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El_Hombre_Fiero Archive

View 1 post and 257 comments by El_Hombre_Fiero on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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20

How else are they going to write those erotic novels they love so much?
/r/EverydayMisandry24/07/26 04:15 PM
2

That's interesting. I wasn't aware of escort services that are aimed for neurodivergent people. I know that higher-end escorts are more in tune with creating a comfortable environment and know how to make a man feel wanted/desired.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 02:25 PM
3

But if you have reasonably broad interests, you can look at the selection of things you might enjoy, and pick a few that are more even, or that tend to have more women. Right. That's the key. However, many people don't consider demographics when they choose their hobbies and other interests. That is, until they decide to meet people to potentially date. Some things are pretty neutral, such as volunteering. I used to do H4H and also volunteered at an animal shelter (I'm a softie for pets). There …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 02:20 PM
1

What is your profession, if you don't mind me asking? I'm curious how you know your clients would be great partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 11:29 PM
23

Certain hobbies will naturally be segregated. As an example, any video game, table top gaming, or DnD type of group will be made up of a majority of men. The few women there are more than likely dating someone within the group. Conversely, many paint or crafty types of groups will have a lot more women represented.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 11:27 PM
1

There is also a weird standard where doing activities to indirectly find dates is criticized. Like men are discouraged to volunteer, go to a dance class, or join a run club in order to find dates. But I’ve never heard of anyone criticize a man for volunteering, going to a dance class, or joining a run club in order to make friends. Or working a job he doesn’t like in order to make money, not because the job itself is good. There's nothing wrong with going to places where it's socially acceptable…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 11:23 PM
-1

I agree. Men deciding what standards are reasonable for women reminds me of men who are like "my girl's gotta be 5'2, double D, 24 inch waist, no body hair, etc." There's a difference between standards and expectations. Standards are what you'd place on those whom you are already attracting. For example, are they a good person, do they treat others well, are they family-oriented, do our values align, etc.? Saying that a man needs to make X amount of money, needs to be a certain height, needs to …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:55 AM
2

What's the definition of a good, bad, and worse partner? And who is the arbiter of that definition?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:28 AM
3

I didn’t know dating asked for forcing guys to say they just want casual and then not put any effort into conversing with women. Tell me how did dating apps do that? My metaphor was more about the apps using deceptive tactics to get you to spend money. For example, putting your like/message on the bottom of a woman's pile, such that your profile/message may never been seen unless you pay to have your messages be top priority. Again, I cannot control how other men behave on the apps. I can only c…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 10:00 PM
3

Most people (men and women) sign up for the apps because there are advertisements, articles and whatnot saying that dating apps are the most popular and/or standardized way people are dating today. It's not like the apps tell you, "Hey, there are currently 1000 women and 5000 men on this dating app. The top 50% of women have an average of 2000 likes/messages each. May the odds be ever in your favor". A lot of men would immediately reconsider in that case. Some of the women that I've dated have s…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 09:11 PM
2

I just explained it, but I understand its just easier to have a victim complex than actually be desirable and liked by others. You didn't really explain anything. You pointed to one model-looking guy's experience with the way he uses dating apps. You also gave some pointers on which apps work better, which is largely irrelevant, since men will encounter the same experiences in all dating apps. Having an understanding on the way the apps work and their limitations is a far cry from victim complex…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 08:15 PM
5

Your first three paragraphs are referring to dating apps. You cannot say that men are the problem, especially when referring to the dating apps. There are a lot of factors involved. As an individual man, I cannot control the gender imbalance that occurs on the apps. I cannot control where the app puts my likes/messages in relation to other ones a woman receives. I also cannot control the swipe patterns of other men nor the way they behave (e.g., two-faced when it comes to serious or casual). I a…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 07:30 PM
5

Dating apps are convenient. However, that convenience comes with some negatives, one of which is it draws in low-effort people. It's very rare to encounter women on a dating app that has the whole package (e.g., looks, personality, no baggage or children). Women like that tend to use dating apps for a short period before they pair up with someone and get off the app. You're then left with less desirable women and/or women who are only using the app for validation or social media followers. On th…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 06:39 PM
21

Sometimes Instagram will suggest reels that friends have liked or commented on. If your friends make comments on the reels you visit, their comments will appear at the top. That's probably how she saw your comment. There may be some truth that if you give a sex-deprived person a way to be sexually fulfilled, they might decide not to rape someone. However, there is an element of control and fear involved with rape. Some believe that the desire to hurt the other is the main motivator for rape, suc…
/r/EverydayMisandry07/07/26 07:51 PM
0

Did you miss where I wrote that they will struggle when their visions are not aligned? If they agree with everything 100% of the time, then yeah, they're golden. That's an ideal situation, though. In my example, you can view the CEO as the head of household, and the shareholders as the rest of the family (spouse and/or children). They all have a say in family matters, but the final decision lies with the CEO, because he/she will be the one responsible if things go wrong. As such, the rest of the…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 04:57 PM
1

The reason why there were women-only scholarships was to encourage more women to go to college so that there would be equal representation. If there are a significant number of women-only scholarships and the other scholarships are free-for-all, I think it's fair for young men to speak up about that. Especially if women outnumber men in terms of college enrollment.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 04:50 PM
8

Guarantee you if that there were scholarships targeted to only men, women would complain about discrimination.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 08:55 AM
2

Isn't that the problem that people have today? Women leaning on biology when it suits them? Yes, women go through pregnancies and also menopause. If they want equality, then men should have equivalent benefits. If women are going to take off X amount of time per year due to biology, then men should be given the option to have that same time off.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 08:54 AM
1

A business is more difficult to run when you have two CEOs, particularly when they encounter positions where they are not aligned. There will be a lot more disagreements as a result. It's much more efficient if you have one CEO who makes decisions with support of those around him/her. A long term relationship and/or family can be seen like a growing business. When it comes to relationships, in general, men fill in the leadership role and handle the pressure and responsibility that comes with tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 06:04 AM
1

I've always been drawn to relationship dynamics, especially after having overcome my own insecurities and shortcomings. I think that's what keeps me here. I like to think that we can help some of those who are struggling with dating and/or have trouble understanding the opposite sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:55 AM
3

The true value of dating apps is that you know everyone on them has romantic intentions. When you meet others in the wild, you're less likely to encounter those who are open to date. They might already be taken or they're just not in the right frame of mind to flirt or be flirted with. That being said, you're right in that if you're well-rounded and have a great personality, but aren't genetically blessed (e.g., >6', muscular frame/face), you'll have fewer opportunities on the apps. You won't be…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 01:00 AM
1

Hypothetically, would you have gone on those 100+ dates if you didn't think you could find an overall match at the end of it? A good relationship is worth the time/energy investment. There's no such thing as perfection when it comes to an individual. None of us are perfect. However, many of us are good enough fits that going through countless dates is worth finding one that fits our lives. When people (mainly women) say that a mate needs to have X, Y, and Z superficial qualities, they're essenti…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:26 AM
-1

No one needs a woman either, but that's not the point. When you're seeking a relationship, you're by default wanting a man/woman. When you require a perfect match between the two of you, you end up making it statistically impossible for a relationship to ever form.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 02:42 PM
2

It could be age-dependent. Fresh out of high-school/college, most men won't care too much about income because they likely don't have a lot of income themselves. However, once you start talking about established men who have assets and are looking for marriage/long-term relationships, it starts to become more of a consideration. Even then, I don't think the income alone is what's important to most men. What they really care about is whether she's financially responsible. A woman can make $100k b…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 05:03 AM
–

Plenty of women voted for him. Doesn't mean that they support a rapist. They support the policies of a man who just happened to be accused of rape.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 02:49 AM
5

Sorry about your experience, but seeing your initial post with the follow-up cracked me up.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 04:32 PM
1

While that can give you a slight advantage, you'd have to live in those areas, though. That way, you appear as tall or taller compared to the average height there.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 04:31 PM
2

If there are absolute dealbreakers with regards to that answer, I'd rather she ask me those questions prior to the first date. That way, I'm not wasting her time nor mine on a date that will lead to nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 04:28 PM
1

She'd have to be more specific. Are we talking about intelligence, success, looks, strength? Like others mentioned, it sounds like an interview question where the asker is expecting you to answer in the way they want. Very inorganic, especially on a first date.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 04:25 PM
1

Speed dating- Probably the best option offline. Pretty much any legitimate speed dating event would try and get the gender ratio as even as possible, however the vast majority of women would go in groups, often with friends who are already in a relationship, so even if there are slightly more women, the actual ratio of single men and women is closer to 65:35, which is about the same as what it is on the apps. I've had some success with speed dating. However, I have had a chance to peek behind th…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 06:32 AM
3

Nope. I don't want any woman to get abused or raped, regardless of who they end up with. However, who she chooses to spend time with is on her. If she overlooks signs of potential abuse (e.g., anger issues), she shares some blame for staying in a dangerous situation. I'd say the same for men who choose to stay with women who display anger issues and/or who downplay physical responses, such as slapping him. If he eventually takes a bat to the skull, I'd expect him to realize that he should have l…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 02:11 PM
2

I never said that a woman should keep a bad man. What she should do is recognize that he is bad early on and avoid dealing with him. That way, rape and abuse are less likely to occur in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:49 AM
11

Although some women are taken advantage of, no women is going to admit that she went for the hot player, knowing that she did not have the attributes to keep such a man. As such, it is difficult to conclude that people are victim blaming female victims.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 03:41 AM
3

Just because you receive attention doesn’t mean that’s why you’re dressing that way. Conversely, one must understand that when you dress a certain way, you are drawing a certain type of attention. You might not WANT to draw sexual attention towards yourself. However, if you are wearing tight clothing and/or accentuating certain features, you are drawing attention towards features that are considered sexually alluring. You have to accept that.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:57 AM
2

I agree with this. Great comment. With regards to the top X% of men/women, I'm curious if this is where Bumble is planning to implement AI. To me, that would solve a lot of problems with OLD. Instead of letting individuals (incorrectly) determine their dating/relationship value, an AI can objectively pair people with others on the same attractiveness level. This evades the FOMO that people get when they are shown others that are otherwise never going to be an option for them. For example, if you…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 11:34 PM
2

OLD tends to draw a lot of low-effort types. You'll have undesirable people on both sides hoping to strike gold while doing the absolute minimum to attract someone else. Sometimes it's because they don't know how to showcase themselves. Oftentimes, it's because there is not much to showcase. From a man's perspective, you'll see a lot of physically unattractive women, single mothers, broke women, self-centered women. Prior to OLD, women like that got little attention from men. As such, they would…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 11:19 PM
0

Thumbs me up so we can spread the word. What you do in your bedroom is none of our business.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 10:51 PM
19

Prime example of a woman allergic to accountability. All she has to do is agree that women also have to vet their potential mates properly. Any reasonable person would agree with that. However, that means that she cannot solely blame the men for her failed relationships and she cannot have that.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 10:50 PM
–

I can see that. I would assume that a lot of those men are freshly redpilled experiencing red pill rage. I know for me, I complained a lot early on before I started making changes to improve my position in the dating realm.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 04:03 PM
–

As a woman, you might not notice pushback as much as most men have. Ask any man who has stated his preference for fitter/thinner women on his dating profile. Odds are, he got a lot of matches from women whose sole intention was to tell him he was wrong for stating that preference. Worse case scenario, they report him for fatphobia, which would result in his profile being deleted. I'm not talking about something crass like "no fat chicks". It can be as innocent as stating you'd like to find someo…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 03:59 PM
–

Whining doesn't really solve anything. If you want to identify areas where you can improve to attract better options, that's one thing. However, if all you do is complain that you're not getting the same outcomes as more attractive people, you're just going to annoy others.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 03:11 AM
–

Isn't OP's point that society shames one sex when stating their preferences but applauds it with the other sex states the same preference? If a woman says she prefers a fit guy, people generally applaud her for knowing what she wants. If a man says he prefers a thinner woman, people usually make negative assumptions and try to shame him out of those preferences. Why don't we applaud him for knowing what he wants?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 03:08 AM
2

Isn't that expensive and/or a lengthy process? I doubt someone would go through all that trouble only to terminate the pregnancy after finding out it was going to be a boy.
/r/EverydayMisandry21/05/26 02:16 PM
6

It depends on whether that extra education/income/status takes away from a pleasant demeanor. I'd much rather date/marry a pleasant housekeeper versus a stressed/combative doctor.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 02:24 PM
2

Future doctors and engineers.
/r/EverydayMisandry11/05/26 02:46 PM
5

Is it really that difficult to believe that someone can be super hot, but you know for a fact that they would not make for a good long-term partner? As such, you'd only consider sleeping with them and nothing more. On that same vein, the qualities you look for a long-term partner are going to be different compared to someone that you're just hooking up with. The bar for physical attraction is lowered compared to other characteristics you'd need from a long-term mate.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 03:45 PM
1

I think most women would've hookup with their husbands. Plenty of women have admitted that they'll have "fun" with hot guys and then settle down with someone who is safer. Her future husband may not be as hot and/or exciting as the men she's hooked up with. Doesn't mean that she isn't attracted to him, but more so that she wouldn't JUST hook up with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 07:26 PM
2

To me, marriage establishes the intent to start a life-lasting relationship with the intent to raise a family together. Women who are wifey material know the value of stability and raising a family together with her man. They have less of a selfish mindset and value building a strong family unit. There's an inherent commitment mindset. Most marriage-minded men would treasure such a woman. If family and stability is something that you value, then that would be why you'd want to be wife material. …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 07:23 PM
9

Also the "Discussing the numbers makes you part of the problem"...Haha no. If you deliberately misinterpret an article to try to justify hatred against half of the population, you deserve to be called out. If anything, those who cling to the "62 million men" number make it worse for everyone. They're essentially obfuscating the actual bad actors, which then makes it a needle in a haystack situation.
/r/EverydayMisandry20/04/26 09:23 PM
1

I'd say there's a difference between falling for someone you're already friends with and someone that you pursued with romantic intent. I wouldn't suggest throwing away an already established friendship if they don't reciprocate romantic interest. A little distance might be necessary to avoid complicating things. However, if you ask someone out and after a few dates they suggest friendship, I would say it's better to cut the losses. The dynamic is already thrown off. From their point of view, th…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 04:40 PM
0

I've seen that article before many years ago. I agreed with it then and I still do. I'd argue that harsh truths like that tend to be more red pilled than not, though. Number 4 even gives an example of demonstrating value to be successful in dating (as well as in life). Most BP advice tends to shy away from that kind of advice because it can be manipulative.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 04:11 PM
1

I don't know what the algorithms feed you. It's possible you see different types of RP content creators. Some of them are scummy and give terrible advice. I'm more the studious type. Reading RP books and testimonials helped me understand how to improve better than watching a bunch of people talking about random stuff. I'm also not into cheap sex, so that could have altered how I approach RP. Again, different types of RP folks. To be specific depends on the scenario. A general one that is RP-code…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 05:50 PM
3

By control, I mean control of their destiny. You touched up on things that can help (e.g., develop social skills, learning how to be an interesting person). However, there should still be some practical advice there as well. HOW would you suggest someone develop their social skills? That's where RP advice tends to be more appealing to men. It's a bit more descriptive about what works and why it works. If a woman were seeking someone to fall in love with, marry, and have children with, and she sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 02:33 AM
1

To me, it depends on both people's backgrounds. I'll stop here and say that we agree to disagree. Enjoy the weekend.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 11:41 PM
1

My example was where one side has traditions and/or cultural beliefs around taking last names. There's nothing wrong with having strong ties to your last name, especially if your family name has a legacy. Wanting to keep your and/or your family identify is a valid reason to not change your last name.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 10:44 PM
1

I can see in-person PUA classes helping tremendously, especially if you're a little shy/nervous. If you have someone to coach you, you can get over that initial hump. After that, you have a little more confidence to do it on your own.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 10:36 PM
1

It should be a discussion between both future husband and wife prior to deciding to marry. To me, there is room for cultural and traditional norms. In many Hispanic cultures, people hyphenate their last names. Ideally, the husband and wife would both be in alignment ahead of time without a discussion. However, if the wife feels strongly about keeping her last name for whatever reason and she can articulate why without it being a "my way or the highway" response, then I think it's fair for a reas…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 07:35 PM
-1

Does it count if it is a woman giving "No BS" advice? One of the top videos when I searched on YT was this one: 21 Years of No BS Dating Advice For Men In 25 Minutes - #1 Wing Girl Tells All I stole this from one of the comments: 1:19 #1- Display attractive personality traits (eg confidence) independent of on-paper qualities like credential/wealth/status 4:12 #2- Women prefer meeting men in real life (vs dating apps) 5:58 #3- Even if a woman’s interested, be ready for a five-minute conversation …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 07:29 PM
1

Some people want cheat codes. However, I'd argue a larger number of people want practical advice with some success rate. They want some control over their situation. People (men especially) get tired of hearing the same tropes (e.g., "just be yourself", "the right one will show up eventually"). Someone can take that advice and remain exactly with the same nonexistent love life years later.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 07:21 PM
3

For long-term relationships, there are usually conditions that must be met prior to mutually enjoying each other's company.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 10:07 PM
0

In some ways, shit tests make sense. Women would prefer to be with men who aren't easily manipulated. Such a man is less likely to cheat, for instance.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/26 03:17 PM
1

In theory, it invokes a competitive mindset, where the subject feels they must overcome not meeting someone's standards. There's an art to it. If you come off too strong, you'll be seen as an asshole (like you mention in your OP). If you are clever enough, you can blur the lines of teasing/flirting. Women effectively do this as well, btw. An example of that is any time they say something like "a real man would..."
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/26 03:13 PM
0

What you see is not what's available to you, though. I think that's the message that young women will have to understand. I would give the same advice to men who say they can only be attracted to women who looked like Sydney Sweeney. Unless the man is uber attractive himself, he's probably not going to find a woman that attractive who is also willing to commit to him. Sure, you can remain single. That will always be an option. However, if building a family or having a supportive partner is impor…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/26 03:07 AM
–

I was hoping me writing that would trigger you to use the internet and realize that it isn't the young loser, single men consuming porn/OF at mass levels. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-022-02329-0 A sizable number of the OF/porn consumers are married men. So, there are more single men going out there and socializing and not saying home to jerk off.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 04:59 PM
0

Aren't married men the biggest consumers of porn / OF?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 08:36 PM
3

We're not all attracted to the same thing. However, if you were to take a poll of random men, you'll likely notice some trends. Trends that you can use to your advantage, if your goal is to increase your dating pool. The bigger your dating pool, the odds are better that you can find someone who has both the physical and emotional qualities that you want in a mate. Or you can wait for the exception (aka, the man who loves you as-is). However, that man might not be as attractive as you'd like him …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 07:24 PM
1

To me, it depends on what the topic is and whether you want speculation or something that is more truthful/practical. I think in your previous post, your question was specifically about women attracting the men they want. I'll repeat my comment here: Who can better put themselves into the mindset of the attractive men you want? Men? Or other women? Imagine you're an average gal and your standards are X. If you were to put yourself into the body of Sydney Sweeney (or any other highly attractive w…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 07:14 PM
-1

If you want a relationship, you'll have to compromise at some point. If you're looking for perfection, you'll never get a relationship. At least not a deep, meaningful, long-lasting one.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 10:17 PM
1

Who can better put themselves into the mindset of the attractive men you want? Men? Or other women? Imagine you're an average gal and your standards are X. If you were to put yourself into the body of Sydney Sweeney (or any other highly attractive woman), odds are your standards will increase. Surely, you wouldn't date the same caliber of man as an average gal versus a highly attractive one. As an average guy, I know what I want and I know what I can attract in general. I know that if I struck g…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 08:46 PM
1

Ah. So they are assholes who are mad they dont get pussy. Someone who actually has a soul would just give sympathy to abuse victims. Someone who passionately cares about abuse victims would know that a large portion of victims were also victims of childhood abuse. However, an insecure prick deserving to be called for his Napoleon/LDE complex would react with "If she didn't want to fuck Chad, she wouldn't have been punched in the face". You can have sympathy for someone while still holding them a…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 06:27 PM
4

Not according to this subreddit. The majority of guys here still cant figure out the problem here: https://youtube.com/shorts/_ke-Ep2Gu1E?si=5gy2eVeTDGPKPhXr That is a dick move. You can address that with a lot more tact. Not sure how seriously people should be taking those "pop the balloon" type of shows, though. Obviously, they're going to be exaggerated because that gets the most views. They why the fuck would they care that some asshole gets pussy? They don't care that those assholes get pus…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 05:01 PM
5

I do, and this sub still thinks Im sexist. Just like they think women want men to be gay because they want me to be respectful to trans women. Who is "they"? And do you mean "me" or "men" to be respectful to trans women? Men can be respectful of trans women. However, a line is crossed if you suggest men should consider trans women equivalent to biological women in the dating realm. For example, if he goes around bitching about Chad, its easy to assume he’s insecure about something. And typically…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 04:29 PM
7

If someone is being an asshole, what's wrong with just calling them an asshole? Why insult something that is irrelevant to them being an asshole? Some insecure people might fall for body shaming tactics and shut up. However, you still didn't win any arguments doing that. You also appear like a bully doing that. No one really likes bullies.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 04:09 PM
14

You shouldn't bother. OP just wants to justify being able to insult men, regardless of whether it is sexist or body shaming.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 03:34 PM
3

And I personally believe the country would be better. Politicians would be much more mindful before we started international conflicts. If you had to have skin in the game, even the rich people would hold each other accountable and would put more pressure on the government to be responsible with the money. You'd still want some advocacy for underrepresented groups, of course. However, at a fundamental level, people would vote for the best of their country and people first and foremost.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 04:52 PM
3

To me, it depends. Hypothetically, there could be a vote on us going to war. If women are the ones staying away from any conflict (i.e., there is no risk they will be fighting and losing their lives), should they vote on that? I would say no. Then again, I'm also of the mindset that unless you are a net tax payer, you shouldn't have a say in where those taxes go.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 03:21 PM
3

Men and women are different, though. Men tend to be bigger/stronger, and women give birth. So, protections towards women is seeing them as someone worth protecting. To me, that isn't seeing them as less capable.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 03:20 AM
1

Is it really a motherhood penalty? While the mother cares for the child, she's not going to be able to continue her job the same as before. The best policy we can do is keep the position saved for her return. However, there may be opportunities missed as she was away from work. It's not really a penalty, just reality. The same were to happen if a man took paternity leave and focused on family instead of the career during that time. Just because it happens to women more doesn't mean we have to "c…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 10:00 PM
3

There are levels to it. I would compare it to wealth in general. Of the following, who would you assume are "good" people: Top 0.1% of wealthy (e.g., Bezos, Musk)? Top 10% of wealthy (e.g., doctors, lawyers)? Top 25% of wealthy (e.g., entrepreneurs, small/family business owners)? Remaining wealthy (e.g., average salary earners)? I would bet good money that most people would assume that the top 0.1% of people are greedy and selfish and are generally not good people, especially if you want to star…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 08:29 PM
4

It's somewhat taboo, but there is something to be said about dating in your relative socio-economic level. Doing so helps with avoiding unspoken expectations from any financial imbalance. Upbringing also plays a role, but that's tougher to filter before dating someone. As a professional myself, I tend to date professional women as well. At the very least someone who is career-minded (e.g., teachers, doctors, lawyers). Now, I'm generous, so I don't mind paying for first dates. Usually my dates ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 10:15 PM
1

What does that have to do with my statement? It's in relation to your OP. You're discussing men feeling used in the dating realm, and I'm relating it to women feeling used in the dating realm. If a woman is not attracted to a guy but continues to date him, she's using him. Same thing with a man giving a woman the impression he wants something serious with her, only to bounce once they have sex. You mentioned women can choose not to sleep with someone early. On that same vein, men can opt for ine…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 08:25 PM
5

Which is why most women DONT fuck guys that early. Sure, however if you know you're not attracted to him, you're still wasting the man's time and money if you accept subsequent dates. Or the guy can just not do what you said in the first paragraph. That is also true. I think a lot of young men are still adjusting to today's dating climate.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 06:56 PM
13

Nobody wants to be taken advantage of. The men who complain about being used for resources are the ones who spend upwards of $100 on first dates in the hopes to impress the women to continue dating him. Oftentimes, those men do not have hundreds of dollars worth of disposable income and/or they want to be deliberate when dating. To have those women flake feels like wasted time, money, and effort. It's no different than women who sleep with a guy and then feel used when he pulls away or ghosts. W…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 06:29 PM
2

Any complaint such as "This is difficult for me to get and I want someone to give it to me." is lazy and annoying. No one wants to hear that, man or woman. When it comes to things you want, you'll never get it by complaining. Further, sex requires another willing participant. Complaining about a lack of sex places an implicit blame on others for not giving it to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 06:55 PM
5

To me, premature ejaculation discussions came off as "it's relatively easy to get men off. Therefore, it is a 'skill' to last longer". Now that I've read your post, it does seem like another way for men to be seen as faulty women.
/r/EverydayMisandry19/12/25 09:01 PM
37

A guy can't even ask for some appreciation on the day he gets married. Everything is misogyny or patriarchy. lol
/r/EverydayMisandry18/12/25 11:21 PM
–

Men get tired of and cheat on their beautiful girlfriends all the time, that's true. Some men might, I'll give you that. I'd say those men are never satisfied with what they have and always desire more. Some of us men have a hard enough time keeping up with one woman, let alone two or more. lol
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 10:52 PM
1

There's nothing to really fix, per se. We're just reaching an equilibrium in terms of dating/mating. In general, women are not accepting what most men are bringing to the table. On the other hand, some men are able to get more out of it (e.g., more casual sex, more relationships). The result is an increasing number of single mothers and an increasing number of sexless/struggling men.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 10:49 PM
–

As the saying goes, regardless of how hot she is, someone out there is tired of her shit. If a woman is good to me, I'll return the favor. However, if she acts up for too long, then out the door she goes.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 10:31 PM
–

Once you're in a relationship, your actions/behaviors will drive how your man treats you versus just your looks. I've been with baddies who started acting bratty a few months in. Doesn't matter how hot she was, that was enough of a turn off for me to end things with them. I will say that in the dating stage, your looks will play a bigger role in how hard a man tries to court you. In my case, I treat all dates well. There's a baseline standard. However, if she's more my type, I will try a little …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 10:00 PM
3

I imagine having slept with a few men (not sure of an exact number, but let's say 10), a woman might figure that sex with men just isn't worth it. This is especially true if she's not getting her needs met from men (aka orgasm gap). So, she can just rely on toys for the remainder of her sex life and still have a fruitful life outside of sex/relationships. In other words, she can consider herself "over it" when it comes to sex. Conversely, although he can meet his needs on his own, a struggling m…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 09:52 PM
3

Do those pick me achieve something? Like jealous of what? They get the outcome they desire. They get picked.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 03:44 PM
1

Seems like a losing strategy. That's like a poor person asking wealthy people to not show off their wealth. It's not as if pickme's will stop being a pickme. And it's not like men who go for pickme's will suddenly stop going for them. Same thing with men who want simps to stop simping. You're never going to alter behavior by calling it out. If a woman is not a pickme, then she should just avoid men who expect pickme behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 05:04 PM
3

If everyone jumps off a bridge, does that mean you should as well? Plenty of men spend their entire paychecks spoiling women. Just because some women start to expect that sort of behavior from men doesn't mean that every man has to follow suit. On that same note, women do not have to give away anything if they don't want to.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 04:42 PM
6

I wonder how much that guy made selling women a dream.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 02:02 AM
19

Women might say that they're not jealous of a pick-me, but the constant belittling/attacking does come off as jealous. It's as if women are worried that pick-mes make them look bad in the dating market. Remember “Men dont commit to whores”, but also “Dont withhold sex from men because it shows you dont find them attractive”. Thing is if a woman keeps trying to impress men with immediate sex, that’s gonna lead to alot of pump and dumps, which means a longer sexual history that men allegedly dont …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 01:49 AM
3

Ideally, you would have had some idea that that person was interested in you before asking them. That way you can avoid being in a bind. Since you've already asked one, you can try asking some of the other people in the social circle if they know anyone who is single and looking and/or if they don't mind being a wingman/wingwoman for you on a future outing. Word gets around in social circles and you risk causing rifts between others. For example, if you asked out another woman from the social gr…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 01:18 AM
20

He didn't flash her. She peeked and saw more than she should have.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 01:04 AM
10

Where did people get this idea that vasectomies are reversible? I know it's possible, but there's no guarantee that you can successfully reverse one.
/r/EverydayMisandry28/11/25 07:05 PM
21

He might be kindhearted, high earning, intelligent and/or have other qualities that would make for a good long-term mate/father.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/25 06:41 PM
3

Definitely agree with your header. If you told women to approach men to date, they'd only shoot for the top X% of men anyway. A lot of frustrated men assume that those women will "come to their senses" and date men on their level. That's not going to happen. Those frustrated women would much rather remove themselves from the dating pool altogether than date men on their level.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 07:06 AM
7

BUT ask any man what he thinks of a girl that gave him sex freely and he will really treasure the experience and respect the women I'd have to disagree with you, there. When a woman gives up sex freely, the man treasures the sex. He then chooses to continue engaging with the woman in order to have more sex. He may or may not respect her. I agree with you that some women try to please a man (usually through lots of sex) with the hope that he will eventually commit. Once a woman starts to pressure…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/25 06:42 AM
1

There are general attractiveness markers. If you and your female friends were each tasked with finding the 10 hottest and 10 least attractive men in a bar/club, there is likely going to be a lot of overlap between your selections. Sure. Someone's 7 might be another's 6 or 8. However, they're likely not going to rate them that far off (e.g., a 3).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/25 04:15 AM
1

For every prosperous guy, there are 10+ women after him, many of whom are not prosperous. And unfortunately, not many men are disciplined enough to properly vet a woman before taking her on. I had to turn away women who came with too much baggage (e.g., debt, children from past relationships, mental issues) for my liking.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/25 04:02 AM
2

In their defense, it's better to aim high and miss than it is to aim low and regret what you caught.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/25 09:50 PM
1

Because I'm expected to initiate, I can easily avoid women that aren't up to my standards. Women have to play more defense in the dating game. Doesn't really surprise me that they want more of a say in terms of who gets to sexualize them.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 11:46 PM
–

Sure, some men show anger in the comments. However, those men are angry/upset at their situation in life. They might blame women's hypergamy for them missing out on sex/love, but that doesn't mean they want to be assholes towards any potential girlfriend/wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 05:33 PM
4

They're using "hit" as in "smash" or "bang". Not an abusive hit.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:40 PM
12

Why would anyone WANT to be an asshole, especially with someone you want to get into a relationship with? Act like an asshole towards your friends and you lose said friends almost immediately. Being an asshole is a lonely and miserable life. OP assumes that incel men want to mistreat women, when that can't be further from the truth.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:26 PM
–

You'll never be able to get women to rate themselves objectively (i.e., with the men they desire in mind). You'll have obese/unattractive women saying that they are 10/10 because men who are 8+/10 are willing to sleep with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/25 09:16 AM
2

I don't necessarily see it as those highly attractive men are purposely playing women. What is more likely is that women bend over backwards to try to appease those men, hoping to get commitment. Meanwhile, those men do not try to quell those women's romantic expectations. As a result, the relationship goes nowhere as the man is just enjoying the attention/sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/25 04:47 PM
2

If I have a good thing going for me, I don't stray. I never faked my behavior while in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 04:05 PM
2

Someone who cheats on you will likely rationalize cheating on you again. Why take that risk by taking them back? If the options are to forgive and commit to a cheating ex or remain single, I think most reasonable men would remain single.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 05:21 AM
3

It's generally accepted that a man who is dating a woman out of his league will try harder to keep her happy to maintain the relationship. A few times, I dated women who I thought I never had a chance with. Best believe that I was on my best behavior and went above and beyond to stay on their good side.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/25 03:39 AM
1

The definition of "treating badly" is going to vary from woman to woman. This can range from ghosting/being ignored to "he used me for sex". I've gone on dates with average/less attractive women and never treated them badly. I usually at least go on one date to see if we vibe. If there is no connection, then I let them know that there will not be a subsequent date. Some made it difficult to turn down (e.g., " how come you don't want to see me again?"), but I never treated them poorly. Now, if I'…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/25 06:39 AM
1

Also for both gender: if you decide to quit the dating market, you don't need to do an announcement. This is not an airport But then they won't know that they're missing out on someone who is oh so special! /s
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 09:59 PM
–

Of course, that is something you find out as you're dating. However, your OP implies that you can overcome sexual incompatibilities beyond the dating phase.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 01:22 AM
–

What about libido? If you're high-libido and dating someone who's low-libido, that's going to cause frustration. You'll have to convince yourself to accept sex on a less frequent basis than you'd like. That's already an incompatibility. As far as fetishes, it's one thing to find someone open to trying it with you. It's another to find someone who is enthusiastic about it. Personally, I'd rather be with the latter than the former. I don't want to feel like I'm forcing someone to try something whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 12:59 AM
1

I go on Tinder to find women to date. I'm not a charity. I'm not opposed to a transactional relationship. However, it should never be with someone who is doing it out of desperation. Offering your place in exchange for sex is an easy way to lose your domicile when she reports you to the police for "abuse".
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:53 AM
1

You cannot use the word "literal" and then claim what you wrote is a metaphor.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 07:56 AM
1

Women also have to realize that if they are interested in getting into a long-term relationship, they need to compete with men with have a fruitful single life as well as men who are able to sleep around.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 07:35 AM
–

Some women are highly desirable to wife up, even if they are not going to win any beauty contests. It's about the overall attractiveness of the woman, which includes her mindset towards long-term relationships. A man could find an "Instagram baddie" that is into him. However, she might not be someone worth committing to, especially if she's the type to expect certain behaviors out of men (e.g., pay for my babysitting fees).
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 05:32 AM
1

Isn't that the same as the "boyfriend vs husband" argument though? A certain subset of people are going to be good short-term lovers by not good long-term mates. It's not sexual oppression to understand that someone who has slept around and/or has a lax view of sex is not going to be a good long-term mate. You don't need to meet the same standards that you set for a long-term mate. Otherwise, broke women would never be able to date anyone other than broke men.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 04:05 AM
–

These people need to feel reassured/safe. It starts with a background check. Who is to say that they won't constantly keep tabs on you throughout the relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 04:43 PM
–

She might be the type of woman to install tracking software on your phone, "for her safety".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 02:34 PM
0

Sure, I'm only referring to how they're perceived online/social media, where people are quick to justify when women cheat.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 04:00 AM
5

It's a common trope. Not sure how you're on this sub and have never heard it. Man cheats, he's a selfish pig, bastard, can't keep it in his pants, etc. Woman cheats, the bf/husband did or didn't do something to make her want to cheat.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 06:08 PM
6

...men who tell other men that they are inherently violent You've made this group up. No one says this. The prisons were built to keep prisoners. In no case was it said that the prisons were built for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 02:32 PM
2

We understand violence and where it might stem from, but that doesn't mean we're teaching that men are inherently violent.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 02:12 PM
0

That's fair. I agree that some women think they were basically slaves in the past. It is interesting, though, that articles like that can be published without any major pushback. Not from the editors and not from the readers. Someone else mentioned that an academic wrote an article countering the article's points, but no major backlash. Perhaps men need to be a little more vocal about opposing these kinds of views being shared online/on media. There's almost complicit agreement when there is no …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 02:06 PM
-3

It's white knighting when he's the one who isn't going to "quit trying to make it work and do my part" meanwhile his wife will not have that same mindset.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 01:48 PM
6

By that logic, with more and more men placing blame on women for their lack of success in the world, is society going to be okay with men venting their frustrations through media? Or is that going to be immediately shut down because "men are inherently violent" and giving these men a voice is a "danger to society"?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 01:45 PM
1

If that's the case, then the advice "don't worry, you still have plenty of time" is counterintuitive.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 03:01 PM
1

I think we're saying the same thing. If a woman wants children, she will prioritize them. I'm only stating that the advice "don't worry, you still have plenty of time for kids" should be modified to add some sense of urgency if you're giving that advice to older women. Otherwise, you may give her a false sense of hope and she will end up missing out on that milestone.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 12:46 AM
1

I never said women have to have kids. However, if a woman wants to have kids, especially within a healthy relationship, she has a limited time window to achieve that.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 10:20 PM
1

I'd say it's bad advice to say that and leave it there. At a certain point, you cannot just be passive about life's opportunities. You still have SOME time, and you should be proactive and move with a purpose to make the most of that time you have available.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 03:50 PM
6

I don't think men assume that sex is a reward for being nice. Men are looking for love/romance/intimacy and they just want advice that can actually work to achieve that. More often than not, young men end up at a brick wall when it comes to dating and people keep giving them empty platitudes and useless advice like "just respect women". That doesn't work when it comes to attracting women. After being frustrated that the advice doesn't work, they'll reach a point where they start hating/dehumaniz…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/25 04:16 AM
2

It's a glass half-full/empty situation. One way to look at it is that they only value your traits first and foremost and not you as a person. The other way to look at it is that they admire that you have additional traits on top of what they're looking for. Whether I continue to date this person depends on how I met them. If they reached out to me on social media out of the blue, I'd probably be hesitant and likely call things off. However, if I was the one that approached them first, then I thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 04:19 AM
1

I wasn't suggesting nagging as a way to dismiss it. Usually when someone says that someone nags, it's about nagging in general. Some women do complain about a lot of things. And not everything can be important enough for the partner to notice and address. I say that as someone who dated a gal with a short temper. I learned that certain things she complained about were more important than others. Those were the things I would make sure were taken care of to avoid confrontations.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 11:16 PM
1

Let's ignore the ultimatum aspect of it. If there are things that are high in the priority of things that need to be addressed, that is important information to convey. What you consider highly irritating might just be a slight inconvenience to your SO. And your SO might not know how important it is unless you let them know. If you just nag them about it, they might see it as you overreacting to something trivial. However, if you let them know that it is a high stressor for you, then they will m…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 09:28 PM
4

That shows he doesnt give a fuck about her feelings. That's the kind of black and white thinking that causes you to overreact. I've seen women complain about the bf/husband leaving the dishes out for a day or so and having that build resentment. He knows he will get them done by the next day, but she has it in her head that he doesn't care about her because he doesn't clean them right away. That's where a lot of the problems arise. It's up to her to communicate that it's important that dishes ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 08:45 PM
4

If it is something that will get on your nerves enough such that you will want to end the relationship, then you should let your SO know that. Otherwise, they might not see the behavior as much a problem as you do. Then you end up building resentment over it.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 08:26 PM
13

Sure, there are guys who miss warning signs. There are also guys who are blindsided when his gf/wife breaks up with him out of the blue, only to find her with another guy within a month. You know one guy like that misses warning signs. Do you think the majority of men are like that? Can you leave room for the possibility that a gf/wife would rather fake being happy to keep the benefits of being in the relationship until she decides to call things off?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 08:23 PM
1

There's no need to get defensive. All I'm saying is that, in this modern era, it could be beneficial for both men and women to show what a healthy initial romantic encounter looks like. Especially one that results in a rejection. And it cannot be the opposite of what the pick-up artists showed years ago to sell courses. That is, they cannot just have actors playing some ideal scenario in a studio.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 09:21 PM
1

BP didn't have a manual, per se. However, there used to be social etiquette about men's and women's roles when it came to dating/courting. For example, how to approach and/or signal that you want to be approached how to accept rejection and/or how to turn someone down gently Those kinds of social norms were taught to us by our elders and were understood by most people. We don't really teach that today. We're all expected to just try and hope for the best. We tell young men to make the first move…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 07:06 PM
15

It's more so that women hear: "You're not going to get the tall, rich, handsome men to commit to you. So, choose someone closer to your level and make the most of that relationship." After pondering for a second, women will then say: "Well, I don't want to do that, so stop telling me to do that."
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 08:44 PM
1

A few women in my past used therapy speech as a shield from criticism. On occasion, they'd notice that they were the problem somehow (e.g., diagnosed with BPD). However, they still used their therapy to put them in a higher position against any non-therapy going man. You couldn't win an argument against them because obviously they "know what they are talking about."
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/25 03:45 AM
10

Some men don't have sex/reproduce. However, that doesn't take away their drive to have sex/reproduce. It's that drive to have sex/romance/intimacy and start a family that gives men incentive to better themselves so they can potentially find a mate. You take that drive away and many men will either drift into aimlessness at best or worst want to destroy others. Either of those scenarios will be a detriment to a civil society.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 10:11 PM
–

I care about equality. That includes equal justice. Just because the abuser is a woman doesn't mean that she gets a pass and/or a slap on the wrist for the same crime. A man who did the same would be smeared everywhere. There would be one-sided articles going into the man's past to figure out if he even looked at a woman the wrong way in college. Journalists would be trying to find any other women who might have been in a similar position.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/25 02:45 AM
–

An article is hardly a public outcry. If it was a man who did what she did, there would be deeper questioning. For example, trying to find out if there were any other helpless victims of the powerful abuser.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/25 02:41 AM
10

If it was a high-level male executive that did what she did, there would likely be more attention drawn to this. Front page material, in fact. I will not hold my breath that this will be given any front-page attention on reddit. I submitted this exact post to the askfeminists sub-reddit. It's still in moderator approval. I'm curious if they are going to deny the post to avoid negative attention drawn to a high-level feminist. Edit: I rescind my last paragraph. The askfeminists sub actually appro…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 08:40 AM
13

Say Sheryl Sandberg was a man. How loud would the general population scream that s/he is misogynistic/hates women/is abusive? Given that she is a woman, there will likely be very little attention given to this specific scenario.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 08:27 AM
3

I agree that just because you're in an executive role, that does not give you the right to do scumbag behavior. Not sure what your last paragraph means. However, I hope we can agree that we should not give people at the top of a company the benefit of the doubt, regardless of their sex/gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 07:39 AM
0

Many of them never had men wanting to sleep with, much less date, them in the first place. I saw brief youtube clips documenting the 4B movement in Korea. A lot of the women were older, quite unattractive and didn't have much going for them. Add to that the expectations they had on the men they'd be willing to date. They just shoot themselves in the foot. And I agree with the rest of what you said. I doubt women who were having casual sex before the election are fully abstaining today. If anythi…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:33 PM
1

I wouldn't say they're the same. Like you mentioned, the 4B movement in the West picked up after Trump was elected. So it's mainly a political response to the plausible loss of bodily autonomy. For the 4B women, sex/dating/relationships with men is off the table until they get changes in laws. Conversely, MGTOW was mostly formed by men who struggled getting into a relationship or struggling within one. The men decided that decentering women will result in an improved overall life. Many MGTOW men…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 05:27 PM
1

My guess is that men prefer to be the ones dominating versus being dominated.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 05:05 PM
1

In general, women have everything they'd need for a long-term relationship early in age. It takes men longer to build the things needed for a long-term relationship. I'm basing this off what the opposite sex typically wants from the opposite sex in an LTR. By mid-40s, I'd say both sexes likely have one or more issues that caused them to miss the opportunity for a healthy, long-term relationship. They can still find love, casual sex, and/or short-term relationships, however.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/25 05:00 PM
4

Not really. Men and women do not have the same kinds of romantic/sexual upbringing. To elaborate, post-puberty, women have everything they would need to be a suitable long-term romantic partner to a man. Conversely, it takes time and effort for a man to be considered a suitable long-term partner. So at 30, a woman would have already passed up multiple opportunities for love/LTRs. Whereas most men would be lucky to have had 25% of the amount of relationships/sexual partners that women his age hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 05:26 PM
0

In general, men are asking women to set their standards to a reasonable level. Somewhere where they are both attracted to the man and also can attract the type of man who won't treat her like an option.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 03:06 AM
4

I'll take your word for it. I'm curious how that came about, though. I wouldn't think that someone would say that to you out of nowhere. However, there are a lot of immature and emotional people out there. I'll admit, there are incels (men and women) who complain about everyone else's standards and their goal is to get others to lower their standards so that they meet them. There are also those who want to change the behavior of potential romantic prospects, even though they choose them and/or s…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 12:34 AM
3

I think men also need to do their part to be attractive to the women they date. Same for women. That's the only way an LTR will work out, IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 12:27 AM
3

Yeah, and everyone who complains about this is annoying. lol. I'm trying to do my part to reduce/eliminate the complaining.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 08:28 PM
2

Sure, that's always a possible outcome when you're aiming for the top X% of available romantic partners. The problem isn't that they will be alone. It's that they complain that they're alone and aren't willing to do anything to address that. I just wish people accepted that their standards aren't in line with what they offer a prospective mate. Hence, why they aren't able to find someone who meets their standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 08:11 PM
7

What I'm hearing from other women is that your view of attractive men is extremely narrow. And lowering your looks threshold even just slightly will make you unhappy from the get-go. Case in point, another woman in this thread called average men repulsive. That just baffles me. To me, you can still be attracted to someone even if you let go of some superficial standards. A man who had a strict preference for women who weighed no more than 130 lbs. can still likely find a 150 lb. woman attractive…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 08:01 PM
3

I would have the same message towards men who only want to date hot women but don't want those women to be bitches. Those women tend to have a lot of options, and if you aren't their best option, she will treat you like such. If you don't want to deal with that, then lower your looks standards and up your character/LTR standards. In general, many men go this route when they choose long-term partners. They'd rather be happy with a 5-7/10 woman with a pleasant attitude versus spending the rest of …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 07:26 PM
6

There's truth in that. If you were playing matchmaker and knew two individuals well, you might know that they would be well-suited for each other on a deeper level. One person might be stubborn, so you might suggest that person to not be so shallow. They might not have that raw primal desire towards that person, but it takes more than just pure desire to form a solid long-term relationship. I'm sure you'd agree with that. Women complaining does happen but I found that typically there is more to …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 05:37 PM
6

Um that’s exactly what you are asking. I dare say most straight women can think of a woman they would rather have sex with over a man. You have to understand that this is how repulsed some men are to some women. My point is that you don't have to go to extremes. There are still non-repulsive men who meet the basic character traits that would make for good long-term partners. Exactly and most women are willing to date that range it just so happens that range is smaller for women. You simply don’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 04:12 PM
12

Let's just stick to heterosexual relationships. No one is asking you to date that which you're not sexually attracted to (e.g., women dating men or men dating women). Plenty of us have a range of what we consider attractive in a potential mate. My ideal weight in a romantic partner is around 135 lbs. However, I'm not going to automatically discount a woman who is 155 lbs simply based on the number on a scale. This is especially true if she has other attractive qualities. If you truly think that …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 03:18 PM
9

If you don't want to give helpful advice, that's fine as well. Again, most men are giving advice based on what is the best solution to the problem given. Everyone has the opportunity to mistreat their dating options. Men and women. It's not productive to assume that they are all going to mistreat you, though. If your assumption is that average and unattractive men are all mistreating the women in their lives, then you should consider therapy before you consider dating. I'm not sure this conversa…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 07:18 AM
15

Ok, fine. Then accept that the men you want don't want to date you with serious intention. Also, stop complaining that you cannot attract said men. Men aren't asking you to drop your looks standards all together, btw. They're just saying that you need to be more reasonable based on what's available. If average men were out there saying that they only see women who are under 125 lbs as worthy of commitment, you would rightfully say that that is unreasonable. You would probably suggest that those …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 07:05 AM
9

You missed my second line - less attractive men don’t necessarily have better character. It seems that you believe that there are many mid men with hearts of gold. No need to put words in my mouth. I never said that. I said choose character over physical traits. I would say the same thing to men who put up with bitchy, abusive women who happen to have a nice body. At the end of the day, you need to decide whether you can let go of highly desirable physical traits to be with someone who loves you…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 06:51 AM
13

That's fair. However, that goes back to men advising women to slightly lower their looks standards and increase their character/long-term goal standards. Women seem to be opposed to that suggestion as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 05:23 AM
27

Men are saying that women should lower their standards because women keep complaining about not being able to find love. It's an easy solution to the problem. You don't like the solution, and that's fine. You can go ahead and ignore it. They complain endlessly about this too, because "muh birth rates" This is not so much a complaint as much as an observation. Declining birth rates WILL cause issues in the future. There are zero women complaining that our standards need to change to include men w…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 04:44 AM
77

Usually men don't give this advice randomly. It's usually in response to women's laments about not finding quality men to date. If you as a woman are unable to find the type of men you want to date, then that means that those men are not an option for you. In that case, if you do want to find love/romance, you need to be reasonable with who you can reasonably attract. If you choose to remain single, then great. Hope it works out for you. But QUIT COMPLAINING about the consequences that result fr…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 03:43 AM
3

Online searches can essentially be fruitless. For some topics, you might end up more confused after finding mostly opinion pieces on things. Especially with the different waves of feminism, you might end up mixing up a lot of what the movement is about. It sounds like OP wants something akin to an academic reference.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/25 09:02 PM
1

Interesting that you're getting a lot of NAWALT responses. I've seen a lot more women get upset when men state they do not want to date single mothers. Conversely, women tend to cheer when women state they do not want to date single fathers. I think part of that is because women don't like the idea that they are now limited in their dating options. They like to think that even as a single mother, they are just as good as before they had children. However, most men would rather avoid single mothe…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/25 07:04 AM
0

Bro the majority of women don't pick men like that. In the past, women were guided towards choosing better long-term mates. There's a reason why arranged marriages have the lowest rates of divorce. Today, it's very much hands-off when it comes to guiding women to make better decisions for the men they date/marry. Again, it's considered misogynistic to tell women to consider long-term success when they are younger. A lot of women end up not taking long-term values into consideration and end up in…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 05:04 AM
2

It sucks that many of us men are forced to compromise on looks/demeanor/finances today. Then tack on single motherhood... That's why it's important to guide the younger generations so that they don't end up in crappy situations like we are.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 04:44 AM
1

Is this settling down? Perhaps, most people love their homes, even if its not ideal. I think the feelings of settling and resentment set in if you can afford only the absolute bottom of the market. I would argue that truly settling down means you COULD HAVE purchased the top 20% home, but didn't due to issues outside of money. Back on the topic of dating: If I slept with supermodel-looking women when I had a ton of money but then after losing money, only average-looking women were interested in …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 04:39 AM
3

Ideally, women would understand that superficial attributes do not make for a good partner BEFORE they end up getting taken advantage of by the men with superficial attributes. The problem is that it's considered controlling/misogynistic to guide women to choose better partners early in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 04:27 AM
1

It's not about whether someone should expect a fit person to date them. It's more about putting yourself in a position where the people who meet your standards are more likely to exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 06:52 AM
3

I only mentioned extra weight and how it fits better on some women yet always looks repulsive above an excess amount. You brought BMI into this.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 03:58 AM
1

Nope, there's plenty of girls considered slightly or a bit overweight in terms of BMI that carry it in an hourglass shape who are rated more highly I literally said that: I'll admit, some women carry the extra weight well. men are clueless How are they clueless if they are also the ones rating said women?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 03:38 AM
1

To an extent. I'll admit, some women carry the extra weight well. However, above a certain weight, body shape will do nothing to offset the effect of fatness.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 03:25 AM
1

You're correct in that the majority of people in the US are overweight. A even larger percentage of people are out of shape. Yes, it is an uphill battle if someone is overweight themselves and wants to date a healthy weight or in-shape person. However, that doesn't mean that overweight people should be limited in dating other overweight people. Why shouldn't a man position himself to best meet women who fit his standards?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 03:17 AM
5

Hypergamy looks different in men compared to women. Women want to date up in socioeconomic status because they want a man who can fit the provider role. Someone who makes her feel taken care of. They want highly educated men because those men tend to be leaders and make more money. I'll ask you this: How realistic is it for a woman to date down in money/status/education and then also support her man emotionally? Most higher status women I know have said that they'd rather stay single than go tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 06:47 PM
–

Once pick-up artists snaked their way into red pill spaces, it marked the doom of RP. Suddenly, everyone who was RP was selling some sort of book/course on how to have more success with women. That brought in an even bigger number of struggling nerds/geeks. Some of those nerds/geeks realized they were being conned, so they started hating women and men. It's been downhill since. Now, when people think of RP, they just point to these toxic podcasters who only try to go viral on talking shit about …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/25 06:43 PM
1

Expanding your social circle isn't bad advice. The bigger your social circle, the more people you can meet through them. You might bump into someone who recognizes your friend and the two of you end up hitting it off. To me, having female friends implies you're not trying to get romantically involved with those women. That is, they are part of your friend group. So, there shouldn't be any qualms about the friend zone with them. Again, the benefit is that one of her friends might notice you and y…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/25 06:31 PM
2

That's a bit delusional. Even if you live in a largely populated area like NYC (with a population less than 10 million), you cannot realistically meet every single one of them. Even 10k people in your lifetime would be generous in terms of knowing them enough to determine romantic potential.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/25 10:54 PM
1

See my response to your other comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 09:12 PM
9

No need to put words in my mouth. You misunderstand. Take these two scenarios: I do a good deed with the expectation that a good thing will happen as a result. I live in a world where good outcomes happen to people who practice good deeds and are generally good people. Additionally, good outcomes do not happen to people who practice bad deeds and/or are considered bad people. You seem to focus on #1 and assume that everyone does a good deed and expects an immediate good outcome. That's typically…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 09:09 PM
5

What claim was that? And how was it debunked?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:21 PM
28

They're not acting like that. You think they are acting like that. You're making a lot of baseless assumptions.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:13 PM
4

That wasnt code for pussy. No one said it was. However, a good outcome from the universe would be in the form of having a family, which includes a romantic partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:11 PM
11

Throughout human history, we've built the idea that if you do good for others, eventually the universe will reward you with good outcomes. Wanting a relationship/attention for being a good person doesn't make you a bad person, especially when people themselves say that they're looking for a "good (wo)man" for a relationship. It's not like you're trying to pay for sex/relationships with "good person coins" or something to that effect.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:51 PM
21

Please explain how does this make sense? I've never seen anyone doing this, how does this sounds like? BPers like to argue in bad faith that men are expecting a tit for tat when they're a "good person". For example, "Women, look at this good deed I did. Now give me some sex."
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:41 PM
2

Where you live plays a big factor as well. If you live in a large, metropolitan area, you'll have a good number of potential matches. If you live outside of that or you prefer to date physically attractive women (who don't have to resort to online dating), you'll have to go about things differently.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 06:44 PM
1

You're implying that the woman in the example knows how to talk to men. They might both be shy/introverted. In that case, they can both build those social skills together.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 06:24 AM
1

I just thought, maybe this is not the case for OP, because maybe she is so mainstream/normal/average, that she simply is not compatible with someone like you described, and vice versa. Possibly. But if you're incompatible with the mainstream, then it may behoove you to look at options outside of the mainstream.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 08:49 PM
–

Can you at least try to come up with some warning signs that would appear before the commitment phase? Are you trying to assume that all warning signs are invisible until after the relationship was well-established?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 08:39 PM
1

I'm not sure why you ask this question. I did not say anything like that. I was responding to what you said here: It's just not understandable and probably not the case for people who have nothing unique and original to them. Perhaps I might have misunderstood. Well, yeah, so that makes both a bit different than the average person in some regards. If someone has a rather average lifestyle and personality, they probably are not compatible with someone who is so unique that he/she incompatible wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 08:24 PM
1

Why do you need to have something unique and original to get into a relationship? Fundamentally, relationships are about compatibility. A gamer/nerd guy might have no options. Neither would a gamer/nerd girl. However, they would both have common interests and likely similar lifestyles. Hence, they'd more than likely have a better relationship outcome assuming they didn't dismiss the other because they didn't have any other romantic options.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 07:52 PM
2

How would you know if they are better/worse for you, though? They might be incompatible with everyone else but might fit in perfectly with you. Granted, I will concede that a person desperate for attention/love will likely wear you down over time. I've had female orbiters who would offer to blow me just so that they can hang out with me. It was nice at first but got annoying over time. However, as long as you have some attraction towards that person, I don't see how you should dismiss that perso…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 06:59 PM
1

If you want value from a prospective partner, you should bring value as well. Where people get upset at these standards is that the person asking for said standards is usually lacking in standards themselves. For example, a broke man thinking that he will find a young, beautiful woman who will love him for him. Another example is a broke, single mother thinking that a rich man is going to forego having his own children so that he gets the "privilege" of raising hers.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 06:25 PM
–

Are you dating neckbeards?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 08:41 PM
3

A lack of ambition or life direction is highly unattractive. It's understandable for women not to want to date a guy like that. He may consider it shallow, but from her perspective, the guy is dead weight. What does he expect if he loses his job? Does he expect a gf/wife to take care of him? I could possibly consider dating a woman with a part time job if she was bringing something else to the table (e.g., having and helping raise our children). But if she was just looking to be a bum, then hell…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 08:38 PM
1

I've run into way too many women who were once sugar babies. And these were the ones that brought that up in convo (e.g., "my sugar daddy bought me X the other day."). I imagine many more hide it from everyone. It's becoming more and more mainstream. How are men supposed to want to commit to/wife up women who treated sex/relationships in a transactional manner like that?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 03:50 PM
0

Right. It does make it tough as a man looking for women to date. The pickings are slim (no pun intended). Even after putting in the work, it's not like these women will magically appear. Part of me wishes I could go back to the 70s when women presented themselves in a natural way and were mostly at a healthy weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 03:17 PM
1

When you get married and/or start a family, it's no longer just about you and your happiness at that point. The family becomes a unit. Decisions are made together. It's not illegal to divorce. However, it is selfish, especially if you're doing so to live some hedonistic lifestyle.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/25 10:59 PM
1

By complaining enough such that there is added social pressure for the organizers to allow women in. The largest example would be the Boy Scouts.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 03:34 AM
0

Are you HVM enough such that people are going to know you by name due to your accomplishments? If not, you'll at least want to build some kind of legacy in your lifetime. Otherwise, what's the point of living the life you're living? The easiest route to build a legacy is to start and build a family. At least your children/grandchildren will know how great of a person you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 05:22 AM
-3

Any groups or societies that are exclusively male-centered will eventually have one or more women complaining that they shouldn't be excluded. Once those women make enough of a stink about it, the group will be forced to include women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 05:11 AM
1

When men reject women, in general they just turn the woman down and go about their day. On occasion, he'll laugh about her amongst his friends. It's shitty to do and a sign of immaturity, but that would be the end of that. In contrast, some women retort socially, at times to great effect. If they're offended enough, they'll report the man, attack his character and/or ridicule him among her friends. This behavior has been amplified with social media rewarding virality. Just recently there was a v…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 05:48 PM
4

You can be supportive and competitive. A RP man can listen to another man, be empathetic to his plight, and give him advice on how to improve his status/luck with women. At the same time, that RP man can want and choose the best for himself. Poaching someone's partner really only exists in player/PUA circles. It's pretty low-vibrational behavior. There are plenty of monogamous/married RPers who respect other men's relationships. I personally frown upon stealing someone's girl and I'm especially …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 12:28 AM
3

Along with “enjoy the decline” — they’re not out to make the world better, just to get theirs That phrase is more about making the best of what life has available to you now and not expecting it to change for us. None of us as individuals will have any real impact on society at large. We can't just say "doing X activity is bad for society" and expect others will agree and stop that behavior. For example, when it comes to long-term relationships, some might say that sleeping around is bad and it …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 12:09 AM
7

Unfortunately, a lot of male archetypes get lumped into the "red pill" category. Pick-up artists, pimps, players, MGTOW, incels, male rights activists, possibly others. There is some overlap, sure, but each group looks at the world with a different lens. What you described is more of the player sub-type. Plus, adding incels in there is a way for people to dismiss RP as a whole (e.g., "RPers are just basement dwellers who can't get laid or get into relationships").
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 11:33 PM
2

From my experience, men typically find themselves in RP spaces after a bad breakup or negative situation with a woman. Personally, I had a relationship go south fast after an ex got in shape and started getting attention from the body builders at the gym. The relationship was going great. Out of the blue, she broke up with me, saying that she wanted space. I gave her the space she wanted. She was going through some other stuff, so I was still there for her when she was feeling down. A few weeks …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 08:11 PM
3

LOL @ That last link. They're mad that they can't have exclusive hateful slogans.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 03:41 AM
2

That's a pretty reasonable approach, then. I've dated women who were total "boss babes", and I never really knew how they were at work. Usually, at home, they would be relaxed, fun, and generally care-free. It wasn't until I joined one at a conference where I saw a switch in personality. The same woman that was acting soft and submissive towards me the night before was out there commanding/scolding people who were slacking. I found the changeup pretty fascinating. Hopefully you'll find whatever …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 07:12 PM
1

It's great that a woman like that has her own place and makes decent money. Those things don't necessarily make her more attractive to the average man, though. She's been in four LTRs, so I hope one can assume that she's not a pain in the ass to be around. That's a plus. I personally don't mind rugged women who get their hands dirty. However, can she still class it up? Is she able to be feminine/flirty/sexy at the right times? Or is she "one of the guys" 100% of the time? One red flag I would lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 03:33 AM
7

It's fair for OP to bring up lesbian couples. It allows women to relate to it. Plus, they cannot immediately brush it off by saying men were the problem in the relationship dynamics.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 03:15 AM
–

There should be proof that the support is going primarily to the child. The custodial parent should not be able to spend it on things that are not for the child. Having the money in a card and having some sort of auditing system would work there. Further, a certain percentage of the child support should go to some sort of 509 fund that only the child can access when he/she turns 18.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 06:19 PM
2

This also applies to people who say they "know their worth." Most people think they are exceptional and/or think they should get the same kind of treatment as someone else. That's unrealistic. People are always going to put more effort into someone who they think is worth that effort. You can't just declare that you're worth the same. Not that someone should tolerate disrespect. However, you're going to need to think objectively and realistically when it comes to attraction. Aim for someone who …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 06:01 PM
2

He doesn't. He's pointing out that that's what women are drawn to.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 06:00 PM
8

We have to stop thinking that average is an insult.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 05:48 PM
1

There are different levels for each: You pay a prostitute just for sex. You pay an escort for some temporary companionship (which may or may not include sex). You pay a sugar baby for an ongoing romantic relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 03:10 AM
0

Sure, I agree with that. With sugaring, you aren't paying directly for sex, though. You're still essentially bf/gf, but perhaps more discrete. I would frame it like a consistent escort where you also spend time together outside of the "job".
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 06:29 PM
3

This isn't a men against women issue though, some men really like it and some women hate it. It's a bit age and resource-dependently, really. Young women in general get more enjoyment out of serial dating, by taking advantage of their beauty. Men ask out women 90+% of the time, so women usually never pay for dates unless she offers. Young men who don't have much to their name dislike spending most of their discretionary income just to enjoy a woman's company and not have it result in a relations…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 06:23 PM
0

Oh, like prostitution? More like a mutually beneficial relationship. They both enjoy the relationship, but they are both also gaining something that they wouldn't otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 06:02 PM
1

In a healthy relationship, both people will strive to be healthy and attractive for the other. That also means being responsible for oneself. If both people gained significant weight, then it makes sense to try to tackle the weight loss together. If it's just one person getting complacent and gaining weight, ultimately it's up to that individual to course correct. You can't put an extra burden on your partner's shoulder when it should be your responsibility to take care of yourself and be attrac…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 04:30 AM
–

My theory is that it's upsetting for a woman to be proposed something casual. There have to be women who are open to it, but only on their terms. In other words, she has to be in charge of the direction of a casual relationship. The moment a man proposes something casual, it's now in the woman's head that the man thinks she's easy. In that case, she'll turn you down to avoid thinking that she's now a slut.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 02:09 AM
4

A fit, attractive 30+ year old woman will still have plenty of options in the dating market. Not as many options as a fit, attractive 20-year-old, but still plenty. For your question, there is no guarantee to prevent someone from leaving you for someone younger. However, if you continue to be the best version of yourself and you bring value to the relationship, there's no reason why someone would want to leave you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 06:44 AM
1

You can be conservative and still think abortion is okay. Many conservatives women do believe in freedom of choice. That is true. I voted conservative myself and also support women having access to abortions. I'll rescind that point of mine. Where are people getting porn star voting patterns? And are they disclosing why they voted that way?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 05:10 AM
9

It makes sense if they are fiscally conservative since they are high earners and want to keep as much of their money as possible (i.e., "don't tax me, bro"). However, ask them about abortion, and I'd bet good money they'll lean liberal.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 04:51 AM
21

Damned if you do; damned if you don't. I understand wanting to protect a drunk/defenseless woman. However, if you get into a fight with a drunk, you're likely to get seriously injured, especially if you've been drinking yourself. You have no idea how far a drunk person will take an altercation. Two weeks ago in my local area, a man and woman were arguing outside of a bar around 3am. A passerby saw them, tried to intervene, and ended up getting stabbed by the man. He bled to death before an ambul…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 04:48 AM
–

When I was on the dating apps, it wasn't uncommon to see women's profiles with demeaning phrases about men's height (e.g., "real men above 6 ft only", "if you aren't taller than me in 4" heels, swipe left", "I need to feel like a woman next to my man"). By and large, most dating apps do not allow any similar types of phrases from men towards women. If a man were to write on his bio, "no women above 150 lbs" or "big women swipe left", his account would be banned within a day. To your three points…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/24 10:15 PM
1

There are some men out there who immediately jump on the "she's gonna hit the wall hard!" bandwagon on any post where a woman complains about lack of options or brags about being able to sleep with many higher-status men. I suspect people like OP see those kinds of responses and assume that all RP men are trying to shame women into lowering their standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/24 05:51 AM
1

Only if I'm hoping to attract them (and keep them for that matter). I don't mean changing who I am altogether but amplifying my current style and/or making better fashion choices (e.g., higher-quality fabrics, better fits, tailoring if necessary). I can't blame women for not finding me attractive when I put forth little to no effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/24 12:58 AM
2

The problem with what you're suggesting is that men would have to improve relative to women (e.g., more men graduating from college, more men with higher paying jobs, more men with social status). That way, a greater number of women would be able to date up and satisfy their hypergamous nature. Improving men while women stagnate would be seen as discrimination (even though women don't see it that way when they are the ones being promoted). I highly doubt society will allow that at this point in …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 10:15 PM
0

At least that has some sort of basis and is an attribute within one's control, though. Calling someone a neck beard implies they don't know how to properly shave and/or do not keep up with basic hygiene.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/24 04:51 AM
2

I agree with you. Men seem to take whatever they can get. And women seem to have no issue coming to a man with tons of debt, children from previous relationships, poor attitudes, and extremely overweight. Men who marry such women aren't really catches themselves. They are usually broke losers or goofy simps with low self-esteem. If women want those men, then cool. Hopefully they can make it work. IMO, their marriage will be unsatisfying in the long run, for various reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 03:51 PM
2

You're right that finding out if a man used escorts is more difficult since there aren't accounts created which can be tracked. Unless he did something dumb like use a personal email. However, you'd be surprised what a good PI can uncover. Plus, if something is put on the internet, you cannot scrub it completely.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 10:25 PM
4

That's a big "if" on both parts. Only a fraction of women are good enough to make it big on OF. And given how popular that platform is, men are looking at long-term relationships with more of an objective eye. Men who are looking for marriage are going to run background checks to make sure his future wife wasn't on OF or operating as an escort/sugar baby.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 09:02 PM
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I think a month is reasonable before being intimate. My comment was in reference to the women that choose to make the man wait for 3-6+ months before being intimate. If the man has no other options and/or the woman is his best option, he might consider waiting begrudgingly. However, any self-respecting man is going to walk away from that. Worst case scenario is the man gets into a sunk cost scenario, waits until she's ready to be intimate, sleeps with her out of spite, then dumps her because the…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 11:05 PM
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So stop acting like men have the license to be degenerates and that women are somehow entitled and depriving them for not having casual sex. Huh? I never said that. Nor did I imply it. Let's not fight strawmen here. My stance on this is that men shouldn't take advantage of women and they shouldn't get in the way of women who are looking for something serious/long-term. Whether you like it or not, women control whether sex is going to happen in a relationship. You cannot force a man to commit to …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 09:57 PM
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Arranged marriages would solve this issue in a jiffy. In all seriousness, we should all be vetting thoroughly if we want to have fulfilling long-term relationships. That means getting to know someone for a while before being intimate.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 09:49 PM
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I started at that CDC link and made my way to the source of the data, which is what I linked. I still think there isn't enough data to really extrapolate to the entire country. However, I will concede that in conservative areas/communities, you'll probably see numbers closer to what is in the table you posted.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 09:37 PM
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I'm assuming you're referring to this study: Age, sex, and other demographic trends in sexual behavior in the United States: Initial findings of the sexual behaviors, internet use, and psychological adjustment survey - PMC The sample size for that was 1,987. Not really representative of the country as a whole. Depending on where you live, that number can vary wildly. Try living in Miami, LA, NYC, or any college town and I guarantee you the number is much higher.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 09:06 PM
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Even men who want LTRs won't wait too long if it seems like the woman is just testing him. In order for this strategy to work, a man has to feel like the woman is worth the wait (e.g., beautiful, childless, sexy, rich, etc.). Unless a woman is willing to date down, this won't work. Even then, he might leave if he feels she's just playing hard to get.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 08:58 PM
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That only works if women as a collective weren't having casual sex and/or they were aiming for average to below-attractive men. Choosing to withhold sex will deter men if they think you are testing them. Only desperate men would deal with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 08:52 PM
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Women control access to sex; men control access to relationships. The key for women is for them to pick men who would want them for a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 07:56 PM
1

If that was true, you'd see a lot more men dating younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/24 07:43 PM
2

Women want to have full control of the relationship after they accept commitment. She can get as comfortable as she wants and you have to love her as she is, even if she gained 50+ pounds and/or stopped putting effort into her appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/24 09:27 PM
6

In sickness and health doesn't mean that you can stop trying to be attractive for your spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/24 09:16 PM
1

According to the state, the man has been acting in the father role and will be forced to pay child support. All that matters is what's on the birth certificate. It'll be a very costly endeavor to get the courts to absolve you of any future child support payments. Forget about getting reimbursed for anything you already paid. Friends, family members, community members, etc. will shame the hell out of you for abandoning your child / breaking up the family. You'll constantly get told to "do the rig…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/24 09:30 PM
1

Sorry you had a shitty father, but parents do influence the way children operate in terms of mate selection. Sometimes it happens indirectly (e.g., "My parents had a terrible relationship so I am going to choose qualities that are different than my <opposite sex parent>."). Sometimes they directly gave you advice and weighed in on who you are currently dating. Maybe not so much today, but in the past, it wasn't uncommon for both the mother and father to weigh in on who their son was dating. It d…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/24 03:36 PM
1

OP, as a society, we've moved away from guiding women towards making long-term decisions with regards to a mate. In the past, parents (especially fathers) had a say in who their daughter interacted with (e.g., "You should spend more time with Kevin. He comes from a good family and is studying to become a doctor."). Today, society tells women to do whatever feels right to them. And you can't really blame them for operating the way they do. Imagine if at the point you hit puberty, you were gifted …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/24 01:17 AM
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