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ImPissedOffALot Archive

View 1 posts and 100 comments by ImPissedOffALot on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
6

911ImPissedOffALot/r/askMRP08/06/21 10:50 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Deadlift her into the car Drive said car to the gym Deadlift her into the gym Do your regular training session
/r/MarriedRedPill01/11/22 02:57 PM
3

What /u/tempered_man said : if your plan is sound (in your opinion) and you can take it to completion, and if it's your money that she wants to use in hiring an expert, her opinion is not really relevant. I can understand, though, that you don't want to have that ringing noise in your ears about how you don't know what you're doing, and her fighting you is annoying as hell. She probably fights you because in the past you have not shown that you were not competent, so she follows her pattern. How…
/r/askMRP20/09/22 12:39 PM
2

Take this with the suspicion you should have from any random retard answering your question. One of the ressources that have helped me the most with kids are Dr Becky Kennedy’s strategies for handling kids (I think it’s useful for kids aged 18 months and more). Incidentally everything she says is very useful to fix my nice guy attitude towards my wife using some very simple principles : she is responsible for her feelings and I’m responsible for the boundaries ; take a step back and do a reality…
/r/askMRP10/08/22 04:33 PM
1

I’ve read most of this and that is something that I deeply regret. What are you even trying to achieve ?
/r/askMRP03/07/22 05:21 PM
1

I also told her that I must not have made myself clear the night before about planning to take an ATV ride (again, there was no misunderstanding). I don't understand, how is that an appropriate reaction, or demonstration of anger ? Was the whole goal to make her feel guilty ? Either you consider that you made yourself clear, and you do not tell her the opposite after she shat on your expectations, or you consider that you did not make yourself clear, and that's on you.
/r/askMRP01/06/22 11:39 AM
4

This is a pinned post for a reason.
/r/askMRP10/04/22 09:29 AM
9

I'm using machines to prevent incorrect execution. It's a premium gym with a great staff. I will slowly switch to free weights in a few months, I want to build a solid base first. I'm not overselling this when I say that lifting free weights will change your life. There is zero point in switching slowly, just grab a barbell and start squatting. Watch the videos from the SL5x5 program to get started. When you realise you can lift twice your weight after a few months' training, you get a confidenc…
/r/askMRP23/03/22 12:03 PM
5

She was the first woman that didn't dump me after a few months. Do not let that define you. You have a plan to get better on yourself, and late 30s means that you have 40ish years ahead of you of relationships. You're basically reaching your prime value, if you put in the work. As next reads i recommend Pook and Poon. Are you lifting ? You mention the gym, but make sure that you don't fuck around there. Make the best of your time. ​ I think my case is different because the most of you where in t…
/r/askMRP23/03/22 10:28 AM
5

Ok, not going to be judgemental because I suck as much as you do. Just based on that. Read your post assuming I wrote it and realize how bad it is. Now imagine one the vets facing that situation and you have the advice you need there. I beat myself up at night because my reactions suck. But reflecting on them allows me to be a little bit more prepared for the next time.
/r/askMRP19/03/22 10:09 PM
8

Am I being a dick by refusing to come to bed early and then getting up at 10.30 to do my tasks? This isn’t /r/AmITheAsshole where you seek our validation. If you value initiating sex with her more than what you plan on doing at 9 PM, just do it. Otherwise don’t do it.
/r/askMRP09/03/22 06:28 PM
1

How would you have reacted if you did not have your wife and kid with you ? My advice : always keep a bag full of your feces in your car, next time this happens, throw it at the offender.
/r/askMRP07/03/22 11:00 PM
2

Thanks for your feedback. I think you're right : looking for outcomes is only going to discourage me, it's just another covert contract. I'm looking for meaning though. I lift because it makes me stronger. I shut up because I finally understood that discussing what upsets me is not going to fix it. I think all in all, I have thousands of micro-changes to do, and figuring out each of them is going to happen because at some point it will click. Could you detail a bit more what you mean about PON ?…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/22 12:03 AM
3

OYS #21 38 yo, 176cm, 72kg, 17% BF (BIA) / 14% (Strongur) in a LTR for 8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Last OYS was Jan 4th. It sucked and got me banned. I’ve been at this for 9 months now, and got banned 4 times. From that I had to take a clue : what I was doing was not effective, and was a waste of my time, or at least, a very, very inefficient use of it. So I got back to the basics, read back again to figure out why I was not doing anything useful. My bottom line is : it’s all about me and my …
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/22 10:28 PM
4

Whatever you do for Valentine’s Day, do it because you want to do it, not because of her attitude. You want to go at a restaurant ? Go. Tell her if you want her to join, but go for you anyway. You want to give her a card ? Help yourself. Just don’t write something you think she expects.
/r/askMRP11/02/22 06:26 PM
1

Do you know why you are with her ? You’ve threatened to leave her multiple times. Now you don’t trust her, and you know you can get someone else if you have to. So either you stay with her, or you don’t. In any case you need to be clear on the reasons you have, and the goals you want to achieve by this decision.
/r/askMRP01/02/22 09:11 AM
1

Generally speaking I’m wondering if your wife’s shape is troubling you because it reflects badly on you - external validation - or for some other reason. Then again I converted your wife’s weight from freedom units into kilograms and holy shit how could you let her get that fat without saying anything about it ? She knows she’s fat, she probably feels bad about it and she wants to get thinner. All you have to do is remove the stupid snacks from your home and have a discussion about home-made mea…
/r/askMRP15/01/22 06:37 PM
2

OYS #20 38 yo, 176cm, 72kg, 16% BF (BIA) / 13% (Strongur) in a LTR for 8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Mission : get stronger, physically, mentally, emotionnally. Last OYS was posted 3 weeks back. I haven’t posted because I did not sense any progress done by then. In fact the end of year occurred exactly as I expected it to be : stressful, prone to arguments, and only barely enjoyable. Focusing on the « now » rather than on my MAP was my tactical choice, and retrospectively it was the right one. …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/01/22 10:21 PM
32

I’m gonna assume you tried something new, and it backfired terribly. That’s better than doing the same old shit you did previously. Your wife proposed to go for something intimate and you turned that into a transactional sexual relation. Of course it went wrong. What did you do then ? You defended. You excused. You explained. You rationalized. There was no frame to hold then.
/r/askMRP24/12/21 08:38 AM
4

Start by identifying all those needy behaviors. When you go out do you ask for permission to do so ? Or do you just state what you want to do and do it ? When you expect her to be thankful for whatever you’ve done, what is the reason ? One thing that helped me is to realize that my wife will nag and whine. If I do what I want or not. So be your own judge. Stop asking for her validation on what you do, you will not get it, and she resents you for it.
/r/askMRP18/12/21 05:11 PM
1

I'm sure you're right. But could you tell me what's the tell from this OYS ?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/12/21 09:02 AM
1

OYS #19 38 yo, 176cm, 72kg, 16% BF (BIA) / 14% (Strongur) in a LTR for 8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Mission : get stronger, physically, mentally, emotionally. Presently working on my discipline to make progress. I’ve let myself go previously, doing my OYS late and without significant content. I did that on purpose because I had no progress to account for, and because I was feeling overwhelmed by life in general. This fit well with my tendency to procrastinate, called out by /u/RenascenceMan 60…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 11:10 PM
2

Your comment is spot on. I appreciate you taking the time to read and provide feedback. > I get that your wife sucks To be frank I don't think she's that bad. I have internalised that she behaves poorly because I let her. > Does your wife work? She does ... associative work. Which is to say, in my perspective, all the work she does is less important than what I do. > Does she do anything to help with the kids consistently? Yes. She's great on logistics. She can plan in advance for all their time…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 10:33 AM
1

What's stopping you ?
/r/askMRP13/12/21 10:21 PM
1

Happy to have a second opinion on my schedule. Typical day with workout is as follows. - Wake up at 7. Until 9:15 I'm having breakfast, dressing the kids, take them to school and preschool. - Then I follow with my workout. Normal lifting session is around 50 minutes. Plus time to get back home and showering : this brings me to 10:30 - I take a 45 minutes lunch break. Work until 5:15 PM. - From 5:15 to 8 PM, I get the kids back from school and preschool, feed them, shower them and put them to bed…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/21 02:36 PM
1

OYS #18 38 yo, 176cm, 72kg, 16% BF (BIA) / 14% (Strongur) in a LTR for 8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Mission : get stronger, physically, mentally, emotionally. 60 DoD ’21 booster Week 3: hygiene. I’m behind on trimming my nails and shaving. Updating my schedule to trim at most every two weeks, shaving every other day. Having to explicitly set this helps getting into the habit of it. I’ve also added to my routine a monthly grooming of my balls using hair removing cream. Present lifts : BP 77.5x6…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/21 02:29 PM
2

OYS #17 37 yo, 176cm, 72kg, 16% BF (BIA) / 14% (Strongur) in a LTR for 8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Mission : get stronger, physically, mentally, emotionally. Starting with the 60 DoD ’21 booster Week 1: lifting. Still adjusting the A/B sessions I set. The switch I made from my previous training doubles the weekly volume to lift, which was a mistake. I have to alternate between strength and hypertrophy there, so Monday and Tuesdays will be for hypertrophy at 70% of 1RM, and Thursday and Friday…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/12/21 10:51 PM
1

Interesting, thanks. Looks similar to what I've informally developed, but adding the structure will help a lot.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/11/21 10:49 AM
1

I have had a week now of disciplining obnoxious behavior with the kids using counting. The method calls for you to be firm but not angry, and give the child 2 opportunities to calm down. Can you tell me more about this method ? What do you actually do ?
/r/MarriedRedPill29/11/21 01:16 PM
1

Present lifts : BP 72.5x6, DL 120x6, SQ 87.5x6, OHP 47.5x6 I have started with SL 5x5. Then I switched after a few months to BLS's plan (a classic PPL with only one compound lift per workout). I readjust now again.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 01:00 PM
1

Point of vocabulary : I'm not a daddy to her, I don't want to be a daddy to her. I'm a daddy to my kids. You're right, everything she does reflects my drunken captainship. Her behaviour is unacceptable because I let her behave this way. That does not come from nothing : somehow I enjoyed having her be the bad guy at home, and having her as a shrieking reminder that there is shit to do at home. No more. Now, if she gets mad about something, it's either because 1. I messed up and I had to do somet…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 12:59 PM
1

Congrats on the weight loss. That's quite impressive. I've checked your last OYS. We are basically the same age, same height. Our lifts are about the same (you probably are more consistent than I am). I don't understand how you lost 7 pts of BF in 3 months. Are you sure your measurement is accurate ? Also it looks like you are at ~ 700 calories deficit, which is a lot. My guess is something is off in your numbers. Are you maybe doing some specific cardio ?
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 12:39 PM
3

OYS #16 37 yo, 176cm, 72kg, 17% BF (BIA) / 14% (Strongur) in a LTR for 8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Mission : get stronger, physically, mentally, emotionally. Another lockdown week Following up on my contact with infected covid+ case, I was unable to get tested last week - because I would not make myself go there. This means I’ve lost one week of lifting. That’s a big fail on me. 60 DoD’21 booster : I’ve modified my lifting plan to be as follows : • Lift 4 times a week • A day : Squat, Bench P…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 03:00 PM
1

I’ll heed your advice and see how it would make sense to incorporate squats at each workout. And please don’t misquote me like you did.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 07:08 PM
1

Thanks for this answer. My OYS is indeed a way for me to plan how to get better. I'm still unsure on how to fill in what I did, without going fishing for validation. I'll see how I can change that for next week (see what I did?).
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 02:00 PM
2

Yes, I'm not fond of squatting 3x per week, for two reasons : - when I started doing SL5x5, I noticed, when I stopped making easy weights increments, that I took longer to rest to make progress. Squatting every other day 5x5 led to bad form on Wednesday and Friday - my upper body (mostly, back and shoulders) need more focus than the default SL 5x5 program. Starting by a squatting session reduces my performances on the other lifts, and these need improving.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 01:56 PM
1

I'm not sure what your point is exactly. I know how I feel and I'm not happy with my present state. Is there something you want me to reflect on ?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 01:03 PM
2

OYS #15 37 yo, 176cm, 72kg, 17% BF (BIA) / 14% (Strongur) in a LTR for 8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Mission: Last week’s OYS was a demonstration on how lost I am. So going back to a simple mission, something I can get behind : get stronger. Physically stronger, mentally stronger, emotionally stronger. Physical I’ve been at a family lunch last week-end and we discovered my bil has covid. So I’m restraining myself from going out until I get some tests. However I don’t want that to be an excuse n…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 11:53 AM
1

I'm in. Looking forward to make life-changing decisions.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 08:37 AM
8

It’s fine to be mad. I’m mad too. Use that anger to do something useful. How about this ? If you try to placate her or if you don’t, you’ll likely get some shit from her. Why don’t you do what you want ?
/r/askMRP13/11/21 06:25 PM
4

Go buy some noise reducing headphones. When she starts being bitchy, put these on and start listening to very loud bagpipes. This way it will be obvious that you are pulling your attention without opening your mouth. Or find something better to do.
/r/askMRP13/11/21 05:36 PM
1

What is not okay is avoiding or delaying the ability and habit to ask yourself what you want very frequently (dozens of times a day). Failing to do this lets you fall into so many others' frames that you lose all sense of self. But doing it with frequency gives you a very familiar and deeply-felt sense of self. Thanks for your comment. I'll start getting that habit. It's really foreign to me, but just asking that question is a good start, and something I can do starting right now. ​ That you're …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/11/21 08:53 AM
2

OYS #14 37 yo, 176cm, 17% BF (BIA) / 14% (Strongur) in a LTR for *8 years, married for 6, 2 kids Back from 2-week ban for rule 9, again. That’s my 3rd ban. Breaking my usual OYS template for this one to be more authentic. It makes it harder to write, but maybe I can find something interesting in what I dump here. She doesn’t matter Having been banned twice for the rule 9, I’ve reviewed the OYS in question and asked if I would objectively ban myself. After review, I wouldn’t. So I’m now asking if…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/11/21 05:25 PM
9

This is the best answer I’ve read, as it is the closest to my experience. OP, why the fuck do you allow your wife’s mood dictate your home’s ? You claim you sleep in separate rooms because of snoring, what are you doing about that ? You’re not overweight, do you indulge too much alcohol, or do you have a medical condition that you should treat ? You already entered a major crisis with your wife months after getting married because you have a lousy sex life, why did you get married if you were no…
/r/askMRP07/11/21 04:37 PM
2

If your life is a book, you’re presently in a chapter where you argue over divorce and sleep in different rooms. If you want that to be over, you close that chapter.
/r/askMRP27/10/21 07:10 AM
1

OYS #13 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 72 kg, 16.2% BF (BIA) / 14.1% (Strongur), wife: SAHM 32, together 9 years, married 7 years, 2 kids (5 and 2) Reads :NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG (re-reading), RM, MAP, Poon, Pook, Sidebar, Archwinger on marriage, Bigger Leaner Stronger, Fuccfiles, SGM Currently reading WISNIFG and 48 laws of power Presently at my inlaws’, enduring a shitty time with my wife and kids. Physical Lifts unchanged: BPx5 70kg, DLx5 115kg, Sqx5 85kg. I planned my week off by going to the gym more…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 09:18 AM
5

In my coming OYS I made a similar mistake with reduced stakes : I let her chose if we were going to have a good time yesterday evening. Of course she chose the testy way to fuck us up. If you don’t want to divorce (right now), then don’t. Plan for it, cause the question will pop up again. But don’t leave her in the position of deciding for you. Also : I’d let her know and acknowledge that the chapter is closed so that the next time it reopens it becomes a new crisis. My retarded opinion.
/r/askMRP26/10/21 06:10 AM
7

Dude. Just : why does it matter ? You are reevaluating your present relationship based on something that had no consequences 3 years ago. Don't torture your mind and have fun like you should be doing anyway.
/r/askMRP21/10/21 08:58 AM
8

Well if you really want to know why : - you're 19, she's 21. - you don't mention liking her - this whole thing looks to be about your ego and about her - that was 6 months ago - I could not get past paragraph 3 - even the TLDR was boring
/r/askMRP21/10/21 08:50 AM
3

It's really hard to care about this.
/r/askMRP21/10/21 07:44 AM
1

Good call. I’m setting myself for failure when I write this shit. I’m better than that.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 04:45 PM
1

House is a fucking wreck. Just have to clean it. She's been useless and lazy. Need to address this but for now I'm going to take care of it. What do you mean, "for now I'm going to take care of it" ? I like the model "assume she's dead, what do you do for yourself ?" - your wife is not your maid, if you want it clean and it's not, you can clean it. Does that mean you had an agreement, and she's not doing her part (in which case), or is that a covert contract ?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 08:48 AM
2

Could have spent the time reading, or better yet working on my thesis. Why didn't you ?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 08:32 AM
2

> No mind games. Keep it simple. That's my problem in a nutshell. I'm uncovering a shitloads of covert contract : - "If I go to the gym and get ripped she'll want to sleep with me" - "If I post weekly on the OYS thread I'll get better and she'll want to sleep with me" - "If I go to bed early and initiate she'll want to sleep with me" - "If I get distant, stop initiating and own it, she'll want to sleep with me" Yeah, basically I'm frustrated and angry that these don't work. Even though I my rati…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/21 01:17 PM
1

OYS #12 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 72 kg, 16.2% BF (BIA) / 14.1% (Strongur), wife: SAHM 32, together 9 years, married 7 years, 2 kids (5 and 2) Reads : NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG (re-reading), RM, MAP, Poon, Pook, Sidebar, Archwinger on marriage, Bigger Leaner Stronger, Fuccfiles Currently reading WISNIFG and 48 laws of power Physical The plan is to keep lifting on BLS first year plan. Present lifts : BPx5 70kg, DLx5 115kg, Sqx5 85kg. Progress is very slow there, It’s now taking multiple weeks for me to …
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/21 10:08 AM
2

“I was late, and I’m not happy about it” is better than fake promises, if you are going to be late again. And chances are, you will.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/10/21 07:08 PM
2

You and /u/ProtoWorm are on sync here. Thanks for your answers, they helped me dig up some follow up. Ego protection and investment : Yes. Definitely my ego at play here. But that's not all that's involved. Some more here. I accept being denied sexual access to my wife. I definitely am butthurt about this ; however that's not off-limit. I do not accept her talking down to me because of my sexual desire. I've lived with that for too long, and then I decided I would draw the line there. Yes, I wan…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:08 PM
1

OYS #11 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 72 kg, 16.5% BF (BIA) / 15% (Strongur), wife: SAHM 32, together 8 years, married 6 years, 2 kids (5 and 2) Reads :NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG (re-reading), RM, MAP, Poon, Pook, Sidebar, Archwinger on marriage, Bigger Leaner Stronger, FuccfilesCurrently reading WISNIFG and 48 laws of power Lifts:Currently lifting 3x a week, on the BLS plan. BPx5 70kg, DLx5 115kg, Sqx5 85kgI keep lifting on schedule, and I walk outside a lot. This is great for recollecting my thoughts and …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 09:27 AM
17

It’s a shit test. Correct answer : “my parents are dead, a gangster shot them in front of me when I was ten.” If she pushes the living together thing, flip pressure and ask for a threesome with her roommate.
/r/askMRP09/10/21 06:04 AM
0

I'm probably around 15-20% bodyfat, I'll drop down to 10-12% over the next few months so physical appearance is not something that I can use as an excuse. 15-20% is a huge interval. You should be more precise about your BF% ; start by tracking it week by week with rigorous precision so that you know what can be achievable in months, that will give you a good roadmap to improve.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/10/21 07:58 PM
1

I'm seeing value in this space and I am more than willing to use it as much as I can. I'm here because what I tried before didn't work, and it actually made things worse. So, I'm trying to unfuck myself, and OMS with you enables me to remove all the self-lies I conveniently tell myself. And if I get banned again... well I'll find another way. I'd prefer not to, though.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/10/21 10:22 AM
1

OYS #10 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 72 kg, 16.5% BF (BIA) / 15% (Strongur), wife: SAHM 32, together 8 years, married 6 years, 2 kids (5 and 2) Reads : NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG (re-reading), RM, MAP, Poon, Pook, Sidebar, Archwinger on marriage, Bigger Leaner Stronger, Fuccfiles Currently reading WISNIFG and 48 laws of power Lifts: Currently lifting 3x a week, on the BLS plan. BPx5 70kg, DLx5 115kg, Sqx5 82.5 I was banned for a few months after messing up the way I handled the 60 DoD event, which was stup…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 03:57 PM
11

If you are here you probably know the rational answer to your question. Your priority should be to get more sex, that’s how you got here. Of course doubling down when your relation is shit is a BAD idea. I know that because I did exactly that, thinking that investing all my bucks in a new home would give us some space and would help us get to a better place. Stupid fuck. By the way 1200 sq ft for 2 toddlers is fine. I used to live in 750 sq ft for the same capacity. Going to a house with a front…
/r/askMRP18/09/21 01:33 PM
2

Apparently you can feel everyone’s feelings but your own. Can’t answer on your questions, but I’d say that’s where you need to be mindful : what do you want, how do you feel, what should you do so that you feel more comfort and so that you meet your needs. As to changing your kid when you get home, who cares ? If it’s asked in a disrespectful way you need to enforce boundaries. Otherwise if it’s asked nicely and it needs to be done, yeah just do it.
/r/askMRP08/08/21 06:47 AM
2

It looks like you're not sure what this place is about. I'm not either, so I"m just going to lay down my own idea, see if you relate. Discovering the married red pill 3 months ago, I finally understood that instead of looking at my couple and family through the "we have problems" lens (aka my wife's lens) I need to look at it with a "I have problems" mind. Sure, I'm not living a Disney wedding. Sure, we (<-- see that ? Is that mine ? no it's not.) have trouble keeping our shit together with the …
/r/askMRP02/08/21 12:05 PM
3

You got a lot of great input which I'm taking for myself as well. Here are my two cents, but keep in mind that I'm a mess, and I'm temporarily banned from /r/marriedredpill, so really take only what makes sense for you. I have two kids (4 and 2) ; my wife is in a state of chronic depression, and I'm starting on the MRP journey (3 months in). When we had our first child I gave up my hobbies and spent more time at home because I saw that she could not handle being alone with the kids. Things got b…
/r/askMRP09/07/21 11:28 AM
1

Understood. On the process: I get that asking the right question as I reflect upon my life and my choices helps me build a frame. What I'm not sure, is how to deconstruct a mental model in which I've been living for years. Are you saying that just thinking about it is enough to stop sabotaging myself ? The NMMNG exercises are interesting in that regard because they ask to forcibly do something and reflect on how it makes us feel. I'm doing this ; are you saying that I will, eventually, get some …
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/21 09:45 AM
1

You have a frame issue. I am aware of this, I've mentioned it in my recent OYS consistently. So far the only tools I see for building a frame is the motto "lift, stfu, sidebar" which I'm working on. I'm interested in any more specific tool the community can point me to, though.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/21 09:10 AM
1

> Is that your vision? The guy you want to be is completely dissociated by a wall from the emotions of his wife? That's not my vision. I want to have compassion and be empathetic. But today I don't know how to do that without being an emotional leech. Which literally sucks. I'm hoping to be able to build some better model.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/21 08:44 AM
1

My family is middle-eastern. I guess that’s close enough. Thanks for your answer.
/r/askMRP10/06/21 06:39 AM
1

It means two things. 1. Dissociating my emotions from my wife’s. Just because she’s angry or sad or scared does not mean I should be. In practice it’s about building a barrier between us. 2. Being able to use or express my emotions instead of being dominated by them. For example when I’m angry, I’m struck and it’s takes time for me to be able to use that anger physically or verbally.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/06/21 03:14 PM
1

Thanks for your answer. For more context my askMRP post is more detailed. It's not very interesting though, I bore myself reading it. Most of the comments there are on point : I have no frame, and I don't say what I want. I think that's because 1. I've never been able to know what I want, rather what I don't want and 2. I've given up getting what I want around my sisters. I've consistently made the mistake of trying to play their game to get a small win. Their game suck, I suck at it, and I don'…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/06/21 12:49 PM
1

OYS # 9 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 75 kg, 18% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, currently reading The Rational Male Stats : (SL 5x5) Squat 35 kg, BP 30 kg, Rowing 40 kg, SP 30 kg, DL 45kg Mission statement I want to get stronger. I want to have physical strength, I want to be the master of my emotions, I want to lead my life instead of my life leading me. Physical I’m doing ok, considering. My lifts are sti…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/06/21 09:09 AM
-3

Is this really how you think a man should act ? If I’ve learned anything, it’s that I should discard any comment that has this kind of statement. How should a man act ? I don’t know. Is that really your best angle to shame me ? From my post there hundreds of ways for you to do better.
/r/askMRP09/06/21 05:44 AM
1

Your point is very valid, but for a number of reasons it is not something that I can apply. I don't want to go into tedious details there, nobody cares. ​ But the bottom line is : in some cases I'm definitely making excuses and it's on me.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/06/21 09:26 AM
1

​ She has an amazing technique of "I'm not feeling well" / "I'm pissed at you" tuned up to 11. Basically when we had a plan set in advance, she just drops it in the morning, tells me she just won't do anything and stay in bed. ... and she just does that. I've called her bluff a few times, or confronted her, does not change a thing. So if I don't want my kids to be left alone in their room I take care of them. Of course, this fucks my whole day. And of course, before covid's flexible work arrange…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/06/21 09:21 AM
8

Here is a quick note on my progress over these 60 days. Disclaimer : I joined this sub about a week before the beginning of the 60 DoD, so I had a LOT of progress to make in 60 days. I've started exercising on a very regular basis. It has now become a habit of mine to workout, and if I have two days without training, I feel like I've been a slob. I have spent the best part of the last 17 years not doing any kind of sport at all. I've started using bodyweight exercise by watching youtube videos, …
/r/MarriedRedPill02/06/21 07:17 AM
2

OYS # 8 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 75 kg, 18% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, currently reading The Rational Male Mission statement I want to get stronger. I want to have physical strength, I want to be the master of my emotions, I want to lead my life instead of my life leading me. My tools for this : building on the habits I’m taking, and redefining the balance at home. I’m still completely in my wife’s…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/06/21 08:35 AM
3

Someone can probably fill in here. I remember reading in a post that having to defend your decisions is a terrible situation to be in, and you should instead bring her to the table and state your plan instead. Basically, like everything else, have a plan, and bring her onboard if she wants to be with you.
/r/askMRP28/05/21 09:02 AM
4

You don't have to explain your financial choices to me, I don't really care. I'm not the one that's insecure about your financial situation (you are) or that wants to spend the money instead of saving it (she is). IMO taking a loan to get married or go to a honeymoon is stupid, unless it's a well thought of plan (taking a loan for money you already have because interest rate is lower than investment rate for example). Since you're getting married young (and at church) am I right to assume you wa…
/r/askMRP28/05/21 08:39 AM
3

Appropriate honeymoon is what you would both enjoy. If it's a 5* hotel on a beach with cocktails and fucking 3x a day that you want, fuck yeah. If you enjoy being on the move, this would not be my choice, but you're 12 years younger than I am. More importantly, from your comments, it looks like you're doing what she said she wanted as a honeymoon, but that you have no idea what you actually want. Here the problem is not so much that the honeymoon is cheap, it's that even though it's cheap, she s…
/r/askMRP28/05/21 07:56 AM
1

My thought process, right now, is that I'm no longer trying to caretake for her. On paper, she should be handling the kids and the cooking during the day, while I'm working from home. She's not up to it. It's not new, ever since our eldest was born I figured out she would be unable to handle the kids at home, and I had to fill in. With covid lockdown, it's now worse because I don't have the excuse of going to the office. I'm at home, and she knows it, and she benefits from this. During a normal …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/21 12:12 PM
1

OYS # 7 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 75 kg, 18% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG, currently reading Book of Pook (in progress) and The Rational Male Goal and state of mind I’m building frame. Out of nothing because the last time I had a frame was 18 years ago. My goal is to get to know what I (really) want, and to set a course over there. My progress on this is absolutely lame, all of the goals that I can consider are thos…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/21 09:49 PM
1

OYS # 6 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 76 kg, 18% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo)Reads : NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG, Book of Pook (in progress) Back from being banned Back after a two week ban for a rule 9. No point in arguing there, I somehow knew I was getting it when I posted it. I still was deeply annoyed that random strangers on the internet did not validate my rant, and even more annoyed at myself for being affected by this. Then came this message whic…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/21 04:15 PM
-1

OYS #5 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 76 kg, 18% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : NMMNG (x2), MMSLP, WISNIFG (in progress) Previous goals: • SFTU -> met • Buy complements and measure up bodyweight workout schedule -> met • Cook more, Uber-eat less (measurably) -> met (4 deliveries this week) • Measure calories for a few select meals -> met Relationship Going into a bit of details here because there is no summing up this crappy week. After last week’s …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/21 08:46 AM
2

I definitely am. And the reasons I’m not too stressed out by this are : - I’m 4 pounds over my target - When I cook, I know for a fact I’m not exceeding my calorie intake, I just don’t know by how much - most of my excesses come from when I don’t cook - and I plan on reducing measurably the number of such meals - I’m basically fine with reaching my goal within 8 weeks instead of 4, if this mean getting more time and energy to devote on issues I’m struggling with, such as self-affirmation and cho…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/21 04:46 PM
2

OYS #4 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 77 kg, 18% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : NMMNG x2, MMSLP, Currently reading Book of Pook and WISNIFG Previous goals: • Find the courage to open myself to a safe person -> met. • Keep reading (WISNIFG) -> met • Keep up with DoD -> met • SFTU -> not met • Buy complements and measure up bodyweight workout schedule -> not met Relationship Starting by this because it’s the highlight of the week. Week started of grea…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/21 11:31 AM
1

Thanks for the feedback. I'm not deeply convinced that it's worth spending the time weighing my food, but I wasn't convinced getting in better shape would be beneficial either, so I'll spend more attention on this.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/21 08:40 PM
2

I know she does not. I've engaged her on her lack of respect in the past, but I'm not about to do that now. In the near future, I plan on not letting her remarks on sex go unnoticed, but I will not argue again. As for her lack of respect, I will address it by not addressing it : focusing on what I should do, not what she expects me to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/21 11:18 AM
1

OYS # 3 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 77 kg, 17% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : NMMNG x2, MMSLP, Currently reading Book of Pook and WISNIFG Previous goals: • SFTU -> not met • Be consistent in my efforts in DoD -> met • Keep reading (start WISNIFG) -> met • Don’t get butthurt about you guys roughing me up -> no challenge there • Find the courage to open myself to a safe person -> not met. Present situation Haven’t watch porn in a month. I don’t mis…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/21 04:13 PM
1

I’m afraid of how others look at me. Of what they think of me. I know how this is called here - validation. The success I have had so far are mine, but for all of the rest, I still have doubts about my odds of success. For now I’m still working on my plan, I know with efforts I’ll get there. But so far I am still a captive in my head.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/04/21 11:09 AM
1

Yes. I have a big hole where I'm supposed to have my confidence. Impostor syndrome at work, big time beta in my marriage, orbiter with my friends.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/21 12:23 PM
3

OYS # 2 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 77 kg, 17% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : re-reading NMMNG, MMSLP, Book of Pook in progress Previous goals: • More reading (NMMNG, find a safe person to discuss my shit, begin MMSLP) -> met • Measurably less addictive behaviours (no more porn, less video games) -> met : no porn, almost no video game • Keep up the training and consistently measure weight and LBM -> met : 5 trainings / week • Find the courage to …
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/21 12:27 PM
2

I had a draft ready, but re-read it and decided this was likely deering. My wife does most of the shopping. It's time I set the menus to make sure I eat what's good for me.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/21 11:51 AM
1

I think this is the way : plan some time to design menus and cook them in the evening. This will allow fore more precise calories and protein intakes as well since it won't be rushed as it is now.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/21 11:45 AM
1

That one will be more challenging. I'm cooking most of our meals at home so I'm completely in control of what goes in our belly, but the menus are limited to : 1. what the kids actually eat and 2. whatever is in the fridge when I realise I need to feed them. Regulating drinks is easy. Managing hunger is easy. Counting calories is something else. However as I'm not here to jerk off and lazily follow some philosophical instructions, it's time to get dedicated to some achievable goals. Instead of h…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/04/21 07:46 AM
3

As I said, finances are in a good place and I don’t need to focus on them now. You can question this, but that’s a hard fact.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/04/21 05:52 AM
2

> By summer I’ll have to rationalise my earnings and spendings Why not now? I don't need to now. Still having huge expenses from completing the house, spending is very irregular, it would be wasted energy. I'm focusing on the stuff that needs changing.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/21 09:56 PM
3

Your life sucks. You cover up this sad fact by distracting yourself with porn and video games. This is correct. I'm numbing myself to be able to go to sleep, same as drinking, except the hangover comes now instead of the next day. It was the easiest way to get some time on my own without having to struggle for it with my wife. I should just have taken it to do meaningful things.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/21 09:55 PM
5

OYS # 1 Me: 37 yo, 176cm, 77.4 kg, 17% BF, wife: SAHM 32, together 7 years, married 5 of them, 2 kids (G 4.5 yo, B1.5 yo) Reads : re-reading NMMNG, starting Book of Pook, will begin MMSLP as soon as possible. Overall state and history Found that I’m a Nice Guy 3 years ago, read NMMNG, marginally acted on it. 10 days ago, reached out a new low in my relationship with my wife, realised I had thrown away any good advice from the book and got back to being secretive and having covert contracts. Star…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/21 11:57 AM
1

Noob here, hated sports for years, I'm in. Let's beat this shit.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/21 09:00 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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