TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Lazy-Design1979 Archive

View 0 posts and 190 comments by Lazy-Design1979 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
14

Any time I see a story of "I'm pregnant and it's my job to pay all pregnancy-related expenses" I'm like "so, immaculate conception, huh? It's not his kid?" Why on EARTH would someone agree to that kind of an arrangement? These men need to be named and shamed. It's the absolute LEAST you can do as the person who isn't going to have to give birth to the child.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:47 PM
2

Ew! That guy sounds like the creepers we used to have on ICQ and MSN Messenger back in the day...no matter who they were talking to it was just sex, sex, sex. No interest in anything else. I truly do not get what the fuss is about!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 03:39 PM
23

To say nothing of the fact it took him like 6 years at least to decide to propose...I don't think this guy loves her. It sounds like he decided he couldn't do better than her and isn't getting any younger, so might as well marry her since after that many years, she's clearly not going to leave him. He's the guy that's going to be crying "divorce rape" in a few years when he decides he wants to leave her for one of his mistresses because his wife is too tired to service him after looking after th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 11:01 AM
25

For me, there is no "right person" that would make me want to have kids - I don't think my body could handle childbirth. I'm also not interested in dating anyone who has kids - even if the child's mother passed away. If I find out they have kids and lied to me about it, the relationship is over - even if we're 6 months in. I'd also have an issue with someone finding out they had a kid they didn't know about - to me, it implies carelessness in using protection at one time, and I'm not into dating…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 10:43 AM
4

There might also be the "my nudes are probably all over the internet anyway so if I might as well continue and make money".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 10:27 AM
7

I'm ace, and every time I see threads like this I always wonder if the guys are just bad at it, or if their partners are actually asexual or demisexual and haven't figured it out yet. The whole "she doesn't initiate it and she doesn't seem into it" could describe me to a T - sex does absolutely nothing for me and I couldn't care less about it. I didn't figure it out until my mid-late thirties.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 06:56 PM
32

Yeah, I'm really skeptical of those numbers - considering those sorts of men try to pressure women into sending them nudes for free, I find it hard to believe that they'd drop that kind of money. I also think OF is designed to lure and hook women who are desperately in need of cash and gets them used to it so they don't want to or can't stop, without really thinking of the consequences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 06:44 PM
51

Nope. Pass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 03:42 PM
37

Right? I'm not a chef or anything, but even I can at least manage to feed myself. There's tons of recipe websites everywhere - just follow instructions and you can cook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 11:08 AM
110

To add: this question isn't usually asked in good faith. I promise you these guys aren't that stupid that they don't know why women ghost. If the second time you message me you say stuff that would offend a sailor, what do you think I'm going to do? They know. They just want attention and even some lady yelling at them on Reddit gets them attention. Think about why you see Ask Reddit and Ask Men on the front page always, but NEVER Ask Women. It's because they know and they don't care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 12:23 PM
8

Seconded. I know it looks great for the screenshot and post on social media, but seriously...don't. He doesn't need an intervention ‐ and even if he does, that's not your job. You also don't owe him an explanation of what he did wrong - men aren't stupid. They know. It might take them a couple of years or two, but eventually they'll figure out where they went wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:55 AM
43

This, unfortunately. There are at least 10 other subs I can think of off-hand that he could've posted it and actually got advice. He went there for a reason.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:48 AM
57

Wow. How does it feel to be living rent-free in that guy's head? It's so frustrating when people ask for help, look like they're taking you seriously...and then do the complete opposite.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:45 AM
39

I'm childfree and for me, it's about consideration and thoughtfulness, and not being stingy or petty. If you go out for dinner with a guy and he insists on you paying your share or he "forgets his wallet", he's showing you that he's stingy. If his reasoning for doing so is that he takes loads of girls out on dates and he'd go broke if he had to pay everytime, then he's told you without telling you that he's just in the market for any girlfriend and you're not special to him. If he were the kind …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 12:40 PM
26

Eeeeeewwww! I'm no mathematician, but I know 25 goes into 25 many more times than 63 goes into 25, if you get my drift.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 10:09 PM
28

This is why I think thse principles are more important if you don't consider yourself conventionally attractive. It sounds counterintuitive, but by being selective about who you share your time with even when you're not exactly spoiled for choice, you're sparing yourself some bad experiences. The way I look at it is that if a company is looking to hire an electrician and for some reason the only people who apply are 5 musicians, are they going to hire the best musician of the 5 because that's al…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 10:37 AM
6

This actually happened to me and my parents hit the roof. And this was back in the mid-80s. The arrangement did not last long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 10:21 AM
21

This dude is a money vampire. I've dated a guy like this - just magically bad with money no matter how good the market was. If she wants to salvage things she'd better start looking after the family finances fast. Or better yet, find another childcare arrangement and ditch this guy altogether.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 12:18 PM
62

This is my go-to answer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 11:24 AM
6

Dude, you want ALL THAT and you're in an open relationship? What do you bring to the table?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:50 PM
35

I'm pretty fiscally conservative, so my general rule with stuff like this is that unless I have a wedding band on my finger, I'm not cosigning anything. If you're not related to me by blood, I'm not cosigning anything (and even then that's no guarantee). You have to be very careful and know the person well, because if you do it once they'll keep asking for help, and if they turn out to be irresponsible you're on the hook for it. Paying for your own bad mistakes sucks, but what's even worse is pa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:47 PM
119

Do you know what we never see? This story the other way around, where it's a guy who married a homeless woman. I wonder why that is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 12:20 PM
6

At 16, your biggest worries in life should be homework, pocket money, what to study in college, and what movie you want to see this weekend. Crazy situationships with ridiculous clowns can wait...indefinitely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 02:41 PM
19

Why does he do that? Because they're letting him do that. If I were him, I'd be embarrassed, but we'll skip over that because it sounds like he lacks the capacity to be embarrassed. He's got college age sons, for goodness sake! If I were her, I'd dump him pronto. For her parents, next time they go out to dinner I'd have a word with the server away from the table and pay my portion, then leave. Let him pay for the children he chose to have.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 02:37 PM
22

This is all just lies. I don't know what person who wrote this article is smoking, but none of those points are absolutely true. I'm not sure there's such a thing as a "casual" porn user - everyone I've seen who's into it is into it to the point of dysfunction. There is no "I use a couple times a month" - one hit and it's all they can think about.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 02:29 PM
57

Because if he invests the $2k a month instead and makes a killing, he's totally going to share that money with her! Right guys? Right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 07:45 PM
33

Well, that's frustrating. It's Reddit...what did I expect?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 08:32 PM
63

He's not even a man...he's a 17‐year-old boy! I hope someone gave him the advice to talk to a professional.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 07:27 PM
8

This is very true, and unfortunately I seem to have a few of these people in my life - constantly judging others and able to dish it out but can't take it. It's given me a thick skin, but I've had to cut a couple people out of my life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 11:22 PM
5

It's definitely just to me...on the flip side, I never met an Andy or a Chris I couldn't get along with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 02:47 PM
30

Did she actually get away with it? I always thought I was just uptight or a Victorian-era prude, the amount of flak I got for...not wanting to get arrested lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 02:43 PM
68

Getting arrested isn't my idea of a great date. A movie ticket is what, $20 max? If you're that broke, don't bother.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 02:41 PM
38

He was! The other one was into drugs, but probably also porn. Apparently the name means "beloved"...not by me though. It's a common name, so hopefully my DMs don't get lit up worse than the Habs did against Tampa last night 😑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 01:04 PM
241

Yeah, the fact that he says they haven't talked about being more than friends is a sign that he's reading way too much into that friendship. This guy's about to flush his entire life down the toilet for a relationship that doesn't exist. You can't un-flush it when you realize you've made a mistake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 12:59 PM
230

No wanting to sneak into a movie! Seriously, what adult thinks that's cool? Not into anyone who tries get me in trouble. This is grownup-land where doing something like that could cost you a career.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 12:52 PM
38

Ditto for me with the name David lol...I used to love the name but I can't stand it now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 12:49 PM
197

She's in the exact situation I was terrified of ever ending up in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 08:37 PM
20

I'm in my 40s, so there aren't too many hot single dads at my age lol. I do get the ones that think they can hide the kids for 3 months though or desperately need some help coping with the "every other weekend"...not for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 09:13 PM
63

For me, anyone with kids is a hard pass. This is going to sound selfish, but I don't have or want kids of my own and I certainly don't to raise someone else's. Cats or dogs are fine though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 07:55 PM
57

It affects everything - how do you get a promotion if you're not seen as a person? How do you get elected if you're not seen as a person? How do you get people to listen to your ideas if you're not seen as a person? How do you stand up for your rights if the people oppressing you don't see you as a person? I'm not surprised that it looks like womens' rights are going backwards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 08:42 PM
171

The "conditioning him to have trouble taking you seriously as a person" is especially concerning. A woman can get against porn addicts or choose to be alone instead of putting up with a porn addict, but that line suggests more than just boyfriend/husband troubles. Even if we can control whether or not we're in a relationship with a porn addict, we're still going to have to deal with them at work or in the general public. Even if the estimate is 25% of men (I think that might be on the low side),…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 06:12 PM
44

Nope, these things don't "just happen". He knew exactly what he was sending and who he was sending it to. What he was doing was trying his luck in a way that he could walk it back if you responded negatively. He knew he was risking your friendship by trying to push for more and he rolled the dice anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 04:37 PM
3

How does he do when talking about other areas of his life, like work or his friends or hobbies? If he makes a mistake, does he own it, discuss it, and move on? Or does he shut down or get defensive if a mistake is pointed out to him? If you were to let him talk for 20 min or so, what recurring theme would come up? What stories would he choose to tell you? The reason why I ask is that a lot of narcissists have a victim narrative to them...they'll talk about how badly they were treated by someone …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 04:20 PM
10

Oh yeah...if you don't answer my question that's not good. Evasiveness on simple questions means he's trying to conceal something. I'm more likely to walk away at that point because I don't want someone who's trying to do my thinking for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 12:10 PM
66

This is true...by taking baby steps, they can backpedal if you start to sound suspicious or aren't going in the direction they want you to. They also want to weed out anyone who's going to be a hard sell or not fall for their crap.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 07:20 PM
108

Are there not any BDSM subs that BDSM enthusiasts can post on? Why do they need to take over the dating sites? Like, if that's what you want then fine, but no amount of messaging me is going to convince me to get into it. We've had tons of awareness about kink-shaming - now let's have some awareness about boundary-shaming. You don't have to share my boundary, but you do need to respect it. If someone doesn't want me because of a boundary, I'm not going to want them in my life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 06:42 PM
15

I thought that both acronyms were correct with the former more in use in the USA and the latter in the UK.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 06:35 PM
203

They'll tell the truth one teaspoon at a time to mislead people, and then they can go back and say they never said that. If you have someone like this at work, you want to get them to put it in an email so that there are date and time stamps of what they said and when they said it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 06:28 PM
825

I don't like how he asked a direct question and got a direct answer, then when the question was put to him he was imprecise. Anybody who's shady about things they don't need to be shady about is a red flag. He's a trickle-truther - he'll word everything so that there's plausible deniability.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 06:06 PM
2

Judging by the red flags at the end of her post, she's doing an alarming amount of mental gymnastics explaining why this is a good move, when all evidence says otherwise.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 03:51 PM
9

Yeah...stuff like this can really help with decisions though, because it takes the emotion out of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 03:50 PM
51

Yeah, I just can't with these people. Not to mention, the math doesn't make sense. The way she talks about it, they have 2 options: She moves to hom and takes a 40% pay cut, he continues making about half of what she makes now: 0.6x + 0.5x = 1.1x (not including pension) He moves to her and starts all over again (let's assume same 40% pay cut for him), and she continues making what she does: x + 0.3x = 1.3x (not including pension) Unless the pension is a seriously big deal, she's making a mistake…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 02:35 PM
11

She's thanking this guy for standing up for women, but misses that if he were really standing up for women, he wouldn't have hired the stripper in the first place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 02:22 PM
48

There's a post that make it to the best-of sub about why the "believe all women" message is wrong and gets co-opted bu extremists. I was thinking of proposing the slogan "treat male rape victims the way female rape victims are treated", but I guess that's not very charitable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 08:27 PM
10

People who are trying to shut down female-only websites are making a key mistake: just because you deplatform something doesn't mean those people or that ideology will go away. A mindset that used to be passed down from mother to daughter is now available on sites like FDS. If it gets deplatformed, it just means those women will fight even harder to reach even more women in person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 04:40 PM
3

Thank you for speaking up and doing what you're doing. It's not easy, but every time one of these creeps gets held accountable it makes things a tiny bit safer for women everywhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 01:04 PM
26

Ok, so here's a great example of why the "not all men" thing needs to go away. This was found on a popular sub and has 7800 upvotes at time of screenshot (maybe even more that were cancelled out by downvotes). That means that of everyone who looked at it, 7800 more people thought this was funny and upvoted than were appalled enough to downvote. Some even liked it so much they awarded it or commented. So, for the men who saw this post and did none of the things I described above: why not? Why sho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:56 PM
117

I suspect that a lot of the posts on that sub are made because their head knows what they need to do, but their heart is searching for a reason to stay. They're hoping to get that one response that basically says "omg hun my bf used to do that too! I said or did <catalyst here> and he totally did a 180!" and use it to believe their partner can change. When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:27 PM
18

It looks disheartening at times, but I try to remember that saying that it's always darkest before dawn. Society has experienced an immense amount of change in a relatively short time. Just 60 years ago it was expected that women would be SAHMs and give up their career to support their husbands. By the late 70s women were entering the workforce at a higher rate, but it was still common for unmarried mothers to be pressured into giving their kids up for adoption. I was a teen when the internet be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:18 PM
164

The joke's on him though, because she looks amazing. No doubt other guys' heads will turn...then he'll come running into the relationship subs whining about how his girlfriend left him for a guy she met while they were on a date. Like, what did you expect?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 11:55 AM
14

That tiny percentage of men that harass women must be busier than Santa Claus on Christmas Eve if they can harass 90% of the female population.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:56 AM
6

She'll be far better off on her own than with this albatross. Too much work to take care of a newborn and a man-toddler.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:51 AM
11

I'm sorry you're in this situation. The way he's treating you isn't fair - he's stringing you along and using the trauma you've survived to make you feel like you don't deserve him. He wants you to feel powerless, but there's a way you can take the power back: break things off with him. It won't be easy, but it will be far easier than spending a life with someone who will never truly have your back when things get tough. It's ok to still love him...it will take time, but just as you fell in love…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 02:05 PM
89

Yeah, that's not funny...that is seriously abusive. What was he gonna do if his friends took him up on the rates thing? Pimp her out? To say nothing of the fact that even if this relationship is salvageable, his friends are going to see her as "available" after that performance because he's given them the green light. Guaranteed one of them forces themselves on her at some point. I'm afraid for her safety.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 11:16 AM
36

Right?! "Omg how dare she call us out for our blatantly shitty behaviour! We'll never emotionally recover from this!" These guys wouldn't last 5 minutes as a woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 04:04 PM
92

So she's being sued for $15mil for posting their conversation, yet some apple tech posted a woman's sex tape and it was like less than half that? Smh. No male bias...nothing to see here /s.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 03:34 PM
27

I didn't think about the biracial aspect of it...I suspect you're right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 01:48 PM
174

Could he also be fishing for a date or bangmaid? Maybe what he wants is some pickme replying "omg I'm great with that! PM me for advice!" So he does...and makes sure to find out if she's single, no doubt spinning some kind of sob story. It sounds farfetched, but when nobody is answering your messages, what do you do?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 12:08 PM
193

Weird that he doesn't mention the girls' ages or if they've got long or short hair...both of those things would influence what I would recommend to him (eg. A waterfall braid on a 2-year-old?). Also interesting that he says mom doing their hair "isn't an option" for his daughters, but he doesn't really hint at why. I get that some people are private and don't want to discuss things, but on the surface it sounds weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 12:03 PM
17

Oh look...it's another devil's advocate. How original.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 11:43 AM
26

It's almost like sex is an Olympic sport or something. I've truly never understood the obsession with it, like why is it such a competitive thing to be the kinkiest, or have the most partners, or lose your virginity first? And guys will talk about that like they think they're getting me into bed with that nonsense...no way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 06:10 PM
64

Agreed...total turn-off. I'm a basic vanilla prude and proud of it lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 06:04 PM
135

I LOVE when people tell on themselves. This post is basically "here's why you shouldn't waste your time with me".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 05:54 PM
17

And if you try to say ANYTHING negative about porn anywhere on Reddit you get all these addicts freaking out and writing paragraphs about how you're wrong. All I see is an addict attacking someone who's getting between them and their addiction. Alcoholics and alcohol, cokeheads and coke, meatheads and meth, porn addicts and porn. Same thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 01:52 PM
17

I also love the giant red flag of "yeah it's not working out because my girlfriend doesn't put any effort in", yet it's his ass all over the dating sites. Wonder who he's gonna blame when his next relationship goes to crap. Spoiler alert: it's not him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 01:48 PM
48

Nobody is forcing men to go on dates. If you want to get to know someone, it's common to invite them to a meal or an event (platonically or otherwise). If you extended the invite, it's common decency to pay. If you don't want to get to know them, then don't extend the invite. If you don't want to date, don't. But the deal is, you don't get to be salty when women aren't asking you out. You don't get to complain when other men ask women out. She's under no obligation to choose you, and she probabl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 01:04 PM
8

Definitely. Even if you're shaky about his understanding of empathy, the last 2 are no-brainers. This would've been my life had I not extricated myself from a previous relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 10:33 PM
117

There's a lot to unpack in this story, but let's start with the obvious: Empathy, or lack of it. This guy can't grasp why the birth of their son is a private moment, the sadness at not having a deceased parent present for such a big life event, or the embarrassment at having one's emotional distress played for a laugh with friends. But he's upset that he was embarrassed in front of his friends. Calling mother to vent. It's emotionally immature to have your parents mediate disputes in your marria…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 07:27 PM
3

This can also be an indication that he's got someone at home and you're the side piece. About a decade ago I was casually dating someone, but something was nagging at me and I couldn't put my finger on what was bothering me. Then I looked at what contact info he had for me: he had my cell and home numbers and my personal email. For him? I had his work number and personal email. He only ever wanted to meet on weekdays. We both liked hockey, so to see what was up I suggested going to see a game th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 01:06 PM
3

They make the same mistake as the person who cheats on a test and makes sure they get 100% exactly. Screw up a couple questions to make it believable!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 12:41 PM
4

Funny that you never see stuff like this the other way round, where it's the woman with all the baggage. Huh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 12:37 PM
18

I agree with your point about the community...I find that this sort of thing happens with communities in general. You have people who are on the fringe or drift in and out of it who generally have a healthy perspective on things. Then there are the people who get really into things, to the point where it can be all-consuming. It's like they become more and more extreme to outdo everyone else. Those people can poison a community with their own prejudices and distort the values of the group into s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 04:25 PM
38

Agreed...it's a total scam. I've never seen it work for anyone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 03:49 PM
60

His side of the story is just too perfect...there's no way it's 100% truthful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 03:42 PM
46

"You seem expensive"? I think I'll take that as a compliment. Yes, I am expensive because I know who I am and what I have to offer. If you're not interested, don't go away mad...just go away. These same guys wouldn't accept a job for less pay than they know they're worth, so I don't understand what the disconnect is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 03:35 PM
162

If it were true polyamory where all parties love and are committed to each other equally and use protection, that would be one thing. Problem is, it's usually women being pressured or guilted into it, which is a recipe for disaster from the start. It's okay to want monogamy. It's okay to want a partner who can be faithful. It's okay to walk away from a situation that makes you feel uncomfortable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 03:11 PM
7

Actually some of my ancestors are from Bradford (I'm in Canada), so if he'd like to spend a few days helping me pore over parish records and historical archives, then he's got himself a deal! Seriously though, "best Chinaman impression"? He sounds like a boor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 11:49 AM
8

Yeah, those requests sound pretty standard. It usually boils down to wanting someone who can match you and shares your values. If education is important to you and you have a bachelor's/master's/PhD, it's understandable to want someone with a similar education level. Some people are happy doing the same job for a decade - if that's not you, then you're probably going to find it difficult if your partner likes that idea. One of my biggest irritations is people who hold others to higher standards …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 04:55 PM
42

In general, I think OLD is a bad idea. The whole industry is made for men, by men, to make men's lives easier. It reminds me about a comment someone made about Facebook: that if you're not the buyer or the seller in a transaction, then you're the product being sold. In the case of OLD, the vast majority of members who upgrade to premium service (and generate revenue) are men, so in order to keep the revenue coming in, dating apps will prioritize mens' wants over women's needs to security and pri…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 12:03 PM
8

They're just brainwashed...it's like the employee at work who works loads of unpaid overtime and will defend their crappy bosses to the death to anyone who will listen. They think that by doing that, they're keeping their job safe. No way would an employer lay off such a loyal employee, right? Problem is, if the business needs to lay people off, the employer isn't going to care...they'll lay off whoever they need to, because that bootlicker is still an employee costing them money to keep. It's t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 11:22 AM
27

They're out there...one of the guys I used to work with had 5 kids with 4 different women and complained about how much child support he had to pay. He then proceeded to ask me out. Lol nope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 07:29 PM
2

Thanks...I knew it had a name but couldn't remember it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 08:45 PM
7

I don't even read stuff like this anymore...the person asking isn't asking the question in good faith. It's a form of propaganda where someone asks a seemingly innocent question, but what they're actually doing is providing a specific outlet for misogynists to list their talking points about why women are the root of all evil. The idea is to get people (probably women) to call them out, so that they can say "See? That's what I'm talking about! They attack us for no reason!" The point isn't to co…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 01:58 PM
6

Lmao! I guess he forgot about the c-word then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 03:53 PM
21

If sex work is so empowering and it's easy money like men say, then why aren't there more rentboys? Why don't broke guys just start up an OnlyFans or become a rentboy? I mean, taking a dick is easy money, right? So why aren't they doing it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:43 PM
84

And if you're childfree, there's also the added bonus of sticking it to the super-rich as well. They need a growing population to continue to build wealth. If the general population declines significantly, they don't have as much power - this is part of what happened in the 14th century when the plague decimated the population of Europe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 06:32 PM
1

Try to go back to the day you found out he was cheating on you in your mind. Remember how you felt when you found out. Remember the hurt, the feelings of betrayal, the anger...all of it. And then block him on everything and delete him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 06:09 PM
4

The problem with the argument that schools are set up to favour women is that schooling as a concept hasn't changed a lot since the early 20th century. The length or basic structure of a school day or year is similar to what it was 120 years ago. Until the last 40-50 years, men received the majority of acceptances to universities and professional schools, and held the majority of jobs requiring a post-secondary education. So if schools have been reasonably the same for the last 100 years, and fo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 04:29 PM
6

Agreed...stories like this are painful to read. I was single for the majority of my 20s, and at the time I wasn't happy about it because I wanted a relationship. But giving my 20s away to someone like this would've been far worse. It doesn't take that long to know whether or not you want to marry someone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 03:22 PM
6

This is a great example of the Sunk Cost Fallacy in action. Not getting married is no big deal to him, but a major dealbreaker for her, but she's afraid to walk away because she's already invested 11 years into this relationship. Walking away means starting all over again with someone else, and even then there's no guarantee. 11 years isn't rushing into anything...even Congress works faster than that. If he knows marriage is important to her and he's still not proposing, then she's being strung …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 03:16 PM
9

For my own mental health I decided I'm finished with mainstream Reddit. I check the subs I subscribe to, but I don't go to the popular posts anymore. It feels like the majority of Reddit is either incels or porn-addicted abusive men, and it's exhausting to take verbal abuse for daring to have an opinion that your own wellbeing should take precedence over their wants. All the major subs are just echo chambers for the same old chant: porn good, women bad, not all men, sex work is work, shame on wo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 02:48 PM
56

See, this was always what scared me away from serious relationships with men: I don't want to be "tolerated" or "put up with", I want an equal partner who loves me. I want someone who knows that the sooner WE get the housework done on Saturday morning, the sooner WE can go out, and someone who I can travel with and have it be an adventure, not one person dragging the other around. I never found it, and once I hit my 40s I stopped looking. I'm fine on my own and not interested in helping raise so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 01:47 PM
13

His girlfriend is dating the wrong brother.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 01:16 PM
38

The 1 in 6 stat is disturbing, and I wish more men spent less time trying to debunk it by invalidating women's experiences or creating straw man arguments, and more time thinking about that stat. Male lurkers: think of the 6 closest women you know. Your wife/girlfriend. Your sister. Your mother. Your aunt. Your cousin. Your grandmother. The statistics say that one of them has been a victim of rape or attempted rape. They aren't nameless, faceless women...they're people you know. Are you prepared…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:17 PM
39

I think for narcissists, stuff like this is based on the sunk cost fallacy - meeting family is a step further into the relationship and by pulling you in deeper, they can make it harder to get away, especially if their family gets close to you too. The justno subs use the term "flying monkeys" - it describes someone who isn't the main abuser, but can still get to the victim and perpetrate abuse even when the victim has blocked the main abuser. So if his behaviour becomes dangerous and you break …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 09:10 PM
12

That's rich...I doubt this dude's ever listened to a woman in his life. Also...what's this bitter loneliness he speaks of? He's contradicting himself: he says loneliness is bitter, but also says if he wanted to attract women he'd listen to them. So is he lonely or is he attracting women?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 08:46 PM
11

Feminist? They think we're a full-blown hate group! Cause ya know, anything that excludes men is obviously in league with Al Qaeda. I've been called a terrorist because apparently, wanting better for the next generation of women is a crime against humanity. I wish this was a hyperbole, but unfortunately it's not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 02:14 PM
6

How about they elevate themselves? That's what women had to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 07:57 PM
146

Agreed. Any man that's into stuff like this (threesomes included, even one time) gets an automatic dump and block from me, no questions asked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 07:56 PM
24

This is a great example of the trash taking itself out...this guy did you a MASSIVE favour! Nobody's perfect, but this guy sounds like a complete dumpster fire. Don't let the fear of being alone drag you into a relationship like this one - this guy's a total liability and you're far better off on your own than being saddled with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:22 PM
3

Maybe make graduation rates would be higher if they spent less time on PornHub and more time studying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 01:08 PM
9

Lol it's happened to me too. I committed the heinous crime of having an opinion while female. Whoops.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 12:10 PM
17

This reminds me of that tweet that does the rounds every so often for karma, but needs to be updated... "Let's normalize not sending women long paragraphs after you've broken up. " I just want her to know how much she hurt me" Baby boy, she knows. She knows and she doesn't care."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 07:15 PM
4

Awwww. That's a lot of words to say "I want attention".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 06:53 PM
18

He's lazy...he doesn't want to go to the effort of finding someone new, because that means putting himself out there. He knows she went out with him once, so he figures he can make it happen again. Kinda like buying a sweater you like but aren't sure where you'd wear it, so you buy it and it sits in the closet for a bit. One day you're browsing the stuff in your closet and notice it there, so you decide to put it on. They go out with someone, don't feel a spark, but don't throw the number away b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 06:48 PM
41

This is just to remind her that he still exists and he still considers her an option. He's hoping for a response saying she's given up travelling and is ready to settle down, which will make him think he's in with a chance. This is a subtle form of negging - she's supposed to reply back correcting him. Best thing is to just block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 04:11 PM
8

I'm glad you've used a work analogy, because this kind of behaviour happens with coworkers too. I've had male coworkers use the same tricks to try to get me to do part of their job for them. They'll pretend they don't know something they've been told or shown multiple times, or not act on something thinking I'll chase them. As someone who spent years in customer service, I've had to work to not feel like a bitch or like I'm not doing my job by catering to them. Worst part is, my male coworker wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 01:50 PM
17

Another reason this is bad advice: according to some family law websites, in exceptional cases the new spouse's income can be taken into account when settling child support cases. So if this guy is seriously in arrears, a judge might take into account his new spouse's income in determining garnishment of wages or hardship to the kids. Meaning, either you're now paying for another women's kids or you're both living on your income because all of his is going to payment of back child support.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 01:19 PM
23

Agreed. I've seen so many people with combined finances have this kind of trouble. The thing is, this kind of debt is life-changing in a back-out-of-a-marriage kind of way. Of course he hid it - he knew she wouldn't have married him if she knew! This guy is right that she shouldn't sit on this...she needs to file for divorce ASAP. CoMmUnIcAte is NOT the thing to do here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 01:10 PM
1

Would something like this be grounds for annulment? That's some SERIOUS debt! The trick would be proving it was kept from her. The correct answer here is RUN! This will have a devastating impact on her own finances and financial future...she may lose her retirement options because of it. This is another good reason to not date people with children from previous relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 01:03 PM
58

The problem with being a "good guy" or "good person" is that it means living your values, and that's not always easy to do. It's telling the cashier you got too much change back, even though you're starving. It's owning up to a mistake at work, even though it could cost you your job. It's confronting a long-time friend about something awful they did and being prepared to speak the truth, even though it might cost you the friendship. People with that strength of character don't tend to wear it as…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 04:43 PM
57

Did he really think he was going to her for a romantic interlude and deep emotional connection? That's kinda deluded, isn't it? If you want to be seen as more than an object that hands over money, then start viewing a relationship as a connection instead of a transaction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 04:24 PM
111

"What should I do?" Well, not move in with him, for a start. He's giving her a preview of what life will be like living with him...does she really want to live in that horror movie?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 04:00 PM
102

Men will shame anything. It isn't about actually not liking women's bodies - it's about control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 01:34 PM
52

This should be an automatic expulsion, no questions asked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 12:58 AM
11

I agree with you about Harry and I'm so glad someone else said it first. I read that interview (I prefer to read transcripts instead of watch so I can digest it and pick up on things said), and I suspect the relationship is abusive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/21 01:28 PM
6

Sometimes ghosting is just what needs to happen. If someone is after you to provide a reason not to date them, it's a trap. It isn't about "so I know what mistake I'm making", it's to talk you into whatever it is they want. Anyone who has taken a sales seminar has been taught how to take customer's objections and turn them around into reasons to say yes...well, it's the same principle here. As soon as I get an excuse out of you, I can now talk you around using that excuse, which forces you to gi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 03:10 PM
5

Wow...wtf? I mean, on one hand, free money is always great. On the other, it's like he thinks he owns you. Personally, my enormous Leo pride would kick in and there's no way I'd accept it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 03:16 PM
48

I'm sorry this is happening to you...it really sucks to find out that he wasn't being realistic about what he wanted to do or could do. This is reminding me of a chapter in the book "He's Just Not That Into You": he's just not that into you if he's trying to break up with you. Remember, if it's not an enthusiastic yes, it's a no, and you deserve better than to be a backup option or someone's part-time girlfriend. Please don't waste any more emotional or mental energy on this guy...he's not unsur…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 02:30 PM
39

I struggle with my weight as well. I've been heavier than I'd like and I've been thin (whatever that means). The SECOND a guy says anything negative about your weight, drop him like a bad habit! No good comes out of dating him, and you'll never get to a point where he'll stop making comments. As for your bullet points above, they're examples of (in order) negging, negging, narcissistic negging, mansplaining, and controlling behaviour. If I wanted a personal trainer, I'd go to the gym...not a dat…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 07:32 PM
47

FDS put a label to things I'd thought were wrong or upset me and I couldn't explain why, like gaslighting, future faking, love-bombing, or being someone's forever girlfriend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 07:17 PM
95

It isn't FDS brainwashing us into being alone...the general quality of men is doing that. I was over 40 when I found FDS and I can promise you that men did the VAST majority of convincing me I was better on my own just by being themselves 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 06:56 PM
82

Lol I especially like the comment that "gender relations are falling apart and have been for some time now". Ok, so...what are you doing about that, Mr. Man? How are you going to be part of the solution?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 06:37 PM
6

Yeah it's sad...it's like there's no social accountability anymore. Even if someone's afraid of confrontation (like me) there are so many ways to report someone anonymously, or do it in a way that isn't in their face. As long as they're not like that, they don't care if someone they know is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 07:08 PM
10

Definitely...and missing an opportunity means it's a learning opportunity. I'm still discovering biases I didn't even know I had.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 04:41 PM
55

The linked article reminds me of the Nicola Thompson interview on Good Morning Britain (I think) where she said all men have missed an opportunity to call out misogyny or harrassment against women. The male host was triggered and basically started his "NoT aLl MeN" spiel. He totally missed the point though, because he had a preconceived idea in his head about what that looks like. How many times has he heard a story from a friend that sounded questionable and though "yeah but my friend is harmle…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 03:59 PM
13

I'm half wondering if he isn't trolling her, like in the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, where Kate Hudson's character does everything she can to try to turn a guy off? I wonder if this guy's got a bet with someone...or maybe that's just me trying to convince myself that men really aren't this bad and clueless about this behaviour 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 03:06 PM
59

I'm glad she did, because communication just isn't enough here. This guy isn't frugal...he's cheap to the point of being dangerous. Frugal people will spend money on things that are important to them...and she isn't. He just doesn't give a crap and wants to see how far he can take it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 02:59 PM
27

We have some of these radio shows here, and I want to highlight this because I think it's a real problem. Basically, they talk about ghosting and get people who have been ghosted to call in so they can tell their story. The radio station then calls the person who ghosted them to find out the reason. I have a major problem with shows like this for a couple reasons: If I ghosted you, there was a good reason why. If someone ghosted me, why would I dwell on it? Just pick yourself up and move on...co…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 12:55 PM
3

Omg loops x.x I don't think I had a single one I made work on the first try lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 08:56 PM
18

Nice! I'm still mastering "Hello World" lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 04:06 PM
32

From what I'm seeing, you can create a bot...I have zero Python knowledge, but it looks like you just get it to watch r / all / new, and it will watch for a certain phrase and can either PM you or generate a post with the info. I guess you create an account for the bot, and if you can create a sub to put the posts in that's the best way? Not sure how hard any of that is to do lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 04:04 PM
39

Thanks...I'll need it lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 02:18 PM
92

I'm going to work on it...time to learn a new skill
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 02:05 PM
38

If only I knew how...I took one class in Java programming and wouldn't even know where to start. Time to Google I guess :-)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 02:04 PM
309

If I had the programming skills, I'd love to make a not-all-men-bot that tracks the number of times this is said on reddit in a day and posts the not-all-men comment count per subreddit per day in one place. Kinda like how the haiku bot or wiki bot operates. Maybe once people see it in stats and can track it like COVID counts, it would draw attention to it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 01:52 PM
31

This guy scares the crap outta me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 12:28 PM
17

The counter-argument made was that my colleagues didn't have the same "attention to detail". Considering that we were in building materials, which depends on precise measurements...yikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 07:52 PM
38

I got this at WORK of all places. I was one of 6 people in customer service (5 guys and me). We were responsible for covering the cashier's lunch break. Guess who got picked to do that? I was told it "needed a woman's touch". How do you even fight against something like that? This is what a lot of people don't understand about discrimination (gender, race, anything) - the people doing it know how to be underhanded. Reporting something like this is so much harder than a slur or offensive comment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 05:14 PM
26

Yeah...any time a guy says his female partner regularly orgasms I'm like "no, you mean she regularly fakes it because she's sick of you asking every 5 minutes". Just reading what he wrote indicates he knows nothing. He needs to actually ask her what she wants.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 05:03 PM
2

Lol this guy is about as convincing as the guy who told me he didn't call/text because his phone fell off a roof. He came into my work, so I couldn't blank him. My response was "OMG, don't you just HATE when that happens?" Lmao gtf outta here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 04:52 PM
52

Yup. I almost wouldn't even be surprised if once things got dire enough, rape was decriminalized. It's already got such a low conviction rate and with porn so abundant, we've desensitized at least 2 generations to it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 07:01 PM
266

As long as the 1% has the 99% to exploit for labour and resources, it will. If the population of the 99% starts to shrink significantly though, it causes a problem for the 1%. I think the low birth rates in western countries are an unintended byproduct of the push to get more women into the workforce in the 70s & 80s to help drive down wages and the value of labour. Problem is, nobody accounted for the fact that if women could have their own bank accounts, housing, and jobs, then they'd no longe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 03:35 PM
11

I read somewhere that when you've been given preferential treatment all your life, equality feels like oppression. That's probably why they can't see the difference between a space designed to groom murderers and domestic terrorists and a safe space for women to express themselves without men policing their language.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:48 PM
55

Is there a way to flag this as bad sex advice for men? Yikes! I promise I don't care about my reputation, I'm just not into being degraded.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:23 PM
44

This guy sounds about as "impressive" as one of my exes, who constantly hounded me to sneak into a movie with him. How old are you, 10? Like, that's not going to impress me...I don't like people who try to get me into trouble. The only thing you're showing with that is that at age 35 you have zero awareness of the consequences of your actions. Not a good look.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 02:04 PM
13

Chiming in to say I'm ace and don't fit any of those 3 categories 😀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 01:44 PM
48

Wonder if you can get a receipt for a charitable donation if you Venmo him the cash...cause any guy that broke could probably be considered a charity. Smh 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 01:25 PM
3

I think it's because the phrase "we need to talk" means "I'm about to say something that doesn't fit with your worldview". Especially with these last 4 years of Trump and particularly with older generations of men, this seems to be the norm. They'll say "I'm tired of hearing about it!". What they mean is, they don't abuse women, but they don't want to hear about women who are abused. They're not racist, but they don't want to hear about BLM. They're not homophobic, but they don't want to see 2 m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 04:17 PM
3

I admire your ability to get through the evening with him...I think I probably would have chucked him out at some point. What attracted her to this loser? Does she seriously think she can't do any better than this classless boor? She really does need to run from this guy, because he sounds like a budding serial killer. If she stays with him, she might as well get "sorry, he's not normally like this" tattooed on her forehead, because it will be her catchphrase everytime he shows her up in public.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:37 PM
17

Agreed. I'll sum it up in 2 words: just don't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:16 PM
39

He's looking for a permanent side chick...the "no free time" thing is the setup for when he leaves you on read all day or drops off the radar. The "co-parent with my partner" is to make you believe he and his wife have an arrangement...I promise you she doesn't know. The kid is definitely no older than a toddler. This whole profile is one giant red flag. The only thing I'll give him points for is even mentioning that he has a kid, because most wouldn't even do that. Although, I expect that she's…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 02:04 PM
200

Uhm, dude? Men as a group have NEVER helped women or children...not unless there was something in it for them, anyway. I suspect what he means is "men used to pretend to be altruistic in order for the opportunity to use or victimise women and children. Well, now we're dropping the pretense!" Ok, fine...you weren't fooling anyone anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 05:11 PM
5

Remember that it's ok to let someone treat you to something...because you're worth it. I also struggled with accepting gifts or help from others, mainly because I wasn't used to it. After hearing "if I didn't want to, I wouldn't have offered" a couple times, it started to sink in. Besides, there are other ways of reciprocating without jumping into bed. That said, what are you looking for? Are you after a relationship, and with a guy like this? Or do you just want to casually date for awhile? It …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:57 PM
7

I've always figured it's basically the same reason the schoolyard bully behaves the way they do. Low self-esteem seems to be an epidemic in society these days: social media pours fuel on the fire, and so much of the media is focused on exposing people and bringing people down. That's not necessarily a bad thing, because people doing wrong need to answer for it, but we're not good at providing context or accurate information anymore. People aren't learning how to process their emotions properly o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:28 PM
3

Oh yeah...a real candidate for Father of the Year.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:35 PM
29

I saw a lot of this in my 20s and 30s too...I used to wonder if I wasn't an old fossil for refusing to even think about having a child without marrying someone first. I suspect a lot of them figure that the baby will change their partner's mind or speed up the maturity process and get them to propose. Big mistake - it won't. Funnily enough, a friend of mine did this and wanted to marry, but he didn't. After the baby was born, he really wanted to get married but she no longer wanted to. She was w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 03:29 AM
3

This needs to be taught in schools...I truly believe that a large portion of rapes that aren't reported are because of encounters like this where the victim only realized it was rape much later, after it was too late to collect evidence. They felt shaken and uncomfortable after it happened, but weren't comfortable with the word "rape", even though that's exactly what took place. Our laws are based on the idea that rapists are people who corner their victims in dark alleyways, even though that's …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 05:39 PM
7

I don't really look at that, because the reality of the job market is that unless you're in STEM or a doctor/lawyer, the majority of people are going to end up working a job that doesn't need a degree even though they have one. That said, you'll find people on both ends of the ambition spectrum...ones that are comfortable in a job they're overqualified for but aren't interested in looking for something more challenging, and ones that are always looking for the next opportunity and are fine with …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 03:58 PM
5

Good luck!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 06:09 PM
2

Not sure about divorce records, but one place you can check is canlii.org - it has case records from a bunch of different courts. Always worth throwing a name into it to see what you find.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 05:34 PM
4

Ok this kinda bothers me...I don't like that his mom "checked in" with you. That seems weird, but maybe it's just me. I dated a guy with a mom like that, and I think Princess Diana expressed my feelings the best: "there were three of us in this marriage...so it was a bit crowded."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 04:51 PM
37

Eek...I'm going to go ahead and call this guy a predator. He knew you for 3 years, and pounced once he knew you were no longer in a relationship. He's using his "depression" to seem weaker and harmless, but he's manipulative: he knows that you prefer humour and probably struggle with confrontation (so do I, and it's something I'm working on). This text is intended to intimidate you by making you uncomfortable and forcing you to be the asshole who turns him down. He knows that. I'm not sure where…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 09:34 PM
6

Not the OP, but I've bought stuff like that from a company called Born Pretty. It's fairly inexpensive, which is good if you're a beginner at doing your nails yourself. I'd also recommend a peel-off base coat...that way if you mess up, you just peel it off and do it over.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 02:24 PM
43

Ok, so Cosmo is trying to say that just because someone has a cannibalism fetish doesn't mean that they would actually do it or try it for real. So, could they also explain why a lot of men with rape fetishes go on to rape women? What's the difference? Trying to normalize all of this violent behaviour is a form of grooming and needs to be treated as such.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 02:12 PM
10

I guess what's at the core of this behaviour is poor impulse control and FOMO (fear of missing out). Money is probably the number one cause of divorce or breakups, so it's really important that both parties have similar attitudes to money. I've ended relationships over money...I'm pretty frugal and a bit of a squirrel, so impulse purchases aren't my thing. I research before buying anything like a phone, laptop or car to make sure I know what my money is worth and can recognize a good deal when I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 04:14 PM
15

I especially liked the guy saying everyone should just be nice to each other. Like IDK man, why do you think this sub exists? Maybe if men actually practiced what they preached then maybe half the population wouldn't need to vent about how crap the other half is. That sounds like some selfawarewolves material.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 02:45 PM
22

I've only got one word for this guy: therapy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 02:35 PM
22

Men just completely lack empathy...I don't think there's any other explanation for it. It just seems to be a fundamental inability to see anyone else's point of view and I don't know how that's fixable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 01:53 PM
6

After reading that, I think a law like this is a really bad idea. It seems like yet another way for a misogynistic society to victimize women using other women, while diverting responsibility from men. I haven't looked into it, but I'd bet a lot of money that in the last 50 years this law has been primarily used by women against their husband's mistress(es). How would you even prove the 3rd party deliberately and maliciously worked specifically to break up the marriage? The only examples I can t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 09:24 PM
48

Yeah, these guys sound like losers. I'm ashamed to admit that in my late teens and early 20s I read that magazine religiously. Women as a whole will be much better off once we stop caring and prioritizing what men think. Maybe it's optimistic, but I do think we're getting to a tipping point...it feels like more women are realizing that they're better off just fending for themselves with even a mediocre job, instead of dating a guy and having a mediocre job + baggage. You get to a point where you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 07:44 PM
6

You're completely right - she should just unmatch because this guy is bad news. He's only just started talking to her and is meant to be impressing her, but he's already refusing to listen to her side of the story in order to give some unknown-to-him guy the benefit of the doubt. His attitude sucks and it's only going to get worse. He's misogynistic. Block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 03:50 PM
12

This is my thing too...I'm 41 and never been married. Zero plans to get married or live with someone. I've lived on my own for about 20 years and I really don't think I could at this point...I value my own space too much. It's great to know that if I get sick of winter, I can just take a week of vacation and run off to the Caribbean without having to arrange it with a ton of people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 03:49 PM
47

There's gotta be some degree of narcissism involved with men who think like this. I can't believe he kept the lie going that long...most people would've slipped at some point. My case was always the opposite...I didn't want kids and I dated men who concealed kids from me. "Oh, I figured by the time you found out about them you'd be so in love with me it wouldn't matter!" Yeah, nope. I don't do baggage. "But all women want kids!" Well, this one doesn't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 07:47 PM
9

Don't feel bad about telling your mother...finding out the truth hurts, but you know what hurts more? Finally finding out the truth on your own only to realize that so many other people knew and could've told you, but didn't. Unfortunately, I'm not South Asian and can't help you on how to handle the divorce issue, but what I can suggest is maybe approaching this from a finance point of view. Could you start the conversation with your dad as saying you got a call from the bank about a suspicious …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 04:19 PM
102

Stuff like this really drives me crazy, and when I dated I saw it on dating sites all the time. I will never understand why people lie about having children or their desire to have or not have children. He lied to her for FOUR YEARS. He dated her knowing she wanted to adopt, he proposed to her knowing she wanted to adopt, and proceeded to marry her knowing she wanted to adopt. Did he really think that when he told her he didn't want to that she was just going to accept it because she would love …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 03:58 PM
2

Y'know, if I had a dime for every man who was "tricked into" having kids, I'd be retired on a yacht in the Mediterranean by now. Love the bonus backhanded "yeah, she's really immature and is your age." Nice!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 04:17 PM
4

I've worked retail and had this kind of response from management. What I found that worked was explaining how this could affect them if they kept giving out people's information. They wouldn't listen to "it's not safe, you have no way of knowing what their intentions are." They started to listen when it became "if something happens to someone, you could potentially be held liable for giving out personal info."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 02:56 PM
45

I'm 41...I think it's pretty accurate. I personally didn't really actively give up on dating, but more just got so busy doing things I enjoy that I don't really have time for it even if I did want a relationship. I realized after a long-term relationship fell apart that I felt I'd missed out on things that I didn't have time to do because I wasn't single, and that relationships didn't seem to be adding much to my life - I don't have a strong maternal instinct or desire to look after someone else…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 10:44 PM
2

I've lurked in this sub for months, but I had to make an account to comment on this. As far as I'm concerned, this is rape. I don't care that it was a threesome situation...you were coerced into doing something you would not normally have consented to, and your ex knew that. "Either join in or I'm cheating on you" isn't free will. Do NOT blame yourself - you are not at fault. He is at fault, as is his friend for continuing to participate when it was obvious that consent wasn't being given freely…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 08:25 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter