TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

ExcuseMeNobody Archive

View 0 posts and 229 comments by ExcuseMeNobody on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
–

Then can they drop the accent and whiteness and americanness? A lot of people in those countries assume american = rich. Would their exact counterpart who's not american get the same desire? If not then it's a desire to get out of there more than anything
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:43 PM
–

Then I have a problem with cherry picking what you like about a society. Western freedoms and spending power come with a cost. You pay that cost or you go elsewhere and adopt everything they have. The reason why our economy is thriving is because women can vote and go out and work and exist in society the same way you do. If you can't stand your partner being entitled to the same rights and freedoms you're entitled to, then that's not partnership that's a power dynamic
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:40 PM
1

Sure but it is a fact that these men are desired primarily because of their passport and quality of life that they can provide abroad. It's not west vs east it's just gold digging with a plane ticket involved
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 08:11 PM
5

My problem with passport bros is going all women bad instead of reflecting. Personality matters. I would say the same thing about women saying all men bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 09:58 PM
4

I have abnormal period cramps. Was told by gyno that like unless there was an obvious cyst or issue in my organs, the only solution to basically everything is birth control 💀
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:40 PM
3

That's a yes though. It sounds like the question is establishing itself as pointing out a contradiction and expecting women to be like 'ykw ur right feminists are wrong '
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 05:52 PM
14

I think women end up jumping the gun from recognising patterns, which isn't always a good thing but a phenomenon that happens regardless. Eg a man asks 'aita for not wanting a woman w a high body count' a lot of times means 'i see women with high body counts as dirty ran through whores and I'll let them know that!!!!'. That's not always the case but it's happened enough times that women make assumptions
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 05:51 PM
8

I'd rather regret not having kids than having kids. Hope that helps!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 04:32 PM
1

Only if he also makes her feel wanted, respected and special and does his share of child care. If she's the one up with the baby every night then I hate to break it to you ..
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 04:32 PM
5

I mean yes it's ridiculous to expect more TV type romantic gestures. But expecting men to step up as fathers and do their share is not crazy
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 04:30 PM
–

You know the age of consent is 16 in most places already? It's also not really about legality because it's becoming increasingly frowned upon to have a sub-25 year old with 40+ year old. Morality and legality are not the same thing
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 02:09 PM
–

Nope it's well documented that even if the minor did the pursuing they can feel taken advantage of later in life. Teenagers do silly things and aren't always thinking things through- an adult accepting those advances though is messed up.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 03:25 AM
–

I think you're missing a lot of nuance to the question. To what extent is the consent thing conditioning of men to feel like landing an 'older woman' is an achievement by friends vs young women going for older guys from a place of trauma / being groomed. Also the consequences of women in this particular example are uneven - for example teen pregnancies often result from adult men, young women are prone to sexual coercion / physical abuse based on men's physical advantage. To what extent are our …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 02:35 AM
–

Language skills also have just been declining and some days I feel like half the internet doesn't even understand why it's an issue 💀 But ya avoiding the adjective like the plague is also mad
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 10:28 PM
–

Male and female are words in the dictionary. It's where you use them: female driver is fine, female nurse is fine, female body is fine. I callout people who use male as a noun out too. Context matters
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:51 PM
–

And assuming she's obese and to 'stop stuffing your face it's not hard'
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:42 PM
–

Because women come on here and are like 'is something wrong with me' or 'i know there are good men but im afraid of getting burned by poor choices so imma back off' and it's often self reflective. The feel good is because women relate. Why can't men give feel good for each other why do they come on here, call us females, and expect sympathy and women throwing themselves at them.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:42 PM
–

Yup. Calling them females tells me everything I need to know. Coming on here to generalize on all women is telling.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:39 PM
2

A man who wants to have sex with me says nothing about my desirability when I remember they would do that to a jar of mayo too..
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 07:00 PM
1

The post sounds like a man who won't hit me is entitled to a relationship with me? Hello?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 06:59 PM
2

Hey here is a wild idea, women can also tell gold diggers from a mile out but men refuse to notice. Everyone lacks discernment, when you learn the average American reads below 6th grade, nuance and discernment are the least of your worries. Calling a compliment a red flag and making blanket statements like that is brainrotted. It gained traction because influencers on social media need to say the next most shocking thing to generate engagement and stand out in a trend, and then some morons look …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 10:45 PM
1

So when women give someone a chance who is a red flag and get burned, we have posts that 'what did you expect'. Then when women have standards, we say 'what about all the nice guys that don't fit checklists'. Damned if you do damned if you don't. And yes, obviously people could use nuance. Here's a wild idea: nuance and standards are not mutually exclusive. How do you teach real discernment skills when relationships are modeled by trashy reality TV, celebrities who can't hold down a healthy rela…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 09:24 PM
1

Paramedics can use stretchers and multiple people to carry a person. Or robotics can replace them. What's your point
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 04:14 PM
1

So whats the alternative though? Assume everyone is hiding bones in their closet? Operate under the assumption any man can turn abusive and cheat? Give a chance to red flags because at least they're not hiding it?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 04:13 PM
-1

I mean no amount of charm will make me consider someone who cheated or has active red flags. I'll also not stay if some shows any signs of anything. But I'm also saying controlling abusive manipulative men can get away with their charm before their true face comes out.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 01:14 PM
–

Where did I say it was okay? I'm saying there is an aspect of deception. If a man was off-putting and made people around him get bad vibes right off the bad he wouldn't be a player to begin with
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 12:44 PM
–

Exactly. These takes are ridiculous because they fail to take into account that players are players BECAUSE they're charming. That's someone who can say and do the right thing, read the room, and put on a mask if they wish.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 08:13 PM
1

I do oppose that, plenty of people do. No I don't want to be hired just because a woman when I know I can compete fairly with everyone? Heck I'm all for full transparency in hiring practices and motives. In early education girls often outshine guys but by the end of high school they are taught to aim for less and expect less. I would say though in some places this isn't really an issue and I can't speak for every field. I'm sure even the difference between two states can be drastic
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 07:43 PM
3

People who know women know how women misrepresent what actually happens People misrepresent what happens to fit their narrative. That's just people for you. If they're not the same job description, distinguish in the title and explicitly write it into the description. Also in most civilized societies they used stretchers, and female police officers are also physically trained to handle psychos and violent drunks. They're not sitting there with pretty nails sipping boba Also then account for the …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:28 PM
3

You know the study where the male monkey was getting 4x as many bananas got mad when they started giving the female monkeys the same amount of bananas? Or men think there were as many women as men in a room when there were only 30% of women? And thought men were outnumbered when in fact it was a 50-50 split? An oppressor feels oppressed when their advantage is taken away from them. DEI initiatives don't have to be 'we need to hire a woman for this role no matter what'. It can be training in the …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:16 PM
1

But typically at that age nobody's bitter about it yet, teenagers blame popularity and lack thereof for the outcomes rather than generating into some hateful bitten personal vendetta against an entire gender. With the manosphere though and algorithms pushing this to kids as young as middle school is, it solidifies and amplifies these beliefs before they even have reason to form them. I saw someone interview some high schoolers at a right-wing protest and they genuinely had no idea why they were …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 03:58 PM
3

Women's pleasure is not as prioritized as men's in sex. So a lot of times their needs are just not met. Thus the situation is that men offer sex and ask for sex from women. Women are telling you hey that's not an exchange they're interested in, for example that sex only feels good if they're emotionally involved with the person. Rather than offering what they're interested in or standing your ground, you resort to deception. You're free to argue that women's expectations are unfair. You're free …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 09:09 AM
2

Uhh what about her needs? Her consent? This is leaning into we need to strip women's rights to make feel needed and wanted and desired again
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 09:05 AM
1

Well evidence suggests otherwise https://digitalcommons.bucknell.edu/honors_theses/20/ Half of Reddit won't shut up about the male loneliness epidemic and not being desired and not being wanted. But women get the short end of stick in hookups and when they do you want to tell them it's your problem. Damned if you do damned if you don't If sex is only complex for women, y'all have sex with each other
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:39 PM
1

That's just a double standard we need to call out. Anyone is free to end a relationship for any reason, staying and cheating is never right, unless either side was actively financially or physically abused into staying
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:35 PM
–

But that's because a larger portion of women is not interested in casual sex. Maybe we should normalize paying for it or something but what do you want a woman to do when you tell her you just have needs and want regular sex? To start undressing and get on her knees?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:33 PM
1

That guy is not the problem? I'm not saying a relationship MUST come out of it. It's WHY didn't a relationship come out of it. Losing interest or genuinely not feeling it it VALID, pretending to be interested in a long term relationship when you're not AT ALL and you're not even ready for a relationship is WRONG. The key is it's a problem when deception and manipulation is involved. A guy like you described is not describing or manipulating anyone
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:28 PM
24

I would argue that this truth is why women get super picky trying to find that 10% that dating standards become 'unrealistic'
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 04:14 PM
7

But that's what I said. In some situations a female bestfriend can mean one sided feelings from one side or unresolved feelings from another or whatever. But it could also mean a man respects women enough to maintain a woman platonically in his life. But what happens for example when a man cheat on his gf with his bestfriend? There will be people telling her 'men and women can't be friends and should have seen it coming'. I commented on the Klay Thompson situation, I've seen at least a dozen ree…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 04:11 PM
7

I think you're missing some nuance still in the Klay situation. A lot of men came out defending it that if they were in Klay's situation they'd also cheat because they got money and fame. Women's reaction on 'all men' is a reaction to opening the internet and seeing that repeatedly expressed. I also think you underestimate how common red flags are. If I wanted to date someone and statistically do all I can to avoid a 'bad man' then I'd avoid anyone who broke up a long term relationship less than…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 04:01 PM
2

Respectfully, if you think you've cracked the code, take your own advice and get a girlfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 03:47 PM
13

'men are rarely surprised that women are bad for them' You just solved your own question then. You're suggesting men operate under the premise that all women are bad, and your post is complaining that women are starting to operate under the same premise...
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 03:46 PM
18

What that tells me is men willingly go after gold diggers and then act like a victim of women taking advantage of them. Humans tend to think they're special and they'll be the exception to the rule - that's just how it is
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 03:32 PM
1

But these people do participate in The Sexual Marketplace though, they're just one foot in one foot out, but that still affects the Marketplace dynamics
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 12:48 PM
0

Yup let's pretend a man who's pursued by a supermodel will give a chance to the neighbor next-door
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 03:04 AM
1

Men in the past were a necessity when women couldn't own a house or get a bank account. It didn't matter what kind of partners they were really as long as they served a practical purpose / gender role. When that's out of the equation it turns out men don't bring much to the table
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 03:03 AM
1

You're reasoning fails if a woman is just trying to live her best life. That best life may or may not have a man in it. If a woman isn't interested in what men offer, she can opt out entirely. Men who date down end up resentful about it and tend to cheat the minute they have options
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 03:01 AM
2

Your evaluation fails to account for the 'no man' option. In current times where women don't rely or need men for practical reasons, the option to just be single becomes viable. So essentially men aren't just competing with each other in this market but also with women's peace in their single life. That alone raises women's value in this marketplace, because it seems that women are more likely to choose singlehood than men
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:55 AM
1

Women are picky because it's their way of trying to find someone who commits. An excellent man who has options and chooses you despite that is more likely to commit than a moron who settles for you until someone better looks his way. Does it work? Probably not that well. But the reasoning males sense
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:52 AM
0

Eh women get rejected and look in the mirror and take it out on themselves. Men get rejected and come on Reddit to cry about women only going for the top 1%. Big difference
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:50 AM
2

I think these subs are too hung up on observations that mean nothing in that case. In big societal issues like this, any observation holds in certain contexts. You can say women are too picky and then say women are not picky enough and that's why they end up with bad people. You can say women who sleep with you on first date are easy and then you can say women are withholding sex and don't respect you of they make you wait a few weeks. You can say literally anything and it's true to some extent.…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:48 AM
3

I mean it's hard to stay sane when you go on socials and every dude is defending Klay Thompson because 'every man cheats when given the opportunity'. People who can't take a step back and realize they're in an echo chamber of nonsense will have a hard time
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:45 AM
3

Men literally only see women they're interested in, everyone else is invisible. Same with red pill podcast bros - they hangout around Miami clubs where everyone is a shallow stupid gold digger that in no way represent the general population and proceed to make blanket statements based on what they see...
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:43 AM
11

I'm sure Klay, an athlete in basketball in American sports culture, was a pure virgin waiting for marriage in the meantime....
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:37 AM
10

It also shows that men vs women see high value vastly differently. OP makes it sound like Klay was the one doing charity and on the women's side it sounds like Megan was doing charity dating him. Tells me that the gap in expectations and perception of 'value' between genders is alarmingly large
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:36 AM
2

No but Ronaldo met Georgina when she was working a min wage job at a boutique /s
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 02:35 AM
1

I mean in the grand scheme of things deception exists and both men and women need better eq and interpersonal things to see situations for what they are, and a deceptive man in that context wouldn't have made a good partner either way so it's not like 'feeling used' requires reparative damages. It's a mistake people make and vent about to their friends and learn from. Again it might have repercussions on dating scenes because women who 'feel used' once are likely to be more careful and start liv…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:31 PM
2

It's unethical but sure not a crime and you can't sue her for it, but is it not reasonable to feel used in that situation? Like in your instance I'm not saying then you should force her or divorce her over it or whatever but feeling used is valid. Likewise, if someone deceives you I'm not saying you should sue them or they should go to jail for it but it's still unethical and they're allowed to feel 'used over it'.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:20 PM
2

Did you actually read any comments at all? Expectation of genuine consideration based on the words and actions of someone isn't entitlement. When a job calls you for an interview you expect that they give you an actual chance. It's deceptive if a potential employer interviews people for a role they already hired. Yes the expectation of genuine consideration based on words and a tip's YOU chose to say and perform isn't entitlement it's just social contract? Entitlement is if you meet someone for …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:15 PM
1

Deception and manipulation is unethical. That's like at the core of morality period. If you're using deception and manipulation to get that consent you're outside the scope of ethics, no matter what mental gymnastics you do to justify it. It's not illegal and by all means do it. But don't pretend it's like morally in the clear and don't mind people for judging you on such questionable choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:06 PM
2

When you're using deception to begin with you're already crossing a red line. If you know a woman wants to have sex with someone she's emotionally secure with and give her a false deceptive sense of security to get it out of her you are deceptive. If you want no strings attached sex then get it from someone who will have sex with you knowing that. By making the choice to deceive her about that emotional security you are manipulating or deceiving. Sex is a complex problem that's not a simple act,…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:00 PM
3

I'm not speaking about change your mind cases. For all I care the sex is bad and you lost interest, that's not the issue. The issue is going into it fully lying about intent. Scenario #1: INTENT: just wants to hookup DATING PROFILE: says seeking long term ON DATES: puts on mask and expresses interest in long term relationship She has sex with him on date #3 and he ghosts after or will only do booty calls at 2 am from then on. That's unethical. Scenario #2: INTENT: interested in considering a lon…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 06:49 PM
3

Sure miscommunication happens and assumptions are wrong. But if you meet off a dating app where you both indicate you're looking for long term relationships and discuss long term relationships and you have the ulterior motive of pursuing her just for sex and nothing more- the intent matters here- that's where the issue is. If she's hanging out with you and is considering having sex with you under the premise that both of you are considering something serious and in the back of your mind you know…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 06:26 PM
6

So if you buy a lottery ticket with a 0.0000001% chance of winning. But the company pockets everything and nobody wins anything, isn't that deception? Before you call it an absurd analogy, it's because that's how absurd you sound. Sure buying the lottery ticket doesn't guarantee you win, but you buy the possibility of winning. Like the basis on which this exchange happens is completely different depending on whether the true possibility of a relationship is on the table or not
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 04:32 PM
1

Changing your mind isn't the problem. I'm mainly arguing when you even present a long-term relationship as a possibility when you know fully that you're not anywhere near ready or serious. When you present the possibility that isn't even a possibility. That's deception. But of course you're free to end the relationship for any reason. That is not mutually exclusive with the fact thar lying about a possibility that isn't there to get someone to have sex with you is unethical
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 03:00 PM
5

And that's why I'm not arguing it's illegal? Theoretical morality and actually enforcing it aren't the same thing. I can argue that it IS possible to use a woman for sex by using INTENTIONAL manipulation and deception to do so and at the same time say it's hard to enforce or truly read into people's intention. But that doesn't invalidate the face that deception and manipulation to 'use a woman for sex' can occur
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:40 PM
5

Okay so let's say you're right. Then I'd like men to stop complaining that women withold sex 'too much' and men 'have needs'. It's very much damned if you do damned if you don't. But when women actually become picky to take responsibility and avoid feeling like 'they've been used' y'all get mad at that too
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:38 PM
20

Why do you assume the woman wanted sex and not 'sex with someone she shares an emotional bond with'. If he deceptively leads her on with the latter and she's under the impression she was getting the latter it's unethical if his intention is the former. If it was moral, why did he need to resort to deception to being with
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:16 PM
6

The reason why we have regulation on consent and rape and whatnot is because it's incredibly intimate and vulnerable. Someone puts themselves in a physically and emotionally vulnerable position to have sex with you on the basis that you have a certain emotional rapport is different than someone going into it emotionally no strings attached. Entirely different emotional states with entirely different risks in aftermath
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:14 PM
12

I'm not arguing it should be illegal. But it's deceptive nonetheless. Legal consent and ethical consent aren't the same thing. If you want a one-night stand just say that instead of being a manipulative loser
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:12 PM
20

The common understanding of being used though is when someone, under the guise of platonic or romantic relationship, doesn't truly see you that way but uses that relationship to get something out of you. You can argue that 'using someone' for sex isn't immoral but you can't argue it's not 'being used'. That term itself denotes exactly that feeling so you're arguing the definition altogether
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:05 PM
36

So people can never feel used by their friends? If your friend only calls you to borrow money and you lend it to them and later you feel like you've never been valued by the said friend beyond an interest-free lender, then that's not being used?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:01 PM
22

If a man lies and promises or communicated commitment just to get sex with no intention of following through then he has consent problems
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:00 PM
–

look, I've been in online spaces where all you say is true. And I'm sure in-person spaces exist like that. But by your argument, there are also countries and rural areas where men still control all decision making and women need to serve their husbands. The world is not even of equal everywhere, and just like you, I wish it were. However, in my circles of employed and educated people, and I acknowledge that's not the norm everywhere and whatnot, it's pretty much even, people are too busy living …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 11:06 AM
–

I acknowledge extremes in all cases, but most people don't mind if you avoid someone with a body count if you hold yourself to the same standard. The hypocrisy is the issue. If my friend was broke and said 'no broke men' I'd call her out on it. As long as a standard is not hypocritical it's fair. Also I think it's basic decency to just stay away from people you don't like instead of lecturing / bring them down, from both sides.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 10:32 AM
-1

I know I'll get downvoted for this but by design anyone's dating pool should be and is generally narrow. Hookup pool might be larger for women because men show more interest there. But hookups don't require you to genuinely enjoy being around someone, align on lifestyle, have ideas in common and so on. But to find someone who you truly get along with that you choose to be romantically exclusive with you and they feel the same about you and choose you back is essentially a miracle. Even close fri…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 10:06 PM
–

Those power dynamics are detrimental to whoever is at disadvantage. Dealing with rich in laws if you grew up lower middle class is a nightmare regardless of whether you're a man or a women. Most people have little in common with someone who grew up in private school flying private or business and vacationed in ski resorts every weekend in winter. This goes for gaps in looks, wealth, age or anything and for both sides.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 10:17 AM
1

And where did I say relationships with power imbalances don't last? But there's still power imbalances and the relationships are still shallow - the woman will overlook a lot of things not because they love their partner but because he's rich. And that's shallow. Say what you want but I'd hate myself if I was the man in that situation
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 01:31 PM
5

Well said. Large gaps imo will always create unbalanced power dynamics and will almost always be shallow.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 05:09 AM
5

But in that case they should complain that 'the women they want don't give them a chance' not 'women don't give them a chance'. That distinction matters
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 09:39 PM
2

But I'm just asking that people acknowledge that. A lot of my friends will admit that 'the men that they want don't want them back' not 'no man wants them' whereas men tend to make blanket statements about no woman giving them a chance while treating women they're not attracted to as literally invisible
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 09:38 PM
1

Depends on the environment. I'm in academia and women don't take their husbands last name because their papers and degrees are under their own name
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 01:06 AM
1

Not all men. Not all women. A minority in both cases. You're taking a minority of each and generalizing to everyone. There ARE women who'll sit there and tell you they want someone hot above all else. But there also women who do want kind loving respectful partners
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 12:59 PM
1

What about the serial killer woman in South Korea who built a whole fanbase and people calling for her release j cus she's hot. Deranged people exist and by all means if you want to be with a woman who will overlook insanity and is unable to make rational decisions with her life, then have at it. But it's not normal behavior
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 03:31 PM
1

That's just immaturity. Even the hottest man will start looking ugly to me if he's evil. Looks are not nearly enough to make some douchebag tolerable to be around. Many women would agree. I don't get your point at all. Attraction is not just physical, it's also character. Someone is properly attractive if their character is charming AND they look good. THE INTERSECTION OF LOOKS AND CHARACTER NOT THEIR UNION. Looking good is not enough. It's scary how you seem to limit attraction solely to physic…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 07:29 AM
2

So you're saying you're attracted exclusively to evil as a trait. Ya that requires therapy You control who you get with by getting with someone YOU'RE ATTRACTED TO WHO'S NOT EVIL. Take the Venn diagram of people you're attracted to and good people and date within their intersection. What I'm saying is if there is no intersection then yes get therapy
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 04:29 AM
8

So what if it's biology. Do you pee and poop your pants because it's biology and why should you wait to find a bathroom?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 05:21 PM
2

Oh I don't care who you're attracted to. You can't control who you're attracted to but can control who they get with 😭😭 Idk what we've been fighting about so far helppp have a good day!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 02:14 PM
3

So you're saying you're attracted exclusively to bad people? In that case you need therapy People usually are 'attracted' to a type. As in a set of traits typically. All you need to do if find someone you're attracted to who's also a decent person. I don't see how that's the problem? You meet A. You're attracted to A. A is a douchebag. You move on. You meet B. You're attracted to B. B is alright. You ask our B.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 02:00 PM
3

What exactly are you attracted to in this case? The 'bad' traits or other traits that often are found in people with 'bad' traits? Like if you're attracted to confidence and while many douchebags happen to be confident, there are also many confident people who aren't douchebags? Just go for the latter?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 01:47 PM
1

I think that's normal tbh in that you learn about people from who they spend time with and let into their life. Includes exes, friends, etc
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 01:38 PM
1

I think they're only invalid if hypocritical. If you have a body count' in triple digits and insist your partner has sub 3 go kick rocks
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 01:37 PM
2

No. Be with a person you're attracted to who's a good person. Attraction at the expense of 'good' and respectful is dumb You being attracted to someone isn't the same as choosing to be with them. You can be attracted AND not be with them
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 01:33 PM
1

I think to some extent if you aren't meeting good men and women then you're either looking at the wrong place or the good men and women don't think you're good
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 01:11 PM
3

Ignorant as in unaware that the man is that way or ignorant as in just never thought of it? If it's the latter I'm still keeping distance until they change for the better
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 01:10 PM
2

If you know your man is a racist sexist violent rape apologist unempathetic moron, emphasis on 'you know', then overlooking that makes you complicit and I do not want to associate with such people. People can make mistakes and grow and change but until then they're not entitled to grace imo. Sure morality is not always objective but in many cases it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 12:55 PM
1

We are an intelligent species not bees who mistake shiny objects for mates. Attractive is amoral but choosing to be w a bad person because you're attracted to them makes you a bad person
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 12:53 PM
1

It doesn't mean get hung up on the same woman forever. But like the other user compared to job search: customize your application. You're supposed to read up on the company and the position and adjust your application material. Show interest in a woman around you. Don't assume she's the same as the last. Listen and see her and not some stats from your limited data. You're asking 'an individual' out and not 'a random person from the opposite gender'
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 11:17 AM
4

It's natural doesn't mean we should all stoop that low. I will judge a gold digger and I will judge the guy that goes for the 20 year old equally.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 11:13 AM
–

No normal person spends their free time typing up essays to fuel gender wars. It's a loud minority, from all sides
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 10:09 PM
-2

Or I have a crazy idea!!!! Women and men are both individuals, when you're interested in someone, you read the room and proceed accordingly. Love and dating isn't a stats game where you shoot your shot exactly the same way w a 100 women as hope for the best! I know we love our gender wars on Reddit but if you're going for shallow ppl, men or women, and get burned it's on you. People are individuals
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 12:49 PM
22

Many are into older men (not for money) as a result of trauma and such. It's super rare for a young adult to truly want to be w someone 15-35 years older unless they have issues of some sort
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 12:44 PM
2

So you can't generalize a gender. But the men who don't care about other men are likely to not care about societal issues period
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 11:47 PM
1

Well said. Also everything exists in a context. A standard may be reasonable today but not 10 years in the past or 10 years in the future. Likewise, certain statements are offensive in the current context or are not offensive in the current context but could be in the future
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 01:16 AM
1

But can we at least acknowledge that women thus have leverage because they're willing to opt out of dating rather than lower their standards? Look idk what's out there. My environment is almost exclusively people who are too confident and who are good at finding people they click with. Heck my program is 80% dudes and anyone who wants to date does date (girls from our program, outside our program, girls they know through other ppl etc). My library and gym are full of couples including mid lookin…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 08:38 PM
1

My environment doesn't have gender wars really, but I'm in uni so everyone's social circle is huge and nobody really struggles to date if they want to. Regardless, if you want to break down patriarchal structures that harm you do something about it for god's sake
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 08:13 PM
2

Ya but someone has to make the first move. How will it change if you guys comply? Also are those 70% people you want to be with? They have that preference now they'll have it forever. That's your no 1 sign you're not aligned. There is lit no reason why a woman who's making similar income to you should expect you to pay. Offering to pay is a courteous gesture that shouldn't be gender based and if you don't feel like it paying for your stuff is fine
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 08:07 PM
2

That's an immature reaction regardless of who does it. Probably because couples online do it for satire and normies see it and think that's how the world works
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:58 PM
3

Okay not troll accounts. The equivalent of men swiping just for one night stands. But just like women can refuse to sleep w men on day 1 men can refuse to pay for a woman's dinner. This is so easy to solve 😭
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:56 PM
6

I'm a woman but I stand by the fact that men should just refuse to pay on a date. A woman who's so shallow that she turns you down because she can't pay her own food is a red flag you don't want to be with.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:53 PM
2

That's icky but I'm counting those as troll accounts because it takes audacity to download an app and go out w ppl for free food. Isn't that more reason to refuse to pay on dates tho?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:52 PM
–

I don't personally think men should be expected to pay, but that aside, shouldn't women be flocking and giving chances to everyone to get a 'free meal' out of them? Yet they don't. Most women spend a good amount of time and money getting ready for a date, a free meal isn't worth all that trouble to sit with someone you don't enjoy being with. 5 dates in a row don't turn out well and that's their social battery depleted for the quarter. There's literally no winning w it
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:43 PM
–

That movement happened because women imposed it by allowing themselves to exist as themselves and opting out of dating when men did not like that. Eg 4B movement. Eg not tolerating sexist and misogynistic talk. I'm not saying there are no unrealistic standards for men, but women didn't go against standards by saying 'if you see a hot chick and an average chic pick the average' it was more the average refusing the disrespect (and yes there are women w low self esteem and low self respect, but the…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:24 PM
–

Okay so let's say you swipe on a hundred girls. 10 swipe back on you. A 9, 2 8s, 5 6s, a 5 and and 1 4. What happens from there on? You go out with all of them? You ghost 9 and pursue the 9 until she rejects you and love on to the next like you're a max heap algorithm? Or even suppose 3 8s swipe on you and 1 of them is more your type... Now put yourself in a woman user's shoes. What is she supposed to do with a 100 profiles where 50 don't care about dating and just want to hook up, 30 will put h…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 06:59 PM
–

Yes girl that's my point 😭
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 06:16 PM
–

You can see it from how men describe dating. 'getting girls'. The general unspoken philosophy is you shoot your shot with your league and way above your league and pick the hottest one who'll give you a chance.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 06:16 PM
–

I love how men on here act like every swipe women get is a declaration of commitment from someone who can maintain a healthy relationship 'even if they're not that attractive or rich or are a bit socially awkward'. We need a social experiment or smt from some woman filtering every profile and quantifying exactly how many men will want to hook up right away, how many will be absolutely insufferable on first dates, how many will unmatch, ghost, and so on. The data won't be pretty
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 06:14 PM
–

Why is it a serious issue. Should the gov launch propaganda programs to manipulate women into dating mediocre men or what? Women are increasingly choosing to skip dating and sex altogether. Which probably doesn't help yall
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 05:33 PM
–

You're free to want those 5% if you will be fine if you don't get them. Nobody stopping you from thinking you deserve Margot Robbie, but just be fine with not getting her
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 05:31 PM
–

You realize the numbers strategy on the apps is swipe on everyone and date the hottest that gives you a chance right? Women are less likely to do that
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 05:30 PM
–

No ur wronggggggg women want the same 1% of men and will even share a man if he's hot enough but men dw share (this is an actual reply I got last week unironically) /s
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 05:28 PM
–

Dating isn't a right tho. Economic opportunity, existing in society is one thing. You aren't owed a relationship
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 05:26 PM
–

But why should men's profile liking rate be the norm? Why can't you tell men to only like 5% of profiles too instead
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 05:23 PM
2

In most of these cases to be fair it's discussed before hand. Not sex specific, some will hook up while taking it slow, just the talking stage labels part. In my circle people are busy so dates are maybe 3-4 times a month and 3-4 months is normal before putting labels. From what I've seen it's not just from one side, but that period gives people time to really think about what it'd be like to have this person as a constant in your life as opposed to someone you're just getting to know.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 09:59 AM
2

Taking things slow is often really just 'i wanna figure out if this is real connection or if I'm just bored and curious'. Some of my friends will be down bad but still stick to the discipline of waiting it out. Many are just not interested in 6 month relationships kinda
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 08:47 AM
1

Female participation in the workforce improves the economy and that's for both men and women. Women working also means more earning potential per household and thus an improvement in life quality Feminism isn't meant to elevate or lower men. It's meant to equalize women where they are at a disadvantage. It doesn't run counter to equality, it focuses on aspects where inequality affects women. Why are you expecting women to lead the change on issues men's rights issues. I'll support such movements…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:56 PM
–

Sorry I shoulda worded it better, it's more for these people around here who cry that the only women who talk to them are overweight unattractive women and they're stuck w that as the only option. It's common for people who settle (who r not the majority to begin with) I genuinely believe most people love their partner there is no reason to choose a lifetime of misery over someone who's just chill it's not that deep
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:14 PM
–

Except what happens more often is a woman who can't find a man she likes sticks to her friends and her cats. Most men seem to be unhappy with that option
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:11 PM
–

In cases of significant improvement of status where men from the get go of their relationship felt they 'settled'. Obv not people who really love and choose to be with their partners
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:10 PM
1

Nobody sits back when their retirement age is increased. Feminist groups likely wouldn't have 'gotten involved' at all if the equalization was lowering mens retirement instead. In any country in the world, for any demographic, you try increasing retirement age people will be unhappy. Regardless of the reason. Feminism primarily finds inequalities against women and try to fix them. Not to say men don't face inequality, but it's outside the scope of feminism but also feminists won't impose y'all f…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:09 PM
1

I mean OP doesn't seem to claim men shouldn't watch porn or anime or even have fantasies, just don't expect them in reality. Ya you're right some of the wording is poorly done on the last paragraph but I went off mostly on the last sentence.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:01 PM
–

Dead bedrooms and feeling unappreciated are grounds for divorce not cheating. But in this instance there is a specific subset of cheating from men who later on get access to women they couldn't before (due to improvement in looks or wealth or manipulation or whatnot). The idea is essentially it seems like women are more likely to choose nobody over a bad fit (hence picky) whereas men are more likely to settle for the closest thing to their type that they can get, but many men later try to upgrad…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:50 PM
1

and not even what's between your legs has value
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:35 PM
–

yall are not lonely enough you see
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:35 PM
–

and why are you entitled to women giving you sex freely again?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:34 PM
–

Men take the best they can. A 7+ is out of their league? They'll settle for a 6 if they have to. They may not even perfectly like a woman, but they need the outcome to be someone, the best they can get. Women are selective because if they decide they want an 8+, they'll wait for an 8+ or stay single if that doesn't happen. So women are okay with staying single if nobody meets their standards. No I'm not ugly and I don't deal with people who treat dating prospects like wild animal mating. I'm sur…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:33 PM
–

Ya but the pool of people on apps is skewed already. Beyond the gender ratio, well socialized people who can get into relationships without fishing for validation on apps do so. So the quality of the pool on apps is already below average in some ways (a person on dating apps is more likely to want the attention than the person not in dating apps). Now add a gender ratio aspect to it, and add desperate men who swipe on every woman because they just want to get laid. So then you come in maybe inte…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:59 PM
–

A common justification for affairs from men is 'i used to be a loser no woman wanted me so I ended up with my ugly wife!!!!! But I had a glowup/made money/hit the gym/met a 20 year old and suddenly I have options!!!!'
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:51 PM
–

But the situation on the apps is not representative of real life dynamics. Having someone to hookup with isn't the same thing as being seen and heard. Horny men will also use mayonaise jars. Should we say a mayonaise jar is more desired than a man or what now.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:36 PM
–

Adapting Military Equipment to Account for Gender Differences – NAOC https://share.google/ykOcosYRpSYnWk8B2 Are female soldiers satisfied with the fit and function of body armour? - ScienceDirect https://share.google/mxN5o1sefhmcJCc2S Source: UK Parliament https://share.google/wQLDtMXSbcmBupKhk For decades, Canada's military had no combat uniforms designed for women. That's about to change | CBC News https://share.google/NCbx0O0D5H2mp5kyR
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:32 PM
–

So the problem with this analogy is equating dating to sex. Sex is part of dating but there is much more to it. So ya the key lock analogy is misplaced.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:00 PM
–

No seriously. Men take the best they can get and women wait till they get what they want. But no women are pickyyyyy
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 04:58 PM
–

Apps are not real life. Does the world have a 3:1 gender ratio?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 04:56 PM
1

Isn't the argument precisely that porn and anime are essentially fiction that shouldn't be made a dating standard that you find women to fulfill? Women read dark romance but don't expect a man irl to do that whereas some men actively seek what they fantasize about from porn
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 03:12 PM
5

You need to be practical. Expecting someone to be able to contribute financially isn't a crime. Most people can't buy a house on their own so it's reasonable to want someone who can contribute and make that possible together. Why should men's preferences dictate what is moral or reasonable with standards. You being okay with a woman working at McDonald's doesn't make it wrong for the men and women who prioritize different things. People are selfish by nature. That's not a gender thing. By your l…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 03:01 PM
1

Men are called out for contributing to the bystander effect, for laughing along with jokes and not calling them out.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 02:18 PM
2

Influencer tradwives are some of the worst people on this planet you can't change my mind. We're talking about women with crazy income, with financial freedom, creative freedom who get on social media and cosplay little obedient subservient wives on camera. These are the ult 'bossbabes' misleading other women
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 02:16 PM
1

Not aware of Mexico specifically but yes I'm all for equal reduction
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 01:50 PM
1

Nobody says a man shouldn't care if a woman works at McDonald's. That's a patriarchal structure men enforce on their own. If there is a part of a patriarchal system you have an issue against, do your part in dismantling it. Walk away if your partner works at McDonald's if you want. The standards to choosing a partner are personal choices, what does that have to do with basic human rights? By your own logic the patriarchy harms men too. Being told that your job is being a provider and losing sens…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 01:45 PM
–

Theres the angle of being more deserving of raises cus they need to 'provide for a family'. Plenty of jobs women do better, including as surgeons for example. Also there is documented studies about how much more unlikely it is for exec boards to hire a woman once a woman is already in because gender discrimination becomes more pronounced in the hiring committee. Also documented studies about companies bringing in women as CEO's when they're on the brink of failing to set them up to fail
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 01:28 PM
3

I think there is an unbalanced dynamic because women seem to take 'nobody' as a serious option if their standards aren't met more often whereas men go for 'the best they could get'. Basic math means one side gets to be pickier (esp on dating apps where the ratio is upwards of 3:1), but some men seem to be calling for forcing women to date or rolling back on their rights which is wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 10:48 AM
1

Eh tbh not really. These standards kind of evolved from my surroundings. Like virtually everyone I know and interact with fits all those criteria from all genders. I get it's not realistic to arbitrarily try to do that anywhere anytime, but I strive to embody those traits every day so it's easier to meet people on the same wavelength. By design, women who want true partnership will also be more mature and less reliant on dumb social media trends to form their ideals and opinions, but they would …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 10:45 AM
-2

Retirement legislation changes will be undermined regardless of gender because you're telling people who are 10 years away from retirement they are now 15. Or 3 years from retirement they are now 8. Forget 5 year increases, France tried increasing it by 2 years and the country was in absolute chaos from riots for a while. Regardless, I personally support the increase and plenty of feminists do. I know some sexual assault laws make it hard to go after female offenders, I support reform on that if…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 10:14 AM
-1

It is about equality tho. Also get your records straight, feminist groups opposed the improper implementation of that legislation. At no point in history was retirement age increased without people complaining - that's not a gender issue that's a people issue because people 5 years away from retirement get suddenly told they're 10 years away from retirement (eg remember the French riots not long ago). Not informed about custody, but isn't 50/50 the default? Most people around me w separated pare…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 10:04 AM
-1

If you have such an issue with women's unfair expectations with dating, y'all should start your own version of 4B and withdraw yourself from the market. Either women will lower the bar or the red flags will filter themselves out. Women have done it in SK and it worked
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:53 AM
1

Basically, you're reasoning for why feminism doesn't make sense is because women expect equality and still have expectations for men who want to date them. Except dating isn't a systemic issue? If you think the expectations are unfair, don't date them or find someone who aligns with your values?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:51 AM
–

Military systems and equipment are not really designed for women, so we'd need to start by reforming that first and foremost
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:45 AM
–

How about how research was primarily made for men? Freaking pads weren't even tested with real blood until recently. Endometriosis affects a significant portion of women but receives virtually no funding compared to male baldness, and when it did, there were two instances one where they looking into the impact of endometriosis on attractiveness of women and another where they looked into the impact of endometriosis on the partners of those who have it. In general, there is dangerous underreprese…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:43 AM
-5

Received help but still had to get up and do it themselves. Feminists can support that movement but it's not up to them to start it
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:37 AM
-5

Nah, feminism is about fixing the unfairness on women not unfairness on every group. Men should mobilize their own movements and as a feminist I will support it but it's not our job to do that work for you
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:36 AM
–

I'm a feminist and I'm all for equalizing that age
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:34 AM
–

Many traditionally women's jobs became better-paying when men started to dominate it. So feminism would actually be needed because different practices are valued differently based on the gender dominating them. that's a problem in and of itself
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:32 AM
1

Did you miss the part where I say I hold myself to the same standard? Those are basic expectations all my friends meet, men and women, why is it unreasonable to expect a romantic partner to do so exactly?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:38 AM
1

I will say though that the truer people are to these ideas of 'modernity' the higher standards they hold for education, intellect, and personality. Which I can't say most men or women in general live up to. Precisely because I don't need a man for practical reasons like funding dates and gifts for me, I am probably really intolerant of manosphere type talk, poor social skills, inability to hold deep conversation, unhealthy attachment styles, insecurity and toxicity. Granted, I hold myself to the…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:26 AM
5

nah im a woman and i agree with all of thise. i don't need flowers and dont want anyone to buy me anything, and i can pay for my own food. it's not that controversial
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 04:55 AM
1

Exactly this is literally peak 'performative male' profile
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 08:13 PM
2

I'm progressive and most of my friends are and don't care about height and happy to spend my own money and even pay for dates...
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 08:12 PM
1

A significantly overweight woman as a result of poor lifestyle choices (rather than health issues) who isn't actively working on getting healthier doesn't fit those traits for me personally (if I woke up as a man)
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 08:10 PM
0

Then that's a result of failed societal planning and education. Rather than blaming women for not being drawn to dull poorly conditioned men, we should ask how to fix the problems that lead to these personalities. Women in the past few decades focused a lot on creating spaces for young women to build and develop themselves, eg leadership programs, self development programs, career programs to break into male dominated fields. Although many men supported those efforts they were primarily advocate…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 08:08 PM
0

Not never, but it should be balanced. Women are also the most confident around men they're not into, that's a human thing. But ideally, in a dating context, a potential partner is expected to be well rounded. That 'persona' you speak of doesn't just come from talking to women, but from talking to people in general. How do you socialize when you're in a new room. How do you network with professionals at a conference. How you behave when introduced to new mutuals, etc. Obviously those skills need …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 05:55 PM
-4

So having decent posture, making eye contact, shaking hands firmly ish, voicing your thoughts clearly ish is mutually exclusive with being vulnerable? First date talk is something like getting to know basic questions, preferences, common topics, etc. If there is a sensitive emotional topic you can allude to it without trauma dumping your childhood. When you're closer, and how your day was comes up you can be open about the random coworker said something that left you feeling down. On a Saturday …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 12:43 PM
1

I don't think they should be treated different. I don't expect my partner to be my therapist. I also don't think anyone should bluntly refuse to listen and tell you to go see a therapist. I hold my self to the same standard I hold other people to, friends or romantic partners: everyone should be reasonably self-sufficient in emotionally regulating themselves because I'm not their therapist. I'll be there to listen, bounce thoughts off of, be a shoulder to cry on or lean on, help someone seek sup…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 12:35 PM
1

Women have another issue of shaming each other for wanting to attract a man and 'centering a man', they're typically not as passive as you think about it (also keep in mind many men express they'd be icked out by a woman who makes the first move, Carlos Sainz from F1 also pushes that narrative for example) What do you think confidence is? I expect it from both genders. It's just basic eye contact, hand shake etiquette, decent pace and volume pretty much.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 12:30 PM
2

Yes as a woman I agree so what
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 11:54 AM
0

One occurrence of the woman breaking down is one thing, if she did every night or even regularly a couple of times a week it's fully reason to sit down and have a conversation about seeking help, type of content she consumes that leads to that, friends, etc. Feeling down and expressing it is fine, treating your partner as a full time therapist is not. Dismissiveness is a red flag and obv the conversation should happen sensitively with gentler wording and at an appropriate time not in the heat of…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 11:53 AM
2

There is balance to 1 though, it's a lot to expect a woman to be your emotional container and regulator, that's why you need friends to take some of that load. Women typically have a larger support system and don't need their man to help them process everything. There's also context - showing emotional openness isn't the same as trauma dumping and drowning in self-pity in a first date.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 10:48 AM
3

Idk how to break this to you but women also go through phases where they do things that attract men, and then mature and decanter men from their lives. Why can't men do that too? If you're basically playing pick me, learn to undo that the same way women do Confidence in approach isn't mutually exclusive with emotionally open. Your first date isn't a therapy session learn to read the room. Confidence is also just basic social skills not a ted talk. Men also describe their type often as women comf…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 10:45 AM
0

Why are we assuming it's homophobic. Go to any random gen z insta post and every comment from their girl friends sound gay as hell. In many cases it's not an insult, and if it is it's because the man receiving the comment is insulted because they deem gay men lesser. There is lit a whole social media trend about 'women attracted to men is proof that sexuality is not a choice' - if anything women see being straight as the unfortunate insult lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 09:48 AM
1

Eh not really, some of these are also the same women who wish they were bi or lesbian cus they'd rather date their friends. There are genuinely women who see it as an option they wish they had
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 01:32 AM
-4

Not really. The date each other is for men who praise men as flawless and perfect while women are the root of all evil. If someone genuinely thinks women are inferior and inherently problematic why bother dating them...
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 12:22 AM
–

Most people don't apply for positions of power period tho men or women? And the gap is closing up? There was a study done on how much less likely it is to hire a woman into an executive role once another executive role is already filled by a woman (selection committee becomes even more biased). How do you respond to that ..
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 07:32 PM
5

You do actually marriage vows
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 11:09 AM
–

I would even go farther that some women perpetuate the patriarchy. Plenty of female PMs were openly misogynistic and did nothing to improve the condition of women during their time in office. I heard or read somewhere that in a way these women have to overcompensate for being born with the wrong gender
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 11:00 AM
–

Honestly I'm happy for them, if that makes people's life better. But also women are a few miles ahead they've already built entire relationships with chatbots they're now emotionally attached to
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 09:20 PM
–

What about men who really care about stealing the spark from a woman's eyes? Like men who want 'submissive women' but like they want to break an independent bossbabe to submit to them? It would be too easy with a robot how long before they need novelty again...
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 08:54 PM
–

I don't think people care about realistic considering porn is fake as hell and many still love it. Also mayo jars...
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 08:53 PM
1

So the laundry doesn't get magically done every week. The dishes don't pick themselves up and self clean and dry every day. The bathroom needs to be cleaned. Sheets need to be changed twice a month. If you're unsure what to do, you have a talk once with your partner about who does what and how often, and do it. Your partner isn't your personal babysitter who will make a daily checklist for you with 10 reminders
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 03:08 PM
1

So basically a man will settle for you until he finds a hotter woman who looks his way... so why exactly should women not try to find a hotter man anyway (in a way it's safer too because a hot guy who chooses her when he has options will probably be less likely to cheat than a guy who chooses her for lack of better options until better options are available...) eta - cheaters suck regardless of gender. I'm inclined to dismiss studies and trends involving affairs because the thought and decision-…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 05:35 PM
2

But that's totally something men can control bruh. I don't know just be pleasant to be around? Why exactly would a woman date you if she doesn't feel good in your presence? Likewise why would you date a whiny woman who doesn't appreciate you? It gets to a point in these conversations where we lose sight of the very purpose of dating: someone you want to be around and spend time with. If you go into it with resentment and dread and competition and have to 'put up with someone' that defies the poi…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 05:18 PM
1

I think if you just step out of the apps you find a completely different reality. When I look at who I've been attracted to, who my friends have been attracted to, and which people in my school date people (high school and uni) looks don't really matter. I have plenty of the most mid-looking classmates who date girls their height, taller than them, better looking. My own crushes have been like very random and rarely 'conventionally attractive', same with my friends and all my acquaintances. One …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 05:16 PM
1

Your point is essentially people can be good or trash and your experience depends on where that falls. I don't think anyone disagrees with that but how that applies irl is a different story
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 04:26 PM
1

Sorry it wasn't specifically to OP. But like generally in these conversations where apps are involved the assumption is that only women will look for looks first. Whereas the issue isn't a women issue but rather a greedy people abundance issue. Men literally have a hot crazy scale that's essentially how much disrespect or crazy are you willing to take to date an attractive woman. People try to upgrade if they can and that's encouraged and pushed by the apps and by social media. Men would be even…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 11:42 AM
1

Not quite. OP focused on men going out or intentionally acting to find women who'll have sex with them. Not marry them. Men will discard their partners as well after sex. And it's not as separate as you think since some men will even pay for sex (both directly eg sex workers or indirectly where they see paying for dinner as an investment to get sex that night)
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 04:17 AM
1

I think the problem with your argument is you assume only women do that because they're shallow vile snakes. In reality, men would do the same. It just happens to be that the numbers aren't in their favor on the apps and they have to be 'desperate'. But if a man matches with you then matches with another profile that he confirms not to be a catfish - they will likely ghost you for them. That's how it works both ways when people are shallow
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 04:00 AM
-4

Not quite. The housing market is rules by factors like interest rates, mortgage programs probably, and salaries and employment. That's a quantifiable trend and unless you're in the top 0.000001% who'll pay cash you're generally affected by all those factors. Then even then, housing is quantified per state or province for specific types of houses - flats vs one bedroom vs two bedroom vs single family houses etc - and rent vs buy so even when discussed, it's more specific than a general random mar…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 03:57 AM
-2

Tbh if you treat women as a market and dating as a game when your pool is literally a tiny radius in your country in your city adjacent to your industry or where you hang out and work you're already off. General stats include people you'd never consider dating and people who'd never date you (because of job or politics or religion or location or income gap or etc before even you consider attractiveness). Same for women treating men as a market you bid on
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 11:24 PM
1

Women didn't take those fields over. Most places actually have teacher shortages these days what's stopping men from getting education degrees
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 02:12 AM
9

Expensive gifts you're setting yourself up for gold diggers. Expensive gifts are often not thoughtful anyways. But ya an interested woman shows interest in interacting, planning, carrying convos.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 11:28 AM
2

No? Think Selena and Benny type of attraction 😭 tell me you've never been friends with a woman before
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 08:32 PM
3

I mean do you think social people on happy relationships will be on Reddit ranting about their life on a random Saturday. There is a demographic bias
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 05:36 PM
4

I think you just need to meet better women tbh. There are plenty women who will 50-50 finances and chores and cuddle and watch movies and share a hobby or 2 w you and adopt a dog and idk be mostly central politically.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 04:49 PM
1

I mean it's not about what you say, it's reading the room. Woman looks uncomfortable or uneasy, you back off. When she says no, you don't ask why not, or are you scared, or it's just coffee give it a chance. That's where the creepy element lies. And contrary to popular belief, a lot of the advances hot men do on TV would not be appreciated by women irl regardless of how attractive the man is. Some stuff is just meant for tv
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 01:45 PM
1

Nah it's genuinely just the vibe. I've experience 'attractive' people being creepy and non attractive people being chill.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:53 PM
1

and attraction is subjective and individual. My friends are rarely if never attracted to men I'm attracted to and vice versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:52 PM
3

I think people in general are more isolated and want less people in their immediate space so they keep their circle small. I know so many women who don't care for a relationship not because men suck or anything, but just because they like their life as is and don't see the need to.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:50 PM
–

I personally think DNA tests should be standard at delivery. That way nobody's feelings are hurt and no one gets to make comments about how the baby looks or wtv.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 01:33 PM
1

Eh but then we ended up with the labor unfairly falling on the woman. In caveman terms, in the modern times women are chasing and fighting the animals and also plan how to consume them. You can only live in the moment if someone behind the scenes takes care of everything for you...
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 05:50 AM
4

I feel like people are confusing planning and initiative for dominance. But if you consider family setups, it's usually the moms planning trips and itineraries and whatnot, it's moms managing schedules and appointments, it's moms managing gathering, gifts etc. It's moms overseeing kids education and so on. Inline of see the planning and initiative aspect as filters to finding a man with a backbone otherwise you end up with someone who doesn't stand for anything and that's how you find countless …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 05:49 AM
1

Women are more selective with who they sleep with because more men are open to casually sleeping with someone than women and supply and demand so women can afford to be more selective. With dating, more women are also open to staying single. If no man meets her standards, choosing nobody is also an option. Men are less likely to make that choice I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 11:09 PM
3

Ya but actual dating vs what people say are separate issues. A woman will sit there and tell you she wants a hot employed smart high earning man and end up dating a chopped cheater. A man will sit there and tell you he wants someone genuine and decent and then end up with some an attractive ish girl who takes advantage of him and demand unreasonable thing. In my experience, people who yap the most about spitting red flags usually end up with the most toxic people. Basically there is a huge gap b…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 01:02 AM
4

I think part of it online is that it's a one upping game. Every influencer and comment needs more shock value than the last to generate engagement. When you talk to women about who they've actually dated in the past their standards are in hell
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/26 08:01 PM
2

Exactly. The hot crazy scale exists and men swear by it
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 05:29 PM
–

It takes a lot of effort and time and trial and error to build a social circle that fits your vibe. It took me like 5 years to do that now that I look back on it (and then I moved lol) It takes a lot of hangouts that you come out drained of, a plenty of awful and toxic people. It takes effort and reflection and growth.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 11:58 AM
–

They are actually in my circle... All my yap-7-hours-over-coffee guy friends have no issue finding a gf, including the 'average' looking ones
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 11:54 AM
1

I think smooth talking can delay or soften the blow for everyone, but it only works up to a certain point
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 11:37 AM
–

A lot of men are bad at it too and have no personality besides the dumb social media lingo and generic interests and tastes. Good friends and partners are hard to come by and that's what makes them even more valuable and priceless when you do find them.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 11:33 AM
–

I mean depends... the hot former douchey frat girl who spends a good part of her income on appearances and hours of her day doing her routines and maintaining them will probably value aesthetics and former douchey frat boy type men in dating more than the bookworm with a small circle that has a decent career and does a reasonable minimum for hygiene and looks. If you define success in dating as a static conventional pretty ideal then sure they'll have more success...
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 11:15 AM
1

Not really if you have a friend group and engage in hobbies and all 99% of people can date easy. It starts from hey wanna do this together some time or grab coffee and then goes from there. There's no objective good look for women - just hygiene and like somewhat in shape and looks presentable and can hold a conversation... Proof the bar is low is how many women will end up with objectively very average looking exes with no significant game and red flags that wave at you from a mile away but the…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 06:40 PM
6

No because being happy being single should be intrinsic and not because you can't pull a hot chick that's where the attack is from. Whereas the ladies just go 'i love my peace if someone comes along that meets all my standards then yay but otherwise I'm more than happy alone'
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 02:02 PM
6

To be honest the main difference I've seen with reactions is women will just be like 'im happy alone and don't want to risk my peace' whereas men will be like 'all women suck therefore I learned to be happy alone and now I don't want to date anymore'
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 01:59 PM
1

Ya I def think the necessity of marriage for a relationship will need to be seriously reconsidered eventually because I'm an individualistic gender equal society where the sacrifices in a relationship are meant to be shared equally (careers, finances, chores, etc) that legal protection I guess does become necessary anymore
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/25 11:45 PM
1

Just go for coffee instead of dinner. I've had 5-6 hour chats on first time hangouts w randos. Then splitting is not a huge deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/25 11:09 PM
5

Exactly, and when women add a standard, 3 things can happen. They find someone who meets their standard who wants to be with them. They don't and they're fine with staying single. Or they don't and they lower their standards until finding someone. I don't see higher standards from women as an issue to be honest.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/25 03:51 PM
5

Well no, most empathize. But it gets hard when there are so many posts from men flooding social media about how it's women's fault or delusional or women should be forced to settle or all that. There's also the perception that men should also be doing more in their communities to help address the issue - create safe spaces, destigmatize mental healths, encourage friendships and such the way that women have been doing too. It's not really self inflicted though, it's simply times changing and bein…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 07:09 AM
2

Not really, I've been in a few spaces and even doctors and engineers who had kids still get comments nonstop. But you're right, DEI and social issues in general aren't static and we need to change and adapt to keep up with the times, so policies or initiatives that made sense a decade ago might not be necessary today. Unfortunately, Canada and the States aren't great with moving quickly so it takes a lot longer to do anything as opposed to other Western counties. Bureaucracy and inefficiencies o…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 08:34 PM
2

Im all for mandatory paternity tests and illegal cheating. But you're misunderstanding some factors - dei isn't to hand freebies to anyone, it's evening out playing field from centuries of compounding inequalities that continue to impact certain groups. A woman on average only applies to a job if she meets 100% of the requirements vs a man on average applies to a job if he meets only 60% of the requirements. Boys in school can raise their hand and make mistakes without being too stressed but gir…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 08:10 PM
11

Ya that screams entitlement, and then you complain about a male loneliness epidemic. So what's your solution to men not getting laid? Force women to be attracted to them or what? Nobody's entitled to sex. On the other hand, everybody is entitled to equal pay and equal rights and not getting murdered for saying no. Realistically, marriage and sex and all that inherently benefit men more than women, and women were only bound to it because of lack of choice. Now that choice exists, more women are s…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 06:03 PM
14

'stupid rights' says all anyone ever needs to know mate.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 05:55 PM
52

Also to add to that, 'good men' and 'good women' have no trouble getting in and out of healthy relationships and eventually meet someone to settle down with - so they're not out there loudly complaining everywhere, unlike everyone else
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 02:27 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter