it. Having casual sex doesn't prevent you from being kind in any way.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 05:56 PM
0

The vast majority of women are not even close to being high-earners, and it's becoming harder and harder to live on one average salary. Therefore, that isn't really affecting relationships between men and women. IMO what's having a significant effect is the propaganda that both sides are being fed (now nonstop) paired with how easy it is to "replace" someone and experience that high of a new relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 09:54 PM
1

Those women could only get serious commitment from average or unattractive dudes, so now they pretend that they're actually turned off by men who are objectively more attractive (all other things being equal). I think that's what the other person was saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 09:15 PM
6

I've been working out since my late teens, and I'm stronger now in my early 30s than I was at the same weight at 20. But, yeah, if you eat an average diet and live an average lifestyle, your body will begin to fall apart earlier, because our culture promotes unhealthy habits. That said, most men do not peak in their 20s, because the vast majority of men are physically unattractive to begin with. They tend to become wealthier, more confident, and more masculine with age, and those are the traits …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 02:21 PM
7

I haven't had a crush since my early 20s, which is almost 10 years ago. I don't miss it, though, because I realize it's meaningless. At this point, nobody is really worth crushing on in my eyes. Meeting cool people gives me a similar rush, and cool hangs are a easier to find, though still rare IME.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 12:05 AM
0

Of course women want the richest, tallest, and strongest men. Look at the shit they read. Most just wouldn't say it in public. Honestly, I wouldn't care unless they're cheating. No, that's weird IMO. I wouldn't care. If you get fat as an adult, that's on you and you need to get your shit together ASAP. That sounds ideal. It means she's loyal (because she could easily sleep with them). I know I'm far from a male model and that most women are only genuinely attracted to the hottest dudes. Face-wis…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 08:49 PM
1

Given up how? Like you've given up on romantic relationships? IMO worrying about whether or not you're a beta is a waste of time and mental energy. Either you become a man who commands respect in his environment or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 01:38 PM
1

True. But I'm speaking for myself. The other person is speaking for every person who has "failed" in his eyes, stating that they "have to live in a constant state of grief." As long as I'm healthy and free to do what I love, I'm living a good life in my view. I can either play the cards I was dealt to the best of my ability or ruminate. One option is significantly more appealing to me than the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 10:43 PM
1

Rumination is a personal choice. Eventually, you have to try to move past it or continue to live in your own hell. It's not like "failing to fulfill your biological purpose" prevents you from making friends or living a good life.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 10:35 PM
2

I don't care about cooking, because I really enjoy cooking and don't eat a typical diet. So other than that, probably the following: Develop a warm personality Practice humility Prioritize health Kick the social media addiction Have interests outside of gossiping, makeup, and shopping
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 10:02 PM
1

While it's true that at this rate humanity will disappear, it will take centuries or even thousands of years for humans to go exctint. A few thousand years is nothing in the grand scheme of things, and my consciousness will be gone long before that. Why should it concern me? Society is mostly builded around the idea of people having kids, and it doesn't matter how undesirable you're still expected to have kids at some point. As long as you're cool to hang out with, most people don't really care …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:27 PM
0

They have to live in a constant state of grief? That's a personal choice. Humanity will cease to exist one day. Why should I care about my genetic line or biological purpose? Why agonize over something so meaningless? I know plenty of miserable, unhealthy, shackled dudes who've fulfilled their biological purpose. Am I disappointed that I never experienced mutual attraction and raised my own child? Sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 08:43 PM
1

Progressives in the media and politics rage about income inequality while flying around in private jets from one multi-million dollar mansion to another, so it's all fake to a certain extent. I'm just saying that the message (genuine or not) that mainstream conservative talking heads sell to their audience isn't one that condones male promiscuity. If the dude you responded to said that shit among average conservatives, he'd likely be challenged on his beliefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 12:27 AM
0

That person's opinion doesn't have much to do with "conservatism." They didn't even tie it together TBH. Look at all of the biggest mainstream conservative talking heads (outside of the TRP griftsphere, which we're often told represents a very small group of people), from Ben Shapiro to Tucker Carlson. None of them promote promiscuity for men; they promote marriage and family. The Bible doesn't condone promiscuity for men. The Quran doesn't condone promiscuity for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 12:02 AM
2

Those are the only women ending up with those guys. Also, if you don't at least consider a person's past before committing to them, then you're a fool (especially if you're religious). That's nobody's issue but your own.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 12:57 PM
1

I didn't specify why they prefer those dudes, and it doesn't matter. If they choose the 304, they're "pump-faking." If they were serious about their religion, they'd find a chaste man who's "physically and interpersonally sexy" or stay single.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 12:46 PM
2

The women who line up to date those dudes are "pump-faking" as well, so I don't think it's an "issue." If those women were serious about their religion, they'd just find a guy like themselves, but they prefer dudes who've been around.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 12:38 PM
2

You're beginning to realize that different men have different opinions. Even if a majority of men think one way, there could be a loud minority who disagrees. I don't find education, career, and money attractive; those things are neutral (kinda like sweetness in men), and they can become a huge negative if the woman is obsessed with money and status. However, in the current system, I think it's foolish for accomplished men to marry women with low work ethic and drive. The men who look for nothin…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/25 02:14 PM
1

IMO being bitter is foolish, period. I can recognize that when a person hurts me, it often has very little to do with me. Also, I don't expect kindness from the vast majority of people, and I don't harbor any ill will towards anyone who has ever hurt me. However, those types of women are often unattractive to certain men for a long list of reasons beyond the dude being bitter. Just because a man with a successful career doesn't want to tie himself to a "baby mama" who was "out f'n with the drug …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 06:19 PM
11

“women who are bad decision makers should feel righteous in continuing to make bad decisions” This is going to happen regardless. It's not that she's faithless; it's that he's not exciting enough (as if she didn't know that before agreeing to marry him). It's always his fault. She can do no wrong in her own eyes. Hell, she may get rewarded for being a scumbag, because that's how our society is set up.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/25 12:00 PM
11

Exactly. Compete for the best and most exciting dudes. Be honest with men and yourself. The problem is that most of them want their servant/retirement fund, and they want validation. They're willing to lie to the man and to themselves to get it, as the best dudes don't want most of them for serious relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/25 11:46 AM
1

Yeah, and the average woman would likely call Pascal "average" and Cavill "fit." For most men, though, Cavill's physique is unattainable without help from substances (and a very high-calorie diet paired with a grueling workout routine).
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/25 03:03 PM
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No doubt there. There's a lot of hypocrisy and virtue signaling going on. IME women prefer a lot more muscle than they often like to admit in public. I would never bother getting fit for a woman. Their idea of a "fit" man is typically a roided athlete, and maintaining that amount of muscle mass isn't healthy in the long term (and isn't realistic for most men). I stay active and eat a clean diet because I want to enjoy my life for a long time. I don't want to be with a woman who doesn't value her…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 08:06 PM
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I get the frustration. Many women nowadays do seem to downplay the amount of effort it takes (especially odd considering that many of them put in little to no effort themselves). And the other guys you mentioned do work hard. However, there's no need to spend hours in the gym every week to achieve that level of fitness. I maintained a six pack with v-taper in my 30s by working out for less than 60 minutes (four 15-minute or less workouts) per week at my home gym (i.e., just a power tower and a m…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 07:53 PM
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The popularity of the premise is the most important thing to note IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 07:12 PM
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So? Both of those franchises were just giving the market what it wanted. If women didn't gobble up those books and movies, none of them would've been such massive hits. Also, how the did 50 Shades mess up dating when the vast majority of men aren't trying to be like Christian Grey? Again, what you refer to as "a very poorly researched idea of BDSM relationships" seems to be what appeals to the most women. What actually changed dating was technology, not some shitty author who gave women what the…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 05:16 PM
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Huh? It's not like the average dude is some Andrew Tate clone now. Yet the average dude gets an occasional GF (who's not exactly crazy about him) every once in a while. 365 Days broke Netflix records in 2020, and that's much trashier than Twilight IMO. Clearly, a good chunk of women (if not the vast majority) fantasize about taming the hulking, ruthless, wealthy "bad boy" who thinks one woman is super duper special. For whatever reason, what really, really seems to appeal to the female market is…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 04:59 PM
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No. I wouldn't want to be with most women, because most women would use me. There are very few women I would want to be with, and I'd say the same about men if I were a woman. I was just pointing out the ridiculousness of what you said. Again, if he's small, I don't know what the average dude is. And if he's gross, I don't know how gross the average dude is. Andrew Tate has a wiry frame with a lot of muscle and a low body fat percentage. I have a wiry frame with a lot of muscle and a low body fa…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 03:38 PM
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Andrew Tate probably has more baby mamas right now than the average guy will ever have GFs. He's also 6'3" with the build of an athlete, so if he's "small looking," I don't know what the vast majority of dudes are. Is he someone to admire? Not in my opinion, but I know that average men, including myself, are infinitely "grosser" in the eyes of most women.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 03:23 PM
2

Even in my generation I’ve seen a shift to more asocial behavior even with those who were highly social in their younger years. Very true. I've even seen this in Gen Xers and Boomers. I've seen it in myself, a Millennial born in the early 90s. I used to be extremely social when I was younger, and now I can't wait to save enough money and bounce to the boonies.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 12:34 PM
1

I’d really have to desire someone in order for me to have someone “intrude” in my daily life—is the guy worth me sacrificing... You nailed it here. A lot of guys feel the same way. Just the thought of all the responsibility that comes with being in a relationship makes me not want to be in a relationship again. And a relationship seems completely pointless if the woman doesn't take care of herself or I have to deal with another man and his kids, both of which apply to the vast majority of single…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:38 AM
17

No. I'm not really interested in casual relationships, but I prefer seeing women for what they are. I prefer it all being out in the open, with women being as loud as possible about how they really feel. It's a bit easier to spot the duds. I wouldn't be able to go back anyway. I can't view relationships that way anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 12:34 PM
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It's not that men don't like older women; it's that in many cases (not all), older women don't have anything to offer men in marriage or serious LTRs. The same can be said for women and how they view broke dudes. Also, older men are less likely to be desperate and naive (and more likely to have a money and masculine traits), so their standards tend to be higher. That said, 30 is still young. IMO the average woman will always be able to find a line of suckers. But the more time that passes, the l…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/25 01:23 PM
8

Most can't. They'll find a woman who accepts them, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 07:31 PM
3

This is Reddit, so that's a given. She's at least willing to be civil during our interactions. Most women are here to ragebait, concern troll, and bully "loser" men (in the most cowardly way possible). I don't expect anything more.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 04:52 PM
3

Can you please rephrase it, because I don't understand what you meant to type here: "you think women think are lust isn't shallow." Right now, the biggest issue is that I don't know what you're accusing me of thinking TBH. I already mentioned what I think in my exchange with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 04:39 PM
3

I don’t think men are shallow for having triggers for carnal attraction. I don’t think women are either. I don't think that either, so what are we talking about? I'm trying to understand specifically what you disagree with me on and why. If there's nothing to discuss, then why not move on instead of lobbing "insecure" or "defensive" at me in every comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 04:22 PM
11

Part of the reason I come here is for the absurdity. There's a complete lack of self-awareness. "Looks ain't everything." Then they proceed to post pics of Hollywood lead men (average in their eyes) and roided studs. Hilarious.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 03:44 PM
3

In your last comment, you said you don't agree with my concept of shallow. Could you explain why? Half of your first comment is you accusing me of responding to you and pointing out the OP when this is clearly the off-topic section and I wasn't responding to your OP. The other person is fine with saying that men are more shallow. I'm trying to figure out why.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 03:36 PM
3

Ok, what do you disagree with?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 03:07 PM
4

I wasn't responding to your OP, though. With all due respect, this the off-topic section, no? I was responding to the person above me. I actually agree with most of the OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 02:47 PM
3

So does that mean you think most of them are shallow? I think most women are shallow due to their obsession with status (mostly $$$). They'll often settle for the guy with the best job title or the most potential to rake in dough, even if they don't love the guy. I think most men are shallow due to their obsession with sexual gratification. They'll often settle for the most attractive woman who puts out, even if they don't love the woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 02:42 PM
2

I'm not arguing that, though. And you said that it was partly about wanting to be seen with them, which I don't think is the case. I agree about sexual compatibility. I think it's part of what makes people a good match. Do you think that most men are shallow?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 02:19 PM
2

I don't think it's reserved for those situations. Let's say I'm with a woman mostly because I think she's physically attractive — am I not being shallow? Let's say she's not a trophy wife — only mildly attractive — but that's the best I can do, as my options are limited. IME that's pretty common. I also think it's common for women to marry meh guys who have a stable job. IMO a good chunk of men (nowadays) don't evoke a lot of sexual attraction, and a good chunk of women (nowadays) don't evoke a …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 01:53 PM
5

Most women are shallow, though. Most men are too. We don't need to pretend. And for some men, especially some of those who end up posting here, success in dating is off the table. At best, they're going to end up essentially paying for a wife. Hating other people (many of whom never did anything to you) is absolutely pointless, so I'm not even going to bother trying to defend that.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 01:32 PM
15

I think it depends on the man. I want to bag a natural, sweet woman who I find attractive (and who shares my values). I don't give a shit if other men find her attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 01:20 PM
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