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Elle_Bee__ Archive

View 0 posts and 30 comments by Elle_Bee__ on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Laugh, Jesus, I was being a little tongue-in-cheek about the saves men’s lives. When I was young, my mother decided we were going to move provinces and didn’t even consult my father. Back then, children belonged with mothers and fathers had few rights that way. Now it’s different. So rules changed again and now father’s have more rights that way. Does this mean fathers are now more entitled because they get to say: “Actually, no. You’re not moving to Milwaukee with Todd-New-Boyfriend with my chi…
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/24 03:36 AM
2

A story I see lots here: Ex made allegations and moved into a woman’s shelter. Got an EPO. Everything cleared but damage done. She had matrimonial home and she didn’t pay mortgage - his name was on it. She cheated: Told the children a bunch of awful stuff and refused visitation. Got a lawyer paid by LegalAid and he had to pay. Lost his job. No money. She’s also a shitty parent, he became suicidal. Went to hospital. Don’t get me wrong, they both had a lot of problems. He could have made a lot of …
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/24 02:48 AM
2

So, I am a woman. I am a guest in someone else’s house when I visit this sub. I'm here because a friend ended up in the hospital due to a bad divorce. I want to understand. But, I have a concern. You mentioned changes in family violence and marital rape laws leading to greater entitlement in women. That’s one opinion. I have another opinion: maybe these laws save men’s lives. Let’s say I’m married to someone who likes to use his fists. Let’s say I couldn’t leave because of the laws. I realize he…
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/24 02:31 AM
3

Dude, you’re having fun. Just go with it. Don’t marry her tomorrow and you’ll be fine. Finding happiness is hard enough - don’t squish it
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 06:24 PM
13

21 years. That’s roughly 11,300 days of you wanting her to stop drinking. Wanting her to stop verbally abusing you. Wanting her to make a positive change. She’s only been sober for 90 days. 11,300 of your days versus 90 of her days. Just be careful and take it slow,
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 09:39 PM
2

I don’t imagine it’s common. Being forced to spend 18 years co-parenting with a man who hates me. Raising a child on my own. A couple grand a month isn’t worth it. I originally thought it was $300k in CS a year so if thats just a percentage of their income, that’s a high-earner. I could maybe see some people wanting to enjoy some of that money, if possible. It’s human nature. Anyway, I figured I’d never have the opportunity to ask someone in that tax bracket such a blunt question so I went with …
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 08:11 AM
3

Ooh, okay. My frame of reference was this: 3 kids @ father’s 60,000/yr for 18 years. Child support is approximately $1,100 (ish) a month. That would be $240,000 (ish) total when multiplied over that time. I guessed you made substantially more and were likely American but the $300,000 for one kid seemed like a lot. The rules must be different. I get it now. I don’t know what to say about the money stuff. Sounds like it’s got its perks but also sounds like you constantly feel like you have to be o…
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 02:29 AM
2

Wait, what? That FWB you mentioned , you mean you could have been on the hook for $300k just in child support? Is that real? Damn. And is this a common thing? I’ve dated people with some cash but not pay $300k in child support kind of money. I know behaviour changes a lot when money becomes wealth but I’ve never seen it. Do people try to manipulate you in this way? Normally I don’t like to weigh in on comments about money. I’m just here because someone I care about ended up in hospital over a ba…
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 12:58 AM
4

Did you just come here to congratulate yourself on having completely unrelated life experiences and then encouraged others to thank you for them?
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 12:34 AM
1

I’m not trying to make you feel worse but think of it this way, you’d be eating pavement while the cops cuff you (if you had wave the gun at her). I don’t know what the hell the cops were thinking suggesting you leave your home. That’s insane. She has potential for violence and she knows where to find you and your family. She’s used to getting her way and every time someone rewards her terrible behaviour, that makes her more entitled. A woman pulling a trigger is just as deadly as a man. Don’t u…
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 09:18 PM
3

She cheats on you. She extorts money from you and your family. She manipulates and verbally abuses you. She destroys your property…And she pointed a gun at you.. That’s terrifying. You got a lot going on but my advice to you is stay the hell away from her. Her behaviours are escalating and she’s impulsive. Be safe and get her the hell out of your house and your life as soon as you can. You don’t need to be a “husband shot by wife” news headline. Take care of yourself, OP
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 09:12 PM
5

Dude, don’t do it Don’t even think it. My father ended up killing himself by not treating his very treatable disease. My life was not enhanced by him ending his. Your girls lives won’t be either. Smarten up.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 02:43 AM
13

You’re grieving. You’ve had a loss and it’s painful. It wasn’t the marriage of your dreams but it was yours. And now it’s not. It’s okay that it’s hard right now. It would probably be weird if it wasn’t. But it does get easier. Take care of yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/24 02:23 AM
4

Oh sweet Jesus. That’s a lot. I’m sorry for what’s happening to you. I will suggest something but please only consider it if you can manage it. Stop giving her money for rent in a place you don’t live in. Then you can get a cheap rent-by-the-week room so you have somewhere to live. My thought is she’ll feel the pinch of not getting your free rent money and file for divorce so you can pay child support. But please, only do this if it makes sense for you. I know you only wanted people to talk to b…
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 07:14 PM
2

You know, the funny thing about bullies is they end up doing it over and over again. This is a high-pressure situation so she’ll throw a fit. The lawyer will stick around until she treats him like the help and he’ll be gone.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/24 04:30 AM
1

So, I used to work with folks who had committed violent crimes (murder, sexual assault, what have you). When we did risk assessments for hearings, we scored both static and dynamic factors. Static factors are historical facts that can't be changed - child neglect, substance use, diagnosed with mental health condition. Dynamic factors are changeable and affect the static factors. For example, a strong support network, med compliance, good insight. These things can be important predictors of succe…
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 07:20 PM
6

This is how I screen men. I’ve changed some things to suit my audience: Listen to how they talk about other people. Does she talk a lot about how her friends “done her wrong”? Doss she stop/start friendships because they're “toxic” or “narcissistic.” (or whatever). How does she talk about her past romantic relationships? Is she always a victim? Or can she take responsibility for her part? Can she solve a fucking problem? Listen to her stories. When she has a problem at work - is she able to gath…
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 06:40 PM
1

So, I am seeing this man who comes from a place where men of a certain age build their identities around providing and protecting their families. I want him to find meaning in providing/protecting but it’s terrible if those things define him. It’s my goal to de-program him a bit. He’s worth more than what he can give me and he should know that. And I hope does everyone else here knows that too. Take care of yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 04:15 AM
2

I’ve read a lot of posts here. And a lot of comments. There are a lot of common threads running through people’s stories. Lots of frustration and anger. Lots of confusion. Divorced folks wondering why they had no idea it was coming while their STBX is already moving on in some relarionship. Also wondering why they never get to see their kids. Or why their sole purpose in life is to be an ATM for ex-spouse. It’s easy to say this or that individual needs to adapt to his new reality but I think it’…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 05:06 AM
2

Emotions can be strong but… I had my daughter quite young. Her father and I were still in college at the time. After we broke up, we used a pitcher of beer to solve our child-related disagreements. Basically we'd go out and and by the time we finished the pitcher, we needed a plan to managed the problem. It's redneck as hell but it served us well for a long time. I don't know why some people’s partner go from “love of my life” to emotional terrorists. One thing I can say, after my daughter’s fat…
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 08:36 PM
2

Nah, don’t worry about the no kids if she has a PhD. That kind of schooling is all-consuming. Good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/24 04:48 AM
12

I read this somewhere: “I would rather adjust my life to your absence, than adjust my boundaries to accommodate your disrespect.” You might pick different words but I can’t think of a better message for your situation
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 02:12 AM
1

Huh, this is interesting. The psychology of how we try to hide interest in someone by talking trash about them. It’s kind of childish but the logic is sound. However, I will argue this is more about a terrible human being, not a sociopathic woman. I never take free coffee from people I don’t respect and talk to them because I “feel sorry” for them. AND then laugh about how pathetic they are behind their back. This is bullshit. I am sorry if this is overstepping but can I make a suggestion? Don’t…
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 06:58 PM
2

Oof, that’s rough. I can see why you have… thoughts and feelings about what happened. It sounds like you feel your choice was taken from you when your ex moved two hours away. Divorce is a very financially driven process and - rightly or wrongly - it twists people up. What’s important here is your children love you and you love them. Don’t let what happened in court taint that ever. All that other shit with your ex, the boyfriend, the money - it doesn’t matter. Only your children matter. Sounds …
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 05:14 AM
3

Opponent was the first thing that came to mind but I wondered if it was too harsh. But I see where you’re coming from but… I had another friend whose partner moved into a women’s shelter after their separation. He maintained nothing had happened and I never knew him to be verbally or physically confrontational. He said she did this to get an upper hand in the custody battle. I’ll never know what actually what happened but it poisoned him. What I can tell you is a decade later, he was still very …
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 05:12 AM
5

You said it so much better than I did. My target audience was very entrenched in “But she’s my wife…” so I was extra blunt. Thanks for rounding it out.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 04:42 AM
10

I have a friend going through the initial stages of separation and it’s looking like it’s going to be ugly. She is the mother of his child and he wants to believe the best about her. One thing I’ve told him and will tell him again: she is not your wife anymore. She is not your friend. She doesn’t have your best interests at heart. You need to be strategic and lean into the divorce process. Be fair but mind your boundaries. The decisions you make now will have a serious impact on your life. Maybe…
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 04:14 AM
0

Hmmm… I’ve been divorced but I’m not a man. Personally, I could never delete pictures but I couldn’t look at them. I put them away out of sight and now it feels like a lifetime ago. OP, do whatever is best for you but take your time when making the decision. You can’t undo it.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 03:56 AM
1

I agree 100%. If you read further down, we learn this woman had previously lost her husband (and father of her children) in death. That is a profound loss. But later she chooses to say goodbye in a message about a podcast. She knows loss but she still chose to do that. Breakups are messy but the point is we can choose to end relationships with the dignity and respect. But no, too often it ends with denial and disconnection with ourselves and each other. New-Amoeba, what happened to you was shitt…
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 05:48 PM
13

You guys together 14 months and she listens to a podcast and text-breaks up with you? Jesus Christ. I hope she doesn’t run into some kind of cult cuz she suggestible af.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 03:57 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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