TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Elena1684 Archive

View 0 posts and 62 comments by Elena1684 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
12

She works part time which means she’s trapped unless she gets a full time job and tells him to shove the bills up his ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/22 01:09 AM
28

I needed this post. My ex of 28 years caused me pain pretty much our entire marriage before leaving me for the OW. He’s still hiding her so I don’t know who she is. Anyway a week ago he accidentally sent a text meant for her to my 16 year old daughter. I was crushed. The man was killing me slowly but I think she is better than me. He’s an awful person I know this but it still hurts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 10:35 AM
4

Marrying the wrong woman is the excuse they give when they've decided to monkey branch onto someone else. Most women I know divorced because their husbands cheated. One woman left due to her husband's drug abuse, one cheated herself but these are outliers. Women I know stayed until the bitter end even if they were miserable. I am old so hopefully the new generation learns from our mistakes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/22 04:06 PM
3

If I date again I’m never telling a man anything about my trauma. They absolutely will use it against you even if it’s just in the heat of the moment. I will not date until I’m completely done talking about what happened to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/22 09:36 PM
60

Ah yes FOMO. No matter who they have they always think there is someone better. They lack the ability to see past this weekend to consider that their choices might not be good ones. When their current relationship is unsatisfying they believe they are blameless and that new CraZy girl is the ONE until she slashes his tires in a rage. It’s then that they think the boring women who packed his lunch and bought him a nice shirt wasn’t as awful as he thought she was. Men are stupid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/22 02:26 AM
16

Amen. Just signed my divorced papers after living this hell for 28 years. 28 YEARS. Ladies you have absolutely no idea how bad this life is. It makes you sick, beats you down until you there is nothing left that is remotely YOU and honestly the only thing I got out of this bull shit deal was money, once a week sex (low T) and 3 awesome kids (which I got to keep because they hate him). I’m FREE!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 01:53 PM
104

I married this guy and signed my divorce papers a few days ago. The irony is he’s in the exact place he was when he was with me. His new girlfriend will be treated the same way. They never change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 02:43 PM
16

My new female boss did this to her son. Same scenario, DIL pregnant he cheated and then soon after it all blew up he died in a car accident. It took my boss 10 years to recover but I’m proud of how she handled it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/22 01:35 AM
13

What men like this want is a stable, loving toxic woman. They want the highs without the lows not realizing you can’t have one without the other. This guy is aware enough to know this yet still fantasies that his ex could have been a unicorn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/22 02:46 PM
106

She fell for the con. Men like this are masters at future faking, gaslighting and outright lying. It almost always blows up in their face but they think they are far too clever to ever get caught.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 11:29 PM
24

They are lazy and have no patience. Sitting at home searching for women (even if they have to pay for them) is easier than having to put the time and effort into a real relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 11:25 PM
2

My stbxh has been hiding the OW for well over 3 years now. He denies even having a girlfriend and called in sick for the deposition. It’s all about his image. I swear he’s waiting for me to date first so he gets to stay clean. My kids come first so he’s going to be waiting a long long time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 11:18 PM
5

My husband dumped me and yet still felt the need to send random items back via the kids (I had cut him off). The things men do to maintain control are truly mind boggling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 11:11 PM
3

He’s cheating and the friends are covering for him. I hate that I know the signs now but I do. If you have to say he’s not cheating then he is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 11:07 PM
17

He's cheating and will dump her when he finds someone better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 04:39 PM
2

Mine left me and I went no contact after 4 months of begging. He hated this because he truly believed I’d still be there for him and I was until I wasn’t. He tried baiting me through the kids while simultaneously honoring my boundaries to maintain his image. I filed for divorce the day after I found out about his girlfriend. Even after that he’d send stupid things like toilet paper, hand sanitizer and my favorite drink. I happily took his gifts and continued to ignore him. All my messages were f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 03:35 PM
32

I’m going through an unwanted divorce and have 2 teenage girls and a college aged son still at home. I’m over it now but in the beginning I pouted because my stbxh has a girlfriend and I couldn’t do that to my kids. It’s hard to watch my daughters go on dates sometimes because I’m home alone but I know I’m doing the right thing. I won’t even consider dating until they move out. I get judged for this because people think I deserve happiness too. I think maybe but at what cost? Is it really worth …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 01:04 AM
15

I would never have left so I say he put me out of my misery. He let me out of his cage. I was falsely imprisoned because he knew he hated me for decades. I’m just now being told the truth. 30 years too late but I’m out now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 07:19 PM
7

I’m a 55 year old former SAHM. 3 years ago he left me for a coworker. Last week I paid my rent with a credit card because he was a bit late paying me alimony. I’m okay because he’s a LVM who follows court orders but I’m still poor. Men get all upset when they have to pay alimony but I wouldn’t have food without it. I regret getting married and I regret quitting my job because the economy is terrible. This woman has no idea what she’s in for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 07:04 PM
1

This happened to a coworker a couple of weeks ago. He wasn’t trying to kill her or cause a wreck he just disabled the car so it wouldn’t run essentially trapping her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 07:07 PM
175

I’m divorcing one. His narcissism is worse because evidently his side piece isn’t as good at managing his image as I was. These men will literally kill you. You’ll be angry and depressed. You’ll self medicate with something. You’ll need extensive dental work from grinding your teeth. You’ll live on pepto because your stomach is messed up. Your neck and back will hurt from stress. You’ll take a lot of Tylenol and miss work due to migraines. You’ll have nightmares and won’t sleep well. You’ll go t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 10:18 AM
11

I’m old and married down. He was fat and I was a gym rat. 30 years later he loses 50 pounds and I gain 40. He looks amazing and I’m a middle aged blob. Of course he was cheating (duh) and leaves me for her. So happy, tan, thin and I was devastated. In no time he aged 10 years, gotten fat, his hair is fully gray now and receding. He’s a full blown alcoholic so he’s got that bloat now. I lost the weight, got a new haircut, new clothes and look way better now than I did when I was with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 03:19 PM
63

My new boss talks about how wonderful her husband is, how perfect, how he’s smarter than her, if it wasn’t for him she’d be nothing. She literally can’t go 10 minutes without talking about him. This was me 3 years ago so I’m jealous that she got to keep her wonderful husband and I lost mine. But then I started looking deeper. She looks 10 years older than she is, has lots of health problems, anxiety is through the roof and I was this person too. Talking to her is like looking in a mirror. If he’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 04:41 PM
53

I did something similar and got my stbxh to propose after 18 months. It was downhill from there. I learned the hard way that if you have to manipulate anyone to stay in your life you will pay dearly for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 09:19 PM
24

Single (3 years now) after a 28 year marriage. I’m not BPD, bipolar, depressed, anxiety ridden, or an angry crazy woman. I’m calm, witty and I think everything is funny. I get into these laughing fits often and I rarely get angry. It turns out I’m not helpless (shocking) and can do a lot of things he said I couldn’t. He thought I couldn’t be alone and now I LOVE being single. My home is messy, loud, no more trying to be a perfect submissive wife. I am free.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/22 02:55 AM
6

My LVM emotionally abusive husband of 28 years has been gone for 3 years. 5 months is fresh and raw so be kind to yourself. It takes time to process it all and heal but you’ll get there if you stay single until you are happy alone. If an old lady like me can heal so can you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 07:02 PM
195

I spent 30 years with an eating disorder despite being thin. I’d starve myself and exercise sometimes 2 times a day. My husband leaves and I’m miraculously cured. My weight has stabilized and I haven’t weighed myself in 3 years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 01:59 PM
82

I’m 55 and messed up by marrying a man who is bad with money. He left me for someone else and financially ruined me. Thankfully I was awarded half his pension, have a great job and am a whiz at managing money but I’m still scared. He won’t sign the papers and I’m out of cash so I’ll have to wait to take him back to court. Instead of rebuilding my finances I have to pay my attorney. Marriage is a huge financial risk and had I realized that I would have made better choices but instead I let him ta…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 12:00 AM
4

Great post. I saw red flags on our first date but they were so subtle that I convinced myself that I was overreacting. He had 2 beers on our first date - later became an alcoholic. Nothing wrong with drinking in moderation but my gut said this was different. They were expensive beers - he lives beyond his means and was in substantial debt. I knew and married him anyway. It did not end well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/22 06:53 PM
6

I have an anxious attachment style (wouldn't wish this on anyone either) so I do this. If it's a new person I can resist however if they turn out to be someone who regularly takes a day to respond then I cut them loose. Too busy to text back people aren't my people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 03:44 PM
2

I don't know who the woman he left me for is but he did go from attractive to alcohol bloat and beer gut in no time. A few years before the discard I was doing P90X, was in the best shape of my life and am attractive. I'm smart, a great cook, a whiz with money and I adored him. He still cheated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 03:44 PM
43

In marriage counseling my stbxh pushed my buttons until I got angry while he sat there calmly. They both determined that I was the problem. He then had all the ammunition to blame everything on my anger issues. He also convinced our kids. It wasn't until after he left I figured this out. Turns out I'm a very calm, happy go lucky person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/22 10:46 PM
55

I have a coworker who married a gold digger. They both made great money but she paid for most of the fun. This is her 2nd marriage so she owned a home prior to him and he pushed her to get married. Red flag - her friends and family did not like him. She lost her high paying job during covid and now she’s getting divorced. They were married for 20 years and her divorce is going to be expensive and ugly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 12:48 PM
8

I suspect my soon to be ex husband planned on leaving me at least 6 months prior. A few months after he left I found out he was with a coworker. 3 years later they are still together but the honeymoon phase didn’t last long. He’s a full blown alcoholic now, health fading, he’s aged 10 years and has gained a lot of weight. Oh well…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 01:54 AM
17

Of course there is hope but first you need to get out of a scarcity mindset which starts from being happy alone. You just got out of likely an awful marriage so why the rush to partner back up? I’m going through a divorce after 28 years of marriage and I’ve been living on my own for almost 3 years now. At first I felt like you but I’m over it now. I’ll probably date again but not until I’m happy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 07:46 PM
18

I’m old and this happens a lot. I have a 50 year old coworker who just married a 25 year old. The woman that leads my divorce care class her husband left her for one of her kids friends. A divorced father of my kids friends continues to date women 25 years younger than him. I don’t know who my husbands side piece is but in my mind I imagine she’s young. These women think they’ve won a prize but women like me know who they’ve won so good luck with that. Lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 07:22 PM
11

This is my 3rd Christmas alone since my husband left me for someone else after 30 years together. I’m sad until I remember what it was like to be with a grinch (pun intended). He literally hated everything. I miss being part of a couple but it’s better to be alone than with someone who hates life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 06:40 PM
16

I have a pretty 19 year old daughter. She works in a restaurant and this happens all the time. She’s been followed in stores by old men. On social media 50 year olds hit her up asking if she wants a sugar daddy. It’s made her think all men are disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 04:29 PM
2

My stbxh caused me to have a nervous breakdown but within months I was functioning again because I sought help. Granted it didn’t stop him from leaving but I tried to fix his complaints about me. Too bad it was one sided. In his eyes he was perfect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 11:20 AM
12

Karma is real. He married a "mean girl" and its highly unlikely that she has changed. Skinny wife does not equal happy for either party.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/21 06:27 PM
2

I was married for 28 years and I don’t recommend it. 5 minutes to say “I do”. 3 years and $15k in legal fees to say “I don’t anymore”. It’s a trap and not one that is easily gotten out of. If I had a do over I would have just lived with him or at the very least set up my life as if I were getting divorced from day 1. From what everyone tells me one of you has to be willing to walk away with nothing for a divorce to go smoothly and quickly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/21 10:59 PM
6

The good news is this men like this are communicating just not with words. The bad news is when pick me’s receive this message the men gaslight and future fake them. He’s just stressed, tired, his boss is a jerk, he will feel better when (insert anything) but the truth is he hates you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/21 01:07 PM
32

I’m going through a divorce after being married for 28 years. My stbxh was stick thin but yes right after we got married he gained a bunch of weight. I stayed thin. Later on he lost weight and unbeknownst to me got a new girlfriend. I gained 40 pounds. 2 years later I’m thin and he’s fat again. He drinks and overeats when he’s unhappy which is his natural state. He gets a boost in a new relationship but it doesn’t last. This might not apply to all men who gain weight after marriage but this was …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/21 04:39 AM
39

He’s not enlightened he’s just learned a better way to manipulate. The same thing happens when you take a LVM to marriage counseling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 03:30 PM
6

I agree. I'm a single mom. My stbxh left me for a coworker (divorce in process) and I kid you not he was killing me slowly. I had all these health problems that have all magically disappeared since he left.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 09:47 PM
6

My stbxh makes decent money but he can’t manage it. He lives beyond his means and without someone reigning him in he gets into substantial debt. His new girlfriend likely thinks he’s loaded but he’s a total fraud. Been there done that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 01:17 AM
81

I married a man like this and I didn’t catch the lie about his income while we were dating. I also didn’t find out about his substantial debt until then either. He turned out to be a good provider up until the kids got older and he dumped me for a coworker. Now I’m a poor single mom. RUN.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/21 10:40 PM
5

He knows she’s pretty. He’s got her so beat down though that she thinks this is the best she can do. Oh and he definitely cheated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 06:46 PM
45

They are fishing for someone to carry the relationship so they get all the perks without putting forth any effort.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 07:19 PM
2

I’m going through a divorce after 28 years of marriage (he cheated and left). The key to your story is that your husband stayed single for 7 years. Anyone can level up but it takes time. Lots and lots of time. Years single. I wasn’t a HVW before but I am now (he left 2.5 years ago). I still wouldn’t date until I was at least one year out from my divorce preferably 2. I’m not interested but this would be my rule.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 04:18 AM
3

Dating someone who is separated might land you in court. My stbxh has a girlfriend and we are still very married (separated for 2 years). I filed with grounds (no legal separation in my state and yes he cheated). He called in sick to the deposition (of course he did). I got an awesome settlement in pre trial (not official). If he doesn’t sign I will put his girlfriend on the stand in the actual trial.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 04:02 AM
88

Happened to a coworker of mine. He had another kid and everything. He got caught when he got sick and both women showed up at the hospital.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 03:28 AM
5

I’m 55 years old and my huge extended family is filled with LVM both with money and without. In my case I blame living in a male dominated world. All men had to do was provide and the women stayed because they had to. Their daughters grew up as pick mes and their sons LVM themselves. Society has only magnified the problem. My family grew up in small towns so cheating wasn’t as big of a thing as it is today. Now men can literally find and talk to OW while their wife is in the same room. The inter…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 08:18 PM
8

I’m going through a divorce now and I don’t think it’s a good idea to get married whether you’re rich or poor. My stbxh is a LVM and I got 3 great kids out of the deal but 2.5 years later I can’t get rid of him and he’s the one who left. Had I not made the huge mistake of marrying him I’d be free right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 12:44 AM
3

I didn’t see it as a red flag but my stbxh broke up with his ex because she was “crazy”. I marry him and 30 years later he dumps me because I’m “crazy”. Oh and I was “crazy” for 30 years too but he still married me and had 3 kids with me. Mind boggling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 06:22 PM
29

Add in a few more red flags and you’ve just described my stbxh. Let me give you a glimpse into your future. Once a week sex seems like something you can deal with but it will get old. Even if he doesn’t want full blown sex he could still make time to be intimate with you 3x a week but he won’t and you’ll eventually resent him for that. He’s going to get fatter and you’ll overlook it because you love him but at some point you’ll worry about him. You’ll cook healthy meals, encourage him to work ou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 09:20 PM
39

I was married for 28 years and ended up having a nervous breakdown. I was crazy, he convinced our kids I was crazy and after he left I was no longer crazy. He’s been gone 2.5 years and I’m still not divorced. Tomorrow is pre trial and he’s going to try and convince the judge that he had to leave because I was unstable. I’ve been set up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 05:01 AM
29

I was a homemaker and he left me for someone else when the kids were teens. I’m struggling financially now so please be careful before taking this risk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 01:53 PM
7

My stbxh wiped out our savings before leaving. He was a good provider and he made more money than me. I paid the bills but he planned his exit for quite a while. He knew exactly what he was doing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 12:08 AM
53

I lived this nightmare for 28 years before he left me for someone else. I should have divorced him the minute I found out he lied about his salary and hid how much debt he had but instead I stayed. Paid off his debt (3 different times) but was told I was controlling. I’m sad, he’s stalling the divorce but thank you for this post. It reminds me than now his excessive spending (and debt) is someone else’s problem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 12:14 AM
38

My soon to be ex husband of 28 years left me 2 years ago for a coworker. I didn’t realize how sick I was until he was gone. He was killing me slowly. My health is so much better now. I’m no contact but my kids say he looks awful now. Drinks heavily, has aged 10 years, gaining weight and what’s super annoying is my attorney keeps having to drag him to court so I can get a divorce that he wanted. Men are stupid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 12:27 AM
42

My soon to be ex husband left me for a coworker after 30 years together. He diagnosed me with BPD, said he left me because I’m crazy. I was depressed, washing down zannex with vodka, angry, started binge eating/gained 40 pounds, convinced that everything was my fault. It’s been 2 years and these thoughts still crush me, I’m sad however not long after he left I felt normal. I’m sleeping soundly, haven’t had one drink since he left, lost the weight, anxiety is gone, no more tension pain, etc. He c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 03:33 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter