| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 43 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbroken | Heavy-Interaction-47 | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 08:50 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | A year after my divorce, I noticed something funny.You can use Meetup to do this. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/06/26 06:29 PM |
| 6 | Anybody else have trouble dating after divorce?This !! I work out, cook, travel, read and do what I want when I don't have the kids. Yes, the nights can get lonely but for now I'm working on growing as a person. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/06/26 04:33 PM |
| 11 | May I ask what led to your divorce?25 yrs together, 23yrs married - She had an emotional affair that led to a physical affair with a guy I know. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/05/26 02:18 PM |
| 12 | Why Do I Miss Her?This is grief. It happens to everyone and happened to me yesterday. I found solace in this (It's attributed to Jim Carrey but there is no proof he actually said it) . Grief is not just an emotion—it’s an unraveling, a space where something once lived but is now gone. It carves through you, leaving a hollow ache where love once resided. In the beginning, it feels unbearable, like a wound that will never close. But over time, the raw edges begin to mend. The pain softens, but the imprint remains—a… | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/04/26 08:43 PM |
| 1 | My (30m) wife (35f) has told me she’s moving out next month, after 12 years married. Canada.I'd start with friends then google. Depending on the state and if the car is in your name, you could put a tracker on it... but ask an attorney because this can be considered stalking in many states. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/04/26 01:23 PM |
| 4 | My (30m) wife (35f) has told me she’s moving out next month, after 12 years married. Canada.This... My STBX said the exact same thing... come to find out a week later (I hired a PI as I had a gut feeling), she had been having an emotional affair with a person at the gym and that moved into a physical affair. What I would suggest is the following: Attorney Separation Agreement ASAP Therapy and do everything to make sure you/your kids are taken care of. You'll be dealing with a LOT of emotions in the coming months/years but try to listen to some positive podcasts (Alan Watts) and try to … | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/04/26 04:38 PM |
| 2 | What to say when asked about my divorce?My ex did the same. When asked I just say it's something private that happened between us. No one asks anything after that. Of course your best friends and family know the truth. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/03/26 12:24 AM |
| 4 | Wife agreed to work it out? Can I trust her to not change her mind?This!! Just because the can't afford it, she wants to stay... nope GTFO now or you'll be here in a year | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/03/26 11:40 AM |
| 2 | What did getting divorced teach you?Maybe but if you knew what you're already having to give up ($$) when the process started your emotional state would prob be better. You don't have to struggle, with therapy you can get your well being back. It's the not-knowing that kills most of us. I wish you well and hope that you can find some peace and happiness. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/03/26 12:04 PM |
| 8 | What did getting divorced teach you?Or get a prenup. Wish I had one | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/03/26 12:03 AM |
| 7 | Found the affair yesterdayI'm sorry brother. I've been there and the hurt is worse than anything you will ever experience. Get a therapist and start getting your affairs in order. You're going to have a lot of ups and downs but just know that this doesn't define who you are. It's not your fault. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/01/26 09:05 PM |
| 1 | Anyone ever send your in-laws proof your wife cheated?I've been thinking about this exact thing for weeks. I was just going to tell them that her new relationship isn't new and that's why the marriage ended....but what good will it do? Nothing. As others have said it's better just to move on with your life, if her parents have 2 brain cells to run together they already know or will figure it out. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/12/25 07:18 PM |
| 8 | So F’ing SadUnless she already has someone | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/12/25 01:37 AM |
| 1 | Alimony vs RetirementNot just the numbers but also if you're in a state that will void the alimony of she remarries or cohabitates. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/11/25 05:26 PM |
| 5 | Divorced Men, My wife cheat, we divorced, She’s happy, I’m sad. What is your advice?This guy is 💯 right. I have the same situation and you need therapy to help you through this process. You will go thru all different phases of grief, anger, hurt, resentment, etc. I'm still dealing with it and I have my good days and bad but I'm focusing on myself. I know 💯 that regardless of what happened in our marriage she would make the same choice again. She blew up a 23yr marriage for a boddie call, she will eventually have to deal with her own guilt and grief and will regret this decision… | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/10/25 02:07 PM |
| 3 | STBXW wants us to spend future christmas' togetherSay no then. Don't do it just because she asked. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/10/25 10:51 AM |
| 5 | STBXW wants us to spend future christmas' togetherMy STBX asked something similar and I said no. I don't want her in my life and the kids get 2 Christmases based on the custody schedule. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/10/25 10:30 AM |
| 3 | Giving/Receiving AdviceExactly. It's the quality of friends that count not the quantity. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/10/25 11:20 AM |
| 2 | It comes in waves💯. Music , smells, just driving by a place you've been.. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/10/25 04:57 PM |
| 3 | Giving/Receiving AdviceThere are 2 types of friends. Enablers - they will tell you want to hear and keep doing you. True friends - They listen, give advice and will be critical when needed. These are the ones you need . | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/10/25 04:53 PM |
| 1 | Wife after 26 years, wants to sell the house and walk away100%. And most are using IG, FB Messenger or a burner app | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/10/25 02:30 PM |
| 5 | Wife after 26 years, wants to sell the house and walk awayThere's always someone else. I was adamant there wasn't until my gut wouldn't let it go. Hired a PI and bingo found the AP. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/10/25 01:38 PM |
| 2 | I am not that specialcongratulations to you. What a great first step on your new journey. What did Therapy teach you? What's some advice you can share with others in a similar boat. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/09/25 12:58 AM |
| 1 | Feeling a return of despairI'm in a similar position. Just keep moving forward listen to some good podcasts about letting go, acceptance and how to heal. I've only been at this for 5 weeks and grief comes and goes. The journey will take a long time, so be kind to yourself, forgive yourself and allow yourself some grace. I understand everything you're going thru and share the pain, please know you're not alone. If you want to DM me feel free. Wishing you peace and love. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/09/25 02:48 PM |
| 1 | How do you deal with anniversaries and relationship milestones after leaving?Do you have any friends near by? | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/09/25 01:22 PM |
| 2 | How do you deal with anniversaries and relationship milestones after leaving?Same here..my 23rd anniversary is next month and not looking forward to a very strange holiday this year. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/09/25 08:05 PM |
| 2 | This process is weirdThis guy gets it. I'm only a month in after 23 yrs and it will take time to heal. Be kind to yourself, forgive yourself. You can learn a lot from Alan Watts teachings. https://youtu.be/8SBwy4oxW9s?si=RoBp90dgKX3t588Q | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/09/25 10:06 AM |
| 2 | The real fight in divorce isn't about the money or the blame. It's the internal shit no one talks about.Here are a couple of videos that I really like that are related to this. Most people don't understand love, they understand the idea of love but not what love truly is. https://youtu.be/cIDXwMoi3Kk?si=PcWRpBF6MqibaAoQ https://youtu.be/fshQ9DlPaow?si=m3vL9SSBiqo0NRPR | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/09/25 06:18 PM |
| 3 | The real fight in divorce isn't about the money or the blame. It's the internal shit no one talks about.This!!🙏🙏🙏 You're 💯 right. Great post. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/09/25 01:21 PM |
| 1 | I want to move on emotionally, but alimony won’t let meThere are plenty. I have friends who's ex remarried before it ended | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/09/25 08:04 PM |
| 1 | I want to move on emotionally, but alimony won’t let meIn Florida once they're married we can go back to court and get it eliminated. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/09/25 03:14 PM |
| 4 | I want to move on emotionally, but alimony won’t let meMy story is very similar. Married 23 yrs worked my ass off to build multiple successful companies and provide a lifestyle most people dream about. What I did wrong was neglect my marriage, I just keep working and providing not realizing my wife needed more. When she did tell me, I would change but it would only last for a few weeks because I didn't have the strategies I've found recently in therapy to truly show emotions and love. I'll be in the same boat but I'm not going to offer a lump sum in… | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/09/25 12:04 PM |
| 2 | How bad is it?This guy gets it!! | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/09/25 01:15 AM |
| 2 | Separation questionsIt will be hard, not going to lie. I'm in a similar boat. My wife asked for a divorce after 23 yrs, she has already decided this months if not years ago. It's like a running a marathon, she already finished the race, while we;re just starting. I started therapy and it's being a great emotional outlet. Luckily for me I have an amazing support group of family of friends (3 of my friends are going thru the exact same thing as me). Is there a support group in your area or even one you can join virtu… | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/08/25 03:40 PM |
| 3 | How did you all cope during a divorce? Feel absolutely broken.Invest in you. This is a life changing event and be kind to yourself. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/08/25 03:11 PM |
| 2 | How did you make sense of her walking away after years together?Not gonna lie - It will be hard and I have my first family event coming up in a couple of weeks. I have fear, guilt and extreme sadness already but we need to push back on this and don't let the past pull you back in. Every emotion is from the heart, the mind is just trying to control you. Don't let it. Listen to this podcaast if you have time. https://youtu.be/0LM4-TqhiaA?si=638saUFOywAd8OQM | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/08/25 05:24 PM |
| 1 | AbandonmentHonestly, this hit the nail on the head for me. https://youtu.be/0LM4-TqhiaA?si=eiYyTHymqcZ_ycyB I just finished his book and it was amazing. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/08/25 06:58 PM |
| 4 | How did you make sense of her walking away after years together?Mine refused counseling as well. A lot has to do with their age, per-menopause, hormones and mid-life crisis. I would do anything to save the marriage and have been working on being a better version of myself. Do they same, self love and be the joyful person people want to be around. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/08/25 11:38 AM |
| 2 | How did you make sense of her walking away after years together?I've been married 23 yrs, 3 kids and she wants out. I have t been the perfect husband but no cheating or abuse at all. I just wasn't the most affectionate, loving and was living with emotional incarceration on my end. Did you ask her why she's leaving? I'm sorry you're going thru this it's exhausting.and extremely hard to process. Go see a therapist and get a good support group. Each day is a journey my friend. Peace and love to you | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/08/25 10:15 AM |
| 3 | Two days from the hearingHang in there. I know it's easier said than done, hoping for the best for you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/08/25 09:58 PM |
| 1 | One month inI'm sorry for the late response. I would 100% do a separation agreement, I'm working on this with my wife. Please, please, please give this a listen - It changed how I think about myself and how we're trained as men to be emotionally incarcerated and living in solitary in our own mind. https://youtu.be/0LM4-TqhiaA?si=3aJkQc3iQICeMJZ2 - If you can't afford the book from Jason Wilson, drop me a DM and I will 100% buy it and send it to you. I've started reading it and I am him, he is us. Don't let … | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/08/25 03:25 PM |
| 2 | One month inFirst of all I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. Most of us in this sub are dealing with deep pain and hurt, it fkn sucks. I'm so sorry that you don't have a place to stay and that your STBX is not allowing you to see your daughter. I can't imagine the pain from this. Are there men's groups in your area that you can attend to assist with the emotional side of things? Depending on the state you live in you may or may not need a legal separation document. In FL both parties can draft one… | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/08/25 03:06 PM |
| 2 | Separation before figuring out divorceI believe counseling is different for every couple but they both have to be committed to doing it. I wish you the best and please keep us updated. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 02:58 PM |
| 1 | Separation before figuring out divorceThis is the exact thing my wife has been telling me. Im 52 married for 23 yrs and my wife asked for a divorce. She won't do any counseling but if your wife is willing to make an investment in your marriage, I would seriously consider that. If she won't then there's probably no hope. I wish my wife would do counseling as it could make us stronger, I'm doing my own therapy and working on myself. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 02:09 PM |
| 2 | Post Divorce Shower ThoughtsGive Mel Brooks a try. She;s great and there are some good guests on her show. Check out a book called the untethered soul. Not sure if they have divorce men support groups? | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/08/25 06:22 PM |
| 1 | Post Divorce Shower ThoughtsI feel for you brother. Stay strong, read some books and listen to some good positive mindset podcasts | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/08/25 02:11 PM |
| 6 | Post Divorce Shower ThoughtsSame thing here. 23 years of marriage looks like it's over. Not say I don't have any blame in it because I do, but she shows me videos from social media about taking back your life and being happy. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/08/25 02:10 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThis is great advice. I've started therapy for ME not for her but because I want to be a better me. I've started listening and reading on how to rewire the brain, neuroscience, meditation and how to upon your mind. The last few days have been difficult but I'm not going to pick up a bottle to drown my sorrows, I saw what it did to my friend for a year and I won't go down that road. I don't know where this journey will take me but I know it's okay to not be okay. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/08/25 12:22 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI'm glad to hear that your life is better | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/08/25 03:00 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI appreciate the honest response, thank you. I've been working out for the last few years and the gym has been my mental safe haven. I'll continue to do that and have already scheduled my therapist appt. I hope you've been able to find some peace and happiness along the way. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/08/25 11:23 AM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThanks for advice. I'm not worried about being along as I used to travel for work and don't mind that. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/08/25 06:49 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You. She;s going to be starting HRT soon | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/08/25 02:49 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenIt's hard to stop blaming myself because she told me so many times about her feelings and what I needed to change. I just didn't listen and/or would do it for a few weeks and then it would be status-quo. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/08/25 02:46 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You. I hope you've found peace and happiness again. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/08/25 01:00 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI really appreciate the response and I you're so right that I was putting my family first but I also neglected to see the pain I was causing her when she had been telling me about this for years. I used to change for a few weeks and then it was back to normal. I know I'm not perfect but am trying to build myself back into the man I want to be, no matter what happens. I will read up on perimenopause because she is 100% going thru this. Thank You again for your advice and I wish you nothing but th… | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/08/25 12:59 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenStay strong brother! One foot in front of the other and take it day by day, the hurt is unreal and I have so much guilt as well. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 08:55 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThanks man. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 08:38 PM |
| 3 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You for your advice. I've already started therapy and will keep at it until I become the man I want to be not for her but for me. I pretty much gave up drinking a few years ago and replaced it with the gym | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 08:37 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenCongratulations on being sober. I hope you've been able find happiness and love | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 06:04 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI really appreciate the honestly and am very happy that you're still together!! I've been working on myself and will continue to do so no matter what happens. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 05:11 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI'll start with the videos today. Thank You. May I ask if you're still married or? | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 04:38 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank you for the advice. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 04:37 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThanks for the advice and support. I hope you've found happiness as well | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 04:36 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI'm sorry you went thru this but am happy that you found love after. I appreciate your response and wish you nothing but the best with your new love | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 01:23 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You. WIll do | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 01:14 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThanks for responding and I hope you're in a better place now. As you're aware the daily struggle is real, I've never felt like this before in my life. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 12:11 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI 100% agree. I won't do this and will continue to financially support the household and kids until we decide what the next steps are. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 12:02 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenShe said it plenty of times. I just didn't listen to her needs | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 11:59 AM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI am planning to start next week and know in my heart no matter what happens it will be good for me | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 11:58 AM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI'm glad to see there are people with a positive outcome. Was your wife resistant at first about couples counseling? | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 11:58 AM |
| 3 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You brother and I'm sorry for your pain and hope that you've managed to find peace and love again. I've never thought about the "til death do us part" of wedding vows.. thanks for sharing that bit. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 11:56 AM |
| 3 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI'm sorry that you're having to deal with this, I know how hard it is. I hope and pray that you will find love and peace someday. Keep strong and keep moving forward. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/08/25 11:54 AM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI agree and wish you nothing but the best. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 10:50 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You brother. Unfortunately, I'm still in the guilt phase and you're right I need to move on. I will say she had asked me to change at least 10x over the years | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 10:50 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenOh, I'm so sorry man. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:43 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You and I'm sorry for everything that you're going through as well. I wish you nothing but the best and hopefully one day you'll be happy again. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:43 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You Brother. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:41 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI really don't think so but I guess I will all come out in the long run. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:41 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI appreciate the response and am so glad you found happiness. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:40 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenShe's been saying it for years. I don't "think" there is anyone else. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:39 PM |
| 2 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenThank You. She's 100% worth the fight. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:38 PM |
| 4 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI was and am 100% to blame. She has told me so many times over the years that I needed to be more loving and attentive. I took her for granted | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:38 PM |
| 1 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI don't think so since she is at home 90% of the day | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:37 PM |
| 3 | Divorcing after 23 yrs of marriage and I'm heartbrokenI'm 100% to blame. I should have shown her how I feel about her, I honestly was super lucky to have her in my life. As people have said to me "you married way above your range" and they're not wrong. I'm a fkn idiot | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/08/25 09:32 PM |
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