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LettingHimLead Archive

View 2 posts and 140 comments by LettingHimLead on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
39

LTR/MARRIAGELettingHimLead/r/RedPillWomen08/08/19 11:21 PM
1

LettingHimLead/r/RedPillWomen17/02/19 02:17 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

Been married 24 years and together for 27, so the impact would be huge. Of course there are the logical impacts - financial, logistics, but he’s been my best friend and partner since we were kids. I’ve been with him for longer than I’ve been without him. I don’t know what a world without him would even look like. I would not remarry (or even date). My circle is large with family and friends, and I have no desire to start up a romantic relationship with someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:41 PM
3

Been married 24 years and together for 27, so the impact would be huge. Of course there are the logical impacts - financial, logistics, but he’s been my best friend and partner since we were kids. I’ve been with him for longer than I’ve been without him. I don’t know what a world without him would even look like. I would not remarry (or even date). My circle is large with family and friends, and I have no desire to start up a romantic relationship with someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:04 PM
6

Agreed. And I would throw in strong accountability. A man who blames others for his mistakes is gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 02:19 PM
–

Huh?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 11:43 PM
1

I’m a woman whose husband got better after discovering the manosphere. I introduced him to it. He was a good man always, honestly. Maybe lazier than I would have liked. Now? He outperforms me in every way. Laundry? Dishes? Yard work? Home maintenance? Finances? Kids? Job growth? He owns all of it now. I still work, though he’s made it clear that I can quit anytime I want. The manosphere grew my husband, who was married to me at 18, into a man. I honestly don’t understand the hate.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 02:52 AM
1

It’s all pretty recent. I, too, am interested to see how it all plays out. You can almost guarantee there will be lawsuits.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/24 12:43 AM
2

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/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/24 11:56 PM
2

I know for a fact that TX law allows a woman to terminate pregnancy if the mother’s life is at risk. The fact that the doctor turned her away would be nothing short of malpractice.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/24 11:51 PM
2

It’s malpractice to deny life-saving care that has been lawful in this country for several decades under the guise of “Oh, I didn’t know I could do that.” It’s their job to know what they legally can and cannot do.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/24 06:57 PM
5

Malpractice.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/24 06:05 PM
1

Abortion to save the life of the mother is legal in every state in America.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/24 04:41 PM
7

My husband was adamant that we have children, so yes. He’s also very involved in parenting, and would never accept anything less than 50/50 custody if we were to ever divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 07:47 PM
1

Mine has a thing for shorts worn with tennis shoes - not flip flops or sandals.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/24 11:39 AM
1

It’s mostly when a married couple come to an impasse on a particular decision. Who makes the final decision? In our home, it would be my husband, since that’s the dynamic we’ve chosen. We agree on 99% of things, so it rarely comes into play. But when we don’t, he decides and then has to own/take total responsibility for that decision. He also makes lots of fun plans for us, cleans, washes and gases up the cars, fixes all the things that break, keeps the yard in pristine condition - women act lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/24 01:31 PM
–

My son is 6’1” at age 13. His hope is to marry a tall woman and churn out NBA babies.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/23 09:17 PM
0

I’m conservative, too (hence my username). I earn more than my husband by about 30%. He still makes good money, and he knows he could advance his career, but it would be at the expense of his time with the family. We decided there comes a point when we have enough money, but we will never reach a point where we have enough time. I just don’t think it’s so black and white.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/22 02:03 AM
3

Are you 24 now? I wouldn’t be in a rush. Find things that excite you. Find out how to be comfortable in your skin. Confidence and independence are sexy. You’ve got plenty of time. I may have been a young pup when I paired up, but I certainly wasn’t looking for a husband. I wasn’t even really all that interested in dating yet. I was just having fun with my friends. We were set up by my best friend and her boyfriend (who is my husband’s brother). Coincidentally, they were married around the same t…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/21 03:13 AM
1

Thank you. That’s very kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/21 02:59 AM
5

It’s a double edged sword!! I was my daughters age when I met my husband, and I can NOT imagine her being in her forever relationship right now. There are benefits created by it and there are hardships created by it. I don’t recommend it, but I don’t NOT recommend it, either. 😂
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/21 02:57 AM
2

I work full time from home. My kids are big - 16 and 12. I manage to run laundry during my work day. Also unload the dishwasher from the night before. I get off at 5:00 and usually start dinner between 5:30 and 6:00. We will eat anywhere between 6:30-7:30. Then I load the dishwasher, wash the pots and pans, and clean the counters. I have a Roomba that vacuums daily (2 shedding dogs). I usually meal plan on Saturday and set a grocery delivery for Sunday. Husband and kids all have access to the gr…
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/21 02:41 AM
7

Every great now and then!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/21 02:11 AM
7

Only when it comes up!! And we were young. Naive. Stupid. All of those adjectives people call teenagers who are pledging their WHOLE life to someone else. For sure, we had a lot of dumb luck. We were very fortunate to grow in the same directions, and while we’ve both changed over the decades, our goals and priorities never wavered. I’m glad we didn’t listen to the people who told us we needed to sow our wild oats before settling down.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/21 02:11 AM
22

F, 39, 18, had been dating for a year and a half and I’ve been married to him since I was 20.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/21 01:36 AM
13

F - 1. My husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/21 11:16 PM
1

I think this is true. Women can’t raise men. And honestly, women shouldn’t raise women alone, either. Fathers are incredibly important in raising well-adjusted adults, but I imagine it would be harder for a boy to not have a dad. Some are lucky enough to have another male role-model in their lives to watch, but many aren’t. And it’s creating men who don’t know how to be men.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/21 08:47 PM
2

The way he looked in his baseball uniform. Bubble butt. Pretty lips. Nice teeth. Thick eyebrows. Broad shoulders.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/21 07:59 PM
1

Started dating my (now) husband 22 years ago this October when I was 17. Married 19 years. When ya know, ya know.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/21 11:02 PM
1

What are you talking about? The age gap between these two people? She’s a consenting adult - the age gap between her and her partner is none of my business.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/21 11:25 AM
3

As the mother of a son, I just want to know he’s marrying someone who will be supportive of his goals, supportive of his relationships with his friends and family, and who respects him as a good man. That’s it.
/r/RedPillWomen08/08/21 01:31 AM
6

I have always worked. But I’d have loved to be home. The reason? I like my kids and like being here to do things for them.
/r/RedPillWomen26/07/21 02:37 AM
3

No for me. But only because I think I would perpetually feel like an interloper in an existing family. I’ve never been divorced. We have two children. I know I’m tied to my husband forever because of the kids - not just in continuing to see him at holidays, ball games, graduations, etc, but actually being tied together forever because of our kids. I do want to say - I have NO problems with step parents. I have a stepfather I adore. One of my best friends is a wonderful stepmother and has a great…
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/21 12:27 AM
7

Same. I’ve only ever been with my husband. And I only get aroused by my husband. My fantasies are about my husband. I can see an attractive guy and think he’s attractive, but my libido seems to only respond to my husband. I just always thought this was the difference in men and women. I know my husband is different than me in this department.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/21 12:08 AM
4

I read the updated post, but I was replying specifically to the comment that you’re more “swift” than him. Look, you’re not married. If you’re not into him as a prospective lifelong mate, then cut him loose. But don’t cut him loose for not being “alpha” enough - I’m not even sure what that means to you.
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/21 03:49 PM
6

You may be more “swift” than him, but I’ll guarantee there are things he’s better at than you. I can out-argue my husband even if I’m wrong (which is a flaw for sure, but has definitely helped me career-wise). My husband isn’t great at verbalizing his thoughts or emotions. Check for me. But the man builds beautiful furniture from nothing. He can rewire a house, run a new water line, and grill the best steak I’ve ever had. He gets his checks, too. You’re not competing with your spouse to figure o…
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/21 03:15 PM
3

My husband will sometimes do this, too. I just counter back with the things I dealt with at work in my day. And I blather on about boring stuff like he does. And it finally clicked. He said “Do you find my work stories as boring as I find your work stories?” And I said “I definitely do.” Now he only comes to me when something is at least marginally interesting.
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/21 03:43 PM
3

I outearn my husband. The fact is, I don’t need him. And he doesn’t need me. We’re both perfectly capable of managing our lives and being happy without the other. But I want him. And I choose. Just as he wants and chooses me. He shouldn’t desire me to stay with him because of “need”. We should both work to add value to one another’s lives so that we want to keep one another around.
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/21 11:51 AM
2

Yes. Been together now since 1999. I wasn’t looking for a relationship. I just enjoyed spending time with my friends. We were friends for about a year before he asked me out. My best friend was dating his older brother. 39 Female
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/21 01:57 PM
9

I had a boyfriend in high school who cried a lot. Any time we disagreed. That was a turn off. Been married now for 19 years, so of course I’ve seen my husband cry. Loss of family. A pet that passed. Anxiety over fear of losing a child. A movie. I’ve never once been turned off. I’m not a crier myself, so he’s likely not seen me cry any more than I’ve seen him cry. I like strong men. Strong men cry sometimes. But not all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/21 01:48 AM
3

The question asked doesn’t matter. What matters is how YOU feel about it. I can tell you I’ve only been with my husband, which is true, but we’ve been together since high school. He was with me a year and a half before we had sex. If he died tomorrow and I found myself dating again? It would again be a long courtship before I had sex with him. It’s just my nature. I don’t take it lightly, and I never will just to follow the norm or be taken seriously by men. If they don’t take my values seriousl…
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/21 09:05 PM
31

In group settings, fine. One on one time? No. Our take is to avoid the appearance of impropriety. And this is coming from two very not jealous people. I was once on a business trip, and I needed to get some books from a co-worker. They were in his hotel room. I followed him to get them, and as he went to walk into his room, I began to follow. He stopped me and said he would bring them out. And it hit me then - how would it look for the two of us to walk out of his room together should another co…
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/21 01:45 AM
7

Upvote for Curly Girl!! My hair is long and wavy, thick and coarse! Curly Girl saved me!
/r/RedPillWomen19/03/21 06:48 PM
1

I’m not inferior to men. I’m different than a man, yes. Men are far more capable than me physically. They’re more logical than me. I’m grateful that my partner possesses those attributes that I do not. That said, I’m far more intuitive than most men. I’m far more nurturing than most men. I can make an uncomfortable space warm and cozy. These are just a few of the feminine qualities that my husband wants and needs in his life. Just like I want and need someone to approach the loud bang we hear ou…
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/21 04:29 PM
3

Ahh, damn. I’m sorry. I thought jokes were funny. 😉
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 02:31 AM
1

It doesn’t. You cared enough to comment because I do the lion’s share of household work, as if you’re somehow affronted as a woman that I’m responsible for my home. My whole point is that I’m happily married for a long time. I have a happy family. It’s not an accident. You want to be empowered? Be responsible for the happiness of a family. There’s nothing negative about it. I’m doing everything I would do single. But women, oddly enough, like to stand up and call me a...what was it? A “mommy ban…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 02:16 AM
3

I mentioned making breakfast for one. The other one doesn’t eat breakfast. Hmm... How long have you been married? I’m curious how successful you’ve been with your big scoreboard. You can hate me for my happiness all you’d like. I HAVE been very fortunate. I’ve been with one man for more than half my life. A man who will lay his life down for me. A man that doesn’t have issue with me living a life outside of him. A man who loves his kids. A man who fosters my relationships with my friends and fam…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 01:56 AM
3

I’d never expect you to be happy doing what I’m doing. Since, you know, I’m not you. I take immense pleasure in serving my family. And “banging” my husband. That’s why we’ve been married for 19 years and are raising 2 happy and healthy children. Why we own a home, make good money, and have investments. Why we have a large social circle of other happy, healthy people. I control what I can control - me and my behavior. If you intend to control any more than that, you should never marry (male or fe…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 01:22 AM
3

A leader doesn’t equate to a worker bee. I actually expect a lot from my husband (believe it or not). But a homemaker, he is not. But the shit hits the fan and your back is against the wall? He’s the guy you want in your corner, not me.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 12:48 AM
1

We actually do have a maid that comes every couple of weeks to handle toilets, tubs, ceiling fans, baseboards, appliance cleaning, etc. And he doesn’t confuse me with the maid any more than I confuse him with the landscaper. I never said he does nothing. Just that I do more. And I handle most anything INSIDE the house.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 12:45 AM
4

Most people don’t live their lives and run their households based on statistics of other families’ homes. We couldn’t give a crap what everyone else is doing. We both work the same amount of hours outside of the home. I work more hours inside the home. I cook ALL of the dinners. I cook our son’s breakfast before school every morning. I do doctor appointments. Dentist appointments. Orthodontist appointments. Ophthalmologist appointments. I drop off and pick up from school. I clean the kitchen. I …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/21 11:38 PM
12

I’m not sure I understand the question. You still talk to the man who assaulted you? Don’t do that. Cut off contact with anyone who is toxic - period. Anyone. If it’s the oneitis you’re asking about, I understand that term to apply to men who believe their woman is the only woman for them, thereby never living with abundance.
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/21 08:55 PM
6

No way. I don’t have the same sexual appetite my husband does - I’m content about once a week, but longer than that, I get grumpy. I value the connection with my husband that comes from sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/21 09:57 PM
2

No relationship with dad since I was about 22. He went to jail because he’s a monster. He was pretty useless when I was a kid but for his paycheck. My mom is a saint who loves my sister and I unconditionally and makes us a family. She’s remarried. My mom expects my sister and I to be independent, because after 25 years of marriage, her world was upended and she was alone. Husband and I are red-pilled, though I work outside of the home and always have. We didn’t start making incomes where one of …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/21 01:31 AM
3

I’m definitely Acts of Service and Words of Affirmation. Husband is Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation. Thank God neither of us is Gifts. I hate giving and receiving them. So does he. We can pick our own stuff, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/21 02:55 AM
3

I’m fortunate in that my closest friends are women I once worked with who are all crazy about their husbands and who align with most of my major relationship beliefs. I’ve never had to bring up RPW, though I do often find it thrilling to see some of its tenets “in the wild”. I’ve talked to my husband about the red pill, but he’s not a social media guy and doesn’t know any more about it than I’ve told him.
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/21 02:13 AM
2

Yes!! My husband always smells wonderful. I don’t know what it is. There is a Yankee Candle that my daughter calls a “daddy candle” because it smells like him.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/21 04:45 AM
1

Somebody doesn’t understand what RPW is....that’s unfortunate.
/r/RedPillWomen22/12/20 02:59 PM
7

Same for me!! I’m still not interested in other people’s children, but I relish every second with my own.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/20 12:26 AM
1

We have 2. I’d have loved a 3rd, but our finances weren’t where we needed them when we were young to feel comfortable having a 3rd. Husband was snipped a few years ago. Now that we’re older, we both earn a lot more. Husband would like to have a whole slew of kids, but we’re in our late 30s now - our kids are older and very self-sufficient. We don’t want to start over! Not that a vasectomy reversal would actually work anyway. I’m happy, though. One kid of each gender. Both happy and healthy.
/r/RedPillWomen21/11/20 01:12 PM
2

I did until about 5 years ago. Now a maid comes to do the heavy lifting for me - cleaning bathtubs, mopping floors, wiping down baseboards, cleaning ceiling fans - I do all the cooking and dishes. Since husband has been working from home due to COVID, he’s started doing some laundry during his work day (though I didn’t ask him to). My kids are also a bit older, so they help some, too (15 and 11), though it’s mostly just keeping their bedrooms and bathroom picked up.
/r/RedPillWomen19/11/20 12:42 PM
5

I understand your frustration. The other side isn’t great, either. My husband has learned how to “hold” his organs, but it makes it much more difficult to go after he holds it. So I’ll finish and then we’re another 20 minutes making him go - after a full session. I’m not a multi-orgasmic girl. I’m a one trick pony. It’s rough. After a lot of conversation, he stopped holding them. Now when he goes first? He uses his fingers or a vibrator - touches my breasts while I finish - whatever it takes. In…
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/20 01:10 AM
2

So I’m super fortunate. I have a large group of girlfriends, some from junior high, but a majority are women that I worked with at a specific employer over a decade ago. We’re a tight-knit group. For me, it’s all about knowing who I’m dealing with. One of my very best friends can come across in a negative way, but I KNOW she loves me. So when she says something crappy? I really don’t care. I just respond with something funny, or tell her she sounds crabby. It’s always met with “OMG! I’m so sorry…
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/20 01:02 AM
1

I like armpit hair for men, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/20 06:48 PM
1

Not for me!! I like them hairy!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/20 12:43 PM
12

Am I the only woman who likes body hair on a man? I’d you don’t have chest or tummy hair, I’m out. Prefer a beard as well. However, shave your back.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/20 11:14 PM
2

I didn’t mean to imply that women who have sex early on don’t respect themselves. It’s what I chose to respect myself. It was my personal decision. My husband wanted to have sex with me the first time we met, and I can assure you, he would have respected himself the next day. It wouldn’t be incongruent for him to sleep with someone quickly. It would for me.
/r/RedPillWomen04/11/20 03:26 AM
3

I held off on sex until I was ready because I respect myself. My self-respect made my (now) husband respect me. That’s very different than what you just said.
/r/RedPillWomen04/11/20 03:06 AM
1

I lean red pill, and MRP tells us that I’m a reflection of my husband. That would, in turn, mean I’m not whiny. I’m not a victim. Man or woman, in a relationship with a perpetual burden, is carrying the emotional labor. Two well-adjusted adults in a relationship carry all of the labor together.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/20 01:19 PM
9

I hold them all day. But when I lay in bed and relax at night? There’s no holding back. Once he told me I fart in my sleep anyway, I figured I was just delaying the inevitable. But I absolutely try not to.
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/20 06:45 PM
2

From a woman married to a (happy) man for 18 years? Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/20 01:11 AM
1

There are whiny men. We all see their posts on Facebook (or Reddit). They’re victims. They throw themselves pity parties. There is ALWAYS something to complain about. These are the men women can’t handle spending much time with. My stoic husband who has an actual worry, or concern, or sadness from time to time? That’s an emotional burden I will carry with him 100% of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/20 11:07 PM
1

There are whiny men. We all see their posts on Facebook (or Reddit). They’re victims. They throw themselves pity parties. There is ALWAYS something to complain about. These are the men women can’t handle spending much time with. My stoic husband who has an actual worry, or concern, or sadness from time to time? That’s an emotional burden I will carry with him 100% of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/20 11:05 PM
3

There are whiny men. We all see their posts on Facebook (or Reddit). They’re victims. They throw themselves pity parties. There is ALWAYS something to complain about. These are the men women can’t handle spending much time with. My stoic husband who has an actual worry, or concern, or sadness from time to time? That’s an emotional burden I will carry with him 100% of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/20 11:04 PM
2

Definitely raising kids. My husband’s childhood was far different from mine. I’m from a family who hug and kiss - he is not. And I had to be sure that, regardless of the gender of our children, he would be physically affectionate with them. He is!
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/20 10:57 PM
3

Definitely raising kids. My husband’s childhood was far different from mine. I’m from a family who hug and kiss - he is not. And I had to be sure that, regardless of the gender of our children, he would be physically affectionate with them. He is!
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/20 10:56 PM
5

It still makes sense for men and women with traditional values who are looking for a life long commitment to one another.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/20 10:53 PM
2

It still makes sense for men and women with traditional values who are looking for a life long commitment to one another.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/20 10:53 PM
2

It still makes sense for men and women with traditional values who are looking for a life long commitment to one another.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/20 10:53 PM
13

I think I would have loved being a SAHM. When we started having kids, we were young and not making the money that was needed for me to do it. My career sort of took off, as did his, and now that I could do it, my kids are in middle and high school. And I work from home full time, so I still get to do school drop off and pick up, after school snacks, and hearing about their day. By the time they snack and do homework, I’m off work anyway. There just isn’t a need for me to be a SAHM anymore. I don…
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/20 04:09 PM
3

Great answer. We had a therapist once tell us that anger is not a primary emotion, but a secondary one. The primary emotion may erupt in anger, but the anger comes second. It seemed to be true for both of us, so we started really focusing on the primary emotion, dropping the defenses, and admitting to one another what that primary emotion was. Life changing stuff.
/r/RedPillWomen27/10/20 11:42 PM
1

Been married 18 years, so I’m expecting this will be my only relationship - no need to have luck for future relationships.
/r/RedPillWomen26/10/20 11:20 AM
34

RPW and RPM don’t always jive. Yes, women are capable of loving men, but we don’t love in the same way. I don’t like to speak for every woman, but for me, the only unconditional love I have is for my children. I do NOT love my husband unconditionally - it absolutely has conditions. I believe men are more likely to love their wives unconditionally.
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/20 10:26 PM
4

My husband and I started dating in high school - he wasn’t even old enough to get a job yet (15). Therefore, in order to take me on a date once a week, he kept the money his dad gave him for lunch, went hungry, and paid for our date. A HVM, IMO, isn’t looking for a 50/50 split from his girl (for dates or trips or whatever). I’d forego the highlights if you can’t afford them. Focus on being healthy and clean if that’s all you can afford.
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/20 11:39 PM
10

The way your mother feels about your partner is no one’s business but her own. If she isn’t overtly being rude, you should just let it go. We like who we like. Our moms like who they like.
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/20 12:37 PM
20

I think referring to a man as a “manlet” is gross and offensive.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/20 04:56 PM
1

1) Yes. Together 21 years. Married 18. 2) Fame would be hell for us. We enjoy the autonomy to do what we want without people watching every move we make. Money? While we’re comfortable, we aren’t rich. It would mean retirement. More toys. Setting our kids up with homes of their own when they’re old enough to move out. Taking care of our families. The same goals we have now - it would just get here quicker. 3) Even if I didn’t like my husband, the worst time to begin another relationship is after…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/20 08:49 PM
1

Female: Pros: I’m a caretaker by nature. I enjoy cooking for the people in my life and serving them with the gifts I have. I make a six-figure salary, which is very good in my area, especially for someone who didn’t go to college since I couldn’t afford it. I’m not a spender. I hate to shop. Unless it’s food, and then I like the cleanest, tastiest ingredients. I’m a great, great mom. I’m raising productive, smart, funny, and respectful kids who are completely secure in who they are. My boundarie…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/20 08:10 PM
–

I made homemade plum jelly just over a week ago, and while my husband and kids were skeptical over any jelly that isn’t grape, they’ve eaten a whole jar so far!
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/20 08:06 PM
8

My best friend and I have recently taken up canning. Our husbands saw the haul after our first round of green beans and were so stoked with the outcome, the next weekend they helped us do another bushel of beans and 216 ears of corn. They decided they loved the outcome, but not so much the act of canning. 😂 She and I love it, though! I’m into horror movies. We camp and boat a lot. I enjoy obedience training with our dogs. I cook a lot, and really enjoy pretty much every aspect of food. I like do…
/r/RedPillWomen06/08/20 08:30 PM
4

18 years married. 21 years together.
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/20 11:20 PM
21

We’re here! Together 21 years this year. Married 18. We’ve been together since high school. My husband is far from perfect, just like me, but I know who he is. Our kids and myself are the reason he gets up every day and busts his butt. He’s honest to a fault. He picks me every day. Good men are everywhere. It’s all about learning how to read a person to see who is a good fit and who isn’t.
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/20 01:48 AM
1

Then why not just pass over it and go on about your day? Why take your precious time to be rude?
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/20 12:11 PM
2

Agreed. The secret to staying married for life? Don’t get divorced. Be a grown up. Vet your partner, and then stick it out. There are tough years and fantastic years. If you vet well, then you are both looking toward the same future in whichever season you’re in. And this is what I learned from my husband years ago when I was ready to throw in the towel.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/20 01:39 AM
2

I agree with you to a point. I feel equal to my husband (but we’re old). He serves me in ways, such as the heavy lifting, opening doors, pumping my gas, but I serve him in other ways, such as cooking his dinner, preparing his plate, washing his underwear. It has to go both ways. As much I hate the phrase due to its racist connotations, it’s true in the male/female roles: separate but equal.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/20 12:49 AM
1

Married 18 years - he knows my passwords, and if he requests to go through my phone, I’d let him. But I’d be pissed. And I would never go through his, unless major red flags came to light. That’s the thing - if you feel the need to look through the phone, there’s a major trust problem, even if your partner isn’t being inappropriate.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/20 11:04 PM
8

I love men, yes. I love their masculinity and their desire to provide and protect. I love their strength and logic. I love their knowledge. I do not, however, trust men as a whole. I trust my husband and other male family members because I know who they are as people. The rest of them do not get the benefit of the doubt.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/20 10:58 PM
1

This. People who hit are people who hit. They’re like pedophiles - can’t be rehabilitated.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 04:36 PM
1

My husband went into a trade (electrician) after high school. It was a 5-year apprenticeship program, but the schooling was free and after each year of schooling completed, he got a decent salary bump. He has since moved into the office as an estimator. When I was in high school, my business teacher placed me at a local bank. The last half of my school day was working as a teller. I was paid and got high school credit for it as well. I didn’t go to college. This created connections, and I stayed…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/20 02:33 PM
4

Yes! This was me! First kid at 23 and second at 27. I have a career and a life outside of my family, but my kids are BY FAR the most important piece of my life. Even though I was mostly ambivalent about whether I’d even have kids. I had a great mom, though, so in many ways, I think I’d been trained my whole life what it looked like to be selfless and loving for one’s family. Just curious what your mama was like - was she awesome, too?
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/20 02:07 AM
155

Have kids when you’re READY. Financially responsible. In a mature marriage. Mature yourself. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done, and I wasn’t a person who had to have kids to be happy. I was on the fence, but it was incredibly important to my husband. It’s a sacrifice of who you’ve been as a person. Every thought is consumed by what is best for your kids. You have to be patient, and kind, and gentle, and positive. But the payoff is indescribable. To watch these little people who were borne of th…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/20 11:10 PM
5

I would guess college wasn’t in their plans for their girls. ☹️
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/20 07:11 PM
4

I somewhat agree. I’m very open with my kids. I don’t lie or sugarcoat. I encourage them to follow whatever dream they may have. But the fact of the matter is, dreams usually change between 13 and 21, and I want my kids to know that that is OK!! Don’t feel bad for changing your major. Don’t feel bad if you have dreams of being married by 23, but then decide you aren’t ready or haven’t met the right person. It’s normal and expected. Ultimately, we want our kids to know we support their dreams and…
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/20 07:01 PM
5

She’s young and doesn’t know what she wants yet IMO, and I don’t mean this as an insult at all, but my dream for my children is that they’re happy. That’s it. I’d love to see them hold the same traditional family values that we raised them with, of course, but that’s a distant second to wanting them to be true to who THEY are. You can’t fit a square peg in a round hole.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/20 06:23 PM
1

It’s my lack of using the right word, I think. I like a tummy and broad shoulders. Chris is too cut for my liking. And it’s not about height at all, though at 5’8”, I want a guy close to my height (no shorter than 5’5”).
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/20 02:50 AM
1

Big no. He’s not big - he’s trim. And NO long hair.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/20 11:30 AM
51

You don’t “convert”. He has to be interested in a serious relationship for it to become one. To me, he just sounds not that interested in you or the relationship. I’d cut my losses and move on.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/20 03:08 PM
-1

I disagree with this completely. I like big, hairy men. Like a lumberjack. But well-groomed. I am not into the Chris Hemsworth look AT ALL.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/20 01:52 PM
1

We must hang in different crowds. The few women I know who are SAHMs don’t feel like they’re sacrificing. It’s what they want. And actually, they’re incredibly grateful for their husbands “sacrifice” of supporting his family (which also isn’t a sacrifice).
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/20 01:05 PM
2

Be a whole person always - not just half of a couple. Nothing is more unattractive than a person who makes their partner the center of their world. But leave room for the other person in your life, too, and share common goals and interests. Have and maintain boundaries. Make the decision every day to love your partner, even when they’re not being very lovable.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/20 04:15 PM
1

Agreed. I don’t think it’s the norm. I make more than my husband, though we both do pretty well. I make about $30k a year more than him. But when we married, we made close to the same amount (which was very little). If I had to pick a new spouse now, I’m not sure what attributes I’d look for, though income would certainly be on the list. I don’t want to take care of someone else. My husband and I earned everything together, and had nothing when we got married. At this stage in my life, it would …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/20 01:31 PM
–

Wow. This is awesome! Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/20 06:30 PM
–

They’re mostly music CDs, though we have some blanks as well.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/20 11:21 AM
–

We bought my parents’ house in November, but we aren’t moving into it until the house they’re building is completed. I’ve been working on getting things incredibly organized and shedding unwanted/unused/unnecessary items before the move. My pantry looks like a million bucks, but I’m struggling with certain items (like CDs). We have a ton of CDs, but we don’t use CDs. I want to chuck them. Husband doesn’t. So they’ve been sitting in a box in the floor at our stalemate. If we’re keeping them, I ne…
/r/RedPillWomen15/01/20 06:59 PM
0

Married high school sweetheart. 20 years together. Can confirm!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/19 02:50 AM
1

Same.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/19 11:35 AM
1

I earn 40% more. And I do the household chores (admittedly, we also have a maid who cleans bathrooms, floors, dusts, etc). It really only amounts to daily laundry, cooking (3 meals a day), dishes, sweeping, dropping kids at school, picking kids up from school... I don’t consider it mothering, though. And my husband and son take care of the lawn, husband fixes anything and everything, handles son’s football and Boy Scouts activities, and other similar things. He’ll tell you I do more work in the …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/19 12:35 PM
3

We have a daughter and a son. While I’m not a girly girl, I’m still a woman, and husband and I have very different ways in dealing with our kids. When it comes to our son, who is 10, I’m much more inclined to baby him and do everything for him. I’m in the nurturing role. Husband is in the teaching role. The pushing him beyond his comfort zone role. While my son and I are incredibly close and loving, it’s not mom he’s looking for on the sidelines of his football games - it’s dad. It’s not mom he …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/19 11:29 AM
2

Oddly enough, I have a husband and kids, and I work from a home office in finance. I’ve never considered myself a SAHM, though I suppose that’s literally what I am. A mom who is home all day, even though I’m working a “real” 8-5 job.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/19 06:27 PM
1

This was exactly the scenario I was going to use. I love my kids unconditionally. If they murdered 10 toddlers and molested their dead bodies, I would still love them. I would visit them in jail. Send them money. Talk to them on the phone. There are no conditions under which I would not love them. But they are the ONLY unconditional love that I have. A marriage is a contract however. It’s about value add. I love my husband with lots of conditions. He has to be employed. He has to be faithful. No…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/19 12:30 PM
3

I don’t know if it’s hypergamy or if you’re just not attracted to him on a basic level. You’ll have to decide that. As someone else stated above, “in love” waxes and wanes. When I start to lose the giddy feelings about my husband, I double down. I work harder for him. Make his favorite meals. Send him texts during the day telling him how wonderful he is. Rub his arm while we watch TV. And it never fails - “faking” it for a few days brings all of those butterflies back for me.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/19 07:31 PM
1

I will read it! Thank you! I agree regarding my fitness, and it’s something I’m actively working on now. I’m also working on the frequency of sex. We haven’t had any issues with attraction yet, and I’m mindful not to starfish. I’m willing to perform the actions and positions that he enjoys, and I enjoy giving him pleasure. But frequency should definitely be addressed.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/19 12:34 PM
1

I would imagine we each have our own purpose - to lead by example, to keep a spouse happy, to make the world a better place. Not sure why the purpose would change your answer to the question.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/19 04:59 PM
2

No, it doesn’t matter what you think. That doesn’t mean I’m not interested in what you think or wouldn’t take into consideration what you think. I mean, I did ask. Hubby doesn’t like make up. He’s verbally said that he’s glad he wakes up to the same face that he spends his days with. He probably does like dresses. My question about femininity isn’t “Is what I’m doing OK?” I know it’s OK. It’s a broader question. “Is that enough?” Should we all strive toward the ultimate definition of womanhood? …
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/19 04:29 PM
1

It’s nice to know I’m not alone! Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/19 01:42 AM
10

All but the staying in shape! We’ve certainly been lax in that area, but we’re both working on it now and having fun with it. I could certainly discuss with him, but he’s really a great man and wouldn’t hurt my feelings. Even if he wanted something I’m not giving him, I’m not sure he’d tell me.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/19 01:42 AM
25

I am not a crier, but this response made me tear up. This was beautiful. Thank you.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/19 01:40 AM
2

I married a guy like this. His whole family has the short fuse, so it was perfectly normal to him. But it wasn’t to me, and I didn’t want it to be for my kids. He tried meds - didn’t work. Finally got in with a therapist when I told him I couldn’t live that way anymore - I crave peace in all areas of my life, especially at home. Therapy actually helped LOADS! He has to be very careful to not set expectations - ie, get home from work at 5:30, load car, leave at 6:25 - when expectations aren’t met…
/r/RedPillWomen07/08/19 11:54 PM
8

A pretty immature response for a grown woman, and not at all becoming....
/r/RedPillWomen07/08/19 12:10 AM
1

The topic of the most is whether money matters to women, and you implied that it does if a woman doesn’t want her husband to be a SAHD (otherwise, why ask the question of the previous poster?). I wanted you to be aware there are other reasons to not want a SAHD as a partner. Not sure what status has to do with it....
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/19 09:17 PM
1

I wouldn’t disagree with that. There are always outliers. I’m no branch swinger. I don’t do drama or argue or hamster. I say what I mean and don’t use manipulation to get my way. I think that makes me an outlier. My whole point of my first post was, just because someone isn’t OK with their husband being a SAHD doesn’t mean it’s all about the money. I don’t care what my husband makes, but he has to do SOMETHING and MAKE something.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/19 09:12 PM
1

I accept that they exist. ;) I like traditional gender roles in a marriage, and I believe in a lot of red pill concepts. I believe a man should hold down a job and at least contribute financially to support his family. I don’t believe men are wired to be caretakers 100% of the time. Not to say that some don’t do a fantastic job - they do!! But it’s not the norm. Just as I think it’s proper for a husband to lead his family, since that’s what men are best at, I also believe they should use their m…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/19 09:06 PM
1

I have no issue with SAHMs. But I can’t get down with SAHDs.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/19 08:56 PM
1

He actually gets to work from home sometimes, too! I love when he’s here, actually. He comes home daily for lunch so we can eat together. My point, which you seem to be missing, perhaps due to my poor wording, is that he has to work (ie have a paying job). But I don’t care what that job is or how much he earns. No SAHD for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/19 08:50 PM
1

Lol - I’m not a SAHM. We both would have loved it if we’d been able to work that out, but it wasn’t in the cards. I’m lucky enough now, though, that I work from home. So I’m here when the kids get home from school. Im actually the bigger source of income in our household, but I love how presumptuous you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/19 08:44 PM
1

I’m not OK with my husband being a SAHD. But not because of money. He can shovel shit for pennies for all I care, but he WILL work outside of the home if we’re married. It’s my double standard and I own it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/19 08:21 PM
10

My draw to red pill is that it’s honest. Honestly, there is NO unconditional love between romantic partners on either side. My love for my husband is conditional - it’s conditioned on what he brings to the table - money, humor, affability, orgasms, he squashes bugs - whatever your “thing” is. I’m not foolish enough to think that he loves me unconditionally, either, though appearance certainly isn’t the only thing he finds attractive about me. I’m frugal, a great cook, a great mom, tell wicked jo…
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/19 06:53 PM
4

We used a chain service for a few years (Two Maids and a Mop), but it was pretty pricey! I have a family member who cleans for a living, so as soon as she had an opening, we jumped on it. Saved me a whopping $55 per cleaning. If you find an individual, it’s going to cost less, but I worried about a vetting process. How would I know they won’t steal from us? I’d suggest reaching out to friends and family for as many solid referrals as you can get!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 01:40 AM
2

Not sure if it’s in the cards, but we hire a cleaning lady. Honestly, I’d work 3 jobs if it meant I didn’t have to scrub toilets and showers. We both work full time and have two kids in activities. We also spend a good chunk of weekends at our place at the lake in the spring, summer, and fall - so having the time can be difficult. I have a Deebot vacuum (cheaper brand of a Roomba), which actually does a great job. Helps me stay on top of the dog hair and all I have to do is hit a button and it w…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 12:35 AM
2

https://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/shrimp-vodka-pasta This is easy and delicious. I do add a lot of Parmesan to the sauce as well. My husband would kill a man for it, and it’s one of the few meals that both of my kids request.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 12:25 AM
3

Husband and I waited a year and a half. Granted, we were high school students and each other’s first. That said, I wouldn’t even consider sex at two months in, even if my husband were dead and I had to go back into the dating pool. Before I give that up, I need to know the relationship has staying power, and you don’t know that at two months. Not for religious reasons. Not because I’m a prude. Not because I don’t like sex. Because for me, sex comes with an emotional connection and strengthens th…
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/19 05:57 PM
1

I think you’re fooling yourself. When a man wants you, he will move heaven and earth to have you, not list a bunch of reasons why it won’t work. Cut the dead weight and find a guy who is on your wavelength.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/19 05:44 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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