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Fayve27 Archive

View 6 posts and 62 comments by Fayve27 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

We are not, we have a home on about an acre of land.
/r/RedPillWives08/05/24 01:59 PM
2

Yeah I think you're absolutely right. I'm discounting his solutions because it's not my first choice but it's still absolutely contributing to our home. I come from a family of a lot of low-income earners and everyone got their hands dirty, I'm not used to outsourcing so much, but I think it's time I get past that.
/r/RedPillWives08/05/24 01:29 PM
3

I think this is great advice, I get caught up on wanting to feel like he wants to be involved in caring for our house rather than outsourcing. He's often willing to when I tell him I'm overwhelmed, but I'm realizing this is something that is a reflection of me and not practical to focus on. I've been getting pretty good self care, we hire a babysitter twice a week so I can go to the gym and I go out running 2x a week before the kids wake up!
/r/RedPillWives08/05/24 12:01 AM
3

We haven't done a project together in a while. If it's on a weekend one of us watches the kids while the other gets things done. If it's during the week I try to involve the kids.
/r/RedPillWives07/05/24 06:09 PM
3

Probably closer to 50, he goes into the office on weekends to catch up on deadlines and sometimes will code after the boys go to bed. My mother certainly had this take when she visited, but I'm trying to have a level headed take since she's in a very female led relationship, she felt it was incredibly misogynistic how much he expected. I guess the heartbreak I have is that there were so many things I enjoyed doing to show my love for him early on that have now become the norm and taken for grant…
/r/RedPillWives07/05/24 03:30 PM
3

Totally agree with you. Usually I ask if we can hire someone to take care of a job and he almost always says yes. I wonder if I refrained from being the one to organize those calls if it'd feel better? I might be overthinking it, but I hired a handyman to fix a broken door and while it was a relief to get it done and I'm glad we could outsource, it felt like my husband was able to wash his hands of the entire process which I found frustrating since it wasn't negligible to get someone out.
/r/RedPillWives07/05/24 03:03 PM
7

Thank you for such a kind and thoughtful reply. I really appreciate the reminders of how to deal with those frustrations I'm fixating on. Interestingly my husband could sense what was up since I got back from the vet and he sat me down to talk about his plans to get some boxes cleaned up and fix our water filter. I will certainly implement what you said if that energy dissipates. I just hope I haven't been too nasty and naggy so far that I can't course correct back to a softer approach.
/r/RedPillWives07/05/24 03:01 PM
11

Thank you I appreciate your take. I think I've lost sight that him working to get tenure -is- a temporary thing, we're about 1.5-2 years away and in theory his stress should go way down.
/r/RedPillWives07/05/24 02:59 PM
1

Thank you all for your input. It's given me a lot to think about and I agree with almost everything said here. Lots of things to consider about my attitude. My husband I were very vulnerable with eachother about our fears and concerns and I feel like it'll provide us the opportunity for a big "reset" and chance to figure things out with eachother. Thank you for the support here!
/r/RedPillWomen07/08/23 06:34 PM
5

My husband is a tenure-track professor for mechanical engineering. We're in a very low cost of living area and he makes 6 figures just recently, so we're very fortunate to not feel any strain for me to work (I previously was a cake decorator making a low hourly wage, but might consider starting up my own business from home once our kids are older and more independent)
/r/RedPillWomen15/10/21 09:19 PM
3

Not what I expected, I'm sorry for the experience you've had with men. Looking at your post history shows a worrying amount of disdain for women, even so far as suggesting men marry eachother and run women over with a train, or saying you wish you could die and come back as a man. I'm sorry that your relationship with your femininity seems quite damaged right now. To answer your question, no I don't feel 'less than' to men, I love that my skillset can compliment theirs in every natural way.
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/21 03:40 PM
5

May I ask what country you live in? I saw both the comments you deleted after and I'm sorry that it seems like you've had some really bad exposure to low quality men masquerading as high quality. The examples you gave seem very atypical based on my own experiences, so I'm wondering.
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/21 03:29 PM
7

Sounds like you have some particular baggage. Men work harder jobs and die sooner than women, women are treasured and protected by society even if culture confuses the messaging sometimes.
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/21 03:15 PM
97

I don't think there's anything wrong with the way you're doing things, but consider this. When I do my husband's laundry or tidy up a space, that's a way I can show my love and respect for him. It allows him the break from worrying about every particular thing, and he can return the favor by covering something for me. There's chores I'd rather do or not do, and division of labor is a natural part of relationships, and I think a strong advantage of being in a relationship. Obviously that's not th…
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/21 02:43 AM
17

Same. My effort has increased but my results are worse with juggling a child into everything. I'm not concerned, my husband is more interested in me being a good mother than making it to the gym as much as I used to.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/21 12:30 PM
7

This sums it up perfectly. Honestly hope for the best but plan for the worst in my opinion. I personally can do about 2.5 of the 3 things each day and just cycle what gets the most attention.
/r/RedPillWomen10/03/21 01:19 AM
14

I went through it, should be noted at the last page with the scale of 1-100 the directions do not match up with the labels up top. I agree a lot of the wording was very bizarre and it felt like it was trying to corral me into answering a certain way.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/21 07:45 PM
2

Great post and advice! I definitely need to work on this too - I have an unattractive tendency to quickly make his bad moods about me.
/r/RedPillWives22/02/21 06:30 PM
2

Solidarity. I just have hopes that it will improve as my child (and future children) get older and more independent.
/r/RedPillWives05/01/21 02:58 AM
1

I remember always having this fear for no reason at all. I just had this weird feeling in my gut that I might not be able to have kids. One month after marriage we got pregnant on our first possible cycle so idk why I had that feeling but I think it might be normal.
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/20 05:36 PM
2

Joined, thank you! :D
/r/RedPillWives22/09/20 10:56 PM
1

What a sweet message, thank you 😭
/r/RedPillWives22/09/20 12:57 PM
5

I'll look into those books! Last night my husband told me how much he feels like he's letting me down when I say how overwhelmed and exhausted I feel. I think those feelings are natural as parents but it broke my heart that my careless and often petty complaining about my day did that to him. Like yours, I think it would make him so much happier to see me happy. I'm being treated for PPD but its been under pretty goos control! No family nearby and they all had to cancel visits abroad for baby's …
/r/RedPillWives21/09/20 11:19 PM
5

You're absolutely right! I do so much better on the days that I can set up play dates and chat the day away - I don't feel the need to chat at my husband all night when he's exhausted after being in meetings all day. I'm working on incorporating the little one into more chores and so far I think it's helping a little bit. Thank you ♥
/r/RedPillWives21/09/20 10:04 PM
2

Thank you! That's a good reminder and I hope I can implement some of it. Our baby is walking/running around most of the day and my husband gets home usually 30-60 minutes before his bedtime so I'm usually desperate for help by that point or our son constantly runs to daddy since he hasn't seen him all day. He definitely get san "onslaught of wife and baby" as it is now :/
/r/RedPillWives21/09/20 09:48 PM
1

Took me a while to reply but holy crap, I think we might actually be the same person! It's so extra hard lately too, we've been video chatting with my mom every day (sometimes twice a day) since she was supposed to be here now. We both had a good cry the other day since we both know how much easier things would be with all the help she's eager to give but can't since she can't fly from Canada. We're also dealing with the wonky transition with 2 naps. It went great for a few weeks but now that he…
/r/RedPillWives19/05/20 05:07 PM
3

Thank you for the practical advice! We supplement with a fair amount of formula because my supply isn't quite enough (thats been a lifesaver). I'm hoping to cut down on pumping sessions soon to maybe 2x a day eventually. I don't mind doing it, it's just so time consuming! We may look into hiring a cleaner to come through once a month soon - we had someone do it once before the covid things started happening but it might be time to get back to it. On the same strain, I think going back to playdat…
/r/RedPillWives17/05/20 12:17 PM
5

Thank you for the kind words and advice! The concept of finding a proper schedule really resonates with me. We have lots of agreements "He'll take the baby in the morning sometimes" "we'll get takeout once or twice a week", but I feel like if we schedule it ahead of time I'll feel way less guilt and like those things are happening because I'm failing to do them myself. Hubby and I are going to take some time today to mock up a schedule for next week (maybe he takes baby Thursday mornings, we get…
/r/RedPillWives17/05/20 12:13 PM
3

Interesting - had some serious thyroid issues immediately postpartum that are regulating several months later. Definitely very active in my due date reddit groups, it's been a lifesaver! My baby actually has started sleeping 6-7 hour stretches at night some nights, helps so much <3
/r/RedPillWives17/05/20 01:56 AM
1

Oh wow, I hope you're feeling way better now - that sounds like quite the trial. I've been seeing a pelvic floor therapist for a few weeks, she's great! Her assessment also makes me feel a lot better for avoiding sex so far. My doctor never even assessed my tearing at my follow-up, it made me feel like it was no big deal. Getting proper treatment has helped me feel validated in the pain im feeling now. Thanks for your comment ❤
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/20 01:42 AM
2

That gives me some faith that I could have a lot more success by learning more and tracking independently, thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/19 03:05 PM
1

Thank you so much ♥ I had a long talk with my husband this morning and shared a lot of things in this thread, and he's completely on board with taking all the time we need to return to penetrative sex. We definitely have a lot more talking to do, but I feel much more at peace than when I made the original post.
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/19 02:27 AM
3

I'm certainly going to dig into some reading, thank you for the book recommendation (I haven't read it!). I was using an app called Ovia to track cervical fluid, temperatures, periods, and any other symptoms. It uses that information over a long period of time to help give a general guideline of when ovulation/periods would occur. I had been doing this for over a year while we were abstinent before marriage, and it was pretty reliable. The month I got pregnant I noticed discharge in line with ov…
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/19 02:26 AM
7

Just popping in here to say I'm not terrified of having sex with my husband in general haha. We have had a very enjoyable sex life with all of these things. The Catholic church doesn't assign a priest to every bedroom to make sure the sperm all ends up inside of the ladies, or at least not in our parish. Maybe some other couples are different, but we do plenty of things where he doesn't finish inside of me
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/19 02:22 AM
4

Haha lots of incorrect assumptions about me. Yes, I've had sex before my husband and used contraceptive before then, but my partner count is below 5. Not ready for sex for me means incredible pain with penetration and reduced libido/lubrication from hormones of breastfeeding. I'd be happy to describe the muscular tearing of my privates to help you understand and grow compassion. Thanks for your take, but it's incredibly unhelpful.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 04:03 PM
8

Can you point me somewhere about that being a mortal sin? Curious, as I would have thought it venial at worst.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 02:41 PM
6

Thank you for your compassionate answer. My husband has encouraged me to go to pelvic floor therapy which started last week and will hopefully get me closer to ready for sex. Honestly we're both so exhausted with our baby still that sex remains more of a concept than a possible activity, but I agree about trying to be more affectionate so that the lack of intimacy doesn't cause future rifts in our relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 02:11 PM
4

Great idea on the catholic subreddits! I'm going to sit on a lot of this for a bit and see how I'm feeling, but I think getting more education on NFP will be the best choice for my husband and I.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 02:08 PM
4

I'll check out that youtube channel, thank you! Seems like I just need to study up and try a bit harder to see if NFP will fit our needs. I do love the aspect of becoming more in tune with my cycles and my body - it finally provides a good explanation for monthly symptoms that pop up as routine.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 02:06 PM
4

I think this is the advice I needed to hear most, seems like I just need to step my game up when it comes to NFP. Previously I'd do morning temperatures and learning to identify different bodily fluids to anticipate ovulation. I'm still breastfeeding and plan to stick with it for hopefully at least another year, which in theory should prevent pregnancy, but my doctor suggested it's only around 60% effective and some women will start ovulating before their cycle returns. I'm going to check out th…
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 02:04 PM
3

Hey I'm not sure where best to respond so you both can see, but I appreciate both sides of what you guys are saying. I wouldn't ever pursue birth control without my husband's knowledge, although I get that some women may feel it's the best option here. My husband isn't rigid that I can't ask questions, and maybe I understated his support and love in my original post. In terms of me being desperate enough to ask for advice on reddit, I guess that's fair that it looks that way. I usually talk out …
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 02:01 PM
7

I think I need to bring this option up with him again. We broached it in the past and it ended with a sort of mutual "huh, I wonder if that would be okay". Worst case he checks into it more and decides no, but I'm pretty sure he'd entertain it for my sake. Thank you for the suggestion! :)
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 01:47 PM
5

Wow thank you both for the great input! Im still reading other comments but I think you really understand maybe better than I could put into words. What I probably failed to express was that my husband is/has always been super actively involved with NFP and wanting to help as much as possible. The intentions of this post was to have maybe a less emotional idea of how to broach the subject without offending his morals or not appreciating how lovingly patient he's been. I need to keep reading, but…
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 01:29 PM
2

Following for the comments! My baby is 11 weeks yesterday and hasn't been a nightmare, but it definitely has shaken my idea of whether or not I want a big family. I loved being pregnant, but I haven't loved these early stages. I feel like I'm half the wife I once was, and half again the mother I wanted to be. I believe it will get easier, but I do the same thing as you thinking "oh god what if I had a toddler as well".
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 02:21 AM
6

Whoa. OP, ignore this asshole. Good for you for doing some self-reflection and I think there's great advice in this thread. This is not one of them.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/19 08:45 PM
4

These are some great ideas, thank you! We usually end up eating a ton of eggs, and he says that he doesn't mind repetition but I think I get tired of meals before him. Soup is a great call though, maybe with some homemade bread!
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/19 10:15 PM
5

I'm very fortunate in that my husband has the flexibility to drive home from work and spend lunch with me almost every day during the week (we have a routine of going out together on Friday lunches). We both love that time where we can enjoy a homecooked meal together. I often struggle with feeling like I'm being boring or repetitive in what I'm making for him? It ends up being a lot of omelettes, some wraps, and ideally leftovers (although I usually plan to make extra at dinner and we eat it al…
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/19 06:00 PM
–

My husband came home from a guys trip to Vegas where I was an absolute hormonal pregnant mess the entire time he was away (I had no idea I'd react that way until he was gone, I encouraged him to go on the trip). Since he's been back, I feel like hormones have made my mood surge the entire opposite way. I want to cry I'm so in love with my man. He was so compassionate and caring listening to how much I struggled when he was away, and I was so thrilled to hear about the wonderful time he had on hi…
/r/RedPillWomen10/06/19 07:58 PM
2

Guilty as charged! You're totally right haha.
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/19 04:01 PM
2

Yes, we are legally married, but a very good point! I don't have a social security number yet, so we'll have to double check that my name can be included somewhere, even if it's not on the mortgage itself. I picked up "Surrendered Wife" a few months back and haven't made it more than a few chapters in. This is definitely good motivation to read more deeply, because I've heard good things about that chapter in particular a few times. I tried to implement the strategy of "bring your captain your p…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/19 03:59 PM
1

We're going to definitely explore this idea in the near future! I love fitting things into budget and it really is sounding like a good option the more that we think on it. Do you and your husband typically just allocate that money within your budget, or do you have a more physical allowance through cash/particular accounts?
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/19 03:54 PM
1

Thank you for your reply, I think you're totally spot on in a lot of ways! I'm grateful that I have full access to viewing our finances online - he much prefers to not keep close eyes on things, so I've set up our budget and try to track our spending best I can. Last night we applied for a credit card I did some research on (he's always been pretty happy with just using his debit card for all purchases, but with house purchasing on the horizon, we noticed how much his credit score is penalized f…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/19 03:53 PM
1

I went ahead and made assumptions on his behalf based off a conversation we had before we were married. His idea was that since everything he earns is "our money", the idea of having an allowance sort of backtracks because now we're saying that only a small portion of it is "my money". I think now that we've lived with our spending a bit more, it's more obvious that I really struggle to ask for the access to money for spending even if he's happy to give it. We talked some last night, and he brou…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/19 03:49 PM
2

Exactly! My husband is such a saint, he's been very forward since day one that he's thrilled to provide for both of us and wants to do whatever he can to make sure I don't feel like it's "his money" that I'm spending, but there's such an emotional/mental link to earning and spending that it's really hard to break that feeling of guilt.
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/19 03:47 PM
3

Wow, first of all thank you for such a kind, thoughtful response to my post! I think everyone hit the nail on the head in their own way. I love what you said about tackling my anxieties one at a time. I wrote out a list of literally every "to-do" thing that's giving me stress currently, and it helped to see them listed out. Once my husband was home yesterday, I confessed to feeling really overwhelmed about a bunch of things and we sat down and talked for a while. Like other commenters suggested,…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/19 03:46 PM
–

Monday: Chicken picatta with angel hair pasta and broccoli Tuesday: Bratwurst and perogies with caramelized onions Wednesday: We go to RCIA and they feed us there, woohoo! Thursday: Homemade chicken strips and some side I haven't figured out yet Friday: Fasting for Lent! We went to my husband's boss' house for dinner last Friday and they were serving meat, we felt too nervous to say anything so we ate it and feel terribly guilty when we normally avoid meat on Fridays all days of the year. We're …
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 04:57 PM
8

So he wants you to try harder and have sex even when you aren't in the mood, but he doesn't like when he can tell that you're not into it? I get that we're only hearing your side of the story, but I agree with another comment that it seems like he's completely forgotten the point of marriage. It sounds like you've made continuous effort to be sexually available and intimate with him. He needs to be more realistic that it will take time for your hormones to rebalance as you recover from nexplanon…
/r/RedPillWives11/02/19 12:44 AM
15

Following this. My husband gives me his bank card for all grocery and household shopping, and if there's a particular item I "want", I run it by him before making a purchase and he usually says it's fine. An example for today, I need a new pair of boots to deal with winter weather, so after lunch I'm taking the car and his card and am free to spend up to $50 on that. I'll still send him a picture and tell him which ones I pick. If there's something that I really want that costs more than that, w…
/r/RedPillWomen15/01/19 04:11 PM
2

I picked up a Lovense Bluetooth Vibrator that looks like it performs way better than other remote control vibrators (it's designed for subtle public play and connects with a phone app). Sometimes I struggle with a lower sex drive, but I think this will help us to really keep things exciting! I also picked him up a plain but nice black leather wallet to replace one he's had for years that's falling apart. I think I'll add one more thing and get him a nice set of poker chips. He's just recently ta…
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/18 10:01 PM
21

I got married about 6 weeks ago and I've been living with my now-husband since June of this year. I moved from another country, so since I've been here I haven't been able to work. We've really enjoyed getting to experience the "housewife" dynamic, but it's been a struggle for me as well. I'm used to being very busy and active, and now I'm in a new country with none of my friends and work. Definitely picking up new hobbies has helped! I've been dedicating a lot of time to working on my fitness a…
/r/RedPillWomen30/11/18 06:40 PM
–

My husband and I are getting serious into lifting and he decided he'd like to try and put on some muscle over the next few months. I'm wracking my brain trying to think of good high-protein ideas that we can both eat but will work for both of us (he's over a foot taller than I am and needs significantly more food than I do). Love the Harvest Bowl idea!
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/18 10:18 PM
7

Sounds like what he's saying and what he's willing to do are two very different things. My heart goes out to you in this situation. I agree that it sounds like this guy is way too emotionally immature, and he's not willing to make any sacrifices to create a life together with you.
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/18 06:01 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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