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GinSmokeLies Archive

View 8 posts and 9,358 comments by GinSmokeLies on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

Thank you for asking this.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 06:01 PM
2

What do you mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 05:31 PM
1

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 03:22 PM
7

No. My entire reason for dating was looking for someone to marry. Not ever wanting marriage would be a dealbreaker.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:46 PM
7

What if I told you there are ways to get hand-me-downs for your kids without fucking multiple women
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 12:53 PM
2

It's my favorite color. Features prominently in my living room.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:40 AM
4

Not sure what the relevance of that is, but OK.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 10:25 PM
6

The intent of the rule is to prevent people from having discussions with each other that clearly belong on different subreddits) r/TheBluePill, r/TheRedPill etc.) That's kind of what it seems like this is, though. A red piller asking red pillers to give examples of bad female behavior doesn't seem like a topic that really lends itself to debate or discussion. It seems like more of a "red pill example" post fit for TRP. Anyway, I'm not saying any rules are being broken or that the post should be …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 09:20 PM
5

I didn't say anyone can't do anything. I'm not a mod. It just seems like an invitation for circlejerking to me and I don't see the point in it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 08:40 PM
12

What exactly is the point of a RP asking a Q4RP? How is this not just circlejerking?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 07:30 PM
7

Nothing wrong with dating for fun. Eventually she's probably going to ask "Where is this going" at which point I don't think it's good to give her false hope and tell her you want to marry her someday if you don't. That said, ultimately it's on her to end the relationship if she's not getting what she wants out of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 04:29 PM
6

I agree with you to an extent. I don't think it's wise to enter into a lifelong commitment/marriage without vetting your partner at least for similar life goals and values (i.e. do you both want kids? Do they want to live abroad while you want to stay close to home? Are you a devoutly religious person considering marrying an atheist, and how will that affect your life together? etc.) Yes, these things can change over time, but it's better to at least attempt to mitigate the risk of hitching your…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 03:25 PM
1

I'm saying a guy can have a broad chest and shoulders without being muscular because that's the way he's built. All men have a V shaped torso to some extent (unless they're very overweight), but some are more exaggerated than others just by virtue of their bone structure. And yes, building muscle can create or enhance that shape too, but the shape can exist without it. Just like some women have a natural hourglass shape without working for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 02:09 PM
2

You're right. They're hamstering.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 02:08 PM
7

Muscular frame is the same a v shaped torso. No it's not. My husband had a V-shaped torso when he was a 150 lb string bean. That's bone structure. Musculature can accentuate the shape or make it more prominent, but the shape exists independently of musculature.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 02:07 AM
15

Same. This seems like a really long list of things that Chad isn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 02:03 AM
4

Chad has always been the most vague term to me. I was once told on PPD that my husband is Chad because he has real life friends he plays Dungeons and Dragons with instead of playing online. I'm going to go with what I always assumed was the original Chad archetype, which is the all-American quarterback fratboy type (others are free to correct me if this isn't actually what Chad is; like I said, I'm not really clear on the term). In which case, no. That just isn't my type, and I'm not their type …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 03:28 PM
3

RIP
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 06:07 PM
6

Are you joking or do you really not know what Madonna means in this context?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 05:50 PM
2

Lol yeah it's awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 03:17 PM
2

A lot of Walmarts (especially in sketchy areas) check receipts as you're leaving to make sure you don't have any items you didn't pay for. I think it's because shoplifting ha sgone up since they started using self check outs.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 03:06 PM
6

https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6jIIG09Gcg0/U1_rDdSLozI/AAAAAAAAAag/0e1bZMrNbxo/s1600/magic-8-ball.jpg
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 06:26 AM
3

I love whiskey. Get that from my dad I guess. Although he drinks Jack which is yuck to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 03:30 AM
5

you enjoy these male friendships because they aren't actually sexual/romantic...introduce that element and the things you're more attracted to in men will disappear. your perspective on what a "male personality" is based purely on your platonic bonds. a romantically/sexually intimate relationship with another man will not look like what you're describing. This is a very good point.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 06:01 PM
3

OK, well that's my answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:46 PM
1

Gotcha. I saw "Christie" and my mind immediately went to Chris Christie.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:35 PM
13

I mean, yes, single moms are lower status than married moms. I think women are making it clear they don't care about that. Then you've already changed your own view. Your OP doesn't say "CMV: Women don't care about the status of marriage," it says marriage doesn't offer status at all. You just acknowledged that it does.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:33 PM
7

What does that matter to women NOW, TODAY? Women NOW, TODAY, are still very social and group-oriented. We want to be accepted and fit in and seen as part of the in-group of our culture and society. It's in our nature. That might not be a satisfactory answer to you, but as a red piller you shouldn't find it surprising, and you certainly shouldn't think that a few exceptions (career women or women who take pride in single motherhood) negate the general trend.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:25 PM
12

I was also confused about this.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:15 PM
1

Christie-anity I get that this is an intentional misspelling of Christianity but I'm wondering what the significance is? Is there a joke or reference here?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 02:33 PM
3

How could I forget.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 02:29 PM
1

The point is, people on this sub say that feminism didn't actually do anything to gain those rights for women. They just whined and pissed their pants until the benevolent men gave them rights so they'd STFU. I just find it funny that when feminism accomplished something positive, it's "Well, they couldn't have done that without men letting them." Yet feminism is singularly responsible for any negative outcomes.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 02:29 PM
6

The other day I learned on this sub that feminism actually hasn't done a single thing since its inception. Feminists just whine and make a fuss; it's the men who take action and implement things. So you should all be blaming men for these problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 01:05 PM
4

So hang with the dudes. That's called having friends. I don't really get your dilemma. I think most men are attracted to women but prefer the company of men. And I think the reverse is also true; as a straight woman, I much prefer hanging out with women, but I don't consider myself "emotionally attracted" to them. Men and women fulfill different needs in my life. I think a lot of people feel the way you do because of this false, modern notion that a relationship partner is just a friend on stero…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 12:57 PM
8

Doxxing isn't allowed on this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 02:41 AM
7

You couldn't afford me.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 01:39 AM
7

He's the future Elon Musk, show some respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 01:34 AM
6

If anything women get overcharged at auto service places because they assume we won't know any better (and most of the time, we don't.)
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 10:25 PM
2

She probably had IBS or Crohns.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 04:41 PM
2

🍿
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 05:48 AM
3

😂
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 04:49 AM
2

scratches balls
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 04:48 AM
1

Whatever you decide to do, I wish you the best! A career change can be scary but it's worth it to not feel like your soul is dying a little every day.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 03:17 AM
2

My husband had a similar revelation. His degree is in graphic design and he was a graphic designer for a marketing firm for a couple years. He hated being inside all day, sitting at a desk, staring at a screen, rubbing elbows with smarmy digital marketing people all the time. He got laid off from that job and enrolled in the welding program at the local community college. Now he gets to work with his hands all day, and his co-workers are more his kind of people. He's really happy with it, and he…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 01:22 AM
3

Oh God, that's awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 12:44 AM
1

Wait, you're telling me people there actually turn on any lights at all when it rains?! Lucky. Here they drive around in dense fog without even turning their fog lights on.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 12:37 AM
1

And God forbid it starts raining...
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 11:56 PM
1

Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 11:55 PM
1

That's what I was about to say. Obviously someone who's just starting out is going to have a much smaller salary than someone who's been in the industry for decades.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 11:51 PM
1

Aww, that's so sweet! I hope you have a lovely wedding(s) and a fabulous life together.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 08:39 PM
1

I'm not saying you're wrong; you're not. I wasn't speaking to the qualifications needed to teach English overseas, in fact that's one of the things I was referring to when I said there are avenues that don't require the certification. I specifically said that the certification and training course were required to teach ESL in a K-12 school in Texas. You're not wrong, you're just talking about something different from what I was talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 08:33 PM
2

Well, I was talking specifically about teaching at a public K-12 school in Texas (since that's where I and the other commenter both live.) Requirements vary drastically from state to state, and certainly from country to country. And I acknowledged in my other comment that there are avenues for teaching ESL outside of a traditional K-12 setting.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 08:15 PM
2

Aww, that's really great that you guys are willing to do that for your family. It will mean so much to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 08:12 PM
1

Oh no, why two ceremonies? That's the not-fun part! Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 08:03 PM
1

Actually I just looked it up and that's not quite right. You don't have to have an education degree, it can be any bachelor's, but you do have to go through a training program and pass the test.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 08:01 PM
2

Eyyyy, thanks! And same to you, for your flair.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 07:51 PM
2

Wreck 'em ;) (Actually I went to a small private university, but I was born and raised outside of Lubbock.)
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 07:35 PM
1

Yeah, there are definitely avenues that would allow you to teach ESL without a teaching degree; there's a lot of demand for it even outside traditional education institutions. (And worse case scenario, in TX, if you have any bachelor's degree at all you can come a teacher by taking/passing the exam.)
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 07:34 PM
3

Howdy neighbor.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 07:27 PM
2

Can't really avoid special needs anymore, but no. That's true. I guess I thought you were working in an actual special ed classroom, but I guess you're support staff for inclusive classrooms? Anyway, good luck! Teaching wasn't for me but there are things I really miss about it. It's an awesome job for the right person :)
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 07:19 PM
2

I get that men fear the abuse of the system; it was a rhetorical question. My point is that if marriage adds all these additional risks and consequences (and I'm not arguing that it does not, or that men aren't justified in fearing it), it's obviously a bigger commitment. It doesn't make sense to say it's a bigger risk than a nonmarital LTR but not a bigger commitment. To be fair though, those anecdotes you shared could just as easily happen to an unmarried man. Marriage has its own risks, but t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 07:08 PM
1

I used to teach ESL (on a volunteer basis, not professionally) and it was SO much fun and so rewarding. I loved it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 06:59 PM
5

Ah, those sweet sweet teacher bux lol. I taught for a bit. What grade/subject do you want to teach? Still special needs?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 06:26 PM
2

I'm an instructional designer at a public university. I also make between 40-50k.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 06:14 PM
2

This one. I think if you have a commitment ceremony in a common law state, that's still a wedding and the law will recognize it as such, right? I would think so, especially if you go on to call yourselves husband/wife, own property together etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 04:22 PM
1

Yeah so I learned, by bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 04:21 PM
4

Right, it's divorce they have a problem with, not marriage per se. So moving to a common law state might be even worse for them, especially if they want to have one of those sham "commitment ceremonies" and call each other husband and wife as suggested in that other OP. In states like SC and TX, that makes you as good as married, and just as screwed if you decide to split.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 04:13 PM
8

That's what living with a man in a house he owns and having his kids without being married is for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 04:10 PM
1

Interesting. I just looked it up and apparently that's how it is in TX too. I thought you still had to apply somehow, and that's when you prove that you hold yourself out as married etc. But it seems like that only comes up if/when you divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 04:09 PM
1

I think you still have to go through an application process to have a common law marriage be recognized, but I'm not 100% on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 04:00 PM
3

Only in 9 or 10 states, and even then they have to hold themselves out publicly as husband and wife and apply to be common law married (nvm, this isn't true). At which point she would become his actual wife. If she's not legally married to him and not on the deed to the house, she's essentially a tenant. The only thing this woman could get from him if they split is child support, and that has nothing to do with being a wife. Edit: Actually I may be wrong about this; looking into it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 03:53 PM
5

How is she a wife?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 03:38 PM
1

That's a no.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 03:27 PM
8

Lol, I agree. One of the reasons I just wanted a courthouse wedding is that everyone I know who's gone through the process of planning a wedding seemed to think it was pretty miserable and seemed relieved when the wedding was over. We had a courthouse wedding and aside from the fact that I had the flu, it was fun and carefree. I got up at 10am, my friend did my hair and makeup, my aunt took some photos of us and we were married by 1:30. Then everyone went out for BBQ. Easy. I've been to two wedd…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 01:31 PM
19

Then why are men afraid of it? Either marriage is harder and more costly to leave than a LTR, in which case it's obviously a bigger commitment; or it's not a commitment at all any more than a LTR is, in which case there's nothing to be worried about. You can't simultaneously say that marriage is a bigger risk but not a bigger commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 01:20 PM
13

Besides the wedding itself (which is optional), what are the costs of marriage that don't exist in a lifelong LTR?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 01:09 PM
15

Who's going to officiate it? Certainly no minister or justice of the peace is going to preside over a sham wedding. Besides that, I don't want to live a lie for my entire life, whether anyone knows or not. And a lot of important people would know if, say, I wanted to put my "husband" on my employer's health insurance, or make a medical decision for him (or even visit him) when he's in the hospital, or do any of the other things that a legal marriage would allow me to do. You don't seem to unders…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 12:48 PM
1

Of course there are going to be people who don't participate in party culture no matter where you go, whether it's because of religion or other reasons. But for the ones who do, I think it looks basically the same regardless of locale. Incidentally, one of my best friends from high school went to college in Salt Lake City, and I visited her there a few times. She and her friends partied exactly like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 12:24 PM
20

There's no such thing as a marriage the state is not involved in. You can have a commitment ceremony with vows and rings and a fancy dress (assuming you can find someone to officiate it...and that's a big if), but without that government license, it's not a marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 12:21 PM
2

This is fucking hilarious.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 02:15 AM
3

I can assure you it's not just "big city" life. I went to college in Lubbock, Texas, an isolated podunk nothing of a city with, in the words of the Dixie Chicks, "more churches that trees." And party/social life was exactly how you described it in Philadelphia. The characters might have been different, but the stories are the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 01:01 AM
1

I grew up in a different generation in a wildly different environment than atlas and experienced basically the same thing. We were in our early twenties in a tightly knit social circle. People were crashing (and hooking up) on each other's couches. A guy and a girl would disappear for half an hour at a party and everyone knew what they were doing. People were hooking up with each other's best friends, exes, roommates, cousins, siblings. To give you an idea: my husband was my friend's brother's r…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 12:27 AM
2

Ok, I thought that might be what you were referring to. That's a strange thing for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 12:07 AM
2

I had a friend who was blinded in an accident in junior high. He met a girl at a...I guess support group, or rehab for blind people? I'm not really sure, but anyway they ended up getting married years later. I thought that was kind of neat.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 11:58 PM
2

What is the "weird deaf culture"? Genuinely curious.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 11:56 PM
7

29 year old female. 4 PIV sex partners. I've never lied, but I've also never been asked except by my very first boyfriend who was also my first sex partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 07:00 PM
6

All my boyfriends (including my husband) started out as casual sex partners and became boyfriends after a period of sleeping together. I've had sex with one other guy who didn't become a boyfriend, and fooled around with a few more. What made me do it? They were attractive and I liked them. I don't really understand the question, like do you want me to list the specific things I found attractive about each guy? Do I regret it? No. Blueish pill.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 06:53 PM
6

Actual scene from my life: Me: sitting on couch with charcoal mask on, watching Friends on Netflix, eating leftover pulled pork nachos husband's phone rings while he's playing Hearthstone in the next room Husband (on phone): "Oh hey dude. Sorry, I can't tonight, Gin is making a nice dinner and we're going to have an evening at home. I'll get y'all next time. Okay man, have a good night." hangs up and continues playing Hearthstone
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 04:22 PM
11

Not STEM. Doesn't count.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 03:30 PM
2

Hahahahaha
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 01:40 PM
6

Hillary is not and has never been president...
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 10:10 PM
5

I wouldn't put it like that exactly. I consider my husband's family to be my family too, and I adore our nieces and nephews on his side. But it's cool to see my brother as a parent, and my parents as grandparents, so I guess in that way it's more fulfilling to see my bloodline carried on. It's just a new and different perspective on the whole thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/18 11:18 PM
9

My niece was born on Wednesday morning! I'm an aunt by marriage several times over, but this is my first niece or nephew by blood. (In fact, this is the first baby on my side of the family since...me.) She's soooo cute and I'm so excited to meet her next weekend! ♥️
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/18 10:26 PM
1

Again, you're entitled to that opinion, but apparently Prince Harry does not share it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 07:37 PM
3

This is an explanation that would certainly make sense for some women, but by far not for the majority who exhibit this behavior. Women, even friends, end up far happier in those kinds of situations when I take charge. How would you explain that? This doesn't contradict what that commenter said at all. These women are happier when you take charge because it takes the burden off their shoulders. They know that you'll be happy with your choice, so they're no longer responsible for your happiness a…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 07:32 PM
1

Yep. I went into detail about this here.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 07:30 PM
3

I like music. I piddle around on a few instruments (I'm not a great musician but it's fun) and go see live music a lot. I'm learning to sew. I like being outside as much as possible, walking my dog, swimming, hiking, kayaking, cooking out or just lying out in the yard. I like to read, and write a little (creative nonfiction and a bit of poetry.) But honestly I spend most of my spare time either cleaning my house or grooming my dog because I'm a weirdo who enjoys that kind of thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 07:24 PM
2

She's like a C list actress most famous for a cable show. I had never heard of her until she got engaged to Harry.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 06:22 PM
1

It's not only about attraction. Well you're the one who said she wasn't "attractive enough" so my bad for addressing the actual words that you said. So it sounds like you think she doesn't "deserve" to marry a prince. That's fine, you're entitled to that opinion. The fact remains that she did. Deserve has nothing to do with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 06:16 PM
7

Obviously she was, because she did. I don't have this weird sense of justice you seem to have about who "should" get married to who. Did she marry a prince? If yes, then she was obviously attractive enough to marry a prince.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 05:05 PM
11

She is attractive but not attractive enough to be with a prince. I mean, apparently she is.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 03:57 PM
4

Edit 1 hour later: have yet to receive a concrete answer to any of my questions from anyone let alone a self identifying BP man. Why do people do this? Homie, it's midnight (or later for some people) on a Friday night. Give it time.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 04:59 AM
10

That's exactly the segment that set off alarm bells for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 05:15 PM
2

Nah, I totally get why it's annoying and humiliating. It's something I have to constantly remind myself not to do. And when I slip up, I get the mean mug, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 05:09 PM
1

I even do it about shit that doesn't matter. Like someone will be telling a story, and they'll say "Yeah, last Saturday we went to the bar and..." and I'm like "ACTUALLY, it was Friday, I remember because I met you after work." Does it affect the overall point of the story in any way that we were at the bar on Friday instead of Saturday? Is the exact day these events took place actually useful to anyone hearing the story? No. But dammit, they were WRONG and I can't let it slide!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 04:44 PM
20

Or maybe I’m just more naturally feminine than her and thus those were the messages that resonated with me. This is my thinking. I've talked about this before: I grew up with a very stubbhorn, hardheaded, assertive mother who encouraged me to be the same. (She wasn't a career woman, she considers "wife and mother" to be her primary identity, but she's nevertheless a very strong and assertive presence.) No matter how many times she told me to grow a backbone, be assertive and not be afraid of hur…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 03:33 PM
2

M has a perpetual need to be right at all times, which goes as far as wanting to correct random strangers at happy hour who are incorrectly discussing sports statistics - I often have to stop him from doing so. Hahaha, I have this too (maybe it's a xSxJ thing?) and my husband finds it very annoying. Hearing someone say something factually incorrect is like nails on a chalkboard and I have to bite my tongue so hard not to say something about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 03:23 PM
4

What's funny is I can't even figure out WHY that was on the list. Maybe I was going through a zodiac phase or something, who knows.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 03:13 PM
1

What causes a man to be stuck in the red zone? Not meeting her physical attractiveness threshold. If a man is initially yellow, what inputs would sway him towards green and what towards red? Yellow to green for most women would be confident/dominant body language, flirting, masculine vibe, sexualizing the interaction. But as I said elsewhere, whether a guy moves from yellow to green has just as much to do with the woman as it does with the man. If she's simply not in the mood, there's not much h…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 03:10 PM
7

In high school, my best friend and I would make lists of things for fun. Like, one of us would say "I'm bored, give me a list" and the other would say ,"OK, list the top twenty places in the world you want to visit" or whatever. (We were very cool, and had a lot of friends.) Anyway, she once assigned me a list of "36 traits I want in my future husband." She recently came across this list in an old notebook, scanned it and sent it to me. And HOLY CRAP, I was floored at how many items on the list …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 02:53 PM
6

That said, he was raised in drought country and good god I wish he would not let his yellow mellow. Maybe that makes me an anti-environmentalist, but it's just gross. Omg I have this same problem hahaha. Those desert dwellers, man.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 02:02 PM
4

Is foreignsplaining a thing?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 12:51 PM
1

They also have nothing to do all day every day but work out.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 12:24 PM
3

Lol maybe that's it! I do tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 02:33 AM
2

Ooh I have a lady crush on CZJ as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 02:10 AM
1

Keanu Reeves is my husband's favorite celebrity, and he's fond of replying to my text messages with Keanu Reeves gifs. Sometimes we have entire conversations that are nothing but a back-and-forth of Keanu/TSwift gifs. I agree he is an unwatchably bad actor, although I do like the John Wick movies.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 02:06 AM
2

Interesting. Maybe it's something else or I'm just lucky.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 01:43 AM
13

Thankfully, I seem to attract genuinely good dudes (with one notable exception who I've talked about here before.) I always say my husband is the nicest person I've ever met, and I mean it. And it's generally been a pattern that the guys I've dated or those who have pursued me have been nice, courteous guys who respected my boundaries. I largely attribute this to my personality (I'm kind of shy and meek) and the fact that my look is more "cute" than "hot/sexy." I think this combination inspires …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 01:31 AM
3

I've had multiple people tell me I remind them Aubrey Plaza and/or her character on Parks and Rec. I'll take it, although I think it's mostly because of my monotone voice and deadpan-ness, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 11:59 PM
2

She really is. I could talk about her all day. (And do, practically.)
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 11:43 PM
2

Lol. Rihanna is second only to Taylor in the popstar section of my heart. I love her too. I tend to admire people who remind me of myself. Narcissism! Haha yes, I think that's kind of why I love Taylor. We have the same dry, self-deprecating sense of humor. Also, while she's very pretty, she's also kind of gangly and awkward which I identify with, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 11:41 PM
2

NO. It grosses me out.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 10:48 PM
1

#goals
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 10:08 PM
3

I love that she's unabashedly feminine (especially in terms of her aesthetic). I just listed this same reason in answer for why I love Taylor Swift. I've always really admired that about her. As incredibly corny as this probably sounds, I first became a fan of hers back in 2007, right around the time I was coming out of my "not like other girls" phase, and she really inspired me to embrace my femininity and not apologize for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 10:06 PM
4

Anyone who's talked to me for more than five minutes knows that I'm obsessed with Taylor Swift. I think she's beautiful, and a fantastic dresser, but I'm also just fascinated with her as a songwriter, a businessperson and a celebrity. So much so that I wrote a ridiculously long in-depth analysis of her public persona and brand for a Rhetorical Theory class in grad school. (I got an A.) I love how unapologetically feminine she is, and I think she's really charming, funny and smarter than people g…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 09:59 PM
2

This. When I was a senior in high school, I wanted to go to an art school out of state and major in creative writing. My parents said, "You wanna do that, go nuts, but you won't get a penny from us for tuition, rent or anything else." They were only willing to help me through school if I got a degree that offered some kind of job security. They weren't about to spend their hard-earned money on my soul-searching mission. I ended up going to community college then transferring to the local mid-tie…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 08:02 PM
13

Yeah. My family had to put my grandfather in a home after he had a stroke. It was the hardest decision we ever made and we put it off as long as we could, but it got to a point where he was a danger to himself and my grandmother couldn't take care of him (she's 90 pounds dripping wet and couldn't help him get around the way he needed to be helped, nor could she stop him when he, for example, got a wild hair and decided he was going to drive across town to his favorite Mexican restaurant that had…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 04:29 PM
2

Maybe, but saying you're "saving sex for marriage" implies that you intend to eventually get married. Priests, monks etc. don't say they're "saving sex for marriage," they say they took a vow of celibacy.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 03:08 PM
3

I'm this way too, lol. When I was a kid I used to horde dry goods and snacks (cereal etc) in a cabinet in my room because I didn't want my dad or brothers to eat it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 01:04 PM
5

Lol yeah I was wondering that too.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 02:53 AM
3

Omg, my family has that line too. Thankfully it seems to have passed me by, or at least hasn't developed yet (I'm nearly 30; my mom, aunt and one of my cousins started getting it in their late teens.)
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 02:41 AM
2

Yeah, I definitely see how that could get annoying after a while. I generally don't get mad at people for not enjoying the things I do for them or the places I take them. More often I just sabotage my own enjoyment of the thing because I'm so worried about whether or not they're enjoying it. With my husband it's not so bad anymore, because I know him well enough that there's not a lot of guesswork, and also because I've learned over the years that if he doesn't like something or doesn't want to …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 02:31 AM
6

I can kind of speak to this because sadly I kind of fit this stereotype. It isn't because I don't know what I want to eat; when I'm alone or cooking for myself, I know exactly what I'm in the mood for and don't mind making a quick decision. But when there's another person involved (and it doesn't necessarily have to be an SO; it can be a friend, my mom, or whoever), I'm afraid I'll choose something they don't want, and they'll just go along to placate me, and then I preemptively feel bad about t…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 09:52 PM
7

Yellow men by my definition are men she finds physically attractive but hasn't yet developed sexual desire for. These are not the same thing for (most) women. It doesn't necessarily take a great deal of time to get from point A or point B; again, I'm not talking about going out on dates or investing a lot of time and effort here. I'm not talking about negotiating attraction or "making up" for unattractive qualities, because again, these men are already physically attractive to her. I'm talking a…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 04:57 PM
10

No, I'm not talking about money, and when I say "spending time with him" I don't mean going out on dates or anything like that. I mean body language, flirting, kino, sexual escalation etc. For a lot of women, these are the things that create sexual attraction and desire; looks aren't enough to do it. You're right that physical attraction is immediate. Both green and yellow men are physically attractive. But for women, physical attraction doesn't always translate directly to sexual desire or even…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 04:34 PM
14

Honestly, I think whether a guy is a yellow or a green could also have more to do with the woman and how she experiences attraction than it has to do with the man. I think a lot of women don't experience "green" attraction at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 03:23 PM
10

Yes, this.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 03:12 PM
33

In the past I've described female attraction as a stoplight system. Some guys are green (instant attraction), many are red (instant lack of attraction), and a lot are yellow (could go either way; needs more input.) Reds are not attractive to her now and never will be. There's no point in giving him a chance or spending more time with him because he doesn't meet her baseline attractiveness threshold. The guys for whom attraction could grow over time are yellow. They meet her baseline attractivene…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 03:11 PM
2

I'm a low-n woman who hung in those circles and knew several others like me.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 12:54 PM
2

And feminism was very much alive and well in the 70s anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 12:29 PM
2

Yeah maybe that's why I can't answer questions like this, because I don't "picture" things. I know what my type is (broad-shouldered and swarthy) but I can't get down to specifics. I just know it when I see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 04:17 AM
2

Totally agree with this.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 11:25 PM
2

https://media.tenor.com/images/a199dabf8ed6b49b2bfd100aa629e4ae/tenor.gif
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 09:14 PM
4

I never see single mother hate from men. Single mothers always seem to find some man who is thirsty enough to be with her despite her children. Often times these men who already have kids from previous relationships. Yeah, I've observed the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 09:06 PM
2

Hmm. They're not anything special but I don't find them off-putting. The only thing is the production value is pretty bad on the earlier episodes, but it's much better now.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 01:41 PM
2

Generation Why. It's not 100% true crime but that's a lot of what they focus on.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 12:45 PM
1

Aw, thanks Lewis.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 03:13 AM
6

Generally it's wise as a woman to assume that a man striking up a conversation with you out of nowhere is sexually interested in you. It's very very rare that that isn't the case. And like OP said, you can generally tell from tone, body language etc. I'm not saying it's bad, I was never annoyed by it and these conversations were often enjoyable in their own right even if I wasn't interested in the guy. But some guys are annoyed that you "wasted their time" if they talk to you for half an hour on…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 12:43 AM
11

Why do guys strike up conversation with random women in public if not out of sexual interest?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 11:47 PM
9

I think she's talking about a guy who approaches you in public and makes small talk but never actually directly hits on you. For example, when I was younger I used to go to a lot of concerts, and guys would come up to me and talk about the band etc. I knew they were doing it because they were "interested" in me sexually/romantically, but the conversation was casual and not explicitly romantic/sexual. So if I wasn't into the guy, I was never quite sure how or when to tell him "Thanks but no thank…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 11:46 PM
1

I was just commenting on the ab thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 05:35 PM
2

Oh I love belly kisses.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 05:30 PM
7

I'm pretty sure even guys without visible abs enjoy having their stomach/abdomen kissed.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 05:27 PM
8

This is the correct answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 03:31 PM
2

That's actually brilliant.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:21 AM
4

Unfortunately we still have to keep a jar of it in the pantry for the dog.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 11:55 PM
2

Like someone else said, if you have little ones I think the main thing is helping them do something special for Mom. Like a homemade card or something. If they're big enough to do something on their own I don't think the husband really needs to do anything except just be sweet to her. It's Mother's Day, not Wife's Day, you know? IMO it's the kids' responsibility to do something. I'm pretty minimalist when it comes to holidays though, and so is my family, so idk what most people consider normal/e…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 10:36 PM
6

No joke, not long after we met, my husband and I bonded over our mutual hatred of peanut butter. We were having a "weird facts about me" conversation and I said I had never eaten a PB&J sandwich. His eyes got all wide and he said "Are you serious? Oh my God, me either!!! I HATE peanut butter!" That's pretty much when I knew he was the one.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 10:23 PM
3

Didn't text me back? Let's send another message and check online status. They are/were online? Clearly doesn't love me anymore, time to jump off a bridge. Hasn't been online all day? Clearly dead or dying somewhere. Luckily this has improved greatly (my handleing of it, not my brain) but it definitely was an issue. I soooo relate to this.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 09:37 PM
7

I'm really needy and require a lot of affection, attention and reassurance to keep from going insane. (This behavior resulted in a come-to-Jesus with my husband early on in our relationship; he nearly dumped me over it.) I have periods of depression every so often that make me pretty miserable to be around. I have a tendency to be passive-aggressive. I will make you live with cats. Don't like cats? Learn to or be gone. I don't do a lot of grooming or primping and dress pretty casual. This isn't …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 09:21 PM
3

Oh I'm so sorry. I hope you get good news. That sounds awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 08:47 PM
5

Happy Mother's Day to all the PPD mamas!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 06:37 PM
7

What do you mean "when the females are in charge"? Do you think we were, like, forcing these guys to hook up with us without taking us out on dates first? Yes, the guys I hooked up with and dated were normal guys and this was how people got together in my social circle. We were in college. Who's going out on fancy elaborate dates in college? No one will ever convince me this isn't how most young people date and find bf's/gf's. Maybe it's different for the 25+ crowd and they go on more structured…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 02:27 PM
2

I will also gladly sign your position as I am against tainting chocolate with any sort of nut or nut derivative (see my top-level reply to this thread.)
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 04:20 AM
7

I agree with this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 04:16 AM
5

Oh, also, sour candy (like sour patch kids, sour straws, war heads etc.) is so gross it is actually offensive and every time I eat it I literally get angry. It is so repulsive to me that I'm convinced the entire world has conspired to troll me by pretending that people actually voluntarily eat this shit and enjoy it. Please do not bother to argue with me about this. I know I'm right. #staywoke
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 04:10 AM
1

Lol, yep. I had to remind him today that we need to book our hotel room for his family reunion next month -- which I knew because his sister texted me, and not him, the hotel information.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 04:07 AM
1

🐷
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 10:54 PM
15

I never went on "first dates." My relationships generally followed the trajectory of meet dude in social setting (party etc.)>like dude>flirt with dude>make out with dude>keep running into/making out with dude>sleep with dude>dude is now my boyfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 10:45 PM
2

I'm his personal cheerleader. I think he hung the moon, and treat him like it. I cook and clean. I act as a liaison when it comes to family stuff that he thinks is boring or just isn't good at. I'm sweet and affectionate. I give him a backrub every day when he gets home from work. I talk him up to everyone I know; my family thinks the world of him. I pull my weight financially and have supported him when he was unemployed or going to school. I have great legs and boobs and hate wearing clothes w…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:47 PM
1

Nope, you are a babe, can confirm.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:10 PM
3

I would think that for most men, a low-n woman with a proclivity for kinky sex is pretty much the dream.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:03 PM
4

Peanut butter is disgusting and defacing good chocolate by combining it with peanut butter should be a crime punishable by death.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:01 PM
3

I want the totality of the human experience, and that includes heartache and pain and loss. Of course I'd like to minimize risk and pain where possible, but not at the expense of a full dynamic human life.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 04:29 PM
1

Lol, yeah, I got on a "natural hygiene" kick for a few months in my early twenties and...ew. 0/10 would not recommend, especially if you live in a hot climate like I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 03:40 PM
3

Omg hi!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 03:33 PM
1

Chris Evans does nothing for me without a beard, but with one he's hot AF. Which is weird because I generally don't like beards.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 11:07 PM
2

My friend's husband is the spitting image of young Jake G. She's a lucky lady.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 11:06 PM
1

Haha, I actually thought about that when I was gathering those links. Idk what it is about Jeff Bridges. I think he looks like a lot of the salt-of-the-earth men I grew up around, so that's part of it, but I just find something about him really sexy and I can't quite put my finger on what it is. He's manly in a way not many actors are these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 09:03 PM
2

I sometimes think that man-hips are equivalent to a woman with broad shoulders and thick waist/narrow hips. OMG yes. There was this guy in college my friends tried to set me up with. We hung out a couple times, and he was cool and had a cute face, but for some reason there was just 0 attraction there for me. It took me a while to figure out what it was, but I eventually realized it was his body shape. It was sooo feminine and... hippy. It just didn't flip any switches at all. My husband isn't ta…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 07:16 PM
4

She's lovely.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 05:22 PM
8

This thread is fucking delightful because of Lewis. I'm giggling.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 05:21 PM
3

Young Liz Taylor was unbelievably gorgeous.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 05:20 PM
2

That Joan Jett looking girl is really pretty.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 05:09 PM
2

Lol, you beat me to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 05:04 PM
1

Yes! I knew he looked like someone else but I couldn't place it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 03:35 PM
2

I think she's definitely at least bi. I sadly can't find it (I tried really hard a couple weeks ago), but at one point there was a master post on Tumblr with all the evidence and some of it was extremely convincing.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 03:19 PM
1

Alas, I don't think I would go gay for Tay. (Although if her bestie Selena was invited I may reconsider...) I would settle for hanging out at her Nashville house, petting her cats and letting her take me antique shopping. Taylor plz
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 03:13 PM
1

This is just a conclusion based on your logic. Yes and it's a correct conclusion. What is immoral about the guy breaking up with his gf to date someone hotter? If society worked the way you thought however there would be nonstop chaos. It DOES work that way. People break up with people all the time for all kinds of reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 03:12 PM
2

I used to LOOOOOOVE Joel Madden from Good Charlotte and Adam Lazarra from Taking Back Sunday - both aged horrendously. Goddamn you weren't kidding. Sad day.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 03:11 PM
1

Lol. I love Harry Styles even with his Liberace Junior (lol) vibe.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 03:08 PM
2

Taron Egerton He is like the opposite of my type facially, but he does have a perfect build.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 03:07 PM
2

Solid list.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 02:46 PM
2

Hot damn. Young Tim Cain was quite a cutie as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 02:45 PM
3

That hair tho
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 02:44 PM
2

Oh that's awesome. He's really nice. Some friends of mine have gone on tour with him as his opening act a couple of times (that's how I got to meet him.) A rodeo cowboy with a heart of gold...the dream.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 02:40 PM
2

He is the best part of that show for me. So good.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:58 PM
1

True to brand as always.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:50 PM
2

Not going to put him on my official crush list, but I recently learned that young Mitt Romney was hot like fire and I'm still having trouble processing this information.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:48 PM
4

Omg yay thank you. I love these threads. My OG celebrity crush since I was like 12 is Brian Bell from Weezer. This is him circa 2002. This is him today. He has aged alright, though I'm not a fan of long hair on men. Still I'm certain I'll scream like a schoolgirl when I see him next month. The musician Ryan Bingham. Literally the perfect man. He hugged me once like eight years ago. I'm still not over it. Young Javier Bardem, who my husband resembles a bit. Ain't nothing wrong with present-day Ja…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:31 PM
1

Interesting, how is it a red flag?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:37 PM
1

Ok, so when does a relationship become committed? When you say I love you? When you move in? After 2 years? 5 years? 10 years?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:25 PM
1

I agree with you 100%. "Never" is a valid answer to this question and it's one I agree with. Answers on other threads about this topic seemed to suggest that some people think it's immoral or wrong in some way to end a relationship under certain conditions. So I was curious where those people draw the line.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:24 PM
1

Yes that's 100% true. He has no moral obligation to stay with his girlfriend, and if he meets someone he likes more, why shouldn't he pursue it? I feel like you're trying to "gotcha" me but you didn't say anything I disagree with.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:22 PM
1

Pretty sure we've had a few of those, but it's been a while.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 04:09 AM
1

Interesting. Had no idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:25 AM
2

A, I've literally never heard of a wedding ceremony without an exchange of vows. What would that even look like? B, there are implicit vows in a Christian wedding, if the couple are devout practitioners of the faith and not just culturally Christian.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:17 AM
1

Perhaps being more selfish and judgmental during the dating phase would prevent some dysfunctional marriages. This is an excellent point.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:29 AM
1

Yeah exactly. And I mean, I don't want to make out like he was beating the shit out of me or anything; we were fighting, and in a moment of frustration he pushed me. But it crossed a line for me, and I had wanted to end the relationship for a while for various reasons, and that incident was just the last straw. But I still had room for compassion for him. He was going through a really terrible time at that point in his life and unfortunately he took it out on me. I actually broke up with him by …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:27 AM
1

Interesting how many ladies here have long haired fellas. I'm married to an ISTP too :)
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:49 PM
4

Exactly. What he described is almost the exact opposite of what I see on this sub. I think most of the women here acknowledge that our husbands and boyfriends are normal dudes, and the incels insist that we must actually be married to 6'2 male model adonises because these are the only men women notice.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:39 PM
5

I would agree with this.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:21 PM
1

Ohh I see. I thought I remembered you celebrating when they won the Super Bowl, I guess I just assumed that's where you lived.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:20 PM
3

I agree. I don't think this makes the question flawed, though; clearly there are people who think differently and I'm interested to hear from them. "Never" is a perfectly valid answer, and one I agree with.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:19 PM
1

Haha, my husband is a huuuuuuge Cowboys fan. You're from Philly though right? So that's understandable.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:10 PM
8

Can you link to the studies that show this?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:00 PM
3

Yep, totally agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:53 PM
1

Is it moral to break up with someone because you no longer love them?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:46 PM
1

At the point someone made a promise not to break up. Do people really do this outside of a wedding or similar commitment ceremony? Genuinely asking.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:45 PM
1

Generally speaking though, I think the main area where morality is clearer is the how rather than the why. Totally agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:43 PM
7

I agree with this. I probably should have specified nonmarital relationships in my OP; that's more what I'm asking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:22 PM
2

If one promises to stay with another person no matter what, breaking that promise could also count as "immoral" or "unethical". I agree, which brings me to another question that I almost included in my OP but left out in the interest of focus and brevity. Are people actually doing this in non-marriage LTR's? I get the impression that yes, they are, which is kind of crazy to me. I've had conversations with boyfriends along the lines of "I want to be with you forever, I see a future with you, etc.…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:20 PM
1

Lol. Thankfully my husband didn't inherit the Astros fan gene; he just hates baseball in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:17 PM
2

My two closest friends have both been divorced (well, one is divorced and one is currently in the process.) More than anything I just feel sorry for them; I don't find their position enviable. Maybe that will change when I'm middle-aged, but I just can't imagine the mindset of someone who wants to hop on the divorce bandwagon because all the other girls are doing it. I'm also much more influenced by my family than my friends or other social acquaintances, and the precedent set by my family is th…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:15 PM
7

Yeah. I've only ever been the breaker-upper once, and I had a very good reason (he got physically violent with me) and I still felt horrible about it. I still don't think it's morally wrong, but it's not a good feeling to know you're hurting someone you once cared about (and possibly still do care about.)
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:12 PM
2

The men who think this way could answer that question much better than I could. But, my guess is that they've had bad experiences with women and don't have examples of loyal, commitment-minded women in their life to convince them otherwise. I don't think I'm a unicorn, but I do think I take marriage and commitment more seriously than most people. I have my upbringing to thank for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 09:03 PM
3

Female.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 08:50 PM
6

It's meant to cause that. FINALLY! lol What? I answered that way in my first comment and you told me it wasn't valid because I was dismissing the boundaries of the hypothetical. So I'm not sure what this "FINALLY!" is about, since this has been my position since the beginning of this conversation. It's interesting to see how RP holds the right praxeology there What do you mean by this? Edit: At the end of the day, I don't consider breaking up with a boyfriend/girlfriend to be an ethical question…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 08:22 PM
4

OK, I'm going to leave hypothetical world and answer this realistically about my life, my relationship and how my brain works. Otherwise I don't know how to answer the question. No, there's not a chance of that. Because realistically, I would never get to the point where I thought of some other guy as "Mr. Right," for the reasons outlined in my first comment. I have complete tunnel vision when I'm in a relationship, and especially so now that I'm married. I don't entertain other men as options, …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 08:13 PM
1

Haha, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 07:13 PM
5

It was before the edit. Ok, so the hypothetical is that I somehow know for an absolute fact that I would be happier/more compatible with this person? In that case, I still wouldn't end my current relationship, because I'm married and I believe marriage is a forever sort of deal. Keeping my marriage and family intact is of higher priority to me than my personal happiness. If I wasn't married, yeah, I'd probably break up with the current guy and pursue Mr. Perfect.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 07:10 PM
11

If I'm spending enough time with another guy to even know all this about him, I already fucked up and my relationship isn't as happy and fulfilling as the hypothetical suggests. If it was, why would I be spending so much time with another guy? And if I haven't spent much time with him, I'm basing my idea that he's a "perfect match" on limited, shallow interactions that don't tell the whole story. It would be stupid to drop a perfectly good relationship to pursue something with a near-stranger wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 06:52 PM
5

Physique: Average height. Slim but strong. Broad-shouldered. Gorgeous caramel skin, wavy black hair, brown eyes, glasses. Voice: Hispanic Texan accent (it's a very specific thing, don't know how to describe it) with a slight lisp. Body language: Frantic and energetic, yet cool. Personality: Subdued. Witty. Curious. Creative. Loyal. Adaptable. Level-headed. Friendly. Kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 05:45 PM
1

At this rate he'll be getting a gold star in no time!
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 02:40 PM
12

This. I have guys who I would call friends, but I don't have this weird reddity notion of friendship where the word "friend" is reserved for only the most intense and intimate relationships. By that definition I don't really have female friends either. Do we hang out and do fun stuff together? Would I invite them to a BBQ? Then they're my friend. And there are men in my life who fit in that category.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 01:59 PM
1

Except that kids get their intelligence from both parents (in fact, I believe male intelligence is tied to the matrilineal line.) So we'll be getting less intelligent men too.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 01:19 PM
1

Meanwhile I grew up in a majority hispanic county in a majority hispanic state and married into a hispanic family, and I literally couldn't tell you the last time I saw someone flying a Mexican flag outside of Cinco de Mayo. But OP works in sales!, so I guess he's the expert.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 03:36 PM
1

Haha. I remember watching a show on TLC a few years ago about a woman who breastfed her kids until they "didn't want to anymore." One of the kids was like 7 years old. My exact reaction was "If your kid is old enough to ASK FOR YOUR BOOB VERBALLY, it's time to stop breastfeeding!"
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 12:56 PM
5

BRB, calling my Hispanic Marine father-in-law, wounded veteran brother-in-law, sister-in-law in the navy and border patrol agent brother-in-law to tell them to GTFO of America.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 03:44 AM
3

Lol well that's pretty obnoxious with or without breastfeeding
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 01:00 AM
5

Why did they have their babies at work? Or do you mean pumping?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 12:36 AM
13

I think people really overestimate the amount of boob you see when a woman is breastfeeding. I've literally been sitting across from my friend having a conversation for a good twenty minutes before I even realized she was feeding her baby. I thought she was just holding/cuddling her.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 12:22 AM
1

Ah, that makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 05:15 PM
2

Lol yeah it does sound like that. I'm not sure where the name came from.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 04:57 PM
3

Fanfiction where two male characters get it on.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 04:56 PM
6

I can see how if you're trying to build a blog or something and trying to network with guys who can promote your content that you'll try to be a bit more "human" and vulnerable by sending pics with the goal of establishing a "mentorship" relationship or something like that (not sure that's the right word, but still). Putting a face to a name a very well known tactic that helps you get remembered. Also, in a sphere where the women are often accused of being men pretending to be women, I can see w…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 02:53 PM
3

inb4 "You're all lying, every woman on the internet is a fat legbeard with neon hair" and/or "You're all arrogant bitches for answering the question that was posed to you."
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 12:52 PM
5

Physical: I'm physically attractive but have low self-esteem so I don't think of myself as a hot girl or have the attitude/chip on my shoulder some hot girls have. I look young for my age. I'm thin but curvy (hips + boobs; ass men will find me woefully lacking.) I have pretty eyes. I have impeccable oral hygiene so my breath is always minty fresh. I take my SO's preferences into account when dressing/styling myself. I wear minimal makeup if you're into that sort of thing. Non-physical: I'm low m…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 12:35 PM
8

Ahahahahahaha. I knew there had to be some agenda here. Hilarious.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 02:46 AM
10

OP isn't like those other Red Pill Women.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 01:17 AM
10

As my friends The Teens would say... this tea is piping hot ☕
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 12:55 AM
8

20% of internet echo chambers are to blame for 80% of nonsense
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/18 04:20 PM
2

Sexism? On my PPD?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/18 03:22 AM
1

He's building a world class straw man of a conversation yesterday about how the legal nature of marriage makes it a more binding commitment than a bf/gf relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 11:11 PM
3

are your expectations the same at 2years vs at 3mos? No. At three months you're still feeling each other out and probably haven't even said "I love you" yet. At two years (for me, at least) you're starting to build a life together and working toward marriage. do only public declarations of commitment made in front of friends and family matter? It's all that really matters to society at large, and usually it's all that really matters to the families of the individuals involved. But their nonpubli…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 08:47 PM
1

Do you think a friendship and a romantic relationship are the same, though? I think it's easier to deal with something difficult in a friendship because the stakes are lower and a friend isn't as intertwined with your life as a romantic partner is. People screen romantic partners for all sorts of things that they don't screen friends for. Like, for example, I know you don't want kids, so you don't want to date someone who wants kids. But I doubt you cut off friends because you find out they want…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 01:43 PM
1

My best friend has lupus and suffers from all the symptoms you described, although it's mostly under control now and her flare-ups are rare. She always tells guys up-front that she suffers from this disease and to not be surprised if she suddenly gets sick and can't do anything. She started dating a guy about a year ago who took her warning in stride and didn't think it was a big deal...until a few months later when she had a flare-up and he saw exactly what he was dealing with. He ended up brea…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 12:45 PM
3

Men leave more often during illness, women leave more often during unemployment. That's what I've heard anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 02:36 AM
2

She wasn't replying to the OP, she was replying to this comment about a wife leaving a husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 10:48 PM
1

Ditto.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 06:06 PM
19

I'm not sure I ever really became "red pilled" the way you're describing. My parents always raised me to be pragmatic and realistic when it comes to relationships. I never had any delusions that all men were nice (I saw plenty of evidence to the contrary growing up) or that love was some fairy tale soulmate kind of thing. So I never really had any romantic delusions to squash. But I guess one moment kind of sticks out in my mind where I realized just how much men took notice of my physical form.…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 01:35 PM
4

I'm still confused. What would you do with this information in the future?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 04:12 AM
8

The eternal question.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 02:05 AM
4

I think it's fairly safe to assume that the common understanding between partners in a relationship is that there is a certain expected commitment to making the relationship work, and that goes beyond maximizing the opportunistic self-interests of the individual. Again, does the longevity and seriousness of the relationship matter? Surely people who have been dating for a few months don't have a commitment to "making the relationship work." Dating is all about figuring out if you even want to co…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 12:03 AM
6

Why would you need to ask her weight? If you see her in person (which it sounds like you're describing) and she's not too fat for you, I don't understand why the number matters.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 11:50 PM
4

The problem is that this pragmatic approach to love (and relationships in general) is not really congruent with its common understanding. I don't think soulmates and "spiritual love" is the common understanding for most people, at least not most people with actual relationship experience. It's obvious that people want to get something out of their relationships and will leave if they're not getting it. Leaving someone for mundane reasons simply exposes this dichotomy. Which is what I already sai…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 11:14 PM
3

Then why do you fault a person for looking for that? If you admit that that's what love actually is in reality, it would be stupid for someone to seek the spiritual "soulmate" kind of love that doesn't really exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 10:59 PM
3

Oh, so a made-up fantasy that has nothing to do with what love actually looks like in the real world.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 10:56 PM
4

wtf is "love in the spiritual sense"? And where did she ever say she loved him at all? She didn't say how long they were together. People aren't automatically "in love" in a relationship; love takes time.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 10:51 PM
3

Lots of people care about the destruction of familial values. Women don't seem to enjoy being single moms. And the economy isn't better off with them running around. I'm saying who cares about what outsiders think about feminism? I don't. Why do you? If anything, you should be glad if normal people find feminism hypocritical and dishonest. It means their message gets less traction. then we should care about their intellectual dishonesty. I still don't understand where you're seeing intellectual …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 07:36 PM
3

OK, I apparently misconstrued OP's stance, and yours by extension.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 07:27 PM
4

I apparently completely misunderstood both you and /u/Callandro. I thought your point was that feminism wasn't advocating FOR the preservation of the nuclear family and marriage, and that they should provide a "counter narrative" that advocates for such things. That's what I found bizarre. I assumed that because of this sentence in your OP: Feminists today do not have a platform of advocating family. Anyway, no, obviously the complete destruction of the family unit and marriage as an institution…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 07:25 PM
8

I don't. The movement has moved onto other matters because their goals w/r/t marriage were largely achieved. Feminism was never about preserving families or marriage, so why would they need to provide such a narrative? Why would you expect them to? Edit: Also, yes, it's not analogous because I didn't make an analogy.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 07:16 PM
4

When did feminism ever claim to be about advocating family?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 07:15 PM
11

It makes sense to criticize it from its own premises. It's disingenuous to criticize it for not being something it never claimed or aimed to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 07:05 PM
1

Wow I can't read.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 06:37 PM
3

Yeah, I was saying elsewhere in this thread that female celebs do have "groupies" of a sort, they're usually just more the crazed stalker/kidnapper type.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:51 PM
2

A groupie's primary goal is to get backstage or on the tour bus and FUCK the performer. Sex is part of being a groupie. There are people who are big huge fans and might buy a million albums and go to 100 concerts and meet the person, but if they're not trying to fuck them (or at the very least sexually attracted to them), they're not a groupie, they're just a big fan. That's why Atlas emphasized STRAIGHT male groupies. It's not because "gay men aren't men." It's because gay men aren't trying to …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:30 PM
6

"Will you agree to get a paternity test for any children we may have?"
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:21 PM
6

I don't disagree with your overall point which is why I commented under automod. You're right that men obsess over hot women whether they're normal women or famous, whereas women obsess over famous men just because they're famous. I agree with you. And female celebrities don't have that many more stalkers than do ordinary women This is just wrong. I don't know a single woman who's had a stalker like the ones in those links. Breaking into your house and using your shower, accusing you of being an…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:16 PM
5

"Men" in general don't, but female celebrities do have male stalkers. See: http://www.tmz.com/2018/04/20/taylor-swift-home-break-in-shower-man-arrested-nyc/ https://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/beyonce-wins-court-order-against-1696334 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3425418/Rihanna-s-alleged-stalker-death-threat-posted-selfie-outside-home-sent-singer-masturbation-video.html etc. But yes it's far more rare than the female groupies of male celebrities. A female celeb might have…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:08 PM
15

None of this is acceptable. For Christ's sake just be normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:07 PM
4

I don't think every girl has male "stalkers" like female celebs have stalkers. An orbiter isn't a stalker.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:00 PM
12

Straight male groupies are called stalkers.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 03:46 PM
4

Don't kink shame me.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 12:57 PM
3

Yeah that's actually what I was thinking. The gay relationship dynamic doesn't really seem conducive to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 05:19 PM
3

Is there gay cuckold porn? Genuinely curious. I never thought about it before.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 04:50 PM
2

Yes -- just my way of saying I have nothing to add, but you made a great point :)
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 03:42 AM
3

💯
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 03:26 AM
1

I'm 5'7, and I like a guy to be taller than me, but he doesn't have to be significantly so. My husband is 5'10 which is fine. My ex was 6'3 and that was fine too, but I didn't consider his exceptional height to be a bonus. I also don't wear heels which helps I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 09:53 PM
3

What OP is calling "emotional affairs" are behaviors that I think should be avoided because they can lead to a physical affair. Yes exactly. I couldn't quite put it into words but this is what I was trying to say. I just don't like the way "emotional affair" tries to put it on equal footing with actual cheating. It leads to reasoning like the OP is doing: "Well if women can talk to therapists, then a man fucking a prostitute must be equally as good/bad." I think there are definitely degrees of b…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 05:58 PM
5

No, I agree with you. I'm saying what makes "emotional affairs" an issue (or what we call emotional affairs) is that they are conducive to physical cheating, and more often than not end up that way. What's the first thing someone asks when they find out their partner is having an "emotional affair"? "Are you fucking him/her?" It all comes back to physical infidelity.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 05:52 PM
7

The problem with emotional affairs is they almost always lead to physical affairs.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 05:27 PM
4

I've seen sublime and can confirm that she is a babe.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 03:00 PM
3

I know two men in the top 1% of height - my cousin (6'8) and one of my friends (6'10.) Both have reported their height sometimes being a detriment to their dating life. As u/highog said below, there seems to be a sweet spot for girls who really care about height, somewhere between 6'0 and 6'4. After that it has diminishing returns because the guys start to look freakish. Also, it's difficult for guys that tall to be well dressed. I've never met anyone in the top income percentile, I don't think.…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 02:34 PM
4

I have no idea. I'm not saying there is one, I'm saying I get the impression that you expect there to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 01:45 AM
3

I think that's because people don't really understand what you're asking in this OP. As in, whether you're asking us to answer your question or just for us to recommend another sub. What I'm saying is, take whatever you wanted to post at AskFeminists and post it here, with a Q4Women flair. You'll get better results that way. But, honestly, you're going to get polarized responses because people have different opinions on stuff like this. It kinda sounds like there's a canned feminist answer you'r…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 12:31 AM
4

I have a pretty strong preference against facial hair. I like faces, and I don't like when they're covered up. That said, it's not something that will turn me off an otherwise attractive guy, and for some dudes with more youthful or feminine features, facial hair can make them look more masculine. As others have said, it really just comes down to the individual man and the individual woman he's trying to attract. There are a lot of variables.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 12:20 AM
2

Honestly, this sub is probably the best place to ask something like that if you're interested in hearing women's/feminist's answers. Just flair the post as"Q4Women."
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 12:12 AM
3

This is an excellent breakdown.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/18 05:01 PM
6

Sounds boring.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/18 03:21 PM
13

Is it really a net positive for everyone to avoid bad relationships, though? I've had a couple, and while I'm glad they ended, I'm also glad they happened. They taught me all sorts of things, including what I can live with, what I can't, how to assert myself, how to work through conflict (and when to just call it off instead), etc. etc. People are SUPPOSED to go through pain and heartbreak and bad experiences, it's how we learn and grow.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/18 06:52 AM
3

Men can get WIC too if they are the primary caretaker of a child.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 10:58 PM
2

Yes, ambulatory visit just means outpatient care. That includes preventative care. He probably thinks it means "going to the hospital in an ambulance."
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 08:30 PM
3

I don't need to shit talk your country, you're doing a pretty good job of it yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 06:24 PM
8

Lol so now emotional advertising only works on women and "retarded southerners." I'll concede that ads targeted to men generally contain more specific information about the functionality of the product while female-targeted ads focus more on "feelsy" things like safety and entertainment. But ads for men are still always wrapped in emotional language and presentation, because that's what gets people's attention initially. No matter how awesome the product is, a guy reading a spec sheet for 30 sec…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 06:19 PM
11

Show me the ad you're referring to. I guarantee there's emotional language and imagery in there too. I'll agree that male-targeted ads contain more specific information about the product's functionality, but it's still wrapped in an emotionally and aesthetically pleasing package. It's not just thirty seconds of a white screen listing all the specs. Because that wouldn't catch anyone's attention and it wouldn't make anyone want to buy the product. This ad is a good marriage of the two. It gets in…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 06:09 PM
7

Yea it's not the place to get into specifics because the people you're advertising to don't give a shit about specifics, that is my point. Yeah, but I'm saying this is true no matter who you're advertising to, men or women. The only car commercial that would peak the interest of me or my friends is one in which they tout a few impreswive stats, your "100% emotion" idea in itself is representative of the feminine skew towards advertising. No, it's representative of extensive research into what PE…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 06:05 PM
6

No, it's not. That's what grandmothers are for. Aunts. Sisters. Cousins. Family. All those people have their own jobs and families to provide for and take care of. I agree, ideally, people would help each other out and raise their kids this way. But that's not the way it is for most people in 21st century America. I don't even know anyone making 1000 euros a month, let alone paying 1000 euros to put their kids in daycare. Okay? I don't know what to tell you. I do. I'm not European. So those two …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 05:43 PM
9

It depends on the kind of car being advertised, and the market they're advertising to. In Texas I see a lot of ads for Ford/Chevy/Dodge trucks and they always feature a burly man using the truck to haul shit around. But honestly, having worked in marketing, I can tell you an advertisement isn't the place to get too into specifics like that. The advertisement is a tripwire that piques people's interest in the product. There are other marketing materials later on in the process that get into that …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 05:35 PM
6

Childcare for newborns is expensive. Even cheaper daycares are around $400-$500, and a private nanny is even more. They actually live in a very low cost of living area too; where I live, I know people paying $1000+ on daycare. I agree it's a lot of money, but at the same time I understand not wanting to drop your baby off at some shithole white trash daycare to save a few hundred bucks. What does the wage in Spain have to do with my brother and his wife in Texas? A huge chunk of their income is …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 01:40 PM
7

Yes that's very true. Both sexes are guilty of thinking their spending is justified and the other's is frivolous.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 01:36 AM
22

I know one couple with a cheapskate husband/spendthrift wife -- my brother and sister-in-law. She has expensive taste, and he as my mom likes to say is "so tight he squeaks when he walks." They're about to have their first baby and have been struggling to find childcare for when my SIL goes back to work; my brother thinks $700/month for the nicest daycare in town is outrageous but his wife doesn't want to put the baby in a cheaper one. (For reference, combined they make upwards of 180K a year.) …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/18 12:08 AM
3

When has she ever claimed that?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/18 05:16 PM
3

Have a party or get together and invite a few of your coworkers including the girl you like. Go out to a bar, throw a house party, whatever. Then make a move on her there, not at work. She's more likely to be open to it in a different environment, and it will be easier for you too.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/18 12:19 PM
1

Social security.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 08:43 PM
6

How can you not understand it if you admit that men feel the same way? Can you explain why it doesn't make you happy to know that random men who aren't you are getting on demand ribeyes and BJs?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:41 AM
5

All are welcome who are willing to pledge undying devotion to our High Priestess.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:40 AM
6

It would be like if I made a thread saying,"Men, how does it feel knowing that women will be your sexual goddess, cook you a four course dinner every night and be at your beck and call for whatever you need?" "No woman has ever done that for me." "Yeah, but they do it for some men! And you're a man! Doesn't that feel good?!?!" That's not what it's saying at all. To a smaller scale there are women that'll cook for men. There are women that help men when they are sick, there are women that do thes…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:36 AM
6

Yes. Why would it specifically help all women? Men don't fight wars for all women. Kings don't build empires for all women. ...that's exactly the point the women in this thread are saying. Why would we feel grateful or good about something men are doing for women who aren't us? Why would we ever even think about it? Right. And not all women are raped/sexually abused either. But women still support and those women and relate to them. You have a point here. But I think men are the same. I could ju…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:32 AM
9

Your empire would be beneficial to the women in your life. Presumably you aren't using your wealth to provide for random women you don't know. None of the women in this thread are saying we don't benefit from the men in our lives. But we don't directly benefit from men starting wars or building businesses or whatever else if we're not married or related to those men. It would be like if I made a thread saying,"Men, how does it feel knowing that women will be your sexual goddess, cook you a four …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:19 AM
12

You literally used the phrase "personally, how does it feel" in your title and are telling people not to make it personal or about "feelz." I'm not even sure what your question is if you remove the personal feelings aspect of it. Do you just want to know if women acknowledge that men do all these things for them?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 11:39 PM
3

Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 11:37 PM
1

It was Karlie Kloss, but yeah. There have been rumors (and some pretty convincing evidence) about her playing for the other team going back to like 2007. At this point I feel like there's gotta be something to it. I'm out of the loop on the Jay-Z thing -- what's going around about him?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 11:34 PM
1

OMG, Crazy Days and Nights is a huuuuuge guilty pleasure of mine. I love that garbage. As a big Taylor Swift fan, I'm dying to know if the stuff he's written about her over the years is true. Also I've never seen that Twitter before. Thanks for giving me another celebrity gossip rabbit hole to go down...
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 10:56 PM
8

Yes, men do like men. Very much so. Freudian slip?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 10:44 PM
12

I don't think I, personally, am the cause of all that, and I don't really get validation from things "women" as a group accomplish. So it doesn't make me feel much.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 10:43 PM
2

I can't remember the last time. I'm pretty much a shut-in these days, and I work in an office full of women, so the opportunity doesn't come up much. But I did it all the time in college and in my early twenties, especially when I was waiting tables.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 07:37 PM
2

Oh cool, I'll have to check it out. I got really into the Jim Jones thing a couple years ago and read/watched everything about it I could get my hands on.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 04:23 PM
3

That's on my queue to watch. I love cult stuff too.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 04:17 PM
2

Do you mean losing your job? If so, I've been through that. It was pretty stressful. But I mean, if I were a SAHW, my husband could lose his job and that would be stressful too. Even more so since we wouldn't have a second income to fall back on. There's no such thing as a stress free life. I'm not saying the workforce isn't stressful at all. But most women throughout human history have had to deal with much harsher conditions and more stressful circumstances than anything you'll find in the mod…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 11:37 PM
3

You quoted one of the definitions in that article. The most prominent definition in the article is this one: The working class (also labouring class and proletariat) are the people employed for wages, especially in manual-labour occupations and industrial work.[1] Working-class occupations include blue-collar jobs, some white-collar jobs, and most pink-collar jobs. The working class only rely upon their earnings from wage labour, thereby, the category includes most of the working population of i…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 08:08 PM
5

Well I consider the working class the middle class. Good for you, but when discussing the demographics in the United States they are two distinct groups. Marxist and socialist definitions aren't really relevant to US politics or demography. When people talk about the "white working class," they mean non-college educated blue collar workers. I think everyone is generally supportive and encouraging of their children to be productive members of society, as a whole. Sure, but their definition of "pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 08:00 PM
5

You said working class but then linked to the Wikipedia for middle class. Those are two separate things. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Working_class What you are saying is correct about the middle class. Not so much with the working class, as a general rule.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 07:41 PM
1

Sure, I was being reductive. The point is that for most people who suffer from anxiety, it's something that's more or less a part of them, whether it's inherited or due to environmental factors or a combination of the two. It's not typically a result of "stress" from one particular thing in their life, like their job. Work stress might cause people to be anxious, but that's different from actually suffering from an anxiety disorder.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 06:56 PM
2

Yeah, rereading it I think I did make a lot of assumptions that aren't really justified. I think I interpreted it as they got in a fight when he told her about his feelings for her, but you're right, he never actually says what the fight is about. Either way though, if continuing the friendship is causing emotional distress for him due to his feelings for her, I think it's best that he cut it off. Doesn't mean it's her fault, sometimes those things just happen. But you're right, I was too quick …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 06:47 PM
3

My reading of the story is that she's kind of using him and didn't really show any appreciation toward him until he told her he didn't want to be friends anymore. Then she unloaded a big guilt trip on him all at once. Of course I could be way off, and we only have one side of the story.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 06:39 PM
3

Yep. I credit my parents a lot for my coping strategies, because they never gave me the option of caving to my anxiety. "Oh, you're too shy and nervous to order for yourself at a restaurant? Guess you won't be eating then." They never coddled me or allowed my shyness and anxiety to become some immovable part of my identity. I learned early on how to work through it. It's just like any other handicap. It might slow you down, or you might have to do things differently than other people. But it onl…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 06:37 PM
4

It also doesn't mean your anxiety disorder is CAUSED by your career or life circumstances. People don't seem to understand that a lot of diagnosed mental illnesses aren't caused by anything but genetics and brain chemistry. I suffer from anxiety too, and have since I was a literal tiny child. It's not because my life is soooooo stressful. Stress can certainly exacerbate my anxiety, but it's not what causes it. It's just how my brain is wired, and it runs in my family (both the men and the women.…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 06:20 PM
8

Yes, I'm under so much stress in my cushioned chair in my air-conditioned office eating my microwaved lunch. Life was so much easier when traditional ladies like my great-grandmother were out in the fields picking cotton with babies on their backs in 100 degree heat. The idea that women are under more stress now than they were in the past is laughable. We just have more time to navel gaze and write thinkpieces and fill out sociological surveys about how stressed and anxious we are. Women (and me…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 06:13 PM
6

In the past, when my goal was getting into an LTR and eventually getting married, my biggest problem was being too needy and getting too attached too quickly. At best, guys found it annoying; at worst, it freaked them out and they ghosted or dumped me. Now that I'm married, my biggest problem is that I don't assert my needs or grievances. When something is bothering me, I hide it to the point where it just festers inside and slowly turns to resentment. Eventually it comes out in a way that's les…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 02:56 PM
2

Oh I see. Then maybe just briefly explain to her why you're cutting off contact. "I'm not angry, but this friendship is taking too much out of me right now and I need to focus on other things. I wish you the best."
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 02:47 PM
4

Honestly, she sounds like dead weight and not a very good friend. If you feel like you said your piece, I wouldn't respond to her email. You're not obligated to her and you've already explained that you don't want her in your life anymore and why. It sucks and it's no one's fault, these things happen. She'll get over it in time. If you do feel like you should respond, I would just tell her while you have appreciated her friendship and understand this is difficult for her, you need to focus your …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 02:34 PM
5

He doesn't need to take me out on dates or anything, but I'd need to know him for at least a couple weeks before I'd be comfortable with having sex. Sex with a stranger was never remotely appealing to me. I'd also probably need to know there was at least a chance that it could lead to something more. If those two conditions weren't met, I'd just as soon make out with him for a bit. When I was 21 or so I actually had a chance to sleep with a guy who was my literal physical ideal, though I'm not s…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 01:22 AM
4

Your gif game is always so on point.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 01:15 AM
4

😂
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 08:22 PM
2

No, never did online dating. I haven't been single since 2012 and that's before OKC and Tinder really blew up, at least where I lived. Plus I had an active social life and was always meeting new people, so why would I need online dating? Edit: Actually, my most recent ex is a bit of an odd story. We did "meet" online (not on a dating site) and chatted online for a while, but when we met in person it was in professional meetup group (we were both teachers.) We met in that setting several times be…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 04:51 PM
3

There are several scenes like this in Westworld (the series), where a female employee of the park will marvel at the more well-endowed hosts. There's also a scene where a prostitute says she let a client walk out on his bill because "The way he was using that thing, I should have been paying him!"
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 04:49 PM
4

Yeah I think you're right.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 03:21 AM
6

Yep. I knew my husband for a year before we started dating (he had an on-again-off-again girlfriend during that time, and we got to know each other as friends.) The guy before that I met through professional networking and knew for a few months before we went out. I met my college boyfriend through a club at school and knew him for a semester or so before we started dating. I never experienced this "first date with a virtual stranger" thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 02:04 AM
2

Not true. People start pairing off and marrying rapidly in their mid twenties to early thirties. I'm 29 and I literally know NO single guys. None. They're all married, engaged or in cohabitating LTRs. Not that I'm looking, but if I were it would not be as easy to find someone as it would have been 5-10 years ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 10:16 PM
1

Lol, right.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 01:57 PM
2

Understandable. I usually regret giving people here the benefit of the doubt, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 01:46 AM
3

Yep.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 01:44 AM
5

Reading it generously, I think maybe he just wanted a way to "bookmark" the thread so he could remember to come back to it later? Like maybe he goes to his own post history and sees which threads he's commented in so he knows which ones to revisit? idk. Either way it does seem a little odd.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 01:32 AM
1

u wot m8
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 01:09 AM
2

PREACH my friend. I have been harping on this for so long! My husband and I danced the cumbia the night we met and I was instantly smitten with him. The guy I dated before him was an amateur competitive swing dancer. It's such an underrated skill. I can't think of anything more sexual (besides actual sex) than dancing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 12:40 AM
4

A guy working with his body is the most masculine thing there is. It's viscerally attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 11:35 PM
3

I can't even answer this because both are absolutely necessary. I also don't think a man can really love a woman without desiring her sexually. Desire can certainly exist without love, but I don't think the opposite is true except maybe in old age.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 11:28 PM
3

I agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 11:26 PM
2

Oh yeah, this is a big one for me too.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 10:53 PM
2

THIS. I don't need someone to like the stuff I like, but constantly shitting on my tastes gets old really fast. I'm particularly emotionally attached to the music I listen to, so when someone tries to diminish it or tell me that it sucks that's very upsetting for me. Let people like what they like!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 10:23 PM
1

For the most part I don't really care what his hobbies are, and I like to have hobbies that are just mine so I actually prefer him to have different hobbies and interests. The only exception is a hobby that I can't really do alone; then I would prefer he be interested in those things too. For me, that's dancing and the outdoors. I grew up hiking, camping, fishing, etc. and I love to do those things and want to do those things with my kids, so it's pretty essential for me to have a partner who li…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 10:21 PM
6

Heart problems can also literally cause anxiety, not because you're worried about your health necessarily but because of the physiological affect of your heart rhythm, blood pressure etc. on the rest of your body. My oldest brother has suffered from debilitating anxiety his whole life, and a few years ago in his late 30s was diagnosed with a heart defect that had gone undetected since birth. He had a couple of surgeries, was put on some medication and got his heart rhythm and blood pressure unde…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 06:41 PM
10

A lot of the guys here have a very irrational kneejerk outrage response to seeing Jammerly's name. It's pretty funny.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 04:34 PM
3

My periodontist is a babe.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 03:33 PM
1

Yeah, but most people cohabitate for years before getting married. My husband and I lived together for five years and I know some couples who lived together for a decade or more. If you're taking it as a given that she's going to stop fucking you eventually anyway, I don't see why you wouldn't just let the LTR run its course instead of going through the rigmarole of marriage and divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 03:14 PM
1

It is absolutely 100% the norm for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 01:52 PM
1

Why even bother getting married? Why not just have LTRs and cohabitate?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 01:51 PM
9

Most of the time it's two different groups of women doing these things.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 01:33 PM
2

They're called musicians.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 11:17 PM
3

Ugh, friends who constantly complain about their SOs like that are the wrist worst. At some point it's like, either break up with him or STFU because I'm tired of listening to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 12:05 PM
4

I've always gotten along well with other women. Never experienced the "frenemy" dynamic or the backstabbing and cattiness that is supposedly so rampant in female circles. I've had the same two best friends since elementary school; they're like sisters to me. One of them ended up in the same city as I did, so we hang out pretty frequently. The other one is farther away and I don't get to see her much, but we visit each other when we can, and we've had an ongoing back-and-forth in email for the pa…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 11:17 AM
1

Right, that's what I meant and why I made the caveat that balanced might not be the right word. Basically, what I'm saying is that men are more likely than women to be polarized and have one clear dominant trait. I don't know that for sure but it makes sense to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 02:44 AM
3

No one's saying marriage can't mean more on an emotional level to the individuals involved; certainly, for most of us, it does. But the fact of the matter is, from a legal standpoint, it's a financial union. The law doesn't care what the marriage means emotionally; when it comes to the dissolution of a marriage, the law is concerned with the distribution of the products of the marriage (read: children and assets.) The law is what is being discussed here. OP is claiming that he and other men are …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 01:29 AM
2

It seems like in most respects, men are more polarized while women are more balanced (or more conflicted, depending on how you look at it.) Also, anecdotally and with a couple of exceptions, the female leaders I know are still concerned with appearances and being liked and all that "feelsy" stuff. That's rarely if ever true of male leaders. I also think a lot of women who struggle with love and dating possess high E and high T traits -- they want to take on the passive, feminine role in a relati…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 12:52 AM
2

Oh ok yeah, those would be antagonistic. Director was my lowest score, at 14%. I'm now wondering, when a Director/Negotiator combo does occur, if it's more often in men or women. My guess is the latter.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 12:20 AM
3

I'm not sure builder and negotiator are "highly antagonistic." Both are externally focused and concerned with one's place in the group. Builders value adherence to tradition and social mores, negotiators value harmony and mutual understanding. These seem like very compatible directives. Unless I'm misunderstanding something about one of these types. Also, like I said, they align pretty well with my MBTI type (ISFJ). My Si is always looking to the past, compelled to adhere to tradition and famili…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 12:09 AM
3

These are my results too. 74% builder 64% negotiator. These align with the dominant and auxiliary functions of my MBTI type too (Si and Fe, respectively.) I think we took this test for a team building thing at work last year. Or at least something very similar. I remember there being four categories, and I distinctly remember Builder being one of my results.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 11:36 PM
6

If you want my honest opinion, this weird New Age take on marriage being all about feefees is directly linked to raise in divorce rates. Understanding the economic and labor underpinnings of marriage, what you've vowed to create/protect, can actually help get a couple through some hard times. Preach. This is spot on.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 05:22 PM
1

Ok? The fact remains that most of those women "spreading their legs" and having kids out of wedlock are from the lower/working class. That's all I was commenting on.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 02:25 PM
1

It's a class thing. Single moms COME from the lower classes. Unless you're talking about divorced moms, but that's a separate issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 01:31 PM
5

Well, it could also be a clue as to what he has been up to in the past I suppose. It's definitely a jab at the guy more than his date, and it sounds like you would expect him to take offense at it. I mean it's literally saying he's not attractive enough to get a woman without paying for it. That's an insult to him, but it's an insult to me too. I don't want people telling me I have bad taste in men, and I take issue with anyone insulting someone I care about. Thanks for your candor. So it's deep…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 04:23 AM
9

See my response here. Being compared to a sex worker is not going to be interpreted as a compliment by a normal woman under any circumstances. Sex work is looked down on in our culture, even "classy" escorts, no matter how many PPD weirdos want to pretend that isn't so. I get how it could maybe be construed as a compliment (like, "You're so out of his league, there's no way he got a girl like you without paying for it!") But at the end of the day, it's AT BEST a backhanded compliment. Implying t…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 03:35 AM
2

Filming (non-amateur) porn is actually only legal in a few counties in the US. Just like prostitutes are legal in one county in Nevada. But, I agree it's quite a double standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 12:13 AM
3

117 comments and counting, but really this is all that needed to be said.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 10:16 PM
9

If he thought the girl was exceptionally beautiful, he's say that she looks like a model. At most he might assume that she has a sugar daddy if she's poor and now get to live in luxury. This. There are a million ways to compliment a girl or a million things/people to compare her to. Prostitute has a specific connotation, and calling someone one is not a compliment. I don't know if people are playing dumb ITT or if they really are this stupid.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 10:11 PM
13

So just because one type of prostitute looks a certian way they all do? I didn't say that. But when someone says that someone "looks like a prostitute," that's the look they have in mind. That's why I said this in my original comment: (inb4 "but muh high-end escorts" -- yeah, that's not what anyone means when they say "She looks like a prostitute," and we all know that.) Yes there are prostitutes that don't fit the street hooker stereotype. But that's what (normal, American) people think of when…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 08:57 PM
23

You know as well as I do that there is a specific look associated with street hookers.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 08:48 PM
19

Exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 06:39 PM
84

Prostitutes are not typically the upper echelon of attractiveness, class or style. (inb4 "but muh high-end escorts" -- yeah, that's not what anyone means when they say "She looks like a prostitute," and we all know that.) Someone saying you look like a prostitute implies that you're trashy and low rent, not attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 06:32 PM
1

SPOILER OMG YES. I literally leaned over to my husband and said this exact thing. I think that was the point where I was taken out of the movie and started to be critical of it. There were a million things he could have done in that moment to at least attempt to save himself and the kids. Stupid.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 02:50 PM
2

It felt like a horror movie for people who don’t like horror. Lol, that probably explains why I enjoyed it. Although after I watched it, when I thought more about it, there were a lot of things that bothered me (and I agree with you that getting pregnant was stuuuuupid.) But I found it entertaining enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 01:10 PM
7

Where does TBP comment on how long women's hair should be?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/18 03:40 PM
2

Pregnant women typically go to the doctor early on. Certainly at some point within the abortion window. This is all hypothetical anyway, there are tons of reasons nothing like this will ever be implemented. I was just saying that would be a pretty easy way to prove she knew and didn't tell him.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/18 02:40 PM
1

This is a spin-off of a thread that was a spin-off of a thread that asked this exact question.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/18 01:29 PM
2

If she had had doctors appointments, etc. several weeks before telling him, that would show she was withholding the information from him and would be very easy to prove.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/18 01:15 PM
1

Aww I'm sorry.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/18 02:53 AM
2

I think maybe the effect is more exaggerated these days because of social media. In the past you could just move on; now you have to log on to Facebook or Instagram and see the object of your affection having the time of their life without you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/18 07:49 PM
1

Between this and the Dickbit I really think you guys should set up a Kickstarter.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/18 01:07 AM
4

I mean, by what defintion is this woman a slut? She might not be making great decisions if she's fucking "badboy douches" (although that's just speculation on your part), but certainly keeping the same few guys in rotation is less slutty than fucking a new random every weekend. Is is the KIND of men she fucks that makes her a slut, rather than the NUMBER of men?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/18 09:53 PM
3

That makes sense. I would think extended FWB situations or at least hooking up with the same person a few times would lend itself more to experimentation and more varied experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/18 08:58 PM
6

I think it would depend on the nature and length of those sexual relationships. Most people aren't going to get too adventurous with a ONS. I wouldn't expect a person who's had 50 one-off hookups to have that many novel experiences under their belt.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/18 08:46 PM
8

Cut them open and count the rings.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/18 08:32 PM
5

Good analysis.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/18 02:06 AM
3

Ain't that the truth.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/18 01:27 AM
7

Maybe we could avoid these miscommunications if people used the word forego instead of sacrifice. e.g. "By choosing to take time off to have children,a woman will forego a higher earning potential." That seems like a less loaded statement.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 11:11 PM
0

John Mulaney is my husband and my favorite. We saw his live show a couple months ago, so so good.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 06:15 PM
12

Do you think maybe your female friends have conversations with each other when you are not around? These kinds of things generally aren't said in mixed company.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 05:56 PM
4

Yes it's a very stupid word.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 03:53 PM
40

They do, all the time. The feminist movement is full of woker-than-thou infighting. They just probably aren't policing each other over the things you think they should be. (Although, if you think women don't tell each other to dump shitty men idk what to tell you.)
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 03:47 PM
3

Medicare is for the elderly and comes out of federal taxes. It works like social security; you pay into it while you're employed and start collecting at 65. Medicaid is medical assistance for low-income people of all ages and comes out of both federal and state taxes.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 03:35 AM
4

Medicare taxes are taken out of your paycheck.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 02:48 AM
3

Okie dokie.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 02:02 AM
12

If you think feminists don't criticize misogynist messages in music and other pop culture you haven't been paying attention. They probably don't do it on the blue pill sub because that's not what that sub is for.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/18 01:43 AM
6

If I like a guy, I won't directly approach, but I'll find a way to get in his proximity and make sure he notices me. At that point, if he doesn't initiate anything, it's for one of three reasons: He's not interested He's too timid/shy/passive to make the first move. He's not socially adept enough to pick up on my cues. 1 is an obvious no-go. And 2 or 3 aren't guys I would have fun hanging out with, and aren't likely to take me where I need to go attraction-wise, so there's no use in going out of…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 06:11 PM
6

I hang around people covered in tattoos just like that guy. They're all hipsters with office jobs, or servers/bartenders. Those aren't "bad boy" tattoos.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 03:23 PM
2

None of these guys have the kind of complexion/coloring I like which is probably the #1 thing that gets my attention, so I'm not particularly attracted to any of them. #1 is closest to my type. I think they'd all be attractive to their respective demographics (young hipsters for #1, professionals for #2, fitness girls for #3.)
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 03:20 PM
5

I'd feel some combination of flattered, uncomfortable and embarrassed because that's just kind of how I react to that sort of thing. I'd tell him I'm married (or, in a hypothetical where I'm not married, that I'm not looking to date right now.) I'd say thanks and have a good night, and find an excuse to leave his presence (go to the restroom, start talking to friends etc.) to avoid further awkwardness. I was always really bad at rejecting people and felt bad about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 05:15 AM
2

I think people on Reddit think all kids are toddlers or something. 9 is plenty old enough to learn how to use a knife and do so responsibly. Hell I was shooting guns by that age.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/18 09:35 PM
3

That's a great analogy.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/18 02:12 AM
3

Sometimes I read things like this and wonder what people on the internet think therapy is.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/18 01:53 AM
3

Yeah you can become an LVN or RN without a bachelor's degree.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/18 12:19 AM
2

Most of those people work those stem jobs live in places where a two bedroom condo will cost 800k too. Ever watch hgtv and think "wtf! For that little thing!" Lol yeah exactly. I live in Austin and while it's not as bad as that, the cost of living is high here compared to the rest of the state (which is why my husband and I plan to move in the next year.) If you want a halfway decent home here you're looking at 400K bare minimum, and that's before the ass-rapingly high property taxes. In the par…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 09:43 PM
2

I think a lot of times they get the girlfriend and then get fat. (Disclaimer before anyone yells at me: yes women do this too.) Although I do know some very charismatic fat guys who got attractive gfs. I dated one.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 09:31 PM
5

Leave 22-year-old me out of this.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 09:16 PM
5

It really depends on the state and district. I started out at 37K in one of the highest paying districts in my state; most districts start around 32K. I make ~50K now, but I work in higher ed now and have a masters degree. If I were still in the K12 classroom I'd probably be making around 40K. Most teachers in my state, if they don't coach or go into administration, will max out around 65-75K. Which isn't making bank but it's nothing to sneeze at either, especially in the south or midwest like y…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 09:11 PM
4

I never said it was "poverty." And I agree it's a good living especially when you factor in benefits and such. It's just usually one of the first jobs people bring up when they talk about women choosing fields that don't pay well.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 08:58 PM
7

I'd also add that someone isn't necessarily a failure because they didn't land a job "in their field" (and no, I'm not talking about going to work at Starbucks or whatever.) I used to work in marketing, and very few of my colleagues actually had marketing degrees. A bunch of us were English majors, film majors, theatre majors etc. Liberal arts degrees can be leveraged for all different kinds of work, if you do your due diligence networking in college and are lucky enough to have an internship or…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 06:46 PM
3

Ah I see, that makes a lot of sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 06:34 PM
6

Haha, yeah, that's polar opposite from where I grew up. Most of the guys go into the oil field or farming (if they came from a farming family), or go into law enforcement or the military. The girls might go to community college for something like nursing, cosmetology or radiology. If not, they'd go to work as a secretary, nursing home staff, childcare etc. Or even something like retail/waitressing. (I'm of course not counting all those that went on to pursue a career in the lucrative methampheta…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 06:24 PM
8

Yeah, and I'm saying "women" don't do that, women of a certain class do that because they can afford to. None of the women I grew up around (except the ones born into money, like the friend I mentioned) pursued "passion projects," and they certainly weren't wasting money on college for something that wasn't going to get them a job afterward. Because they knew there wasn't a chance in hell they'd marry a man who could bankroll such a lifestyle. Most women never even entertain the idea that they c…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 06:00 PM
1

Yep. That's exactly why my mom works where she does -- good insurance for employees and spouses/families. My dad isn't a farmer (his dad and grandfather were, and he had NO interest in carrying on that tradition), but he was mostly self-employed through the years, so my mom had to work for benefits. My brother married his wife for largely the same reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 04:02 PM
14

This exactly. I went to school to be a teacher, a notoriously low-paying job. It wasn't because I thought, "Well, I'll be a teacher because it's muh passion and it doesn't matter anyway because a man will be able to support me." I did it because it's a decent career with benefits and job security and it made sense for someone like me, coming from a working class family where no one had ever gone to college before. It's not like I could have been an engineer or a doctor and chose not to because "…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 03:57 PM
1

Gotcha, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 03:39 PM
1

Lol. I grew up in the TX panhandle. Cotton farming is a major industry there but it's also a huge gamble because the weather is so volatile. The good years are VERY good. The bad years when there's a drought or the crops get hailed out, the farmers end up losing money, and their families live on the wife's salary (usually teaching, nursing or admin work.)
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 12:47 PM
1

It's probably very obvious but I'm dumb with acronyms - what's SOI?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 11:44 AM
1

Replace dairy with cotton and that's my hometown.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 11:41 AM
1

Attaboy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 11:41 AM
1

I think liking them is kind of implied in the word "friends" but what do I know. What you just described is something any introvert with extroverted friends can relate to. Every social circle I've ever been a part of had it's outgoing, gregarious party animals and its wallflowers who liked to sit off and observe. I won't tell you how to feel, but if you find it creepy you must have a very low creep threshold.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 11:34 AM
2

How on Earth is it creepy?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 02:35 AM
1

He's saying that slutty wealthy women fit these criteria. Not all wealthy women.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/18 02:33 AM
2

Yeah good point, that's probably the closest analogy.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:45 PM
2

You just contradicted yourself. If you don't understand how women like it then you can't conceive of sex that's physically unpleasant or neutral but emotionally rewarding.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:38 PM
2

Lol yeah, this is our social life these days too. Next weekend we are going over to your couple friends' apartment to check out their sous vide! Wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:35 PM
2

Great minds! (Or just minds who know what they're talking about.)
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:23 PM
3

Have you ever had sex that was emotionally but not physically pleasurable? I truly don't think men can conceive of this.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:22 PM
1

For women they are often very separate things. Sex can literally feel like nothing physically but still be emotionally engaging/rewarding. Ideally and often enough they happen simultaneously, but they are not that intertwined for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:20 PM
3

Lol yeah, pretty much this.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 07:32 PM
1

No. This spans throughout all realms of my life including the nonsexual. I just don't have an active imagination or find myself daydreaming very often.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 05:17 PM
1

Sometimes. Usually it's reminiscing on encounters I've had before. I don't have a very active imagination or have "fantasies" very often.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 05:03 PM
1

I would try an exhaustive review of all the known methods that have been used in the last 150 years, to find the ones that produced the best outcomes. What methods are you talking about? As far as I know, "marriage insurance" isn't something that has existed anywhere, ever. It would make sense to begin with some very different methods being used simulataneously, so that we can tell what works better. OK, but WHAT METHODS? Can you give me an example? I'm looking for specifics. I get that you want…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 03:11 PM
1

OK. What would you try first? I'm just curious. Also, can you address my last paragraph? I don't think marriage insurance is going to do much for the societal ills caused by divorce (which by and large aren't financial.) Unless maybe we use that money for therapy for children of divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 03:07 PM
1

I get that it's to take care of the kids, but what is the mechanism for that exactly? When I get sick or injured, my health insurance goes to the hospital to pay for my treatment. When I wreck my car, my car insurance sends a check to the bank to pay off my car, or to the shop to get it repaired. So the marriage insurance would go... directly to the kids? To the parents, who we just trust to spend it on the kids? To some institution that oversees and allocates the money? How would that work exac…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 03:02 PM
1

What would the insurance cover? Like, say you take out a marriage insurance policy, your marriage ends, so you get a payout. Where is that money intended to go?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 02:26 PM
2

It's interesting that you mention the smartphone thing; I was just about to bring that up. I taught high school from 2011-2014, and I couldn't help but notice during that time that the pecking order wasn't so much about clothes like when I was in school (though there was definitely still some of that), but about tech. Kids didn't seem too concerned with what each other were wearing, but God help you if you pulled an old Android or Blackberry out of your pocket instead of the latest iPhone. (And …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 01:34 PM
1

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 12:18 PM
3

I had friends (a pair of sisters) in college whose parents did this. Except it was after like 15 years. Pretty wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 12:05 AM
12

Best answer, we can all go home.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 10:57 PM
2

pours one out
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 10:49 PM
7

Female, blue pill, married. I'm going to nitpick and say I don't like the word "purpose" because it's loaded with a bunch of quasi-religious "predestiny" connotations that I don't believe in or relate to. I don't believe I'm here on this earth for any particular reason; I don't think there's a "purpose" or a "point" to my life or anyone else's. My goals for the life that I have are to surround myself with people I love, to be a good wife/daughter/sister/mother/friend, to keep learning things and…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 10:24 PM
4

I've never seen either scenario play out personally. I have, twice. In both cases the divorce was initiated by the woman because the man was cheating on her with an ex.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 10:07 PM
2

Yeah he was a cutie with a beard in a cubicle iirc
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 09:13 PM
2

Yeah you're probably right that it's semantics more than anything. I see what you mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 06:15 PM
3

It's just hard for me to think in terms of "love more" or "love less." When I'm in love, I love with all I have and I've done that with every single partner I've had. I'm more committed to my husband; I love him more deeply and maturely because I'm older and we've shared much much more together than I've ever shared with another partner, but I think that's a function of age and our commitment and the amount of time we've spent together, more than me simply "loving him more." I loved my college b…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 06:00 PM
3

Well you were one of the more put together men in that pic thread so I'm not surprised!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 04:37 PM
9

Excellent comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 12:38 PM
4

This exactly. How do you even compare something like that?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 12:37 PM
4

Short sleeves are generally not recommended. Long sleeves rolled up look better. Yes, this is what my husband does. Looks good and accentuates the forearms.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 12:27 PM
8

I'm not sure but I think it starts with steering away from 3-in-one shampoo/conditioner/body wash.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 12:25 PM
1

OK, that's pretty much what I thought. Thanks for the info.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/18 08:10 PM
1

Right, I didn't word that very well. What I mean is that "penis entering vagina" wouldn't necessarily rule out female-on-male rape, and where it does, female victims would be just as affected as male victims. Anyway I'm just nitpicking, IANAL.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/18 07:48 PM
2

The wording specified that penis had to enter vagina. Isn't female-on-male rape still "penis entering vagina"?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/18 07:41 PM
4

they banned me for saying bitch. Hey me too!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/18 12:39 PM
1

I'd rather ban the people who can't read.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 11:31 PM
3

Yeah, this is true IME.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 09:54 PM
6

Will do. I have one person specifically in mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 05:46 PM
12

I would add: ban everyone who does nothing but call other posters liars.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 05:43 PM
4

Where is feminism leading the charge against gossiping (say) with the admonision that (as with toxic masculinity) the solution is to be more like the other sex ? To drop the toxic femininity and be more masculine, as they tell us to drop the masculinity and be more feminine ? https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/putting-an-end-to-shaming-and-criticizing-other-women_us_587534d0e4b08052400ee69c https://www.theodysseyonline.com/women-support-women?utm_expid=.53hHQ_sIS_GVYl9TPM4psw.0&utm_referrer=ht…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 05:38 PM
3

Yes ma'am :)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 05:08 PM
3

Yeah, I mean if you literally don't know or have a preference then that's fine. But I do think it's polite to ask. Just like my husband will ask me which cologne I would prefer he wear.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 04:57 PM
2

Fair enough. That's not the typical perspective but it seems like you're aware of that.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 04:46 PM
4

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 04:42 PM
6

Aw thanks buddy.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 04:33 PM
3

Makes sense, thanks for explaining. And yeah, while generalizations can be annoying at times, I don't think they count as "attacks" and I think the sub would suffer if comments like that were removed. Discussing generalizations of certain demographics is kind of the entire point of this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 04:17 PM
5

Yeah I don't understand why this is "toxic." It's not because she literally can't make that decision herself, it's that she doesn't want to choose a cut that's unattractive to him.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 03:56 PM
3

Gotcha.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 03:55 PM
4

With all due respect to hyperrreal, why does his opinion matter if he's no longer going to be moderating the sub?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 03:52 PM
3

Or the sub that shall not be named...
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 03:44 PM
2

Get ready to go on a feelz trip!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 01:08 AM
1

He kind of stealth dropped it at midnight Friday.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 11:59 PM
2

Nice! Good job!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 09:52 PM
1

His new EP is so good.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 09:51 PM
6

This guy literally believes women don't like sex. Best not to engage.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 02:30 PM
3

Every FWB I had eventually turned into a boyfriend, and one eventually turned into a husband. So it worked ok for me. It's not for everyone I guess, and it doesn't always work out as well as it did for me. But it also seems like FWB/hookups are kind of the starting place for relationships these days for people in my age cohort. So I think it will probably be challenging if a person wants to avoid any sort of sex outside of a committed relationship, but if that's what they want to do, I certainly…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 02:24 AM
2

Maybe this will be something we change once the full announcement is out. Out of curiosity, when is that going to be?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 11:28 PM
2

Where did I ever claim it was the "generic" neutral expression? I very clearly stated it is THEIR neutral expression (as in, women/people with RBF) not the universal neutral expression. I'm blocking you until you learn to read. Goddamn.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 11:00 PM
2

I think it’s their unconscious neutral expression. -you, literally one comment ago
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:55 PM
2

Then why did you say I'm "conflating" RBF with neutral expression when you agree with me that they're the same thing?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:49 PM
5

It makes me feel very annoyed, but I will try not to show it in my face, lest I ruin some poor man's day.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:48 PM
7

Resting bitch face IS neutral face for some people. That's what the "resting" part is meant to imply. That was the whole origination of the term, it's for women whose neutral RESTING expression looks "bitchy."
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:44 PM
3

My comment is about resting bitchface. I don't think [resting bitchface] is enough to make a man look at an otherwise attractive woman who happens to not be smiling at the moment and think SHE is ugly. But yes [resting bitch face] is obviously a less attractive expression than smiling. But it's not reasonable to expect people [with or without resting bitch face] to walk around smiling all the time, literally no one does that and we'd all look insane if we did. Hope that helps.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:41 PM
9

I don't think it's enough to make a man look at an otherwise attractive woman who happens to not be smiling at the moment and think SHE is ugly. But yes it's obviously a less attractive expression than smiling. But it's not reasonable to expect people to walk around smiling all the time, literally no one does that and we'd all look insane if we did.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:35 PM
12

As a woman with RBF, I can change my expression when I want to look attractive and welcoming. It really doesn't bother me if random strangers in line at the grocery store think I'm ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:28 PM
7

It's really not.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:25 PM
1

Why is everyone assuming I'm talking about talent and not charisma/"X factor"?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 12:45 AM
6

I'm not talking about talent. I'm talking about charisma, stage presence etc. This is what gets people "noticed" even if they may be less talented than other people. Yes, luck factors into it too, I'm not denying that. But the thing that makes a label head want to sign a budding young popstar is the same thing women find attractive. "The powers that be" recognize those qualities in an artist before they're famous.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 06:53 PM
1

For the record I was just quoting Kanye West. I <3 Electra, old and new.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 06:36 PM
6

Straight from the go Electra Chop up the soul Electra Set on her goals Electra
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 04:42 PM
4

Oh my God, same. I die a little inside every time I see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 04:25 PM
14

I find it odd how people talk about "status" here like it is something that is just acquired, like it is a part of their personality or a possession, rather than something that is gained as a result of possession certain skills, having a certain personality etc. It's the same way they say "Women love rockstars because of their fame," without giving any consideration to why they acquired that fame in the first place. Fame just fell down upon them from on high.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 03:24 PM
2

No, that's Queer as Folk (which was also a great show.) Queer Eye is a reality-ish show where five gay guys give a straight dude a makeover.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 02:56 PM
1

I'm a lifelong Rangers fan, much to my Houston-born father-in-law's chagrin.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 01:43 PM
1

I just never really thought about it until I saw a Reddit thread about it. I always assumed they were just full of horny truckers.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 01:25 PM
2

I drive/navigate on road trips. He usually sleeps. For a couple years I was the primary (and at times sole) breadwinner while he was unemployed/going back to school. I do yard work, but I grew up in a family where that was the woman's job so it doesn't register as a "male gender role" to me. I didn't realize most people thought of it as such until coming to Reddit. Edit: Blue pill.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 01:23 PM
2

I would say this isn't "instead of" but "in addition to." Marketing is important, but you have to create a you worth marketing first.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 01:15 PM
2

I'm sure both will be deleted within 24 hours then we'll repeat the process all over again.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 01:12 PM
2

I recently learned that those sketched out "adult video store and arcades" are a big meeting place for gay dudes on the DL.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 01:07 PM
5

Yeah my bad, I took an hour to reply to a Reddit comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 11:05 PM
2

Ok, so if I understand you, you're asking if there are two guys exactly alike in looks, but one acts masculine and one acts "flamboyantly gay," which is likely to be more attractive? The masculine man in 99% of cases. However I don't think you can really draw a dichotomy like this because most of the time a flamboyant person is going to be flamboyant in more than personality. It's going to manifest in their looks, how they dress, how they carry themselves etc. Also, I don't think flamboyant nece…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 10:33 PM
2

I no longer ask him to kill spiders, since he decided that the best way to do that is to set them on fire. This is just correct tho
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 09:24 PM
3

watching SPORTS Chad detected. REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 09:10 PM
6

Can I just say I have been watching the new season of Queer Eye and Jonathan can get it
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 08:31 PM
9

Interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 08:23 PM
6

Again, consider clones of the same man. One acting masculine, while the other appearing flamboyantly feminine Again, why are you saying one is ACTING masculine while the other APPEARS feminine? That's not an apples-to-apples comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 08:23 PM
2

What does the romance stuff make you want to do? Or make you wish he would do? Makes me want to be in a relationship with him. Or if I'm already in a relationship with him, it makes me want to do nice things for him, buy him presents, show him nonsexual affection, give him words of affirmation, tell him I love him etc. In fact I'd say that the major difference between romantic and sexual attraction for me is that sexual attraction makes me want to be acted upon, whereas romantic attraction makes…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 08:21 PM
9

I find it weird that you're comparing/contrasting "acting" masculine with "appearing" feminine. These two things can go together, and when they do it's often a deadly combination. Think of Prince, Mick Jagger, '80s glam rockers etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 08:19 PM
2

Sexual attraction has to exist for there to be any romantic attraction at all. I've never been romantically attracted to someone I wasn't also sexually attracted to. So yes, I'd be open to fucking the guy, but it's because of the sexy stuff, not the romance stuff. The romantic stuff is what makes me want to do more than fuck him.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 08:14 PM
3

I do like me some full lips. My husband has very masculine features, his lips being the one exception -- they're very full and pillowy. It's nice. Actually, looking back, almost all the men I've dated have had fuller lips.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 07:59 PM
5

Physically, masculine men are tall, broad-shouldered, have thick body/facial hair, deep voices, narrow waists, deep-set eyes, square jaws, large hands/feet etc. Behaviorally, masculine men are dominant, aggressive, territorial, mechanically minded, goal oriented, willing to take risks, and take ownership of the things and people in their lives. The above behaviors can manifest in positive ways (hardworking, protective of loved ones) or negative ways (jealous, reckless, physically abusive.) My ta…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 07:12 PM
1

Well I've somehow managed to never encounter anything about "anime waifus" outside of the internet so I think I'll do okay avoiding the sex doll weirdos too. Btw check out the song Gameboy by Original God it’s wavey af I definitely will not be doing that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 06:38 PM
2

But isn't his voice part of his physical attractiveness? By physical I meant "looks." Voice is a combination of things -- timbre, pitch, accent, etc. It was just an example of something non-looks-based that can be attractive about a person. Would women find him attractive if he had that nice of a voice but didn't look like his mom and dad had him built by catalog? Please pay close attention to what I'm about to say. AT NO POINT DID I CLAIM OR WILL I EVER CLAIM THAT LOOKS AREN'T PART OF THE EQUAT…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 04:34 PM
3

And it's likely that in the process of that "normal conversation" the woman will be attracted to something more than his looks -- his voice, his body language, the way he makes eye contact etc. This is what I mean. Men would see this taking place and say "She fucked Ryan Gosling and he didn't even have to do anything but stand there!" They're not picking up on the millions of subtle cues he's putting off. It's likely she isn't even picking up on them consciously. This is how attraction works.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 04:23 PM
4

Why are you assuming Ryan Gosling doesn't DO anything sexy?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 04:21 PM
4

I think you (and several other people who have responded to me) are missing what I mean by "the right environment and energy." He doesn't have to do some grand romantic gesture to impress me. It doesn't have to be love letters and rose petals on the bed. It could literally just be the sound of his voice, the way he touches my arm while we're having a conversation, the way he dances, the way he flirts, his body language. I think men don't perceive these things in other men so they think women fuc…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 04:17 PM
2

Say what you want about Austin, but at least our shitty infrastructure ensures that traffic will be moving so slowly that shit like that doesn't happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 03:19 PM
2

OP literally reblogged a cat picture from a known TERF on August 16, 2013 but go off I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 03:16 PM
1

The first time I drove in Houston I had a panic attack and cried all the way from Katy to Kingwood.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 03:07 PM
1

Obviously that is extremely weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 01:12 PM
2

Anime waifus are "super common"?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 01:07 PM
2

Probably not. It just isn't in my nature to do that. I'd try to get his attention and put myself in his proximity but I wouldn't be that direct about it. Say, if he's talking to a group of people, I might make my way over and join in on that conversation. That way I know he noticed me, and if he doesn't take the initiative after that I can just assume he isn't interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 01:01 PM
1

He's full of shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 12:51 PM
1

Right.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 03:23 AM
3

Yeah, same. At some point it all becomes so interconnected that it's not useful (or really even possible) to distinguish between the two. I guess that's pretty much the ideal, that there's plenty of the lovey dovey stuff and the sexy stuff. You and I are living the dream :)
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 12:58 AM
3

Yeah I see what you mean. I've been thinking more about initial attraction I guess, like when you first meet someone. In a relationship I think there's less of a distinction because both contexts are established and (hopefully) constant -- the erotic and the affectionate. Like, aw, he did a nice thing for me, that was really sweet, I'm going to give him a kiss. Oh hey, while he was kissing me he grabbed my butt and now I'm thinking sexy thoughts. Ideally the affectionate/erotic dynamics are play…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 12:22 AM
7

Yeah, exactly. And while comfort traits don't inspire lust, I do think that the absence of them can erode lust/desire over time as the woman loses that closeness and connection with her partner. There's definitely a balance required.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 10:37 PM
1

How so?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 09:09 PM
5

Hmm. Perhaps they are the same for you. For me these are distinct categories. For one thing, the first would require some degree of familiarity with the person. I don't experience affection for strangers. But I can experience the second set of feelings for a stranger; that magnetic pull that makes me want to be in their presence and experience their vibe.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 08:13 PM
8

Participating on this sub has kind of turned me off to the concept of "romantic attraction" so that's why I didn't address it. But yes I think there's a difference. I think there are things our partners do that make us want to be around them and make us go "awwww" but don't necessarily make us sexually excited. So if that's what you're describing as 'romantic attraction" then yes it's distinct from sexual attraction. Affection is probably the word I would use. There are also things that make a p…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 06:26 PM
20

Yes, this makes sense to me. I've noticed the conflation of attraction and arousal and I don't think it's accurate. I kind of agree with u/atlas_b_shruggin that women don't really even experience attraction to a man, at least in the way men think of "attraction." It's not a direct line between "attractive man" to "want to fuck." Female attraction is more about being open to fucking, provided the man creates the right energy/environment. For me, if I see an attractive man, I don't think "I want t…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 06:07 PM
2

I think the problem is that she was engaged and still sending nudes to other men. Although that commenter does seem weirdly fixated on the "used selfies" aspect.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 05:32 PM
2

Yeah, agreed. There's a spectrum between "finely coiffed fitness enthusiast" and "ungroomed fat slob" and I tend to like guys who fall into that in-between space. My husband doesn't go to the gym but he runs and works a physical job so he's in good shape, just not what reddit people tend to picture when they think of "fitness." He doesn't have defined muscles or anything and he has some meat on his bones but that's fine with me (in fact it's what I prefer.)
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 05:15 PM
4

I have a weird bias against men who I perceive as putting a lot of effort into their appearance...not so much in terms of clothing, but more like overly coiffed hair and visibly muscled when you know he doesn't do manual labour. Yeah, I have this same thing. This type of guy comes off as try-hard and actually kind of feminine to me. It isn't attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 04:22 PM
4

Not very sex positive of him.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 03:42 PM
3

We have similar types :)
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 02:57 PM
7

It's just deeply unsettling to me and implies a level of weirdness that seeing prostitutes doesn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 01:26 PM
6

Prostitutes. But as always I'd prefer he keep his mouth shut and not blab to me about it like a weirdo. In reality though both would likely be a deal breaker. But I'd be more grossed out by the doll.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 12:46 PM
10

Finally an important question on this sub
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/18 10:35 PM
8

That's the spirit!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/18 10:35 PM
5

Sex should be illegal.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/18 06:36 PM
1

They didn't like him because he wasn't attractive. Now he is, and the attractive version is just as much "him" as the old version was.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/18 02:43 PM
2

The Beatles - Run For Your Life I can't BELIEVE I forgot this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 10:34 PM
2

Yeah, tons of folk songs in that vein. I didn't include them because I figured people would argue that "things were different back then, you could NEVER make a song like that now!" So I stuck with more modern stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 03:35 PM
8

Songs in which men hurt, kill or otherwise get revenge on women who did them wrong, and are portrayed as the protagonist for doing so: One Two Three Four (O hai) Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Food for thought.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 03:30 PM
1

Hahahahaha goddamn
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 04:31 AM
1

I don't know who Nancy Friday is.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 03:18 AM
2

Elaine Benes, is that you?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 02:15 AM
2

Newp. Oh well. Still impressive they made it this far -- first time in history.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 01:09 AM
3

My mom, dad and I saw Dwight Yoakam on Friday night. He's been a favorite of my parents' forever and I grew up on his music. Such a good show! I was really impressed with his band, especially the guy who switched between keyboards, pedal steel, fiddle, mandolin and accordion -- sometimes all in one song. Also, I'm not a big basketball fan or anything, but the Texas Tech alum in my life is very excited so I am too. Go Red Raiders!
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/18 06:28 PM
6

1) Q4W: Have you ever tried using enhancement pills or topical creams, and if so what was your mental reaction? Was it in sync with your physical reaction? I've never used these products; in fact, I never heard of them before this thread. 2) Q4W: Do you personally have a reactive libido (it requires a stimulus from your sex partner) or an active libido (you are horny without need for external stimulus)? Mostly reactive. I get spontaneously horny once in a blue moon, but normally I need to be put…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/18 02:34 PM
10

Children and legacy have always been the purpose of marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/18 12:37 AM
2

I took the SAT, ACT and GRE and I have no clue what I made on any of those tests. It's just not something that mattered after I got into college/grad school so I promptly forgot that information. Who cares?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 11:55 PM
1

Ok I see. I can actually relate to that. I wish I could give you some actionable advice but I'm not sure I can. I struggle with this myself at times. Ultimately it's a self esteem issue. You have to believe you deserve good things. You're not quite used to the new "you," it feels like a facade because you spent so many years with the old "you.", The more comfortable you get in your own skin the less you will feel like an imposter. It's not a new you, just a changed you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 11:06 PM
25

Isn't the tall, attractive med student "you"? If she loves you for those things how is she not loving you for you? Why do you identify more with your high school self than your current self?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 09:35 PM
2

Have fun!!!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 02:31 PM
7

One of my aunts was a knockout when she was young, and according to my mom, was the "it girl" at their high school -- a pretty, petite cheerleader with a steady stream of boyfriends and a clan of BFFs. Even now (she just turned 60), she has an active social life, plenty of friends and hobbies, and is still relatively pretty and fit for her age. She has a bubbly, fun personality and is generally a hoot to be around. She married young and then divorced a few years later. I don't really know the st…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 02:27 PM
3

My mom tried to get me into dance and I REFUSED. Chose to play basketball instead. To this day it's one of the biggest regrets of my life. Growing up in Texas in a musical family, I learned to waltz and two step from a young age. I love to go out dancing and I'm decent at it. But I really wish I had taken the opportunity to have some formal training when I was young.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 03:48 AM
8

Honestly I think it's the influx of foreigners into certain kinds of engineering. I partied with engineering students in college. My friend's frat bro boyfriend (now husband) was a civil engineering student and there were electrical, chemical and petroleum engineering students in our group too. They were just normal guys. I'm sure they worked hard and studied a lot too, but they managed to have a social life and drink and have sex like everybody else.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 10:43 PM
10

It’s less pre selection and more other women see what I see. Yep.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 09:55 PM
4

a lot of men (particularly RP men) are less attracted to women being needy as much as they are the idea of being needed. That's a really good distinction. Well said.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 07:04 PM
1

Ben Afflec was and is pretty cute. I love his character in Good Will Hunting, that's a guy I would like irl. Blonds aren't my thing at all so I'm not into the other two.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/18 05:12 PM
4

Carly Rae Jepsen (who sings Call Me Maybe) actually has a HUGE gay male following. I don't know if the video was made with that in mind (doubtful since it was her first big hit and she didn't really have a fan base to pander to at the time), but for whatever reason she seems to appeal to twenty-something queer hipsters more than the teenage normie girls who are the typical pop music consumers.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/18 06:17 AM
1

I'm late to this convo but I'd be interested in those studies if you have them handy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/18 02:23 AM
9

I've never even smoked a joint :|
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/18 12:06 AM
16

Or talking to your hs-aged daughter about her "virtue."
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 11:32 PM
1

Hahaha, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 02:11 PM
3

My endo sista.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 12:38 AM
4

I'm sure there are some but it's not a female impulse generally speaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 12:30 AM
9

Because they're men. Men tend to objectify individual body parts more than women do. For straight men, it's tits and ass. For gay men, it's dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 12:08 AM
7

http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/155/834/plz-stop-post.jpg
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:09 PM
1

What I don't get is you calling atheists "pretentious" and "ignorant", because they're not versed in biblical text. No, I'm calling certain atheists pretentious and ignorant for thinking they have a leg to stand on to debate religion when they don't even understand its premises on an intellectual level and don't care to learn. Not being versed in the text is fine. It's when people who aren't versed in the text think they're qualified to question religious people on those premises without even un…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 07:10 PM
1

It's terrifying! I'm going out of town for a conference tomorrow and I'll be glad to be out of here for a few days. I had bad dreams about it last night :( I'm watching a press conference right now and apparently they're asking people in the neighborhood from last night's bombing to stay inside until 2pm. Originally they were saying just until 10am. Hopefully that means they've found some promising evidence they need to investigate further. I want this person (or people) to get caught!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 03:37 PM
3

There's a bomber on the loose in my city and last night a bomb exploded right near my husband's work. Very cool. Not at all terrifying.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 03:15 PM
1

You need to reread my comment if you think my gripe is with people who don't believe in Christianity.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 01:54 PM
1

Ugh yeah, I'm sure that's very frustrating.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 11:08 PM
2

Totally. I think that's kind of why it bothers me, because even if you don't believe, having an understanding of the Bible and how biblical principles have influenced morality, law, art, culture, etc. etc. is integral to a fully-formed understanding of western history. So to dig in your heels and insist religion is just a bunch of frivolous fairy tales is a special kind of willful ignorance, imo. But yeah... I know the types you're talking about and am friends with several myself. It's exhaustin…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 06:56 PM
5

plus, it will get under the skin of the few pretentiously anti-religion people i know. This is pretty rewarding. I'm not religious myself, but I often find myself arguing on the side of religion because pretentious atheists really bother me. It's one thing to not believe; it's another to revel in your ignorance in the subject matter. Since I was raised in a devoutly religious family and in a sect that really emphasizes knowledge of biblical text, I understand it from an intellectual standpoint, …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 06:34 PM
5

And yes even a woman who enjoys being a homemaker will grow resentful if she isn’t appropriately appreciated and constantly told her value add is easy peasy. Thank you. Was just about to make this point. I'm one of those people for whom homemaking comes naturally. It's in my nature to feed people and clean the house and be nurturing and giving. But a person who takes that for granted and acts as if the things I do are frivolous and without value would squash my desire to serve them real quick. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 04:39 PM
2

Yeah, I'd agree. If the attraction isn't there, they're straight, no matter how many girls they kiss.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 03:34 PM
2

Well, I think the problem is that OP thinks that since these women have made out with women, they're not "100% straight."
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 06:07 AM
2

Right, that's what I'm saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 09:39 PM
5

It would depend on whether he was genuinely attracted to the person or not. An opportunistic homosexual experience isn't necessarily indicative of homosexual orientation.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 09:23 PM
8

Could you attempt an explanation as to why that is? I experience unattractive men the same way I experience women. They're sexual blanks. I think men see it as "An ugly woman is still a woman (and therefore good enough for sex)," but I don't think of it that way. An ugly man isn't appealing to me just because he's a man. He's exactly as appealing as a woman is (which is to say, not at all.) Given that, and the fact that hetero sex is physically and psychologically invasive in a way lesbian sex i…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 09:14 PM
3

I remember seein u say youd never hook up with even an extremely masculine woman because youre straight. I wouldn't. I'm talking a "gun to my head" scenario where I had to choose between a woman or an unattractive man or a woman. In such a scenario, I'd choose the woman, because if I don't want to have sex either way, at least lesbian sex is less risky and less likely to be painful. I wouldn't have sex with a woman of my own volition. I'm saying it's the least unappealing of two unappealing opti…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 09:07 PM
4

See, this is interesting. Because even as a straight woman, if given the option between sex with a woman and sex with an unattractive man, I'd take the woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 08:23 PM
1

I inferred this based on their own responses, which went something along these lines: women stating they are straight, then proceed to refer to their past homosexual interactions and sex with women; that they've had sexual fantasies and attractions to women; have masturbated with women on their minds, and generally being open to have sex with women in the future. I see. Yeah, I wouldn't consider such women to be straight either. As for their consumption of lesbian porn, the reason they give do n…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 07:45 PM
5

claimed straight but inherently bisexual Curious what you mean by this. Is this something they said about themselves, or is "inherently bisexual" your own assumption/conclusion? If the latter, what are you basing it on? Anyway, I think I'm probably in the "thoroughly straight" category. I've never been remotely sexually interested in women. Never even been curious. Never experimented or kissed girl friends when I was younger, none of that. The idea of interacting with a woman sexually is alien a…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 06:05 PM
2

Lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 04:18 PM
1

Haha, no.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 04:06 PM
1

I met my ex through Tumblr, haha.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 03:44 AM
3

Thank you for doing this so I didn't have to.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 07:06 PM
2

My bff met her boo on that app. I never heard of it until she told me about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 06:27 PM
7

Most romantic story in this thread tbh
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 06:09 PM
2

Aw, cute.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 05:59 PM
2

No jabs here, I think that's awesome. Kudos to both of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 05:58 PM
3

😂 That's so cute. Do you guys plan to move near each other at some point?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 05:54 PM
5

This thread is adorable, aw
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 05:52 PM
4

Omg this is me and my husband. I'm pretty sure I was the first one to drunkenly slur "I love you" but it was months before either of us said it sober.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 05:44 PM
3

It was all very rom comish. Which I guess makes me the awkward leading lady tripping over my own feet. The roof was a very common hangout for our group though. My friend's parents owned a bunch of small town hardware stores and she managed one of them and lived in an apartment above it. Which meant her back door opened up to a roof instead of a yard. Many a good time was had on that roof (and many a cop was called on us.)
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 05:34 PM
6

In the summer of 2011 I was dumped by what I thought was a serious boyfriend. I was pretty depressed and anti-social for a couple of months. My roommate at the time, a lifelong guy friend, finally got fed up with my moping and forced me to go out one night. We went to this trashy bar with cheap drinks, and "ran into" our friend A and his roommate, who I had never met before. The roommate and I hit if off immediately and started drinking, flirting and dancing. I had an instant crush. At the end o…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 05:18 PM
2

I've never even attempted something like that. I can't imagine it would go well for me either. Plus I don't think I have the bone structure for it. I see all these makeup tutorials that are like "Highlight your jawline and your cheekbones" and I'm like, "What jawline? What cheekbones?" Lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 03:53 AM
3

💰💰💰
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 03:46 AM
2

You won't get an argument from me on that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 02:53 AM
5

Yeah I think guys see these crazy makeup transformations on Instagram or whatever and think that's the typical girl's makeup routine. Most of us aren't wizards like that. I'm like you, I'm very bad at makeup and wear the same basic look (bronzer, eyeliner, mascara) every day.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 02:48 AM
1

Yes. I work for a public university.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 02:39 AM
2

Ok? My point is that I'd rather be a "wage slave" than a business owner, and the dichotomy is a weird one in the first place IMO. The implication behind these comments seems to be that "wage slaves" are idiots who don't realize they're being taken advantage of by "the man" or whatever. When the fact is that not everybody is cut out to be a business owner and there's nothing wrong with just being someone's employee. But then I'm probably one of those useless bloodsucking government workers you're…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 02:31 AM
2

😂
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 01:59 AM
6

I don't understand what's so bad about being a wage slave. I get decent money, health insurance, vacation time and a retirement account. That's pretty nice. My parents owned a couple of small businesses and did okay for themselves but they worked themselves to death for years. I'd rather have a job that I get to leave at work every day.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 01:37 AM
8

Yeah I'm baffled by this.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 07:18 PM
4

True in my experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 06:00 PM
2

A number that large would give me pause, but I highly doubt I'd ever encounter a person like that, and I don't really like entertaining outlandish hypotheticals. I'm sure I have a threshold, but I'm not sure exactly where it is. In reality it's just never been an issue because the guys I've dated (as far as I know) were well under any number I might find alarming.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 04:52 PM
2

Yeah. Up until the last few years I've always been very thin, even medically underweight at times. In 2013 I weighed 112lbs at 5'7. I was REALLY skinny. But I haven't been smaller than a size 4 since puberty because of my hips. I just don't have the bone structure of a size 0-2 and no amount of weight loss would make it so. My "natural" size is probably a 6. Meanwhile, my BFF who's always had a couple inches and 10lbs on me is an effortless size 2 because she has a waifish model body with long, …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 02:53 AM
5

I really do not care. At this point in my life I wouldn't want a virgin, but aside from that I don't have a preference and can't imagine why I would.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 02:19 AM
2

How so? He's better styled, but as far as his actual features go I don't think he's anything remarkable.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/18 11:10 PM
6

Average Average IMO a very average looking celebrity
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/18 03:19 PM
6

She's wearing quite a bit of makeup.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/18 02:34 PM
14

I'm a woman. It's fine. How I feel during the act really depends on my mood and how horny I am. Sometimes I really enjoy it and relish his reactions and find it really hot. Sometimes I'm making a grocery list in my head. It really just depends.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/18 02:32 PM
11

This is obviously true.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/18 04:55 PM
1

Whatever the outcome I wish you the best. Sounds like you're going through a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/18 04:42 PM
2

These are good ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/18 03:06 PM
3

Yeah that's what I was thinking. She was probably thinking it was a red flag that this guy she barely knew wanted her to meet his mom, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/18 03:05 PM
1

29F, married, blue with some purple/red leanings. I'd say around 7-8. I'm in a good place right now, but I'm anxious because my husband and I are sort of at an in-between place with regards to our future. We want to buy a house this year and start trying for kids, but we aren't quite sure if we want to stay where we currently are, or move closer to my family or his. There are pros and cons to each option, and a lot of moving parts that affect the decision, so we're not sure what we're going to d…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/18 01:45 AM
2

Some people just don't understand the bond you can have with an animal I guess. My cat-soulmate died eight years ago and I still miss her every day.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/18 06:05 PM
6

😂
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/18 02:26 PM
7

Brayden. I loled
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/18 02:25 PM
4

Gay people still have sex...
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/18 04:44 AM
2

I don't know or care.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/18 12:05 AM
10

I can only speak for myself. I've never been raped, abused, assaulted, don't have a bad family background, no mental illnesses, never suffered trauma of any kind. I just prefer sex to be a show of affection and a way to make each other feel good. I enjoy being the submissive partner, and I think the female role in sex is naturally submissive, but I don't think that necessitates being degraded, hurt or called offensive names. I wouldn't submit to a man who treated me that way; it wouldn't make me…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/18 12:01 AM
8

Have I got some news for you...
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 11:22 PM
3

I don't want to be choked, slapped or called a whore, no. u/RockinSocksII pretty much has my thoughts on the matter covered.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 11:16 PM
4

I always say if someone wanted to torture me for information they'd just have to tickle me and I'd talk in about thirty seconds. I can't stand that shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 09:53 PM
2

💯
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 09:51 PM
9

Date people who don't make poor life choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 08:55 PM
8

I'm the same, very average by pretty much any metric. I'm even ISFJ which is the most common female type. And I often find myself in agreement with the supposedly "outlier" xNTx women here. I am willing to accept that the women here are outliers, but then if that's the case I see no reason to believe the men here are as average as they claim to be either.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 06:48 PM
3

Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 03:56 PM
2

Lol yeah. I think it's a Venn diagram of sorts. It's also possible my answer was incorrect. I believe that's what I've read but this isn't exactly my area of expertise.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 03:36 AM
2

This is my dad's favorite saying, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 03:22 AM
1

Eyyyyyy
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 03:21 AM
2

From what I understand, a kink is just something unorthodox that you enjoy. A fetish is something you NEED to get off. So if a guy is just really into anal, that's a kink. If he can't cum without anal, that's a fetish.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 02:49 AM
7

Well, no. It's not an "if...then" statement. I don't want anything in my butthole and I don't want to put anything in someone else's butthole. That's not "quid pro quo" it's just a boundary because I think buttholes are gross. Quid pro quo would be "If you don't put anything in my butthole then I won't put anything in yours."
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 02:40 AM
3

I appreciate this comment and you're exactly right. Thank you <3
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 02:37 AM
9

Did you mean to reply to my comment? I don't think anyone should take anything in the ass. I don't like the whole "quid pro quo" idea that gets floated on this topic, because fucking a man in the ass is just as unappealing as getting fucked in the ass. I'll take normal non-butthole sex, thanks. "Natural desires" be damned.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 11:48 PM
33

If a man's desire to assfuck his wife is indeed natural (as I posit), and not artificially induced by society, is it not the wife's duty to bend to accommodate? Not seeing how you get from point A to point B here tbh. It's also natural for me to not want a dick up my ass. Why do his natural desires outweigh mine?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 08:42 PM
3

Speaking for myself though, I would much rather my husband came in with a big smile and a genuine thank you than picking up half the housework. YES. I always say this. I swear 99% of the time when women complain about not having "help" around the house, what they really mean is what they do around the house isn't appreciated. Acknowledgment and a thank you can do wonders.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 03:56 PM
7

Exactly! I don't really even see the point in looking at it as him doing something "for me" or vice versa. We're both doing things that keep the household running smoothly and pleasant to live in. We both benefit from that and we both benefit from having a happy spouse. Idk, it's just really not that hard and I feel sorry for the people who make themselves miserable with all this bean-counting and/or have partners who take their efforts for granted.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 03:38 PM
1

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 03:34 PM
1

Yeah blue collar guys never get laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 12:25 PM
3

The whole "she would do it anyway, so who cares" reasoning is so small-minded and petty and grotesque. Mr. Arthur was going to the gym for years before we started dating, so should I not be grateful to him that he stays in shape? I just made this point in another comment and it seemed to be missed by my interlocutor. But yes, this is exactly my thinking. I mean, think about going to the store or restaurant or movie theater or whatever. What do you say at the end of your transaction? If you're no…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 02:13 AM
3

🍵
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 02:05 AM
12

So you should be grateful if he's doing it. He's actually doing something that you would otherwise have to do. I meant it's something he'd be doing if he were single. Which is the attitude I see here a lot. "Why should she get praise for cooking and cleaning and taking care of the kids? She'd be doing those things even if I wasn't around." You're also missing the other aspect I listed, which is "I could do that myself, so them doing it isn't a benefit." You can scroll down and find an example of…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 11:03 PM
16

No they are arguing that if you were going to do it for yourself anyway, then it doesnt count if you do it - regardless of it you claim its for them Right, and I think that's insane. Laundry is something my husband would be doing anyway, but why can't I be grateful that he did it (and thus I don't have to)? I'm driving his car today, and when I go home I'm going to put gas in the tank. That's something I would need to do in order to get home, but why can't he be grateful that he now doesn't have…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 10:31 PM
12

Yes! I don't understand this. Like, if my husband orders pizza, am I supposed to not be grateful and excited about the pizza because he ALSO likes pizza and that means it's not something he strictly did "for me"? This is such a bizarre upside-down way of approaching things.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 09:40 PM
32

I've seen two recurring arguments on this topic come up here from time to time that I find confusing, and they are: 1) If you could do something yourself or if it's something they were going to do anyway, it doesn't count when someone does it for you. 2) If you wouldn't have done the thing yourself, it doesn't count when someone does it for you. Call me crazy but this seems like a recipe for cultivating a permanent state of ingratitude and discontent. By holding these beliefs you set up a scenar…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 09:27 PM
13

I don't think his standards are that high. I mean, he deigned to be attracted to a lowly 7/10!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 08:13 PM
3

I drive almost as far two or three times every month to see my daughters. Do you not see the difference between your children and a girlfriend? I drive 12 hours once a month to visit my parents. I wouldn't do that for some guy I'm dating. Boyfriends and girlfriends aren't FAMILY. If women make a big deal about this amount of effort (which I consider pretty minimal in the greater scheme of things) there really is little point in entering LTRs or marriage. It just seems like men in this thread are…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 03:38 PM
3

You say you were "seeing" this woman; I find that terminology telling. You don't even call her your girlfriend. How long had you been together? How much time had you actually spent with each other (considering you apparently live 12 hours apart by car)? What was the level of commitment? A twelve hour drive is a huge ask. Actually it's a 24-hour drive when you count driving back. An entire day, not including stops. Then there's the four or so days she needed to spend with you. That's the better p…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 02:45 PM
1

Lol, you sound like my mom. Her favorite gifts are tools and lawn stuff. My dad gave her a nice riding mower with a big bow on it for her birthday a couple years ago and she was ecstatic.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 01:45 PM
9

14th century Europe Ah, the Victorian age.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 01:32 PM
2

I agree. Was just responding in the context of that comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 03:21 AM
2

Of course. The person above is a woman saying she wish she knew what it was like to have sex with an uncircumcised man so I was describing the experience of having sex with one, not the experience of being one.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/18 03:10 AM
1

I'm a little confused by your OP, but I'm going to answer assuming this is the point you're trying to make. The equivalent to buying a woman an appliance would probably be buying a man a suit for work. Or something else boring and work-related like a printer. It's not a fun or exciting gift because it just reminds you of the boring shit you have to do every day. While tools enforce the male gender role and are related to the work men do around the house, a lot of men find them fun and use them f…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 09:52 PM
2

Yeah I think they're saying shoes aren't a good comparison. But again that's just my best guess. It is a confusing OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 09:30 PM
1

I think what OP is saying is that the equivalent to giving a man a tool set would be giving a woman appliance, because they're both gifts that imply they'll be doing work at some point.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 09:23 PM
9

When my oldest brother was born my mom cried about how ugly he was. (He eventually grew into a really cute kid and a handsome man. But he was a VERY ugly baby.)
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 07:23 PM
6

Same. I've dated two and married one. In the 6 years we've been having sex there has never been a single time where it looked, smelled or tasted gross/dirty. Same with my ex for the two years we were together. Just like... take showers? And it won't be an issue? Not hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 06:13 PM
2

What age did you first have sex (as in piv or anal), and was this age typical for your peer group? Nineteen. This was late for my peer group at large, but it was pretty typical among my friends although there were a couple outliers in either direction. What age did you first want to have sex, and did you pursue it at the time? Tough to answer. I was doing "stuff" with a guy at 17, and I wanted to have sex but I was too timid/nervous to go through with it. I think I wanted to lose it to an actual…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 04:40 PM
3

Yeah I'm sure that's true. If I were a dude I wouldn't do it unless there was some medical reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 03:41 AM
4

I've never been with an uncircumcised man, both my lovers are cut. I would like to someday though, just to see what the difference is during sex. Honestly, it's a negligible difference imo. The texture is a little different (to me it's most noticable during oral, not PIV) but really the main difference is aesthetic which I don't care about. If your bf felt that strongly about it why didn't he just go get it done as an adult? It's not super common, but there are definitely doctors willing to do i…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 02:54 AM
9

I've been with two uncircumcised men - my college boyfriend and my husband. My college bf had a real complex about being uncut, said he hated his parents for not getting him circumcised and said he would circumcise his sons. My husband is ambivalent about it but says he doesn't want our future sons circumcised since there's really no benefit. He's also from an ethnic group where it isn't a common practice. I have no preference one way or the other and have always said I'd just leave it up to the…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 02:39 AM
4

Technically I think we all come out of the fuckbox.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/18 08:57 PM
3

I never had sex with a guy I wouldn't at least consider dating. Sometimes it didn't lead to anything more, so he became a "fuck only" guy retroactively, but I didn't go into it thinking "I'll fuck him but I'd never date him." I don't speak for all women though.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/18 08:55 PM
9

Yeah but do they go in the fuck only box?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/18 06:17 PM
2

I recently had to drive two hours to pick up my friend and his gf in the middle of nowhere because HE hadn't checked the oil in months and his engine went out. ¯\(ツ)/¯
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/18 03:15 PM
4

Are "date," "friend" and "relationship" not categories?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/18 01:26 AM
1

It's a powerful song, but I'm just not a fan of wining songs about a dudes wife cheating on him. Well it's heavily implied that he murders her, if that helps. lol It's not among my favorite songs of theirs actually, but they're my favorite band and I wanted a username inspired by one of their songs and that was the only good one I could think of. Of course, I've since thought of like 20 more, but I'm attached to the name at this point. As far as Caro Emerald, she the latest in a line of female a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 11:10 PM
3

I can show my ''love'' in other ways that match my beliefs. What ways would those be? Just curious.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 11:01 PM
1

Ooh catchy tune! It's actually a reference to a country song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ki4VJCsF0qk
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 10:54 PM
2

The cooks have drugs.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 10:43 PM
3

You're confused. She's saying that some women don't have casual sex, and the ones who do have casual sex usually have flings/FWB instead of ONS. She's not saying flings/FWB aren't casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 10:11 PM
1

That makes sense. I don't really run with a feminist/sex pos crowd so maybe that's why I haven't experienced it as much.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 08:12 PM
2

Okie dokie
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 02:33 PM
2

Sex with the promise of commitment that may or may not happen? Lol this is literally, exactly how modern dating goes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 02:31 PM
4

Same. Most of my friends don't even know about most of the guys I slept with, let alone what I did with them or how long it took etc. The one person who might know a little bit is my college roommate, and I don't see or talk to her anymore and I'm sure she's long forgotten what little she knew. I don't know if it's generational, if you and I just have peculiar social circles or if this kind of thing is just an internet fiction. All I can say is this is never something I've encountered or partici…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 02:24 PM
3

Well it's kind of hard to point to examples that aren't wealthy, because it's easier to use a common reference point and the only way to do that is to point to celebrities, politicians, etc. Public figures, most of whom are wealthy. I could tell you this guy Scott from my hometown is alpha, but that's pretty worthless since you don't know Scott. But first things first, we need to find some common grounds in our terminology since there is some contention over these terms. What makes someone an al…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/18 01:14 AM
3

Well I was on the fence at first but now I'm sold. Where do I sign?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/18 02:46 PM
2

Your explanation sounds normal to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/18 12:10 AM
2

I often -- not always, but often -- find that there's an inverse correlation between between bookish intelligence and kindness. And given the choice, I'll take kindness any day.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/18 07:38 PM
1

Hahaha, wow.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/18 07:27 PM
2

Lol, me too, on an old account. iirc it was because I said something "hurt like a bitch."
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/18 05:37 PM
3

Playing the tiniest of violins for the men in this thread complaining that hitting the cervix hurts THEM. Lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/18 01:51 AM
1

I care very much about what my husband thinks of me. I care very much (though less than I used to) what my family thinks of me. I care what my friends think of me in that I hope they think I am a nice and fun person, but I don't really care what they think of the decisions I make. I care that my coworkers and superiors see me as competent and valuable to the team, but I don't particularly care whether they like me as a person. As far as wider "society" goes, I don't particularly care. I've never…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/18 06:13 PM
2

Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/18 05:08 PM
1

A person with my exact personality in a male body would be incel for sure, and probably struggle with a lot of other issues. I'd definitely rather stay female.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/18 02:11 PM
4

then just network until she finds the right guy. a 19 year old girl might not socialize with successful older guys but she probably knows people who do (older sister, coworkers, etc). This is a pretty big assumption. or get a job as a receptionist or runner for a law firm. Ok, this isn't bad. or get a job at a restaurant in the part of town where the doctors or stockbrokers all go to lunch. This is ridiculous. Do you think doctors and stock brokers marry waitresses? or hell just get on tinder se…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/18 01:44 AM
8

if a 19 year old women who wants to be a career can put in the time and effort to earn a degree and get a job, then surely a 19 year old woman who wants to be a housewife can figure out where to find a decent guy looking to settle down and start a family. There is a very clear-cut path to getting a degree and a job. Apply for school, go to school, make good grades (or hell, don't), graduate, apply for jobs, get job. Simple. Do you have a similarly clear-cut process for how an average young woman…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/18 12:11 AM
10

Or maybe 19-year-old girls don't generally cross paths with established, wealthy men looking for a wife. They cross paths with men of their own age group, most of whom aren't looking for marriage at that point in their lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 11:26 PM
3

40F-50F, which I would've considered shorts and t shirt weather back in the Northeast As someone who's never lived outside of Texas, this is crazy talk to me. I think anything below 70F is cold, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 11:20 PM
4

MBTI.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 11:14 PM
3

"You should smile more!" OK, I will say that I HATE this one. It annoyed me as a teenager when I waited tables and well-meaning, older male customers would say "Give us a smile, sweetheart!" I had terrible teeth when I was younger and was extremely self-conscious about it, so I never smiled with my teeth. It made me wildly uncomfortable when people would force one out of me. I also have one of those faces that looks perma-sad; my mouth naturally turns downward, and my eyes have a very wet/watery…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 10:59 PM
4

To each their own. It's fun to me but I get why it's not everyone's thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 10:54 PM
9

I don't relate to her experience because not every woman in the corporate world goes in to climb the ladder. Corporations often have good benefits, health care blah, blah, there are many good reasons to opt to work as a corporate drone if you are just a normal middling person who wants to work hard and make enough money but has no ambitions, or just modest ones. This. I'm continually annoyed by the assumption that all working women are working for "fulfillment" or are obsessed with power and ach…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 10:52 PM
3

What on earth are "U-shaped teeth"?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 10:03 PM
5

Yeah, while I understand the distinction I'm not sure what purpose it serves since all teasing, when done well, achieves the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 09:09 PM
6

I think I see the distinction. I'll give you a gender-flipped example that I observed personally. In college I was at a country bar with some friends, and my buddy kept hitting on this one girl who was clearly into him but acting kind of aloof/playing hard to get. Finally he gets her to dance with him, and while they're dancing she says, "Wow, you're a really good dancer! Most guys who can dance this well are gay." So she gave him a compliment, but tempered it with a subtle insult. I think that'…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 08:50 PM
17

I can't relate to people who don't do playful teasing. I've talked about this before, but I grew up with two older brothers who teased me mercilessly, and as I got older I was able to dish it out too. That just became sort of the norm for me when interacting with guys. I would lose interest quickly in a guy who didn't know how to tease and be teased. I don't think it makes someone an asshole, but I can see how it could come across that way to someone who's less socially savvy or who finds teasin…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/18 08:04 PM
3

OK so I'm not the only one who picked up on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 11:35 PM
1

Yes exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/18 01:02 AM
1

I mean, we were all young women at one time. Personally I only had one or two friends when I was younger (college age) who liked to talk about sex in blunt, crude terms, and the rest of us thought they were kind of gross/annoying. But that could just be my social circle.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 11:41 PM
2

I think she means women are more reticent to discuss details about men they're in love with. When a guy's just a hookup, you don't mind sharing a funny story, talking about his weird looking dick or whatever. But when he's your boyfriend you don't want to share anything that would make him (and by extension, you) look bad, so you don't go into too much detail about your sex life.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 11:37 PM
3

Yeah, this is my experience too. I've never had the kind of female friend group where we discussed these things graphically. We're all just kind of private about that stuff, I guess, plus like you said, it's awkward when the guys being discussed are part of the friend group too.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/18 08:20 PM
7

I think he thinks you're a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/18 05:26 PM
3

Ya it would actually assuming each woman put out at least 3 kids with each man. That would be literally impossible. A woman would have to be pregnant for 60 years straight to have three kids with twenty men.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 10:52 PM
2

Are you Christian? Because Christian marriage is "till death do us part." If your daughter's "marriage" does not last until death, any subsequent relationships she may have will be fornication under biblical law. Far be it from me to dictate how you should live your life or raise your kids. I'm just confused because you keep referring to God and religious concepts, but your idea of marriage and fornication doesn't align with that of any religion I know of.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 06:48 PM
1

Yes. Government is not the arbiter. It literally is though. Dating + marriage-till-death-do-us part is a false paradigm of relationships. I don't understand this sentence, can you clarify?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 05:52 PM
1

she can marry (which I define as a committed, serious relationship with family-building potential) I'm confused. Do you mean you'd consider your daughter married if her relationship met those criteria, regardless of if she was legally married?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 05:50 PM
6

Exactly. Thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 04:39 AM
3

This is like making a product that doesn't sell, and instead of examining the quality of your product or tweaking your marketing strategy, you write your congressman and ask him to encourage people to start liking your product.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/18 02:48 AM
8

Preach. This was my unwavering stance in the controversial paternity test thread(s).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 11:46 PM
13

I like you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 11:44 PM
17

One who will ask her for a paternity test.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 11:18 PM
14

What I mean is that I'm drawing different conclusions from the same observations. TRP sees a guy having hot, wild sex with a girl who will drive two hours to spend the night with him. They say, "It's because he's Chad." I say, "It's because the relationship is new and novel and that's how honeymoon period sex is." Then they observe a husband and wife who have routine, vanilla sex a couple times a week when they're both feeling up to it, and they say "See! She doesn't want to fuck her husband the…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 07:29 PM
9

Sure, I'm not going to deny that. But even the two hottest people in the world are going to have a more relaxed, comfortable approach to sex after 10+ years together than they had in the beginning.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 06:36 PM
14

okie dokie
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 05:05 PM
11

Well there's a reason I put "Chad" in quotation marks, and it's because I think "Chad" is just a silly word for the exciting honeymoon period sex you have with a new partner. I think most women experienced with their husbands in the beginning. But like I said, we can agree to disagree. We're not going to change each other's minds on this.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 05:04 PM
16

I don't think the number of partners you've had before decreases your likelihood of enjoying sex with a new partner. And all husbands were new partners once. In fact, I think the husband being "Chad" is more likely than ever in the 21st century, where many if not most LTRs and marriages begin with casual sex. But I don't expect us to agree on this.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 04:58 PM
34

Women will turn down sex with their husband who is right next to them but in the past used to drive 30 mins at 2:00 am to Chad’s house What you're missing is that the husband probably was "Chad" at one point. Meaning that the initial dating/honeymoon phase of their relationship was probably just as exciting and passionate as you're imagining her casual flings to be, but over time they settled into a more relaxed, comfortable relationship but not as "OMG I must have you now" passionate as it once…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 04:04 PM
2

Are you a man or a woman? My husband is ISTP. I always say having cats my whole life prepared me to live with him. By that I mean, he can be very affectionate when he wants to be, but it has to happen on his terms and his timeline. He can't be told what to do, and resents anyone who tries. ISTP's aren't the type to be open and upfront with their feelings, which can be frustrating, so they generally need a partner who can read between the lines and not take their moods personally. (That's somethi…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/18 03:54 PM
10

Also, there is a decent amount of research suggesting that couples where the woman is objectively more attractive than the man report higher levels of satisfaction (on both sides) than couples where the man is objectively more attractive than the woman. This makes sense to me, given how many guys (here and IRL) I've heard say they don't really try if the girl isn't hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/18 05:02 PM
1

Are childish and feminine mutually exclusive? How does social media differ in any real way from the cultivating of social circles and observance/discussion of social dynamics that women have always done?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 10:49 PM
6

Mine too. He turns 30 this weekend and his hair is still thick and luscious, no signs of receding or losing it at all. I'm really happy about that.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 08:24 PM
5

They also tend to not be single for long. They go from boyfriend to boyfriend but aren't having a lot of one-off casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 06:55 PM
6

How are makeup and social media not feminine?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 02:00 PM
1

Yeah this is my experience as well. In college it was not at all unusual for an undergrad to date a grad student, and these are often 5+ year age differences. Both of my best friends got married at at 20 and 21 to guys five and six years older than them, respectively. When I was 21 I had a brief fling with a pharmacy student who was 27. This all seemed normal and no one batted an eye.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/18 05:00 AM
2

I just went to RPW and read your comment and I concur.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 08:22 PM
2

Yeah I agree. There is actually a lot of academic literature out there about this, not necessarily about dating relationships (though that might exist too) but about birth order and sibling dynamics. Seven seems to be the magic number when it comes to generational markers.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 05:30 PM
6

I also don't recall the last time I was a dick to you Oh, well, it's literally every time you reply to one of my comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 05:24 PM
9

OK yes, I was talking about adult relationships, not high school, and certainly not middle school. (Although to be honest, I don't consider a 14-year-old and a 19-year-old to be a significant age gap either.) And yes, I'm aware I'm older than 25. Is there a reason you're such a relentless dick to me? Did I do something to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 05:21 PM
5

idk, apparently when OP talks about "older man/younger woman" relationships he means a 5-10 year age gap.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 05:16 PM
14

No, not really. I just understand how generations work and know that people who are five years apart in age are going to have very similar experiences, cultural references, etc. I'm 29. I'm not going to have difficulty relating to or understanding a 24-year-old or a 34-year-old. For all intents and purposes, we're contemporaries. On the other hand I have a brother who's 9 and a half years older than me and it's obvious that he and I grew up in very different worlds, and as a result have a hard t…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 05:15 PM
19

I don't really even consider 5 years to be "older." You're still roughly agemates.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 04:59 PM
3

I'm still confused by your categorizations. Red pillers here tend to be more traditional-leaning while blue pillers tend to be more progressive. It seems like you're saying almost the opposite, unless I'm reading you wrong. It also seems like you've set up a strange false dichotomy. Personally, I want (and have) a relationship with someone I like and whose company I enjoy (your "blue pill" model) and I also believe in treating marriage as a partnership where each individual brings their own valu…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/18 12:14 AM
5

I'm confused by your categories. Marriage as business partnership is "old family values." There's nothing traditional or dogmatic about relationship partners being "friends." That's a very novel concept.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/18 10:51 PM
1

Me too.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/18 08:56 PM
2

Just FYI, on desktop when a person's comment shows up in your inbox, there should be a "block user" button underneath. They will still be able to reply to you but you won't see their comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/18 06:19 PM
6

disliking the same people generally is a good way to see how compatible we are Haha, that's so true.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/18 04:23 PM
2

If I'm not mistaken, the most recent school shooter's father died when he was young. So while he was raised by a "single mother" it's not exactly like that was her fault.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/18 04:41 AM
3

They're at least not lesbians, as the commenter above suggested.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/18 11:26 PM
2

Tons of straight women watch lesbian porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/18 09:32 PM
8

Well, here's the thing with these studies. They don't measure the tastes of "women," they measure the tastes of women who A, watch porn, B, take the time to actually search specific terms, and C, have an account on a porn site (I'm assuming this is where the male/female data comes from.) That is a very small, specific subset of women, and it's not surprising that that subset might have some specific and out-there tastes.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/18 06:35 PM
3

The people in the trenches doing the thankless work are most likely also women.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/18 04:26 PM
2

What? Something can be desirable while still being amoral. Hair color is amoral, but if you like blondes then blondes are desirable to you. Height is amoral, but tall men are desirable to women. Morality is just one measure of good/bad. There are plenty of others, though most are subjective to the individual.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/18 02:27 PM
1

Maybe I just don't have a good grasp on the word, but can you explain to me why these people are narcissists? They seem like run-of-the-mill trashy assholes, but I'm not sure I see the narcissism in these stories.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/18 03:30 PM
5

inb4 "That's not feminine that's just annoying"
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/18 07:40 AM
1

I keep seeing people saying John Krasinski is hot (and he is!), but am I the only one who finds the guy who plays Roy hotter?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/18 07:39 AM
2

I guess maybe humans just aren't built for lasting happyness I think people just need to recalibrate their happiness meters. If I'm not happy, and no one I know is happy, is it really that we're all unhappy or do I just have an unrealistic idea of what "happy" means?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/18 12:05 AM
2

Yeah, you're probably right.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/18 07:28 PM
36

When I was teaching high school, I had a kid in one of my classes that everyone called "Afro" because of his hair (he was half Jewish, half black, and had an amazing fro.) He was one of those stoner kids that would always cut class and get into trouble, but he took a liking to me, and he and his best friend would sometimes hang out in my room before and after school and talk to me. One day, he showed up with short hair. I asked him why the haircut and he looked like he was about to cry and said …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/18 07:26 PM
3

Oh come on. This is EXACTLY what men do. "You're really cool and we're having a lot of fun together. Why do we need to label it? Let's just hang out and see where it goes..." with no intention of it ever "going" anywhere. Pump and dumps happen too, but let's not pretend guys don't ever lead girls on.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/18 02:43 PM
6

"Leader of the free world" has been a colloquial phrase used to describe the US president since the '50s. It's not like I just made it up and it's not some official title. Don't take it so seriously.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/18 01:32 PM
2

I already said I understand why guys want the test, they have a right to get it and I would give my husband my blessing to get one if he asked. I would still be sad about it. Life would go on. No amount of logic and explanation is going to change my feelings about it, only time would do that. For the life of me I can't figure out why "I would be hurt but I'd let him get the test" is being met with "HE DESERVES TO GET THE TEST, YOUR FEELS DON'T MATTER." I understand that which is why I'm saying I…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/18 03:42 AM
5

Donald Trump is a billionaire and leader of the free world What the? Billionaire yes, but the US hasn't been "leading the free world" since G20. It's an expression. Pretend I said president of the US if that makes you feel better.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/18 03:41 AM
8

He only has one kid from Melania, the other four are from previous marriages.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/18 01:17 AM
15

Is Donald happy? Is Melania happy? They're probably happy enough. I doubt either of them have a great deal of romantic fulfillment, but I don't think that was either of their goals. Donald Trump is a billionaire and leader of the free world, and Melania I'm sure enjoys the luxuries this lifestyle affords and seems to take great joy in being a mother. I'm not too worried about either of them. Is Melania sexually attracted to Donald? Doubtful but possible. Also doubtful that he cares. What do you …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 11:48 PM
3

bruh, if anyone in Fleetwood Mac starts giving you relationship advice, you should probably do the exact opposite. Hahaha ain't that the truth.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 10:06 PM
1

Hahaha, that's cute.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 08:53 PM
11

I remember that thread. It was maybe the most baffled and aghast I've ever been on this sub, and that's saying a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 08:52 PM
17

That's what I'm thinking. It's always framed as these guys being innocent victims of these conniving women, but I'm pretty sure most of these gold dig-ees are aware of the arrangement and are fine with it. I mean, does anyone think Trump thinks Melania truly loves him? Or that he cares, for that matter?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 02:58 AM
2

She said she was the child of poor white trash. Seeing as her mom grew up without indoor plumbing picking cotton in Oklahoma, I'd say she qualifies.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 02:50 AM
4

Oh absolutely. When you do something in secret, that means IN SECRET, not "in secret except for Bill and Steve and Ed (and Bill and Steve and Ed's wives, and their wives' sisters, and their sisters' friends...)"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 12:19 AM
10

Yeah. I see no downside, it seems like the best approach for everyone involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 12:17 AM
7

I mean, the way I see it is this. If he feels the need to hide something from me, it's because he knows that whatever he's hiding would hurt me very badly if I ever found out. I'm a very, very sensitive person. I'm also very forgiving, but forgiving does not mean forgetting, and I have a hard time looking at people the same way once they've hurt me. Knowing he did something that hurt me would harm my trust in him, my attraction to him, my love for him, my comfort with him. THAT would put up a wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 12:15 AM
22

This question came up in the other thread. I and several other women said this would be much more acceptable. IMO, if you're at all concerned about paternity, this is the way to do it -- way ahead of time, when the topic of kids is first broached as a hypothetical future scenario. Not in the 11th hour when she's pregnant and hormonal or just gave birth. Not only does broaching the topic this way make it less about her specifically and more about the principle, it also avoids what in my opinion i…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 11:05 PM
27

Most of us said that we'd let our husband get the test, we would just be hurt/angry about it because of what it implies about us and his faith in us. The "You wouldn't be mad if you had nothing to hide" thing doesn't really fly in real life; most people don't appreciate being distrusted for no reason. As a clingy, jealous girl who's tried to snoop on boyfriends or outright asked them to tell me where they are so I don't have to worry about them cheating, I can say with certainty that guys don't …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 10:28 PM
39

Out of wedlock does not necessarily mean single parent home, especially in countries where marriage doesn't have the social connotations it has in the US. I don't know much about Iceland, but if these "out of wedlock" children are being born to cohabitating parents in a committed, stable relationship, they're in a much better situation than most out of wedlock children in the US.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 09:50 PM
5

Lying is an integral part to maintaining happy relationships Preach.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 08:56 PM
9

I'm not necessarily saying it's "okay" to cheat. I think cheating is abhorrent whether the other person finds out or not. I have moral objections to it and I would never do it myself even if I was 1000000% certain I would never be found out. But I'm not trying to police morality, and that's why I said I'm really only focusing on outcomes. If they never find out, then it's "okay" in terms of you not getting caught or having to pay any repercussions. The only consequence will be your own guilty co…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 08:46 PM
6

I don't really believe in "lies of omission." A man getting a paternity test behind his wife's back isn't lying to her, unless at some point he explicitly said he would never do that (which would be weird.) He's just going behind her back to avoid causing confrontation in the relationship. I don't have a problem with this at all. It's hard to say what is and isn't "okay" to do, because really it all hinges on the other person finding out. If I found out my husband went behind my back and got a p…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 08:33 PM
10

This is an excellent comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 06:40 PM
3

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 03:40 PM
11

But yes this being something he cares about should be brought up way before pregnancy unless he wants a hormonal and blindsided spouse on his hands. This. Don't wait till the 11th hour to ask for a paternity test.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 03:38 PM
2

What if he told you way before having the child that he would want such test? Like "if we ever have a child together i want to get it tested as a matter of principle" Yeah I just talked about this in another comment. This would be okay with me; I wouldn't take it personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 03:15 PM
3

I'm not sure that's true. I don't think birth certificates are issued immediately, at least they didn't used to be. My birth certificate is listed as being issued in October '88; I was born in August. Anyway, prenatal paternity tests are dangerous to both the baby and the mother, so I wouldn't do one regardless. If he wants a paternity test I'd agree to hold off on him signing the birth certificate until the results come back. But my feelings would still be hurt.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 02:15 PM
5

Yeah this is exactly how I feel. If we were talking about having kids in the future and he said, "Just so you know, I've always wanted to paternity test any kids I have" I'd be like, okay, sure. Bringing it up after I'm pregnant or after the kid is born seems more accusatory of me specifically.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 02:04 PM
7

Yeah, this seems like the obvious solution tbh
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 03:37 AM
3

Yeah. If the kid comes out looking nothing like him, not only will I give him my blessing for getting a paternity test, I'll pay for it myself and write him a $5000 check. That's how sure I am that's not gonna happen, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 02:23 AM
7

Not of the woman you dingus, a swab of the baby.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 01:45 AM
17

. If we are assuming the people having a couple are committed and aren't cheating then how is it hurtful to her character? I'm lost on that Because by asking for a paternity test you're bucking that assumption. You can't say "I know that you've been faithful to me but I think there's a chance you might not have been." That's a contradiction. Asking for a paternity test implies that some part of you, even if it's a teeny tiny microscopic part, thinks she may not have been faithful. There is no ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 01:38 AM
11

It's an emotional thing. When he says he wants a paternity test, that says to her there's a seed of doubt that the baby could possibly not be his, which means there's a seed of doubt that she's faithful. To a woman who's been faithful, there's no way to interpret that but as an insult to her character. He absolutely has every right to ensure his own peace of mind, but she also has the right to have feelings about it. I would recommend that any guy who wants a paternity test to do it behind his w…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 01:16 AM
9

I'd be pretty hurt. I would acquiesce, but yeah, it might damage our relationship at least temporarily because I would feel like he didn't trust me. I wouldn't assume he was cheating, but I'd assume he thought I was. Intellectually, I know that men want paternity tests for their own peace of mind and it isn't always personal or a result of doubt/distrust. But I know myself well enough to know my intellect wouldn't override my emotions in this situation. Also, I'd be surprised because he and I ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 01:04 AM
1

That's like some weird TV/movie trope. Literally no one does that.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/18 05:10 PM
9

3 out of 4 marriages fail. No, this is also wrong. Look dude I don't care if you get married, if you like the spin plates then I hope you become the greatest plate spinner the world ever saw. Just stop pulling statistics out of your ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/18 01:38 PM
12

Good thing the divorce rate is nowhere near that high.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/18 04:32 AM
2

We also knew exactly which kind of Mexicans he was talking about lol Lol yeah. My husband is Hispanic (Mexican) and he definitely looks it and has a very Hispanic name. But he is not "that kind" of Mexican. When we were apartment hunting last year he kept nixing neighborhoods because "too many Mexicans live there." He says "There's a difference between Mexicans and Messkins" 😂
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/18 03:03 AM
1

OP is over 50. Most people aren't putting it off that long.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/18 12:23 AM
1

Like I said, it's not like they can't afford it. But they're very frugal people and are working hard at building up some savings so they can buy land, retire early, send their kids to college etc. They both only recently started earning their salaries after starting from very humble beginnings, a d they're the types who have their entire financial future planned out and specific goals they want to meet. I assume when my brother says it doesn't fit into their budget he doesn't mean month-to-month…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/18 12:23 AM
1

The tutoring center being so close to me would mean I could go home, have a quick shower, rest for a bit, eat something and then go to my personal hell more at peace of mind. LOL, well, when I worked at a tutoring center serving mostly upper middle class clients I can assure you this isn't how it went for most of them. Those kids would go to school all day, some activity after school (sports, music lessons etc.), usually grab some fast food on the way to the tutoring center, have 1-2 hours of tu…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 10:51 PM
1

literally 2 minutes away from my parent's building there's a place dedicated to giving tutoring to kids graded elementary school to 12th grade. I didn't have that when I was a kid Didn't you just say your dad spent hundreds of dollars a month on a private math tutor? Just because it wasn't in a tutoring center doesn't mean you weren't getting just as good if not better quality tutoring. I used to work at one of those places and the quality of the tutoring is not that great because the tutor is f…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 10:41 PM
1

I don't know. Way shorter than 6'2 though.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 10:12 PM
2

Sounds like my husband's family. He has six siblings and all but him and one of his sisters live in the same city and they all kind of share childcare duties. We're planning on moving closer to family in the next year or two so that we can do the same when we have kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 08:34 PM
6

Yeah. My brother and sister-in-law are about to have a baby and have been looking into childcare. They both make around 100K and live in a very low cost of living area (median home value $122K.) For a full-time nanny they're looking at a couple grand a month, and only slightly less for daycare (at least for one that's worth a shit.) And that's for one kid; they plan to have another in a couple of years. They're kind of stressing out about it and moving some money around to figure out how they're…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 08:09 PM
6

Ha. Sounds charming.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 02:57 PM
22

Right. And even if your divorce(s) wasn't your fault, it still results in you being a middle-aged single person, whose dating pool consists of other middle-aged single people who all have similar baggage (divorced, widowed, kids etc.) Seems to me if you want to date as a middle-aged person you have to make your peace with the fact that you'll be dating people with histories. I'm not saying people in this situation shouldn't have standards, but be realistic about what your prospects are.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 02:07 PM
5

Probably because the ideal height for a woman is considerably shorter, and both parents' genes contribute to the child's height. It's not like every 6'2 guy is going to have a 6'2 son.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 12:40 PM
5

I agree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 01:22 AM
29

Point is you're both damaged goods. You just think she's more damaged than you are. Maybe she is, I don't know, but a twice divorced middle aged man is not exactly a catch; you're not likely to have your pick of the litter so I'm not sure what you find surprising about your dating prospects.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 01:21 AM
62

women who are not good at relationships (i.e. had been briefly married) No offense but aren't you 2x divorced? What makes you think you're in a different league from these women?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 01:02 AM
3

💃💃💃
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 12:37 AM
1

I did. Guys who go to bars are just normal guys. Some of them are good guys, some of them are not, just like anywhere else. That said I'm not sure about clubs. I never really went to clubs and from what I understand they're basically casual sex meat markets. So it might be more difficult to meet a LTR-minded guy there. You'd have better luck at a little dive bar with pool tables and live music; they draw a more laid-back crowd and are better suited for conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 06:20 PM
6

Neat.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 05:31 PM
1

This is a good way of thinking about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 02:47 PM
4

He already said those don't count because the women aren't working hard enough. 😒
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 02:43 PM
2

Cover charge is when you have to pay to get in. I've only encountered it at bars with live music, that's how they pay the band. It's usually like $5.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 02:36 PM
8

How would you know?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 04:57 AM
6

I'd say around 20%. But idk, even when I'm not in the mood, once we start getting into it I get more enthusiastic about it. Times when I just want to get it over with and go to sleep is maybe like 5%. I've never faked an orgasm. I always get off even if I'm not that into it. Orgasms have always come really easily for me. Plus I think faking sets a bad precedent; on the rare occasion I don't have one, I can usually tell it's not going to happen and just tell my partner I want to focus on him.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 04:41 AM
2

Extremely true.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 04:30 AM
14

I've lived with enough guys to know a whole lot of them eat like shit. And the guys I know into healthy eating talk and Instagram about it at least as much as the women. MUH MACROZ
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 04:26 AM
12

I'd also add that, in my experience, women put more effort into dieting.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 04:06 AM
16

I've been going to Barre the last few weeks. I have yet to see a single guy in my class. Men and women have different bodies, thus different fitness goals, thus different workouts. What you're saying is like saying men don't put as much effort into hygiene because they take shorter showers. It doesn't make sense, you're comparing apples to oranges.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 03:59 AM
2

I'm wondering if it's just herder to get down here. I keep seeing people in this thread saying they get hydrocodone for teeth extractions or root canals; I have never heard of that happening here. Does each state set laws for how strictly regulated prescription opiates are? If so that makes sense. I'm not sure but it seems likely. I know even over-the-counter drugs are regulated differently in different states (Sudafed comes to mind; I remember when Texas cracked down on that when meth started b…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 12:41 AM
3

i’ve never liked doing them (though i know i’m in the minority). i make up for it in other ways... but we exist. Maybe I'm solipsisming a little bit. For me it's not something I love or would go out of my way to do for my own sake, but it's mild and unintrusive enough that I don't mind doing it and wouldn't take it off the table if my partner enjoys it, unlike other things that are hard no's. I feel you though. As long as everyone's happy it doesn't matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 12:30 AM
5

Essentially, creative artist/musician eccentricity vs. nerd eccentricity.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/18 11:22 PM
9

I'd agree. Blow jobs are pretty basic sexual fare. If she won't do it for you, barring major jaw surgery or something rendering her physically unable to perform one, something is up.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/18 07:50 PM
4

You can carry a girl to your bedroom, throw her down and "fuck the shit out of her" without actually physically hurting her or degrading her (slapping, anal, gagging, spitting etc. like you see in porn.) I'd need to know what "fuck the shit out of you like you're a piece of meat" entails before I answer definitively. But honestly both of those sound pretty nice to me, depending on what mood I'm in. I think that's true for most women. Both scenarios you described also seem to fall into the "in be…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/18 07:07 PM
4

Nonsense! There is only once a year vanilla missionary with the lights off, or total degenerate no-holds-barred degrading painful BDSM. No in between.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/18 06:50 PM
3

This. Meth was the big thing where I grew up and still is. In 2009 a huge meth ring affiliated with the Bandidos was busted in my hometown and there were even some sheriff's deputies involved. It was insane. I have so many high school classmates in jail for cooking and selling meth, from that and subsequent busts. I've not heard much about opiates being a problem in that area. I did hear about one guy I know who's apparently a homeless addict now, but he doesn't live in Texas anymore. From what …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/18 02:45 PM
2

This is so crazy to me. I believe you but I wonder if it's a regional thing or something. I have had a shit ton of dental work over the past few years including extractions, root canals and a soft tissue graft and I've never been given anything stronger than ibuprofen. And that's from three different dentists. The only time I got hydrocodone was when I had my wisdom teeth out, and even then it was only like six pills.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/18 02:19 PM
2

I had a root canal a month ago and they just prescribed me high dose ibuprofen. Maybe state laws vary or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/18 02:14 PM
6

Turn it up a bit so it's more aligned with my husband's and so I spontaneously crave sex more frequently. Technically I could do that now by going off hormonal birth control, but it's not worth the trade-offs at the moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/18 11:15 PM
3

hahahahaha <3
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/18 07:19 PM
5

I think this is just a fundamental disagreement we're having. I think partners should stick up for one another, always. Deal with your shit in private but don't let other people get away with thinking or speaking poorly of your spouse. That's just a personal value of mine though. I see where you're coming from.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 09:02 PM
4

Regardless of what it is, even if it's valid criticism, letting it happen without defending your wife is not showing kindness to her. I maintain that showing kindness to your wife in this situation would be to defend your wife to others and confronting her in private. What will "help" isn't necessarily what is kind. You seem to be approaching this with the assumption that information is valuable to you in some way, which is fair, but to call it a kindness to your wife is a stretch.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 08:35 PM
6

The kind thing to do would be to shut them down and talk to her about it privately.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 08:04 PM
13

Those aren't kind men, those are weak men. The man who would sit in silence and let people talk shit about his wife certainly isn't being kind to his wife, is he?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 07:10 PM
7

Not in my world. In THE world (or at least in the US.) There are statistics about these things. But I'm willing to believe that's mostly what you see where you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 06:34 PM
5

The typical woman who's had an abortion ... [is] the woman in her mid 20s who took the day off from her PR or Big Law job, to "get this taken care of". It's the 30-something married woman who is paying cash because she doesn't want to put it through insurance because she doesn't want hubs to find out. No, the typical woman having an abortion is a low-income unmarried Hispanic woman who already has one or more children.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 06:31 PM
6

Every woman can get a "nice good man". This is just mathematically incorrect. Unless you mean to imply that every man on earth is a "nice good man," it is impossible for every woman to end up with a nice good man. Some of them are going to end up with losers or alone. Usually trashy loser women end up with trashy loser men because that's all either one of them have access to.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 06:20 PM
1

I don't think there's a lot of status in getting married and divorced every few years but you do you I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 12:57 PM
1

Ok, but I'm not asking why you want a wife instead of a bunch of ONSs, I'm asking why you want a wife instead of a live-in girlfriend. You don't want kids and you want to get rid of the girl after a few years. Seems like a lot of hassle to keep getting married and divorced when you could just get a girlfriend, cohabitate and let the relationship run its course.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 12:46 PM
15

Very true.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 03:11 AM
1

💯
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 02:03 AM
2

This is an excellent comment, Smurfy. You've inspired me to write an OP tomorrow.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 11:38 PM
2

So why do you even want a wife? Why not just cycle through girlfriends?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 09:43 PM
8

You think it's literally impossible to avoid raising another man's kid?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 09:31 PM
4

Lol, yeah. I think the moral of the story is it's best not to think in extremes.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 09:18 PM
8

Yeah, I think a lot of this is male projection. Of course some women cheat, but I think they discount the number of women who reach a certain age and just don't care that much about sex anymore period.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 08:54 PM
0

Haha, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 01:56 PM
2

Rap is a much newer genre. Eventually it will fall out of vogue and be replaced with something else too.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 01:34 PM
2

Yeah I agree, Facebook is way worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 01:48 AM
3

My understanding is that the men who seek out cuckold porn are usually putting themselves in the place of the cuckold. They get off on the humiliation. I'm sure there are those who imagine themselves as the bull too, but that's not who the genre is geared toward. Most cuckold situations IRL are initiated by the cuckolded man, too. Far be it from me to say why, but some men are into this.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 12:13 AM
5

Well the internet has ruined it and now it must go. This is why we can't have nice things.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 11:58 PM
2

Uh no, I don't think that's right.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 11:57 PM
3

Fuck you bot, it's called poetic licence
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 11:55 PM
16

You don't get enough appreciation for possibly being the most even-keeled and rational person on this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 11:53 PM
15

the fat woman problem is broader heh heh
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 04:11 PM
9

It's literally not at all but ok
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:45 PM
6

No, you're right.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:41 PM
3

Tell that to the person saying Facebook is exempt for some reason. I agree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:39 PM
10

I don't hear much from either of these groups in real life tbh. Also, there is a regular BP contributor here who complains endlessly about how they are unattractive and gave their youth away to ugly beta men. Their complaints are akin to incel lookism. How is it at all akin to incel lookism? That user owns up to her own decisions being the biggest factor in her "wasted youth," and from what I've seen she doesn't claim to be unattractive. Can you explain to me the connection you're drawing here?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:33 PM
16

If you mean "here" as in "here on PPD" it's probably because fat women don't clog up the sub day and night with their ceaseless whining to the point where we had to put a moratorium on the topic. Just a guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:11 PM
1

No, all women everywhere forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:05 PM
3

This thread is fascinating. Apparently having a family that loves you is a life-ruiningly terrible fate, and the truly happy people are the ones who spend all their time talking to friends on Facebook
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 01:28 PM
2

It is where I grew up and in most rural places I'd imagine.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 01:23 PM
5

It's definitely Facebook too.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 12:32 PM
3

When all this came out my husband said "If I were him I'd be worrying about my dating life, not my career." I think he's right. I feel bad for him because it's embarrassing to have a story like that about you out there, but as celebrity scandals go, it's pretty mild. Major news publications came out defending him. Netflix is standing by him. He gave an apology that was shared by Twitter feminists with captions like "THIS is how you do an apology!" No other women came forward with stories, as hap…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:47 AM
2

I thought he was pretty funny on Parks and Rec and I still think he was pretty funny on Parks and Rec.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 03:38 AM
5

Why do people keep saying this? His Netflix show wasn't even canceled.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/18 02:14 AM
2

My grandpa was one of those super fit 80-somethings, until he wasn't. Then it was on his family to care for him and eventually pay for his round-the-clock care. People don't live forever. Everyone is going to be old and infirm someday, that's just life. If you're lucky you get to die of a sudden heart attack, but for most people it's a process.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 11:58 PM
4

Ha, this sounds a lot like my grandfather. After he had a stroke, he lived at home for about a year, with my mom, dad and grandmother helping to care for him. Eventually it just wasn't possible -- he was a big guy, and getting him out of bed was a struggle, especially when he was in a confused, stubborn mood. We were afraid he might hurt my grandma somehow. So he went into a home and he took to that like a fish to water. He got to flirt with the pretty young nurses and watch John Wayne movies to…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 11:49 PM
1

Eh I disagree. From my experience and that of most of my friends, keeping weight off really became a struggle around 26. You really have to work a lot harder to keep your figure after your mid twenties. This is especially true if you have kids. As far as just aging goes though, I agree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 11:05 PM
14

Varies from woman to woman, but generally I think 21-23 is the sweet spot. They're more filled out and have clearer skin and are better at makeup/hair/clothes etc. than teenagers, and they've not yet begun to show signs of aging or a slower metabolism.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 10:12 PM
8

Except once your friends emerge out of the "busy child raising years," they're in their "busy grandkid years," or their "busy retirement and traveling years," or their "busy my wife is dying of cancer years." I'm not denying that technology has made it easier to keep up with old friends. But keeping in touch with a friend and having someone there to pick you up off the floor when you've fallen and broken a hip and nurse you through the subsequent recovery are two very different things. I think p…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 07:35 PM
7

So you think people will lose friends at 35-45, but somehow magically have friends when they're 65-80?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 06:50 PM
3

Maybe you guys should just elope? I had a friend in this situation, they wanted to get married for practical reasons but excited family members kept trying to make it into a whole "thing." So they just took what everyone thought was a vacation, got married while they were gone, then came back like "Hey guess what, we're married" and went back to life as usual.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 06:47 PM
6

💯
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 05:53 PM
2

Unbelievable.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 05:12 PM
2

CJ gave me a kitten calendar and a box of Walgreens chocolates the first year we were going out, and it was more because I was having a bad day than a Valentine's gift. (I was a high school teacher at the time, and Valentine's Day is second only to Halloween in terms of teenagers acting like fucking maniacs.) I haven't received a Valentine's gift since then. Maybe this year I'll buy him some socks or something to make up for the $7 he spent on me in 2012.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 04:30 PM
2

Are all of the mods "creeps" or just mads? Why did you feel the need to call her out specifically?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/18 03:34 AM
3

"Doesn't count as infidelity" according to who?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/18 08:45 PM
3

Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/18 01:13 AM
0

I knew a couple of Chads growing up and have one in my family. It seems to be a pretty popular name in Texas for some reason. I always thought it was an objectively ugly-sounding name, long before reddit or TRP colored my view of it. So I never would have named a son Chad, and I certainly wouldn't now that it's become a meme.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/18 09:34 PM
1

Maybe I have hair solipsism lol. My hair is weird, it's very very straight, thick but fine, and frizzy. If I go to sleep with it wet or just let it air-dry it looks like absolute shit (frizzy, messy and kind of dirty?) and there's nothing to be done about it. I have to blow-dry it, which because of how thick it is and the humid climate I live in takes a long time. I've had short hair too, and while it was higher maintenance in other ways (more frequent cuts, more products, more fighting to get i…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 11:44 PM
2

Yeah, it's crazy. My best friend had out of control spiral curly hair until she got pregnant with her first, at which point her hair became baby-fine and frizzy/wavy but lost its tight curl. I had no idea that was a thing that could happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 10:27 PM
2

Hmm. Most of the lesbians I know with short hair have buzzcuts or something similar, literally just male haircuts on a woman. Straight women usually get a more feminine pixie cut with softer edges, bangs etc. YMMV tho.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 10:10 PM
9

Probably a mix of both. They keep their hair long when they're young as part of the whole "young and hot" attractiveness package; this also includes staying thin, wearing makeup etc. So yes, I think they're partially doing it to attract guys. But also, as you alluded to, long hair is very high maintenance. Washing, blowdrying, styling, conditioning treatments, etc. are all time consuming and costly. As you get busy with kids, career, and other adult obligations, you have less time to spend on ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 08:21 PM
3

And statistically a "single mother" is just an unwed mother. Plenty of "single mothers" still have the dad present at the hospital when the baby is born and put him on the birth certificate immediately.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 04:53 PM
3

My husband is uncircumcised and it doesn't bother him (or me.) But one time we were hanging out with some guy friends and, as guys do, they started talking about their junk and he casually mentioned being uncircumcised. The other two guys were visibly disgusted and weirded out when he mentioned it, and later when I was alone with one of them he was like "Isn't that weird? Do you ever think about asking him to get circumcised?" I was like "What the fuck, no." I'll never be convinced this is somet…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 04:47 PM
8

quivers in fear
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 02:33 PM
2

Dishwashers don't always get off food that's stuck to the dish, that's why you pre-wash. My husband has the "just stick it in the dishwasher" philosophy too so I often have to go back and scrape "clean" dishes with steel wool because food the was still on the dish has now been caked on by the dishwasher.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 01:24 PM
1

Right! So gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 01:13 PM
3

Oh I know. I love them to death.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 01:09 PM
10

This is a pretty mild example but I think it fits with what you're talking about. I grew up with two older brothers who teased me relentlessly. They made fun of EVERYTHING I did: how I chewed my food, how I held my pen, how I pronounced certain words, how I was built, etc etc. They aggravated me so much, but they were also my heroes and deep down I thought they were hilarious. As a result, I have trouble feeling loved by a guy who doesn't tease me a bit. Not straight up mockery and verbal abuse,…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/18 01:38 AM
1

I think it was actually you who talked me into getting a Roomba several months ago. Those things really are a godsend with pets. We have a chow and a Maine Coon cat and the hair is just neverending. I still run the regular vacuum once a week and clean the furniture with the hand vac, but the Roomba has been a huge help day to day.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 11:16 PM
5

Exactly! And I think him showing so much gratitude towards the things I do for him makes me take more notice of the things he does for me and express gratitude toward him too. So it's just a continuous cycle of gratitude and love and good feelz. I think a lot of people on these subs (and maybe understandably, given their histories of being burned) are terrified of being the person giving more than they're getting, even if that "more" is literally just nice words. And when both people have that m…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 11:02 PM
9

Yardwork is not the endless daily task that laundry, cooking and cleaning are. And many people don't even have yards. Plus, with housework, the people living in the house are creating MORE work for you, which contributes to the feeling of being taken for granted. Yardwork is a task independent of the people who live in the house or their habits; a single person's yard will require just as much maintenance as a family with five kids. That's not true of housework which increases exponentially with…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 10:32 PM
10

I never said it wasn't. This thread is about house cleaning.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 09:33 PM
4

Re: your first paragraph, cigarette smoke building up like that is a huge irritant for a lot of people with allergies. I grew up in a house with smokers and my entire childhood was a literal neverending headache because of it. Washing it off the walls every few months is completely reasonable, no different than dusting, changing out air filters etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 09:21 PM
7

Yes! This is exactly how we are. Constantly thanking each other for little things, even things that they would be doing regardless, because hey if they're doing it that means I don't have to. and when i do get a little annoyed that it feels like i'm the only one running around and cleaning the house, even just an acknowledgment/thanks or a "can i do anything to help?" goes a long way. i don't usually take him up on his offer if i'm mid-task, but it makes a difference. Yes, I so relate to this. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 09:17 PM
16

I don't think most people argue that housework is "hard"; it obviously isn't. But it is time-consuming and thankless, and that can start to get to you when you're doing it for a whole family. Also there's the fact that, unlike regular jobs, you don't "get off" from housework and childrearing. Honest to God I think a lot of this could be solved by husbands acknowledging and thanking their wives for what they do. I do most of the work around the house, and I don't mind it, because even though we w…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 09:02 PM
1

I grew up near an air force base and a lot of girls I knew ended up marrying guys who work in aviation. So... move near an air force base I guess? Haha.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 08:56 PM
11

Yeah, and those "chickenshit jobs" are often a lot more physically taxing and offer less time off and flexibility than most "careers," so I'm not sure what your point is. They're still not staying home raising the kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 03:43 PM
14

I married into a hispanic family. All the women work. I'm not sure where you're getting that hispanic families are all traditional with SAHMs. I agree that they have strong family ties, but having lived around hispanic people my whole life, I knew very few families where the mom didn't work.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 03:36 PM
13

The sex wouldn't be great, that's what you're missing. Sex for women isn't just "insert tab A into slot B." We need mental stimulation, sexual tension and to feel desired. Going to a prostitute would be an activity unsexy situation for most women, so the sex wouldn't be good no matter how technically proficient the guy was.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/18 12:06 AM
3

This exchange has been... interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/18 10:28 PM
3

There is a difference between putting their needs first versus taking their needs into consideration and making decisions based on what the husband deems best for the family. Making decisions based on what's best for the family is putting their needs first. He's considering the entire family's needs, not just his own. A husband who puts his own needs first to the detriment of his wife and family is not a Christian husband, or at least not leading his family the way God instructed him to do. Whil…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/18 07:38 PM
2

So what? I was a high school teacher in an urban school district and I had ACTUAL 20-year-old students. I was somehow able to control myself. I have no sympathy for those who can't.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/18 04:13 PM
6

The man is the authority in Christian marriage, but he is also the protector, and as the leader of the family his responsibility is to their needs before his own. Husbands are instructed to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Christ was the indisputable leader and head of the church, but he also gave his life for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/18 03:52 PM
10

In more general terms, "dating" basically just means "in an exclusive romantic/sexual relationship, but not married or engaged." An actual date is when two people go out to dinner, a movie, coffee or other activity with the mutual understanding that they're vetting each other as relationship/sexual prospects. Personally I never really went on "dates." My relationships formed more organically; I met guys through my social circle, hung out with them at parties etc. which eventually led to hooking …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/18 02:27 AM
3

This particular teacher got ten years which is fine with me. Apparently "society" didn't fall for her act.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 10:31 PM
4

If she can't use her conscious mind to overcome her unconscious libido she shouldn't be let out of the house, let alone near children.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 09:16 PM
10

I've worked in education for 10 years and have worked with teens in inner city urban schools, affluent white suburbs and even in an elite Christian school. ALL teenagers are assholes to some extent, even the ones who are generally sweet and polite. Their brains are still developing, their hormones are going crazy, they are testing boundaries and questioning authority and that often manifests as defiant, rude behavior. It isn't their fault, and it isn't a problem; it's the adult's responsibility …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 09:14 PM
3

Yes, if she knows that about herself then she should not work in that kind of environment. That's just asking for trouble, especially since counselors often find themselves one-on-one with kids discussing sensitive subjects.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 06:47 PM
3

What's more is that apparently she repeatedly told him to stop his advances, but they continued and she didn't discipline him/get administration involved? BS, she didn't get them involved because she wasn't actually worried, she was excited. My gf was a young, attractive teacher for this age group and the way she'd handle this is just so different, because she's not a terrible teacher or a fucking pedophile. This exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 04:34 PM
15

Her defense is that she couldn't help herself to the seductive powers of a 13 year old boy. In which case, as I said, she's an idiot who sucks at her job and deserves to be in jail. Sucks to be her.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 03:55 PM
23

This is a topic that gets under my skin like no other. I work in education and I've dealt with every kind of asshole kid you can imagine, including ones that tried to """"""seduce"""""" me. If you have half a brain and a sense of professional ethics it is extremely, stupidly easy not to cross the line into inappropriate territory, let alone to not fuck a student. It makes me ragey when I see teachers in these situations acting like helpless victims who fell prey to the wiles of a 13-year-old. Gi…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 03:44 PM
11

Rude implying that he was sexually inappropriate AND offensive. Yes, that's how 13-year-old boys are. I was a high school teacher for three years; my first year teaching some of my students were as little as three years younger than me. I had boys try to "flirt" with me, ask for my number/Instagram/Facebook, tell me I looked hot, etc. etc. You treat it like any other disciplinary infraction because that's what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 03:39 PM
21

A student being rude to a teacher isn't "negging." That's how kids act, they're rude asshole jerks, especially at that age. If a student being rude to you is a blow to your self esteem you're in the wrong profession. If she couldn't get a handle on his behavior through classroom management she should have taken it to administration or had the kid removed from her class. When a student doesn't show up and you're worried about them, you call their parents. You don't DM them on Instagram. Teachers …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 03:01 PM
4

I have a few random questions There's someone here with blue flair that reads "It angers me that women like her exist". What's the story behind that? Lol, that was me (I changed my flair a couple days ago.) A user I've butted heads with a number of times here was airing his grievances about me in a recent thread and said "It angers me that people like her exist." I just thought it would be funny to make that ringing endorsement my flair for a while.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/18 03:51 AM
2

I thoroughly disagree. If you can't live with a person how they are now, you shouldn't marry them, period. It's foolish to hang your happiness for the rest of your life on the hope that a person changes for the better, no matter how many promises they make.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/18 06:22 PM
6

Probably not. I'd have a lot of trouble with jealousy I think, knowing he shares a child with someone else. It would be tough for me. But if I met the right person I might be able to get past it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/18 04:34 PM
15

Men willing to change are not good husbands? No, the idea is you don't marry a guy based on what you hope he becomes someday, you marry who he is now. So many women marry a guy thinking "Well, he's a little immature now [or he has a bit of a drinking problem, or he's not that attractive, or he has habits that irritate me, or fill in the blank], but once we get married, things will be different." This advice is intend to protect against that.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/18 08:32 PM
1

Not really. We wouldn't be talking the whole time, I'd just have an earbud in and let him know when I got on the bus.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/18 05:29 AM
2

Is it really though?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/18 01:32 AM
6

When I was taking night classes my husband made me call him while I walked from my building to the bus stop after class. It was like a 10 minute walk but he didn't like me walking around campus alone at night.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/18 01:27 AM
8

Wait, are you saying this isn't a 100% sincere thread written by a sensitive guy feeling conflicted after an unfulfilling sexual encounter??? But it seemed so genuine...
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/18 12:58 AM
2

I don't know what thread you're talking about so I guess not. What's so bad about a woman exercising caution around a strange man? You realize it's not personal, right? She doesn't know you. Of course you know you're not a rapist or a murderer, but she doesn't know that, and her instincts tell her that being alone at night with an unrelated man is bad news, so she hurried to get somewhere safe. When you said "Boo" to her, that tells her that you recognized her fear and vulnerability and think it…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/18 12:25 AM
3

Right? I feel like guys do this thinking "ha ha, I sure showed her!" but all they're doing is reinforcing that women should be scared because men will do weird, unpredictable shit (and, apparently, delight in doing it.)
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 11:10 PM
2

Something about the isolation scares me much more than the crime statistics. Ugh, yes. I grew up in the TX panhandle in a rural area. My parents' house is across from a cotton field and it's just nothing but flat for miles and miles and it's dead silent at night. When I still lived at home I had to park my car a little ways from the house, and I would haul ass from my car to the front door because it creeped me out so much. It doesn't help that my brother swears to this day that he saw a UFO lan…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 10:57 PM
9

I don't think anyone but a few fringe crazies denies the physical difference between men and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 10:21 PM
4

Don't you talk all the time about how you're a big imposing scary criminal? Why wouldn't they be freaked out by you?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 10:21 PM
14

I don't think it's strange, I understand the sentiment, but it's not realistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 10:19 PM
28

I live in one of the safest neighborhoods in one of the safest cities in the US. There hasn't been a violent crime in my neighborhood in over a year. Yes, I still feel unsafe walking at night. I'm not walking around terrified that I could die at any moment, but my senses are heightened and I'm on alert for any danger. I look over my shoulder occasionally, I don't walk with headphones on, etc. Basic situational awareness. This isn't because of politicians or the media or any other propaganda conv…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 09:37 PM
7

neoteny is intelligence So women are smarter than men?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 03:34 PM
1

Most apartments where I live won't rent to great dane owners. This is also something single people have to consider if they rent - make sure your dog isn't a restricted breed. (My husband and I adopted a chow mix not knowing they were a restricted breed at most places, and finding housing that will let us have her has been a bitch.)
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 04:09 AM
3

Even working 8-5, assuming you have a 30 minute commute, that's ten hours a day the dog is home alone. Add running errands before and after work, social life, etc. and that dog is being neglected a lot. Like I said in another comment, if you have a yard and a dog door or if you have multiple dogs it isn't really a big deal. But way too many people who don't have those accommodations get dogs they don't have time for and get working or sporting dogs because they're "cool" and "smart" without real…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 04:05 AM
3

Well yeah if you have a yard and they can go in and out while you're away that's different. I'm thinking more about the young professionals I know who live in apartments and leave their poor dogs in crates for 10 hours a day. It makes me sad.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 03:20 AM
6

I was going to say the same thing. I get irritated with people who adopt dogs as companions and leave them at home alone all day. If you don't have the time to keep the dog entertained and give it enough exercise, and/or the money to pay for a dog walker or doggy day care, you shouldn't get a dog. Cats are a little different, they don't really mind being home alone all day. But dogs are very social and need a lot of exercise and mental stimulation.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/18 02:31 AM
1

Same.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 10:31 PM
1

Yeah pretty much. I mean it's not like I avoid thinking about it because it's uncomfortable for me, it's just not a framework I've ever considered until I started posting here.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 09:57 PM
3

It doesn't have negative connotations for me, it's just not the way I've ever thought about things. I know it's useful for other people and that's fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 09:49 PM
1

Nah if anything my husband has the power. I'm a complete doormat. I just don't think of it in those terms because it doesn't feel like a power struggle, I'm a naturally yielding person so it just feels normal to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 09:32 PM
2

I have the same problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 07:42 PM
14

Yeah, this is my thinking too. I just don't relate to this "power" framework, I've never found it useful or relevant in my relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 05:30 PM
4

Right, I don't doubt that at all and I don't blame men for it. (I'm one of the few women who have to interest in "career men" and wouldn't want to date or marry one, so, I get it.) I'm just saying, even if the woman doesn't label herself a "career woman" as such, just by virtue of working and socializing in a professional environment, she's going to meet more professional, educated men. This PPD meme that men with good careers are marrying waitresses and community college grads just doesn't refl…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 03:50 PM
2

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 03:33 PM
1

Most jobs that require a man to wear a three-piece suit wouldn't be okay with a woman just wearing a simple summer dress. She'd have to wear something like a pencil skirt with heels and a blazer. Which would still probably be cooler, but uncomfortable for other reasons (especially if she had to wear panty hose, ugh.)
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 02:30 PM
2

You don't have to work with them. People's social circles tend to consist of people on roughly the same level. Professionals socialize with professionals. A woman with an education and decent career is going to have more social access to quality men than a waitress or CVS cashier.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 02:20 PM
8

Yes it does because it puts them in proximity to those men. Their chance is 0% if they never meet the guy in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 05:52 AM
3

lol I really do! I'm like a toddler when I get hungry. It can't be ignored.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 01:20 AM
4

They're not painful per se, but they're not comfortable. You're constantly aware that you're wearing one. (inb4 the bra evangelists start raining down upon me. Yes I've been to r/abrathatfits, I know how to measure myself, I'm a 32F and buy the fancy expensive bras. They're better. They're still not comfortable.)
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 01:19 AM
7

I can't relate to this at all. I get so hungry sometimes that I can't concentrate, and I start to get headaches and cramps if I go too long without eating or drinking. Emotions definitely manifest physically for me too -- stress in the shoulders, fear and anxiety in the bowels, anger in the chest and head, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 01:17 AM
7

Women's clothing is extremely uncomfortable (at least if you want to be fashionable.) It's expected to be form-fitting so it's constricting, a lot of the fabric doesn't breathe, a lot of it is sheer so you have to wear layers (which is hot.) Not to mention the medieval torture devices that are bras and high heels. (Of course, not wearing a bra is also severely uncomfortable so we're fucked either way on that one.) That said, I do think OP is reaching a bit.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 01:09 AM
5

Yeah. It was actually a female friend (one who reminds me a lot of Atlas actually, lol) who broke me of this years ago. I was upset about something or other with my boyfriend at the time and whining to her, "Why is he like this, why won't he do X, blah blah." And she was like, "Um, have you TOLD him you want him to do X? He's not going to just know, and it's not because he doesn't love you it's because he's a guy. You have to tell guys shit." My husband is very direct, and passivity really annoy…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 12:58 AM
4

Well, I mean, it is. It's more romantic for a guy to show up on your doorstep unannounced with a dozen roses than if you have to tell him "Hey, it'd be nice if you bought me flowers once in a while." Just like it's more romantic (slash sexier) to come home to your girl handing you a beer before she drops to her knees and blows you, rather than having to schedule sex around kids and work and life obligations. Notions of romance are often highly unrealistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 11:54 PM
7

Well, yeah, that's kind of my point. The idea is "If I have to tell them to do it then it doesn't count!" At the end of the day it's on the person with that mindset to get over it; they're creating their own resentment. I actually read an interesting bit of advice about this on r/askwomen of all places. Someone said, instead of thinking "I shouldn't have to ask them to do this," think "I'm glad I have someone who cares enough about me to give me help when I ask for it." I think that's a much hea…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 10:51 PM
11

"Expecting them to read your mind" is a bit of a glib way to put it (and yes I realize I used that phrasing in my comment.) It's more like you think everyone notices and prioritizes the same things you do, and gives and receives love in the same way you do. So when they don't do what you want or expect them to do you take it as a personal slight rather than recognizing it as a difference in approach and priorities. It is a self-centered way of thinking but I'm not sure it's worthy of pathologizi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 10:16 PM
3

Yeah I get that. I was more just using her comment as a springboard for this thought I had. "She gave him a BJ but didn't want to fuck him?!?!" is a sentiment I've seen expressed many times outside of this thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 10:10 PM
5

What? Yes they do. I don’t understand this assumption that accepting or performing oral means you want to have sex. Have you never just fooled around with someone without having sex? It just occurred to me that this might be the huge disconnect that makes men and women "count" different things as sex. (This always comes up here in "n count" discussions; the men tend to count a woman interacting with a penis in any way as "sex" while women tend to only count PiV.) I think men don't recognize the …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 09:48 PM
1

How does that work with men's love of lesbian (or "lesbian") porn though? That's a clear case of enjoying the view rather than imagining themselves as one of the participants. Well that's what I'm saying. I think a lot of women enjoy porn (particularly lesbian porn) in a voyeuristic sense. They aren't necessarily imagining themselves as either of the women, they just see a sexy scenario taking place and they are aroused by that. But yes, some women do imagining themselves being on the receiving …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 08:36 PM
10

I'm not sure you understand exactly what I'm saying. Obviously women know and care about the cleanliness of the house, and obviously men should maintain a basic level of cleanliness. Where she's wrong is expecting her boyfriend who she shares a house with to "just get" that the dishes are his responsibility, or that him doing them will alleviate her stress, or that she expects him to do the dishes for X reason, when she has voiced none of those things. What you're talking about is bringing a gir…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 08:20 PM
6

Well yeah if I see scissoring or dildo-sucking that's an instant turnoff because it's stupid and doesn't accurately depict what women get off to IRL. I'm not saying there isn't a lot of unsexy lesbian porn out there, it' just generally less unsexy than straight porn IMO. (But this is pretty much why I don't like porn in general, so much of it is unappealing or actively unsexy.)
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 07:28 PM
5

I wasn't meaning to conflate those two things. For me personally it's both -- the acts depicted in a lot of straight porn don't appeal to me IRL or on screen, and I'm not convinced the woman is receiving pleasure so I can't enjoy it in a voyeuristic sense either. These are two separate issues but I think one or both explain why a lot of women prefer lesbian porn over straight porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 07:24 PM
6

Not really the point. Enjoying something IRL and getting turned on watching it aren't necessarily the same (especially, again, because women don't generally self-insert when watching porn.) For a tame example I love giving BJs and find it really sexy IRL, but I find them absolutely repulsive on screen.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 07:12 PM
6

I'm just speaking generally. I know you can find any appealing niche if you search hard enough. But if I go to the front page of pornhub and click on the first straight and lesbian videos I see, the straight video is far more likely to include awkward positions, slapping/spanking, degrading language, anal, etc. In other words, it's much more likely to appeal to male tastes. The lesbian video, even if it's on the "rougher" side, will still generally include sex acts, body language and aesthetics …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 07:11 PM
6

This is pretty spot-on.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 07:03 PM
4

I mean I don't watch porn that often but I wasn't watching any a decade ago. Is it not true as a general rule that straight porn usually contains more degrading acts and rougher sex than lesbian porn? I've certainly found that to be the case. Granted there is "female friendly" straight porn, but the fact that that's even a genre is kind of a clue that mainstream straight porn is not all that appealing to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 07:00 PM
32

It's just not in some people's nature to be assertive and communicate directly. This is especially true of women, and especially of xSFx women if you want to get into the MBTI side of things. This is something I've really struggled with in my relationships (and not just my romantic relationships -- friendships, family, work relationships, every area of life.) When I'm assertive, I think I'm being bossy, stepping on toes, being mean and selfish. I don't like to feel like an imposition, so I just …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:58 PM
2

hahahaha
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:47 PM
16

What non bi women would enjoy lesbian porn more than watching a girl get railed? Me. Watching a "girl get railed" in most porn is watching a woman in positions that are unappealing if not painful IRL and pretending to enjoy it. It's not arousing, and it's not meant to be arousing to women. Lesbian porn has a lot more kissing, caressing, cunnilingus etc. which are all more arousing as a woman. I'm not remotely sexually attracted to women, but it's still more appealing to watch two people who seem…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:35 PM
19

Because they're women and I'm a straight woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:25 PM
19

I'm not repulsed by lesbian sex per se, but the idea of interacting with another woman sexually is thoroughly unappealing. I just don't find women sexually attractive and I don't like the idea of sexually acting on or being acted upon by a woman. Women are pretty, I can appreciate them aesthetically, but they don't turn me on.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:09 PM
4

Excellent comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 05:18 PM
3

Me either, I have literally never seen this happen (or seen a woman complaining about it happening) ever in my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 02:18 PM
12

When I'm god emperor men will be forced to marry fat single mother sex robots.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 02:16 PM
1

I mean yeah, they should. If they have half a brain as a parent they shouldn't let just any dude be around their kid, that's what gets kids molested and murdered. Single parents should be the pickiest people on the planet when it comes to dating. I'm not disagreeing that they shouldn't have gotten knocked up in the first place, but what's done is done, and now that there's a kid in the picture they damn well better be selective about who they bring into that kid's life. That doesn't mean any man…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 01:53 PM
3

In the south it would be a great big ol' lasagna.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 01:25 PM
3

Ok, good for you. I've not found it to be a great metric. I can go to concerts and watch TV by myself or with friends who like the same things I do. When it comes to sharing my life with someone I'd rather make sure we're compatible on things like family, religion, finances, life goals etc. than pop culture preferences. No offense but aren't you twice or thrice divorced? It doesn't seem this screening process has worked out all that well for you. Also, I love Friends, and pre-9/11 Toby Keith was…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 01:21 PM
3

No he doesn't play, but his best friend and roommate were in bands together and he went to a lot of shows. His roommate was a friend of mine from high school so that's how we met. Lol @ that pic
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 04:47 AM
2

No, I started running with that crowd after this guy and I broke up. That scene is where I met my husband. And yeah I like a little bit of everything when it comes to music and a lot of it is objectively terrible. Lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 04:18 AM
3

For whatever reason my freshman year of college I became obsessed with the Police. And my ex was obsessed with Phil Collins. The Smiths, the Cure, Souxsie and the Banshees, Fine Young Cannibals, Depeche Mode... I guess not that "weird" but it was just a random phase we were both going through when we met, and we basically listened to nothing but 80s music the entire two years we were together.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 03:48 AM
3

Yeah, his body grosses me out. But his face is way more attractive to me than the other guy's, and I think he has the more attractive build in terms of raw ratios. I just hate the slick hairless look, ugh, whyyyyy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 01:10 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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