TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Etnies419 Archive

View 2 posts and 41 comments by Etnies419 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
86

Etnies419/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 08:06 PM
4

Etnies419/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 07:01 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
4

I can't really speak to anything else in the post, but I will say that you absolutely need to do whatever you can to find yourself some legal representation. This is your one chance at making sure your daughter is in your life, and you don't want to mess that up by slipping up in court/legal processes.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/26 10:32 AM
2

Document everything regarding the drug use, before shit hits the fan. It will be a huge asset to you if/when things wind up in court.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 03:38 PM
15

And who are you to know that I haven't done self reflection? Please enlighten me.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 12:55 AM
8

>would end up not making some of the meals Yup, and then she'd get mad because we were wasting money and throwing out food.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 08:35 PM
2

>Our fights are 90% her rambling and cutting me off mid sentence Man that sounds exactly like how my ex was. We would be in an argument, and she would constantly cut me off whenever I was trying to explain my side or how I was feeling. I would say "can you please just let me say my part?" and she would let me talk for like 30 seconds before cutting me off again. I actually used to have recurring nightmares about not being able to explain things to people because they wouldn't let me talk. It was…
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 03:30 PM
6

Be the bigger person. Even if it's just a slight cold, you don't want to be around newborns while sick if it's avoidable. Tell them "yeah I'm getting over a cold and want to make sure the babies are safe. Let's give it a few more days so I can come visit without worries."
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/25 04:12 PM
13

Am I the only one who looks at the toilet before I use it? I don't think I've ever gone to the bathroom and just blindly sat down without looking at it first lol. Then again, I also always close the lid to keep poo particles from spraying out when I flush, so I'm trained to open the lid first before going.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/25 07:41 PM
9

Yup, and either way you'll be the villain in her eyes. Don't do the things she wants you to do? "Wow he's such an asshole, I'm so justified in leaving him because he couldn't even do what I asked him to do." Do the things she wants you to do? "Wow, it took filing for divorce for him to finally do the things I wanted him to do, I'm so justified in leaving him because I can't live with someone like that." It's over, you can't win with her. So make sure you win with yourself and your son.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/25 04:48 PM
4

There are much easier ways to have secret conversations with someone than hiding information in email source code. While the emails sound weird, I would find it very unlikely that those alone are evidence that she's cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 07:55 AM
6

Had a very similar situation with my ex. She went out one night and came back acting different, but just said she had a bad night out. She didn't want to go into more detail, and I didn't really push. 3 years later she's going to therapy, and she tells me that she had been assaulted that night. And that she thought she had made a mistake that night until her therapist told her she was actually assaulted. I had very similar emotions, sadness for what she experienced, but also anger that she didn'…
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/25 10:12 AM
7

Met the woman I've been seeing for close to a year now on Hinge. Prior to her I had gotten some other decent matches and conversation on Hinge as well.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 11:23 AM
6

I had almost the exact same scenario happen with me. There was a part of me that wanted kids, but I was very afraid of the prospect, and tended to shut down when the subject came up because I knew she really wanted kids. On top of that, I didn't feel comfortable with the job I had and the hours I worked that I could be the father I needed to be, so I knew that needed to change first. It took some time, but I finally got a job that I felt good about and hours that were normal (not grocery store b…
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/25 10:13 PM
3

I hear you with the dirty dishes. My ex would constantly come home with her dirty lunch containers, and just toss them in the sink with food and sauce just sitting there. I would always tell her that I didn't mind washing the dishes, but at the very least could she soak them with soapy water so they don't get disgusting. But even that was too much of an ask, and she'd get mad at me for that.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/25 12:53 PM
6

After I found out she was cheating on me. Still wanted to make it work, and asked if she was still interested in going to counseling. She replied "I'd be willing to go to one session, for closure." Cancelled the appointment right then and filed for divorce. I knew she was no longer interested in even trying to make it work.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/25 06:49 PM
13

Oof, just saw the one comment that basically said: "Marriage is awful because if you fall for someone else when you're unmarried you can just leave your current romantic partner for them. But when you're married then you have to go through the whole divorce process and it's not as easy" 😬
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/25 12:16 PM
2

Despite their ages, they're still "kids". You can't force them to act or feel a certain way. All you can do is try to be a good role model and hope they follow your example. I remember a time when I was around the same age. My father got mad at me because I didn't get him a birthday present. I didn't really see him too much, and barely had any money, so a card was all I could really do. Knowing that he was upset about something material like that made me even angrier about the situation. Don't t…
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/25 05:08 PM
2

I was in a very similar situation, but didn't want to take the advice that everyone gave me. I needed to learn it for myself. Ex was still living with the family that took her in (e.g. her affair partner and his wife and children), but wanted to start talking again and see how things went. I begged her to come back and try to work things out, but she had no interest in doing that. In hindsight I realize she just wanted me as a backup plan when things didn't go as she planned with the first AP, a…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/25 05:46 PM
2

Similar for me. She went through a period where she was extremely stressed out with work; I stood by her and tried to support her the best that I could while she worked through it. When I went through a rough period where I was stressed out about work, she decided she didn't want that in her life and decided to leave for someone who would coddle her.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/25 12:50 PM
6

One thing I've learned with dating apps is that they're designed to get you to pay/keep you paying. And if you stop interacting, after a while they'll try to pull you back in. I wouldn't get any matches, so I stopped checking the apps for a couple of weeks. After a bit, I'd start getting more and more notifications about people sending me likes.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/25 07:19 AM
2

Bought skittles Hell yeah dude
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/25 09:40 AM
5

Yup, it'll be a long process, but you'll come out better for it in the end. I'm still somewhere in the middle myself. The one thing I keep reminding myself when I'm not feeling great about things is that she jumped to someone new who will give her the things she wants until she gets bored of him, or he gets bored of her. I'm putting in the hard work to earn my position in life for myself. It may seem like it's going slower, or that she came out with the better end, but I know that I'm doing thin…
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/25 06:08 PM
4

Another one: Controlling The first big argument my ex and I had while she was in college, she wanted to take a break to "experience being single" and maybe get back together after she graduated. I told her no, if she wanted to be be with me then choose me, if not then we're done. I came to find out years later that she held a grudge against me the whole time because I was "controlling her body" by not letting her experience being single, but she'll swear up and down she had no intentions of slee…
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/24 11:14 PM
19

Absolutely. I had been conditioned towards thinking that you can't enjoy anything because you always need to be working towards the next thing. Got that new couch we wanted? Well we can't enjoy it because we have to save up for a new coffee table. Buy a new coffee table? Now we've spent too much money and need to save more. Got a new job? Can't enjoy the moment in life because now you need to find a bigger place to live. Find a bigger place? Well you can't enjoy that because you have to plan for…
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 12:26 AM
4

Man reading these stories make me glad I never got a dog like my wife wanted. Not because I didn't want a dog, but because I knew I wasn't in a proper situation (between work and other things) to take care of a dog, and deep down I knew she wouldn't even though she said she would. This woman would get pissed off at losing the slightest amount of sleep, but I was supposed to believe she would be willing to get up in the middle of the night to take the dog out? The same woman who would constantly …
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 06:50 PM
12

She had told me about 2 weeks prior that she wanted to do counseling. I agreed that would be a good idea, and did everything I could to set that up and work on the issues she had brought up to me. During this time she had been spending more and more time after work with two male coworkers, and I started to get suspicious. One morning (Oct. 26, I'll never forget that date), she was taking a shower before work and her phone was on the nightstand. I couldn't shake the feeling that something was up,…
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 08:04 AM
2

Same with me and shellfish. Ex was allergic to it, so I avoided it as much as possible. If I ate any I would rinse my mouth out with mouthwash as soon as possible to try to clean it. It got to the point where I felt like my mouth was dirty if I ate shellfish. I ate so much shellfish after she left, it took me a while to stop feeling like I was dirty and needed to clean after eating it.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 11:27 PM
1

No, this was the coworker that she cheated on me with. But still enough for me to realize where her true priorities were.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/24 06:15 PM
3

I honestly think they spend months or years working up in their head a scenario that makes them feel OK to leave. This was definitely the case at the end for me. She tells me she wants us to do counseling, I say let's do it, I'll set it up. Then she's upset because it's too far out in the future. Well sorry but I can't help that appointments are already booked. Then I find out she cheated on me. As soon as I confront her about it she starts pulling her bags out to pack. I say "oh what you're lea…
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/24 01:13 AM
7

When she told me that having children was the only way she would find happiness in life, and if she couldn't have children she felt like she might kill herself. I made the "mistake" of trying to get her to find things in her life to be happy about before having a child, since that is an extremely unfair burden to place on a child, expecting your only source of happiness to come from them. I thank God every day that I listened to my gut and didn't have children with her.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/24 07:20 AM
4

How familiar that sounds. I found out my STBXW has been holding resentment since we first started dating because she wanted to take a break, and I told her I wasn't ok with that, either choose to be with me or not. Apparently that was me being controlling of her by not letting her experience being single...
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/24 04:48 PM
3

No kids here, moved a few states away to be near family and for a good job opportunity. Some days I feel like I made the wrong choice because I left the friends I had where I used to live, and that area was home to me for 7 years, but I also know that having a better career opportunity will be best for me in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/24 08:07 AM
6

Lol, mine called me controlling as we were separating because after about 3 months of dating, while she was away at college she wanted to "experience being single" but still wanted me to be around when she came back. I told her she could do what she wanted, but I wasn't ok with that and if that's what she wanted to do I wouldn't be there for her afterwards. Well that was me being controlling by not letting her explore her options, and also being controlling of her body (but she flipped out at me…
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/24 08:44 PM
7

100% this. Mine cheated, left to live with her affair family, and said she felt we needed a divorce. So I filed for divorce. Well all of a sudden I was the bad guy who filed for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 08:58 PM
3

That's what I did. I knew I needed to get in some type of routine. Started off just doing a few sets of pushups, bicep curls, squats, and sit-ups, alternating two each day. Enough to make me feel like I was doing something, but not so much that I felt like I was carving out a huge chunk of time. Took me 15-20 minutes each day. Now I'm going to the gym 6-7 days a week now that I've gotten into a routine.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/24 12:56 AM
4

Lol, mine said "I was trying to tell you!" as if that makes cheating ok...
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/24 10:24 PM
3

I also noticed that after the fights, it was me initiating the makeup and doing the apologizing. This was me in my marriage. And then my ex had the balls to say "we're so good when we have arguments, we always try to make each other feel better." And she had me believing it too, even though I was the one who was putting myself aside to make her feel better...
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/24 10:55 AM
7

They hate making decisions, but love to criticize the decisions you make.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/24 12:06 AM
6

You'll get there. And when you do, let it happen. Let yourself feel all of the emotions that come to you. It sucks and it's painful and you'll hate it, but letting yourself feel those emotions and work through them is going to help you in the long run.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 10:55 AM
14

Man that describes my STBXW to the tee... Always concerned about what the next goal is, never content to just relax and enjoy the moment. Like I get wanting to have goals but you have to give yourself some time to relax.
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/23 11:18 PM
8

As much as I am trying my hardest to put it out of my mind, I can't help but look forward to the day when I hear that it's over between my STBXW and the AP. Especially becuase she has moved in with him, his wife, their two year old daughter, and another child soon to come, to have a polygamous relationship with them, and have her own child with them too. And I know that with her desperate need for attention, this situation won't last long, which is why I'm moving 6 hours away so I'm long gone wh…
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 07:42 AM
20

Going hiking. STBXW was always afraid whenever we'd go (what if there's a bear, what if we got shot by a hunter?). It was only enjoyable if it was the perfect temperature, otherwise she'd be miserable if it was too hot or too cold. And we couldn't go very far because she'd get tired instantly. Now I'm free to go when and where I want, and enjoy it to the extent that I want to.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/23 01:18 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter