TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

HoneydewLeading7337 Archive

View 3 posts and 71 comments by HoneydewLeading7337 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
16

Absolutely fucking not. When we were together I loved her and I like her. The person she is now? I don't lover her and I don't like her. Why would I be friends with someone I don't like?
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/24 10:32 PM
8

I was working 2 jobs, 7 days a week for well over a year. She was unemployed. For well over a year. She spent her time smoking weed in the basement and talking to guys she wanted to fuck and arranging NSA sex with them (wanted an open marriage). I came home from job #2 (which was hard physical labor), after having done the grocery shopping too, and was getting ready to cook dinner (she didn't really cook), and had to do the dishes because she couldn't be bothered to take time away from getting h…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 02:19 AM
4

I genuinely wish her happiness. I don't get this. I dunno the specifics of your situation, obviously, but I can't ever see wishing my ex 'happiness.' I don't wish her catastrophic harm per se, but if she were to step on a rake every day from here on out, I'd be ok with that.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 06:03 PM
11

Has anyone been in this situation? Everyone here can relate. How the hell do you bring it to some kind of resolve? You get divorced. From your description it sounds like she's done. If that's the case there's simply no option moving forward that includes the two of you being together. It's unfair, but relationships can end either mutually or unilaterally. I'm sorry. Things are going to get worse in your life, and something that meant a lot to you is over. It's going to be very painful, but it's …
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/24 09:34 PM
3

^ this right here. Abandoners abandon. Cheaters cheat. Liars lie. Betrayers betray. The scorpion will sting the frog every time because it's his nature. I don't know what's wrong with some people that they get to be like this. The fact that they can live with themselves is just nothing short of shocking. All of that is to say, nothing you can do will prevent a horrible person from being horrible to you. It's the nature of abuse. Hell, I think we get singled out by these weirdos because they see …
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 02:32 AM
1

Not so sure about people, either.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 01:49 AM
6

Thanks for commenting and validating the observation. I'm not a misogynist. I think men do idiotic shit to ruin lives too. This is just a pattern that a lot of people are observing and it's impossible to ignore. In every single case I've seen of this, it happens in women who were a total mess as teenagers, and also had the baby rabies REAL fucking bad and made bad family planning choices. I think these are people who didn't learn how to regulate themselves during puberty and the same pattern jus…
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/24 12:36 AM
3

They say the opposite of love is indifference. I know what you're getting at with this, and you're not wrong. It's a very good goal to have for yourself. But things aren't that linear or binary. I'm indifferent insofar as I no longer care that she's a whore. It's not my problem. I don't care about her or her life any more than I would anybody else in the world. I don't wish her harm. If I could heal everyone at the hospital I would, because human misery sucks. I hate her for being an agent of hu…
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 02:33 PM
7

One thing that helped me at the stage you're at is the realization that only one person in the world could hurt you this much- and she did. As far as you are personally concerned she is now the worst person you know. She's done you more harm than anyone you've ever met. So when you have fond memories of her, remember that she betrayed all of that.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/24 09:23 PM
1

If things were good before the cult, (and I say this as someone who was raised in one), I suggest the following: -Find a therapist knowledgeable about cults. Psychology Today has some good resources for finding someone in your area. Have at least a session or two and ask for help coming up with a plan. -Follow the plan. Maybe it's an intervention? I dunno, I'm not qualified to say. -Communicate your observations about what's become of her and give her an ultimatum to choose the cult or the marri…
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 03:39 PM
2

Ha - that's a good point I never thought of!
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 01:26 AM
3

My wife left to be a poly swinger too. Like you she coerced me into the whole open marriage thing. Luckily I listened to my body and kicked her out before it got too far. It's a relief to talk to someone else who had that experience! People who haven't lived through it just do not get it. I was homeschooled and grew up in what most people would call a cult. I had to sort of deprogram myself in college. And this is a way bigger mindfuck than that was. Anyway, this poly crap is getting so normaliz…
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 06:53 PM
15

Stop talking to her. Go for a walk. Rub one out. This will solve about 80% of your problems.
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/24 05:41 PM
9

Look man, all actions have a rationale behind them. 'I'm out of food, I need to go to the store,' for example. The same applies to leaving a relationship. 'He is abusive/They are no longer attractive/they can't hold a job/they got terminally I'll and I don't want to deal with it,' whatever. The better a relationship is, the more absurd the rationale has to be. It took me a long time to figure this out. The rationales my ex gave were so stupid and bizarre. For a long time I was just confused by i…
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 01:54 PM
2

I wouldn't want to trade places with her. I'm just frustrated that I'm lonely and she's not.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/24 03:19 PM
2

You deserve real love, genuine connection, and healthy relationships. You deserve to be seen, heard and understood. You deserve to e valued, respected, and cherished. Then why do I not have any of those things in my life? To be clear, I did not deserve to be divorced. I was a good husband and I'm a great father. But my EW left to be a swinger and has lots of relationships. I have none. I'm bad at dating because it's not my skill set. Marriage was. I guess? The data would indicate that bad at tha…
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/24 11:02 PM
3

It's remarkable to me that there isn't more a of a community for people who have experienced and been traumatized by non monogamy. there so damn many of us casualties out here.
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 04:11 PM
1

How far into the open marriage shit did touk get dragged?
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 03:48 PM
8

I got dragged through opening the marriage and trying to live some gross poly swinger lifestyle for about a year before the divorce. She left lately because I could not live that way. She's a skaaaank. I was fully traumatized by sex for about a year after the divorce. It really screwed me up. No sex drive of any kind at all for a long time. It's kinda coming back, but I'm still grossed out by it all.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 01:02 AM
7

"She stopped tryin to get better and I stopped tryin to get worse" What I say when anyone asks why I'm divorced.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 06:09 PM
1

Say it louder for the people in the cheap seats. FUCK 'EM. These are garbage people. They have no shame. They have no moral compass. They have no power is that we don't give them. Fuck. Them.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 10:18 PM
4

For fuck's sake don't go. You dont have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. Your body your choice. If it upsets anyone - fuck 'em. Your daughter is the only one who matters, and as long as you celebrate her birthday with the fullness of your presence, she will feel loved. Your dumbass ex is the reason everyone is thrust into this mess. Any and all sadness, frustration, disappointment etc., can be delivered POD at that dipshit's feet. If anyone has the gall to criticize you for not going…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 07:29 PM
18

My ex pulled a bunch of horseshit (opening the marriage, talking about her 'freedom') about 10 years in. I talked her off the ledge at that point. The kids were really little. 8 years later and she pulls the same shit, but leaves for good and asks for divorce. My point being - these are stupid deluded people. When they told you who they are: listen. The idea that they would even entertain the notion of breaking their vows and breaking up their family for dick and to shirk responsibility (and tha…
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/24 02:47 PM
1

Less often than before. The last dream I had with her, she was trying to have sex with me and I realized there is no way in hell I would sleep with someone who fucks around as much as she does. So that's progress.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 03:43 PM
6

You facilitate the kids getting her gifts. You do not. I haven't had a conversation with my EX in about 2 years. All communication regards the kids and happens almost exclusively via email or text. She would prefer we were on better terms. I would prefer she not be a cum-for-brains slut. This is the compromise.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/24 03:20 AM
3

2) Still on antibiotics from her last STD (this is something that never gets talked about) She says she's on the pill. Ask what kind. Plus, that just means she raw dogs everyone. Jesus Christ 🤢
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/24 11:27 AM
5

When you experience harm and trauma from a “loving” partner, your life changes and you see the world differently. God damn can I get this on a bumper sticker?
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/24 03:35 AM
1

How long did you wait to start dating after your divorce, if I may ask.
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/24 03:34 AM
19

Why have them if you aren't committed to a family unit? Why destroy that to only remove the protection of said unit? Well if your ex is anything like mine, she didn't really want kids until the baby rabies set in. She's an idiot, so she's a slave to her impulses. She's doing the same thing now, only slightly different. I think her rapacious sex life is probably rooted in perimenopause and her bipolar disorder. This will pass at some point and she'll be into some other dumb thing. Again, she's a …
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/24 02:19 PM
1

The high is worth it I guess. Loneliness makes people do crazy things.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 12:42 AM
2

Dragging out a divorce is so stupid. It accomplishes nothing other than wasting money. It's like drinking poison and hoping it kills the other person.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 04:45 PM
2

I didn't initiate or want it, but once the die was cast I did almost all the work to get it done as quickly and cheaply as possible.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 05:31 PM
1

Marriage is like a terrible strip club. You have to pay to get in, and once you're fully disgusted and ready to go, you have to cough up all your money to get out. Nightmare fuel.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 01:56 AM
1

Cleaning out the basement after the EW left was a real eye opener. A mentally well person does not accumulate crap like that.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 01:54 AM
5

Not even remotely. I would have thought I had a higher likelihood of getting hit by lightning or s meteor.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 10:29 PM
2

The end of my marriage included a nightmarish foray into mon-monogamy. The ex is a sexaholic or something, she's a swinger with a body count that would have to be tabulated by NASA. Anyway, as a result of all that horseshit, plus the depression and stress of the divorce, I had no sex drive at all for about a year. I started wondering if I was asexual too. It has come back to some extent, but nothing that drives any decision making. And I have my teen daughters almost all of the time, which makes…
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/24 10:31 PM
3

it seems to describe every single one of us except those still in denial That's so well said ha ha
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/24 03:07 PM
2

Absolutely not. I wish I could forget all of it.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/24 05:43 AM
2

Jesus. If this subreddit was a morning call-in show giving away prizes for the worst story of the day, you'd will the tickets to Foghat.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 08:57 PM
9

Honestly, no red flags that I could have recognized as such at that point in time. We got together really young and she hadn't fallen apart yet. She was the most competent person I had ever met. Hell, that person might still be the most competent person I have ever met. She is no longer that person.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 08:45 PM
2

Is relationshit a word for real? Cause if it's not it needs to be holy moly.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 08:42 PM
2

Ha ha - it's almost a cliche at this point. Did yours have affairs or try the whole open marriage thing?
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 08:35 PM
11

I don't miss her having bedroom eyes for every man in the zip code. It was embarrassing. I don't miss her coming back from fucking other people and making that the center of her life, and therefore my life. Living with a whore is gross and boring and unsafe.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 01:48 PM
7

Same here bro. I set up an amp in the basement again. I can't quite play out loud again yet, but I'm getting there. And for the record, my EW was wrong about that part in Norwegian Wood! And if she's such a hotshot, feel free to play guitar for 20 years and show me how it goes. Moron.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 01:46 PM
14

The woman I married was good enough to marry. The woman I divorced was bad enough to divorce. Man that late 20s onset of mental illness is a bear.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 01:43 PM
7

Man that's no joke. Leading up to our wedding I had horrible stomach cramps. I had to take antispasmodics because I was doubled over with pain. Should have listened to my gut!
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 02:51 AM
21

I learned how profoundly mentally ill my EW is. I was a very stabilizing influence on her life. Without me to reign her in, she makes some really extraordinarily bad choices. Without her around I'm making better choices and taking better care of myself. No amount of therapy or meds or exorcisms will fix her. It's terminal. I learned how willing she was to take advantage of me. She finally dealt with her rat's nest of finances once she was on her own. Prior to that she was perfectly happy to let …
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 02:48 AM
0

I kicked my EW out and put her shit on the back porch for her to pick up. As I went through all the things, I just put anything of hers/ours on the same pile, or dropped it off at her apartment. IDGAF what happens with that junk. It's all just a monument to her failure and betrayal. If I could burn down the house I would, but it would prevent some logistical challenges.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/24 03:54 PM
3

How the actual hell are you guys getting any traction with women? I'm coming up on two years since the divorce was finalized. Apps are pointless. I get zillions of likes but no interaction. It's not super helpful that I have teen daughters and effectively 75% custody, was married for 18 years and never dated around before getting married young. IDK I'm lost.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/24 04:22 AM
7

Biggest red flag in a woman is being interested in me. If they're interested in me they probably have a fairly accurate assessment of their own social value (low), and accurate assessment of mine (very low).
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 08:13 PM
5

And it only gets worse over time.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 04:06 PM
2

Absolute slob when they lived alone, id clean her apartment more than she did. This is basically #1 for me. If someone can't just clean up after themselves as a fucking adult we aren't going to work out.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 04:05 PM
6

lol same!
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 03:37 PM
7

Say it louder for the people in the back! This is how you do it.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/24 03:36 PM
19

Mine is living an unspeakably gross sex life as a pansexual poly swinger, or something. It's revolting. I think she may be doing sex work. For some reason, it's really disturbing that someone I loved so much could just completely lose their mind like that. I rarely talk to her, and when I do it's just bizarre. Who IS this person? The voice is familiar, but it's not who I used to know. Or is it? Did something radically change, or was she always like this? You can drive yourself nuts asking yourse…
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 02:03 AM
10

I regret meeting my ex wife. I regret marrying my ex wife. I regret that my ex wife's parents met and made this awful person. I regret that the Angles met the Saxons and paved the path for this horrible 'human.' I regret that at some point a fish wriggled out of the ooze and humanity happened, because this waste of carbon, called my ex-wife, would eventually exist. I send the dizzy bitch a happy birthday and Mother's (oh that's rich considering what a shitty mom she is) Day form text because it'…
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 09:38 PM
13

Alligator tears. Fuck the hoe. She's butthurt because you aren't pining for her like a schmuck - at best. There is no way in hell this wasn't a performance, and by acknowledging it, you fell for her bullshit. Jesus Christ having someone that manipulative and stupid outta your life is a colossal win. Stop talking to her about your other partners. It's none of her fucking business.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 06:01 PM
14

I want a girl with a huge ass A man of culture and refinement.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 08:10 PM
13

She told me she 'wasnt happy' because the open marriage wasn't working out (ie it was killing me and making me completely miserable). I kicked her out and started loading her shit on the back porch. Changed the locks and initiated the divorce process because that dizzy twit was too stupid and lazy to actually do it properly. We're poor, so there aren't any assets to argue over and I just knew she would waste money somehow like she always did. So she initiated, I did all the hard stuff like usual…
/r/Divorce_Men06/07/24 10:16 PM
3

The hurry up and wait bullshit and nonsense gets very frustrating. Lawyers are nowhere near as organized or professional as I was expecting. Maybe if you have some really expensive law firm or something, I don't know.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 03:03 PM
3

Oh hon, there's more where that came from.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 02:34 PM
7

Do. Not. Communicate. With. Monsters. I'm shocked how someone claims that they care about you one moment and then the next moment doesn't. Never call or check if you're okay. It's shocking because you're probably a pretty normal good person and she's a piece of shit. That's it. That's all you'll ever figure out and all you need to know. What you're looking for her to say is 'you didn't do anything wrong, I'm just broken beyond reason and I'm tired of trying to be good.' But it's unlikely she wil…
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/24 11:45 AM
1

It's a long story, but we had a traditional marriage until she decided she wanted other relationships. I tried to hang with it because I loved her. She left when it was clear it was killing me. Now she's in the swinger/ poly scene and EXTREMELY sexually active. She really likes having sex with randos. I feel bad for her because it's hard to see how this doesn't end badly, but I feel worse for me and the kids because the whole thing is pretty goddamned dumb. She's bipolar and has a long history o…
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/24 11:24 AM
9

What do you like most about being divorced Not having money problems from dumb overspending and avoidable things. I'm still poor, but everything is accounted for, and I can go several days every week without spending a dime. Not having to be at home while she's out on dates, or generally figuring out ways to have sex with strangers. Wondering if she's telling the truth about anything. Not having to pretend to be ok with polyamory when I hate it. Not having to pretend she loves me when says so, b…
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 05:19 PM
7

Like somebody else said - this is the same logic employed by our delusional idiot ex-wives: but at least they have pussy privelege working for them. Their bill won't come due until they lose their looks. OP will be jumping directly into the meat grinder of human misery.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 12:50 AM
14

As a man at your age, no matter how much of a catch you think you are - you aren't. Best case scenario - you're fit, cool, good looking and extraordinarily wealthy. If you get divorced you'll be half as wealthy, and every fit, cool, good looking guy younger you is all those things and younger than you. If you think dating as a 50M divorced man will be anything other than an unmitigated cluster fuck, I want some of what you're smoking because it must be amazing. Go look at the the dating over 50 …
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 12:11 AM
17

Yeah man I feel this. I spent 18 years fretting over my every flaw and failing, while being an objectively good husband, dad, friend, sexual partner. Meanwhile she's an objectively terrible housemate, partner, friend, and mother. Why was my lack of perfection an indictment, but her lack of functionality acceptable? Never again.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 10:40 PM
20

will the tables ever turn ? Eh, I doubt it. The universe is at best indifferent. We do not live in a just world. If anything terrible people tend to get what they want. In a zero-sum game there is no incentive to play fair. The reason not to be awful is because we have to live with ourselves.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 03:10 AM
1

If you came looking for permission to cheat you entered the wrong shop brother. Either nut up and fix things with your wife or divorce the poor woman. And before you do the latter, so have a scan of the online dating subreddits. It's a nightmare out here.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 12:45 AM
14

Is this normal behavior for recently separated women? My brother that is exceedingly normal. Women these days have a capacity for promiscuousness that is truly revolting. Once they go down that road they're damaged goods.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 12:28 PM
1

I agree. I'm still sad about it all. I loved her very much, and it does sting to have been dumped not for someone, but for anyone. Nonetheless, I'm so glad not to be part of that dumb weirdo lifestyle. It's just so gross.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 11:52 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter