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GoofBallz913 Archive

View 0 posts and 20 comments by GoofBallz913 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Awesome! Yeah, sounds like keeping that great interest rate would be the biggest win.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 05:37 PM
2

I did a cash out. Would a Heloc remove her from the title/mortgage going forward? I'm uncertain, just an important detail to clarify. The re-fi did both of those in my expereince.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 03:56 PM
5

My cheating ex had moved on from from her first affair partner to a "boyfriend" before our divorce was final. I met a woman some time after that. I get a text from my ex of my now GFs car in my driveway overnight (I kept the house) from my neighbors doorbell cam with a message "looks like you're having fun." Ex drops various jabs and questions if I'm dating over the next few days, which I refuse to respond to. She finally cracks and begs me to try working on things with her and drops my favorite…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 08:54 PM
2

Has either side officially filed? Will vary by location, but where I am located, the person who files can easily get "Ex parte temporary orders" ex parte meaning one side only. I was advised to file first, blocking my then-wife from this possibility.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 08:05 PM
10

Briefly...my ex dated a guy whose ex started interfering (like she-- my ex did so thoroughly when I started dating.) She apologized in sort of a "getting taste of my own medicine mea culpa. That lasted right up until that guy dumped her saying she was too much to deal with. Meanwhile, I've had the same partner over 4 years now, no apologies needed.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 12:26 AM
2

Understood man, not trying to be hard on you. You got this!
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 04:28 PM
11

Put the divorce behind you and move on. No matter how much "She deserves it" it's clearly still eating at you. Focus your energy on making the changes needed so your son can have equal time with you. Kids need 2 healthy parents, and you can only control your side in that equation.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 04:14 PM
4

Agree with this comment, why would an actual appraisal not be the source of truth? In my case, some anticipated costs like closing fees were deducted from the value and thus the equity was split accordingly. I stayed in the house and did a cash-out refinance, where the new lender wrote a check to her for her portion of the equity.
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/23 05:07 PM
2

I was in a similar situation and received the same advice. As I understood it, the person filing can make certain requests like staying in the house, time with kids, etc. Until contested, those orders will be in place. In my case, I was advised do so as sort of a defense against being forced to leave the house. I ultimately did not file first and thankfully dodged most of that mess, but it's very much a possibility. Regarding lawyers, I did MANY free consultations to find a lawyer, and in doing …
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 07:46 PM
1

Since some here appear to think I am a complete idiot for this, let me explain my scenario and why I deemed this necessary. And to clarify, yes, this is only required when needing childcare more than 4 hrs. As I alluded to, my ex threatened to move across country with our child at the first chance she gets. Despite her having plenty of family in our current location, she often needs coverage for no school days, occasional work conflicts, etc. I note all of these instances so that in the case she…
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 02:15 PM
7

I would suggest "right of first refusal." That is, if the parent responsible at a given time needs to find childcare, they must first offer the other parent that time with the child. In my case, I fear she may try to move away with our kid, so having record of times she needed me to cover for her will be great evidence of why the kid needs to stay near me. Without this, the ex could find a sitter (family or otherwise) without telling or offering me the extra time.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 05:54 PM
12

Exactly this! This "live your best life, you do you, you deserve to be happy" lie some groups of women feed on and blast all over social media to each other. And yes, mine came running back and begging to make up. Turns out, I had found a better way of living my best life by then , and it didn't include her!
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/23 03:08 PM
3

Yes! She cheated in horrific fashion, flying cross country to meet a HS classmate while I stayed home with our kid. Filed for divorce sometime after returning, but wouldn't move out and went out most weekends. Watched her phone blow up with new numbers, tracked the phone bill to see THOUSANDS of text messages each month. Seemed to land with one guy before finally agreeing to separate (I tried making it work for months of this before finally hitting rock bottom and couldn't witness anymore.) Once…
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/22 03:29 AM
3

Wow, when did you meet my ex??
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/22 05:23 AM
2

Sounds like you have PLENTY of ammo to initially seek primary custody. Get that, get the kids as much as you can and make her EARN parenting time back. The ball will be in your court then as to when that is. Someone mentioned a 2/2/5 which is what I have and enjoy, some enjoy every-other week. Document when she pawns them off with her mom-- more ammo that she can't handle the time she does have. When an official parenting plan is written, include "right of first refusal." That is, if she needs c…
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/22 10:50 PM
12

I was the exact opposite of what you describe. Hanging on to every strand of hope, playing "pick me" by showering her with gifts and affections, and generally doing everything I could to make our marriage work. And then... I didn't. And I felt good. I had been controlling even the smallest thing I could-- literally drinking enough water each day. Then I started working out, then I realized I was still worth a whole lot more than she was valuing me for. (oh and when I did, she came running back. …
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/22 04:21 AM
2

Believe it will depend largely on your state. As someone mentioned already, my state specifically states spousal support will end when "the cohabitation (as defined by the then-current state law) of the maintenance recipient with a non-relative adult (regardless of gender) in a marriage-like relationship" .
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/22 02:33 PM
6

Our mediation (technically conciliation) focused ONLY on the parenting plan and custody, courts left everything else to us to decide. Perhaps mediation is different. Regarding "map out a schedule every 4 months", that sounds ridiculous and I can't imagine anyone siding with her. Why open the door to more contention every 4 months. There are tons of plans already working for people (5-2-2-5, every other week, etc.) Research those and see what fits best for you. I would guess the fact that a media…
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/22 04:02 PM
2

I'm experiencing this frequently, too. It's tricky because it's not always a smoking gun, but rather "death by a thousand cuts." Little, cutting comments about me that add up to what I can perceive as a certain attitude my daughter holds towards me. I would add-- document everything you can. I have online notes full of "<Daughter's name" told me 'Mom said you only like <GF name> because she's a contortionist.'" Many of these "mom said" moments tell the story, if I ever need to tell it.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/22 03:23 PM
10

It's good to hear (at least sounds like) you've moved on and are ready for your next phase. Can't tell if you are separated or not, but once you are, your entire mission should be to provide your kids with the very opposite example: stability, rational, and putting them above all else (not getting laid ). She'll probably come running back to you, too. Once current guy rejects her. Seeing you move on and being strong will absolutely boggle her mind.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/22 03:59 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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