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Hartley7 Archive

View 5 posts and 296 comments by Hartley7 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I hold sacred my responsibility to plan and prepare delicious meals. It’s a sign of my respect and love for my husband. I’ve recently focused on cooking from scratch more often than I was and my husband greatly appreciates these efforts. I hold sacred my ability to manage my feelings and my demeanour. I try to be as pleasant and respectful as possible. I’m submissive and I hold deep reverence for my husband’s leadership. It’s easy to be submissive when a man is a provider and protector.
/r/RedPillWives29/07/25 05:25 AM
13

So well stated and very true. My husband likes to have sex at least 3-4 times a week. He’s a wonderful lover so the erotic sacrifice is joyous for me. We don’t have children as we married later in life. I’m sure that not having kids gives us more time and energy for sex. Sex is a physical and emotional need for husbands. We owe it to our marriages and our husbands to be sexually available.
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/25 08:20 PM
2

Of course not! We are too old to be waking up with infants.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/25 06:59 PM
3

Speaking as a 42 year old woman, I find it funny when people ask me if I will be having a child with my fiancé. I’m way too old for that nonsense. Who really wants a 7 or 8 year old kid in their 50s?
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/25 09:33 PM
1

Yes I do agree. Nobody can unfuck another person haha. That guy also got dumped because he was not sexually confident and it turned me off. I grew weary of reassuring him that his dick size was enough. He was also a bad lover and couldn’t take feedback.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/25 09:55 PM
1

Yes and the sex can’t be taken back. What’s done is done.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/25 09:22 PM
1

I agree that men are sexually oriented. I also believe that some women place importance on sex too. I was in a sexless marriage and I just couldn’t do it anymore. I also think that anyone has the right to stop having sex whenever they like. It’s just not typically well received. I once dumped a man partly for that reason-we were in a relationship and had sex. He said he regretted “doing it too soon” and wanted to wait until he took me on a trip to have sex. That felt like some strange mind game.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/25 09:20 PM
2

That has not been my experience. If a man wants a woman he will make it known. That’s why men are still usually the first to ask women on dates.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/25 02:39 PM
2

He should bring it up if he wants it. A woman shouldn’t have to ask a man to be hers. This is why I didn’t have sex until a man asked for exclusivity. I wanted less of the anxiety you were experiencing. I also didn’t want to waste time in an undefined relationship. I’m not sure why it’s too early to expect exclusivity but it wasn’t too early to risk pregnancy and STIs. Women risk pregnancy every time we sleep with a man if we’re on birth control. STIs are always a risk because condoms only reduc…
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/25 11:30 PM
1

Has he asked you to be in an exclusive relationship? If he hasn’t-why not? The two of you are already having sex and seeing each other frequently. Why not make it official?
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/25 05:22 PM
3

I think it’s much too early to decide if this is going to be a long relationship or not. It’s best for the OP not to get her hopes up so soon. Also, plenty of men will string along a woman for more than one sex session and then dump her. I don’t like how he knew of the OP’s boundary, claimed to respect it, then had sex with her anyway. The actions and words don’t match.
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/25 12:21 AM
1

Not true. This could all be an act.
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/25 11:31 PM
1

I left a sexless marriage at age 38. I tried to stay for years but I just couldn’t do it anymore. It didn’t help that my ex husband also refused marriage counselling and he was financially abusive. Ordinarily I would encourage you to stay for your child BUT the high level of deception is a dealbreaker. I couldn’t have a husband who lied to me in such a strategic manner.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/25 12:36 AM
1

While I agree that dating as a single mom is difficult, you are still very young so you have time on your side. Date single dads who also only have one child. Find a reliable birth control method so that you don’t find yourself in this situation again. Never live with another man unless you’re married. With a child involved, the stakes are higher. You don’t want to be an eternal girlfriend with no stability for your child. Do background checks on men you date. Do not introduce men to your child …
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/25 12:32 AM
1

I agree. A good man is a hardworking provider. A man who refuses to provide cannot be a good partner.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/25 12:26 AM
2

Fiancé proposed after 10 months. He found love for the first time very late in life (36) My fiancé loved my values, quality, and the great friendship we have outside of our romantic relationship. I think I also helped him self actualize and individuate from a codependent family dynamic.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/25 12:18 AM
5

Cutting apron strings is essential for a happy marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/25 04:42 PM
1

You don’t have to move out immediately. You’re still very young. I was on my own at age 21 and it was harrowing. Take slow steps toward complete independence.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/25 01:01 AM
27

That’s a huge move to make just for a boyfriend. I wouldn’t make a move like that unless I was married or at the very least engaged. You will need to become independent of your parents at some point if you want to grow to your full potential. Those who lean on their parents too much do not have the chance to become mature and autonomous. I think that becoming independent in your own right before living with a man is important.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/25 11:13 PM
0

26 is a kid! You have your whole life ahead of you. I’m marrying for the second time at 43.
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/25 04:42 PM
2

This makes complete sense-especially in terms of vetting. When I was single, I had phone conversations before meeting in person and that was when I decided whether or not a date was worth my time.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/25 04:53 PM
1

I would tend to agree in most cases. Some religious communities encourage marriage very quickly.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/25 03:43 AM
1

We each have separate accounts but share all of our money.
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/25 05:48 PM
12

I’m sorry dear. This is a huge red flag because he was much too handsy and he also wouldn’t respect your boundaries. A true gentleman wouldn’t have been all over you and he wouldn’t have pushed you like that either. This man was also trying to create a false sense of intimacy by using pet names immediately. He could be lying about wanting children and marriage just to get you into bed. Future faking is very common. It might be helpful to listen to your gut. It doesn’t seem like you are comfortab…
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/25 01:58 PM
2

Some men may take that as a sign to be controlling. Those types overplay the submissive aspect of traditional relationships. Others may try to get you to be domestic while they provide nothing.
/r/RedPillWomen19/01/25 10:16 PM
7

Online dating is sifting through many profiles to find the right man for you. I would avoid putting anything about traditional values and wanting a man to look after you. That would be too obvious and such words could attract predators. I love the advice about dressing modestly and being clear about wanting a long term relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/25 12:48 AM
6

Don’t put him or any other man on a pedestal. He is not perfect. He has flaws just like anyone else. Try to think of whether or not you like him rather than being so concerned about him liking you. You are the prize. If you are very focused on “locking him down,” you might end up compromising your standards to keep him. In terms of sex, I have found that it is best to wait until you are in a committed exclusive relationship before letting a man into your body. Men respect what and whom they have…
/r/RedPillWomen15/01/25 11:14 PM
1

Absolutely not! You’re so young!
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/25 09:02 AM
3

Just remember that a person who is stingy with money is often stingy with emotions too. It seems like he’s taking advantage of you. He expects you to take care of him and his household while giving you nothing in return. That’s terrible. Perhaps he chose a much younger woman because he felt that you would be easier to manipulate than a woman with more life experience. I’m only saying that because that is something I have observed men doing and also experienced as the younger partner.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/25 09:01 AM
2

I agree. I dropped a former friend because she was always harshly lecturing other women about their romantic lives and calling their love interests ugly. Meanwhile, she was married to a much older man who wasn’t interested in sex with her and she complained about that.
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/25 03:45 AM
1

It’s obvious that he isn’t ready for a relationship. That’s why he’s talking about his ex often and why he won’t be exclusive. You have nothing to apologize for. Apologize to yourself for caring so much about this guy. He’s not worth it.
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/25 03:37 AM
3

Thanks so much. My wisdom came from bad experiences, therapy, and reading books about relationships. My parents have also set an excellent example in being married for 50 years. There’s no shame in seeking help. We all need assistance navigating this messy business of being human. I too believed that OP was in her early 20s. She can still grow with the right help and healthier dating practices.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/24 03:57 AM
4

The norm these days is casual sex and fwb. This is why vetting and dating with intention are so important. It’s also a good idea to establish commitment before sex. Remember that some men will fake commitment to get sex too.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/24 03:24 AM
2

We all need to learn lessons. I do think that 34 is too old to behave this way but maybe you haven’t had much dating experience. There could also be underlying psychiatric issues that you aren’t aware of. Professional help would change your life.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/24 02:29 AM
4

He may have still wanted access to your body and that’s why he wasn’t blunt. He may have also noticed that you seem volatile and he wasn’t keen dealing with a possibly explosive emotional reaction. Do you mind if I ask your age? Dating is difficult and it requires resilience. People often misrepresent themselves to get what they want. Dating is also a delicate emotional dance. We need to be mindful of refraining from putting ourselves in compromising situations where men will take advantage of u…
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/24 05:24 PM
12

Why were you overwhelmed with emotion when you barely knew the man?
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/24 03:51 AM
1

This is very smart!
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/24 04:20 PM
30

I’m going to gently suggest that you seek help. Some of the behaviour you mentioned sounds rather unhinged. Texting a man you just met about implantation symptoms would certainly frighten him. Desperately chasing and demanding answers about commitment is also crazy behaviour. When a man wants commitment, you will not need to confront him and push for answers. You will know by both his words and actions. If you sleep with a man too quickly and without any commitment, saying that you are not easy …
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/24 04:18 PM
4

You don’t have to make up for anything. It was his choice to pursue you. You are giving too much because you don’t think you deserve to be treated well.
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/24 03:52 PM
0

I also want to add something-you and this man have quite an age gap. Sometimes older men deliberately choose younger women because they want to manipulate them. That could be the case in your relationship. I used to love older men when I was younger. I don’t anymore because I don’t want to deal with someone who is always tired and can’t satisfy me sexually. I also do not want to be a nurse and a purse. After my divorce from an older man, I started dating men in my age group and the difference wa…
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/24 11:39 AM
4

This! I love being domestic for a man I love. However, he has to be taking care of me too. If I’m cooking, cleaning, and having sex, then I expect dates, gifts, and being picked up. Relationships aren’t supposed to be one sided.
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/24 11:31 AM
3

You are making far too much effort. I don’t think men respect women who constantly bend over backwards for them. It might be time to stop visiting and doing housework so often. Focus more on your own life.
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/24 11:26 AM
9

When a man’s effort goes down, that’s when you need to dial back your efforts and become less available to him. You also need to let them know that you’re not willing to tolerate the lack of effort. They can either step up or not. It’s up to them. If there is no change after this discussion then it’s time to walk away. Never beg a man to make an effort with you. You’re very young and you have plenty of time to find someone who is consistent. I have been with my fiancé for nearly 3 years and he s…
/r/RedPillWomen11/12/24 10:36 PM
2

Who cares what your mother thinks? My fiancé’s family is very racist. He is white. We’re still getting married. He cut them off because he was so disgusted with their behaviour. I giggle when I think of how angry they must be that we’re getting married. They did everything to break us up. My point is that you can’t live to please your parents. They will die and then you will be unhappy because you spent your life pleasing them. You should consider opening your dating pool.
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/24 11:56 PM
11

From one sister to another….it might be a good idea to diversify your dating choices. Men of all races can be equally terrible. It’s just that you will have more options if you don’t limit yourself to black men. You just need to mindful of fetishization and other forms of racism. I’m 42 and I was married at age 28. When my marriage ended, I never had an issue with finding suitors even though I was in my late 30s by then. I met my fiancé when I was 39. Believing that our race and age means you ha…
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/24 04:36 PM
24

I was firmly honest about my stance on sex before I even agreed to a date. I brutally cut off any man who pressured me for sex. One of the reasons I fell for my fiancé is he never pressured me for sex.
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/24 01:27 AM
2

This resonates with me. I am generally not a submissive woman. I submit to my fiancé in some areas because it is a gesture of trust.
/r/RedPillWomen21/11/24 12:19 AM
1

Nope.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/24 01:54 AM
5

This marriage will only be successful if your husband is willing to individuate from his parents. Marriage is for adults and not emotionally dependent children. Your husband is essentially choosing his parents over you. It’s time to leave and let him be with his one true love-his mother. I say this because he has told you what his priorities are. My fiancé comes from an enmeshed family. His parents are also very racist. They hate the fact that he is going to marry a black woman. My fiancé stood …
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/24 01:53 AM
1

I would not live with a man without a ring and a wedding date. So many women end up being an eternal girlfriend when they play wifey with no real commitment. If he had conservative values, marriage would be important to him and so would having children within marriage. It’s best not to waste your time dating men who do not share your values. This looks like an older man taking advantage of a younger woman.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/24 01:40 AM
2

Long distance relationships are usually lies. They are rampant with cheating. If he isn’t talking about marriage then he doesn’t want to get married soon. It’s that simple. Find someone closer.
/r/RedPillWomen06/11/24 02:54 AM
1

You responded to a comment which was written FIVE YEARS AGO just to throw a tantrum. That is such pointless idiocy yet I am the dumbass in your pea brain. What a joke! Feminism has convinced women that careers are more important than motherhood. That leads to women waiting too long to have a child and then expecting doctors to work miracles.
/r/RedPillWives20/03/23 07:23 PM
2

A former prostitute giving relationship advice? Ewwwww
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/23 07:12 PM
1

I believe that every couple handles consent differently and I happen to find asking for consent to be unromantic and unnecessary in a marriage. YMMV.
/r/RedPillWives04/02/20 10:28 PM
1

I was speaking of much less playful asking for permission to have sex.
/r/RedPillWives04/02/20 09:48 PM
1

I feel the same way. I have felt the primal urge to reproduce. Once I start thinking about all of the less palatable realities of motherhood, I remember how much I enjoy my life and my marriage as they are now. The roller coaster of a vasectomy reversal, TTC in my late thirties, and childbearing with a chronic illness doesn’t seem worth the trouble. I do not wish to be in my 50s with young teenagers either. My husband doesn’t want children but he would have one with me out of love and the belief…
/r/RedPillWives31/01/20 04:34 AM
2

No. I just focus on being a wonderful spouse, lover, partner, and very best friend.
/r/RedPillWives14/01/20 02:51 AM
1

What was his response?
/r/RedPillWives20/12/19 06:26 AM
14

You might not want to create distance and resentment in your marriage but that is exactly what the lack of sex is leading to. I believe that marriage comes with implied consent. It is not sexy and romantic to verbally ask permission for physical intimacy. Spouses have the right to say no but there isn't any reason for verbal consent when you have sex with your spouse. I do not refuse my husband unless I am very ill. Of course, my husband doesn't approach me for sex during those times so that has…
/r/RedPillWives25/11/19 04:39 AM
2

I have seen this occurrence quite frequently.
/r/RedPillWives09/10/19 11:47 PM
2

I don’t know if my perspective is relevant since I did not wait until marriage for sex. I did, however, wait months to sleep with my husband and I know that set me apart from other women. He was accustomed to sex within a few dates. My husband felt that I was “special” because I showed restraint and I also nurtured him in ways that other women would not. He found it refreshing that I didn’t focus only on his career as an engineer. My husband is an atheist. We are not wealthy but we are affluent …
/r/RedPillWives28/09/19 08:46 PM
2

Great advice about the nun mode. After any failed relationship, it's best to be alone for at least 6 months in order to heal and understand why the relationship did not work out.
/r/RedPillWives05/09/19 06:08 PM
3

1.) Changing for a man is worthwhile if the changes are positive and sustainable. It's also imperative that we change partly for ourselves. 2.) I have become more submissive and agreeable. I am much more pleasant to be around. I am no longer constantly angry and I do not rebel against my husband out of a lack of humility. I show appreciation and admiration for my husband as well. Embracing a healthier lifestyle has made me look and feel better. My husband also finds me much more attractive due t…
/r/RedPillWives05/09/19 05:49 PM
2

You are still so young. Don't waste your prime SMV years on a man with such different values than your own. He clearly doesn't believe in monogamy and honesty. Staying with this man will bring you heartache.
/r/RedPillWives18/08/19 11:16 PM
1

The issue is that you don’t feel comfortable deferring to your husband. You already know why I think that is but of course I could be wrong. I just know that I would find it difficult to defer if I was the one providing for the household. Can you get to the bottom of why you don’t trust your husband?
/r/RedPillWives21/07/19 03:53 PM
1

I don't think that it would be wise to have another child while your marriage is not doing well. Babies can be taxing for even the strongest and happiest marriage. Babies are not bandaids. It seems like your marriage is not doing well due to power struggles and the fact that you don't feel that your husband is masculine enough. This is why you are stressed and your nerves are frayed. A man who stays home with his children will always appear to be less masculine in the eyes of women, because men …
/r/RedPillWives20/07/19 04:22 AM
2

I was on The Pill for many years until it gave me a tumor in my liver. My husband had a vasectomy years ago. We choose not to have children for many reasons including medical concerns.
/r/RedPillWives14/07/19 02:45 AM
1

It could be beneficial to practice radical acceptance as well as becoming humble enough to realize that you can’t make anyone do anything. Focus on what you can change in yourself rather than pointing the finger at your husband all the time.
/r/RedPillWives16/06/19 10:32 PM
5

I actually agreed with some of Roosh's former viewpoints on men and women. I just didn't enjoy how much he seemed to hate women. Roosh is likely just realizing that the hookup culture is ultimately empty so he is trying to make changes to live a fulfilled life. Unfortunately, no traditional woman is going to touch Roosh with a ten foot pole due to his history.
/r/RedPillWives08/06/19 12:18 AM
3

I don't think you're wrong. I think your husband is very cruel. Being attracted to others while married is normal but constantly talking about it is just rude and unnecessary. I do believe that most men have desires which may not be palatable. However, gentlemen refrain from crudely discussing attraction to other women when they with the ladies they have chosen to spend their lives with. Just remember that you cannot control your husband's fantasies and sexual desires which involve other women. …
/r/RedPillWives08/06/19 12:13 AM
2

I was 28. He was 36. I would tell myself to stop being so argumentative and bitter. I was not a good wife back then.
/r/RedPillWives24/05/19 04:47 PM
4

When I was dating my husband, I went into a lingerie store to buy a corset with stockings. I mentioned that I wasn't a fan of this type of lingerie. The saleswoman was a kindly older lady. She asked "Do you love this man? Do you want to marry him?" I said yes and she said "Start dressing to please him and thrill him then. I also think it's great that you have pointed out that the OP's boyfriend may feel diminished in other ways and this hair situation is a red herring.
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/19 04:43 PM
12

I agree. I want to lose 40 pounds but my husband thinks that is too much. I have had other women tell me that I shouldn't care about my husband's preferences for my appearance. This kind of immature selfishness is the reason why so many relationships fail.
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/19 04:35 PM
2

My parents are from Clarendon.
/r/RedPillWives13/05/19 04:16 PM
19

I’m going to go against the grain and say that you have every right to be upset. It doesn’t take much effort to remember a holiday and I believe that men can acknowledge holidays if they truly want to. You may want to have a loving discussion about your expectations so that this doesn’t happen again.
/r/RedPillWives13/05/19 03:40 PM
6

As someone with Jamaican parents, I need to say that your screen name is hilarious.
/r/RedPillWives13/05/19 03:38 PM
6

My husband lost his job right after he proposed. It was a good test of our commitment. Other women mocked me for being with a “broke man who didn’t own a home” but I’m very glad that I didn’t listen to them. I knew the hard times were temporary and not a result of a lack of ambition. I hope that your husband understands that he will be in a good space again. I’m sure that you’re doing well in appropriately supporting him.
/r/RedPillWives05/05/19 01:09 AM
7

I agree with all of this. The Great Recession was so hard on us. We got through it because I consistently expressed confidence in my husband and kept our sex life passionate. I also refrained from becoming upset if my husband seemed depressed or withdrawn.
/r/RedPillWives05/05/19 01:02 AM
1

That's what I believe your upper limit should be. The age that you choose is up to you. There are many age gap dating services as well as Facebook groups.
/r/RedPillWives28/03/19 08:34 PM
2

One suggestion is date older men. At your age, I wouldn't go any higher than 10 years your senior. The good ones are more mature than their younger counterparts and they are also more financially secure. Just try not to get so blinded by monetary gain that you forget to vet properly.
/r/RedPillWives28/03/19 08:18 PM
3

I'm sorry....are you saying that all Chinese men are not wealthy? I don't understand.
/r/RedPillWives28/03/19 07:43 PM
1

Have you spoken to your family about finding a match for you? That might be a good place to start.
/r/RedPillWives28/03/19 07:39 PM
1

Are your parents from East Asia?
/r/RedPillWives16/03/19 08:26 PM
2

If you have properly vetted your boyfriend, then it shouldn't be difficult to bring up marriage. It makes sense that you are concerned about the best way to approach that topic though. Do the two of you have similar values about marriage and family? Make sure that you do before taking this path. When you talk to your boyfriend, wait for a time when both of you are relaxed and have time for a long discussion. Simply say "I would like to discuss where our relationship is headed. We've been dating …
/r/RedPillWives16/03/19 02:21 AM
1

I'm not sure which country you are from in "East Asia". Are arranged marriages common in your culture? If so, is your family willing to let you choose whom you marry from a pool of suitable prospects?
/r/RedPillWives16/03/19 02:16 AM
1

I would suggest that both of you start taking a supplement called Fertility Smart. It's cheaper if you buy in bulk and they offer a refund on unused bottles if you become pregnant halfway through the supply. Extra selenium and folic acid on top of the supplement would be great for your husband too. Try a spoonful of royal jelly everyday. It's produced by worker bees for the development of queen bees. Apparently, it's great for fertility as well. If possible, have sex three times a week throughou…
/r/RedPillWives02/03/19 09:16 PM
2

Are you and your husband taking any natural fertility supplements? I am aware of a few which can be very helpful.
/r/RedPillWives01/03/19 03:01 AM
2

It's not unreasonable but you may want to tread lightly when discussing this issue with your husband. He may see the upgrade as a sign of his ability to provide luxuries for you. You don't want to hurt his masculine pride by showing your reluctance or outright declining your husband's lovely gift. My husband is adamant that we renew our vows with a lavish ceremony and reception. We eloped when we married and it caused a huge stir within our families. Many things went wrong during our elopement a…
/r/RedPillWives23/02/19 11:22 PM
3

Now that you have provided more context, I have a deeper understanding of why this man seems like a good match in your eyes. It's worrisome that one of your reasons for being with this man is "I’m so poor right now anything would be a step up financially". That is the desperation I was speaking of before. Because you are in a difficult situation, you could end up jumping from the frying pan into the fire. Having no debt is impressive but that is not the only requirement for being able to provide…
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 04:57 AM
4

There's a difference between prioritizing financial security and materialism. Have you considered how it will affect your relationship when he is unable to provide for you?
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/19 04:45 AM
0

The logic is showing trust and respect for his masculinity.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 11:23 PM
9

I don't know if being an idealist is helpful in this situation. Please do not be desperate because you have two children. Yes, being a single mother lowers your SMV but there is no reason to settle for a poor ex con.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 11:19 PM
4

I love this. You are very wise for your age. Men love to feel appreciated. They also need to believe that we respect them enough to be able to complete tasks on their own.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 10:56 PM
2

How do you instruct your husband during sex? I'm asking because sex is such a sensitive topic for men and your husband might feel that you are criticizing his performance. It's very common for Christians to rush into marriage. This is due to religious and social pressure to marry, as well as the desire for sex which is pleasing to God. Your husband might have some residual guilt from being taught that sex before marriage is wrong. He could also be sexually inexperienced. Another possibility is a…
/r/RedPillWives11/12/18 03:55 AM
3

How old are you, OP? Focus on getting well first. Go into Nun Mode until you have your mental health issues under control otherwise you could end up attracting predatory men. There are many options for hair removal but you might want to find out if there is a medical reason for your hirsutism. A daily routine could also be helpful as well. Have you tried any supplements which can help you get a good night's sleep? I recommend Natural Calm.
/r/RedPillWives13/11/18 02:35 AM
10

Let men pay for you during courtship. It's a sign of being an Alpha provider.
/r/RedPillWives13/11/18 02:29 AM
3

Femininity is a unique gift which carries soft power. Revel in femininity and celebrate all that makes you different from men. Above all, men need respect and appreciation. Think about that when you communicate with your husband.
/r/RedPillWives05/11/18 09:59 PM
1

It’s time to distance yourself from your mother since she cannot respect your boundaries. I agree that your mother is a controlling nag. You don’t have to cut her off completely but you can reduce your interactions with your mother. FWIW, I have a mother like this and she isn’t permitted to stay in our home and we don’t stay with her. She is very rude, loud, and controlling. My MIL is the same so we have set the same boundaries around interactions with her.
/r/RedPillWives28/10/18 11:14 PM
2

This is what happens when women are so blinded by wealth that they refuse to vet potential spouses. My old friend is just jealous that my husband isn’t a rude jerk and I can depend on him without fear of negative consequences.
/r/RedPillWives28/10/18 11:04 PM
2

You shouldn’t feel guilty for showing genuine emotions nor should your husband be angry with you for weeping. That’s not fair to you. When I cry, my husband takes me into his arms and holds me until I stop.
/r/RedPillWives21/10/18 03:11 PM
4

I’m going to distance myself from her because she made a snide remark about my weight. I am a size 10 and she is a 4. I recently lost over 25 pounds and she said “Congrats on your weight loss. It’s a good thing your husband likes big women. My husband would never even look at someone your size.” Girl bye! Enjoy your awful marriage to a cheater.
/r/RedPillWives21/10/18 03:08 PM
10

If my husband loses his job, we each have savings and investments to live on. There are also unemployment benefits or severance if my husband is fired. Divorce would result in splitting of assets as well as alimony. Untimely death is easily prepared for with life insurance. Whether a woman works or not, It makes sense to have contingency plans in place since life is unpredictable. I find it amusing that people often assume that spouses who stay home do not have financial safety nets in place. Th…
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 09:31 PM
1

I agree. She swears that she wasn't trying to be rude but I'm not sure if I believe her.
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 08:13 PM
2

I agree. Even those who do not need to work have to depend on some way of maintaining their income. The stock market comes to mind.
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 08:04 PM
7

He's "not normal" because he is always at strip clubs, he calls her names, and he thinks that buying items makes up for his behavior. She also strongly suspects that he's sleeping around. Her husband is a wealthy and arrogant type.
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 08:03 PM
4

I don't think that there's anything wrong with crying if you're hurt. I agree that showing vulnerability can be very feminine.
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 08:01 PM
6

I think her baby far is too young to be without his mother but I never tell my friend that. In a way, it is rather selfish of my friend to put her career over her little one but she is also married to a terrible man.
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 06:41 PM
9

It's only dangerous to be financially dependent if a man is not trustworthy. Women who think that financial dependence is always dangerous simply haven't been exposed to good men.
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 06:39 PM
6

I think she might be jealous of my happy marriage. She always says that I'm lucky that my husband is "normal."
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 06:38 PM
3

I don't think she has time for tea but I love your idea.
/r/RedPillWives16/10/18 11:38 PM
7

She's going through a lot. This friend also said that I "didn't seem interested in talking to her." because my replies were too short and she initiated conversation most of the time. I told her that we simply had different schedules and I wanted to give her a chance to speak instead of asking her questions about sensitive issues.
/r/RedPillWives16/10/18 11:16 PM
4

Don't tell men about your depression until you're sure that the two of you are in love. Not everybody can handle that kind of information.
/r/RedPillWives16/10/18 10:56 PM
5

I don't see why your advice is viewed as ridiculous. It's good practice to look as cute as possible all the time. Unfortunately, life gets in the way. I know my husband doesn't like to come home to me in my pajamas or my robe so I make sure that I dress nicely for him. I also smell lovely when he arrives. Honestly, keeping great hygiene should be important to a woman whether she is married or not.
/r/RedPillWives14/10/18 01:27 AM
3

Just remember that you're still young so you have time to be in nun mode until you can date with a clear head.
/r/RedPillWives14/10/18 01:23 AM
4

The best way to get a man to lead is to led him know that his judgment is trusted and respected. Making a man feel needed will also inspire him to lead.
/r/RedPillWives14/10/18 01:20 AM
5

Having sex too quickly. Since sex is so accessible to men these days, women who do not have sex soon after meeting set themselves apart. My husband was accustomed to sex with women within three dates. He married the woman who would not have sex for months.
/r/RedPillWives07/09/18 10:19 PM
2

I'm sure that you deserve him. Remember that YOU are the prize. I've gotten past our wedding. We've been able to build a beautiful marriage in spite of the beginnings. Don't count on receiving a certain amount of cash as wedding gifts. The woman I mentioned who had a huge wedding didn't even receive half of what she paid for her special day. Like I said, you're free to spend whatever you wish on your wedding. I hope it goes well.
/r/RedPillWives30/08/18 08:37 PM
5

We eloped. There were many mishaps that day and my parents didn't speak to us for one year. They are very traditional and I'm the only daughter. At first, I regretted our elopement so much that we planned an elaborate vow renewal. Eventually, I came to my senses and realized that a wedding is not a marriage. My elopement taught my parents that we will do as we please and they should not interfere unless they want to be left out. We would have had a family wedding but my mother was being way too …
/r/RedPillWives30/08/18 03:30 AM
3

Exactly.
/r/RedPillWives27/08/18 02:23 PM
1

My husband knows when I have PMS and also when I have my period. He knows about my PMS because my nipples hurt and I don't want him to touch my breasts. My husband is aware of my period because we do not have intercourse during that time.
/r/RedPillWives27/08/18 02:15 PM
30

If he treats you well, you can be domestic for him once in a while but don't make a habit out of it. Think about how much he takes care of you before offering wifely perks.
/r/RedPillWives27/08/18 02:12 PM
2

Perhaps you can take short walks with your son? Everyone has to start somewhere.
/r/RedPillWives30/07/18 06:53 PM
1

Can your husband look after your child while you exercise?
/r/RedPillWives30/07/18 02:29 AM
2

Journal every day. It keeps you connected with yourself and your feelings.
/r/RedPillWives30/07/18 02:28 AM
1

It's so healthy for a marriage to have time as a couple without the children. Dates are essential. Do you keep a journal? I keep one.
/r/RedPillWives28/07/18 02:57 AM
3

We all need recognition for our efforts. What do you like to do for yourself when you're overwhelmed?
/r/RedPillWives27/07/18 11:26 PM
1

It's great that you recognize how important it is to lose weight. I am not a big lady anymore but I was. Keto changed my life. I also drink only citrus infused water and tea. What do you do for exercise? I take brisk 7K walks 4 times a week.
/r/RedPillWives27/07/18 09:07 PM
1

Keto and regular exercise helped me lose over 20 pounds.
/r/RedPillWives27/07/18 09:05 PM
2

Unfortunately, it's quite common for mothers to do far more housework and childcare than men. I don't know if it's helpful for you to focus on your husband's absentmindedness right now. Keeping score in a relationship usually leads to bitterness. Remember that your husband is struggling with his own issues. Whenever I am upset at my husband, I think of what I love about him and what he does well both as a man and as a partner.
/r/RedPillWives27/07/18 09:03 PM
2

I dress in a less revealing manner. I also wear less foundation when I put on make up.
/r/RedPillWives22/07/18 05:10 PM
2

Your comments are so uplifting. Learning from my mother's mistakes is certainly a blessing.
/r/RedPillWives19/07/18 07:40 PM
2

Thank you so much! I hope you have a smooth delivery and a healthy little one. For some reason, we both have a very good feeling about being able to conceive.
/r/RedPillWives19/07/18 07:39 PM
2

Great advice. I feel that God is in control of the situation. We will have a child if we are meant to become parents. I plan on making the journey to parenthood as romantic and passionate as possible.
/r/RedPillWives16/07/18 05:53 AM
1

Thanks! I'm excited too and also nervous. I'm not going to let the nerves stop me from taking a worthwhile step.
/r/RedPillWives16/07/18 05:52 AM
3

We want to keep having positive thoughts just like this.
/r/RedPillWives16/07/18 12:36 AM
1

Thank you! I appreciate the kind words.
/r/RedPillWives16/07/18 12:35 AM
6

I think this is excellent information. Life does not offer guarantees.
/r/RedPillWives15/07/18 08:16 PM
5

Marriage is about compromise. Since you will be the First Mate, your desires are important as well. Perhaps you can set up your own private practice and work part time. On the other hand, I completely understand why your fiance would like you to quit your job. Nothing is worth more than piece of mind. I don't believe that any career is worth a beautiful marriage. I am a firm believer in the importance of practice when we want to improve our skills. The more you perform domestic duties, the bette…
/r/RedPillWives15/07/18 07:12 PM
1

This advice is important for any relationship. I love it. Separating behavior from our feelings towards loved ones is crucial. My husband can upset me in any number of ways but that doesn't mean that my love for him wavers. Besides, I am not always easy to deal with either!
/r/RedPillWives07/07/18 03:32 PM
15

Perhaps you can try to focus on the qualities which you love about your husband. You can also discuss your feelings with him. Unfortunately, your husband may not be amenable to making changes because you knew what his personality was like when you decided to become his wife.
/r/RedPillWives03/07/18 04:36 PM
3

Yes. Catholicism is very red pill.
/r/RedPillWives27/06/18 06:33 PM
9

I love this post. Marriage has forced me to become more mature and patient. Marriage has also helped both of us to grow in many ways. We have been together for 11 years and this year marks our 8th year of marriage.
/r/RedPillWives27/06/18 06:29 PM
2

Waist training has worked well for me too. Too bad my waist trainers leave bruises. OP, make it a priority to take care of yourself. Drink plenty of water, eat a healthy diet and exercise. Wear flattering clothing and make up. Style your hair in a flattering way. Comparing yourself to other women is a surefire way to be very unsatisfied with your appearance. No matter what you look like, there will always be a woman who is more attractive.
/r/RedPillWives24/06/18 05:50 PM
1

Absolutely. I always hold my tongue when I see selfish parents.
/r/RedPillWives24/06/18 05:16 PM
1

Exactly! I try to be as supportive as possible when it comes to other women's choices. I admit that I do not think highly of parents who constantly put their careers and leisure activities above their children's needs.
/r/RedPillWives24/06/18 02:49 PM
1

I honestly believe that some of the flack which DW receive stems from jealousy. Other women are jealous of housewives so they overcompensate by putting us down. The most precious commodity is time because time is finite and cannot be bought. Women who are free to stay at home have more time to ourselves and this annoys other women. I lost many friends when I became a housewife but it was a blessing. Now I have cultivated a group of friends who are open minded enough to understand that every woma…
/r/RedPillWives24/06/18 03:03 AM
3

Hi Laney! I'm so glad that you're courting a great man. It's wonderful that he supports your family. What does this man really enjoy? Start from there.
/r/RedPillWives23/06/18 03:17 AM
1

I would cancel if I was in your position. Tell him you're not comfortable with going to his house. Next him if he pressures you.
/r/RedPillWives20/06/18 11:58 PM
5

At this early stage, dates should be public because going to a man's private home is often interpreted as a signal of being open to sex.
/r/RedPillWives19/06/18 01:40 PM
1

A red pill man is not going to be happy with a woman who lacks feminine receptiveness. I see a lot of stubborn pride in your post and I completely understand your approach because I used to be the same way. It seems like you are fearful of being controlled and engulfed. You are not obligated to take any advice which you do not agree with. However, it could be helpful to think about how you might be perceived within the framework of a healthy and happy red pill relationship. Being able to yield t…
/r/RedPillWives06/04/18 12:54 AM
5

I pray my Rosary every day. It is calming and meditative. My husband and I have an evening ritual. I greet him at the door with kisses. Then we lie down and cuddle as we discuss our days.
/r/RedPillWives06/04/18 12:34 AM
2

It can be very difficult to overcome learned behavior because our childhood examples strongly imprint on our psyches. The fact that you are looking for help shows willingness to change. I grew up seeing my mother scream at my father constantly. She was usually berating him or putting him down. I recreated this awful dynamic in my marriage until I started to see a therapist and swallowed the red pill. Because there are no more power struggles, there are far less arguments. On the rare occasions t…
/r/RedPillWives27/03/18 02:16 AM
2

My husband insists on preparing his own breakfast so I make sure that I always look cute when he comes home. He prefers me without make up so I just apply lip balm and a little mascara. I wear lingerie if I know we're both in the mood for sex or I wear a dress.
/r/RedPillWives25/03/18 02:45 AM
3

I hope your husband provides the positive validation which is so important. I wouldn't want you to keep feeling unappreciated.
/r/RedPillWives24/03/18 02:40 PM
4

I used to swear like a sailor and shout whenever I was angry which was fairly often. That was before I realized how disgusting, unfeminine and uncultured I sounded. What helped me was being quieter and thinking before I spoke. I spent more time in silence pondering the impact of my words, as well as whether or not words were even necessary. We women tend to talk way too much. I've also learned to speak softly as well. I would advise you to do away with the belief that profanity is good for a per…
/r/RedPillWives24/03/18 02:33 PM
10

Submission in a marriage is about trust and acceptance. A man will resist any attempts to change him no matter how reasonable the needs are. All we can as wives is let our husbands know what would make us happy and trust that they will do their best.
/r/RedPillWives21/03/18 07:47 PM
7

I honestly believe that the parent who is at home with the children should do more childcare. The other parent is doing their part with earning the income. This doesn't mean that the working parent shouldn't do any parenting duties though. I use the word "parent" because sometimes men stay home with children although that is typically not what Red Pilled couples agree on. The problem is that so many women today have entitlement issues.
/r/RedPillWives21/03/18 07:35 PM
2

You're so wise for your age.
/r/RedPillWives21/03/18 07:29 PM
1

Being heavily pregnant is certainly a reason to ask for help and you are still determined to do your duties. What an admirable attitude!
/r/RedPillWives21/03/18 07:27 PM
7

Sometimes we have hidden resentments. I'm sensing that emotion in your posts and wording but I could be wrong. I don't believe that happy obedience comes with expecting your husband to help out with chores when you are home. Have you discussed your husband's expectations? Maybe you need hired help or he needs to dial back his rules. Organization may also be a challenge.
/r/RedPillWives21/03/18 04:45 PM
6

You can always do most of your work during the week and then rest on the weekends. If you are organized, it's easy to make a schedule and follow it so that you don't have to do very much at the end of the week. It's only the two of you now so I'm having a hard time understanding how you have so much housework to do. You don't need to clean your house or cook every day, unless your husband won't eat leftovers and you do a lot of messy activities. I'm sensing some resentment of your duties which i…
/r/RedPillWives20/03/18 04:57 PM
6

Pregnancy or other medical concerns are completely valid reasons for requesting assistance as a housewife. Other than that, everyone in the household needs to contribute in some way.
/r/RedPillWives20/03/18 01:46 AM
14

I agree with your husband. Whomever is not working outside the home needs to work within it. If he is earning the income, you need to step up as the housewife. Remember that you are very blessed to be in this position and you need to show appreciation. I am a housewife. My husband does outdoor chores and he takes out the garbage. He also INSISTS on cleaning up the kitchen after I cook. I don't like that because I believe the domestic sphere is my domain.
/r/RedPillWives20/03/18 01:44 AM
2

Sorry...did that wrong.
/r/RedPillWives18/03/18 01:20 AM
3

Early Childhood Education would be the perfect career because you could always run a small daycare in your home while taking care of your own kids. I don't know what ECE is called in the American education system.
/r/RedPillWives03/03/18 05:25 PM
2

Ah! Okay. Now I get it.
/r/RedPillWives01/03/18 02:54 PM
3

I agree! A clean home and a good meal is how I show love to my husband.
/r/RedPillWives01/03/18 02:54 PM
2

How is "dressing like a slut" the definition of flattering attire? Just as you illustrated, a woman can dress beautifully without dressing in a very revealing manner.
/r/RedPillWives01/03/18 12:06 AM
4

While I believe that your assumption could certainly be true, it doesn't seem the OP is dressing in a sloppily. Based on what she has posted, her husband simply wants her to dress in a more revealing way.
/r/RedPillWives28/02/18 09:35 PM
4

Marriage is about compromise. Try dressing sexy on date nights and around the house.
/r/RedPillWives28/02/18 08:18 PM
6

Let's not feed the troll, ladies. Just report him.
/r/RedPillWives28/02/18 08:17 PM
1

We rarely go to the city. It's too far, the traffic is awful and parking is a nightmare.
/r/RedPillWives27/02/18 03:42 PM
1

We're about 1.5 hours from the big city we lived in. I never thought that I would enjoy the slower pace of life but now I can't imagine moving back to a huge city.
/r/RedPillWives27/02/18 04:45 AM
1

This is very true. Nothing is worth more than peace of mind and a happy home.
/r/RedPillWives27/02/18 03:09 AM
2

I agree with this. Our lifestyle improved dramatically when we moved to a much smaller and less expensive city. It's more like an overgrown farming community and we live on the outskirts.
/r/RedPillWives27/02/18 03:06 AM
1

I love to read. I also love to research different topics and vacation destinations. Cleaning is very therapeutic for me and I enjoy looking up different recipes. I'm very excited to start my classes as well.
/r/RedPillWives27/02/18 03:04 AM
3

I find myself feeling exceptionally proud when my husband comes home to the smell of dinner cooking, a clean home and a happy wife. I'm not sure why such simple things make me so glad.
/r/RedPillWives27/02/18 02:56 AM
1

We haven't bought her yet but thanks a lot.
/r/RedPillWives26/02/18 03:28 AM
2

I see. We all have chores that we hate.
/r/RedPillWives26/02/18 03:27 AM
1

I do not work part time. However, I have very high standards for cleanliness so I spent more time cleaning than most people. I will be taking online courses to earn my BA in April. We are also buying a Bengal cat in November and they need a lot of attention.
/r/RedPillWives26/02/18 02:34 AM
2

Do you feel that housework is beneath you due to your education level?
/r/RedPillWives26/02/18 02:30 AM
2

It's always great to have passive income. I invest in an ETF. I put in a small amount every month.
/r/RedPillWives26/02/18 12:46 AM
5

When people tell me that I must be bored as a housewife, my reply is always "Boredom is for stupid people. There's always something to do." It shuts them up immediately. LOL
/r/RedPillWives26/02/18 12:44 AM
3

Date men who seem chivalrous and old fashioned. Bring up the topic of being housewife when a future is being discussed. Before that, drop hints about how much you love domesticity.
/r/RedPillWives26/02/18 12:43 AM
8

I agree. My marriage improved dramatically once I became a housewife. Our house is spotless, my cooking is much better and I am less stressed which makes me a happier wife. Sometimes having a career can be expensive in different ways. The commuting costs alone would be over $500 a month if I worked. I would also need clothing to work in a downtown office.
/r/RedPillWives25/02/18 07:28 PM
2

I'm so happy for you!
/r/RedPillWives13/02/18 04:01 AM
1

There's nothing wrong with having a baby at 25 within marriage or impending matrimony. Congratulations!
/r/RedPillWives08/02/18 03:35 AM
5

I don't think it's wise to start having babies after 40. Even pregnancy after 35 comes with many risks for the mother and baby. Biology doesn't care about feminism.
/r/RedPillWives08/02/18 03:34 AM
1

I struggle with this because I have OCD which manifests itself with cleaning. My house looks like a museum and I don't feel comfortable with anything out of place.
/r/RedPillWives03/02/18 02:21 AM
1

This article is about punishing all men for unequal pay or the actions of rapists. I don't agree with that at all.
/r/RedPillWives01/02/18 09:00 PM
2

I told him that I handled that particular issue myself and he let me know that he was not pleased. I apologized and let my husband handle the problem. I also gave him a lot of praise when he fixed it himself and told him he was right. My tactic is to remember that he is the Captain and our relationships is happier when we both embrace traditional values. I also think about the way my mother emasculated my father and how that ruined their marriage. They are still together but desperately unhappy.
/r/RedPillWives26/01/18 04:37 PM
3

I know how you feel. My husband likes to tell me that he'll handle things. I'm ashamed to admit that I used to go behind his back and handle the issue myself. Thankfully, I've learned my lesson. I will never disrespect my husband like that again. I think you need to learn to trust your husband and surrender to him....especially when he convinces you that he can deal with whatever the problem is. It's hard to be submissive but it will certainly improve your marriage. When your husband says "I'll …
/r/RedPillWives24/01/18 12:03 AM
4

Slave owners were actually committing evil deeds. Every man is Hollywood is not a perverted pig who enjoys seeing female actors being paid less. Slavery cannot be compared to post modernist hatred of men. As a Black woman, I'll have you know that your comment was completely disgusting and ignorant. You don't know who is on the other side of the screen so watch your mouth.
/r/RedPillWives23/01/18 04:08 PM
2

This is very true. However, I was focusing on the fact that WHC was being honest about how he felt as a man given the political climate in Hollywood these days.
/r/RedPillWives23/01/18 04:28 AM
4

I have asked my husband to be more romantic by planning dates and surprising me with little gifts once in a while. He promised to do so but never came through. At first, I was very angry with him but then I realized that I was wrong. I apologized to my husband for trying to turn him into someone that he was not. He insisted on becoming more romantic despite neglecting do so in the past. Today, he surprised me with a very sweet card and a receipt for a subscription to my favorite magazine was ins…
/r/RedPillWives21/01/18 02:00 AM
2

I'm very pleased to read your update! You're going to love cross country skiing. Just remember to wear layers as you will sweat profusely. Take a lesson if you've never done it before. The scenery will be beautiful. Winter walking is wonderful ! (Yaay alliteration! LOL) It's very invigorating. I love doing it. I find that when I dress for the cold, it doesn't bother me very much.
/r/RedPillWives21/01/18 01:57 AM
4

I don't trust men who are willing to throw their gender under the bus to win favor with feminists.
/r/RedPillWives19/01/18 02:36 AM
14

She should not have gone to a man's home on the first date. Going to a stranger's house soon after meeting him is a great way to put ourselves in dangerous situations. Of course, feminists do not think that women are responsible for our decisions. They just want to vilify men as much as they can.
/r/RedPillWives17/01/18 12:35 AM
5

Do you have any hobbies that you could enjoy while your husband needs his alone time? We cannot expect our husbands to entertain us all the time or be everything to us. It's still important to develop your own life outside of marriage with hobbies and friendships.
/r/RedPillWives17/01/18 12:25 AM
1

I'm guessing that you feel anxious about your husband's need for alone time because of what it may reflect about your marriage. Remember that his need for solitude isn't about a lack of love for you.
/r/RedPillWives17/01/18 12:23 AM
5

It's reasonable if he's an introvert. My husband is very introverted. We spend time together in the evenings and then he goes to basement to watch sports. I try not to bother him during that time because I know that my husband needs time to decompress.
/r/RedPillWives16/01/18 05:29 PM
3

Embracing winter sports has helped me with the winter blahs. Maybe winter sports could help you too. My husband and I love Nordic skiing. It's a great workout and the scenery is beautiful. I completely understand why you feel that this arrangement would hurt your relationship. I couldn't do it. I would also wonder why my husband would encourage separate living arrangements. Don't listen to your feminist friends. I ended friendships with staunch feminists when I became a housewife because they ke…
/r/RedPillWives15/01/18 01:35 AM
2

I love this compromise.
/r/RedPillWives15/01/18 01:12 AM
1

I just migrated from RedPillWomen and the difference is remarkable. The moderators are quite snippy over there. It wasn't a welcoming environment.
/r/RedPillWives11/01/18 02:28 AM
1

We took our first international trip in 2017. We went to London and Paris. It was so romantic and wonderful. My husband took a vacation day on Monday so that we could go Nordic skiing. It was so much fun! My husband looks sexy in his ski gear and it was lovely to have him take pride in how well I was doing since he was teaching me how to Nordic ski.
/r/RedPillWives11/01/18 02:19 AM
7

I was raised this way too. I also saw how embracing traditional roles renewed my marriage.
/r/RedPillWives11/01/18 02:17 AM
1

It is unfair to expect that for sure...but sometimes love changes people. My husband and I never wanted to get married until we met each other.
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/18 11:45 PM
7

Giving constantly without getting anything in return is a fool's errand when it comes to romantic relationships. It's a great way to be taken for granted.
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/18 11:42 PM
5

I did not advocate an ultimatum. Ultimatums are not a good way to relate to others. I simply encouraged the OP to be practical and think strategically. Giving a man all the benefits of marriage without the commitment is not a smart choice if a woman wants to be a wife. Femininity is not about being a pushover either. I don't believe that women should not exercise power over their own lives when it comes to personal goals which include relationships. A woman should not try to control a man or for…
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/18 11:40 PM
1

I agree. This is why it's not a good idea to bring children into poverty.
/r/RedPillWives10/01/18 07:01 PM
4

I am a first generation Canadian. My personal experience is that immigrant families are typically red pilled but only if they are very ambitious with a strong work ethic. I was raised to be domestic, feminine and nurturing; my mother began to teach me how to take care of a household when I was 10 years old.
/r/RedPillWives10/01/18 07:00 PM
1

-No nagging. -No harping on the past. This has been an issue for me for years. I finally stopped doing that because I realized that holding a grudge was childish and unhelpful. -Always apologize when you're wrong.
/r/RedPillWives10/01/18 06:55 PM
6

The OP is being very nurturing to her boyfriend which is quite feminine. She is adding value to his life in this way. She is also making their sex life a priority. The OP is being traditional yet she is also sharing financial responsibilities. Her boyfriend is getting the best of both worlds. It seems like he's receiving many benefits from her without making the commitment of marriage. Do you think that's a good way for women to approach long term relationships? I'm genuinely interested in your …
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/18 03:26 PM
3

The OP shared exactly what her boyfriend said and who he said it to: his girlfriend and his friend. Just to make sure that I understand, are we not permitted to point out when someone makes a comment which may not be kind?
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/18 03:16 PM
5

Is it possible that your boyfriend would like you to be more open and vulnerable? Maybe that's what he meant. I think it's wise to be cautious about showing too much vulnerability right away. Less scrupulous types will use that against you. Is your boyfriend vulnerable with you?
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/18 01:54 AM
7

Your boyfriend's comment was cruel. Does he make other nasty comments about your appearance? It's concerning that you are already worrying about so many plastic surgery procedures at your age.
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/18 01:34 AM
3

I don't have kids so I can't speak about those particular difficulties. Can you find other moms to do a childcare swap with? If not, is your husband willing to help out once a week so that you can have some me time? My mother was very bitter and angry because she was exhausted from working full time and raising four children. I'm sure she would have been a happier woman if she had more help.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 11:01 PM
16

It seems like marriage is important to you but not to him. I think the relationship has run its course since you do not have the same values. I hope that you don't waste your best years waiting for a man who is never going to commit. It doesn't take four years to decide if marriage is in the cards. Move out. Stop doing domestic tasks for him. Tell him that you're leaving because the two of you aren't on the same page about marriage. Never move for a man who isn't your husband or at least your fi…
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 10:58 PM
8

I've had other women call me high maintenance just because I get manicures every two weeks and I go to a spa for facials once in a while. I also dress well. I don't see what's so unusual or weird about wanting to look nice.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 10:32 PM
5

Any RPW wants to be hot because it increases SMV.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 10:28 PM
2

I was thinking this but I didn't want to jump to that conclusion.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 10:27 PM
3

Great points about the difference between natural makeup and no makeup/
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 06:58 PM
5

I'm wondering if those who describe you as "high maintenance" are just as mindful as their appearance as you are. It doesn't seem like you are taking steps with are out of the ordinary. Keep on working toward your goals.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 05:44 PM
3

Aging gracefully is always better than desperately clinging to youth. Mutton should not be dressed like lamb.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 02:03 AM
1

Not to mention the fact that most men do not want to marry party girls.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 01:59 AM
5

I agree with this. My husband is very introverted to the point of being misanthropic. Consequently, he has a reputation for keeping to himself at work. He never attended any corporate functions before I finally persuaded him to bring me to one of them. My husband's boss asked us to sit at his table and we had many enjoyable conversations. I am far more social than my husband. His coworkers loved me and so did his boss. After that party, my husband received an excellent raise and I think I may ha…
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 01:57 AM
11

A pre nup should not leave you penniless in the event of a divorce. When a woman is presented with a prenup, she needs to make sure that she finds her own lawyer who will review the document. She also needs to negotiate for more money if possible. Prenups aren't meant to be ironclad; they are often revised a few times especially after marriage when they become post nups. We had nothing when we got married seven years ago. We have more assets now but my husband has not mentioned a post nup.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 01:35 AM
2

I agree with this and I'm a Black woman. My parents have been married for over 40 years. Social class often determines whether or not a Black person will fit negative racial stereotypes. OOW children are typically born to parents who are working class and lack post secondary education.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/18 11:49 PM
2

Nobody was implying that you or any other feminist is a "demon." That statement is hyperbolic. RPW is an anti feminist community so none of the members are required to censor ourselves in order to soothe the hurt feelings of feminists.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/18 11:41 PM
1

I was in your shoes when I was much younger though certainly not to the same extent. I grew up in a home where I was physically and emotionally abused. I left home at a young age due to the abuse and having overly strict parents. They constantly accused me of being promiscuous even though that was not the case. I made up for all the experiences I missed out on with the opposite sex and sometimes I made poor choices. They were great learning experiences. I made sure that I didn't take any paths w…
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/18 04:27 AM
2

I think it's perfectly relevant that you mentioned your youth and beauty because women are known to be competitive about such things. However, your youth and beauty may not have been the real reasons why your boss let you go. I believe it could have been the argument about politics as well as taking too long to complete a task. When women gave me a hard time in the workplace, I tried to minimize my interactions with them as much as possible. I also stayed positive and documented anything which s…
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/18 04:02 AM
2

INFJ
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/18 03:37 AM
2

Well, I don't even know who you are so I can't possibly exclude or set out to hurt you. My statement still stands. The vast majority of feminists do not like RPW or traditional women. I am entitled to my opinions which are based on my experiences. You are free to react to my words as you see fit. I don't feel torn down by your response but it's nice that you weren't trying to do that. What I do feel is rather nonplussed that you would take offense to a statement which wasn't even specifically di…
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/18 03:36 AM
3

I see. I'm glad you explained what you meant.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:29 PM
1

I have been very clear about the need for post secondary education so I am not sure why you are referring to me. I choose not to have children but I will be a student for many years in order to train for a new career.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 05:28 PM
3

I don't discuss my traditional values with feminists because there's no point in it. They aren't interested in learning about our way of life and they typically enjoy tearing us down. I would suggest cultivating friendships with women who have similar beliefs. This might mean making older friends. Use your social media accounts to find like minded women as well.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 12:35 AM
6

How did the OP tear down feminists or dictate what other women should do?
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 12:32 AM
1

I agree. During the recession, it was much easier for me to find work then it was for my husband. He suffered emotionally but I'm glad that we pulled through.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/18 12:24 AM
2

Be careful about which men to show vulnerability to. Cads will take advantage of vulnerable woman who are too needy. Take things slow. Be so busy with your own life that you don't have time to be clingy. Cultivate friendships and independent interests. Keep a journal so that you can learn to examine your feelings as well as the motivations behind your relationships.
/r/RedPillWomen31/12/17 01:49 AM
1

When do you plan on marrying your fiance? I've been with my husband for 10 years and we've been married for 7. The best advice I have is to be appreciative and pleasant to be around. Make him want to come home to you every evening. Keep paying attention to your appearance and make your sexual relationship a priority.
/r/RedPillWomen31/12/17 01:46 AM
2

My husband and I have great discussions about history, the news and literature. I agree with the monetary aspect. We struggled during the recession and there were times that I was working but my husband was not. I am not a mother so perhaps I should not say this...but I think it's imperative to set an admirable example for children. I feel like a child is more likely to follow a parent's example rather than listening to what a parent says.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/17 06:42 PM
3

There is a difference between typical use and perfect use though. Perfect use of condoms along with a hormonal method makes a surprise pregnancy nearly impossible. When my husband and I were having sex while we were dating, the condom broke twice and both times we immediately ran to the drugstore for Plan B. I agree that birth control is not fullproof but I don't believe that pregnancy is not preventable is this day and age. This is a moot point since the OP is pregnant and intends to carry her …
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/17 01:00 AM
3

I believe TSW works very well as a companion piece. Both works discuss similar values although FW expands on certain topics far more. I have both books.
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/17 12:37 AM
2

I love that book. Assignment Two and Three resonate with me because I've had to accept some hard truths about myself and the way I relate to my husband.
/r/RedPillWomen27/12/17 04:45 AM
7

No need to collect numbers because there will always be other men. Approach dating with a mindset of abundance.
/r/RedPillWomen22/12/17 08:55 PM
3

I focused on work and keeping a journal to process my feelings about my experiences. I also firmly turned down any men who asked for dates instead of relenting because they were handsome and seemed nice.
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/17 08:59 PM
5

It was not a surprise at all. My proposal was awful for other reasons though. I accepted it because I loved my husband. We've been married for 7 years and I'm over it now. My husband wants to propose to me again for our 10th anniversary. He also wants to buy me new rings to commemorate 10 years of marriage. I'm over the bad proposal but my husband still feels guilty about it.
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/17 08:58 PM
4

Congratulations! Don't get caught up in The Wedding Industrial Complex. I can't understand why those who are not wealthy have huge and expensive weddings. Have a small wedding of 50 or less if a huge wedding isn't a priority to you. I have other money saving tips for weddings and I will PM them to you if you wish. Let me know. All couples go through difficulties. It's your commitment to each other and the marriage that will withstand the tests. Keep your in-laws at an arm's length when it comes …
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/17 04:51 PM
1

Yes, I don't hate everything that my mother did as a parent.
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/17 11:35 PM
2

I wanted to share a particular situation with you which perfectly illustrates your points. I had a dear friend who was so smart that she could have become a doctor. Sadly, she became a mother at 17 and dropped out of high school. Her child's father had his flaws but at least he stayed with her unlike other teenage boys. She cheated on him in their bed with someone she worked with and then left her boyfriend for a man who could shower her with expensive gifts. The well heeled man married her whil…
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/17 04:27 PM
2

My mother and I are not close but she brags to everyone that I am a "proper woman" because of how clean I keep our home. That makes me feel good because my mother rarely compliments me. She usually insults me.
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/17 04:19 PM
4

I love your posts. You always make good points.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 10:10 PM
2

Absolutely concur with all of your points. One of the reasons I'm finally completing my BA is I'm not comfortable with being married to a Professional Engineer without it. I also have career goals which would lead to a goal which I have always dreamed of; one where I can set my own hours and help others. Attractiveness is also a factor which I didn't even think of so thanks for bringing up that great point. Maybe my husband doesn't mind that I have not finished university because he keeps saying…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 10:06 PM
3

I agree with you. I find it hard to take people seriously when they argue that education in any form is not necessary or important.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 09:56 PM
7

You still have not addressed my comment about formal education not being solely received from college professors. Explain how a hairstylist apprenticeship, culinary studies and PSW/CNA courses include feminist indoctrination. That's right. You can't. Early Childhood Education is filled mainly with female students who want to enhance their maternal instincts with formal education. Once again, there are many courses in which adding feminist indoctrination would be impossible or incongruent at best…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 09:53 PM
2

I just upvoted you. Hope that helps. I don't think everyone is aware of the etiquette or follows it. People downvote just to be petty.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 09:18 PM
3

How would you explain the amount of anti feminists who happen to be highly educated then? Phyllis Schlafly and Janet Bloomfield come to mind.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 09:15 PM
4

Formal education does not need to include instruction from college professors. The ability to push any agenda depends entirely on course content.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 08:13 PM
1

Not every single mom is bitter towards couples so I agree with you. I'm glad that you have had a better experience. I should be more open minded.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 07:58 PM
5

I agree with you wholeheartedly. That is why I am returning to university in the spring of 2018. I have completed college but I want to do even more. Maybe I shouldn't say this because I am not a mother....but I certainly agree that it's important to set a good example for children in every way. Being willfully uneducated is not a good example. I know there are barriers to receiving formal qualifications such as finances. However, that isn't the same as perpetuating the belief that education bey…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 07:13 PM
8

I love your personal experience about how formal education added to your life. I feel that any kind of formal education only enhances a woman's life-apprenticeships, certificates, degrees, diplomas and trades are all valuable. I admire you for being adept at biology and chemistry. I surprised myself by getting a B in a difficult biology course in college. I have always been terrible at science and math.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 07:07 PM
1

I believe that social graces are important and also lost in our society. Women who possess these skills are often sought out by others. The biggest challenge is keeping social graces when other people are rude. I deal with that by distancing myself from those types and also taking the time to think about why they behave the way they do. It puts things into perspective. I was told that going to my husband with situations that bother me shows a lack of social grace but I think that's ludicrous. Ma…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 05:50 PM
11

It's not an odd question at all. I'm very fussy about the neatness of my home and the quality of the food I serve. I view my homemaking duties as a career so I take my duties very seriously. It doesn't help that I have been diagnosed with OCD so I am obsessively neat.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 05:31 PM
1

No, I wouldn't. I'm glad that you mentioned that branch of feminism to me though.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 05:22 PM
2

You're welcome, hon.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 05:15 PM
1

You're welcome, dear.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 05:15 PM
5

What a beautiful story! It's WHEN you get married. Don't sell yourself short.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 08:09 AM
2

I certainly think that you're on to something here. I was an "independent woman" and I enjoy being a housewife far more. "Having it all" is a myth. The woman who was angry about wine is addicted to four substances, which is an indicator of unhappiness with some part of her life.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 08:05 AM
1

There are ways to give constructive criticism without personal attacks. For example, another poster mentioned the possibility that I am snobbish and holier than thou. As you can see, I did not react poorly to that comment because it wasn't an attack on my character and the way I handle situations in my marriage. It appears that you feel that harshness is allowed as long as you agree with the person who is being harsh. I'm new so maybe I don't understand what's going on. Politeness goes both ways…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 08:03 AM
5

This is great advice. It's important for men to be trusted by their loves. I needed to read this today because my husband and I plan on moving within 5 years. I wanted to wait another year after that to improve our financial situation even more but my husband is very much against that idea. Looking back, I realize that insisting that we wait another year probably hurt my husband's pride. I'll have to apologize and reassure him that I trust his judgement. Thanks for the reminder!
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 04:02 AM
4

One of my dear friends ignored red flags because of social pressure to marry and have children. Her husband turned out to be an emotionally abusive cheater and they are in the midst of a very messy divorce. She is already in another relationship. I wish I could share this with her but I don't want to hurt her feelings. I think my friend needs to be alone for at least a year and heal. When I was single, I went through a phase of being a radical feminist because of my upbringing as well as being h…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 03:57 AM
3

I feel that it is a reasonable expectation to want emotional support from our Captains-particularly during very trying times. Speak from the heart. Acknowledge that he might be grieving too. Tell him what you need without criticizing him for not being more open. I'm so sorry for you loss, darling. hug
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 03:44 AM
1

I can't say that monetary concerns are not valid because I have been poor. I lived in poverty after leaving an abusive home. My husband and I struggled for years after the recession hit us hard. Being poor makes everything very difficult. Sure, we were privileged compared to those living in the third world but that doesn't mean that we were not scraping by in the first world. I'm glad that you want to be online pals. I look forward to getting to know you.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 02:05 AM
3

When you know that you have not been bragging or talking down to someone, rest assured that "You think you're better than me!" is just projection of their insecurities on to you. This fool knows damn well that you are a much better lady than she will ever be and that hurts her. Keep on being polite and keep your distance. Congrats on the engagement!
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:44 AM
3

I don't think it makes sense to show a man the joys of a domestic woman until he makes a firm commitment. Men will use women who give them too much domesticity right away. I learned not to cook or clean for men unless they courted me and we were a couple.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:38 AM
3

I love this advice and it's very true. My husband was used to having sex with women after 1-3 dates. I held out for 2 months because I learned the hard way that having sex too soon can cause a lot of problems.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:36 AM
3

Low self esteem will lead women to make terrible choices in all aspects of her life. Men who are predatory users can sniff out low self esteem very easily. I know because I had that problem for a long time.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:34 AM
1

I believe that men respect a woman with some kind of ambition. It only becomes a problem if a woman uses her ambitions as a reason to be masculine or a man hater. My husband is thrilled that I am interested in returning to university. He doesn't care what I do with my degree but he's glad that I want to improve myself.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:28 AM
4

This is so true and I experience it all the time. I don't even like having single moms as friends unless they were married before and they are not struggling financially.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:25 AM
1

I think it can be a challenge to find a balance between allowing freedom and asserting ourselves in a feminine way. Everyone should have their space though.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:24 AM
1

I don't blame you for distancing yourself. I have done the same thing. It's disrespectful to take shots at someone's loved ones...regardless of how one might feel about them.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:15 AM
2

Wow, you are so right. Time is the most valuable commodity in the world and most of us have to spend much of it doing things we hate. When I spoke of "wealth", I was speaking purely in monetary terms. I will read and comment on your blog. We can become online pals. Thanks for the lovely response.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:14 AM
1

Thank you so much. Apparently, I lack social graces because I brought this to my husband's attention. We're a couple who shares joy and pain with each other. Imagine that! LOL
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:09 AM
1

As soon as you mentioned being snobby or holier than thou, I knew that an angry rant was about to follow. Since you are the only person who has attacked me in this thread, I am going to take some of your advice and realize that your response says more about you than me. My Captain doesn't mind listening to me when I have a problem. I guess that's because he loves me enough to care when something bothers me. I'm sorry that you don't understand that. It's strange that no other subscriber who has p…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 01:07 AM
2

You're right about not being able to change or control other people's behavior. With respect to boasting, I am VERY careful about not flaunting certain aspects of my lifestyle. I think it's gauche to brag about money; that behavior is very tacky. I don't like to discuss certain things with the less fortunate. It's rude. I was bullied by female family members and female coworkers. Because of that, I am very wary of most women.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/17 12:05 AM
3

I'm typically introspective. My former therapist told me that sometimes I take too much responsibility for other people's behavior. The schism began as soon as I became a housewife and embraced anti feminism. To be honest, my former friends behaved in a snobby manner towards me after I made these choices; it was as if I was a simpleton just because I didn't work outside the home. I carry myself a certain way and I have high standards for many aspects of my life. If those characteristics make me …
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 10:28 PM
1

I certainly have insecurities but I don't manage them by putting down others. I must say that I am much happier since getting rid of those fools. I posted this thread to vent about my past and recent experiences. I don't talk to those women anymore.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 10:07 PM
9

I am childfree. My life is wonderfully fulfilling. There are many women who cannot have children and I certainly don't believe that their lives are waste just because they cannot reproduce.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 09:33 PM
5

I am a Black woman and I feel that the feminist movement is very racist and classist. Each wave of feminism has focused on the rights of affluent and educated white women.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 09:24 PM
2

I get lots of flack for being childfree. One of the friends I cut off said that I needed to have a baby to keep me company. She changed her mind about being childfree but she wants to be one of those mothers who barely raises her child. I am a member of many childfree groups but I find some of them a little bit hateful for my taste. I don't hate children and parents. Some childfree groups focus on denigrating parents and kids as much as possible. I was in a childfree housewife group but I left b…
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 09:23 PM
5

No. I am against feminism because I feel that the movement has sold women a bill of goods and feminism has also ruined relationships between men and women. I'm sorry that I wasn't clear about my group. There are members who are working women and most of them are moms. A housewife typically has children even if she doesn't use the "SAHM" acronym.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 09:20 PM
7

I just wish I could understand where the hate comes from. I'm not a mean woman. I don't brag about my lifestyle. I try to be cheerful and supportive.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 05:17 PM
2

Hi hon. Send me a PM and we'll talk about my group.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 05:15 PM
3

You're right. I never mentioned being an anti feminist to the woman who was angry at me. She saw that I started the group before I changed the setting to secret. I don't mind friends with different beliefs but being an anti feminist tends to rile up other women. I also had an atheist friend who was angry that I'm a Catholic. I think I need to make sure that my friends are mature enough to handle different belief systems.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 05:15 PM
1

You've raised an excellent point about jealous women planting seeds in our minds. We can easily be influenced by people around us if we're not careful. My Facebook group is secret because that keeps the riffraff out. To join, you would need to send me a friend request. We should probably get to know each other better before exchanging such personal information. Feel free to send me a PM. Looking forward to hearing from you.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 05:13 PM
5

I don't understand the point of being jealous of someone I care about. I'm always happy for my loved ones and I find their success inspiring. I'm not bored at all. I have my housework, reading and exercise to keep me busy. In 2018, I will begin riding lessons and I will become a dog owner. I am going to be very busy. It's treated as a crime to be traditional these days. Feminists have brainwashed women into thinking that traditionalism subjugates us. I have never felt more free than when I am un…
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 05:10 PM
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