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Innanaspeaks Archive

View 2 posts and 197 comments by Innanaspeaks on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
521

CULTURAL MISOGYNYInnanaspeaks/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 10:35 AM
113

MESSAGE FOR MALE LURKERSInnanaspeaks/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 08:52 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
4

He should have paid her for childcare or she should have gone back to full time work and split child costs 50/50
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 11:15 AM
11

Thats an acknowledgement of looks, not sexual desire. Im not sure men can distinguish between the two.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 08:31 AM
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Never. Ever. Ever. Men thinking about having sex with me- so gross. Not into that.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 08:22 AM
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Kind of for me. I have only dated metalheads/Goths etc. I will no longer date any Scousers (liverpudlians) or neurodivergent guys. Also put off by Scandinavian type guys (tall, blonde, blue eyes). Sex wise- nothing has changed. Im still not into anything kinky and think bdsm is cringe as hell. I like tantric.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 09:08 AM
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I think we are at cross purposes. Its unequal desire for that specific relationship dynamic, you are correct. I will never have a desire for that kind of dynamic. But that's not to say that we dont have equal desire and love for each other within the relationship. The clingy guys may interpret my actions as lack of desire for them - but its not. Its just not how I like to be in relationships. Luckily I have found a guy who is compatible.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 06:50 PM
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Im saying that 'avoidant' behaviour is not always a sign of lack of interest. I dont need any help. Ive never had any issues with dating. Ive had a great relationship for the last 20 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 06:23 PM
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I dont think this applies to everyone. It applies to you. Im a woman who some might perceive as avoidant, but im neurodivergent. No matter how much im into someone I dont want to be with them all the time. I never want good morning or good night texs. I dont want texts everyday. I like space. I have issues with object permanence and never miss anyone. I can be passionate and fall in love but over the years ive found most guys to be clingy and overwhelming and thats extreamly annoying and off put…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 05:25 PM
4

Noone is happy all the time. Goths are just the same as other people. Teens in any subculture tend to be moody. As for colours, there are tonnes of subcultures with colourful fashion e.g. Decora, Candy Raver, Pastel Goth, Hippie etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 10:29 AM
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Yes. Signs on thier own dont mean anything but taken togther they can indicate interest. Treating you differently/ special to everyone else Paying rapt attention whenever you talk, even if they are in conversation with someone else they will break off to listen to you or join your conversation. Following up on your recommendations for music , tv etc. Remembering small details about you Thier face lighting up when they first see you Finding a way to be close to you as much as possible Never missi…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 09:26 AM
5

Im.a radical feminist and know of 2 men (boys) who were raped by women / girls whilst drunk. I absolutely class it as rape but the men laughed it off when they told me. It was rape and they deserve justice.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 08:57 AM
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100% met all my hookups and all my relationships in the rock bar or rock club. Ive had 3 long relationships in adulthood - all started as a make out at the rock club. All warm approach. 50/50 I approached/they approached.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 09:23 AM
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If its obvious what the polite nerdy guy wants (I.e. your number) you are just awkwardly waiting for him to ask so you can reject him. I dont like rejecting people, its awkward and makes me feel bad. Id just ratger not be in that position. (Its not just nerdy guys id reject. I have a type).
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:15 AM
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As someone who was hot but also autistic I had a lot of guys friends because i seemed to get on with them better than women. (They were never close best friends though) Then I became single and 100% of them hit on me. I realised that they were never actually friends, they just wanted to fuck me - and admitted as such. My social skills never mattered to them. They thought I was cringe and annoying but a hot goth girl -so they put up with having me around. Women have a higher social skills thresho…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 08:41 AM
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I plan dates, I pay my own way etc. I check in regularly but i dont text all day ir every day- I find that annoying.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 10:29 PM
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I met a man out if the blue on a work trip in a bar. I noticed him in a crowd and he noticed me and the rest is history.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:54 PM
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When i was dating the issues were: Visually boring guys - non- descript apprarance, no skincare or grooming. Im Goth - even the metalheads just looked like boring Dad rockers. Clingy, needy men who constantly contacted me from early morning to late night and expected to spend every moment they could with me. It was suffocating. Linked to.above- wanting to commit straight away, locking me down from the first date - and then go straight to watching box sets in pjs. I can do that without a guy. At …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 04:58 PM
13

Images do not arouse me. I have a reactive desire. Nudes or sexting is the opposite of sexy to me. So id never pay for OF or similar. Strippers/ gigalos may look good but 1. I would not be confident that they desire me and 2. Im not into community dick. Clarification: my reactive desire is in person only. I need a physical person to react to.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 04:29 PM
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I can only speak for myself. I dont think the majority of men are ugly. I think they are just non-descript, bland- there is nothing interesting to look at. No NPC could ever get my attention. The clothing is just boring jeans and tshirt in black or blue, the hair is just there, the facial hair is just there, there is no intentional styling, no accessories- i cant face spending my life with someone who does not visually exite me. Womwn have a lot more ways to stand out. (Im all for more self expr…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 10:46 AM
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Ive known several Nice guys over the years. The basic thing they misunderstand is they are attracted but they have no idea how to create attraction on the other side - or indeed an appreciation that the woman needs to feel attraction. They operate by 'covert contracts' and refuse to engage in flirting to build tension. They overstep into the boyfriend role when they dont have that status, likr its a trial run. They dont undetstand how awkward that is. I also feel that they have an idealised imag…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 12:13 PM
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Its is an established medical fact that sperm quality absolutely declines with age. In fact specifically sperm has been linked to certain conditions. Think of it this way- its fresh produce each time.... but its made on old equipment. Studies of womens age regarding birth conditions did not take the age of the father into account. This is now being studied. Sure, womens eggs ripen in the folicule each month - but they were all origionally made on brand new equipment, and just kept in stasis. (In…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:48 AM
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I am not a sex worker. GFE is an experience where the encounter includes more of a 'relationship/romantic' element rather than purely just the actual act. This could be kissing, petting, emotonal connecting, going out to dine or hanging out and watching netflix- whatever the guy wants. Its more expensive usually, than the regular type physical encounter. I think the online GFE is a more modern take on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 02:22 PM
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Girlfriend experience is a physical encounter (with a romantic element added). Not sure what you think its.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 08:36 AM
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I think the difference between men and women is in actual attraction. I see average to good looking people of both sexes regularly. Im more inclined to compliment women because im looking at her style, her accessories and makeup/hair. I find mainstream mens clothes very boring, not interesting to me. (Clean cut styles are an total turn-off). I can appreciate that a man may be average to good looking - but im not going to be physically attracted the way a man might be to an average or good lookin…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 12:00 PM
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I would think he wanted to be left alone , perhaps he might be mysanthropic. We had a young guy like this in my office. He wasn't well liked because he didn't seem like he liked other people. Where as you might go out of your way to help out colleagues you connect with - people who make a point to welcome you and make you feel at ease - nobody would do that for him i.e. he built up no social equity. If a girl was trying to get his attention then I'd advise her to give up as its obviously unwante…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 12:24 PM
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Women just don't express thier attraction overtly. If im attracted to a guy, I keep it to myself. I dont cat call him, I dont eye- fuck him, I generally don't approach till im 99% sure id like to interact with him further. One reason is that guys tend to think that initial interaction means a home-run. The repercussions of changing my mind are not worth it. Secondly, I may desire sex (with no particular object of desire) but I dont seek out a partner because Im uncomfortable exposing my naked bo…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 05:32 AM
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My ex looked so much like Eddie Vedder that he went by the nickname Ed. The guy after that was a 6ft ripped Viking (by decent) with waist length blonde hair. Pitty he was a dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/26 10:31 PM
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That was me too. I liked metalheads, especially Viking looking ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/26 10:13 PM
1

It depends on the subject- if its something we have in common them im interested- if its football, anime or video games then im definitely not interested and its probably an indicator that we arent suited- because ill never want to share in or listen to anything about them in a relationship- which is not really fair on the other person.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/26 01:53 PM
1

They are ugly and do ruin a nice outfit. But it wouldn't be a deal breaker.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/26 09:10 AM
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Id really like it if guys would stop love-bombing- even if it's unintentional. I like to ease into things. I hate it when ive just met a guy and suddenly hes spamming me with 'Good morning/goodnight' texts and all day texting. (I don't like to text). I find it really off -putting when they say things like 'i can't stop thinking about you' or 'i think about you all of the time'. Its makes me think they don't have a life. I hate it when a guy ive just met tries to monopoloise my time. I dont expec…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 12:49 PM
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Going for men who have the confidence to approach you is a great way to filter out shy guys with social anxiety. I dont want those guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 10:31 AM
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I've had male friends who wanted to date me and we have stayed friends after I rejected them. Does that fit? They have succeeded in dating after this and if pressed I would say that I am much better looking than than their current partners by quite a bit. These guys liked other women, other than myself whilst we were friends and those women were much much better looking than themselves, and much more socially active/popular. If you want background- I'm a massive history/fantasy geek and tend to …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 10:27 AM
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Even if a woman doesn't work , odds on she does inside of the home. That's unpaid labour. I'm very much in favour of wages for home makers.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 07:24 AM
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Did you ever read the series? The point was that she never liked any of it, she tried it once and broke up with him cause she hated it. She stopped him doing it. He only did it because he was broken. She was so amazing that she fixed him and they had a normal relationship and lived happily ever after. It was a silly series but it didn't promote bdsm, but the opposite- which is why the bdsm community hates it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/25 08:20 AM
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Its the compatibility bit- compatibility is not attraction. People have different styles and ways of expressing themselves sexually. If they do not match or at least complement each other then there is no compatibility. Personally, I've been there - insane mutual attraction but the sex was just not clicking e.g. I like it soft and tender and he liked it hard and aggressive and neither of us was willing to compromise so we split up and found ourselves someone better sexually compatible with.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 08:31 AM
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Thank you x
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 07:22 AM
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You are using the term 'Sexual compatibllty' wrong- it doesn't mean you are attracted to each other- that's 'sexual attraction". Sexual compatibility is about matching sex drives, kinks etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 06:58 AM
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Or to get out of an awkward conversation?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 08:03 AM
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Why would loyalty make up for attraction? You can't negotiate attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/25 07:52 AM
4

What about the times when a guy wanted to commit but the woman didn't. Is it still traumatic fir her??? All my hook ups remained that way due to my choice. The vast majority were open to more. The ones I chose became relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/25 07:00 AM
0

Its about consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/25 06:56 AM
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Thats because those features are hyper feminine. If she was tall, built like a line backer, had a heavy jaw and a prominent brow ridge she would be seen as less attactive- but her brother with the same features would be seen as more attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 07:30 PM
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Women are socialised to try to preserve people's feelings. Plus, I dont really care enough to get into it with someone I don't really know or care about. Its easier to give platitudes than to say 'you are ugly and boring' and then have to feel bad about it. I once told my mum that I turned down a guy and when he asked why I told him it was because he was fat which was the truth. My mum was shocked and then seriously mad at me about it and told me I should have lied. Everyone agreed with her. Bac…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 05:13 PM
9

We do! Its called the 'I don't care club'. Its a real thing, look it up. :)
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 08:03 AM
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I met my partner at age 30. He was 40. He genuinely looked 30 and acted my age and we got each other's references. There are only minor things that give away the age difference. The main thing is that we were both at the same life stage. Both established in our careers, owned our own home and car etc. And neither had been married or had kids before (through choice)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/25 08:06 AM
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That's exactly how it is with my partner now. Its been 20 years. We give each other a lot of space which i think has helped our relationship. I was exclusive with my partner in my mind before we even had the chat because I didn't feel so attracted and connected to anyone else. I never have since. We are very compatible. If i was to be single ever again i dont think id bother dating, even for sex. Im happy to have had my partner and I dont want anyone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 12:56 PM
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My experience is completely the opposite. Even if I explicitly said beforehand that I dont want a relationship or to see them again, I still had 100% of hook ups ask for a relationship. I find men to be completely clingy and needy. That's my number 1 turn off. I need a lot of personal space.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 09:55 AM
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Depends. If I'm in a relationship then yes - I've had 4 longer term relationships - but in-between I've slept with guys who I do not want to see again. I don't sleep with typical jock types so maybe that plays into it - but I find most guys are clingy and needy as hell. Its very off-putting. Current relationship is 20 years and I still think he's sexy.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/25 11:22 AM
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I don't. Its me who is only looking for a hook up and the guys cant deal with it. Every guy I slept with asked for a relationship. That was never an option and I was up front about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/25 09:32 AM
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As a teacher i think ii probably marked boys lower because they just pissed me off with their behaviour. If anyone was disruptive and ruining it for everyone else you can bet it was a boy.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 05:38 AM
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Personally, id need to warm up to a guy i.e. flirting. Hed need to make me feel things like tension , chemistry. Remember that most women have a reactive sexuality. If a guy came at me cold from a platonic friendship then a revelation of his feelings would leave me ...cold. Without chemistry it would be an automatic no. Have you been flirting? Playfully wrestling , cuddling etc. Additinally- gifts or acts of service do nothing for me personally. They don't make me sexually or romantically attrac…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/25 06:31 AM
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Agreed. I find being a furry just as silly as all that BDSM or roleplay stuff. I wouldn't be able to keep a straight face. Its all just so cringe.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/25 08:29 AM
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Sorry to butt in. The services or attention thing? Isnt that just friendship? It goes both ways. I've sewn guys clothes for them and at another point they've fixed my laptop. If a guy friend flirts with me, i don't class him as a friend. He's an acquaintance. Guy friends are only creeps to me when they start trying to date me covertly. Suddenly theyre buying me thoughtful gifts when they never used to , or trying to pay for my coffee. They might try to sit next to me all the time and spend much …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 08:45 AM
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Or they have grown and learned and want someone else who is likewise healed and at peace.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 09:33 PM
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Of course if someone is emotionally damaged in some way, even if its not their fault its going to make them less appealing as a partner. I don't know many people who want to help someone they just started dating through a trauma. One reason that ill probably not date again if i ever lost my partner is that I've dealt with my trauma. Im at peace. I really don't want to rake it all up again with someone else. If i did meet someone else they probably wouldn't be happy with me not wanting to share a…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 09:32 PM
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Yes. Its a part of life. We live and learn and sometimes we screw up. Maybe some guys still hurt when they remember but ive forgotten it - just like i cringe or hurt when i recall past things but the perpetrator doesnt remember it. That's life. We grow, we move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 10:10 AM
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No. It wasn't compliment. He was a dirty horndog and it was a shameful thing to have hooked up with him. He was just the lead singer in a band and he was persistent.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 10:08 AM
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I'm from the UK. My housemate was a singer in a rock band and he got lots of women but not women he particularly wanted. It was well known in the rock club that he was 'community dick' - and any woman with other options avoided him like the plague. He was good looking enough that he might pull an unsuspecting hottie who was new to the club- but usually women would grab her in the loo and warn her lol! No one wants to be embarrassed by dating community dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 09:07 AM
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Incel is used as a term to bully. Its just another slur word. Its not deeper than that. Teenagers are trying out social power, learning social skills and being tribalistic and exclusionary is part of that. They are also learning flirting skills. I know i used and abused flirting at that age. I was learning what worked and what didn't. I wasnt trying to hurt boys or lead them on, though im sure i did at times. I was a stupid clueless 13 year old. Teenagers are little shits. On another note - deni…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 09:01 AM
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Its totally an insult. Ever heard the term 'community dick'?. No woman wants to date community dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 08:17 AM
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Im a woman and a feminist but im fair enough to agree that it is a problem. I know of one case of 'targeted impregnation' on a drunk boy (jokes on her - his family might of owned a huge house but they were broke) . I know of a few ' accidents ' too. Lying about birth control is rape. Its the same as stealthing. The person wouldn't have consented to sex if they knew. Its definitely a problem. Any baby trapping needs to be publically shamed.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/25 10:28 AM
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It really depends on my mood and what I'm doing - plus, gotta be my type. I'm Goth and if a mainstream guy approached me it would be an automatic no. I saw a really hot Metal guy in the supermarket. I complimented his beard. He looked happy enough to accept the compliment but not receptive to anything else- so i ended it there. I think thats okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 08:32 AM
3

Additionally- how she feels about herself is really important. Since I've gained weight the thought of being seen naked fills me with dread, no matter how horny i am.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 09:51 AM
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More often its just making out. I've been going to the same club with mostly the same people for 30 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 03:49 PM
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Seriously, hypothetically i could walk into the rock club and shout ' free vagina ' and a queue of guys would form. Lol. Its not a flex. They just have no discrimination. They tend to go to the club to pull. I go to dance. I'm rarely off the dance floor. Its a close knit scene- most people have slept with each other at some point. Lol. I met my partner in a rock club at the other end of the country. His dating history is very similar to mine.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 01:53 PM
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Nope. Approx 25 total. 4 long term relationships since 15. I'm 50 now and been with my partner since i was 30.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 11:52 AM
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Ive had tones of hook ups- mostly ugly or fat guys. The reason was that i was drunk and horny. This is usual for the rock scene. Some of them i had considered dating but the sex was bad or something put me off them so i didn't pursue it. My current partner of 20 years started as a one night stand but he just charmed me and i wanted more of him in my life. Hookups- i barely like them. I get rid of them as soon as possible. Some im cordial with if i see them. Only a couple of guys i ever slept wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 08:11 AM
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Whilst i agree with most of that- simping rarely works out as it doesn't build genuine desire. The only options i see are betabux in the redpill definition or work on flirting skills somehow.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 02:47 PM
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I'm 50 so very experienced. I am very sure that I don't use guys. Once I understood, I refused gifts and acts of service and ensured that I always paid for myself. I was always careful not to flirt. I always ensure that I reciprocate drinks etc. I don't want to give these guys any fuel for their covert contracts. I'm not sure what its about me that attracts nice guys. I'm short and petite and I've been told I'm pretty. I'm kind, very friendly and stereotypically feminine. I just seem to attract …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 12:57 PM
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I've known several nice guys over the years. The main problem with nice guys is their use of ' covert contracts'. That is where you do something with the expectation of reward without ever informing the other person e.g. helping themmove house then expecting a date. The other person is not aware what they are accepting when they accept the moving help- if they had known they could chose to accept or refuse. Its usually a reward that is not equal and involves dating or spending time e.g. its not …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 07:27 AM
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I love cargo shorts! I had to talk my partner into getting some. He has exceptional calves that need showing off. Lol. I love sweat pants and absolutely hate jeans. Lol Clean- cut guys in designer outfits or suits are an automatic turn off for me. We call guys in button ups 'shirt-boys' here. P.s Im a Goth and hang in alt circles.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/25 07:29 AM
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Im Goth. I've had metalhead long term partners (3.5 years and 7 years) and both changed their style - one started to dress 60s/70s and the other went punk. There were other issues - but aesthetically i just wasn't attracted. No, i dont like your boot cut cords or your ugly shoes, no i dont like your skinhead or harrington jacket (or comedy tees). My current partner is artistic and very into style and i love it. He sews and customises his clothes. We encourage each other to develop our styles - f…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/25 07:17 AM
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My friend had the exact opposite . In photos he was good looking, smouldering and sexy but once he moved he was camp as hell. So many women turned him down once they met in person. He was the epitome of unsexy. Really odd. Conversely another guy was objectively quite sickly looking, not good looking at all - but the way he spoke to me and the glances he gave me turned me to jelly.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 09:22 AM
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Its the nature in which the question is asked. My friends never really ask this question. When we did as teens we were shamed if we mentioned anything looks related. They were parroting others. If a stranger/ colleague asks then its easier to give a non controversial answer and not engage further. If a guy friend asks, then most people dont want to hurt thier feelings by excluding them so generic answers are given. If im forced to answer ill give a hyperbolic answer like 'looks like Henry Cavil'…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:20 AM
3

Will do. Later on tonight. :)
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/25 03:04 PM
1

Its only an issue if they want to pursue a relationship and these things prevent it. If its not preventing that with other people then its not an issue. For me they are issues- a personality clash. They may be able to change with straight forward advice e.g. "its hurtful to point out peoples acne. There is no benefit in it and its hurtful". They could try appreciating that a relationship should serve both partners not just one. e.g. its nice when your girlfriend watches you play video games, wou…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/25 02:25 PM
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Yes. Im autistic myself. I have had the following issues: black and white thinking especially when it comes to gender roles. limited sphere of interest. They only want to talk about thier own niche interests and do what they want to do. I was expected to join in thier interests but when it came to mine they wanted me to find a friend to do it with instead. difficulties with teasing and banter. They took it personally, got upset and then over- retaliated. difficulties recognising when interest wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/25 01:00 PM
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Without doubt its Sir Terry Pratchett/ Tiffany Aching .
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 11:12 AM
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I can't stand cuddling after sex and I'm never sleepy. I have to get up, make a drink and do sonething. Its not about emotions its about what my body wants to do. Once sex is over for me, its over. Im a woman by the way.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/24 08:13 AM
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I don't really want to dedicate time and effort on a date if the initial conversation doesn't flow. I'd rather spend the night watching tv or grabbing to my mates than spend time with some stranger guy if I didnt already have a strong suspicion it was going to work out well. It's like a predate. I think dates should be for when you are actually into someone, not to test the waters.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/24 03:36 PM
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I'm holding my hand up here. I've fucked plenty of guys who I has absolutely no interest in, didnt particularly fancy them either- just drunk and horny. Every single one asked me to go out with the afterwards. I turned most of them down. Not interested (also been proposed to 4 times and turned them all down).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 08:34 AM
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They had an entire school just for boys. It was an academic school with lessons designed just for males. I know that the school valued academia. I have no idea why this did not translate to the boys. They had the same trips to visit universities girls school so I don't see why they didnt consider that needed the grades to get in. They just preffered to mess about whilst the girls grafted. P.s the competition between the girls was never instigated by the school. It was us that put that pressure o…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/24 09:25 AM
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The educational differences I think are cultural. My experience may be different from most people- I went to an all girls school that had an entrance exam. It was heavily STEM focused. We girls heavily valued academic achievement. Our grades for homework were read out best to worst at the start of every lesson and it was a competition to get into the top 3. We were constantly reminded to focus on our futures. In comparison, the boys school (same academic level) had no such values. I was often ag…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/24 08:17 AM
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I know but I wanted to join in.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 03:27 PM
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Tangerines are orange Tangerines are sweet Tangerines are juicy And lots of fun to eat!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 09:47 AM
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Cold approach in a bar- great. Thats about 99% of how I've met people. ( I'm a woman btw. I approached my partner because I thought he looked hot) Cold approach on public transport, in a coffee shop or a supermarket? Hell no.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/24 12:38 PM
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Im in the UK- its very common for women to approach men. In my current relationship I approached him first, and in my previous ones it was 50/50. I started dating in the90s and I asked out my first boyfriend. It was normal. The thing is that, like all of my friends (we have discussed this)- we just don't find that many men attractive enough at first sight to make an approach. When I was single I wasn't actively looking for anything - relationship or hook up. I was happy to wait as long as it tak…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 09:26 AM
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This has been my exact experience over and over. My first boyfriend wanted a Goth girlfriend- and I changed from bookish nerd to a Goth. He wanted long hair so I grew it etc. Since then I've stayed Goth because I genuinely love it but I've met so many men who think they can change that and mould me into what they prefer bi guy wanted to masculinise me (I'm petite and feminine- it would never work) guys in uni wanted to de-Goth me. punks wanted me punk Comic book geek wanted me to tone it down an…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/02/24 09:53 AM
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I'm the complete opposite! (Also a woman btw) I've never ever grown attraction over time. Its either there at the start or it isn't. However, I'm not into the usual Brad Pitt type face- it's all about quirky features for me. Its face above everything else. All my relationships (except. my first at 15) started out as casual sex- even planned one night stands. But- everyone I've had sex with has asked me to be thier girlfriend - so maybe I judged it well. Not sure. Obviously I rejected the majorit…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/24 12:19 PM
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Kt using that system. It's too much. I'm a Goth - the first thing I look for is visual indications of compatibility- Goth or Metalhead. ( no Punks, Emos or Alt rockers/Indie). Physical Attractiveness - I like a characterful face. I like masculinity and the body needs to be within average ranges for height and weight. Sense of style- I love great outfits. Only then will I check for the other things- the personality, the morals, the capability (can function as an adult). The guy needs to pass each…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/24 09:13 AM
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That's good. I've heard it described as 'auditioning for the role of boyfriend '- like 'this is how I would treat you if you were with me'. But unless you are actually the boyfriend, it can be seen as creepy.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 02:01 PM
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For me it's the old thing about 'romantic or creepy". If you fancy someone their behaviour is seen as romantic, if you don't then its seen as creepy. I'm a woman who has male friends fall for her, like most women. The thing I dislike is that once I know a friend likes me romantically or sexually they are viewing me through those lenses and I don't like it. Examples from my life are: ' shes curled up in a blanket- that's so sweet and cute" ' you looked really hot in that dressing gown' And the ad…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 11:40 AM
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True. Most men I meet just want to trauma dump all over me even if it's the first time we met in a platonic situation. One guy just relived every argument he had with his ex wife - it was a bit scary.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/23 06:59 AM
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I do think women find money important. The reason being is that in general women have been less socialised to find financially supporting their partners acceptable, whereas a lot of men expect to be in.this position. Personally, I'm okay with a guy with a similar or slightly lower income than me in a relationship ( I've always been the higher earner). I want a guy who can support himself and pay his way in the most part. (not withstanding brief periods of unemployment). My partner finds the conc…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/23 08:39 AM
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I can see that would be frustrating but I know a lot of women feel the same way as me. Once you form a platonic bond , the thought of getting physically intimate with that guy is just impossible. You just don't see him that way. Whereas for guys they can still see women friends in a sexual light. It's a fundamental difference. I give the advice that if a guy ever wants to develop a relationship- never become really close friends with a woman. Always keep that distance- be in the friendship circl…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/23 02:10 PM
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This is me. Once I'm close friends with a guy ( not just friend of a friend - but meeting one on one and sharing feelings etc) I am never able to see him in a sexual light. It's just not possible. I'm happy to do all if that in a relationship - but the sexual feelings and attraction must come first.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/23 10:27 AM
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I really feel sorry for you. This much hate eats you up inside. I wish only peace for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 12:08 PM
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Says who? Where is this written? Its my life to do whatever i want with. I'm childfree and not marrying. I'm far from useless. I can't say what my job actially is but its in Intelligence. I save lives. I'm also the primary earner - so again, not useless.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 09:00 AM
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Respect means basic human decency. Its got nothing to do with sex. Dating is discriminatory by its very nature. Am i supposed to fuck every guys who wants me just so i don't hurt his feelings?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 11:06 PM
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I think its because most women sex drive is reactive. If a guy can't flirt or build tesion then hes basically asexual to me . I don't want a relationship where my guy can't turn me on, that's a dead bedroom. (d my part in turning him on- its not one sided) Its unfortunate but amount of having your shit together translates into 'sexy".
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 02:02 PM
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Because you'll always be the guy that it took effort and time to find attractive- versus the guys that she wanted straight away. Personally, I'm attracted straight away or it never happens. Its the interaction that gives me 'tingles/ butterflies/extitement'. If its not there initially its never going to develop- but that's just me.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 10:56 AM
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I know its been a strain with my patents friends when the husband retires but still expects the wife to do all the cooking and cleaning. Plus when my Dad retired he went full- on old man. He stopped showering and wore the same clothes. He hoarded stuff and stopped going out. It was probably depression. My Mum joined clubs, went to the gym, saw her friends every week and my Dad resented her for it. Guess he wanted her to rot with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/23 10:25 AM
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I was thinking more that guys like the emotional closeness that a relationship supplies , which they don't necessarily have with their friends. I guess dick is in abundance for most women, as long as we are not too picky. Most women i know are very picky though- anonymous dick is not really my style or my friends style .
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 10:17 AM
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This is true. I've been engaged twice and turned down 2 further proposals. I've never slept with a guy without him asking for a some kind of relationship afterwards. I put this down to them not getting lucky much and wanting a regular supply- im realistic that whilst im alright, im not a 10/10. Most guys i know want relationships more than women i know. (There are lots of reasons for this)
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/23 09:03 AM
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As a Goth who has only ever dated Goths/ Metalheads - when i say i like Goths/Metalheads , i mean Goth guys/Metalheads that im attracted to. 5/10 Goth is still a 5/10 to me. A mainstream guy is like background- doesnt even register to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 09:33 AM
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I got what you said but what can we do when guys want to make up their own reasons? They are drawing wrong conclusions and creating a narrative around it. What do you want us to do about that?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 02:11 PM
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You are right when completely sober but add alcohol into the mix. I think I've actually been sexually attracted to 5% of the guys I've fucked. Completely substanceless and the guy is 100% interchangeable and forgettable. And as for going gay , ive known straight girls go round clubs asking women to make out because they are drunk and horny- but dont want to make out with a guy as they get carried away and expect more. Thats why i don't drink when i go out any more. It makes me horny and i make p…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 02:09 PM
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You said you don't understand - so i explained it. If men dont want to understand womens reasons for what they do and instead make their own narrative that's on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 11:36 AM
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You think women.bond with every man they sleep with? You think women only sleep with guys they are attracted to? Lol. How about drunk and horny? Then hopefully you never see them ever again.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 10:48 AM
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Guy : you dont want a relationship with hum so you dont care what he thinks of you. You are never going to see him again - or if you do on a very casual basis you still dont care. You use him for sex but he's not good enough to invest your life with . Guy 2: you think you have a future with so you care very much what he thinks of you, so every move is very considered. You want to build emotions before sex. Sex is not a reward. Thats not how women think of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/23 10:39 AM
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I don't see a problem with that. Why would i be looking to add difficulties into my life?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/23 10:57 AM
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As an autistic woman- no. My weirdness does not mean i tolerate other peoples weirdness. If anything I'm more likely to find his adjustments and needs incompatible with mine. You are just doubling the issues in the relationship. Please stop telling autistic guys to seek out autistic women. I've seen short ugly NT guys do so much better with women than tall, hansome autistic guys. Doesnt matter what someone looks like if they make me uncomfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/23 08:00 AM
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The guys i was talking about were guests unfortunately so it makes it harder to pinpoint the episode. Yes, i believe imogen was jn it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/23 07:16 AM
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Is it that old??? Surely not 15 years ago lol. I honestly can't pinpoint the episode series. The autistic guy was tall and dark haired, bad skin guy was dirty blonde- maybe cockney? They went on a booze cruise on the last day. It was maybe something like 3rd series. Don't think the the fat guy was the boss at the time. The welsh twat was in it though. Maybe a scouse girl??? I remember the autistic guy following one girl from the pool to the bar and monotone asking questions 'so, you said you lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 07:00 PM
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Depends on whether they are willing to work on social skills. I personally have not met an autistic guy who i liked the personality of. It could just be my experience but the ones i met were self-centered and narcissistic. They wanted everything on thier own terms all of the time and refused to temper comments or keep their views to themselves under the guise of 'the truth shouldn't hurt'. The black and white thinking played into beleivinh in rigid gender roles which im not keen on. Personally I…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 12:57 PM
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Im an autistic woman who have male family members who are autistic. They are good looking guys but they can't mask for long. I have had autistic male friends try to date me. These are their social mistakes. Flat aspect- they are hard to listen to, with no rise and fall in tone. They info dump and can't read the signals about when to stop. They zone out when the conversation isn't interesting to them - sometimes being quite blunt about it. They can't do small talk- which builds tension and bonds …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/23 08:57 AM
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My personal story. I get pretty horny around ovulation. I'm more likeky to dress up and go out drinking and dancing. Im more likely to meet a guy (I've never used Tinder). Alcohol also makes me really horny. So I've had quite a few one night stands. (Bad judgement) None of the guys have been hot, none of the sex was any good (for me) and the big issue is that... I'm really good at sex. This is not kinky, not that way but i show desire, i touch all over the body, i connect deeply for that moment.…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/23 06:24 AM
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Its just an example of how its a whole -body condition . I have a few neurodivergent conditions and i train people on neurodiversity. I have developed a training programme for the government. Its a really interesting feild. I always knew i was different from other people - but it was being threatened with a disciplinary for botching 'menial " tasks while highly performing at work , that pushed me for a diagnosis. Associated conditions i experience are ARFID, PMDD, EDS - and probably more. It has…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 10:33 AM
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There are a couple of things to note. Autism is a whole- body condition. It does affect your looks on a genetic level- certain facial ratios are common to Autistics (Autism face), the gait can be affected by EDS and the gut is affected which impacts nutrition (also ARFID). Also lots of little things like Autistic people are more likely to have a double crown, and 90% (estimate) of autistic women have PMDD. Autism is not correlated with high intellect -no more than the wider populace. I am Autist…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 09:32 AM
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Or maybe it indicates that you're not going to get all obsessed, clingy and needy. It indicates that you are not suddenly making the woman the centre of your world and will expect her to coddle you and cheer lead for you and become your only source of emotional support etc That would totally set you apart from other guys. As you might guess from what i wrote- it seems that there are so many guys out there with scarcity mindset that they become obsessive very quickly. Simping is 100% indicator fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/23 09:18 AM
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I wrote about this previously. Some guys try to date by stealth using covert contracts rather than social skills. They offer gifts and acts of service in the hope of eliciting feelings. The see the acceptance of these as acceptance of courtship. They see this as an audition for boyfriend status which they think they are entitled to since the object of affection accepted their gifts or acts. Its a doomed strategy. Gifts and favours do not elicit romantic/ sexual feelings in most women. As much as…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/23 09:00 AM
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In my personal experience it is about 60%. A lot of it stems from low self esteem- being unable to escalate, refusing to learn how to flirt and build tension. (Its too hard! Its not "me'!, why do I have to do this?) There was a guy on here who said that he sets his sights on a girl and he either builds a whole romance in his head, so when he finally approaches or ' confesses' his emotions are very strong, overwhelming- or the opposite, he thinks that on paper they would be a good match and so as…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/23 10:27 AM
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It depends what your demographic for dating is? Do you want a trendy woman? As a Goth, I've only ever dated metal heads and Goths (and briefly one punk). I would not be compatible with a 'normie'. My friend circle are between 35-60. All Goths, metal heads and punks. All high performing profesionals (HR, Drs, Various other medical professions, Professors, Business owners etc). Most dress pretty alternative on a daily basis and go for it on nights out. The places we go have people ages 20-70- most…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/23 07:41 AM
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Of course if I liked a guy I'd find a natural opportunity to introduce myself to him. Even having autism, i still approach people, including other women I'd like to be friends with. That's how the world works. People who stand around waiting to be noticed are not going to get anywhere generally speaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/23 01:21 PM
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If I'm understanding this correctly, you say that if a guy isn't speaking to you or acting like he likes you back- then women should just keep pursuing him anyway? Personally I'd feel like that would be harassment on my part.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/23 09:06 AM
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The other day, I had a guy cross the road to congratulate my partner on me. He wanted to shale his hand. Wtf??
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/23 11:40 AM
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It's called Sissy Hypno porn. It gives a sense of euphoria from the hyno element and the taboo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 09:03 AM
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Don't forget: Men are the more rational gender; women are the emotional and irrational ones! / s
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