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HODLMEPLS Archive

View 3 posts and 88 comments by HODLMEPLS on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Thank you all. Made it through ok
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 12:34 AM
2

The return on that $30,000 will be infinite. Spend it
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 02:46 PM
4

Guys adding to my comment. The fact that you’re even here in this sub and engaging puts you ahead of 95%. Be a gentleman with women while still expressing your interest. You will be rewarded.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 02:39 PM
5

💯 I know this post isn’t for everyone here. I grieved my marriage for a few years before I initiated and filed. That said now that I am out and about- the therapy and gym have paid off. I have women in their late 20s (I’m 44) and up flirting with me. The younger ones respect you when you do limit their nonsense - and with age comes some wisdom. I have more interest from women than I can reasonably handle.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 02:38 PM
5

Thank you. Yes I’m a sentimental one. Just tough today
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/24 05:46 PM
9

Don’t move out until you have legally settled. Her lawyer and the court can use the move out against you in custody
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/24 12:33 AM
3

This is Divorce Men… one of the first and best lessons we learn is about enforcing boundaries.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/24 01:47 AM
6

Narcissistic abandonment by her. Sorry
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 04:02 AM
6

Lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 07:22 PM
5

Workout and live your life. Get a girl if you want.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 12:39 AM
6

Congratulations on getting out without kids
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 09:02 PM
2

My ex said she would do a stomach staple after the kids (she always had weight issues). Wish she had done it. Wonder if she will do it now.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 03:30 AM
4

Don’t move out. Attorney first.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/24 07:28 PM
1

A small dosage (2.5mg to 5mg) of the right kind of CBD gummy can help!
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 10:04 PM
5

Bro I was you with the same sad sack fatty. I felt bad for her and stayed. She was also abusive etc. two kids and 15 years later I left. Run now. Trust me so many women out here for a guy who has it together. Lift weights and take care of yourself you will be back at it in no time. Also I advise therapy. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 04:41 PM
1

Walter?
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/23 04:20 AM
5

Google narcissistic personality disorder and regret it all
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 05:37 PM
2

Bro I feel for you. Get a lawyer. What state?
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/23 09:29 AM
13

She manipulated me and I felt bad for her
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/23 09:12 PM
3

/r/narcissistspouses sorry man. Get a lawyer and a good therapist.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/23 01:49 AM
3

Get a good therapist. Get a good lawyer. I found mine thru my fraternity alumni facebook page. Where in the country are you?
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/23 12:00 AM
22

You need a lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/23 02:06 PM
3

I mean what’s your math say?
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/23 12:14 AM
2

Same to you and good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 05:05 PM
2

Count your blessings she didn’t abuse you. Move on and enjoy the rest of life
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 01:36 PM
2

44M two young kids (7, 11). As the others say - take care of and value yourself and the rest will follow. Like everything else in life it is a numbers game. If you’re top 5% that means you’re 1 in 20. So if you’re looking for the right woman gotta to work thru the field to find the right one. Be honest about your time and goals. Remember that women have their emotional baggage too. The tricky thing about your situation (being younger than me) is women in your range are likely wanting their own k…
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 12:33 PM
5

Dude she out earns you. Which means you won. Lawyer can file motions to make her pay your legal fees.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/23 07:34 PM
1

Basically as long as you keep it separate accounts it should be fine.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/23 08:03 PM
1

Lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/23 11:44 AM
2

NY is one party consent. Get a hidden voice recorder pen. Make records of your wife making those suicidal threats. At the same time or immediately consult with a divorce lawyer. DM me for a NY rec. you may be able to utilize the recordings for a protective order.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/23 04:23 AM
1

Start researching Narcissistic Personality Disorder she has those traits. The need to control. The criticism. Etc. grey rock and yellow rock. Talk to a lawyer Re custody if you can get primary. Good luck stay strong.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/23 04:18 PM
6

Same man. Gave her plenty of warnings and opportunities to self correct. None happened.
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/23 08:34 PM
1

Look up narcissistic personality disorder and watch some reelz or Tik Toks
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 03:22 PM
1

She’s a serious narcissistic abuser. I’m so sorry
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 12:49 PM
-2

See if homosexuality works for you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/23 09:35 PM
58

I stayed with my fat unhappy narcissistic wife out of pity at your age and i regret it every day leave now before you have kids
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 12:34 PM
2

Don’t move out.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/23 07:35 PM
1

Keep the home. No question.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 02:31 AM
1

I’m just an American softie not a tough Aussie but my therapist helped me appreciate the value of my own needs.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/23 01:47 PM
1

Exactly.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/23 01:16 PM
5

Yup. My STBXW can’t understand why I filed or is too ashamed to tell her “friends”.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 05:17 PM
5

Yeah you can see whose wife has them on a leash.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 05:17 PM
5

Yes. As my therapist said everyone reacts differently when you tel them. There’s no “roadmap” for this part of life so people don’t know what to expect or think. I think unhappily married people either resent you for your freedoms, or project their sadness on you, or start to unload onto you and over share.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 05:16 PM
1

I did all that while married to an abusive wife.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 12:22 PM
3

Ask your lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/23 08:57 PM
5

She’s abusing you. Stay in the house. Get a pocket pen recorder device ASAP and record. NY is a one party consent state you don’t need to tell her. Start finding a lawyer ASAP. The property is “equitable distribution “ meaning basically 50/50 (with exceptions for inheritance kept in the same name). The tricky part will be custody and spousal support. Document and note the time you spend with the kids and what you do (school drop off/pickup, school trips, doctor and dentist visits etc).
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/23 03:02 PM
5

Do not escalate or name call.
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/23 03:35 PM
11

Get a pocket recording device asap. Document everything. Start talking to lawyers. If wife or step son threaten you may need to call Police and file police reports. Sorry
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/23 03:35 PM
2

Dodged a bullet. Do the divorce and move on
/r/Divorce_Men04/05/23 03:14 PM
8

Yeah man. Same. I left her after years of narcissist abuse and her refusal to grow. I’ve treated her better than she deserves. For my own conscience.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/23 05:38 PM
9

I recently filed on a narcissist and I feel so happy and relieved even tho we have barely started the process. Just not having to pretend to play the game or care about her BS “happiness “ (re: control). Having fun with my kids without her sorry sack face. Keep on !
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/23 03:19 AM
1

There were times during my marriage I fantasized about living in my car to get away from the abuser. You can do it
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/23 03:45 PM
3

NY here too. The issues will be child custody and support. Who earns more ? Etc.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/23 12:05 PM
5

Eat healthy. Lift weights. Avoid sugars.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/23 12:41 AM
1

Yes perhaps I was a bit abrupt but my therapist has been tremendously helpful. You can find a therapist who specializes in divorce and one that you feel comfortable with
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/23 03:20 PM
2

Get a therapist
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/23 11:54 AM
8

Classic narcissist
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/23 02:57 AM
11

What a slob couldn’t even take out the trash
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/23 11:19 PM
2

Not yours. An independent third party appraisal. You need one (or two) to support your argument in the negotiation
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 01:39 AM
2

In which case you won’t owe her child support so that’s a big win.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 01:38 AM
1

What’s the custody arrangement? Is she primary?
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 01:01 AM
2

So get low valuations/ business appraisals. Seems like that’s your area of expertise
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 01:00 AM
2

I’m involved in a similar situation with. 100% LLC that’s only value is service fee income. Mine also varies year to year. My attorney gave me same advice I need to buy out wife. Her attorney fortunately agreed it has little value so we won’t fight over it. What is your wives point of view?
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 12:47 AM
1

Lower your expectations
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/23 02:25 AM
4

also your child support will increase. If you’re in a no fault state look into your options
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 12:59 PM
3

Lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 11:57 PM
7

you should coordinate this with mom. tell him together, or at least have her ok to tell him
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 08:48 PM
2

My Life by Billy Joel
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 01:42 AM
13

Start interviewing lawyers.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 06:29 PM
1

In NYC he is just middle class. I’m a New Yorker and sadly the show was spot on for me.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 11:46 AM
1

Correct. If they refuse it’s contempt of court.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 05:15 PM
1

Yup. And guess what you may meet women there who enjoy the same things.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 03:15 PM
2

Ugh. So true
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 12:54 PM
2

She’s a covert
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 11:30 AM
6

Mine too! I just started my divorce process after 16 years of marriage and 2 kids. I can’t take the abuse anymore. I told her I’m not discussing emotions etc unless she’s in therapy and there is couples therapy. Not sure that would even help but it’s my low contact for now. For her own sake I hope she gets it together. But I’m wondering if she ever will. Curious to hear
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 02:25 AM
3

Ask him if he has done therapy.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/23 11:48 PM
2

I’m still in mine but I want to. Kind of a re-entry into social life.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/23 09:55 PM
7

After waiting on everyone all morning at our “vacation “ house with a newborn I finally sat down on the couch. When my brother in law muttered something (asking for a beer) and I said “What?” (Not “what!”) my STBXW started yelling at me. F it all
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/23 12:31 AM
7

Same here. It’s like she set out to destroy our marriage
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 05:42 PM
11

God yes. STBXW insisted we get a $1m vacation house. Guess whose family comes to stay? Guess who shops, cooks, and cleans? So ready to be done with it.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 05:41 PM
1

You can and should sue for custody, child support, alimony, and waste.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 01:29 AM
3

Therapy.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/23 01:42 PM
5

Sure and they should ask you her name immediately to check for a conflict.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/23 01:41 PM
3

Get an appraisal or 2. Get a brokers opinion of value (BPO). Or just check the price estimates on Zillow and Redfin. Perhaps deduct selling costs (broker fee, local transfer taxes). Deduct the mortgage balance due. Divide by half. This is your buyout #.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/23 12:47 PM
1

My STBXW moved us 1000 miles away for her job and doubled down on her abuse on me (as the job didn’t work out). I realized how alone I was and even my friends had their own wives and lives. Fortunately we moved back to our hometown. I’m filing imminently. I don’t owe any explanation or attention to anyone. My immediate family is of limited help. I’m looking forward to my freedom.
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/23 03:52 PM
1

Sadly you need a lawyer, to get full custody and get her out. Try calling some men’s advocates. I just googled and found nebraskans4family . Com no idea if they’re good or what. But a referral from a service like that should get you a free consultation (30 minutes - 1 hour). Google for like fathers rights Nebraska or men’s rights Nebraska. Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 10:27 PM
2

Sounds like all the reasons I stayed and regret it. Leave and don’t look back
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/23 12:14 AM
4

Get a lawyer. 2. Get a pen recording device. GA is a 1 party consent recording state. Record your discussion when you explain divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/23 02:45 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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