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HalfTheMan611 Archive

View 2 posts and 41 comments by HalfTheMan611 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
30

HalfTheMan611/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 10:31 PM
9

HalfTheMan611/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 10:40 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

49, two years out, two kids under 11. Dating pool 35-42 for me has been plentiful and very high quality. Depends on where you are maybe, but my experience has been super positive.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/25 10:59 PM
1

I most definitely would not have felt like this if she moved on right away, but that would have been because it took me a couple years to accept, find peace, and crucially, for me to find love again with someone else.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/25 08:54 PM
7

Interestingly, my perspective on this has changed massively. For a couple years, the thought of another man entering my kids' lives was simply incomprehensible. Just thinking about them sleeping in the same house as another man filled me with rage, panic, helplessness, and despair - it was probably the most troubling of all of the thoughts I experienced on this journey. But having found love again with another woman after several years of separation /divorce and thinking about the possibility of…
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/25 08:27 AM
11

Walk away wife. 2 kids. Devastated. Deepest, darkest depression of my kife. 2 years later, never been happier. Therapy was critical as has been a hobby dear to me since childhood. Going out dating again has also been extremely helpful. I didn't want to at first, but pushed myself onto the apps and out the door. Life will get better, guy, I'm certain of it. But you gotta press on and out of the funk.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/25 03:21 PM
8

I remember feeling a sense of helplessness and panic thinking about this early on in our separation/divorce. Two years later, I genuinely hope for this to happen: I hope for her happiness and to find a partner that makes her happy. This is despite her being the walkaway wife. Certainly helps that I've found love, but in summary bro, it takes time to get here, but you will. I never thought I would, but I have!
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 07:09 PM
3

This describes exactly what happened to me. A selfless life for over 15 years, on autopilot grind, working, renovating the house, taking care of the kids. I didn't realise it at the time, but I was miserable. My ex wife left me and left me completely devastated for about a year and a half. Therapy has quite literally been my life saver. It has been one of the single most important things I've done in my life. It helps that my therapist is excellent - a man of great experience and wisdom, but thr…
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 08:42 AM
4

I picked up vaping during my deep depression from separation and divorce two years ago and have to say it was a huge help. I used to smoke cigarettes 20 years ago, but abstained since. I savoured those moments of enjoying some nicotine from the vape with a cup of coffee or tea. It was part of my ritual sitting and reflecting and trying to make sense of it all. I don't feel any regret or shame from it. The thing now is do I stop two years in? Hehe...
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 11:07 PM
3

Thanks, man. Have been focusing on that stuff for the past two years - gym regularly, have a hobby I'm very into with a social dimension to it. Been focusing on myself but would really like to have a relationship again. I think I'm ready for it, but yea, a lot of self doubt there.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 11:06 PM
3

What I've learned by going through this is any anger, bitterness, disappointment, frustration, hatred, betrayal, etc (and I've definitely felt all of those things) that I felt about her in the past did nothing but affect self. When you feel those emotions, it's not like they leave your body and mind and go into her, they're your feelings alone - and as long as you hold onto them, you'll never be able to find peace and happiness. As soon as I started to accept things for how they were and find it…
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 08:34 PM
4

Together for 15 years, married for 10. The longing ended after 2 years of separation. Like others have said, I now laugh about it. I genuinely wish her happiness. You'll get there bro.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 03:32 PM
7

Bro, she's clearly done. A committed wife would never put someone they love through that. As heartbreaking and gut wrenching it is, find all of your inner resolve to let go, and file. Be stoic, don't beg, don't lose your cool. I've been there. Quite disgraceful but all too common. I'm on the other side now, excited about the prospects of a new life. I can't believe I wasted so much time with my ex, but every day is a gift. FtB.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/24 07:43 PM
4

For me, the hardest part has changed. It took me three years to intensely grieve the loss of the life and relationship I committed to (ex wife walked away), my traditional family which gave me the deepest sense of purpose in my life up to that point, and what that might have meant to my children's happiness and wellbeing, what was meant to be their time of safety and togetherness. But, over that time, we have settled into a new normal (respectfully co-parent well), the kids are doing great, and …
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/24 09:58 AM
2

Correct. Hardest thing I ever had to do. Truth comes when he's old enough to understand.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 04:19 PM
3

You're right. I've been trying to follow this approach. I had one hit me up on an app. We exchanged about four rounds of back and forth over 2 days, she seemed super keen. My last touch was "why don't we catch up over a drink" to stop with the messaging and poof, gone. WTF is that? I mean I know she's probably juggling many matches, but this is my case in point. They all are (I mean, I am too TBF), but this keeps happening over and over. I think the whole thing, commoditising people, flipping th…
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 09:34 PM
10

I think this might be as much about the state of dating in this modern era as it is the baggage all around. I've been separated for over two years and divorced for a few months. I've been over my ex for a long while and decided to get back out there on the apps. I've been getting lots of interest, matches, etc, but most chats end up fizzling out and girls ghosting. Admittedly my issue has been landing dates as opposed to cultivating relationships, but with endless swiping and seemingly endless o…
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 10:27 AM
10

What price do you put on happiness?
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/24 07:25 PM
6

Quote from Goodfellas (Ray Liotta's character, Henry Hill): "The way I saw it, everybody takes a beating sometime"
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 03:19 PM
6

Thanks in part to the family law industry.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 02:32 PM
2

Some great advice right here. One further piece of advice I would give myself back in those early days is to keep your head, not lose your cool, shout or go on any form of attack, even in the case of deep feelings of betrayal and sadness. Look for inner peace, learn to let it go as it doesn't matter anymore. It took some mistakes to realise that it only serves to hold back one's own path to happiness and in my case, fed into the narrative my ex created in her mind about who I was.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 01:31 PM
3

I often daydream about going on a tropical vacation and enjoying relaxation and happiness on a stunning warm beach as a respite from the pain of losing my family. But then I remember you take your brain with you and as others have said, healing comes from within. So I will heal where I am and celebrate with that trip once I get to where I want to be!
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/24 08:04 PM
10

Almost definitely. Nearing 50. Don't really see the point and fortunately no longer have the need for companionship. After being taken for granted for years and then left high and dry. Why would I put any trust in a woman again let alone deal with any of their b.s. No thanks.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 10:02 PM
15

Women will break a promise and have no sense of honour nor moral duty - they are guided by emotions and are ultimately selfish. Am I generalizing solely on the basis of my X? Yes.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/24 10:02 AM
1

You're absolutely right. It plays right into the narrative in their mind.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 07:23 PM
0

I'm sorry you faced this. How gut wrenching. I would most definitely not be ok if my X introduced my kids to a new man if she hadn't been seeing him for at least a year, probably more. I'm pretty sure I won't be ok even then, but I've had to accept that will eventually happen. At a bare minimum, I would expect a basic level of courtesy to be told beforehand. But with my walkaway X who thought only of herself when ditching a good husband and father and breaking her precious small family and break…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 02:19 PM
12

Most definitely not. I made the promise till death do us part, sacrificed it all for my wife and family, wanted nothing more than to love and be loved. She checked out and left and shattered my and kids life without ever giving a proper explanation. I will never trust a woman to that extent ever again.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 01:05 AM
1

It happens. Don't beat yourself up about it but learn from this. It's exceptionally hard for all of us. "Going home"? How can you make your place "home" too?
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 09:02 AM
9

While I think there are definitely scenarios where this is the way, like dealing with narcissists and highly manipulative people, for me, I felt like using it was a way to try and invoke some sort of punishment for my ex who left me. And while I dealt with anger and resentment for a very long time, having learned to let that go, being a kind communicative person feels better for ME. It's no longer about the ex, she threw it away. I won't let her take away my kindness. I'm a rock, but not gray. T…
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 10:19 PM
0

Fair enough, dude. Good perspectives.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 04:14 PM
12

I feel the same. My wife checked out, fell out of love and left me. I sacrificed it all for my family and I made a commitment both in marriage and to my children when I brought them into this world. I want my home to be a sanctuary for them and for them to never feel uncomfortable in their own home. I wouldn't want them to see me with another woman. It's sad to think I'll never have that type of love again, but I feel very strongly about it. I may feel differently in the future, but that's how I…
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 12:11 PM
1

It took me so long to finally settle down, had many relationships for years prior to the one with my STBXW (17 years together, 10 married). You could say I had a good run during my twenties and early thirties - lots of attractive women from all around the globe. When I finally committed to marriage, my vows were genuine, and it was the one truly heart felt commitment I've ever made to pretty much anything. I meant till death due us part without conditions. I got blindsided by a walk away wife an…
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/23 12:28 AM
1

I'm in a similar boat, albeit on a smaller scale. I worked hard for years, invested wisely, she always took the easy way out with work. She is also going through a mid life crisis, fell out of love, and left me. I was pretty devastated for a year, now getting over it, and want ink on paper. I'm desperately keen to avoid my kids education fund and inheritance to go to lawyers so offered a 50/50 split of matrimonial assets, 90% of which I built, just to end it, move forward, and focus on rebuildin…
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/23 09:58 PM
3

If you are in another state, does that mean your child is in the other fulltime with your ex? If so, I'm wondering if another man being in your child's life would hurt less if you were more in your child's. I myself have 50/50 but haven't yet had to deal with another man entering the scene. I expect that to be extremely difficult to deal with.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 12:14 PM
8

Don't take all the blame or beat yourself up. If you were/are suffering from PTSD, I'd say it sucks your wife chose to leave rather than support you and help you get through it. In sickness and in health, right? In my case it was likely unacknowledged depression and anxiety. My wife gave up on me too.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 06:23 AM
4

I believed this my whole life until my wife left. I now think all humans need the support of others. I don't have it at the moment as I lived my life as you say which is why separation and divorce is hitting me so hard and why I think it tends to hit men harder generally speaking. Being mental health week I think this is an important topic.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 06:18 AM
1

Yea, I've tried that strategy, working to focus on being alone and present (and not thinking about the past or where anyone else is), but the innate instinct to want to protect the kids makes it extremely difficult. I guess it will take time but for me, any "healing" is ultimately accepting what my biological instinct knows is wrong. But nothing I can do really. Trying to not be bitter and resentful to the selfish woman I committed my life to.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 10:26 AM
7

That's some perspective, man, for sure. Sorry you're in that situation.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 11:22 PM
1

Thank you. Truth.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 11:20 PM
5

Yup. Certainly my experience. It ultimately served as a "safe" place for my wife to drop the bomb.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/23 04:26 PM
2

Though I fully subscribe to the idea of being stoic and as respectful as possible during this stage as difficult as I know that is, I'm sorry, but that's absolutely outrageous. True colours being shown there. My earlier self would have flown off the handle in a big way. Remain calm, don't say anything, and move the process forward as swiftly as possible to end this arrangement and ideally the marriage ASAP. Level head until ink on paper.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/23 09:54 PM
5

Hey my man. Same exact scenario on this end. The sacrifices we've made for years for the sake of family and doing the right, honourable thing. Doing ongoing deep soul searching to let the bitterness go. Try and do the same. Know you're a good man. Be the best dad you can be for your kiddos. Hang in there.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 09:06 PM
2

I know first hand how difficult your situation is - I've been in the exact same boat for many months now. It has been the most difficult time of my life. Being a dad is the most important thing in the world to me - the truest identity I've ever had. To consider losing 50% of my time with them remains incomprehensible. Although we haven't been getting along for a couple years now, it was earlier this year where my wife told me (in so many words) it was over between us. I never in a million years …
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/22 08:29 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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