TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

IceCreamnCakenCake Archive

View 3 posts and 72 comments by IceCreamnCakenCake on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
18

Pls change the locks after he’s gone. I’m genuinely concerned for you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 01:15 PM
32

Literally the whole point. I love that for you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 12:15 PM
2

My pop pop was similar. I'm so sorry for your loss.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 04:48 PM
5

Jesus. I didn’t want to believe it being true so I looked it up: completely factual. Smh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 03:26 AM
3

Anytime I'm tempted to look, I notice and realize there's a reason.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 03:51 AM
2

This is clearly not love. This man is not pretending to be in love with her, and he never was pretending to be in love with her. He was using her and was very, very upfront about it. How much more up front could he have been? At that point, idk what to say. Perhaps ppl see themselves in her. TBH I don't. Obviously dude is a complete asshole. Noticing that he didn't *ever* hide that from her is not the same as blaming her imo. I wrote this to a different comment but it's relevant here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 03:49 AM
3

I would respond to the person who said the original statement. Focusing on the men here doesn't change the rest of the sentiments. On this sub you'll see PickMe girls lambasted just as much as shitty men. I know many, many women avoid any accountability for what we choose to entertain. I came to this sub bc I used to be one of them, and then have been curing myself ever since. That doesn't make assholes any less of assholes, although plenty conflate the two.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 03:43 AM
2

I'm baffled at the amount of ppl claiming this poor woman is a victim of "love". I also don't think it's victim blaming to notice what the friend did. This is clearly not love. This man is not pretending to be in love with her, and he never was pretending to be in love with her. He was using her and was very, very upfront about it. How much more up front could he have been? At that point, idk what to say. Perhaps ppl see themselves in her. TBH I don't. Obviously dude is a complete asshole. Notic…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 10:34 PM
5

I don't think allowing oneself to be walked all over is the same thing as having faith in humanity. This poor woman literally walked in on her boyfriend with other women on multiple occasions. I'd argue the point of being here, on this sub, is to acknowledge that when ppl treat you poorly, leave them. I personally find that message quite empowering.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 08:30 PM
3

I agree with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 07:14 PM
2

Of course. I think it's both. I think a person is horrible if they treat others horribly. I also believe ppl when they show me they're willing to treat me poorly. I also will paraphrase the commenter below: "this whole thread has some pickme energy. I don't understand what is being argued even. Hurtbae is being a Pickmeus Maximus. She's not making sacrifices for love. She's being a willing punching bag for a guy who wants to come home to her and hang out and likely go 50/50 or 100/0 and still ou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 07:13 PM
3

I did. He agreed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 07:12 PM
10

I've also had folks abuse my kindness, but I also see through this man's blatant lies. **Edited** He didn't even lie- he told her to leave him on multiple occasions after she kept walking in on him sleeping with other people. While I feel pity for PickMe girls, the point of this sub is the antithesis of what she chose to do, repeatedly. I came here bc I expect to be treated a certain way in relationships, and leave when I'm not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 07:11 PM
25

I've been talking to my boyfriend & his friend about this topic. They (men) think we're ridiculous for believing something so obviously untrue. They both laughed in bemused bafflement when I said that women often sacrifice for love. Friend: "But that's obviously not love... like CLEARLY...so she's just choosing to be dumb, and it's hard to feel sorry for her at that point." BF: "I'll say it kind and gentle to you; those men are good at being dicks, but they're usually not good liars, so...I'll b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 02:56 PM
1

I agree; it’s a balance. I take about three days of talking and conversing to decide if you’re worthy of my time whatsoever. If they’re too eager, I’ve found it disappointing and after a week or two tops it’s far too long of talking without action.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/20 04:11 PM
30

Relationships subreddit is literally why I started seeking other things and found this subreddit. I couldn’t take the horror stories combined with terrible advice anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/20 04:08 PM
1

Please send it to me, if you have it? I'll DM!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 09:22 PM
1

Fair enough shrug, I'm still learning and growing. This is the first time we've done anything sexual in just over 60 days of dating so i'm not sure it fits that definition, but it might not be the ideal, and I'm glad I found this sub to help me figure that bit out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 05:57 PM
13

I love that the first comment is trained for her to do the legwork of telling him to get his act together. It should have been apparent to him that he needs therapy or self-help or something, there's no point in talking at that point; it's time to go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 04:31 PM
30

OMG my ex flashed before my very eyes. He was "addicted" to porn, and video games, although he never drank or did drugs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 07:36 PM
23

That's why I miss the feature that let you see what each person is liking. If that still exists, they've reconfigured it so that it's a place I'm not sure where to access it. I found it enlightening during dating to say the very, very least.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 07:23 PM
10

He was negging you. What an asshole.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 04:16 PM
2

Oh thank you! I didn't realize there was a difference!
/r/RedPillWomen23/06/15 04:53 PM
1

I'm sorry! I misunderstood; I agree wanting to receive acts of service and gifts/tokens of affection can easily turn into gold-digging witch territory....YIKES.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/15 04:28 AM
2

This is brilliant. I'm earmarking this technique for a single friend of mine who is struggling with her dude crush. :)
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/15 09:21 PM
2

I like to both receive and give touch/quality time/words of aff. He likes to give touch (sex), gifts, acts of service. He likes to receive words of affirmation, touch (sex), and acts of service (me doing dishes, cooking dinner, etc...) It's interesting to see the interplay of what one likes to give and what to receive. My SO and I are pretty well matched, but I wouldn't mind him being a bit more effusive than he is naturally and he'll prolly wouldn't mind me a bit more grabby/handsy with him. Th…
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/15 09:14 PM
2

While acts of service isn't my personal love lang, what about women who wash dishes, do laundry and pack their husband's lunch? Those are "acts of service", are they not? I cannot think of another category such little deeds to make our SOs life easier would be classified as, and I've had to work hard to get better at them (since it's not my natural way of showing love). Picking up their dry-cleaning, organizing their calendar, and many "assisting" style help that we women can provide can fit und…
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/15 08:58 PM
1

Oh my effing goodness!! I'm so stoked- thank you guys so much! does a little boogie
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/15 01:11 AM
2

Nope.i have never had to convince myself my man was a good man. The only times I tried to do that, speaking personally, was when he was decidedly not a "good man". I can only speak for myself- I have a masculine SO who love participating in bloodsports (boxing, MMA) and has not been the most sensitive- he has, in the past, made comments similar to the "2nd best" comment you mentioned. The difference though, is the moment I told him unemotionally that I didn't appreciate hearing those types of co…
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/15 12:53 AM
3

We try to make men much more complicated than they often are; I have made so many mistakes attributing emotions and intent onto boyfriends for absolutely no reason (the "hamster" is REAL unfortunately)... my SO gave similar advice to my younger friend who was mystified by her dates' "mixed signals"-- if you are unclear about where you are on a man's priority list, it is because he has not made it a priority to be clear. in short; if you are receiving "mixed/meh signals", then, most likely he's n…
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/15 11:54 PM
1

Also this is a sign of depression as well. Losing a grandparent and a job is no joke. I believe there is a book called "The Midday Demon" about mental illness treatment and symptoms. I found it really helpful a few years ago when my SO's father died.
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 09:24 PM
5

GOOD FOR YOU!! It's not always easy, but it's ALWAYS worth it!
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 09:17 PM
2

Thank you for this. Lol I guess i could look at it like when we go to WF and he throws the Mac and Cheese in the cart... these girls were a cheat meal/comfort food. Both of us allow each other these moments bc 9/10 times we focus on our health and nutritional nourishment (I have a large weakness for carrot/red velvet cake so it's not just him :/) and we both make damn sure that we put the work in to be physically appealing to one another. While I might "tire" of doing a chore, this one is non ne…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 09:11 PM
2

Thank for taking the time and being so insightful! Your mentioning of prostitutes actually made me laugh- it would be so far beyond the pale for me that I couldn't ever consider it in a partner. The disgust I feel even thinking of it is palpable. Yikes! Old religious upbringings die HARD. You're completely right about the "low quality women" thing. If they weren't so obviously trashy I think I could handle it- I mean he could get most anyone he wanted; he chose these people. If it had been a ton…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 08:51 PM
1

LOL your grandma is right! We ARE disappointed a lot. I don't recommend it.... I think you're right about the communication bit- I have mentioned my needs in passing, but not in a way that conveys how important they are for me. I guess I just don't want him to feel guilty- I was raised that men (once you're in a committed relationship) have the right to sex when and how they'd like it. Basically that a woman getting her needs met through sex is more of a "cherry on top" scenario than an expectat…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 08:19 PM
3

I realized thanks to a commenter below, that most of the judgement stems from my religious upbringing. I had it drilled into me that our bodies are temples- what we eat and drink and allow/do can "desecrate" us. I also was raised that pleasures of the flesh are "wants" not "needs" and that simply giving into to those desires bc it's easy and pleasurable (male or female) is base. I'm not religious anymore, but those lessons really must have stuck, bc I have similar reactions to seeing friends dri…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 07:47 PM
2

Thank you so much for this! I have mentioned in passing that I'd like for our sex to be a bit "more romantic" but I haven't looked to see if there's more I could be doing outside the bedroom or made it clear how big of a deal it is to me. I think he'd be ok with meeting in the middle- we have sex at least twice a day and maybe one of the times can be more of a slow, loving exploration of bodies rather than a pull my hair sex fest. I'm glad I'm not the only one who has had thoughts like this befo…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 07:26 PM
1

Right, I have trouble respecting his lack of high sexual standards, and it's been pretty corrosive. That's why I'm here-- to talk to folks that might know better so that I can understand and stop being so judgemental.
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 05:45 PM
4

Sigh. I know. You're right; I struggle with being super judgmental- I'm a perfectionist and apply those rigid rules to myself along with everyone else. While I don't always say anything out loud, you can bet I'm looking down my nose with "moral" stuff especially. I'm decent at admitting where I have flaws, and not being a hypocrite, but being sanctimonious is still obnoxious. Being a harpy/judge is not in keeping with the type of person I want to be, so I'm putting it on the "work on" list.
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 07:49 AM
4

Thank you for your advice! And you honestly don't think that engaging with trashy folks displays poor judgement? He's so rational and holds himself to high standards elsewhere that it's hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that he seemingly had no issue with keeping such poor company. You're right; we go to the same places in his neighborhood pretty often and he's lived there a long time so it's a given we'll run into these people. LOL i have so many rediculous stories (like the time we r…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 07:37 AM
2

Tell her that white women make more than black and Latino men. That should shut them up. Honestly this argument makes me so angry.
/r/TheRedPill02/06/15 02:36 AM
1

I know I'm late but I LOVE BRET CONTRERAS. He completely changed my body.
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 02:18 AM
1

Good for you! Reading your post makes it clear how far I have to go! Too often recently I have been so lazy in regards to housework, but have less demanding responsibilities than my partner does. Thank you for being an inspiration; I really needed to see this post.
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 01:11 AM
–

puts hand in air and waves frantically I'm so exicited! I have THe SUrrended Wife and it's helped me so much!
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 01:06 AM
1

Pulled pork. Put pre seasoned ribs in a slow cooker with any cheap beer. Six hours later, pull out the bones. You will look like a goddess. :)
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 01:03 AM
1

YES ON SERIAL. That is all. 😊
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 01:01 AM
3

It's hard; when I've spoken to my brothers they make it clear that appearing too eager for sex (no matter if you want it or not) devalues a woman. As long as that is true, some women will use no to mean yes.
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 12:52 AM
4

This comment really hit home with me. Something can be morally bereft without being criminal. That doesn't make the action"OK" or excusable. I think this lack of delineation is what confuses the issue. We need a term for sex that has been coerced or initiated in messed up ways without calling it rape. I have had sex that was MUCH rougher than I wanted before with an ex because I knew he would react angrily/ guilt trip/ insinuate I was a horrible girlfriend who didn't love him. I would let him do…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/15 12:40 AM
4

You're right about cognizance- intent does not ever equal impact. I honestly think that by working on ways to be a better SO, my relationship will reap untold benefits. Thanks to RPW, it already has! :) My lovey can already sense the difference, and I am really happy with what I've learned here. I really appreciate that RPW holds us to a standard around our rhetoric, no carte blanch blaming men for our problems, no whining about how men are "dogs"& what have you. I may be frustrated at my SO, bu…
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/15 07:41 PM
1

Are you from a Latin/Hispanic culture?! Me too! It's really funny exactly what gets branded as "feminism" here when other cultures (that are much more traditional) the same behavior is considered a given.
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/15 04:25 AM
4

And are lucky enough to have fond memories of loving parents.
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/15 04:06 AM
1

Have you heard of Lauren Bush Lauren (she married Ralph Lauren's son, or nephew or some such..) even thinking about it now just cracks me up!!
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/15 04:04 AM
1

My SO had an awesome step father (same story with me) and a horrible father. His last name is hard to both pronounce and spell. He announced that when we get married he wants to go with mine, which is more common and flows well with his. I wouldn't mind his, but I'm glad he's open to mine. I rather like my name and am close to my paternal family (other than dad, but we're rebuilding our relationship currently). I think I look at it a little bit differently, because as a Latina, we typically you …
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/15 04:00 AM
48

I try to gently point out unkind characteristics. I wish someone had to me before I ruined some decent relationships. Things like lightly saying (as if in surpised) "wow you really don't like your husband much, much, do you?" Often it sobers them up and they come back right away with things they appreciate. Honestly though, more often than not it makes me more cognizant of the things I've been guilty of in the past. Glass houses and stones....
/r/RedPillWomen13/05/15 04:53 AM
2

This one was SO hard to accept, but is too true. I'm chatty and LOVE having all sorts of stimulating conversations. I had to realize that no matter how much fun I had asking collegues/ friends about politics and discussing art/culture/philosophy what have you, basically every dude was participating with a hidden motive. It didn't always come out right away, and I was SO nieve that I simply presumed until unfortunate uncomfortable situations arose. Thankfully I have some amazing older brother typ…
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/15 05:47 PM
3

That's the thing! If it were feminists; or blue pill people, I'd get it- but often I hear similar things coming from red pill identified or more traditional men! We as mates work hard trying to support our captains and, across the board im starting to see a pattern--whether it's my friend who stayed up with her alpha/traditonal bf through 3 yrs of law school to keep company/cook meals/write flash cards/help highlight, or the blue pill friend who helped test her fiancés beta version video game fo…
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/15 04:59 PM
2

http://www.forbes.com/sites/jefflanders/2011/11/01/study-shows-divorced-women-have-less-economic-security-than-women-who-stay-married/ I saved the quote a long time ago, and am having trouble finding it, but the above article from Forbes outlines some of these issues and the various research and studies behind them. It also points out the various outlier situations and the factors that come into play. In short; for most women, most of the time, divorce has a negative financial impact. Of the gen…
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/15 04:35 PM
9

There are plenty of SAHMs- simply because you don't personally know them doesn't mean they don't exist. Many military wives, for example. Our job as a first mate is to support our Captain. Sometimes this means being a listening ear for a sales pitch or a proof-reader for a speech. Sometimes this means (in my case, anyways), that I schmooze and do the soft-negotiation on my love's behalf. I have organized his files and at times have managed his calendar. Sometimes first mates go on supply runs, m…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 07:00 PM
3

I'm confused; this is one area where TRP doesn't correlate to the data I've seen on how different partners fare in divorce and marriage. My SO is very keen to have a family and be married someday, but wants to make sure he's on the right track personally, professionally, etc... Which of course I support. shrug My mother had me at 38 and my gma had her at 36 so I'm not trying to rush anything before we're ready and it makes sense. Honestly, I'm MUCH more frightened about being left high and dry t…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 06:45 PM
7

I work a 40 hour work week while going back to school and taking care of my mother (she has cancer). I mentor on the weekends. Are there times I'm stressed? Certainly! Are there times I'm tired? For sure! It's a question of "either both of us will be sad/miserable, one of us, or neither." At the very least, sex will take you as a couple up a notch for the moment--at least one person is satisfied. Many times I've been surprised to find that I've gotten some much needed stress relief myself! Thing…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 12:19 AM
3

I LOVE THIS. I read it a loooong time ago but you've inspired me to try reading it again! I realized simply through re-reading your bit about "how he shows love", is EXACTLY what I've been missing-- he texts and calls sometimes during the workday--he's even has said once he wouldn't mind hearing from me when we're both busy. I need to text him more.... THANK you fro making this so clear--I knew it but I didn't know..
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 12:05 AM
2

Thank you for the advice/encouragement! Sex typically is such a loaded subject in our society that I don't want to make it seem like a HUGE DEAL or get overly emotional...I love it when he's dominant and, at the same time, it would be nice to incorporate some gentleness/affection from time to time as well. These pages have helped me learn effective ways to become a better mate, and a better person and hopefully I keep up my end so that our relationship is solid, sustained, fun and frisky!
/r/askTRP28/04/15 11:01 PM
1

Lol all of that "dominant in the bedroom/keep emotionally anchored/speak without desire to please or pacify men or women/ constantly bettering ones looks, athleticism, knowledge and sense of self for one's own sake/head for finance/natural leadership" stuff that half of these dudes came here to learn he already had without the chat room. He teaches me new things about history and politics every day. He is my anchor, my protector and my rock. He makes it clear that he's proud to have me on his ar…
/r/askTRP28/04/15 03:27 AM
1

I can't speak for this man's gf, but the only analogy I can come up with is I think of sex as a dance between two people (at it's best), where my love thinks of sex--sometimes-- as like eating. LOL. No one cares about if the beef WANTS to be on a sandwich, it just has to be on your plate for you to enjoy yourself. But at the same time, many men in relationships do (I think?) want their gfs to at least like the experience... Just speaking for my SO, I KNOW he wants an active participant. Whenever…
/r/askTRP27/04/15 09:19 PM
1

I struggle with perfectionism, though, so that may be a part of things. Sometimes I take the advice on here and TRP past the point of it being healthy for me (I didn't realize until VERY recently, I was allowed to offer other suggestions or say "later, babes" when the SO wanted to be intimate past the point of physical comfort)....I just sucked it up and pretended not to be miserable/in pain, which isn't the best for maintaining a great partnership, either... Eventually he noticed and was very c…
/r/RedPillWomen27/04/15 04:05 PM
5

I struggle with this all the time! I basically lurk around here hoping to figure out what I need to be doing differently. Thank you for posting this! :) I'll look to others to offer the advice but I wanted to say that I know EXACTLY how you feel and you're not alone!
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/15 11:33 AM
2

I will- I know there's many things I need to work on! Thanks for the encouragement!
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/15 02:45 AM
1

LOL In short I just think I need some tips on being forgiving and more positive so that I don't begin the cycle and make things hard for myself-he needs a lot of compassion and has had a hard upbringing and in the past I have been a nag about his drinking so I know I'm no saint. I also tend to be super forgetful (which drives him crazy) and am on the messy side (he's quite neat and orderly; his dad was a military man). I'm working on my education and have really been working on the nagging side,…
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/15 01:08 AM
1

I will when I'm brave enough! Thanks for the invitation....Right now I'm trying to figure out if my SO is actually an alpha--the more I read on TRP the more confused I get. He's stubborn, protective, and makes almost all the decisions about dinner, our sex life, etc... (LOL I wouldn't even try to put input in this) But he's also pretty prone to anger. I know that the things I do most likely have a lot to do with him lashing out; so maybe it's just a reaction to me (so if I do my part he'll be a …
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/15 09:50 PM
2

Hi there! Was lurking b/c I connected with some of the content, but not really the tone of the main page. My SO is a def. alpha, and while some of that was easy/desirable, other parts have hard for me to adjust. Some of the advice here really seemed to fit our situation on how to make my relationship better. Now I'm just trying to focus on the resentment I sometimes feel so that I can be more positive and have a whole and happy heart for my SO. I often feel as though I'm failing at being the "ri…
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/15 11:39 PM
1

We've been together almost 2 years, and I want to make this work.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/15 09:00 PM
–

I guess I'm a bit confused because I pretty much do feel this way. I haven't said anything to my SO simply because I don't think it would change anything, and because I don't want to be thought of as trying to manipulate or test him--I'm not. Also, he doesn't really take any unsolicited suggestion/opinion of mine seriously (which I guess is a good thing), so there would be no point. I just wish that he actually liked touching me without the end goal of my vagina always in mind. Foreplay is what …
/r/askTRP
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter