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View 1 posts and 386 comments by EaglePill on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

DiscussionEaglePill/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 12:00 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Everything you mentioned is suffering, like fear and ignorance. And dealing with suffering already requires effort. Not starving kids in Africa level suffering, but then most things in life aren't either if you live in the first world. But you can't always point to starving African kids to dismiss people's problems, including people you assume are unsuccessful in dating because they're "entitled" or "impatient" or "lazy." Sometimes they're just unlucky. Like any interaction involving the consent…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/22 09:11 PM
1

Because human beings dislike suffering? And we should wish for others to suffer less? That's a very philosophical question. Hypothetically if we had the technology to simplify a wildly complex and painful selection process without error then it would feel wrong not to allow people to use it. Same thing applies to relationships. Sure you could say that going through toxic relationships and bad breakups is a rite of passage and a necessary learning experience, but sometimes there's no meaning in b…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/22 08:42 PM
1

Wishing something were easier doesn't mean you don't understand why it's difficult, it's human to be frustrated. Also if you're carrying a camera around and filming then that's going to artificially inflate your success rate, like proposing to a woman in public. You're gonna get some "courtesy" answers.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/22 08:18 PM
1

So voting for them is essentially voting for the person FARTHEST from your own position. Not necessarily, you might agree with the position of one party or another on core issues you care about in a piecemeal fashion, in which case a 3rd party might just share ALL those positions in one convenient package. But the third party candidate will NEVER win. Maybe so but a notable third party could split the vote and force a defeated major party to change and reconsider their strategy from the outside.…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 10:53 PM
2

But the point is that the third party candidate is the closest to their own positions. The fact that their free vote for a 3rd party could "hurt" the major party candidate is no one's fault but the major party's, and saying people should be satisfied with "good enough" is pretty duopolistic and, frankly, undemocratic.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 07:06 PM
2

Talking about your experiences with men is fine as long as you don't try to draw sweeping conclusions from them. But we don't know if that's the case here. And "the data" here is anecdotal, so there's nothing to negate unless again they're trying to make a sweeping claim. Broad generalizations about groups of people aren't great, whether they're about gender or race. But there seems to be some cognitive dissonance on his part. The problem is he doesn't really stress test his theory against the i…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 06:43 AM
2

Lol sorry for rounding up, if it matters I don't think 30 is that old...he's got his whole life ahead of him!
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 05:45 AM
2

Your partner must be very attractive or confident for women to be that forward lol Then again if you asked some of the folks here at PPD they'd claim there's no way this story isn't fictional, because apparently it's literally physiologically impossible for a 20 year old woman to be attracted to a 30 year old man...
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 05:31 AM
14

This is a very relevant example for bringing up in response the fact that the men complaining about and the men going for Kardashian-looking women are usually not the same men. Simply because people have very different subjective standards of beauty.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 12:45 AM
6

I don't think befriending people because you want to learn more about them is necessarily wrong. As long as you care about them as people and not just the information. Give and take. In terms of exposure it's hard to spend a lot of time around someone naturally and freely without them being your friend. You're not going to learn a lot beyond superficial things just from socializing with coworkers or acquaintances, simply because there's a lot of honest conversations you're not even going to have…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/22 09:07 PM
4

So then how else would you suggest a guy learn about and get comfortable around a group of people without interacting with them? There's no better solution than constant exposure. The point of hanging out with people who are different than you (eg college campus diversity) is that spending more time around those people exposes you to their ways of thinking and their experiences that you can't get from reading a book or following online advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/22 08:45 PM
13

Straying is more about opportunity than knowledge, especially for women because they don't tend to initiate. But yeah hopefully this doesn't change your marital dynamic.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/22 08:31 PM
1

Depends on the instrument lol
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/22 04:46 AM
4

It's healthy to keep in mind that the internet isn't always real life, but it does bring up a point worth pondering: at what point does it become useful to worry that a social media platform with 50 million daily users and growing might accurately represent a big enough percentage of real world opinions? People do in fact take a lot of influence from what they consume in the media and the internet.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 10:24 PM
0

I swear, if one of them calls me an ageist for throwing the "he's young enough to be her grandson" line back at them...
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 09:41 PM
11

Both men want something from me while I’m minding my business. Huh? If you're approaching the "shy" guy first then by definition you want him to mind your business because you're interested in him. I don't get what you're trying to say. I’m not going to start hitting on dudes, nor should any woman really, it puts her in extreme risk of being ‘passed around’ and used as she will be seen as an easy target. This is a stereotype based on the assumption that men in real life actually care about "n-co…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 08:58 PM
21

It's not like letting the man make the first move would avoid that problem. A guy who is intent on pumping and dumping is more likely going to be proactive about scoping out victims, not waiting passively for the right girl to come along. A phone scammer doesn't wait for people to call them first, the directionality doesn't make much sense here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 07:28 PM
1

"How to make big hole feel like small hole," apparently
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 07:16 PM
1

Whatever you think the age of real adulthood should be you better be consistent about it. If 18 year olds are dumb children compared to you at your "wise age" so you can win an argument then that means they're off-limits dating wise. OTOH if you think it's sexist for men to call them girls and not women then you can't turn around and call them girls yourself to "protect" them from older men and age gaps.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 06:35 AM
1

Holy shit I was not expecting that caption
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 02:58 AM
1

Yeah that's a thing too, often one of the siblings will live with their parents or buy a house near their parent's house to check on them. Then again they also benefit from that arrangement in the form of a trusted babysitter for their own kids (which the new grandparents will happily oblige).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 02:57 AM
1

Yeah ok, I guess I must not want equality for women because I don't agree with your personal definition of equality. Real galaxy brain argument...
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 11:21 PM
1

It's literally not. Equality is relevant to people who are currently alive, not to people who died hundreds of years ago. Otherwise you could claim white people need (present tense) affirmative action more than Native Americans do, because they were vastly outnumbered minorities in the 1600s when the first settlers arrived.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 11:11 PM
3

For women to be equal, it would have to be only women in academia for the next couple thousand years. That's not equality, that's retribution. Things don't move that slowly in 2022. And if you're going to measure "equality" by statistics, most statistics show there are already more women in college than men. If you're talking about specific fields like science and engineering you may never get gender parity any more than you'll get 50% male nurses and teachers. Unless you eliminate entrance requ…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 10:41 PM
2

It's a cultural thing too, a lot of immigrant families are big on taking care of elders. The idea is giving back to the people who raised you and provided a support system for you to thrive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 10:30 PM
7

Maybe they're in the process of getting fit, but you're just seeing a snapshot in time. You can work on yourself and put yourself out there at the same time, no need to spin your wheels.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 10:12 PM
-2

They shouldn't be, but I think OP's comparison with men's age preferences was to point out that men are often shamed on OLD by women who wouldn't swipe left on them anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 10:10 PM
1

Andrew Tate has entered the chat
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 10:05 PM
1

he's the actor who played Superman and is apparently a gaming nerd
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 10:01 PM
1

So I take it you're not into Henry Cavill then?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 09:42 PM
1

Yes you should stick to the proper topic of conversation, with the caveat that offensive stereotypes and bigotry against people are a thing. When you're talking about a group of people (and not governments or inanimate objects) categorized by their immutable characteristics and the problem isn't unique to that group in theory, then it's fine to question why there's a specific focus on that group instead of people in general. Since often the factors leading to someone being a victimizer might hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 09:33 PM
1

Yeah, generalizing a group of people is a separate issue that also needs to be called out. But it still makes strategic sense to answer the question if it's worded respectfully and actually true. Person A: "men do x" Person B: "Really? All men?" Person A: "Fine, why do so many guys IME do x?" Person B: "Well, it's human nature you see. <explains> A lot of women also do x." Person A: "WHATABOUTIS- oh wait, yeah you have a point."
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 09:03 PM
3

You can avoid accusations of whataboutism if you acknowledge the person's point and admit fault before bringing up the "what about..." That indicates that you're at least arguing in good faith and not just trying to deflect the conversation or avoid being called out on a double standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 08:34 PM
1

It's certainly possible to talk to women as people even with intent lol A warm approach at a party or an introduction by a "matchmaking" mutual friend in school would involve intent as well, but I'm sure you'd agree that it's possible to talk to women in those situations as people. Despite those interactions being arranged or contrived in a way that's not totally organic or by chance.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 08:25 PM
1

Ideally the conversation for both of those situations should start out looking similar, small talk is small talk. So you're practicing the same skill, just a different term I guess. But I wouldn't consider it a warm approach either since you don't know the person. In terms of intention and headspace the guy doesn't necessarily have to go in thinking "I wanna get her number," that's going to be conditional on how well the conversation goes.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 07:58 PM
2

Once in a while it happens, you might hit on a mutually shared interest or something and genuinely connect. But nothing you do in dating or making friends or anything social gives 100% success rate anyways. The point is learning how to make small talk without worrying about the results or catastrophizing rejection, socializing is about practice after all.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 07:42 PM
1

Cold approaching doesn't necessarily mean you literally just see a woman and ask for her number immediately, PUA style. You can make small talk based on shared environmental cues like you would with a male stranger, and if the conversation goes well then you ask for her number when you leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 07:34 PM
1

2 girls 1 guy threesome isn't sensible because I only have one dick. This might help
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 06:45 PM
1

So instead of having a child and helping to raise a child in next generation, all you care about is your own feeling? I'd be careful, this "stable society"/"putting the greater good over your own wants" argument is the same argument people use to shame childfree women into having babies for the sake of reversing a declining birth rate and sustaining a dynamic economy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 06:36 PM
2

Yeah it's definitely a balancing act. It's nice to tell yourself you're lucky for that momentary relief, but only so you can get back on the horse easier. The danger is letting the "comfort" of comparing yourself to people less fortunate than you turn into apathy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 01:46 AM
3

Thing is that when you live in the first world you're judged by first world standards, so a guy with first world problems is still seen by his peers as...a guy with problems. Otherwise from a totally asocial context yeah of course having access to clean drinking water is pretty nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 01:37 AM
5

Only if he genuinely likes her. If he's only "accepting" it because it's the better of two options then that sucks for the both of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/22 09:44 PM
1

That's an interesting point but I'd say it applies closer to "above average" range than straight up hot guys. Shy 7s are a relatively untapped market (heh) because they're in that gray zone where they have decent looks but lack the positive reinforcement of female attention and confidence-building towards their looks because of their shyness.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/22 09:19 PM
1

Ok got it, your wording was very indirect so I wasn't sure if you had conceded the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 11:59 PM
1

Again, you're still tap dancing around the original point about the hypocrisy in the specific language used from both sides to describe said lack of attraction. Saying you're "not attracted" is not what's controversial here and I'm sure you realize that. Do you think it's okay for early 20s men to say that women are "old" or "hit the wall" by 30? Do you think it's okay for early 20s women to say that men are "old and gross" at 30?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 11:54 PM
1

You didn't address my point, there's a difference between "not being attracted" and saying the things I mentioned.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 11:34 PM
1

So if you think it's fine for young women to actually verbally call out 30 year old guys for being old, then that means you would also agree that it's okay for men to talk about women "hitting the wall at 25" and promoting that kind of discourse. And side with the men when they get pushback from insulted women, since their disgust of "old women" is understandable in your words.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 11:19 PM
1

Someone much younger than you calling you old is understandable. Keep in mind many of the men that 30 year old women are getting mad at for calling them "old" are young redpill types in their early 20s who think women hit the wall at 25. Would you still stand by your statement that their description is "understandable"?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 11:09 PM
4

Lol there's no way you've spent time on PPD and actually believe that no one here thinks 30 with someone 20 is gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 11:06 PM
6

I'd say that having dating experience during those years is important for socialization and personal growth, but on the other hand depending on what industry you want to get into your grades and accomplishments during those years are even more important, especially if your major is very intensive and time-consuming. Putting aside the people who are okay with balancing work and relationships and getting average results in both, if you had to prioritize one I would say prioritize schoolwork absolu…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 09:02 PM
2

It sounds like you're lumping together different definitions of sexual fulfillment: immediate fulfillment vs. the kind of long-term fulfillment (relevant to your post) that would keep someone happy in a monogamous relationship. If having an orgasm every time meant actual long-term sexual fulfillment for a man then in theory they would be fine being with only one woman for their entire life in the first place. But obviously people get acclimated to nice things and desire variety after a while. So…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 08:13 PM
2

Would you like some more whine to wash down those sour grapes
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 12:19 AM
1

Sure, but they can help not announcing their opinions when it doesn't concern them or projecting them onto couples they don't know. Thoughts and opinions are involuntary but no one needs to know that you think short guys or single mothers or gay people are gross, it doesn't really contribute to the conversation or prove anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 08:07 PM
2

Yeah I'm kinda annoyed at myself for not being able to walk away from this topic, partly because it's so interesting to see how some otherwise smart and open-minded people are so unwilling to think critically instead of emotionally in arguing against it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 02:05 AM
2

In principle it makes sense why race-based affirmative action would be more controversial than legacy admissions, because the idea of benefiting from knowing the right people in your network (in getting a job, for example) isn't foreign or particularly objectionable to most people. And the idea of a child benefiting from the merit of a parent or relative isn't nearly as controversial either, at least outside of academia.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 01:59 AM
1

And men can chose to be attracted to whomever they want This is absolutely untrue and the opposite of what I said, otherwise gay men could choose not to be gay. But they can't, and women can't force themselves to like short guys, and men can't force themselves to like older women. And for the record I don't shame women for dating taller men, nor do I support shaming men for dating younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 01:49 AM
1

I mean my original comment you replied to already specified "large age gaps" to begin with. And usually saying you're "against age gaps" without qualification reasonably means you're against a 30 year old dating an 18 year old, for instance. But point taken, I'll be more specific in double-checking what you mean next time. Going back to my question, if you agree that a 30 year old dating a 15 year old is so wrong that it makes sense why it's illegal, then a 30 year old dating an 18-22 year old s…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 01:44 AM
1

you haven't yet addressed why my earlier answer wasn't good enough. Because believing that proven cheaters are always wrong isn't analogous to assuming a particular age gap is always wrong. In the latter case you're dealing with less certainty. On the other hand you're also dealing with a vulnerable group that you'd ostensibly want society to protect from exploitation. Not so with cheating. And since your moral opposition to age gaps is very absolute by your own admission ("I do not approve one …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 01:24 AM
1

I'm not asking a trick question or anything. Most people agree dating minors is immoral. Therefore they support criminalizing an adult dating a minor. Some people also agree dating young adults is immoral. So why wouldn't these people support criminalizing the same adult dating a young adult, if the only difference in those two scenarios is the younger person being older by 1 or 2 years?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 12:57 AM
1

So then what substantive difference is there in you supporting criminalization of an age gap involving a minor one year younger than the age of majority, vs not wanting to criminalize a legal age gap where the younger person is exactly the age of majority? If it's simply the legality that makes it government overreach in your mind then it seems like you're operating on a "legal = not my business" rationale. That's fine. Just saying that someone who sincerely thought age gaps were more exploitati…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 12:52 AM
0

If you believe something is immoral and involves a group of vulnerable people you think society should protect then you would support the idea of making it illegal. For people who think age gaps involving 18-24 year olds are only a small step above predation of minors then they would absolutely support its criminalization.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 12:26 AM
1

people don't chose to be gay or straight, men chose to date younger women. Men can't choose whether they're attracted to younger women or not, just like gay people can't choose whether they're attracted to the same sex. Just like women can't choose whether they're attracted to taller men or not. Saying they have a "choice" to 1) only date people that you think they're "supposed" to or 2) just not date at all is not much of a choice, because attraction is involuntary.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 12:20 AM
0

If that were the prevailing opinion then I would agree with you, but most of the criticism I see is from people who are never that patient in waiting for relevant details to judge each case on its own merits. Instead they will either assume it's bad right off the bat, or use their personal experience of being harmed by an older partner to project a universal conclusion that's age gaps are always bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 12:14 AM
1

Why would a man not want a woman dating an older man if he wants what's best for her? Wants what's best for her, not knows what's best for her. Because what the parent thinks is best for their child might not align with what is actually right or wrong, hence my example of the racist father. A lot of men are already uneasy about their daughters' same-age prom dates and boyfriends, doesn't mean their uneasiness proves that dating people your age is wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 12:09 AM
1

You don't need to consult the internet for relationship when its going well. Kind of? Not always though. People consult the internet when they're simply unsure and asking for second opinions on which way to choose, not necessarily because they hit rock bottom. ("Should I continue seeing this person who's been great so far except that there's this age gap between us...?) For context they describe their interactions with a different-aged person that up to that point have been neutral or positive.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 06:58 PM
1

It's a good starting point for winning someone over to your side, but not for discussing the merits of the actual issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 06:56 PM
4

Dating advice sub content is dictated by what type of relationships are currently sucking Not from what I've seen, there are plenty of posts where OP describes a larger age gap relationship that is neutral or even positive and generally asking for advice, but people still assume the worst. As well as assuming that OP can't possibly be a trustworthy narrator if they depict their age gap as anything other than terrifying and manipulative. By contrast, if OP casually mentioned her boyfriend's bar h…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 06:40 PM
4

There's plenty of people who think they are harmful and immoral, even just on this sub. What's concerning to me is that, if someone DOESN'T think they're harmful and immoral then what reason do they even have to mention they're creepy and gross? If one's subjective feelings are their only argument then they're working with about as much substance as a homophobe saying gay couples are gross. Might as well just keep it to themselves, and certainly don't volunteer their opinions as literal dating a…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 06:30 PM
-1

So following that to its logical conclusion, that must mean heterosexual relationships between same-aged men and women must also be creepy and wrong then /s
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 06:23 PM
2

Sure, but the "would you let your daughter" scenario is overwhelmingly weaponized as an argument for why there IS something wrong with age gaps. Rarely does the person proposing the scenario as a gotcha or anyone agreeing with its "conclusion" ever admit that its logic doesn't go far enough beyond pointing out hypocrisy...to actually prove they're right on the issue itself. In the context of this post OP mentions that the hypothetical is used precisely as an ad hominem to deflect from the truth …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 06:22 PM
4

If people truly thought age gaps were no more harmful than any of those things you mentioned, you'd expect to see a similar quantity of posts on dating subs telling young women not to date guys who drink or gamble with equal ferocity.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 05:41 PM
1

Also don't forget the "inherently" part, as in you would believe there's no "within reason" to justify nuance on the issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 05:35 PM
-3

harmful and immoral I made a point of being very deliberate in my choice of words If you thought a phenomenon posed an inherently fundamental obstacle to the safety and protection of young people, then wouldn't you be complicit in not at least silently supporting the idea of its criminalization?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 05:31 PM
-2

Like I said, those specific dads are hypocritical in the sense that they imagine other men to have bad intentions doing things they "know" themselves to have done with good intentions. It's the same as them hooking up with same-age women (other men's daughters) when they were young, vs. being super suspicious when young men the same age as their daughters date them. Obviously that suspicion doesn't mean hooking up with someone your age is wrong, nor by extension does it mean their bias can be ta…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 05:28 PM
-1

2) Very few people want government intervention to stop age gap relationships. This is the million dollar question that makes no sense to me and that I've never seen opponents of age gaps answer. If you truly believed that certain large age gaps were inherently harmful and immoral—such that a blanket ban would prevent enough harm for us to not care about protecting or acknowledging the exceptions—why on Earth wouldn't you wish for them to be illegal?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 05:22 PM
-1

Fully valid question. Basically every man is against age gaps when it's a woman he cares about. Very telling. That's a useless question that merely shows parental/ideological bias and hypocrisy when it comes to fathers being overprotective of their daughters. It's like asking a racist white guy if he's okay with his daughter dating a black man. "Hell no!" And then taking his answer as some sort of proof that parents know best with regard to the morality of interracial relationships (being someho…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 05:07 PM
1

I guess awkwardness is harder to define because like you implied there's more variables involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 02:31 AM
1

Conversely men who do train, and dress well, are often received more positively. Yeah I kind of agree, there's more leeway at least. I've noticed there's a tendency to associate someone who's physically fit with a kind of DGAF attitude that's incompatible with neuroticism. Even if they are awkward others might not label it that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 02:29 AM
1

For instance you might be discussing a topic that one person in the group is a recognized subject matter expert in. That suggests someone can be situationally awkward during a part of the conversation they know nothing about, but then be a "leader" (term loosely applied) when the topic shifts to something they have expertise in. But yeah I'd say the "leader" designation is usually based on a more permanent quality like your overall popularity or looks or sense of humor. I doubt having sporadic "…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 02:26 AM
1

Most of the time they actually do not have a formed opinion at all so it's not a case of it being changed one way or the other but decided for them. So the conversational leaders are also the thought leaders, you could say? That's something I would agree with if we're talking about adolescents or high schoolers. With adults I think there's a bit more independence but your point is still very thought-provoking.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 01:54 AM
1

Some of them maybe, but you'd figure that the ones who are self-aware are going to see it in others. They might even be more likely to react negatively because it reminds them of themselves. By the same token you wouldn't expect an unattractive person to somehow be unable to recognize when another person is unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 01:48 AM
1

social pressure overrides cuteness for a lot of people Yeah, unless you're talking about them finding the person cute and not just what they said. In that case I feel like it could go either way, unless the person judging was confident that they could easily meet and get along with other attractive people who weren't also awkward.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 12:48 AM
1

That makes sense, but do you think it's more relative than something like looks and humor, or more clearly agreed upon?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 12:22 AM
1

But in a group setting, Woman B might perceive him as more awkward due to social pressure. That's interesting and I've noticed that as well. When there's other people besides you in a group and you're reacting to a weird comment or a joke that fell flat, there's a temptation to look at each other and give each other that "awkwaaard!" look of recognition. But I still wonder in that case whether woman B already found it awkward and was just looking for confirmation, or if her mind was actively cha…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/22 12:21 AM
17

They're not exactly the same but awkwardness is a sub-category of sorts. Being socially awkward in a group typically means you could benefit from some help from a friendly person in that situation to defuse the awkwardness. A lot of men like the idea of rescuing a woman from a tough situation, not just tangible things like fixing their car or fighting off a mugger but in terms of social comfort and situational awareness as well. Like accompanying her to a large party where she doesn't know anyon…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 10:11 PM
4

Awkwardness isn't always through obvious body language or tone markers though, it could just be the content or appropriateness of the words you're saying in a confident tone. And different people might have different boundaries on what's acceptable and what they would or would not be embarrassed to say in a certain situation. Hence when someone says "I was so awkward in this situation" that could just be in their head and their friend might reply with "You're overthinking things, it wasn't that …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 10:06 PM
2

OK, so if being funny is relative wouldn't that also mean being socially awkward is relative?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 09:57 PM
12

Oh OK so you're not literally an incel, guess I misunderstood that part. But yeah it is an obstacle to dating, although I expected minimal or even just less relationship experience in your case instead of none at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 09:33 PM
10

Do you meet and interact with women in daily life on a regular basis? How about environments like bars and hookup apps where being hot goes a long way? One would expect that if you're a hot guy then statistically at least some small percentage of women who overvalue looks would be into your looks long enough for something to happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 09:27 PM
2

Guys can't afford to be "socially awkward" or unfunny That's an interesting point I'd push back on, the average guy is able to date and get married but I wouldn't consider the average guy to be "funny."
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 09:18 PM
25

It's also less detrimental for women because shyness and awkwardness is already a stereotypically more acceptable trait for a woman to have in the first place. "Damsel in distress" is not a role that guys can attach themselves to successfully.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 09:14 PM
27

It's not the worst but it's up there if it's debilitating. Being boring and ugly are equally detrimental. I'm still on the fence as to whether a hot guy with bad social anxiety comes out net attractive or net repulsive, seems like it could go either way but there's not a lot of visible examples to point to.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 09:11 PM
2

Twenty-year-old women tend to find the idea of dating men that age gross I'm know you've been on PPD long enough to know you're not getting away with using just your anecdotal experience without providing actual evidence. And long enough to have told others the same thing. those old men Not sure if you noticed, but the way you talk about 28 year old men sounds a lot like the way incels talk about 25 year old women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 05:43 PM
1

If they're overweight but hot facially then I'd be cool looks-wise, but it would depend on what other personality traits we're talking about. Trustworthiness and laziness is something that they better fix quickly because that shit affects your quality of life every single day.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 05:41 PM
1

Depends on how close they initially are to meeting the initial qualifications. And how long of a time frame we're talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 05:17 PM
-1

B) Man hit the Wall too, currently even worse than women due to the lack of self-care, C) Ain't no 20-year-olds waiting for your 40-year-old ass, D) Believing in the Wall for women is a c0p3 and just a revenge fantasy. Many women are absolute milfs at 40 Unless this is a multiple choice question these points are completely mutually contradictory
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 05:12 PM
2

If she has a boyfriend, then she doesn't have it that bad. As long as they don't have "never leave the house" levels of social anxiety then it usually doesn't affect women's dating prospects nearly as much as it does a man's.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/22 12:53 AM
1

Not inherently no, it depends on the group dynamics. But usually if it's multiple people then it can start to look suspicious. Some women might feel expendable or feel like second choice. Personally I think there's just way too much risk and drama involved with dating/sleeping with people in your social circle and no easy way to leave. Better to not shit where you eat.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 10:41 PM
1

Yeah but I'm pretty sure you unknowingly encounter way more than 36 red pillers in your lifetime
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 06:08 PM
1

If the whole idea is to point out that some kind of unsolicited criticism or judgment seems unreasonable then what else can you do but bring it up and complain about it? Not talk about it on a discussion forum? Again the litmus test should be that as long as you don't complain about how you think oranges are gross, then it's fine to complain about being morally castigated for preferring apples.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 05:50 PM
1

No one cares as long as you aren’t complaining. This isn't true no matter how many times people claim it. People judge. Even when the person being judged expresses their preferences in positive terms, and not framed as insults toward the groups they DON'T prefer. From what I've seen the visible majority of PPD is guilty of caring about other people's standards that they don't agree with in some way or another. And I can think of maybe a handful of people in this sub who have demonstrated consist…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 05:38 PM
–

Lol you better hope there's a difference, imagine living somewhere with a million serial killers walking around. It'd be a coin flip walking out your front door every morning.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 05:19 PM
–

*goobernatorial
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 01:14 AM
–

I feel like it'd be way creepier without the emoji Dolphin_Moon you are cute as fuck. ​ ...
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/22 01:07 AM
1

Did you see what he said to the Riverdale girl "I rejected you because we have kind of a bromance backstage, I did it for the boyz" Bruh what in the tarnation...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/22 04:39 PM
3

Right you can become a top tier man eventually, I'm saying you shouldn't literally wait until you reach that status to start dating in the first place. You can do those things concurrently. Overthinking and waiting for things to be "perfect" before you take the first step and risk failure is what causes inaction in dating and in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/22 04:21 PM
-1

Mathematically you have a small chance of succeeding, but the benefit is that it's low-risk for both parties and less time investment.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/22 04:18 PM
9

Lol @ "start a business" The prerequisite to getting a date shouldn't require a 10-year plan. 20 year old guys with college loans are asking how to up their game, maybe work out a bit, and develop a short-term strategy by next year. Not wait until they're a successful business owner pushing 30 or good enough to make the NBA. The advice should look more like technical skills you can work on: how to talk to women, how to present yourself well and highlight your strengths, how to take rejection, et…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/22 04:11 PM
0

No one who understands what "predatory" means actually thinks the word was invented to describe a phenomenon that doesn't exist, it's more that many people do see (and most people should in principle see) a problem with labelling every such man who fits the physical description as potentially predatory. Looking at the picture, you could equally say with a bit more certainty that he's just bad at taking hints, or has an inflated sense of his looks, or is an awkward "gentleman," etc. Besides, only…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/22 03:47 PM
1

Doesn't matter how good or bad his justification might be, that's his problem. The point is that you have no way of knowing which one it is when making the generalization. You can only be right by accident after the fact, so morally the onus is still on you not to generalize in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 07:48 PM
1

Even if that were overwhelmingly true, men overestimating their own level of attractiveness is only one half of the equation. They would also have to underestimate women's level of attractiveness to totally misjudge their "league." Specifically the women that they're interested in dating. This isn't talked about as much, but you could argue that makeup can make some women appear up to 1 or 2 "points" more attractive than they actually are and convince interested men into wrongly thinking their c…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 05:00 PM
2

Exactly, generalizations are applied selectively. Good thing you brought up age gaps, because don't forget the people who oppose them also love to make moral generalizations about older men who date younger women. In that case, the "concern for numbers" is totally nonexistent seeing how said people will resort to anecdata, cultural stereotypes, and "it's wrong because I think it's gross" logic in place of actual evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 04:29 PM
5

Most men will use you for sex if you put yourself out there to be used. The kind of guy to use you for sex is more likely going to be proactive and approach you first, rather than wait around passively. That's like thinking a phone scammer or a telemarketer waits around for their targets to call THEM so they can finally cheat them out of their money. That would be a terrible and inefficient sales strategy lol
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 04:16 PM
4

Those sound like different men with different levels of confidence. Also I can see how men might incur a bigger penalty for approaching a woman and being viewed as a creep, societally. For women it's generally more acceptable to enter a guy's space and ask him out without arousing suspicion. Individually though it comes down to your personality and how resilient you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 04:03 PM
2

Maybe I'm wrong in assuming people get more tired as they age No, that's an understandable assumption. Just not to the degree that people who oppose age gaps will often exaggerate it in order to make the logical leap about how they're morally wrong. I think age gaps matter the least 25-50 but they do tend to have a more notable impact in the very early ages and older ages. Potentially losing a partner to death sooner because they're several years older is something worth examining. Yeah it's one…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 12:15 AM
1

I do believe that the "gross" factor for both come from the distaste of mortality many people have, and that many prefer healthier bodies, which are often younger. Sure. Though a lot of judgment about older people is largely based on more superficial things like looks and societal stereotypes (men get more manipulative and pervy, women become less agreeable and valuable). I doubt most young guys actually ruminate about something like fertility when they meet a fun, attractive woman but then find…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 10:52 PM
1

There variance is intense sometimes. Lol that variance is what makes all the confident generalizations really annoying. And factually incorrect. Both when women do it to complain about "gross older guys" hitting on them and when men do it to gloat about "post-wall uglies." I know there's a temptation for people to think of themselves as an outlier, but talking about general trends seems pointless for those with actual life experience as the outliers and even more so when the sweeping conclusions…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 08:00 PM
1

I'm Gen Z. I do think older guy who are exclusively looking for young or barely legal women often err on predatory. Those same men were sexually invisible to me until about 20ish. If we're talking "exclusively looking" based on age and "barely legal" then yeah I'd be asking questions too. About the sexually invisible part I don't mean 18 year olds being repulsed by 50+ year old men, I mean early 20ish women here claiming that 30 year old guys are unattractive to them on looks alone (without know…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 07:22 PM
3

How about Fresh and Fit? Those guys be setting Redpill back talkin about "cheating is okay for men because it's just a release that means nothing" lol Also the women on that show feel like controlled opposition the way one of them will occasionally bring up valid points, but then back down immediately and make it look like Fit is some kinda genius with all the right answers to knock them down completely.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 07:09 PM
1

We pretty much agree entirely on this topic, except that IMO it seems young people/Gen Z are even more sensitive about age gaps nowadays and do actually outwardly "care" a lot. But I'm not sure if that's statistically true, or if it's just anecdotal and an effect of the social media bubble amplifying certain voices. Like how some young women on PPD will swear up and down that their girlfriends all think older guys (whose precise ages they claim to reliably identify on sight) are both predatory a…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 06:56 PM
4

not sure if ironic
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 05:47 PM
1

5-10 years can be touchy but still work if the people are very compatible and the older guy genuinely looks younger than he is, or the woman older. This is why I've always said that age gap criticism is mostly about optics and unsolicited Karen behavior, no one really honestly cares THAT much about power dynamics between total strangers or saving said strangers from their dating choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 05:31 PM
–

Bill Burr is a master of being just the right amount of self-deprecating in a way that lets him say outrageous shit without getting cancelled.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 10:10 PM
–

Most risk-averse people desire stability, but the question is whether they also desire a refuge from monotony. Any relationship can grow stale and boring if both parties don't work on it. People of any age and gender will cheat because they foolishly think they can have stability while secretly pursuing excitement. So it would depend on that "state" of the relationship that they're trying to preserve.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 10:07 PM
1

*Age gap Reddit has left the chat*
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 09:55 PM
8

Men should learn how to read minds and communicate telepathically so as to avoid inflicting even the smallest amount of possible discomfort.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 08:03 PM
1

Chris Rock delivers like he's preaching a sermon
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 03:14 AM
2

Better to be overdressed than underdressed
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 06:08 PM
2

What I don’t have is sympathy for sexless men who take their disappointment out on women. Yeah that's a pretty important distinction. I'm sure most people would agree. That said we don't really have a word that's not already loaded to describe people who are non-hateful virgins, but even if there were a new word it would still turn into an insult very quickly. There's just not a lot of sympathy because the default is to assume that someone who's a virgin is probably morally defective in some way…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 01:03 AM
1

I'm not saying that sex should be enshrined in the constitution, I'm saying that being deprived of something doesn't have to literally kill you for it to be damaging to your quality of life or your dignity. No one needs loving parents or friends to live either, but telling someone "you're not gonna die if you have no friends" is a meaningless statement because that misses the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:45 AM
2

Lol definitely. Online anonymity is great for sharing recipes and bonding over fun easy topics, but terrible for trying to have any sort of discussion where people are bound to disagree and disagree badly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 10:42 PM
5

Yeah it's hard to say. It's possible that the internet amplifies certain opinions beyond their actual popularity in real life. Or it could be that it is indeed common, except that those women will just think those things quietly so you don't really witness it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 10:30 PM
4

Maybe not outright mockery, but many women (particularly past a certain age) will reinforce the idea of "virgin" being a negative by rejecting men who lack experience for whatever reason as a red flag. If your n-count is irrelevant to who you are or your moral character when it's "high" then in principle it shouldn't matter either if it's 0, voluntarily or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 10:20 PM
2

Are you going to die without the right to vote? Are you going to die if you're forced to attend a segregated school? Realize that a lot of the human rights that people fought for did not literally kill them before they won those rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 10:02 PM
1

It could be due to laziness or due to a factor beyond your control, but either way he would be justified in cheating once he felt you weren't "worth keeping around," is what you're saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 08:31 PM
1

That's what I'm saying, the idea that women shouldn't act on sexual preferences that have the potential to jeopardize their well-being is just an expedient excuse people pull out to discredit age gaps specifically. Because if heterosexual women who opposed age gaps actually acted on that principle of "better safe than sorry" then they wouldn't even be dating able-bodied men their age in the first place. But obviously that would be inconvenient for their dating life.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 07:14 PM
1

So let's say you and your man were in the same "league" when you started out dating, but then you gained weight and got fat after a couple years. Would you be okay with your man cheating on you then?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 06:52 PM
–

That's part of it, you have to just talk to girls but you also have to push yourself to do it enough to where you actually get better at talking to girls. Instead of sporadically only when the timing is perfect and you feel comfortable enough to do it. Which means at your core you have to get over the social conditioning of "being awkward" or "being creepy" and deal with uncertainty. Within common sense boundaries, of course.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 04:32 PM
–

Lol yep all the rationalizing around this attraction vs. danger dynamic ("men are naturally bigger, are we supposed to just not date them at all?") is why a lot of the age gap shaming here seems so...calculated to me. It's like, you don't actually care THAT much about the well-being of women strangers in any other situation, to the extent that you'd actually try and lecture them about the potential for their innate sexual preferences to bite them in the ass later.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 04:24 PM
–

It's a huge advantage in life even in a professional setting, beyond the obvious jobs that are only available to attractive people. You get a lot more opportunities since first impressions are critical and people will be more willing to take chances on you based on the positive feelings and assumed character traits associated with your looks. For men specifically being tall confers a lifetime salary advantage, statistically speaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 05:50 AM
4

If you're talking about things you're born with or can acquire easily then it's basically just your attire and your face or body if you're genetically lucky.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 01:48 AM
1

Nobody cares about your preferences as long as you're not acting like people who don't fit your preferences are inferior. This is patently untrue and sounds more like an ideal to strive towards than a description of reality. People who judge men who date younger women, for example, overwhelmingly base their judgment on assumptions and "statistical" projection, and lack any knowledge of whether the guy actually "hates" women his age or older or finds them inferior.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 01:45 AM
–

Being a confident ugly guy can get you further than being an average looking shy guy who never makes a move. Simply creating opportunities for yourself will improve your odds significantly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 12:53 AM
0

Because the absolute number of women using OLD is not reflected in the gender ratio at a specific snapshot in time. The women are going on OLD, matching with a minority of guys, and then deleting the apps. And then being replaced by new women. The replacement rate for men is a lot slower for obvious reasons, so it's largely the same group of guys waiting for someone to bite.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 08:40 PM
1

Because he's an internet celebrity and has money and fame and social status? Women are more forgiving with a man's looks as long as he can compensate in other ways. I'm not sure how you don't understand this unless you've never spent time around other women lol
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 05:27 PM
3

already Keyword ONE daughter...so yeah, still relevant lol
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 05:48 AM
7

Safe sex is great sex, better wear a latex Cause you dont want that late text, that "I think I'm late" text
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 05:33 AM
2

There's absolutely women that care or feel ashamed about it, they may not outwardly admit "it's embarrassing for me" or "I hate it" on PPD in those explicit terms but societally it's a source of shame that still persists without a doubt. Women are pressured to say a lower number when the conversation about past sexual partners comes up (and men are pressured in the opposite direction to inflate their experience).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 01:32 AM
-1

If men are predominantly bringing up women's n-count like it's a bad thing then that means women are primarily the ones being targeted. Which means criticism-wise women are more negatively affected by having a high one than men are. Which was my point, telling the target to grow a thick skin seems like a misdirection of energy if you're trying to refute a societal perception.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 01:22 AM
-5

So you don't think that this fixation on n-count is unhealthy and a source of mental anguish for a lot of women? If body image is a phenomenon that negatively affects millions of women then what are the odds that the discussion around female sexual promiscuity doesn't?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 12:21 AM
-4

Because simply growing a thick skin and ignoring the judgments of other people doesn't actually minimize the problem of those people making those judgments in the first place. If a woman calls out PPD's obsession with n-counts then it's not enough to tell her to "just stop caring so much what guys think." Sure, it's good advice for her, but it's only half the equation. You have to actually confront the perpetrators too or else it starts looking very victim-blamey.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/22 12:08 AM
3

Males finding females attractive enough to want to continue communicating peaks at about an "8" on the physical attractiveness scale. And then it goes down. By the time you get to the "10", they are barely seen as more attractive physically than a "5". That's because guys tend to think that the perfect 10s on OLD are probably fake profiles.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 11:33 PM
3

Too much sprawl IMO, it's all the strip malls and parking lots everywhere. Cities that are spread out and designed for cars make getting around and meeting people really soul-destroying. There's a reason why college campuses and all the culturally relevant cities (NY, DC, SF, Boston...) are high-density and walkable. LA is the only notable exception I can think of.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 10:20 PM
1

I see, so like grouping people into broad and rigid categories then? Yeah that sounds familiar on PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 07:36 PM
2

What are some examples of specific ideas that would indicate a guy was manosphere-adjacent in your opinion?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 07:07 PM
2

I meant his desirability to her, not to other people. Although in a real world scenario it's possible he has just as many women who want him as well, if they're looks or "value" matched.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 07:00 PM
2

If the woman sees the guy as a real catch then I don't think his obsession would be relationship ending. At worst she might get occasionally tired of the attention after a while. But the key is that he's irreplaceable in her mind, otherwise if she thinks she can do better then being overly obsessive might lower his value subconsciously. Even without using the word "obsession" though women are generally attracted to a man who is more competent than her, physically or otherwise. And it's human nat…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 06:39 PM
2

If she chose that individual man then she believes he's equally desirable, by definition. Men as a group being less desirable than her doesn't say anything about the specific man she chooses.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 06:33 PM
1

Because it's incredibly difficult to force people to change their preferences and judgments and ways of thinking. There will always be women who will see a guy with no/little sexual experience as a red flag, just like there will always be other men who will look down on these men who can't compete.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 06:05 PM
1

And then turn to look at each other with that "I know you seein what I'm seein right now" face
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/22 04:37 PM
1

Yeah I meant to respond to your joke with a joke but I guess it fell flat :/
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 08:21 PM
1

Lol cmon now, women over 30 aren't "geriatric" that's just mean. Seriously though I wonder what the age demographics of this sub actually are, from what I've heard it's mostly frustrated young redpill dudes and bored, older married women.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 08:16 PM
1

There's 3 sides to the age gap debate instead of the 2 people usually assume. Judging a relationship on a case-by-case basis seems like the most common sense and objectively reasonable stance to take.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 08:12 PM
1

Where's the lie? Also "stereotypes bad" = propaganda, apparently
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 08:00 PM
2

Age gap posts will never die on PPD because even the people who hate them keep bringing them up
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 07:48 PM
–

Having friends and two loving parents aren't "required" to continue living either, but I think most people would agree that quality of life is almost as important as life itself for healthy mental and physical development. I'd say sex should be much lower and closer to the "belonging" level, alongside intimate relationships. Since not having sex is seen as a mark of shame, rather than having sex being seen as an accomplishment. It's definitely psychological, and getting laid isn't really "achiev…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 01:19 AM
4

Here's an uplifting, FDS-adjacent thought: your boyfriend is only an HVM until the day you find out he isn't. ​ <sup>Skeletor will return next week with more upsetting facts</sup>
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 06:55 AM
2

Yeah you could certainly say there's levels to it, where the amount of judgment roughly follows the hierarchy of intersectional politics. With age difference at the top of the pyramid in terms of being viewed as an inherent moral vice by the most people. Of course like you said there are people who will laugh and point out that a guy is batting out of his league, or that a girl could do better. But those aren't framed as character flaws quite the same way, and most people will recognize the crit…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 06:46 AM
1

Yep, as long as you know your intentions are honest, why on earth would you gatekeep your own happiness to appease the judgment of strangers who won't even live through the consequences of your choices?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 05:42 AM
1

Sure that sounds reasonable when you say it like that, except in practice people don't really talk about any of those other factors with the same kind of self-righteousness and "Good Samaritan" zeal for protecting strangers (they wouldn't otherwise care about) like they do when they laser-focus on age difference, with seemingly superhuman levels of confidence about the outcome. A lot of the things you mentioned are politically incorrect to mention in conversation or things that don't bother peop…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 05:36 AM
4

I'd say the #1 most important commonality is shared values, because that's what lasts even after the looks fade and the interests diverge. And I don't think anyone would honestly disagree with the fact that two people of different ages can have the same values. Or that two people of the same age can have diametrically opposed values.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 05:19 AM
6

A lot of "practical concerns" that many people bring up with regard to age gaps are things they actually wouldn't give a damn about if they occurred in same-age couples. The life expectancy argument is particularly hilarious to witness because it would effectively condemn certain interracial couples, not to mention it would condone leaving your SO if they got cancer on the grounds of being totally incapable of managing your suddenly disparate life expectancies, so to speak.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 05:09 AM
0

Obligatory not all older women are less attractive. That said, women shouldn't feel bad about losing an advantage because it's not healthy to stew on it, but it's perfectly understandable and I wouldn't fault anyone. As long as they don't try to regain their advantage dishonestly by putting down other people of either gender who choose to date their more advantaged competition or are chosen before them. That goes for women who feel they're less physically attractive as well as men who feel they'…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 04:19 AM
3

I don't think there's any evidence that proves age gaps are toxic even the majority of the time (>50%). At least no study that actually pinpoints age as the determining factor of a toxic breakup, without mistaking it for confounds like personality. Let alone a consensus on the definition of an age gap that's too big. It's all anecdotal from people who mostly spend time around other people who think like them saying "I've never seen it work out." Frankly I think there's way too much "I KNOW it's …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 03:02 AM
5

I agree with most of what you said, and I did notice you qualified your post by not blaming all older women. The only issue I see when older women express concern (when it's genuine and not just a convenient shield for the jealousy motive) is when the concern bleeds over into justifying stereotypes about older men being predators, either as an overreaction to personal trauma or as acceptable payback for men justifying stereotypes about older women being "past the wall" or "undesirable." As long …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 02:50 AM
4

It's wrong to always chalk it up to jealousy, but the exact opposite extreme of suggesting it's never jealousy is just as wrong and reads like apologism for making lazy assumptions about those kinds of relationships being predatory by default. If people who shame age gaps advise dating people your age then naturally it follows that older women and younger men have the most to lose from the phenomenon of older-man age gaps being normalized. Not all older women have selfish ulterior motives to sha…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 01:52 AM
8

Because these older women now prefer to date guys their own age and don't like the idea of sharing their dating pool? You think older women are somehow exempt from human nature and emotions? Not implying all these women have ulterior motives, but it doesn't take a genius to see how someone might have selfish intentions. Same with younger men the same age as these younger women who might see old guys as competition, this isn't gender neutral.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 01:37 AM
–

Sure but prostitutes have a right to decline their services. Not saying sex is a right, but logically speaking the right to decline doesn't suddenly make something not a right. For instance, food and healthcare are widely considered human rights, but a restaurant can still refuse your service and a doctor can decline your insurance. ​ Saying someone has the “right to sex” is basically taking away a prostitutes right to say no. It doesn't take away that individual prostitute's right to refuse. De…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 09:27 PM
–

Emphasis on family. You don't want to get advice from random strangers whose interests are adversarial to yours or feel like they have something to lose by telling you the truth.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 07:32 PM
1

Lol if age gaps are bad because of the life expectancy argument where the older person will die earlier, then by equating this study to it you're pretty much endorsing the idea that men SHOULD leave their sick wives because she will die earlier than him.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 04:32 PM
3

Depends on who you ask. Some would say that a guy who beats women isn't a real man.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 03:26 AM
3

Yeah in practice abusive men get further because they can hide it longer in the dating timeline, also because physical aggression is toxic but not inherently an un-masculine trait. In principle though I'd expect women to identify the wife-beating as the bigger red flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 01:04 AM
6

It's the more immediately obvious deal breaker, at least. Although I'd be curious to know the stats on whether women are more likely to reject a guy for living at home, or whether women are more likely to leave a guy for abusing them. If they exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 11:57 PM
14

As unattractive as it is I don't see how a guy living at home is more undateable than a guy who abuses women, for instance. I thought women's top existential fear was getting hurt/killed by men. Unless safety is not your primary concern, but rather embarrassment or lack of attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 11:49 PM
1

If you recognize that men are already dominant over women of the same age, then same age relationships should also be creepy and wrong in your mind because of the inherent "power dynamic" between men and women biologically. So people should only date their own gender to completely minimize the power imbalance. And saying that "women who go after young men just think they're cute and bubbly" is literally your opinion with no evidence. All of your assertions are just "Let's assume that last thing …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 07:06 PM
4

The young ones are so much less complicated and very eager to please. 65 upvotes my sides
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 06:39 PM
0

I don't know what's worse, if they were actually incapable of noticing the contradiction or if they intentionally ignored it. I'd probably feel more sympathetic if it was the first case and most of the women were just really impressionable and getting sucked into the ideology.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 06:31 PM
0

That's just the most blatant example, but their views on age gaps aren't exactly marginal on Reddit and exist in the other subs I mentioned. Like TwoX which is fairly mainstream.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 06:26 PM
0

There were countless examples on FDS where women would upvote comments calling older men age gaps creepy and predatory, while inspirational "revenge" comments in the exact same thread talking about "I'm an older woman and I'm dating a much younger man in his 20's" or "women should date younger men because guys our age are dusty scrotes" would get upvoted. And the same women would have conflicting opinions about it depending on the gender of the older person. Also the most controversial comments …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 06:22 PM
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mammal kingdom Somewhere a biologist is weeping softly
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 03:49 PM
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People who hate age gaps: "[I] have not found emotional maturity to be a function of age with dating" Also people who hate age gaps: "Life experience (and 'power') is a function of age with dating"
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/22 03:28 PM
3

If they can leave easily and you probably won't see them again then you might as well shoot your shot, there's minimal awkwardness and you don't lose anything. I wouldn't worry too much about being seen suspiciously as a single guy, at worst people will think you're awkward or creepy being by yourself at a bar or club (which isn't cool either) but they probably won't go as far as thinking you're a potential criminal or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 06:09 PM
8

Yeah I'm aware that Japan/Tokyo are the polar opposite of North America and the poster child for outstanding urban design. And on the surface they seem like a very convincing counter-example to my density point. But I think one could make a strong case that Japan is an exception that doesn't disprove the rule due to their 1) advanced adoption of technology and the post-industrial lifestyle that's years ahead of other places and 2) extremely pervasive cultural differences that result in habits of…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 06:06 PM
9

Yeah I briefly mentioned technology as the pull factor working in tandem with urban sprawl as the push factor. I should probably give it more credit. That said I'd argue that dense places with adequate public transit like New York inside the US and many Western European cities outside the US are considerably more amenable to "spontaneous congregation" in both a social and entrepreneurial context than spread-out cities. There are density effects to being that close to talented and interesting peo…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 05:51 PM
1

Do you live in the Netherlands or something?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 05:17 PM
4

Yeah in both situations they can't leave easily, so it takes a bit more social calibration and signs of mutual interest for the interaction to go smoothly. As for exploring night life it's way easier with a group of buddies, but sometimes when you're in a new city you have to learn how to be comfortable on your own until you cultivate a new group of buddies.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 05:10 PM
58

I agree with the tweet. Car-centric urban planning is probably the biggest factor causing the decline in third places. There's too much inertia involved with getting home after a long day of work that inhibits people from driving out into traffic again to meet up with pre-existing friends they can just chat with online, let alone making new friends. The decline in social cohesion is due largely to the decline in third places, but also the pulling force of technology. Also attending activities li…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 04:59 PM
1

It's possible but then you'd have to abandon the notion that most couples are looksmatched, and accept the idea that most guys are dating above their league and that most women don't care as much as men about looks. Which are both controversial in this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 04:34 PM
2

Apparently you seem to be around colonoscopy age as well lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 01:37 AM
0

Eh, second guy could easily just be the first guy with lucky timing. An attractive woman is an attractive woman whether she's wearing a turtleneck or a string bikini. In fact a lot of guys will feel more comfortable hitting on women who are dressed more modestly because of the perception that they get less attention (which means less competition from other guys) than the "thotty" ones. Also you would think that getting hit on in professional clothes would be seen as MORE of a red flag, based on …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/22 01:23 AM
2

A+ Cim. This is why your well-reasoned opinions on this topic especially are so valuable. You speak with the experience of someone who's actually been in a large age gap, but also with the calm objectivity and respect for evidence (instead of stereotypes and insults) of someone who hasn't been immovably biased by a personal or anecdotal horror story. Without pandering to either the I-think-it's-gross side or the older-women-be-jealous side. It shouldn't be that hard to simply admit that "legal a…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 11:49 PM
2

I don't come across couples who have different level incomes often You...don't? It's not even that rare. If you had a female friend who made 60K and her boyfriend/husband made >100K then you'd be grossed out by their relationship? That's kinda hard to believe.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 11:09 PM
4

That's still doesn't explain the discrepancy though. There are same-age income gaps but you don't hear the "too rich for you" complaint. And since the income gap is potentially a bigger source of influence and manipulation than the age difference then you'd expect to hear that complaint in relationships where both income and age gaps exist, but people almost always focus on the age.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 11:03 PM
4

Are they though? If your female friend were dating a guy who made significantly more money than her you probably wouldn't think to yourself "ugh that's creepy" and persuade her to end the relationship just from knowing their salaries.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 10:59 PM
1

You said the man "insists" on being the provider. Which kind of sounds like he subscribes to sexist stereotypes where he should be the breadwinner and she should stay home or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 10:51 PM
3

You're changing the analogy. For it to be equivalent you'd have to be grossed out by any couple where the man makes more money than the woman on paper, without knowing anything else about them or his personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 10:44 PM
0

So in principle income gaps should be viewed more suspiciously than age gaps, because people are considerably more reliably influenced by money than "wisdom" or supposed "respect for elders." But you never hear people say "he's too rich for you" the way they say "he's too old for you."
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 10:41 PM
4

The employee/manager thing is a misrepresentation of OP's "income gap" point. A boss dating their employee isn't wrong because they make different amounts of money, it's wrong because the manager has direct seniority over the employee and therefore the employee can't reject them without jeopardizing their career. You're conflating it with the "don't date subordinates/coworkers" rule. OP is talking about a guy who makes more money than the woman he's dating who he has no firing power over.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 10:32 PM
2

Is there some context I'm missing or is this just a caption contest?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 04:30 PM
1

Rock is still pretty mainstream in other countries
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 04:18 PM
1

That's because, generally, the intended recipient of their messaging is not the actual people whose behavior they're trying to address and correct. The intended audience is often the victims of said behavior to whom they're trying to signal "I'm on YOUR side, even if I'm a member of the victimizing group." For those on the left who are genuine about righting wrongs the messaging ends up being pretty ineffective despite good intentions. But for those who are just virtue signaling it comes across …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 09:01 PM
0

Saying that "your personal experience doesn't represent your entire gender" is not speaking for that gender. It's doing the opposite by correcting a generalization and avoiding the mistake of over-inflating anecdotal value. When a woman says "I'm a young woman and I think older men are gross" that may be true for her individually but it doesn't really answer the question of what proportion of women are actually attracted to older men. Replace "older men" with any other variable like "skinny guys…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 01:20 AM
1

I mean sure but it's not that black and white, there's levels to it. Just because you're not Brad Pitt doesn't mean you're butt ugly, you can be 70% as good-looking and still attract some younger women. I've never seen a study on age-disparate attraction that was age-blind, but if it existed then I would probably cite it instead of using personal preference as your source. That said, the truth is somewhere in the middle. It's not 100% of young women who are into older men (which no one believes)…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 12:53 AM
7

Potentially, but not necessarily. But I'm not even trying to claim that they're highly correlated, just demonstrating that statistical averages aren't always that meaningful to the individual when you're talking about a population that is very heterogeneous.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 12:32 AM
5

OK sure, then I'm asking people claiming that the bastardized Wall occurs at age 35 or whenever to actually show their work so I can potentially refute their bastardized Wall.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 12:09 AM
7

OP and most people replying seem to be basing it primarily on looks so that's the kind of photo "evidence" of their assertions I'm asking for.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 11:49 PM
11

I think these wall posts would be a lot more insightful if people included actual example pics of "post-wall" 30/35 year-olds in their minds, so others could compare and see if they actually look better or worse and whether the commenter's frame of reference is accurate.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 11:41 PM
12

The median annual income is about $55-60K in the US but every one I know working in the same industry is clearing the 6 figure threshold. Averages of hundreds of millions of people aren't very instructive when applied to individuals. If you're already making top 20% income then it's not inconceivable that your potential age gap could also be in the top quintiles, in terms of how much bigger it is than the 2.3 year average gap or whatever the value currently is.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 11:24 PM
-1

He's suggesting that maybe your opinion on older men is not representative of every young woman's, in the same way you being an escort is not representative of every woman's experience. There's a lot of "speaking for all other women" going on in PPD, in that a lot of women themselves are pushing AWALT to prove an opinion that they personally happen to agree with.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 11:14 PM
-1

Also putting the upper limit of "women who aren't attracted to 30+ men" all the way up to 26 instantly stretches the limits of credulity. It's laughable that a woman even in her mid twenties would find a 27 year old guy hot but somehow not a 32 year old, even if it wasn't a blind test and she knew their ages.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 11:07 PM
-1

Q: How would these women even know the ages of men they see and interact with in real life to know that none of the attractive ones could possibly have been over 30? How does anyone know that about anyone? Unless you're talking about the small sample that is the people you immediately work with or something similar. You're making a claim based on a preconceived notion that >30 = unattractive, fat, balding, has kids and let themselves go, etc. That hurts both genders. You can see how problematic …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 10:56 PM
2

Not everyone is as stoic as you are. It's good to not care about societal judgment and just be unwaveringly confident in yourself but that still doesn't absolve the other side. Morally the onus is on the ones passing judgment to stop doing it if it's indefensible, not on the person being judged to just lie down and accept it. If I saw someone mocking a guy for preferring other men I wouldn't tell the victim "stop caring so much what others think of you!" Instead I'd probably tell the person doin…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 10:25 PM
3

however every example that I see is one where the person with the preference is solidified in their belief that it’s not inherently wrong. Maybe outwardly it might seem that way but that's not necessarily the conclusion I would draw. People asking for second opinions can take many forms: sometimes it's through explicitly asking questions in dating subs which you see alot ("am I wrong/is this okay"), and sometimes it's through CMV posts or statements that they're hoping to gauge the reactions to.…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 08:05 PM
2

If the things you like are popular and not very controversial then it'd be fairly easy not to be insecure about them. OTOH if you're told your preferences make you a weird or bad person then yes I'd imagine that would make you doubt the core of who you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 07:01 PM
2

Because unless you're totally asocial then most people are on some level affected by criticism and seek validation that they're not bad people or doing something wrong. It's understandable how someone would feel confused if they had a preference that they felt wasn't inherently wrong but that society and culture kept telling them was immoral. "Stop giving a fuck" only addresses the victim side of the equation, it ignores the responsibility of the victimizers to stop casting baseless judgment. If…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 06:43 PM
2

He probably has one of those detective's "crazy walls" with the strings all over the place
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 10:35 PM
2

I'll bet they could get through an entire song without using the same name twice
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 10:10 PM
4

Rappers in Westeros must have a real easy time rhyming Targaryen names
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 09:31 PM
1

Cancel culture gone too far smh
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 07:52 PM
1

Looks are "respectable" if we're talking about lifting weights and literally building your body. But being facially good-looking is something you're born with pretty much, so I'd sooner respect a man who earned his money than a guy who hit the genetic lottery.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 05:48 PM
2

Yeah it annoys me when people bring up research studies and statistics without interpreting them critically or accurately. They just jump straight away to the numbers that seem to support their biases without considering any confounds or limitations in the study or social implications of making a broad conclusion. There's that one divorce statistic on age gaps that people constantly bring up to show how they're inadvisable or even morally wrong. But the problem is that you could make the exact s…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 05:40 PM
2

Sure, I'm just describing general trends. Certainly there exist enough people who judge according to their own different and probably less stringent criteria where you don't have to worry too much about not being conventionally attractive or successful and not finding anyone who likes you. Whether you're a woman or a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 05:23 PM
2

People mocking people on the internet is just par for the course, there's not much you can do about that. And putting up with criticism is par for the course if you want to benefit from fame. It's shitty but you kinda have to take the good attention with the bad. I doubt Dream will have any problems with dating though, because he's Dream. That's the part he's able to compensate with, if that's what you mean by "what should be done." Sure, not everyone can be a Youtube star, but this works on man…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 05:04 PM
2

Yeah that's true, a lot of guys take that leeway to the extreme and skate by on looking disheveled or untrained. But the ones who can't pull it off are usually forced to realize their mistake and start exercising and looking presentable, otherwise they just keep failing forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 04:51 PM
14

I think men are judged on more criteria, but they have more leeway to mess up in one area and compensate by excelling in another area. One of those is looks, as you mention. So it's not so much that you need to have all these things, but rather "you need to have enough of these things to add up to [individual woman's passing score]." Whereas women are judged by fewer criteria but looks are a bigger slice of the pie. Broadly generalizing, of course. And this is in the early honeymoon stages of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 04:35 PM
11

Both of those are fine, in my opinion. At worst you can call it shallow (but not morally wrong). Thing is, people don't usually mistake a woman's wealthy-man preference with anything else. However a lot of people (willfully or ignorantly) mistake a man's youth/beauty preference for a "desire to manipulate." As far as labels go, I think "gold digger" to describe wanting a wealthy man is a somewhat more accurate and charitable (heh, sorry) insult than "predator" is for describing wanting a beautif…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 04:26 PM
5

Yeah I know, you did mention someone else made the comparison, I was just responding indirectly to them and anyone else who might have agreed because I was too lazy to find the actual post. Didn't mean to shoot the messenger. And you're right, the bias against pitbulls is real because I also have it. But the way I see it I don't have any moral reservations about discriminating against pitbulls or hurting their feelings, so when I see one on the street it's more about "better safe than sorry" for…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 03:03 AM
5

Safely owning a pitbull is like safely owning a gun except arguably more dangerous because of the uncertainty. You can't possibly account for every contingency if they happen to encounter people or animals that suddenly set off their erratic behavior. The point is that like gun control, there are ways to prevent deaths and injuries involving pitbulls (pitbull injuries are often mutilating and life-changing for the victims). Owners should be required to get a license and training and muzzle their…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 02:48 AM
2

That's a bit simplistic I think. Even without accounting for the fact that "unattractive" is subjective to women and that we don't know anything else about this guy, there's a wider spectrum of dating options for men than simply Chadsexuals or gold diggers. Unless the guy spends all his time working for the 500K, in which case yes he's probably staying single but only because of lack of time and not for lack of potential.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 07:18 PM
5

I like how they don't reveal the breed of the dogs in the article until after the jump. Also "pibbles" as an attempt at a cutesy rebrand is just disgusting euphemism.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 06:57 PM
2

Attractive guy with 50K job = unattractive guy with 500K job > meh guy with 150K job In terms of dating success? 500K annual is serious money that can set you apart from your competition and afford you a comfortable lifestyle and interesting hobbies. At the very least it affords you the ability to buy a house on one income, if you live in a high COL area.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 06:26 PM
2

"Nicer" is very generous, thanks. I don't think I have nearly the same level of tolerance and patience for bad faith arguments as you seemed to lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 01:53 AM
1

I see, that's an interesting reaction. Especially the ones who were actually repulsed, some odd assumptions going on there. Also welcome back Cim! Good to see one more voice of reason around here.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 01:17 AM
1

From the way you describe it that reaction to your virginity seems more like impatience from horny guys rather than active disgust at what they considered a "red flag" or a dealbreaker. It's pretty common for dudes to ghost after a date or two when they don't get what they want, regardless of whether the girl is experienced or not. Then again we might just have had different experiences or hung around different crowds, I don't know any guy who was repulsed by 22 year old female virgins when they…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 01:07 AM
2

Which part? The virgin guy weird or the virgin woman not weird part?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 12:57 AM
1

Morality shouldn't be gender specific, but cultural perceptions of sexual promiscuity are unfortunately gendered and in opposing directions.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 12:55 AM
-3

N-count seems to be the one preference where consistency is often seen as acting the opposite of what you'd expect in the other gender. Since culturally, being a virgin is a shameful red flag if you're a man and a positive if you're a woman. And vice versa: being sexually promiscuous is considered shameful if you're a woman and a sign that there's a good reason you're a catch that women find attractive if you're a man. So ironically a virgin guy would be seen as a hypocrite for wanting a virgin …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/22 12:36 AM
0

Some people would say that being a silent bystander in the face of bigotry makes you complicit.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 09:10 PM
1

I see, yeah you'd still have to deal with traffic and widening roads though because that wouldn't really cut down the number of cars that much unless everyone was willing to carpool. A bus would still be more efficient space-wise.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 07:44 PM
1

Self driving buses, maybe. But if everyone rode their own self-driving cars we'd still need to build all those space-wasting parking lots.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 07:32 PM
3

Cities should be dense and walkable and have decent public transportation. Self-driving cars will only exacerbate urban sprawl because desperate people will put up with living 3 hours from work as long as they can take a nap in their car.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 06:46 PM
1

I agree, that's entirely possible. It's kinda like when people on PPD recognize that "a lot of nice guys would cheat and be toxic just like chads if they had the opportunities to cheat and be toxic." If the only thing stopping you from doing something bad versus thinking about it is simply the lack of opportunity or ability to do it successfully then you're equally morally bad. Attempted murder doesn't make the criminal less evil than successful murder simply because they were incompetent and fa…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 05:56 PM
2

One of those times where "Just imagine them in their underwear!" is way less effective a strategy for managing anxiety than something more crude like "She gets angry diarrhea same as most human beings do"
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 02:38 AM
1

Right that's the easy scenario, that's why I said it depends on what you mean. If they mess up your order 3 times and the waiter gets cross with you would you start a shouting match in the restaurant or would you just say "fuck it" and leave a bad review? You'd be surprised how many people would rather not get confrontational.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 12:22 AM
2

Depends on what you mean by "correct." It's not healthy for a person to be so self-conscious, but the truth is people just have an innate fear of being judged in public. And sometimes there's not much room between being perceived as acting like a bitch vs. acting like a Karen. There are times when people let something go especially when it's not that big a deal because they don't want to cause a scene by "asking for the manager" or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/22 12:17 AM
1

Having gone to jail or being unemployed is verifiable. Saying someone is a "red flag" because their n-count is 0 or 100 is an assumption of their character based on a stereotype. Huge difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 09:28 PM
-1

It's more that if you're going to claim that men have NO value in terms of physical strength (because it's an "obsolete" skill supposedly), then it's kind of on you to prove that EVERY woman is capable of doing those things without a man's help for your argument to make sense. Obviously there are strong women and women with enough disposable income to just hire professional help whenever they feel like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 05:10 AM
4

What % of women who own a hitachi magic wand actually use it for its original advertised purpose?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 04:53 AM
-1

Check out that noise in the middle of the night or that suspicious guy at your front door? It's about peace of mind and confidence in one's physical strength as much as it is about actual physical strength. ​ The physical superiority is obsolete as mental labor is more important than physical labor Lol that sounds like an opinion that only someone who's never had to fix shit around the house could afford to have. I've never witnessed someone open a stuck jar or lift up a washing machine with "me…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 04:18 AM
2

Yeah I agree that's a fairer system
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 01:24 AM
2

Also people will shame you for supporting a third party because they're afraid you'll "split the vote" away from their favorite candidates. Which, ironically, seems pretty anti-democratic in principle.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 01:15 AM
1

What you admire in men (confidence) is not what women desire in men (confidence)? Yeah I guess I don't understand your tagline then if that example doesn't disprove it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 01:06 AM
1

I'm pretty sure women still desire a confident man though
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 12:51 AM
1

If I were gay I probably wouldn't be opposed to the idea
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 12:48 AM
1

But I admire confidence, checkmate!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 12:38 AM
1

These class definitions are fluid and often overlap because income mobility exists, especially UMC. There are plenty of people with degrees from top universities who lack generational wealth, for instance.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 12:34 AM
1

We need to update Chappelle's bit to "How old is 25 really?" for the modern era.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 10:27 PM
1

Too much of anything gets boring after a while. It's like when you get all the cheat codes in a video game it's super fun for a bit but then stops being fun altogether.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 10:11 PM
4

Maybe they don't drink
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 07:56 PM
1

The meaningless advice I'm referring to is when women advise men NOT to hit on them at the gym by talking about how they personally don't like getting hit on.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 07:12 PM
2

The point is that it's meaningless as internet advice directed towards men.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 06:46 PM
1

"Doesn't exist! Women in grocery stores are there to work and run errands, not to satisfy men's dicks and egos!" (- feminist Reddit)
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 05:32 AM
3

The most obvious reason I can think of besides high anxiety is probably high standards. Statistically I'm sure a lot of incels have gotten attention in their lifetime from women they thought were unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 05:15 AM
1

I get what you're saying. Personally if they're deliberately seeking out people of a certain age to manipulate them then yes I'd agree it's bad, if I somehow knew that about them. If they exclusively date younger by chance because every person they're attracted to and meet in real life happens to be in their twenties then it's hard to say it's wrong as a stranger just from looking at their ages. Problem is that it's easy to conflate the looks preference with the age preference that involves some…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 09:13 PM
2

That hardly addresses the age gap. You could say the same thing about letting young women live their lives without having to worry about "feeling" grossed out by ugly guys or pushy guys their own age creeping on them. Creeps come in all varieties. And creepiness is subjective to each individual woman, so there's pretty much no moral argument against large age gaps that supports the idea they're always bad. Quite literally none, unless you can read minds or believe that stereotypes about groups o…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 08:57 PM
2

How so? They're both defensible. Being black and having a type (based on looks or age or height or any other immutable dating preference) are neither inherently wrong nor something you have control over. A woman liking strong, tall guys doesn't mean she likes to be dominated or abused, or that she hates short men. Neither does a man liking hot younger women mean he likes to dominate or abuse, or that he hates older women. What sense does it make to criticize someone else's preference that is nei…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 08:17 PM
1

The discussion is about huge age gaps, not grooming. And the majority of women criticizing age gaps online is from women broadly generalizing about legal age gaps based on the idea that they're universally morally wrong, instead of actually citing personal anecdotes of being groomed. If someone truly and stubbornly believed that huge age gaps were always morally wrong then even a gay man saying "I don't feel groomed" would do nothing to convince them that he's not actually being groomed. And the…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 07:40 PM
1

OK but if that were the case then you would expect that concern to also manifest itself in an equal level of harsh and unhesitant criticism of lesbian age gaps, and calling those older lesbians creepy and manipulative.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 07:11 PM
1

Expressing your opinion about someone else's heterosexual age gap that doesn't involve you or someone you know would technically also be "not my circus, not my monkeys." I wouldn't use that line if I were against age gaps. At minimum it makes you look like you only care about heterosexual age gaps because it affects your dating pool, instead of trying to protect young people straight or gay regardless of whether they're "competition" for men your age.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 06:49 PM
1

Lol if the primary concern is about protecting vulnerable young people then it shouldn't matter one bit whether they care, people would do it anyway. Young women who date older men and don't care about the supposed risks are often told that "they don't know better" and that talking them out of the relationship is some sort of public service or good Samaritan act of unselfish compassion. People don't want to touch same-sex age gaps because it's more politically incorrect to do so, same with older…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 06:28 PM
1

Yep. It's even plausible that in the future the idea that brain development extends far beyond into your thirties or later becomes mainstream. At that point I imagine a lot of people will start seriously reconsidering the debate between protection vs freedom, legally and culturally.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 05:59 PM
1

Court cases would probably request brain scans of minors to prove how (un)developed they may be. Yeah the implications of that if it were hypothetically applied more broadly to other things like verifying driver/voter competency would be very interesting to see.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 05:41 PM
1

I feel like a lot of incels are actually standardcels
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 05:32 PM
2

It's not necessarily creepy when they're in the same developmental area. They wouldn't be though, because if your brain is fully developed by 25 then you'd be taking advantage of someone even 1-2 years younger than you whose brain isn't yet. So they'd be a "minor" in mental and moral terms. I'm talking about people who are stubborn about the 25 year old thing and not my personal opinion, by the way.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 05:26 PM
1

That would be just as bad. In fact a 23 year old woman marrying a 50 year old dude would be equally wrong, no more and no less. According to the same logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 05:19 PM
1

What would that change?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 05:07 PM
3

If the brain "finishing development" at 25 is such an unwavering moral hard line in your (hopefully over 25 year-old) mind, then you should be fully on board with the idea that a 26 year old dating a 24 year old is creepy.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 05:02 PM
3

What is it with so many people on PPD being unable or unwilling to accurately interpret analogy? If you actually read the comment exchange I'm not comparing black people with men who date younger women, I'm comparing the "unthinkable" prospect of a white person defending black people (despite being white) and someone who's personally not into age gaps conceivably defending someone who might have that preference from being called creepy or gross without evidence. Come on, critical thinking...
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/22 04:45 PM
4

I mean that argument works both ways. Do you not "notice" and prefer people you find physically attractive? I think we can all agree that people care about looks when dating and that what we prefer in looks are subjective. Entitled is not an old guy hitting on you, entitled would be him hitting on you and expecting you to say yes without any uncertainty. And entitled would be you saying that someone who can't read your mind isn't even allowed to hit on you. Frankly that would be an odd mindset f…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 08:29 PM
1

If you engage him in conversation and ask a lot of questions (without being prompted) and laugh at his jokes more than you do with other guys then that's a pretty subtle and natural reaction people have to someone they like, without making it look too contrived. Any more subtle than that and he might misinterpret your interest as just your personality or being polite or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 08:15 PM
2

Invite him to activities with just the two of you. If it's a hobby or something you're really interested in then that gives you some plausible deniability (but he might still suspect). Express disappointment when more people show up than you "expected." If he's the type to not pick up on hints then tell him directly. Women have a superpower men don't in that they can typically be direct about these things without coming across like a creep.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:56 PM
0

The point of an analogy is to compare how two things are similar, not to pedantically pick out the details of how they differ. Obviously age gap criticism doesn't usually involve murder (unless you're the father of the young woman in question). Again, the point is that you don't have to be a member of group A to defend group A in principle. and the other wants to fuck someone who was in high school last year. Straw man of straw men, let's not pretend that people suddenly stop whining about age g…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:45 PM
4

I wouldn't go so far as "villain" but it is kind of entitled tbh. Like a "hot" girl thinking homely looking men are beneath her and feeling insulted by the idea they would even consider that she might be into them. Sure your looks and age are what people notice about you first but they don't determine who you are as a person.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:38 PM
9

You're allowed to feel like someone is being predatory with you, that's your subjective reaction and your personal perspective. But it makes no sense to project your biases onto ALL older people and talk about it like some universal truth that every woman even agrees with you on.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:29 PM
5

Exactly. Why even mention it bothers you if 1) it doesn't involve you and 2) you don't think it should be illegal? If someone made a remark about "I think gay people are kinda gross" you'd probably think they were weirdly homophobic for just blurting out their random opinion without a point behind it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:22 PM
6

My bf is 23 and honestly there are things we just don’t have in common at all and there’s only a two year age difference… If anything that seems like an argument in favor of age poorly correlating to whether you'd have things in common. I'd have way more in common with someone of the same cultural and educational background and same personality as me, but different in age...than I would with someone of the same age but completely different personality and cultural/educational background.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:10 PM
4

Obviously you're allowed to think whoever you want is gross, but as a moral argument it's about as effective as a conservative thinking gay marriage is wrong because it's "gross" and makes them "uncomfortable."
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:02 PM
1

For starters, most of the dudes getting all worked up defending the age gap aren't going to get that opportunity so why get so defensive about something you'll never even do? That's like asking "why would you defend black people if you're not even in a position to be singled out by the cops and brutalized because of your race?" It shouldn't be that hard to advocate in principle for a group of people who are unfairly judged, even if you're not a part of that group. Even if you're not politically …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 07:00 PM
1

I meant if it were a girl instead like in your hypothetical then people on Twitter would be a lot more protective of her and calling out the haters. Twitter itself wouldn't actually censor it I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 06:47 PM
2

If you're talking about Twitter then probably but from what I've seen it would just be like 20% people actually calling her ugly and 80% people calling out the people calling her ugly. So the ones defending her would take over the hashtag.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 06:41 PM
1

Confidence in the absence of competence or validation usually comes from two different sources. Either you don't care about the results such that your lack of ability is immaterial to the emotional outcome. In general terms this is a DGAF attitude, in situational terms it's called being lucky or in your comfort zone. Or, confidence results from stubbornly clinging to a self-affirming belief, something that could also be called faith or even a positive delusion. Despite your lack of ability you b…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/22 01:11 AM
4

There's no "writing" in the news and non-fictional content like real life. Also you're kind of implying that all of those media where it's possible for some men to misrepresent women are just as bad as porn because guys with no capacity to think critically get influenced. So literature is bad for men's minds, got it lol
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 06:12 PM
2

Every form of non-pornographic media contains women who are presented as human beings instead of objects (even amateur porn can do that). Unless you're talking about a guy who's never watched a movie, read a book, watched the news, interacted with a woman in any capacity in his day-to-day life, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 06:04 PM
3

I doubt that's the case any more than video games "make people violent" who weren't already predisposed to violence. Most people are aware of the laughably bad acting and fake scenarios involving women in porn and that porn is ultimately a fantasy.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 05:53 PM
1

I still not convinced that boxxy and shoeonhead aren't the same person
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 05:45 PM
2

It's logical to marry someone who is BOTH frugal and discreet but also physically attractive to you, it's not an either-or. And you're not picking a business partner, you're picking a life and love partner. Loss of physical attraction can also destroy a marriage. In fact you could argue that the reality that looks fade makes it even more relevant to marry someone who looks amazing, so that a 10 to you now will still look like an 8 to you 30 years later provided they age well. Not to endorse bein…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 05:29 PM
1

Since that works both ways, are you on the side that the divorce stats are bogus or trustworthy for either situation?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 05:12 PM
2

Maybe that wasn't the best example of good social skills (instead of a specific subset of social skills that isn't broadly applicable) because public speaking is more prepared and less impromptu than carrying a casual conversation, but I was trying to get across the idea that people who are great at the specific skill of public speaking without getting visibly nervous don't have to fake being a calm public speaker because they've already mastered that skill. You can't "pretend" to stop your body…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 04:36 PM
5

I'm not sure you can "fake" social skills you don't actually have any more than you can fake playing the guitar or fake singing opera or fake speaking Spanish to a crowd of Spanish people, just by trying hard in that moment. By definition if you can exude confidence on demand then you're already confident enough, if you can carry a conversation and tell funny stories then you're already at that level without having to fake anything. What you're thinking of is more like a shot of liquid courage t…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 02:32 AM
4

Thanks, it's one of my biggest pet peeves
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/22 07:00 PM
31

Anxiety isn't as much of a social penalty for women as it is for men. A shy woman can usually still be desirable as long as there are men who find her attractive, but anxiety in a man can be a huge turn-off even if he passes her looks standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/22 06:51 PM
1

Oh I see, well tbf there were some direct answers. Although that's a fairly tame question to begin with so that's not unexpected.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 11:16 PM
1

Obviously I'm talking about still getting those kinds of evasive responses to earnestly thought-out points and not low-effort remarks like "women hit the wall hurr durr"
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 11:06 PM
1

Lol did you just come from that male preferences post? Deflection and evasive answers everywhere. I wouldn't say most, but a lot of PPD women it seems are incapable of addressing points logically and dispassionately, especially on controversial topics. Almost as if it's the most difficult thing in the world simply to admit "yeah I guess you're right, broad generalizations like 'men are bad for having such-and-such preference' are probably inaccurate and wrong and meaningless for productive discu…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 10:52 PM
2

I love how your reasoning consists entirely of your personal opinion and meaningful, objective terms like "gross." Very compelling argument. Not sure why I expected more from you even when given the chance to defend yourself and women in this sub from charges of bad faith, but thanks for providing proof of that behavior I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 10:25 PM
0

I'm glad that OP mentioned the age preference because it's the one preference where women who criticize it constantly demonstrate how they have no rational argument to support their supposedly universally accurate criticism, especially when applied to specific individuals they don't know instead of broad stereotypes. As well as demonstrating they have no clear conception of what "too old" and "too young" are, both in defining the boundaries of the problem and applying those labels (insults) cons…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 09:55 PM
4

There's a lot of that too
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 04:38 AM
6

The night is dark and full of spoilers
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 04:06 AM
2

How very egalitarian of you lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/22 12:54 AM
3

Repeated interactions over a decent enough amount of time to know a guy's personality, sure. Traits like leadership skills and confidence under pressure aren't always apparent at a first glance or in a low-stakes, casual context.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 06:41 PM
2

Assuming you're dating women in your age range then they'll care more about other things besides looks. If you're dating younger then your looks will likely matter proportionally more.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 05:31 PM
–

If socioeconomic conditions are a valid context for offloading blame from certain groups for committing crime, then surely biological and hormonal factors that are arguably harder to change should also be considered valid context for mitigating the blame placed on certain other groups.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 05:34 AM
–

That may be true in your experience, I'm talking more about the principle of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 05:24 AM
–

Yeah that would be a more reasonable application of statistics
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 05:23 AM
–

OK then address those men you're talking about with your charges of hypocrisy. I don't gloat about statistics that make women look bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 05:14 AM
–

I mean if you extend that reasoning to statements people make based on race instead of gender ("What? I'm not racist it's just crime statistics") then you can kind of see why it might come across as specious, insincere, and kind of insulting.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 04:32 AM
–

Well so that depends on what your point is. It's not sexist to rely on statistics if you're trying to protect yourself in a potentially life-threatening situation, or if you're doing public policy research and earnestly trying to solve a problem. It is sexist if you're wielding it like a club in a discussion to make a gross generalization about a group as some kind of gotcha.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 04:28 AM
–

Stop infantilizing 18 year olds and treat them like adults you busybody Karen...unless we're talking about dating older men in which case they're totally not adults until 25 or something
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 04:20 AM
–

Conveniently it seems every other woman online has a personal story of dating a 30 year old at their disposal whenever they're trying to prove how toxic age gaps are
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 04:17 AM
–

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 02:19 AM
–

Really living that Steinbeck life
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/22 02:05 AM
3

It's more of an "OR" rather than an "AND" if you have enough of the other stuff to compensate. That's why dating is both easier and harder for men depending on your circumstances.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/22 05:11 PM
1

Meme? Rolled-up sleeves are like catnip to the ladies apparently
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 10:14 PM
0

Or if men somehow shrank 1 inch in height every year from 25 to 35 let's say.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 04:59 PM
1

If that's the tone of every post then maybe the quality of discussion here would improve if we didn't incentivize those attitudes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 02:49 AM
4

Sure but mentioning that other people will judge you is obvious and doesn't really indicate that you understand or sympathize with the point of the post that preferences shouldn't be controversial. Your response does come across more dismissive than you probably intended, like "that's the way it is so suck it up!"
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 02:41 AM
4

Lol you can't be serious, plenty of women on PPD and social media attack men's preferences unsolicited and without personal knowledge of them. Mostly said men are internet strangers who have no prior history or indication of being misogynistic, as far as they'd have the ability to tell.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 02:32 AM
4

and other people can and will make their own assumptions about why you prefer a virgin You'd have to seriously lack self-awareness or a sense for irony if you can't see the issue with assuming and criticizing someone's "reasoning" for a preference without actually knowing them. These kinds of assumptions and stereotypes are the reason why these online spaces are an endless cycle of men and women complaining about nosy strangers gatekeeping their dating preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 02:29 AM
3

There's no foolproof way of vetting someone completely, but since we're on the topic one good sign would be that she at least offers to pay during the early dates. Even if it's just a formality at least it's an effort at showing goodwill. Again I personally don't mind the idea of the guy taking a chance. That said I also don't mind the idea of women taking the initiative and feeling more empowered to make the first move in 2022.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 02:19 AM
6

Personally I think that seems a bit excessive, but it's not hard to understand how the idea of paying money for an outcome that has no guarantee of success would make anyone uneasy or at minimum hesitant in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 02:09 AM
3

Those two situations aren't the same. Unless you guys went on multiple dates where he paid before you even had sex the first time (and you know for a fact that didn't bother him), he's already gotten what he wanted from you so him being generous now doesn't feel as much like a risk.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 01:59 AM
3

Whining is at least somewhat understandable if the behavior or mentality they're whining about is actually malicious, and not just something they're unhappy about and eager to generalize about. Strawmanning is no more than a bad-faith attempt at derailing conversation because the person knows they don't have a valid counter argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 09:52 PM
1

I'm not suggesting that being tall isn't a tremendous advantage, just that it's not always enough. Even pros in dating can become "cons" if they spotlight your flaws and heighten (sorry) women's expectations of you that you can't deliver on.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 09:30 PM
1

You can be tall and lanky or tall and awkward. If you're not attractive then your height can make you stand out in a bad way.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 09:19 PM
2

just Socially inept is probably harder to fix than unfit. An awkward person trying to improve their social skills would be like trying to lift weights if weights were capable of actively avoiding skinny people.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 09:11 PM
4

It's like applying for jobs, you shouldn't artificially limit yourself just because you feel unqualified on paper.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 04:27 AM
3

When women say "he's a catch" about a guy they're not implying that they're the ones approaching him. It's just a qualitative assessment.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 04:23 AM
1

Again "hitting the wall at 25" for women is a minority opinion that gets amplified on social media, so most men don't think that way. Regardless of gap or no gap, in either case people are still making a subjective judgment about age and looks which may be absolutely true for them but not at all generalizable.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 09:42 PM
2

Sure that's your opinion, and technically opinions based on feelings are 100% "true" for the person holding the opinion. But then that just means you should be perfectly able to understand why a guy thinking 25 year olds are gross is his opinion as well. Or a homophobe thinking gay couples are weird. Doesn't make it universally true, accurate, or something you can prove objectively as a general statement, since it's a personal preference.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 09:09 PM
5

Most men of any age don't actually think that 25 year old women are "too old" or "elderly" or "post-wall." It's more about how well you age than your actual age. This is true for women and men alike. However, it does seem societally acceptable for women to describe men who approach them as "too old" or "disgusting" or "creepy." So to be honest this ageism thing runs both ways and both sides are guilty of it. Whether employed offensively or defensively.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 09:01 PM
1

Demographics and culture matter, that's true. But dating is largely about opportunity and density, it's a distribution problem. It's not hard to imagine how meeting people and dating in SF would be even harder if it were spread out, and how much easier it would be in LA if it were compact. I'm sure there are other factors that overshadow the urban design part for places like SF and LA, but because driving into the city takes more effort and time and money than walking a block down the street fro…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 08:06 PM
4

Your point about car culture is excellent. Problem is that urban sprawl is only one issue in a pipeline of issues going back to poor educational outcomes, income inequality, high crime rates resulting in "mean streets vs. safe suburb" stereotypes, lack of trust in public transportation, negative perceptions of urban density, and "self-reliance" culture that you'd need to solve first for it to be politically feasible. At least in North America.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 06:42 PM
2

Only if you're prepared and willing to find a new volleyball league if one of them decides to start drama. In which case yeah shoot your shot.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 06:18 PM
2

Bits?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 04:57 AM
2

How do women relate to it? You mean like periods or pregnancy? I'd guess probably for men it's puberty or old age or something like cancer even.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 03:42 AM
2

Yeah that too, there's no reason to think two people of different ages from the same culture would necessarily have a harder time relating to each other than two same-aged people from entirely different cultures.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 03:17 AM
6

I know right, there's a reason the advertising demographic is 18-to-34, not 18-to-19. It's not as though interests and hobbies last at most for 2 to 3 years only for us to discard and forget them. Or that college students all happen to love exclusively talking about school work and GPAs outside of school lol It's like...haven't you ever seen the crowd at a sports game or something? Are you utterly incapable of shooting the breeze with a cousin or friend who's a different age than you? And yet pe…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 02:56 AM
3

Maybe not the mods, but a sizable portion of their membership is/was politically left despite the sub claiming to transcend politics. Not to mention there was significant backlash when they added that conservative host onto their podcast.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/22 04:46 AM
2

FDS is absolutely bonkers with their racist/transphobic/etc-ist rhetoric and makes a convincing case for the idea that horseshoe theory is real. I've never seen self-professed progressives and feminists gatekeep interracial relationships as hard as they do. Except for maybe some extreme characters you find on black (and even white, apparently) Twitter.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/22 04:10 AM
2

What it also says is that the tired argument that "men date younger because they can't get women their own age" is BS. Common sense would suggest that if they can attract women across an age gap then obviously they can attract same age women.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/22 03:57 AM
2

Not to endorse wall discourse but many men generally see their physical peak sometime between late twenties and early thirties. Later for certain ethnic minorities.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/22 03:55 AM
2

It's probably a mixed bag, internet anonymity definitely makes some people more honest but others more dishonest, precisely because you can't possibly fact check their statements to know if they're speaking from experience or trying to push a narrative.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/22 03:46 AM
0

And the study about men finding women in their 20s the hottest also claims that women in their 20s find men in their 20s the hottest. That doesn't address the point I made in the previous comment, at all. For those who don’t, you can check out the SugarBaby subs Again, how convenient. "Anyone in their 20s who would date an older man is probably a sugar baby." This is the kind of parody that passes for reasoned argument in this sub, apparently.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/22 01:29 AM
0

Let's be honest, the issue isn't that women telling their stories are "lying" or being untruthful. The issue is that they're often tacking on a snide generalization at the end talking about how any women in college who would date older men must have "problems" or must be doing it for money. Basically throwing other women (or men) under the bus to prove a point. There's nothing wrong with anecdotes as long as they don't devolve into negative assumptions about anyone who has a different opinion or…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/22 12:18 AM
1

I don't know any statistic that supports the idea that any woman in her early 20s who is fine with dating older men must be a sugar baby or have psychological issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/22 12:11 AM
-1

Lol that's like saying someone who's white wouldn't be arguing against anti-minority racism because only someone who's personally affected would bother to discuss an issue or advocate for a side academically or passionately. You don't have to be in a stereotyped group to understand how a stereotype might be harmful. For the record I'm comfortably far from "middle age," but these kinds of untrue and cheap ad hominems are what make PPD such a aggravating forum for good faith discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 11:20 PM
0

Sure I can understand that preference for matched lifestyle on an anecdotal basis, but the problem is that people love to use broad brush strokes and talk in hyperbole specifically about this topic, when they know full well in any other topic that attraction is actually a very individual thing. It doesn't really move the discussion in a productive direction when people say things like "the only women who date older men are sugar babies/prostitutes/daddy-issue-havers."
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 10:40 PM
1

Lol yeah it seems PPD forgets about nuance whenever the topic of age gaps comes up. A lot of women here especially seem very invested in the idea that men suddenly look like bridge trolls at 30 and easily identifiable by age on sight. Almost like some sort of feel-good rebuttal to "the wall."
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 10:17 PM
5

Obvious logistical question: how would you and your friends even know a guy was 30 as opposed to 25 or something just by looking at him? By definition the ones who look good for their age are going to fly under your radar in terms of you accurately identifying that they're 30+ in the first place. Plus it seems odd to place 30 as the threshold for being physically old-looking in the first place because there are plenty of women around that age who look amazing and I'd bet would be attractive to c…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 09:59 PM
3

Lol seems like you have quite a fatalistic, black and white view of dating and human attraction. If you think a fit 30 yo guy attracting a 22 yo is that big of a stretch from a 27 yo guy dating a 22 yo (quite common actually) then you need to step outside of PPD theory once in a while.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 09:51 PM
10

You're not going to get any honest or unbiased answers asking it in this way, your approach is entirely wrong because age gap discourse is very one-sided on social media so women are going to respond based on on-paper biases and societal stereotypes. It'd be like asking women on Reddit if they were okay with guys approaching them in public, your answers will be heavily skewed. You'd have to do an experiment where women rate the attractiveness of random men that they encounter without knowing the…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 09:40 PM
3

Bruh lmao Briefly skimmed over people's comments before clicking the link and thought "hmm seems reasonable, random bald middle-aged guy is probably mostly attractive to soccer moms and a strong 5 at best." Y'all are delusional if you think the Rock isn't highly desirable to at least 10% of women in any age demographic. Even on looks and physique alone he wouldn't be starving for attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/22 08:14 PM
1

You think one night stands give feedback?!?! Why wouldn't they? Verbal/nonverbal communication during sex doesn't just happen with established couples.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/22 06:30 PM
2

imagine a virgin having sex for the first time, that level of cluelessness is what a pump and dumper has So someone who has lots of casual sex is just as clueless as a virgin? Can't say I agree. Also you'd have to make the assumption that guys who have lots of casual sex are selfish and toxic and don't listen to any of the feedback they're almost certain to get. If both parties have the expectation of NSA sex beforehand then that's not "pump and dump."
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/22 06:16 PM
2

Sure it's not a guarantee that players take anything useful from their ample experience. But if you're trying to learn about what an entire group of people generally likes or responds positively to then it makes more sense to solicit quantity instead of "quality" of opinions so you can notice patterns and correct for personal bias. Of course you can always just ask both guys and consider differing points of view.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/22 05:44 PM
2

If you're going to listen to men, maybe stop listening to the guys who get a NEW woman into their bed each week, and start listening to the guys who manage to get the SAME woman to HAPPILY RETURN to their bed, each week. To be fair the guy who sleeps with multiple women is probably going to have a broader and more representative sample of what women generally like than the guy who sleeps with the one woman and can only speak for that one woman. Also repeat business doesn't mean the woman is even…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/22 05:25 PM
4

Couldn't you just repent on your deathbed and make up for a life of sin and debauchery?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/22 01:38 AM
1

Why would it be especially true in 2022?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/22 01:36 AM
3

I believe the hunger for non-boring partners is very common among people with troubled childhoods. Really? I'm pretty sure this is a fairly common preference regardless of background, not too many people actually enjoy being bored in life much less spending time with boring partners. Even if they know they're benefiting by exchanging excitement for stability (eg UMC housewives with free time). With social media and shortening attention spans this seems to be even more so in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 08:42 PM
4

The definition of "bad" is too nebulous for this conversation I think, but simply having your act together is not sufficient for being attractive at all. That's a basic expectation for a grown adult. There are plenty of guys with a job, car, and a house who are cookie-cutter and boring. You need an "edge" to stand out, and if you're not attractive physically or high social-status then that's where being "bad" comes into play. "Bad" doesn't mean you have to commit felonies and go to prison, but t…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 08:23 PM
1

You don't think men would have already done those things to improve their chances if they were socially acceptable to do?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 08:14 PM
3

I'd imagine that men who have that much trouble dating in real life aren't going to be as willing to share their problems without the benefit of anonymity. So it's usually confined to online spaces. Also I don't think genuinely nice guys would claim they're "morally superior beings" in those words, more like confusion over why niceness isn't an attractive quality. Even though technically being nice IS morally superior to being mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 02:51 AM
3

The fake-nice-guys phenomenon is probably the least controversial view on PPD and I'm sure there's a lot of impostors in real life orbiting unlucky women. That said, on the flip side there's a very smug tendency online to disbelieve anyone who self-describes as a nice guy in the process of trying to diagnose their dating issues, under the assumption that 1) a nice guy would never complain and that 2) calling yourself a nice guy somehow automatically makes you not one by definition. So basically …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 02:09 AM
-1

Oh I thought you meant there's people who think that approaching someone physically standing outside of a club or bar is creepy. Like there's some invisible boundary keeping out the creepiness. I've actually heard that one before lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 01:18 AM
6

Don't believe people when they say approaching women outside of a club or bar is creepy Lol aren't those like the two venues where it's considered socially acceptable to approach women? "Creepy" makes no sense...
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 01:13 AM
1

The only effective way to overcome a fear is to expose yourself to it more often (more than every few months at least). You have to train yourself somehow to try your luck with women on a regular basis and by doing so desensitize yourself to the feeling of getting rejected. Over time you realize that there's no point investing so much in any single outcome because there are plenty of available women out there who don't know your history of rejection. Which means every interaction is a fresh star…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/22 01:06 AM
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