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Ever-learning271 Archive

View 0 posts and 223 comments by Ever-learning271 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

Sometimes it’s subtle, other times it’s obvious…does she lash out, withhold sex as punishment or leverage? These are toxic behaviors, not competition…learn the difference to protect yourself, your heart. My wife started subtle & at times (typically behind closed doors) became more overt then acted like nothing happened the next day. I’m out 1 full year now (prior 1yr separated) and I am just now feeling peace & conviction that she doesn’t deserve me and I didn’t deserve her abuse…I’m not a victi…
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/23 03:44 AM
7

Great share, thank you! I’m one year post D after 21 yrs married (27 together) and a 13yr old son. What you have endured is tremendous pain and a shift of (human) psyche that only Divorced men understand as women feel it differently. It takes extraordinary strength to climb out of this hell-hole alone so be kind to yourself. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/23 02:26 AM
1

Great advice👍
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/23 12:39 PM
3

Sorry to hear you are going through this difficult time brother; best advice is to not tell her a thing of your plans, talk to a lawyer (don’t hire yet), consult with the lawyers you don’t want her to get (if you do this she can’t hire them), then figure out your strategy. Don’t leave your home if you want it, stand your ground and don’t complicate things…fight for the kids or keep it 50/50 at least (helps with child support costs)…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/23 12:38 PM
2

Been there myself sir…she Will resent you for giving more love to your (collectively) child over her…mark me! I now am a Divorced Physician and grateful for it☮️
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/23 12:12 PM
5

GET OUT! I was in college when my then live-in girlfriend (of 3 yrs) asked/demanded me to move out so we can separate…after 3 months she came to my new place talking bout mistakes and how WE didn’t give it a fair trial and somehow (I can not recall how) I conceded and we made up……FAST FWD 21yrs and we were married over 20 with an 11yr old son and I found out she was on dating apps before she asked/demanded we separate (AGAIN!!!) Divorced and happy now, but rough road to get there….my advice is t…
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/23 12:06 PM
13

Get to a gym or set one up in your house, play golf or go for walks at nearby trails/parks, find a support group or therapist, read, read, read self help books….focus on YOU! Good Luck❤️‍🩹 welcome to freedom!
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/23 07:44 PM
2

The less you say, the better! Truth always finds a way to surface on its own….let it all out to a very tight & trustworthy best-friend/family member and especially your therapist…if you don’t have one, I’d consider getting one as it truly helps you and allows you to be the Best dad you can be…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/23 12:10 PM
2

Not sure of your laws, not an attorney but I feel you’d only be responsible for splitting property (if she has proof it’s hers) and for child support…. Unless she’s on the house deed, mortgage or gave you money for down payment, she’s not even entitled to the home since the Divorce was already settled.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/23 04:40 PM
1

Here, here! You’ve got the insights…great advice! Wishing you a fulfilled life❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/23 12:05 PM
3

Great advice, sorry bout how you got taken…thanks for sharing & Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/23 11:57 AM
11

In America: if you are a man, prepare to get screwed! If you are a woman, prepare to be told the man “owes” you more than you should be entitled to and to lie and exaggerate. Then there is the pain and agony of losing control of all the proceedings because of “the laws”. I will never understand how some men go through this multiple times when I wish I hadn’t ever had to experience it…it changes you! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/23 11:53 AM
2

Awesome points! Thank you for your post and enjoy your freedom…I’m getting there❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/23 05:35 PM
6

She’s only special if you make her that…otherwise she’s just a woman who happens to be the mother of your children 👍
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/23 03:18 PM
4

It comes from YOU, not to you! I am at peace with the knowledge she can’t hurt me unless I allow it (meaning give a shit); I stay active, focus on self-care, travel as I can (alone, w/son or with friends) and have dated (ladies I’ve met through others) but some people (rarely) have luck on dating apps. Redefine yourself! Hope this helps❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/23 03:16 PM
9

Sorry to hear brother…life is better without them & their mental anguish..Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/23 03:02 PM
6

The emotions you convey in what you’ve written are very similar to what I’ve experienced with my Ex…we were separated 5mo (after 21yr marriage) when I found out the truth; told her I will not tolerate the disrespect and that we need to Divorce…we were best friends & had a great sex life but she always demanded more (material things) w/o satisfaction… It’s a year since the Divorce & I am happier, no walking on eggshells, no worry of her infidelity and cultivating an awesome father/son relationshi…
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/23 02:59 PM
2

No…he will not change!
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/23 11:50 AM
2

He wants you back to finish the job, to continue your abuse! Like a cat playing with a mouse before the kill…sometimes the mouse gets away but is left all mangled and hurt; don’t be that mouse, don’t go back to that! On how he feels—you want to get to a place where you don’t care, indifference! Since you asked, NC is showing him you are alright without him, you can make it on your own and he CAN lose you plus he’s nervous about what you are telling others about him—all superficial BTW. An abusiv…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/23 11:48 AM
4

All our experiences sound so f’n similar….I wonder if there isn’t a huge f’n experiment being done on all of us since the Covid escapade …social networking mindfuck of some sort….I have been sober since my old lady lost it 2yrs ago but she began even sooner…I’m out (not without deep hurt & trust issues) but I’m way better and enjoying the new single life @52 …Good Luck all❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/23 06:30 PM
4

Sorry to hear brother…it will and does get better after the initial agony….gotta force yourself to “feel” through it, as painful as it is, that is what helps the hurt pass (crazy stuff, I know)… Now even tougher…she was already gone before you separated; women typically “check out” before they get the strength to leave….Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/23 09:28 PM
14

I def got baboozled into the loop…sex frequency dropped post marriage, even more post baby….more demands as the years progressed and “never” happy or satisfied….she moved out, we separated, she cheated then we agreed on Divorce. I’m a year out and happier, def more educated on marriage and Narcissism/Borderline Personality Disorders…Men:never marry!
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/23 12:48 AM
2

It’s alarming how much you will learn so pace yourself…may trigger some emotions❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/23 01:53 PM
3

Yes! Look up Narcissism…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/23 04:09 PM
6

Don’t go back to abuse…it’s not the first time and you will never know the truth at this point…you lose Trust, Respect and Love all together….be strong and move-on; you owe it to yourself, not anyone else. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/23 10:31 PM
3

Self-care; rumination makes this difficult at times but ultimately I need to be ME for me & my kid…no woman I have met gives me grounds to change my focus yet and given the quality of women thus far, I am not hopeful. I’m happy and well as myself, alone but not lonely. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/23 02:38 PM
5

Nothing prepares you for the loneliness, hurt and deep sadness but what I learned is that these are emotions not permanent conditions…Emotions by nature alone are fleeting, typically lasting 20 minutes unless YOU belabor them or fester…. The trick or goal is to not remain in that state for too long; change your focus, move your body, get out of the house—change that emotion to feel another until you achieve empowerment, this is when you can control/manipulate your emotions. Before all this thoug…
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/23 01:03 PM
5

Thank you! Sincerely wishing you good fortune, a well deserved life! ☮️
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/23 08:24 PM
2

In all, $6000 here for legal but the Divorce cost me more in settlement; no Alimony or child support-helps that we mediated but she stretched it out some. (MA-USA)
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/23 08:20 PM
9

As I sit here in a hotel lobby in Montréal Canada, I’m reading these terrific shares from fellow brothers who made the choice (voluntarily or involuntarily) to Divorce and move on, to level up; you give me hope! I’ve been divorced nearly a year after 22yrs of marriage and a sweet 13 yr old son because she wasn’t happy; nothing was ever “enough” for her. In the end we separated then she cheated (however I believe she had in the past also but w/o proof). I am a physician for the past 25 yrs and ow…
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/23 08:03 PM
1

You did all you could? Then focus on your child and your health, the rest will fall into place as it should…don’t give in and stand up for yourself (with legal advice) , but change that focus & move up! It hurts like hell but it’s worth it! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/23 02:27 PM
1

Very deep and exceptional advice good man! Divorce often puts us in a dark place but your vision and goal setting approach give great solace to what is…it comes from within and focus on what you can control, accept what you can’t control for what it is ..life’s lessons are difficult and painful at times which makes it oh so beautiful also. Good Luck men❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/23 08:54 AM
4

Married in 2000, son in 2010 and we began to fall apart around 2017 when her demands & ultimatums kept coming…I suspect emotional infidelity began about that time..she moved out in mid 2021 & we were Divorced by Nov ‘22. I was crushed because we’ve been together 27yrs…but the freedom and peace now, priceless! Good Luck to you all❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/23 01:49 AM
1

Hard day but future is bright and full of hope & joy brother! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/23 09:36 PM
5

Thanks for this brother..❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/23 12:31 AM
9

Love it! Glad you are in a good place; this shows hope for those that are early on in their freedom quest…typically unprovoked! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/23 03:04 PM
4

I’m nearly 2yrs out (after 27yrs & 1 son) and it still hurts but much less than when I found out about the infidelity…you will never get closure from her (as they lie) so you make your own:don’t tolerate contempt, cheating, and abuse! She crossed a line and you can’t have her cross back unless you want more of the same….and it hurts even worse after each take-back (it’s been proven and affirmed by many)…you are better off without her and your relationship with your kids will be even better becau…
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/23 03:36 PM
5

Good Luck brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/23 03:28 PM
4

Brother, it does get better when you get past “her”…she’s got to just be the mother of your kids, that’s all! When you get there, your life will explode into Peace, Balance and an open-world for you; your life begins anew! Still gotta work on self-care and being kind to yourself… Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/23 03:26 PM
14

Damn brother, she is one cold individual…not a person, individual! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/23 03:20 PM
2

Truly heartbreaking, but fuck! How can they be so sneaky so well…I really never saw it coming !
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 08:40 PM
5

…oh, to add! Eve deceived and manipulated Adam in the Bible to eat the apple…why are we expecting differently now…I NEVER REALIZED IT til Divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 06:03 PM
9

F’n cold hearted they are…
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 05:59 PM
3

Same here
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 05:57 PM
4

My Ex (Narc) was on Dating Apps 2 days after I found out she was DMing men through Insta…that was a year BEFORE our divorce papers were signed. She was already living with a guy (diff from the DM guy) 1 month before we signed. Married 21 years and Yup, some move very quick! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/23 05:56 PM
1

Praying for ya…you can still part but be involved in your boys’ lives; 50/50 works for time with the kiddos plus it’s w/o her distracting them…they are resilient! Good Luck brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/23 06:08 PM
2

As I say…you can do this…focus on self-care, meditate, eat well, no booze…it sucks for a while but remember you control your life now, not someone else…LIVE IT! Good luck brothers❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/23 12:47 PM
9

Is it the Era, is it the Social Networking, is it temporary or is it permanent??? All these questions and more will flow through you as you ruminate…some say rumination is bad, some therapists believe rumination helps avoid depression….I say, you feel what you feel, so feel it; use the pain to propel your independence.. Note her actions over her words, trust your gut, focus on Self-care and your kids and you will pull yourself out of this hell…you got this! You deserve someone who stays, not som…
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 02:11 AM
1

So sorry to hear it brother! Stick to your boundaries and don’t accept less…you got this! Happiness and peace await you after the hell of betrayal…focus on the good in life. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/23 03:15 PM
2

Yeah, I feel ya! I learned to “work through” the sadness with meditation and it actually helps! Some days you wake and think, what the fuck just happened? Others…you realize (don’t hate me for using this) it’s the New Normal…life is tough…Good Luck Brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/23 01:06 PM
3

Nearly 1year post Divorce (2since separation), and I still feel it intermittently but def better and more tolerable now—not sure if it ends but does improve👍 We were together 27years.Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/23 05:29 PM
5

They can encourage all they want but it is up to your wife in the end if she betrays you; her doing, no one else: remember that! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/23 05:47 PM
1

Good Luck❤️‍🩹 thanks for sharing!
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/23 11:05 AM
1

Hell yeah! Once broken, twice shy as the song says but not a problem….self preservation and peace my brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/23 11:05 AM
3

Good Luck brother…it’s a long lonely road through recovery, but totally doable…you come out stronger and more independent!❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/23 02:38 AM
5

If it happens, and most likely won’t, DON’T DO IT! Get through the pain, focus on you and move up, move forward…a new and better life❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 09:58 PM
11

That’s about right….yep…pretty much sums it up👍
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/23 03:00 PM
1

This is true! That thing that bonded you is gone, she destroyed that! Interesting how trust, love and respect are out the window in a betrayal…Dante (in the Inferno) rated it deep in the realms of hell near Satan…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 04:22 PM
1

Sorry to hear that, I pray your relationships with your kids improve…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 04:18 PM
2

I’m doing great now (nearly 2yrs out), thanks for asking! I think I’ve actually got some hair growing back..LOL! Blessings to ya!
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 02:14 PM
2

Oddly, I think it’s the status (at the time) also…then turns into, “I’ve done that, so who/what’s next”?
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 02:08 PM
1

Perhaps a momentary lapse of reason but nonetheless unhealthy!
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 02:06 PM
1

Sorry you are still hurting and thanks for sharing❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 02:04 PM
1

It all hurts deeply when they take a good part of you away with them…unfair, but allows for (your) growth ❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 02:02 PM
1

..actions over words👍 Words lie, actions don’t and sadly he will never know!
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 01:56 PM
1

AMEN brother! Glad you are healing❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 01:51 PM
0

That person you thought she was, that you wanted her to be, is gone! You have the kids (in your life)-you have your family still and they need you! You DON’T need her👍
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 01:49 PM
1

Sorry to hear you are experiencing this agony brother…similar situation with me after 22years of marriage (together 27years)…. I don’t know you, haven’t met you but from therapy and others I’ve learned it was a “Long Term” Narcissist’s game we were in… They are broken women, abused in childhood, and taking it out on us who empathize with their “endless” wants and needs….never satisfied and never will be! Sad that it takes so long for us to see it, but it will reveal itself to you in the coming d…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 01:40 PM
2

“Bare minimum” by whose standards?…so subjective and an excuse to validate her actions; that was for her! I’ve read that you will never be “good enough” for the wrong person..truth! The tough part is that we were “good enough” for so many years, then nothing….nada…zilch! Their scheming and planning before discarding you prepared them but then they “sprung it on you” out of nowhere… You are now in the fog, not knowing what really went wrong, your future that was planned, dead in the water now… Yo…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 01:09 PM
2

I believe if this were true, Dogs would not be man’s best friend…just sayin! Agree to disagree👍
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/23 01:51 PM
2

My Ex Narc began working out w/weights (never did before) AFTER working at a gym, left that job & hired a trainer via I-net and continued to workout @ another gym all while we were still married then 3yrs later told me she needed space and got her own apt. 5mo later I find she is DMing some dude, I demand we divorce because I won’t tolerate cheating, and she proceeds to go on dating apps but 2days later… We were divorced 1yr later after 21 years of marriage, a 12 y/o son and 27years as “best fri…
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/23 04:28 AM
4

We are MEN; we serve our purpose and move on—nothing more, nothing less!
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/23 03:55 PM
2

Painful truth! Amazing we can still care for those who hurt us…def better than hatred👍
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/23 11:24 AM
2

Good Luck❤️‍🩹 Sadly whatever she tells you will not be the truth regarding the cheating…know that women disengage/detach months or years before they cheat & typically connect emotionally before sexually…don’t shoot the messenger! Been there bra..praying for ya ❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/23 01:10 AM
2

Oh yeah, my (ex) wife of 21 years was this way! I naively thought I could make her happy & fulfill her wants and needs…with no success; the bar just kept being raised. You can only do so much then you must realize your futility. I’m finally free…and HAPPY!
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/23 11:50 PM
1

Nothing about Divorce is inexpensive, go with the most direct, quickest and if she doesn’t contest, file on your own. The less attorney’s fees, the better!
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 03:04 PM
4

Yes…depends on how/why though. If it was due to her infidelity, more likely not!
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 02:55 PM
1

Amen my brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 09:29 PM
1

Sorry to hear of your pain…It’s amazing how many different emotions we experience throughout Divorce…we can’t put ourselves in the other side’s shoes (cuz we aren’t the assholes who destroyed the marriage) so we don’t experience those; however, loneliness is definitely painful and it doesn’t help that it’s typically in the late hours. Other than living through it, there is no quick remedy but I find watching comedic shows or reading funny stories does help ease the burden if a friend or family m…
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/23 01:41 PM
4

Right on the money in most cases brother..pun intended! Good Luck everyone❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 01:10 AM
2

Sorry you are going through this; that you are sad and in pain. It may sound absurd, but these are temporary emotions unless you continue to fuel them…you! May not be what you want to hear right now, but it IS what you need to hear…you will never fully gain understanding because you can’t read her mind and she will never be honest with you…her betrayal makes that obvious! To recover and heal, and you will heal (been there too—22 yr marriage & son), you must focus on your health, your son and his…
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/23 11:54 AM
4

Sorry to hear…I know you love her but she is toxic to you and the children unless she helps herself…I was married 22 years when the Divorce was finalized, she was already living with a new guy and introduced him to our son before we signed; learned much about her I didn’t know (as they lie and you’ll never know all)….follow your gut, focus on yourself and the kids…I think in your heart you already know. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/23 03:07 AM
1

Hey, I know it! I’ve dealt with (and still do on occasion) my own for many years…lies for years and I had no clue due to blind love…4 years ago I learned about boundaries and that is what helped me stand my ground through the Divorce…you said you don’t believe in divorce but if she’s a Narc, this is your only true out or she will destroy you…not smarter, but more ruthless than you or I. God bless ya…heal, focus on you and the kids and crush her through your success…maybe not today, but in the en…
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 02:29 AM
1

..damn that’s harsh…WTF! Why and how does this happen?…and frequently too! Keep your head held high for those kiddos!
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 10:07 PM
3

Of course! Just be safe, focus on you as this is a temporary situation (but feels permanent) and you will heal and recover…not sayin it’s gonna be easy but you do heal…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 12:43 AM
6

Sorry to hear bra, fucking sucks! Don’t try to understand it, you’ll never get in her head! May not be over(still early) but search your deepest feelings as to if it’s best to move on or not…as others have said, you are young (I’m healing @ 52 (22yrs married)..just learned I never truly knew her..you will heal, life does improve if you focus on you, your health, what you want & need…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 12:40 AM
19

Do not share your plans with her…Get your legal advice through the military lawyers…may be free or at least reduced, before you retire! Don’t leave your dwelling, stand your ground; personally…focus on yourself, exercise, don’t booze, and focus on your kids…all should work out! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 01:18 AM
1

Sorry to hear this bra…it is very sad and heartbreaking when a love dies and a relationship goes to shit…you both play a role but eventually you have to choose if it’s worth it to keep trying…at times it really isn’t and that F’n hurts to admit. I wish you (both) luck and recommend you focus on you, healing by eating right, exercising like a gladiator, meditating like a monk and keeping positive…I assure you, it does get better! (Me:married 22 years, divorced 1 now with a 13y/o son -jt custody)……
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 12:26 AM
7

Divorce sucks, bottom line! Def not in the male vantage-pt but it IS an out! You get to be you again and live as you choose…don’t wanna take out the trash, don’t….wanna get a motorcycle (if you can afford it), get it….you are in control now; don’t need permission or validation. Focus on you, heal from the betrayal and pain, take your licks and move forward….if a woman comes into your life that you’d like to spend time with, bang, or just talk too…do it but don’t offer your control or freedom eve…
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 10:49 PM
2

Nothing gonna be easy about it…if it’s broken w/o a fix (and this does happen), then it’s best to Divorce and move-on; no amount of counseling will do, Love alone won’t fix it either….Both need to be working toward the same goal but that shred of doubt that lingers is enough to cause irreversible tremendous distrust and contempt. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 12:58 AM
1

Sorry to hear it…in MA, if it’s contested, mediation is no longer an option. Good Luck! Again, focus on you healing, dating will happen when ready but I wouldn’t suggest rushing into it as you’ll make similar mistakes and moves..❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/23 01:46 AM
12

You are not broken, your relationship is! It takes 2, remember that! I’ve been through it (after 21yr marriage)…on the other side now but didn’t believe/couldn’t believe it would happen…it does! You’ll heal…focus on yourself with self-care, exercise, meditation, nature walks…play with the kids when available…read! Until you “feel through” the pain and accept you deserve the best, not “better”, “The Best!”….you will not let yourself move-on! Allow yourself the grace to live your life as you want,…
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/23 10:12 PM
1

I’m in MA…went through mediation under my advisement (she’s a Narc) stressed it was best for the benefit of our son (so as not to stress him with Divorce Court) and that focus helped in convincing her (we were married for 21years/11 y/o son). Could have finished it in 3months/3 sessions but she dragged changes and amendments to the agreement many times-I feel it was because she was doubting herself. We each had attorneys for advice only, the mediator (a neutral attorney) helped with reaching agr…
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/23 09:55 PM
2

Absolutely normal stuff during an abnormal experience….you shouldn’t have to go through this but she doesn’t care…It does get better! The anxiety decreases, your life improves in time…it is all part of your healing process! Focus on you, self-care, meditation, walks in nature… Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 01:09 PM
2

They lie, they lie, they lie….all I’m gonna say! Mind your wallet, your back and your heart…the betrayal is not yet revealed…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 03:45 AM
2

Good Luck to ya, thanks for sharing❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 03:18 PM
3

It hurts tremendously, mediation will tug at tour heartstrings throughout…dig your heels in, fight the good fight & don’t “give in” on everything, give some “pushback”…Focus on you & the kids and YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 01:20 PM
5

Glad you learned through others rather than enduring this yourself…the pain of losing her is bad enough, but then when she becomes someone else..or worse, vindictive toward you with contempt…that is a pain and anger emotion that can not be described. I hated how I felt toward her, the betrayal, distrust, disloyalty and lack of respect….marriage is not worth it! Good Luck❤️‍🩹 BTW:married 21 yrs/together 27, upon divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 03:40 AM
1

Sorry to hear you are experiencing this…you don’t deserve it but remember, the best way to win is not participate; she’ll keep pounding you with negativity because that is all she knows…she knows that cheating is wrong and it reflects her character, not yours! Focus on you and your children, be their great dad, don’t bash Mom in front of them and they will figure it all out in time…hope this helps, Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 04:56 PM
3

She will never give you the satisfaction of closure, or tell you why (she did what she did) as she doesn’t even know (herself)…you have to get your closure from you….if she cared, she would stay with you….sorry bout the truth❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 01:09 AM
2

Thank you for sharing this; I have been enduring the inner struggle for nearly 2yrs now and you have shed tremendous light onto a better perspective unlike any I’ve heard or read before. Good Luck to you❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 01:00 AM
2

The place I get my stuff… https://www.rcmadness.com/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI1LCrzun__gIVdiKzAB37jAOIEAAYASAAEgKB7vD_BwE
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 09:37 PM
2

Way to go! Enjoy! Keep it under $1,000…LOL👍
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 09:32 PM
2

Not sure who the question was for but mine did, sucks to know but helps with closure❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 09:30 PM
2

Yeah! Got into it through an ad on i-net for Traxxas , bought one under $200 when I found the RC park near me…opened me to a different world, friendly & interesting people…
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 09:26 PM
2

BTW: 52, married 21 years w/o hiccup, typical arguments but then in 2017 she began being different…menopause possibly but def a Narc! PEACE!
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 08:22 PM
2

Sorry you are hurting man…I am a year and nine months into single life (7mo Divorced)…my saving grace is my focus in my son, my business and myself (in that order)….best advice I got was gym, meditate and mutual clubs/organization meetings; met friends through a RC park, stuff like that! Gym is best for you, not for meeting folks but that may happen…keep faith, you will get stronger and life will improve❤️‍🩹Good Luck!
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 08:14 PM
1

Hey…that’s what she’d like! Don’t give her the satisfaction…pick yourself up, get to the gym, walk in nature, meditate like a Ninja and succeed for yourself…YOU CAN DO THIS!! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 05:24 PM
2

Then I suggest you file, get her to sign and move-on with life without her….focus on your health (self-care) and your son….if needed, mediate for help with filing (much cheaper than hiring an attorney) and then just have to wait…the Courts are backed-up! Good Luck brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 08:24 PM
2

Sorry to hear it man….More information is needed for decent advice; are you still in the house, did she move out (abandonment), is what you’ve paid accountable/proof ? Children typically are emancipated at 18 but it can be stretched until 23 in your state (?)… Bottom line, protect your interests, get legal advice (interview some attorneys but don’t hire/retain) and see if filing yourself or mediation is possible instead of court . Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 03:29 AM
1

No take-backs! Good Luck guys❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 02:59 PM
2

So sorry to hear, now begin living for yourself, your life! It is mind boggling how someone we dearly love flips and treats us so shitty! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 02:30 PM
2

Sending good energy bra, we are right there with you….we all took a huge hit and move-on; relationships take 2 to work or not work, you didn’t do this all on your own…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 03:29 AM
2

Sadly, at this point it’s cheaper to keep’er! Like the others advise, travel, do you and do fun stuff…morally, cheating is wrong but she’s not working with you so don’t rock the boat and don’t flaunt it in front of her…just live and see how life unravels..enjoy it as it flies by….some day, you may actually begin to enjoy each other’s companionship; after all, you have been together 36 years and through some hardships…Good Luck brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/23 10:24 PM
2

God bless…enjoy your life anew brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/23 03:06 AM
1

…all the advice you read prior to this is on the money👍 Sadly, she will reveal her true self to you…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/23 03:49 PM
11

They try to Hoover you because they think they can…like a child….if they don’t ask, they won’t get what they want…..and kids incessantly ask-as to break you down to say yes….hold your ground, don’t accept less than you deserve.
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/23 03:13 PM
13

I hope he remembers this when it happens (the hoover)…and it will happen!
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/23 03:05 PM
6

Right on the money! (Pun intended)
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/23 02:44 PM
2

..I hear ya! It’s like a different person, totally! I kept thinking she’ll change back, but nearly 2 years later now, she’s still parading with a lesser dude. We must move-on because we deserve a life WE make.. Regarding the emotions, the sadness…you need to take the time (when you can) and really “feel” it…by doing so it lessens the intensity in time…
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/23 02:37 PM
2

Sorry to hear this man…It’s still early in for you and I’ve been there…it’s painful! You must focus on your children and you…practice self-care and do your best….She doesn’t deserve you and you deserve someone who stays, not leaves and comes back. Life does get better (even though it doesn’t seem like it now) and you will find love again…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/23 01:59 PM
2

Congratulations on a quick Divorce file; still painful as hell but you have nothing binding you to her any longer so you can have a fresh start and never forget what you should not to tolerate; focus on yourself and do self-care:gym, meditation, nature walks, etc…friends help a lot… She’s still disrespecting you because she can but she doesn’t realize how much she devalues herself with each partner…stay strong, it does get better. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/23 11:38 PM
2

You can and will get through this difficult time; like most will recommend, self-care is a must:Gym, nature walks, church, meditation…you are already journaling and that helps…if serious about Divorce then do your best to get her to move out of the house (if you haven’t already), focus on YOUR game plan! Hope this helps, Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/23 11:58 AM
1

A dark time indeed, and frequently it feels nothing will change (for the better) then when we least expect it, some light is shined in by a kind soul we don’t even know. I feel ya! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 10:43 AM
5

Dating should be the last thing on your mind unless she already is (or cheated) and you are looking to do it in retaliation…either way, focus on yourself; self-care is a must! No contact with EX unless it’s for your kids or to discuss Divorce (and that is another beast). You need to heal YOU before you can let anyone else in and “move-on”. Hope this helps..Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/23 03:30 AM
1

Don’t move if not “needed”…stand your ground unless it’s you who “wants” to leave the relationship….period!
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 10:40 PM
2

Damn this is great! Way to go! Thanks for looking out for our fellow-man(men)! I wish I had this when I was going through it but some how, I did most of this and right-on…very helpful indeed…nothing but time and a strong mind heals us, but this is amazingly helpful info….Good Luck to all who are going through this hell❤️‍🩹 Doesn’t feel like it now but usually it’s a New Beginning after a painful Baptism!
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 01:11 AM
1

Sucks that you have to carry this cross alone right now but it will get better after the agony fades…you will be reborn to a stronger man with clarity! Exercise, go for walks, meditate (i thought it was weird at first but really helps), focus on you & what you want; let it be! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 12:08 PM
1

Happiness & blessing brother…❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 12:00 PM
2

Double screw-over….sorry to hear man! The Karma will be interesting….Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 11:38 AM
2

My Ex began to collect Polish Pottery; asked for mine & I said NO. It struck me as odd! I’m the Polish one, she is not….the Pottery I have is from my family (not hers) yet she felt entitled to it! I learned from my son that the guy she lives with now (divorce not official yet by the way) has some Polish heritage….appears my Ex of 27 years has a “type”! Not sure if it’s all people, but Women are a strange breed!
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 11:27 AM
2

Way to be! You do you & moving on…I am working toward that goal, thank you for the optimism that it is attainable…I really want to be indifferent to her but still feel sadness & anger for the mis-treatment; getting there though….Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 11:12 AM
1

Get Out! The quicker you move on, the quicker you can start over with someone else and get the family you deserve….remember, as a guy, our Biological clock continues; however, our attraction of fertile women deminishes👍 Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/23 02:09 AM
2

Hell no! Don’t get her a thing, not even a card….not even a text! Cut it off, move on, focus on yourself and healing, self-care & growth. She is soon to be your Ex for a reason. Good Luck!
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/23 03:59 AM
6

I actually helped my Ex move out (when separated), she took most of what she wanted then returned for more (as agreed) when we decided to divorce. She is so evil, I see that now! If I didn’t have my beautiful son, I wouldn’t understand what all the hell was for….life gets better, joy and understanding does arrive for you…have faith….focus on self-care/you, meditate, exercise and peace will be yours…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 05:03 AM
3

Sorry to hear of the heartache and ruined future hopes but remember you are better off without someone who abuses you and takes advantage of you…life will improve. Good Luck!❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 04:57 AM
1

Glad to hear it! You will recover quicker from your loss then and achieve the acceptance you need to move-on. Remember to never go back to abuse and manipulation, if that is what may be occurring, and you may not be aware if it…..talk with friends, family and perhaps a therapist….it def helps!
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/23 05:13 PM
1

Actions over words brother…You Got This!
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/23 04:33 PM
2

It will happen when you are ready for it to happen, when YOU choose to move-on! Sounds simple enough, but oh so difficult to choose…anger motivates you but after anger is gone, that is when YOU heal…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/23 01:55 PM
2

I can feel your pain and frustration brother; fucking hypergamy! Truth be told, she won’t get anyone better than you…you were and always will be her OG no matter how often she tries to replace you. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/23 01:51 PM
2

It’s heartbreaking yet exhilarating at the same time. You can be your own worse enemy so be kind to yourself…self-care is a must; go for walks with your dog, exercise, eat well and perhaps see a therapist or priest (rabbi) to discuss how you are feeling and coping…friends are great but may be biased. Don’t date til you’ve healed from your Ex. I found late nights and holidays most difficult so kept busy on holidays and worked-out in my basement late nights til exhaustion. If you are into it, it h…
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/23 12:44 PM
1

Sorry to hear, thanks for the share and wishing much more happiness & healing, Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/23 02:51 PM
1

Your divorce is based on current information (typically within the year)….if the judge never signs off, then your mediation agreement needs to be updated to reflect the most current data…keep that in mind! So if before the Divorce is signed off, by a judge, and you happen to gain assets during that time period, the Divorce can be contested to gain 1/2 of said assets (with some exceptions). Get the deal done before you move on👍 Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/23 01:16 PM
2

So sorry to hear this…stay strong man! You deserve better, never go back to abuse. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/23 01:03 PM
1

Very well put! When the trust & respect are gone, typically because of betrayal, there is nothing left except when kids are involved…way to stay strong & committed. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/23 12:59 PM
3

Get Legal advice, consult with the lawyers you don’t want her to hire, stay in the house and tell her you want a divorce…seek doing it through mediation if amicable—if not, hire the lawyer you liked best! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/23 03:30 AM
7

Glad to hear you stayed strong! Held to your word! —Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/23 03:26 AM
1

🤣…funny yet real!
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 12:50 PM
1

They say; “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans”… When has anything “gone to plan”, be real to yourself! You want to hook-up with this girl to spite your STBX… You shouldn’t want to be with a girl you keep on the DL unless you are in the mob..LOL
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 12:49 PM
2

Right on!
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 12:45 PM
2

Sorry to hear about your upcoming divorce! Fact:you are in separation! Much different than actual divorce! You must work on yourself (self-care, journal, hang with friends) if you want to heal after this relationship…. You know nothing about this woman in this short time, you can’t…yet you are willing to fly to Vegas to see her? If you are going to Vegas for yourself, to get out, have fun & perhaps get an escort if things don’t “workout” with her…great! Don’t make the trip “about“ her….hope this…
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 12:42 PM
1

Sorry to hear of your misery…it will get better! You will find people, not “the one”, who will encompass love and security for you but this time you call the shots…you go home when you want, you get to say no (and that’s okay), you don’t need to get approval to get what you want….it will happen for you…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/22 02:39 PM
3

I was married 22years, with her 27…loved her dearly & treated her just shy of a queen (I’m not rich); she gave me a son 12 years ago and became a different person 5 years ago…cheated, moved out and took 1/2 of everything….nothing I could do about it! If you aren’t ready, don’t marry …if you do, this is the absolute risk! Good luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/22 03:56 AM
3

You are in my prayers bra…hang in there! Better days will come!
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/22 03:13 AM
3

Merry Christmas fellow survivors of a crushed heart…we will prevail! Life continues and happiness, joy & an abundance of health and new trim will be ours👍 My first Christmas ever without my (12 yr old) son but I did spend Christmas Eve with him…hanging in there solo as I hope you all are…..it’s not easy, I know, but we have to be strong for our kids… If you don’t have children, do your best to focus on you and your health…Self-care is a must! A new year is coming, our lives aren’t recognizable b…
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/22 03:11 AM
1

Thank you for the acknowledgment!
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 04:29 AM
4

Not proud we’ve been or going through it but, def helps we are not alone and there is a future…focus on that👍
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 09:02 PM
2

Sorry to hear…that is very difficult to digest! Hope your ( and kid’s) life improves…she no longer needs to be enabled, she needs professional help…still…..don’t go back to abuse! Good Luck to you all❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 05:21 PM
4

Tough lesson learned! Never go back to abuse! You take them back and they lose what little respect (if any) they had for you and it gets even worse…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 03:56 PM
6

Good Luck❤️‍🩹 it’s a difficult journey but oh so worth it bra….
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 03:54 PM
3

Simple pleasures 😂🤣
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 03:53 PM
2

Glad you were proactive and improved your life; if you tried helping her and it fell on deaf ears, you did what you can…I’m not saying it wasn’t difficult or painful but I’m happy to hear you didn’t need to waste more of your life learning this horrible lesson…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 03:51 PM
6

Hang in there bra…it will get better! Not saying it isn’t painful, but it does improve…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 03:43 PM
6

Sorry for your loss but happy to hear you have peace…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 12:51 PM
7

That psychology is beyond my pay grade. I don’t claim to know or understand homosexuality but it is definitely part of humanity and I acknowledge that people should be able to pursue happiness and pleasure as long as it is not hurtful or detrimental to others…any (human) relationship is still just that, a relationship; requires trust, respect and honesty….hope this helps?
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 12:46 PM
18

I am in agreement buddy! Most (not all) women today want to be “happy” at any cost and don’t realize happiness is an emotion not a state so it’s temporary (as it should be) and that the difficult times are what makes relationships stronger as long as you both work together at it…. The current frequency of female selfishness is incredibly sickening, and the entitlement frustrating to see (and hear about). Many women believe it’s “their turn” to be selfish as men were at one time but last I heard,…
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 05:00 AM
1

It is done! Live a good, joyful and fulfilling life! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/22 12:32 PM
2

Sorry to hear you are going through this….STOP thinking of her (and how she feels) as she already has forgotten about you, and now your child…she has made her choice so now focus on you and your child. Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 03:30 PM
2

Que sera sera! Life goes on and you persevere ❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 12:08 AM
3

Sorry to hear bra…I feel the same, don’t know for fact, but feel the same…❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/22 08:22 PM
2

Sorry to hear that you are going through this hell; focus on you—self-care is a must, focus on your kids….hurts to say, but she is gone, she made her choice already! She’s someone else and you will see that someday, you WILL be happy again! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/22 03:54 PM
2

This is your journey my friend but we can give you advice…concentrate on you; self-care is a must (gym, nature walks, meditation), eat well, focus on your kids (if you have them), see a therapist if you can afford it or have health Ins that covers it.…consult with many attorneys near you…especially the sharks as she won’t be able to hire them as a result and hire 1 if needed…I was successful with mediation. Be kind to yourself, be patient as this will take time! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/22 04:43 AM
2

Sorry to hear you are going through this…you deserve better; someone who loves you and stays, not someone who comes back…you are worth more❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/22 02:52 AM
2

It does get better…not easier!❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/22 02:50 AM
3

Sorry to hear bra…if she has cheated, moved out or abused you in any way…it’s over and been over! If she’s confused, you love her, and you both go to counseling you may heal; only you would know this answer. If it is the former (not the latter)…let go, work on you with self-care, meditate, nature walks while you consult (not hire) attorneys in your area; consult with the sharks you do NOT want her to hire as your consultation makes it so that she can not hire that shark…👍 Mediation is a good way…
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/22 02:49 AM
3

Your explanation here is amazing! Thank you for the introspection...as painful as it (D) is, the fact it’s happening is enough to tell us we need growth and deserve better…the best! ❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/22 03:27 PM
2

Thanks for the great advice brother! ❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/22 06:04 AM
1

Definitely healing man…be patient and greatness will come-you got this! Never go back to abuse! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/22 06:03 AM
2

It sucks ass! However, to have your child(ten) at least for some time is much better than none…we do adjust & adapt; not necessarily easier just less brutal…Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/22 05:52 AM
2

Sorry to hear this bra..you are not alone and you will be alright!… First, do not leave the house, get legal advice from attorney consults, try 2-5 and consult with the most aggressive ones near you (then she can’t hire them)-when you decide who you want to hire, give them retainer then… In most states everything is marital assets so 1/2 and 1/2 is right, but if you can manage to do mediation instead there may be wiggle room if you are a good negotiator… Good luck man, this hurts like hell but s…
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/22 04:19 AM
2

So sorry to hear this…yes, not all women are like this but when you are enduring this abuse, what does that matter? Focus on your “self”, your kids and avoid her best you can (gray rock); you can do this! Good Luck❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/22 03:38 PM
2

You are doing it man..you’ll get through this! Great book for help …easy read! No Breakup can Break You:Nick Dawson-great advice in it for self help. Good Luck!❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/22 09:27 AM
4

sounds all too familiar to me bra….women are fucked up at certain points in life and worse when they can’t control us…Good Luck!❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 04:29 PM
1

Sorry bra…that is fucked up! GOOD LUCK to ya❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 04:27 PM
3

Sounds like you went through hell bra…God Bless!
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 04:15 PM
3

Great response..from the heart! Self-care is the best way to go and all else shall work out in time as long as you are okay with YOURSELF first! Good luck guys❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 04:14 PM
3

Don’t waste your time bra…once you divorced you don’t need to abide by her rules, nor her by yours… Exs and current partners need not meet unless you and they want to…feels odd but that’s the truth! Imagine she lived in Alaska & met someone, you really gonna go there to meet her boyfriend? Why? Trust she picks someone good for your kid(s) and your kid will know and tell you!…Live YOUR life! Good luck!❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/22 01:44 PM
4

Great advice…consult with many lawyers ($50-300) especially with the ones you wouldn’t want her to hire…don’t pay a retainer yet, take their advice first! Work on self-care (diet, exercise, nature walks, you-tube vids on grief, TedTalks on grief)…you’ll make it out okay, don’t go back to dis-respect and abuse bra❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/22 01:37 AM
4

Thanks for sharing…will help others who are on the fence…don’t go back, don’t rush anything new….unless you marry for money..LOL
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/22 01:17 AM
1

Great advice! Gotta be comfortable in your own skin as we are all we’ve got til the end…others help enhance that (life) but gotta love yourself first…you are worth it brother❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/22 01:15 AM
2

Hey, crutches are necessary tools in our life, when needed. She will remain your friend, now the deep healing comes from you to be able to concentrate on who and what it is YOU want…just hasn’t happened yet! Enjoy the journey friend! G-luck!❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/22 12:13 PM
2

They Are Control Freaks…bottom line!
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/22 11:53 PM
2

Great advice…thanks for that👍
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/22 04:11 PM
2

Run…don’t walk…away….🤣☮️
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/22 04:09 PM
4

…horrible (but true) how they don’t respect you, your agreement terms and your boundaries…typical Narcissism…stay 💪🏻!
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/22 01:26 PM
1

Sorry to hear you are experiencing similar tactics those man-eaters use! Know you are not alone my friend and that Karma does come for them…truth is revealed, your son will see the light as long as you allow him to, but not force him to…focus on you and him and you will both be great; happiness and positivity will be yours! Thanks for the share❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/22 01:19 PM
10

She’s already moved on…sorry for the news! Mine began dating when we were separated…21 years of marriage meant nothing to her…we are nearly divorced and she’s already moving in with her boyfriend….this part of relationships sucks but what can we do….MOVE-ON! Work on you, focus on your happiness and don’t look back…fuck’em!
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 05:03 PM
1

Sorry to hear of your tremendous burden all these years, why we take this on I will never understand but we do….God’s will? I don’t know! You need to “Stop” focusing on her and focus on YOU! What do you want? Go for walks (outdoors preferably), watch a few (not many) You Tube videos by Dr. Ramani who will educate you on Narcissism (confused often with BiPolar) and learn how you have been manipulated and are continuing to allow it…”You teach people how to treat you”. Legally you should consult wi…
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 11:24 AM
4

So sorry bro…she gaslighted you and future faked to manipulate….words and actions not matching! You chose the word subjugate…absolutely right! Stand your ground, stay in the house, get legal advice & concentrate on Self-care, healthy diet and your kiddos…you got this, don’t back down…for those kids; Good Luck…prayers for you all, even her!
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/22 01:23 AM
7

Congratulations on your new life…much luck and happiness abound❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/22 09:02 PM
3

Sorry to share in your misfortune guys…I too feel in a perpetual state of disbelief that someone we loved and trusted betrayed us so badly and added insult by financially and emotionally trying to bankrupt us…WTF! How much more must we endure? I need to believe that God (or whomever you pray to) will aid us in our healing and that someday (soon) we will feel lively again, have faith in humankind…It Does Get Better! ❤️‍🩹
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/22 05:10 PM
2

So sorry to hear this brother…great advice from the others…focus on your health, self-care and the children; all the rest will work out! Get legal advice ( without her knowing), interview with the “hard ass lawyers” (so she can’t hire them)…and stay in the house! Make her move not you if you can swing it! Good luck….my prayers are with you!
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/22 06:07 AM
6

Wish I heard this 21 years ago…LOL So great I can joke about it now, but truly hurt me…admire your honesty!!
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/22 08:26 PM
1

Never be subjugated into marriage, or any other arrangement for that matter, unless you “want” it. That is manipulation! BTW: You can and always will “do better” than an individual that does this to you…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/22 09:40 PM
4

Never be subjugated into marriage, or any other arrangement for that matter, unless you “want” it. That is manipulation! BTW: You can and always will “do better” than an individual that does this to you…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/22 09:40 PM
15

Do not leave..she is unhappy, she wants the change…she needs to leave the residence! Good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/22 11:50 AM
7

Very well written and I agree…thank you for the intense advice! Much respect for your grandfather 💪🏻
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/22 10:15 PM
1

So sorry to hear of your shitty yet familiar situation! Loving her is great but not enough to get back someone who doesn’t want to be gotten. She made her decision to move on when she cheated on you, do not deny that to yourself…now it’s time for you to get your life back and figure out what it is you want (she is not an option). Meditate, go for nature walks, exercise…self-care is prime! The hurt fades in time, not sure if it ever “goes away”, but it does fade and you WILL find love again. God …
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/22 01:36 PM
1

May be worth it in the end though…don’t want her hiring them…just sayin!
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/22 11:54 PM
4

Sorry to hear this…watch actions over words, trust your gut! Concentrate on self-care (exercise, meditation, playing with the kids)…she’s made her decision already…consult (not hire yet) a good lawyer for advice, do mediation! (Call any aggressive attorneys in your area she may hire, if you interview with them, she can’t hire them👍). Good luck…fight for joint custody & try to stay in the house for the kids sake…hope this helps!
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/22 02:52 AM
1

Sorry to hear it…keep strong! Work on your self-care (mediation, exercise, walks, nature) and you WILL get through this🙏
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/22 05:04 AM
5

Concentrate on you, do self-care; exercise, bike ride, out in nature…keep active! The “special” days are difficult but they do get easier…
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/22 07:06 PM
1

Not in your boat, sorry….but my uncle was about to divorce (her infidelity) and a year later she was diagnosed with terminal cancer so he held off…stayed with her 4 more years and 2years after her death, he died &62 y/o…! I believe it was the stress and lack of remorse on her behalf…may never know but shame he didn’t get to live out his life as he wanted.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/22 12:23 AM
7

She’s gotta want it…not you! Hard pill, I know!
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/22 12:12 AM
1

Absolutely a difficult choice ! Only you can determine the risk for yourself but I’d recommend just dating, loving each other and learn what constitutes common law marriage in your state.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/22 12:07 AM
1

This sucks total balls! You got your health so focus on keeping it—self-care! It will all work out in the end cuz your intentions are pure, hers aren’t and Karma is gonna give her a big shit sandwich so don’t be near her when that arrives….and it ALWAYS does! Praying for you man!
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 11:56 PM
3

Trust her actions not words…your gut knows so listen….work on Self-care and focus on what you want & need for YOUR future…in the end, you are all you got! She’s losing out on greatness!
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 11:51 PM
2

So sorry to hear this man…if you are separated already, you’ve got your answer! If you get back together the next time (and there WILL be a next time) it will be much more painful and messy…work on self-care and focus on your child….praying it goes in your favor!
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 11:47 PM
1

Read “This Breakup won’t Break you”; good info in there & quick read for ideas….self-care, keep your mind busy…praying for all the best for you!
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 11:40 PM
1

Sorry to hear this man…will pray things work in your favor…as difficult as it sounds, concentrate on self-care…she is far gone!
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 11:31 PM
7

I would check with JAG on the legal end, get her help is she wants…support her if you love her; if she’s not willing to get help with your help, you’ve got your answer…sorry to hear this, will pray for you all.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 11:28 PM
4

Sad to hear, I pray it improves for you!
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 07:51 PM
5

Together with her 27yrs, married 21…son (12) and she was never satisfied…always excuses! At this point, (legal) marriage is just a piece of paper…be with who you love.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/22 07:50 PM
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